#and seeing how things took quite the turn in last week's episodes i had a feeling they couldn't end it here

[lenteur]

eaw getting a second season!!!

#i predicted it #i knew they couldn't end it with only 16 episodes #and seeing how things took quite the turn in last week's episodes i had a feeling they couldn't end it here #and good for them! #hopefully they correct the mistakes of these last episodes and give us more context and backstories to some plot points #and please fully develop the tae su mi arc #for once i did have a good hunch i'm a genius lol #smal talk #eaw

[stevie-petey]

episode six: the monster

Steve’s looking at you now and you can see all the cuts and bruises on his face. You want to wipe all the blood away, to stitch him up and place him somewhere safe so that nothing else can hurt him. You want to do all of this and more as he stares at you and silently begs you to stay, but you can’t. You shake your head at him and once again his mask slips; he’s just a scared teenage boy. You want to reach out, to grab his hand and remind him that he’s good, but you don’t.

summary: so nancy and jonathan are a Thing now and you really just need a good nap, the three of you go shopping for monster hunting supplies (which honestly isn't the weirdest thing you've done this week), an old man sells you a sentimental knife, and steve kind of accidentally kidnaps you with a sexy black eye.

rating: general, slight violence and a lot of cursing though

warnings: blood, fem!reader, use of y/n, use of the word "queer" in a negative way, steve being an asshole

words: 8.1k

before you swing in: hey guys ! sorry for the delay in updates. finals season took me OUT and then life kinda happened and suddenly i was hiding out from my roommate turned middle school bully ??? idek. anyways, here's chapter 6 which features the iconic alley scene and some very sentimental stevexreaderxjonathan scenes (theyre a mess). enjoy !

-

“Geesh, you’re not a sleeping beauty.”

Dustin’s face greets you when you open your eyes. He’s hovering over you as the morning light streams through your curtains with a determined glint in his eyes. 

“What–?” Your brain hasn’t caught up with what’s going on quite yet, still half asleep. 

“Wake up! I’m going to Mike’s so we can all talk about yesterday and I promised to keep you updated, so… Here’s me updating you.” 

Hearing Mike’s name is what causes you to fully wake up. Mike. The Wheeler’s. Nancy. Steve seeing Jonathan with her on her bed. You quickly sit up and knock your head against Dustin’s, causing the boy to yelp.

“Ow! What is wrong with you?”

“Sorry,” you say, rubbing your head as your brother glares at you. “Wasn’t intentional, honest. Can you wait like twenty minutes so I can get ready? I wanna come with, I think Jonathan spent the night there and I need to talk to him.” 

Your brother frowns. “Why would Jonathan spend the night at Mike’s?”

“I’d really rather not talk about it.” You say, hoping it’ll be enough of an explanation for him.

Dustin studies you for a moment and you really hope that last night’s events aren’t written all over your face. Somehow, everyone seems to know what you’re thinking and feeling before you even do. 

“Fine,” he concedes, but as he leaves your room he calls over his shoulder, “I’m taking the last of mom’s pancakes though!”

You flop back onto your bed, throw a pillow over your face, and groan. Looks like you’re stuck with a banana for breakfast again. 

When you eventually manage to make your way into the bathroom and shower, your bones ache from pure exhaustion. As the warm water runs over your body, you’re not quite sure if the ache is more emotional or physical. Probably a mix of both. 

You can’t remember how you made it home last night, but slowly it comes back to you in flashes. 

Steve and his wonderful boyishness that has become a breath of fresh air to you. The way he greeted you so excitedly, how he had been worried about Nancy.

Nancy, who you had left alone with Jonathan because of your own pathetic feelings. The girl Steve Harrington is obviously in love with. The same girl Jonathan, your Jonathan, is beginning to fall in love with. 

Then you remember the hurt in Steve’s eyes when he saw Nancy and Jonathan together on her bed. The water suddenly burns and you gasp out in pain and adjust the temperature. 

You know that Jonathan would never do something like that, try to get with someone in a relationship, but lately it’s felt like you don’t really know him like you used to. 

Distantly you remember what Steve had said to you, how he’d seemed so hurt on your behalf, that Jonathan had “everything he could possibly want” when it came to you. Steve claimed you deserved better. You vividly remember that part, the way he said it with such certainty and sincerity that it had made your heart stutter for a brief moment. 

Dustin’s pounding on the bathroom door breaks you from your thoughts. “Dude, hurry up!”

You yell at him that you’ll be out in a second and nearly slip and die as you hurry to get out of the shower. For someone who swore last night not to let stupid boy drama not get in the way of finding Will, you’re really bad at doing it. 

As soon as you’re dressed and ready, you and Dustin bike to the Wheeler’s.

Mrs. Wheeler, as usual, answers the door and lets the two of you in. Dustin heads towards the basement door, but before he goes down you tap on his hat to stop him. 

“Remember what we talked about last night, okay? Friendship, it’s always worth it.” You tell him, and he gives you a nervous smile. He thanks you, takes a deep breath, and then heads downstairs. 

Once Dustin leaves you make your way upstairs towards Nancy’s room. You haven’t been there in years, so you secretly hope you’re remembering the Wheeler’s layout correctly. With every step you take closer to the girl’s room, your heart pounds within your chest. You feel the same wave of nausea that you felt last night. 

When you reach her door, you take a deep breath, just like Dustin had earlier, and will yourself to knock. You’re not sure what you’ll find on the other side of the door, or if you even want to know, but you remind yourself that you’re doing this for Will. 

It’s all for Will. 

You hear rustling in Nancy’s room after you knock, followed by a quiet “hide!” and a loud thud that you presume to be Jonathan. In another life you’d laugh at the situation, but hearing their frantic hiding only makes your nausea worse. 

“It’s just me,” you say through the door, somehow managing to find your voice. It’s weak and frail, but they seem to hear you regardless. 

“Y/N!” Nancy sighs in relief when she opens the door. “God, I thought you were my mom.”

“Bug?” You hear Jonathan’s inquisitive voice, and when you poke your head into the room you see half of his body wedged underneath Nancy’s bed. He gives you a sheepish wave and you find yourself suppressing a laugh. 

You let yourself into the room. “Great hiding place, bee. Mr. Wheeler would definitely never find you there.”

Nancy’s eyes suddenly widen. “Oh, we didn’t– it’s not like that, I promise. Jonathan was gonna sleep on the ground, but I was scared and I guess we just… Yeah.” 

You notice the way she desperately avoids your eyes, almost as if out of guilt. Jonathan is no better, his head ducked in shame as he also can’t quite reach your eyes. When he finally manages to, his smile is a hesitant one. “Her bed wasn’t the same as the bean bag, bug.” 

His words are meant to be a sort of peace offering between the two of you, you know this by the way Jonathan’s voice is soft and unsure. He knows he’s crossed an unspoken line between the two of you, and you’re too tired to argue. 

“Yeah, I’m sure it wasn’t.” You offer him your hand, which he gladly accepts, and you help him up from underneath Nancy’s bed. 

Nancy watches the two of you and the way you immediately fall back into your comfortable familiarity together. Jonathan stands slightly in front of you as he always does, he hasn’t let go of your hand just yet. You stroke your thumb across his fingers that are interlocked with yours. 

She clears her throat, sits down on her bed, and motions for you to join. “So, I guess you’re here for a reason.”

You gently remove Jonathan’s hand from yours and sit next to Nancy while he’s left to awkwardly stand before the two of you. “Well, yeah. You guys kinda disappeared on me last night.”

Nancy and Jonathan exchange an uneasy look, which only leaves you feeling uneasy as well. Jonathan walks over to her side so that now he’s standing behind her as she sits on the bed. “I’m sorry, bug. It’s just… well, last night was fucking terrifying.” 

“What happened?” You ask, now discarding your confusing feelings. Out of habit you find yourself scanning over their bodies for any injuries, just in case the two of them need any care. 

“The monster… we found him.” Nancy whispers. She tries to explain more, but the memories seem to come crashing back and she shudders. Without thinking, you grab her hand and try to steady her nerves; she smiles.

Jonathan sees Nancy’s fear and steps in to explain. “After you left yesterday, we searched the woods like we planned. We walked around for hours and found nothing, but then we found a dying deer and before we could kill it…” 

“Something dragged it into the woods.” Nancy finishes. 

You hold your breath, now very relieved you hadn't joined them last night.

Jonathan continues. They’d been separated as they looked for the deer and suddenly he could hear Nancy screaming for help, but no matter where he ran he couldn’t seem to find her. 

“I followed the sound of her voice, it was like she was right there, but she wasn’t.” 

Nancy sits stoically next to you, her eyes have glazed over. You feel horrible for her, and you vaguely remember something that Dustin had told you about the Vale of Shadows

The Vale of Shadows is a dimension that is a dark reflection or echo of our world. It is a place of decay and death. A plane out of phase. A place of monsters. It is right next to you, and you don’t even see it.

Slowly you piece it together. “Nancy, could you hear Jonathan, too?” 

She nods. “I was in the woods, but I wasn’t… I don’t know, it was– it was different there. Cold, I remember it was cold.” 

“And it was just like home?”

“What…” Nancy looks even more scared now. “How did you know that?”

You glance at Jonathan, worried that what you’re about to say will cause a reaction. “Will said the same thing when El was able to communicate with him.”

“Wait a minute,” Jonathan interrupts. “Nancy was in the… the Upside, or whatever Mike and them call it?”

“The Upside Down,” you confirm.

Nancy shudders once more. “I think that the monster lives there, feeding on that deer. So if Will and Barbara are there…” 

She doesn’t need to finish the sentence for you to understand what she’s getting at. Anything that feeds on something as big as a deer is fucking terrifying. If Will and Barb are really stuck in that dimension with the monster, then all your cautioning towards Dustin about getting his hopes up makes you feel ill. 

Will and Barb are basically trapped in that monster’s hunting ground. 

“My mom said she talked to Will.” Jonathan reminds the two of you. “And Y/N, the boys claim that El can still find him wherever he is. If he’s alive, there’s a chance that Barbara is, too.”

“He’s right, Nancy.” 

Nancy shakes her head. “But that means she’s trapped in that place.” 

“Look, this may not sound reassuring, but we have El and the boys. They’re smarter than the three of us combined.” Nancy and Jonathan look at you like you’re insane. “I know they’re young, but they’ve uncovered more than we have within the same amount of time. They’re the reason why we know about the Upside Down, and as we speak I’m more than certain that they’re out there right now trying to find a gate to the Upside Down.”

You take a deep breath. “Now, do I think they’ll find it? Absolutely. But do I fear they’ll find something even worse along the way? Also absolutely. But right now we need to focus on finding the damn thing so we can kill it and protect the kids in the meantime. If we do this right, we can eliminate any possible threat so that when the boys inevitably find another way into the Upside Down, we can just walk in and save Will and Barb.” 

While Jonathan still looks at you like you’re crazy, Nancy clenches her jaw and nods at you. “We have to find it again.” 

Despite how obviously terrified she still is, Nancy’s bravery impresses you. In a way, you suppose that Mike gets his unyielding loyalty from her, which if someone had told you that last week, you would’ve laughed in their face. 

But now? 

You’re relieved to have someone like Nancy Wheeler in your life, even if her presence has created some issues that you never would’ve thought possible. For better or for worse, she’s fiercely loyal and determined, just like you. 

Jonathan studies Nancy, clearly still worried about what she went through last night. “You wanna go back out there?”

The thought of her going back into the Upside Down makes you nervous. “Do we necessarily have to send Nancy back there? Can’t we just like, I don’t know, summon the thing? It clearly likes hunting for food in this dimension.”

“‘Hunting for food…’” Nancy mumbles to herself. She knits her brows together, seemingly drawing some conclusions. “When I saw it, it was feeding on that deer.”

“Poor deer,” you whisper, and Jonathan shakes his head at you to shut up. 

“Meaning it’s… it’s a predator, right?”

“Right.” Jonathan says while you go “Unfortunately.”

Nancy is on a roll now, her usually confident demeanor now back. “And it seems to hunt at night, like a–like a lion or a coyote.” She grabs a textbook that had been discarded on her bed and flips to a page showing other dangerous predators.

“But don’t most predators hunt in packs?” You ask, which has been something on your mind recently. Sure, you know there’s a monster, but how can you be sure there’s only one?

Nancy bites her lip. “Yeah, but for some reason this thing is always alone… like a bear.”

“Honestly, I’d take a bear over whatever the hell we’re dealing with here.” Jonathan once again shakes his head at you, but you wave him off. “Let me lighten the mood, damn.”

“Thanks, Y/N.” Nancy smiles at you, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes before she continues explaining. “Jonathan, remember at Steve’s, when Barb cut herself?”

For a brief moment you see guilt flash across his face at the mention of that night at Steve’s, the photos he took, and he meets your eyes. “Yeah, I remember.”

“And then, last night, the deer…”

Now you’re beginning to understand. “There was blood, wasn’t there?”

“There was,” Nancy now flips to a page about sharks, which you can’t help but frown at. Maybe you really weren’t following along. She begins to ramble about how sharks can detect the smell of blood from a quarter mile away. 

“I thought I escaped all this science stuff when I tagged along with you guys instead of the boys,” you mumble, trying your best to follow along. 

“The thing can detect blood, bug.” Jonathan clarifies. 

“But it’s just a theory,” Nancy corrects, now turning around so that she can face him. 

They stare at one another, almost as if they’ve now synched together and created a world outside of yours, and once again you feel like there’s no room for you here anymore. 

“We could test it.” Jonathan says, still staring deeply into her eyes. “But if it works…”

“At least we’ll know it’s coming.” 

You notice how Nancy leans in close to Jonathan, more than she once did before, as if he’s her only source of support after what happened last night. In a way, you suppose that now he is. He was the only one there last night when the monster almost got her; they went through something horrible together. 

Something that creates a bond like no other. 

Suddenly Nancy’s door rattles, causing you to jump in her bed while she grabs for Jonathan’s hand. You don’t hear the exchange between her and her mom, too busy reeling over the fact that Jonathan’s fingers are interlocked with hers. 

Jonathan, the boy so against physical touch that the only person he lets hold his hand is you, which took almost a year of friendship to even make him comfortable with. Now here he is, holding Nancy’s hand after only a few days. 

Your heart hurts. 

You know it’s pathetic to be so upset over a natural reaction. Nancy has been through something traumatic and Jonathan had been the one there for her, so naturally she reached out for him. While you know it doesn’t mean anything, it still fucking hurts. You’ve always been secretly elated by the fact that you were the only one who received Jonathan’s affection, his forehead kisses and hair ruffles and his hugs. 

Holding his hand has become second nature to you, long familiar now with the way his fingers feel between yours. 

And now they’re between Nancy’s. 

“Y/N? You still with us?”

Nancy waves a hand in front of your face, and suddenly you’re aware of how long you’ve been staring at the two of them. “Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m here… still here.” 

“You alright, bug?” Jonathan asks, now a bit worried about you. 

“Peachy!” You try desperately to make your voice light, but the nausea that hasn’t left you since last night once again threatens to make you sick. “Enough about me, though. What I’m hearing is that we need to buy some monster hunting supplies. I mean, unless we plan on beating it with my humor.”

You wink at them, and while Nancy seems reassured by your bravado, Jonathan knows better. He raises his eyebrows at you and tilts his head and you know he’s asking what’s really going on? and all you can do is shake your head in a please don’t ask any more questions or I will sob right here right now way that only he can understand. 

Nancy doesn’t notice this exchange and instead gets up from her bed. “Well, if we’re going shopping for supplies then I should get ready. Y/N, I’m sure my mom will give you some pancakes if you ask.”

Right on cue, your stomach rumbles. “Thank God she loves me. I’ll smuggle some up for you, bee.” 

He thanks you before you and Nancy exit the room. She heads for the bathroom while you make your way downstairs.

“Y/N? I didn’t know you’d gone upstairs!” Mrs. Wheeler greets you and immediately you’re handed a steaming plate of homemade blueberry pancakes. 

Mr. Wheeler huffs. “Do we have to feed the entire neighborhood?”

“Good morning to you too, Ted.” 

The man glares at you as you thank Mrs. Wheeler for the food. You make up a quick lie about working on an assignment with Nancy and that you’d prefer to eat in her room so you can finish up an equation you’d been in the middle of. 

“So, may I bring it upstairs?”

“Well…” Mrs. Wheeler purses her lips, not too keen on the idea. 

You give her your best and most parent pleasing smile. “I promise I’ll be careful, not a drop of blueberry will get anywhere. Scout’s honor!”

“Oh, alright. But please tell Nancy that this will only be a one time thing”

“Of course, Mrs. Wheeler.”

You leave her alone with a grumbling Mr. Wheeler and a fussy Holly.

–

Nancy is still in the bathroom when you return and Jonathan is awkwardly sitting on her bed, looking around the room as if he’s in some foreign land. 

“Ya know, I’ve never been in a girl’s room before.”

“Gee, thanks.” You scoff at him, setting the plate of pancakes down on Nancy’s desk before digging in. You’re starving. 

“That’s not what I meant, bug.” He flashes an apologetic smile. “Your room is just… Well, it’s not very girly, is it?”

If you hadn’t promised Mrs. Wheeler you’d be careful with the food upstairs, you would’ve thrown a piece of pancake at Jonathan’s face. “Dude, shut up.”

“Shit, sorry.” He makes his way over to the desk and wraps his arms around you as he always does. “What I meant is that this room is so pink, while yours has more comics than I can count.” 

“Don’t forget Spidey posters,” you say with a mouthful of food while simultaneously handing a piece to him. “Anyways, I like pink. I think this room is lovely, honestly. I wanted to paint mine this color when we first moved, but Dustin said if I painted the room pink then he’d never hang out with me in there. Alas, I forfeited.” 

Jonathan laughs and accepts the pancake. “Him and the boys have you wrapped around their little fingers. You know that, right?”

