#SOMETHING THAT WONT EXPLODE ON ME

[hcdragonwrites]

HELLO FRIENDS HOLIDAY CHAOS IS OVER!

Or - at the very least- as over as it is going to be. There will still be stress and such but i think the storm has passed. I can poke my little nose out of my burrow and start taking a collective look about and branch back into creating.

I have some very exciting news- well. Exciting for me personally. I bought a computer !

For about a year or more now ive been computer-less and writing everything and anything on my phone(like the hobgoblin I am). So formatting and beauty was not something i could see or do for any of my Computer based peeps. I just wrote. I used to write on my old computer- but when it began to get buggy too I migrated to my phone. Then that computer - well…

It kinda imploded.

SO! I made the big decision to invest and bought the little laptop of my dreams. Ive wanted a Mac computer since I was 12 (those old blue desktop ones were SO COOL!)

Im learning the ropes still with it (i legit just got it out of the box two days ago) and feeling it out. I have to get all my apps onto it that I use for writing and then

THEN I CAN LET LOOSE THE FLOOD GATES. I HAVE THINGS RATTLING IN MY SKULL. IDEAS FOR LITTLE FICS, CONTINUING MY FIC, BRANCHING INTO OTHER CONTENT AND FANBASES AND FINALLY. F I N A L L Y. Getting the hardcore draft of my first novel set up. Big plans for 2024. Im ready and excited and i cant wait. This year imma grab it and make it mine!

#long post #sorry loves #hcwrites #writing stuff #personal things #but long story short #I GOT MY LAPTOP #THE THING IVE WANTED FOR LIKE MY WHOLE LIFE AND THE BRAND I WANT #SOMETHING THAT WONT EXPLODE ON ME #OR ALWAYS POP UP LIKE WINDOWS ADVERTS #IM SO EXCITED. #Its like buying a car omg im budgetting it out and im on a plan to pay it but I DID IT #I GOT SOMETHING RELIABLE #now #i can write #and not have my hands cramp #god #god i miss writing

[snekdood]

"if we make america worse and more of a dictatorship that will be even harder to unravel and make it the way we want the country to be, maybe then everyone will join our Glorious Revolution!" bb girl you cant even be in the same room with someone who thinks you should vote, how in tf do you think you're gonna unite people to fight in The Revolution with you? it's gonna be you and your 5 friends, i hate to break it to you.

#i dont think you realize how repelling you and your politics are to everyone else #you get all of your validation for how Smart You Are from your friends and ignore any kind of feedback that suggests you should #change or do something differently. thats the only reason you're so convinced average people will go along with you bc you keep getting #affirmation from the people who ALREADY agree with you- but you have NO IDEA how to bridge the gap between people who agree #with you and disagree with you. you're horrible at convincing people of your side of things outside of straight up guilt tripping them #or bullying them like a highschooler. im sorry but the tools you learned to survive with as a kid aren't gonna help you in this situation. #the ONLY THING you can come up with to bridge that gap is a bloody revolution. thats how bad you are at this. #and you're also so bad at this and unimaginative that you dont even realize how THAT might not even be enough. #you cant imagine ANY kind of avenue to getting people to change AT ALL outside of blood and fire. and thats why people call you #an authoritarian. #i'll be honest- i really do think the world would be a better place if we did incremental change under a democratic president who wont #set the world on fire vs the godkingemperor republican WHO WONT EVEN LISTEN TO YOU AT ALL EVER AND MIGHT KILL YOU #FOR PUTTING UP A STINK. idk if you noticed but if that evil fuck gets into office we are severely outnumbered if he gets police #n shit to go after his own citizens. letting trump win is making this battle so much harder than it needs to be. #you are choosing trying to fix the world while its exploding vs trying to fix it before it explodes at all. #what is this like a procrastination thing? you wanna wait till the last minute to try? idfgi. wtf is wrong with you #throwing minority lives away to prove a point. and then you try to tell me you care. gtfoh. #accelerationists should never be taken seriously.

