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missathlete31 · 10 months

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Dead On Your Feet- Chapter 8

Link for Previous Chapters on my Masterlist Here

Chapter Summary: Maverick is a broken man after listening to Bradley and Jake’s planes go down, and he's not the only one.

This chapter takes a look at those left behind after Hangman and Roosters sacrifice, and how they are expected to go on.

Pete "Maverick" Mitchell has never been known for his patience.

Or his listening skills

Or his rule following

Or for obeying orders

Or really any trait that was actually worth a damn to getting promoted in the Navy. Hence why he was still only a Captain after all these years. In reality he should have been laid out to pasture decades ago, discharged after one too many buzzes around the tower or his stark refusal to accept any job that didn't involve flying. He assumes the list of men who have attempted to permanently ground him is long and distinguished but the ace Pete has had up his sleeve for so long has always managed to get him out of it. Iceman swooping in at the last second to remind the Top Brass why to keep a man like Pete Mitchell employed.

Because Maverick got results. He got successes. He got missions done.

That's what everyone was telling him today, with somber looks and half hearted handshakes. That the mission was complete despite the fact that two pilots never made it home. That the bitter pill of absolute and utter anguish Maverick was feeling should be looked beyond because four Americans did make it back and the Uranium plant was destroyed.

Take the win Maverick

As though Pete could ever think two empty caskets being prepped meant a win.

Especially his casket. Going into the ground under a tombstone labeled Bradshaw that was already more filled than it ever should be.

Pete was going to be sick. Again.

It had been over nine hours since the four Dagger Jets had flown from the carrier this morning. Eight and a half since only two returned. Maverick was stuck in Command during the mission, a fact he should have counted his blessings for according to Cyclone after the stunt he pulled stealing the plane, but it wasn't good enough for Pete, he longed to be in the air with the team.

But he was closing in on sixty years old now and he knew they were never going to let him fly; he was still surprised they even let him teach. Again he knew that was Ice's interference; meddling and hoping to kill two birds with one stone: give the pilots their best chance to make it back alive while simultaneously fix the rift between Mav and Bradley before the Admiral passed.

Ice's plan failed on both parts.

Bradley had tried to talk to him before he got into the plane, had stumbled over his words enough that Mav couldn't know if he was going to apologize or curse him out. Instead of listening Pete gave him a hearty shoulder pat and said later.

But now there would be no later.

Because Bradley didn’t make it home.

In a move that shocked the air from Maverick's lungs, Jake Seresin, aka Hangman of all people, took the missile meant for Rooster. The blonde pilot, notorious for leaving wingmen hanging in training, didn't even hesitate to fly himself over his teammate and take the shot that most likely would have killed the remaining living Bradshaw. Pete had had a split second of horrific relief when he heard on the radio what Seresin had done, had felt the stutter of his traitorous heart when he felt rejoiced that Bradley was still with him even though another pilot, another man, was most likely dead because of it. Fate whipped her cruel hand to repay him for it though as Bradley ignored Command's order to head back to the carrier and instead turned around to go back for his wingman. Then the calls that Dagger Two was down sounded.

Pete had lost it then.

Fritz had been the spare, sitting on the runway listening as his teammates were shot down and torn with indecision when he was ordered to stand down upon his request to provide backup. Maverick had come barreling out from the inside of the ship, screaming at the young pilot to do something despite Admiral Simpson’s consistent litany of no one else being put at risk. Pete was ashamed to remember when he cursed Lieutenant Avalone, telling him he was letting his friends die as Hondo all but carried him back inside and to his barracks. Mav would have to apologize eventually, when he was calmer, more professional. It wasn’t the kid’s fault.

No there was only one person to blame for what happened today and that was Pete. It was his team, his training, his responsibility to get the mission done and bring everyone home and he failed that objective, no matter what the Brass thought.

He sits in his room now, alone from the others, unable to face them and their grief while he himself is drowning in it. He can feel the ship moving once more, heading home, the search for what is left of Rooster and Hangman being left to an extraction team if approved from the higher ups. Maverick knows he won’t be allowed to partake in those discussions, he most likely lost his chance to even be in the Command room during it as well, but he doesn’t care; he won’t be able to stomach it anyway. This, losing Bradley, has finally broken him.

