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#also yes i have a lot of pillows no i wont share any theres a very special order to my nest
micamone · 2 years
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this party's BYOB, pal
(bring your own blankie)
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Brushing and styling their hair after showering
Lucifer
First of all, it would be very hard to get him to comply
His pride will allow no such things
But for the sake of content lets say he lets you do it a few times after days of begging
He wouldnt want to admit it pridey mc' prideface but he actually loves it when you do this
It relaxes him a lot
Wont actually ask for you to do it, though, you'll have to bring it up again and maybe he'll allow it
Comb through his hair in front of a mirror, whisper sweet little praises as you do so and he'll subconsiously melt into you
If you dare speak of it though, he'll takeaway your hair styiling privelages
Mammon
Yes
Do it
Now
He will happily agree, if you promise to make it look good
If you style it well, then, congradulations, you've just got yourself a job as his personal hair stylist
Would definetly brag to his brothers that he got the MC to do his hair and now it look so much better than theirs
Leviathan
"Oh hell no"
Is what he thinks at first-
The thought of him, fresh out of the shower and you? Styling and drying his hair?
Doesnt this only happen in anime?
Would think he would somehow mess up even if theres nothing to mess up
But, after you reassure him, he'll comply
Absolutely beaming at the resoults
Doesnt matter if you totaly fucked up his hair or if it looks like something only a proffesional could do. He loves it either way
Satan
His answer depends on whether you have experience with it or not
Or so he says
He'll find a way to agree with any answer you give
You have experience? Sure, then he knows itll look good
You dont have experience? Then you can practice on him
He would get a book and read it to you while you style away
Also very happy with any resoults
Asmodeus
He's been waiting for this day since you arrived
No complaints or second thoughts, its you after all
Will ask to do yours as well
Will either have a specific request for his hair or just let you do what you want
"Im beutiful anyway, so it doesnt matter if you mess up . You cant mess up bad enough to make me look bad"
Beelzebub
Sure, if you can reach him
He'll offer to sit on the floor while you sit on a high chair so you can work comfortably
Also doesnt care how it turns out
Snack breaks. A lot of snack breaks.
Though hes just the sweetest little babe, he'll feel bad for getting up every minute or so for snacks
So, what does he do? Shares his food of course
Proud of you no matter what you do to his hair
Belphegor
No
Absolutely not
Its nap time after showers , not 'let MC style your hair for an hour' time
If you beg him enough and throw in a new pillow, he'll comply
Doesnt matter what you do, he doesnt care
Not that he doesnt take care of his hair or doesnt care if it looks bad- he just wants to sleep right now
A/N: this is probably bad, my brain has turned to mush as i have been writing this from 4:36 am- 5:09 am, so sorry lol
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savnofilter · 4 years
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Kinktober Day 9
Natsuo ➷ Midoriya ➷ Kirishima ➷ Fatgum ➷ Shinso  ➷ Tamaki ➷ Todoroki ➷ Bakugo ➷ Shindo ➷ Giran ➷  Dabi ➷ Shigaraki ➷ All For One 
☠️ warning(s): ⚠️ everything between both parties is consensual. ⚠️ 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕟𝕠𝕡𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕚𝕒, con/dubcon.
☠️ genre: smut, holiday special.
☠️ words: 260+ [about one minute each].
☠️ read more: kinktober(uary)
☠️ summary: instead of the original fic idea, i swapped it out with somnophilia hcs,,, enjoy.
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Natsuo (x)
giving:
wellllll since i dont know much about him i dont feel like he’s really into it. Up to your choices tbh.
feel like once on a blue moon he’ll wake up and decide he wants his dick in you like a thermometer or just finger you until you wake up.
isnt really something you guys discussed, he kinda just admired how beautiful you are.
if hes ever feeling freaky-deaky mayhaps he’ll eat you out,,,
he fucking loves it when you reciprocate his touches, it urges him to continue and tease you more. 
honestly just being able to pleasure you himself is what gets him rock hard, he doesnt even want anything in return he just wants to hear your sighs and moans.
natsuo's first just cause ion feel like it's something he does every day, more like once in a while just to tease you~
receiving:
to dooont talk about receiving --, hes a sucker for waking up with his pp in your mouth. 🤭
he likes to flex it when it's in, pushing you just a little lower just to hear you gag a bit. 
