#bangin' authors

[queers-gambit]

Two to Tango

prompt: the aftermath of Carmy's words seem to rattle him more than you.

pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader pairing: Carmy x Peach

fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear

word count: 5.4k+

note: author still does not want any messages about glorifying toxic relationships. typically, but not always, when someone calls you clingy, it's weaponized and is abusive. this fic is not meant to portray that! it’s meant to show internal agony and the journey to forgiveness - Carmy apologizes 'cause he's actually sorry!

warnings: cursing, reader folds 'cause who wouldn't for the sweet puppy that is Carmy, hurt and comfort, small angst, small fluff, we talk about Mikey a bit, author uses writing as therapy, relationship angst...? barely edited.

part one: God's Plan

browse Clingy Baby collection masterlist here

"It's six in the Goddamn morning!" You raged at your front door, stomping up to it, "Are you dumb in the fucking head!? Who the fuck in their right mind knocks like the Goddamn cops at six in the fucking morning!?"

You whipped it open, the force causing a breeze of air to blow your bedridden hair back and highlight your exhaustion. "Hiya, sunshine," Richie beamed down at you, holding up a paper bag, offering, "donut?"

"Richie!? I know you're not fuckin' stupid, baby boy, so, what the fuck is wrong with you? It's six in the morning on my day off - do you want to give me a reason to punch you? You hate your nose that much?"

He tisked at you mockingly, "Someone's cranky this morning."

"What do you want?"

"You're not gonna invite me in for coffee? I brought us donuts! See? C'mon, Peach," He jostled the bag around with a shit-eating, closed-lip smile. "Dooonuts," he taunted.

You had to pause, count to ten in your head, then sigh through your nose. You offered kindly, "Richie? Would you like to come in for some coffee? Since you kindly brought donuts?"

He grinned, "Awwh, thanks, Peach, thats real nice of yah! Don't mind if I do!"

"Don't call me that," you snapped, leading him into your kitchen. The door shut and locked.

"Oh, someone's touchy."

"What do you fucking want?" You whined, pouring two mugs of hot coffee. "You come bangin' at my door, early ass in the mornin'. You better have a good-ass reason," you slid the mug over the counter he sat at. "Cream or sugar?"

He shook his head, fiddling with the mug for a moment before admitting as you dressed up your own coffee, "Uh, so... It's Carmy."

You paused, taking a slow sip from your mug, waiting for more that wouldn't come. So, you quietly asked, "What about Carmy?"

"He's falling apart."

"O...Kay?"

"Peach," he frowned, "you know that your relationship was the only thing that made sense to him - he's falling apart without you there."

"Okay," you nodded, taking another swallow of hot bean-water.

"That's it? Nothing else to say? Dude's losin' his fuckin' shit, Peach. Okay? Barely leaves the restaurant, h-he's all manic and shit, doesn't stop cookin', isn't gettin' a lotta sleep, and Syd said his clothes are all over the apartment - he's not keeping himself in order."

"So, he needs his mother?"

Richie glared with a clenched jaw, "Not fuckin' funny, Peach."

"I'm not laughing."

"He needs you."

"I'd argue otherwise, he's a grown fuckin' man who doesn't need to be taken care of. Look, if he was man enough to call me a desperate, clingy bitch, he's man enough to deal with the fallout of his words."

"Look, hey, hey, hey, I'm not sayin' he's not in the wrong," he waved his hands, eyes widening, "actually, the exact opposite. We all chewed his ass out when we found out what he fuckin' said, Peach. And look, I've never seen Fak that fuckin' angry."

You semi-pouted your bottom lip, "Really?"

"Fak was ready to strangle Carmy, I think," Richie sighed. "I yelled, Sugar yelled, Fak lost his shit, Syd even cornered him in the office and laid into him..."

"I thought she didn't like me," you whispered.

"She's getting to know you, but she likes you," he assured, "and it's obvious the affect you have on Carmy. We all respect that - "

"Oh, great, so everyone except the one person who needs to respect our relationship - respects it!"

Richie frowned at you, nodding in agreement before admitting, "He's a dumb fuckin' idiot, Peach, we all know that, but the dude is losing it without you."

"Sucks to suck."

"Peach," he groaned, slapping his hands to the counter with exasperation. "Don't you love him?"

"Of course I love him, but I also have this little thing called self-respect! He said some shit - shit he can't ever take back. The fuck I look like going back to him when he's the one in the wrong!? I don't hate myself that much, and despite what he says, I'm not that desperate for love."

"How is talking to the man you love - "

"Richie," you paused him, "your Cousin said a lot of hurtful shit. It's been weeks, okay? He's gonna snap outta it, realize what he's done, and right the wrongs he's committed. I don't need to speed that along in any way, shape, or form - he's a grown man. And I'm a grown woman, I don't have to fall to anyone's beck-and-call, he can figure his own shit out."

"I know - look, it's been fuckin' weeks of us dealin' with him losin' his fuckin' mind!" Richie snapped. "We tried to respect that you wanted distance and time, we really did, but he's losin' it, Peach, more than he's lost it before. Okay? I'm concerned about him, more than I was when the shit with Mikey went down..."

You sighed and leaned on your kitchen counter, wiping your fingers over your eyes to pinch the bridge of your nose after. "Okay, okay," you paused, sighing again, blinking as you looked at Richie, "so, what would you like me to do?"

He pouted dramatically, "Talk to him? Please?"

"To say... What?"

"I don't know, you guys can work that out together, but he's miserable, Peach. Just talk to him, just..." He sighed, shaking his head, "I know it's not fair to ask of you, but he's slippin' off the deep end. You're all he knows, all that makes sense to him, and with you gone..." His eyes turned red as he held back his tears, "I-I'm not sayin' he's gonna do anythin', Peach, but everythin' with Mikey's still so fresh... I just - I can't go through this again. Can't lose another Berzatto."

You frowned, understanding now why he appeared so frazzled.

"Carmy's not Mikey, Richie, okay?" You reminded him softly, reaching for his hand; leaving your extended to reach him, "And you're not gonna lose any more of us, you hear me?" You gave a squeeze, "I'll talk to him."

"Really?"

"I will," you assured softly, seeing the single tear drop from his waterline when he bowed his head and sniffled harshly. "Hey, Richie...? Do you, maybe, wanna bring some flowers to Mikey today? Think you wanna visit?"

He shrugged, "Maybe..."

"Maybe it'll be nice," you assured calmly. "It rained a few days ago, so, the ground won't be too soggy anymore, but the grass will be lush and green - hydrated and shit."

"Right," he chuckled, nodding, "yeah, okay, maybe that'll be nice, yeah, you're right."

"Maybe Carmy could use a visit, too."

"He won't go."

You nodded, "I know, but sometimes it's nice to just have the offer."

Richie agreed, downing the last of his black coffee. "All right," he cleared his throat, "let's go - you wearin' that?"

"What?"

"You gonna wear that? To go talk to Carmy?"

"It's not even seven in the morning!"

"He's at the restaurant," Richie shrugged. "Dude doesn't leave. C'mon, he needs a nap or somethin'."

You groaned, knowing he wouldn't leave unless you left with him. So, you got ready quickly while he sat at your desktop computer; playing Facebook's FarmVille - the same you left your little cousins to play when they needed distracted. He was enraptured by the adorable virtual sheep, laughing to himself as he learned the ropes of the game; and when you were ready, you had time to fill a to-go tumbler of coffee while he signed off.

When you arrived at The Beef, it was still closed for the morning prep; and inside, chaos rained in a fury of angry voices. You listened to Carmy snap at Marcus about something petty, going as far as to slap a pastry out of his hand as they argued in one another's faces with ignited passion.

"Ooookay," you moved through the kitchen and got between the two men, hands on Carmy's chest, "that's enough, Chef, hey, hey, hey, c'mon, walk away - just walk away, Carmy, don't do this. Hey, hey, don't do this, c'mon, just step off - walk away with me, please. Please, Carmy, hey, hey, step off, walk away with me, please."

"Fuck you doin' here, Peach?" He asked with red, swollen eyes. He looked sullen; pale between the angry red blotches to his skin, bags under his tired eyes, looking worn out and thinner than you remembered.

"Yeah, hey, hey, we'll talk about that, c'mon, outside, outside, outside," you directed him, sighing at the sight of the splattered pastry you were forced to step over. "I'm so sorry, Marcus," you whispered, seeing him nod and wave you off as you and Carmy pushed outside into the alley.

The door shut behind you, making Carmy snarl, "What the fuck, Peach - "

"No, I think that's better asked to you," you snapped. "The hell's wrong with you? Yellin' at Marcus like that? You know how rude it is to slap shit outta anyone's hand?"

He paced in anger, wiping a hand down his face; circling his mouth with his fingers, eyes ringed with red, hair greasy and tossed in a mess. His pants looked baggy, his shirt wrinkled, stained, and dirty with sweat marks.

"What're you doin' here?" He asked in a pant, hands going to his slender hips, head shaking as his tear-filled eyes avoided yours.

"Carmy, we need to talk."

"No shit," he breathed, scoffing after and widening his pace.

"Hey, Carmy, hey, hey," you reached for him, taking both his wrists in your grasp so he had to face you. "I need you to pause for me, please, hey," you stepped in his way when he tried to move. "Carmy, you're no good to anyone when you're like this - least of all yourself. So, I need you to talk - "

"You left," he panicked, pulling back to start pacing again. "You left - you left me. We got in a fight and you left, you fucking left. You walked away and you left me."

"Carmy, we got in more than a fight," you sighed. "You lashed out at me, then turned avoidant, and I don't linger where I'm not wanted."

"How can you think that?" He demanded, still pacing. "That you're not wanted by me? That you're not welcome, what? In my life? At my side? With me? Baby - of course, you are!"

"You didn't exactly make me feel any different," you pointed out sharply. "Carmy, can you please fucking pause for me so we can talk this out - "

"I know I fucked up," he ranted to himself, huffing and puffing as his emotion strangled him. "I know I did, I kept - I couldn't - I fucked up. I know I did. I couldn't get my head outta my ass," he listed, pacing as he panted when panic took hold of his being, "and I hurt you, and it was like I had to keep hurting you because I couldn't be alone in what I felt and I couldn't exactly figure out what the fuck I was feeling - I just needed you to hurt, too."

"Carmy," you sighed patiently.

"And I couldn't stop, I just kept going, and when I realized how bad I made it, I couldn't fucking stop - I needed y-yo-you t-to know what I felt, but I couldn't find the words. I-I hate that I did that, I-I fucking hurt you and I made this so much worse than it ever had t-to be, and I fucking know, Peach, okay? I know you're not clingy, you were just loving me. Y-You were loving me, you were using your own love languages, and I felt y-you so fuckin' close to me, and freaked out - I just - I just don't know why. I just - I panicked, I couldn't stop whatever I felt, and I'm so sorry," he breathed, shaking his head, wiping his cheeks as the tears started. "I-I-I'm so sorry, Peach, I couldn't control myself and I-I hate that I hurt you, and I know I don't deserve your understanding, but I just - I couldn't stop - "

"Carmy," you stepped directly in his footpath; needing to seize hold of his swollen biceps to catch his movements as he all but barreled right into you, "I need you to breathe."

"Nah, I'm okay - "

"No, you're not," you spoke sternly, shaking your head. "Baby," you eased your tone to a softer tone, seeing a glimmer of hope spark in his baby blues, "I need you to take a breath and remain in the present with me, okay? Just stand here with me," you watched as he blinked a couple of times; reaching out to hold your waist tentatively. "And stay in the present, okay? Stay here with me."

"I'm so sorry, Peach," he whispered, stepping closer so he could feel your breasts against his chest; caging you with his arms. "I'm so fuckin' sorry, I didn't - I didn't know what the fuck I was even trying to fight with you about. You're not clingy - you're not any of the things I said, I didn't mean it - any of it."

"Calling me desperate?"

"I didn't mean any of it."

"A bitch?"

