#and my mum was like 'blu's too big!'

[abluehappyface]

Went to a park grand opening and a green dragonfly and a cricket landed on me, and I got to hold a toad >:3

#buy like 10 seconds after picking it up it peed on me -_- #*but #also today just proved that bluey's just a giant child #my sister who is 9 and my cousins beings 9 and 4 wanted me to go on the bouncy castle #but blu being 18 is WAY too tall if not too heavy #and they were like 'noooOOO we want blu to come with us! >:(' #and my mum was like 'blu's too big!' #and my other cousin (their mom) was like 'you know blu's an ADULT right!?' #yeah... #blu's a certified child #not just with my family either #all the kids at the playground know who i am #sometimes toddlers will just randomly hug me when im sitting down #i relate more to kids than others my age #i don't even WANT to interact with the other people around my age in my neighborhood tbh #they all seem mean :/ #so yeah #i guess I'm just a kid lmao #abluehappyface

[sheyshocked]

If They Knew Me, They Wouldn’t Want Me (1/5)

Summary: Demoman works as a stripper and doesn’t want Soldier to know that. So of course he finds out in the worst way possible.

Fandom: Team Fortress 2

Rated: E

Ship: RED Demoman/BLU Soldier

Warnings: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Self-esteem issues

Tags: Strippers & Strip Clubs, Eventual Smut, Eventual Happy Ending, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Self-Esteem Issues, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Friends to Lovers, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

You can also read it on ao3!

Juggling three jobs was rough. Even without him mum constantly pestering him about being “lazy” and a “disgrace to his father, who worked twenty-six jobs just to provide for his family”. God, Tavish knew she meant well, but damn… If only she knew.

Don’t take him wrong. He loved each and every one of his occupations. Was pretty good at them, too. But sometimes, slaving for Mann Co. during the day, helping out at demolition sites at the weekends and holding a night job in the town was wearing him thin. Still, given a choice, he wouldn’t change anything. Being busy (and drunk) was good for him. It kept the bad thoughts at bay.

Not always, of course. He wasn’t that lucky. Every now and then, not even a shitton of booze and less than four hours a day of sleep was enough to keep him from recalling that night at the loch. Or the look of surprise on his best friend’s face right before he chopped his head off over and over again, and for what? Some shiny relic? Bah!

It’s true the WAR was long since over, and he and Jane had made up, once again meeting behind the backs of their enigmatic and cruel employers like nothing had happened, but the sad truth was that it did happen. And they could never take that back, no matter how hard they tried. The confusion, heart-break, betrayal, how much he missed his best mate every waking hour and loathed him at the same time…

But he shouldn’t be thinking about that. Not right now, when he was just about to climb into his car and drive off to his other job.

He felt kinda like a thief, sneaking off into the night. Thank goodness no one ever asked where he was going. Pfft, can you imagine? A guy who was hired to kill a bunch of other eejits for wearing the wrong color, embarrassed about having a side gig. He knew how ridiculous it sounded. Still, he couldn’t help himself. He liked his teammates, some more, some less, and they would never look at him the same again if they knew.

Same goes for Jane. If he were to somehow find out about this… Tavish would have no other choice but to crawl into some deep gravel pit and die. And that wasn’t him just being overly dramatic. Well, maybe a little bit. But he knew Jane. His beautiful, passionate Jane, how deeply he felt about things. The best possible outcome he could hope for would be a punch square in the jaw. The worst? Him stopping hanging out with him altogether. And he couldn’t have that. Not when he just got him back after years of fighting.

He would never let work tear them apart. Not again.

The alley was dark and deserted, like it usually was. Still, he took the time to check his surroundings, to see if he wasn’t being watched. Call it a professional deformation. But there was really no one there, maybe except for a few stray cats.

Calm once again, he knocked on the last door on the left. Once, twice, three times in a rapid sucession. He heard a rustle on the other side, then the door opened and a bouncer, a man almost as huge as their Heavy, ushered him inside. There, at the end of the corridor, he ran into an older guy in a tuxedo, who was just making a phone call. As soon as it ended, his attention turned to the newly arrived Demoman.

“Tavish, my boy! You’re here just in time! People are already lining up to see you perform tonight. You don’t want to disappoint them, do ya?”

“Eh, ye know me, Marcel. I wouldnae want tae keep them waiting.”

Marcel, the owner of the club, gave him a big grin and a friendly pat on the shoulder before sending him off to the backstage. Some of his coworkers were already there, getting ready for the main event. Most never wanted to talk, or even exchange pleasantries. Here, they were competitors, not a team. Still, it would be weird not to say hi to them. So he did, before making beeline to his vanity.

Time to get dressed.

The costumes, shiny and leaving little to imagination, were probably the most ridiculous part of this job. At some point, he even considered quitting because of it. Just looking at what he would have to wear for the night made him feel mighty self-consciouss. But the pay was good and Marcel kept telling him it would be fine, so he caved in.

“Oh, c’mon, big guy, people will love this, you have the perfect legs for it!”

“I don’t know if ye noticed, but I’m no bonnie lass! What sick bastard could possibly enjoy seeing me in knee-high boots and ton of make up?”

“You’d be surprised. Just give it a shot. You’ll see, trust me.”

He did. And people really loved it, for some reason. There were more of them every night. So much so that Marcel started calling him “his golden goose”. Eventually, Tavish became used to it. The only thing he drew the line on was the stupid pirate costume. That one hit way too close to home.

Tonight, the costume was pretty tame in comparison. A white shirt with some tight leather pants and lacy underwear. Simple and easy to remove. Perfect. He put it on in a hurry, leaving the top of the shirt unbuttoned. It always seemed to drive the customers mad.

Soon, the music started playing, a soft, upbeat tone. Everyone stopped doing whatever they were doing and turned to face the stage, where Marcel would announce the first three performers of the night.

“Now, give it up for our gorgeous and talented dancers – Skye, Travis and Blaze!”

A wave of clapping and cheering followed, loud enough it could be heard even behind the heavy curtain that separated them from the crowd. A gentle smile found its way on Tavish’s lips. Blaze was his stage name.

All right. Let’s get this show on the road.

But first, he gave poor Skye and Travis, twins who just started working at the club, a big thumbs up and a mouhed: “Good luck, lads!” Why? Maybe because he remembered just how utterly nerve-wrecking his first shift was. He could certainly use a friendly face back then, and so did they now.

They flashed him a grateful little smile before they disappeared behind the curtain. With head held high and a sultry grin that spelled confidence (which he didn’t feel deep down, but he learned to act like he did – the more cocksure he seemed, the more tips he would get), he followed after them.

Funnily enough, but as much as he dreaded it at the beginning, he came to love the moment when he stepped into the light of the reflectors. It helped that with a bit of practice, he turned out to be a damn good dancer. Nearly as good as he was at making things explode. The way the crowd was cheering him on as he slowly, ever so slowly took off his clothes to the beat of the music… it made him feel desired. Stupid, he knew, but he couldn’t help himself.

Those people down there, when they looked at him, they didn’t see a black Scottish cyclops with a severe drinking issue. They had no idea that the eye patch wasn’t just for the show, that he wasn’t faking the accent or that he was sloshed more often than not. For them, he was just a nice, muscular body to admire.

That was more than he could ever hope for.

As his pants slid to the floor (he never got fully naked on the stage – that was for private shows and lap dances only), he tried not to remind himself of the sheer number of scars he just uncovered for everyone to see.

A monster, an one-eyed monster, his mind kept screaming at him, but he couldn’t hear it over the sound of an applause and his own beating heart.

***

The night went spectacular as always. He certainly couldn’t complain about not having plenty of customers singing him praises and asking for lap dances. Got more than a few generous tips, too. So why did he feel like something was crushing his chest?

By now, he was no stranger to this strange, empty void that enveloped his heart. It usually came after a long night at work. But it would be fine. He just needed to have a drink or two and tomorrow he’s going to town with Jane. That always used to cheer him up a little bit.

#team fortress 2 #boots n bombs #demosolly #demoman/soldier #tf2 #tf2 fanfiction #shey scribbles #multiple chapters #tf2 demoman #tf2 soldier

[blubushie]

...do we get Blu's Dad stories, too? I will also drop my own lore (not that I have too much)!

[Animal Fact Anon]

Uhhhhh off the top of my head

• Was a grenadier in Vietnam. Originally was gonna go to sniper school, but he had a high fever and was hospitalised cuz they thought he might have meningitis. Turns out he didn't, but since he was sick he wasn't able to partake in the finals before being shipped out. Despite that he was the best shooter in his class. Imo he woulda been one of the best snipers of the Vietnam War if he'd been able to take that test.

• He missed being the top gun in the police academy by 2 points because, once again, he had a high fever (this time a malarial relapse).

• Yeah he's had malaria twice. Once he got it in Vietnam, the second time he caught it but it symptomised when he was back in the US. That time he almost died.

• Yay for police academy—SO MANY CAR CHASES. I've inherited his need for speed.

• While in Vietnam, once blew up a tree at about 100yd with his M79. He played it off like he meant to do that, and everyone looked on in awe. He was aiming for the tree, but has stated he could probably not do that again in a million years if he tried.

• Was once bitten on the nose by a horse when he was a kid and now he's afraid of horses. He "couldn't get over how big [the horse's] eyes were" and was staring up at him, and the horse promptly bit hi. This happened again when I was 7 and he brought me to meet the horses on Undoolya Station and I convinced him to feed one a carrot. Instead it leant over, turned its head sideways, and promptly bit him on the nose. He now insists him and horses "don't get along."

• Broke two ribs and almost punctured his lung with one of the pieces by falling out of a boat he was working on. On the OPPOSITE SIDE he broke the same ribs and partially collapsed his lung, and did this while hunting. I have also broken a rib in the same spot on my right side, but this was a hairline fracture and happened during a fight.

• Got a Bronze Star and Purple Heart in Vietnam. He should've gotten a Silver Star instead of the Bronze, but he downplayed his injuries. He'd been shot in the head.

• Got a fishing hook in his thumb when he was about 10 years old. They had to push the hook the rest of the way through his thumb, but he says the local anaesthetic injection hurt the most. When he burnt his finger as an adult almost down to the bone, he insisted they suture the wound without anaesthetic and bore it without complaint.

• Was cutting zipties with a knife like he always told me NOT TO DO and the knife slid. He cut the back of his thumb down to the bone and severed the tendon. I was about 12 years old and was the only rational person in this whole situation except my dad, who was fairly calm despite having exposed bone (my mum, meanwhile, was hysterical). I doctored him while mum drove us to hospital and he still doesn't have full mobility in his thumb.

• Has had skin cancer more times than I have.

• Caught a fucking zebra shark in a local brackish river. A shark hadn't been caught in that river in almost 40 years.

• Stuck his head between two boards as a kid and his ears got stuck. He thought the firies were gonna hafta cut his ears off. "Shit, man! Just like Leave It To Beaver that one time! I was freaking out! All the other kids were telling me they were gonna hafta cut my ears off, saying shit—scared the fuck outta me!"

#blu whos

[bleuu-moon]

murky; biggest fear?

devotion; are you taken?

joy; best feeling you’ve ever experienced? 

valentine; best gift you’ve ever received?

tattoos; do you have/want and tattoos and piercings?

love u blu!!

omfg hiii love u isa 🫶🏼

murky; biggest fear?

straight up, death. wtf i can’t wrap my head around it, it absolutely terrifies me. i think it’s more the thought of the unknown and just not being here anymore than anything though. and being buried alive is up there too ooof 🫠

devotion; are you taken?

nope, single as a stale rotting pringle. i’m keeping it that way too until someone with fully formed adult brain comes along.

so probably never tehe

joy; best feeling you’ve experienced?

deep shit but finding out a certain relative didn’t have the c word anymore, the relief was indescribable 🫶🏼

valentine; best gift you’ve ever received?

on my 18th birthday my mum put together a personalised photo album with lots of pictures and experiences from the day i was born to being 18. there was even little notes from other family members and friends too. i sobbed when i opened it, i’m a big baby when it comes to sentiments like that i lurrrv them

tattoos; do you have/want any tattoos or piercings?

i just have the one tattoo of a special set of numbers on the back of my arm atm. i’m constantly looking at new ones and have about five in line up currently eeeek. piercings, i have four, just two in each lobe but i’m hoping to get my thirds done soon, and also my rook but i’m scared about that one lol

🤍 link

#alwaysshallow <3 #ask game

[hesbuckcompton-baby]

miscellaneous tag game

@xxluckystrike tagged me in one of the questions in this because Blu is LOVELY so now I'm doing it

favorite place in the world you’ve visited?

Iceland! Rome is definitely a close second, but Iceland is just such an unreal place, it almost feels like being on a different planet. Everything there is sooo beautiful, I honestly never wanted to leave, and as a huge Game of Thrones fan getting so see some of the filming locations irl was huge too!

something you’re proud of yourself for?

I've always been pretty socially anxious, so I'm really proud of myself for the friends I've made in this fandom - I was definitely a lot more shy when I first made this blog, so getting to know people has been great! I think getting into my dream uni has been my biggest achievement overall, and it's been worth all the hard work

favorite books?

Anyone who's been following me for a while knows I can go ON about books, so for the sake of brevity here's a short list of my highest-rated books: - Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom, Leigh Bardugo - The Secret History, Donna Tartt - The Poppy War, R. F. Kuang - My Best Friend's Exorcism, Grady Hendrix - Gone Girl, Gillian Flynn

something that makes your heart happy when thinking about it?

One of my best friends lives in an old farmhouse and has a huge field that we all love to have massive bonfires and camp in during the summer, I think those nights are some of my favourite memories, it always makes me smile to think about

favorite thing about your culture?

I really love how much of a mish-mash of culture, tradition and language we have in England. As a big history nerd, I love tracing the origins of things we think of as quintessentially 'British' and being able to see where these things have actually originated from. England's multiculturalism is something I think is incredibly central to this country, and one of the only things I can genuinely say I'm proud of these days

when did you join the hbo war fandom? what was the first show you watched?

I started posting about HBO war on here in May 2021! My first show was Band of Brothers, but I remember starting the Pacific like the day after I finished BoB, so I was pretty all-in straight away

have you read any of easy company’s books? if so, which ones were your favorite?

I haven't, but I definitely want to! I've almost bought Ambrose's book sooo many times but somehow never gotten around to it. My mum's a big HBO war fan too, and it was her that got me into the shows - she preferred the Pacific to BoB, so she had Leckie and Sledge's books, but I haven't gotten around to reading them either

favorite hbo war character and your favorite moment with them?

Ron Speirs you will always be my best friend. I think my favourite moment with him is honestly the bit where he walks in on Janovec having sex and doesn't give a single FUCK because he's just trying to steal as much shit as possible. It's such an insignificant moment but it makes me laugh sooo much every time.

do you make content for any fandoms, if so; what sort of content?

Yes! HBO War, SAS: Rogue Heroes and the A Song of Ice and Fire universe are the only fandoms I've made content for - I'm a fic writer in all three!

favorite actor/actress and your favorite film of theirs?

I worship at the altar of Florence Pugh she is my Jesus and my Princess Diana (definitely not making it weird don't worry). I think my favourite movie of hers is Little Women, mostly because I am so chronically Amy March coded

favorite quote/s that you wish to share with others?

"Thank you for the emotional abuse and the cheeseburgers" - Grover Underwood, Percy Jackson and The Olympians 1x05 (he has such a way with words xx)

random fact your mutuals/followers don’t know about you?

I tear up every time I think about the end of Paddington 2. It's fucking legit

if you’re a writer, do you need a beta reader?

I thrive off of the immediate dopamine release I get after posting chapters the minute I finish them. I live life on the edge and I have no regrets

three things that make you smile?

Shane Madej, stupid camp sci-fi from the 1960s, manipulating people into watching The Terror

any nicknames you like?

