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blerb-f1 · 3 months

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"The Future" - Sebastian Vettel x reader

The news truly shocked me and compelled me to write this.

Lewis Hamilton is a side character in this.

not proofread i dont have the mental capacity rn

This fic also is kinda part of a series, but it can stand on it's own! For more, view my masterlist.

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“Have you considered it at least?”

A fragmented voice sounding through a tin-like phone speaker asked with a certain pressure behind it. The kind of pressure you’d only hear from people who wanted something. Something important.

Sebastian eyed the phone hesitantly, placing it on the windowsill while holding his watering can. Little droplets sliding down it’s side as he attempted to water his dried pot of basil - traveling was never something that helped in plantkeeping, not when you’d spend half the year in random hotels somewhere in the world.

He did not feel the need to return to the circus known as Formula 1, having enjoyed his time there but entirely content with retirement. Opposed to some of the others, he thought, he knew when to quit. No longer circling the biggest cities on earth but the supermarket parking lot in hopes of finding an empty spot. More importantly, waking up in his own bed for 7/7 days a week was a major joy to him, a feeling he didn’t feel like giving up.

“You know as well as i do, that we need an experienced driver. George’s good but… He just can’t give us the direction needed.” Toto sounded quite serious at that moment - Lewis deciding to leave must have hurt him badly, considering him approaching Sebastian.

“Also… I just want someone i can trust to be around me”

Looking up in surprise, Seb almost dropped the watering can on the floor. Lewis leaving had REALLY hurt him.

“I’ve been thinking about retiring from F1 now. But they’d probably cancel F1 Academy without me around. Force Susie into Submission. I don’t want that. Fuck no.”

“Toto, I-” Sebastian started speaking, plucking the dead leaves from his pot of basil. “I like life. I love peaceful mornings.”

Silence. The phone speaker didn’t echo out for a few moments.

“What would you say, if i told you we had a championship winning car?”

—-----------------------------------------------

“You really agree to it?” Sebastian asked, Surprise lingering on his voice.

“Of course i do, i’ve seen you thirst for racing while you yourself didn’t. I was with you from the beginning till the end of your career, don’t you think i’d be able to read you by now?” Y/N answered him, their eyebrows pulled together in a mild emotion.

“But there’s a catch.”

“Yes?”

“I’ll be your race engineer. Like i’ve always been”

“Huh?” Seb asked again, this time even more surprised than before. Y/N nodded seriously. “I can’t see you race with another Engineer at your side. It feels wrong.”

The man man pondered for a moment, his brain racking. “You’re right. I’ll talk to Toto.”

A week later, Mercedes made an announcement. For the 2025 season, Bono would be moving to the lead Race Engineer position, not being directly responsible for a single racer. The community was confused, unsure of what was happening. Would they be promoting a rookie racer and engineer to grow their youth? Would they be getting a driver and engineer paring from another team?

Twitter and Reddit Artists were working hard, creating shitpost after shitpost, pundits podcast over podcast as the season progressed, trying to figure out who’d be the next racer.

Meanwhile Sebastian and Y/N were busy in their own ways. Practicing their communication again, the driver getting physically fit and in shape again. Moreso than he had been during his time at Aston Martin. This was going to be serious - no more lazing around. Go hard or go home.

Y/N worked with Bono - the man they used to work against- to get used to the Mercedes way of communication. It was very difficult, more strict compared to the free Red Bull. More lenient compared to the crazy Ferrari. More rule governed, compared to Aston Martin. Peter Bonnington was surprised in his own way, understanding why L/N and Vettel were the scary Duo they had been all this time. They had been a team since 2008, their shared time rivaling his and Lewis. Lewis- that was a mental direction he shouldn’t go to. Mercedes would need to win the championship, no time to waste on stupid thoughts.

As the season progressed and Fans grew mad with their speculation, Mercedes made a post on their instagram. It was a Photo of one of the trees outside their HQ, with a little bee fluttering around it. One single Description. “We love nature”.

Fans went wild with speculation, thinking, planning, shitposting.

Then one day, two weeks away from the season beginning, the news fell. Two announcement posts in a single day. Y/N L/N heading to Mercedes as Race Engineer, Sebastian Vettel as driver. Mercedes returning back to their silver arrows livery.

The community went wild, the thing they’d never expected had happened.

Lewis meanwhile, was downtrodden. He had expected this move to work out differently. Ferrari clearly designated Charles as Driver 1, not adjusting around him like he’d gotten used to. Their bad race engineering got him into trouble many times. Seeing this news almost broke him. They had replaced him with his friend, who didn’t speak a single word of this? Shame on him.

Shortly after, a Video went online on the Mercedes Account. Sebastian and Y/N were seated among the many championships belonging to Mercedes, clad in white teamgear. Their eyes were determined, telling people they hadn’t arrived to play. As Sebastian took of his hat, people noticed the change. His own cold smile had returned, the one that caused people to call him a smiling assassin. His locks short again, like when he’d won his own championships. Y/N had assimilated, they’re hair bleached and dyed into a silvery colour.

Fans once again were shocked, they truly hadn’t expected Sebastian to return like this. More akin to the way Schumacher returned but apparently that was not the choice Vettel made - he was here to win, not for the participation trophy.

As the season opener in Australia rolled around, many eyes were glued to the screen. Y/N was sitting on a bicycle along with their driver on his own, passing over the track. Taking in texture, dirt and heat. The media approached them back in the pits, shoving microphones in their face. Y/N just grunted, showing the media a literal middle finger before dipping into the Mercedes pitwall.

This was the same paring as back in 2011, ready to fight. Qualifying went well, dangerously well. It was as if Seb hadn’t left F1. But not the 2022 Version, the 2012 Version. His defense was ruthless, his attacks even more. He utilised all the skills he had honed over years, even the smallest tricks Michael had once explained to him to gain a faster time. As he crossed over the finish line in first position, Martin Brundle screamed out loud. Nobody had expected this, nobody thought he could win a race again. Toto was jumping in the Mercedes Garage, Y/N jumping along and almost throwing the headset down.

Sebastian on the radio was back to his own, singing, cheering and screaming absolute gibberish. Pulling into Parc Fermé, he was surprised at having the camera and microphone pushed into his face. This new way of doing things was very unusual to him.

“So Sebastian, tell us how you’re feeling.”

“I feel like i belong” was his simple answer, pushing the camera out of his face as he headed to get weighed. He took a short look at the staircase leading up to the podium. It had been a while since he had last set foot onto them. They were almost scary but he knew, he was secure. A hand placed on his shoulder, one that he had felt there for many years. Y/N was there to get the constructors trophy, truely the only appropriate person today.

The clothing wasn’t the same as in the past, but the energy was. People were cheering, even more were booing. Not wanting another Era of Mercedes Dominance. Booing however, did nothing to deter Sebastian or Y/N. After all, they were the original Red Bull Villains.

Ignoring the rules, they let the champagne down to the team to enjoy. This was their first victory after a few years as well, they deserved it after sacrificing two seasons to get this car made.

Then, a lone camera man captured an almost painfull view. Lewis Hamilton, clad in the strong Ferrari Red standing aside, looking up to the silver team with sadness and longing in his eyes. This hurt him, it truly did. Tears were welling in his eyes as the camera man moved away tactfully, instead capturing the celebrating couple instead.

The season progressed, a grandslam in all eyes. Win after win - not a single Race lost. As the Final in Bahrain rolled around and Sebastian collected his fifth driver’s championship, he knew he had found a new family and home. Y/N and him were celebrating wildly, the basil on the windowsill long forgotten among the glory and the parties, the heat and the energy.

