#and im generally used to it now. in a weird way. i dont value my appearance but im aware of how im perceived.

[quinnonimp]

two things. one, your art is absolutely wonderful. i love the warm tones and style. two. got any like. weird art tips. like just weird things you do that work really well. or just art tips in general lol. there's something bout your style that makes me go ':D' lmao

aaaaaa tysm !!!! very glad u like my style <33 means a lot

and yeah id say i have quite a few with the way im very experimental n passionate abt art !

>> i think my weirdest one is rly just the main way i render tbh ? like, as u can pretty easily see with my main art style is that its all very crunchy n pixelated, n thats all cause i have anti-aliasing off for my brush . i render in a pretty unorthodox way but it makes things so so so much easier and more fun for me, even if its more time consuming for several reasons

heres a little bit of an infographic ive whipped up that hopefully u can get smth out of lmao . its 6am ive been up all night drawing as usual so im having a lot of trouble doing things properly sorry sorry

and the funny thing is this is aaaaaaaaall just cause i hate blending and am scared of committing to things (esp colors) so i just decided "okay whatever im gonna be goofy and just make it all pixelated idc anymore" and it worked !! (thanks homestuck) art is sm more enjoyable since i started doing this as it fits perfectly with the way my brain works and its helped me sm with getting better at colors bc of the way i have to do every single color manually (for several reasons like how i have to keep track of every color ((which makes me recycle them a lot more making things look more united)), gradients r the most fun to do but i have to make sure all the colors "blend" together nicely, i get to change them super easily, etc etc)

however these days i HAVE been trying to get back into working with anti-aliased brushes just to get out of my comfort zone n such, but tbh the only thing its helped me with is remind me how much more fun drawing aliased is and how absolutely dogshit i am at blending FDJHJKDF

also it makes me better at minecraft skins since im so used to working with pixels !

>> another little weird thing i have that honestly just goes against basic art rules is experiment by having ur values be as close together as possible without losing contrast . this is horrible as a tip, but fun as an experiment, and for me its just fun since i already know pretty well how values work and have enough experience to break the "rules" - because lot of times good shading colors r actually lighter than the original when put under b&w

so if ur like me i would recommend trying it out ! if u dont even know what values are then this ISNT good for u, do values properly as they really help

>> if u struggle a lot with side profiles, just learn from the gorillaz demon days album art . like literally im not joking that is THE thing that made me learn to draw side profiles and id say im pretty good at them now (however the effectiveness of this probably depends on the style)

and by learn from it i mean u can just trace it with any other characters, or study it, or reference it, yadaydayada . just do wahtever with it, damon albarn dgaf

obviously this isnt gonna magically make u great at side profiles but if u want a fun art challenge or ur a big gorillaz fan like me, it could get u kickstarted !!!! especially if ur doing it with ocs or characters u like that are in a band or something

ok thats all the tips ill be giving out tonight im a little sickly victorian child rn

hope it helped . uhm . bye

#anon #luckys art info #mailbox #quinnotalk #tumblrimp

[hyenagurl]

Opinion on drag queens? I can’t stand them tbh

im glad you asked tbh bc frankly i can’t really pinpoint my feelings entirely on them, its changed a lot over the years. when i was a 17-20 i was a HUGE drag race fan and i watched the show and posted on the subreddit, and this was when i first started exploring radical feminism so i wasnt unaware of the critiques going on about them here either. i guess back then i thought it was all in good fun. then a few years ago i lost interest in the show and like you i couldnt stand them anymore, i wrote them all off as overrated, sexist and tasteless caricatures of overblown femininity at best and actual degrading pornographic hateful stereotypes of women at worst (i considered then and now drag queens like trixie mattel, katya, detox icunt and raven to be the worst in this regard).

nowadays… im somewhere in the middle. while i dont know if i personally would go so far as to call it art (at least no more than i would consider the performance of femininity itself an ‘art’) i understand that it has its own history amongst gay men and i do think some of it has genuine merit as performance art - as in, some queens do put in the effort to make their own costumes, do their own choreography, etc. but on the other hand for that, if it is going to be evaluated as a performance art, then like other forms of art it should absolutely be held to the same standards of criticism, and shouldnt be shielded from that criticism just bc its an art created primarily by a marginalized group of gay men (or HST trans women). and thats where the very real feminist critiques on the misogyny in drag comes in, and it disgusts me that any concerns women have are written off as us being joykills or no better than conservative pukes or whatever. gay men are still capable of being misogynist towards women so it shouldnt be surprising at all that a good portion of drag queens are performing a sexist caricature of women (like the ones i mentioned above, those are considered to be the most famous and successful, go figure).

i think what really cemented this view in my mind was this clip that went viral awhile ago of this drag queen running around in a public space with this huge ridiculous floppy breastplate that was bouncing around… but then he ran into this group of children and he IMMEDIATELY cringed and covered himself. and it kinda just clicked for me for how weird some of this is, in a way that nobody but feminists were talking about. you have this grown man gleefully running around with this gross and porny and realistic looking piece of womens flesh worn over his body, because thats supposed to be funny and entertaining, and everyone takes it a face value and doesnt wonder what that says about how we view womens bodies?

i think the conservative backlash towards them in general is massively overblown, i dont think drag queens are in themselves inappropriate to be near children because feminine men are not inappropriate, altho i do think naked men or men wearing realistic breast plates or fetish gear ARE inappropriate to be around children, but thats just common sense lol, and yet both leftists and right wing morons fail to grasp this, that not all drag is child friendly, and similarly that some drag is misogynistic as well. (alot of them are mostly overrated as performers too…)

so yeah tldr i have mixed feelings towards them that can be best summed up as a passive annoyance or ambivalence. i agree that some of its very misogynistic and offensive, but that it varies from queen to queen. im sorry if this was meandering, im still trying to figure out my feelings towards them, and im hoping i can find some more feminist critiques on them to help me gather my thoughts towards them better lol

[ankhisms]

disclaimer im fine i just need to try and word various feelings and such pay no mind to the io who is trying to hold faer mental health together

i think the older i get and the more i desperately try to get better or at least be as healthy as i can reasonably expect to be with my various physical and mental issues the more it becomes clear to me... just how much a life time of being abused has altered my brain and tainted how i view myself. and i was obviously aware of this to a certain extent i am often painfully reminded of how much being abused and traumatized over and over throughout my life from a very young age has shaped me and how there are some things i may never fully heal from but will instead carry with me and have to live with. but recently its been jarring for me to like. be faced with it in a different way? where the environment in this theater production im in currently is actually overall very positive! i still often feel awkward where everyone is already good friends and knows one another from past productions but at the same time everyone is nice and friendly and no one is being nasty or weird to me like in the production i was in last year.

and our director and assistant director and the rest of the crew are really really sweet and encouraging and skilled people, i feel really thankful to be working with our director especially shes such a good actor along with being a good director and i value her input on things. which is why it makes it jarring to be given compliments by her and the other crew members and to be told that im a good actor and that im doing a good job. im so used to abuse from authority figures and so used to being told that im a worthless piece of shit etc etc that it comes as a shock when an authority figure in my life is actually kind to me.

and its been like. ive been having to step back and like. re examine just how badly i view myself. i have zero self esteem and zero confidence in myself, i speak very cruelly to myself and generally see myself as being a failure and other things like that, all of this is because ive been told that im a failure and disgusting ugly worthless stupid etc etc from both authority figures, my peers in school, my abuser, and my father throughout my entire life so ive internalized that and its almost impossible for me to break from thinking of myself in anything but that kind of light. but now ive been having to go. ok. i really respect this person who is telling me that im genuinely good at something. i want to believe them. i want to be good at what im doing. so this challenges the view of myself that ive been told is true for my entire life. i keep just going wait so am i not disgusting good for nothing ugly stupid worthless cant do anything right failure etc etc? and it shouldnt be so shocking that the things my abuser and the other people who have hurt and traumatized me have told me are wrong, but ive lived for so long thinking that all these things theyve said to me or said about me must be true. so again its really jarring to just be like. maybe all the awful things ive been told about myself were just very cruel people being cruel to me and not necessarily true.

