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#early season destiel truly hits different
kalopsiadaemon · 1 year
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This is how that scene in 4.22 went right?
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even as someone who does not ship the brothers (or deancas), i feel that there is no denying the heavy handed undertones of romance between them, and the writers' very intentional and frequent exploration into incestual themes, if one is truly understanding the show. however, it's also my understanding that a lot of hellers/deancas people/whomever use a frustrating argument that "sam doesn't really know dean" when in reality, he will always know dean better than cas. thats the whole point of the show. when dean and sam 'betray' each other from the other's persepctive, the person doing the betraying genuinely believes they are acting in the other's best interest, whereas with dean and cas it's always for personal benefit.
to stop the rambling, i wanted to ask, purely in interest of seeing multiple sides: if so many hellers were not so anti-sam and did not project so much onto castiel, do you think the fandom at large (outside of that group) would have less of an issue with the ship? again, i am genuinely curious and you seem both well established in the fandom and well versed in the show itself. i feel as though where other shows do have beef between shippers and such, the supernatural fandom is watching two completely different shows and so many of them are bypassing crucial parts.
Hey Anon!
I don’t ship Wincest either (though most Wincesties I know are cool), and I REALLY don’t ship Destiel. But, I do joke about brother husbands a lot and love the brothers’ codependency. Still, I don’t think the writers are actually ever suggesting there are true romantic feelings to Sam and Dean’s relationship. Or maybe I should say, I don’t think canon (or subtext) Sam and Dean are actually (even secretly) hot for their brother. However, I think the romantic parallels and even outright nods to incest are very deliberate (and obvious). Partly, it’s on brand for the horror/gothic genre of the early seasons, but it also serves the purpose of highlighting how important Sam and Dean are to each other. They are each other’s soulmate, life-partner, and number one, which are usually roles reserved for couples. Also, I think the show just likes to make jokes as well. It’s clearly deliberate when the show goes from having characters assume they are couples, to villains making incesty remarks about them, to Dean asking if Sam wants a divorce.
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I agree that Sam knows Dean better than Castiel, or anyone else. And Dean knows Sam best. That being said, they don’t understand each other perfectly, and they speak “different languages” in terms of showing care a lot of the time. Sometimes this is works in a complimentary way that has them in sync (Dean loves his family, especially Sam most, and Sam needs to be Dean’s number one), and sometimes it causes friction between the brothers (Dean letting Gadreel inside Sam or Sam trying to cure MOC). But, I agree that MOST of the time when they “betray” each other it’s when they are trying to help each other, or at least it’s a byproduct of something they feel they need to do. They never treat each other as expendable. And I also agree that betrayals between Dean and Castiel just hit different. I think this is because 1) they don’t have the same obsessive love underlying everything they do to/for each other (despite what hellers think), 2) they are more brothers-in-arms than true adopted famoly until later seasons 3) Castiel is not human, and I believe that Dean (however subconsciously) treats him differently because of that, and Cass not being human also changes his view of the fallout his actions will have with the people he cares about, and 4) I agree that they both betray each other out of personal interest in thst they value other things/people more highly than each other quite often (Dean will always value Sam above all, and Castiel often values whatever mission he is on above the brothers or is at least willing to risk them for it to an extent).
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Feel free to ramble in my asks whenever you like. Clearly, I do it too, so no judgement here.
My short answer to your question is … yes. If hellers didn’t hate on Sam in a transparent attempt to make him seem less important both to Dean and to the show in general, I doubt Sam girls would care that people shipped Castiel and Dean. It’s the attempt at twisting canon and down-playing Sam that is frustrating. And yes, the projecting added significance onto Castiel is massively annoying because it shows a lack of understanding of the show, whether purposeful or due to ignorance. And that annoys everyone who cares about the “fscts” of the show. It’s also their insistence that Dean is bi … because reasons (often offensive, stupid and/or steryotical) that annoys the people who actually enjoy Dean’s true chracter, not the fan-fic woobifued version of him that hellers (and some AAs) fawn over. But, I think what pisses the fandom at large off the most about hellers is their insistence that they get their way and the tantrums they throw about being “robbed” when a ship that was clearly never going to sail in the show continued not to happen. More specifically, their need to hate on actual actors, writers, producers, networks and other so called “homophobic” fans who don’t agree with them is abhorrent to many.
