#and then the dick measuring contest

[hydrachea]

I lied I'm not done laughing about the Fate route just yet. I'm still not over how accidentally suggestive the dialogue in the post-date fight is.

Yes Artoria. You go ahead and compare the... Strengths of your Noble Phantasms. You do that.

In a fight, right?

Gilgamesh?

In a fight, right?

#i'm not dying from laughter you are #fate stay night #artoria pendragon #gilgamesh #fate series #giltoria #gilturia #<- i mean i'm not used to spelling it like that but the vn calls her arturia pendragon #so do a lot of fics #so who am i to say #fate #anyway i'd like to pay a drink to both nasu and whoever translated those two lines #because they killed me on sight #oh yeah gil i know you want to take her sword #i know you want to cross swords with her #and then the dick measuring contest #my noble phantasm can blow up harder than yours #brb made myself cry laughing

[areyouscaredyet]

merry christmas to all, happy holidays and whatnot

i was absolutely baffled that my one gravespatel thing hit like. 10k notes so. here’s a phone doodle of them hanging out in the cold i guess :0

#flirting through intellectual dick measuring contests #they get to like each other #as a treat for once #I need to draw them as the guys from eltingville bc that’s what they are to me #toxic yaoi!! #spto #gideon graves #matthew patel #gravespatel #i drawd this

[mugiwara-lucy]

These fucking bums I swear 🤣

#one piece #captain trio #monkey d luffy #eustass kid #trafalgar law #i can't deal with these clowns! #it's a war and they're having a dick measuring contest 🤣

[strangegutz]

weaponry measuring contest

Davey belongs to @anonymouspuzzler !!

#heartbreak gulch #villain coded #i was originally gonna caption this “dick measuring contest” but didnt want people to think i was making an actual innuendo #theyre jusy boys showing off their toys

[abombihoney]

This totes happened after Alastor proudly proclaiming his new parental status.

#hazbin hotel #hh #alastor #angel dust #my art #comic #lucifer and alastor really did that dick measuring contest in front of everybody huh #wonder how much ribbing everyone got in before charlie returned from heaven

[sailor-arashi]

"Aura, the person standing before you is a mage who has lived for over a thousand years..."

#I love that the apprentices get epic fights #and Frieren just gets in a dick measuring contest #but frieren has the biggest dick of all #and I also love that she is the sneakiest mage of all #and always has been #and nobody knows it #frieren #sousou no frieren #frieren at the funeral #frieren beyond journey's end #葬送のフリーレン #sailor arashi gifs #gif warning #aura the guillotine

[yesterdayiwrote]

Red Bull possibly going for zeropods after seeing what happened to Merc is so insane, I almost respect the sheer nerve of it, but I also hope it fails miserably and they fall flat on their faces?

#f1 #formula 1 #Newey instigating a dick measuring contest just for funsies #Very Icarus coded of him

[lylailaeth]

My babies finally got a chance to do a bloodmagic and chill date night. Coudnt be happier for them

#that ignoring thr fact the night ended with Zoryas brother and his bf barging into her apartment #followed by the boys almost having literall dick measuring contest in her living room #vtm #vamily #vampire the masquerade #tremere #vtm oc #vampire art #zorya #art #vtm art

[landoffreaksandfrogs]

and then she died

#homestuck #homestuck art #feferi peixes #feferi homestuck #feferi im so sorry your entire arc was in between the most insufferable dick measuring contest between two fucked up dudes #i saw you fef. i saw that you werent even all that nice most of the time #you should get to be mean

[blmpff]

Playboyy (2023) 1x7

#dick measuring contest: aobpuen edition #playboyy the series #episode 7 #favorite scenes #aobpuen #blmpff

[spaghett-onaplate]

"Texas is such a big state" - and sure, it is! But it's funny when USAmericans say that to Australians, because:

4/6 states and 1/2 territories here are bigger than Texas. A visual depiction:

#not to do that whole international dick-measuring contest btw. it's just funny to me #texas #australia #geography

