#and this little shit makes me viscerally upset

[dirtytransmasc]

no cause miles is just so young.

he calls his dad, cause he's scared and upset and overwhelmed and he just wants to hear his voice.

he hugs him, even when he's "not supposed" to, when he's not his son and instead spiderman, when his dad has no idea who he is and only sees a vigilante.

when he hugs his dad, he presses into his chest, cause he's too short to rest his head on his shoulder, and he squeezes his eyes shut, cause he's no doubt about to cry (and we can't really see it, but I'm pretty sure he can't fully wrap his arms around his dad, which kills me).

when he dad hugs him, he's practically able to fit Miles's head in his hand. and the way he ran into him in a split second, and before his dad even knew what was wrong, he just held him????

I can't do this today, he's just so little, he's a baby, and he's been through so much, it's not fair, just look at him, what did he do to deserve any of this?

#don't mind me #I've been in a very #idk how to explain it #kid mood I guess #like I've just been very emotional about kids and how small and innocent and fragile they are #kinda like baby fever #type emotional #but for kids in general #and this little shit makes me viscerally upset #like I get so sad over him I feel nauseous #his head fits in his dads hand #like #come on #how am I supposed to be ok with this #and the way he squeezes his eyes shut like he's trying not to cry???? #just put me down #he may be spiderman but he's just a little kid #give him a break #miles morales #miles morales 1610 #atsv #spider man: across the spider verse #itsv #into the spider verse #jefferson morales #jeff morales #jefferson davis #jeff davis

[weebsinstash]

Omega Reader being one of the only if not THE only Omega in an entire Spider Society of Alphas and Betas 😩❤️

Alpha F! Reader in a Spider Society where you're the only female Alpha and Miguel is Having Confusing Feelings because oh shit you can get him Pregnant Pregnant? Like you're packing? Hmmm.... 😳

Reader who is a normal human and doesn't understand or is maybe like "curiosity killed the cat" about "oh wow Miguel can purr and growl? What else can he do 😳" and you're totally unaware he can like, TELL when you're ovulating and you cant even tell when he or anyone else scents you (imagine hobie scenting you to piss miguel off lmao) 💦

Reader who is one of the very few Omega in a Spider Society of normal people but your pheromones actually still affect everyone lol so like yeah some people are yandere already and others are like "you know i dont know what it is but Reader is looking real submissive and breedable and im usually not even into that shit" 😏

Reader being a "late bloomer" where you thought you were like, a normie who didnt present, and you're suddenly struggling to function because all these people you've been bonding with suddenly all have special smells that make your knees wobble sometimes and occasionally your boss gets a little bit of a growl in his voice and you're suddenly thinking, "could I fuck him raw and just take plan b. I really want an extra large super sized buffet style creampie from this man" (and also angst/possessiveness because maybe you're really upset and want to go back to "being the old normal you" and you start avoiding people who mysteriously want to spend more time with you now more than ever, and I'm also a sucker for 'new Omega wants actual surgery or drugs to not be an Omega anymore even if it's blackmarket shit that could kill them') 🙏

I'm also a fan of like. "You burned me or deserted me or I quit the group we were in together because of how you treated me and after some time has passed now that you want me back I'm actually a single mom now and here's my cute adorable little baby that I won't let you even sniff at even though the dad isn't even in the picture"

Like I'm not a parent obviously but there's some real visceral horror in the concept of like being pregnant and you're surrounded by people like unreasonably obsessed with the fact you're pregnant, like to an extremely nosey controlling "all but hijack your life" degree. You put your baby down for a nap and go to check on then 5 minutes later and they're FUCKING GONE and you start absolutely losing your mind and its like "oh no it's fine, Peter B just felt entitled to break into your place because he wanted Mayday to meet her new sibling and spend time with their Uncle Peter"

Reader is in their home dimension maybe even refusing to be a Spider anymore and you've STILL got people CONSTANTLY literally warping to your location and robbing you of any and all privacy. You get woken up in the middle of the night by your baby crying and suddenly abruptly it stops and you turn around PANICKED and. There's Miguel bottle feeding them "because you've been so tired, let me help you 🥰" and you're freaking out because, one, Miguel what are you doing in my bedroom, and two, is he giving your baby fucking formula instead of your milk without your consent. Like. They're constantly touching your kid and borderline kidnapping them and they're just like "oh my gosh look how flustered you are, what a good protective mom 🥰" meanwhile you're contemplating actual fucking murder

#i feel like i already made this post but THAT COMIC has me feeling some kinda way #im not saying i found it on a site called scribd buuuuuuut.... #yandere spiderverse #yandere x reader

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

to me the magicians is largely a show about how terrible it is to be 23 both in the sense that it sucks so bad and in the sense that 23-year-olds suck so bad (confidential to 23-year-olds reading this: not you, dear, but also, check back once you've gone through your saturn return), so it's very rare that any of the characters do anything that actually bothers much less upsets me because i'm like, the terribleness is the point and much of the joy for me. but we all have our individual pressure points so for the sake of the historical record here is a complete list of times the characters in the magicians do something i dislike:

julia: in the pilot when she tells quentin "you're good at so many things, just pick one!" to me that is not only the meanest thing julia ever says or does to quentin it is maybe the meanest thing anyone ever does to anyone at any point on the entire show. like julia i love you more than life itself but can we maybe let a bitch live

quentin: there's a specific quality to the all-in earnest dorkiness with which he approaches the quest that i just cannot handle. it makes me want to walk into the screen and place my hands on his shoulders and look him in the eye and say "this is why you had no friends in high school." like at a certain point your inability to read the room becomes my problem and that's the point at which even though i would very literally lay down my life for yours i cannot even look you in the eye

alice: when she's super obnoxious and condescending to harriet about signing/communication/etc. this one gets an asterisk because i actually think that scene is good writing in that it's in character with what we know of alice and her flaws to be super weird about a deaf person and i think she is meant to come across as unpleasantly in the wrong and i like it when a show gives its protagonists such genuine types of behavioral errors. but it does make me viscerally uncomfortable to watch