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I agree with your final sentiment completely. It is like Supernatural is at least two totally different shows, depending on which type of fan you are talking to. I mean, there are arguably more than two versions of the show in collective fans’ minds, if we consider which of the brothers a group sympathizes with most and how they interpret the chracters’ actions (Sam is a whiny brat … Dean is an abusive monster 🙄). But, out of all the fan groups, there is only one who seems to be "watching" a piece of media that does not even resemble the actual show … and it’s hellers.
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And to be clear, I’m not talking about Destiel shippers in general here, but hellers in particular. No one I know, including me, cares if people ship Dean and Castiel for their own enjoyment, but it’s the insistence they are right and attempted rewriting of canon (and threatening real people) that makes people ragey.
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Anyway, thank you for your ask. I’m sorry my reply was so long. (This is likely one of the reasons I don’t get a ton of asks, lol).
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spookyseraphs · 3 years
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It’s the way Dean starts calling him Cas while they’re still frenemies!!! Nicknames are not for people you don’t like!!!!
#spn#deancasnatural#Uriel is the funniest angel in the garrison ask anyone!!!#emotions!!! this angel just met Dean!!! and heaven is questioning his motives bc he’s gotten too close to the humans in his charge!!! Dean!!#he drags Dean out of hell and all of a sudden this ANGEL OF THE LORD is showing emotions!!! wonder what emotions those are!!!!#for the first time I feel!!!!#the righteous man#god early seasons destiel hits so different!!!!#deans voice breaking saying he’s not strong enough Dean is crying!!! to this angel of the lord!!!#I’m not the man either of our dads wanted me to be!!!#absolute insanity!!!!#the new New Testament lmaoooooo#the Winchester gospel#truly later seasons did not do it the same#soldier of god Cas is so HOT#just so you understand why I can’t help#castiel is perfect in every way#JIMMY VOICE#I SERVE HEAVEN I DONT SERVE MAN AND I CERTAINLY DONT SERVE YOU 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻#I’ve been screaming myself hoarse for two and a half hours#Dean screaming prayers to Cas for two and a half hours!!!#we’ve been through much together you and I#you know what’s real??? people families... no they didn’t...#not Dean rejecting the peace of heaven for what’s real :///#AND NOT CAS EATING THAT PUNCH AND THEN MINUTES LATER LETTING DEAN PUSH HIM AROUND#if there’s anything worth dying for this is it...#ugh Cas throwing Dean against a wall#WERE MAKING IT UP AS WE GO!!! there’s no way the rest of this show is this iconic#there’s no way#enough foreplay 😭😭 Bobby chill
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lulu-zodiac · 2 years
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I posted 4,078 times in 2021
544 posts created (13%)
3534 posts reblogged (87%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 6.5 posts.
I added 4,583 tags in 2021
#destiel - 944 posts
#cockles - 824 posts
#misha collins - 569 posts
#q - 386 posts
#jensen ackles - 372 posts
#spn - 348 posts
#castiel - 341 posts
#supernatural - 283 posts
#my stuff - 260 posts
#asks - 256 posts
Longest Tag: 137 characters
#did i really just create a new ship tag on ao3 just because i couldn't get the idea of early seasons dean and pre-podcast jeremy meeting?
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
things misha collins, agent of chaos, has as really done:
- repeatedly used justin bieber as a means of flirting with his co star
- renewed his wedding vows dressed in drag, holding a bouquet of organic vegetables
- paid jared padalecki over a thousand dollars in coins after losing a bet
- found out about destiel by reading fanfic
- got arrested for a suspected bank robbery (he was actually just using the light on the roof of a bank to read his book. y’know. as you do)
- “what are they going to do, fire me?”
- tricked larry king into thinking the spn cast have regular orgies on set
- “accidentally” tweeted a link to an in-depth, cockles analysis tumblr post
- produced farts that caused a fellow plane passenger to pass out twice and require medical assistance
- asked amazon if they ship destiel or wincest
5822 notes • Posted 2021-03-13 18:16:44 GMT
#4
for anyone who needs a serotonin boost; jensen and misha making each other laugh
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See the full post
6114 notes • Posted 2021-01-03 01:06:05 GMT
#3
12 months. 365 days. and WHAT a year it’s been. jensen’s deafening silence on the finale, a rogue spanish dub actor doing a better job of writing the script than literally anyone at the cw, misha “it was a homosexual declaration of love” collins, jackles letting slip he recorded the entire confession so he could watch him and misha together again and again whenever he wants, the increasingly messy jivorce, misha posting a photo of himself in jensen’s bed on the last day of pride month, destiel trending worldwide every time misha or jensen so much as breathe on twitter, misha using justin bieber to wish jensen happy birthday (again), jensen’s inexplicable decision to write a show about john fucking winchester, et tu brute, jensen calling misha “babe” live in front of thousands of people, misha publishing poems suggesting jensen has kissed him, confirmation that questions about destiel are being censored at cons, misha posting a celebratory tweet for destiel hitting 100k fanfics on ao3 in which he confirms he likes to top. i mean. just. what a fucking year.