"Please," he whispered, bringing you in closer so he could rest his forehead on yours. "Don't repeat it, I know what I said, and I'm so fucking sorry for all of it. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I'm goin' crazy without yah, Peach. I need my best girl, and I don't deserve you, but I fuckin' need you." He sniffled, pulling back to caress your cheek, whispering, "I need you, Peach, you're the only thing that I know - the only thing I can understand, that makes sense to me. I think I just felt stressed and overwhelmed, I wasn't sure what to do - I couldn't find the words, I'm so sorry."

You nodded slowly, "I think we can work through this."

"I don't deserve you."

"Maybe not, but you have me anyway," you whispered, bringing his forehead to your own again. "But you can't do this again, taking anger out on me when I haven't done anything."

"Never again," he sighed, now nestling into your neck for comfort; arms tightening so you were the closest you could be with your head bent to keep his head caressed with yours.

"I don't think we can say 'never', but we can make an effort to leave work stress at work, right?" You whispered softly, letting one around coil around him to keep him close; the other caressing his jaw. "You don't get to treat me like that," you reminded him, "because I'm on your side, Carmy, I'm not the enemy."

"I know," he squeezed you tight.

"And the people doing their jobs are not the enemy," you smirked.

"I know," he chuckled lightly. "I owe Marcus an apology..."

"I'm sure you owe it to the others, too," you mused, holding his cheek as you turned your head to kiss his forehead. "Promise me we're done with that reactive bullshit. It doesn't make navigating a relationship easier on us."

"We're done, we're so fuckin' done with that shit," he whispered, deflating into your embrace as you held him close. "I'm so sorry, baby. I really am."

"I know," you comforted softly. "I forgive you."

"I don't deserve it."

"Hey, hey, this self-deprecating stunt has to end, too. We've gotta go forward with at least some confidence if we're gonna figure this out together."

He nodded, pulling back but keeping hold of your waist. "I am confident about this... About you - about us."

"Hmm?" You gently pushed a few stray curls from his forehead.

"Move in with me - officially."

Your face contorted in mild disappointment, "Oh, Carmen - "

"No, no," he rushed, sighing as his hand flattened on your jaw and cheek again, "just listen to me. I've wanted to ask you for a long time, okay? I've wanted this for - like - fucking years. Hear me? I just," he sighed, "I wasn't sure how to ask. I want this for us, I want us to be together, okay? Officially. I-I want us living together, Peach, okay? I want to come home and just - I want you there. I want all of you," he frowned, tears swelling again, "and all your shoes in the foyer, hair in the shower drain, perfume on the counter, and every-single-way you know how to love me. I was wrong to say you were clingy - and everything else I said. Baby, the last couple weeks, I've felt so fucking empty, so lonely and - just - cold. I've been cold without you. I need you, Peach, I need you with me, and I need you to be exactly you - no holding back. Because you're exactly who I need to love me, I'm so sorry I fucked that up before."

"Carmy."

He frowned, "I'm sorry."

"I know," you smirked, "and I forgive you. But you know it's gonna take more than a few pretty words and some tears, right?"

He nodded, "Anything to make this work again."

You sighed in patience, "Go say your apologies to the others, we've got t'make a stop before going back to yours - and you're going to take a fucking nap."

"I'm fine - "

"Look me in my eye and try to tell me in the past 72 hours, you've had decent, restful sleep."

He frowned, opening his mouth a few times but then sighing. "You know I can't," he whispered.

"Exactly why we're going back to yours."

Carmy paused, brows furrowing as if a thread pulled them together. He asked softly, "Is that a no to us... Living together? Is that why you're calling it 'my' place?"

You offered him a look of patience and leaned in to peck his lips for a few prolonged seconds, promising, "There's your apartment, there's my apartment, and then there's gonna be our apartment. Somewhere that's just ours, 100% us." His mouth stretched in a grin, so you swiftly cut him off, "But you have to ask me again when you've got restful sleep under your belt. I want you clear headed when you make this kinda decision."

"Yes, ma'am," he agreed. "Where're we goin' before?"

You swallowed nervously, telling him softly, "You absolutely do not have to go with us, but I think Richie could use a visit out to Mikey's grave. I said I'd take him with some flowers, but you do not have to get out to go with us - not if you're not ready."

He blinked a few times, rolling his lips between his teeth as his eyes dropped from yours. You were about to coo his name and assure him again, when he nodded at you and tried to half-smile. "Okay," he breathed.

"Okay?"

"Mhm. I'll, uh... M-Maybe I can, just, hang back in the car."

"Sure, baby, whatever you're comfortable with," you whispered, leaning in to peck his forehead. "You good?"

"I will be."

"Mhm," you hummed, caressing his cheek again before pushing your hand into his curls. "Now, let's get a move on - I want you to march in there, say you're sorry to your Chefs, and then we'll leave."

"Yes, ma'am," Carmy whispered, leaning in to kiss you - but you pulled back.

"Aht," you halted him with a teasing finger to his lips, "after we've got everything worked out, then you can kiss me."

"You got t'kiss me," he mumbled against your finger; making you hum as you fought off a stretching smile, and lower your hand.

"Fair point - just one then - "

He cut you off by, indeed, pressing a single kiss to your lips, but not pulling back. His hand raised to hold the back of your head, your lips spreading in a grin against his; finding rhythm to move together before pausing to press in prolonged passion.

When he pulled back, you both paused to smile, and when you tried to peck his lips again, he pulled back, teasing, "Aht, just the one."

"Oh, fuck you," you laughed lightly, letting him take your hand before leading you back into the kitchen. The other Chefs lingered, sparing you and Carmy a few nervous glances, making you whisper in his ear as you squeezed his hand, "Go ahead, baby, get it done."

He nodded and called the kitchen to attention, clearing his throat, and beginning to make his apologies. He singled out Marcus, then Sydney, Richie, and Sugar; the kitchen staff all accepting his words and insisting he could take the day off - even the next few days if he wanted! You had to usher him to grab his things a few times, nudging him in reminder and verbally pushing him back into action. That boy's ADHD would truly be the death of him.

"So?" Richie smirked at you as Marcus handed you a packaged box of pastries.

"We're talking it out."

He chuckled, "Good. Get him outta here, Peach, dude needs to breathe."

"I got it," you swatted him away as Carmy exited the office. "But we've got somewhere to be first, right?"

He paused, then nodded and asked in a mutter, "He said okay?"

"He's got time to decide what he wants to do, but he knows we're going. C'mon, get your coat."

Richie met you at the front of the restaurant and with a parting wink to Sugar, you took Carmy's hand, tangled your fingers together, and left to venture to your parked car. Carmy got in the front, Richie in the back, and after a stop at a corner bodega to grab three bouquets of flowers, you drove to the cemetery. Carmy was silent, no music played, and Richie's leg bounced in anxious tension; making small conversation with you about your job in an effort to distract himself.

When you arrived, you pulled up on the access road that you knew was closest to Mikey's grave. Richie spared a glare between you and Carmy before muttering that he needed a cigarette and got out of the car to leave you alone. "Baby?" You whispered, reaching for his hand. "Hey, look, if you don't want to go with us, it's okay. We won't be long... But maybe you want to sign this," you showed him the small, blank name card left in the flowers.

"Why?" He whispered.

You shrugged, "So he knows they're from you."

"Peach," he sighed, meeting your eyes.

"Baby, I know it's silly, I know it's easier to ignore it all. But I'd like to believe it's just a nice gesture for our own closure - it's a signed gift from us, to them... And maybe it's nice to pretend that wherever they are, they know what we've left for them."

Carmy nodded slowly, "I-I don't think... I don't think I can go..."

"It's okay, baby," you whispered.

"But," he sniffled, opening his hand to you, "I'll sign it, if you'll leave it for me?"

"Of course," you rushed, opening your purse to producing a pen for him. The clank card rest on the center console of your car, pausing, swallowing nervously, then scribbling his name as he cleared his throat. He offered you the pen, waited until it was put away, then offered the flowers. "Hang tight, we won't be too long," you whispered, leaning in to rest your forehead. "You okay?"

He nodded, pecking your forehead before letting you get out of the car. You handed Richie his own flowers with a signed card, holding your own and Carmy's; linking arms with Rich to venture up the small grass hill and moved about halfway down the cemetery plot line. When you came to his stone, you understood this was what Rich needed more than you, so, you knelt and laid the two bouquets down before starting to quickly groom the area around his tombstone.

You told him, "I'm sorry it's not much, but I'll be back later for a picnic and a chat. I brought you flowers from me a-and from Carmy. He's in the car, but he's here, Mikey... Give him time," you whispered, brushing dirt from the stone before standing. "Take your time," you told Richie softly, seeing the tears gather in his eyes.

"Thanks, Peach," he whispered, offering you a tight hug. When you pulled back and started to walk away, Richie lowered himself to kneel and lay his own flowers down; hearing him tell Mikey, "Don't gotta worry 'bout us, Mike-Man, Peach is the glue that keeps us together. Shit, she even got Carmy out here..."

You made it back to the car and got in, smiling at Carmy - but dropping it the instant you saw tears in his eyes. "Talk to me," you whispered, reaching for a wet wipe in your glovebox to clean your hands after plucking the grass and brushing off dirt from the grave.

"Why can't I get out?"

You only stared at him for a long moment, unsure what to say.

"I'm here... I'm finally here... Why can't I get out?"

"You're not ready," you nodded, tossing the wipe aside to a plastic bag. "It's okay, Carmy, it's okay to not be ready yet. We can come back when you are," you reached for his hand.

"I think this added to my frustration," he admitted. "I couldn't... I didn't go to the funeral, haven't been here since he was... You know."

"Laid to rest."

"Yeah," he sighed. "Fuck's wrong with me?"

"You're grieving," you relented, nuzzling closer so your head rested on his shoulder. "It's not linear, Carmy, baby, just let yourself feel. When you try to repress your emotions, you lash out inappropriately."

"I know," he whispered, "'M sorry."

"It's not your fault," you promised, the two of you quietly bowing your heads together. You remained as such until Richie got back in the car, and from there, it was quiet as everyone stewed in their own emotion. You dropped Rich back at work before promising to call him later and driving away; heading for Carmy's apartment in the soothing silence, his hand locked in yours.

When you arrived at his apartment, you froze upon seeing the interior's state. "Oh, Carmy, no," you whispered, frowning deeply.

"Looks worse than it is," he deflected. You only hummed and let him lead you to the bedroom; watching him strip and prepare for bed before joining you on the mattress. He crashed almost immediately, sighing in relief as he pecked over your shoulder and collarbone, muttering, "'M so glad you're back. 'M so sorry, Peach."

"I know you are, and I forgive you," you told him softly, carding a manicured hand through his hair. "Just get some rest, baby."

He was asleep nearly instantly. He deflated on top of you, deeply resting enough to not notice you slip out from under him. You cleaned his entire apartment; doing laundry, cleaning, scrubbing, replacing necessities he deemed himself too lazy to pay attention to. You did dishes, cleaned out his fridge, and as you mopped up the floors, the sun set and Carmy emerged from the bedroom.

"Baby?" He mumbled in earnest confusion, sighing in relief when he saw you.

"What? Afraid I disappeared on you?" You teased with a small grin.

"For sure," he mumbled, wiping sleep from his eyes; making your amusement dim when you realized the nerve it struck. "The hell you doin'?"

"You didn't seriously think I could rest knowing this monster of a clean-up job lingered out here, did you?"

"I don't want you t'clean after me."

"Well, too late," you smirked. "You good now?"

"I feel better, yeah."

"Good."

"And I made up my mind."

"Hmm? About what?"

"I'm gonna take some time off work," he nodded, "and focus on us. Get us in a new crib, it'll be nice."

"Think you can handle that?"

He nodded, "I'll have to, you're the most important thing in my life, I can't lose you. So, if I gotta take time off, that's the least of my worries. I'm only here for us, for you."

You smiled at him, setting the mop aside to wrap him in your arms. "I like the sound of that, us making a home together - being able to decorate a new home. But don't let me overdo it, okay? I get all excited and kinda bulldoze my way through projects. I don't want you t'find real reason t'resent me."

"Nah, that ain't possible," he promised quietly.

