oh my favourite desperate housewife? andrew van de kamp
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"Alright, here we go!" The bartender announces, leaning up to place the drinks on the bar.
"That's one whiskey, neat—" He says, sliding the lowball cocktail glass with amber liquid in front of Eddie.
"—And one Whammin' Slammin' Booty-Bangin' Pina Colada."
He places the extravagant cocktail in front of Steve. It's decorated to the nines with a straw, an umbrella, a piece of pineapple, and a little bit of tinsel on a toothpick. A whole party decoration in a drink.
"You guys have a good night." The bartender says warmly, already moving down the bar to tend to other customers.
Eddie stares down at the whiskey in the glass before him and pouts a little. Beside him and watching his boyfriend closely, Steve rolls his eyes.
"Oh, quit being dramatic," Steve says, sliding the cocktail across the bar so it's in front of Eddie, who had ordered it. He steals the glass of whiskey back at the same time.
"It happens every time."
"It happens most times."
"That isn't much better!" Eddie protests, even as he leans down and takes a long sip from the straw while they both get to their feet and leave the bar. Steve's hunting for a table they can snag, his eyes narrowed in focus. Eddie follows him blindly, his cocktail cupped in both hands.
"I'm serious, Steve! What is it about this adorable face—" He says, gesturing to himself, barely letting go of the straw to talk. It doesn't seem to faze him that Steve doesn't even glance back. "—Says I don't want to enjoy a Whammin' Bammin' Big Booty Colada?"
Steve comes to a stop, pausing his search for a moment to look back at Eddie. His expression seems unimpressed on the surface but Eddie can see his lips twitching up at the corners.
"We've had this conversation too many times, babe." He sighs halfheartedly and takes a quick sip of his own whiskey, eyes casting back out across the bar. "You have scary dog energy, you know this. You specifically dress like this on purpose."
Eddie picks up the pineapple wedged on the edge of his glass and bites into it, sending it down with another sip of his cocktail as Steve leads them further into the back of the bar. He finally spots a spare empty table.
"C'mon, I think I found one." Steve urges, one hand snaking back to make sure Eddie's following.
"Is it a crime to wish to not fall victim to stereotypes?" Eddie prattles on, following Steve duly by slipping his hand into Steve's outstretched one. His cocktail wobbles precariously as he takes another gulp.
"Like when that waitress gave me your awful black coffee! And you got my delicious delicacy that I paid extra hard-earned money for..."
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i like to think that when steve and eddie go out, people always lean into their assumptions and are like hmm ok preppy boy with the polo? oh he gets the fruity cocktail! and eddie is always like >:( i don't want this expensive puddle of piss gimme the bonanza supreme cocktail pls. like excuse me i paid for that.
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shoutout to lan wangji and luo binghe for being endlessly tormented by their love interests' mixed signals, reaching their breaking point, and then proceeding to never be normal about their (always reciprocated) crushes (turned husbands) ever again.
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"elf sad" Clip Analysis!!!
(I don't know what else to call it, that is literally the caption for the video T_T)
TDP finally posted the clip from s6e1 where Aaravos sobs into the water, so let's analyze it!!
The first thing I want to point out is the reflection symbolism and ripples symbolism. In Ripples (the short story), we get the following line:
In other words, ripples ruin the reflection of the stars. (Tangentially related, but we have also seen many occasions of Aaravos himself ruining reflections, which I've written about here). However, in this scene, we first have view of the water, and the tears hitting the water. Aaravos then appears on the screen, first as a reflection that is blurred by the ripples created by his tears. The camera only pans up to the reflection's caster later in the scene.
AKA, the ripples are CREATING the reflection of a star.
I also love the way that he looks at his reflection, and then looks away towards the stars when he finds that he's not glowing. It appears to me to be a mix of guilt and anguish. The fact that he can't bear to look at his own reflection and looks to the stars instead is... interesting.
Another thing that I think is worth pointing out in this clip is the Rayllum parallels with Aaravos and the Merciful One. This scene is so similar to the scene in The Midnight Desert when Rayla was self deprecating and looking at the water, and Callum was telling her to shut up.
Rayla and Aaravos are both crying into their reflections, and Callum and The Merciful One are trying to pull them out of it. We don't have much info on what is going on in the new scene, but to me it seems to be around the time of the formation of the Sea of Castout/when Aaravos lost his powers. So, in this case, Rayla and Aaravos are both learning that they are "ghosted" or "cast out"--pretty much, exiled from their community. Callum and The Merciful One are both shocking them out of the tears. (I do think Callum was more effective than The Merciful One's weird cryptic words, though ;)).
