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bisexualnerd · 4 years

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Melancholy Kaleidoscope

Chapter 5/5

~You can read on AO3 here ⤵️⤵️~

Dinner had been peaceful so far. There hadn't been any sign of attempt murder just yet. No flying dishes nor forks being used as weapons.

Bruce was looking at them with suspicion in his eyes.

Well, the man had every right to keep a close watch on them.

Cass stole a piece from his plate again and Tim whined quietly at his sister. The said sister just giggled and booped his nose. He sighed as he could hear Jason sniggering from the other side of the dining table.

"Cass..." He complained again as another piece got stolen. "You have your own food already..."

"Messing with you is fun, little brother." She grinned.

"But..." He got interrupted by a shout.

"You take that back Todd!"

"What?! It's true. That potato piece does look a lot like you."

"I am not a potato you imbecile zombie!" Damian had jumped on his chair with a spoon raised high, pointing at Jason.

The older boy just snickered, leaning back a bit to avoid the Spoon of Doom.

"Damian, don't attack your brother. Jason, stop provoking him." Bruce interfered.

Tim picked out a bean and threw it at them randomly.

"No, go on. This's getting good."

"Tim please..."

Jason had raised a chicken leg to block out Damian's attack and now the Spoon of Doom had flown all the way to Cass's plate, hitting one of her vegetables.

And then one of Damian's elbows knocked at Dick's plate and now there was sauce on the everywhere. Dick looked quite heartbreaking at that.

Tim grinned at Bruce before throwing another bean at Jason and Damian, then took joy in seeing the horrified look on his adoptive father's face.

Damian had now resorted to trying to hit Jason with a knife. Not exactly sharp but still enough to make someone bleed. Jason, on the other hand, had dumped all the food from one plate onto Dick's and used that plate as a shield to protect himself. His other hand held the chicken leg from earlier so he could occasionally bit into it.

You know, you couldn't just waste Alfred's cooking.

He heard Cass laughing from next to him and found himself grinning even wider. His sister then threw small pieces of vegetable at their brothers and encouraged them even further.

"Cass, sweetheart..."

"Fun, Dad." She pouted.

"Please don't encourage them..."

"Fun." She emphasized.

Bruce looked like he was asking for strength from above now. From the other side, Jason jumped out of his seat to avoid getting stabbed and Dick had lunged forward to wrestle the knife out of Damian's hand. Apparently, knives were off limit. Forks weren't.

Damian grabbed a fork from the table and with a loud battlecry, he went for Jason.

Tim had managed to pick up a handful of beans to throw at them. Cass was cheering from her seat. And Dick was trying to look unamused but the small upward quirk on his lips told a different story.

Jason ducked under the fork and they chased each other around the table with the older laughing and the younger shouting. Bruce had tried to grab either of them several times and failed.

Jason was now using Cass to hide from Damian. The younger boy stopped before them, glaring hard.

"Step aside Cassandra, so I can put this zombie back to his place."

Cass's eyes widened at how Damian had called her and smiled at him. She glanced back at Jason with a mischievous glint in her eyes before speaking.

"No killing."

"Sis, you traitor!" Jason gasped dramatically while the younger boy huffed.

"Fine. I will not slay him, but there is no guarantee I will spare him from my wrath."

Cass nodded and stepped aside, leaving Jason without any protection. Damian jumped, the fork high in the air...

...just to be caught by Bruce, who had leaped from behind him. Tim startled, crashed into the table and sent one of the plates flying to Dick.

"Alright time out! Time out!" Bruce took the fork away and dragged Damian away from Jason.

Tim looked down at the sauce stain on his shirt and grimaced. Alfred would not be please. Speaking of...

"Where's Alfred?"

Silence fell upon them and Tim stepped away from the mess on the table.

"Right...I'm just gonna..." Dick dashed down the hallway, probably went looking for Alfred.

He came back with the old butler in tow, who took a quick look at the mess before shaking his head disapprovingly.

"I went out to check on the garden for five minutes, and come back to this. Anyone care to explain?"

"It was Jason and Damian." Tim quickly provided.

"Yes. Jay and Dami." Cass confirmed.

Alfred's "I'm-not-mad-just-disappointed" gaze fell upon the two said boys, one of them grinned sheepishly and the other glared at the ground.

Please, take a wild guess which was which.

"You know that's not completely true." It was now Bruce's turn to smile evilly at them.

"Of course it was Jason and Damian to create this whole mess. But...you both have encouraged them to continue to do so." The man turned to his oldest. "Thanks for being the only child I'm proud of."

"Dad!" Cass frowned.

"B, come on!" He groaned.

"So it's settled. Master Jason and Master Damian will clean the dining room up while Master Tim and Miss Cass will be in the kitchen to help me."

"Sorry guys." Dick waved his hands around. "But I can help too. Providing emotional support and encouragement is very important too."

"Big brother!" Cass poked Dick on his side.

"Really?!" Jason narrowed his eyes.

"Thank you Master Dick. Now off you go. All of you."

They ended up cleaning for a good hour. By the time they had finished, he was exhausted. As the four of them dragging themselves upstairs, he could see Dick chuckling to himself from a few feet behind.

The dick.

They all eventually bunched up in Cass's room because this was usually considered neutral ground. Dick had gone to find several more blankets and pillows so they could make themself comfortable.

When Tim finally cuddled up between Jason and Cass, he remembered.

"Hey Jay, what about the prank?" He whispered.

"Hmm..."

"Jay...it's your idea."

"Right...sorry. So tired. Can we do it tomorrow night or some other time?" Jason mumbled, half asleep.

This is pathetic.

"Fine."

He snuggled against his brother's side and closed his eyes, letting out a long sigh. Not even ten seconds later, he heard Dick whisper-calling for him. Tim fluttered his eyes open to see Dick petting Cass's hair and hugging Damian close to his chest.

"Timmy, hey...the prank?"

"Jay said tomorrow night. He's tired."

"Okay fine. But we're doing it."

"Never say we're not. Go to sleep Big Bird."

"G'night Baby Bird."