"Sorry babe, couldn't help myself~"
…. well thats aight with me-
isnt big on full-on making you choke on him but if you wake him with the glawk glawk 3000 he’ll have a brighter day. 
hes a Todoroki so just know he has the gene being a sadistic teaser. 
if you wake him up with cock warming he will literally marry you while he destroys your guts.
he likes somnophilia 11/10. 
Midoriya (x, x)
giving:
Midoriya is mostly timid, already having the consent talk between you two but hes still nervous.
oftentimes he just grinds up against you and keeps you close, but sometimes his hands do wander in other places.
when he first starts to experiment, he likes to soft kiss your neck and rubs his hips against you softly.
he might squeeze your breasts here and there to tease you, hands snaking under your shirt to feel your warm skin against his calloused and strong hands.
like headcanon before, Midoriya doesnt like to do penetration until he knows he has your full-on consent.
hes sweet but dont expect him to go full on soft with you lol. 
forbiddddddd Midoriya chooses oral because this boi will go for how long it takes his tongue to get tired. 
and thats not very easy. 
he loves to admire your body so most often he does it out of the,,, love he has. 🥴
and hes a closet perv too. 
receiving:
if you give it to him -- instant NUT. no cap. 
he'll be like "H-Honey" and then tense up and just nut.
but ofc being the good s/o you are, you still continue because youre a good s/o like that. 
bonus points if you treat him like hes a dirty perv for liking it, also gets on his subside if you really wanna degrade him too. 
some times when hes awake enough he can have the dom energy but most times her cant help but be a pillow prince for you~~
and he doesnt mind either. he enjoys it. there's something down inside him that just helps him sleep at night that you use him for your pleasure and his. 
there's just a whole lot to unwrap here. ;)
Kirishima (x)
giving:
hm.
to place Kirishima in third being hes the type to stay up like an hour after youve fallen asleep and stick his cock in you so he can feel you grind up against every few times throughout the night. 
gives you a few encouraging thrusts before he does fall asleep just to give your body a bit of a head start. 
wraps his arms around your waist to ensure you cant escape him. 😳
of course since he is like this, somnophilia has been discussed between you two so he's not on full on creep mode. 
sometimes he'll wake you up by just pounding into you at full send. 
likes to tease sensitive parts of your body just to get you to wake up,,, bites marks littered on your skin as well. 
hes careless and the only thing he is really focused on is? hes not sure. he just know he fucking loves doing it with you too. 
best part is when he records and then faps to the footage later-
but what can he do, he likes to cherish every moment you two share ~
receiving:
oh please wake him up like that. 
he has no qualms if its him in your mouth or you taking him inside you he just wants it. 
when you wake up him like that he honestly feels like maybe there is someone up there. 
is such a moaner. 
he likes it when youre a little rough too, cant help but be a masochist when he wakes up smh. 
if you ride him please let him choke on your fingers -- better yet have your ass face his direction so he can do whatever he wants with your lower parts as well. 
even when you are giving he still wants to reciprocate as well, he loves to have your pleasured whenever you two get busy.
most times when you engage in somnophilia it has to be days when he has off. why? he might just go all day. 
pleasure him, but do it wisely. 🤧
Fat gum (x)
giving:
taishiro is the type of guy to like put his dick in your mouth lol. 
not even like get you slicked up or anything, just cock in mouth. 
probably gets you semi undressed before he gropes you like a creep, getting his cock hard before opening your sleeping mouth and slipping his dick into your mouth.
makes you choke on his cock to wake you up, enjoying it when you dont have time to hide your gag reflex and watch as you try and get use to his tip pressing at the back of your throat. 
half of the time, taishiro doesnt even wake you up. he plays with you just to get you wet and stinky.
sometimes he diddles himself and cums on you just to have you confused when you wake up. 
honestly beats Midoriya at being a closet pervert, but does he really try to hide it?
receiving:
hmmmmmm
he doesnt really care to receive it. 
sure it's a very nice surprise to wake up to but he prefers it when hes the one playing with you. 
likes it better if youre taking him with one of your lower holes just because he already has enough experience with your mouth wrapped around his cock. 
if riding him manages to wake him up, teasing him wont go on for any longer. he has no choice but to take over and just ran your brains out. 
when hes done flipping the script and you both are satisfied you more out of shape than him, he'll be like,
"Welp, crepe for breakfast?"