[quietwingsinthesky]

journey’s end au where the doctor tries to kick everyone off the TARDIS and they just go, ‘???? no?’ and won’t leave. can’t be stupid and think everyone will leave you when they won’t get out of your house.

#the doctor is simultaneously so happy about this and SO annoyed. get out of his house!!! this is his tardis!!!! #(tentoo voice) OUR tardis. (doctor voice) MY TARDIS!!!!! #rose and martha and donna and jack are literally having a girls night in the same room as this argument #sarah jane was invited but did not join them. autisms. #however mickey and her have been bonding and the doctor feels so betrayed. sarah jane is supposed to be on his side!!! #can’t even complain to the metal dog. k-9 is still busy. #(sarah jane voice) oh i should invite luke and his friends- (doctor voice) NO CHILDREN ON MY SHIP #((tentoo voice. from the other room.) OUR ship) #jack manages to sneak ianto and gwen on board before sarah jane gets the bannerman gang in simply because torchwood is easier wrangled than #literal children (not saying much) #how does gwen manage to sneak rhys on that one time? no one’s really sure. he didn’t stay on very long but it was long enough for jack to #lose a bet. #i think only jackie leaves but NOT before she and tentoo and rose have established interdimensional facetime so that she can phone her #daughter and her son-in-law and her guy-who-her-son-in-law-is-cloned-from #(doctor voice) donna i need to erase ur memories ur brain will explode otherwise (rose from across the room) hey didnt i absorb something #that would explode my brain once. i still have my memories. (donna voice) YEAH DOCTOR CARE TO EXPLAIN THAT???? #donna metacrisis is solved because jack says ‘fuck it let me eat the metacrisis somehow it probably wont kill me’ and then he glows for like #a week but he’s fine. #he is literally never getting rid of any of them. get found family-ed idiot #(god wait funniest fucking thing if end of time happens here and the master’s plans are completely derailed because he gets tackled by seven #different companions. kicking him while he’s on the ground while the doctor goes D:) #doctor who #tardis family au

[vang0bus]

idk i think i might dislike she/her pronouns less coming from strangers or family members if my friends actually used she for me

#like. seriously guys if i said i use any pronouns. or he/she irl. its fine to use she/her i wont explode #this isnt @ anyone here its just something i find a little frustrating #it would be nice if i had some people using she/her for me who dont actually see me as a woman

[bones-n-bookles]

Thinking a lot rn and I wouldn't change much about Torch. What I would change is primarily just that I wish I'd raised him and things that are ways he's less typical for a laika (pls be more aloof sir). I honestly find him to be an incredibly easy dog to live and work with, and I love working with him. I've lived with "easier" dogs and none of them lit me up like he does and most of them overwhelmed me in ways he doesn't.

I love that he works with me and not for me. I love his drive. I love the bond that we built together. I love his prey drive and can't wait to hunt with him. I love his intelligence. I got a high drive high energy hunting spitz and I love every bit of that about him. He makes me a better person and a happier person and a healthier person and a more active person.

I'm really more of a cat person than a dog person, for all of my adhd about dogs. I like lots of dogs but I love all cats and WSL fit the things that make me love cats while also giving me the opportunity to go backpacking and mushing and hunting with them, without the things that overwhelm or frustrate me about most dogs.

I wouldn't recommend him for everyone. But he's perfect for me and I can't see myself ever not having one.

#idle rambling #idk just something ive been thinking about a lot #i love lots of individual dogs dont get me wrong #but i love everything about wsl that ive heard and experienced #in a way that i dont for like. labs lol. or even siberian huskies #id own specific sibes. id own specific gsd. etc #but the laika who dont sound ideal to me are outliers lol #the things that make torch terrible for most people make him perfect for me #i wont say that looks dont play into it #i wouldnt own them if i thought they were ugly. if they looked like boxers but were otherwise identical i would not own them lol #but i also love how many sibes look and dont really want those except maybe some of the ones im really fond of or their offspring #idk #anyways #my thoughts arent all together on this still but i gotta walk the boyo and not just revise this 5 million times #and i was gonna explode if i didnt get it Out Of My System