He shut his eyes again and tried to sink into the blanket. Jason mumbled something unintelligible and draped an arm over his torso. From his other side, Cass buried her face into his hair and curled up into herself.

Tim yawned, eyes watered. He so needed sleep. He breathed in the scent of Alfred's detergent on the blankets and their clothes as it lulled him into his dreamland.

Everything was good.

-----------------------------

The next night, Jason had stored all the cheese and leftover meat in his mini freezer. Dick had somehow managed to find an oversized piece of bread and hid it away very carefully. Tim had made sure they got enough vegetables and tomatoes. And he had installed a camera in a dark corner of Bruce's room.

They were so gonna get yelled at.

But it'd be worth it.

Besides, the prank made Jason happy and less broody so he was not gonna deny his brother of this.

The clock struck three in the morning and the operation "Bruce the Sandwich" began.

After many discussions, they had argeed that getting past Damian, Cass and Alfred was the hardest. Making their dad into a sandwich (that sounded like murder, Jason loved it so much) was child play. But not like the movie. Nuh uh.

Almost ten minutes later and they had successfully completed their first task. The three carried the food to Bruce's bedroom and while Dick and Jason waited outside the door, Tim went to the kitchen to get the peanut butter jar. Just a small reminder of the the prank's precedence.

He came back not even three minutes later and they all crept into the man's room.

They started with filling the bed with meat and cheese, making sure nothing touched the man himself but as soon as he moved, all the squishy leftovers would startle the man out of his skin.

Tim got some peanut butter on the veggies and stuck them to Bruce's face and neck. He hoped it'd stick until morning. He then got some more using his thump and swiped it across his dad's forehead while whispering.

"Simba..."

Dick snorted from the foot of the bed and lost his balance, which resulted in him almost fell off the bed. Jason, who was next to him, put his hand over his mouth to stop himself from laughing. Tim could still hear a low chuckle coming from his brother's throat.

"If Bruce is Simba, then you are Rafiki." Jason said.

"Hey," Dick whispered. "The Bat King. Coming to theatres this 30th February."

"There's no 30th February."

"Yea no shit Sherlock. That's why I say it."

Bruce twitched slightly and Tim almost jumped on Jason. But the man soon returned to being still. Tim turned around, face scrunched up as if to tell his brothers to finish their prank.

"The bread."

"Oh right. Fuck! Where do I put it?"

"You're half sitting on it Dickhead. That goes on B's head dumbass."

"I didn't sit on it Little Wing."

"Uh huh. Sure..."

Tim placed the bread on Bruce's forehead. It did look a bit squashed. Oh well...

He booped Bruce's nose lightly with one finger which still had peanut butter on it. The man now sure looked like a lion with his coloured nose.

They discarded the tomato slices around and the final piece ended up on Bruce's nose. They tried to balance it but it always tipped over. So they out it on the bridge of the man's nose, right between his eyes.

Dick left behind a piece of paper saying:

"Here's your breakfast in bed. Bon appétit!"

Then they ran off into the night...

...and to the bathroom to wash their hands 'cause going to bed with dirty hands didn't seem so fun.

They were so doomed by the way.

3:54 in the morning now and they all but passed out on Jason's bed. Tim got sandwiched by his two older brothers. He didn't think he minded sleeping like this.

"Can't wait 'til morning." Dick murmured.

"This is morning ya dipshit." He heard Jason's low grumble and snuggled even further against his brother's chest.

"Can we sleep?"

"Fine. Listen to the little shit and sleep already Dickhead."

"Goodnight." Tim didn't even have the strength to tell Dick that it should have been "good morning".

They woke up to the sound of yelling.

Tim rubbed at his eyes and looked around in confusion for a few seconds before the memories came back to him.

"Holy shit! B's up!" Dick shouted excitedly and dragged him up, hitting Jason by accident, which made his second oldest brother growl at them.

"The prank, Jay. Get your ass up now!"

"Fucking hell Dick! Slow down."

"That's your prank dude! Do you want to see the result or not?!"

"Right, let's go."

They scrambled to their feet and dashed down the hall. Standing by the doorway of his room was Bruce, with veggies still sticking to his face, though one or two pieces had fallen already. The peanut butter on his forehead stayed intact.

Tim fished out his phone to take a bunch of pictures while Jason was still busy laughing at their dad's face. The man still looked confused and scared (which was unusual to others, not to his kids) with pieces of food randomly falling from his body to the floor.

Upon seeing them, Bruce bellowed.

"BOYS!"

"Shit, let's go before he gets food on us." Jason pushed him down the hallway and then they were running away.

"RICHARD JOHN, JASON PETER, TIMOTHY JACKSON, COME BACK HERE! YOU ARE ALL GROUNDED!"

"Dickie and I are adults!" Jason called back.

"Did you just..." Tim spluttered. "But I am not, Jay!"

"Yeah, your problem, kid."

"Oh fuck you. He's gonna ground you anyway."

"Hm sure..."

They hid in Tim's room and the older two barricaded the door and windows with his furniture, singing "Do You Hear The People Sing" while doing so.

"What we're gonna do with the pictures?" He heard Jason asked. Tim grinned.

"Just so you know, Twitter is going to have a field day."

End.

#melancholy kaleidoscope #batfam #batkids #batman #batfamily #tim drake #red robin #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #damian wayne #robin #cassandra cain #black bat #bruce wayne #batman fanfiction #fanfic

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hippychick006 · 5 years

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4.22 - Lucifer Rising

Last one this season. All sing along to Kansas. I love the recaps, They even make the later seasons look good.

Urgh! This episode, and this season, I have such a love/hate relationship with. The individual episodes, with only a couple of exceptions were undeniably outstanding. Even the ‘weaker ones; were sill half decent monster of the week episodes that any later season would be proud of.

My issue - and it’s difficult to explain succinctly - is that I was left at the end of it all, feeling that Kripke went too dark with Sam and Hell’s betrayal, and not far enough with Dean and Heaven’s betrayal. I personally feel that this shafted Sam’s character, which is not helped with the constant narrative from this point on that Sam somehow, entirely on his own, started the apocalypse. I’ll leave this bitterness and cover it in Season 5 though.