Shinso (x)
giving:
oral central
i cant think of shinso having his ding-ding be the first thing to tease you when you wake up with fingers and oral. no and's, no but's. 
he doesnt like to rush you up on waking up, more with the smooth process and it isnt really doing it for a reaction.
he just wants to toy with you.
honestly, like fat gum he does it so youre usually in a confused state when you wake up. horny but not knowing why and knowing full-well you didnt have a wet dream either. 
its not until a few more times of him doing it is when you realize it's his doing and that in itself has you in a blushing mess. 
not expecting that from him at all but not complaining. 😳
sometimes you dress just a little provocatively just to inspire him~
receiving:
if you dont wake him up with his cock in your mouth hes gonna have a bad day. >:(
jk, he respecs wamen. 
deadass do it once and he might just marry you. 
if youre doing a little under par from what you usually do, he'll just have to nudge yah a lil, push you on, use his quirk. 
"Fuck -- just like that kitten~"
WELL DAMN IF YOU DIDNT WANT TO SUCK THE SOUL OUT OF HIM ALREADY-
he doesnt really care if you wake him up like that, much appreciated but he doesnt really care. 
i mean if you do, just get ready for an early morning of face fucking… just saying. 
Tamaki (x)
giving:
yall aint ready for this one. 
some people may say, 'aw tamaki would wake up s/o and just cuddle her to death uwu<3", while yes he will, dont underestimate him.
to think of him in somnophilia is where we break the closet pervert ends. 
hes more of like, i really like my dick and i really like you so i’ll just go on and fuck you awake.
theres on lead up or anything, he’ll full on give you brain or just fuck you as if you are awake, apologising profusely once you do wake up.
“I-I’m s-sorry to wake you like this… I couldn’t help myself…”
he’ll never fully use quirk on you while you sleep though. thats a big nope from him.
when he sexs you up he wants it to be fully him… and only him.
(i mean its his quirk from him -- but you get the point!)
CEO of going till ya numb.
his favorite his sticking his dick into you and rutting into you like a dog in a rut. 
definitely is a groper. cannot and will not convince me otherwise.
he just really loves it when you moan out for him and make cute noises~ its all he needs to start off for a good day.
receiving:
well, it definitely is a pleasant surprise.
doesnt affect him like he does when he wakes you up but he appreciates your efforts.
most times when hes conscience enough he’ll just take over as if you werent trying to surprise him before.
honestly if youre looking for an early pounding thats the best time and way to get him into action.
since he sees it as teasing he cant help but have to pay you back.
he’ll be straight up clapping dem cheeks and he’ll just be like “you feel so fucking good” with the nicest sounding moan anyone can mumble into your ear.
yeah…. I encourage doing it to him. 
gets him nice and possessive giving you both a good time while he can live out his lil dom fantasies for the day.
//win win.
Todoroki (x, x)
receiving:
hes like a blushing mess.
if you couldnt see him as a sub before, well get ready for this.
catch him off guard and guarantee youll get a completely different Shouto.
he turns into a full on pillow prince, with no shame. As long as you focus on getting him off he’ll let you do what he wants.
if you especially focus on his soft spots that dont have to do with his nipples or the third leg between his legs that when youll get him puddy under your hands.