True to his word, Carmy took three solid weeks off; agreeing to a fourth week as a contact-only consultant. You and he slept in most days, looking at apartments, and not once did he even mention work. He was diligent in his attention, focused on you and you alone; putting in overtime to rebuild that what was broke by focusing on shared interests again. You found a place you loved ready for what was basically immediate move-in, taking time to pack your respected places and prepare for the official start of your cohabitating relationship.

You didn't forget what he said, being reserved in your displays of love. Yet Carmy was different; he was totally clingy the moment you returned to his life. He feared letting you go meant you'd disappear again, feared you'd run away again. He held your hand at every possible opportunity, got you a fresh bouquet of weekly flowers, ran all his errands with you; never went to bed without you, cooked all meals with you in the kitchen - perched up on a counter. Most showers you took together, and almost every night was spent cuddling on the couch or in bed with either a book being shared between you or a new show playing on the mounted flatscreen TV.

Carmy clung because he thought if he showed you acts of his love, it'd allow comfort towards your loving behavior to flourish again - and he was right. It took a little bit of time, but Carmy clung tighter and tighter; ensuring you started to reciprocate before ever easing up in the intensity of his affectionate displays. He didn't want to overwhelm you, but knew you needed the reassurance.

You were cautious, you were apprehensive; tiptoeing around Carmy even when living together before warming back up to him. You didn't need to repeat the words he hurled at you all those weeks ago, not wanting to dredge up repressed feelings, but never letting him forget what he said. Your actions spoke enough, skittish around his affection; something Carmy took note of and despised himself for. He made up for it, of course he did, it was Carmy and he hated tension and conflict in his closest circles of life. Yet it wasn't so easy for you two to move forward, they weren't just words to you.

They were direct insults to you as a person; to you and how you loved others. Carmy had seen your deepest fear and used it as a defense against you - wanting you to hurt the way he was, too. He understood this wasn't acceptable, knowing the next time he resorted to such despicable actions, you'd simply walk away; never dealing with disrespect, so, he needed to be acutely aware of his words.

You would never allow yourself to be someone else's doormat, but part of being an adult is understanding that people were allowed to make mistakes - it's part of being fucking human. How terrible you'd feel if someone held your own mistakes against you, because the truth was, you weren't perfect either.

Part of being in a(n adult) relationship is understanding when someone apologized, it was best to accept and move on because nothing was ever solved by dragging turmoil out. This didn't mean forget what happened, forget whatever emotion was evoked - but to do your part to repair what was broken; no matter who was at fault, it always took Two to Tango.

And in this song and dance, you were ready to sweep around the dance floor if only with Carmy. Because that's what a relationship was; a conscious effort by both partners to work as one, to dance in-sync; owning the art together, as equal partners.

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The Bear masterlist

Clingy Baby collection masterlist

#carmy berzatto #carmy the bear #carmy x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto imagine #carmy berzatto angst #carmy berzatto fluff #carmy berzatto hurt and comfort #the bear #the bear fx #the bear hulu #carmen berzatto #carmen carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x you #carmen berzatto fic #carmen berzatto fanfiction #carmy berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x fem!reader #carmy berzatto x female!reader

[c-nstellati-ns]

Are you still accepting requests? If so how about making a mess of Cassidy? That man is incredibly cocky but as soon as he's under you he's a whining mess

YOUR BODY’S BANGIN’, OUT OF CONTROL! — short

author’s note — little filler post b4 i finish schtuff

word count — 424

featuring — cole cassidy

cw — NSFW CONTENT, dom!gn!reader, sub!cole, less of cocky cassidy and more of him being pampered bc i love him, this barely counts a fic sorry it looked longer on my doc

all works belong to c-nstellati-ns ⓒ 2023. do not steal or repost. ask before translating.

MDNI. 18+ CONTENT BELOW, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

“C’mon, pretty boy… why so quiet?” You coo, a teasing tone to your voice.

Cole lets out a choked noise, fisting desperately at the sheets as you peppered more kisses against his soft stomach. Each time, you purposely avoided the place he needed you the most. His marked thighs twitch around your head with each touch to his heated skin.

“J-just get on wit’ it, won’t ya? ‘m gonna explode…” He says with a shaky sigh, lightly grasping at your thick locs in an attempt to ground himself.

With each intimate moment you’ve spent with Cassidy, you’ve noticed that his accent gets so much thicker. It was cute, you thought. You had half the mind to try and tease him about it, but you’ve already denied him for so long. The poor man looked like he was coming undone at the seams. His pretty lashes stuck with tears, his amber eyes hazy but locked onto yours. His lips were bitten and red, just how you like it.

After a moment of gazing over him, you chuckled and pressed another kiss to his abdomen after nipping the tanned skin. He groans and gently tugs at your hair, “P-please…” His voice is airy, soft. It’s a stark difference compared to how deep his voice usually was.

“Mm… you’re lucky I’m a sucker for you, sweet thing.” You mutter hungrily, leaning in to lock lips with him in a sloppy kiss. You can feel him wrap his arms and legs around you tightly, keeping you locked in.

Cass pulls back briefly, his lips ghosting against yours. “We only have so much time… need you, baby— please… please.” He sounded so desperate, who were you to deny him? You kissed his cheek, his beard briefly brushing against your own.

“Gonna take real good care of you, gorgeous.” You wrapped a hand around his leaking cock, making him gasp. You rub a hand over his slit, stroking him steadily. The little pleased noises that slipped from his lips were delicious. “Don’t you worry.”

You ran a hand through his soft hair, his hat having been discarded a long time ago when you knocked it over in a heated frenzy. He looked prettier like this anyways. You couldn’t wait to ravage him completely and leave him all breathless by the end of this. You tugged his head back, pulling away to bite at his neck, hearing his sweet moans as you kiss his Adam’s apple. “I got ya, love.”

Let’s just say Cole had a mighty good evening that night.

#achilles' thirsts ⭐ #nonnie !! #top male reader #dom male reader #dom reader #top reader #sub character #sub cole cassidy #cole cassidy x reader #cole cassidy #x reader #overwatch x reader #this is inspired by that one pedro pascal edit but its cass #need him so bad

[bradshawsbitch]

Can you write a fic with your two prompts “I’m on my way” and “you shoot anyone who comes through that door that isn’t me” with Jake Seresin please!! Thanks so much!!

listen, I'm alright with angst, but I know jack shit about guns (I ain't ever seen one in my whole damn life) so I did my best! hope you like it still! 🥹

warnings; angst, mentions of food prep, someone trying to get into your house, frantic knocking on doors and windows, gun mention, gn!reader, mentions of knowing how to breathe silently

word count; 750 (we're gettin there folks!)

Tidying up the last of your meal prep for the week, you smiled proudly at yourself - offering yourself a soft pat on your shoulder. Putting the filled glass tupperware lunches in the fridge, you closed it with a happy little 'whoop!'.

Your boyfriend, Jake, had left a couple of hours earlier to meet up with his co-workers for some drinks and pool. You knew he wouldn't be home until much later, and had made sure to keep yourself occupied with some chores while he was gone.

Making your way up the stairs, getting ready for bed, you suddenly heard a frantic banging on your door. Your heart leapt harshly in your chest, and you hoped that Jake had made sure to lock the door as he always did when he left. The banging was not the kind where you could tell it was a friend who had been knocking a while without getting an answer, nor was it anyone who wanted to know if you'd heard about their lord and saviour - Jesus Christ.

The knocking stopped abruptly, and you made a point of breathing silently - the way you'd done as a child to hear better. Before jumping when the knocking changed sounds, and you can tell the person had moved around the back of the house to knock at your windows.

Closing and locking the door to yours and Jake's bedroom, you slipped into bed under the covers, fishing your cell out of your back pocket.

"Pick up, pick up, pick up," you whispered to yourself as you called Jake.

"Hey, honey!" Jake's cheery tone came through the receiver, the familiar sound of Rooster's voice booming in the background.

"Jake, I think someone might be trying to break in!" you whisper yelled, as the knocking got louder and closer to your bedroom window.

"What!?" Jake sounded serious now, and you could tell he was already walking towards the exit of the bar.

"Yeah, someone's bangin' on the door and windows and-" you yelped slightly as you heard someone shout outside. "Oh god," you whimpered, heart racing in your chest.

"I'm on my way." Jake's voice was nigh on harsh "Stay on the phone with me okay, babe?" softening his voice, you could hear his feet hitting gravel as he ran to his parked car.

"What if someone needs help?" you said meekly, peaking out from your blanket fort. "They could be hurt or--"

"Don't!" Jake nearly yelled "If they need help they can call the god damn police, okay, honey? Don't open the door. Fuck, you are too damn kind for your own good!" Jake was cursing as you heard his engine roar to life.

"Holy shit!" you yelped, slapping a hand over your mouth as there was a loud crash coming from where your front door was situated.

"You shoot anyone that comes through that door that isn't me!" Jake hissed, and your brows shot up. "Jake, I don't fucking know how to shoot a damn gun!"

There was silence on the other end of the line before Jake said "I'm almost home." you thought you could hear Javy groaning in the background "Seresin, are you tellin' me your spouse doesn't know how to handle a gun?" you could've scoffed at Machado's jibe, seeing as it was said in all well meaning.

"Jake, the knocking has stopped, I think they're gone" you whispered "Yeah, well, stay where you are." Jake commanded, voice filled with an authority you knew must scare new little babes at Top Gun half to death.

Hearing a car door slam, you were quite certain your boyfriend had made it home, and it was confirmed by the door swinging open downstairs and Jake's familiar voice calling for you.

"Is that you?" you whispered on the phone, and you could hear Jake's strained sigh

"Yes, it's me honey."

"So I don't shoot now?"

"Well apparently you wouldn't know how to even if you'd wanted to," you heard Jake's voice enter your bedroom as the line went dead.

Jumping up from under the covers you jumped into his embrace. Inhaling his scent you muttered that you'd been scared and that you were thankful he was home. Javy, Mickey, and Bradley were outside checking your garden. Mickey had called the cops from the car, so they'd be there soon too.

"Are you okay?" Jake soothed, pressing his lips to yours as he held you in his arms. You nodded "You're here now." was your simple reply.

"I'm here now,"

#jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake seresin blurb #jake seresin angst #this ain't too good but still! hope you liked it :)

[soadawritesstuff]

Pillows

Pairing: touya todoroki x fem!reader, quirkless au

Wordcount: 2.2K

Synopsis: What started out as the innocent intention of building a pillowfort turned into a pillow-ruining night that washes away any remains of an exhausting week

Warnings: 18+ (Minors, don't test me), unprotected bangin', reader has female genitalia but isn't adressed by any pronouns, fluff, smut, penetration, too much plot, established relationship

A/N: Boy, this is LONG. I made this one extra fluffy and sweet so enjoy to your heart's content. The author takes no responibility for any possible cases of cavities which may occur as a side effect.

It was a slow friday afternoon, the weekend was ahead, nothing fancy was happening or planned to happen. Your usual routine slowly drifts into endless boredom as you watch the sun crawl past the horizon out of your apartment window. There was simply no motivation to make dinner. You ran out of ideas and canned ravioli for the 3rd time this week didn't sound particularly exciting. But there was no need to rush it anyways.

Your string of summernight-melancholic thoughts was cut short by the sudden yet soft ring of your doorbell. You weren't expecting anyone so you decided to just pretend you weren't home. Probably some sales-associate or a package for an absent neighbour. Unnecessary social-encounters should always be avoided.

It rings again. No movement.

And again. No reaction, also again.

Again. Again. Again. Whoever was at the door was determined to get on your nerves. Under a storm of doorbell-rings, you begrudgingly open the door.

"The fuck took so long?"

In front of you stood your boyfriend with a pissy expression and two bags overflowingly full of what looked like groceries. Disheveled white spikes hang low in his face yet still allow his haunting blue eyes to flash through the fluff.

"More like the fuck are you doing here?", you step aside to let him in, Touya pushing past you awkwardly as you give him a puzzled look.

"Didn't feel like eating alone today so I'm invading your personal space", he drops the bags and takes off his shoes. "You're WELCOME". That man desperately needed new sneakers but you KNOW he won't replace them until they'd literally fall apart.

"Why didn't you call first? I could've helped you carry."