I do like that we saw Sam trying so hard all season to be more than the blood inside him, to not accept that he was a monster and to try to do something good with it. I do believe his heart and his intentions were in the right place, but at the end of the day, he couldn’t fight his destiny (or more correctly, he couldn’t fight the joint betrayals of heaven and hell).

I do also like the bookends, that Dean broke the first seal (unknowingly) and Sam broke the last (unknowingly).

Opening scene is a convent in 1972, priest is possessed by YED, he’s found out the convent is the entrance for Lucifer’s cage. Through the closed convent doors, we hear screaming.

Sam’s brooding at what appears to be a farmhouse. Ruby tells him that Dean was wrong in what he said to him.. Sam disagrees and says he was right and doesn’t blame him after what Sam did. Ruby tries to cheer him up by saying they’ll patch things up after. Sam doesn’t believe he has an after. He can feel he’s changed inside for good and Dean’s better off away from him.

Dean’s also brooding back at Bobby’s:

Bobby: I know you're pissed. And I'm not making apologies for what he's done, but he's your--

Dean: Blood? He's my blood, is that what you were gonna say?

Bobby: He's your brother. And he's drowning.

Dean: No, dammit! No. I gotta face the facts. Sam never wanted part of this family. He hated this life growing up. Ran away to Stanford first chance he got. Now it's like deja vu all over again...Well, I am sick and tired of chasing him. Screw him, he can do what he wants.

Bobby: You don't mean that.

Dean: Yes I do, Bobby. Sam's gone. He's gone. I'm not even sure if he's still my brother anymore. If he ever was.

Bobby’s very angry now. “You stupid, stupid son of a bitch! Well, boo hoo, I am so sorry your feelings are hurt, princess! Are you under the impression that family's supposed to make you feel good?! Bake you an apple pie, maybe? They're supposed to make you miserable! That's why they're family!”

Dean: I told him, "you walk out that door, don't come back" and he walked out anyway! That was his choice!

No Dean, sorry, that wasn’t a choice, that was an ultimatum. The same ultimatum John gave him and look how that turned out. Oh, Bobby’s on the same page about John, as he calls John a coward. “He'd rather push Sam away than reach out to him. Well, that don't strike me as brave. You are a better man than your daddy ever was. So you do both of us a favor. Don't be him.”

We don’t get Dean’s answer because he’s whisked away to heaven’s version of a green room without being asked permission. Castiel’s there and he tells him it’s almost time.

Lilith’s chef is stealing a baby. Luckily Sam stops her with his powers and says, “We need to talk.”

Dean’s taking in his surroundings. I can’t do this room justice so here:

source: super wiki

I like this grand room with harp and paintings juxtaposed against Dean’s favourite beer and cheeseburgers. Zachariah appears and tells him they want to keep him safe before showtime and offers him food and Ginger from Gilligan’s Island. They’ll even throw in Mary Ann for free. No idea who any of these people are. Dean’s not interested in playing on the holodeck. He asks what the game plan is.

Zachariah: Let us worry about that. We want you... focused, relaxed

Dean: Well, I’m about to be pissed and leaving, so start talking...

Zachariah tells Dean all the seals have fallen, except one. That Lilith has to break the final seal, which will be the following night at midnight but they don’t know where yet. Dean wants more details, but Zachariah says to have faith.

Dean: What, in you? Give me one good reason why I should

Zachariah: Because you swore your obedience. So obey.

Dean looks at Castiel, who looks down guiltily. Still not guiltily enough that he’s never told Dean he outright lied to him or let Sammy out of the panic room.

Sam’s with the demonic nurse. She’s being held down with nothing except Sam’s powers. She says she’s not scared, but Sam says she is, and with good reason.

Demon!Nurse: Look... what's my upside? Okay, I tell you, you kill me. I don't tell you, you still kill me. I get away somehow, Lilith will definitely kill me. So where's my carrot?

Sam: I think what you should be worrying about is what happens before you die. Sam tortures her with his powers.

Back in the green room, Dean’s decided to call Sam after all, but he gets Sam’s answering machine. This is his message: Look, I'll just get right to it. I'm still pissed... and I owe you a serious beat down. But... I shouldn't have said what I said. You know, I'm not Dad. We're brothers. You know, we're family. And, uh... no matter how bad it gets, that doesn't change. Sammy, I'm sorry.

Sam’s still torturing the nurse for information on where Lilith is. The nurse agrees to give it if Sam will just let her die. Sam agrees. She tells him the location and time. He goes to kill her but Ruby stops him. “because we've got to take her with us. It's the final run on the Death Star, and you need more juice than I got.” This demon’s unusually smart though and releases control of the nurse’s body so that we are reminded that Sam won’t just be killing a demon. The real nurse begs for their help. Ruby (annoyed): “Great.” Sam looks horrified.

Flashback to YED in the convent. The nuns are slaughtered. The YED communicates with Lucifer (through the body of a dead nun). YED asks how he can bust Lucifer out. Lucifer tells him Lilith can break the seals and that YED must find him a child. A very special child.

That very special child is doing research on the convent. Ruby tells a bad joke (what’s black and white and red all over). They agree that the convent is likely where it’s going to happen. Ruby wants to pack up “Nurse Betty” and head off. Sam’s reluctant and wants to find another demon. Ruby says it’s just an act.

There’s not a lot you can say about his next scene other than it’s horrific to watch as Nurse Cindy pleads with Sam as he pulls her to the car. “No. Please don’t. Just listen to me, okay? My name is Cindy McClellan. I'm a nurse in the NICU over at Enfield Memorial. I have a husband named Matthew, okay? We've been married six years. He's got to be worried sick about me. And I don't even know who you are, and I'm not gonna tell anybody anything. Please just let me go.”

Sam puts her in the trunk and slams it down, he’s breathing heavily and very troubled (as he should be). They’ve killed humans before as a consequence of using the demon killing knife, but this is different.

Dean’s bored in the green room and topples over an ornament. I like how he looks guilty when Castiel appears saying Dean asked to see him. Dean says he needs something. Castiel says “anything you wish.” Dean wants Castiel to take him to see Sam. (of course he does, because does he call Castiel for any other reason than about Sam?). Apparently, “anything you wish” wasn’t mean to include Sam as Castiel asks why.