but also at the same time i certainly dont think that those things being not true somehow makes me ~special~ i really dont think its possible for me to view myself as special or anything like that bc my view of myself is so low and negative and also bc i always want to be remembering other people and valuing everyone else yknow but its like. weird and strange for me to be realizing that maybe i dont suck as much as ive always been told and always believe. and maybe im not some horrible disgusting monster destined to be alone and abused forever, maybe im just a person. maybe im just a person who has been hurt a lot

but i also have to grapple with the fact that it is both true that 1. maybe im not inherently bad and maybe not everyone hates my guts and thinks im awful. but also 2. i am mentally and physically disabled as well as lgbt and there are a lot of times where people do in fact go out of their way to be cruel to me because of this and there will continue to be people who are cruel to me because of being disabled and being lgbt. these things can both be true

and alright i promise that im almost done rambling but one last thing i wish that all these years of abuse and torment and harrassment had somehow hardened me and to an extent i am kind of unphased by certain things but its more like i just fucking dissociate but anyway instead of abuse and trauma making me tough i just am so sensitive and always feel like im such a crybaby. i think i do a good job of not like making that other peoples problem i always try to suck it up but i always feel like i just am never able to grow thicker skin when it comes to very specific things that remind me of being abused. like i said our director is such a good director shes so sweet and kind and she did NOT at all say this in a mean way or mean to upset me. but last night she used me as an example where she said "im really a stickler about us saying the lines the exact way the playwright wrote them. rey i dont mean to single you out or bully you or anything like that, youre doing great, but youve been adding a 'but' to that line, lets cut out the but ok?" and again she is such a good director. she said this very kindly and i always appreciate her feedback and instruction. but feeling like im being singled out in front of people is such a big trigger for me and reminds me so much of past trauma and school abuse especially and it took every ounce of self control i had to not start crying and i just felt so humiliated about that. like why am i so sensitive. i know its because ive been abused my whole life but whats wrong with me. nothing bad happened and yet i felt like i wanted to die

anyway thanks if you read all this i prommy im fine im just feeling a lot of different things lately

[v-r-i-s-vris-v-r-i-s]

I LOVE BAD ART

hiii im thyme (ze/zir/they/them), one of the 4 ppl w accces to this acct, and sry for spelling, im dysgraphic + actualy typing and not using speach-to-text like normal

ANYWAYS

i LOVE bad art, and i HATE when ppl get upset i say that!

i grew up w a lot of pressuer on me to be good, definetly in general, but also absolutly w art!! my mom was an artist, and i grew up VERY christian. everything i did reflected on god, and more importantly to my mom, on her.

she was so exited to have a kid who LOVED art and stuff like her, but i was never good enough. she would always tell everyone how good i was, how i was gifted by god, and how much i took after her. (she was v self centered and would majorly talk up anything that made her look good, yikes i know)

so ppl would be naturaly interested and exited to see! and then i would be forced to show them some art, which, keep in mind, was verry age appropriate and full of the generally goofy stuff i loved, and 9/10 they would be dissapointed. even if they werent my mom decided to constantly pressure me to do better.

this was really stressful obv, and i stopped drawing for the first time. when i got into middle school, i started again, this time not really ttelling my mom. i was happier, but had already had it impressed down onto me that my art had to be good to warrant existing or taking my time. i was v stressed by it, and as i slowly started to get more comfortable i was imedietly bombarded with competition.

i struggled to get better in the ways that seemed easy for anyone else, PDA kicked in as soon as i felt something NEEDED to be done, and i was compaird to everyone my age and younger and told how much better theye were.

i never wanted to make it a competition, i just wanted to have fun. i wanted to do something hands on that could express me better than my words ever could (undiagnosed autism at the time made me feel verry weird and thuroughly broken, and explaining that wo imedietly getting invalidating and patronizing answers simply did not happen)

i stoped drawing again. i changed schools and had a better art teacher. she wasnt a dick bout my art, but definetly acted overly suportev(possibly im anxiose and projecting past art trauma onto her lmao and she was just being normal, she was cool af tho). i starded drawing more, on and offf, and got REALLY depressed and burnt out. one of the ways it manifested was being unable to be creative.

but things did get better!!! got an autism diagnosis and educated myself more on my dysgraphia diagnosis(got in elementry school), came out, made freinds who brought me to queer music and caberet shows(tysm phoenix), and was able to move out!

as im now on my own, my art drive has rissen signifigantly, especily as im surounded by other art enjoying weirdos(complementary). but i still hate when someone says that my art is good or bad. constructive advice and support is always valued, but there are so many mediums and people and styles, how on earth do we judge that?? having to be good enough for everyone to warent my own existance and hobbies almost killed me, and sucked all of the joy out of my life.

ive seen people who got so happy to doodle, only to stop forever when someone makes a remark on skill with their age. ive seen family stop bc someone joked abt their stick figures or car drawings, because even if the joker didnt mean it outside of a goofy remark, the joke was meanspirited and ment to put the artist down. I HATE THIS??!?!

WHO DECIDES WHATS GOOD ENOUGH TO EXIST??? capitilism? christianity? the example of two dead ppl from history???

obviosly i dont fuck w that.

art is something made to express something, how are you going to take such a broad catagory and shove it into your biased and sad binary?

so i proudly call my art bad. as an ongoing rebelion against everyone who thought and thinks that something has to fit their binary of goodto exist. i say bd to help myself unlearn the shitty things that were pushed onto me, and as a way of saying i dont have to be anyone's good to warent my own joy.

some ppl will cut in here, theyll tell me not to talk badly about myself (im not). theyl say even if i dont mean it bad, my brain will internalize it as a negative(i dont think that applies here?) or theyll spew some capitlistic bs (HUH, GUESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT.)

no hate to others reclaiming their art and love for it in different ways,this is just how it works for me. in in my art vocabulary, bad means not locking itself into the harsh expectations of good, and i find that incredibly freeing :)

#art #actually autistic #actually dysgraphic #I LOVE BAD ART #bad art #art rant #fuck capitalism

[radiantform]

havent made a rant in a while so maybe its time to let it rip

ppl wear masks now when they get sick, but like its odd to me because you're just breathing in all that sick air and making yourself more sick, and not exposing ppl to things doesn't actually do them any favors, its like how antibiotics or like heartworm medicine for dogs is not working anymore bec we rely on them too much, nature is intelligent and will adapt to anything, and especially something artificial, in order to have a fighting chance against an organism that is alive and adapting in this world you have to bring your own alive and adapting spirit to the table, and its not like we dont have things that can help, we do but those things have to be alive and adapting in the interaction, like a plant, medicinal herbs/tree barks/etc. If its manufactured in a laboratory its essentially static and dead and whatever virus, parasite, pathogen can just learn to evolve with it. The only way to get stronger is to go thru the fire...expose yourself and build your bodies strength by using plants. I guess its still so taboo to talk about this tho...ppl will straight up tell me they wear masks now when they are sick and im just like, omg in my head and I know they could never handle the conversation so i just dont say anything... why did we have to demonize the real hippies for 2 years in 2020, its insane, now we can never talk about anything and now, it just seems hard to have a relationship with someone when u cant be totally honest with them. There are so many things i just dont find interesting anymore...I can never really go back to who i use to be, its weird to think abt how much ive changed. I use to think I wanted to be a part of an artist community or music community or even activist community but every community i use to be a part of shunned any alternative thinking in 2020 and beyond and I just realized so much about our world during that time that now I just have values that beyond what most of those communities prioritize...like I'll always be an artist into weird music and standing up for poor working class ppl but I def dont think we can change anything thru the political system and I think Im so much more aware of how dark and unhealthy everything is and deciding to change my behavior and move towards creating a better world is the all encompassing priority now. I just feel so bad when I think about the younger generations... I feel like so many young ppl are so unhealthy and sick, poor, working shitty jobs and its so fucked up...we cant keep living like this, everyone needs to live in a better world its honestly the only thing that really matters to me. Im only interested in the deepest truths that can change the world, no matter how uncomfortable they are.

[the2amrevolution]

[Medical/emotional/social vent/dump/update]

Now that I'm recovered from covid (just a little lingering sinus drainage) and because I know being in public will only get worse until January, I went out in hopes of finding a final few easier to get in person than try to order/cheaper to go to the store rather than pay shipping items. I took a kn95 with me, plus have had surgical masks in my car the whole time. In less than two minutes wearing the kn95 I was overheating, feeling woozy, and sweating profusely. Tried switching to the other mask, but it didn't really help.

Two years ago I could walk around indoors, same type of clothes (shorts and a t-shirt because I literally can't wear anything else if Im moving or indoors or its above 50 degrees) with a surgical mask on and I would get sweaty, but it wasn't like this. My undergarments were completely soaked in sweat. My shorts and shirt were wet to the touch on the outside like someone who has been working out in the sun.

When I sit on the couch, I have to have a fan pointed at me or I will start sweating just sitting there. My hair and shirts are damp most times I wake up, and I can actually feel my body get hotter when I'm falling asleep. I can also feel the reverse when I wake up. Its like having cold water dumped on me on a hot summer day, except as I'm going inside, so I'm freezing for a little bit.

I'm banking a lot on my weird test results and working diagnoses being correct, because if I'm wrong, then, this time next year, I may not be able to leave the house at all. I also may not be able to be awake and able to stay awake long enough. My ability to drive hasn't been directly affected yet, but the act of driving is fatiguing and so I can't do it a lot in the same way that sitting upright on the couch doing a craft or playing a video game is fatiguing.

Because I got sick, plus the holidays making it more difficult to get appointments, I decided to take all of the supplements that either are directly the treatment for my working diagnoses (luckily prescriptions arent needed for these disorders like all my other ones) or have therapeutic value, and then pause them again once I get an appointment. I have a general idea of how fast my body burns through them versus the norm, so I have an idea when I need to stop taking them to have accurate results.