6235 notes • Posted 2021-11-05 00:15:12 GMT
#2
an addition to this post, as there is clearly so much more to unpack:
- in light of recent events, every j2 interaction from over the last year suddenly starts to hit different (e.g. the disastrous creation con panel)
- PR advisors inevitably descend, and j2 craft poorly written apologies that only highlight the growing rift between them
- an excess of bumpy road analogies appear on twitter
- the already strained mental health of the spn fandom starts to crack, with many people leaving for good
- jensen’s aunt goes rogue on twitter
- 24 hours on and spn tumblr is trying to reconcile genuine sympathy for jensen with the delirious highs evoked by the truly unprecedented levels of drama
- kripke tweets something that's probably meant to placate everyone but instead just further emphasises the rift between jensen and jared
- kripke hastily deletes his tweets and probably regrets every creating the cw show supernatural
- jared, without any sense of irony, implores people not to send hate on twitter. this receives an (understandably) mixed reception
- spn maintains its political reputation, as trump's former legal advisor comes out in support of jared
- somewhere in the us, a publishing intern is suddenly bombarded with lies about the author of an upcoming poetry collection, as, in an impressively horrible move, jared stans decide the way to solve everything is to send abuse about misha collins to his publisher
- non spn blogs start to become genuinely concerned by the fact half of tumblr is still a blazing furnace of destruction
- j2 stans continue to dig themselves even deeper into denial, claiming the entire twitter feud was simply a PR stunt
- misha collins makes a brief appearance as the voice of reason, and then sensibly sees himself out again
- some fans start to come round to the idea of the prequel, possibly because they've had time to consider, or possibly because, in comparison to the last 48 hours, nothing seems that bad
- just as things are starting to calm down a little, jensen uses the word "canon" in a tweet and the fandom implodes again (this time at the implication of destiel)
- jared notably still does not apologise for using shakespeare's words in vain against robbie thompson
- jensen causes yet another (admittedly, smaller) fandom meltdown by changing his twitter header
- "that's it... no more twitter today"
- despite the poorly crafted and unconvincing apologies, mainstream media won't shut up about the j2 fallout any more than tumblr will
- the schism between jared stans and hellers inevitably deepens
- somewhere in canada, jensen ackles probably has a breakdown
- misha collins does, as expected, post a nude video of himself to take the heat off jensen (*insert cockles joke here*)
- 72 hours on and peace finally seems on the horizon as, on the tumblr dash, compilations of misha collins in bathtubs start to outnumber twitter screenshots
- it seems like biden is okay (for now), but the real question is: has anyone checked on putin?
7875 notes • Posted 2021-06-27 14:40:27 GMT
#1
there’s just. there’s just so much to unpack here. I mean:
- jensen emphasising this is the FIRST story he wants to tell about the spn verse (read: the destiel spin off is coming)
- chaos machine's new pride icon
- misha joking the prequel needs a trench-coated angel, which, based on historical data, only means one thing: the prequel absolutely has a trench-coated angel in it (our favourite one with the rainbow wings and squinty eyes, to be specific)
- kripke causing multiple social media platforms to explode by liking said tweet
- jared hearing about the prequel for the first time on twitter at the same time as the rest of us
- misha absolutely not hearing about the prequel for the first time on twitter at the same time as the rest of us
- the entirety of tumblr and twitter trying to fathom why jensen decided to make a show about a character the whole spn fandom have spent fifteen years wanting to punch very hard in the face
- hot topics include: will john's shitty actions be ignored or explored? is the prequel really just a cover for a destiel spinoff?? or just an elaborate and expensive method of ensuring cas finally, in some universe, gets to smite john?