Dean: The B.M. I took this morning. What’s it to you? Just make it snappy.

Castiel says he doesn’t think that would be wise. Dean responds he didn’t ask for Castiel’s opinion. Castiel says no to taking Dean to Sam.

Dean: What do you mean no? Are you saying I’m trapped here?

Castiel: You can go wherever you want

Dean: Super. I want to go see Sam

Castiel: Except there

Dean decides to take a walk. Castiel says he’ll go with him. Dean says alone. Castiel again says no.

Dean: You know what? Screw this noise. I’m out of here (he heads for the door)

Castiel: Through what door.

Dean turns back to look at Cass and when he turns back around to go, the door has disappeared and so has Cass. What a complete bitch.

Ruby’s driving. Sam’s looking at his cell phone which tells him “1 new voicemail from Dean.” Cindy is screaming in the trunk. Ruby: What are you - a 12 year old girl? Just play it already. Sam doesn’t play it. They have a conversation about Cindy, who Sam wishes would just shut up.

Ruby: Well, that can be arranged. [Sam glares]... I don’t get it. All the demons you cut with the knife -- what do you think happens to the host? How is this any different?

Sam: Is that supposed to make me feel better?

Ruby: I know that you're having a tough time here, Sam, but we're in the final lap here. Now is not the time to grow a persqueeter.

Sam: Would you drop the friggin' attitude? I'm about to bleed and drink an innocent woman. While she watches.

Ruby: And save the world as a result.

Sam: I don't know. I-I just... I'm starting to think... maybe Dean was right.

Ruby: About what?

Sam: About everything.

Ruby: We're gonna see this through, right, Sam? Sam?

Dean’s attacking the green room walls which just repair themselves. Zachariah appears and tells him off. Dean’s had enough and demands to know what’s going on. Zachariah confesses that Dean’s not going to stop the final seal. Dean realises they want to start the apocalypse deliberately and asks why. Zachariah answers “Why not... when our side wins, and we will, it's paradise on earth. Now, what's not to like about that?”

Dean: What happens to all the people during your little pissing contest?

Zachariah. Well... you can't make an omelet without cracking a few eggs. In this case... truckloads of eggs, but you get the picture. Look... it happens. This isn't the first planetary enema we've delivered.

Dean contemplates killing Zachariah with a statue that is on the mantelpiece, but since Zachariah’s wise to his intentions, he decides not to and asks, “What about Sam? He won't go quietly. He'll stop Lilith.”

Zachariah: Sam... has a part to play. A very important part. He may need a little nudging in the right direction, but I'll make sure he plays it.

Dean: What does that mean? What are you gonna do to him?

Zachariah: Sam, Sam, Sam. Marcia, Marcia, Marcia. Forget about him, would you?

Hello, you’re speaking to Dean Winchester. Do you even know him? I like how Dean’s conversations with everyone not!Sam are about Sam. Sorry, I know this drives EDG’s mad, but that just makes it even funnier. Whether people like it or not, Sam has always been the Luke Skywalker character and Dean is the Han Solo. I loved both Han and Luke, but Luke was the protagonist and Han was the helper. That’s just the tea.

Zachariah tells Dean they weren’t lying about his destiny, he is chosen to stop it, just not Lilith or the apocalypse starting. When Dean asks what that means, Zachariah points to a painting on the wall that depicts Michael, “Lucifer, you’re going to stop Lucifer.”

Dean: Tell me something. Where’s God in all of this?

Zachariah: God? God has left the building

Ummm, nope he hasn’t. He’s just a dick that allowed all this to happen when he could have easily stopped it. But we don’t know that till later, so moving switfly on, we see that the dental hygienist we last saw Lilith in has arrived at the convent. Just in case we haven’t remembered her from 4.18, we get the eyes rolling to white.

Dean’s phoning Sam again. Castiel appears and tells him he can’t reach Sam because Dean’s outside his coverage zone (and I thought Castiel didn’t understand any of these simple references?). They have a conversation about their feelings for each other. No, not really. The topic of their conversation is unsurprising (to anyone not a Heller). Hint: It starts with S and rhymes with ham.

Dean: What are you gonna do to Sam

Castiel: Nothing. He’s gonna do it to himself.

Dean asks what Castiel means, but Castiel looks down again. Yeah, you better feel guilty. BETRAYER! Sadly, Dean’s much more generous than I am. I would have punched him in the face. “Oh right, right. Got to toe the company line. Why are you here, Cas?

Castiel: We've been through much together, you and I. And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry it ended like this.

Dean: "Sorry"?

Dean’s “I am going to unleash a world of whup ass on you” face has appeared. I rejoice as Dean punches Castiel in the face... which sadly only hurts Dean’s hand. Dean’s face here as he flexes his fingers. :) He refrains from trying again, “It's Armageddon, Cas. You need a bigger word than "sorry."

Castiel: Try to understand -- this is long foretold. This is your...

Dean: Destiny? Don't give me that "holy" crap. Destiny, God's plan... It's all a bunch of lies, you poor, stupid son of a bitch! It's just a way for your bosses to keep me and keep you in line! You know what's real? People, families -- that's real. And you're gonna watch them all burn?

Castiel: What is so worth saving? I see nothing but pain here. I see inside you. I see your guilt, your anger, confusion. In paradise, all is forgiven. You'll be at peace. Even with Sam. [So Sam and Dean are together in Paradise. Like we had any doubt! Me likey]

Dean: You can take your peace... and shove it up your lily-white ass. 'Cause I'll take the pain and the guilt. I'll even take Sam as is. It's a lot better than being some Stepford bitch in paradise. This is simple, Cas! No more crap about being a good soldier. There is a right and there is a wrong here, and you know it. [Castiel turns away but Dean grabs him to turn him back] Look at me! You know it! You were gonna help me once, weren't you? You were gonna warn me about all this, before they dragged you back to Bible camp. Help me - now. Please.

Castiel: What would you have me do?

Dean: Get me to Sam. We can stop this before it's too late.