I dont have much idea of when to expect to see positive results. My next few months will be me waiting in limbo.

Tests may confirm the diagnoses or may not, but they can't say the diagnoses are wrong either. Treatment is the only sure way of knowing, I just want measurable data points to track.

I'm not active in the hobbies and communities I had been active in because I can't be anymore. Leaving the house for light shopping is about it beyond watching shows and being on my phone. Any art, crafts, video games, chores, etc. has to be balanced with sleeping. It's been extremely isolating having my disability worsen like this.

I was really enjoying myself in a small corner of a larger fan community. I wasnt expected to create anything or participate in any games or voice chats or watch parties. I could just enjoy SKZ and chat with the group. Then I was suddenly banned this week.

I hadn't been told I was at risk of being banned, and I tried hard to correct any time I was told I crossed a line in some way. I didn't argue. I didn't complain. I took note and moved on. Sadly, all I can figure is the line they had drawn for me was not the same as the line drawn for everyone else, and nothing I could have done would have changed that. So now I've been cut off from people that I was getting along with and have no explanation as to why I was subject to a different standard than the rest of the group at all. I had never been informed that anyone had an issue with me, and, like I said, when I was informed that I had broken a rule, I did my best to not do it again and to use clear rules available and what other posts were allowed as guidance.

I dont think I ever even had any topics/reasons in common across the posts that I had been told crossed the line. I don't even remember ever really disagreeing with anyone about anything even. Literally I can only think of two conversations where someone maybe could have even thought I disagreed with them, but I also remember emphasizing that I agreed with them on the point they had made to begin with. So, my pov was "yes, I agree/that's true/you aren't wrong. This is information that may be /why/ xyz happened or /if/ this other thing had been the case then it could be different but its not or this is a personal experience that has similarity to yours that I am using to demonstrate why I agree about Point."

It felt like I was back in high school all of a sudden except I cannot think of any reason anyone would have to deliberately twist what I've said or if something I said made them doubt my character so much, why I couldnt have been given opportunity to try to sort things out. When I was banned, I had not done anything wrong between that moment and the last thing I'd said that got removed - which, again, was not related to any other post that I had had removed, I realized how it could get misunderstood, and I didn't argue about it. I reworded what I had wanted to say, and that wording was well within allowed content and would require deliberately applying a meaning that I never said to be anywhere in the realm of rule breaking. At that point I wasn't given a final warning, and if I had been, directly according to the person who deleted that post, I didn't do anything wrong when I was banned - the ban was for things prior and "making several people uncomfortable" which is what I can't help but question the veracity of seeing as I was never given a chance change whatever caused that nor had anyone I'd interacted with privately seemed to have any issues with me.

I did express that I felt like I was being judged differently than others and gave specific examples after being banned. I also pointed out that if people had complaints about me, I had never been made aware of them, so I had no opportunity to do anything about it. I literally did everything I could to stay as in the rules and be as respectful as possible to everyone. I had no beef with anyone. But, idk, egg on my face I guess.

Anyway, I really need to be right and for this treatment to work or I'm going to be the most isolated I have ever been in my life, and I dont do well when isolated.

#my life #discord stuff in case you noticed or wondered #medicine #disability #mental health

[doubtfultaste]

so this is the most mysogynystic shit i've seen in a while, and i watched dude bro party massacre III just the other day.

see i want to write more about stuff i think so yeah, the whole horror genre has always been the one i am the most into since my pre-teen years, and only recently, looking back at things and revisiting movies i watched growing up, i realise how mysoginistic it is and has been since the early days. yeah sure, i know this one is specially bad at that subject, and yeah horror movies were a certain way because movies in general were a certain way and society itself was a certain way. it's just easier to spot things in this genre because there's a pattern were women are constantly the favorite chosen victims pretty much since forever, and it was never taboo to advertise the movies as such until recent years. mysogyny based strategies such as naked/bikini chicks used to be a common way to sell everything back in the day, now too ofc but lesser in serious brands/types of media and it won't help much if there's no real value to the product being sold, unless the product is the girl and the advertising is for her onlyfans profile. now, despite the fact the world is going to hell, information spreads fast and people are woke and have common sense, even though not all of them have good intentions.

might have talked too much and said nothing, but sometimes i look at all these horror movies that i've been exploring for more than half the time i've been alive and it seems shallow and goofy. and that's weird and sometimes confuses me because i dont see myself as being like that, even though i dedicate a lot of my time to exploring the genre. that's what happens when i started as a horror fan and developed into what is closer to a weird film connoisseur since i gradually started detaching more from genre movies and started looking for sensations in other genres and places of life. i don't love this movie, and i don't love a lot of the movies that i post here, and that's not the point of me posting them. i did love watching it even though (or because?) it's silly as hell and it's got all the campy shit i grew living for. yes this is part of my taste, but i dont necessarily love it. i can have a great ass time watching a movie that i'd rate it 2 out of 5 , it's just a matter of making sense to me. one can't be serious all the time and i'll always have a dark bottomless hole in my heart for shit like this. there has to be a balance, watch all the crappy shit you want but always try to educate yourself the best you can, by watching a little bit of everything and of course living a life outside your room and beyond your bubble. and read books too, that's a good habit that i might have found a little late, but at least im still young. above all things, try to enjoy life.

#doghouse #me #talk #text #2009 #mysogyny #horror #personal

[semi-imaginary-place]

the diofield chronicle ch 7

how did empire forces get so far into diofield. their ships only ever landed on the south and east costs but somehow there's encampments all over diofield? weird.

yeah fredret is like cracking under the weight of his own expectations, he's much harsher, desperate? fevered? now. and andrias is also acting odd, frustrated? resigned? an odd meeting over all defeating the remnants.

yeah they both seem more hostile towards each other and i dont know why. really what has gotten into them, why has fredret abandoned strategy

yeah rigyare strand was bait. persona bait too.

the noble who raised andrias was important! still dont know who. when andrias says fred is the same person it sounds like he's repeating a line.

so they did plan to kill them all anyways treaty or no treaty. good to know that is a story about grey vs grey there's at least one black. where's andrias in this final battle.

wow its taken me to long to realize that zevatian is coverart dude. yeah I got spoiled on that ending bit. nice bit of foreshadowing earlier about andrias valuing only power. did he choose the empire because they were stronger?

A one of my bigger complaints is that the game lacked a few lines about fred's change after assuming the throne. I would have liked that to have been fleshed out a bit more, like is it the pressure and power of the position getting to him?

andrias changes are easier to follow the logic of as his big plans entered their endgame and crunch time is on. Though I do wonder how necessary it all was. There must have been plenty of ways to draw out zevatian and if he didn't think fred worthy there was no reason to set him up as king (i think this was mainly to put himself in a better position). im assuming the empire planted him originally for levantia's assassination, i wonder if he kept receiving orders after that. Would they really just let go a highly trained agent to go live in the countryside instead of repositioning him back into court? oh an option could be andrias was genuinely on alletain's side up until fredret became king at which point he became disillusioned with him and alletain in general.

Over all this game is decent but not great (cant speak about gameplay since i only played the tutorial map and it didn't jive with me). I found the plot to be interesting but i like political dramas. rather than have some 16 playable characters I think with its limited development resources they should have focused on fewer characters that were more fleshed out. gameplay wise it seemed a little redundant too since you can only deploy 4(8) at a time, a large chunk just wont be used. i find it interesting that in this game everyone gets along less the further into the game you get. not that many games go this path (rdr2 off the top of my head).

i don't know what happens to iscarion so im gonna choose to live in the reality where he's alright and off being robin hood or something.

oh also i wish they had used the 3 modeling artists that made tales of arise, that style of character model would have better fit the character illustrations.

its weird how few people have played this game its not a masterpiece but its not a bad game (well not that i played it either really jsut watched ~10 different playthroughs to get all the dialogue)

#the diofield chronicle

[midnightmisadventures]

Hi just woke up from the weirdest dream

You won't believe this bullshit. It was about Oliver!?!? Oliver fucking Tree. Like what the fuck, im sorry what????

Bro why, im so confused lmao. Basically, I lived in the college, state college dreamscape. But whatever, one night Me and claire and oliver were up talking on the phone late. And it was like zoom or video chat but we didnt have our cameras on and we were up late laughing like it was fucking quarantine. Like......i just straight up dont have any precedent for it

And i def knew it was out of the ordinary, cause i was trying to find a way to tweet about it through twitter circle cause i know people would literally be fiending to figure out why i was talking to oliver. Like i was gonna tweet "lmao was not expecting to talk with Oliver Tree about hunters mom" cause apparently we were, idk. It was crazy, and we were FLIRTY AND CUTE. Like what whyyyy

Literally up to the wee hours of the night, like 3am, giggling like a little school girl cause im flirting with Oliver. I was JUST talking (with myself) about how im so generally uninterested in him. Like i cannot believe he takes up so much space on miss midnight missy, like i dont feel for him. And also this isnt the first dream i had thats Oliver adjacent where Claire is also there?