[harvestmoth]

oh also this real quick

#tsukuyos like this in my minds eye #spent like the past hour thinking about how theyd work #all i ended up with was headcanons about their traumas #all i got out of it was that i think theyd both bottle up any grievances theyd have and i cant think of anyway theyd fight #like a couples fight. yknow. the healthy ones #cause like. to me i think ashley would be the type to bottle something up and never bring it up #sayings its all fine and good and putting up a brave and easy going face. worrying morw about how others feel and ignoring herself #while i think tsukuyo would also bottle things up but in a more silently stewing in it way i guess? #idk. like a silent treatment type thing or something that she’d eventually end up exploding over?? idk. straw that broke the camel’s back #idk! maybe all this shows is how much i have no clue about anything at all especially about relationships #anyways moment of weakness wont happen again probably look at the funny ashkuyo lo #basically im just gonna keep posting about making fun of them i cant be serious with them at all #magia record #ashkuyo

[opens-up-4-nobody]

Me, explaining things in a way that's completely incoherent: I don't understand what you find so difficult to comprehend???

#i think the problem is that something in my brain structures information in a way thats hard for other people to understand #it may be a dyslexia thing. but it is the most frustrating thing to be misunderstood without any #idea of howbwhat ur saying doesnt make sense. like. look. fucking. its right there. laid out in a way that looks like an absolute disaster #bc u would think with as many control issues id b extremely organized but no. i kno where everything is #but its in a pile. aye. this project is such a clusterfuck #this is how my brain collapses. what sort of shape will i b in by the time we finish? (ie my birthday lol) #let's not think abt it. it wont b good. #everyday i get texts and emails and i have to put my head down and take a deep breath so by brain doesnt explode. the amount of psychic #pain i am burdened with when i open my manuscript doc is shocking. #is this my villian origin story? ive lost the ability to not look like im in pain while im in meetings. if u pay close attention u can see #the misery behind my eyes. my boss is gonna turn up the 23rd and b like: ready to go get icecream to celebrate #ur paper and phd accptance? and im gonna b like: i would rather eat glass #if u try to rope me into a surprise party i might walk out. excpet i wont bc im not that much of a brat #theres nothing to celebrate. just let me lay down on the floor for a while #unrelated

[jonny-b-meowborn]

One of the early signs of me being a dog was how when I was a kid I loved to bite popsicle sticks, but I didn't understand why. I didn't know I'm autistic and sensory seeking, but I did know that puppies love to bite things. So that was my explanation for why I loved doing is so much: my urge to bite was the same as dogs' urge to bite. I was just like them :3

#i still love stimming by biting stuff #and somtimes its literally like. if i dont bite something right now im going to explode #usually i go for like hoodie strings or necklaces or just straight up my fingers (but not like hard enough to hurt myself) #but my favorite thing to bite are juice boxes #because they feel nice between my teeth and i can just shred them to pieces #because theyre like cardboard #and it takes a long time to completely destroy a big juice box and its soooo satisfying its the best shit #anyway other thing that pointed to me being a puppy was how anytime i played pretend with other kids Id choose to be a dog 80% of the time #like if we played house or stuff like that. no i wont be the daughter or the mom im gonna be the family dog #or id play an animal-like character. anthro animal dragon shapeshifter stuff like that #i just always wanted to be like a dog and i was like a puppy. i was a puppy #silly stuff #therianposting #bee buzz

[lowestechelonabomination]

if not friends, why hanging out? checkmate

anyway the platonic kunihigu brainrot is still going strong. I suddenly remembered that the Rainy Season cards are things that exist, so I very quickly made some low quality edits of the battle sprites on my phone while eating bacon and lightly toasted white bread for dinner at 11 pm. also happy (almost belated) birthday to Higuchi, I really wanted to draw something with her but didn't have the time :'/