Castiel: I do that, we will all be hunted. We'll all be killed.

Dean: If there is anything worth dying for... this is it.

Castiel shakes his head and looks down again. Dean’s pissed and turns his back on Cass and walks away, “you spineless... soulless son of a bitch. What do you care about dying? You're already dead. We're done.” Castiel tries to speak. Dean (still facing away), “We’re done! He turns to look behind him, but Castiel has disappeared.

Sam’s at a mile marker on the road which shows they are 2 miles from the convent. Ruby’s pressing Sam to move forward. Sam’s clearly having second thoughts and needs a minute. He finally dials his voicemail. “ Listen to me, you bloodsucking freak. Dad always said I'd either have to save you or kill you. Well, I'm giving you fair warning. I'm done trying to save you. You're a monster, Sam -- a vampire. You're not you anymore. And there's no going back. “

Sam’s face during all of this :( and I hate that this has never been addressed. Sure bring Walt and Roy back that no one cares about, but don’t address this. Stows the increasing bitterness and moves on. We see Ruby smirk (which I missed on first watch), but when Sam faces her, she’s serious. He tells her to “do it” which means they are going ahead with the plan. Nurse Cindy screams as Ruby gets her from the trunk.

Dean’s finally decided the cheeseburgers are too tempting and takes one. Before he can eat it, Castiel appears, grabs him and shoves him against the wall. He covers Dean’s mouth with his hand (I’m sure destihellers rave about this scene and how much confirmation of Destiel it is). I don’t have that “interpretation”. I think Castiel must tell Dean something silently, because Dean nods as if he’s understood something. Castiel releases him and cuts his own arm with the demon killing knife (which he’s just taken from Dean), using the blood to create the angel banishing sigil. Zachariah appears to stop him and Cass quickly finishes the sigil and slams his hand down on it. I’m not sure why Castiel doesn’t disappear alongside Zachariah - I’m going to go with the theory that the one doing the sigil doesn’t disappear, which makes sense. I’m sure later seasons are going to come along and contradict this.

He tells Dean they need to move quickly as Zachariah won’t be gone long. He doesn’t know where Sam is, but he knows who does and that they have to stop him from killing Lilith.

Dean: But Lilith’s gonna break the final seal.

Castiel: Lilith is the final seal. She dies, the end begins.

Chuck is on the phone trying to get hookers (seriously, he wants 20 of them), as Dean and Castiel appear. It’s clear that Chuck hasn’t foreseen their entrance.

Back to Lilith at the convent. Her guards all suddenly drop dead and Sam appears from around the corner. And that shouldn’t be as sexy as it is (particularly since he’s just drained Nurse Cindy) to achieve it, but sue me, Powers!Sam is hot and I am shallow. Lilith TK’s the convent doors shut on Sam.

Chuck has given them the final pages to read, which reveals where the final seal is. Chuck says that they aren’t supposed to be there. That they aren’t in this story.

Castiel: Yeah, well, (he glances at Dean), we’re making it up as we go.

GTFO Castiel with the buddy bonding lines. Too little, too late. Bright white light and shaking, indicates arch angels are coming. Castiel says he’ll hold them off, Dean needs to stop Sam. He teleports Dean to the convent. Chuck puts his hand on Castiel’s shoulder. Castiel looks at it and Chuck removes it. Still got to love the little pieces of humour, even in an episode as dark as this.

Back at the convent, Sam TK’s the doors open, then TK’s Lilith against the alter. He uses his powers to hold her there. Again, shouldn’t be sexy but it is. Dean arrives and the lying skank formerly known as Ruby sees him and smirks. He gives her his “I will end you” glare. She TK’s the doors shut on him.

Sam doesn’t see this. He’s focused on Lilith and all we hear is a heart beat that’s getting faster. As Sam is killing Lilith, he stops as he hears Dean screaming for him and banging on the doors. We still hear the heartbeat but it’s reduced. Ruby screams at him to finish it.

Sam ignores her, and goes to his brother. Huge reunion, “Let’s not ever trust anyone over each other again, little brother, kay?” There’s hair stroking, an epic brother hug, full on crying from Sam, a single man tear from Dean and the episode ends, apocalypse averted and we all cry.

No, not really. That’s just the fix it coda’s that were written after this episode, but it’s how it should have ended, dammit!

I feel I should remind everyone, even though it’s only a few paragraphs up, that Sam thinks Dean is there to kill him, not to save him. He hears laughter along with everything else that’s going on. Lilith has decided to chime in - and for someone trying to avoid death a few weeks ago, she sucks at it now. She taunts Sam, “You turned yourself into a freak. A monster. And now you’re not gonna bite? I’m sorry, but that is honestly adorable.”

Sam is like Marty McFly is when someone calls him chicken. He does not make good decisions. We hear the heart rate increase. Sam’s eyes turn black. Lilith is dead. Sam’s heart-beat slows.

So much in this next scene! Sam watches confused as Lilith’s blood is moving in a way that blood flow shouldn’t.

Ruby: You did it. I mean, it was a little touch-and-go there for a while, but... you did it.

Sam: What? What -- what did I do?

Ruby: You opened the door. And now he's free at last. He's free at last!

Sam (freaking out): No, no, no. No, he -- Lilith -- I stopped her. I killed her!

Ruby: And it is written that the first demon shall be the last seal. And you bust her open.... [Sam’s still freaking out]... Now guess who's coming to dinner.

Sam: Oh, my god.

Ruby: Guess again.

I love these one liners. Dean’s still trying to get inside while Ruby continues to blow her own trumpet. “You don't even know how hard this was! All the demons out for my head. No one knew. I was the best of those sons of bitches! The most loyal! Not even Alastair knew! Only Lilith! Yeah, I'm sure you're a little angry right now, but, I mean, come on, Sam! Even you have to admit -- I'm -- I'm awesome!

Sam doesn’t think she’s awesome. “You bitch. You lying bitch!” I mean I use the words “lying skank”, but Sam and I are in complete agreement on what Ruby is. He tries to use his powers on her, but nothing happens and he clutches his head and falls to the ground.

Ruby: Don't hurt yourself, Sammy. It's useless. You shot your payload on the boss.