Like i wrote on here before how i felt like Liam was spying on me to see what my feelings were about Oliver and claire was used as a vessel for me to spill my guts with and i took note of that as in, if that was Liams doing it was evidence that he knew about double cross and not to use bff cause i wouldnt be honest.

But at least in that dream we were directly talking about Oliver versus Liam, like this one Liam was no where to be found or mentioned

I was also back in the trenches lmao meaning that like underground food court thats always in my dream. ALwyas always always. Trying to figure out what to eat and ending up on chick fila cause they were about to close and although i wanted to check out other options i didnt want to lose out on chick fila

So i get in the check fila line cause i think they closed at 5:30, im one of the last people in. I want a large meal but they were out of large trays and like large fry containers?? So you could only get medium items for some reason. So i was like....can i get "two medium fries then" like i was really craving fries so i was like uh can i just do that? And the student worker was like uh yea,

Then as im going to check out she pulls me aside and is like "hey you actually cant get two" but whispers to me, "we're about to close, so meet me in the alley right after closing and i'll give you more fries for free" so i was okay okay haha. Then i asked for chick fila sauce and she gave me polynesian

As a matter of fact, I went down to the food court with OOF, yea go look that one up in the blog if u need to jog ur memory. For some reason he was there and i was trying to avoid him and stay out of his way cause i didnt want drama, so he was on the phone walking one way so i skirted down the hill to go to the food court and then he kept following me. And i was like bro wtf. So now we had to make small talk and we get to the food court and he's like "omg thats the asian restuarant where Oliver did THIS" idk he had some nostalgia value to it, and he was like "do you think thats the place?" it was called SOX and it was asian cuisine sort of like a panda but a little more authentic. And i was trying to get rid of him so i was like "uh maybe go check it out" like i could literally care less. So he went to the asian place.

After i got my food, i was looking for a place to eat just like i was in the hub.

There was more nostalgia related squad and SPA stuff but i cant really remember. Mostly just trippin about having feels for Oliver. We even went over some of the classic dreamscape in the sense that like.....we were talking about the different classroom buildings for pr and Olis major and.....whatever it was weird

Final component, was since claire was there when i was talking to Oli. Somehow she got some notification on the most off chance that basically led her to midnight missy. And i was like "fuckkkkk" but she was like "is this you?" and i was like......yea but....fuck, yea thats me.

But please please please, like ur the only one who has ever seen it. So please dont tell anyone, and i was like brb im gonna go lock it so no one can see. And she was like no i wont tell anyone but also made it clear that like......she was excited to go throughhhh it and that drove me nuts. Overall i was much more lax about it then i think i would be in real life. Spirit give me signs if midnight missy is in danger of a security breach. I'll lock her up lol don't test me. I've said a lot on here recently.

Oh wait i lied, final final component. Was that i was on video chat with Jack Harlow and we were kinda being flirty and cute. And it was for a spa reason but i got to do it somehow and we were in the chip office. I recorded the call? I think, but didnt get a chance to record on my phone a reaction of him seeing a video or something where all of us members were talking about him. Cause he ate that up and when i told people i got to see jack harlow react to us, everyone was mad 1) that i showed him and 2) that i didnt film his reaction. But i was like sorry i didnt want to be weird and take my phone out and also i didnt think it would be a big deal to show him he literally BEGGED me, and it was Jack Harlow like.....couldnt really say no

Anyway, guess im gonna go check up on Oli

[britneyshakespeare]

man it really bothers me when ppl who know pretty much nothing about me call me pretty. it’s like yeah what does it fucking matter.

#one of my girls at my job has some... problems in common i dealt w as a kid #im thinkin about it #tales from diana #man. kids who call other kids fat. shut the fuck up #they should NOT be raised to think unsolicitedly commenting on ppl's bodies is acceptable. #not to like. call myself gorgeous or smth but puberty treated me well. compared to what i got as a child. #and im generally used to it now. in a weird way. i dont value my appearance but im aware of how im perceived. #i can very much tell when im being treated like a Pretty Girl wo the person having to say outright 'youre pretty' #usually when it comes out im like 'yeah. i know *you* think im pretty' and i think abt it all the time bc. how devastating would that be #for a man to hear. pretty sure it would make one disintegrate. #this that beat that make ya bump ya bump oooh i give ya whatcha want #yeah i resent hearing almost anyone tell me what *they* think *i* look like. to the point where my mom kinda teases me for it #and i really don't like it. #ppl who know me well. will precede their compliment on my appearance w a disclaimer like 'and i know u wont really appreciate it but...' #that's how you know i appreciate it. when you know i won't appreciate it. #it's like wow. you're signaling you actually value my opinions and feelings beyond your own perception of them? that makes it ok #but u'd have to know me on a deeper level to know my ambivalence to certain kinds of 'kind' comments. bc obviously i dont just snap at ppl #anyway that doesn't really matter. i don't like any compliments that are delivered like the complimenter is doing you a favor. or whatever #and usually when ppl try to make you feel attractive that's what they're doing.

[insertdisc5]

Hi!! I wanted to ask, in celebration of Deltarune CH. 2, do you have any updated thoughts and head canons about the game?? Like, y'know, similar to a previous ask about Kris in your Deltarune tag? Thanks!

thoughts on kris part 2 i guess???? (part 1 from ch1 here lol)

spoilers for deltarune like woah. this wont be kris focused just random thoughts on everything. thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk

not that many thoughts for this chapter tbh! EDIT LOL: this was a lie i have a lot of thoughts

-just in general i feel like the player isn't the only one controlling kris... like yes the player forced kris to do what happened in the snowgrave route but AT THE SAME TIME idk it feels like there's someone else too. just because of the terrifying voice i suppose. and also the jerky movement kris does every time they get their soul out? unless there's another reason for it... maybe getting your soul out means you walk weird lol

-BUT ALSO i feel like kris is 100% in control when they create fountains. idk it just makes sense kris would create them. to create another world, a better world, A WORLD WHERE THEIR BROTHER IS HERE PERHAPS? i do wonder why they get their soul out then though. i'm all for it sweetie! do whatever! i support you!

-(i am and will be playing deltarune with only kris' best interests in mind. i will not hurt anyone unless kris wants me to. dont worry my little meow meow im on your side! talk to me! no? okay ill stay under the sink its fine)

-speaking of asriel. SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER (starts crying) V-VACATION COLLEGE WHEN

-kris misses their brother so much it's so sad. if you make kris steal 5$ from asriel they take it "reluctantly"? talking to asriel online so often even alphys knows?? the google search?? GOING INTO ASRIEL'S GOOGLE SEARCH ROOM WITH THEIR EYES CLOSED BECAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THEY ALREADY KNOW WHATS IN THERE? THAT ONE IS LESS OF A MISSING THING BUT IM LIKE OH MY GOD

-the city walk with susie at the end makes it clear to me that kris really values susie's friendship... kris even sits with her if you spend long enough near the lake like aaaaah ;_;

-and even in snowgrave you spend your last acts with the final boss calling for your friends like YES there's a way bigger creepy aspect to this (kris as more of a Leader who Commands and commands their subjects to come) but still :'0 (and then noelle answers oh my god noelle im so sorry for the trauma)

-berdly. listen. listen. listen. liste

-berdly sucks but [berdly hurts his arm in the battle against queen if you don't save him because he doesnt want to hurt you] [berdly realizing smg's wrong in snowgrave and immediately taking steps to save noelle] berdly is my little crumb nugget. i will protect him.

-noelle. noelle. girlboss!

-like ooooh listen. hearing about the genocide path for undertale. made me go "that is SO COOL. i HAVE to experience it myself this is great. hehehe killing time" and like no regrets. i was fully enjoying the experience knowing i was an awful person. SNOWGRAVE THOUGH. i will never try this myself its too fucked up. casually grooming your childhood friend to murder people <3 and also acting like a weird stalker towards her <3 stockholm syndrome speedrun i will get all the info i can about this but i will never do this myself

-people remarking the kris/player>noelle relationship is similar to the relationship between player>chara in genocide path is like yes. chefs kiss. don't worry we just are making you stronger and everything will be fine "you made me kill my friend? and for what?" this is fine sweetie don't worry about it!!!!!!

-like the amount of details added to snowgrave, like if you equip noelle's watch she notices later? and her battle animations change as time goes on, she gets an ice shield and stops sighing in relief after battle? oh my god? oh my god.

-(berdly is not awake.) JUST KILL ME RIGHT HERE I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT BERDLY NOT BEING AWAKE!!!!!