I have never been given a nickname sooo idk really

list some people you love to see around on tumblr!

@xxluckystrike @dcyllom @basilone @mercurygray @footprintsinthesxnd @trenchenjoyer @mads-weasley - you guys are all so great, I'm so happy to be in this fandom with you!! <3

what would you do during a zombie apocalypse?

off myself like. immediately. sorry but I've watched all 11 seasons of the walking dead and I'm not doing that shit

favourite movie?

Muppets Christmas Carol you are my number one bestie of all time, in the words of Mr Darcy, i ardently admire and love you

do you like horror movies?

yesssss I'm such a horror girlie I love it. The Conjuring movies are my go-to classic 'haunted house' horror movies but I'm particularly partial to a good bit of folk horror (Midsommar and The VVitch my beloveds)

Everyone mentioned above please consider yourselves tagged and feel free to do this!! If I didn't tag you, do it anyway if you want!! it's fun xx

#tagged

[putschki1969]

Hi Puts, I have a question, but maybe it's too personal. As a fan, how much money do you spend? I think the three FC alone cost about $130 a year. Each shipment to Mexico costs between $20 and $50, including fees. Buying CDs, DVDs, streaming tickets, shop items, magazines (Idk if Hikaru and Keiko send something like Botanical Tsushin) I think is quite a bit of money. I graduated this year and recently started working, so I'm wondering how much money I need to pay for everything I want.

Hello there!

Don't worry, I have no filter so there is literally nothing too personal you could ever ask me. Also, I think it's important to be transparent about stuff like that.

Before I get to the juicy details I want to preface this post by saying that I am in a very privileged position so using my fangirl expenses as a general reference is probably not the best idea. There is free education and public health care in my country so I do not have any debts from either of those. On top of that I do have a job with a decent salary and my monthly fixed costs are comparatively low since I share the rent and stuff with my mum (yup, I am 30+ and choose to live with my mum, sue me). My company pays for public transportation, internet and a big portion of my meals. Last but not least, I have no car, no partner, no kids, no pets, no other social commitments or anything else that would burden me financially aside from my obsession with Kalafina so I am free to spend a considerable amount of my income on my "hobby" without having to worry too much about running into debt or not having enough savings.

Having said that, I will openly admit that I spend a SHIT-TON of money for my girls, much more than I am honestly comfortable with. Yes, I can more or less afford it but it still brings me a lot of pain and tears every single day.

Now let's get into the details 〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→ [Like you I will be using USD for easy understanding]

I honestly cannot tell you a definitive number since my expenses always change depending on how many events and releases are scheduled for a particular time period. I guess I can provide a rough overview of what I am currently spending on Kalafina since there are quite a few things happening right now (nothing compared to last December though).

The four FCs I am part of with their combined costs of roughly $150 are what I consider to be “negligible costs” and they are really my least concern in the grand scheme of things.

The streaming tickets are very cheap in my opinion and I would gladly pay even more for them if it meant I wouldn't have to spend a fortune on regular trips to Japan. But yeah, it's another $150 to $200 a year for various streaming events.

Releases and merch are pricey in and of themselves (incl. around $5-$10 of domestic shipping) but it's made even worse when you are crazy like me and buy multiple copies of something just to get special benefits. Recently I have ordered Hikaru's merch (~$100), Keiko's merch (~$50), Wakana's merch (~$120) and three *coughs* copies of Wakana's Blu-ray (~$220). I also made sure to purchase Hikaru's albums on iTunes (~$20) even though I already own the CDs.

International shipping/import fees is where the costs pile up and I usually end up paying anywhere from $20 up to $150 for packages. Austria has literally the WORST import regulations T_T

I also indulge in the occasional Kalafina fashion item so that gets pretty expensive too. But that’s just me so there is really no need to take these costs into consideration.

So yeah, you can expect to spend a LOT of money depending on how greedy you are. :P Being an overseas Kalafina-fan sucks! However, I have two tips for you:

Prioritising is key! Find out what’s most important to you and then make peace with the fact that you will never be able to buy everything because that’s just not reasonable (unless you are filthy rich :P). I obviously focus on digital and physical music releases because that’s how you support their solo careers. I know it’s tempting to pirate this stuff but I urge all fans to make those purchases. The same applies to live stream tickets. If you have the means and the event is foreigner-friendly, please go for it! Aside from that, you will just have to choose your orders wisely. Ask yourself the questions: What kind of benefits do I prefer? What merch am I most likely to use? Any merch I am particularly fond of? Make sure you don’t end up overspending. While I keep encouraging fans to spend their money, you should always do it within reason. 

Cluster your orders! If you are using a proxy service like Tenso or Buyee, it’s best to have items arrive around the same time so you can consolidate your packages (within the 30-day period). After all, there is nothing more frustrating than paying $20 on shipping for a tiny fan club magazine that’s basically for free. So before you make a purchase, check the scheduled shipping time and try to make your orders align with each other. And also try to pay attention to the shipping dates of FC-related items, that’s not always easy since the schedules aren’t exactly regular but you can at least get a feel for them. If a FC item happens to arrive at the warehouse, you could always use that opportunity to order some in-stock goods or releases you have had your eye on. They should arrive quickly so you can ship them together with the FC-item. Please note that this will of course increase shipping costs/import fees since your packages will get bigger/heavier but I think at the end of the day, you are still saving money.

I know it’s often frustrating and intimidating to navigate through the world of Kalafina but I hope my posts can at least somehow help to alleviate the the stress that comes with being an overseas fan.

#kalafina #reply #wakana #keiko #hikaru #life is hard as kala-fan

[aifastic]

Winning Lines

The @talesofteufort zine has been shipped, and the PDFs sent! Thank you very much to everyone who contributed. I’m very glad to have been able to participate in this project; it was a wonderful experience and it’s been great working with everyone aaaa ♥

I’m really happy to share my piece for the zine! I really hope you all like it ♥ (Read it below the cut)

Title: Winning Lines Words: 1845 Warnings: None Summary: BLU has a drawing contest. Demo just wants his magazine back.

-----

“ARE YOU MANN ENOUGH TO DRAW THIS BETTER THAN US?”

The header caught BLU’s Demoman’s attention. He’d been reading the latest issue of Hat-Wearing Man when he found the ad at the bottom of one of the pages. There was a somewhat simple drawing of a monkey in a spacesuit. “If you draw Poopy Joe better than our extremely talented artist, we’ll give him the boot—and kick his ass in the process! And your picture will be the new image of our project and you, our lucky friend, will win nothing less than $700 dollars!”

“Huh, it doesn’t look that hard…” he said, pensive. Suddenly, the magazine was snatched from his hands. “Hey!”

“Ohohoh, what’s this?” Scout said, grinning at the magazine. “Hey, I’d win this in the blink of an eye!”

“Oi! Get your own!” Demo took the magazine back. “I’m gonna try this. Mum will love the extra money,” he added to himself.

“Pffft, no way, it’s a waste of mail money, pally. If someone should participate, that’s someone who actually has a chance.”

“Heh.”

They turned around to see Sniper in a corner, grinning.

“What’s your deal, Long Legs?”

“Shut up, ya scoundrel. If anyone has a chance here, it’s me.”

“Oh, yeah?” Demo asked. “Where’s your credentials, mate?”

“Don’t need any,” he said. “Quiet kid, hours at the back of the classroom sketching the teacher being eaten by a croc.” He grinned. “It should be easy as cake.”

“Oi, do ya remember the magazine is mine?”

“I agree, though—the chance should be for whoever’s got the talent.”

Demo sighed. “Aye, alright. But I’m not gonna just give it away.” His face lit up, an idea coming to his mind. “You’ll have to beat me for it.”

“Huh?” Both mercenaries stared at him quizzically.

Demo grinned, eye glinting.

“Let’s have a drawing contest.”

-----

They emptied the kitchen table in order to make room for their sheets of paper, pencils and pens. In the meantime, they threw evaluative gazes at each other, competitive strike flaring up.

The rest of the team slowly wandered to the room to find out what was going on.

“What is noise?” asked Heavy, scratching his chest. Medic, who was right behind him, had just closed it, having found himself too distracted by the ruckus to continue his surgery.

“We’re about to find out who’s gonna win 700 dollars!”

Medic perked up. “I am in. What is the bet?”

“We’re not betting, mate.” Sniper showed him the magazine’s ad. “It’s a contest.”

Medic’s smile turned dangerous. “Even better.”

“Heavy is in, too.”

“Aw, come on, guys! It’s not as if you’re gonna beat me!”

Heavy threw Scout an unimpressed look. “It is fun. I want extra money. I am in.”

“Alright, alright, mate. Sure.” Demo handed them both some extra sheets of paper they'd brought just in case.

Medic excused himself to go search for a couple of pens. On his way out, he almost crashed onto Soldier.

“Ach, watch where you’re going!”

“I need sustenance, maggot! And you’re on my way!” He shoved Medic away, making him stumble on the way out. A couple of German swears could be heard from the corridor. “Hello, everyone!”

“Oh, don’t tell me you’re gonna get in too,” Scout groaned.

“In what?” Soldier inquired, tilting his head. Demo showed him the magazine’s ad.

Engineer peeked over his shoulder.

“Oh, a drawing contest?” he said, looking at it with a fond smile. “Heh. It’s been a while since I tried my hand at one o’ those. But I thought they allowed only one entry per ad?”

“That is point,” Heavy said. “We are fighting to get chance to earn money.”

“Oh…” Soldier grinned. “I’m in, maggots! I actually studied art with Kickasso.”

Everyone stared at him.

“Sure, mate,” Demo said, patting his back and attempting to lead him into the kitchen.

“You don’t believe me!” Soldier looked at everyone. Engie shrugged. Scout picked at his nails, and Sniper scratched the table distractedly. Heavy’s eyes said it all. “I will prove it to all of you!” And he headed to the table, snatching a paper sheet from the pile.

Demo brushed a hand across his own face. “I hope Medic brings enough pens.”

“I’ll go for mine,” Engie said. He added, “And I’ll go look for Pyro; they’ll love this.”

Scout groaned. “Anyone else? Maybe Saxton Hale?”

Spy’s laughter can be heard from a corner of the room.

“Oh, this is priceless. I wasn’t going to butt in, but this looks like too much fun to pass on the opportunity.”

“The opportunity to what?” Scout said, miffed.

“You’ll see,” he said with a glint in his eyes. “Besides, you need a referee, don’t you?”

“Ugh,” Scout said, bonking his head on the table.

-----

Everyone looked at each other from their respective places. Scout’s leg bounced nonstop; Sniper picked unconsciously at his pencil. Heavy’s grip on his pen was strong enough for Medic to worry about it breaking.

“Alright,” said Spy. “You have to draw…” He squinted. “Poopy Joe, following the ad’s instructions; the best artist wins. The rules are: no interfering with anyone’s drawing. No kicking under the table. No destroying anyone’s drawing. No rising up from the table until all this is over. No showing your drawing until everyone is finished. Understood?”

Everyone nodded. Pyro hummed happily.

“Excellent. So, on the count of three: One, two… Three!”

Scout’s pen tore onto the paper. “Shit! Do you have a spare?” Spy handed him one. “Thanks,” he muttered.

The truth was, Scout wasn’t that confident of the fact he was going to win. When it was just him and Demo, he’d been sure he’d win to the unsteady hand of a drunk man. And Sniper was all bragging anyways. But Medic? He’d probably drawn lots of skeletons and stuff at college. And Engineer’s schematics always look exactly like the finished product. Shit. And—did Soldier really paint with Kickasso? Nah, he shook his head. He didn’t think so. Heavy was a wild card, though.

But he had to try anyway! He couldn’t back off now. So he put his all into it.

Engineer turned his sheet of paper down. Hell! That was fast. He tried to concentrate in the lines that formed Poopy Joe, and emulated them the best he could. Damn, his hand was sweaty… He hated drawing. His cousin had always been better at it, and it pissed him off even now, far from home.

He slapped his drawing on the table, face down. “Done!” He looked up to see everyone had finished. Crap.

“Alright, then,” said Spy. “Let’s see what you came up with.”

“Come up with?” That had many meanings, but the way Spy said it… “What do you mean?”

“The challenge was to improve on the design of Poopy Joe drawn by the artist, not to copy it.”

“Oh, darn,” Engineer said, showing a perfect copy of the Poopy Joe logo. Holy shit. “Guess I got a bit carried away. I’m more used to copying stuff, ya know.”

Soldier snickered.

“Let’s see what you did, Soldier boy.”

“Alright! Look at it and weep!”

He showed them all a mess of lines with dots in seemingly random places.

“Soldier, that’s…” Scout got elbowed by Demo. “That’s cool. What are… those?”

“Those are his eyes!” Oh, God.

“Let’s see Demo’s!” grinned Soldier, confidently.

“Ach, you know I’m no artist, mate,” he said, showing his drawing. It was… Actually, it was pretty decent. His drawing had a cartoonish style that drew everyone’s eyes in.

“Interesting,” said Spy, nodding approvingly.

“Demo did great job,” Heavy said, crossing his arms.

“Aw, thanks, mate.” Demo shrugged it off, somewhat flustered. “What about yours?”

Heavy showed his drawing. It was simple, a single line delineating the silhouette of the monkey astronaut. It was stylish, though it was difficult to guess what it was at times.

“Wonderful, mein freund!” Medic clapped, and revealed his. It was… Oh, my god. “I might have put a bit too much emphasis on his organs.”

“Next!” yelled Scout, tearing his eyes away from the gory drawing. Shit. Now he had to show his. Alright. You can do this, he told himself.

He turned the page face up.

“Mate,” Sniper said.

“Oh, buddy, we made the same mistake.”

“Y’know? I saw RED’s Scout draw once and I secretly thought we were doomed.”

“Oh, shut up!” Scout said, face beet red. It was true, he’d tried to copy the drawing, like Engineer did. And his lines weren’t as sure as Demo’s or Heavy’s. Shit. He screwed up big time.

“It’s good overall, mate,” Sniper said. “You just need more confidence.”

Scout flushed. “What about yours, Mister Expert?”

Sniper grunted, and showed his drawing. Oh, wow. It was really good! The monkey looked like it’d come out of the page and tear them apart. He felt as if he would be able to touch its fur.

“Wow, Slim! That’s one helluva good drawing!”

“Thanks,” he said, grinning. “I told ya: quiet kid.”

“Where is his spacesuit, though?”

His face dropped. “Aw, hell.”

“Hmmmph!” Pyro yelled, pointing at their sheet of paper.

“Alright,” Spy said, grinning along with Engineer. “The moment of truth has come.”

“What do you mean—?”

Holy shit.

The drawing was astounding. The monkey looked cartoonish enough not to look real, but in a way that made the drawing look alive. Everything was there, and in wonderful detail: The space-suit, the stars… Even an additional full moon in the background that was a perfect circle.

“Holy shit, Py!” Scout said. “How did you do that?”

“Hhmph?” Pyro asked, pointing at the moon. Everyone nodded. Pyro mumbled happily, grabbing another sheet of paper, and drew a classical Greek style face, then erased the rest of its features little by little until they got a perfect circle.

Oh, for the love of—

“Well, it seems we have our winner,” said Spy, handing Pyro the magazine. Pyro clapped with glee, running off with it.

“Aw, man. That was totally unfair. You knew this would happen!” Scout pointed to Spy accusingly.

“I had my suspicions,” he said, grinning.

“Hey, maggots,” Soldier said, sniffing. “Is that smoke?”

They all turned around to watch Pyro as they set the magazine on fire.

“Ach! My magazine!” Demo ran and stomped on it. However, many of the pages, including the drawing contest ad, didn’t make it. “Hell. Why, mate?”

“Hmmphmmphmmph!” they said, pointing at everyone in the room, then at their drawings. Then they clapped.

Everyone looked at each other, and found a common understanding. Who knew what Pyro said? But they had the feeling they meant they were all winners today.