You lean against him, relishing in the feeling of his strong chest against your back. “Mmm, I know. I’m a sucker for those idiots.”

Jonathan tightens his hold around you and draws you deeper into his chest. “I know, it’s what I love the most about you.”

His words are like ice against your skin and suddenly his arms feel suffocating around you. 

You clear your throat and lean forward to lessen his hold on you. “Right, well. You just love it because they listen to me and you can round them up better when I’m around.”

“It’s not just because of that, bug.” Jonathan draws you in again and you’re too weak to fight it. He rests his chin against your head. “I love how you love those around you.” 

The air has become thick between the two of you. 

The way you love people terrifies me, Jonathan’s words from a few days ago echo within your head.

So what’s the truth? Why is he saying all of this?

“Bee,” you bring your hands up and hold onto the arms that are still securely around you. You’re not sure what exactly you want to say, how to explain the warmth you feel for him that simmers within you when he says your name or the way it turns into a furious boil when he looks at Nancy like she’s the damn moon. “You promised you’d call last night.” 

“I know–”

“I was worried about you.”

“And then I ditched you.”

“Again, might I add.”

You put her first, you think.

Jonathan sighs and places a kiss against your hair. “I know.” 

A tense silence follows. Mrs. Wheeler’s wonderful pancakes now taste like cement in your mouth. God, you wish things could go back to how things once were. You miss when Jonathan could wrap his arms around you and the weight of it wasn’t so crushing with all its unspoken implications. 

“I’m sorry, bug. I really, really am sorry.” His voice is strained and he tightens his hold even more, as if to remind himself that you’re still there with him. “I was so scared last night, and had you been the one taken instead of Nancy…”

“But I wasn’t. She was.” You try to keep any emotion out of your voice. 

“I know… I just, I had to make sure she was okay. I promise that nothing else happened. You know that right? Just, please tell me you believe me.” His voice cracks and you finally turn around to wrap your own arms around him. 

“Bee, of course I believe you.” Your words are muffled against his stomach, but he hears you. He always hears you. 

You understand why he stayed at Nancy’s, you really do. But it doesn’t make the sting of it any less painful. You feel awful about what she experienced last night, no doubt forever traumatized by it, but the bitter taste of no longer having Jonathan all to yourself is something you’re still getting used to. 

“You forgive me?” He asks, so faintly you almost don’t catch it.

You lift your head up and catch Jonathan’s eye. “There’s nothing to forgive, bee.” 

And you mean it.

The smile Jonathan gives you as a response, the smile that has always made your knees weak, is just yet another reason why you can’t ever risk what you have with him. 

– 

This may come as a shock to some, but you’ve never set foot in the army supply store. 

The place makes you uneasy. You’ve never been comfortable around weapons, and like you told Nancy earlier: if it ever came down to it, you’d prefer to use your charm (but mostly your wits) rather than violence. It just isn’t your thing. 

While you and Jonathan wander aimlessly around, Nancy seems to know exactly what you guys need. She begins throwing things into the basket around her arm without hesitating and you exchange a look with Jonathan. Clearly it’s a good thing you’ve wrangled Nancy into this mess. 

You wander some more and break away from the group, eyeing the insane amount of weapons, traps, and knives offered in the store. It’s overwhelming and you realize you have no real idea what you’ll even need. Guns unnerve you, the bat Nancy brought just seems silly to use. So what does that leave you?

Your eyes land on a knife with both its ends extended. Its handle in the center is a polished wood that’s a deep ember and the blades themselves are sterling silver that glisten in the dim store lighting. It’s a beautiful weapon. 

As you reach for it to inspect it, one of the store employees, an older man, walks up behind you. 

“That’s a switchblade. It was donated to us years ago.” You jump at the man’s words and he flashes you an apologetic smile. “Sorry, miss. Didn’t mean to scare ya.”

“It’s okay, it’s not your fault. I’m just more skittish than usual this week.” You’re not sure why you admit this to the man, and when he gives you a curious look you clear your throat and change the topic. “You said this was donated?”

“Oh, yes! Here, have a feel for it.” Before you can stop him, he places the knife in your hands. 

Your fingers skim over the smooth wood and you notice some words engraved in it. The letters are scuffed, presumably from age. “Was there writing on it?”

The old man’s smile becomes a sad one. “The switchblade was from this old man, he made it for his wife and claimed she loved to keep him on her toes. So, he had the word ‘button’ engraved in the handle because–”

“She always pushed his buttons?”

“Yeah,” the man laughs. “That’s exactly what she did.” 

There’s a far off look in the man’s eyes, as if he’s remembering a warm summer day from his childhood; bittersweet and filled with fondness. He reminds you of your grandpa whenever someone brings up your grandma who died when you were young. You roll the blade over in your hands. “You knew the woman, didn’t you?”

“I did, but she’s long gone now,” he confirms, his voice wobbling.

“I’m sorry for your loss, sir.” You reach over and place your hand on his forearm, which he smiles at. 

“Don’t be. Martha would be glad someone like you has her knife, now.” 

You immediately drop your hand and try to give the switchblade back. “Oh, no, I can’t possibly take this–”

“It’s yours. You’re the only one who has paid any attention to it. I’ll show you how to use it if you make me a promise.”

Before you can argue more, Jonathan calls out from a few aisles down. “Bug? Where’d you go?”

“I’ll be there in a second, bee!” You turn back to the man. “What kind of promise are we talking about?”

“Bug and bee? Martha called me birdy because a bird swooped on me the first time I ever met her,” the old man chuckles with affection. “Anyways, promise me that you’ll use this with love. I may own this store, but violence never leaves much room for love.” 

The agreement comes easily to you. “Of course.”

And with that, the old man shows you how to flip the switchblade open. It only takes a simple flick of the wrist for the blade to glide back into the handle in the center, and with another flick they smoothly glide back out once more; the way the blades move in sync leaves you in awe.

“You can use both the blades or only one, but I sense that you know that things are always stronger together.” The old man says, a glint in his eyes as he hands the switchblade back to you. 

You smile at him and try it out yourself; the switchblade fits perfectly in your hand and you’re easily able to get the blades in and out. As you’re admiring the way the blades balance each other out, Jonathan appears by your side. 

“Hey, ready to check out?” 

You nod and thank the old man, who waves you off with a friendly goodbye. 

“Who was that?” Jonathan asks once you’re out of earshot from the man. 

You show him the switchblade. “You remember that theory you had about me attracting old people? You’re gonna love this.”

– 

Nancy plops down bear traps, gasoline, and a multitude of other supplies she acquired while you were off talking to the old store owner. The cashier, a significantly younger looking man, looks at the three of you as if you’re insane. 

“And I’ll have four boxes of the .38s.” Jonathan says, and you flash the employee your award winning smile just in case. You recognize how insane this all looks.

“What are you kids doing with all this?” The employee asks, and you Jonathan both instinctively turn to Nancy for help. 

She shrugs, playing the question off well. “Monster hunting.”

The guy laughs and finishes ringing you guys up before the three of you head out to Jonathan’s car. He’s carrying most of the stuff in a box while you and Nancy start loading the bags into his trunk. You quickly help him with the box once you’ve placed your bags down.

“‘Monster hunting’?” Jonathan teases and Nancy just smirks. 

“How do you think that guy would react if he knew we were telling the truth?” You snort and Jonathan can only shake his head in amusement. 

Nancy laughs and bumps her shoulder against yours. “You know, last week I was shopping for a new top I thought Steve might like.” 

Hearing Steve’s name makes you freeze. You completely forgot that Steve had been there with you last night at the Wheeler’s. He had seen Jonathan and Nancy together on her bed. You remember the anger in his eyes and your heart sinks. King Steve would never just let something like that go.

“Hey, uh, Nancy?” You try to interrupt the girl, but she’s too focused on her story.

“It took me and Barb all weekend, it seemed like life or death, you know? And now…”

“You’re shopping for bear traps with Jonathan Byers and Y/N Henderson.” 

You grab at Nancy’s jacket to try and get her attention, but she only has her eyes set on Jonathan. “Nancy, I have something to tell you–”

“What’s the weirdest part? Me or the bear trap?”

“Guys I really need you to listen right now–” Again they ignore you, lost in their own little world that you still don’t have access to. 

For a moment you wonder if you even should warn them, but you know it’d be wrong not to. You could be imagining it, but your new switchblade almost seems to warm up within your pocket as if to remind you of your promise to the old man. 

Nancy’s eyes shine as she looks at Jonathan and you want to scream. Now is not the fucking time. “You. It’s definitely you.”

You clap your hands in front of their faces, finally breaking the two of them out of their spell. “Hey! Assholes! Trying to save your asses!”

Jonathan bats your hands away from his face. “What are you talking about?”

“Steve, he, uh…” You take a deep breath, trying to figure out how the hell you’re supposed to word this, before a car honks and some creep calls out to Nancy. 

“Can’t wait to see your movie.” The boy laughs, which causes your blood to turn cold. The Hawk movie theater, where Jonathan works… In a twisted way, Steve Harrington is a fucking revenge genius.

“What the hell was that?” You hear Jonathan mumble, but your ears are ringing. 

Nancy turns to you, now with distrust in her eyes. “Steve. You said his name.”

“Nancy–I, I forgot and–” You stumble over your words as the girl’s eyes harden. You didn’t mean for this to happen, you don’t know how you forgot. She doesn’t wait for you to finish whatever the hell you were about to say and starts running after the car. You’re quick to follow after her, already knowing what you’ll find. 

“Where are you guys going?”

“Just come on, Jonathan!” You shout behind you. 

Nancy sees the board before you do and the gasp she lets out makes you want to cry for her. There, in big, ugly red letters on the Hawk’s clapperboard are the words spelling out “All the Right Moves Starring Nancy the Slut Wheeler”. 

It’s an awful, awful fucking thing. 

And it’s Steve’s work, you know it is. 

You hear Jonathan gasp out behind you and you see the crowd that begins to form around the three of you. Everyone stares at Nancy and whispers cruel things about her and it takes everything within you not to cause a scene. How fucking dare they. They have no right. Steve had no fucking right. 

In the midst of your anger you notice the tears beginning to form in Nancy’s eyes and you immediately run over to her side and grab her hand. You pull her into a hug and whisper reassurances, promising her that it’ll all be okay. She lets you hold her and you feel so fucking awful. You should’ve done more to protect her. 

Then, you hear the distinct sound of a spray paint bottle rattling followed by Tommy Hagan’s screech of a laugh. Nancy tears herself from your grasp and runs into the alley where the noise is coming from. You follow after her and see Steve and his gang spraying even more things onto the Hawk walls. 

There’s a steely look in Nancy’s eyes and you worry for a moment that she might hurt someone. It’s not that you don’t think it’s warranted, but you’re sure Jonathan’s boss has already called the cops on the teens and they’ll be here soon. Nancy can’t afford to get into any trouble right now. 

“Nancy, I don’t think you should approach–”

She ignores you and angrily marches over to Steve. 

“Hey there princess!” Carol sneers, and you have to refrain from spitting on her. Right now this is about Nancy, you need to make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid and to also ensure she knows that you’re right behind her to support her. She needs to know that you’re here for her. 

“Uh oh, she looks upset.” Tommy teases. When he sees you, he lets out another cackle. “Holy shit, Harrington. You were right! Henderson really is a pathetic push over if she’s here with the girl who slept with her boyfriend!” 

Tommy’s words enrage you and you’re about to just say fuck it to your no violence policy when Steve shuts him up. “Knock it out, Tommy. I told you Henderson’s with us–”

Nancy’s slap catches both you and Steve off guard. Everyone gasps in shock but you start laughing, immensely proud of the girl’s strength. “Nice one, Wheeler.”

She spares you a quick glance before steering her glare back at Steve. “What is wrong with you?”

Steve clenches his jaw. “What’s wrong with me? No, what’s wrong with the two of you?”

“The two of us?” Nancy asks. Steve juts his chin in your direction and she turns around, now more confused and hurt than ever. “What does Y/N have to do with any of this?”

A lump of anxiety forms in your chest. “Nancy, I can explain–”

“I was worried about you,” Steve lets out a bitter laugh and distantly you remember saying those exact words to Jonathan a mere hour ago. You guess you understand the boy more than you may want to. “I can’t believe that I was actually worried about you.” 

Nancy opens her mouth to respond but Steve cuts her off, now walking towards you. “And you… I always knew you were too nice for your own good, but defending the girl who stole your boyfriend?” He hovers over you; you can smell his expensive cologne this close as he says his next words so low that they almost come out as a whisper, “well, I expected more from you, Y/N.”

You freeze, overwhelmed with his presence. He lingers, you’ve never been this close to him, his eyes are darker than Jonathan’s and filled with more disappointment than anger. You know he can see right through you in a way that fucking terrifies you; he knows. 

“What are you talking about?” Nancy exclaims, effectively breaking whatever moment was going on between you and Steve. He backs away, his eyes still lingering on yours, before facing Nancy once more. 

Your words catch in your throat, still reeling from your encounter with Steve, so it’s Carol who breaks the silence. “I wouldn’t lie if I were you. You don’t want to be known as the lying slut now, do you?”

“Don’t call her that,” you manage to say, though you can’t seem to stop looking at Steve, who is looking right back at you. 

“Speak of the devil,” Tommy’s voice alerts you of Jonathan’s arrival. You look up and see what the idiot has written on the wall behind him.

“‘Byers is a perv’? Wow, you guys are geniuses when it comes to insults.” You snort, feeling Jonathan place his hand on the small of your back to steady you. He can sense your anger brewing. 

“It’s okay, bug.” He whispers. You relax a bit into him, but you’re still fuming. Steve watches the interaction with an interest in his eyes that lets you know Jonathan’s tenderness with you has only pissed him off more. 

Steve points at the two of you, looking around at his friends. “Aww, how sweet. You guys see that? Tell me, Henderson. Did he whisper sweet nothings into your ear after he slept with my girlfriend?”

Both Jonathan and Nancy speak at once. He denies you two being together while Nancy now understands that Steve had seen her and Jonathan in her room last night. 

“Henderson and I both, actually.” Steve corrects, and you want to punch him. 

Jonathan turns to you, guilt creeping into his voice. “You saw?”

“Now isn’t really the time, we need to help Nancy–”

“Look, I don’t know what you think you saw, but it wasn’t like that.” Nancy says, looking at Steve and then you. “I promise, Y/N. Nothing happened.”

Steve rolls his eyes. “Right, that’s what Henderon said. You just let him into your room to… study?”

“I was telling the truth.” You grit out, but Steve and the others ignore you.

Tommy steps in front of you and Jonathan. “Or for another pervy photo session?”

Jonathan steps towards the boy but you grab his jacket, not allowing him to go any further. You understand he’s angry, but just like how he won’t let you do anything stupid: you won’t let him, either.

Nancy shakes her head furiously. “We were just–”

“You were just what? Finish that sentence,” Steve steps closer to Nancy now and you find yourself preparing to step between them if needed. “Finish. The. Sentence.” 

The only sound in the alley is the sound of Nancy panting. She can’t think of what to say, what can she even say? Steve won’t believe her regardless. To him, she’s already done the unspeakable and hurt him in the worst way imaginable. You feel for the two of them, no one can possibly win in this situation. 

When Nancy doesn’t say anything, the angry expression on Steve’s face slips for a moment and you see the heartbroken boy underneath his mask. It happens only for a second, but you see it. You know you saw it. 

“Go to hell, Nancy.” He scoffs. 

“Harrington, you don’t mean that.” You say, trying to help him out. He’ll regret burning this bridge with Nancy, you can see how deeply he cares for her. He loves her, even if he can’t admit it. If he walks away now, he could lose her. 

While you’re talking to Steve, Jonathan breaks free from your grasp and pulls Nancy away, which only seems to upset him more. 

“You said yourself that we aren’t friends, Henderson. You don't know me. As for you, Byers, I always took you for a queer. I guess you’re just a little screw-up like your father.” 

Steve begins to push Jonathan now, but Jonathan has harshly grabbed your arm to pull you away. He doesn't want you involved in this, you know he just wants to get you and Nancy safely out of the situation, but you resist him anyways and try to push at Steve.

“What, you're gonna help your douche of a boyfriend?” Steve sneers at you, and Jonathan will definitely leave bruises on your arm with how tightly he has to hold you back. “Oh, yeah. That house is full of screw-ups.”

He pushes Jonathan again and this time you manage to spit at his feet. “Shut the fuck up, Harrington.”

“I’m just telling the truth. You know, I guess I shouldn’t really be surprised. A bunch of screw-ups in your family.”

Jonathan stops now. You do the same. Nancy sees this and urges you to keep walking, but you and him exchange a look. You hate violence, you really do, but the Byers family is your own family. Aside from how protective you are of them, you also know the anger that Jonathan has buried within him. If Steve keeps pushing it, you’re afraid of what Jonathan may do.

“I mean, your mom? I’m not even surprised what happened to your brother.” 

You hate violence. You could never, ever hurt anyone. But you’re starting to feel really fucking close to understanding why people seem to enjoy it. “Leave his mom and Will out of this.” 

Steve ignores you and continues spewing bullshit. Jonathan is tense next to you and it’s only now that you notice his clenched fists and his ragged breathing. Steve has gone too far.

“Steve, shut up!” Nancy begs as you now leave Jonathan’s side to begin pushing Steve back. A fight cannot break out. It’s broad daylight and too risky. You can’t let Jonathan put himself in danger. 

“Harrington, you need to leave.” You urge him as you push against his chest, but he just gently pushes you aside and follows after Jonathan.

“But the Byers?” He keeps hitting Jonathan’s back and you have to use all your weight to pull him away. It’s no use. “Their family, it’s a disgrace to the entire–”

Jonathan’s punch lands perfectly upon Steve’s face.