- rowena considered for the prequel but not sam
- it becomes clear danneel and jensen knew EXACTLY what they were doing when they named their production company "chaos machine"
- et tu brute, gutted, bummed
- the increasingly likely possibility that the french mistake and the mockumentary were actually prophetic visions (related: someone check on misha)
- bobo berens and kripke add more fuel to the twittersphere fire
- most of the fandom yelling "fight, fight, fight" at the cast of their favourite show six months after it ending
- a complete, collective tumblr meltdown as fires that have been brewing in opposing corners of the fandom for over a decade implode into either vindication or denial
- unprecedented scenes in fandom history as self-confessed ex-j2 stans quietly let themselves into the cockles trash dumpster
- the realisation that jensen has been plotting this for months (important questions: how long has he known? when they were filming the finale?? at the creation con panel? is this what was going on under all that sexy silence???)
- most of tumblr on tenterhooks simply from watching two middle aged men follow and unfollow each other on twitter
- the fact there are still conventions booked and j2 panels that are absolutely going to happen after all of this
- no one knows if biden is okay
12122 notes • Posted 2021-06-25 11:58:02 GMT
Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →
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therealvinelle · 3 years
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Thoughts on destiel?
Oh boy.
I have thoughts on this, a multi-part fuck-off sized meta level thoughts on this, but as it happens my past self has done me a huge favor on this one.
Devoted followers of this blog will remember the Muffin and I made our own TV tropes. This is not a tropes dictionary we'll ever publish in full, so don't ask, but every so often an ask hits just right (like when we have to justify "Aro is Charlie Kelly") and there's nothing to it but to publish an entry.
And it so happens that I made a Destiel entry some time ago. Note before you read this, the structure of these tropes is that we include definitions of what the trope is (sometimes there are several meanings, hence the enumeration), as well as an explanation of what the trope even is.
Keep in mind that this was never meant to be published, it was meant for our eyes only. But hey, you asked and this saves me time.
Also, yes I know all of this is fucking weird.
Edit: another important note, I stopped watching in early season 9 and really only consider the first five seasons canon. This is in large parts because the show just failed to do anything at all that I enjoyed after that, and several things the show did, like “oh season 4 wasn’t anything special for Cas, he actually rebels all the time lol. CRACK IN HIS CHASSIS”, made it impossible for me to enjoy the show. It’s just easier to make the cutoff at the Kripke era while things still pretend to mean anything.
Destiel
/dəstɪel/;
1
Noun
A nonexistent ship. A Destiel ship is when the fandom ships Character A with Sexy Lamp B. The Destiel ship is past incompatible, because you could still get relationship angst and in turn a ship out of incompatibility. The Destiel ship is nonexistent because one half of the ship is of a nature that means he cannot meaningfully be in a romantic relationship with anybody, regardless of how much character development he goes through or even how much love there may be between him and character A. Originating from Supernatural, a TV series whose fans came to passionately ship one of the show’s main characters, Dean Winchester, with the angel Castiel. Dean Winchester is a womanizing redneck dudebro with daddy issues. Castiel is a multi-dimensional celestial entity created to fulfill God’s Will. Castiel is not boyfriend material. Not to be confused with Anna/Elsa or Christine/Erik.
Lily/Rabbit is a Destiel ship.
Steven Universe is full of Destiel ships.
2
Destiel, the abbreviation of Dean Winchester/Castiel, is the insanely popular slash ship that rose up in the Supernatural fandom in the show’s fourth season, when the character Castiel was introduced. Originally a Honey Maren ship, the ship has since grown to quite possibly have the most notable fandom on the internet. Notable is really the only word for it, these people invented ABO, ruled supreme on social media for years, and in many ways made Supernatural’s reputation what it is today. Their impact on fanfiction and slash culture is immense. Unfortunately, the ship is the worst. On a very fundamental level, Dean does not understand what Castiel is, and he never truly forgives him for being a supernatural creature. When he tries to bond with him, it’s over human things Castiel has no understanding of, which in turn only serves to highlight how lonely Dean is, that the closest thing he has to a friend is a celestial entity he doesn’t begin to understand. Castiel, on his end, loves Dean, but in the way of angels. He loves all of God’s creations, some more than others but still not in a carnal way. He’s a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent, he feels no hunger, thirst, pain, or pleasure (or if he does then it’s usually a sign something is extremely wrong and he’ll spend the episode whining about it). The one time he does experience temptation, he’s not actually experiencing his own temptation, it’s Jimmy Novak’s consciousness giving him trouble. Angels don’t feel emotions the way humans do, what they have seems to be a different concept altogether. There’s also the fact that Castiel can’t walk the Earth in his true form, so he must possess the form of Jimmy Novak if he wants screentime. Jimmy Novak is not happy about this, he at first didn’t understand what he was saying yes to then was later coerced with the threat of certain death and his daughter’s endless torment if he didn’t let Castiel possess him. If Dean and Castiel are somehow having sex, they’re raping Jimmy Novak. Lastly, the relationship is quite toxic, as Dean is a toxic person, and his relationship with Castiel is no exception. In short, Destiel is a horrifying, impossible ship that hinges on Castiel looking upon his Father’s creation and saying “I want to stick Jimmy Novak’s dick in that.”, Dean raping a vessel after spending his life freeing people like Jimmy, and sexual love between a human and a divine entity being feasible.