“So it was a huge waste of everyone’s time. Fantastic,” Spy said. “Entertaining, though.”

“Shut up, Spy, we were having a moment,” Scout said.

And yes, indeed. Because even though Demo lost his magazine, he left the room with a good feeling inside. And he was sure that the rest felt the same way.

Poopy Joe’s artist could keep his job for another day.

#Team Fortress 2 #fanfiction #BLU Team #Tales of Teufort #Tales of Teufort zine #[♥]

[artificialqueens]

Everything And More, 1/3 (Blu/Cheryl) - Juno

Summary: Blu and Cheryl discover they are soulmates … at the worst time possible. Does distance really make the heart grow fonder?

(A/N: This is a prequel to another fic I wrote which is on AO3, but can be read on its own too. Just wanted to do something with some DRUK girls, and there will be more to come! No CWs for this chapter. Hope you enjoy this so far.)

“Surprise, surprise!”

Cheryl had only had to open the door to the oddly quiet living room to instantly jump out of her skin the sight and sound of all her friends, the synchronised bangs of party poppers, streams of colours through the air. Something shattered in the kitchen through the open door at the back of the living room (most likely the walking hazard that was Kendall knocking a mug over), but shrieks and cheers covered up most of the noise.

She instantly turned backwards to meet Vivienne’s smug smile, as she stood behind her, and hit her with the paper KFC bag that was in her left hand.

“I knew you were doing this!” Cheryl cried, although really she would never have guessed.

“Give over, Chez, you had no idea. You thought we were just going for nuggets. Anyway, d’you like it?” Viv’s grin was a little forced.

“I love it! Babe, thank you so much!” Cheryl tugged Vivienne down the six inch difference in height to hug her round the neck.

A gentle ahem from inside the front room interrupted them, and Cheryl turned to Divina, standing waiting her turn.

“Divina did the decorations,” Viv muttered, but she needn’t have said; it was obvious by their precise locations and mix of pastels (but no other bright colours) that it was Divina’s hand leading all of this set up. Cheryl just dragged Divina towards them both, happy they’d put their mutual dislike aside even if it just for this.

“You didn’t think we’d let you go off to America without one last party, did you?” Divina exclaimed.

“Guys! You really shouldn’t have! Oh, I’m gonna cry!” Cheryl finally put down the KFC bag, nuggets spilling on the floor, to wipe her eyes.

Divina seized her by the cheeks. “Less of that, Cheryl, no tears today, okay? Come in and we’ll get the party going.” Divina steered Cheryl into the living room out of Vivienne’s arms, and Baga grinned as she handed her a mug.

But Cheryl knew better than to drink it right off the bat.

“What’s this, Bags?”

“Just coke,” Baga shrugged.

“Coke and what?”

“Coke and a mug.”

“Coke and what, Baga?”

But Baga just grinned. “Drink it and find out!”

Cheryl put the mug to her lips and … Oh, yes, coke and some fucking paint thinner, she realised. This was going to be an interesting afternoon. Just Baga feeding them all more and more alcohol from her mum’s special cupboard and topping it all up with water or apple juice or whatever hair-brained scheme Baga seemed to have thought up next.

Speaking of her mum …

“Viv,” Cheryl realised, turning to her, “does my mum know you’re all here?”

Vivienne blinked and looked at the painting on the wall.

“Viv! Tell me!”

“What are we playing first, girls?” Baga ignored Cheryl, steering her to the dining table which was large enough for six, and littered with bottles and cans. “Make space! Cards? Anyone brought cards?”

“Baga, no way, I told you I’m not playing Ring Of Fire again.” Kat folded her arms, glaring at her.

“Shut up, Kat. Who wants Ring Of Fire?”

“I’ve got a deck of cards!” Vivienne declared, producing one from her bra.

“No way am I playing with those.” This time it was Divina’s turn to put her foot down. “Not when they’ve spent all morning in Vivienne’s tits. I might catch something.”

“Only thing you’ll catch is some class, girl.” Vivienne replied smoothly.

“Class? From you? I don’t think.”

“Okay, okay!” Baga huffed. “Jesus Christ, you lot. Someone else suggest something then. Chez, get that down your neck.”

Cheryl focused on drinking while the others argued about the game. Viv and Divina kept shooting barbs at each other, with Vinegar egging them on and Sum waving her hands in the air trying to calm both of them down. Baga’s face grew redder and redder as she fought not to shout at them, while Crystal, Kat and Kendall went to the back door to vape.

Wait.

“Is Blu not coming?” Cheryl asked in the kitchen, but the argument was reaching a crescendo. She drained the mug and went outside to the back garden. Crystal was blowing smoke rings, while Kat and Kendall sat in the grass, legs intertwined, passing Kendall’s vape pen between them and picking at the daisies.  

“Where’s Blu?” Cheryl asked Crystal, thinking Kat and Kendall were too preoccupied for company.

“She’s still got flu,” Crystal replied, blowing a cloud of smoke through the centre of her newest smoke ring. “She couldn’t come.”

——

Fuck this. Fuck the flu.

Blu felt like shit, and not just because of the flu. She was missing Cheryl’s surprise party. God, what irony. She hadn’t missed a day of term over the whole of sixth form, and now she had the worst flu of her life at the end of the summer holidays, right before everyone was going to uni and right before Cheryl was flying to America.

She looked down at her phone from earlier when she’d messaged Viv.

Blu: sorry im still sick

Blu: mam wont let me out the house

Blu: best i can hope for is to be better for monday to come to the airport

Viv: Can’t be helped girl xx

Viv: Hope your feelin better soon xx

She’d wanted to see Cheryl’s face when Viv brought her in for the surprise, because Cheryl would never guess in a million years and her face would be a picture.

She’d wanted to savour every minute she was still with her best friend before he had to get on the plane and go on that scholarship.

She’d wanted to give Cheryl her present at the party. Nothing worth a lot of money, or big, but something that meant a lot to Blu and she hoped to Cheryl too.

Sighing, she looked over at the corner where it was wrapped, ready to go. Where she’d almost fallen on it this morning, getting up and out of bed. Telling her ma she felt fine, before her unsteady legs gave out under her and she crashed into the wall.

It sucks being in bed all day.

She looked down at her watch - one of those new ones with the soulmate-finder on it, to see that the day was moving frustratingly slowly. There was nothing onTV, she’d watched what felt like the whole of Netflix, and she still didn’t really want to eat.

With a growl of frustration, she tugged the duvet over her head and snuggled down, hoping that being good and staying in bed would help her fever hurry the fuck up and leave her in time for Monday.

Then I can say bye.

She couldn’t let Cheryl go without saying goodbye. Cheryl was far more than her best friend.

Coming over from Belfast after her parents’ divorce two years ago felt like wrenching a tree from its roots and trying to plant it in rocks. London was too big, and even now Blu still wasn’t altogether used to central London, but here on the outskirts wasn’t as bad.

In addition to a different country, she’d had to shift her studies here too, and her first day at her new school had felt like all the wires in her brain had been rearranged. Besides, having the badge of honour of being the New Girl among these sixth formers who had already known each other for five years was never going to be straightforward.

But her first lesson, on her first day, Business Studies, had seen the prefect Cheryl toss her hair back from her shoulders and pat the empty space at the desk next to her, her smile charming and so fucking genuine.

It had been all Blu had needed for something hot to blossom in her chest.

She’d been so confused. Back at school in Belfast, she’d convinced herself having crushes on her girl friends was just a phase, as her ma had said, and she would grow out of it. But meeting Cheryl had made her sure that it definitely wasn’t just a phase. The crushes she’d had in Belfast came and went, like clouds on a windy day; like the boys who had entered her life but who had never felt real, and had let her go like the wisp of smoke she turned into. But Blu had never once moved on from Cheryl. Cheryl was the sky beyond the clouds. In her mind now, that was all there was.

Blu had shook when she’d told her ma she was certain now, over Christmas holidays in Year 12 - certain that she didlike girls, this wasn’t going away, and there was This Girl in her life now, and This Girl was incredible, kind, talented, gorgeous … and probably as straight as a poker. And her ma had nodded along with her confession, reassured her, let her cry at the relief.

Cheryl remained This Girl.

Incredible, kind, talented, gorgeous, and Blu was convinced poker-straight.

Blu opened her eyes, stunned to see the clock had moved on to seven pm in what felt like no time at all. She’d slept, by some miracle.

Her throat felt much better, too.

——

Three rounds of Ring Of Fire and countless attempts at Among Us later, and Cheryl was warm and drunk and swaying happily to the music from Divina’s Spotify playlist. Among Us had gone to pieces after everyone had collectively decided that Crystal was just always going to be the imposter and Crystal made no attempt to dissuade them; simply flipping her hair back and winking at them.

Cheryl felt the familiar sensation of Vivienne’s fingers at the back of her neck, tugging her hair back to braid. It transported Cheryl to being in Year 7 again, when Cheryl had had her super-long hair, and Viv had been obsessed with braiding it at every opportunity. Now, with long gentle fingers at the base of her scalp, Cheryl let herself ascend to cloud nine of relaxation.

“You having a good time?” Viv asked softly.

It was a tone she didn’t really use with the rest of the group; her own quiet way of caring. Cheryl tried to nod.

“Stop it, girl, your braid is coming out!”

“Sorry. Viv? Mum did know about this party, didn’t she, babe?”

Vivienne cackled in response to Cheryl’s tentative question. “Of course she did, like Divina would have decorated your house like that if your mum hadn’t known about us giving you a party.”

Divina spun round at her name, her red hair seeming to flare up. “Vivienne, if you don’t stop -“

But Divina was interrupted by a sharp nudge in the ribs from Crystal, and a pointed glance to Sum, who Cheryl only just noticed was lying on the ground, her hands in her rucksack. She sat back up with an impish grin.

“Do you want to play some pass the parcel?” Sum asked, her eyelids drooping as she handed a parcel wrapped in brown paper to Cheryl. Her words were slurred; Sum was the lightweight of the group, for sure. Still, Cheryl was drunk enough not to think that pass the parcel was a stupid idea.

“Let’s do it then!” Cheryl shouted above the music. “Everyone get on the floor!”

“Some of us don’t need to go far, do we?”

“Shut up, Kendall, I’m not that short!”

“Just shut up and sit down, Baga,” Cheryl pulled her down to sit with them all. “Right - who’s got the music on?”

“Me,” Divina said, holding her phone up. “I’ll do the stops.”

The parcel took forever to go round everyone, with them all having a turn to unwrap a layer. After the seventh layer was unwrapped, Vivienne realised that Divina was not stopping the music when she had the parcel, resulting in yet another argument. But once everyone had had a turn, as expected, the parcel landed on Cheryl as the music stopped.

It was a small box, big enough to fit in her hands as she cupped it. It had to be the last layer before the gift was revealed. Obviously, Cheryl thought to herself, they’ve planned all of this.

She tore the paper off, and was stunned.

“This is - guys -“

Cheryl had seen the adverts for the soulmate-finding smart watches, but holding it in her hands … it felt surreal.

“We wanted to get you something meaningful,” Sum was smiling warmly as she spoke, “and so we all got together and bought you this watch.”

Sure, Cheryl would have loved to have owned one of these watches before, but they were so expensive and so new, that she thought it would probably be years before she’d own one at least. And now, here was the small box that held one, of her very own.

“God - you must have spent a fucking fortune on me, you didn’t have to do that …”

Cheryl found tears come readily to her eyes as Baga gave her a hug.

“Chez, it’s fine. Maybe now you’ll find an American soulmate!”

“Maybe.”

“And then you can stay in America and not come back!”

Cheryl forced a smile as she patted Baga on the back, letting the tears fall now.

“We’ll need to set you up before you go so when you get there you can meet some American as soon as you land. There’s some, like, personality quiz or something they make you take so they can set you up with a soulmate. Give me your phone and I’ll set you up.” Divina reached for Cheryl’s phone.

“Hey, hey, what makes you think you’re going to be setting her up, Divina?” Viv protested. “We all bought it, so we allget to do it.”

“Why can’t you fucking -“

“Shut the fuck up! Both of you!” Crystal shouted above them both; the only one still seemingly sober. “God, you’re both being fucking childish.”

“We’re all doing it,” Vinegar announced, and her authoritative tone as always caused the rest of the group to go quiet; Divina as docile as a lamb as she handed over Cheryl’s phone and the watch.

The nine of them poured the rest of the spirits and the mixers into each other’s mugs and glasses, and gathered round Vinegar as she downloaded the app onto Cheryl’s phone and started filling in the questions on the personality test.

They’d been a group for seven years, and although they didn’t always all get along now, it was the closest Cheryl felt to anyone. Cheryl glanced round at her friends, close as sisters but loyal as family, feeling tears hot in her eyes once again. The slight unnerving feeling in her gut that she had every now and then threatened to throw her off course again, intrusive thoughts creeping back in.

Is this the right thing?

Divina and Viv weren’t staring daggers at each other for the first time in the last month; instead working in tandem and chuckling softly at each other. Vinegar, her tongue worrying her lip in concentration, tapped answers to the questions as the girls called them. Kendall motioned to Kat with her vape, and the two backed away to the door of the kitchen, Sum following them.

A Levels had been and gone, and school was officially done. Cheryl’s scholarship to the prestigious Iman Performing Arts college in New York City was secured, plus the resettlement grant which would pay for moving costs.

She was the only one leaving England behind.

Blu would get it. Blu knows what it’s like to move countries. But Blu has the flu.

She giggled to herself at the rhyming thought, the only thing she could do to keep from crying again. Baga was already eyeing her to make sure she didn’t. The last thing she wanted was for her makeup to smear any more than it already was.

But it felt so much like her bubble of school, of normal life, was ending; ready for this new world of academia and New York to begin. It was a dream come true and a nightmare rolled into one. But Blu would understand, because she’d already moved to another country.

She wished for Blu more than ever at that moment.

Before she could think about it too much, her phone was thrust back into her hand by Vinegar, the questions all completed.

“There you are, babes.” Vinegar pointed to the bottom of the page. “If you like what we’ve done, just hit go.”

Cheryl didn’t feel as if all the words were going in, as she looked down the page, reading descriptions of herself, answers to family questions, life, hobbies, hopes and dreams. She could see the words, but they didn’t register; and as she read them, they felt as if they were describing someone else, someone who maybe existed in a mirror rather than a physical form.

When she got all to way to the top, she blinked at the ‘looking for’ box. Vinegar had entered Men, but Cheryl hesitated. That wasn’t … quite right.

This is it, Chez. Now or never.

Vodka was great for a confidence boost. She tapped the button where Vinegar had added that she was looking for Men, and changed it to Any gender instead.

A detail that wasn’t missed by Vinegar’s inquisitive gaze.

“Wait, hold on, hold on. Chez? Chez!”

Vivienne turned to look, and so did Divina and Baga.

“Oh, finally!” Baga exclaimed, dragging Cheryl back into a hug. “We wondered if you’d admit it before you left.”

“What? How did you know?” Cheryl cried.

But none of them would tell her; just smirking at one another and alternating her with hugs.

——

Cheryl’s flight wasn’t set to leave until five, but she had to be there three hours early to get through customs - how did that make sense, Blu thought, when she could arrive forty minutes before and still get back to Belfast - and so Blu had wanted to be there early, but there were so many people on the Tube, plus a breakdown at St Pancras, meaning she had barely any time to sprint across the glistening tiles at Heathrow airport.

Where is she?

The departures board said her flight was already going through baggage check in and security. There wasn’t much time. She followed the signs to the bag drop …

“Blu!”

Crystal was coming towards her, and Blu saw behind her Divina, Viv and Baga; all presumably having come down in Divina’s cramped little third-hand Ford KA. Viv was rubbing her eyes, and the telltale mascara lines on her cheeks told no lies.