In any other moment, you’d find the accuracy incredibly hot. 

Instead you push the thoughts aside and rush over to him while Steve regains his composure. “Bee, listen to me. Cops could be here any second, you can’t fight–”

You scream as Steve tackles Jonathan onto the car and then the ground. Nancy begs them to stop and has to wrap her arms around you to keep you out of the fight. The sound of skin hitting skin sickens you. 

“Nancy let me go,” Steve lands another punch on Jonathan and the sound his head makes when it hits the ground causes you to cry out. 

“Y/N, Jonathan wouldn’t want you to jump in–”

“I have to help him!” The pure anguish in your voice is what makes Nancy finally let you go. You immediately rush over and try to pry Steve off of your friend, but he doesn’t see you approach and almost lands a blow at your face. 

Jonathan sees this and grunts out, “don’t touch her,” before punching Steve in the face once more and throwing him off. They’re both standing now as Steve’s friends egg the fight on and Nancy pleads for them to stop. You tug at the boys’ clothes to try and break them apart, but you know you’re weak against them. You force yourself to think of something else, and right as you’ve formed a plan, Tommy is the one who steps in and punches Jonathan.

“Get out of here, man.” Steve yells, not wanting anyone to fight his battles for him. 

You slap Tommy across the face. “Fuck off!”

The boy raises his fist to punch you and you don’t have time to do anything else besides flinch and brace yourself for the hit, but Steve intercepts it. “Tommy! I said get out of here!”

You’re in a daze as you process what’s just happened, but then Jonathan starts throwing more punches and suddenly Tommy has his arms around you to hold you back. You try to break out of his grasp, but he’s a lot damn stronger than Nancy. 

All you can do is helplessly watch as your best friend beats Steve Harrington’s face in. He lands one punch, then two, then three, and for a horrifying moment you’re afraid that Jonathan might actually kill him. 

“Jonathan! Stop!” You scream, tears now streaming down your face. 

He has Steve pinned on the ground by the time the cops come. 

“Shit, the cops!” Tommy lets go of you to help break up the fight right as the two officers arrive. They struggle to get Jonathan off of Steve and somehow he manages to punch one of the cops in the nose. Of course he fucking punches a cop in the nose.

You rush over to try and help, but as soon as the cops have Jonathan you feel yet another pair of arms wrap around you. You don’t know who it is, but they start to drag you away while the cops arrest Jonathan. You try to twist around to face your assailant, thrashing and kicking. “Why do you all keep grabbing me?”

“Fuck, Henderson! Stop kicking me, I’m already bleeding!” Steve groans, still carrying you in his arms as he and his friends flee the crime scene. 

You struggle more against him, but you’re exhausted from your previous attempts of breaking up the fight and you’re still crying. You can’t do anything besides making it extremely difficult for him to carry you and throw out a multitude of insults and cuss words. You have to get to Jonathan.

Once they’re a few yards away, they slow down and Steve finally places you back on the ground, though his arms remain around you. You manage to free your own arms and begin punching him in the chest. “Let go of me! Jonathan just got arrested because of you!” Every word you say is followed by a punch. 

“Jesus Henderson! I just saved your ass, quit it!”

“Saved my ass? You just beat up my best friend and he’s bleeding and needs my help and–”

“He’s a cheater! So is Nancy! They deserve each other and if you go back there right now you’ll be arrested and they’re sure as hell aren’t worth getting arrested over!” Steve is screaming at you and shaking you by the shoulders, urging you to understand. 

“How many times do I have to tell you I’m not with Jonathan? And you’re wrong! It wasn’t like that between him and Nancy, you have to understand that.” You scream back at him, faintly aware of Steve’s friends watching in the background. 

He runs a hand through his hair. “I’m not a fucking idiot, Y/N.” 

“You sure about that?” 

“God, you’re so naive.” Steve shakes his head. “It’s always the nice ones who are the most naive.”

His words cut through you; you look him in the eyes, “Get fucked, Harrington.” 

Steve lets go of you, surprised by your words while his friends gasp. “I was just trying to help.”

His voice is soft, as if he’s afraid to admit this to you, and you know that in his own way he means it. Steve had only been trying to help, but he hurt the people you love in the process. You hesitate, unsure how to respond.

Steve’s looking at you now and you can see all the cuts and bruises on his face. You want to wipe all the blood away, to stitch him up and place him somewhere safe so that nothing else can hurt him. You want to do all of this and more as he stares at you and silently begs you to stay, but you can’t. You shake your head at him and once again his mask slips; he’s just a scared teenage boy.

You want to reach out, to grab his hand and remind him that he’s good, but you don’t.

Instead, you turn away and run back towards the alley and Jonathan.

-

⌑ series masterlist

⌑ if you would like to be added/removed from my taglist, just let me know :)

⌑ taglist: @siriuslysmoking @sheisjoeschateau @myeclispedsun @innercreationflower @juhdoche @frostandflamesfanfic

#steve harrington x henderson!reader #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #stranger things #steve harrington fanfic #stranger things rewrite #slowburn #angst #wdtai #m's writing #bless u steve and jonathan #both are a god damn MESS #anyways #PUNCH STEVE !!! #FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

[muthaz-rapapa]

Hirogaru Sky Final Impressions (5/5)

Honestly, what were they going to do with those two weeks after 48 episodes? Have us wait until WonPre's broadcast? Yea right, lol

So the 20th installment of Precure is now officially finished and it feels both great and a little bit sad to say that since the bar has been readjusted quite high, we will probably need the 25th anniversary to get another season as awesome and well-written as HiroPre. [/harsh]

But that will be for something to worry about in the next five years.

So first, that finale!

Pretty much 5(ish) of the 6 last episodes was a whole arc dedicated to the most engaging lore Precure has ever given us to date.

Cure Noble is definitely entering the league of legacy Cures and perhaps as the one with the best story as well. How she went from princess-sovereign to becoming the very first Precure (in this universe, anyways) to helping pave a way for peace with her nemesis to laying out the foundation for the Cures who will succeed her in the future.

Yeap, Ellee-chan may have gotten a nice age-up bonus so that we can see her embrace her destiny and actually converse in something other than baby talk.

But it's more accurate to say that Ellee-chan/Cure Majesty's character arc is really Princess Elleelain/Cure Noble's instead.

Which is totally fine with me. Not only was Elleelain super interesting as a hero/protagonist in her own era but Kaiserin was...dear god.

Dear god, when have we gotten a twist that was this good and this dark by the series' standards? I felt we haven't touched this level of grim writing since Heartcatch and that was my first Precure season ever.

But seriously, it's impossible not to sympathize with Kaiserin and appreciate how much she contributed to the plot as well as this season's message that power is not what makes a hero, but the strength of one's heart that does.

Even her traitorous tutor, Skearhead, said she had what it took to become a hero (and maybe even Precure? oooh~), which just makes her fall into darkness more tragic.

But thankfully, she never lost her kindness and compassion, which was what ultimately allowed her to not only be saved but her wounds to finally heal after hundreds of years of suffering from the pain of betrayal Skearhead had inflicted on her.

And that her generals, who all turned over a new leaf, came back to the Undergu Empire to loyally serve her and make sure she isn't alone...

Good! This is so satisfying, I couldn't have asked for anything better! Kaiserin deserves her happiness after all she's been through!

But of course, that's not all because no Precure finale is complete without the last episodes dishing out the best combat scenes of the entire season and did it deliver, alright.

Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-HUH!

The animation was absolutely stellar and not so overdone that it'd look more gaudy than cool. coughDeliPaPrecough

Moreover, the teamwork is what really sold the animation. As it should because Precure is all about that team effort brought on by personal growth, not a one-man show.

I loved how Wing, representing wisdom, was the one everyone trusted to get that barrier back up because it is a mechanism that he researched and developed to help everyone. It proves that boys don't need to fit into a specific mold of masculinity or genius to be a hero because in the end, those things don't matter. It's being true to yourself, your beliefs and your dreams and what you choose to do with those abilities that counts.

I loved how Butterfly, who is physically the strongest in the group, always takes on the tougher tasks such as facing the army of tedious mooks to let those younger than her forge a path ahead. She never forgets her responsibility as an adult to protect the kids but she also encourages them to move forward because she fully believes in them like a good adult would.

I loved how Majesty comes to understand that though she's meant to inherit Cure Noble's will and power and position as Skyland's princess, it's not her destiny to inherit Elleelain's loneliness. And the whole reason that she started out as a baby but was able to grow and become Precure was because she was surrounded by the right people who brought out that potential in her. For Ellee-chan, being with her friends and fighting alongside them was the bigger, more important destiny than her duty was.

Finally, the star duo of the show.

Sky was given stronger MC vibes than the other cast members but you can't deny that she wouldn't have gotten this far without Prism by her side.

Sora's idea of what it means to be hero expanded a lot because she became friends with Mashiro.

She has come to treasure Mashiro so much that when she was on the brink of losing her best friend, she let Skearhead corrupt her in order to have enough power to save that best friend. She was willing to sacrifice herself for someone important to her, which in a way, can be seen as an act of heroism (but only as a last resort, plz do not attempt).

And even then, Sky kept resisting from being taken over. Prism didn't even flinch when Sky aimed a punch at her. That's how much Mashiro believes in Sora, in the hero that Sora is. That even if Sora accepted darkness into herself to do the right thing, she won't ever let that darkness consume her into doing the wrong thing.

And the fact that it was Prism who had the ability to not only purify Sky but also heal Kaiserin's centuries-old wound. She's come a long way herself from the girl who used to think she was talentless, who didn't believe she had anything special going for her.

"You are good as you are now, Mashiro-san."

What Sora said was true until the very end. Mashiro didn't ever need to change. She was already good enough and she was always going to become even better than how she started out because she was always being inspired and supported by those around her and challenging herself to do things she initially hesitated on doing.

Now she's continually drawing new stories, even winning an award for one. Even her Prism Shot evolved and multiplied as an attack and it's all because she learned to believe in herself because all her friends believed in her.

This is essentially what sets Precure apart from the others, what makes it the major name it is in modern day mahou shoujo.

I cannot begin to describe how glad I am that the staff at Toei reinforced those aspects of friendship as well as the celebration of individualism in a milestone year. But I can definitely say with confidence that we can expect to see more well into the franchise's 30th anniversary as long they don't forget these two very crucial things.

As for me, I think this will be the last time I blog Precure on a "regular" basis.

I'll still continue to watch cuz hey, there's no reason for me to stop yet.

(and all the more reason to not stop if Satoru and Daifuku become the next two male Cures in WonPre OMGI'MSOGONNAJINXTHISAREN'TIBWUAHAHAHAHA!!!)

But my priorities have shifted so I gotta tend to those foremost. And as much as I enjoy the show, I feel like I'm always saying the same stuff over and over again anyway, just in different variations of it.

(also, something about WonPre tells me the next four years will be filled with hit-or-miss seasons so meh, I'd rather just follow it leisurely than get too invested and then disappointed)

On another note, I do have some personal rankings that I'd like to post some day. I was going to do it for the 20th anniversary but didn't have time to cuz life got way too hectic and busy but yea, eventually I'll have them up.

Just for fun, y'know.

Ok, that is all.

Thank you, my hero girls and boy! You made this season so wonderful hahahaha, good luck, WonPre for me and I can't be grateful enough for it.

Thank you for a beautiful anniversary! Let's aim for the next!

25th year with 100+ Precure!

Let's gooooooooooooo!!!

#hirogaru sky precure #cure sky #cure prism #cure wing #cure butterfly #cure majesty

[lesbehonestsstuff]

Chapter 10

Summary: Alex and Casey are called to the precinct where they find Olivia trying to get a little girl to open up.

I feel like this one needs a bit of explaining. I basically mixed episodes 16 and 20 from season 6. Alex got shot and went into witsec (I’ll write that one eventually) she came back because they caught Connors and Casey was attacked because of her relationship to Alex. It will make sense when you read it. I split this chapter into two and will post the second later.

Warnings: usual SVU things

Chapter 10/?

Olivia sat in the dark hospital room, Casey was sleeping, the pain meds having taken her out after Olivia spoke with her. Olivia tried to remain calm and calm Casey when she hadn’t remembered what had happened, knowing it was normal but it still left her deeply unsettled. The last few weeks, scratch that the last few months had been a complete shit show. All of it starting the night Alex died; well, she wasn’t dead, but only Olivia and Elliot knew that. They had promised Alex and the Marshalls they wouldn’t tell anyone, not even Casey, much to the detective's surprise as the marshals had insisted that it was to keep Casey and Niki safe. Alex had asked them, practically begged them, to look over her family, to take care of Casey, to not let her fall apart, and not let anything happen to her or to Niki. Of course, they had promised, and they had kept said promise, watching over them after Alex was gone.

Now Olivia looked at the beaten redhead in front of her and couldn't help but feel like she had broken that promise. She was so deep in thought she didn't notice the door opening and closing until a gasp followed by a broken sob broke the silence. Olivia turned her head so fast she almost got whiplash.

“Alex?” she whispered, unable to contain the shocked tone at seeing the blonde again.

Alex walked towards the bed, her eyes never leaving Casey. She reached out carefully, running the back of her hand over Casey's bruised cheek. Olivia watched as Alex's eyes flooded with tears until a few fell out. A minute must have passed, Olivia's mind still trying to comprehend how Alex was in front of her until Alex quite literally stood in front of her, anger running through her. “How could you let this happen?” she demanded, her voice breaking with emotion. “You promised me you were going to take care of her,” she took a deep breath, and Olivia could tell she was trying to compose herself.

Olivia ignored the questions and instead fired one of her own. “How are you here?”

Alex looked towards the door that was now blocked by what Olivia assumed were a couple of marshals. “One of the marshals let it slip that an ADA had been attacked, so Hammond told me what happened, and after that, he sure as hell wasn’t going to stop me from coming. Now answer me, what happened?” She was using the voice she reserved for when she dealt with criminals, and if Olivia didn't already understand why everyone was so intimidated by her, she sure as hell did now.

Olivia sighed, knowing there was really no beating around the bush now. “We’ve been dealing with four murders, the bullets matched your open homicide. Donnelly pulled Casey out of it the moment we figured out that whoever killed them also tried to kill you. We weren’t allowed to tell her, but you know how she is, she went digging and found out.” The squad had no idea how Casey had figured it out, but a day after they told her she couldn't keep on with the case, she had stormed into the precinct pissed at all of them for not telling her that they were looking into Alex’s murder.

Olivia sighed and continued when she saw Alex was waiting for her to go on. “Alex, she's been in really rough shape, and I guess she just lost it. She went into court the day of arraignment and started screaming at Connors until we got her out of the room. Thankfully, it was Judge Preston, and she let it slide. We tried to calm her down, but she screamed at us to leave her alone and went home after.”

Alex rubbed her hand over her face a couple of times. She knew Casey was going to fall apart; hell, if the roles were reversed, she would’ve lost her mind. “So how did she end up here?”

Olivia knew it was all still an ongoing investigation and they were still trying to piece everything together, but she also knew that she wasn’t going to be able to keep much from Alex. “We knew she had made herself a target the moment she stormed into that courtroom and screamed about him killing her wife. When the prosecution decided to charge Connors with your murder to be able to hold him, they must have figured that they could go after her to try to scare the DA’s office off the charges. I stayed with her because she insisted she needed to look into Connors while Elliot went to get Niki. I stepped out to get us coffee for five minutes, Alex, and when I came back, she was-”

Alex interrupted her, trying her hardest to not raise her voice and wake Casey up. “How could you leave her alone knowing she had a target on her back, Olivia?” She was fuming and pacing the room; it would do her no good to startle Casey, all things considered.

“Alex, we were in the DA’s office, in her office. There was no safer place for her to be,” Olivia reached out, trying to comfort her, but was quickly pushed back by the blonde.

Alex shook her head, her anger palpable. “Well, that clearly isn’t fucking true, look at her!” a sob bubbled up in her chest and broke free before she could stop it, Olivia taking the chance to try again, this time successfully wrapping Alex in a hug.

"Hey, shh," Olivia murmured, tightening her hold on Alex knowing the pressure would help ground her. "She's going to be okay."

Olivia kept holding her tightly, slowly rocking them back and forth. She couldn’t even begin to imagine what was going through Alex’s head. She felt her let out a shaky breath against her shoulder before she spoke again. “What did the doctors say?”

Olivia pulled back slightly, still holding Alex close to try to keep her calm. “She’s got a concussion, bruising, and a couple of broken ribs. They were worried about internal bleeding, but they cleared that. She doesn't remember the attack yet.”

“He didn’t…did he?” Alex asked her, and Olivia didn’t even need her to specify because she’s been working this job long enough to know what Alex meant.

She gave Alex another squeeze. “No, honey, I talked to the nurses, and it was cleared,” she reassured her, giving her a small kiss on the side of her head.

Olivia could see the relief flood Alex’s features. “Thank God,” another wave of sobs made their way through the silence in the room, and Olivia would be lying if she said it didn’t freak her out slightly to see Alex so distraught. She doesn’t think she’s ever seen her cry that much, and it was breaking her heart.

“Liv, how am I supposed to explain this? She thinks I’m dead; my daughter thinks I’m dead,” this subject was one that had kept Alex awake for so many nights in the past months. Her anxiety at an all-time high over how her wife and child would react to finding out she was alive. She knew that she was in an impossible situation and that Casey might even hate her for this. This definitely wasn’t how she had wanted to come back, adding to the pain and trauma, both physical and psychological, that her wife was dealing with by having her come back to life wasn’t ideal, but Alex couldn’t stay away. She just hoped Casey would understand.

“There was nothing you could do, Alex, you had to protect them,” Olivia rubbed her back, trying to keep Alex from getting more distressed.

Alex let out a humorless laugh. “Yeah, look at how well that turned out,” she pulled back from Olivia’s arms, wiping her hands below her eyes to get rid of the last of her tears, taking a deep breath, and schooling her features. “I want him charged with my attempted murder and her assault.”