It was that day, that a man entered a plane back to his new home in Italy. Eying the still not fully unpacked furniture, he settled onto a lightly dusted chair. Had leaving Mercedes truly not been the right decision? Lewis looked at a photobook a fan had gotten him. From winning with McLaren, the years with Nico and Valtteri, Mercedes had truly grown into his home and Family. What had made him leave them then? Was it the thirst for glory? Had he not enjoyed the atmosphere anymore? He felt conflicted. People had told him that Ferrari would break him. He didn’t want to believe them, but they were right. The red team had once again done what it did best. Destroy someone. Lewis looked back on Sebastian’s Face, remembering his defeated expression after the years of fighting with the red team. Of getting recognition for Kimi as well. Of standing up against Charles.

Lewis considered his options, putting his own life on the golden scale. Then, he made a decision. Opening instagram, he made a single post. Cuddling Roscoe, the description was simple, something nostalgic almost. “I hereby announce my retirement from Formula 1”

#blerb writes #f1 x reader #sebastian vettel x reader #sebastian vettel x you #lewis hamilton #nonbinary!reader

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circuscountdowns · 3 months

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Hi! Wanted to start off by saying that I LOVE your cotl art its such a huge inspiration to me :D! I recently picked up drawing again and I've unfortunately been upset? envious?! of others' skills and just wanted to ask if you ever experienced this as a fellow artist and if so how do you not do that lol. Sorry for the weird question. I just thought some insight and advice from a fellow artist could helo. BUT I hope you still have a nice day and look forward to any more cotl art or anything you draw really :D!!! (also is okay if you don't answer it is a loaded question I just be in a silly goofy mood lately okay bye!)

oh wow being on the receiving end of a question like this is surreal, I’m honored my work inspires you! Thank u, you’re sweet, it’s not a loaded question at all! Here’s my long reply sorry

so unfortunately that comparing yourself to others thing doesn’t go away ever asdfgjkl. I suffer it every day, it sucks, feels bad. I’ve had industry people tell me they feel this way and they’ll have some of the most gorgeous visdev/boards/animation I’ve ever seen. Disheartening to hear, But! I’m a big believer that comparing your artworks with others is best used as a tool and not a punishment to yourself!

When looking at art you like, try to turn thoughts of, “Man I wish my stuff looked like that, my shit sucks,” to, “What is it that I like about this piece? The line art? The perspective?” Sometimes I’ll see work with thin line art and I’ll get an itch, and I’ll draw something with thin line art. It’s a conscious effort of keepin emotion out of that itch, keeping it as, “I saw art with thin lines, I want to do that. Yay I did that!” Compartmentalize it, the itch was simply to do thin line work, not to remake the piece you were inspired by. And you got a piece of art out of it, and a single piece is progress no matter how small!

If you want to compare, do it methodically! Why does my work look different (never use the words better or worse)! Oh, I see my piece doesn’t follow the rule of thirds, so the framing is different, I’ll be aware of that next time if it bothers me. Or, Oh I see they shade by hatching along with the form, I’ve just been going horizontally, I’ll try that other way!

it’s a learning curve of training yourself, like all corrective behavior.

like, I kinda have the warning feeling of dread when I’m about to compare my work with something, so before the self-deprecating thought can even start I have to think What do I Like about this?

I’m no expert at it, though. Actually getting myself to think this way is a struggle, but I find when I make Thoughtful Observations I level up. Not by a lot most times, but yknow.

and this part is just my personal experience:

Fanart and the internet can be the biggest Art skill killer sometimes. Get offline and cater to the audience that Really matters to your passion: You! I improved the most by spending 2-3 years doing doodles/comics/models for my dnd campaign ocs because I was that obsessed and I simply wanted to have it for me!

and after all that, then there’s the hardest skill of just accepting your work as is.

like, to me, my work is just scribbles. I see other artists’ stuff and go “Man they’re so good at comics and colors, man, why can’t I color?” But do I need to??? I don’t like coloring, do I need to be good at it? This isn’t a career, this is supposed to be fun! I scribble because I like it! I’m glad this persons good at coloring, I don’t need to be! Yay!

if I Want to be good at it, I’ll take the steps to get there! But if not, my scribbles are just fine :) I love black and white and values

I’ve been having that one on repeat for a while. It helps

(acceptance and denial go hand in hand btw lol they sound the same)

I wish there was a little off button for envy, but ah well! I hope that you take comfort in knowing we are all feeling it, and find joy in even the smallest little doodle you make! Have fun stay goofy!

#I wrote this in part so it might be a rambly mess.#I have a difficult relationship with art after 5 years of college for it. Cotl has been helping me find ways to love art again.#ty for liking my work!

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eatmangoesnekkid · 3 months

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My Second Belly Dance Teacher and Friend

I am compassionately twirling out of Germany on the train making my way back to Amsterdam to see my 2nd belly dance teacher. Yes I am blessed to have 2 teachers because each one teaches differently and I get to develop a more dynamic practice. I had homework to do on my side belly waves and shimmies 🧘🏿‍♀️🌊 and she will test me this evening. Germany is definitely not my country🤣🤣 but I love giving love and care, one of the prime roles of a lover archetype in practice. Being a lover isn’t just about dancing, playing, art, music, sex, nature, animals, or loving your way through this reality, it is a real care practice, as I see all of the above as ways we care for others. I do believe that an embodied belly dancer could dance and her sacred dance would bring back the eyesight of a blind person who gets to witness her, to feel her…in their heart. Feeling is always key. In my travels, I sense how she could journey around the world and heal ailments in the bodies of weaker or compromised people through her belly waves and breast rotations—that pure kundalini innocence. Because when a person sees/feels/perceives a beautiful, lighthearted, open-hearted woman (one who is holding pain/hurt in her heart/spirit) and interacts with her in the slightest way, their body naturally releases chemicals called “endorphins” that cause them really feel good and even healthier and more powerful or capable. These lost forbidden arts I hope to revive and reclaim in my lifetime and I see myself getting to that place in my heart one day. When people think of Oshun, they tend to omit two of her most important skills-her ability to care for the sick and her warrior aspects, but we must remember that it's either all of it or none of it. ☀️

I do believe that it’s important as you learn these medicinal arts that are not only medicine for others, but medicine for your own mind, body, and spirit—whether you learn on YouTube or with a teacher, you 'womb' yourself and don’t blast on social media right away. I see women do this as well when they start a new work out program. Embody your practice first then share or you may find that you dilute your progress and become stagnant because social media tends to take us away from our heart and its purity of passion to embark on a new skill or habit imperfectly, and drown us in our ego and its need for constant approval and addiction to comparing and contrasting. This was a big learning for me that the ancestral mothers whispered. Much of social media emanates a frequency of disembodiment —pretending to be embodied. Some of the most vibrant, brilliant, and embodied artists, dancers, writers, and singers I adore like Sade and Tracy Chapman don’t have a social media presence. They lead private lives and create in the dark, in mystery and silent ritual. They aren't under the constant bombardment of notifications, distractions, or stress nor operate with the common "text-neck" which malnourishes the female body and blocks the lymphatic pathways from detoxifying the face, upper back, and shoulders, the death-grip to more wrinkles (however beautiful, merely sharing for Aunties who buy toxic anti-aging cremes), and neck, shoulder, and back inflammation/pain. More than the fact that these women are aging backwards as a result of their private lifestyles and the accompanying incontrovertible power, there is benevolent advanced intelligence in the quiet, whether you are creating books or music or dilating your hips in a new dance practice or abductor workout regiment. While in the learning curve or creative process, discretion and care are needed.