josh: one of the less sung about hate crimes near the end of season 4 is josh chuckling to himself about how margo thinks she's mad at him but really she's mad at herself because he like superhumanly divines her emotional architecture because they've banged twice or whatever. this one gets an asterisk in the opposite direction because i feel like everything i (a known proponent of Josh Rights) enjoy about josh is down to the joshness of josh and everything i don't enjoy about josh is bad writing fueled by heterosexuality brain poison so it feels like i'm holding it against him unfairly when actually the real josh would not do that and it's just that the writers are bad. but that moment makes me feel like we need to send him to the guillotine immediately so on the list it goes

kady: kady doesn't matter enough to rise to the level of bothering me. sorry kady i love the version of you that exists in the universe written by writers who gave a shit

margo: i feel like i had one for margo at some point but i can't remember what it was. i guess i wish she were a little less anti-democracy once established upon the throne but i also read a lot of that as an outgrowth of her habit of being the tough bitch partly because she's worried about eliot getting his ass killed so.... eh

penny: literally nothing ever not even once not even for a second. i tried to think of one and i couldn't. and like i know that he does things on screen that are morally bad or simply not nice or whatever. but i'm like physically incapable of being upset by penny he brings me too much joy it cannot be cancelled out by ethical qualms or empathy for anyone else i'm a simple woman i see his beautiful face and i am at peace. he deserves to be a huge asshole to everyone all the time for no real reason, as a treat and also because it's soooooo funny. i would not want him to change a thing

eliot: ok like literally mind your business about margo's bush this is not being an ally!!!!!!

#the magicians

[tinynightmarewoman]

Can I just... take my little 5:30 in the morning brain and just... fucking explain how much I viscerally hate the whole 3 way marital dispute going on in HOA?

Don't get it twisted, I know it adds to characters and adds tension that can make or break things or even kill people and all that... fancy shit... There is totally a place for the story line that is not my issue, but my God does it make me want to grind my fucking teeth in to a fine powder that I can snort!!

It is so overdone in my opinion, every other conversation between Eric, Racheal or Nick has something to do with that fucking love triangle and its just not worth it after awhile. It was interesting at the start, I mean our first introduction to Rach and Nick was them trying get down to pound town then OH SHIT Nick the husband is showing up and that was actually kind of interesting and I can partially get behind that... Its when it drags this dead horse down in to the ruins that fucks me up!!!

Like come the fuck on, you've just got jumped by the enemy, you've fallen God knows how far in to this endless abyss and now there's fucking parasitic vampire alien creature beyond human comprehension trying to bite you on the arse! What's that? You're still bitching about your loveless marriage? GET A GRIP!!!

There's vampire at the door looking for their next portion of Kentucky Fried Kolchek, Clarice is getting jiggy with the parasite in the corner and Basri is still out there swinging his dick about with his finger on the trigger and you're upset because Racheal hasn't given you head in a year??!! YOU'RE ABOUT TO FUCKING DIE!!! I came here for alien parasite vampire horror, not a scuffed episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians Iraq style!!

You can each other killed over this fucking dispute like come on its not that deep, you have bigger issues like, once again, ALIEN VAMPIRES!!!

I do have a deep appreciation for this game and I completely understand how someone can somehow tolerate or even like it but fuck me, just have a threesome you morons!!

The real housewives of Iraq type shit

#posting this to my loyal 2 followers #rant #the dark pictures anthology #dark pictures anthology house of ashes #house of ashes #dark pictures anthology #the dark pictures anthology house of ashes #Please don't insult me I'll cry #HOA

[drewsbuzzcut]

Something For The Pain And Something So I Sleep

mat barzal x model!fem!reader

a visceral in doses blurb

warnings: slight angst, tito getting traded

You were barely finishing washing your face when you heard the rapid, loud knocks on your front door. You weren’t expecting anyone over and it was late at night, so you really had no clue who it could be. Quickly drying your face, you hurry to the door and when you open it, you’re surprised to see a distressed mat. He immediately walks in once the door is opened and starts pacing. His hands are buried in his hair, his face is flushed, and his bottom lip is tucked between his teeth. You see him shut his eyes tightly while his mouth keeps opening and closing, but before you could ask what was wrong, he was already ranting, “tito is leaving!”

You can tell that his breathing is heavy just by the way his chest is rapidly rising and falling. His eyes are watery; he was about to start crying. You were extremely confused because he hadn’t called you before he made his way over- not that it mattered, and when you talked to him earlier today, he seemed perfectly fine. You walk up to him and place your hands on his cheeks, trying to get him to calm down by having him focus on your face.

“Tito is gone! I don’t even know how to process this! I- I- I don’t know what to do,” he keeps blurting out.

“Barzy,” you try to get his attention.

“I can’t believe he’s gone,” he says.

“Barzy!” You try again.

“He’s my best friend! It’s going to feel so weird now,” he continues.

“Maty!” You finally get him attention.

His breathing is erratic and his face is even more red. The tears that were once filling his eyes are now flowing down his cheeks. The tear tracks left behind are enough to break your heart. You have never seen mat so upset, and you have never even seen him cry. This was new to you. Hell, all of this was new. You had only been dating for a little over a month, so you really didn’t know how to handle this situation. All you knew you needed to do was give him a hug. A hug that hopefully dulled out any of the pain he was feeling. When you pull back from the hug, he has his eyes closed like he’s afraid of you seeing him cry.

“Babe,” you say while guiding his head to lean on your chest, holding onto him for dear life.

“I’m sorry for just showing up,” he apologizes.

“No need to be sorry. You know you can come over at anytime.”

You can still tell that he has a lot more that he needs to get off his chest, so you drag him to your restroom and sit him on the closed toilet, letting him have the chance to rant while you finished up your nighttime skincare routine.

“Start from the beginning and tell me everything because I’m really confused,” you tell him as you start applying your serums and moisturizers.

“Beau got traded,” he mumble dejectedly.

You freeze. You were not expecting that, but mat’s mumbles from your entry way make a lot more sense now. You turn to face mat and he looks so sad. You let your hand rub his head, hoping to soothe him.