Olivia’s brow furrowed with concern at the implication of Alex’s words. “Honey, that would mean you’d have to leave witness protection,” she tried to reason, not sure it was the best idea considering what was happening. “We already have him for the four murders.”

Alex shook her head and started to pace the room once more. “I don’t care, if I can help get him convicted, I may have a shot at staying. Besides, if they find out I’m alive, it will only fuel the defense to push for perjury charges.”

“Alright, I’ll talk to Abbie, see what she thinks,” Olivia nodded, already trying to figure out how she was going to tell Abbie that Alex was alive and that they had perjured themselves when they arrested Connors.

The mention of Abbie Carmichael seemed to catch Alex off guard; they hadn’t seen each other for so long she wasn’t even sure Abbie was still in New York. “Carmichael is back?”

A faint smile tugged at Olivia’s face at Alex’s disbelief. “You really think Donnelly was going to let a random ADA handle this? You two are like family to her; she basically speed-dialed Abbie when Casey was taken off the case.”

Alex paced across the room for a little while, seemingly calmer now that she knew Abbie was the one handling the case. She finally pulled up a chair and sat next to Casey, very gently holding her hand, careful not to disturb the cables and wires that ran around her.

“How has she been doing? How’s Niki?” Alex's voice was soft, mindful that she was now closer to Casey, her eyes never leaving her as she asked Olivia for updates on her girls.

Olivia took a moment to gather her thoughts before responding, searching for a way she could tell Alex things that she was sure were only going to break her further. “Niki has been quiet. I don’t think she fully understood what was happening. She has lashed out at Casey a few times, but after, she just seems to go back into herself. After the funeral, she kept asking Casey when you were coming back. We’ve been taking turns taking care of her, making sure she’s with one of us whenever Casey is working.”

A heavy silence hung in the air as Alex absorbed the news, her expression a mixture of sadness and guilt. She knew the toll her death was going to take, and yet, she couldn't shake the feeling of helplessness that was trying to consume her, the nagging thought that she had failed them in some irreparable way.

“Casey, she's not doing great.” Her voice was soft, as if it was aware of how easily it could cut through Alex. “I'm going to be brutally honest with you; if it wasn’t for Niki, I don't think she would be here. Donnelly gave her a month's leave, and she was just going through the motions for Niki. She was almost catatonic during that time, and now she just throws herself into cases until she’s almost drowning in them.”

The weight of Alex's guilt seemed to multiply the more Olivia spoke as she grappled with the enormity of the situation and how much her wife had suffered because of her. “This is a whole fucking mess; what am I supposed to do?” she exclaimed, the frustration at being in this situation clear in her voice.

Olivia reached out, her hand coming to rest on Alex's shoulder in a gesture of comfort. “You tell her the truth, tell her it was the only way to keep them safe and that you didn’t have a choice. She’ll understand.”

Alex's frustration boiled over, her anger directed inward as she berated herself for the decisions that had led them to this point. "I hate Hammond, I hate Connors, fuck, I hate myself for not listening and dropping the case," she confessed, thinking about how Casey had supported her as she kept working the case but practically begged her the night they blew up the car and the agent with it to let someone else handle it. She was too stubborn and too determined to listen, and that set all of this in motion.

“You were just doing your job, Alex,” Olivia tried to reassure her, seemingly aware of how much Alex was berating herself in that moment.

“Yeah, and it cost me nearly eight months of my life with my wife and our daughter,” Alex whispered, defeated by the weight of regret that had clung to her since the night she had to leave.

Olivia didn’t have an answer for that; she could only imagine how hard all of this was for them. When Casey shifted a little in her sleep, she got Alex’s attention again, knowing the redhead was going to wake up soon. “Do you want me to stay or do you want to be alone with her?”

Alex shook her head and rubbed her thumb over Casey’s hand. “Please stay; I don’t know how she’s going to react to seeing her wife back from the dead.”

Olivia pulled up another chair and settled in beside Alex, wrapping one of her arms around Alex and letting her lean her head against her shoulder. “Okay, honey, I’ll stay.”

#alex cabot #casey novak #calex #casey novak x alex cabot #law and order svu #olivia benson #all aboard the angst train

[sgiandubh]

Jottings: Season 7, episode 6. A woman is... possibility

Contrary to what I usually do in here, just jotting down spontaneous impressions of the episodes, with no great pretension to anything, I had to re-watch Where The Waters Meet three times over last week. And it was all my fault, because this is truly a good and dense episode, that could have very well ended this half-season.

It also becomes more and more clear that my decision of not reading these damn books was a very poor choice. Probably because the storyline seems cramped, at times, I find myself gliding through moments and scenes with the very unpalatable sensation of bagging a munro without the right equipment. Not a good picture, I know. But bear in mind I just started Drums of Autumn and it already reads like a root canal intervention - sorry for the book purists. I should, however, hope to somehow catch up before part B of the season: no promises, though. If, by any stretch of my vivid imagination, I start to hear Herself's screechy voice in my head while reading, it immediately goes down the drain, despite my best intentions & effort.

But I digress. While Fort Ticonderoga is being evacuated with the help of the friendly Cherokees and their lightweight canoes, in Lallybroch there is a bit of fussing over Jemmy's cursing in Gaelic at school. Which leads to Roger being invited to give a wee lecture on the topic by a very enthusiastic Headmaster and yet another (Lord in heaven and all His cherubs) constipated domestic conversation with SS. The only cheerful thing about her is that self-assertive fringe, so 80s I could cry (I hate the Eighties with the passion I worship the Sixties, heh). And her grabbing me by the sleeve (Hello, people! Lookie here! I can haz acting! I am acting! ) every single time she has more than three lines on air is distracting and, again, annoying.

Walter Woodcock's demise instantly took me to Season 1, when that proud Scot was killed by the boar and Claire helped give him the good death he deserved. Not surprising at all, since the whole OL dynamic is a pendulum between loves, timelines and worlds.

The new Rollo dog looks less direwolfish than Rollo 1. #GoT, stopped watching upon Khaleesi's arrival at King's Landing. Never looked back.

Rob Cameron, you antagonist, you. That new acquaintance you instantly find too pushy not to feel suspicious about, and yet you can't afford to be irrationally rude to. Also, with no SS in sight, RR is pulling off his scenes quite fine & dandy, and with ease. What is that woman's dark secret? How can that be? Court is still in session, on this one. But give me more Hunters and less #Broger, dear God. I would take it any day, any way you see fit. I will be nice to everyone and take my vitamins. I will even consider jogging. But get them off my back, for Christ's sake!

Vandervaart. Consistent. Present. Owns his game. Elegant. Loved every single moment (Your servant, Madam - especially and for obvious reasons). A very, very good cast honoring both J and LJG. I can only fawn and paeans are not really my specialty. But I continue to be impressed and confident and I see great things for this talented kid.

Spoiler: I said yes, Claire. And just like that, with the click of the rifle's hammer, he tells her their whole world is yet again thrown upside down. Theirs is a dense scene, clearly dominated by S, whose mastery of voice and expression is once again flawless and thoroughly appreciated. She follows, at a - by now - completely symbiotic pace, but make no mistake: he gives her the cues. And I would take that subtle, unspeakable tenderness any day, gladly, if the writer's final choice was not to insist on what might be - perhaps unjustly - construed by some as geriatric porn. He still looks at her like that.

For that only, if not for all the rest, I will continue to watch it until the end. Because I feel you morally lose the right to criticize the moment you throw the towel and your opinion suddenly turns into bitching. Something I will most probably never do, as far as OL is concerned.

Onwards to Dreaded Seven. Let's see if I can be properly disgusted by poor acting yet again.

Credit given to @flllk. B&W is a great idea - the right kind of depth

#jottings

[ankhmutes]

We Love You, 1952 : M*A*S*H*

I was watching MASH and on Tumblr, aimlessly scrolling when a mutual somewhere posted something about this episode, and I posted something, and I figured I should actually WRITE something instead of babble about it. SO I did a thing. It took me a couple weeks with some last minute help from the amazing @caffiene-fueled-fuckery without this person I doubt this would have turned out as lovely as it is.

and some nice art too, I got inspired (ish) it's not my best work but I kind of like it.

No warnings, really, just mentions of war. Faint allusions of shipping Hawkeye with a variety of people, so I guess if you squint, Hawkeye could be shipped with anyone but I do fly the flag of Hawkcahy quite high.

The theme music filled the air as hundreds of thousands of households gathered in front of the television. In Eight houses, however, there was an extra air of anticipation. The station had hinted that a MASH unit was going to be interviewed, and all those households had their fingers crossed for it to be 4077th. The chatter in every house hushed, until the voice of Clete Roberts filled the room.

“Good evening. This is Korea, October 9, 1952. I’m Clete Roberts, and I am speaking to you from the recovery room of the mobile Surgical hospital, A MASH.”

Eyes moved from Clete, scanning the background for anything familiar. No one recognized any person, only bodies of nurses flitting around in the background, and drab surroundings. Clete’s voice echoed through eight households, and hearts skipped beats as he continued to speak. 

 “The fighting began out here two years ago, and in spite of the ongoing peace talks, an end seems nowhere in sight.  This isn’t the first time we’ve been to this particular unit, but we’ve returned because of its record of efficiency, and the people who make that record are a truly unique story.

“Doctor? Could I bother you for a second? “

“Sure, set up a tray and I’ll remove the sutures, okay?”  A stoop-shouldered doctor spoke, his dark hair glinting in the light and his heavy-lidded eyes ringed with dark circles. In Maine, an older man inhaled sharply, nearly choking on his cider. It had been years since he had laid eyes on his son, and the boy was before him. He saw the little boy in the tired, haggard doctor as the name flashed on the screen. 

Capt. B.F. Pierce 

Surgeon

Daniel chuckled as he saw his son slip the stethoscope in his pocket, knowing the boy wasn’t quite paying attention. He drank his cider slowly, savoring the sound of his boy’s voice.

“As a Practicing surgeon, how do you cope with these  Unusual circumstances?” Clete spoke in his strong voice. Daniel leaned closer, his eyes unflinching as he heard his son speak. 

“Well, usually I just, uh, turn my mind off and hope it’ll all go away.” Daniel let out a long sigh, watching Hakweye gaze off into the distance. He knew those rough times, especially after his wife had died which made Hawkeye retreat into himself. “That, uh, doesn’t uh, seem to work, though, so most times you just, uh…” the man shrugs, “do your job and try to forget that there’s a war going on outside the window.”

Somewhere in Hannibal, Missouri, a steel-eyed and silver-haired woman smiled gently as the camera changed from the sad-eyed boy she had read about in numerous letters, to the face she had cherished for over forty years. Her Sherman. Her heart fluttered as she saw the words on the screen, floating under her husband’s tired, tired face. She knew that face, it was the face she had seen on numerous sleepless nights, when one of the children wouldn’t go to bed, or one of those nights where he had an ornery patient. It was a face she knew that wouldn’t go away for a long while. She could see the pride in his eyes. 

COL. SHERMAN POTTER

Commanding Officer

The slim man shook his head tiredly, and Mildred put her hand over her heart, almost an echo of her husband’s visage as she listened to his voice soothing her tired heart

.

“I’ve seen the casualty reports, and the number of wounded men that pass through here is staggering.” Clete sat across from Sherman, leaning forward in concentration. Mildred smiled with gentle sadness, knowing what her husband’s reply would be, she had heard him answer that question countless times, and his letters showed his frustration with the sheer volume of patients that had gone through their camp. 

“Yeah, we’ve got enough clientele here to open a hospital.” Mildred smiled as Sherman fiddled with the nameplate, recognizing the discomfort; not with the question, but with the situation. “Makes for some long sessions in O.R. I’ve seen surgeons so tired they almost fell asleep on their patients.”  Mildred leaned back in her chair, pulling a quilt closer to her as if she could feel Sherman in the chair near her, but his blanket still lay neatly folded in the seat. Her attention returned to the screen, now showing a young man that brought a bright smile to her face, recalling her husband’s latest letter inquiring about some patterns to be sent to– 

CPL. M. KLINGER

Corpsman

Arabic chatter immediately quieted, as many sets of eyes were glued on the TV, the sizzling smell of sausages mingling with strong onions and the sweetness of cardamom in the air. Abdul leaned against his sister, whispering in her ear and translating the English, but everyone knew the Klinger name. It was no doubt their loved one, Max, on the screen, everyone relishing his beaming countenance. 

“What’s your most difficult problem here?”  Clete leaned over to Max, who was holding on to a broom, shifting slightly as he spoke, Abdul pausing to let his sister hear her son’s voice, knowing she could sense more than just words, through his voice and facial expression. 

“Well, uh, for me, the toughest is getting used to doing things the army way.” Laughter broke out among the Klingers, light chatter and swatches of fabric being tossed around. “You see, back home in Toledo, when we needed something, we just stole it—-borrowed it.” Abdul shook his head and laughed, as his sister wept and put her hand on the TV, cradling her son’s face through the screen. 

The Grange hall in Iowa erupted with excitement and shushing, as the bespectacled young man appeared on screen, some flashes erupting through the hall as people took photos of the TV set with the name on the screen. 

CPL W. O’REILLY

Company Clerk

Uncle Ed beamed with pride, holding his sister close to him as she wept openly into a plaid handkerchief. A girl in a blue gingham dress hollered with excitement, shoving a boy next to her for a place right in front of the TV, leaning in close to hear. 

“You know, back in Iowa, if you wanted somethin’ all you had to do was ask for it.” The crowd all nodded in approval. “But, I mean, wow. Over here, they got, uh, paperwork and requisitions for everything.” Grumbles broke out among the older men, reminiscing about their own experiences in the service during one of the Great Wars. Shushes filled the room as the screen changed.

Daniel Pierce chuckled as he put down his glass, putting aside his plate and tray as he leaned back in his easy chair to listen some more, his eyes immediately latching on to the lean frame of his son as he leaned on a desk in a recovery ward. Daniel recognized the kind of room, and smiled as he listened to the younger man speak. In his mind’s eye, he saw the toothy smile of Hawkeye’s, dressed in his own medical coat, trying to give the cat a medical exam.

“What do you miss the most?” Daniel wanted to swat the microphone out of the reporter’s face, but chose to sigh and lean forward, his hands on his bony knees. 

“Well, just offhand I’d say, uh, uh,” Daniel frowned, he knew his son must be exhausted, but this was a new reach. “A mattress thicker than a matzo…”  Daniel snorted in amusement, his smile mirroring his own son’s. “...my own bathroom with a combination lock… any woman out of any uniform.. “ Daniel rolled his eyes and smirked. “...and the entire state of maine.” 

‘I miss you too, son,’ Daniel mouthed quietly as the old man who was Hawkeye’s superior appeared on screen. Daniel was grateful for a man like Sherman Potter. Hawk really needed someone to keep him in line, and Sherman didn’t seem one to take too much crap, but still give him enough room to cause chaos without hurting anyone. Too much. 

Mildred remained curled up in her seat, her eyes fastened on the screen with intense concentration once Sherman came on again, burying her face in his blanket. She could swear she still smelled his aftershave. 

“Well, I miss playing spoons with my wife.”

“Playing spoons? I don’t understand.”  Mildred giggled loudly, blushing and feeling like a schoolgirl all over again. “You mean music?”

“No.” Sherman smiled, his hands moving up slightly. “You cuddle up together like two spoons in a drawer.” Mildred rolled her eyes ever so slightly, moving forward to get to her cup of tea. “Wait a minute. That’s a little personal. Maybe you shouldn’t use it.”  Mildred put down her tea cup and put her hand to her lips, almost in consternation of Sherman’s sudden formality. She could see he was anxious, and most likely missing her. She just took more sips of her tea, her eyes drinking in every nuance of her husband. 

“Whatever you say.” 

“Aw, what the hell.  I’m sure there are plenty of people back home who do the same thing.” 

Mildred sighed as her tea cup clinked softly and she shook her head in unison, copying Sherman. She smiled as she saw the next face, the young man so youthful and sweet-looking.

Angelica shouted at the other girls to shush–her brother was on TV. She could finally see him after so long, and he looked much too skinny. She had to wonder what they were serving him over there as she shoved Martha Margaret out of her seat, almost tripping over Ruth and Naomi who were sprawled out on the floor. Angelica grinned as she saw her brother’s smile and his name flash on the screen. 

1ST. LT. F.  MULCAHY 

Chaplain

“Father, what do you miss the most?” 

Angelica watched her brother smile in his coffee cup, holding it just like their mother did. He looked too casual in his black T-shirt, but she was pleased he still wore his crucifix that she had given him before he left for Korea.

“He mustn't miss much over here, huh?” Jude asked, leaning over the back of the creaky couch. Angelica swatted him away ferociously, while the younger girls shouted at the young priest to sit down in a huff.

 “Well, let’s see. I think a chapel that didn’t double as a mess tent. You see, I’m very fond of stained glass.”

“Yeah, the amount of glass windows he broke playing baseball as a boy. Da whipped his butt raw.” Angelica snickered as she leaned back, surrounded by her girls, the novicates who were the nuns-in training and the priest, to watch what her brother was writing home about. The smirk fading to a frown, she wondered if perhaps it would shed further light on his cryptic letters home. 

Mrs. O’Reilly sighed with a smile as she saw her son. “What do I miss the most? My very own room.” She laughed as she nudged her brother, knowing that Walter never quite had his own room, he always had to share it with the animals he ended up bringing home. 

“You’ll have to excuse my appearance, my hair hasn't seen a beauty parlor since Tokyo…Oh, thank you.” Margaret smiled, and Margaret’s parents smiled at the sight of their daughter. “What was the question?” 

MAJ. M. HOULIHAN

Head Nurse

“What do you miss the most around here?”