Sam: The blood... You poisoned me.

Ruby: No. It wasn't the blood. It was you... and your choices. I just gave you the options, and you chose the right path every time. You didn't need the feather to fly, you had it in you the whole time, Dumbo! I know it's hard to see it now... but this is a miracle. So long coming. Everything Azazel did, and Lilith did. Just to get you here. And you were the only one who could do it.

Let’s all ignore the fact that in later seasons, getting Lucifer out of the cage is as simple as a spell, performed by a few hundred year old Scottish witch. I mean, I’m Scottish and we are awesome, but it kind of negates the entirety of season 4 storyline.

Sam: Why? W-why me?

Ruby: Because... because it had to be you, Sammy...

Dean’s finally inside. And his “I will end you bitch” face has magnified a thousand fold. He draws the demon killing knife and advances on Ruby.

Ruby: You're too late.

Dean: I don't care.

Sam stands and grabs her from behind, holding her in place as Dean stabs her.

And how Jared can go from having Sam being the most powerful being on earth a few minutes ago, to being a broken child is complete kudos on him). Sam: “I 'm sorry.”

The blood has finished. Bright light shoots up from the floor. The convent shakes.

Dean: Sammy, let's go.

Dean and Sam grab for each other. Sam’s staring at the light. “Dean... he’s coming.”

Well, damn son. That was heart wrenching. Thankfully, season 5 is a lot lighter. Sam even gets a dog.

#supernatural #season 4 #rewatch #4.22 #lucifer rising #episode review

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shobogan · 7 years

Text

Fic: Equinox

Pairing: Cass/Brenda, Cass & Steph friendship. Guest appearances by Leslie, Bruce and Tim. Word Count: 3157 Warnings: Hospital scenes, though not very detailed. Summary: For @renaroo‘s prompt of Steph meeting Cass’s girlfriend! Clearly this means I needed to make a divergent AU where Steph survives War Games and Infinite Crisis doesn’t happen.

Archive of Our Own

It takes a long time for Stephanie to recover.

In the first week, Cassandra visits quietly, silently, slinking through the windows in the dimming light. But one day, as she sits beside her best friend, Dr. Thompkins flicks on a light.

Cass freezes, flooded with shame and uncertainty; Leslie didn't want her here, before. She wasn't good enough to stop people from dying.

But the doctor's gaze is gentle – even if she studiously avoids the Bat on Cassandra's chest.

“You don't need to sneak around.” She must see the doubt even, beneath the kevlar; she can't read people like Cass does, but years of practice means she's better than most. Her shoulders hunch a little – the same way Bruce's does, when he feels guilty. “None of this is your fault.”

Cass can't hold her gaze, so certain and kind; instead, she looks back down at Steph. She’s covered, mostly, but her face is pale and bruised. “Tried...to find her.”

“You couldn't have known. Even he didn't.” Leslie's voice is lower now, angry – but when Cass looks up again, she sees desperate, mournful love.

“Batman – Bruce – didn't want...this.”

Leslie sighs, raking a hand through limp, mussed hair. (Her clothes are rumpled, and the circles under her eyes are deeper than usual.) “He never does. But here we are.”

Something twists in Cass's chest. There's a heated need to defend him, but when she looks at Steph again - “She just wanted...to be a hero.”

After a moment's hesitation, Leslie steps forward and rests a hand on Cass's shoulder. “She'll recover. You can be here with her as often as you'd like.”

When Batman tells her to go to Bludhaven, she says no.

He tells her that it's not a punishment, not a way to push her away, that she deserves her own city. He doesn't say that he loves her, that he's proud of her, but she can see it anyway. It doesn't matter, not in this moment.

“This – is my city.” She pulls back her cowl. It feels strangely heavy against her neck. “I have...friends. Here.”

His shoulders hunch, a little.

“You can still visit Stephanie. I'll make any arrangements you need.”

She looks away, out at the the city. The jagged skyline that's become her home. The reason her best friend is barely conscious.

“Robin needs you, too.”

She doesn't mean to pout, as she looks back at him. “That's...cheating.”

“Yes,” He smiles, grim and weary. He doesn’t say that he's worried about Tim, or that he wants them away from a city that’s turned against them, a city that he failed.

She takes his hand, and tells him goodbye.

They become Bludhaven's Dynamic Duo.

They don't actually fight side by side very much; when one of them is in Gotham, sitting at Stephanie's bedside, the other is in Bludhaven. Patrolling, or investigating, or just getting to know the city. One of the highlights for Cassandra is Brenda Miller and her tea shop.

She's never been able to relax with people who weren't like her, who didn't spend their nights prowling and fighting and protecting. But Brenda's easy affection and quiet concern always make her feel lighter, and their morning chats grow more and more intimate.

The only problem is, she feels a bit guilty.

The first time they laugh together, it catches in her throat; she takes a sip of tea to hide it, but Brenda sees. (She sees a lot, just like Leslie, even if she doesn't always understand.)

“Cass?”

She wants to say it's nothing, it's fine, but Brenda looks so worried, and she's wondering what she did wrong.

“It's not – you. Promise.” She frowns, trying to grasp the right words. “I was...alone. For a long time. Not much – laughter.” Brenda is nodding, accepting; knows enough about Cain to put some of the pieces together. (She knows what it is, to be on your own, to fight tooth and nail to forge a place for yourself.)

“Then I found Gotham. Found – family. And a friend.”

Brenda's eyes widen, a little. “Your first one?”

“Yeah.” She has to take a moment, filling the space with a few bites of blueberry muffin. “She's – she got hurt. Bad. In the gang war.”

The horror is clear and immediate; the coverage went far and wide, and nothing hid how brutal it all was. “God, Cass, I'm so sorry.” The words aren't hollow; she's never met Stephanie, and she's only known Cassandra for a few weeks, but her heart is bleeding for them.

It makes Cass smile a little, through it all. “She's – awake now, sometimes. But she's...fuzzy. Can't talk much. Can't laugh.”