“He’s going to Vancouver, and I don’t know this just doesn’t feel real,” he adds.

“Oh my god. I can’t believe that. That’s insane,” you give your thoughts.

“Yeah. He still had like a year left in his contract with the isles. I don’t know how they could just trade him,” he’s starting to get bothered rather than sad.

“I’m sorry, babe. I know it sucks, but it’s business and I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I need you to know that these things happen,” you say as coherent as possible as you’re brushing your teeth.

“It’s a shit business. He has to pick up his whole life in one day. It’s not fair.” He blurts.

“I’ve spent so much time with him. We’ve gone through so many milestones and lessons together; I don’t know how to adjust to him not being here. It sounds silly, but it’s how I feel,” he finishes.

You nod your head, silently agreeing with how he feels. You know there’s not much you can say, so you just reassure him.

“It’s not silly. Your feelings are valid, and I’m thankful that you’re comfortable enough to share them with me,” you state as you finish off your routine with some lip balm. You then move to stand in front of mat; his hands going straight to rub the backs of your thighs while yours caress his cheeks.

“Thank you for listening. I hope I didn’t ruin your night,” mat says with his head down, feeling bad that he just barged in without warning.

“I already told you, I don’t care that you’re here. I’m glad, actually,” you let him know before you start applying lip balm to his own lips. He sometimes forgets to use lip balm, and the way he was biting his lips in nervousness was even more of a reason for him to be wearing some.

“How about… you stay with me tonight,” you offer hesitantly. Like you said, everything was still fresh in this relationship. You didn’t want to push any boundaries and make him uncomfortable. If he did end up spending the night, this would be the first time you slept together.

“Are you sure? Don’t feel like you have to because I came over in a bad state,” he says.

You shake your head and lean down to kiss his lips.

“Stay the night, please,” you beg. You want him to know that you’re there for him, always.

He nods his head and stands up, waiting for you to guide him into your room.

“Is it okay if I sleep in my underwear since… I don’t have any clothes?” He questions, cheeks blushing.

You let out a small giggle at his bashfulness and tell him that it was fine.

You go around your apartment making sure everything was shut down and that your cat had food and water for the night. When you got back to your room, mat was already tucked under the sheets, blanket all the way up to his chin. He looked childlike. The moment your body hit the bed, he was reaching for your hand to leave kisses on your knuckles. You both laid side by side, letting the dark and silent space bring you down from the long day you’ve both had.

“Did you get to say goodbye?” You ask the question that you had been wondering about the answer to.

“Yeah. Briefly,” he mumbles. You just nod in response.

You let a few minutes pass and then you tell him to turn on his side so that his back is facing you, and you spoon him. You feel his body melt like all his worries and fears evaporated into the air. You press kiss after kiss onto the back of his neck. You just wanted to be close to him. Your hand strokes up and down his chest, and when you feel his breath even out, you’re finally at peace. It doesn’t take you long for your body to get heavy and for sleep to pull you under. One last peck to mat’s bare shoulder blade, and you’re out for the night. 

#mat barzal #mat barzal blurb #mat barzal fanfiction #mat barzal fic #mat barzal fluff #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal smut #nhl imagine #nhl fic #new york islanders

[ahiddenpath]

Digimon Adventure 02: The Beginning

I just got home from seeing the Japanese audio/English sub. This is not a review, and I doubt I'll feel the same way about it in a few days, because I'm all up in my emotions and I haven't had a think on it. So here is nothing more or less than my visceral, 100% subjective reaction.

Extreme spoilers beneath the cut, spoilin spoilin all day long. Also cussing and blaspheming, apparently I like to keep it classy.

My head is a boiling vat of pudding.

As the film ended, someone screamed, "Toei why you gotta do us like that?!" Someone else yelled, "Jesus Christ I did not need that in my life." As we filed out, another gem: "They had a digital god in this one, and they still didn't unfuck Kizuna." (That last one, I think, while funny, was not relevant. This wasn't about the older kids, they had their turn and several more, lmao).

Some notes:

-Genuinely I was not prepared for a horror. Or child abuse. I love horror games! I watch them nearly daily! Did you know I have only once been more upset/disturbed by a horror video game than I was by this movie?

Did people take their kids to this? Like, that seems totally reasonable to me, taking your kid to digimon!!! Jesus cHRISt!!!!

-I thought my bar of, "I want to see the 02 kids grown up and interacting," was so, so low. I thought my bar could not be lower. But this was Lui's story, not theirs. And this is Toei's story, not mine, so I have to accept that... They wrote what they wanted to. But yeah, the bar I thought was low was not cleared.

-SOMEONE HELP ME, Himekawa is older than Lui. Himekawa's group, they were the first Chosen. Right??? Does the time line not shake out here??? Himekawa was probably about 10/11 when she was Chosen, and she's a full ass adult in Tri??? So, like, I guess the question is, how much older is her group than Lui at age 4? Are they at least 6 years older???? But- God what age would that make- God damn let me get the chart. Shit, I'm lost. Help??????

Shit I liked:

-Lui's second birthday scene

Not the original scene where Lui meets Ukkomon. This is the second birthday, his 8th birthday, where they sit in a dark room full of presents and treats. Ukkomon mentions Lui's parents and friends. They enter the room and proceed to not say a single ducking word while Ukkomon and Lui talk and talk and talk, and it is the creepiest and most atmospheric shit I have seen. Holy shit!!!!

Obviously, the audience already knows shit is fucked up with Ukkomon, but at this point, ooooooooooooooooo baby that tension is HIGH.

-Power in the hands of children

Ukkomon is, like, seconds old when he meets Lui. Lui is 4 and extremely disenfranchised, even for a 4-year-old. Lui wishes for what he doesn't have. Ukkomon devotes his whole self to those wishes.

What happens when a 4 year old meets a baby genie? When that much power is in the hands of the innocent?

You don't want to know, trust me. Lowkey wish I didn't know!!! Christ on a bike!