“Around here? Well, frankly, I’d have to say a sense of order and discipline.” Margaret’s father nodded and shook his fist in the air in agreement, as Margaret’s mother huffed and smirked. She was just content to see her daughter looked all right, even if just a tad frustrated…

Screaming and hollering rang through the air as Peg called over her friends, her arms wrapped around her little girl, Erin, pointing to the TV. “That’s Daddy! See, your daddy’s on TV!” She nearly swooned as she saw her husband’s name come on the TV. 

CAPT. B.J. HUNNICUTT

Surgeon 

“Well, one thing I miss is my wife’s cooking.” Peg shrieked with delight and giggled, as Erin reached out to the TV, her eyes moving from the photo on the TV of BJ and Peg, then the TV. “What am I saying? Anybody’s cooking.” Peg giggled and cuddled her daughter, asking if she saw her Daddy, and kissed Erin’s chubby cheeks, wishing her husband was home already. She didn't even mind that mustache he had grown, and how long his hair had grown. She just wanted him home. 

Everyone grumbled as the Truman clips rolled, wanting to see their loved ones some more, and beverages were refilled. Diapers changed, and animals fed until the sound of Clete’s voice brought them all back to their respective seats in front of the TV. 

Angelica shouted with delight as she pointed out her brother in the background, behind Clete, sipping his coffee peacefully. People milled around Clete, and Angelica’s eyes watched her brother with a pang of sadness, realizing how alone he really could be, surrounded by all these people.. An island unto himself, thought Angelica as she held a pillow closer to her body, whispering at Jude to shut up so she could hear the TV. 

War, like politics, makes strange bedfellows. The 4077th is a highly diverse, if not disparate group of people. And yet the war seems to have molded them into a family….. Each family member watching the special nodded almost as if in unison to Clete’s words. Their faces reflected the happiness that they held for their loved one and their companions, now able to recognize and put a face to the names they read about so frequently in the letters and heard about in phone calls, oftentimes in the background, a strange tinny sound from so far, far away. 

Mildred smiled softly at her husband’s words, knowing he meant every word dearly. 

“I would say, all things considered, and without overstating it, they’re just about– they’re just about– No, forget “just about” They’re the best bunch of people I’ve ever worked with in my entire life.” Each family member beamed with pride at the words from Colonel Potter.

“When you share the horror that we do day in and day out…” BJ shook his head. “You don’t just feel close, you cling to each other.” Peg frowned and held her daughter closer to her, almost afraid to wonder what horrors her husband dreamt of at night. She hoped he would dream of pretty things, such as the time they took Erin to the beach, or when they bought their house… but Peg found herself making a promise to hold onto BJ for however long he needed it when he returned. She would try to make home a safe place again…

“I hate the damn army, but I love these people.” Abdul translated for his sister, their smiles matching Max’s, so grateful he had found such wonderful friends. The section 8 had become much less of a concern, and Max’s mother found herself murmuring to Abudl that he had grown into such a wonderful young man, as she gestured to the screen, the warm scent of tobacco filling the air. 

The people gathered in the Grange Hall in Iowa leaned towards each other, giving each other comfort throughout the narrative, until Radar’s face came on screen.  “The way people come and go around here. You know, you just get to know one person, and he leaves, and then there’s another person.”  Ed whispered to his sister, wondering what had made Walter so cynical. Most likely that CO, they had before- what was his name? Henry Blake? Ed recalled his sister had made a cake to send to that poor family in Illinois. 

Margaret’s parents chuckled at their daughter’s words, holding up their respective cups of scotch and sparkling bubbly water. “Well, you have to understand, I’m regular army. Most of them are not. They’re a terribly unruly and undisciplined bunch, and I thank god for each and every one of them when those casualties roll in.” 

Both of her parents smiled, saying in unison, “That’s our Margaret.”

Daniel Pierce smiled–he knew his son more than his son knew himself. He could see the honesty and shadow of denial in the young man’s eyes. “You get close to everybody in a place like this. Some more than others, of course. Uh, my bunkmate for instance, B. J. Hunnicutt. Uh, clean cut, family man, even temperament. In spite of that, I really like the guy. “ B.J. seemed more than a friend, more like a close comfort. And what was that of the Mulcahy fellow he heard about in every letter? That nice young man had dominated a number of letters home, Daniel thought with a fond smile as the young man’s face filled the screen.

Angelica’s fellow nuns nudged her, asking how come her brother looked so sweet, but was such a devil when he was a boy? Angelica laughed and shook her head, telling them she had gotten her revenge on him when she had bitten his toe. 

“And then, of course, There’s Major Winchester, our newest arrival.” Angelica could tell her brother wasn’t too thrilled with Major Winchester–he had his I must not tell lies face on.. “Someone should say something nice about him. Uh… H-He’s a very good doctor.” Angelica could read into her brother’s words, recalling their mother muttering under her breath at the grocery clerk a few choice words in an almost-forgotten Irish Gaelic as she smiled the same smile that her son had put on, and Angelica was echoing a similar smile.

MAJ. C.E. WINCHESTER

Surgeon 

Charles’s family murmured in delight and acknowledgement as soon as Charles filled the screen, his name bringing pride to the patriarch. 

“Tell me something about the people here.”  Honoria laughed from her position on the settee, nearly tipping her cup of tea. Mother scolded Honoria, while Father’s eyes darted askance, with a half-smirk on his lips in his wife’s direction. 

“No, I don’t want to get into personalities, uh, here.” Honoria giggled again, this time earning a mild half-hearted flutter that couldn’t be called a swat, in her direction. “However, there are some people that I will try very hard to forget. Of course, I know I never shall. One in particular who is, you might say, well, let’s start with immature, self-righteous, arrogant, everything I abhor. For the record, the only thing that makes him marginally acceptable is his skill as a surgeon. Of course, even in there his conduct is insufferable.”  Honoria asked her mother and father which one Charles was talking about, since there were so many people he complained about, and they all started debating, since there was no way any of those people they had heard about on the TV matched Charles’s ramblings. Honoria knew better, smirking at the TV as she feigned interest in her parents’ debate. She knew her brother could be fancying someone, possibly one of the roommates, she just couldn’t see Charles paired with any of the nurses–he never mentioned them…. 

Daniel hollered with laughter, slapping his knee. “Our head nurse is really something. Uh, Major Houlihan. Margaret. Did I mention she’s really something?” He knew his son would admire a woman just like his own mother, but he was vaguely sure his son liked both Margaret and a certain fellow….

The commercials filled the air.  People got up to refresh drinks, fill plates, and use the restroom in a hurry. Chatter filled the air, asking questions about ‘the others’- They were used to hearing about BJ, Charles, Francis, Sherman, Max, Margaret– but they never had heard about the other people around that particular loved one. Daniel hummed and wondered to himself about That nice young man Francis, and the roommate B.J.-- what exactly did that name stand for? Charles’s family discussed the merits of Charles’s roommates and the head nurse, Margaret–surely she would be suited for Charles–while Honoria rolled her eyes and perused her brother’s records. Peg sipped coffee and rocked a sleepy Erin, not wanting to put down her baby, her only physical extension of BJ. 

The air hushed as Clete came on the TV, his voice strong and filling the sudden void. 

This is just the beginning of autumn in Korea, and there’s already a real chill in the air. Before winter even arrives, the temperatures will dip below zero, and all that after a summer of unbearable heat. If you were going to hold a war, this is probably the most brutal climate on Earth in which to do it. 

“You’re five miles from the front on call 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and the O.R. Sessions must be a source of great tension. What do you do to relax?”  

“Relax?”

“You get a chance to relax, don’t you?”

“To relax, I like to stay in shape, so I drink a lot. That’s uh.. That’s the really big sport here.” Daniel frowned and glanced at his own bottles, resting on top of the record player. He knew Hawkeye had been exposed to some heavy drinking, particularly around the time of his wife’s death, but Hawkeye's flippancy unnerved him mildly. He knew of the still in his son’s tent, but he was slightly nervous about how exactly his son would drink away his terrors… he didn’t want Ben to end up like his Uncle Archie, now would he…  

Jude poked Angelica, who startled and turned towards the TV, blankets and pillows flying everywhere as nuns fought for a good spot to see Angelica’s handsome brother. 

“Poker. I know that may sound very strange, but poker relaxes me.”  Angelica shouted in indignation, Francis had taken every red cent from her and their other siblings when they played poker as children. “There’s nothing more satisfying than shearing the flock, as it were.” Angelica knew that smile– her brother was breaking rules again. “Of course, it all goes to the orphans. Well, almost all of it.” She knew of the customary tax, as it were–seventy-five percent went to Francis’s cause, and then twenty-five would go to Francis himself. Sometimes he called it a ‘finder’s fee’- Angelica called it a ‘fleecer’s fee.’

Honoria hollered at her parents, suddenly unladylike, as her brother’s visage filled the screen. Her parents paused to scold her, waiting until after Charles had made his appearance. 

“Music is my sanctuary–classical. It reminds me that there is still some grace and culture left in the world.”  Honoria rolled her eyes as her parents called her ‘unladylike’ and ‘unseemly for a young woman of your station, they don’t holler.’

Peg giggled and snuggled Erin, who gave a milk-drunk gurgle of contentment, baby snores wafting from the not-quite-baby, not quite-toddler in Peg’s arms. “Oh, in general, I’d say with a lot of horseplay–taking out your frustrations on other people.” Peg scoffed, knowing her husband and his practical jokes. “You know, good, clean, American fun.” She still hadn’t gotten the ink out of that dress, the victim of the last practical joke he had played on her right before he had left for Korea… But right now, she didn’t mind it one bit. It helped her smile, remembering her BJ. 

Daniel Pierce rolled his eyes and cleaned up his drinks, knowing his son was definitely one of those people.. “I don’t want to lie to you. I’ve established some wonderful temporary relationships with a lot of the nurses here. I like to think of myself as a social director of the heart.”  Social director, indeed, Daniel recalled the numerous phone calls he had gotten for ‘Ben’ or ‘Benji’ or ‘Benjamin’--his favorite was of a nervous young man, right before Hawkeye had left for Korea- asking for ‘Benny-” 

LATEST NEWS FROM THE KOREAN FRONT: MOVIETONE NEWS

“How has being a part of all this, the war, changed you?”  As Clete asked each person, each family held their breath, half-waiting to hear what their loved one would say. Letters and phone calls were one thing, but it was something else to actually see their loved one say the words….

“Very impressed now, with the…” Daniel watched Clete tower over Hawkeye at the desk, presumably in the recovery ward. “...terrible fragility of the human body and the uh…” Daniel let out a sharp breath, realizing what Hawkeye’s next word would be, “the unbelievable resiliency of the human spirit.” He could see in his mind’s eye the last time he had kissed his wife good-night, and the last time his wife had kissed their son good-night. He was fairly certain it was the same image Hawkeye was seeing. 

Peg shivered, suddenly feeling a cold shiver of ice shoot through her as she watched the cold ice shoot over her husband’s visage, not wanting to see that look in his eye again. “And it’s made me…” Peg bit her lip, unable to tear her eyes away from BJ, red lipstick smearing her teeth. “Very, very angry.” 

Honoria glanced askance at her parents, sitting stiffly and formally in their chairs. “It’s allowed me to work fairly closely without becoming contaminated with people of vastly divergent points of view.” Honoria smirked as she looked up from the record-sorting, seeing the truth of his words in her brother’s eyes, and the flicker of distaste in her parents’ eyes. 

“I’ve learned more about myself and how much I really care about people. Um, I feel as old as I’m ever going to get.” Margaret’s mother smiled, her smile a match to Margaret’s own. “Older than I ever intended to be. And I… really can’t wait to go home.” Both parents let out small sighs of relief and agreement, wanting their daughter back safe. 

“When this is over, when there’s no more reason for you to be here, what memories will you take home with you?”

“That’s easy. The face of every kid who’s come through here.” Daniel nodded and held up his coffee mug to his son’s words, he knew the feeling all too well from his own experience in 1917. He still couldn’t forget the haunted faces of the soldiers he had seen from the Ardennes.

“But there must be other things you will recall.”  Daniel mouthed, ‘good luck.’ Hawkeye was always a mauldin child, oscillating wildly from one extreme to another, in-between a mere suggestion. 

“I don’t know. I don’t think that you remember the bad stuff as much as you think you will. I think uh, I think I’ll never forget the day I go home. At the moment, I can’t imagine it.” Daniel took a swig of his coffee, allowing it to burn his throat on the way down, he needed the distraction from the pang of fear he felt for his son. 

Honoria’s eyes snapped up at the moment she heard her brother’s voice, and her eyes widened. 

“No memories. I blot it out as it happens.” Honoria shivered, recalling their younger brother and the vacant look she had seen in her brother’s eyes. 

Margaret’s parents smiled fondly at their daughter. “The people here at MASH. They’re like family. No, they are family. Yes. Family.” It was hard to forget the cherished relationships between people who shared quite an adventure. 

Angelica shook her head at her brother, rolling her eyes at the ceiling, knowing he was a sucker for those little fellows, never wanting anyone to go without a parent’s love. “The little Korean children. Their smiles amidst all this despair.” Angelica remembered their mother, fondly feeding the neighborhood children pies, saving scraps for the less fortunate, and practically giving away everything she’d knit to others less fortunate. Bless his soul, Francis had inherited their mother’s gentle nature, and their father’s fierce streak. 

Abdul echoed Max’s words, nodding with emphasis and smiling as the dark-eyed Klingers all nodded in agreement, feeling Max’s warmth emanating from his smile, and understanding that there was happiness to be found… “All the good times. That’s what I’ll remember. I think there were three.”  Abdul knew that was one of the many reasons he kept sending Max all these dresses.. Someone needed a smile out there, and seeing an hairy middle-eastern man in a dress could make anyone forget the horror surrounding them even for a moment. 

Mildred smiled fondly, curling up further in her blanket, letting the steam from her tea warm her face, sipping as she watched Sherman on TV. “What these young people have–their dedication, their devotion, almost, their high spirits–has rubbed off on me. I feel ten years younger. I’m a better doctor, and most important…” Mildred couldn’t stop smiling–it was her husband on TV, and she could hear his voice as if he was right next to her. “I’m a better human being and I don’t have to remember that. It’s part of me.” She knew the man spoke gospel truth, Sherman was one of those rare men that were willing to be flexible, to learn from others, and shed his old skin every once in a while. She wouldn't have stayed with him all these years if he had still remained as stern and unyielding as he had been in their youth.

The people in the Grange Hall had left, the novelty of the programme wearing off, but Radar’s family had remained. They huddled around the television, their blankets wrapped around their shoulders and smiles on their faces as they watched Walter on the tv, relishing the sound of his voice. “One day. One very bad day.” Radar’s mother could recall that very day. “There’s people here that suffer every day. And, uh… I don’t really want to talk about this.” She knew the pain, having lost her husband and knowing the pain of watching peoples’ suffering. 

Angelica blinked at the sudden change, taking in her brother’s tent, she knew it was his tent, from the desk in the background. Only Francis would drag all those books all the way to Korea and play poker with the boys, turning around and giving the winnings to the little children. 

“When the doctors cut into a patient, and it’s cold, you know, the way it is now today…” Angelica remembered bundling up with Francis to run outside in the cold and was unnerved that something could be colder than Philadelphia in winter.  “Steam rises from the body.”  Whispers broke out around Angelica. “And the doctor will– will warm himself over the open wound. Could anyone look on that and not feel changed?” Jude whispered to Angelica, realizing now how and why Francis was such a good priest–‘he’s got a way with words, hasn’t he?’  – Angelica nodded as the image jerked slightly, her brother suddenly putting his spectacles back on. She could see the glimmer of tears still in his eyes, and the breath left Angelica’s body, for a split-second she could feel her soul leave her body and cry out at the injustice her brother was witnessing every day. Her lips parted and she merely nodded to Jude, the pain too sharp for words.

There’s no way to summarize what you’ve just seen and heard, save to say that, God willing, all these exceptional people will be going home one day. Let us hope that neither they nor any others will have to assemble for such a purpose again. Good night. 

The TV clicked off. Each person drifted off in their own thoughts, finishing up their nightly routines with the spectre of their loved one next to them. Daniel locked the doors, turned out the lights, and curled up in his large bed, holding on to his wife’s pillow. Mildred washed up the dishes, listening to a recording of her and Sherman’s favorite song, humming along as she danced herself to bed. She brushed off Sherman’s half of the bed before kissing his photo and turning in for the night, composing her next letter to him in her head as she drifted off in a peaceful sleep. Abdul and Mrs. Klinger got the little ones ready for bed, chattering among themselves in Arabic, debating what outfit they should send to Max next. Margaret’s parents each laid in their own beds, in their separate households, sharing the same thought of how much they loved their daughter and how lucky they were to have her in their lives. Angelica herded all of the novice  nuns to their dormitory, taking a moment to make sure Jude would behave, before locking herself into her room. She crossed herself, taking off her habit and wimple, messy dark blond hair falling about her in wild curls as she brushed through her hair. She sang to herself a childhood song she used to sing with Francis, half-praying for her brother and his companions in the 4077. Honoria sorted the records, making her way to her bedroom and falling asleep to the sound of her brother’s favorite record, putting up with the caterwauling just so she could pretend he was down the hall, being a brat and torturing her with the music. Peg had laid Erin down for the night, and was curled up in bed, wearing BJ’s pajamas. She inhaled his aftershave and talked to BJ as if he was lying next to her in the bed, the small charade allowing her to drift off to sleep.

On the other side of the world, In Korea, it was chaos. Blood painted the OR red and people glanced up for a moment, eyes on a clock. 

“It’s bedtime back home.”

Murmurs about what their loved ones may be doing at that very moment drifted about, not knowing that every thought was about them, love from afar surrounding every soul in the 4077.