I'm so excited for this season! The imagery and visual motifs are already excellent, can't wait to see what else season 6 brings!!
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Pretty 5 is so beloved bc we have:
Arashi "I dream of being a beautiful woman and also had explicit attraction to girls and my male teacher" Narukami.
Tori "I'm in love with my unit leader but he's in an arranged marriage to my sister and I feel selfish for wishing it was me" Himemiya.
Mika "I'm going to live with my beloved partner in Paris as a direct parallel to the life his queer grandfather never got to have" Kagehira.
Hiyori "I'm a princess in the units with the most fanservice imaginable and almost kissed my partner in an mv 3 times" Tomoe.
And Aira "I blush over idol fanservice and am a tsundere towards my unit leader and enamored with my former online friend" Shiratori
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i admit that i find it a little bit frustrating how Wildly Astonished other antizionist jews act when i tell them my israeli jewish family have lived in the region since [some unknown length of time before 1800 when there start being records about it]
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The new color spread... Oda cooked so hard
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Another thing I love love about Bloodhounds is the effortless look of the boxing duo. They're just neck-deep in their little boxing world, training hard, feeling comfortable in their own skin, finding ways to end the bad guys, and looking drop dead gorgeous while they're at it. It's the we're-so-freakishly-handsome-and-completely-unaware impression that gets me every time
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appreciation post for the Beast-Master's robes
I just think they're neat :) might make this one of her canon outfits. I feel like she would wear this when she was living in Rivendell
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i just want you to know that I've started watching The Fantastic Race (I'd never heard of it before) and i too cannot stop imagining Andreil in it.. but also a Foxes/Exy only edition.
like, one is Foxes only, 10 teams, either with some of the freshmen, or while Seth is still alive/in an AU where he survives.
one is Andreil against other Americans where they dominate everything
and one is Andreil, Kevin/jeremy, riko/jean, and some other teams from other American Exy teams
i will eat this thing upppp!! please write it, i beg of you lmao
I do love me some Amazing Race. I think I could give you a Miracle Year of Collegiate Exy version of the Amazing Race.
I think maybe after their initial run through and victory Neil and Andrew are like absolute fan favorites and even though Neil, Andrew, nor the show ever say it there is a general belief that Neil and Andrew got together BECAUSE of the show. Any follow-up publicity on it has Neil and Andrew just staring at the camera like "Are u for fucking real?"
The thing with these shows is that fan favorites get asked to go back ALL the time and Neil gets a lot of very lucrative sponsorships that make the Moriyamas VERY happy after it.
They offer the same deal, a cut on the % that they will take from earnings and this time it's just for competing and this time it's a deal given to. They want the Miracle Generation of the Foxes to come and if every one does then Ichirou will lower Neil, Jean, and Kevin's %s owed to 50% (Maybe the deals are that good, maybe Ichirou is a big fan of the show, maybe he has a finger in it's production. This is mostly just like rationale on why the fuck they'd all do this. Especially Neil and Andrew since like Andrew had a bad time on those planes).
Either way not a single Fox disagrees. Arrangements are made for everyone's kids / pets. Shit is talked.
The Miracle Generation Race is ON.
The Teams are As Follows:
(Fox) Neil Josten & Andrew Minyard (Orange) (Dating)
(Fox) Kevin Day & David Wymack (Green) (Father-Son)
(Fox) Dan Wilds-Boyd & Matt Wilds-Boyd (Yellow) (Married)
(Fox) Allison Reynolds & Renee Johnson (Pink) (BFFs)
(Fox) Aaron Minyard & Katelyn Minyard (Blue) (Engaged)
(Fox) Nicky Klose & Erik Klose (Purple) (Married)
(Trojan) Jean Moreau & Jeremy Knox (Red) (Dating)
(Raven) Johnson & Reacher (Black) (Friends)
(Trojan) Alvarez & Laila (White) (Dating)
(Raven) Thea Muldani & Jenkins (Teal) (Friends)
(Penn) Penn State Coach & Penn State Captain (Grey) (Friends? IDK I ran out of people to be honest and thought well maybe we just have some throwaway team to lose first)
One of the funnier things I could do with that is that this Miracle season is also fan favorite season too and they want the cast to come back but no one can be with their same partner again. So you get shit like Neil and Jean, Jeremy and Andrew, Allison and Kevin, Renee and Aaron, Wymack and Nicky, etc.