"Would've ruined the suprise-factor", your boyfriend flashes you one of his classic grins that gives you tingles all over your body. He just knows what to do at the right times, especially after a stressfull week this was just heaven. You didn't know how in need you were for some comforting until you found yourself in a warm and safe embrace that took a good couple of minutes.

"Thank you Tou" came out slightly muffled for your face was smooshed between his chest and arms. "No problem, baby", the words drawl out as a sigh, his hands slide down onto your hips, foreheads and noses touching, eyes shut. He was exhausted as well, his breaths gently fanning over yours. You gently run your fingers through his messy hair, getting a deep sigh of approval. You could stand in this hallway hugging him for eternity.

The low grumble of your stomach breaks the moment, earning you a snort from Touya.

"C'mon, we'll have all the time in the world after we've eaten", your boyfriend gives you one last squeeze before sliding out of the embrace to grab one of the heavy plastic bags. He thought of everything, instant noodles, fresh veggies, snacks. The guy knew you better than you knew yourself, it would be creepy if it wasn't so impressive.

You spend the next 10 minutes in silence, carefully sorting all the groceries into their respective spots in your small apartment-kitchen. It was nice having Touya's presence in your home. The feeling of loneliness slowly evaporated into nothing, a spreading warmth taking it's place. It bubbles down your throat straight down to your stomach, the entire space smells just like him. Musky yet fresh and overly comfortable. No matter how long you already were together, he never stops making you feel hazy merely with his existence.

"...babe!"

"Mmm?", you got lost in your train of thought.

"I asked you what you want to eat. 3 times", Touya has snaked behind you, taking hold of your waist and pulling you into him as he leans against the kitchen counter. You feel warmth radiating off his torso, smothering you with a wave of relaxation as he gently presses kisses into your hair. "What's up with you, hmm?" Touya's voice has grown low and soft, letting a shiver ripple through you.

"Sorry", a sigh gives away the exhaustion that has been building up for days now. "Week's been shitty", you allow your eyes to close for just a few seconds while leaning into your boyfriend's chest. Everything was a mess at the moment.

"Mm, 'm sorry babe" the hands on your waist lift to give you gentle head scratches. The room turns into a comfortable silence as you let yourself drift in the moment. The evening sun casts it's last rays through your window, bathing the small kitchen in a beautiful red hue. He makes it so easy to forget.

After a few minutes you force your eyes to open again, drowsyness a weight on your eyelids. "Tou, we need to make some food, I'll fall asleep without dinner..." No response. "Touya...", still nothing. "Touya?". Soft yet deep breaths tell you all you need to know. The motherfucker fell asleep while standing up. You wriggle around to face him, a deep sigh rises your chest as you face the white haired man that shamelessly dozed off in your kitchen. His features look ever so peaceful in his half-slumber and your eyes linger on his lips just a second too long.

But this isn't naptime and you were still hungry.

"Babe, wake up...wake up, damn", you couldn't surpress a snort at his now irritated expression while barely cracking one eye open. He takes a deep breath before pushing himself off the counter-edge. "Right...", if it weren't for your stomach, both of you woul've eventually fallen asleep right then.

"We'll make somethin fancy tomorrow"

"Instant Ramen?"

"Instant Ramen."

You attentively watch Touya pour the steaming hot water into both of the shabby plastic cups, making sure he doesn't dare overfill them. Chicken Teriyaki. The boiling water slowly crawls over the dry noodles, the flavor powder and comes to a perfect stop at the line. You propped up your head on your palms, elbows resting on the kitchen counter as you listened to the the clock on the kitchen wall softly ticking it's busy rythm.

"You know what we haven't done in forever?", your boyfriend's attention shifts from the freshly poured cups to your bored figure and blank stare. "Hmm?"

"Built a pillow fort. Why'd we ever stop doing that?"

For a brief moment the room turned silent, the soft ticking of your clock now somehow louder but your boyfriend's expression 2 notches more in thought than before. "You know what, that's not an unreasonable question". Of course it isn't, after all it was you who asked it. "Tell you what, after we finish eating we'll build the best damn pillow fort this world has ever seen, hm?" A wide grin spreads over your face. You can always count on him when it came to whacky or silly ideas. Steal a shopping cart? He's in. Scribble moustaches and glasses on movie posters? You don't even have to ask.

After a silent but comfortable round of eating, burning your mouth due to your misjudgement of the broth's temperature and Touya's nasty laugh after announcing your tounge's unfortunate demise, you quickly tidy up the table and kitchen. There was absolutely no time to waste as your mission was a serious one: Scavage the entire apartment for anything remotely soft. Touya threw in the idea to place a timer to decide who was better at finding the most building material. Only a fool would challenge you on your own battlefield and it seems like your partner will learn that lesson the hard way.

You grin triumphantly as Touya stares at your loot-pile consisting of multiple blankets, pillows, a mattress and various plushies. Poor dude only got the couch cushions and some T-shirts so naturally you force him to (begrudgingly) admit his obvious defeat. Both of you are quick to plan and construct a suprisingly impressive fort. There were some collapses here and there, but you managed to build a decently stable pillow-paradise in just under an hour.

"Well what can I say, we did it again", shiny eyes look upon your creation like it's your beloved son. Pride, exhaustion, satisfaction. No lesser words could describe the feelings your baby of blankets and pillows triggers inside you. And the fairy-lights are a nice touch you added last minute. "We did it like no child could dream of achieving", you prop your elbow on Touya's shoulder, or at least attempt to do so until it unavoidably slips off that very same shoulder.

"Yup, we are definetly geniuses".

"Undeniably."

....

"You wanna fuck in it?"

"You know me so well."

What started as an innocent idea quickly turned into giggles and a heated make-out under a pile of blankets and pillows. Your head in his hands, drowning you in passionate kisses that steal your breath little by little.

The fairy-lights cozily twinkle, the blankets used as walls give a sensual ambience as Touya's soft kisses travel all over your body, leaving a trail of goosebumps. That man knew how to make the butterflies in your stomach party. Soft and gentle touches up and down your sides as he traps you under him, forcing you deeper into the comfortable pile of pillows. Touya's hands slide under you, grazing your back and unclasping your bra in the process. Said bra is then tossed aside, as is your shirt and his shirt. Together they disappear in the depths of the fort and will only reappear with the next washing.

His hands gently squeeze your breasts, a shiver in his breath giving away your boyfriend's arousal. Deep breaths, Touya's broken-off moans and desperate dry humping shoots tingly electricity through your body, the air grows hot, steamy. Meanwhile both of you grow more impatient. A hand slides down your abdomen, past your panties and right towars your pulsing pussy, pushing the lacy material aside and massaging your clit in slow circles.

All you can press out is a breathy "Tou..." before his long fingers sink inside the clenching wetness that is now your cunt. Slow and deep and way too intense for you to handle. Circling thrusts and gasps.

"Feeling good, princess?", Touya stars nibbling at the shell of your ear. "Hmm?" his voice just a whisper and his shallow breaths trickling down to your neck, warm and overwhelming. "Mmm, 's so so good", god you sound so whiney, soft moans grow louder and louder. The wave of your growing orgasm is oh so close to crashing.

His breathy moan at your clench chucks you over the breaking point, waves of tingly pleasure wash over your body, pupils blown wide as Touya finger-fucks you through your first orgasm. "Shhh shh baby, you're doing soooo well". He has a way of drawling out his praises so deliciously. It doesn't stop your entire body from quaking but the praise is oddly pleasing. Maybe a tiny bit too pleasing.

A deep chuckle steers your attention back to the personification of sin himself. "You ok there doll?"

"Mmm, just perfect..", your heart skips just a bit when Touya pulls you towards him, grabbing the backs of your knees in the process and folding your legs over your torso.

"Then I presume you are up for more", a lustful glint flickers in those devilish eyes, "right?"

You could also always count on Touya's immaculate talent of having you yelp under him in no-time. The guy has your entire body burned into his mind and makes sure you know it. Deep, intense thrusts and sweat pearling off his body. Deep moans spilling past his lips as high pitched ones do past yours, the sounds of sex alone leave nothing to the imagination. His tight hold of your hip and the underside ouf your thigh forces his body even closer, the slow pace slowly fucking you into absolute oblivion.

"Damn babe, fuck", his low drawls send shivers through you. "y'feel so damn good". By now the squelching between your legs has grown louder. You catch your boyfriend's eyes roll back shortly before his head is thrown into his neck as he hits your special spot, having you clench in an instant. Hitting it over and over and over, all you are capable of doing is scream his name and desperately clutching the soft pillows beneath. Pressure builds up in your core, tighter and tighter. Snap.

White ecstacy ripples over your body in a tsunami of tingly bliss. All bodily controll leaves your body as you turn into a puddle beneath Touya, who follows up right after. Thick ropes of release mixing with yours as the white-haired man collapses right on top of you.

"Shit..", erratic panting fills the small pillow-filled space followed by light breathy laughter.

"We shamelessly ruined those pillows", that gives you a snort and a kiss pressed to your sweat-dampened temple. "We love making a mess huh". Gentle kisses get exchanged once again as both of you come down from your high.

"We should definetly toss the cases in the wash before shit dries". The last thing you need now is crusty pillow cases over the weekend.

"We should give the fort a name"

After cleaning up your mess, both of you got cozy in your usual sleep-attire. It was decided that you might as well spend the night inside the fort.

"How about Kevin?". Touya snorts.

"Babe, this is so not giving Kevin"

"Oh yeah? Then let's hear your suggestion"

"Ok, hear me out", you quirk an eyebrow as Touya stretches his arms out and dramatically pictures the name in the air.

"S h e l b y"

...

"Absolutely not"

"You are such a hater"

Who needs sleep when you could spend the next hour bickering about Pillow-fort names?

#questioning all my life choices that lead up to me writing this rn #my parents would be PROUD #touya todoroki #touya fluff #touya todoroki x you #touya todoroki x reader #touya todoroki smut #bnha dabi #bnha #bnha smut #mha #mha smut #dabi x reader #dabi fluff #dabi smut #quirkless au

[obsolescent]

Kinktober - Day 13

Pairing: Jake Muller x Reader

Prompt: Back scratching

Author’s Notes: It felt like I was sprinkled with inspiration dust with this one, or maybe I’m just a bit feral over Jake. Anyways, enjoy!

Content Warnings: No gendered language for reader, AFAB reader, cunninlingus, teasing, P in V sex, creampie, squirting, orgasm delay, multiple orgasms.

Kinktober Masterlist

You’re sitting in bed watching television, waiting for Jake to arrive home. He said he would come home tonight, but glancing at your phone’s screen, the 1:15 AM glaring back at you tells you otherwise. ‘Guess it’s going to be more like morning,’ you sigh. Jake’s work runs him rampant for the most part, having him gone days at a time and him arriving home rumpled and scruffy.

A door slamming jolts you from your thoughts and before you can move out from the covers, Jake storms into the bedroom. “Are you–” his body sprawling across your lap, face down, cuts you off, him landing with a huff of breath leaving his body.

Groaning, Jake turns his head from the sheets towards you. “Sorry, babe. Work took for-fucking-ever this time.” You smile gently at him, noticing the dark circles under his blue eyes. If his auburn hair wasn’t buzzed off, it would surely be in a tousled mess. “It’s alright, darlin’,” you respond, rubbing his back.

He hums, “Need a goddamn vacation…” He mutters, crossing his arms underneath himself, laying his chin on them. You nod, listening to his complaints, your hand slipping under his shirt. You begin lightly scratching, nails softly dragging in a figure 8 pattern across the entirety of his back. 

Jake groans, “Shit, baby, harder,” you chuckle, bearing down some more, marks now forming due to the added pressure. He relaxes further on top of you, humming appreciatively after every so often pass of your hand. Jake suddenly sits upright, tossing his shirt off, moving his legs to straddle you, pushing you back against the bed.

He cocks his head and smirks. Humming, he says, “This view never gets old,” you roll your eyes and scoff, raising an eyebrow. “Now it’s my turn to make you feel good,” at that, you’re suddenly aware of his erection pressing into you. Widening your eyes, you begin to blush, “All worked up over me scratching your back?”