#mash 4077 #mashblr #mash fandom #m*a*s*h 4077 #if you squint you can ship hawkeye with anyone #colonel potter #father mulcahy #john mulcahy #hawkeye pierce #bj hunnicutt #charles emerson winchester iii #margaret houlihan #maxwell klinger #sherman potter #the interview episode with clete roberts I forget what season but it's in the later season five maybe?

[saeyoungs-angel]

Hey lovely, if you don’t have too many asks id like to request shota or denki with a partner that struggles with depression, mainly with taking care of them selves in this. like hygiene, getting out of bed or doing anything really. denki or shota help them do little things that. i think you know what i mean so just write it how ever you want or don’t, if you are uncomfortable with this.

⨳​ punctilious — mha

starring. aizawa & you

plot. you may think you’re slick, but your boyfriend pays attention to everything. this includes the lack of care that you’ve shown yourself, recently.

genre. comfort, fluff

cw. mentions of depressive episodes and depressive behaviors

notes. god i am so sorry it took me so long to get to this, my writers block is so fuckin bad rn but i managed to finish it! i hope u see this since i cant tag u and idk if ur following me but if u do then i hope u enjoy it:)

likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated! <3

𓆩☆𓆪

“(y/n), this is the fourth day in a row that you’ve slept in so late.”

you grumble in your half-asleep state, swiftly snatching the blanket he had so rudely stolen from over you. you tuck it back underneath your weary arms and roll away from aizawa.

huffing, you reply in a slurry manner. “tired, shota. didn’t get enough sleep.”

he hums, tilting above you to reach your furrowed eyebrows—he softly thumbs the crease forming in between them.

“stop that, you’ll look old.” he chides, feeling a bit hopeless with your attitude. he knows very well that your sleeping pattern has been through the ringer this past week, and he also knows he can’t force you to fix it.

that said, he still stubbornly wants to try.

“hey, sweetheart. if you get up now, we’ll go to a cat cafe. how’s that sound?”

your eyes fly open, only to dim moments after.

“not feelin’ it today, sorry sho.”

now, aizawa isn’t surprised by much, but this? this has him reeling on the inside. you never turn down an invite to a cafe, let alone one filled with cats.

something is amiss, definitely. though he’d like to speak with you about it directly, he’s worried that you’ll close yourself off even more—it’s not like you never confide in him, but you’re obviously keeping something from him.

he decides to let you rest, offering him enough time to consider his options.

when the sun begins to set, aizawa grows concerned. why are you sleeping so late now? with only solicitous thoughts of you clouding his mind, he shuffles quickly towards your shared bedroom.

creaking the door open, he finds the lights still untouched. “sweetheart?”

his eyes adjust, tracing the outline of your face that’s illuminated by your phone light—which isn’t very bright, probably because you’ve been in the dark all day long.

“hm? oh, sorry. i got stuck on social media.” you end your excuse with a light laugh, not even inching to shut of the device while your eyes lay on him.

he shakes his head and dismisses your words, moving to seat himself on the edge of the bed closest to you. he grasps your hand in his, smiling at you in concern.

“you haven’t been out of the room today, you know? it’s eight o’clock already.”

his voice brings silence with it, you averting your eyes as you can sense what’s ahead of you. scrolling on your phone, you distract yourself unsuccessfully.

“is there something you want to tell me?”

your scrolling pauses for a brief moment, just before you regain yourself and continue. your heart is by your feet and you have no idea where you should take the conversation now.

“i’m—i, uh. fuck, sho. i’m having trouble, alright? that’s all, and i’ll be okay in time. don’t worry about me, please.”

the last sentence drops from your lips and aizawa worries more than ever—those words always come from someone that needs to be worried about.

“quit it. i’m here to help you, not scold you or something. i’m your boyfriend, (y/n), not your mother. i can’t do anything if you refuse my help, but i’m asking you to let me help you.”

your scrolling doesn’t pause this time, it ceases completely. you shut off your phone, the room dimming before you reach for the lamp and switch it on. your vision is a bit blurry and you’re trembling ever-so-slightly, but you respond.

“okay.” with a shaky voice, you nod your head in extra confirmation.

aizawa’s lips turn upwards just lightly, “then it’s a deal. just one more thing, though. i need you to work with me, you have to try, alright? i’ll be here with you for every step, but i need you here as well.”

that’s how it started, you and aizawa both working to turn your episode upside down. two is better than one, right?

“hey, time to get up. i gave you an extra hour, so i expect a kiss after you shower and brush your teeth.”

you sneer, hating the fact that he knows you would’ve preferred to stay in bed and skip those things.

“why not now?” your tone is playful, yet he answers you honestly.

“because it’ll also be a reward for you, sweetheart. now get up, we’re going for coffee.”

the moment the toothpaste reaches your mouth, you gag lightly. after some time without tasting it, the feeling it leaves on your tongue is unfamiliar—aizawa is immediately by your side, brushing his teeth with you.

staring at him through the wide mirror, you smile to yourself. having someone next to you doing the exact same thing effortlessly may not be super comforting, but as he smiles back towards you the world seems just a bit brighter.

he snags your attention through the reflective surface, pointing from you to himself. your eyes leer on him as he counts on his fingers to a certain number, then switches his toothbrush to the other side. he wants you to repeat it, that much you can tell.

as you follow his actions, you turn it into a tiny game for yourself. thirty seconds, done. thirty seconds, done. thirty seconds, done. thirty seconds, aaand completely done.

“that wasn’t so hard, right angel?” he smiles down at you as you flip him off sarcastically.

“actually, it’s easier than i remember it. that might be because you’re here, though.”

critical hit, 98 damage dealt to shota aizawa!

𓆩☆𓆪

feedback is extremely meaningful!

#mha x reader #bnha x reader #bnha x y/n #bnha x you #mha x y/n #mha x you #mha fluff #mha imagine #bnha fluff #bnha aizawa #aizawa fluff #my hero academia aizawa #aizawa x reader #shota aizawa #aizawa comfort #mha comfort #bnha comfort #aizawa x you #aizawa x y/n #shota x reader #shota comfort #saeyoungs-angel

[uglypastels]

Remember that episode where Jackie and Hyde go on a first date?? And he drapes his jacket over her shoulders and they end up kissing under the stars? Maybe you could write something with Hyde!Eddie and Jackie!Reader????

ok so i'm using this as a sequel to my previous request (but i think it can technically be read separately as well. you do you). idk what I'm on when writing these. i had so many ideas its just... anyway haha

warnings: not proofread. cursing. awkwardness. female!Henderson!reader

masterlist. || join the Stranger Things taglist

A kiss filled with pent-up tension and emotions is how it should have ended, right? That should have sealed the deal; it should have been the beginning of the happily ever after, shouldn’t it? 

That couldn’t have been further from the truth. 

After that kiss in the hallway, things had reached a new maximum of awkwardness between you and Eddie. 

‘You’re still a jerk, Munson,’ you said, and nothing followed. Neither of you said anything. Finally, Eddie dropped his hands, which fell lifelessly to his sides, and he took a step back. So did you, hitting the door. 

‘No need to remind me, sweetheart.’ He might have smirked saying that, but in the dark hallways, in the deep evening of Friday, it was hard for you to tell. So, blindly, you opened the door and made your way home, not looking back and keeping your thoughts as far from Eddie as you could. That second part, though, seemed to be more challenging than expected. 

Never before had you really given Eddie Munson much thought. He was just your brother’s freaky Dungeon Master, the school’s scapegoat. From what Dustin had told you, he seemed nice but then whenever you saw him… what did you actually think? It was hard to think back to any other day. It was as if that kiss had blocked that ability for you. 

On Monday, you had decided it would be the best thing to do to just ignore him. He seemed to have had a similar idea, as you did not see him until Wednesday noon in the cafeteria.

‘Hey, you forgot your lunch again.’ you threw the brown paper bag in front of Dustin, who thanked you over and over. The plan was to give your brother his food and make yourself scarce, but you had made the mistake of looking up. Your eyes immediately locked with Eddie’s. One blink was, luckily, enough to break you out of the trance and without another word, you left. The boys at the table didn’t even wait for you to distance yourself before talking about you. 

‘What’s wrong with your sister?’ One of the Hellfire guys (you never learned their names) asked, but you never got to hear Dustin’s answer, for you were already across the room. 

◈

‘Is everything ok? You’ve been acting strange, and not like your usual strange, but extra strange-y.’ Robin asked as the two of you roamed around in the library for books.

‘Yeah, of course,’ you shrugged, ‘why would you ask?’

‘Uhm, I just explained it.’ She picked up a book and put it back in its place without even reading the title.

‘I’m fine.’ And you meant it, for in the moment, you did actually feel quite alright. It was already a week since the kiss, and nothing had happened. Clearly, whatever had been in the corridor last Friday was a freak accident, and you and Eddie both decided on the healthy mature thing to do– bury it deep and never speak of it, or to each other, ever again. Done. 

And maybe Robin would have believed you if it wasn’t for your annoying little brother running into the library, followed by his friend Mike, and immediately getting shushed by Mrs Corey, the librarian. You could hear Dustin whisper-shout “sorry!” before turning the corner and finding you. 

‘There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you.’ 

‘Why? Did you forget your lunch again? Because you’re not getting my sandwiches–’

‘No. no.’ He shook his head. ‘We need a sub for the campaign today. Gareth’s out cold with the flu and we need another player if we ever want to beat–’ 

‘Forget it.’ You didn’t need to hear the rest of it. 

‘Oh c’mon, please.’ Dustin begged, ‘I’ll do the dishes– for the entire week!’

‘After you made my drive out to school last week for nothing because you couldn’t be bothered to let me know you were hitching a ride? Forget it, pipsqueak.’ 

‘I’ll clean your room!’ Dustin was starting to get louder and quickly toned it down.

‘Stay out of my room.’ You threatened. ‘No. I am not setting foot in that room again.’ You made your point.

‘Fine. Fine.’ Dastin backed away and pulled Mike along with him. You were now left with a confused Robin who was trying to put all the puzzle pieces together. 

‘Was it really that bad to drive to school?’ 

‘No, I just– I don’t want to see Eddie right now, let alone play a stupid game for a whole night.’ 

‘I didn’t know things were that between you too. I thought he was just annoying.’ Robin put another unread book back. 

‘Why can’t that be enough?’ 

‘It can be… just not for you. I’ve never seen you dislike anyone without reason. Unless something happened between you two that you are now too ashamed about to even look him in the eye.’ It was typical of Robin to make a crazy assumption that hit the nail right on its head without her even realising it. She laughed at her own absurd theory until she looked over at you and realised you were quiet. More quiet than normal, and looking anywhere but at her. ‘No.’ 

‘What?’ You glanced her way, arms crossed, almost as if you were protecting yourself.

‘No.’ She got louder. ‘Did you and Eddie–’ She was so loud, you had no choice but to quickly slap your hand over her mouth, making her laugh hysterically. Once you released her, Robin asked: ‘What the hell happened between you two?’ 

‘Nothing!’ you hissed, not very convincingly. Just by the way Robin was looking at you, you could tell she was not impressed. With a roll of your eyes, you answered her truthfully this time. ‘He… uhm– Eddie kissed me.’ 

‘Oh my god!’ She was ready to let the entire library know, but shut up at the stern look you gave her. ‘So what does this mean? Do you like him? Why are you ignoring each other?’ 

‘I don’t.’ What was that supposed to answer exactly? ‘I don’t like him. And I’m ignoring him because it’s awkward and I don’t understand…’ 

‘Don’t understand what?’ Robin asked. 

‘Why the hell did he do it?’

‘You’re more hopeless than I am, seriously.’ She sighed, grabbing a random book off the shelf and dividing that one was the right pick. Without another word said, she walked away, leading you to follow behind, trying to figure out what she meant. What did any of it mean? Did you actually like Eddie?

◈

Would have helped to know Eddie was having a very similar conversation a few miles away? With the one and only Steve Harrington? 

He left school almost as soon as he arrived there. Hours later, the skidmarks of his van’s wheels were still on the parking lot in front of the building. And what was the reason for this panic-induced retreat? Well, he saw you walk through those doors. The same ones that the two of you had stood in front of a week prior. He watched you walk inside next to your friend, laughing, and he immediately decided to call it a day. 

Everything in that building just reminded him of how stupid he was. How stupid he was for doing what he did. Why the hell did he kiss you? And it wasn’t like it solved anything, either. 

He spent the next hour driving around town, almost decided to leave it and drive straight to the big city, but turned around when his gas meter was dangerously close to that bright red E. On his way to the gas station, however, he parked in front of Family Videos. Steve worked Fridays, didn’t he? 

‘Shouldn’t you be in English class now?’ Steve asked at the sound of the door opening without even bothering to look up from the magazine he was reading. The store was empty beside the two of them. 

‘We’ll get back to you apparently knowing my school schedule later, Harrington. I fucked up.’ Eddie took a few steps to the counter and sat on top of it, almost knocking down the small display that Steve had just been working on.

‘How many times do I have to tell you? Don’t give out discounts to every pretty chick that comes up to you, it just makes you look cheap and needy—

‘I kissed her.’ Eddie blurted out. Walking in, he had considered trying to play the subtle card, not directly tell Steve about his problem, but if there was someone who could help him, it must be Harrington, wouldn’t it?

‘Excuse me?’ Steve blinked. 

‘I kissed her. Last friday.’

‘And by “her”, you mean–’

‘You know who I mean.’ Eddie sighed. 

‘Well, shit, man.’ Steve chuckled under his breath, closing his magazine and rolling it up. ‘How was it?’ 

‘Fine.’ 

‘Just “fine”?’ Steve raised a brow. ‘Well, how did she react? What did you say?’ 

‘Well,’ Eddie tried to think back to that night without bringing up too many memories, just so as not to trigger a trauma or something. ‘Pretty sure I said “sorry”. She called me a jerk and… we haven’t talked since. More or less.’ 

‘And you’re sure you’re not a virgin?’ 

Eddie punched Steve in the arm. 

‘Ok, sorry. But you like her, right?’ 

‘No?’ For that, Eddie received a smack in the face with the rolled-up magazine. ‘What was that for?!’ 

‘No? You spent months looking out for this girl, witchhunting her boyfriend, then you kiss her and suddenly you have no feelings for her?’

‘It wasn’t months...’ Eddie felt like a little kid trying to win an argument he was too stubborn to admit defeat about. 

‘I say, ask her out.’

‘Did you miss the part where I said we haven’t talked for the past week? I’m pretty sure she hates me.’ Eddie was still rubbing the bridge of his nose, where Steve seemed to have aimed directly. 

‘And I’m pretty sure you’re a chicken. Just go talk to her, man. Ignoring her won’t help you. And het, you either get a date out of it, which is a win, or she kicks you to the curb and you get some closure, which is also a win.’

‘She’ll never agree.’

‘Then you better rent a movie, because this is becoming a real waste of my time.’ 

◈

It had been a long day, but at least an Eddie-free one. Before going home, you quickly passed your locker to get your books and jacket, but to your surprise, you were met with something else. A small, torn, piece of paper fell at your feet. 

In black marker, the words were scratched out messily: Meet me at the bleachers? 

Now, you could only assume, but it felt like he tried to remain anonymous– which was hard when posters covered in his equally unimpressive handwriting were all over the school, promoting either the upcoming battle of the bands show or his own gigs at the hideout. Yeah, you knew it was Eddie, 100%. 

So, why you actually decided to go to the football field was a mystery to you. The team was running drills around, and some students were seated in the audience, not exactly paying attention to the jocks. It was always more of an after-school hang-out spot where people didn’t do their homework after promising themselves to get it done the entire week. 

Eddie was sitting on top of the bleachers. Leaned back on the bench behind him, leather jacket on his lap. As you climbed up the steps, he suddenly straightened his back and waved awkwardly. ‘Hey.’ 

‘I didn’t even know you knew this place existed.’ 

‘Please, I may be a social disgrace, but I’m not an idiot– so this is what they call football, huh?’ He glanced over at the team of boys running around below you. 

‘Why am I here, Munson?’ You thought about sitting down next to him but decided against it for now. 

‘I was just thinking about… last week.’ Great. That was the last thing you hoped he was doing, but you let him continue. ‘And I know I fucked up. Everyone’s noticed that something’s up.’ 

‘Everyone?’ Your throat suddenly felt extremely tight. 

‘So I’ll just say that I’m sorry. I’m sorry for how I’ve acted before, and during and after. And I totally understand if you don’t ever want to see or speak to me again, just don’t stop Dustin from coming to Hellfire–’

‘What?’

‘What?’ He blinked at your sudden outburst of a question. 

‘Is this all about Dustin? You don’t want me to ruin your dumb campaign? Jesus, Munson–’ You were glad that you had not sit down. What a waste of time.

‘No, shit. I’ve been thinking about this for the last hour and— fuck.’ He was visibly getting frustrated now with himself, rubbing his hand all over his face as he let his thoughts sink back down slowly. ‘I just meant, I know that you and Dustin are close, so he would probably listen to you and stop hanging out with us– Hellfire– if you told him to, which would be a shame for him because the little dude’s got skills with the d20 and I think letting him be in a creative environment– what the fuck do I know, I’m not your family therapist–’ he chuckled. So this was meant to be a joke, right? But you weren’t laughing, too confused at everything he was verbally throwing at you. 

‘That is all besides the point, because I… wanted to actually make up for how I’ve been the last few days.’ 

‘How would you do that?’ You inquired, crossing your arms.

‘Let me take you out?’

‘Like on a date?’ 

‘I wanted to say a joke, but if it doesn’t land, I would live up too much to my reputation in this town, which is not what I’m going for right now, so yes… like a date.’ He sighed deeply.

You let him sit there for a moment as you pondered on an answer. His big brown eyes looked up at you expectantly. There was no way anything good could come out of this…

‘Ok.’ You readjusted the strap of your bag. ‘Pick me up at 8.’ 