As much as we love digimon and the Chosen and all of that, it's always been messed up how much power they have, and how much responsibility. It's so much pressure, it's so high stakes! It was really cool to see Toei explore how sideways all of this could go, literally at any moment.

-A few character moments

Honestly that part where a girl is chatting up Ken and Wormmon is visibly pissed is, like, my favorite thing in this movie. Oh! Also I loved seeing the international Chosen, that was so great. The gut scream of WALLACE/WILLIS in the theater when he appeared!!!!!!

Bonus:

My husband said he liked how there was a command center in Imperialdramon's head. I think that was actually some kind of... plane??? Made by Ukkomon??? I have no idea. You know, the place where Ken and Daisuke are accused of flirting.

Stuff I didn't like

-It was half flash back

I'm being a little harsh here, because stuff other than flashbacks happened in the first 46 minutes, but... I checked my phone after the final flashback (not counting Lui jumping into Ukkomon in the end). I was 46 minutes into a roughly 90 minute film. I'm not against flashbacks in principle, and I tend to like new characters, but... This just wasn't what I hoped for in a movie about the 02 kids. I accept that this is 100% subjective.

-It was too damned fucked up for my tastes

Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeesus H Christ!!!!!

Okay, so first of all, I generally am of the opinion that a lot of recent media has substituted trauma for substance. It's easy to make an audience pity/relate to/feel protective of a character by showing them suffer.

Lui wetting himself was so disturbing for me- in children, that's often a sign of ongoing abuse. I could easily be reading into it, but that combined with the range of age of his bruises (and he had more fresh contusions, too, they start red and turn purple and brown and eventually a yellow green) hinted that this wasn't some one off occasion caused by a sudden spike of stress. That was Lui's life. And he really might have frozen to death that night, if not for Ukkomon.

In a way, if I'm right and not just reading into things, this scene was well done. But also, like... I just don't enjoy the substitution of trauma for gradually making us care about a character and understand what they've been through. It seems like some kind of heavy handed short cut, and it usually has the opposite effect on me- thrusting me out of the narrative and making me distrustful of it.

Or maybe I'm just distancing myself, because I genuinely get so upset.

And don't even get me started on the scene where Ukkomon dissolves. I was not ready for that shit. It was just too much for me, I'm sensitive, lmao!

-I'm not sure what I think of the Chosen reacting to Lui's story

I kind of felt like the Chosen were oddly hard on Lui? They weren't actually, in reality they encouraged him to find a resolution with Ukkomon and reminded him that relationships go two ways.

But, like. Could someone have, like... Idk I was really waiting for someone to cry or hug Lui or reassure him or something? Instead it was like, "Poor Ukkomon. He tried so hard and you relied on him too much!"

And my visceral reaction to that was, "UKKOMON KILLED AT LEAST ONE OF LUI'S PARENTS AND MADE THEM MEAT PUPPETS FOR YEARS, JESUS!!!! AND YOU WANT LUI TO GO SEE UKKOMON AGAIN?!?!?!?!?" Like, that whole thing was literally a nightmare??? But Ukkomon was an actual whole ass baby god, and then again, as my husband put it, "Ukkomon did what CPS wouldn't." Lui needed help, stat.

I'm gonna need some time to sort how I feel about this. I can say that, as I watched, I felt like the emotional tone was really off for the last half of the film. All I could think about was the horror, and any time someone criticized Lui, or even told him to go see Ukkomon, I was just like- MEAT. PUPPET!!!! MEAT!!! PUPPET!!!! (Did those kids that Ukkomon made Lui's friends also die?!?!?!). Literally, snow was falling and the Chosen were playing, and my head was like, MEAT. PUPPET!!!!

There's no walking back that emotion, at least not in a 40 some minute window. Not for me, personally. I'm probably going to have nightmares. If I knew going in that this was a horror, I'd be fine with that. But gdi I though I'd see my blorbos having good times mixed with a plot.

Instead, nightmares.

-Lui's final scene with his mother

Lui tells himself, "This time, when I go back in time... I won't rely on Ukkomon for everything" (paraphrasing). He sees his mother inside his memory of his 4th birthday. He says to her, roughly, "Lui loves you, please remember that."

And magically, the mom is kind to him that night.

Now, to be fair, even disastrous relationships can have good times. Maybe it would have been just that night that was better. But there was this feeling of, "Oh, if I just talked to my mother when I was 4 years old and horrifically abused, it would have been different."

That just isn't how that works. If I had to guess, the film is just supporting communication. But god, don't ever point back to the child victim like that. Too bad that 4 year old doesn't know how to communicate with his abusive caregiver! Things might have been different!!!!!

I'm sensitive to this kind of thing, so it's totally possible I'm fixating too much on this or blowing up the importance of this moment. But yeah, not a good emotional reaction to that.

In summary: this was not the film I wanted. In fact, it's a film that will stick on me like a burr, but like. In a bad way? But also it did have some killer ideas. Ukkomon has to be one of the most interesting things to hit Adventure in years. So much power in the hands of an innocent, so disastrous so very fast.

My brain is still pudding. Time for some nightmares. Good night, I hope the film didn't distress you if you saw it! And my sympathies if you took your children, the biggest of oofs (how could you have known??? You couldn't have).

#spoilers #digimon spoiler #digimon spoilers #digimon #digimon adventure 02 #digimon adventure 02 the beginning #02tb spoilers #02tb #hidden reacts #reaction #faves

[lily-orchard]

Do you think I’m fucked up for not caring about certain problematic media? I find it bizarre, sometimes gross, and don’t understand it, but I don’t really get upset about it.

I bring this up cause I sent you an ask and got bombarded with people telling me you wrote a “pedofic” with no evidence. I don’t believe them, but I thought it was really silly that they were THAT mad about it. That I’M a bad person for not caring if you allegedly wrote some weird fanfic.

With the most recent video you posted about the cannibal game, I felt a little bad that I wasn’t offended by problematic media, but still couldn’t get myself to care. Does that make me a bad person?

Not really. The internet has flooded people with garbage so much that most people are desensitized to it.