#tumblr still wont let me rearrange images >:( #anyway someone please join me in my kunihigu friendship hell i cant just lose my mind over here alone #are these images horribly out of character for them? yeah #but they look aesthetic so. you know #also sorry for how blurry kunikida looks in that last image #but also its not like i put effort into this #i just saw the matching outfits and thought 'ohoh' and so here i am #*shaking computer screen* FRIENDS THEY ARE FRIENDS THEY HJSGJKSDHGJSKHDSKHD *explodes* #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd edit #bsd kunikida #bsd higuchi #bsd mayoi #if you need context on why some random tumblr user decided that kunikida and higuchi would ever be friends #go scroll back through my blog or something #i rambled about them yesterday and explained what i think of them but in a very incoherent way because it was like 3 am #its. complicated i think #and im too tired to reexplain everything in the tags here #just take this #and also join me in my hell if you want

[naw-naw-honeyimgood]

I have noticed a recurring theme in the characters I like that they're far too nice and forgive people who've hurt them far too easily. "It's fine" "I never blamed you" "There's nothing you need to apologize for"

meanwhile I'm two steps behind them snarling over their shoulder going "c'mon let me beat them up please it'll make me feel SO much better and they DESERVE it"

#wouldn't have said anything but this is also a thing i do for wei ying so i was like 'ah so this is a pattern' #but thought this up while reading a yaoi abo where mc lost his SERIOUS BOYFRIEND to his CHILDHOOD FRIEND #bcuz they turned out to be a fated pair #and then i mean its a yaoi obv mc eventually moves on and finds someone else #but this is like a good time after THOSE two get together #so now that mc finally has a relationship he can TRUST wont EXPLODE IN HIS FACE #which is only something he even eared in the first place because of not only EXPERIENCE but also TRAUMA #but only now does the childhood friend come by to say sorry????? #like??????? #lemme tell you if i had a long time partner that i LOVED who turned out to be “”“”DESTINED“”“” for MY childhood friend #like i have low self-esteem id prob be like 'oh theyll make each other happy :')' #but my childhood friend would flip FATE ass over teakettle bein like “YOU THINK IM GOING TO JUST GET WITH WITH MY BEST FRIENDS BOYFRIEND??” #which is the correct response #so the fact that this shitty-ass childhood friend not only absolutely WENT with it #he ALSO literally never apologized until mc was mostly past it #thats no fucking friend #dont mind me goin feral #ugh #yaoi

[ikilledamanforthisurl]

Minami Anon x3 but so real………. Yeah idk how old he's meant to be but he very much gives me like 21-30 35 at oldest age range vibes. Which I think/agree is a factor in Why He Is Like That. I know its technically noncanon but i also think a lot about the implications of Minami once never drinking but then when he discovered fire breathing he started drinking 24/7 from this one scene w Majima in dead souls like hmmmmmmm….. wonder what’s going on there buddy…….. something you'd like to share with the class Minami about how you perceive yourself/any potential wants for attention. Anyways it’s okay if the you sound untranslatable I understand and also relate to that feeling of 24/7 thinking i come across as incomprehensible 💖 no pressure to do so but I would personally love to read that Saejima teacher ramble and how it affects Minami etc etc also

ohhh man it's canon. if we're taking rggo's scraps as having some relevancy then dead souls absolutely is canon. and more importantly, its canon TO ME (takes consecutive puffs of my copium inhaler)

yeah i had this at the ready. yeah. i tear my shirt open and it has "the line from dead souls where Majima outs Minami as a fucking square" tattooed across my chest. not the line itself but those exact words. i cannot describe how his charm shot thru the fucking roof to me when i heard he used to be completely straight edge!! what a fucking dork!! come here i'm giving you a wedgie boy

and then the ehhhh half-subjective half-objective tragedy of him succumbing to a vice to the point of functional alcoholism (or currently functional aud as some folks call it, which is unfortunate naming conventions for those who use australian currency) implying he's been a "pretty good drinker" for an extended amount of time. and the kicker is majima totally could not care less. there's no evidence to Him Specifically being the one who got Minami to drink but it's absolutely regular Family practice, if the boy wants to fit in with the Majimagumi he needs to top up!