 He chuckles, “Hey, sue me. Haven’t seen you in almost a week. Been missing you and that bangin’ body of yours.” You laugh, tossing your head back. Jake takes the opportunity to start kissing your neck, nibbling every so often. You moan, arms slipping underneath his holding himself up, hands coming up to resume their ministrations on his back. He groans against you, grinding his hips against you, just so slightly grazing against your throbbing clit. 

You whimper, pulling him closer. “F-fuck, Jake. More, please,” you breathe out, nails digging into his skin. He huffs, and in one smooth motion, lifts up to pull the sheets from your body and pulls your nightgown up past your chest. You gasp, still surprised after all this time at his quick movements.

He grins at your expression, pulling his jeans and underwear down in one go, exposing his pulsating cock. Your eyes regarded his body, taking in all his glory. Scars speckled throughout his sculpted body, defined lines of muscle catching your eye as they trail down to his V line, down to the patch of red curls framing his dick.

“Guess you really missed me too, huh?” Smug as hell, as always. “Just fuck me,” you say with an eye roll. “Gladly,” is all Jake says before grabbing your underwear and discarding them on the floor somewhere, your wet cunt on display. He hums, grabbing your legs and pulling you further down into the sheets, pushing them back into your chest so far until your ass lifts off the bed.

His mouth engulfs your pussy, tongue repeating the figure 8 patterns you had created on his back. Your eyes roll back into your head, savoring his hot, wet mouth against you again. Your hand slaps onto his head, the other playing with your nipple. He grunts at the smack, smirking against you. “Easy there, tiger,” the murmur resonates against you, sending pleasure throughout.

Legs trembling in his hold, you buck into his mouth, edging nearer. Jake pulls away and you whimper, “No goddamnit, come back,” you bite out, propping up on your elbows. He moves you back into position, slapping his cock against your aching clit. You shudder, “S-stop teasing me,” you grasp at his forearms. “Nah, I don’t think I will,” chuckling meanly, “Wonder if you can cum just from me tapping my dick against you.”

You groan, head sinking back into the pillows. He takes his thumbs and spreads you apart, the tips breaching your hole while he switches between nudging, tapping, and rubbing you, orgasm slowly building up again. You’re honestly frustrated that he may be right, he could get you to cum just from this. You try to delay your climax, tensing against the bed. He raises his eyebrows, smirk forming. “Huh, reckon I can.” 

You screw your eyes shut, focusing on not cumming now, but Jake isn’t having it. Speeding up his technique, thumbs massaging your insides. You feel yourself losing the battle. “Come on, know you wanna cum, baby. Give it to me.” No longer able to hold back, you release, clit jumping against his cock’s touches, squirt splashing against him.

“Oh yeah, fuck. Love when you squirt,” he groans out, dick dragging through the mess before plunging inside you to the hilt, steady pace quickly established. Your moaning is loud and reverberates through the room, your sounds mixed with Jakes grunts and your dripping cunt creating a sloppy symphony. Rapidly approaching his end, Jake’s hips slapping against the backs of your thighs begin to lose their rhythm, “Been holding this load since I left, gonna fill you up, goddamn,” He grits through his teeth, grip tightening on your legs. 

“Please please cum in me, Jake. Want it so bad,” begging him is what does him in. Letting out a drawn out moan, he slams into you once more before staying flushed against you, filling you with his cum, warming you from the inside out, dribbling out between your connection. He sighs, gazing at your cunt still clenching around him. He moves one hand from your leg and places it onto your now needy clit, his plowing bringing you close again.

“Heh, think you can do one more?” He says as his thumb does quick motions once more, before he switches to his middle and ring finger, getting a better placement with them. Doesn’t take much before you’re cumming once more, moaning out his name as your pussy begs to keep his dick burrowed inside.

Before you can come back to your senses, he’s lifting you off the bed, still seated deep within you. “Let’s clean up, huh? Gotta keep that plug in or that shit’ll get everywhere.” You don’t know how many more times you can roll your eyes at him, instead opting to just lay boneless against his body as he carries you two towards the bathroom.

Tags: @caramlizedtomatoes, @cheezbites, @dwkfan, @emilzke, @httpsuguru, @neondogs, @roseglazedlens, @scar-crossedlvrs

#o’s kinktober #jake muller x reader #jake muller x gn!reader #jake muller smut #resident evil smut #kinktober

[tmntxthings]

HELLO!! I've been binging your fics lately and I am absolutely in love with your writing!! I haven't seen many but I was wondering if you could do a Rise Donnie x chubby reader? Nothing with insecurity or anything, maybe just something fluffy! It's rare to come across fics w a chubby reader that isn't angsty LOL -👑

What Are You Waiting For?

author’s notes: animal by neon trees influenced this oneshot greatly, I hope my 👑 anon that this is what you had in mind 💜✨

warnings: longer oneshot, super fluffy

> part two <

—————————————————————————

Donnie was humming along to a song as he floated above the tall buildings of New York City. He was currently scanning all the nearby buildings with his headset, until his gear loaded in a match. “Found you!” Donnie said triumphantly as he pushed back the goggles. It was 9:00 pm, the sun only having gone down an hour or two ago. But Donnie couldn’t help himself, plus he was dressed pretty inconspicuously, purple hoodie and all. He landed in the alley next to the small bakery, making sure he looked presentable and his tech was stowed away in his shell.

“Alright Othello Von Ryan, be smooth~” he spoke to himself as he started walking to the sideway. “Yo bro, where you at?” Leo’s voice patched in from Donnie’s wrist tech. “Occupied, talk later!” Donnie said immediately before turning off the voice channel, not wanting any interruptions once he finally walked into the shop. The smell of freshly baked goods wafted into his face as he opened the door. And coffee! He sighed dreamily, if he could bottle this smell up he would. Which gave him an idea for later. But back to the task at hand!

He was the only customer in the store, which was a shame as well as an advantage. He’d have your absolute attention, though as he looked around, the counter also seemed to be empty. Then as if his thoughts had called to you, you came bursting through the back door that led to the kitchen. “Sorry about that dear customer, I was taking out some macaroons from the oven!” You said not looking over at him just yet as you crossed out something on a tiny notebook. After that you finally looked up, Donnie had made his way to the counter, like a moth drawn to flames. “Oh! Donnie, it’s you!” You graced him with a smile and Donnie could only nod for a few seconds before actual thoughts came to him.

“Yes it is I, Donatello, your favorite and most valued customer,” he said smiling a little smug smile. You giggled at that, shaking your head but not going as far as verbally refuting. “You always like to come when I’m about to close up shop!” You said as you glanced down at the treats you had left. Today looked to be a busy day for you as Donnie looked at his options. All his favorites were gone and he clutched at where his heart would be. “Not the scones! And the petits-fours too?!” Donatello hid a frown behind his hand as he contemplated trying something new or just getting a coffee. “Oh wait!” You said shaking him from his inner thoughts as you quickly disappeared from his view back into the kitchen.

When you emerged both your hands were behind your back as if to hide something. Donnie looked at you curiously and it wasn’t til you stood right in front of him, the counter the only thing between the two of you, did you reveal two perfect little cakes. Donnie gasped as you said, “I thought you might come tonight and remembered to save your favorite!” Donnie smiled brightly, they even had purple frosting on them! He readily held out his gloved hands, you gently placed them both and he was enraptured by your fingers, they were so small compared to his own. So cute and chubby and he blushed to himself at the word cute. “That’ll be $10, did you want a coffee too?”

You didn’t seem to notice him going into a reverie over just the sight of your cute hands up close. “Hmm? Oh yeah I’ll have a coffee, your special” he specified, because not only were you an excellent baker but you were a bangin’ coffee maker too. Donnie didn’t think he would ever make his own coffee if all it took was a five minute trip here from the lair. “Coming right up, most valued customer,” you giggled and winked at him. He was stunned, you were usually so shy with him. But he had become a regular, maybe you were finally warming up to him! That thought made him feel all mushy inside, he reallyyyy wanted you to be comfortable around him.

He watched as you flitted around behind the counter whipping up his coffee. “Soo do you have any plans after you close up shop for the night?” Donnie was trying his hardest to be smooth. He had practiced that line about 20 times. “No plans!” You said in concentration as you poured a certain amount of creamer into a cup. “Welll” Donnie started to fidget, getting nervous because this was the part that would either mean success or failure. “I was wondering, if you would wanna go watch a movie sometime?” He had been staring at the back of your head with pleading eyes hoping for just a chance and when you turned to him, cup of coffee in your hands he looked away, down at the countertop.

He was too nervous! How could he possibly watch as you turned him down. He should’ve known- “I love movies! When were you thinking?” You chirped happily as you slid the coffee into his frame of view. His head shot up, “Really?” then just as quickly he said, “I mean, we can go tonight! To the theater just around the corner?” He said a smug smile coming back to his face. But relief flooded his mind, he couldn’t believe it! You were giving him a chance!! “Sounds good to me, it’ll take me a couple of minutes after closing to get the shop ready for tomorrow,” you said and Donnie was offering his assistance. “Oh no, you haven’t even started on your coffee and cakes!” You said nodding to his hands.

Which reminded him he needed to pay! And as he started digging around for his wallet you stopped him, “how about you get a special discount tonight since you’re taking me out on a date,” you gave him another flirtatious wink. Boom. His brain fried up completely as his mouth dropped open slightly, “I’ll be right back!” You said giggling at his reaction as you went to get the shop ready for tomorrow. Donnie found his way to a table and a chair as he sat down not really thinking about anything other than you winking at him. His heart was pounding as he sipped on his coffee and nibbled the petit-fours. He was a goner if you kept flirting with him like that, he’d surely make a fool out of himself!

But while his brain was running around flailing it’s imaginative arms in worry, Donnie’s heart was fired up and ready. He wanted you to flirt with him again, and he wanted to flirt back. He just needed another opportunity and not short circuit like before. When he finished off the treats and coffee he went to the trash can to throw away the wrappers and empty cup. When he turned around you were coming out from behind the counter, apron off and hair down. He swore under his breath as he took in your fitting jeans and cute purple shirt. You were so pretty, and he obviously knew that before, but seeing you now with his favorite color on you and the rest of your outfit, your hair down, his heart was racing. “Ready?” You smiled shyly as you twirled a strand of hair absentmindedly. “Yep,” he said in awe as he held the door open for you. You smiled, waiting for him to follow through before locking the door with your keys.

“So what movie were you thinking?” you said getting the conversation flowing and Donnie breathed through his nose to try and get it together. “I’m down for anything, but my favorites are sci-fi and action,” the conversation went on from there as he learned your favorites. The two of you walking closely together as the night had gotten chilly. He wasn’t ready to make a move like wrapping an arm around you, but maybe he’d work up the courage in the theater! He still couldn’t believe it, that you had agreed and it had a constant smile on his face. “Oh look! They’ve got Avatar 2!!” You said excitedly and before he knew it you had his gloved hand in your own, tugging him forward as you ran to the ticket booth. His mind screeched as he moved trying to keep up but his eyes were glued to where you held his hand. He wished he didn’t have the gloves on, to be able to feel you, but he pushed that thought away quickly. Baby steps Donatello, don’t go ruining things just yet!

“Two for Avatar,” Donnie said as he pulled out his wallet with his free hand, not wanting you to let go but you did so he could grab some dolla dolla bills. Tickets now in hand, Donnie pushed open the door letting you walk by him, you smelled like your bakery, he tried not close his eyes at the smell. “Are you hungry?” Donnie said as he followed after you noticing the snack bar. “Hmm do you wanna share some popcorn?” you asked looking over at him and he nodded swiftly.

The two of you sat towards the back, popcorn in your hands as he carried the drink, he had gotten two straws and he was mentally flippingggg out. Seriously he couldn’t believe how lucky he was, he could hardly contain his excitement as you both settled in your seats. The lights dimmed and the movie started. You glanced at him hands coming together to clap silently showing you were just as excited though probably for the movie and not about him. Donnie didn’t think too hard about that though, not letting anything ruin his mood even his own thoughts. He took off his gloves thinking in the dark you wouldn’t notice, and hoping for the off chance of reaching for popcorn at the same time. What?! Donnie liked all the clichés! And it happened more than once and each time it felt like electricity, you were too occupied with the movie though. Hardly noticing while it was all he could notice, your fingers were so soft!