‘Tonight?’ Eddie called after you as you already started your departure. 

‘Yes tonight.’ You said without turning around. 

◈

Eddie was panicking all the way until the clock struck 8 o’clock, and if only he could say this feeling stopped the second he saw you. His heart was in his throat the whole walk back to his car and inside it and as he started driving. Words just wouldn’t come out. He was sure you expected something, something he for sure did not have. He had no idea what he was doing.  

‘Do you just want to drive around? And then maybe grab something to eat?’ You suggested, saving his life. 

‘Uhm,’ Eddie cleared his throat as he took a turn, ‘sure. Or let’s get something now and then… I know this spot we can hang out.’

‘Yeah, ok.’ You smiled.

Now, Eddie was no asshole, so he was willing to pay for the food. The problem, however, was that his budget was limited, so the only thing he could afford was burgers and milkshakes. But you didn’t seem to mind, thankfully. 

Twenty minutes later, Eddie drove to the woods while you both sipped on your milkshakes, the burgers still warm in the foil packaging until you parked– Eddie’s van, to your great surprise, was surprisingly clean, and the seats would probably be a bitch to get mustard stains out of. 

‘And here we are,’ Eddie stopped the car in a small clearing. The trees towered over you but opened up to reveal a beautiful patch of the night sky. ‘Here,’ he helped you get up on the hood of the car before pulling himself up to sit next to you. The milkshakes were almost gone, but the burgers were still warm and delicious. You both ate in silence, enjoying the atmosphere. 

Once you were done with your burger, you leaned back against the window to look up at the stars. Eddie sat more upfront, slurping the last bits of his milkshake. You were together, yet apart. Enjoying each other’s company individually. 

‘I got coke– soda— in the van, if you want anything else to drink.’ Eddie said, slowly making his way to lie down next to you. 

‘What, no beer?’ You giggled.

‘Well, yeah, that too, obviously. Just didn’t think you’d be the type to drink it.’

‘So what type do I look like?’ 

‘Aren’t you always drinking sodas on parties? But you seem a much more classy kind of girl. Wine and shit, you know.’

‘I don’t think I’ve ever had wine in my life.’ You started laughing more now, and Eddie joined in a little. ‘You have no idea what you’re talking about, do you?’

‘No.’ Then both of you burst out laughing. 

A little time went by, the conversation died down, and a shiver tickled over your arm as the trees around you rustled with the wind blowing by. It had been a pretty warm day, but you had not considered how drastically the weather would change by the time the sun would go down.

‘Are you cold?’ Eddie noticed.

‘No, I’m good,’ you tried to curl up, pull your legs up to your chest, to warm yourself up a bit, but Eddie didn’t believe you for a second. Before you could protest again, he pulled his jacket off and put it over your shoulders. ‘Thanks.’ 

He replied with a small nod. 

◈

‘I’m sorry.’ 

‘What for now?’ You had been ready to open the door of the car. The lights were still on in your house, meaning your mom and brother were expecting a detailed description of the whole night, as always, whenever anything remotely interesting happened to any of the three of you. But before you actually opened the door, Eddie had caught you by surprise with those little words. When you looked back at him, he actually looked small, and sad. Which you didn’t understand at all.

‘About the date.’ 

‘I don’t understand.’ 

‘For ruining it–’

‘You didn’t ruin it.’ You reached for his hand on the wheel. ‘Honestly, it was one of the best dates I’ve been on.’

‘We didn’t talk for like an hour.’ He looked embarrassed and as if he had failed or disappointed you in some way, which couldn’t be further from the truth.

‘That’s an exaggeration. And we don’t constantly have to be talking, do we? I really had a great time, Eddie.’ You leaned over and slowly, carefully, kissed him on the cheek. ‘Thank you.’

the end.

thank you for reading! please support your (not so) local writers with comments and reblogs <3 it means the world. also, I love to hear what you thought of the fic. asks are always welcome

consider leaving behind an anonymous review :p

eddie taglist:

@spiderrrling @dorianelizabeth @theletterhart @niyahwhoreworld @fopdoodle1624 @pastel-abyss-x @ghoulsgraveyard @prettytoxix @lovesickollie @xbreezymeadowsx @ssanjuniperoo @nxrdamp @meaganjm @yourmommilf @mischiefmanagers @capybergara @brother-lauren @h0sh1verse @ghostlyreads @croweaterr @ladyapplejackdnd @bilesxbilinskixlahey @kbakery @lizzylynch1 @liltimmyst @hellfire-state-of-mind @escape-in-time-x @miscelaa @sweetpeapod @the-a-word-2214 @eddiemunsonbby @mydearzero @overthewhiteclouds @wroteclassicaly @groupies-do-it-better @celestialsxturn @hoe4eddiemunson @inanausomewhere @scoops-harrington @fluffyharrington @billyhargrovesprincess

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson fic #eddie munson #imagine #fanfiction #fanfic #blurb #fluff #henderson!reader

[thequeenofsastiel]

What are your thoughts on Kanghan x Sailom dynamics after episode 3? You dropped a great meta last week that I can't stop thinking about, don't leave us hanging bestie, we wanna know more!!!;

So sorry for the delay in answering--I wanted to give it a few days to percolate and watch again--and now that I've done so, I do have a bit to say.

So Sailom was very firm when it came to tutoring. That could be misinterpreted as dominance, but it wasn't. I believe it stemmed from the immense honor that Sailom has. Kanghan's grandmother paid him, and Kanghan protected him. Sailom feels obliged to tutor Kanghan so that Kanghan can have a better life. And so he's not afraid to push Kanghan to succeed, because he believes he owes that to Kanghan.

There were a few Dom/sub moments. First was when Kanghan told Sailom to get on the bike after tutoring. He didn't say it calmly or encouragingly. He snapped at Sailom to get on in a very commanding tone. And Sailom--despite having just had flashbacks to Kanghan bullying him--nods and obeys.

The second, and third thing, were in the restaurant scene. Sailom, upon seeing the prices, instantly tried to run for it, but Kanghan ordered him to sit back down and eat there with him, saying that he was paying. And Sailom didn't argue. Which I find significant, given how averse he is to taking money without earning it. You'd think he would fight this more, just like he did with the tutoring money, but he didn't fight at all. He sat back down. Also, Kanghan ordered for him. Sailom actually specifically gave that power to Kanghan when he said he could eat anything, and Kanghan didn't even blink before accepting it.

The fourth was when Kanghan grabbed Sailom by the wrist and yanked him back to give him the steaks. He didn't need to do that. It was entirely unnecessary. Sailom would have turned back if Kanghan had asked him to. But Kanghan saw an excuse to get dominant with Sailom, and took it. And on Sailom's side, he didn't even bother fighting Kanghan at all. He allowed Kanghan to manhandle him, not pulling away, waiting for Kanghan to release him.

The fifth was the not-quite-kiss. Kanghan didn't hesitate to push Sailom against the wall when the idea occurred to him, and despite how annoyed Sailom behaved afterwards, he at no point even tried to push Kanghan away. He let Kanghan do what he wanted to do to him, just like with the wrist grab.

The last scene was one of the most interesting to me. Sailom actively fights with Kanghan, but he does it not out of dominance, but out of affection. And his asking Kanghan to study for him was so effective because Doms do want to impress their submissives. Admittedly there's equal desire on both sides to impress the other, just for different reasons. And we also got another example of Sailom throwing himself into Kanghan's arms, and Kanghan, despite deep emotional distress, can't help but return the hug. He even runs his hand up and down Sailom's back, and pats it. I don't quite know how to describe it, but it just looked like a Dom and a sub holding each other. Don't ask me to explain why it feels that way, it just does(okay I'll probably obsess over why and get back to you).

I hope you liked this meta! And thanks for saying you liked the first ones I did. It's nice to know at least some people enjoy it.

#dangerous romance #kanghansailom #sailomkanghan #kanghansailom meta #my meta #my asks #kanghansailom d/s meta

[bengiyo]

Love Mate Eps 7 & 8 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

Last week, Yi Jun and Ha Ram began pre-dating in earnest. Yi Jun wanted to see if he could properly care for someone again, so they slowed things down to get to know each other more. I loved it, because some relationships, especially gay ones, start physical and then the emotional work of getting to know the other gets skipped in lieu of sex. Yi Jun changed his entire project at work in light of his new relationship, but now it seems that the team wants to hire Yi Jun's cruel ex as the spokesperson and model for their project.

Episode 7

Ah, their first big difficulty. Yi Jun is pretending he's fine, but he's clearly not.

I don't like that knowing look DK gave Seo Yi Jun.

Work wife has a name! It's Jin Eun Sun.

This DK guy thinks he's slick, using his past history to sell his involvement and simultaneously trying to convince Yi Jun that he sees what he did to him now. I don't trust him.

I'll forgive Yi Jun for retreating into himself because he's just being distant, he still let Ha Ram hug him at work, and is considering telling Ha Ram what happened.

I'm mad at these flowers DK tried to give Yi Jun, because if he knew his tastes this well, and wanted to find him for three years, why would he break up in such a cruel way. It also looks like Yi Jun hasn't moved??

I liked the different levels of anger, offense, and disgust Cho Hyun Min conveyed as Yi Jun when DK was trying to lay on the charm. I like that DK is genuinely charming and laying it on thick, because that's how Ha Ram started as well. I like when a show adds context to earlier reticence by having an ex show up and use similar behaviors.

Okay, letting Ha Ram fall behind in the frame was a clever way to highlight the growing distance between them right as they get into a small fight about this. Ha Ram is not going to reveal that he already knows, and Yi Jun is rebuilding the original walls he had.

You better come through, Writer Jin Eun Sun!! She's the only one Ha Ram could talk to, and she said you better talk to your man! Someone get her a plate!

This studio knows how to use their limited time well. Having DK try to show that he's done the emotional work on himself by detailing all the ways Yi Jun took care of him works so well. We get to feel aghast as the cruel way he ended things with all of these reveals, and it cleverly places us with Ha Ram right after when DK seemingly won't take no for an answer.

OOO, classic yaoi framing. Putting Yi Jun between the two guys pursuing him as the final shot was a great choice.

Episode 8

He's his lover! Claim it!

Choosing neither of them is in line with Yi Jun, unfortunately. The writing is top-notch on this show. He tells DK he owes him nothing, and chides Ha Ram for being rude, before dismissing both of them.

That was an incredible break up scene. These are almost never good, but Yi Jun wanting to quit because he felt embarrassed by both guys pursuing him makes so much sense. His feelings for Ha Ram are new, and I totally get him backing off after being made to feel like a damsel or prize. Cooking a relationship because you feel like you can't commit to it is the choice we say people should make sometimes, so I'm excited to see how Yi Jun turns this around for himself.

Choosing DK is probably the right choice professionally, but it comes at the cost of connection. They're making a project about love and connection, so I doubt this will work.

Oh, I'm really glad Ha Ram and Yi Jun heard DK's conversation. We don't have enough time for just Ha Ram to know. Unfortunately, Yi Jun is just going to take it.

I do like that their manager worried about Seo Yi Jun when he didn't show up to work, knowing that was unusual.

I like Ha Ram a lot. You can't fix people's problems all the time, but you can love them even when they're being a bit mean to you until they find themselves again. "If it's hard to do this alone, I'll stay with you."

When Ha Ram said, "Expressing and receiving emotions is difficult for me, too," it made me think about the aggressive use of tropes earlier. We love tropes, because they're a way for us to understand the characters and their intentions. We like the ritualistic nature of them, but they don't always work because they're not always aligned with what the characters or even the audience wants out of the story. Yet we use them still, because we understand what they're trying to convey.

I don't think either of them is awful, but I like them giving themselves permission to make mistakes with each other.

I feel like I need to ping @respectthepetty because I feel like I'm seeing something with DK wearing red in this scene after using blue and mixed black and white earlier.

Sometimes you don't need words. Sometimes you just need to throw a drink in someone's face.

He set their photo from the wedding shoot as his background. I love this man.

Yi Jun's enamored smile as Ha Ram walks down in this suit is fantastic. Good job with this crew showing a brooding character finding his sunshine again.

Let me tell you, I go feral for the second, deeper kiss after the first one every time.

Oh good we're back in the boyfriend shirts for the domestic scene.

I like not showing DK again or any of the people cast for their program. It doesn't matter if DK did his job or not. He no longer has control over Seo Yi Jun.

Final Verdict: 9.5, Highly Recommended. This is our third outing with Studio Winsome, following My Sweet Dear and Our Dating Sim, and I think they may be on to something here. @shortpplfedup teases me for being a cynic because I always love the sad gays, and SHE IS RIGHT. I always go hard on the shows where a gay character has suffered and gets the chance to find happiness. This one is a little bit headier than Our Dating Sim, so I'm taking half a point; I felt like I needed to trust them to do something with the aggressive use of tropes earlier, and I'm glad it paid off. This team, more than any other Korean team, seems to understand how to maximize their limited time. I'm deeply impressed.

#love mate #love mate the series #korean bl #bl series #Ben watches

[shin-meddlesome-hero]

Thoughts on the G-Witch Finale

If there’s something I can say for certain is that this was a wild ride from start to finish, that’s undeniable.

My brain keeps short-circuiting when I try to form a coherent opinion about the ending. It definitely wasn’t perfect and, just like most part of the second cour, it needed more revisions and work to be better. There were many ideas and storylines that had a lot of potential but weren’t fully developed. Nonetheless I’m glad that they were included.

What I expected for this ending was that at least Suletta and Miorine would end up together, I thought that would be acceptable even if the other storylines had a rushed resolution (because, let’s face it, it was very hard to give a satisfactory ending to all the conflicts from the series in only one episode). I wasn’t expecting at all an ending where Prospera and Eri survived, that pulled the rug from under my feet. For some time I saw this resolution as corny and overly idealistic, but now I think that that’s not necessarily a bad thing. During the episode, Suletta is told several times that she wouldn’t be able to achieve what she’s aiming for, but she still goes for it and gets everything that she wished for and more. She was supposed to be a tragic character but she went against that script and earned her happy ending; the more I look at things from this perspective, the more ok I am with the resolution.

Last week I was wondering where would Eri’s character arc go if she survived, it turned out that she was finally able to choose what she wanted and she chose to be with Suletta, she also accompanies Miorine to Qin Harbor which shows that she’s taking responsibility for her past mistakes. That’s a good direction for her character arc… although the fact that she ended up in a silly keychain is still super weird. It’s obvious that if she was going to live, it would’ve been cruel to put her in another Mobile Suit, but there were other options, she could’ve been in a tablet, or in a cyborg’s body or even a Haro would’ve been nice. The keychain is just too much… it’s funny, but weird. Also, there’s really no explanation on how she got there. Only Suletta knows and she’s not going to tell. (It’s space magic, I guess). My point is that if the writers were planning to let her live, they needed to work more on how that could be achieved.

As for Prospera, at least she won’t be able to cause more harm and she seems to be in peace. It would’ve been good to know more of her thoughts at the end.

Now, regarding that other criticism about the ending, I have the impression that Sunrise/Bandai/whoever is responsible for the franchise was trying to play safe. It took more than 40 years for Gundam to have a female protagonist and it’s quite telling that they chose someone like Suletta who is extremely nice and precious. Maybe they thought that a protagonist like Elnora or even like Chu-Chu would’ve been more intimidating. There’s also the fact that the series only lasted 24 episodes instead of the usual 50. I can be wrong but it seems that they weren’t sure that the series would succeed so they didn’t want to take many risks. I think that’s why even if at the end it’s obvious that Suletta and Miorine are married, we didn’t see a kiss or the wedding. Maybe what we got was all that the writers were able to get away with. I really don’t know how things work in Japan when it comes to lgbtq+ themes on series that aren’t explicitly yuri or yaoi, so I’m just speculating.

I didn’t dislike the ending, but I think that the series needed more episodes to develop all the ideas that the writers had in mind, maybe with that, they would’ve nailed it.

Finally, I wouldn’t want a continuation for this story, Suletta, Miorine and their family are fine and it’s better if the narrative leaves them alone. However, a movie retelling could be great, also it would be nice to have novels, manga or OVA’s about what happened during the time skips, many elements and characters of this universe need to be explored more. (Particularly I think that there were many things about Miorine and her family that the story should’ve tackled). All in all if I try to be objective I would give the series a 7.5/10… but it gets an 8/10 for effort, and because I’m soft at grading… and also because I really liked it despite all. So, I still recommend it and I’m glad that this was the series that introduced me to Gundam.

P.S: Really liked that call back to episode 1 with Miorine being the one to rescue Suletta in space. That part was excellent.

#g witch spoilers #gundam the witch from mercury #gundam suisei no majo #gundam #long post #I feel like despite all I still really really love this series #the characters are amazing #despite its faults the anime was made with love #and it really shows #gundamblogging

[man-down-in-hatchet-town]

Sheep Go To Heaven

Just to be clear, I ALWAYS listen to these episodes the day they drop. I'm just tragically busy and ADHD (also PULP WEEK asdfghiohwefgoiaje damn those fucking torpedoes) so it sometimes takes me a while to get to the actual re-listening and writing up my thoughts.

Anyway, spoilers for Episode 8 of The Case of the Greater Gatsby below the cut!

Well, guys, it took us eight episodes but we finally got some answers! We now know what's going on in Bixby's back room: a daily meet-up of Socialist creatives run by Dorothy Parker! Anyone who actually reads these will know that I had theories that turned out to be completely wrong, but who cares? Honestly I'm just relieved that "one of the last few good men in Hollywood" isn't into anything questionable, but is actually doing something very cool and decent indeed.