“Y-Y/N..~”
well shit, say your name like that and he might make you revert submissive behaviour too.
you treat him like a perfect lil’ prince whenever he does, wanting to pamper him anyways.
on a rare chance could you spark him into flipping the tables but thats more on a random occurrence more than anything.
note to self: sub Sho? surprise him.. ✍️
Bakugo (x, x)
giving: 
this one is kindaaaa tricky.
now, Katsuki wont do it often. but when he does it, he does it with uhh,,,, passion. if you would like to call it that.
he mimics all the spots you loved to be touched when youre awake just to see how long it takes for your body to wake up and realize that hes playing with you.
calculated in his actions, obviously. hes not some idiot who rushes, everything he does is precise whether or not you know it.
because of this, being able to please you is easy so his clear motive? not very sure….
maybe it's to see you squirm and wake up? mayhaps to see what pure pleasure looks like written over your face. who knows, all you knew is that he always had a smug look on his face when he was able to make you cum by the end of it. 
thats if…. he let you that is.
receiving:
sort of like Todoroki, you may just get him to be the whole bottom in the term, "power bottom". 
tries to hold in moans and groans but usually fails which makes him sooooo frustrated. 
if he gets too flustered he'll make you stop and give whatever you have him by tenfold. 
brace yourself for a long and bumpy ride, you may have to do it on days he isnt going to work that day because he'll sure rock you out of this world. 
best if done on holidays as well, itll leave you walking a lil awkward for a few days. 
and of course, that isnt okay for being on the job is it?
Shindo (x)
giving: 
ddjhvbjhvb
hes this high on the list for a reason.
ongggggggg he’ll tease the ever living shit out of you until he gets bored or decides youve earned it.
damn snarky wont even prep your body or anything, just straight out the cut uses his quirk just to get your senses all riled up. 
does everything on the scale of full on senses to just barely touching you. 
his teasing always wakes you up into a confused state that is wanting to more, shamelessly begging for him to continue.
he carries great pride in taking responsibility in getting you like this. but dont be mistakened! he will not go easier on you just because you woke up. 
you had only just felt the pre-course to the real action~
buckle up, kitten. 
receiving:
nope. if youre going to take advantage of him, he wants to fully aware. 
… for sadistic reasons more than consensual. 
Giran (x)
giving:
this old fucking man. 
likes to sneak in and just feel you up good. 
of course he doesnt want through his back out so yknow- im just kidding. 
giran will go to town if he has to. 
but most times, the old fart just loves to, "make love" to his darling. 
calls you sweet petnames in your ear as you sleep, just so you can dream about you too. 
he knows how to tease and play with you. he can finish the job without even so much as stirring you awake. 
hes studied you long enough and has played with you enough to make you finish as well. 
it's magic honestly, and his best part is leaving you with the mess between your legs and nothing but confusion written all over your face. 
how could he know that's your reaction although he leaves before you can wake up? 
simple. hes always has his ways~
receiving:
the few rare times he let's you into his humble abode is when you decide to treat him. 
really adament of sucking him off to wake him up just to see his early morning smile. 
him rewarding you with giving you the same treatment or dirty praise is all you need before you leave and act as if you werent sleeping around with a villain recruiter and his #1 sugar baby for that matter. 
when you surprise him in his study is the real kicker. 
youve been under his desk many times to be familiar with the spot and assume the position. 
you usually bring up breakfast or dinner (whichever time you arrive) and wake him up in the good way that motivates him to continue on with his stressful job.
surely, he can never thank you enough. if it wasnt for your efforts, he wouldnt know how to deal with himself~
Dabi (x, x)
giving:
✨ rise n shine, dabi's fat cock is here to wake you up. ✨
this asshole -- this asshole. 
has no shame at all. he knows full well what hes doing. 
likes to feel you up and just feel at you sometimes. hes so touch starved that he cant even help it. 
he ranges from teasing you till you wake up to full-on fucking your brains out. 
of course he enjoys it when youre confused but wanting more, your body more than ready to receive his hands. 
at some point, you just like to tease him for it too. usually he catches onto your game and plays accordingly. 
he cant help but feel blessed that someone he loves so very much could enjoy the same interests he does as well. 
just let him know you like it when he feels you up and he'll give it to you anytime you ask~
receiving:
would not recommend unless you want early-morning-face fucking.
like you wouldnt catch someone wake up from something like that faster than Dabi. 
you may wonder why, it's just his touch starved nature. im telling you, it responds to anything. 
no matter what position, how you do it you will get a positive reaction from him. 
tell me you cant imagine him moaning, "that's it, doll~ swallow my cock like the slut you are~"
IN A SLEEPY RASPY VOICE??? HELLO 🤧
this man is just a walking breathing example of what the word simp feels like. 
youre supposed to turn away because hes not the type of guy to fall in love with but most times like this is when you cant help it..