I mean, I was around for Wizards of Waverly Place, Frozen, and Gravity Falls, so when the cannibal game went "fooled you, it's all incest" I didn't really have much of a reaction because like... I've seen all this shit before.

I think people get this idea in their head that you have to have the outrage meter at 11 all the time to show the rest of the internet that you care the most. But the truth is, that's what disgusting people want you to do. I mentioned in the video itself: Proshippers orient their entire lives around getting reactions from the "antis" who live in their heads rent free.

I have a hard time being viscerally outraged by most things because being on the internet from the age of 9 means there's nothing people do I haven't seen before.

I've always thought it was very telling that my stalkers get so angry about an imaginary fic, yet AO3 is flooded with child porn. Absolutely flooded. If even a fraction of the energy spent whining about this fic they made up was directed at AO3, fandom would become a much safer place for minors.

Which is sad.

[eisforeidolon]

Correct me if I’m wrong. But Dean had way more visceral reactions when Kevin and Charlie died. Hell, became functioning alcoholic when Bobby died. But Dean sitting defeated for a few seconds at the end of an episode, and then basically moved on by the start of the next. Is Dean so in love. People really making shit up in their heads.

You're not wrong, it's that simple.

They take a few seconds from canon, write reams upon reams of "meta" and fanfic dissecting and emphasizing how ~*significant*~ it all is in light of the true underlying story of SPN. Over and over and over again, they laser focus in on little nothing moments they can twist to fit their preset agenda while dismissing everything else. So in their heads, it's this huge obvious thing that overshadows all - because it's all they ever pay attention to. So they really don't understand when canon treats all of those moments as the literal couple of seconds that actually happened instead of the epic lovelorn romance they entirely made up in their own heads.

To pretend that Dean was more torn up about Castiel and therefore in lurve? You first have to ignore how absurd it is to say that you can't feel significant grief over someone who is "just" a friend. Then you have to ignore basically ... fucking everything ... about the intensity of his relationship to Sam. After that? You have to ignore how he reacted when Kevin died, when Charlie died, when John died. You have to ignore that his upset in season 7 wasn't just about Castiel, but about Bobby. You have to ignore that his upset in season 13 wasn't just about Castiel, but Mary and even Crowley. You have to ignore that his upset in 15x19 was just as much about literally everyone else on the planet being wiped out of existence because God was out to punish him and Sam personally, not just Castiel. Finally, you have to ignore that Sam was the one still really thinking about missing Castiel and Jack during their post-apocalyptic lives, and that when Dean died and Bobby told him Castiel was in heaven? Dean was more interested in reuniting with his car while he waited for Sam.

#destiew #destihellers #anonymous #askboxery

[themattress]

Digimon Survive: All Endings Ranked

#5. Bad Ending - I’m sorry, but why exactly was this a thing? Why did the game’s developers feel the need to program this option into the game? It occurs if you choose to not return to the Digital World in Chapter 8, and as a result we see Takuma doom both worlds because he suddenly decides to pull a Ryou and become a cowardly Momma’s Boy. Look, what made sense for Ryou’s character makes no sense for Takuma’s character. Takuma was not set up to be the bad guy, at any point in the story, so for him to just do such a drastic 180 turn comes completely out of nowhere. This ending’s “bad”...but not in the way a Bad Ending should be.

#4. Wrathful Ending - So I didn’t actually unlock the Wrathful Route as a possibility when playing the game. Instead, I looked it up on Youtube...which guaranteed that I plan on continuing to not unlock it when playing the game! The main story trajectory isn’t done badly, not in the slightest, but I just can’t with it, it is way too viscerally upsetting for me. Aoi, fucking AOI, is where I draw the line at enduring a character’s mental and emotional suffering and ultimately death, especially when the game goes as hard as humanly possible with it as always. And the actual ending is kind of shit by tacking on a hopeful note in a dystopian scenario where it is so clearly useless and not going to amount to anything in the grand scheme of things. This route is depressing; the ending should have run all the way with that.

#3. Harmony Ending - Textbook bittersweet ending. Not everything works out perfectly with the fate of the two worlds and not everyone survives, but the total doom and gloom portrayed in the prior two endings is averted and the hopeful note actually feels earned this time. And as far as the route before the ending goes, as horrible as I feel about what befalls Miu I honestly like seeing Kaito become a straight-up villain, since it feels true to his character and how it would spiral out of control if he lost his little sister. And Piedmon / Boltboutmon...c’mon, how can you not love him getting to be the Final Boss? It’s the role he was born to play!

#2. Truthful Ending - The Digimon Sovereign enter the picture, everything that had been built to in the plot since the beginning receives proper pay-off, and everyone survives and is able to live happily ever after. Every game like this needs this kind of ending as an option.

#1. Moral Ending - But despite that, I feel like the Moral Route and its ending is the most natural and dramatically satisfying one. The journey of survival wasn’t without loss, there is no redemption for the Master who frankly works better as a pure villain, and there’s this line:

I rest my case.

#Digimon #Digimon Survive #Opinion #Comparison #This has been a PSA

[almost-a-class-act]

For @lamialamia who suggested webgott for the aging-related prompt: Their first “get off my lawn” moment.

Did you want more gardener!Lieb? Because this is how you get more gardener!Lieb.

--

When Joe turns onto their street in his cab, he spots David at once. It has nothing to do with any romantic notions of being able to pick him out anywhere, and everything to do with the fact that he is kind of hard to miss, standing in the yard and gesticulating wildly.

Joe pulls onto the narrow patch of crumbling asphalt next to their house and gets out, assailed by the sound of David shouting the moment he gets the door open.

“Hey!” he calls, hurrying into the yard. He lowers his voice as he approaches, glancing around at the windows of nearby houses. “What’s the matter with you? We’re on thin ice around here as it is.”

This is because David had played a Bob Dylan record at the loudest possible volume every night for a month and Mrs. Whitely across the street had assumed that he was a teenager with parents who never laid down the law, rather than a forty-five-year-old man whose boyfriend mostly worked evenings.

Not that Joe is keeping a tally of which of them annoys the neighbours more.