But it wouldn't be a complex 20+ episode murder mystery if our first real answer clicked everything into place. For the one question answered, other have sprung up like heads of a hydra. For one thing, what exactly is Mo's game here? Are the Socialists his main project, and Fitzgerald's death an inconvenient sideplot he now has to deal with (perhaps explaining part of why he's stayed private on the murder--he doesn't want anything so trivial to get in the way of his career-making Socialist Bust)? Or did he start with Fitzgerald, and work his way to the Socialists just as Fig and Ford have? That doesn't seem very likely, judging by how quickly he's moved. Or perhaps it's all one and the same, and he's investigating the murder as part of his anti-Socialist crackdown, and keeping it under the radar for some other reason (I imagine it's easier to investigate a murder if the perpetrator doesn't know anyone's looking for them). Or maybe, weeks after he's receded from our list of most suspicious figures, we're getting clues that Mo really is the murderer after all? Could his investigation into Bixby's back room have spun out of control and led to Fitzy's death? On a meta-level, making the murderer super suspicious at the start and then pointedly distracting and moving away from him is a really clever way of obscuring the solution from a genre-savvy audience.

Oh! A thought! Perhaps Mo's presence on the lot had nothing to do with Mel at all! Maybe he stopped by to speak with her as an excuse to get an eye on Darby and Leery, since they're both members of Bixby's Brigade...

(Regardless, Comrade Ford is about to get in Mo's way. I love Ford.)

But then we have The Grapes of Wrath angle. Last episode, we learned that all of the actors receiving death threats were connected with adaptions. This episode, however, we learned that two of the adaptions, The Grapes of Wrath and The Philadelphia Story, can be tied back to the Brigade. So which is it? Do all of the threatened films lead back to Dorothy Parker's lunch club? That seems unlikely... On the other hand, Barnaby Nightingale is not directly associated with any film adaption but IS connected to the Brigade, since they're getting advanced copies of the Nightingale Gazette. Is there more to their deal with Barnaby than meets the eye?

And there's the fact that F. Scott Fitzgerald, noted genius, wrote the absolute garbage-fire script for The Grapes of Wrath. We're living under capitalism, many professional writers have bad commercial they're not proud of, but there's something out-of-character about that particular career move that I can't quite ignore.

And not to mention the fact that Vivian lost out on the lead role in a film her lover wrote the script for...

In other news, Dorothy has pointed them in the direction of one of Fitzgerald's old enemies, Donald Ogden Stewart of The Philadelphia Story fame. While I think it's safe to assume that real historical figure Stewart won't be the bad guy, I'm interested to see if he'll be an important step on the way to cracking this case, or just another complete red herring soup for the cast to stick their faces in. And Zelda's come to town, which means we should finally be getting the wonderful Tessa Netting soon!

Now I'm off to listen to the next episode!

#are Shipwrecked gonna make me finally watch The Philadelphia Story? #it remains to be seen #genuinely thought it was the same movie as Philadelphia for YEARS but that's another matter #fig and ford #shipwrecked comedy #the case of the greater gatsby #mo beats #bixby #the case of the greater gatsby episode 8 #sheep go to heaven

[dearestxiao]

Hey I just wanted to ask and I'm sorry if this makes you uncomfy but what happened to saekogun? I missed your #junesdegeneracyau and then I found out everything disappeared which was weird bcs I recall seeing ur blog in like March 2022

hi there nonnie... omg wow it's been such a long time since I've actually posted on this blog. thank you so much for the concern and to anyone else who's asked about me.

to give a quick tldr as to what happened with saekogun exactly: I took a break from writing right around a point in my life where I was both very busy, and slowly becoming more and more happy. the break turned out to be much longer than I thought it would be, and I one day decided to get rid of saekogun. my mental health has improved immensely, and I just wanted to say hello again.

I will start this off by saying I am very much alive and well. at the start of my first semester last year I decided to take a break from writing so that I could focus on my classes and internship and... just about everything else life had in store for me. it was initially supposed to be a short two week break, which is why I had initially never posted about it. but as more and more time went on, big (good) things kept happening in my life, and I had felt as if my mental health had additionally improved being away from tumblr. I decided that, for the sake of my mental well-being, I would not return for quite some time until I was fully stable enough to do so.

tumblr was a really weird source of turmoil in my life back then, which is kind of funny to say now that I look back on it (it sounds sooooo unserious, I know I know). I never talked about this openingly on my blog, but I did struggle a lot with my mental health, especially as someone with bpd. during the time that I wrote for saekogun, I had consistent and heavy episodes and mood swings. I knew no one else with bpd nor did I have someone I could talk about it with, so I felt a bit alone.

I felt very alone in my struggles and used tumblr as a sort of crutch and aid and it helped. immensely. but it also hurt me in different ways. I treated tumblr as a big responsibility in my life and it felt like I had a full time job as a content creator. I'm also neurodivergent and my executive function issues were beating me up without remorse. this was at a point in my life where I really did not have time for running my blog, but writing and interacting with the lovely following I had generated felt great. it was just too much for me though unfortunately, so I decided to move on.

I decided that I would keep the blog up running so that people could still enjoy it in my absence. however, one night after thinking on it for months I decided to just get rid of it. it sounds odd, but now that I was healing, that blog was just too representative and tied to a bad era of my life for me to want it to keep existing. so I banished it into the void, never to be seen again.

a lot of stuff has happened between now and then. to keep things short and sweet, I'm a lot happier now. I won't say things are absolutely perfect, because not everything can be of course, but I feel as though I've healed and grown. some amazing things have happened and for the first time in years I experienced true joy for a very long period of time. I'll stop myself from rambling before I get too cheesy and corny. but just know that it fr does get better y'all. I'm so glad I've lived long enough to a point where I can confidently say that.

I have a lot of regrets when it comes to saekogun. I definitely was not the best blog runner. I was constantly behind on asks and projects and I made lots and lots of mistakes when it came to my posting schedules and how I handled asks. I had so many asks that I never got to and made so many promises I couldn't keep. for that I deeply and utterly apologize. I do wish that I had done better and am sorry to those who've I disappointed. I thank everyone who had took the time to send something in and put time and energy into my blog.

another regret I have is not saving the color blue before I had gotten rid of the blog. that story is unfortunately lost to time itself since I don't have any portion of it saved. which sucks because if there was anything I'd continue to write about here from my old blog, it'd be that, but I have no access to it now.

I'm also sorry for anyone I have worried in my absence. I really should have made a post sooner, but I honestly had no idea what to say. I didn't know how to come back, and the longer I took to say anything, the harder it got.

I am beyond grateful for everything you've all had done for me, and for sticking around and checking up on me, and for enjoying my content in the first place. I cannot put into words how much it means to me for people to have cared about my silly little degenerate posts. from the bottom of my heart, I seriously thank you all. I also thank my sweet anons, old mutuals, and any followers who are still here.

now, onto the big question: will I ever write for this blog again? the answer is... iffy. I often fantasize about being able to write again, but the truth is I'm not into genshin anymore whatsoever, which is an issue since my primary fandom was always genshin. at some point after sumeru's initial release, I was simply just not as into the game anymore, and was too busy to actually sit down and play. I have no idea what's going on lore or game wise, and anything thats happened fandom wise either.

unfortunately, I'm not interested in getting back into genshin, so I'm very sorry to disappoint anyone who was hoping for more content like what I used to create.

however, I love writing. and I'm still really into yanderes and dark fiction as a whole. but I'm currently not into any fandoms that I think people would really be interested in so I don't think I have much to offer in terms of content. so for now, it's a... maybe? I guess we can talk about that as time goes by.

this is absolutely not to promise I'll actually be back though. I'm not sure if I'd be able to run a blog still to be honest, atleast not consistently. but I would love to drop by and post a little something every now and then and talk with you all.

thank you all once again, and thanks to whoever read this entire mess of words. listen, I'm rusty okay 😔

#june speaks!

[mangosimoothie]

The Bachelorette: Episode 24 - After the Final Rose

Thank you all for following along with The Bachelorette - it was a wild time, and we live for the fans! For our final episode, we check in with the cast one year after the final rose. What's everyone up to? Hopefully living their best lives 

[soundtrack]

Aja and Zeke had a beautiful wedding a few months after their engagement. They decided to keep the guest list small since they were a little burnt out after having been on camera 24/7 for the first two months of their relationship.

Mostly Aja just wanted a formal photo op - I mean, look at her.

The main event of the wedding was definitely the "reception" (more like RAGER) they had afterwards at Blue's Cradle! Zeke and Aja chose not to live at the commune, but they still live pretty close by and come to visit every so often. And Aja always gets her cards read by her lovely new mother in law.

After Aja’s last reading, Corinne just smiled and said, “Y’all gotta big yard in de new place, yeah? Good.” 

We got to stop by the Queen-Byrd household at their adorable and eclectic home in ATL to see how things were going. Aja and Zeke both say they've never been happier and more fulfilled. There's a lot going on! Black Beauty Babies is going stronger than ever, and combining with Blue's Cradle's resources has made both organizations able to help an incredible amount of people. They've also been continuing their "tomb raiding" adventures - helping indigenous communities with hidden and precious artifacts secure them before tourists/"explorers" can. They're getting a lot better at avoiding tomb traps. It seems like things are going great for our former bachelorette and her man. Let's see how it's going for everyone else

We weren't able to touch base with "Alanzo." In fact, nobody's been able to touch base with him for the last year. We've been told to ask you to contact the authorities if you see him.

After the show, Darion's girlfriend -- who he hadn't TECHNICALLY broken up with before going on The Bachelorette -- was so upset that she leaked his nudes and racy videos in an attempt to embarrass and out him. That backfired. The internet LOVED Darion. Things picked up for him pretty quick, first on social media then on the covers of magazines. Recently he launched Wolf Packer, which is being lauded as the Fendi of transmen's underwear. Looks like disrespecting women really paid off for him! Funny how that worked out.

Things didn't work out quite as well for "superstar" Bastien. After he was eliminated and Aja called him a "BAStard" #BastardBastien immediately started trending and stayed trending for 2 weeks, which is like a year in internet time. Because of all the bad press, Bastien's label dropped him. So now both Bastien and his tour are #CANCELLED

Ryan and Atticus are still together and deeply in love. Atticus decided to go against the wishes of his coven and turn Ryan to cure him of his cancer and ensure that they could spend their eternal lives together.

X'irron is doing more than fine! He took Aja's advice and continued his intergalactic travels. He hasn't quite gotten to the "finding himself" part of the journey, but he's definitely learning a lot ~getting to know~ all kinds of veeery interesting lifeforms.

And that's it! Thank you again for watching- oh wait, sorry. How could we forget sweet baby Cooper! Well...

Cooper's search for true love isn't over! Second time's the charm...That's how that phrase goes, right? (thank you to @maldeebee​ @holocene-sims​ and @utamuse​ for these beautiful girlies!!)

THE END 🌹  | PREVIOUS | BEGINNING 

Thank you again so much to everyone who’s been reading this story! I especially appreciate y’all that always comment and reblog and inbox me about it - that seriously means the world 🥺 so instead of leaving a like, leave a comment so we can talk about this crazy show now that it’s over 😔

#sims 4 bachelor challenge #sims 4 bachelorette challenge #ts4bachelorette #ep24 #zeke #queen-byrd household #alanzo #darion #bastien #katowin household #X'irron #Cooper #ts4bachelor #oc:ryan #*aja #*atticus

[supersonicsteaktacular]

Some thoughts on Miraculous Ladybug in general under the cut. Don't peek if you haven't caught up because i will be discussing season 5 including the finale.

Apologies if this is an incoherent read, i'm just writing as i think, this is just going to be a total mental vomit.

Ok so i had some complicated emotions when watching the finale. It was great in a lot of ways. We had some of the best fight scenes that miraculous has ever had and some undeniably cool moments, but i can't help but feel a little let down?

I think that's partly because of how long it's taken to get here. To call the pacing in miraculous glacial would be an understatement. Nothing much happened to shake up the status quo of Ladybug and Chat Noir fighting a villain of the week for like 4 seasons. Almost everything was world -building up until Gabriel got his hands on the miraculous.

So we had a story that was going slow suddenly going at a breakneck pace in season 5. Suddenly after 4 seasons of nothing happening, everything happens at once. Gabriel is coming out and fighting the heroes personally, Ladybug and Chat Noir are making plans that very nearly beat him and Gabriel gets wounded in a way that puts a timer on the plot. Things now HAVE to start moving faster.

In addition, the love square dynamics change for the first time in the show. It took 5 seasons to do what everyone wanted since season 1. Everything was exciting again!

And then they kinda blew their load on the first jerk??

Gabriel quickly went back to his villain of the week plans, the changes to the love square came and went within the first half of the season and ended up settling on the end of the love square with the least exciting dynamic?

It's pretty telling that the Love square is the most popular hetero ship on Ao3 in terms of number of fics. It has something like 10'000 more fics than the next most popular hetero ship. The love square is exciting in a way that no other ship is and there are people more eloquent than me on here that will wax philosophic as to why that is.

So it's a tradegy that nothing really changed with the love square until 5 seasons in, and then those changes were over in a flash. Flipped Ladynoir was gone in a few episodes, Marichat fucking burned twice as bright but a half as long and poor Ladrien never got a chance. Now i do like Adrinette but it's just a typical high school romance once you take away all the rest of the love square stuff. It's cute, but guess what? So are all of the other ships that i like. They took away what made the love square exciting enough to write 35'000 fics about.

So just about the only things left by the halfway point of the season to look forward to is defeating Gabriel once and for all and an identity reveal.

And NEITHER HAPPEN.

Gabriel actually ends up winning in the end. He gets to make a wish. In the final scene i was literally saying to my screen "WHERE'S THE CATCH??" but apparently there isn't one? Turns out all that pontificating about how a wish cannot be made without a huge sacrifice was for nothing. Maybe there will be a catch but we'll have to wait and see, and who knows how long we'll have to wait to see that plot point come to fruition.

And of course there was no identity reveal. In fact Chat Noir just flat out doesn't participate in the season finale. Let me repeat that. THE AGRESTE DOESN'T PARTICIPATE IN THE FINALE OF THE AGRESTE SAGA. You deserved so much better than being locked in your schrodinger box Adrien. You absolutely should've been there to deck your father in the face.

Sorry if this has come across as a whole bunch of complaining and salt. I just needed somewhere to reconcile my own thoughts. At the end of the day i really do love Miraculous. There's a reason i've been invested since season 1, there's a reason why i've always looked forward to new episodes releasing and why i've spent the last year desperately trying to avoid spoilers. It's clearly has something special even if i can't quite put my finger on it.

#miraculous ladybug #mlb #mlb season 5 spoilers #ml confrontation #ml recreation #confrontation spoilers #recreation spoilers #ml spoilers #ml season 5 spoilers

[it-is-only-a-novel]

Tw: antisemitism, racism, Nazis, invasion

So I've made a few posts talking about how the "Aces invade Denmark" and "world domination" jokes that have been circulating in the Ace community are harmful. I want to cover here what happened that lead to this.

What I'm writing here is based on "the Ace Couple" podcast episode "Aces DO NOT Invade Denmark!" that I referenced in my previous post here.

Around June 2021 on Reddit a there was a post (that has been deleted since, but was screenshot) that read:

It’s time for the Asexuals to invade Denmark. Let’s cut to the facts. It is estimated that 1% to 1.2% of the population is Asexual, which makes our ranks number about 75 million strong. The Danish forces only number about 92,000, which means we can easily overwhelm them. If we all mass in there, we can easily overthrow the Danish government and create the first Asexual state, free of hypersexualization and Acephobia. The time is now. We must rise up. Come to r/AsexualInvadeTheDanes, where the revolution will begin.

This subreddit exists and has, as of April 8th 2023, 7,000 members, and has posts from the last few days.

I remember seeing these memes and finding them quite funny. Aces are free to plan invasion because we aren't busy with things like sex! But, once I thought about it, I had a chance to see the dark side of it.

When you think about what the joke is about you realize, it's making light of colonization. It jokes about a country that had in the past been invaded by Nazis in WW2. Not a great look for us Aces.

The jokes subsided a little, after Russia invaded Ukraine. There seemed to have been an understanding that it was quite insensitive.

But, things took a turn for the worse during Ace week 2022. A Twitter flag mashup bot created a flag on October 27th, 2022. With the caption:

Special edition: Asexual pride + German Empire 1903 = Asexual Empire

The flag used the ace flag and in the middle had the Iron Cross.

This originated from a bot. If Aces had ignored it, we probably could move on. But unfortunately, that is not what happened. This post was very popular on Twitter amongst Aces who associated it with the invasion of Denmark, and was posted to Reddit as well. Many of the comments on this post, were referencing the invasion of Denmark, someone commented the “Asexual Reich”, and "Childlessness Reich".

This raises the question, how do we know these were Aces making these comments? Well, a lot of references to garlic bread, invasion of Denmark (that was not referenced in the tweet), and many wishes of happy pride, during Ace week. These are things unique to the community.

Now clearly, with the "Reich" references, people associated this flag with the Nazis, but I'll touch for a moment on the history of the Iron Cross.

According to Wikipedia:

The Iron Cross was a military decoration in the Kingdom of Prussia, and later in the German Empire (1871–1918) and Nazi Germany (1933–1945)

So originally it was a German symbol, and hadn't originated with the Nazis, but:

Hitler restored the Iron Cross in 1939 as a German decoration.

Clearly this is a Nazi symbol. Some of those who interacted with the tweet understood this and leaned in to it! Once our jokes get to Nazis, we have gone to far.

I'm absolutely not going to explain why Nazis are bad, and why we shouldn't be associated in anyway with them. If someone doesn't know, we have a serious problem.

But, I will remind everyone that Jewish Aces exist, that BIPOC Aces exist, that Danish Aces exist. These jokes are alienating us from the community, because they lead to antisemitism, and racism. Aces, we are better then this!

#ace #asexual #asexuality #tw antisemitism #tw rasicm #Denmark #the ace couple #M's post