Having an audience occasionally cheer on your progress can be a nice feeling due to the quick dopamine hit but it can easily become like a drug and it matters more that you see yourself and believe in you. “Giving birth” is multidimensional, multidisciplinary, and not something that everyone should be privy to seeing. Eventually you openheartedly share your gift, but not in the early or mid-developmental stages. And yes feeling stronger in your body from the discipline (and sometimes discomfort of) working out is also a gift that you give to this world.

This life is so temporary and we all asked to be here so be here fully grounded in your feet, legs, and hips and overflowing in your gifts. Embody the art. Midwife the dancer. Share the baby when it’s time. Mm, One loveliness 🫀🫀🫀🫀

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thenerdyindividual · 1 year

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Consider Participating in Fandom Trumps Hate

Do you create fanworks for BBC Merlin? Do you wish there were more fanworks for BBC Merlin? Do you wish you could get your favorite fanartist, fic writer giffer, podficcer, or other fan creator to make a thing specifically for you? Do you wish you had a way to raise money for progressive charities and programs, or were better about donating to those causes yourself?

Consider getting involved with Fandom Trumps Hate. It’s a fan charity auction in which fan creators sign up to offer a work as a thank you gift. Whoever bids the most on that thank you gift donates that offering directly to one of the supported organizations, and then gets a custom thank you gift in return.

Do you want your favorite artist to draw Gwen as knight? Do you wish there were more fics out there for Merlin/Elyan? Would you kill for a gifset comparing the way Arthur looks at Gwen to the way he looks at Merlin? Those are things you can offer as a creator, or potentially request from a creator as a bidder.

This is a pan fandom event, so if you’re new to Merlin and don’t feel comfortable creating for it yet, you’re perfectly welcome to sign up as a creator for a different fandom. I have participated the last four years, and it’s a great way to raise money and motivate yourself to get those WIPs finished.

For more info check out @fandomtrumpshate or take a look at their CARRD which can be found here.

Even if you can’t participate, consider reblogging this so that it reaches more Merlin fans. The more people to bid on, the more money raised!

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dxngosstuff · 1 year

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Does the Moonlight Shine on Paris? (ii)

Idol!Yoon Jeonghan x Idol!f!Reader

900+ words ; cw :none | m.list tags: friends to lovers; fluff; minor angst; idol au; elements of slowburn; second male lead scoups;

Yoon Jeonghan realizes a few things about you after sharing a drink with you in Paris.

“Break a leg out there.”

You went to check who the message was from and it was none other than Jeonghan. After having a heartfelt talk with Jeonghan last night, he took the pleasure of taking you back to your hotel room. It wasn’t your intention to get that deep into the conversation that night but he managed to open a can of worms that you never really expected.

A smile grew on your face after reminiscing the talk that you had. To your surprise, he was quite the listener. You only ever saw him playing around during drinking games and being the sly man that he is but last night, he was mellow and amiable.

‘I should drink with him more often.’ You thought to yourself while the make-up artist applied your lipstick on your lips.

You look different today as you had a more sultry look. It matched the vibe of the brand you were representing and it’s a new look compared to the image you had back home. It made you wonder how he would be styled today. You always knew that Jeonghan was a good looking man. Even during your trainee days but you just didn’t give it much thought because somebody else was the apple of your eye. But, that wasn’t the case anymore.

What you felt for Seungcheol before was a thing of the past. You had the closure you needed with him after affirming that things between the two of you will never progress the way you would like it to. The both of you knew that you were better off as friends anyway.

“All done.” The makeup artist brought you back to your senses and you were stunned at the way they did your makeup. You thanked the artist sincerely.

“Just do the Hoshi Pose if you run out of ideas.” You texted him with a cute tiger sticker after realizing that you didn’t send one back and proceeded to put on your outfit for the night.

—

You could hear his name being chanted by his fans from a block away even inside your car. He had arrived an hour earlier than you at the show and it had just dawned on you that Seventeen had become really big. The chants were deafening and the flashes from the cameras were blinding but you couldn’t help but smile to yourself thinking that the boys you used to train with have now become international superstars.

The car came to a halt a couple of steps from the venue and that’s when the people turned their attention to you. You were now the subject of the screams and the target of the flashes and you gave everybody a smile and a slight bow as you were being assisted outside the vehicle while the screams only grew louder.

“Y/n!!”

You made your way to the venue, signing albums and merchandise on the way there, while having small conversations with your fans. As you got closer to the brand’s huge logo at the center of the venue, you made eye contact with Jeonghan and gave him a warm smile along with a “fighting” gesture. He nodded and slowly made his way to you.

You were now surrounded by the paparazzi and people’s screams were louder than ever. The camera men were telling you to pose together and you both gladly did so. Jeonghan could already tell what the headlines would be tomorrow but he hoped your interactions would be perceived as solely platonic.

When the excitement died down around you, Jeonghan whispered in your ear. “You look amazing tonight.”

This caught you off-guard so you quickly looked up to him as you were processing what he had said to you. Giving him a look from head to toe, you retorted, “You don’t look too bad yourself” and gave him a smirk to which you both gave each other a small laugh. Jeonghan continued walking while hiding his lingering smile behind the back of his hand.

—

The event ended successfully and you both had an amazing time. The show was filled with amazing pieces and the people around you were fun to talk to and despite the socially draining evening, you found yourself in Jeonghan’s hotel room again after washing up in yours.

You hear the door to his bathroom unlock and he came out in his pajamas but his hair was still visibly wet. “Come here, I’ll dry your hair for you so don’t catch a cold.” You sat at the edge of the bed and motioned for him to come over.

Compared to last time, the room was completely lit and the TV was on. Albeit, you really couldn’t understand anything because everything was in French so it was all background noise for you.

He hesitated slightly before deciding to plop down on the floor in between your legs. You turned on the hair dryer and started ruffling his hair.

“It’s so soft.” You whispered.

You continued ruffling his hair and he started to feel a sense of comfort. Your touch was light and delicate yet it was making his stomach heavy. He felt like he wanted to stop time for a while and rest his head on your thigh to take a nap and the lavender scent that you had on you was intoxicating to him, but he didn’t know if it was because of the atmosphere or it was because of you.

The loud sound of the hair dryer came to a halt and a cheerful voice accompanied it. “There we go! All dry and fresh.” You patted both of his shoulders to signal that he was good to go.

Jeonghan stayed that way and didn’t move. He just stared at you which made you worried.

“Is there something on my face?” You asked as you slightly tilted your head.

“It’s nothing.” He said as he stood up and fixed his hair in the mirror. And once again, he felt that same heavy feeling in his stomach as he caught a glimpse of you in the mirror.

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churrothezanyrabbit · 5 days

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my psa before i sleep:

don’t be insecure about your own art, regardless of what kind it is

if you think it’s bad and receive negative criticism, just keep practicing, don’t give up

you’ll get somewhere someday, and plus, everyone has their own speeds, so don’t feel like just because someone else improved before you doesn’t mean you’re not trying hard enough, you’re trying hard enough, you just have a different pace

and also don’t feel intimidated by bigger artists and especially don’t compare yourself to others, because then, you won’t have motivation for your own art and won’t want to keep working to succeed and make progress

this goes for body building, and more, etc etc

tldr,, don’t compare yourself to others and keep practicing, don’t give up and push yourself little by little instead of focusing on the negatives, because then progress won’t be made and you’ll only keep feeling worse, nobody runs at the same speeds

#churro talks #churro psa #psa #art #body building #all types of art #all art #any art #art 🫶#art psa #never give up #keep going and trying to improve

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winchester-reload · 2 years

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Hey Jackie!