“Those damn kids rode their bikes through the yard,” David says, pointing at a gaggle of pre-teens just disappearing around the end of the street.

“Little shits,” Joe mutters. He hadn’t had a bike to ride through anyone’s yard as a kid, but even if he had, he’s sure he wouldn’t have. Probably. The kids these days have no manners – that’s the real problem.

“Joe,” David says, turning to look at him in dismay. “Your irises.”

Joe blinks at him, and then turns around to look. Sure enough, there are bike treads directly through his patch of carefully tended irises, now churned up and flattened. It sends a flare of annoyance through him, though it’s much less visceral in its intensity than it once might have been.

“Shit.” It might be too late to replant them, though he will probably be able to save some of these ones. He mulls it for a moment before glancing over at David, who is watching him like he’s worried Joe might be more upset than he’s letting on.

“Is that why you were yelling at those kids like they lit the house on fire?” he asks.

“Yes,” David says. “You spent so much time on those. I watched you put them all in the ground.”

Ah. It’s a little sweet, if Joe were the type to go in for that sort of thing. David's agitation makes his own lower-key reaction more noticeable, and he wonders if they're rubbing off on each other at last, or if maybe he's finally calming the fuck down in his old age.

“They’re just flowers, Web,” he says, reaching out and giving his shoulder a comforting squeeze.

“They’re your flowers,” David replies. His eyes, serious and unerring, are nearly as violet in the dying daylight as the irises that Joe had planted for him.

“I’ll tell you what,” he says. “I can plant new ones. It’ll give me something to do the next time we have a fight.”

“We don’t fight that much anymore,” David protests, though he lets Joe tow him toward the house, somewhat mollified.

“That is definitely relative,” Joe replies.

#webgott #band of brothers #fanfiction #roaroftheninth

[cdyssey]

"When you're the other woman - don't interrupt me, I know what I am - when you're the other woman, you have all these... it's childish, really, but you dream, you know, in another life, any other life, in different circumstances, we'd be together right? You and me? Thing is, Barb, that's true for me - i'd find you and be with you anywhere, anyhow - but I don't... I don't think you would, in the other direction. You have too much to lose. I'd never ask you to give it up for me, but it hurts me anyway. Stupid overactive brain, right? Just making shit up to be mad about. Sorry."

ANON?! HELLO?

You come into my house, and you make me viscerally upset over Melissa Schemmenti at nine o’clock in the morning?????!!!!!!!!

Oh, the fact that she fully accepts that she’s the other woman, even though Barb clearly tries to protest, and the way that you get her self-sacrificing and self-deprecating nature. Of course she’d never ask Barb to give everything up for her.

And, like, on the flip side, you have Barb over there in desperate agony, torn between the beautiful life she has so lovingly carved out for herself and the way that the woman on the other side of the bed sets her soul on fire. She loves the stability of her home. She loves institutions of marriage, of family, and of church. She loves Gerald Howard. She’d never do anything to hurt that dear and precious man.

But then there’s Melissa, and she loves her too. She loves everything about her: her fire truck red hair that sometimes catches in the gaps between her fingers; her big, boisterous laugh; her big, soft belly; the way she always anticipates what Barbara needs; her solidity; her perpetual thereness. Her stomach strangely coils when the divot in the second grade teacher’s v-necks are a little too low. It’s been a long, long time since her husband has made her felt the same way. She holds Melissa in the stolen moments that they get, tracing the knobs on her exposed spine, and often has to hold back tears, thinking about all the ways she’s hurting the two people she loves most.

And here Melissa is, telling her about some of these hurts but being so brave and so resigned about it.

Barbara doesn’t know what she’s done to deserve her.

“I…. I don’t do right by you, Melissa,” she breathes, burying her face in the crook of the younger woman’s neck. She can’t bear to meet her in the eye. “You shouldn’t… have to be in so much pain over me, to constantly wonder your placement in my life.”

(To experience this unholy and unspeakable joy in the margins.)

“I love you,” she finishes, and the three words unfurl from her tongue as easily as a prayer. “Forgive me, though. I know that isn’t enough.”

#maggie blogs #s: abbott elementary #I WEEP #ANON!!!!

[pieshopbarber]

so, I rewatched the 2007 movie and…

my god, it’s so bad. like I genuinely love it for the pure fact that it’s what introduced me to the story in the first place, but holy shit it sucks… like Jesus. and I’m not even talking about how bad the singing is, like it’s not great, but it’s not the worst, but there is so much to dislike about this film. (for reference I’m comparing it to the 1982 pro shoot and the 1979 original)

first off, i understand the gritty and dark aesthetic the film was going for, it’s burton obviously, but they decided the only reason to go about this was to sap all the fun out of it? Like what? One of the best things about the original musical is how darkly comedic it is at times, but the film just saps it all away and it’s no fun. Like one of the funniest scenes of the musical is the whole Pirelli scene, it’s absolutely hilarious, yet somehow, it’s just so bland in the movie. Pirelli is somehow too much and not enough and it sucks. Cutting out the whole back and forth between Todd and Lovett and the crowd during that scene just makes it feel lifeless. The same thing with removing the chair sequence and the ‘GOD THATS GOOD!’s from god that’s good, just makes everything so bland. this grittiness also makes some really awful costume choices, like why the hell is Sweeney wearing a leather jacket in the beginning, where the hell did that come from?? What the hell is Turpin and the Beadle’s costumes? They’re supposed to be rich, fancy snobs, why do they look like their outfits are from a thrift store? Why is everything so poor looking?

also the acting… uggh. First off, Depp and carter are far too young to be Todd and Lovett, and I feel like they’re too conveniently attractive, but also they are just lifeless. For instance, Hearn’s visceral, terrified or Cariou’s heartbroken reaction to discovering that he killed Lucy gets me every freaking time. Compare that to depp just whispering ‘no’ …. Like what the fuck? Excuse me?

also I am still deeply upset by many of the cut stuff, mainly Lucy’s introduction, because her popping out of nowhere during the Johanna intro feels too sudden, and we also miss out on the whole “don’t I know you mister” in the beginning, making when she repeats it before she dies feel less impactful. We also loose the whole her trying to solicit sex, which because her last sane memory was her getting raped, making it that much sadder, which makes her feel less fleshed out. also the amount of shit they cut around Johanna… Jesus Christ. They could have cut the whole Johanna and Anthony plot and it could have been the same. In the original musical, johanna is super capable, she knows what she wants and does stuff to get it. In the film she’s reduced to no more than a mute damsel in destress. Also the movie making it so todd just spares her instead of her running away, infuriates me to no extent. Also we don’t get a resolution for the Antony and Johanna saga. also why did they change the ending so that Toby wasn’t insane? Like you can’t tell me he ain’t a little fucked up from that.