Shigaraki (x, x)
giving:
master diddler, yes he is. 
hes the type to not even stick his cock in, just like hump at you like a needy animal and just mark up your neck as if he hasnt had sex in years. 
is the type to use other parts of your body to get off just to avoid pleasuring you as he gets off.
youll wake up to his cum in various spots. between your legs, on your chest and even your armpits. if it has a place where his cock can fit its going there.
he doesnt give a shit if you fuss about it later, “why didn’t you cum inside” headass.
youll have to earn him using you like cocksleeve the proper way.
youre either a heavy sleeper or light because you can wake up as soon as he starts or wake up after hes done.
Either way, as long as he can see the pureness on your expression is all he needs to help his perverse needs.
Shigaraki isnt the person to use you during your sleep without having at least talked it with you.
yeah hes a creep but hes not that weird.
likes to whisper degrading stuff into your ear when you sleep just so you can dream about what hes doing to you, his hands not stopping a moment as he gets off to feeling you up.
just dont expect anything less then degenerate from him 
receiving:
you have to be a special type of breed to even think about touching him without him being in control.
the thought of you possibly being able to one-up him is a no-no.
he wont allow it.
if he even senses you thinking about it he’ll stir awake and glare at you as if there is no tomorrow.
but say you do manage to catch him off guard, this may be the only times you can really edge a moan out of him of.
so use your time wisely.
All for one (x)
giving:
ive said it once, i'll say it again. 
you just have no rights bro. im sorry. 
he wakes him sometimes and just goes, "this bitch deserves a rude awakening today". 
like okay mr fuckface. 
is the one that is always on x games mode, no softness for him at all.  
probably has you wear those kitten/mitten collar things like*cough cough* kakegurui *cough cough* even when youre carrying out errands for him. 
the point is honestly to keep you in place, and you cant help but like it anyways. 
some may dislike being viewed as a pet or anything less but you love it hence why you stay. 
plus, if you could runaway, would you be able to?
nevermind that, you didnt want someone else to replace you so youll stay his obedient bitch for now.. 😌
receiving:
you wouldnt. you just wouldnt.
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Day 56 - 62
This has been a hard one. So you know how Ramadan is the month you fast and al and your supposed to strengthen your spirituality and all. Well Ramadan went well Alhamdulillah but it is more like all these things happened to me this one week more compared to during Ramadan. 
So I started walking on the treadmill. I planned on 2 hours a day but ended up doing one hour everyday. Well when i decided on 2hrs it was what i ‘preferred’. 1hr, duh, is the ‘minimum’ and more than 2 hours is highly appreciable but im still proud i could at least do the bare minimum this week yay! well proud is exaggeration tbh, im just not panicking and depressed  because I maintained the bare minimum but im not like ‘happy’ or impressed cause I dont see any progress. But then again, the way i define ‘progress’ is kind of too high standard as always so yeah I am kind of harsh on myself ‘as always’ again so maybe I am kinda doing okay i guess. well but bottom line, im not really ‘impressed’. 
Aha ok so theres that. then um oh! me catching cold after coming from Makkah, Well in the beginning i was sooooo tired for a day or two like i couldnt function at all. But then yeah all the classic symptoms started to arise. coughing, sneezing, throat irritation, blocked nose, runny nose, greenish sputum, difficulty breathing. Oh God, you name it! so I have been on medication for a week now and I have to continue for another 1 week. And its just not going away yet. like its there, constant! except for just last night when my throat wasnt itching much and luckily i could sleep like a babyyyyyyyyy for a change after a week. Oh so this whole week I used to go to bed around 12 to 1 or at 2 latest! Now whether I could fall asleep is a different story. Well most of the nights I did try to fall asleep like till fajr and i could like sleep for an hour or 2 max and then I would just wake up from coughing so much. and then Id just lie down till fajr and then get up and pray and then go to bed. 2 of the mornings I worked out after fajr and then took a shower and then slept around 7 in the morning. 