-also why didnt he turn into dust. so many possible reasons. is magic a thing in the normal world and perhaps no magic means no dust (theres graves). maybe he isnt dead. maybe hes braindead. maybe he'll come back. either way that boy is now in the closet big enough to put someone in

-also dess' name probably being december AND THATS WHY NOELLE LOST THE SPELLING BEE?!?!??! FUCK ME UP!!!!! JUST FUCK ME UP!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

-also so many good pixel art this chapter. too many? i didnt need pixel art of cardboard noelle falling on the statue. like thank you but please. please it hurts my game artist brain.

-the expressions in this chapter were also top notch. all the unsettling noelle expressions like (i fall over face first)

-i threw away the ball of junk (which i already tried in ch1) and this time the game was like "ARE YOU SURE BC THIS IS A BAD IDEA" and kris felt bitter :'( (it deletes all your items in the dark world)

-i uh fucked up and skipped the susie+noelle scene bc listen last time ralsei mentionned seeing what susie is doing we missed some PRIMO LORE. turns out it just makes you skip the scene and you dont get anything new. welp

-speaking of ralsei well you know. he exists. but im stuck on him going "i just wonder what being ralsei-like even is...?" ralsei my dude there's so much i could say about this. do you feel like you can't be ralsei-like because you feel like you have to be asriel-like

-but also that makes no sense bc susie hasnt even mentioned ralsei looks like asriel. and i cant imagine asriel being so meek. so WHAT GIVES

-ralsei as kris’ “i wish i was a monster just like my bro and family and i’d look like asriel but with red horns [THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME] and my name would be something cool like ralsei instead of a boring human name like kris and im sweet and cute because thats how i act with asriel because ASRIEL MADE ME” theory because that would be cute.

-ASRIEL GOING TO THE CHURCH TO CONFESS HIS "SINS" WHEN "SINS" AREN'T A THING IN THE ANGEL BELIEF LIKE I KNOW THIS INTERACTION WAS TREATED AS A JOKE BUT WHAT THE FUCK ASRIEL?

-kris definitely has a connection with the big red door in the city, judging by what the kids say they probably went there... i feel like this place's dark world will be the Final Dungeon you KNOW some shit happened there. also the sounds you hear when you go there is the phone dark world call's sound slowed down? AND AFTER SNOWGRAVE APPARENTLY YOU CANT HEAR IT ANYMORE? HUWAH?

-speaking of songs the songs were all so good, My Castle Town rules, the berdly snowgrave music is stuck in my head, flashback is uwah wuahah, Until Next Time is so good, AND ALSO A FRIEND NOTICED THE DARK WORLD CITY THEME IS JUST tHE SONG 74 (MOST NOTICEABLE WITH THE SNOWGRAVE VERSION)?????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN????? it might be just "hey its just reuse" BUT MR FOX YOU KNOW WE'RE GONNA READ INTO THIS IS NOELLE THE ONE SINGING IDK BRO!!!!!!!!!!

-asgore dreemurr fired from the force what happun!!!!! game theory is that asgore is related to dess' death/disappearance but eh who knows

-you start the chapter at lvl2 and get to lvl3 after the final boss, a friend mentioned this is probably because we destroyed a world and im :0

-to go back to kris it's still so interesting to figure out who they are based on how they act/people mention them. like kris shaking the ferris wheel car? yeah makes sense i can imagine a pranking kid do this. kris' dance? yeah thats a little silly but i can buy it. doing cool anime poses? well i dunno this doesnt line up PERFECTLY but sure. BUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN SNOWGRAVE... especially >proceed like that is such a weird thing that i can't imagine them doing, but i can't completely see the "player" doing either (compare with going to sans -which kris doesnt know- and going "SANS!" because of course the player would know sans), like THATS one of the reasons i feel like there's someone else in there. the weird robotic merciless actions. if im going super meta it feels like there'd be someone else like writing the choices into existence for us to pick you know? gaster probably? god i need to read more gaster theories i completely sidestepped the gaster shit bc i wasnt interested. anyway just spitballing

-(looks at big shot guy) please dont make him the next tumblr guy i beg you

-obligatory "queen was great" mention if only because this part made me laugh a little bit too hard

that was a lot. thank you for letting me talk

#ask tag #deltarune #deltarune spoilers #snowgrave spoilers

[dootdootwriting]

CONGRATS FOR 600+!!! I SAW UR EVENT SO IF I HAVE THE CHANCE, IM TAKING IT

The whole alphabet for Thoma. (Gn reader)

PLEASE dont overwork yourself though. You dont have to do it all if youre tired or something. Thank you and congrats!

600+ writing event

ty for ur request anon!! also you're funny. overwork myself? how could i possibly do that when i'm already avoiding all of my schoolwork? entire alphabet for thoma coming right up! (under the cut for length)

fluff alphabet with thoma; gn reader; no warnings apply

A-Activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?)

- thoma enjoys pretty much any type of shared activities with you, but ultimately his favorite kind is any that involves food. he'll go on tours of inazuma city with you to find the best places to get ice cream, or he'll buy a whole bunch of food and see what kind of dishes you can make together! nine times out of ten it ends up being really weird and a little gross, but it's fun and he loves spending time with you.

B-Beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?)

- he admires your ambition, your humor, and your own personal flair. he loves the person you are, and almost everything that goes into that, but he specifically loves the unique little traits that make you you.

C-Comfort (how would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?)

- his first instinct is to give you a big hug or rub your back, but only if he knows you're okay with it and that it would actually help. his first goal is to make sure you're okay, and then his second goal is to cheer you up: with bad jokes and kisses, usually

D-Dreams (how do they picture the future with their s/o?)

- thoma isn't super picky with how you two end up in the future, as long as you're together and happy. he wants to grow old with you, ideally, though however you do that will decide itself.

E-Equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship or rather passive?)

- thoma is used to taking the lead in your relationship, but he's not necessarily more dominant or anything - he's just excited to be with you and wants to make sure you're just as happy as he is. your relationship is pretty balanced!

F-Fun (what do they do for fun with their s/o? what's their idea of a fun day out?)

- he loves loves loves going out on walks, especially in the city, and just finding random things that seem fun to do. there are a bunch of people playing cornhole over there, how about you guys join in for a game? they're selling a new kind of hotpot at that restaurant, better give it a try!

G-Gratitude (how grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?)

- he's definitely aware of everything you do for him, and he's also very grateful that you're with him. he makes sure to let you know that every day.

H-Honesty (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?)

- i think the only time thoma would ever keep something from you on purpose is if it would be somehow dangerous for you to know. other than that, he likes to make sure you're aware of everything you need to be. he likes his privacy like anyone else, but he also values communication.

I-Inspiration (did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?)

- being with you hasn't necessarily changed him (aside from the fact that you two are almost always seen together now) but it's definitely improved his mood a lot, not that it was ever really bad. he also likes to show off more now that you're around...

J-Jealousy (do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?)

- thoma gets jealous relatively easily but is also not one to step in unless it's a situation in which you seem uncomfortable. he trusts you wholeheartedly, which sometimes means he has to keep himself from getting overly worried.

K-Kisses (are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?).

- he's a very good kisser. thoma's kisses are playful and sweet, or alternatively full of reassurance and love. your first kiss was a little rushed and he was a little nervous (not that he'd ever admit that) but he knew it was the right time.

L-Love confession (how would they confess to their s/o?)

- confesses accidentally while watching you do something that's actually pretty normal. you tap him on the shoulder and ask where he wants to go for lunch and he just kinda stares at you and then says "man i love you" and you're like. what. but he plays it off like he TOTALLY MEANT to say that and definitely didn't slip up.

M-Mornings (what's it like waking up with them? do they sleep late or wake up before the sun rises?)

- lazy lazy lazy. thoma knows he has to go to work but why would he do that when you're next to him all curled up into him? he can't just abandon you like that! fortunately the kamisatos are very forgiving, so when he shows up late they don't give him an earful.

N-Nicknames (what do they call their s/o?)

- babe/baby, sunshine, and occasionally sweetheart but usually just to tease you

O-On cloud nine (what are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?)

- when thoma first realizes he's in love with you it hits him like a truck and he has to sit down for a second to process it. after that he hangs around you a lot more often, and it's pretty obvious to anyone watching that he's in love.

P-PDA (how are they with PDA? is it fun to them or are they more reserved with their affection?)

- thoma's comfortable with pda and likes to tease you with it sometimes, unless you're someone who absolutely hates it, in which case he'll settle with handholding. otherwise, he'll give you random light kisses on the cheek or will grab you and pull you into him at random points throughout the day.

Q-Quirk (some random thing they do when they're with you for no reason in particular)

- his nose scrunches when he's trying not to laugh at you, which makes you laugh at him, which makes him laugh at you. congratulations! you have achieved pile of laughter.

R-Romance (how romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?)

- thoma is very romantic and also values friendship with his partner as well. he's sort of a mix between cliché and creative - while he will definitely take you out for a fancy dinner and lend you his jacket, he will also take you out to the lake and push you in or make a date out of who can spot the most dogs on a day out.

S-Support (are they helping their s/o achieve their goals do they believe in them?)