How do you stop with being too perfectionist about your art and comparing yourself too much to other artists? How do you decide when to stop with a painting? I struggle extremely with bringing myself down and I know I should not set as high standards to myself but at the same time it is of course also what keeps me moving. And also I tend to value my own worth in responses that I get to my art sometimes ...

I am sorry if that is too much info and I know you are of course no therapist for that 😅 But as a fellow artist, do you have any tips for dealing with that?

You know what, anon? This is a really, really great question. One, I think all creatives are confronted with from time to time—or, even, CONSTANTLY. With the advent of the internet and social media, it's actually a problem that extends beyond creative works. But I'll ignore that aspect of it for this post and focus on art creation only.

So, as I’ve already alluded, this is something I also deal with. And overcoming it can be a monumental task at times--even for me (or, rather, people you may view of as more established artists). Though I don’t have a cure for it, I can tell you some of the things I try to keep in mind to keep myself moving.

#1) The first and best thing you can know as an artist is that perfection is your enemy.

What does that mean? It means you’ll never EVER reach perfection-- and not because you’re bad or unskilled, but because it’s IMPOSSIBLE. Literally the only way you can fail is by seeking perfection in your work. What you should try to focus on instead is simply finishing the piece AND THEN STARTING ANOTHER ONE. Momentum and progress is far more beneficial to you as an artist than somehow magically getting one piece of art exactly right.

How do I know? Because that last line in bold is the code I live by. I would not be here with even one single piece of art posted if I’d waited for perfection to post it first--or even sometimes satisfaction! <--this is true of any and all of my art btw. The pieces I think I executed well still fall short of the original concept in my mind. And even those are few and far between.

Which leads us to our next problem: Being hard on yourself as a means of motivation.

I’ve got a sharp pill for us both to swallow. Ready?

#2) Being hard on yourself DOESN’T WORK.

Being hard on yourself, or demeaning your skill will not help motivate or move you. Note: this is different from being regimented, or strict with your practice.

This kind of thinking brings you to a halt. Case in point: this ask you submitted to me. If it worked, you probably wouldn’t be struggling with your artistic worth right now. Instead, it acts as a slow moving poison in your mind. A constant whisper that what you do is not good enough, and that it might never be good enough. Eventually, it’ll make you lose confidence in your own skill, and the self-doubt will cripple you. Then, as you give up, and go to wallow on social media, looking at other artists’ work, wishing you could be half as talented as they are, that beautiful little art flame inside you will die a little more.

But the truth is, you are already as talented as all those artists you admire. And no, I don’t mean that in some kind of ‘everyone gets a gold star at Jackie’s Painting Palace' kind of way. What I mean is, ART IS A SKILL YOU HAVE TO BUILD. Talent is negligible.

Did I say that loud enough? YOU ALREADY HAVE MORE TALENT THAN YOU’LL EVER NEED TO BE AN AMAZING ARTIST. YOU JUST HAVE TO TRAIN YOUR FLOPPY MEATSUIT TO DO THE THINGS YOUR BRAIN SEES. It’s as simple as that. And as frustrating, and time consuming, and irritating...

*The only way I’ll accept talent as coming into play is if our joint definition of ‘talent’ is to be too goddamn stubborn to be stopped by the overwhelming frustration of learning this craft*

And the only way to learn it is to try, get up if you stumble, and try it again. Over and over and over. And guess what? Sometimes--maybe even a lot of those times--other people will see your art you make for the delicious chocolate rainbow cake it is, even if you can’t. And when they do, soak in the love. But try not to be dependent on it. Make the art because you want to make the art, regardless of its reception, then, make some more.

As they say-- If you build it, they will come. Steadily producing and working on your craft is what will help people find you. And as your audience grows, you get the opportunity for more interaction and feedback! And if the feedback is negative, embrace that spiteful anarchist rebel inside you and make another one just like it. (I mean, how do you think I ended up making so much destiel art??? Oh man. All those Instagram trolls are to thank. Troll: “Dean would never”

Me: IDK, man. It looks like he’s pretty in to it. I guess I’ll do make another one just to check...)

Anyway... little by little, every new thing you learn from each sketch, painting, thumbnail concept--whatever--will add up and reflect in your art. But you have to be patient and diligent about practicing.

And

So, anon, rather than getting caught up in the details or endgame desires, do me a favor. The next piece of art you work on (which will hopefully be the moment you finish reading this), if you find yourself with ‘runaway brain’, take a break. Get some water. Get some space from it. And when you’ve rested, go back to it. Fix anything you can fix with fresh eyes, leave anything you can’t. And then post it. When you do, say something to yourself like, “All right, it is what it is. On to the next”. <-- I’ve done this for every piece of art I’ve ever posted, and believe me when I say it is the sole reason I've had the nerve to publish a lot of the art I have.

Is any of it perfect? HELL NAW. But, it’s finished. Some of it’s fun. And all of it serves as snapshots that prove the incremental improvements we make with each of our pieces do eventually add up. They’ll never add up to perfection, but where’s the fun in ‘perfect’ anyway? The adventure is in the journey, not the destination.

If you can keep these things in mind, I promise you can get over these mind hurdles. Some days will be easier than others, but I believe you can do it. Remember, the only difference between success and failure is a willingness to try.

I sincerely hope this helps.

Happy arting, my friend <3

#asks #art asks #my art #destiel #wonderful people

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shoppncarticles · 1 year

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SG Feature: Introduction

Well HEY there. Thanks for coming to my blog and checking out a new segment I want to run, the SKULLGIRLS FEATURE. A sort of offshoot from the Creature Feature, this will be a series of articles where I talk about all the wonderful characters and designs from Skullgirls universe, or at least as many as I feel like discussing in detail. Don’t worry, that’ll encompass a majority of them, since Skullgirls may have the highest concentration of unique and interesting character designs in a single series, in my opinion. There’s just so much detail and history here that I hardly know where to start.

Here’s an idea though, why don’t I get you a little familiar first? After all, I don’t expect nearly as many people coming into this article already having an extensive knowledge of Skullgirls and its world, or at least a general idea of how things work like I could with Pokemon. After all, there’s a crazy amount of worldbuilding going on here, and (almost) every character interconnects with the main story in some important way, so it’d probably help if you knew some of these things before I got to explaining the complexities of each character individually. Though, if you’re already pretty familiar with the Skullgirls world and story, you can probably skip this article since it’d just be repeating a bunch of stuff you already know. If not, keep reading!

As for a brief introduction of Skullgirls as a whole though, it’s a fighting game project created by artist & designer Alex Ahad, which started all the way back in the early 2000s as a Mugen mod, of all things. The first pre-alpha was made by Alex in 2005, before getting help from programmer Mike Z and other developers in order to create Skullgirls in full.

Compare these two videos of the game’s progression, five years apart, and see how far this passion project has come since its initial conception.

youtube

Just look at this wacky roster of characters from the conceptual stage! I’m sure they won’t be immensely polished up and redesigned during development.

It wasn’t until 2012 that Skullgirls finally saw a full release, with an initial roster of 8 characters. Support for the game would continue for a few years after its release, with new characters getting added through DLC until 2015, and for quite some time it seemed like Skullgirls was put on the backburner while its studio, Lab Zero Games worked on new projects. After some internal disputes though, which lead most of the staff to leave Lab Zero and form Future Club instead, Skullgirls resumed active development in 2021 with the addition of more DLC characters. The game would even land a spot at the competitive gaming tournament EVO in 2022, a full decade after its initial release.