during the day, well i wake up always keeping in mind that I should not miss zuhr so lol that mean i kinda wake up usually around 2pm or even later sometimes. Since im talking about the entire week, this is like what i did majority of the days. Some days i woke up earlier though. but maybe thats like a day or 2 out of 7.  So its so hot during the day, like you dont even need to ‘move’ and youll already be sweating! I totally hate it and I have never been that tired of any weather ugh. Like I totally love winter now. not cause idk its fun or something but like i hate summer so muchhhhhhh that yeah i can basically go like i love winter 
Ok so the week kinda started with me being kind of tired mentally. parents were in the middle of a huge argument so yeah the whole atmosphere in the house was kinda blue and then I started eating so less and then starting with the treadmill and all and well it was just a bit tough to move from a phase to another. I wasnt having negative vibes and all but i just wished for more from life. I mean sometimes it is kind of too much to take. I get all the stuff about life not supposed to be perfect and how it is just temporary and how we should not get attached to worldly things. Yes all of that is cool and i get it but then when you are actually experiencing those ‘downs’ in life, youre obviously not going to be ‘okay’ with it and ofcourse youll wish things were better or youd just feel mentally drained out - despite knowing the entire “concept” of life - 
So yeah thats the phase I was in for a few days and then after a lot of thinking how I suddenly got out of the phase was when I was thinking about how every single person is subjected to life is a completely different way. Like you can never compare. You might think your life is horrible and so much shit has happened to you and everything and maybe someone else who never had to face anything similiar to the ‘shit’ you went through. Well maybe they had to experience something else. Something you are too blessed to even be aware of. What I am trying to say is how sometimes we wish for things is life and other people have it, that what you want. Or maybe they dont have what you want, but then in general it seems like there life seems ‘happier’ than yours. Well I dont really think it is true anymore. I kind of think everyone goes through almost an equal share of good and bad. and how do we define what is ‘good’ and what is ‘bad’? Well we just cant tbh. Because what might seem good to me and I would wish for could be something someone has and feels cursed with. I mean its all about perceptions. So someone maybe suffering in their own way but you are not just seeing it. Basically the point is, 
We should always be thankful, be patient and keep breathing. We should be aware of how our life is not going to be a compilation of scenes you get to watch in movies or be picture perfect. And we also need to protect ourselves from getting attached to anything or anyone so much! We need to be okay with letting go of things or people if we ever have to! And we also need to know that every single person out there ~ Everyone’s life is perfectly imperfect. Yes, of course I cant really disagree to how some people might seem to have better lives but then again, all the hardships you go through, you are being tested and you are being rewarded for them so at the end of the day it all balances off. 
So I was kind of really bored with life in general and also my days were boring too. Well theyre still pretty much boring but like i was also bored of life. Then I started thinking of certain people who are having more boring lives than mine, and who dont even have the blessings I am gifted with. And everything started to just get more acceptable. And then I started thinking of my brother. I mean its so cool he is going to move to Canada in like less than 2 months inshaAllah and all. I am really happy for him and wish nothing but the best of the best for him and all but but but.. I mean just think of it. At first I was thinking of my some of the people Ik who arent really in a pretty place maybe because of financial reasons. Then there were people that came to my mind who arent in a pretty place because of just family reasons. And then ones who are just simply having to work a bit harder and so theyre not at a pretty place. Some who are away from friends, family because of life. So yeah. then I started thinking of my brother. I mean he is going to move soon and he will be living in a dorm and I mean he will be in Canada in one of the top 5 universities in the country and he has a scholarship. MashAllah that all sounds so great. Something Id want too but but but. then i started thinking of life in general. I mean he will be living on his own. He doesnt have to cook though, he has subscribed to a meal plan so he doesnt have to worry about preparing his food. but like living alone in his dorm room. I mean coming home every day to his room. Well cool thing though he wont be sharing a room with anyone and he will have his own toilet and stuff but then again, i mean he will be alone. Im not saying that an alternate scenario could be one where hed come home to his family and woah everyone would be partying and laughing and smiling and all. I mean even when he is at home right now he is like always in front of his computer busy with his own stuff and all but like idk Id still prefer coming home and having some other humans who are family. Atleast once in a while you know. or maybe its just me. but then still, i mean uni and studies are stressful enough, id just want to see people i love around! And yeah that is one of the main reasons why I didnt finally decide to study abroad right after high school! 