Understanding dawns, and after a moment's hesitation Brenda reaches out to rest a hand on Cassandra's. “I think she'd want you to laugh.” Her lips quirk in a sheepish, hopeful smile. “I mean, you wouldn't want to be rusty, by the time she's okay.”

Cass blinks hard a few times, before smiling back. “True.”

It's easier, after that, to embrace her emotions – the fluttering in her chest when Brenda grins at her, the warmth in her cheeks when she give her a compliment. It's like flying with Kon through castles of clouds, without ever leaving the ground.

One day, when she enters the shop, Brenda is nervous. It's strange; there's so much steel behind her smile, hard-won pride and confidence that she can wield like a weapon if she has to. Cass has never seen her like this. She barely says a word before handing Cass her tea, and a towering stack of pancakes she'll undercharge for.

Brenda tucks strands of rose-red hair behind her ear, gnawing at her lip. “So – that party, a while ago, it got cut short. And I've got these tickets to a concert – they're a local band, nothing huge, but there's gonna be a mosh pit and food and - “

Cass never thought she could grin quite this widely. It makes her cheeks ache.

“Yes.”

Tim notices, of course. He doesn't see people like she does, but his gaze catches everything, and the wheels in his mind never stop turning. One night when they're actually together, kneeling on a rooftop and missing Gotham's gargoyles, he says “So that's a nice tea shop, huh?”

Cass shoots him a flat look. “Ask...what you want to.”

Tim smiles back, a bit sheepishly. He looks so young, when he does that. “You go there every day, almost. And you're always smiling when you leave. And you've been...you've got a spring in your step.”

She's never blushed quite like this, beneath the mask. She's pretty sure Tim can see it, somehow.

“I just, you know. I want to say...good for you.” He means it, but there's a catch in his voice, in the way his shoulders tense. He's worried about something. “But it's hard. Caring about someone who doesn't know the whole you.”

Cass nods, slowly; Brenda tells her that it doesn't matter what she does, but it still feels like a barrier between them.

Tim smile again, and he looks older this time. “Just – be careful. For both of you.”

They're making progress in Bludhaven – tracking down the corruption, helping people feel safe – but Gotham is just as dangerous for vigilantes. The tension is palpable every time she goes back, whether she's wearing a Bat or not. It's stifling, and frustrating, and it only sharpens her guilt.

But it's always worth it, when she sees Stephanie awake.

She's still so weak, and her face is pale and bruised, she's hooked up to all kinds of machines. But she always smiles when Cassandra slips inside. “Heya, Batghoul.” (It's funny because Cass is dressed in jeans and a hoodie.) “What's shaking?” Her voice is light, if hoarse. She always tries to be cheerful.

She must know that Cass can see everything seething and aching underneath, but she tries anyway.

Cass shrugs as she smiles back, settling into her usual chair. (Leslie has tied cushions on it, and she keeps mugs of tea and an array of snacks in Stephanie's room.) “Crime.”

Steph rolls her eyes, which makes her grimace for a second before saying, “You need more hobbies, girl.” Her eyes go wide when Cass flushes, and a mischievous grin lights her face. “Okay, dish.”

The flush deepens, of course. She doesn't say a word.

“Don't make me cross my arms, it hurts.”

That gets a pout. “Not fair.”

Stephanie's expression is utterly shameless. (For once.) Cass sighs.

“I, um. Met someone.”

“In Bludhaven?” Steph is teasing, but there's real concern and skepticism, and Cass can't help but bristle. Her words are quicker than usual, stumbling against each other.

“It – can be good. . And she's...kind, and gentle, and she makes tea, and - “

The doubts have already faded; Steph's smile is warm and bright. “Okay, that's adorable.” Cass's shoulders ease again, until Steph continues. “So when do I get to meet her?”

She doesn't talk to Brenda about it, not for a week or so. The idea of tying her two lives together like that – her past and her future, her failures and her hopes – makes her stomach twist. The idea of exposing Brenda to all of it, without even knowing who they really are, is worse.

Then, one day, they're watching the news. It's about rebuilding Gotham, and prosecuting the surviving gang members, and the tension between vigilantes and the police.

Cass's shoulders hunch as they talk about blame, about arrogance and recklessness.

Brenda's arm cross as she glares at the screen. “That's not fair.”

“No?”

Brenda shakes her head, firm and sure. “No. I mean – yeah, they probably should have worked with the cops more. But they saved a lot of lives anyway. They shouldn't be fugitives just because they aren't perfect.”

She gestures out the window, as the sun sets. “Batgirl and Robin are out here busting their asses to help us now, just because they can. I've never felt this safe, and I know a ton of people who feel the same way.”

Cass just stares up at her for a few seconds. There's a swooping in her chest, and tears prick at the edge of her eyes. Brenda is about to ask what's wrong, and then -

“Do you...want to come to Gotham? With me?”

Her apartment looks exactly as she left it – Alfred's effort, no doubt – and the lonely, hollow regret she expected doesn't happen. Maybe it's because Brenda is right behind her when they step inside, and she gazes at the room with delighted curiosity.

“This place is amazing, Cass, how can you afford - “ She grimaces, as she stops herself. “Sorry.”

Cass shakes her head. “No, it's – fine. It's, um, a Wayne building.”

Brenda stills, peering at her. “You mean like the Wayne grant my shop got?”

“Um.” Brenda crosses her arms, which is quite a feat considering she's carrying two bags of luggage, and stares at her expectantly. “He's...like a dad.”

“But not your criminal dad.”

“No.”

“So it's like a fostering thing?”

“...Yes?”

Brenda stares at her a second longer, before shaking her head. “Okay.” She's confused, and a little concerned, but she's willing to shove it aside. She always is.

“Can we talk about it...over lunch?”

It's a small diner, run by a local family; it's one of the few places that survived the quake, more by chance than anything. In the early days, before the supplies ran out, they would serve food to anyone who came by. Some people tried to take it, of course, take everything; it was the first time she stood and fought to protect something in Gotham. Before Oracle, before Batgirl.

The hostess – Hannah, a plump woman with a mass of dark curls, a slightly crooked nose and a wide, kind smile – strides forward and clasps her hands. “Cassandra! We haven't seen you in ages.”