Pete has lost many people in his life: his father, his mother, Goose, Carole, Ice and after each one he has thought the world was over. He has thought he wasn’t strong enough to move on. Yet somehow, someway, Mav has looked at what he still has left and what he owes the people who have left him and he keeps going. He gets back up and he keeps being Maverick. But that can’t happen now. Losing Bradley is all he’s ever had left. Bradley was like a son to Pete in every way that has ever mattered. He has been the buoyancy that has kept Maverick afloat every time and now without him the waves have crashed and the older aviator is floundering. To be perfectly frank, he is finding it hard to come up with a reason to not fling himself into the Pacific right this second, joining all those he’s loved and who have left him.

"Mav” Hondo is knocking on his door, the only man brave enough to seek him out. “I brought you something to eat” the other man offers and if Maverick had any sort of manners left he would thank his long time friend. As it was he has nothing and he rebuffs Bernie with a coldness that the other man doesn't deserve. "I'm not hungry” Pete mutters, his body still slumped in the old mattress, his face buried. "Leave me alone."

"Mav-" with the patience of a saint, Hondo tries again, “open the door.”

"I said I'm not hungry."

The bespectacled man persists, his tone firmer, “open the door Mitchell” he orders, despite the fact that Maverick outranks him. Pete rolls over, ready to continue his game of paying Hondo no attention when he hears Bernie’s body smack the wood of the door frame. “Open it Captain Mitchell” the younger man warns, “before I break it down myself.”

Maverick groans but when another hit sounds, harder this time, he finally gets himself standing. “Alright” he hollers as what sounds like Hondo’s shoulder shudders into the wood, “I’m coming.”

He swings the door open, hoping to look pissed off or at least a little intimidating, but the way the younger man’s face falls, Mav has a feeling he just looks pitiful.

Hondo composes himself, giving his friend a look. “You need to eat something” Bernie explains, as he walks calmly into the room like he didn’t just threaten to beat the door down. He holds a tray, piled high with fruits and toast and other foods on the blander side. Considering Hondo had witness Pete throw up twice since Rooster was shot down (and there was an additional time he missed), it’s an incredibly touching gesture that reinforces the belief that Hondo is a better friend than Pete deserves.

“Thank you” Mav murmurs, softening from his annoyance at being bothered and leaving just the meekness of his grief, “you didn’t have to-“

“Of course I did” and Bernie moves to really look at the man, his gaze concerned. “I know you Maverick, and I know what’s in your head. You can’t do this to yourself.”

“Do what?” the shorter man asks flippantly, “I’m not doing anything” he shares, voice cracking ever so slightly, “I didn’t do anything for them.”

“This isn’t your fault.”

Maverick snorts “Then who’s is it Hondo?” he opens his arms as though waiting for the answers, “if it’s not mine than who’s-“

“No one’s” Bernie shares sadly, “it’s no one’s Pete, and that’s why it hurts the most.”

Pete shakes his head, turning away from Hondo and his levelheadedness. Maverick needs to feel this guilt, it’s the only feeling he has left anymore and he won’t let anyone take it from him. “I was in charge of training them, I was in charge of getting them all home and I failed!”

“You gave them their best chance” Hondo moves to the desk chair, taking a seat with a weary sigh as he watches Maverick begin to pace out his emotions. “That’s all anyone could ask of you.”

“It wasn’t good enough” Pete continues, moving to the plate of food that Bernie brought and slamming it down to the ground in anger, “I wasn’t good enough!”

Hondo doesn’t even blink as the shards from the plate nearly hit him, instead he keeps his voice calm as he addresses his friend, “You were the best choice for the job. You know that, I know that, Admiral Kazansky knew that. Warlock and Cyclone know it. The team knows it too. It’s how the miracles that did happen on this mission actually occurred. Because of your training Mav, no one else’s.”

“And it’s what ended up killing Hangman and R-Rooster” Pete’s green eyes are wet with tears but he makes no move to wipe them. “I laid into them every day about wingmen and not leaving each other behind and then look what happens. Look at what Bradley did-“ Maverick cuts himself off when the traitorous thought pops up once more in his mind; if only Rooster didn’t go back. The older aviator smacks himself hard in the head for even thinking it; for wishing that Bradley had been anything less than the man he was raised to be and left Hangman to die after Jake’s sacrifice. Pete smacks his hands into his face again, startling Bernie from his seat as the darker skinned man hurries forward to stop the older pilot’s attack on himself. “Pete stop!“

“NO!” Maverick shakes his friend’s hands off, pushing him back for good measure. Hondo stumbles back towards the desk chair, watching his friend with wide eyes and worry. “Don’t you see what I’ve done!” Maverick screams, “I taught Hangman to be a team leader and he took the hit for Bradley. He died for Bradley! And now I’m sitting here grieving and wishing in my goddamn black hole of a heart that Bradley had left him and listened to Cyclone and come home! That he didn’t die too! What kind of a monster am I?” Maverick cries, voice breaking loudly in the small room, “What kind of heartless bastard thinks this way!"