- one hundred percent he believes in you and will do his best to help you achieve any goals you have. ok thats the end of this headcanon i have nothing else to say GHCCN

T-Thrill (do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship or do they prefer certain routine?)

- thoma loves trying new things! he doesn't need things to change constantly (and also that might be very tiring for him) but he does like to switch things up a little.

U-Understanding (how good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?)

- forgot to change it from "good" to "well." WHOOPS. anyway

- thoma is very empathetic, so he's quick to understand how you're feeling, though it'll take him a little longer to understand why it is you're feeling like that. once you explain to him, he knows just what to do, whether it be celebrate with you on a big win or comfort you or give you some space.

V-Value (how important is the relationship to them? What is its worth in comparison to other things in their life?)

- it's SO important to him. having you in his life is one of the most important things to him. he's also been with the kamisatos for a really long time though, so thoma will need a little bit to sort out where his priorities are. rest assured that you're definitely up there.

W-Wild card (a random fluff headcanon?)

- thoma really likes the feeling of you running your fingers through his hair. bonus points if you wash it for him (he'll return the favor)

X-XOXO (Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?)

- if you're ever available for affection, thoma will take advantage of it. he loves being close to you and generally just the feeling of loving and being loved in return, especially when that incorporates physical affection. listen he just really likes being kissed.

Y- Yearning (how will they cope when they are missing their partner?)

- when you're gone thoma will surround himself with things that remind him of you. he'll also occasionally call your name or say things to you absentmindedly before remembering you're not there at present. poor guy... he'll be very happy once you're home.

Z-Zeal (are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind?)

- it depends on the lengths. the worst case scenario for thoma would be if he somehow had to choose between you and his work - that would terrify him, even though there's no way it would ever happen. other than that, since you're way up on his priority list, there's not much that he wouldn't do for you.

#doot's 600 event! #thoma x reader #tohma x reader #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #fluff alphabet #fluff #thoma hcs #thoma fluff alphabet #thoma #tohma #gi thoma

[bitchesgetriches]

this isnt... exactly money related but yall give good advice so i hope u dont mind: I have a chinese name and I'd prefer to use my full name with people im not friends with. but people that I interact with for work tend to see my email sign off and just use half the name. (I'll use a generic name here: if my name was Lim Jia Xin they'd just be calling me Jia(a nickname) while my actual name is Jia Xin, which I put in the email signature. I AM grateful that they don't just use Lim though) Do you think its worth trying to correct them, especially since rn my entire job experience(im unemployed but trying) consists of mostly emailing people one time anyway so it doesnt matter that much i guess? I cant think of any way to make my name preference clear in the initial email :(

My darling bumble bee, we are ALWAYS happy to opine on navigating workplace weirdness. This is a pickle indeed!

My first instinct is to suggest your name appear in your signature like this: 

Lim Jia Xin 

(please call me Jia Xin) 

Or, you could have your full name in the signature, but above that, sign the emails with “Jia Xin.” This will be a clearer indication of what they should call you. Make sense? 

While you may only have one email interaction with these people, your name is important to you, and it can hurt when it’s disregarded. Don’t invalidate your own feelings! You want to be addressed by YOUR NAME. That is a perfectly reasonable desire.

If anyone asks for clarification in conversation, you make a simple explanation and then pivot to a new topic without giving them a chance to challenge you. For example: “My name is Chinese, and the surname comes first. So call me by my given name, Jia Xin. It’s kinda like Mary Anne in English. You wouldn’t just call her Mary or Anne, right? Now let’s talk about these quarterly reports...” 

Good luck, kiddo. Here’s some further reading for you:

Woke at Work: How to Inject Your Values into Your Boring, Lame-Ass Job

[rainbowsky]

Final round-up of fan fic asks

I've gotten a few more interesting responses to the fan fic discussion so I'm going to round them all up here. This will be my final post on the topic until/unless there's a dramatic new development, or a particularly notable response I want to highlight. Thanks to everyone who brought their thoughts and experiences to the topic. I hope everyone at least feels heard.

The biggest piece of advice that I would like to offer is for everyone to focus on what they love rather than what they hate. If we all did that, the world would be a better place. Alongside that, I'd like to remind everyone to please support authors whose work you like. It's so important. Give them a kudos, give them a nice comment, recommend their work to others. You never know what kind of grief and harassment they are dealing with to bring you these great stories, and our support means a lot.

This is in reference to previous posts here and here.

Anonymous asked:

With regard to fandom and fan fic issue, my years of experience being part of very large fandoms has led me to believe that big accounts are v important in facilitating and enforcing the general consensus of the whole fandom. Unless there will be big accs who'll remind everyone of being respectful & just not being a dick over other's preferences, nothing will change.

This is also the reason why I think certain solo fandoms have adapted weird and twisted narratives as their general fandom story because no big acc has tried to police them & and say hey pls be rational. Whether we like it or not, in a place where how far voices, ideas, tweets, posts get heard is based on the number of followers you have, big accs will have the power and influence in creating/curating/shifting the narratives.

So, if you want to know why your/our fandom thinks like this in general, look at what big accs are tweeting/posting, look at what ideas & values they follow, look at their preferences or how strongly they react to certain situations. it's taxing and toxic for big accs given the nature of social media these days, but it's also the reality of system, the more followers/audience you have, the more influence you will have.

So to anyone reading this I hope we all practice more restraint and reflection before we post anything. Remember that words, no matter what medium you write it in, will always carry weight.

So true. It is easy - even for myself who spends a fair chunk of time answering people's asks - to forget that people can sometimes be impressionable and what we say can influence people whether that's our intent or not. I get used to thinking of myself as a regular guy just doing my own thing when sometimes my thoughts and words go well beyond where I initially posted them.

I think it's important for us to be careful what we say, and it's equally important to be careful what we take from what other people say. Especially when it comes to big claims. Always get a second, third, fourth opinion and don't be afraid to ask for clarification if something doesn't sit right or sounds confusing.

It's also important to reflect on how our words and actions might affect other people's experience of fandom, and err on the side of 'live and let live' wherever possible. It's great to have our own preferences and to champion them, but we should try to do so in a way that leaves space for other people and perspectives.

The more unique perspectives and the more friendly, open dialog there is, the healthier the community will be as a whole.

There's nothing wrong with encouraging and guiding growth in the particular areas we are interested in, as long as it doesn't step on, oppress or attack those who are peacefully enjoying something different.

Anonymous 2 asked: bjyx fans attacking gdgdbaby for including zsww/lsfy dynamics in an event named bjyx then turning right around and attacking the zsww/lsfy event organizer for excluding bjyx? god, can you hear my facepalm and sigh of resignation and incredulity from over there? im genuinely not surprised that they're trying to drive an entire part of the fandom out by disgusting them (and me) with these immature tactics. i believe what im about to say next will sound quite bait-y and i respect your decision 1/?

should you choose not to post this. but i do know that it is not only me, in fact there are many out there, that is of this opinion. we just dont talk about it on twitter to avoid the potential mess it will bring lol. okay, here goes nothing. (do note that im talking about the majority here, not every single person is like this) so bjyx fans tend to be cishet females whereas zsww/lsfy fans are more diverse in terms of age and gender, and most of them are part of the queer community too 2/?

i would like to clarify that most of these zsww/lsfy fans are not dynamic exclusive (in the sense that they are friendly and interact with all ggdd fans) they just prefer to "identify" themselves as zsww/lsfy fans (on twitter specifically) just to form a distinction from bjyx fans who mostly are dynamic exclusive (as in; they do not consume non-bjyx content, and straightup refuse to interact with non-bjyx fans, often blocking them). as a result, id say that the zsww/lsfy communiy is way more 3/?

mature and respectful (after all, they're mostly queer people talking about a queer ship) whereas many problems in this fandom, such as the homophobia, adamantly insisting on "drawing lines" between dynamics, stem from the bjyx exclusive fans, comprised of cishet females who "may not know better". so, it is of no surprise to me that they're resorting to these immature tactics of calling gg unsavory names, and organizing retaliatory events with controversial topics in an attempt to "purify". 4/4

I trust that you have arrived at that theory through your own experience and observation. I haven't personally spent much time immersed in this stuff so I can't claim to have any real insight or expertise. If you say that's your experience of it, then at the very least that's how you've seen things up to this point.

I just want to say that I think we should always be careful about making assumptions about people's age, gender/gender identity, etc.

There are plenty of good reasons to avoid doing that; because those assumptions could be very wrong, because those assumptions are often laced with ageism, sexism, etc., because those assumptions - even when correct - might not be an accurate basis for the conclusions we draw.

But the primary reason I recommend avoiding those type of assumptions is because anything that enables us to clump a group of people together in our minds like that will tend to make them easier to demonize and dehumanize. They are no longer individuals who are each responsible for their own unique perspectives, they are now 'the X group' who is known for 'A B C series of easily attackable ideas or behaviors'.