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chocolatecakecas · 3 years
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Baby Blues
Silence and Sound: Season 13 Destiel Fic Part 10
Part 1     Part 3     Part 4     Part 5     Part 6     Part 7   Part 8    Part 9
read on ao3
Dean had always associated the bunker with silence. The soft hum of the the ancient heating system, and the dull buzzing of the lights.
It was a far cry from the dingy motels with their paper thin walls and strings of seedy customers.
Or the years he spent practically living in the Impala with her ever rumbling engine, listening to the legos rattling in the vents, or kept awake by Sam's endless snores.
So he could appreciate the silence. He had always found it comforting, at least that's what he told himself.
But now, the bunker is bursting with noise.
Plates and cups clinking in the kitchen, cellphones ringing off the hook, the beeping of the oven timer, and the stream of constant conversation.
The sound of tiny feet pattering on the concrete, plastic wheels squeaking on the wooden floors, the clang of legos on the map table, and the distant sounds of Toy Story playing on the tv in the Dean Cav- living room.
Shrieks of laughter ring through the halls, both young and old. Happiness and love filling every corner.
But it's also filled with sounds of despair.
(read the rest under the cut)
Screaming matches in the kitchen, muffled arguments behind closed doors, desperate pleading in the garage after returning from a hunt gone bad.
Wails of pain from a scraped knee, the clang of legos as they are angrily shoved off the map table and sent scattering across the floor, the distant sound of a temper tantrum in the living room.
Broken shouts and muffled sobs ring through the dark halls during the early hours of the morning. Both young and old. Yet, love still fills every corner, but often it only fuels the sorrow, strengthening the blow.
But today, it's filled with laughter.
Cas, pretending to chase Jack, who's giggling like a maniac, up and down the halls. His little feet slapping against the floors, as Cas yells behind him (in his signature "silly voices" of course)
Sam and Eileen at the map table, laughing as she tells a story about her most recent hunt. She ran into Claire and Kaia due to a huge miscommunication on Sam's end (He's still getting the hang of the whole "Hunter HQ" thing), causing all three of them think they were hunting three different monsters. But it's alright because now the girls are coming for dinner later, (at Cas' invitation and Dean's insistence) since they drove all the way here for a hunt anyway. It wouldn't be a full family dinner, because his Mom and Bobby wouldn't be back from their hunt in Montana for at least another two days, but that just means they'd have to have another unplanned-planned "get together", so he definitely wasn't complaining.
And Dean stands in the kitchen stirring milk, cheese and Star Wars shaped macaroni in a pot, spoon clanking against the metal.
He listens to the sound of his little family, the people he cares about most in the world. He hears as the sounds of their lives fill up the halls, and finds it difficult to remember the silence.
He finds himself struggling to hear the soft hum of the heating system, or the dull buzz of the lights.
And he wonders if he misses it? Wonders if he misses the comfort of the silence? Wonders if it wa-
Something crashes into his legs, ripping Dean from his thoughts.
Jack giggles as he tries to hide himself from view behind Dean's legs. He shushes Dean with a serious look, showing that he means business.
So Dean looks down and throws him an exaggerated wink, zipping his lips for good measure, which sends him into another fit of giggles.
Dean gazes travels back up to see Cas hanging on the doorway, cheeks tinged pink, and a knowing smile on his lips. And Dean's heart definitely doesn't skip a beat.
"Hello Dean, you haven't happened to see our son anywhere, have you?" Cas asks dramatically, making his presence known.
Our son, that always makes Dean's heart soar.
"Hmm Jack? Why no, I can't say that I have! He definitely didn't come through the kitchen" Dean responds playing along.
Jack shuffles behind Dean's leg letting out a little giggle.
"Oh, so then you wouldn't mind moving away from the stove and walking over here to help me look for him?" Cas teases, stretching his arms out for emphasis. Dork.
With a grin, Dean goes to take an exaggerated step towards Cas, but Jack pulls on his leg.
"Daddy! You promised" Jack shouts in disbelief, hanging on Dean's legs.