The game has a crazy amount of attention to detail put into it, since not only is every sprite and frame for each fighter hand drawn and fluidly animated, but hitboxes are also extremely precise, matching some of the game’s other frame-specific mechanics. It’s also famous for having one of the most stable online netcodes of any major fighting game, which has been a huge plus in keeping it alive for so long.

Not every fighting game has this kind of luxury, you understand.

Complexity like that is what kind of gives Skullgirls a thick barrier to entry and prevents a lot of people from playing it comfortably. Hey, I don’t blame you, fighting games are hard to get into and Skullgirls can get especially tough if you aren’t fully aware of what you’re doing and what you’re capable of. But that’s why I’m here, to help you learn and read about the world and characters without having to go through the experience of learning the ins and outs of such a dynamically complex game. For whatever you might say about the game itself, I feel like all the care and effort put into it artistically can’t be overstated, because what we’ve got here is a real gem.

So, sit yourself down and get comfortable, because we’re in for the long haul on this one.

The Setting

The main setting of Skullgirls is the Canopy Kingdom. Ruled by the royal Renoir family, the kingdom itself consists of the regal capital Canopolis, the dense and lively metropolitan city of New Merdian, the smaller fishing village of Little Innsmouth, and the suburbs of Maplecrest, to name a few major locations. Inspiration for the Canopy Kingdom is kind of all over the place, so it makes placing a real world equivalent kind of difficult, but the developers have described its climate most closely resembling Northern California, while Canopolis visually resembles parts of central Europe. The devs have also admitted that they kind of just do whatever ends up looking cool in terms of design for the locations.

Honestly, that’s part of what’s special about Skullgirls to me. It does just about whatever it wants with its artistic design without sticking to one specific inspirational source or theme. For instance, while many environments and technology seen in the hands of average civilians may resemble that of 1940s-50s America, advanced cybernetics and arcane magic are also relatively commonplace in the Skullgirls world that no one finds them to be too terribly unusual. This extends even to the world’s inhabitants, since alongside normal humans, the Skullgirls world is also populated by animal-human hybrids called Ferals, fish-human hybrids called Dagonians, and monstrous giants referred to as Gigans. No exact explanation is given as to why these various species coexist with each other, and in my opinion none are necessarily needed. They just helps things feel much more varied, really.

Another important location worth mentioning is No Man’s Land - a war-torn wasteland on the outskirts of the Canopy Kingdom, lying between it and its neighboring kingdoms. There used to be developed civilizations here, but they’ve all been reduced to rubble in a devastating war that occurred seven years prior to the game’s main story. What little life does still cling to this area is easy pickings for the seedy underbelly of nearby city.

Speaking of, most of what happens in the various characters’ stories takes place in the city of New Meridian, its major strengths being its diverse population, renowned art and culture, and bustling entertainment economy. Things aren’t perfect in this city, though, since behind the scenes it’s being run by...

The Medici Mafia

The Medici Mafia are the ones who have proper control over the bustling city of New Meridian while the Renoir family are busy trying to manage the entire Canopy Kingdom. While the Medici have a pleasant reputation amongst the average New Meridian citizens, thanks to their organizing of several city facilities such as the River King Casino, their true nature is a bit more uncouth. Nothing will prevent the Medicis from dabbling in more unsavory activities if it helps strengthen them in some fashion, typically financially. Due to how much power they hold over the central location of the game, if there’s something that goes wrong in the Skullgirls story you can usually tie it back to them in some way.

The other major threat to the world, however, lies in...

The Skull Heart

The Skull Heart is an ancient relic, created by the divine creators of the Skullgirls world, the Trinity. Think of your typical cursed wishing treasure, and you’ll be pretty close to what the Skull Heart is. It can be used by any woman who gets their hands on it to grant a single wish, but if the wish is not pure the heart will twist that wish in a morbid fashion like a demented genie. In all of its centuries of existing, the Skull Heart has yet to be given a pure wish to fulfill, and thus continues to reappear every seven years to an unlucky soul. As per the developers’ words, wishes are inherently selfish and thus impossible to be completely pure.

What’s worse is that anyone who uses the Skull Heart ends up being cursed into becoming the Skullgirl, a god-like being of pure destruction and death that carries out the Trinity’s goal of destroying the world entirely. Why they couldn’t just destroy the world outright if they wanted to isn’t exactly known, but it is implied they’re quite entertained by watching all the chaos of the mortal world, so maybe that’s where the idea of a cursed wishing relic came from.

Of course, you could always not wish on the Skull Heart. It is actually quite fragile and can be easily destroyed if it isn’t currently empowering a Skullgirl, but nothing will prevent it from eventually returning in seven years.

Speaking on the Trinity, they of course haven’t been seen in person outside of some joke cutscenes, but are important not only for creating the Skull Heart but also making up the religion followed in the Skullgirls world. They can be seen here, visualized in the windows of New Meridian’s Grand Cathedral. Respectively, they’re known as Venus, Mother, and Aeon.

Anti-Skullgirl Labs

Given how much of a problem the Skullgirl is for the safety of the world at large - but specifically the Canopy Kingdom, since that’s where they keep appearing for the past few cycles - King Renoir started a project involving the Anti-Skullgirl Labs. These were a series of laboratories each specializing in a different field with the end goal of finding ways to efficiently exterminate Skullgirls before they can cause mass damage to the kingdom. The overall success of these labs are quite mixed, and after the failure to handle the previous Skullgirl before the game’s main story takes place, King Renoir put through an order to shut down all ASG Labs. Despite this, a couple remain active underground, continuing to produce technology in order to combat future Skullgirls. The most noteworthy of these is Lab 8, which specialized in Synthetic Parasite production. What are Synthetic Parasites, you may ask?

Parasites (and Living Weapons)

Parasites are another sapient species of the Skullgirls universe, but cannot survive on their own for extended periods of time and thus must continually bond with a host. Despite their name, Parasites are typically mutualistic in biology and work in tandem with their hosts rather than causing them discomfort or leeching off their body. Parasites also need to replace or take some part of their host’s body in order to form the connection, though not all Parasites are required to be physically connected. It’s said that Parasites were once revered as being very powerful and respected pieces of society, but have since become subject to discrimination and prejudice in the Skullgirls world following some ambiguous incident.

As I said previously, ASG Lab 8 specialized in Synthetic Parasites, specifically the creation of cybernetic Parasites in order to effectively give people superpowers which they could use to better combat Skullgirls and other potential threats. These Parasites typically do not resemble living creatures and are treated more like tools compared to the real Parasites, though there are a few exceptions.

Speaking of tools which may or may not be alive, there are also Living Weapons in Skullgirls too! Living Weapons are typically far less sapient than Parasites though, and none (with one exception) have been seen with individual personalities or the ability to speak thus far. They’re quite selective too, only certain chosen individuals are capable of wielding specific Living Weapons.

Got All That?

Alright, that should do it with all the preliminary info you’ll need to know before heading into these Skullgirls articles. I just want to make sure you’ll know what I’ll be talking about in these things, y’know? I don’t want you wandering around all confused and stuff because someone didn’t tell you what a Maplecrest was, or something.

Speaking of, I should mention how I’ll be structuring these articles. Things will be split into three major chunks, first, an intro where I give a brief synopsis on the character. Then, a story segment where I talk about the character’s history, what they do in the ‘main’ Skullgirls story (main in quotes since Skullgirls does have a central plot that it revolves around - but each of the character’s individual Story Modes are non-canonical What Ifs), and what happens in each of their Story Modes. Last, I’ll dedicate some time to each of the characters’ visual designs, talking about any clever features that may be apart of their appearance or their attacks. Trust me when I say that each of Skullgirls’s characters are ripe with detail and talking material, so these articles are sure to be quite hefty. I hope you’ll be looking forwards to it, because there’s quite a bit to go over!