“That’s it, then,” Crystal nodded, looking gravely at Blu. “She’s putting her bags through and then - well, she’s gone until Christmas.”

“You can still catch her after she comes out of baggage check in, Blu,” Divina said gently.

Blu didn’t pause to second guess; she sprinted past them, towards the baggage drop, watching people queue with their cases, looking at the queues for any sign of her.

And there she was.

Cheryl in the flesh, coming out of the baggage drop and about to ship herself almost halfway around the world; her normally perfect blonde hair tied off her face; her normally flawless makeup not even slightly present. Just Chez in a baggy shirt, denim jacket, and a pair of leggings, ready to fly. Ready to leave this bubble behind.

Blu had never loved her more.

Before she had the chance to call her, their eyes met. Blu watched them expand, the elated grin flood her face, and her arms open as Blu ran into them. Cheryl caught her, squeezed tightly …

Time stopped.

How was she meant to let Cheryl go? They’d only known each other these last two years …

They hadn’t had the time as besties the rest of them had had, but Blu knew that Cheryl just felt like a part of her now; as if each of them were a jigsaw with one piece of each other that fit perfectly.

It’s not the end. It’s not the end.

But as much as Blu repeated that to herself, something churned in her stomach at the thought of Cheryl leaving.

When time finally flooded back into their day, as Cheryl pulled away; Blu watched her green eyes fill with tears and Cheryl hurriedly wipe them away.

“Sorry,” Cheryl muttered, “I knew I was gonna cry at some point.”

“It’s alright,” Blu whispered, her own voice breaking too much to speak louder.

Cheryl nodded, taking Blu’s hand and squeezing, gazing at the ground, giving Blu as reassuring a smile as she could muster when she was evidently breaking in two.

“I’ll be back at Christmas,” Cheryl was murmuring, meeting Blu’s eyes again, “and in summer. That’s not long. Christmas is only, what, four months away. And we’ve got Skype. Facetime. Whatever. We’ve got - we’ve got everything. We’ll stay in touch. We will. We all will. We …”

“I know.” Blu nodded back at her. “We’ll talk - every day if you want, Cheryl.”

Cheryl nodded again, hitching her rucksack higher on her back.

“I have to go through security.”

“Before you go -“ Blu had almost forgotten. Her own present. She tugged it from her bag, small as it was, wrapped in brightly-coloured paper. Cheryl would probably guess at what it was from the size and shape, but she still rattled it next to her ear for good measure, before laughing and taking off her rucksack to put it in.

“I’ll open it on the plane.”

“Alright,” Blu replied, but Cheryl was frozen, her eyes wide, pleading. Asking something that Blu couldn’t hear, couldn’t understand.

“You don’t want to miss your plane, do you?” Blu whispered.

“No.” Cheryl took a deep breath. “Thank you, Blu.” And with a shy smile, she leaned in and ever so gently gave Blu a kiss on the cheek.

It was the last thing Blu expected. She held her breath, wishing time would stop again, wishing she could hold on to this moment, or drag Cheryl back off the plane. But they’d had so much time. Over school, over summer, and nowwasn’t the right moment.

“Bye, Blu. Thanks for the present. See you at Christmas.”

Blu feigned nonchalance. “If we let you back in the country.”

Finally, Cheryl managed a laugh. Squeezing Blu’s hand for the last time, Cheryl pulled away, finally letting her go.

Blu let her, and watched her walk away to the escalator up to Security, the first steps to her new life in America.

It was only when Blu reached up to wipe the tears from her eyes that she saw the blue notification light on her new watch. She hadn’t figured out what all the notification lights meant yet, so frowning, she tapped the button on the screen.

‘A soulmate is within a 10m radius. Please press the blue button to start your timer. You have one day for your soulmate to respond. You then have 100 hours to connect. Alternatively, please press the red button to decline this opportunity.’

Blu felt her legs tremble.

No fucking way.

She was frozen to the spot, reading the message over and over.

Turning her head back up, she watched Cheryl reach the top of the escalator. About to head to Departures.

Now was the only chance she would have before she lost her.

But Blu couldn’t move.

Finally, her legs seemed to obey her as she tore to the escalator, taking the steps three at a time, and at the top - sighing with relief - Cheryl was still there, putting her liquid items into the tiny plastic bags, draining her bottle of water to the last drop.

“Cheryl!”

Cheryl spun at the shrill sound of her name, a split second before Blu launched herself at her. She opened her arms and caught her a second time that day.

“Blu? What’s wrong? What -“

“We got you a soulmate watch, didn’t we?” Blu could barely catch her breath, her heart hammering. “Are you wearing it right now?”

“Yeah, it’s here,” Cheryl nodded, and held up her wrist. Something caught her eye, and frowning, she looked at it. “Why is there a light on it?”

Blu didn’t reply; she simply held up her own watch, with the same notification light.

“You’ve got a soulmate watch too? Wait, why is yours like that as well?” Cheryl said, but Blu didn’t need to respond. Cheryl’s mouth fell open, and she turned her eyes from the watch to Blu; who watched her realisation and her every thought as it crossed her face.

Cheryl - isn’t straight either?

“You -“ Cheryl’s eyes filled with the same easy tears that she always seemed to produce; always the easiest cryer of the group of them, always the most emotional. “I can’t believe it. You did, too?”

Blu nodded, weak with relief. “Since the start of sixth form.”

Cheryl gasped. “Since we got paired up for business studies! God, two years! Two years we’ve wasted, not doing this!”

Before she could ask what she meant, Cheryl tugged Blu towards her, closing the distance, kissing her lips; and it was everything and more that Blu had dreamed it would be. Cheryl might not have been wearing makeup, but she still smelled divine, her warmth a solace, a right place to be. Blu wrapped her arms around Cheryl’s waist, hoping to go deeper, but Cheryl let her go suddenly.

Blu saw her eyes cloud over once again.

“How am I meant to get on the plane if we’re -“

But she couldn’t finish the sentence, words failing Cheryl for probably the first time in her life. Blu looked at the Departures gates, ignoring everyone else around them, and took a deep breath, swallowing hard.

“For your dream, Cheryl,” Blu whispered. “This is what you’ve wanted forever. You’ve always said that. Remember - remember that day you got the scholarship through? When we were in class?”

“God, we got so drunk that day,” Cheryl giggled.

“Yeah, well, you need to go for your dream.”

“But - “ Cheryl swallowed, her voice an octave higher than usual. “But we’re soulmates, Blu.”

Her words wrapped themselves tightly around Blu’s heart, and she thought she’d never in her life forget the ice-cold sorrow in Cheryl’s voice … but she couldn’t let that influence anything rash.

She sniffed, trying to hold her tears back. “You have to go, Cheryl. You’ll miss your flight. I’ll be here for you, when you get off it again, at Christmas. I promise.” Blu rubbed her arm. “I’ll be right here, at Heathrow. Go get your dream, girl.”

“God, we’re stupid,” Cheryl muttered, “for not realising sooner.”

Blu pressed Accept on her watch, and a new message came up.

‘Thank you for selecting. Your soulmate has one day to respond. You will be notified when they make their decision.’

“Tap yours.”

Cheryl giggled. “Why? It’s definitely me.” But she did so anyway.

Blu felt her watch vibrate again, presumably with another message, but she didn’t care; Cheryl was here, and the watch had somehow made everything they’d both hidden for two years come into the light, fall into place like the missing jigsaw pieces.

“What - what now?”

But Cheryl didn’t reply; she grinned through her tears as she pulled Blu back towards her for a last kiss; one that felt like sustainment, like life itself. Blu could do nothing now but enjoy this moment, the final one for now.

Cheryl finally let her go, and Blu had to tell her to go before she changed her mind.

“Get your flight! Go and get your dream!”

Cheryl looked at the security desks, then wistfully at Blu.

“I’ll be back at Christmas, alright, babe?”

“I’ll be here for when you land. I promise.”

Blu let her go.

#rpdr fanfiction #rpdr uk #uk1 #blu x cheryl #cheryl hole #blu hydrangea #divina de campo #the vivienne #baga chipz #fluff #college au #university au #soulmate au #lesbian au #juno

[johnnymundano]

The House That Dripped Blood (1971)

Directed by Peter Duffell

Screenplay by Robert Bloch

Music by Michael Dress

Country: United Kingdom

Running time: 102 minutes

CAST

"Framework"

John Bennett as Detective Inspector Holloway

John Bryans as A.J. Stoker

John Malcolm as Sergeant Martin

"Method For Murder"

Denholm Elliott as Charles Hillyer

Joanna Dunham as Alice Hillyer

Tom Adams as Richard/Dominic

Robert Lang as Dr. Andrews

"Waxworks"

Peter Cushing as Philip Grayson

Joss Ackland as Neville Rogers

Wolfe Morris as Waxworks Proprietor

"Sweets to the Sweet"

Christopher Lee as John Reid

Nyree Dawn Porter as Ann Norton

Chloe Franks as Jane Reid

Hugh Manning as Mark

Carleton Hobbs as Dr. Bailey

"The Cloak"

Jon Pertwee as Paul Henderson

Ingrid Pitt as Carla Lynde

Geoffrey Bayldon as Theo von Hartmann

Jonathan Lynn as Mr. Petrich

NB: I watched this via the 2019 Second Sight UK Blu-Ray release and the picture is really fantastic (technical term there). So, if you were wondering, now you know; this is the copy to own.

The House That Dripped Blood is a British 1970s anthology horror movie from Amicus, and I make no bones about the fact that I am totally partial to that jam, pal. I grew up watching these movies, from a ridiculously unsuitable age, on Friday and Saturday nights with my mum while dad was down the pub. Their ridiculous delights are fused into my brain by the flame of nostalgia, more thoroughly even than those of ‘70s Jonah Hex comics. (And ‘70s Jonah Hex comics are pretty fused in there too. Tony DeZuniga; he da boy!). You came to the wrong place for impartiality, basically. The House That Dripped Blood is horrortastic.

Putting the lie to the spectacularly enticing title there is no actual blood in The House That Dripped Blood, but there is definitely a house. And it’s around this house that the four fear inducing stories revolve. But every proper portmanteau demands a framing device and so the movie starts with the arrival of uppity Inspector Holloway (John Bennett) who has been dispatched by Scotland Yard to investigate the disappearance of horror movie star Paul Henderson (Jon Pertwee) from The House That Dripped Blood. Obviously the house is never referred to as “The House That Dripped Blood” as that would put prospective tenants off; bit of a real estate tip there for you.

Unlike most police investigations, Bennett’s takes the form of people telling him far-fetched stories about the previous occupants as though this might give him a clue as to Henderson’s fate. It’s an interesting approach to policework. Luckily, Bennett, a copper singularly lacking in ratiocination, at no point even begins to wonder how exactly the people telling him the stories know what happened, since most of the people who could have told them end up dead or insane. The answer would be that these are a bunch of punchy shorts scripted by pulp wonder Robert Bloch and the house is just a big old McGuffin to hang them off. And learning that might be a bit too meta for a common movie plod to handle.

First up is Method for Murder wherein debonair horror author Charles Hillyer (Denholm Elliot) rents the house to get some peace in which to write another of his (apparently terrible) potboilers. Unnervingly Hillyer’s new opus concerning Dominic, a strangler with a bowl haircut and British Teeth©™®, starts to bleed into his reality, and the possibility that he may be losing his mind may not be the worst option on offer. Denholm Elliot (1922 – 1992) was never a star, but he was a fantastic actor all round; his particular forte was a kind of nervy self-assurance constantly on the cusp of crumbling into wild-eyed desperation. The kind of thing it takes a lengthy, poorly constructed sentence to describe in English but in German is probably encompassed by a single word that sounds like someone cheerfully stamping on chicken bones. Elliot’s very good at it, whatever it is, and he gets plenty of chance to demonstrate it here, as Bloch’s plotting turns the screws until he pops. Everyone else is very good, particularly Robert Lang as Dr. Andrews, who is the perfect oily 1970s personification of a psychiatrist. And it would be remiss of me to omit to mention Denholm Elliot’s superb salmon pink shirt. Personally, I find fashion is one of the finest characters in British ‘70s horror movies, and in The House That Dripped Blood fashion is on fine form.

As is soon apparent in Waxworks when Philip Grayson (the always marvellous Peter Cushing) sports a spellbindingly classy cravat and jacket affair. His gobstopper red smoking jacket is also quite special, but it’s the cravat ensemble which carries him through most of the episode and takes the trophy. This eerie creepster is about a retired financier who rents the house to brood while listening to records and looking at a photo of a woman from his past. When he isn’t posing by the weir in a melancholy way Philip walks into town where there are actual shops (this is before the Internet and 10 years of Tory government had reduced the English high street to charity shops, boarded up windows and Gregg’s The Bakers) and finds the world’s most morbid waxworks. Haunted by the display of Salome (who is supposed to look like the lady from his past; you have to take this on trust since the waxwork isn’t exactly life-like) Philip is visited by his old chum Neville (the ever forthright Joss Ackland), who has a penchant for neck scarves that resemble an acid trip made silk. Both men have the woman in common but prefer to elliptically skirt around the troublesome issue and pretend it doesn’t matter anymore; Bloch knows nobody does emotional cowardice quite like the English. Soon Neville meets Salome too and the blokes race each other to the horrific finish. Joss Ackland is great, obviously, but it’s worth noting that, as ever, Cushing puts in a performance far more moving and tragic than the material deserves, and so makes it sting all the more. Fans of ‘70s unconscious misogyny might risk getting all turgid since Waxworks is all about a woman who ruins men’s lives but doesn’t actually feature a real woman. Ultimately though such people will have to go home empty handed as it’s clearly the men doing it to themselves and blaming it on a woman, which is a pretty clever bait and switch by Bloch.

Bloch’s quietly understated intelligence is even better demonstrated by Sweets to the Sweet which looks like it’s about witchcraft but is actually about the damage a lack of love can do to a child. Widower John Reid (Christopher Lee) moves into the house so he can commute to the city and do his business in whatnot and whathaveyou and have his child Jane (Chloe Franks) home-schooled in a controlled environment. Reid is all about control and Christopher Lee is ideally suited to the role, bringing all his not inconsiderable clipped prissiness to bear without totally eliminating Reid’s humanity. Reid loves Jane but he also fears her. But why? (why does he fear her, not why does he love her; c’mon, people, work with me here). It’s a conundrum Jane’s newly appointed teacher Ann Norton (Nyree Dawn Porter) unwisely seeks to solve. Plenty in this one to chew on viz a viz kids, parental responsibility and the need to keep a close eye on candles and razor shavings. Probably enough for a dissertation in fact, but, putting the chalk and elbow patches to one side, it is mostly about witchcraft because that’s spooky fun; no one wants to watch an unvarnished 20 minute segment on the emotional abuse of a child in a horror movie. That’s what Home Alone (1990) is for.

Seeking to send the audience out into the ‘70s night to catch the last bus on a bit of a high, the final terror tale, The Cloak, spoofs about in an enjoyably goofy fashion. Prima-donna horror star Paul Henderson (Jon Pertwee) moves into the house to be near the filming of his new (apparently terrible; probably based on a script by Charles Hillyer) movie. Being a great believer in authenticity and disappointed by the cloak provided by the doddering wardrobe mistress,  Henderson sources a suitably eerie item of attire from Theo von Hartmann (Geoffrey Bayldon), a ridiculously freaky tat shop owner with a suspiciously Teutonic moniker. When wearing the cloak   Henderson’s portrayal of a vampire becomes a little bit too authentic for comfort and he learns a steep lesson in the Hollywood food chain from his comically pneumatic co-star Carla Lynde (Ingrid Pitt). It’s slight stuff but pretty funny with everyone camping it up like a cub scout sleep out will be arriving imminently (camping; tents; scouts; c’mon, folks). I vaguely recall reading that Pertwee claimed the whole movie was supposed to be in this mirthful mode, and that he based his character on co-star Christopher Lee, but didn’t tell Lee (obviously). If I ever get the time to wade through the multitude of extras on the Blu-ray maybe I’ll find confirmation. As it is, watching the movie was pleasure enough for now. But like I said I’m practically marinated in this stuff. Nevertheless I persist in the belief that people who haven’t been knocking about for half a century would still find something to enjoy in The House That Dripped Blood; even if it’s just that cracking picture quality.