“You’re a grieving father Pete, you’re not a monster.”

“Bradley wasn’t-“ Mav manages to sniff back a sob, struggling to compose himself, “He wasn’t my son.”

“We both know that’s not true.”

Pete doesn’t argue, instead taking a deep shuddering breath, “what will Carole and Goose think” he asks desperately, emotions returning, “After everything I promised Carole? She begged me not to let him follow in his father’s footsteps. She begged me not to let history repeat-“

"Bradley Bradshaw was destined to be in the sky from the moment he was born” Hondo explains calmly, “nothing you or Carole did was ever going to stop that trajectory. You saw him up there, you knew he belonged and how he performed today was just more evidence that proved it. You can’t change destiny Pete, no matter how hard you try.”

“But Carole… and Goose-“

“-Are hopefully with their son again” Hondo’s eyes look suspiciously moist from behind his glasses. “If there is any comfort to be found in all this, can we at least hope for that?”

“He was too young” Pete shakes his head desperately, his body constricting with his sobs, “they were both too damn young! They had their whole lives-“

“And they lived them how they wanted. Right until the end.” Hondo moves closer now, taking Maverick into his arms and allowing the older man to succumb to his grief, the wetness spreading along Bernie’s shirt, “They died for their wingman. They died for each other. A move you would have done for every single man and woman you served with Pete. I know it hurts, I know it’s going to hurt for a while but be proud of the pilots you put into the sky today. Be proud of what they accomplished and what they were willing to sacrifice. They were already the best of the best but you Maverick” he pulled the man in question away so Bernie could meet Pete’s green eyes, “you made them better men.”

“Don’t-“ Pete warns, “don’t try to make me feel better, don’t try to absolve me-“

Hondo shakes his head, “I’m not Mav because there is nothing to absolve. Hangman taking the hit for Rooster was his decision, not yours. Just like Bradley going back for Jake was what he wanted to do."

Maverick shudders tearfully, “I wish I could have been up there with them, I would have taken the hit for any of them, died for any of them.”

“I know” Hondo admits, “I know.” He pulls him in closer, keeping a steady hand on the back of the dark-haired man’s head as his own tears start to fall. “And I know it hurts right now. And I know you feel alone but you’re not. I’m here: to listen, to talk or even to get more plates for you to destroy” he moves to see the smallest huff of amusement on Pete’s face, “but you need to let me in okay Mav? You are not shouldering this all alone. I’m not letting you.”

“Thank you Bernie” the grieving man whispers as the two men stand, broken in their sorrow, but at least together.

About an hour later, once Hondo is called back to deck and Pete finally manages to get his emotions under control, the older aviator leaves his room. He heads outside, finding the runway of the carrier empty now that the mission is officially deemed complete. Most of the crew has headed inside, only a select few remain for emergency purposes. No one bothers him; too busy looking at the woman sitting silently next to the railing of the carrier, facing the water but with her eyes on the clouds. The setting sun bathes her in it's orange glow, washing over her shuddered form.

Natasha was always a front runner for the mission, from the moment Pete first saw her fly. Confident, talented, and intelligent, she was a natural behind the stick of a plane. Then the birdstrike happened and Mav assumed Trace would be out of the running. But just like her call-sign, Phoenix rose from the ashes of the ejection and settled right back into the cockpit of the next plane, not even fazed. She was remarkable, in every possible way and yet here she sat, shocked silent with her grief as she stared up at the sky that had finally betrayed her and killed two of her own.

“Natasha?” Maverick begins, hoping not to startle. It’s all for naught though as the young woman’s body jumps at the new sound around her. She turns, finding her captain and standing suddenly before staggering off at the rush of altitude. Pete moves to help her but Natasha rights herself in time. She looks up and struggles to meet Mav’s gaze. He tries to offer some sort of look of comfort but he can’t seem to manage it, not that it matters, Phoenix’s own face is crumbling in shame and torment. “Sir” she mumbles softly, her confidence as shattered as her voice.