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I'm relistening to I am in Eskew at the same time as the Silt Verses come out and it's so fun seeing ideas introduced in Eskew resurface in TSV, like I just finished ep. 24 and the way the History Society works is so much like our new scary war saint!!! Obsessed
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h.otd is really the only fandom where you'll have people calling characters "narcissists" for making choices with their bodily autonomy that don't entirely align with what society demands of them
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Sometimes I feel very sad that I didn’t just focus on one creative skill. I look at my art some days and go I wish I’d spent all my time making only that, because that way it would look better and I’d do more and it wouldn’t matter if I couldn’t write very well because my art would be amazing and I’d be able to make the stuff I really want to and maybe even get a job related to it and I wouldn’t feel like so much time was wasted. And often times it really does feel like you’re wasting time and everything is telling you to just pick something to focus on so it can mean something and you can never seem to pick one of anything.
And then other days I feel like an absolute GOD. Anyone else able to write your own fic and then draw art for it just because you can? Can you make an edit/amv after writing a silly little analysis post on the show/character that is so perfectly on beat and fits the lyrics and with transitions so slapping you get chills while watching? Can you write a short silly ditty on the guitar about how you’re feeling using the eight chords know and belt it out only a little bit off key then do a choppy little animation of your sona singing it?
I may not be the most skilled at all of the above, and it can be a little lonely to be a one man band who doesn’t play half as well as a lot of people out there, but when your power goes out or your wifi dies or you have a day off, everyone else is busy and you’re alone...
you play the best gosh dang music in existence
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bones please spare some isaac facts...tell me about the vibes and lore and everything you want. also what's his fave blood type to drink if he has one perhaps..(i'm taking notes)
HEHEHE THANK YOU SM i have so much to say about this man. but also he hasn't existed for very long in my brain yet so there's still many things missing from his lore currently. but here is a start for you :^)
isaac is a couple centuries old by now and from a (currently unnamed) bloodline that's a bit different from other bloodlines. all vampires have double fangs, their puncture fangs which are the regular ones they use to draw blood with, and their venomous fangs, which only come out when they want to change someone. for isaac's bloodline, the venomous fangs are a lot smaller which makes them less painful to extend and the process is quicker; but at the same time, even the smallest mistake in dosage could kill a victim rather than change them. this is why his bloodline is very small in comparison to others and changing a human into a vampire is always done in a big ritual rather than on impulse, to make sure they get the right dosage. this is how isaac was turned into a vampire :(
his bloodline is also more likely to have their feral sense (uncontrollable mode in which they hunt for blood until they're no longer feral) activated which is why they have to feed regularly and CANNOT miss any meals unlike other bloodlines who can usually miss a meal or two. their feral sense can sneak up on them without a warning and it will cause them to go feral until either their hunger or their "urge" (something vamps get sometimes when they want to change other humans. it's like a vampire ovulation) is sated. this is why many vampires of isaac's bloodline are pretty rich or important people who have other vampires working for them to provide them with enough blood so they'll never go feral by accident
isaac is VERY different from his bloodline though. he grew up in a modest family somewhere in the east of the united states and after he was turned he hid himself away in an old abandoned chapel for many many years, feeding on wildlife and the occasional unfortunate soul who wandered too far into the woods. he ended up hunted down by heavenly, my other oc for this story, who is a vampire hunter but at that point was still very young and on his first ever vampire hunt without his father; heavenly was unable to kill isaac and let him go, after which isaac moved to jericho :]
jericho is a big city on the west coast of the united states and it's essentially a vampire hub, in the sense that the government knows about the existence of vampires but isn't telling the general public but the general public tends to also know about the existence of vampires but it's also not uncommon to come across people who've never heard of them. but at the same time it's also not a huge shock to find out that vampires exist. and in jericho there's many of them and it's like a safe haven for them. am i making sense here
anyway isaac runs a church in jericho now! it's less used as an actual church and more just a homeless shelter and general shelter and community center and food bank AND blood bank all in one, for humans and vampires alike, and he's a very important member of the community he lives in :^) he really wants to help people and improve lives despite the reputation of his bloodline
it's at the same time pretty dangerous for him to be in such a lively place because if he misses a meal even once he could go on a murderous rampage. but it's a risk he's willing to take, knowing he's making a difference and not wanting people to lose their stability in life because he decides to leave or something like that
i don't have much for the story yet but the idea is that heavenly shows up in jericho give or take 2-3 decades after first meeting isaac and they reunite :^) heavenly ends up helping isaac with the blood shortage crisis and also ends up as his personal blood bag because he's a freak and a weirdo who likes getting his blood sucked by vampires. and also he's gay for isaac. and i get him. me too
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