[Skullgirls Archive]

#skullgirls #creature feature #creature design #character design

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sweaterrat · 1 year

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H-How? How do you keep making great art? Please give any tips if you feel like it 💜💛

Hello there!! <333 Thanks for stopping by! Sorry this took so long to do! Thank you for being so patient :]

To answer your questions, I’m not very great at advice 😭😭 I’m a self taught artist so I mostly learned things by experimentation (and a bit of YouTube 🐈‍⬛ )!!! Anywaysss here’s some tips that I got stuffed in my pocket :]

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⭑|| Don’t compare your work to others!! It’s totally okay to use others art as a reference and an inspiration (as long as you don’t trace ofc!) but try not to compare yourself to other people. It can make you really unmotivated and possibly eat away at your self esteem!! Remember that you are an amazing artist in your own amazingly creative way!! <3

⭑|| Use references!!! FOR GOODNESS SAKE USE REFERENCES!! Your art is definitely going to come out better if you use a reference! And if you need to, you can use a base drawing! (I use base drawings as refs for my art some times and it really helps!)

⭑|| Watch tutorials! You can learn a whole bunch of stuff from YouTube! Leaning basic anatomy is really important as well! There are also loads of tutorials on tiktok and tumblr! Someone who I watch a lot is BlueBiscuits on YouTube!! They have a lot of good tutorials and it helps a bunch! :D ⭑|| Develop your style by studying your favorite artists!! How I got better was by doing art studies of pieces that I really liked! I tried to find out what made their art uniquely theirs! Now, this doesn’t mean trace others art. While tracing is a form of practice for some people, you should never trace someone’s art and claim it as yours! It’s better to use someone’s art as a reference instead! (credit them if needed ofc!)

⭑|| Practice and Experiment! PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE!!! If you’re bad at hands, practice that! If you’re not so great at anatomy, get to work! Ask yourself what you’re struggling at. Practice makes progress!! (There’s no such thing as perfect ^^) Experiment with different things! Shadows, Color theory, etc! But remember, don’t burn yourself out and take breaks! <3 I hope these helped at least a little bit!! As I said, I’m not great with advice 😭 Anywizzle! Hope you have a wonderful day!!! <333 – Your Local, Sweater Rat 🍋

#art tips #asks #ratspeaks #tips and tricks

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vanmec · 1 year

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Hello! I've adored your art for some time now. I've been wondering how old u may be? As an artist myself working on portfolio for school, I'm trying to have a look on other artists in the same age category!

Tysm and I understand if ur not comfortable with answering :)) <3

Aww thank you so much! I’m in my 20s!

More importantly though, you shouldn’t compare yourselves to others! As interesting as it is to see how ‘talented’ others are or ages and whatnot, it’s unfortunately setting yourself up for disappointment. We all start and progress at different rates, age really is arbitrary when it comes to creative expression. There’s gonna be 10 year old prodigies and 60 year old beginners. We have different ideas, different styles, we all dream differently. So just do your very best, don’t be afraid to make mistakes, and keep moving forward. Even if you fall short, take it in stride and keep working hard, and one day you won’t be falling short. Look back on yourself and see how far you’ve come. Be proud of your progress.

#ask van

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mr-craig · 1 year

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2022, An Introspective Retrospective:

As the year comes to an end once more, each one feeling shorter than the last, I am of course in a reflective mood. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, as the man said.

Covid continues to exist, and I continue to shield for my own safety. If anything, I have to try harder now than I did when the pandemic was new and shiny. The frustrating truth is that The Public™️ is bored of all these tiresome life-saving safety measures, and the likelihood of me getting coughed on by a plague-carrier in public is at an all-time high. Life in the high-risk category is low-fun. Do me (and yourself) a favour and wear a damn mask if you can.

I spent the first half of the year working diligently to put the finishing touches on my album, Star Stuff. I had been working on it in a low-pressure way since 2019, when I first considered making a solo album in my then-new flat. Three years and one pandemic later, I finally finished recording, producing and mixing the music, got it mastered by Jon Clayton at the ever-trusty One Cat Studio, and set to work preparing all the promotional materials. It was a big project for one person to undertake, hence it taking such a bloody long time. But I’m proud of the results. I think it might be the best music I’ve ever made (unquestionably the best I’ve done solo), though it was also a lonely process.

The album led to my second time on the cover of Nightshift, nice reviews in Nightshift and OMS, airplay on BBC Oxford and interviews on Melting Pot and Riverside Rhythms. And the music video for Gene Kelly is on the Telly, directed by Laima Bite, was screened at the Ultimate Picture Palace (my favourite cinema!) as part of Divine Schism’s ten year anniversary celebrations. Not bad considering I have been entirely unable to gig for the third year running, making recorded music and remote appearances the only way for my music to reach people. I’m very thankful for everyone who collaborated, promoted, and offered moral support. I will admit a certain amount of envy for all the artists who have been able to resume gigging, I feel at a distinct disadvantage musically — but then I think of some of my favourite studio-bound artists, like Robert Wyatt and XTC, and remind myself that gigging isn’t the be-all and end-all for every artist.

The final third of the year was unprecedented. I developed an abscess in August, and at the end of the month I was rushed to hospital. Surgery took place on the first day of September, and my scheduled album release was finalised from my hospital bed the very next day. (That is to say, I pressed the “release” button on Bandcamp — you have to do it manually for some reason.) I’ll spare you the gory details, but I’ll just say that it was probably the single most physically painful experience of my life so far. My week in hospital was also the farthest from home I’ve been since the start of the pandemic, and the longest I’ve been away from home since I can’t even remember when. The change of scenery and the social contact was a mixture of exhausting, terrifying, and oddly welcome. But it was a relief to get home, and I’ve made a huge amount of progress healing from surgery these past few months. I don’t know how long it’ll take to get Back To Normal, or what my new normal might look like compared to the old, but my approach to healing is the same as to shielding: It takes as long as it takes.

In the meantime I’ve kept myself occupied with books (whether printed, electronic, or audio), chats with lovely friends, online roleplaying games (not like that, dirty… okay *mostly* not like that!) and board games, radio comedy, and the Nintendo Switch I bought myself as a reward for making it through the hospital experience. I have been hooked on The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild for the past couple of months, what a magnificent game! I have been rather neglecting the other games in my collection, but there’s plenty of time to get to them next year. (My profile tells me I’ve played approximately 70 hours of Zelda, compared with a paltry 5 hours of Mario Kart 8. Which is why my younger nibling can beat me in EVERY race.)

Being stuck in bed has also given me extra time to reflect, and I finally came to the belated but obvious-in-hindsight conclusion that I am autistic. Many of the friends I feel most comfortable with are also either autistic or some other form of “neurospicy”, and the number of “haha, I do that!” moments I’ve had from social media posts about autism finally became too great to ignore. The lists, the special interests, the self-imposed daily routines, the anxiety caused by bad sensory input, the social discomfort and dislike of eye contact! How did I not see this before?! (Not to mention the huge overlap in the Venn diagram of queerness, kink, and autism. Yeah. All of that.) The more I read, the more I realise that so many of my habits and reactions are closely associated with autism. If it looks like an autistic duck and quacks like an autistic duck…

I am hoping my health will improve next year to the point that I can resume working on music. I have several new songs already demoed in healthier days, some of which could probably be mixed and released as-is, so even if it takes longer to get back to performing, at least I have something to work on in the meantime. There are also potential new projects in the pipeline that I am excited to explore when that’s physically possible. Apart from that, I expect next year will feature more books, more gaming, and more friendship. I hope I will also reignite my love of film — I watched a mere 11 films this year, easily my lowest showing since records began!