“Are you alright?” Pete can’t help the wince at his stupid question, no one is alright anymore.

“Sir,” she swallows a sob, “I- I don’t know how I can ever apologize enough-“

“You don’t have to apologize-“

“I left them” she interrupts and it’s heartbreaking to see Phoenix reduced to this: broken, and guilt-ridden and so lost. “I should have gone back.”

Maverick takes a step closer, putting his hands on each of the woman’s quivering shoulders. Instead of melting into his touch she just seems more off-kilter, almost as though expecting him to take a shot at her at any moment. Pete curses himself for taking all this time to grieve himself when his team was so clearly struggling. Nat has been sitting here for hours blaming herself, and instead of helping her, Pete was spending the same time doing the same. He sighs softly, vowing to make this right and beginning with Phoenix, “there was nothing you could have done for them Natasha” he tells her honestly.

“If I had turned around-“

“You could have been shot down as well. You and Bob. Your responsibility was in getting the two of you home and that is what you did. You can’t blame yourself for what happened.”

She looks at him, uncertainty on her features, as though she is still expecting him to be angry, “But-“

“You did everything you could Natasha, you need to know that.” He offers his arms and the younger woman collapses into his embrace, “I miss them” she whispers devastatingly, “I miss them so much.”

“I know honey, I do too.” Pete turns tearfully to the skies, closing his eyes and wishing that Hondo’s words before were true, that Bradley was with his parents once more in heaven, safe, and in no pain, Jake with them too.

A throat clearing behind them startles both pilots, Mav whirling around to see Javy Machado heading over with two water bottles in his hands. “Coyote was sitting out here with me” Nat explains as she released herself from Mitchell's arms to take the drink from the new arrival. “We’ve been sharing stories-“

“About our idiot best friends” the younger man finishes, noticing the familiar haunted look on Maverick’s face and giving him a small nod in camaraderie.

“Embarrassing ones” They can all hear the effort Phoenix gives as she tries to let out a small chuckle, “I learned that during a prank war during one of his deployments, Jake’s shampoo got blue dye put in” her eyes brighten just the tiniest bit, “Coyote said he was livid.”

“He was” Javy shares, “He kept trying to hide under baseball hats or hoodies. He even debated shaving it since he couldn’t get any dye to change it back on the carrier. I swear” the man shakes his head fondly, “the only thing the man loves more than his hair is his skin care regime, he takes hours on it. It’s like an obsession at this point.“

Natasha nudges Machado softly, “all this blackmail material and you only tell me now, honestly Javy I’m disappointed in you-“ the minute the words leave her mouth the group sobers, the reminder of why Nat will never be able to use this information a punch in the gut. Maverick, desperate for the at least sad smiles from before, tries to push the two back into their good memories. “Any embarrassing stories about Rooster?” he asks.

“How much time do you have” Phoenix takes the bait, and the suffocating feeling of depression settles down a bit more once again. “Did you ever hear about the time he split his pants while performing?”

Despite all the turmoil of the day Maverick can’t help the surprise tittles of laughter that comes from his mouth at the image, “No way,” he argues good naturally, “how could he rip them?”

“Haven’t you noticed he never gets up from the piano bench now?” Phoenix’s tear-stained eyes are beginning to show some mirth as she gets into her story. “He used to always have little dances with his songs, really got into it. Then one night we are in some crowded open mic bar in the city and Bradley decides to perform. He’s moving and shaking and putting on this whole show” she smirks at the memory, “and then he tries to do some half split move and we all hear a tear.”

“God I wish I was there, must have been hilarious” Coyote jokes. Maverick nods next to him, “what did Bradley do?”

“He rushes off the stage in a huff, demands someone gives him a jacket or shirt to tie around and cover it and all but begs to head home” Phoenix laughs wetly, tears mixing down her face, “but the idiot ends up winning the contest anyway. The crowd loved it!” She gasps down a sob, “Bradley refused to take the trophy on principle but I took it for him. Still have it too.” Her face falls, “I’m going to miss his performances.”

“Me too” Javy shares, “I don’t think I can ever look at a piano without thinking of Rooster.”