Once the popcorn was finished Donnie started to actually watch the movie. Every now and then he’d glance over and watch your reactions of awe and wonder at the big screen. He would smile to himself, and go back to watching until he felt a nagging thought. He wanted to make a move, flirt back like you had at the bakery. He took a deep breath and moved his arm to go around your shoulders, and you leaned in closer his way almost immediately. Mission accomplished!!!!!!! And he was chewing on his lower lip to keep from smiling like an idiot or worse squealing with excitement.

When the movie was done and the credits started rolling you slowly stood, stretching. The movie had been a long one but that just meant Donnie got even more time with you. “That was awesome!” You said as you turned to him, the purple turtle had quickly put on his gloves and replied, “yeah the cgi was incredible!” The two of you walked out of the theater, talking about favorite scenes and characters. “This was really fun Donnie!” You said thanking him once out on the sidewalk. “Thanks for coming with me I had an equally great time,” Donnie said unable to help his bright smile.

He breathed in through his nose again as he rallied his courage. “Can I get your number?” You asked holding out your phone with a slight blush dusting your cheeks. You had beat him to it!! Donnie laughed saying those exact words and you giggled and watched him type in his number. “I’ll see you later then, Y/n!” Donnie waved as you started walking backwards waving back and thanking him again for a great night. He watched as you turned and walked until you were out of view, taking a corner and disappearing behind a building.

Donnie had happy feet! And he jumped up fist bumping the air. “Fibonacci!!!” He practically hollered in victory, walking no skipping, the opposite way you went, entering an alleyway and shooting up to the sky, flying with his tech. He raced all the way home to the lair. “Well well well, look who it is,” Leo said as Donnie entered the abandoned subway. “Surprise surprise,” Donnie waved his hands sarcastically, as he took off his gloves. “Where were you brother of mine?” Leo questioned coming up and wrapping an arm around Donnie’s neck. “Just out and about,” Donnie droned as he tried walking to his lab. Then his phone buzzed and he immediately pulled it out forgetting about Leo.

‘Made it home!! Hope you did too, just in case you hadn’t heard me the first two times 😂 I had an amazing time 😊 goodnight Donnie’ - y/n 💜

Leo gasped into Donnie’s ear and the purple turtle turned dark green. “YOU!” Leo said loudly catching the attention of Mikey and Raph. “SHUT UP!” Donnie screeched as he tried to push Leo away but Leo’s grip only tightened and he grabbed for Donnie’s phone. “Guys you won’t believe what I just saw!!” Leo said goading his brothers to come see. Mikey was up and bouncing towards them in seconds, “ohhhh what, what is it?!” he said as he watched his older brothers struggle. Donnie trying to keep his phone away while Leo trying and succeeding in capturing it. “LEO!” Donnie hollered and stomped his foot down on his blue brother’s.

Leo yelped hopping on one foot and dropping Donnie’s phone. Donnie lunged for it but Mikey was faster, and as soon as he got the phone he was off running to Raph who was laughing at the whole thing. “MIKEY!” Donnie yelled running after him telling him to stop. This went on for a while before all his brothers knew of Y/n and he ended up confessing about the amazing date he had just went on. All brothers listened intently, teasing him here and there but ultimately super proud of their genius brother. “So when we meeting???” Leo said curiously, “and when are you gonna tell them you’re a turtle?” Raph said eyebrows going up.

“Problems for a later time,” Donnie said waving his hand and with his phone back in his possession he headed for his room. He realized he had yet to text you back!

‘I made it home too, sorry for the late reply my brothers bombarded me 💀, we should definitely have another night like tonight 😁 goodnight Y/n!’ - donnie

He landed on his bed, closed his phone and rolled around too excited to do anything else. He couldn’t wait to take you out for another date. Hoping this would become a recurring occurrence in his life. He couldn’t wait and immediately started thinking up other date ideas, kicking his feet out happily.

#rise donnie x reader #rise donatello #donatello hamato #donatello x reader #tmnt donnie #rise of the tmnt #rise turtles #tmnt fandom #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #donnatello #rise tmnt oneshot #rottmnt oneshot #tmnt oneshot #turtle bros #leonardo #mikey #raph #tmnt fluff #tmnt 2018 #donnie x y/n

[cemeterything]

james!! on the topic of dying, there's a really fascinating & lovely (and v easy to read!!) book called "being mortal" by atul gawande that i super super strongly recommend!! especially if you're interested in (a) the history & evolution of how we die in the west (and vs in the rest of the world - author is south asian) due to industrialization, and (b) how we might improve our approach to mortality & think about it differently. it's the best kind of non-fiction that mixes bits of memoir with history and science. it might sound bare miserable BUT it is not!! it's a fucking bangin read honestly

thank you so much! i will definitely check that out

#death

[weezardthewizard]

My take on the Voynich Manuscript:

It was written by someone who was literate (obviously), artistically skilled, and knowledgeable in a wide range of subjects. Like a proto-Galileo.

It was written partially in abbreviated Latin. Up until very recently, anyone with a Western formal education worth its salt knew Latin.

The author was extremely bright and had a formal Western education at the very least. Likely came from a wealthy family and/or had a rich benefactor. They were important enough that their name and title are possibly still written down somewhere.

It was written partially in Old (High?) German, some 300 years after the language had evolved into Middle High German. Correct me if I'm wrong. That's the equivalent of someone today being fluent in Early Modern (Shakespearen) English. Certainly not impossible, but not something a layman would easily understand.

The author has spent an extensive amount of time studying old texts. Shit that's hard to get your hands on. This person was a scholar that had access to an impressive library.

The Old German/Latin abrv. mishmash is written out phonetically using a version of the old Turkic alphabet. That's kind of vague as hell and covers a huge timespan. Looks like Manichaean script to me, but I'm sure as shit no historical linguist. If anyone knows what it is, that could help us narrow down the timeframe.

The mid-east was bangin around this era. It was THE hot spot for discovery and innovation for pretty much anything.

The author was a polyglot who knew at least two archaic writing systems. They were either well-traveled or had sweet sweet neworking connections to the cool acedemics out east. Specifically: access to their rare books.

The book is coded, presumably to keep the information out of the hands of anyone without the cipher. This makes me think occult, so I'm inclined to believe the alchemist angle. A court alchemist would have access to the crown's deep pockets and private libraries. The coding would conceal any work a benefactor might find scandalous or heretical.

We have a rough timeframe. Finding the author is now a process of eliminating people who wouldn't have access to the knowledge and resources necessary to code the book. So, how many kingdoms in Europe had court alchemists, global connections, and the money to throw around for research? How many of those alchemists studied these subjects?

#mystery files #it might also be worth searching the illustrations for insignias of either the benefactor or occultist group the author belonged to #the voynich manuscript #watcher #watcher entertainment #linguistics #historical linguistics

[rsbigbang]

Behind the Bang Episode 11: Rock Star Sirius? That's Canon, Baby

For this episode on the Behind the Bang podcast Em and Molly talk to Lau (@sorenphelps) about illustrating two fics: Crazy Ex Boyfriend (by @amethystheart2421) and Fall For Me (by @nikialexx)! (Lau has also written extensively about her process for both fics, here and here!)

We had so much fun FINALLY getting to talk about a published R/S Big Bang fic. Hopefully we'll get to talk to more of our wonderful authors and artists in future episodes — until then, keep on bangin'!

#r/s big bang #behind the bang #Spotify

[majicmarker]

What’s love at first sight without a little crisis of sexual identity?

Milo Lamoree is livin’ the glamorous life of a sex shop sales rep, forever explaining to grown adults what they should and should not be sticking inside of themselves and/or others. He’s not doing any sticking himself—his demisexuality hasn’t exactly enticed any “hot young singles in your area.” But considering his clientele’s whackadoo misconceptions about anatomy, etc., it’s not like Milo has the leftover energy to fall in love, anyway.

…Well, too bad.

Stevie Hart has heard it said that being bisexual means you have more options, meanwhile she has experienced that not at all. Her love life is all unsolicited—ahem—pics (you know the ones) and straight couples looking for an experimental third. No thanks. When you’re already managing your own debilitating agoraphobia, who has time to deal with whatever’s going on with those people? Falling in love isn’t worth the mess.

…Until it is.

Along with their meddling mutual friends, Possibly The Worst Ex In The World, and a totally bangin’ soundtrack, Stevie and Milo hit every major identity crisis (sexual, spiritual, existential, you get it) on their way to finding each other—and themselves.

(And if they happen to also find the best title of an adult film while they’re at it? That’s just the rainbow sprinkles on top.)

Inspired by the author’s time working at an adult boutique, this slice-of-life romantic comedy contains explicit language, frank discussion of sex toy maintenance/operation and similar topics, and only slightly fictionalized customer stories—because you really can’t make this stuff up.

what’s your vibe? is now available all over the place!

cover design by @redbelles (open for commissions!)

#a/n #book tag: wyv #demisexuality #ace spec #indie romance #authors on tumblr

[herembers]

Do you have any fic recs? Fuu x Mugen or otherwise because I am absolutely in love with your writing style and prose but have read everything at least thrice AND counting. So I am so sure your faves will also be bangin'! Also am about to check out that controversial fuugen fic you posted about!!!

Huge content warning on the controversial one as it contains dubcon/underage elements so if that bothers you…tread lightly!

A Treatise on the Price of Sugar in the Edo Period (1603-1867)

And here are some more! Not comprehensive by any means, these are just the ones that first popped into my mind:

Finding the Four-Eyed Samurai...With You?! - this one is a given but I’ll recommend it until my dying breath. Post-canon, in-depth historical research, fantastic storytelling. Chefs kiss. Linking the Ao3 version as those are the chapters the author has re-written, but there’s way more on FF that she is working on eventually re-writing. (I also love her to pieces she’s on here as @ryukyuan-sunflower !)

Though the Heavens Fall - another longtime favorite that is sadly unfinished but worth checking out.

Opportunity and Motive - a quick two parter.

Birthdays - short and sweet, the third chapter is so so so cute.

Birthday Booty - my one modern AU recommendation 🥲 (There’s just so few… I’m really doing my part in the fandom lol) Hear me out on this one: it is hilarious and surprisingly cute? Mugen cracks me up in it he’s so gross. I also think the author nailed their personalities. Jin gets the short end of the stick per usual but it’s funny anyway.

My apologies if you’ve read these already—the fandom is small!



#asks #fuugen #fic stuff

[nosolaceofastraightanswer]

nine people i’d like to know better!!

idk if i have nine people but i’ll try lol!!

tagged by @creepy-not-crawly <3333 tysm. sorry i took so long lmaooo.

last song i listened to?

my 2021 beach bunny obsession lives on in my almost 42 hours playlist of all the songs i like

currently watching?

kiko and the age of the wonderbeasts. i saw it on netflix and so far it’s pretty bangin. the art style is really cool, and it’s very pretty to look at in general

currently reading?

fanfic-wise i’m rereading Broken Clocks by Gin_Juice on ao3, they are one of my favorite authors and definitely my favorite in the tua fandom. they have a very distinct writing voice and incredible dialogue. the most impressive thing about their writing imo is how they incorporate original characters in a very skillful way, where they don’t feel out of place in-universe. sorry for the rant lol i just love their stuff

in terms of actual books, i’m in between books right now and trying to focus on summer work (:/) but i hopefully will get back into the swing soon.

current obsession?

long term is tua please help i can’t leave someone needs to put me down

but my short term obsession right now is dead end paranormal park, specifically courtney. omfg. i can’t believe the third season was canceled ughghghg. anyway she’s literally an icon and THE MUSICAL EPISODE!!!??!? HELLO?!??! somewhere down there makes me so sick /pos. i feel like i’m going insane. PLEASSEEE whoever’s in charge put the songs on spotify. please. i’m begging.

TAGGING!!! all of my beloved mutuals ily guys sm. no pressure!!!!