If we attribute undesirable traits and behaviors to a group of people we feel opposed to in some way, that makes us feel more righteous and justified in behaving unfairly toward them, dismissing their humanity and warring with them. It's just risky behavior to engage in, even when it's well-intentioned.

There might actually be some truth to what you're saying. It could very well be that most of these people are young, inexperienced, heteronormative, etc. but if that's the case then we should try to use those traits to better understand and empathize rather than to better dismiss and discredit.

Just my two cents on that.

It can be really frustrating dealing with what feels like other people attacking us, trying to oppress us, etc. - especially when there are more of them than there are of us. In my experience the best solutions to that sort of problem are generally the ones that focus on what we are doing and want to do rather than what they are doing that we don't want them to do.

As I am always preaching, we can't control what other people say, do or think. The only thing we have any control over is what we say, do and think (and how we respond to what they say, do and think).

I have found in my experience that the moment I step out of a conflict mindset and instead step into a problem-solving mindset, everything starts to come together. I feel better, my outlook is more positive, I can begin to see solutions and allies rather than problems and enemies, and most of all, I become more focused on what I am doing than what others are doing.

So I would recommend everyone who is invested in resolving these conflicts focus on that. "How can we best showcase and encourage the types of stories we enjoy?" instead of "How can we stop these other people from doing things we dislike?"

Anonymous 3 asked:

Hello again! It’s anon #3 from the fanfic post. I really do appreciate reading your thoughts on various issues like this, so thank you for always taking time to write in depth. As for supporting without going to war, the simplest way has always been to just show appreciation for the creators, hype them up. Kudos are the easiest way on ao3 but comments in addition are great. This goes for all content—art, fics, vids..etc. Creators love to see and read how people react to their content. Sharing is also great, fic recs are very helpful, just be cautious with art and reposting though. Hope this helps a bit!

Thanks so much, Anon. I think this is excellent advice. And it's true that appreciation is great, but helping to expand the audience is also great. Recommending stories, pointing people to the pages/websites of artists we like (as opposed to reposting), sharing our own ideas and approaches, encouraging people to try new things... all of this helps build healthier communities.

And here's another one: WRITE! DRAW! CREATE!

I urge anyone with creative interests or talents to bring their voices to the community because we all can benefit from hearing from you.

Thanks again everyone for sharing your thoughts on this issue. I hope that over time we can all work in positive ways to improve the situation.

I think this subject has been well-covered now so I'm going to retire it for the time being. If anyone still feels they want to discuss it further please feel free to message me privately. Thanks.

#fan fiction #fandom reflections #ask

[lesbiradshaw]

Genuinely interested in what you think about Bucky being perceived as female-coded in some parts of the fandom. I read that thread years ago and agreed with because it sounded logical, but now I'm not so sure. Recently found out about the existence of this Tony Stark meta essay called "Tony Stark as the most female-coded superhero" and they use the same arguments: loss of agency, playing the damsel in distress role more often than their counterpart, etc. I can't take "fm-coded" seriously anymore

oh boy ...

idk how long this will end up but to preface whatever we do end up with: 1) im a nonbinary lesbian so my perception on what it means to be a woman and femininity in general is not going to be what a lot of other peoples is and 2) im a few months out from getting a degree in gender studies. take that for what you will. no i will not be arguing about this in my inbox.

to be frank, in my opinion, bucky being female coded is bullshit. not only is it bullshit, i have seen it used as a weapon by so many white women and terfs that even if it were true, i wouldnt care! whoever came up with the term “woobify” (which i have most often seen used in reference to how tony stark is treated) needs to tell bucky stans that they aren’t exempt. a lot of them see bucky being a victim as something that needs a continuation into every other part of his life, hence why he’s so often put into these weird dynamics with his ships and given traits he’s never displayed on screen.

i keep thinking of disclaimers to make in anticipation of people coming to my inbox crying so here’s another: if you are a woman or someone who feels a close connection to certain parts of womanhood, me saying bucky isnt woman coded in no way takes away from you identifying with him or parts of his story. that is personal. a woman’s personal relation to him is not reliant on “woman coding” as i’ve seen a lot of white women and terfs suggest, not does it strengthen the existence of such coding. coding is created within the original media, not within the fandom.

i also just realized ive been using the term woman coded rather than female coded, but i think subconsciously there is a reason for that that ties into one of my main points pretty well: the mcu stan’s definition of “female” coding relies on stereotypes, not about female roles, but about what it means in their opinion to be a woman. the issue with this is they take traits they think only exist in (cishet) women and use them to deem these (cishet) male characters as woman coded when in fact these traits are not exclusive to women and enforce weird standards upon people who are women that might not be cis or het or share these traits!

tony stark being short and bucky having long hair is not what would make them woman coded. bucky being rescued by a man while woozy is not what would make him woman coded. bucky being submissive to pierce when LITERALLY BEING BRAINWASHED is not what would make him woman coded. and perhaps a harsh wake up call: bucky’s story hinging around loss of agency issues and trauma in no way shape or form is what would make him woman coded. does it perhaps make him easier for many women to relate to? yes. but is this something exclusive to women? no. a vast majority of trauma victims are going to relate to him, and chalking up trauma to being something female makes me feel really funny.

i know exactly what thread youre talking about lmfao and its right up there on my shit list next to the childlike bucky post. theyre actually very similar now that i think about it ... but anyways. now that ive listed my woes about what doesnt make a character woman coded, what actually would! AND HERE IS WHERE WE GET INTO AN ACTUAL CASE OF WOMAN CODING! mr prequel series anakin skywalker aka my shakespearean downfall dilf. why is he seen as a valid example of woman coding? i will tell you.

the thing about woman coding is that its meant to subvert heteronormative tropes while remaining self aware of that to exploit and emphasize the change. DO YOU HEAR ME? SELF AWARE! anakin is given many of these stupid stereotypical traits i mentioned before, but they arent reliant on physical appearance at all. they are reliant on roles. padme is the levelheaded senate leader, the one with power and stability, while anakin is hotheaded and frankly a bit whimsical while he struggles for his own type of power and control. another classic example of woman coding (which i actually wrote a paper on last semester in my men and masculinities class) is heathcliff from wuthering heights, whose counterpart to his coding is cathy. both men have that whimsicality in common that contrasts heavily with how we would expect them to act. bucky does not act like them at all.

the reason that this is different from bucky and steve’s ‘damsel in distress’ argument is the self awareness i mentioned before. not to mention the weird heteronormative standards being applied as requirements for their gay relationship to be seen as valid because it “fits the narrative” but .. anyways.

anakin and heathcliff both have their subverted traits played up in a way that shows off how ridiculous the women usually written in their roles are forced to act. its tongue in cheek, because woman coding is not only about individual traits, but about how the character interacts with the story because of this as a whole. bucky is often seen as woman coded because he is put into these situations where he is “rescued” by someone that half his stans see as his love interest (steve my baby im sorry) when hes really only rescued maybe twice? at azzano and from the water when the helicopter crashed. only one of those is a real damsel in distress situation. all of the others are cases where hes fighting his own way out ????? bucky doesnt just sit around waiting for a “real man” to get off his ass as that post suggested but i digress.

anyways. mcu stans lack any self awareness that would be required even if bucky and tony were woman coded. calling them woman coded does not count as self awareness! the real self awareness comes with recognizing that woman coding doesnt actually make these characters women and it doesnt mean they forever belong in these “female” roles. mcu stans take the stereotypes they pick out at face value and use them to say “look! bucky is a bottom!” or to continue taking away his agency by ignoring all of his other actions and traits that dont fit in to this mold theyve made around the idea that he needs a man to save him or boss him around. his story as a whole is the only thing that would make him woman coded and seeing as there is no self awareness of this shown, no attempts to subvert, he displays little to no traditionally feminine traits, and loss of agency on its own is not something that only applies to women ...

in short: in my opinion, bucky is not woman coded. mcu stans just like rolling with stereotypes that rely around cis bodies and straight relationships. the end.

#oh also woman coding does not make a mape character trans lmfaoooooo #thats frankly just insulting #trans men are not men with feminine traits please for the love of god shut up #anyways this is my opinion and you dont have to agree but cis people arent allowed to argue with me

[littlefoxwithbighat]

Hi! This is talking about the plot of the dream smp in a meta sense and its a bit negative. The person behind this blog wants to remind you that you can skip if it's not for you and they still love the SMP. :)

ALL DISCUSSION IS ABOUT CHARACTERS. DON'T ATTACK CCS OR I WILL STEAL YOUR KNEECAPS.

I can't lie; I'm really annoyed and worried at the way the writers are handling Tommys character at the moment, and am increasingly concerned about it messing up the plot.

I wasn't very happy with the finale. I don't think that means all is lost, I think they can pull it back but it's going to take some work. I was worried about the way that things were handled before but the green festival was actually very well handled, so my worries were mostly assuaged. But yesterday? I don't know.