“Or a dart board without thinking of Hangman.”

Maverick listens to the two and sighs, reaching for them both and placing comforting hands on their arms, “you both are good friends, they were lucky to have you.”

Natasha grimaces, emotions overwhelming her small frame, “no Sir, we were lucky to have them. Bradley, he- he was the best man I ever knew.”

“And Jake” Coyote's voice wobbles ever so slightly, his eyes brimming with tears, “I know what he came across like” the man turns from Phoenix back to Pete, “but you have to understand he just- he was always so afraid of being hurt by people close to him, he was afraid to let them in. But he wasn’t a bad guy” Javy’s body rocks with sobs, “he really wasn’t and he loved this team, even if he didn’t show it-“

“Didn’t show it?” Pete repeats, “Javy, Jake showed it by saving Bradley, by risking his life for this team. We all saw that today, the man Hangman truly was.” He watches Coyote give a tearful nod, “I’m so proud of Jake and Bradley for the way they flew today and you both should be too. They were heroes out there.” He’s about to say more when he notices a bang from the outside door, Hondo rushing towards them, out of breath and laboring “Maverick!” he hollers, and Pete feels something stirring in his gut, ”Mav we got something” the man continues.

“Got what?” his nerves are frayed enough already but he walks forward, yearning to catch the other man even quicker, “Bernie what is it?”

“It’s Rooster’s E-Sat.”

Ice floods Maverick’s veins, his breath leaving in such a rush he barely manages to get words out. “What- what about it?” he gasps.

Hondo’s face breaks out into a grin, “It’s live and showing he’s supersonic.”

Mav blinks once in confusion, but both Phoenix and Coyote seem to be ready to jump for joy at the news. “But how-” Pete swallows, throat achingly dry, “that would mean-“

“There’s an F-14 in the air” the bespectacled man explains, “We think he might have hijacked it.”

“Yes!” Natasha cheers behind them. Her entire body showing signs of life once more. “we need to get planes in the air” she all but demands turning to her two superiors but never cowering. The Phoenix reborn again, “We have to help him!”

“Wait” Pete’s mind is still struggling, almost as though afraid to get his hopes up all for it to come crashing down again. “An F-14? I didn’t even know Bradley could fly an F-14.”

“He can’t” Javy speaks up, wiping at the tears that are still rolling down his cheeks, “but Hangman can.”

”Hangman but he-“

”Trust me Sir” and it’s Coyote’s turn to brighten as Nat crashes into his chest with the powerful combination of happiness and hope, “if that plane is in the air, Jake’s at the stick.”

The group collectively heightens at the declaration, the words spurring them all. Mav turns back to his friend, his heart lighter than it’s been in decades, his mind clear. “Bernie” he all but begs, “get me into a Goddamn plane.”

“Admiral Simpson has ordered no launches until they get more information” but the other man is smiling slyly, “but I do know Lieutenant Avalone’s plane is still in the ready slot.”

“Convince the grounds crew to help me launch while I get suited up?”

“Done” and Hondo immediately goes to follow Mav’s directions. Pete goes as well, trying to think of where he could get a flight suit without Cyclone getting wind, when Machado steps forward. “Sir” the man begins cautiously, afraid to overstep, “Can I- can I join you?”

“Me too Sir” Phoenix is stepping up as well.

Pete smiles at both of them, their bravery and their love for their friends making them willing to risk it all. He admires them both for it but he can’t put anyone else in danger today. “I’m sorry” he watches as both of their smiles turn to frowns, “but you could both lose your wings going out there, especially against orders. Or your lives if this plane doesn’t end up being Rooster and Hangman.”

“I don’t care” Javy argues and besides him Nat nods in agreement, “it’s my brother out there, I have to go-“

“I know what you’re feeling” Maverick explains, his heart breaking to disappoint these two grief-stricken pilots once more, “believe me, but I can’t let you go up there.”

Natasha shakes her head, “but Sir-“

“I promise you” Pete interrupts, making sure they both hear him, “I will not come home without them. I promise you both that.” It’s not exactly what either of the younger Daggers want to hear but it’s the best Maverick can give them. He doesn’t wait for their response or even their acknowledgments, instead rushing back inside the carrier and getting ready. He doesn’t care what obstacles stand in his way, Maverick is getting into the skies and bringing those boys home, even if it’s the last thing he does.

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