hc shit-i-made-up territory but i LIKE to believe that Majima personally influenced him this way during whatever limited time they had in direct contact with each other (cause while you COULD have their dynamic between a twat who signed up + the twat who runs the business and nothing more its not as fun. a little too parasocial methinks) but this is 99% due to me finding a song that makes me imagine the perfect sequence for this (dont get me.started on Majimagumi songs. i like to delude myself into thinking i'll animate to one of them eventually). also considering the kind of man Majima was during Shimano-servant-era i feel like it wouldnt be too out of character. he's not a malicious person but by god he does stupid shit and hurts people so much in so many horrific ways he could not care less about putting some highschool level peer-pressure shit on the new recruit just because he's Bored. what's one more hurt person in the grand scheme of things.

Alllso... getting back on track..? WHY was Minami straight edge in the first place. it could be any reason under the sun but the way it's worded here really sounds like it took a lot of willpower to break his resolve to just have a sip, just tryyyyyyy it, yadda yadda. if Minami is as punk as i totally project unto him to be, then he'd be no stranger to lives lived in excess..... i could not tell you for certain that Straight-Edge was a Punk Thing in pre-2010 Japan whatsoever. an attitude, sure, but i'm talking music scene shit........ however, gigs involve lots of booze at the bare minimum regardless of country. 'tis just the way of life. and 'tis a plausible outlet for WHY he seemed to have such a strong unwillingness to drink....

you know, outside of other stuff like experiences with friends and family. those can work too. those are considerably more sad and personal... those can work alongside gig culture shit. i dont have anything explicitly outlined but its definitely something i'd like to write for him... make up a little backstory so i can maybe explore some themes that RGG wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole, like addiction. it interests me a lot and getting it somewhat RIGHT interests me a lot. i know for sure RGG would fuck it up LMAO

#ikildaman shut the fuck up #also it provides an easily-contained plot outline that wont explode into tojo-wide world-ending conspiracy nonsense! #just kidding drug trade in the yakuza is canon 2 me and itd easily be the biggest form of income #fucking with their drugs IS a tojo-wide conspiracy #but speaking of which i also hc Minami as being even more staunchly against other forms of inebriation.... #cause yall remember that VA who got wholly blacklisted for being photographed lining up regular gummy bears #japans attitude on drugs is ABYSMAL #also. speaking of his friends and family. i like to think his tattoo of the womans face is related to that 😁😁😁 #its such a mysterious and strange design choice to me. like WHOOO IS SHEEEE..???? #shes got to have some significance and if she doesnt well idc i decide she does #maybe family... maybe a friend..... possibly. somebody he lost #possibly to something related to unsobriety maybe. i dunno yet. but maybe #feels more original than defaulting to the abusive drunk parent stereotype and calling it a day #not that you couldnt also do that. i do like to believe his family sucked for whatever reason #nishida having folks at home isnt like uncommon in the yakuza by any means but i dont think its regular #plus with him being such an immature/lost dude..... where is your father boy........... #ALSO YES ^_^ i will try to post my teacher saejima realness sometime soon!!!!!

[sonknuxadow]

Hiiiiii hello

#sorry for the inactivity and unanswered asks and things like that #i just have not been doing very well lately and havent been in the mood to do much of anything #i wont go into detail but these past 7 days have quite possibly been one of the Worst weeks of my entire life #but hopefully things will only get better from here. if september is not nicer to me than august was i will explode probably #maybe i will get back to flooding your dash with hedgehogs soon #also i know i dont owe anyone an explanation its not a big deal if i stop posting for a little bit etc etc #but im usually more active than this so i just wanted to make sure nobody thinks i died or something #ummm i dont really know how to tag vent-y posts sorry if anyone doesnt wanna see stuff like this

[femme-malewife]

I knew today was going to be a bad day.