#The House That Dripped Blood #Movies #Horror #Anthology #Amicus #Peter Cushing #Christopher Lee #Denholm Elliot #Nyree Dawn Porter #Robert Bloch #Peter Duffell #1971 #The 1970s #United Kingdom #Ingrid Pitt

[amplesalty]

Christmas 2019: Day 8 - The Grinch (2018)

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Eight cans of Who Hash!

In and of itself, I feel this is a fine remake even if it cutesafies The Grinch a little bit. He complains in the original that he’s been putting up with Christmas for some 50 years and both he and Max look every bit of those 50 years but here he’s much more youthful here. It’s a very appealing design, very detailed with the fur but I am a bit confused as his attire. He’s seemingly naked but wears underpants to cover his shame, only to then wear furry trousers over that? He’s a very dirty, brownish green in the original but is much more vibrant here.

The original can seem like a bit of an acid trip at times with all the Suess babble and strange contraptions the Whos use and this pays homage to that during The Grinch’s Christmas heist as he pulls out all manner of interesting toys to help with his plot.

The Grinch himself doesn’t feel as one dimensional and there are times when he is quite hesitant to go through with what he’s doing or his eyes will widen with surprise upon hearing a point of view he never considered before, almost to a fault I’d say as it does dilute the big reversal in his character at the end.

Kind of like how that remake of The Lion King ruined ‘Be Prepared’, they turn “You’re a Mean One, Mr Grinch” into this sort of rap/hip-hop song which feels out of place. One positive musical number is this version of ‘God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen’ by way of West Side Story as this group of carolers suddenly mass and chase after The Grinch with perfectly synchronised movement and finger snaps.

I want to look at something more specific here though. I’ve mentioned it before but a lot of these Christmas movies I look at tend to be more recent releases and for once this is one I actually saw in the cinema last year. It was inevitable that I would cover it having looked at the original and the Jim Carrey version but I proffered to hold off on talking about it because I like to use the stillframes to highlight something amusing or to emphasise a point. It could almost be a fresh watch though as I really didn’t remember much about it going into it again.

Outside of the Minion short that ran before it that is, which had two Minions breaking out of prison. I dread to think what those Minions did to end up there. I think that’s included as an extra on the DVD/Blu-ray which I don’t have here which is a shame as I remember kind of liking it, mostly down to its lack of speech. I do appreciate being able to portray story and humour without using any dialogue, goes back to that whole Mr Bean kinda thing. It made for a positive entry into that franchise for me as I think it’s something people are generally a bit sour of, probably down to how annoying they can be and the watch they’ve been latched onto, especially those weird memes you get from people’s mums on Facebook.

There is some element of that here as there is some humour to be had from the reactions of the non-speaking characters around The Grinch like Max or the reindeer he takes in as part of his scheme and renames Fred. It’s nice to have those subtle moments where just an awkward glance can be funny, in amongst all the exaggerated behaviour of the Grinch and the loudness of things like a random screaming goat. Actually, that goat is pretty funny as well.

The original you obviously have stuff like the KARLOFF narration, the wicked smile The Grinch has upon thinking of his plan and him slithering through the house while enacting it. The Jim Carrey one, my big takeaway was the look of it. I’m really surprised to learn that that particular version actually got an Academy Award for Best Makeup, as well as nominations for Best Art Direction and Costume Design. The original was pretty unique with its strange colours and imagery but I just remember the remake being deepy ugly with close up, wide angled lenses and those intensely creepy looking Whos.

If anything deserves nominations for visuals, it’s this version. Very striking, bright and colourful in and around Whoville when all its Christmas lights are lit.

But you also have these great shots at times that reflect the action on screen, be it the expansive action orientated shots of the down with Cindy Lou dashing through on her makeshift sled or the more moody look at The Grinch overlooking the town from up high on Mount Crumpit.

Or this vast cave structure in which he lives but only occupies but some tiny fraction of. Like here, he and his dog sit at this grand dinner table with a relatively posh light fitting overhead and a fancy multi headed candle holder decorating the table. It adds to this sense of preteniousness and superioty he has. But, at the same time, the two feel a million miles away from one another and they both seem like small figures in this enormous room. It’s almost a reminder of how he is a small part of this great big world.

Which is another thing I like here, how it touches upon how neurotic The Grinch is. It’s something the Jim Carrey version did too with his being bullied as a child but here he’s just entirely shunned from a very early age and is extremely isolated now.

At the very start you’re dealing with his agoraphobia and his reluctance to venture down to Whoville to resupply, as well a startling reflection on all the comfort eating he’s been doing that have left his cupboards bare in the first place.The look on his face here is truly haunting.

Just being in Whoville amongst all the Christmas lights and revelers pretty much sends him into a panic attack.

Even though he does feel so cut off from everyone, there is a sense that he fails to recognise his importance to other people, shutting out one of the Whos who tries to be friendly with him and not really appreciating Max. It’s a bit of a weird dynamic, with Max seemingly at The Grinch’s beck and call, fetching him his breakfast each morning but it does seem like he’d do anything for him and even gets a bit jealous when Fred comes into the picture. Hell, Fred even comes back at the end to save the day so obviously someone cares. And what a fine head of hair he has too.

But even when you think you’ve had a Hollywood ending where The Grinch has been redeemed, and learnt that Christmas perhaps means a little bit more, he still has to deal with his social anxieties. When he’s invited round for Christmas dinner, he hesistates on the doorstep, clutching his head in his hands as he tries to talk himself out of going by proclaiming that everyone will hate him.

On reflection, despite all the colours, lights and beautiful vistas, almost like Gremlins this movie really is stark reminder of the bleaker side of Christmas and the internal battle people sometimes face with their loneliness and depression. Really not something I was expecting to find in an innocent little kids film. People like to talk about how The Joker isn’t just another comic book movie but is actually a deep look at mental illness, maybe The Grinch beat it to it a year earlier by wrapping up this sombre look at the psyche in a neat Christmas bow?

#Christmas 2019 #The Grinch #Grinch #How The Grinch Stole Christmas!

[bleuu-moon]

blu my darling, if you wanted too, you can choose three or so asks from the ask game that you would like to answer and answer them and i’ll eat up whatever you choose <33

hello my beloved sorry for the delay,,,,no pressure then :)))))) but i choseeeee…

3. 3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

i answered this one concerningly quick but but but, dirty dancing, pulp fiction and spiderman 2

6. what’s the best and worst part of being online/a creator?

the best isssss, i love how you can meet people that you never would on the outside world, i feel like you can learn a lot from them too

the worst is personally, the comparing!!!!!!! i effortlessly compare myself to others, it’s one of my flaws and i hateeeee it. i will sit there for hours writing something, then go and read someone else’s work and because mine doesn’t have as many big words or dialogue or as big of word count, i don’t think mine is worthy of posting shakhdowjsk. i’m working on it though hehe. i also hate how the internet isn’t free from dickheads who think they’re cool giving people shit online from their mums box room :/ like get a HOBBY

13. what are you doing right now?

having a coffee and watching GMB (good morning britain) looool <3

#captainfern <3 #ask games

[missile-silo]

More headconons because I feel like it

* They adopted a cat and called it Schrödinger . He’s a Maine coon cat (they think, he was found in a box). He’s an old cat, about 10.

* They also have a little Russian blue (again they’re not sure, he was found near an airfield)cat called Yuri (after Yuri Gagarin) but they only got him a year before the show started. He’s only a year and a half old.

* Alya comes to Marinettes apartment one time and is complaining about getting a low score on her science test. Mendeliev is marking papers while banging her head on the table saying “they’re so f**king stupid” and Alya starts screaming.

* Marinette learns how to bake through Gina, so she still makes things for class gatherings.

* When she was first taken in Marinette ate a lot of pizza. Like a lot. She can’t stand it now.

* The morning routine consists of: coffee, breakfast (cereal, they go through so much), get dressed and leg it because Mendeliev forgot she had a meeting.

* Marinette finds out about Mendeliev and Bustier by walking into the apartment to see both of them chatting (flirting) in the couch. School was bare awkward.

* The above has also happened to Alya, Nino and Adrien, but Nino saw them kissing so he’s scarred.

* Mendeliev smoked. Marinette poured water on her when she did. Mendeliev no longer smokes (she has an juul instead)

* “Ms I haven’t done my homework, what should I do?” 

 “Perish”

* Marinette purposefully tells Mendeliev about trends in the hope that she’ll pull some weird crap in class. So far, she’s heard three screams from Mendeliev saying “oh wig?” to people not finishing work.

* An incredibly distraught Mendeliev asking Damocles for help to learn how to raise a kid (I feel like she’d be 27 when she got Marinette, so she would have been teaching for 6 years). Damocles doesn’t know Marinette is Mendelievs kid, but knows she has one.

* Jagged Stone being involved with Marinette in more of an uncle/godfather way after finding out about her being adopted. Offers to look after her during holidays and after school when there’s parent evening. Not over the top, but he has definitely been called into school (during school hours)when Gina couldn’t make it.

* The bro relationship Adrien and Mari have. They act like siblings because they can relate about parents being gone and the trouble with that. They get put into groups for science classes with another random person (they good at science minus biology) and the bickering would be real.

* Nino and Adrien are also like bros, but they’re like best friend bros.

* Alya and Marinette have a healthier and more positive relationship, with Marinette being blunt about relationships. Marinette helps Alya with physics and chemistry homework in return for biology homework. The dynamic duo have lots of fun together, and neither end up third wheeling because the group ends up getting pretty close.

* Alya still falls for Lilas lies at the start , but Marinette talks her into publishing the video in a sort of speculation/public opinions based column. This would save the reputations the ladyblog when all comes to show.

* When Lila comes into the class, she lies about knowing ladybug first and Maris like oh dope. Then she says about the miraculous and Maris like “ookay bit weird” but nothing comes out of the volpina episode that damages Marinette (Adrien voices concern about her not taking being rejected well, but Marinettes like “you should be able to reject who you want bro”). Mari mainly doesn’t like her because of the lies and her ignoring Adriens attempts to get away from physical contact.

* Then comes the bull crap about the bakery girl being her best friend and Maris like “lmao what no mate” and Lila puts on crocodile tears. People react with hostility, but Alya runs her mouth and says that Mari is the bakery girl. She later gets thanked for this, but admits she wasn’t thinking straight.

* Some people are hostile to Marinette after that, with Lilas tinnitus. At break time Marinette admits she didn’t manage to get any work done. This is where Marinettes head injury rears it’s head, because she has difficulty with focusing in class because of it (I do my research this is a real thing I think). She asks why Lila didn’t move to the front row replacing Nino or Adrien (or even Chloe and Sabrina). There’s a bit of owopsie and Adrien moves himself to the back (leaving Lila with marinette, much to Lilas dismay)

* Lila tried to claim that Marinette wanted to keep her away from Adrien, to which she’s like “yeah, you don’t respect his boundaries despite his clear dislike for you touching him”. There’s a whole woe is me part, but then Alya and Nino step in like “tf dudette, thought you weren’t interested”. Then Lila cries to her mum and...

* They are “revealed” when Lilas mum demands to see Marinettes mother (to talk about how horrible she is and why she shouldn’t “bully” her kid) and despite the school offering multiple times to call Gina she refuses saying “I’m lilas mum, I should talk to Marinettes mum” and Mendeliev just sort of says “oh yeah let me get her” and she spins around and is like“hi you wanted to see me?”

* There’s a big oh feck.jpg moment in the class, but it explains a lot about Mari (why she despised Lila for using her parents death for fame, why she was so big about Adrien being able to choose if people touch him or not. Ms Mendeliev raised her that way)

* People are surprised that she doesn’t get favouritism from Mendeliev, but they both explain that they hate that (miss bustier is making notes)

*Sabine and Tom were once Ladybug and Chat Noir (for like a week) and Gina sees ladybug and chat acting like bros and is just like :,) cod they act like Sabine and Tom but less romantic and more familial.

* Marinette and Kagami just... end up together. Only Nino knows why. It does involve a can of squirt cream, a kitchen knife, three packs of blu tac and a whoopee cushion.

* The group happily integrating other people (Aurore, Mirelle and Marc) because the power of a found family is just THAT strong.

* Weredad doesn’t happen (obviously. Unless I wanted to douse this with ridiculous amounts of angst in which I would have Toms ladybug ghost being akumatised because he missed so much in his babies life)

* Marinette isn’t obsessed with Adrien, so she just has obscure sci-fi references on her walls like from “The cone heads”

* Mendeliev used to have a mild heart attack whenever she saw Marinette trip or fall down the stairs, but now it’s like “oh ya....there she goes”.

* One of the office women (receptionist?) taught Mendeliev little tips and tricks about raising the gal. Ended up being one of those people you call auntie but really isn’t related to you. (Her name’s Linda and she knows everyone’s name)

* Marinette found some heelies in a charity shop when she was about 6, and just sort of clings to Mendelievs jacket when she walks because that woman is fecking tall.Whenever she outgrows them, someone from her extended family gets her a pair. This carried on for years. Almost gave Chloe an aneurism when she first saw them do it on a school trip.

* The group all does it now. Sometimes Alix tags along, but grips onto Kim instead.

* Someone (Rose) asks Marinette whether she has an adoptive Dad and she’s like “no but I might get another Mum if she ever learns how to flirt” and Ms Mendeliev is embarrassed but Bustier is deciding if she’d want a daughter

* Post “reveal” Lila runs to the media and now the class has a daily game of finding out who are Marinettes illegitimate parents that week

* “Who am I related to this week?”

“You’re Jagged stones and... Adriens’ Mums kid now.”

“Damn, I always thought I’d be Jagged’s and Audrey bourgeois’ kid”

* Someone gets akumatised because they think they were a bad parent.

* It’s probably Astruc.

* One of Marinettes favourite childhood toys is a furby but Mendeliev is terrified of them so if Mari gets annoyed at her she just whips out the furby

* Marinette tried to be all cool about her Ma but she does say the occasional cursed thing like “She sleeps in her lab coat. What you don’t know that scientists shed their coat once a year? Wack”

* The phone conversations that consist of other cursed things:

“No you can’t eat cheesecake. Why?! It literally has cheese in the title. YOU’RE ALLERGIC TO MILK! Why did you do that? Yes I’ll tell school to get a supply in, just try not to puke on your phone. Please don’t do this every time you have a meeting you don’t want to go to. ”

* Marinette has a lot of extended family past her own, but doesn’t get to see them often cos Mendelievs family all live in Eastern Europe.

* Max gets Marinette to help with Markov (working out how to get him to hover idk I haven’t seen the episode)

* Buffinette is real. But not from fighting or weights. It’s from dragging Mendelievs’ student’s books up four flights of stairs to get to the apartment.

*Theres no balcony scenes because having a balcony increases rent and Paris is already expensive.

* Marinette has heterochromia (an eye for each parent) because I’ve been playing overwatch and I like Moira’s design. She’s definitely more obviously half Chinese, and her hair is more a warm black (incorporating Toms hair a bit). What, this is my Au I’ll design Marinette how I want to.

* Although realistically Marinette should have green eyes after Tom because that’s how google says alleles work but idk. God maybe powerful but I’m a tired Brit who’s results day is far too close.

* Ladybugs outfit is more than just spandex. It’s modelled after Chinese martial arts and roman gladiators (the armour).

* Marinette tends to struggle to empathise with people but is compassionate. If someone cries infront of her she’ll comfort them but won’t really get why until it’s explained.