So yeah then I started realizing that there are so many ways I already am blessed. Even on every one of my ‘boring’ days, there are blessings i am encountering which many people arent getting even on their normal days. Yeah that kind of cheered me up! 
So this week, more like this month or like the entire 2 months will be about my bro lol. I mean theres a lot of shopping to do. like clothes, toilet stuff, laundry stuff, bed, pillow, shoe, laptop, tootpaste, mug, spoon and what not. literally everything. I mean its actually fun. Like you go to a shop and literally anything you touch, is something in the shopping list for him!! i mean normally somethings are like just too basic, youd never in years touch them in a shop cause like you have it, its there!!! but for him, have to get everything since he will start from scratch! 
Ok so now about myself! Well like i said, the week started pretty rough because of the whole change in phase. parents fighting, me not eating much considering how food is one of the means by which i look for comfort, and then life just being boring in general and then how getting on the treadmill is such a pain in the ass in the first place and not to mention the extremely hot temperature these days and then you dont really see any difference. I mean duh. DUHHHHH howd i even be thinking to see any difference? I mean i KNOWWW its too soon for any difference but like all these staying patient emotionally, mentally about so many different aspects in life..It all can get pretty heavy sometimes!!!! Oh and then its like i really really really love myself. Like a LOT LOT. now like i said, once you already love someone, I mean, well, to fall in love ofcourse the person needs to have good qualities most of the time but then like once you already love someone, you love them despite their imperfections. Well, thats how you love ‘another person’. but when you love yourself. Forget qualities!!! you love yourself regardless lol! Where I am getting with this is!!! I mean right now, i really am not AT ALL happy with my body, like not. at . ALL. Infact I have never been this unhappy about my body ever in my life. And also I kind of feel really dumb. Like wow, Alhamdulillah whatever I did in my exams and all, i am thankful for that but like as a person in general. I really dont feel smart enough plus I literally dont remember anything i studied. like i actually wonder how tf did are they just not there in my head anymore. Like i definitely did study them or else i wouldnt pass my exams so now where the hellllll did all that go awaaayyyyy whatttttttttt
yeah so 4th year basically you need to know your shit. like you actually need to know what they taught you in the last 3 years. like youre actually be walking with doctors and interacting with them one on one. its not going to be like the last 3 years where like it doesnt really matter whether you are alive or dead, asleep or awake. like you just make sure you have your name signed. so theres the attendance part covered. and you make sure you finish every lecture and to do that you have time till before you enter the “exam code” on your laptop and start the exam!!!! You see, now! you actually need to know shit, you actually need to go see patients with the doctors and even without the doctors, you need to go to patients, and take history from them which TADAAA will be in arabic. oh wow!! So yeah if you dont know arabic you need a friend/ translator! yeah and then you need to tell your history to your doctor in english thank god lol :p but like yeah, and you ll be in small groups of 6 - 10 with a doctor and like he might bring up a disease he wants to discuss and SURE af it wont be something they found out about 2 minutes ago. ofcourse it will be something we are expected to have covered in the last 3 years or uni and you cant just go like. OH I never heard about it!!!! Idk what it is!!! Ok lol i guess im freaking out now. 
Anyways so what i was saying. yeah so not happy with my body, plus i think im really dumb and then its just TOO DAMN HOT i cant do anything, I CANT EVEN MOVE. so yeah its pretty disturbing! Also not to mention how not eating much is so hard Ughh! 
Ok so i have been typing for over an hour now. I kind of think I covered everything I wanted to blog about for the whole week but like Im not sure and I dont want to read all what i wrote right now cause its already so boring cause its like always in my head anywaysssss and yeah thats one nice thing about blogging. Ahh. like once i hit the ‘post’ button and then woah!!! all these thoughts just turn into feather in my head!!!!! hahaahh!! 
But i still do read what i write again everytime, prolly at the end of the day to make sure nothing is ‘misunderstood or sounds completely opposite of what I actually wanted to say and all. blablaaa. So yeah if somethings mssing, ill fill it up
okay enough blabbering. Tataa!!!!!! :) 
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