Anyway, thank you to everyone who has been here for me this year, whether we spoke every day or just had a little chat here and there. Thank you to those who listened to my music, especially if you shared it with others. Thank you if you laughed at my silly jokes and sent me some of your own. Social media is my main window on the world right now, so thank you all for blooming in my little window box.

#mr craig rambles #some introspection

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journen · 2 years

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how did you get into art/get so good! i feel like every time i try it's a huge flop and i despair that i will never be able to draw anything original

Hey anon! Thank you for the question! This is gonna be a long post but i’ll trap some of it under a read more lol. So sorry for the essay in advance!! And i also wanted to say, when i saw your message i immediately thought of this post. Its v accurate and true.

So anyhow… got into art mostly when I was 11… I really liked the game Zelda Skyward Sword lol, and started trying to come up with and illustrate my own original zelda stories, etc… (not that they were any good i was a kid haha🤣) and then I ended up doing this for other fandoms i got into in the future! And so i just kept drawing? I always have a million story ideas in my head, and drawing is my way to get them out of my head and see it as an illustration lol. I didn’t actually start taking it seriously until 2019 tho. It took a long time, and theres still a million more things i can learn and improve at, progress can be slow but my main advice is to…

Draw what inspires you, especially when you are starting off! And especially if it’s just a hobby! Because the key to improving, is to just keep drawing. You will not improve in any other way. And having fun with it is so important! And you mentioned being concerned your work has to be super original…if you think originality will get you success - you are kinda drawing for the wrong reasons I think. Try to have fun with it first, and you will find your original style as you go and improve.

Anyhow, improvement can take a long time, and if you’re like me, you’re always going to think your stuff isn’t good enough and you should be better, but you can’t let that get you down because otherwise you will give up, and we are better than that right?

More under the cut!

And you mentioned your work “flopping” - don’t judge your worth / skill over how many notes something you did gets! 🥺 This is the social media curse lol. The amount of attention your work gets is not an absolute measure of your skill whatsoever. Try to learn to draw for your own enjoyment, and not compare yourself to others because we all have different levels of experience and different things we are good at. I understand the despair feeling tho lol, but if you get bogged down by the negatives you will never improve. 💛

Oh! And as you go, the more you improve, then you can start doing more fine tuned studies(like environment/anatomy/lighting studies) but using reference is always good too when you are drawing! I never draw without ref lol, but maybe that’s the concept artist in me. Drawing is hard work tho and you end up having to put the work in if you really want to improve eventually, but if you draw what inspires you then it doesn’t feel like as much work as it is. 😉

Anyhow, sorry for the essay! I just have a lot of passionate thoughts on this topic. Thank you for the question anon! Idk if this helped at all, or was interesting, but yeah!! 💛💛 Please keep drawing and don’t give up! And feel free to reach out if you have any questions in the future!

Heres one of my fav memes as a treat for reading this whole post

#sorry for writing so much again #youve just caught me in a moment where i am lacking sleep and almost have no filter lol #sorry if i went over oard #overboard*#but yeah!!#journen speaks #text post #anon ask #feel free any other anons to ask any questions too!!#i rb’d a post about it earlier today lol #💛💛💛

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lunarreaper-ut · 2 years

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Yknow, I think I’ve made another breakthrough when it comes to art

I’m an adult, as many of you know, and I often find myself comparing my art and my style to that of younger artists, and I always have that moment of “They’re younger and more talented than me, I don’t know why I bother” But then I realize a lot of those artists may have been drawing for years!

I didn’t start drawing until just a couple years ago when I started this blog. I was already well out of highschool and the progress I’ve made since then is something I’m proud of.

anyways this is just a post to remind others like me that you’re something to be proud of, and comparing yourself to others is only good if you’re using that to improve, not bring yourself down.

This has been uhhh

Art Lessons with Luna

Oki gubye

#Luna's rambling #Me doin the talky talks

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 2 years

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I went on a long hike today, climbed a sort of mountain-like thing, walked from the village where my grandparents live to the nearest town and the whole thing took about four hours. Luckily I had three hours of Daniel Kitson doing a show in 2005, which was a bootlegged version of a preview of a show that he’s released officially on Bandcamp, and I find it really interesting to hear two versions of the same show. One time in a preview show when he informed the audience that it was a work in progress and he was trying to figure out its structure before taking it to Edinburgh, and one performance that was actually done at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival once he’d polished it into the show he wanted (obviously, the latter is the one he released officially).

I think this is only the second time I’ve seen two versions of the same show – the other being when I saw Nish Kumar in New York and then in Montreal a couple of months later. That time, I found it interesting to try to spot every little difference and guess why he made those changes. I got really into doing the same thing with the Kitson show, and I can do it much better because I have recordings of them both. For Kumar I had to remember the one and compare it to the second; for Kitson I can listen to them both carefully and catch all the differences. And I will do that, but I will not go on too much about it here, because I did say just yesterday that I think it’s a good thing for comedians to be able to do work in progress shows with the assumption that no one’s recording and they won’t be held forever to what they said. So, all right, I’ll try to make most (not all, but most) of the things I think about that draft version of the show stay off the public internet, to at least sort of do my part in letting artists control what parts of their art go on the public internet. Or to at least not actively work against that quite as much as I’d like to. I guess.

But okay, I have to say a bit and that’s the fact that there were an entire 35 minutes at the beginning that were not in the Bandcamp version at all, because they were just talking to the crowd and discussing what he’d done the night before. And those minutes were as funny as the actual show. Not as well put together, not the same level of insightful and thought-provoking and other terms that I want to apply to this even though just using them makes me feel pretentious. Though I’ve recently heard Nish Kumar say that Stewart Lee once gave him the advice that if you find yourself wanting to apologize for the fact that what you’re about to say may sound pretentious, just cut the apology and qualifications and say the pretentious thing anyway. I think I love that advice and I realize it was meant to apply to performing comedians but I might start trying to follow it in my own life. Even though I just failed to do so.

Anyway. The point is that I’m not saying Daniel Kitson’s off-the-cuff (or last minute, at least – I don’t think he improvised everything at the beginning of that recording, but he clearly came up with it on short notice) material is as good as his carefully planned and written shows. Because they don’t have all the tightly written expressions of his perspective and ways that it nicely flows together and all the surprises and the way one comment can have humour coming from five different places, and the other things that make his proper shows beautiful. But for pure laughs, his offcuts are almost as funny as most of what’s in his main shows, and that’s so fucking impressive. That he can be that funny when you’ve had time to carefully prepare but also just know in the moment how to be that funny.

I was halfway up a very large hill today and just marveling at how many times I’d laughed at his story about running around Russell Howard’s backyard, from the night before that show. And I know when comedians say “last night” they don’t usually mean “last night”, but I’m pretty sure he did that time. The show was in Cardiff, and he explained that he’d done a gig in Bristol the night before and then stayed with a friend there before taking a train to Cardiff to be at the current show – I’m pretty sure it was a real story. Which means the stuff about running around a yard with Russell after the Bristol show really had taken place the night before, which means he’d written that story in less than a day. And it was as funny as most comedy material I’ve heard. Not just that he got lucky and had a really inherently funny thing happen to him the night before that show – the thing that happened itself was only a bit funny, but Daniel Kitson told it so well that it could pass for something that had been carefully written and worked on for months. And he just threw that out to a crowd in Cardiff one day in 2005, before getting on to his actual show. Daniel Kitson when he’s barely trying is as funny as most people’s final, polished, carefully written stand-up shows. Kitson can add all the other magic and insight and stuff because the humour’s there to start with. The word “genius” gets thrown around and overused a lot, but Jesus Christ he is good.