Cass smiles back, a bit bashful. “I've been – in Bludhaven. But - “ She gestures at Brenda, who's been watching with keen interest. “Wanted to show my friend...my favourite spot.”

Hannah turns her grin on Brenda, though she's very clearly looking her up and down. Cass can feel her cheeks flushing as Hannah finally nods, turning around and grabbing a menu. (Just the one; she's always let Cass describe what she wants.)

“Come along, dears, I've got a lovely spot near the window.”

Once they've settled in and ordered some milk shakes, Brenda

“She sure likes you.”

“I, um, helped out, once. When the earthquake hit.”

Brenda's eyes go wide, just like they did when she learned about Steph; the Cataclysm took far more lives than the gang war did. “You were here for that?”

“Yeah. Just got here, when it happened.”

“Damn. Talk about bad timing.”

Cass shakes her head. “People...needed help. And I was here.”

Brenda is staring at her with a stunned admiration that makes her want to cry. Time to change the subject. “That's, um, how I met Bruce.”

“Bruce Wayne.” Her brow furrows. “I remember – he tried to stop that whole No Man's Land thing, right? But it didn't work.”

Cass nods. “Didn't – stop helping people, though. None of them did.”

“Them?”

“His – family. Friends. I...”

She's never mentioned Barbara. (Stephanie told her that Black Canary stops in sometimes. To see how she's doing, but also to ask about Cass. Sometimes she thinks about passing a message along, some kind of peace offering.) “I had – she met me, first. Named me. But...”

Brenda's brow crinkles, and Cass can see the recognition of familiar pain. “You fought?” When she gets a nod in return, “My dad and I...we argued a lot. I acted out after Mom died, and he was just...kind of hollow, you know? Depressed. We ran up a lot of debt between us, so that was nice and stressful.”

There's old pain in the way her hands clutch the table, but steady sureness in the set of her shoulders. “But we worked it out, before he died. There's a lot more I wish we could have said, could have done, but...” She shrugs. “I can think back and say he knew that I loved him, you know? Him and that damn coffee shop.”

Cass blinks hard a few times, as she smiles. “I – like that shop, too.”

Brenda grins back at her, ruefully proud. “Yeah, I noticed.”

They're in Gotham for a few days before visiting Steph. They talk about Bruce and Barbara and Alfred, about tea and dancing, about campy horror movies and frustrating politics. Never about what Cass really does, who she really is.

Brenda sleeps in the spare bedroom, and Cass pauses by the open door each night, wondering if she should invite her into her own. But she's never done that before, and while she can see Brenda's attraction neither of them has attempted a kiss, and what if they try and she does something wrong, what if she loses her first friend since -

“You're gonna gnaw your lip off.” Brenda's voice is warmly teasing as she steps out onto the balcony. (It's the only apartment that has one; Cass wonders if Bruce had it built for her specifically, and how long ago it must have been.) “Are you that nervous about me meeting Stephanie?”

Cass turns from the waning sunlight with a sheepish smile and a faint blush. “No, it's – something else. Not important. You're ready?” Brenda stares at her just long enough to make her skepticism clear before nodding.

It's dark by the time they reach Crime Alley. Brenda notices the shift in Cass's posture, the closing of space between them, but she doesn't say anything.

Leslie is deeply, quietly pleased to see them, and immediately ushers them towards Steph's room. (There aren't usually permanent rooms in the clinic, but Leslie set this one aside and Bruce paid for all the equipment and comfort Steph would need.) “She's been conserving her energy all week, you know.”

Then they're stepping inside. Steph immediately puts down the comic she's reading, grin broad and eyes twinkling; she almost looks like herself.

“Cass is right, you're totally cute.”

“Stephanie!” Her voice squeaks, and she must be beet red. Then she hears Brenda's delighted chuckle.

“I've been waiting ages for her to tell me that.”

Steph carefully shakes her head, tsking to herself. “She's ridiculous. Almost as much as her dad.”

“You know him, too? God, Bruce Wayne.”

Brenda walks closer; Cass notices she doesn't stiffen, that she steps around the cords easily. Maybe her father was in a room like this, before he died. Still, she hesitates by the chairs until Cass follows and sits beside her.

“You get used to it.” The words are wry. Stephanie didn't know his name until she woke up in this bed. But there's no bitterness in the set of her mouth, not any more. Cass wonders how often he's visited.

“But sometimes you remember he could buy your house with pocket change.”

Brenda's smirk is sharply sympathetic. “I bet he could buy my whole building. Heck, my whole neighbourhood.”

Steph shift – carefully – and taps her chin. “He might already own my neighbourhood.”

“At least your billionaires are better than ours.”

“Yeah, Bludhaven drew the short straw, huh? But we do get more supervillains.”

Brenda raises a hand, rocking it back and forth. “We've gotten more since Nightwing showed up. Not that it was <i>his</i> fault.” Her expression turns wistful. “A lot of us wonder where he is, you know? I hope he's okay.”

Cass looks away, hands curling in her lap. Steph glances at the door, and her voice lowers. “Cass, you look like a kicked puppy. If you want to say something you should.”

As she looks up, “Tim?”

Stephanie smiles, warm and weary. “He doesn't keep secrets from me. Not anymore.”

“Um?” They both look to Brenda, who looked bewildered. “Did I say something wrong?”

Cass and Steph shake heads in tandem. Then Cass turns in her chair, reaching a tentative hand towards Brenda; after a moment, she takes it. “Cass...?”

“I – Nightwing is...okay. Just – needed time. I know, because...” Wither her free hand, she fishes in her pocket, and draws out a batarang.

Brenda stares at it for a moment, flooded with confusion and shock and relief. Then she looks up at Cass like she's seeing her for the first time. Seeing all of her, finally. “That explains a lot.”

Cass doesn't think; she just pulls Brenda close and kisses her. She barely hears Steph cheering from the bed.

When they part, noses brushing, Brenda murmurs something that makes her heart soar and plummet all at once, something she agrees to before Brenda's even finished.

“I think you should introduce me to Barbara next.”

#cassandra cain #brenda miller #brenda x cass #stephanie brown #femslash february #in march #my fanfic #she was kind

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