@dead-peppermint

@princessofshazabah

@stdneyelyse

@waitupimalittleslow183

@cardigan-ns

@someominousecho

okay so i have six but that’s over halfway!!! we are slaying tonight besties!!! okay guys have a wonderful day <3333 and thanks so much for tagging me @/creepy-not-crawly

#solmisc #nine people i’d like to know better

[lemonhemlock]

I don't see why we as green fans can't complain or say anything at all about Aemond's characterization and the overuse of certain tropes in fics when black fans do it all the time also?? Be it Aemond/OC, Aemond/Rhaena, Aegon fics paired with OCs or team black characters like Baela, Daemon/Alicent or even pure time travelling crackships like Aemond/Sansa or Sansa paired with any team green guy (yes some of them have complained about this as well because allegedly if Sansa were to time travel back in the Dance era she would only fall in love with Jace! Fine! But guess what no team black stan who has complained about this aspect has written or comissioned a fic with her and their guy, they just complain that the already existing ones aren't about what they want) and they will always find time to lash out on their accounts about how the evil green authors are mischaracterizing the team black OCs or already existing characters. At least we are not leaving hate comments or criticism that nobody asked for (or I hope no one does this! Please don't!) on the fics we read and were disappointed by (and didn't even mention them as examples in these asks).

Anonymous asked: okay i’m game for some anti-lucemond inbox antagonism. while op did indeed make some good points regarding the formulaic nature of aemond x OC i still contend they do not know the difference between a minor character and a plot device. helaena is a minor character, the cargyll twins are minor characters, laenor is a minor character, heck with a bit of massaging and extrapolating harwin could be consider a minor character. Unlike strong boy #2 at least I can say what they were doing between their respective time jumps. helaena — having babies, enjoying her bugs cargylls — aegon watch + introspection which results on them being on different sides laenor — fighting in wars, hanging with his boyfriend, parenting (?) harwin — bangin’ rhaenyra, being a goldcloak, preparing to take on a lordship (just cause harrenhall is practically unliveable doesn’t mean they don’t have peasants in the vicinity to tax I suppose idk) These are characters. They have jobs and hobbies, actual relationships. lucerys in contrast, what has he being doing for the 6 years during the time skip. training? possibly, all we know about him is that he gets his ass handed to him in a fight and gets seasick. what are his hobbies? does he have any responsibilities? friends? anything? I will grant he seems to have a decent grasp of HV. during the incident Aemond in his anxiety starts giving his command in English whereas Luke maintains HV when commanding Arrax, for all the good that it did. maybe there is something there, but I don’t want to read into it too much it because it was likely more for the audience than a way to develop the characters because those are commands not sentences, like jace was working on. Speaking of Jace, even he has something going for him, minor though it was — he trains, attends meetings, is not doing so good in his LOTE classes, really doesn’t like his stepdad, still cannot take a joke. Jace has some serious emotional problems which could be worth exploring, but Lucerys? Nothing, nada, zilch. Who is this person It seems Lucerys only role was to gas up rhaenyra; just so we in the audience know she is in fact perfect, make this face ☹️ in the background of scenes, smirk one time like a asshole, and then die. he is not a character, and while I initially had no problem with him, beyond a mild distaste because he hurt aemond (I actually put more blame on Jace) the way TB started riding this non entity so hard for the last year just made me loathe lucerys. Lucemond can occasionally be fun. I like the fics which are just absurd AUs but anyone who actually takes it seriously. The folks who insist on ‘Fated Feud’ or whatever it’s called, are reaching so hard they might tear something, pretending there is any chemistry or motivation for this relationship. And don’t get me started on the ones who call Luke the pearl of driftmark, that makes me want vom. But people need to quit pretending Lucerys is something other than a plot device, first blood in the DoD, that is all. I hope him and this ship goes away soon. [anyway sorry you’ve got to be the repository for this nonsense. How do you like your aegond? The thing which should have been the main mlm ship for this ridiculous fandom.]

ironically this is probably exactly the type of content the previous anon wanted to avoid 😂 but you can't expect to go in someone's inbox looking for drama, stirring the hornets' nest so to speak, and not expect a reaction. surely everyone can deal with their inbox messages whichever way they want, on the spectrum of not bothering to react at all vs ranting about it. i don't subscribe to this idea that you should hold your mouth shut and refrain from any kind of critical diatribe bc the other side might see it and might be up in their feelings about it.

absolutely not referring to vitriolic hateposting or other forms of bullying, but the institution of the Rant is sacred and must be protected. you can be annoyed at some fandom stuff and simply want a space to air out those thoughts - ofc you're going to be posting in designated fandom platforms, bc it looks deranged to complain about this IRL. i feel that people need to accept that users should have their own barbie playground, but, equally, there should be some spaces (keeping a respectful distance ofc) where criticism or just random rants about that thing can happen, undoubtedly respecting the parameters of decency and not resorting to crazy insults

i agree (and this is a v important caveat) that it becomes bizarre when it's the same people doing it every day, bc then it turns into an unhealthy hyperfixation which you might want to interrogate, but once in a while it can be cathartic, like shooting the shit with your bffs. moderation is key to everything, we can all co-exist and get along without taking everything to heart

this isn't even about lucemond, honestly, it's more of a general fandom criticism, because this is not the first time i've encountered people who simply refuse to mute the tags, willingly read the anti posts, find themselves irked by something, then vent their frustrations on OP

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

as for luke being a plot device vs a minor character, i can't say i''m too bothered about that distinction to argue either way. minor characters can also be plot devices and he is effectively fridged for rhaenyra's and jace's) pain. i do think he has more going for him in the show, like they really tried to give him more screen time towards the end and focus a little on his supposedly conflicting feelings about inheriting driftmark & his bastardy

anyway the "how do you like your aegond" sent me 🤣 i'm really drawn to modern setting AUs for some reason! the constraints of modern society are like a breeding ground for angst

#anyway idk how this reads but i promise i'm not up in arms abt it #i'm honestly more amused than anything #anti lucemond #fandom critical #ask #anon

[lockwood-ot3]

Author Spotlight: TheMalapert

It is extremely difficult to choose a handful of TheMalapert's fics to highlight - I really, truly, recommend you read through their entire set of works.

Waltz in Four is an incredible series that takes us through cot3 basically commissioning Kipps to Dom for them from time to time, and the progression of those relationships. I'm including it here because of the strong cot3 vibes, though it could arguably be called cot4 (pretty sure TheMalapert is responsible for kicking off the small cot4 craze in our part of the fandom - thanks babe <3). Some really incredibly hot scenes, coupled with bangin' characterization, relationship progression, and a depth and texture to the storytelling. Still in progress, TheMalapert continues to up the ante, most recently with Concerto, featuring Kippswood (with a belt, kill me) and a seriously hot, realistic CNC scene.

Karim Family Christmas: Lucy pretends to be George's girlfriend for George's family - shenanigans ensure. Amazing, lovely peek into George's family with all the nuance, chaos, inside jokes that come with it, coupled with said family misinterpreting the relationships between our cot3. Hilarious, sexy, fun <3

George Sandwich, a part of the Bodega Series: Fantastic, smutty, ghosts-made-them-do-it fic written from an absolutely spot-on George POV. I especially love the brilliant way the author weaves together the heady overwhelm of the influence of the ghosts with George's own internal attraction and serious case of jealousy.

From the author:

Tell us about what inspired one of your fics? I’m very inspired by tropes in general which is why you’ll see so many shorter trope interpretations from me, but more specifically—My fic Karim Family Christmas is heavily influenced by a family of engineers I’m very close to. They even have the parents are engineers/4 siblings and 3 of those are engineers thing going on, so it was a lot of fun exploring how George’s background might be similar to those maniacs.

Fave headcanon about L&Co? I don’t write with it a whole lot, but I love Dad!Barnes. Just adults helping the iron trio in general, to be honest. I feel like that’s my way of projecting how I’m an adult and oh my god someone help these poor teenagers please.

If we like your fics, we should also read… (your recommendations): Frankly anyone on this list. I read and love them all, but I have been particularly obsessed with @waiting-for-my-hogwarts-letter's Sink or Swim.

What’s next for you? Waltz in Four always has something in my WIPs, so don’t expect it to go away any time soon. I also have a Holly Sandwich ft Lucy/Holly/Kat for all those sapphics who follow my bodega series! So I guess the answer is lots of smut!

#george karim #lockwood ot3 #lockwood & co #lucy/lockwood/george #lucy carlyle #anthony lockwood #lockwood and co #poly cot3 #cot3 #lockwood fanfic #lockwood fic rec #lockwood and co fanfiction #cot4 #author: TheMalapert

[mermaidsirennikita]

super random but can you rec some historical romances with plus sized heroines? I feel like so many heroines are skinny, which is fine, but as a plus sized woman it’s annoying to never see yourself in these stories

It def sucks. I feel like it's sometimes hard to tell, too, if the heroine is supposed to be fat or if it's like an insecurity and she's just lush~? Older historical writers, as much as I love many, write more skinny heroines, and more recent authors are somewhat ambiguous. HR heroines don't have as much body diversity, from what I've seen, as contemporary heroines. Which is ironic.

Try:

Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake by Sarah MacLean. MacLean writes several plus sized heroines; she's very good at it. This book has Callie feeling insecure about her weight at first, but uhhhh he is intooooo her. The degree to which Ralston is physically attracted to her ... it's huge. One thing that really gets me about MacLean's fat heroines is that there's no "he loved her for her spirit", like these men wanna HIT IT.

Other MacLeans that I remember having plus-sized heroines:

A Rogue by Any Other Name--my favorite MacLean. It's really not *a thing* in the book like it is with Nine Rules, but to me it was pretty clear that Penelope is plus sized.

Brazen and the Beast--Hattie is a badass who ties the hero up a couple times. Notable in that a plus size model is on the cover.

Knockout, out in August, also has a plus heroine with a plus model on the cover. I'm so excited about it.

The Truth About Cads and Dukes by Elisa Braden has a plus heroine who has glasses and is plain and that is one thing that I kind of ding the book for, because her appearance is a big insecurity for her for a while and I don't love that... But the hero's like, obsessive lust for her help makes up for it. It's a marriage of convenience and he's convinced that if he loses it on her he'll lose his sense of control, but also. He wants it.

Currently reading Her Husband's Harlot by Grace Callaway, and the heroine is def convinced that she's too fat, but I can't tell if she is fat or if she's just bangin' lol.

Not a heroine, but Bonny in Something Fabulous by Alexis Hall is a hero in a m/m book who is described as soft and probably on the plus size side (the cover doesn't reflect this), and he's a bit insecure about it. And his hero is like, wildly attracted to him.

#romance novel blogging #book recs

[tmntxthings]

Haiiii! I was just wondering if you could do rise!turtles x gn!reader who has trouble eating? Like they don’t have an eating disorder, their body just doesn’t like to have food in it and makes them feel sick, so they take medicine to help them eat? Maybe it’s how the boys react to finding this out?

Food Issues

author’s note: lovely anon thank you for requesting and sorry for the wait <3 hopefully this is what you were thinking of c: this one hit a little close to my heart

warnings: eating issues, fluff, angst, comfort, unedited

—————————————————————————

Raphael

Raph had kicked everyone out of the lair that night (except for dad ofc) because tonight was date night and Raph had been cooking up an idea, quite literally cooking hehe, he was fixing you an absolute bangin’ meal (and no it’s not pizza!)

He had searched up a whole bunch of date night menus and settled for something on the easier side since he wasn’t super confident in his cutlery skills. Chicken Alfredo pasta was on the menu tonight at the lair and it was finally done! Raph set the table, poured some soda in glasses and also took out some water too (options!)