[prettyboykatsuki]

REAAAAAAL

the open dislike touya shows for you when fuyumi introduces you is intense. from the jump, he can tell what type you are. and it's not like he's one for acting like a protective big brother - he really doesn't give a rats ass about any of that. but he doesn't fucking like you. fuyumi is gushing about you, practically glued to you with big hearts in her eyes. she's naive because you treat her well. he's not the type to just sit around and peace keep for the sake of everyone else. he's still touya after all

so of course the tension is immediate. touya intimidates you first, because he's a scary guy. a frankensteins monster, he thinks that'll shake you. but it doesn't. he catches you smoking outside and you look just as smug as you did before. he's a scumbag. he knows the type. he knows what you are down to the very atoms but it's different, because your blase attitude doesn't seem fake in the slightest.

"touya-nii isn't a fan of me, huh?" your voice is cool, calm and smooth. you're not worried about it. it pisses him off for some reason "that's a shame."

"don't call me that. i'll fucking incinerate you."

"ohh, how scary," you say, ashing a cigarette - smiling knowingly in a way that gets on his nerves "you'll make your beloved sister cry."

#return to sender #i want to be in a weird gay dick measuring contest w him soooo bad

[kelsonius]

It's showtime!

#Alastor ready to start the dick measuring contest #I mean dad measuring contest #showtime #hazbin hotel #Lucifer #Lucifer Morningstar #hazbin hotel lucifer #Charlie Morningstar #hazbin hotel charlie #Alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #season 1 #episode 5 #s1e5 #1x5 #queue #kelsonius op

[quipxotic]

I've had some old episodes of Bell's Hells on in the background while doing stuff over the holidays. If you need a pick-me-up, I highly recommend rewatching c3e20-21, which is a hilarious, deadly romp of a story as the team breaks into and searches the Twilight Mirror Museum as part of a job to free Ashton of their debt to Jiana Hexum. Plus there's a lot of stuff in there that's either important later or an ongoing theme of the campaign: the first (?) mention of the Grim Verity, the name drop of Ebonold Kai, some information about Oltgar and the Hishari, hints about the failed burglary at Hexum's house, Chetney attacking Orym, and Ashton trying (and failing) to pickpocket Fearne while Ashley is out sick.

I also hope we get to see more of their rivals, Hutchin and The Verdict, as well as the owner of the museum and lover of ellipsis, Evon Hytroga. I would love to check in on how Hytroga and Hexum's rivalry is going. Have Hytroga's connections to the Clasp come back to bite him? Is the museum bankrupt yet? How are Zardro and Estani doing? After all their adventures, do Laudna and Imogen still want to build a cottage in Heartmoor Hamlet to retire to?

#critical role #bells hells #c3e20 #c3e21 #Yes I know it's the end of the world but give me the gossip on two criminal bosses and their art-based dick-measuring contests #critical role spoilers #I guess?

[snickerdoodlles]

plugging my Silver for Truth fic again since the rewatch event’s on the Tawan episodes 👀 for anyone who wanted a brothers-centric divergence to Tawan’s mess 😈

Summary:

Tawan dug himself a grave when he hurt Kinn all those years ago, now it’s time for Khun and Kim to put him in it.

#kprewatch2023 #kinnporsche #*wiggles this in everyone’s faces* #we have brothers bonding over shared murderous tendencies Kinn&Vegas having a dick measuring contest and Big gets to punch an asshole! #fun for the whole family! #unfortunately I haven’t finished Porsche’s bit on how he feels about this whole mess yet 😭 #not exactly a fix-it because I just broke things in new ways BUT we haven’t gotten to that part yet #so it can be a fix-it if you want it to be #ANYWAYS pls read I had so much fun with this one 🥺🙏 #cookie's writing

[doomednarrative]

Okay we all know what this actually is

#sm sm dick measuring contest with tofu as the setup #but also normal tendou behavior #kief watches kr kabuto