I think the only good thing in my opinion is Allan Rickman as judge Turpin, he slays everything he does (Also the whole ‘you gandered!!!’ Thing is funny as hell.)

I’m exhausted right now, and this movie makes me so angry.

#sweeney todd #sweeney todd the demon barber of fleet street #sweeney todd: the demon barber of fleet street #broadway #musical #musical theatre #mrs. lovett #sondheim #thea #Sweeney Todd 2007 #tim burton #rant

[chaos-and-ink]

i’m back 🤠 9 for the fic asks for either/both fics 🤠🤠🤠

9. What is your favourite line/interaction in your fic? Omg, this is so fun. I'm so excited, I gotta thinkkkk. As Stable As Water:

The answer felt too short but Bucky was too tired to care. He was honestly upset that Brock kept doing this to him but he was too scared to bring it up. He knew it was irrational and it wasn’t anything Brock was doing wrong. Instead, Bucky was just too sensitive and emotional about this kinda shit. It was his own fault he couldn’t control how he felt about this and he didn’t need to hurt Brock by bringing it up. Bucky huffed out a sigh, he’d just have to deal with it.  That’s what love was, anyway. Making sacrifices and all. Bucky wasn’t dumb enough to believe love was all fairy tales and romance, he understood it was much more serious and logistical than that. But at the same time, he wished he could feel those emotions.  The way other people described being in love sounded so visceral and vivid. It was passionate and sensual and deep. But all Bucky ever felt with Brock was a hollow emptiness and a constant push and pull of tension. He figured the tension was what made love love. And maybe they weren’t doing it as well as others, but they still loved each other. It would work out okay, Bucky figured. 

I really love this internal thought process scene because it really does explain where Bucky's mind is. He's trying to make sense of this concept. This thing called love. Brock, in Bucky's mind, isn't doing anything wrong. Everything that's wrong with their relationship is Bucky's fault and because of Bucky's emotions. These feelings he can't control or can't create that put a huge strain on their relationship. I really like the way Bucky thinks when he's trying to process how love works and why it isn't working for him. And in the future chapters, I can't wait to rewrite this scene when Bucky revises his understanding of love after maturing and healing.

You Watched Me Burn:

“So uh, how’d you get the bruises, if you don’t mind me asking? They look real bad.” “Funny story but I actually walked into a door frame,” bucky lied, trying to smile like it was a joke. “I have this bad thing where I’m super clumsy. Uhm. I’m like, anemic or something and low on like all the vitamins or whatever so I get dizzy. Sometimes I knock into shit. And uh, I bruise super easily. It looks so much worse than it is,” he laughed weakly. Steve chuckled. “Oh man, that really sucks. I get dizzy spells a lot too, actually. One time I fell down two flights of stairs and knocked my wrist hard enough I broke the radius and ulna.” “No joke?” Bucky laughed, giggling a bit at the absurd scene his imagination had created. Steve toppling down stairs like a cartoon character.  “Swear on it. My friend, Nat. She laughed her ass off instead of helping me up,” Steve grinned brightly. His smile was infectious and Bucky couldn’t help but mirror it. Even if it hurt his face.

I really like this scene. It's so calming and easy, the words just flow. Also, some fun little extra fact: Steve's lying! He didn't fall because of a dizzy spell he was actually pushed down two flights of stairs. Natasha was not there to help him so he had to drive himself to the hospital later that night He broke his left arm and was unable to tattoo for months while it healed and he stayed home :( Poor guys, they're both just lying to each other about their injuries.

Thanks so much for the assskkk ah, I seriously love these sm. I love sharing all the extra details about my fanfics 💙

#as stable as water #you watched me burn #ask box #writer ask game

[unauthorizedmagicians]

Episode 4 - The World in the Walls

a lot of the commentary for this episode is more serious bc of the nature of this episode so be warned

tw: abuse, addiction, mental illness, anything else this episode covers

i genuinely forgot this happened RIGHT after the end of the last ep w julia lying abt being an addict

this episode was so traumatizing im gonna be so frank. i will be skipping large chunks of it

the windows being weird overblown shit is so dkjfsldkhgd

right forgot the part where they made q out to be kinda racist and then penny calling him out abt it

no cuz julia was so fucking foul for this shit like worst fucking nightmare shit

this ep does remind me how good of actors they are

"i wanted to see the fireworks" gets stuck in my head so often its not even funny

fr makes me think about how people can convince u ur insane and how that eventually leads u to believing it. idk gaslighting and manipulation and shit and like this is not me saying mental illness isn't real this is about abuse and shit

ok but is the jane thing in this ep actually jane doing the dream thing or is it his own brain trying to come up with a way out

not the "these books are my way of getting out of here" followed by "everytime i talk i sound batshit" like SKJLDFGHJDS

bro the fact that that song is the answer to the whole puzzle makes me so viscerally upset

why does he think going to LITERALLY ANYBODY in this hellscape would do anything but push him further down

i will be skipping any and all scenes with his dad tyvm

also the way that "getting better" in this is so similar to how they treat mentally ill people in real life and like irl there is no solution or counterspell or anything to getting rid of people's afflictions but either way the way ppl try to sedate mentally ill people and they think that's them getting better is just a thing i've been ruminating on

the first time outside of the dreamscape being as q yells wake up ooooooooo

its so funny how committed he is to the tape like u don't technically need tape to piece together the pages that's just to make them stick

i wish they brought back q reading parts of the book with reenactments overtop its artistic i like it

fr so funny that hedge witches r like the edgy side of magic or whatever but they r a metaphor for institutionalized poverty or whatever but haha silly leather jacket bondage clothes

skip skip skip hehehe

they all have like unique little boxes that's so silly

ok now for my favorite scene in this whole episode: the light cage!!!