Raph couldn’t stop his smile as he heard you call out, “Raph?” He looked back at the set table, he had chosen to sit the two of you closer together rather than across the table like the movies. Plates full of pasta! It all looked perfect, “Hey! I’m coming,” he said as he went to you

You were beautiful everyday but today in particular Raph noticed how much effort you had put into yourself for date night, you smiled warmly at him, your hair looked so soft, as it framed your face, you were glowing in a stunning outfit and Raph pulled you in for a hug, happy to see you

“You’re taking my breath away,” Raph said twirling you in a circle as he hugged you tight, you blushed “you do the same!” You said as you hugged him back just as tightly, “so date night?” you asked as he set you back on your feet

“Yes! I’ve got a bunch of stuff prepared,” Raph beamed as he took your hand and led you to the table, “I made us a meal first, then we can do whatever you want! I’ve got movies or games, or anything else you can think of!” he was so excited as he pulled out your chair for you, “thank you” you smiled as he sat down next to you

“Wow Raph! This looks amazing!” And it really did, your heart panged knowing you wouldn’t be able to eat all of this. Much less it would probably be a couple of bites since you hadn’t even thought to take your medicine today, you were in such a rush once you looked at how little time you had left after getting dressed and doing you hair, you’d spent about 2 hours in the shower!

Raph smiled at your compliment and started to dig in, he hoped it tasted as good as it looked and to him nothing seemed out of the ordinary, he felt relief he really didn’t want to mess up date night, the conversation flowed as Raph ate, and you pushed the food around with your fork, taking occasional bites hoping Raph wouldn’t notice

But since Raph had cooked this meal he was very much aware that you weren’t eating, “is it not good?” he sighed putting his fork down, he had cleaned his plate and you still had more than half of the portion of pasta he had put on your plate, “oh no Raph, that’s not it at all, your pasta is really good,” you tried reassuring him but he didn’t believe you, even as you forced another bite down

“I’m sorry I just, I’m not hungry… I didn’t take my meds before I left,” you admitted to him and now he looked a little concerned, “what do you mean Y/n?” You put the fork down and turned to him, “I don’t really eat much, so when I do I need to take this medicine or else I get really sick” and as soon as you said the word a wave of nausea rolled through you. You shot up to your feet, “Raph” desperation in your eyes, “I’ll be right back, I’m really sorry”

You held your hand to your mouth as you booked it to the nearest bathroom, almost not making it as you gagged into your hand, then slumping down to your knees as you held the toilet bowl and puked the few bites of alfredo you had eaten, tears streaming down your face, you had totally ruined date night and hurt Raph’s feelings on top of that!

You heard a soft knock on the door before Raph entered the bathroom and another onslaught of puking came up, he held your hair back and rubbed circles on your back, trying to soothe you, “Y/n you could’ve told me, I wouldn’t have felt bad! Especially now since the consequence is you hurting,” the both of you stayed in the bathroom for a while, until the puking finally subsided and you were trembling with dried tear stains down you cheeks

“I’m sorry,” you said after you had rinsed your mouth out with water and brushed your teeth (yes you had a spare toothbrush at the lair) “Nothing to apologize for Y/n, I just want you feeling better,” Raph hadn’t known anything about your eating issues and once you had told him, all those other times of hanging out and you rarely eating clicked, it seemed so obvious now

“Do you wanna go lay on the couch and watch movies?” he asked, holding your hand and smiling softly down at you, “I’d love that,” you nodded and the two of you cuddled up watching Lou Jitsu

Leonardo

“Say what?” Leo asked, needing a repeat of all of what you had just said, you groaned of course he’d make you repeat everything, “I’m not feeling so good today, but it’s not a big deal you don’t need to come and check on me,” you said into the phone. It was silent, “hmmm I think I shall come over, to help in your hour of need!”

“Leo, did you not just hear me?! I said-“ Leo cut you off and you groaned inwardly, “yes yes I know, but wouldn’t you feel way better way faster if your boyfriend was there taking care of you?” He didn’t know why he had to spell this out to you, he was coming and that was final! Of course he’d be there even if it was some crazy bad sickness

“Okay you stubborn blue turtle!” You quipped not even knowing why you dared try to stop him in the first place, once he got an idea, Leo was a force to be reckoned with, an unstoppable train wreck, “do you want me to bring anything in particular? what exactly is wrong?” his voice went serious towards the end, “it’s just my stomach,” you tried to sound light but Leo replied, “isn’t the stomach like a second brain or something?!” he wondered how much truth you were telling him and if he should be more worried

“I’ll be there soon,” Leo said in a hurry and promptly hung up. You fell back in your bed, you had been spewing up your guts all morning and when Leo had called wanting to go out and do something you had to say no, to which he whined and demanded for a good reason as to why, to which well it was already stated previously… thankfully the nausea had passed but your stomach was cramping and you knew you were dehydrated

“This is the worst,” you said feeling emotional as tears welled up in your eyes, sometimes you wished life was simpler, that you could eat whatever you wanted without consequences and didn’t have to constantly think about when your next refill of medicine would be ready, you blew out a breath telling yourself not to cry, it would be your luck that Leo would burst through the door the second the tears started falling

“Alright I’ve got Jupiter Jim and Lou Jitsu, what do ya wanna watch first?” It was crazy how you just knew he would barge in as soon as you had thought of the blue devil, you smiled as you sat up on your elbows looking at him, arms full of movies. “You pick,” and so he had Jupiter Jim Saves the Galaxy 4 in and running in no time

He got into bed with you, lying back on his shell as his arms went back, one behind his head, and the other pulling you in close. You followed suit snuggling into his side and making his heart melt into goo. When the first movie ended, neither of you got up when the credits started rolling and Leo asked, “do you know why your stomach hurts?”

He was peering down at you and you were looking up at him through your lashes, “yes..” you said softly when you didn’t continue Leo waited, “i ate something awhile ago and it didn’t agree with me, but I’m used to it” you sighed

He patted your tummy gently, “that sucks” and he looked so sad while saying it but you stifled a laugh, his word choice was always so straightforward, “yeah it really does” still trying to keep it together, you shook your head at him before sliding out of bed

“What I meant to say was..” Leo said watching you go to the tv, but you waved your hand telling him it was alright, “I know what you meant,” you gave him a smile then turned back to the movie selection.

“Alright you had your movie now my turn but I’ll be nice and let you choose out of my two options,” Leo smirked waiting for his two choices, though if he was a betting turtle… “let me guess,” he said as you simultaneously said “twilight.” Leo threw up his hands he had just known that was your first pick. Then you continued on your own “or sonic the hedgehog?” Leo thought for a split second “too easy, BLUE DEVIL!”

Donatello

Donnie knew something was up with you, because it just didn’t seem possible to him that you had only eaten one meal together in the entire span of your relationship which was 6 months 21 days 7 hours and 8 seconds.. 9.. 10 well you get the point, the two of you were going strong. But only a one, singular time you ate?

Yes, according to his calculations he should’ve seen you eat something 3 out of the 6 months at least, this seemed to be a big staple in relationships, well the internet said so. Donnie spun around in his chair thinking a mile a minute. He wondered if perhaps you could be embarrassed to eat in front of him, that seemed to be legit because a lot of people anonymously confided to that on the wide web.

But Donatello had continued to do research on this because first of all he didn’t like having only one option, six more and he’d start feeling like he was getting somewhere, by the third he came across illnesses or more along the line of stomach issues, he frowned why did he have a sinking feeling… maybe it was just the thought of thinking that this could possibly be true and that made Donnie sad

Yeah that was it, just the possibility because surely…hopefully you didn’t suffer from this, he wouldn’t wish it on anyone, and for you, he winced now he needed to know the remedies, just in case of a worse case scenario. Donnie stopped spinning, and continued researching.

“Y/n?” Donnie said quietly into his phone, “Heyy Dee, I just finished up some studying and was about to head over!” Well he could wait til you got here, it was probably a conversation better in person. “Okay sounds great,” though to you Donnie sounded far off, like he hadn’t really heard what you said

“You okay Donnie?” and he blinked, gripping the phone tighter, “just contemplating some things,” he managed to say, he predicted that he was gonna have to spill over the phone rather than what he wanted to do, wait for your arrival to go down on his knees and ask a million questions and then comfort you with a million solutions

“Contemplating what?” You became very serious because you had a feeling something was wrong, “what’s going on Donnie?” the seconds of silence broke as Donnie sighed into the phone, “Y/n, I’d much rather have this conversation in person but I think I’ve made the situation seem a lot more dire than it really should be”

You listened intently, as Donnie kept going, he was on a roll, in a monologue, “I was doing some research on what couples usually do together and a lot of that had to deal with eating and it made me realize you don’t eat in front of me and then I continued to research as to why some people don’t eat in front of others,”

He took a deep breath and continued, “among many other options one stuck out to me, stomach issues in lament terms, and I think this is the reason why but I want to be wrong, I want you to tell me I’m wrong but even if I’m right I want you to know that they have solutions out there and you don’t have go through this alone!”

The line went quiet as Donnie calmed himself, and went back to steady breathing, “…Y/n?” He winced wondering if he had just metaphorically dived head first off the London bridge. “I’m still here, you just amaze me sometimes” you said warmly now that you had caught up to speed with what was eating at Donnie’s mind. “You’re right, I do have said issues and I already have medicine that helps, it still hurts at times though,”

Donnie smiled in relief no jumping off of bridges, “we can talk about it more when you get here and hopefully with the help of science we can figure out a better solution than the medicine you’re taking,” you smiled tears in your eyes, of course he would do everything in his power to help you the second he found out.

Michelangelo

“Alright!!! Pizza’s here” Mikey hollered but it wasn’t needed because everyone was already waiting at the table. “About time!” Raph complained as he eyed the boxes Mikey was carrying hungrily. “It was a new delivery person, they kept walking back and forth past the alleyway,” Mikey laughed as he placed the boxes on the center of the table.

Everyone was immediately reaching for the first box, opening it up and letting the aroma waft through the lair. “Smells so good,” Mikey’s mouth watered. Grabbing two slices, one for him, one for you before heading further down the table at where you sat.

“Gotcha a slice!” Mikey smiled as he handed you the plate. “Thanks Mikey, though I’m not really hungry” you smiled back at him, he was so kind you thought, always thinking of others.

“But you’ve been at the lair all day today!” Mikey said confused on how you weren’t absolutely starving like he was, like Raph was, like all of them were. You shrugged wanting to move past the topic, you hadn’t thought Mikey would think anything of it because it was your usual excuse!

“When did you last eat?” Mikey asked after swallowing a bite of pizza. He was looking at you with worried eyes. “I had something yesterday..” you admitted softly and by something you drank some water and managed to get down a granola bar.

Mikey was frowning, “don’t humans have to eat three times a day?” and you nodded, he finished off his pizza and thought, “do you not like pizza???” It hurt his heart to say, he couldn’t believe that they had someone out there who didn’t like pizza it was just too good, but maybe that’s why you never ate at the lair, the menu here was mostly different varieties of pizza.

“It’s not that I don’t like it,” you said “I just don’t have the appetite for really anything” you sighed to yourself. You guessed there was no point in lying, Mikey would’ve found out eventually the more the two of you hung out. “That can’t be good!” Mikey’s heart was hurting in a different way now, he couldn’t imagine not ever being hungry

“I get hungry sometimes” you tried to explain, “I just feel awful afterwards and it usually comes right back up..” it was pretty gross to talk about especially at the table with food around, but Mikey listened intently with sad eyes, “is there anything I can do?” he asked wanting to help if possible

Gosh he was so sweet, you smiled, “I can go back to my place and take some medicine that usually helps” Mikey stood wanting to come along, “I’ll go too! I’m pretty sure we’ll need more pizza anyways”

The two of you looked down the table to see four empty boxes, the only slice that had survived was sitting on your plate! You giggled the turtles sure had been hungry, “Yeah” you agreed, “and this time I’ll pay because I wanna get my favorite!”

“You have a favorite pizza?!” Mikey exclaimed, “well yeah when I do get a little peckish I’ll buy a supreme pizza with stuffed crust,” Mikey was licking his lips, “sounds delicious!” and so the two of you left the lair, talking about other favorite foods, Mikey was making a list in his mind, that way he’d always have a least something at the lair you would want to eat

#rise tmnt headcanons #rise turtles #rise leonardo #rise raphael #rise donatello #rise michelangelo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt #tmnt fandom #teenage mutant ninja turtles #turtle bros #mikey #donnatello #michelangelo #raph #leonardo #tmnt 2018 #tmnt donnie #leonardo hamato #leo #donnie #rottmnt x y/n #rottmnt x reader