I’ve realized as I write this that he did the same thing in the 2003 show I heard. Talked to the audience for so long that he had to condense the show he’d actually written as he was running out of time. Went on amazingly funny tangents based on stuff the audience said. Included some stories that had clearly been written beforehand, but he only went into them in response to audience members so he can’t have planned to tell them all that day. He just had all that stuff ready to go and could throw it out at any time. It reminds me a little of the confidence and huge levels of talent in the Heckler’s Welcome show that I saw James Acaster do last month – going into a situation knowing you have enough funny things to say so that you can respond to anything. That goes for pre-written stories but not pre-planned stories, and for things that are completely off the cuff.

Okay, I think I said somewhere back there that I wasn’t going to go into details about those shows. To be fair, I said I wouldn’t get into the specifics of what changed between the bootleg version of a June 2005 show and the officially released version of the same show from August 2005, after the work in progress had progressed further. I said I won’t break down the earlier draft of his prepared material that he clearly did not want to be a version that would be preserved for years to come. I never said anything about how I wouldn’t spend 1,000+ words gushing about the comedic talent of a man who would be upset if he knew I was doing so because he’s trying to find a way to keep his comedic talent a closely guarded secret despite being a performing comedian for a living.

There was a Q&A bit at the end, when he said he was done his material and asked if anyone had questions for him. What followed were a set of some of the weirdest fucking questions, I don’t know how people came up with these or decided that would be a good use of the opportunity. But it was funny. I’m going to consider those fair game for describing because they don’t even count as part of the show itself, just bonus content. I don’t know if that justification is good enough, but it’s the one I have right now. Another justification is that my blog is much too small for any of this to matter, but I try to have at least some internal consistency. Here are most of the questions accompanied by short quotes that summarize the answers (so I’m mainly quoting the Welsh people who happened to be in the audience at a comedy show that day, and only doing a little bit of quoting Daniel Kitson, and actually that’s probably a better justification for why it’s acceptable to get into specifics of this part):

- Will there be any more fireworks? [because fireworks outside had constantly interrupted his show]

-----No, those were the last fireworks ever, sorry you spent them with me.

- What hotel are you at and how’s the robe there?

-----My robe is excellent, and do you think I’m naïve?

- Are you gay, or not?

-----No, sorry.

- Some question that had something to do with comedy groupies, I couldn’t hear the question properly and I can’t work it out from context because the response was just Kitson dismissing the question altogether and then claiming that Wales has no functioning democracy.

- Would you say Bono is a cunt or just a twat?

-----I don’t really know. Any other questions?

- What is the meaning of life?

-----42, did you not get a reading list? [I really liked this answer because Kitson seems like the sort of guy who’d think he’s too good for a fairly obvious Hitchhiker’s Guide reference, but he did it anyway and I enjoyed it.]

- Is Chris Addison posher than you?

-----Yeah he’s much posher than me, he went to a fucking private school.

- You’ve got the same management as Jimmy Carr. How do you feel? [I found this question especially funny because it’s the only one that came through completely clearly, and I’m about 95% sure that’s because it was asked by the guy who made the recording, speaking right next to whatever device he was using to record. And that just makes so much sense. Of course a person who has the audacity to record a live show in full and put it on the internet also has the audacity to get a comedian’s attention and ask him a question like that – one that I think is supposed to imply that sharing management means he has anything else in common with Jimmy Carr, even though of course it doesn’t mean that. That’s the sort of thing I might joke about on Tumblr, but I’d be mortified if I thought any of the comedians in question would ever see what I’d said. This guy is out there recording gigs and just saying it to his face. And yes I’m aware of the hypocrisy of calling him audacious for recording a show when I’m very happy to benefit from that recording by having some amazing material to listen to while I hike up a large hill.]

-----I was in his hot tub three weeks ago. We live opposite lives. He does corporates, adverts, everything that’s fucking offered to him. I do nothing that’s offered to me. And I’ve not got a hot tub.

- Do you want to buy a hot tub?

-----No, I want to buy a house that has a garden that could have a hot tub.

- How much do you get paid for a gig?

-----It depends; here I’ll get about 60 or 70 percent of the door price. [He then did some math and worked out a specific number, and it obviously wasn’t a low number, but it wasn’t quite as high as I’d expected. I guess I tend to assume all famous people make incredibly large amounts of money for everything they do, amounts of money that are in a completely different ballpark from what I think of as a high paying job. The number he came up with was up there, but it wasn’t quite as far out of that ballpark as I’d imagined.] Not many comedians would have answered that, because they would have understood it would have made it tense. I understood it would make it tense, but I don’t care.

- Excluding the obvious retort, who personifies a cunt?

-----So, basically, who do I think’s a cunt, apart from you? It depends on my mood. Half the time I think most people are fine and there are maybe two cunts, half the time I think everyone’s a cunt and there are maybe two good people.

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liadotpdf · 6 months

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God I need to write about this somewhere so tumblr it’s is. As an artist it may be my reality or it may be just a consequence of my procrastination, or it may be both in this case. I was met with a very big project for me (I’m a 21 yo graphic design & animation student on the second year of my studies with just some minor experience in the ✨real✨field.) it was my second or third project this big and in case of importance and exposure it was the biggest.

Anyway the deal was to make an animation that will be the part of the stenography in an amateur play in a really fancy theatre in tricyty so.. even tho it’s amateur….it’s big. My group made a plan we had only a month to do it the first premiere will be on this Friday. We got some ups and downs as a group a lot of things didn’t go as planned, I took a lead and one part of animation-the garden. I came across so many errors struggles and in general suffering haha jk. But it was tough recent week for me was sleepless and kinda falling behind with all the other projects I had for my studies. But today, I made it! I got it! Finished my part the animating process is done. I’m kinda relieved now I will only stress about being a coordinator on the plays, but it’s nice to know that I no more have to make the animation on every possible circumstance I have.

That made me thinkink about my state of mind. I haven’t even started to recover as I said I just exported the file, but I have to think about the work and my thoughts while struggling with this project.

The thing that kept hounding my tired brain was the fact that all of this was me not really keeping up and struggling with the work assigned to me, I was thinking how useless I am how my work is worthless that if my animation isn’t perfect then I disappointed everybody on my team. How I’m not suitable for the work.

It’s just crazy how easily those disturbing thoughts kept coming. Just because I was tired and Burnt out.

Right now as I’m done with my work and I gained some perspective and just took a breath I think I need to say this so someone will read this and it will affect them and probably so the future me will find it and I will remind myself about this.

1. Being 21yo is just being an adult baby, it’s okay that you struggle- you are learning. Everything you do rn is learning, gaining experience. Don’t compare yourself it’s never too late to improve and be succesful. And for you it’s not even close to being late. You are on a perfect point of your journey as you are right now.

2.the feelings that you have in this slump ate irrational. I know you Hape yourself rn but don’t make bad decisions just because you are feeling worthless at that particular moment.

3.every experience like this is a gem! Looking back at all my projects sketches works in progress there was so much changes and each one was better than the previous one.

4. It’s going to be okay. Some things won’t match your expectations, they can be even bad and just not go well at all but it’s still a learning process as long as you did your job and you gave everything you got- it is enough. And making not so great project isn’t the end of the world more so it’s better than not doing anything! Making mistakes and failing is a ok!!! The universe is too big to be worried about things like that.

Okay I think that’s all hah here is one more wip that won’t even make it to the stage at the end

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