#we were just so fucking busy and stressed. esp bc one girl didnt even show up today so we were understaffed #and over an hour ago this old bitch did SOMETHING in the bathroom and it overfilled and clogged the toilet #and my fucking fatass dumb coworker Flushes the toilet and literall #i am NOT fucking exaggerating when i say old man feces went ALL OVER THE FUCKING FLOOR. #LITERALLY FLOODED OUT OF THE TOILET BOWL AND ALL OVER. #you could dedass smell it from wayy on the other end of the store #it took over an hour of clean up and febreeze and bleach and just #good fucking lord #i helped out but it was mostly my manager/pal who had to clean it #and bc he was out of commission and my fatass coworker didnt have any food to make or anything #it was JUST me and one other girl doing EVERYTHING ELSE #fucking scrambling #and shit kept breaking down and some stuff kinda exploded in the middle of the rush #and the stupid bastard just stood there and watched #AND HE WAS STILL THE FIRST TO BE ABLE TO FUCKING LEAVE #im so. fucking upset rn im actually in tears from stress #if i see him again tomorrow yo im Literally gonna beat some ass if he fucking dares try to talk to me #im NOT gonna put up with his bull fucking shit anymore im literally fuckign done #one word motherfucker. say one fucking word to me and im gonna cuss you the fuck out #dont think for a goddamn fucking second that i fucking wont

[jimines]

.

#this is just a little vent/update on some stupid shit going on on here regarding someone i won’t name #but i need to talk about it and vent bc im so frustrated at this whole thing #so i cut a friend off recently.. told them in a *very* heated message how i felt about all the terrible shit they'd said and done recently #and demanded they do not try to contact me anymore and blocked them immediately after #no surprise 5mins later i got two anons from them in my inbox trying to start a fight however i blocked the IP after those two #i even went so far as to disable my webpage for a few days to try and deter them both from sending anons and from stalking my page #and i shouldnt have had to unblock them to tell them for the second time to leave me alone and to stop trying to start things with me #because the last time we argued it was six weeks of emotional damage that i am still really messed up from #after all this it was radio silence - or so i thought #because i've received word now twice that this person has been saying untrue things to friends of friends #trying to start drama and rumours all because i cut them off and they didn't get that fight and that last word they so desperately need ? #i just…why? why why why? why does everything have to become a drama? this is why narcissists scare me.. #it took me over a year to realize thats what they are and that id been manipulated so fucking bad.. which is nothing short of embarassing #the way this anxiety has been weighing on my chest lately and dulling my time here is something that shouldnt be happening #im so so tired of all of it.. the drama and the fights and the rumours.. i physically cannot go through this kind of thing again #idk if anyone is reading this but im sorry for being so absent and unresponsive and (often times) really negative on my blog #its just so hard to be happy and positive and excited when this potential drama is looming over me day after day ya know? #im trying to push through and be here because i genuinely WANT to be here but its so fucking exhausting sometimes im constantly paranoid #i pray things will come to a rest and nothing will explode bc mentally i cannot take it anymore and i wont be sticking around in that case #i refuse to put myself through the emotional trauma that nicole put me through again. i REFUSE. so if i suddenly deactivate this is why. #but i wont be going down alone thats for sure #c.text

[czerwonywilk]

for this april fools i will stop fuckinf around and finish my wips

#tbh i woke up today with such a strong need to create something but spending time with relatives made me too tired #it's been some time since i made something outside of art therapy thingy #if i wont create anything soon ill explode

[autizta]

I never thought the day would come where I'd see a callout post on a dangerous individual in the Warrior Cats community and find my art being used as one of the individuals' supporters

#im so fucking mad im going to kiss my wife so i wont be so mad /ref #genuinely though i cant get it out of my head uggghhh #i wish i could do something but now knowing the user is in this community #known for doing things specifically with the intent of making others uncomfortable #and not caring for others comfort and enjoying seeing people upset #how am i gonna ask pretty please dont associate my art with x it makes me uncomfortable #how am i gonna defend myself without being at risk of getting a lot more directly attacked by these rabid freajs #freAks #explodes #blog