#teachers dicount au #miraculous au #miraculous ladybug #ms mendeleiev

[itwasanangryinch]

JCM Projects -- 2019

My aim is to update this at least monthly, ideally weekly with all of the projects John Cameron Mitchell will be working on, debuting, or a part of in the upcoming year. If you know of a project not listed here, please message me thru inbox or IM.  | |  Updated June 19th

This Week (June 19th-23rd)

(DJing) Mattachine – Monthly queer dance party with Amber Martin and Ang DiCarlo at the Julius

The Origin of Love Tour (North American) (ongoing)

New York – June 27th, at The Town Hall (3 left!) New York – June 28th, at The Town Hall – sold out! New York – June 29th, at The Town Hall – sold out! New York – July  27th, two shows! at Fischer Theatre/Bard College (16 left!) Michigan – November 2nd,  at the University of Michigan, (tix on sale in Aug.) Austin – February 7th, 2020, at University of Texas at Austin/Bass Concert Hall (tix on sale in August) San Fransciso – February 29th, 2020, at Berkley University. (tix on sale in Aug.) Salt Lake City – April 3rd, 2020, at Kingsbury Hall (tix on sale in July)  Los Angeles – April 11th, 2020, at UCLA/The Theatre at Ace Hotel (tix on sale in July)

more dates to come!

MERCHANDISE: Junction City Mercantile (launched! all proceeds go to helping John’s mum)

Other Concerts

New York – June 22nd, John will be singing a selection of songs from Anthem as part of the first Topic Talks: Music concert. Tickets on sale now.

TV Shows

Shrill (series regular) – Hulu, first season available now! – RENEWED!!

The Good Fight (guest star) – CBS All Access Trailer  | | Sneak Peak | | Episode 

Movies

Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001) – June 25th. Critereon Collection DVD/Blu-Ray release featuring a new 4K restoration of the film, a new chat with the original creatives behind the film, a talk between Stephen Trask and Rolling Stone writer David Fricke, and all of the features from the original DVD release. Critereon.com | | bbfc certification | | watch now

How to Talk to Girls at Parties (2017) – May 8th. Transmission Films. After almost a full year since JCM was there and told that there were no immediate plans for distribution, Australia is finally getting HtTtGaP on DVD and digital.

Podcasts

Anthem: Homunculus: A ten episode podcast series written by JCM and HtTtGaP collaborator Bryan Weller and featuring performers such as Glenn Close, Patti LuPone, Madeline Brewer, and Nakhane. All episodes available. Luminary Podcasts. Little Known Facts with Ilana Levine: Upcoming. John was interviewed on April 29th, episode presumably airs soon. iTunes | | Podbean | | Stitcher The Orbiting Human Circus (of the Air): New episodes dropping generally 2019. A fictional series set in the world of a radio show that broadcasts from the top of the Eiffel Tower. Season one, season one remaster featuring interviews with Julian Koster and JCM, and The Second Imaginary Symphony (does not feature JCM) available now. WNYC Studios.

Too Hot For Radio: 2019. John recorded a live reading of a short story for the NPR program. If it follows past airings, it will be included sometime when the new season starts streaming later this year.

Dreamboy: an ethereal monster movie told in podcast form. JCM guest starred in the finale, aired March 25th, and sang a song. NightValePresents Website.

More John podcasts  

Albums

Anthem: Homunculus (Soundtrack) – Out now. Full soundtrack currently available as a digital download from Ghostlight Records. Featuring John, Glenn Close, Patti LuPone, Nakhane, and others, written by JCM and Bryan Weller. Ghostlight Records 

T-Rex Tribute Album – John will be singing ‘Diamond Meadows’ as part of producer Hal Willner’s project. No release date yet. Variety, JCM ig

Interviews

For interviews that are not really part of a podcast or other thing.

Big Think: May 18th. Video. (Different from the 9th) [ YT, BT ]

Psychology Today: May 15th. Text interview with John about one of the key plot points in Anthem. More talking about the show than actual interview. There is a more spoilery interview linked off of it relating to ep 7, though the spoiler is something that’s been hinted at in past interviews. [ PT,  C ]

Big Think: May 9th. Video [ YT ]

BuzzFeed AM to DM: Daily webshow. May 2nd. [ Periscope, Twitter, BFN ]

New York Live TV/The Hub Boston: TV interview. Same interview ran on both programs. About 5 minutes. May 1st [ YT ]

Time Out Mexico: Text interview. Translated into Spanish. April 29th [ TO ]

Backstage.com: John answered questions from the people at Backstage and fan questions left on their forum and social media. April 25th. [ FB ]

Broadway.com Live at Five: John was interviewed to talk about Anthem: Homunculus and Hedwig. April 24th. [ YouTube, text write up ]

Other Projects

Come Back Once More So I Can Say Goodbye –  a theatre piece by Labyrinth Dance Theatre. About gay life in NYC 1965-1995. JCM is part of Julius' Honorary Host Committee for the show. $40 gen. admission. $25 student/senior/artist. June 14-17th.

Broadway: The Next Generation – documentary. No release date yet.

Time Warp: The Greatest Cult Films of All Time – documentary. No release date yet.

TV Series 1: John has talked about this in interviews. Something that he would be writting/showrunning as well as creating. (impending)

TV Series 2: Something that John would be creating, but not as involved in the day-to-day workings of. Has talked about in interviews. (impending)

Other Appearances

Mattachine, June 20th – a monthly queer dance party at Julius’ Bar in New York. Usually the 3rd Thursday of the month, but does vary. John usually shows up, but does not go to all Mattachines. @mattachineparty​ UPDATED!

Filmmaker on the Edge, June 15th – John is going to be honoured with the award, have a conversation with resident artist John Waters, and screen Hedwig. (press release)

                                                     ARCHIVED

After a certain amount of time, older information will drop here so that fans looking for recent, current, and upcoming projects will have an easier time. Things that have already been done will drop down here. And going into 2020, there will be a new list.

The Origin of Love Tour

February 8th -- Washington DC, National Theatre February 22nd -- Chicago, IL, Atheneum Theatre March 2nd -- Boston, MA, Schubert Theatre May 22nd -- Mexico City, MX, Auditorio BlackBerry June 8th -- Miami, FL, The Arsht Center/Knight Hall

Other Concerts

Drop down after performance unless there’s a stream or a downloadable thing for them.

TV Shows

Shows drop down here after three months for guest appearances and six months after the last episode airs for series regular status.

Movies

Movies drop down six months after last release.

Podcasts

Podcasts that John is in the regular cast for will drop here six months after the last episode. guest starring, three months. Interview, one month.

Regular Cast

Guest Starring

Interview

Adulting: an interview format podcast where JCM and another guest star were interviewed. Broadcast live April 12th as part of a celebration for the venue. Watch video on FB | | Periscope | | Youtube

Death, Sex Money: John is guest hosting and interviewing his friend Marilyn Maye while the regular host is on maternity leave. April 17th. WYNC Studios.

Katya and Craig/Whimsically Volatile: April 25th. Podcast hosted by drag star Katya Zamolodchikova and director Craig MacNeil. This week, Craig hosted the show and interviewed John without Katya. Soundcloud | | Libsyn | | iTunes | YouTube

Selected Shorts: April 25th. John reads Fox 8 by George Saunders. Recorded November 9th of last year. NPR | | Stitcher | | SoundCloud | | player.fm

Chapo Trap House: April 29th. Podcast where John talks about Anthem, Hedwig, Shortbus, “the end of sex.” Soundcloud

Stagecraft: April 30. Podcast about acting.  iTunes | | Player.fm | | Libsyn CBS This Morning: April 30. Talks about Anthem, how being openly out in the time of AIDS informed his work, and the benefits and detriments of working in a digital age. iTunes | | Google Play | | Spotify | | Stitcher | | SoundCloud

Laura Heywood Interviews: May 8. player.fm | | Libsyn   

The Frame: May 9. John has a segment talking about Anthem. iTunes | | player.fm | | NPR

Studio 360: May 14th. John and Bryan talking about Anthem and performing a live version of ‘The End of Love.’ Slate | | iTunes

Albums

If John is guest appearing on the album, it will move after four months. If it’s his project, it will move after six.

Interviews

Drops down after one month for text interviews. Three for video.

Rolling Stone Mexico and GQ Mexico: John is interviewed in both for his performance in Mexico City 

Mural: May 18th. Text interview in Spanish. [ M ]

Escandala: May 15th. Text interview with John. In Spanish [ E ] Open Revista: May 14th Text interview with John in Spanish. [ OR ]

TheatreMania: May 12. Text interview with John and Bryan Weller about Anthem. [ TM ]

Metro Source: May 10th. Text interview with John about Anthem. [ MS ]

Time Out: May 9th. Press release/info for Orbital DJing Event [ TO ]

Daily Beast: May 6th. Text interview. [ DB ]

Rolling Stone: Text interview with John and Glenn Close about Anthem. May 5th [ RS ]

Backstage.com: write up of the FB/IG live video that John did the previous week. May 1st [ Backstage ]

Forbes: Text interview about Anthem and transforming it from the Hedwig sequel. John also talks about his writing process, The Orbiting Human Circus, and which Broadway shows he’s excited by this season. April 26th [ Forbes ]

NewNowNext: Text interview. April 23rd. [ NNN ]

Observer: Text interview. April 23rd. [ Observer ]

Queerty: Text interview. April 20th. [ Queerty ]

New York Times: Text interview. April 19th. [ NYT ]

Other Projects

Unless John is featured heavily, these will drop down after a month or two. These projects might also be less available than some of the other programs.

Other Appearances

Too Hot For Radio – January 26th, as part of San Francisco SketchFest, John went out and read a story for NPR’s Selected Shorts radio program. Eventually it will air via streaming like iTunes, NPR’s website, SoundCloud....

JCM interviews Claywoman – March 17th, John participated in a performance art interview of a drag character reported to be the oldest being in the universe who has travelled to our planet from her own.

JCM screens Entertaining Mr. Sloane – March 19th, John screened one of his favourite movies, a British sex comedy called Entertaining Mr. Sloane as part of a Quad Cinema series.

Various Promotion – various times in January thru March, John was on location being interviewed to promote Shrill. These appearances include the Hulu winter TCAs, the New York Shrill premiere, and San Francisco SketchFest.

Jay Brannon, Joe’s Pub – April 9th, John announced attending concert. Presumably did not perform.

Club Cumming – April 15th, John made his first appearance at Club Cumming as part of a star studded benefit for New Alternatives, an LGBT Youth charity. Sold out!

SirusFM//Signal Boost Show – April 25th, interview about Anthem, Hedwig, Uber rides, and sex.

Tribeca Celebrates Pride – May 4th, John was interviewed his Shrill costar Patti Hardison about how his queer identity has affected his work.

Chocolate Babies screening – May 7th. John announced on ig that he was going to be attending a screening of Stephen Winter’s film.

Orbital – May 24th. John and Amber DJed at the Ortibal dance party in Mexico.

Tony Awards - June 9th. Guest.

Nahkane, The Illustrious Blacks - June 20th. John announced on ig he would be attended Nahkane’s performance before June’s Mattachine Party.

#john cameron mitchell #hedwig and the angry inch #hedwig #shrill #the good fight #anthem #hatai #mattachine #anthem homunculus #dreamboy #the origin of love #club cumming #orbiting human circus #the orbiting human circus #orbiting human circus (of the air) #wnyc #jcm

[hymn2000]

Father’s Day Pride - MCU AU mini-fic

Part of my Frostiron and Spiderson AU. 

Father’s Day is coming up, and Peter is stuck on what to get Tony and Loki. 

Warnings/themes: family, family stuff, father’s day, LGBT+ themes, over-protective Tony, (Loki is mentioned but isn’t actually in this)

Word count: 4101

You can also find me on AO3

-

Peter was exhausted. He’d been trawling around for hours, looking in shop after shop, venturing into parts of town he’d never been before, feeling lost and tired. Father’s day was coming up, and he was stuck. His friends hadn’t been much help at all. They all came from nuclear families, and their suggestions were; ‘anything with Number One Dad written on it’, and ‘just get them something they like’. Malaki had been especially unhelpful, because he said he never got his father anything for father’s day, and he said Peter shouldn’t bother, because what exactly did he suppose he could get for a billionaire who had everything they could possibly want already, to which Peter had poured a cup of water over his head and stalked off. 

Peter stopped outside a shop. It was a bookshop, but not one he remembered seeing before. It had rainbow flags flying outside, and he could tell by the displays in the window that he was exactly the target market. It looked old, and dusty, but it looked like it was open. He paused, and then pushed the door open. The bell above the door rang as he did so. He let the door close behind him. It felt empty, like he was the only person there. The shop smelt of old books and coffee. It was a funny place, with books in higgledy-piggledy piles on tables beside shelves, and old gay posters blu-tacked to the walls. There wasn’t just books: there was gifts and nick-nacks and bits and bobs all over the place. He could hear the whirring of an industrial coffee machine coming from above him. 

“Hey kid, you ok there?”

Peter jumped violently. He hadn’t noticed the older man behind the desk, watching him.

“Oh, um...”

“You look thirsty, and tired” the man said. “Stairs to the coffee shop are over there, just past the blue shelf”

“Oh, thank you”

Peter found the stairs and went up to the coffee shop, mostly because it was less awkward than trying to explain he wasn’t there for coffee, or just leaving. The upstairs coffee shop was much more modern looking and sleek, although quite interestingly decorated. There were a handful of people up there, and a couple of people behind the counter. One was an incredibly fierce looking drag queen, who waved her manicured nails at him when he appeared.

“Hey baby, you lost, sweetie?” 

“No, um, I just- uh..”

She laughed at him. “What can I get you, honey?”

“Um...” Peter approached the counter, too nervous of the drag queen to focus properly on the menu. “C-can I get a cappuccino please?”

“Sure thing, honey” She nodded at her colleague, and leant against the counter while they were making the drink. “You’re tiny, aren’t you? How old are you, baby?”

“I- uh, I’m fifteen. How old are you?”

The drag queen laughed. “A lady never tells. $2.50, please”

“Oh yeah, sorry” Peter handed over the money.

“Take a seat, baby; we’ll bring it over”

Peter was grateful for the excuse to leave the counter. He took an empty table over by the window, so he could people-watch. The drag queen soon brought his drink over, and he was surprised when she sat down opposite him. 

“What brings you here, baby? You’re looking tired. Fall out with the parents?”

“What?”

“Have they only just found out, is that it?”

“No! No, it’s nothing like that!” Peter said defensively. “I just kinda stumbled across this place. I’ve been out - out in town, I mean - for a while. And out in the other way as well, kinda, but, well. I- Uh. I didn’t know this place was here until just now. I’ve been looking in loads of shops today”

“Retail therapy?”

“Not really. I’m trying to find something for father’s day, but... Well, I’m a bit stuck. I can’t really do the whole generic Number One Dad mug thing, because I’ve got two dads”

“Aww baby. Tell me about them: maybe I can help”

Peter pressed his lips together.

“What’s up? Stranger danger?” she smiled a big lipsticky smile. Peter wasn’t sure if she was teasing him or not. “Most people call me Auntie. I’ve been a barista right out of high school, I work here during the day three days a week, and I work at some local bars as a performer two or three nights a week, depending on how in demand I am. I’ve been doing drag for about fifteen years now. There, now you know me, so you don’t have to be scared. So what’s your name, baby?”

“Peter”

“Peter what?”

“Peter... Parker. Parker-Stark”

Auntie’s eyes widened for a moment. “Ah, I thought you looked familiar! So you’re Tony Stark’s kid?”

Peter nodded. 

“So, daddies a mechanic, and other daddy is a nurse. Shame you’re not one of them; I’d be better able to help that way”

Peter wrinkled his nose at her suggestive comment. She laughed.