The fact nobody lost a cannon death is kind of disappointing. The weight of blowing up an entire city/ (country?) brutally is somewhat lost if there is no human loss. Nobody was hurt physically and the only people this had a big mental impact on was Tommy and Tubbo, everyone else wasn't very attached to L'manburg or had gone rogue, or were detatched from the while situation. And maybe it's the fact it's happened to them before or that they still have each other or that it seems odd/ frustrating that they still care so much about this place or that it was always a losing battle and they knew it, but I dont find myself really pitying them like I probably should. And I think that comes down to character growth or lack thereof, which I'll discuss later.

Niki and Fundy have started a villain arc, or at least a violent nihilism arc, and I actually don't mind it, in fact I'm a fan but it wasnt really foreshadowed, or really just showing them cracking as much as it should have been. I would guess this has mostly been started for both of them to tie Niki into the plot and I can't blame her for wanting that. Fundys acting is very good, and I REALLY hope the writers handle this well. For Fundy, regarding the fact that his father is going to be resurrected and that Fundy is following in his footsteps... If the writers don't realise that connection and make this a big step in Fundys narrative I will scream. Also Funboo bros are very interesting character foils and I hope their relationship is maintained so that they can play of off each other and also man I just really want them to keep being friends, it's a generally positive healthy relationship that makes both characters sympathetic and we need that right now. As for Niki, her character motivations seem to be mostly centered around Tommy and on the one hand I'm like ehhhh, because Tommy's character already gets a disproportionate amount of attention in terms of narrative, and I get it, but recently he's been a bit TOO much of the protagonist for a multi-person POV improve server... and I'm apprehensive. However on the other hand this has potential for a nice confrontation between Tommy and Niki. If that happens I want Tommy to be aware that this is going to happen and not talk over Niki, and I don't want it to be brushed over. I think it would be best if it was just the two of them. This also gives a nice chance for Tommy to examine his trauma with Dream and explain his motivations and Niki to get her anger out. I also want it to end positively, because it absolutely can and lack of communication when the viewer knows how to fix it is OK as a plot device sometimes but incredibly frustrating if it keeps happening (cough, Tommy and Techno).

Ranboo is reacting to the plot amazingly and I have as usual only praise for him, go, you funky enderman boy, go.

Wilbur is getting resurrected which is a thousand percent because Will wants the plot back and honestly I don't really mind, I think he'll do a good job. However I really hope he speaks to everybody about their characters, particularly Fundy, Ranboo and Niki because I don't want their characterisation and arcs to be thrown away.

Tubbo is doing very well, and I don't have many complaints to be honest. I hope he continues to get in with the acting with no shame, because he's an amazing VA when he wants to be, but sometimes he undercuts serious moments a little too much by laughing. Same criticism for Phil actually. But both are doing good.

On the theme of that, while I don't mind tension relievers or humour in serious moments there are sometimes too many. It was a lot worse about a month back and it was improving, but it seems to be creeping back in and ehhh. It's kind of Marvel-esque and not in a good way? I think it has a lot to do with bloopers and for some reason there are loads at the moment? Like Wilburs arc had almost none and this arc there's at least 2 every moment. Which isn't always their fault but maybe they need to take more steps to prevent them.

Techno is doing OK, he's quite a meta character so I'm not too mad about him undercutting serious moments but sometimes he does do it too much or in the wrong place. Like making jokes about Connor completely over the top of Tommy and Tubbos reunion, you know an event which has been foreshadowed for yoinks, prevented them from getting a proper flow going and kind of ruined it. And that made the reunion really dissapointing, which is a shame because it could have been so cool. However his characterisation is consistent and dedicated, his goals and relationships are clear and he's getting humanised more which is nice, and his monologues are great. I'm curious to see what he does now NL'M is gone but I have total faith in him.

Now Tommy. Oh Tommy. His character is such a mess at the moment, which is a shame because there were moments I saw people doubting his character choices and I was behind him.

Firstly the relationship with Techno fell apart. That was inevitable. Tommy didn't care about anarchy and Techno didn't care about the discs and both of their goals would impede the others. But the way Tommy talks about Techno is so... No? And now I understand that Tommy is going to have a biased perspective on the whole situation, and that's fine and good, but his character is so wrong about Techno it feels weird and painful? Like even from his perspective it went down differently to how he talks about it. They don't listen to each other and it's like watching two people scream at a wall.

The issue is the relationship was fairly well developed. I struggle to see Tommy saying he saw Techno as a friend but Techno never saw him as a friend because hold on, what? Techno, here's a respiration helmet because of that one of thing you told me about your trauma, a disc because those make you happy, plus top tier armour and weaponry, plus I'm going to spend time with you, calm you down from panic attacks, hide you and protect you from Dream, let you wander around L'manburg and achieve your own goals and help you plan things out Techno and Tommy didn't get ANYTHING from that? Plus after Techno opens up about his goals and his trauma, do the one thing that would hurt him the most, (use and then betray him) and then directly oppose his goals after he helped me? Ugh. It just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I know he would never let Tubbo get hurt and thats fine, but there were ways around that. If you're framing this character as the protagonist, then he needs to be sympathetic or at least grow and Tommy using Techno again without remorse and then refusing to listen to his perspective or show any gratitude for anything makes it difficult for viewers to empathise with him in my opinion. Have him betray Techno and then listen to Techno when he explains why Tommys betrayal hurt him and apologise, fine. Have him listen to Techno and try and find a way to keep Tubbo safe regardless, fine. Have him betray Techno but apologetically and still trying to avoid Techo getting crushed or killed, fine. But THIS? Im sympathetic towards Tommys character but this throws away so much potential character development for Tommy, where at least he saw Techno as a person, and not only that but a nice person who despite everything has set aside everything to help him? And then for him to be exactly where he was at the end of season 1, both literally, and emotionally ? I understand this is a child soldier with trauma but this is supposed to be our protagonist and if he doesn't grow, and isn't sympathetic and destroys someone we care about, how can we root for him?

Now all of this could be forgivable, not great, but forgivable, if Tommy had moved on from the discs. The Goddamn Discs™. And the worse part is all the dominoes were lined up to suggest he had! We had his moment of "he watched me" where he realised Dream was the villain and controlling him, "I've become worse than everyone I hated" good, amazing, I see where this is going, "The discs were worth more than you ever were!" and then he retracts and apologises and you think horray! Tommy has realised the discs were being used to control him and if he doesn't care about them, they hold no value! Now he's going to realise that his friends are more important and he's going to stop going after the discs. His new character motivation can be killing Dream and protecting his friends, especially Tubbo. It's clearly angled this way, and this way the plot progresses and Tommy with it. What marvellous character development. Look at him go.

And THEN, after everything that's happened he says the most important thing is the disc and I want them back!?!? EH !!? Why... Who... Who gave the OK on that writing decision? That's so static and boring and unsympathetic! And then he's back to asking people do fight for L'manburg? What?

I'll be honest I was kind go hoping either Tommy or Tubbo would die with L'manburg. I didn't mind it they didn't, there are a thousand ways to make the plot work without them dying, but this was not a great one.

PLEASE let Tommy have some growth. Yes he's had some from not caring about L'manburg to fighting for it in season one, but that was ages ago and he doesnt seem to have changed since then in any way that really counts. And I know this is harsh and he's traumatised but you have to understand I am talking about this in a sense of characters and narrative and NOT in terms of real life. Tommy needs to be better and dynamic because he is a charcacter and I want him to be a good one.

Having said all that, here are my thoughts on the future of the SMP.

Firstly, I am worried that becuse it is such a good source of content, especially for Tommy that they will never ever kill his character and leave him fighting with Dream for eternity. And I love the Dream SMP but I've seen stories that get dragged out for plot or content, and however much you think you want it to never end, let me tell you, yes you do. It will get stale and repetitive and I want the dream smp, or at least Tommys arc to go out with a beautiful and brilliant and fabulous plot ending instead of being dragged into the dirt. And then maybe new characters take the spotlight. Just please god give it a goode ending.

I also really hope they don't throw other things away to make Tommy the centre of attention, especially if it's destructive to the plot, or kind of weird and obnoxious.

Secondly, I am intrigued about the prison and Schlatts book to Dream and Technos favour and the egg and what that entails and I hope they really think through those plot points carefully and make them work, and don't forget them or throw them away.

Thirdly, I am intrigued for Wilburs return and hope that he manages to fix it cohesively without too crazy a change of pace and style and keeping characters (especially Ranboo and Fundy and Niki) consistent.

I hope they prep for the future and think things thought and communicate with each other.

It might be interesting to see other countries finally discussed but I don't know how much that would intefere with other plot points so we'll see.

That's all! Reminder that this is about characters and plot and this is just a few criticisms. I love the dream smp, but there are somethings I wanted to get of my chest. Please be respectful and feel free to discuss in the notes. Also, again, no hate to any CCs!

#mcyt #mcytumblr #dream smp theories #dream smp analysis #dream smp #dream smp spoilers #dream smp meta #tommy mcyt #negativity #negativity tw #dream smp plot