#the magicians #the magicians syfy #quentin coldwater #eliot waugh #alice quinn #kady orloff diaz #margo hanson #penny adiyodi #unauthorized magicians rewatch

[carcharsaur]

I like doing my little rant posts 2 people read so I'm doin it again this year :] this time I finished something way sooner too

fatamoru... took me half a year to get myself to actually read it but well it's a classic and it's good as hell what can I say (spoilers under cut)

gonna link my longass livetweet thread here for posterity so it's not completely lost in the mire

this felt so targeted though it's legit dumbfounding. I went into it only recalling 1 and a halfish spoilers of 1) michel is the MC and 2) he had trans stuff going on and honestly if anything my jumping at shadows and going HUH WAIT ? the whole time knowing that kinda heightened the experience for me early on. I was about to say at first it was hard to know what parts of the story I should really sink my teeth into but I think that was the intended experience... these stories aren't yours etc... the atmosphere and ost especially is also like soooo crazy good I was worried it'd be hard for me to stay focused on this game without voice acting but I was surprised how well it stuck even if some of the sfx are very obviously old and scuffed none of them took me out of it much (this has been a legit issue for me with some games.. the otomate sound library is really scuffed sometimes LOL) and even when the game was going over the same events, in different contexts etc it never started grating on me so that is a huge W. too many fucking games act like you just weren't paying attention when you were reading and it not only pisses me off but it's just so boring. so this avoiding that entirely was really good. GRIPPING. some of it was so edge of my seat I think I played for like 10 or more hours straight I thought I was gonna die but in a good way LMAO I don't think I have anything interesting or poignant to say about the actual story itself other than despite everything I want jacopo dead, I totally get the point about letting go and moving on and a cycle needing to be broken and it was visceral and moving and so real to me. but also. jacopo deserved all that shit. everything else though I'm just sitting there yelling TRUE AS HELL!!!!!! really loud. I love you michel I love you giselle I'm gonna get u outta there morgana. wait I lied. morgana as the white haired girl. it's not fucking fair.... I wanted to save her... I do think 'she' truly did become part of morgana again though, based just on how scared morgana was of didier at the end, at the cries of being called an unholy witch... a fear that only she held, morgana sort of reveled in being a witch in the course of carrying out the cruelty. but the saintly part of her feared that fall, that complete inversion of her self and the hatred it pointed towards her as well... man : ( ........... : (

I could write an essay specifically on the ways I relate to michel to a like genuinely scary degree the overlap made me sick to my stomach in the best way. but honestly I would be a weepy mess at the end of it so I don't wanna do all that. as an aside though apparently the author(s) have said he's "only intersex, not trans" but man I think that's a stupid as hell delineation to make. he's both. he was assigned 'female' at birth and was raised as a woman and chafed against the social role of 'woman'. IF ANYTHING I relate to him more about not necessarily feeling dysphoric/lacking in regard to his genitals on his own but more about the fact that that somehow invalidates his status as a 'man' being something that torments him. it's a topic that overlaps imo. but the fact the game handles it with as much tact as it does while being as old as it is surprised me. though I could see it being still too upsetting for some because the depiction of the trauma is kind of like. viscerally too real almost. when giselle described her abuse... it wasn't even descriptive in the disgusting voyeuristic way it so often is in other places, but the representation of how it just feels to be subject to that was so real that it really really fucked me up... I'M DOING THE THING I JUST SAID I SHOULDN'T AAHHH but well. it's really good. it's like eating a heavy but hearty meal where it's so good but I can feel it sitting in my stomach and the weight of it just makes me groan. does this even make sense anymore. man.

ok a selection of my fav screengrabs to play me off before I continue in such a manner.

GISELLE PUFFED CHEEKS VERY CUTE

#car's 2024 media #MY ONE SINGLE NITPICK I didn't like how gaze-y a lot of the giselle CGs felt especially considering the context but that's about it #well one nitpick other other than. jacopo moments #car talking

[wanderingwriter87]

directors commentary on the first scene from a shape to fill a lack?

so the first scene contains the whole original conceit of the fic - tain has it in his head and julian and garak are ~involved~ and he's trying to sniff it out, and the more julian plays into it, the more he realizes that oh wait maybe -

originally the whole thing was going to be one conversation, but i realized i had started in media res just before julian goes into solitary and then the conversation kind of ran its course and I wanted to show more. so i did the flashback structure for the rest of the conversations... ANYWAY. getting sidetracked

julian is sort of casually cruel to tain by this point, he's tired of using all his energy to keep this awful man alive and now he's outlived his usefulness and julian is done. he speculates that someone has been instructed to allow tain special treatment, and i left that open ended whether the vorta that runs the facility (there's gotta be one to distribute the white, yeah?) has been bought out, either by some old tal shiar ally or maybe even mila. who knows. (beta canon is a mixed bag for me but i absolutely subscribe to the idea that mila also worked for the OO and had at least some resources at her disposal).

tain meanwhile is simply angling to break them up. he knows he's unlikely to survive much longer but he knows julian is someone who could actually become as important to garak as tain himself has been, and that is viscerally upsetting to him. (even worse, he GETS it. julian attractive, devoted to a cause, and quite ruthless when he wants to be - what cardassian could resist?) he's not good at it, but he's trying. he would've had a better shot back during the wire etc but at that point i don't think he had realized how serious it was. (probably still wouldn't have worked bc julian is sooooo stubborn and he would just resort to talking about awful things garak did but julian always processes that shit so fast. he's like

every time because he understands complex morality and manipulation and he's so compassionate and blah blah blah tain would make very little headway but. oh my god would he try)

#gif warn