“Aw baby, you can’t expect people not to have inappropriate thoughts about an ex-playboy and someone as pretty as Loki Stark”

“Ok, but you don’t have to make it known” Peter said, crossing his arms over his chest.

Auntie grinned. “Sorry, baby. So, Father’s day. What were you thinking?”

“I don’t know. I’ve been real basic in the past, just cards, and chocolate for daddy Loki, and coffee for other daddy”

“Oh, so it’s ‘Daddy’ is it?”

Peter felt the blood rush to his face. “What? I’m adorable! Leave me alone”

Auntie laughed, pushing his coffee closer towards him. “Have your milk, baby”

Peter scowled, but he picked up his mug and took a mouthful anyway. He looked at Auntie over the rim of his mug. She was incredibly well made up, with perfectly teased strawberry blonde hair (definitely a wig, Peter thought), bright red lipstick, and gold eye shadow. She had fierce eyeliner wings, and her tight dress showed an awful lot of fake cleavage.

“My eyes are up here, honey” Auntie said, seeing him looking at her chest.

“Sorry. How do you make it look so real?”

“They’re flesh tone silicone, and you just use make up to get it to blend in. Add in a good bra, and you’re set to go” she leant closer to him. “Thinking of getting involved?”

Peter shook his head. “It’s not my sort of thing. I- uh, I don’t think I’d be any good at it”

“I don’t know, I think you could make a cute girly drag queen. I can imagine you with a bow in your hair, winged eyeliner, bit of blusher, pink lipstick, cute little dungaree dress - worn off the shoulder, of course”

Peter giggled. “I’m not sure about that”

“Hey, dungarees are cute! I bet you could rock them even without the slap. Doesn’t have to be a dress; you could get ordinary ones. Long trousers, maybe black denim? Or light blue”

“I’ll think about it” 

Auntie smiled. “So, what do we get for the Stark daddies for father’s day?”

Peter shrugged. “I’ve got no idea. I asked some friends, but they were useless. I looked at a load of Buzzfeed posts, but they’re all things for stereotypical dad’s. I don’t think mine would appreciate beer making kits and beard grooming sets”

“Really?”

“Well, daddy kinda has a very specific brand he uses, and a specific supplier, and I’ve never even seen other daddy with so much as stubble” 

“Hmm. How about just being a bit basic and giving them something with a personal touch?”

“Personal how?”

“Well, there’s lots of things. Hmm. Ah, have you got your phone with you?”

Peter unlocked it and handed it over. Auntie took it, flicking to the next screen. She paused.

“Wait, before I click on your camera roll, there’s no nudes on here, is there?”

Peter blushed furiously. “No, of course not!”

“Hey, I just want to be safe” Auntie shrugged, clicking on his camera roll and flicking through some of the photos. “You’ve got some pretty cute pictures on here. I’m guessing your friends took some of these?”

Peter nodded. “Flo likes taking photos of me. She’s good at candid shots”

“How about getting one of these framed or printed onto a canvas for them?”

“I don’t know. I wanted to get them something special”

“That is special. Your parents love you, right?”

“Well, yeah, but-”

“But what? Baby, they love you, and they’d love this, believe me”

Peter still wasn’t sure. “But what if they’re expecting something really cool and they open it and it’s just a picture of me?”

“I’d be happy with a framed photo from my kids for father’s day”

“You’ve got kids?!”

“Don’t sound so shocked!” Auntie laughed. “I’ve got three!”

“Wow. But aren’t you gay?”

“Aren’t you?” she shot back.

“I’m... I like both”

“So do I. But men are better” Auntie smiled at him. “I’ve got a daughter who’s a couple of years older than you, and I’ve got the twins. They’re seven”

“Oh right. Are they adopted?”

“No. My daughter is from a previous relationship, and me and the husband had the twins through IVF with a surrogate”

“Oh! So, are you dad to them, or are you mum?”

“I’m dad. The drag is just an act, baby. I’m not always this gorgeous” she winked. “I’m Auntie at work, and I’m plain old Arthur at home”

“Huh” Peter blinked. “So...”

“You’ve got some cute pictures on here. Choose one, get it printed, get it framed, put it in a nice little box or wrap it up nicely. Your parents will love it” she handed Peter his phone back. “Drink your coffee, baby. I’ll find out where the nearest place that does instant print photo’s is”

“Auntie?” Peter said when she stood up. “Thank you”

Auntie reached out and ruffled the boys hair. “No problem, honey”

-

Auntie gave Peter a little hug and sent him on his way the an address scribbled on a post-it note.

“Drop by again some time” she told him. Peter rather thought he would.

-

Peter tried to think of what kind of photo he should print as he walked to the shop Auntie had recommended. He knew he had a lot of photos on his phone, but a lot of the ones of himself were selfies. Well, Flo stole his phone a lot to take pictures of him, and they were usually pretty good. Maybe those would be better.

Once he reached the shop, he unlocked his phone, and saw that Auntie had left a photo up on the screen. Peter remembered the day it was taken. It wasn’t something that he really wanted his parents to know about. 

Armed with special new waterproof cases for their phones, Flo and Peter had snuck into the swimming pool at home fully clothed. It hadn’t gone exactly according to plan. They’d thought that, because there were so many ledges and walkways with either very shallow or no water at all, they’d be able to get through to the fairy cove without getting too wet. They were wrong. They both ended up in water up to their knees very quickly. Fortunately Peter was wearing shorts, and Flo could hold her dress up and keep her clothes mostly dry. However, after they’d been in the fairy cove for a good half an hour, they’d both slipped and ended up falling into the pool and getting soaked through. Still, at least they’d managed to take some decent photos before that happened, which had been their original goal. 

That was where the photo Auntie had left on the screen was from. Peter couldn’t help worrying that he’d get into trouble if his parents found out he’d gone into the pool fully-clothed, but he supposed they hadn’t actually done any harm by doing so. Besides, it was a good photo. Part of the pool could be seen in the photo, with its soft glowing lights adding a nice touch. The funny glowing lights from the little cubby holes in the fairy cove gave the photo a funny hue, mostly pink, but with a more green hue on one side. Peter could almost hear the rush of the water and the sounds of the harp-and-xylophone music as he looked at the photo. He was dressed simply, just in black denim shorts and a white tank top. He was leaning against the rocky wall, looking off over to the other side of the pool, sat with one leg straight and the other bent up, his hands wrapped round his knee. The lights were shining in his eyes, and he looked calm, and happy. Peter had been happy with this photo at the time. It had looked almost ethereal, like he was in a different world entirely. 

Peter plugged his phone into the photo machine, and brought that photo up on the screen, having a proper look at it. It still looked good on a decent sized screen. He wasn’t sure what size to get, and he hadn’t decided if he was going to get a canvas or just a print to frame, but he was glad of the self serve photo machine, as it meant he could take his time - and he didn’t have to try to talk to anyone. Eventually he chose the 8x12 print, deciding it was better to get something that would be ready almost instantly, rather than have to hang about waiting for a canvas. He slipped the print into the paper wallet provided, unplugged his phone, and stepped aside. 

Mercifully, the shop also sold frames. After a lot of looking around and thinking, Peter purchased a thick black glittery frame, deciding it would offset the picture well. He wasn’t sure where he’d find a box to fit it, but he was sure he’d passed a card shop before getting here, and they’d certainly have some appropriate wrapping paper. He just had to do that, maybe revert to type and also buy chocolates for Loki and artisan coffee for Tony, and then that would be father’s day sorted.

-

Peter’s phone rang. Peter slipped his shopping bag onto his wrist, and took his phone out of his pocket to answer it.

“Hello?”

“What are you doing in the dodgy end of town, young man?”

“Dad? Um-”

“I’m coming to pick you up right now. Go down to the Starbucks on the corner and stay there until I arrive” Tony said.

“Wait, are you tracking my location?!”

“Yes. Well, technically, FRIDAY is. Now do as you’re told. I’ll be there in three minutes”

Tony hung up. Peter sighed, and walked the few steps to the Starbucks, leaning against the wall. Tony’s car soon came into view, the window winding down as it stopped at the side of the road.

“Get in”

Peter did as he was told. He put his bag in the foot-well, careful not to reveal its contents. Tony drove off again as soon as Peter had put his belt on.

“Do you not pay attention to the news? Three kids around your age were stabbed here just two weeks ago, and that girl was kidnapped. You had no business coming anywhere near here. What on Earth did you think you were doing?”

“Dad, I wasn’t in any danger! And anyway, even if I was, it’s not like I’m just any other kid. I’m Spiderman!”

“Yes, but before that, you’re Peter Parker-Stark: my son. And I don’t want you anywhere where you can get into trouble, especially unprepared. You might be a good little neighbourhood Spiderboy, but how do you think you’d fare if the same thing happened to you as happened to that poor girl? You know they stuck her in the neck with a needle to knock her out before they took her? You know, you might whine about me keeping tabs on you, but if that girl hadn’t had that tracking app on her phone and Fitbit, they might not have found her”

“Dad, please, for Gods sake! You sound like Doctor Shefska on daddy’s ward, spouting scare stories like that”

“Hey, don’t you dare get cheeky with me!” Tony snapped, slapping the boys leg sharply. “I’ve told you time and time again not to go any further than the big library by the arch when you’re alone, and you disobeyed me anyway. This isn’t the first time you’ve done it, either. You’re on your final warning, young man. Go any further than the library again, and you’ll be grounded for a month - and that includes patrols”

“What?! Dad! Don’t you think you’re overreacting a bit?”

“Uh, you and that attitude are going to earn you a spanking, Mister” Tony said. “Stop being cheeky and trying to downplay this. You know I worry about you, and you know I give you boundaries for you own good; for your own safety. When FRIDAY alerted me to where you were, the first thing that went through my head was; ‘oh god what if he’s hurt?’, and considering recent events, it was a very real possibility. You’re not indestructible”

Peter sighed. “I know”

“What were you doing around there anyway?”

Peter shrugged. “Just walking, I guess”

“That’s not a good enough excuse” Tony shook his head, sighing. “Like I said; you’re on your last warning. We’ll just leave it at that for now... Did you talk to any strangers?”

“Dad, I’ve got selective mutism, remember?”

“Yes, but that doesn’t always apply with customer service staff, and we both know that strange little quirk”

Peter just raised an eyebrow at him and stayed quiet.

“What’s in your bag?”

“None of your business”

“Peter! How many times do I have to tell you not to be so cheeky?!” 

“Sorry...”

“What is it, then? Is it something naughty? Is it drugs?”

“What?! No! Of course it’s not drugs! What do you take me for?!”

“Your defensiveness isn’t exactly reassuring”

“Look, I’m not an idiot: I wouldn’t take anything illegal or harmful. I was against it all even before Macy showed me Trainspotting and scarred me for life”

“Hm, I’m still not happy about that” Tony grumbled. “That girl’s a right little madam. How did she manage to get hold of it, anyway? It’s an 18!”

“She’s said her cousin sent it to her” 

“I see. Must run in the family, then. You never should’ve watched it, even if you weren’t poorly”

Peter scowled at him. “Is that why you treat me like a baby all the time?”

“I’ve treated you like a baby for way longer than you’ve been ill for” Tony said. “I treat you like a baby because you are a baby, as much as you like to think otherwise”

Peter rolled his eyes, and looked out of the window.

Tony sighed again. “Let’s just get you home. Your father is gonna get home before us at this rate”

“He was at the hospital today?”

“Yeah, last minute meeting of some sort. Whatever”

“Are you gonna tell him about today?”

Tony went quiet for a moment. “Not this time. Let’s keep it between us. Just this once”

-

As per Tony’s prediction, Loki got home first. He wasn’t in a good mood. Ordinarily, Peter would have minded, but today it meant he could escape and sort the father’s day presents uninterrupted while his parents were talking. He was as careful and neat as possible while he wrapped up the coffee and chocolates. He put the print of himself in the frame, making sure it was lined up properly, and took extra care wrapping it, fixing a ribbon diagonally over the bottom right corner. He still wasn’t entirely sure about gifting a photo of himself, but he supposed he’d just have to wait and see if Auntie’s judgement had been trustworthy or not. He hoped it would pay off. 

-

A few days after Father’s day, Peter broke the rules again and ventured back into the bad area of town. He found the gay bookshop again, and pushed the door open. He knew there would be someone behind the counter this time, so he didn’t jump when they spoke.

“Hey kid”

“Hey...” Peter swallowed hard, and approached the counter. “Is- is Auntie working today?”

“Yeah, head on up: she should be on the counter”

Peter nodded his thanks, passed by the blue bookshelf, and went upstairs. He found he was pleased to see Auntie. She looked different today. She had the same hair, but she had black lipstick and smokey eye shadow, and she was wearing a tight low-cut jumper and leather skirt. She was serving a table when he walked in, so Peter could see her killer stiletto boots too.

“Hey, it’s baby Stark!” she said when she spotted him, and gave him a hug.

Peter was surprised, but hugged her back. She smelt good; of powder and expensive perfume. She held him at arms length.

“Have you come back just to see old Auntie, baby?”

Peter nodded. “Kind of. I can’t stay long though; I’ll get into awful trouble if dad finds out I’m here”

“Oh, is that so?” she said, putting her hands on her hips.

“It’s not what you think! He just worries about me being in this part of town”

“Well, I can’t blame him” she said, and sat down at a nearby table. “Come here, honey”

Peter sat down beside her, and Auntie pulled his chair closer. 

“How did father’s day go?”

“Oh! You remembered!”

Auntie smiled. “Of course. I asked you to come back, remember?”

Peter nodded. “Yep! And I nodded, didn’t I?”

“I was hoping to see you tarted up. Have you tried out dungarees yet?”

Peter giggled. “Not yet. No, I dropped by, just to say thank you again. You were right; they loved the photo. I used the one you left up on my phone”

“Show me again?”

Peter got out his phone and showed her the photo. She nodded.

“Good, I chose well! I knew they’d like it. I’m never wrong, you know”

“I know now” Peter smiled. “I got a nice frame for it, all black glitter. They moved some stuff around and put it in the centre of the mantelpiece in the main living room. I’m was kinda nervous giving it to them, so it’s good it’s appreciated, y’know?”

“I told you it’d go down well, honey. It’s a cool photo” Auntie said. “Can I get you a coffee?”

“Well... I’d really better not. I’ll try to come back for longer some other time, but I can’t really today”

“Aw honey, you’re a bit of a daddy’s boy, aren’t you? Don’t try to deny it; even the tabloid photos are proof enough” she took his hand and kissed it. “Look up the shop on Instagram when you get home. You can find my page through it, and maybe I’ll end up doing a gig near you some time, and you can come along”

“Ok, but I’m too young for clubs”

“But you’re not too young for cafe-bars. Get your parents to go along. Maybe Mr Playboy will let you hang about the bookshop if he knows old Auntie is here to keep an eye on you”

Peter smiled nervously. “I don’t know about that. I’ll give it a go anyway. I- well, aside from obviously being in a big gay household, I don’t really get to talk to many other people like me, and it’s kinda nice doing that”

“Honey, you enter a whole other world when you find more people like you. You’re young, and most people have to wait until they can go to gay clubs. You’re lucky to have places like this about. You’ll meet people if you go to them. You know it’s healthy to do so”

Peter nodded. “I know. Maybe I’ll guilt trip daddy that way”

Auntie laughed. “You’re a caution, baby”

Peter’s phone started ringing before he could reply.

“Is that daddy-Playboy?”

Peter looked at his phone, and nodded. He answered the call.

“I know where you are!” Tony said. “Don’t you dare leave that shop; I’ll be there to get you in five minutes. You are so totally grounded!”

Peter grimaced, glancing at Auntie. “I’ll stay put”

“You’d better! We’re gonna have a falling out one of these days, young man! See you in a minute”

“See you in a minute”

Peter ended the call, and sighed heavily. Auntie squeezed his shoulder.

“Don’t go looking so worried, baby” she said. “I’ll talk him round the moment he arrives”

Peter couldn’t help but grin. Maybe this fierce drag queen could mellow out his over-protective father. He certainly hoped so.

*

#my writing #fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #irondad and spiderson #this is longer than I expected but whatever #father's day

[ibisfarrow]

Memories (Short Story)

She sits across from me on the bed, back against the headboard. The naked, balled up doona between us is a barrier I don’t have the guts to cross, so we just sit and stare at each other. Her eyes wide and dark like an ogre spider, mine swollen and lined with red pencil veins. Spiralled and jagged and wet. She’s lanky with bones that jut out sharp and crooked, and even from here I can see the outline of pale ribs through her white cotton singlet. I’ve never noticed them before. I’ve never noticed how sick she looks. Her head falls back and slams hard into the wooden headboard, and Marvel figurines shake and roll down onto her shoulders, then fall behind the mattress where they’ll live until she inevitably leaves again. Beside me the bedsheet has a large pink vodka stain – a raspberry flavoured reminder of what everything that happened yesterday.

Her mother is on the phone somewhere at the other end of the house, yet her voice is still loud enough to shake the walls. I don’t know if it’s because of the volume or the tininess of the house, but I can hear every word. I focus on the one-sided conversation, if only to remind myself that there is still life outside of this room. I take special note of words like ‘police’ and ‘court’. I’m not surprised, considering the mess those bastards made of the front lawn, but it still makes my throat hurt and my breathing shaky. If the girl across from me heard what I heard, she doesn’t react. Maybe she expected it.

↔

She runs her fingers through his thick brown hair, making the ends brush his shoulders and tickle her nose. He whispers something in her ear and she laughs, rough and loud, into the side of his neck. He’s on the floor, back against the wall and legs out in front of him, and she’s in his lap with her arms around his neck. His feet are close enough to the couch that they almost touch it, so I slip off my sandals and poke him with my toes. He wraps his toes around mine, and they’re soft and warm.

‘When does your mum get home?’ I ask her.

‘Soon.’ She picks up her cruiser from the coffee table and takes a sip. Her bikini strap is too loose and slips over her bony shoulder, but she doesn’t notice. ‘Want one?’

I frown. ‘Does it taste good, or does it just taste like alcohol?’

‘You’ve never had a vodka cruiser?’ he asks. He crosses his legs, leaving my feet cold.

‘Dad says I can’t have alcohol until I’m sixteen.’

She gets up and pulls another bottle out of the cardboard box on the kitchen counter. ‘These just taste like soft drink. Besides, you’re close enough, so I doubt your mum would care.’ She drops it in my lap, then flops down beside me on the couch.

I open it and take a few big gulps. She’s right, going down it does taste like soft drink, but after a few moments it’s like my stomach lining has caught fire and I’m drowning a wave of nausea. I recap it and drop it into my satchel. ‘I’ll finish it later.’

↔

‘They even messaged my cousins in Germany. They sent screenshots of private conversations.’

I nod and try to look sympathetic, but it’s unnecessary. Her empty gaze is trained over my shoulder, presumably at the chipped, eggshell wall behind me. The paint was solid when her and her mother moved in, but over a couple months she destroyed it with pushpins and blu-tack, holding up dozens of photographs and drawings. Photographs and drawings that now sit crumpled on the carpet – pushpins and blu-tack still attached.

‘I can’t even ask him what I did. What did I do to make them hate me so much?’ Her skin turns red and her face wrinkles in a watery frown.

I say nothing.

I shouldn’t be here. I can’t help her.    

↔

‘Come on, Aisha’s not that bad!’

‘She’s a total bitch,’ she says and leans forward, as if she’s about to divulge a deep and well-guarded secret. ‘She even told Alex he should watch Rocky Horror because the main character is “also a transvestite”.’

I laugh. ‘She did not.’ I manoeuvre myself into a kneeling position, my elbows propped up on the mattress and a bottle of warm vodka in my hand. God, I love gossip.

She nods her head so hard I’m amazed she doesn’t get a concussion. ‘She did, I was in the chat!’

I shake my head. ‘Fine, but she’s not a bitch, just really fucking stupid.’

Some grunge band blares from her boyfriend’s phone, and I’m startled into letting go of my drink. Pink liquid pools on the baby blue sheets. The music stops.

‘Shit!’ he yells, ‘I’m so sorry. That wasn’t even the right song!’

I pull some tissues out of my bra and try to mop it up, but it only makes my hands sticky.

She grabs my arm. ‘It’s fine, I don’t really care.’

‘But won’t your mum?’

She shrugs. ‘Mum won’t notice if I don’t tell her.’

He plays Voltaire’s When You’re Evil next.  

↔

We sit on opposite ends of the couch, but there’s no barrier – fabric or invisible – keeping us apart. It’s our first sleepover in weeks, and the first time we’ve seen each other since I held her hand in court. His mother wore a red miniskirt and tried to flirt with the judge, which was funny. With the way that woman behaved it didn’t take long for an intervention order to be made. Afterwards I’d expected my friend to be sad, but she just seemed oddly resigned to it all.  

‘He once asked me, if we ever have a son, if he would be allowed to hit him when he’s bad.’

I sit up straighter. ‘No way, that’s awful.’

She nods but doesn’t look up from her phone. Probably talking to someone from her new school. ‘Did I ever tell you what happened at the cemetery?’

I shake my head. I didn’t know they ever went to the cemetery without me.

Her eyes tear up and she opens her mouth, but I interrupt her.

‘Never mind, tell me about it later, when the wound’s not as fresh.’

She nods and smiles weakly. I smile back, but I don’t mean it. I’m selfish. I’ve got a feeling I know what she’s going to say, and I can’t take it. I’ve heard the rumours going around about him lately. I’ve heard the accusation. Still, I want to hold onto that image I have of him – of the three of us – a little longer.

#short story #sad story #writing #my writing #story #literature #literary story #teen story

[glitterrhowell]

Chapter 10

Title: Seized

Pairing:  Daniel Howell & AmazingPhil (Phan

Word count: 2k

Warning/Genre: Rape/extreme violence/ depression/PTSD/Degradation/torture/ Non-consensual pretty much everything/Little!Dan/Daddy!Phil/Kidnapping

Summary: What starts out as a day in the Park for Little Dan and Daddy Phil turns into something terrifying when Dan is suddenly kidnapped. Will Phil be able to find and save him before it’s too late? Heavy trigger warning

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They were both quiet the whole ride home, Dan snuggled into Phil, and Phil aimlessly staring out the window. When the cab pulled up in front of their apartment, the driver helped get Dan's wheelchair out and waited patiently for Phil to transfer him over. He thanked and paid the driver and rolled Dan up to the door.

The elevator ride up to their apartment was quiet, and when they got there Phil fumbled trying to get the keys in the door to unlock it. Eventually, he was successful and he pushed the door open and rolled Dan inside.

"Ok, bear, what do you want to do now that you are home?"

"I want to watch a movie!" He said, throwing his hands up in the air excitedly.

"Ok let's get you into the lounge and get you situated."

"Can we watch Frozen?" Dan asked Phil as pushed him into their lounge.

"Of course." he said as a small smile crept across his face.

Phil helped Dan onto the couch and put the movie into their Blu-Ray player. He quickly settled down alongside Dan and wrapped his arm around his waist, pulling him closer.

Dan wasted no time resting his head on Phil's shoulder and melting into Phil's body. Not paying attention to the move, Phil was startled out of his thoughts when Dan started softly snoring. He smiled a little—Dan always looked so cute when he slept.

Phil turned his attention to the movie, realizing that they weren't even halfway through yet.

He didn't want to get up, but wanted to take this opportunity to get a few things done before Dan woke up again. As carefully as he could, he slid Dan's head off his shoulder and replaced it with a pillow. Dan stirred, but quickly rolled over and continued to sleep. Phil was as quiet as possible as he left the lounge, headed for the bathroom.

The doctor had instructed him to wash around his own stitches twice a day and to wrap it up afterwards. He had spent so much of his time taking care of Dan that he probably could have been taking better care of Phil's own stitches, but Dan was more important to him than himself at the moment. But with the few spare minutes he had, he figured he should probably try and take care of them. He unwrapped the current bandage that was wrapped around his hand.

He hissed in pain as the bandage stuck to the wound a little bit. The stitches were red and the edges of the wound were tinged green. Phil wasn't stupid—he knew that meant they were getting infected. He cursed. This is all he needed right now. He took a deep breath and started cleaning around the stitches. Once he was satisfied, he gently dried it with a towel and wrapped it back up. He hoped that if he started taking care of it now that the infection would go away. Phil walked back into the lounge, looking at Dan to make sure he was still asleep before he headed to their office. The work had piled up over the last few weeks and he hoped that he could answer a few emails before Dan woke up.

He spent a total of about thirty minutes trying to answer emails from their management and Youtube. He just couldn't do it—he had no idea what to say to any of them. He sighed deeply. He wasn't going to get any of this done today.

He pulled out his phone and almost found himself clicking on the little blue twitter icon, but he caught himself before he did. He wasn't ready to see what people were saying yet. He hadn't even been able to go on twitter and tell the fans that Dan had been found. Like a coward, he had let Louise and their friends tell everyone and deal with it all. Of course, no one knew exactly what had happened, so most of the answers they gave were very vague, but he figured Dan would want it that way anyway.

Phil looked at the time and realized he had been gone for over an hour, so he figured he should probably be getting back before Dan woke up.

Over the next few days, they settled into a routine. They spent most of the time playing with Dan's toys or watching movies. During the daytime, Dan was fine, but sleeping and night-time were a different story. Two or three times a night Dan would wake up screaming and crying, near a panic attack. Of course, Phil was there every time to comfort him, but whenever he asked what his dreams had been about, Dan said he couldn't remember. It broke Phil's heart every time this happened, but he made sure that Dan didn't pick up on it.  

During the times Dan would let Phil out of his sight, he spent most of his time either on the phone to the detectives or his mum. Each day he grew angrier and angrier—the police still had no idea who Seth's accomplice had been, and they wouldn't admit it to Phil, but they had pretty much given up trying to get anything out of him. Not only was Phil angry, he was terrified. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could dream about was his Dan being taken away from him again. He couldn't help but think back to his and Dan's pictures up on the wall at Seth's cabin. The men had been obviously been stalking them for a while. Phil was terrified and hadn't left the apartment since they had gotten home a few days ago. But as it reached their fifth day home, Phil had no choice but to leave the house, as today was Dan's first therapy appointment.

He hadn't mentioned this to Dan as he was worried his little brain wouldn't be able to comprehend exactly what therapy was. So all he told him was they were going to go visit a friend.

Phil spent the whole morning tense and on edge, even snapping once at Dan when he whined that he wanted Phil to play with him. Phil had felt guilty immediately and made it up to him by letting Dan help him make some cookies. But it was soon approaching the time that they had to leave. He sighed—they might as well get this done and over with.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Daniel Howell." Phil looked up from his phone as Dan's name was called out. He looked at Dan "Will you be alright back there by yourself?"

Dan bit his lip and slowly nodded his head, "I think so, daddy."

"Ok." he gave Dan a smile and squeezed his hand. "I will be waiting right here when you come out ok?"

"Ok, daddy." The nurse took ahold of his chair and pushed him along, and he gave one last look at Phil before he was pushed around the corner.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hi, Dan, my name is Dr. Miller, but you can call me Lela."

Lela hadn't been told much of anything about this patient. The only thing that she had been told was he had been through a very violent and traumatic ordeal. She had been selected to be Daniel's therapist because she specialized in people with different head spaces. She hadn't dealt with more than a few people who liked to let their minds slip into little space, but she had never worked with anyone who as stuck in that state.

She quietly observed the man who was currently putting together the puzzle she had gotten out for him. Neither one of them had broken the silence since Daniel had asked to put the puzzle together. If she didn't know better, she wouldn't guess the man sitting in front of her had gone through any type of ordeal. He looked like he didn't have a care in the world, giggling every once in a while when he would try and put together two wrong pieces.

She let him play for a few more minutes before she broke the silence.  

"So, Daniel, who was the man with you in the waiting room?"

Dan's eyes didn't even leave his puzzle.

"That's my daddy."

"Oh, that's nice. Daniel, what does your daddy do?"

Dan looked up from his puzzle and looked at her like she was stupid.

"He's my daddy he takes care of me and plays with me."

Lela smiled, not taking any offense to his tone.

"So, Daniel, why are you here today?"

He shrugged his shoulders "I don't know, daddy just said I had to talk to a friend of his."

So he didn't know what he was here for. Interesting.  

"Well, Daniel, I am here for you to talk to. Is there anything you would like to talk about?"

He shrugged his shoulders again.  

"I don't know."

His attention now back on the puzzle.

She sighed. It didn't look like they were going to make much progress this session. So she spent the rest of the session getting to know Dan and trying to earn his trust. She learned that both him and Phil were youtubers and that Dan loved to play video games. She also learned that pink was his favorite color while little, but he was aware when he was big he liked black. It wasn't much, but therapy took time and she was just glad Dan hadn't shut her out completely.

When their session was over she called for some help to wheel Dan back into the waiting room, following closely behind.

When they entered the waiting room, Dan quickly grabbed on to his daddy, whispering softly in his ear. She watched for a moment before she cleared her throat.

"Mr. Lester, can I please speak to you for a few minutes in my office?"

With a confused look on his face, Phil told Dan he would be right back and followed the therapist.

She held out her hand once they were in her office.  

"Mr. Lester, my name is Lela Miller, but you can call me Lela."

Phil took her hand.

"Hi, call me Phil."

"Alright, Phil, I justed wanted to go over Dan's progress with you."

"Ok." Phil shook his head at her, nodding

"Dan didn't tell me much, mainly he told me the fun things you two like to do together. But Phil, are you aware that Dan has no idea why he was brought here today?"

She watched his face for a reaction, but there wasn't one.

"He hasn't talked about anything since he was rescued. He says he doesn't remember anything."

"Well, this isn't incredibly rare with people who have suffered a traumatic event. The real thing we need to focus on his making Dan feel comfortable and safe, because he will remember eventually and he will need support and someone to talk to."

He shook his head.

"I also wanted to ask you how you were doing, Phil."

He looked at her startled.

"Why?"

"Because I know how difficult this can be on family members. This didn't just happen to Dan, but it happened to you as well."

She watched as a tear rolled down his face.

"No one has asked me how I was doing, and I have been putting all my energy into Dan—I'm not really sure how I'm feeling."

"That's alright, Phil, take your time."

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Phil broke it.  

"I'm mostly angry, but also scared."

"What are you scared of Phil?"

"I'm scared because they haven't caught the second guy yet. I'm scared that Dan will never be his old self. But mainly I'm scared that I'm not good enough to take care of him anymore."

"Why do you feel like that, do you think?"

He shrugged his shoulders.  

"Because it was my fault he was taken in the first place. If I had been paying attention then none of this would have happened."

Lela had met plenty of people who blamed themselves for traumatic things that happened to their partners, but this case especially broke her heart. She didn't know much about what happened, but she could tell that Phil loved Dan, and it was most certainly not his fault. They spent a few minutes talking and she gave Phil some homework to have Dan try and complete like drawing her some pictures and bring them back to Dan's next session. She said their goodbyes and Lela watched Phil push Dan out of the building. This was going to be a really tough case.

#daniel howell #daniel howell fanfiction #daniel howell fanfic #dan howell #dan howell fanfiction #dan howell fanfic #danisnotonfire #danisnotonfire fanfic #danisnotonfire fanfiction #amazingphil #amazingphil fanfiction #amazingphil fan fic #phil lester #phil lester fanfic #phil lester fanfiction #phanfiction #phan #Twigger Warning #tw: violence #tw: abuse #tw:blood #TW:Rape