"Sorry bud, but you were so quiet that I completely forgot you were there" Dean says with mock surprise.
Jack opens his mouth to retort, but Cas hums alerting him of his presence again. His eyes go wide, realizing he gave away his hiding spot, as Cas takes a big step forward.
And at that, Jack races from the room, with a shriek of laughter. Dean and Cas share a laugh watching him go.
God Jack is getting so big, 18 months. He's gonna be two this year, and Dean's heart clenches at the thought. Of course, being half angel he's developmentally "older" than two, but Dean doesn't like to think about that.
He turns towards Cas again, watching him fondly gazing at the now empty doorway.
And almost 10 months with Cas.
Cas' eyes finds their way back to Dean's, as they always do. So Dean stares back.
And it's this moment that Dean realizes just how human Cas has become, even with his grace intact. With his messy hair, his rumpled blue "dad" sweater and jeans, his mismatched socks, the soft smile on his face that crinkles around his eyes. And it hits him how far they've come.
It's been 18 months since that night wh-18 months since Jack came into his life. And a lot can happen in 18 months. You can fall ass backwards into raising a child, slow down a bit on hunting, start dating your best friend who’s been the secretly been in love with for years, who came back to life, and raise the child with him.
Something warm settles in his chest.
Dean refocuses on Cas, and notices a look he's never truly seen on him before. A look that says, "there's no place I'd rather be, than right here". Of course Cas has made it clear that this is what he wants, but he's never worn it so plainly on his face before.
It's contentment.
And it knocks the wind out of Dean's lungs.
It's been almost 10 months since Dean and Cas got their crap together.
And of course, it isn't easy. There's screaming matches, sleepless nights, petty fights, and more baggage between them than you would find in an airport.
But Dean wouldn't trade a second of it. And apparently, neither would Cas.
Because Cas is content. Here. With Dean.
Cas is actually happy here, with the little life they've created. This is where Cas wants to be, and this is where Dean wants Cas to be.
And in this moment Dean is rapidly realizing that it's all terrifyingly real.
And Dean's never felt this way in his life, about anyone or anything and he's, scared, but god it's the good kind of scared. And he-
He catches a slight dip in Cas' smile, which snaps him back to reality. His thoughts must have been clear on his face.
Shit that's not what he wan-
He quickly tries to convey the same look of contentment through his own features, giving Cas a smile. A real one.
And he must somewhat succeed because Cas' smile returns, but a question still lingers in his eyes.
So Cas parts his lips, most likely to ask Dean if something's wrong (Cas never lets him get away with anything), but Jack's laughter rings from the other room. So he huffs a laugh, and begins to cross the kitchen making his way to the other door.
But not before he places his hand on Dean's shoulder, and presses a soft kiss to his cheek.
Dean's heart swells. God that never gets old.
As he pulls back, he meets Dean's eyes again, leveling him with a look that Dean knows all too well. A slight smirk with a raised brow, that definitely doesn't make Dean's stomach flip.
It's his signature, "I know you Dean Winchester, which means we are definitely talking about whatever that look on your face was, later". And of course he always pretends to be annoyed that Cas can read him so well, but god if it doesn't make Dean's heart race a little every single time.
So Dean just gives a shit eating grin in return, and Cas' smile morphs into a smirk.
Then Cas is leaning forward, ready to capture his lips with his own, Dean happily following his lead.
But then, Cas pulls back at the last second.
And before Dean can even open his mouth, Cas gives a tight squeeze to his ass, and then he's bounding away through the door.
He hangs on the door frame for a moment, giving Dean a wink, and then he's gone, laugh ringing down the hall. Friggin tease.
"What a little shit", Dean laughs to himself, rolling his eyes fondly.
As he turns back to the pot on the stove, he hears Cas exaggeratedly wonder where Jack has gone, followed by the sound of Sam and Eileen joining in on the fun.
When he grabs five bowls from the cabinet, he makes sure to listen to the laughter echoing through the halls.
And Dean begins to wonder again.
Maybe he didn't find the silence of the bunker comforting, maybe he nev-
The laughter swells in the other room, feet stomping on the wooden floors. The love of his life, his son, his brother, his new best friend and hopefully one day sister-in-law. His family. Laughing together without a care in the world, on this lazy Sunday afternoon.
And well, Dean can't say he misses the silence much at all. In fact, he's actually quite content with the noise.
I just wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone who read, liked/reblogged, or left lovely comments on this story! I have not written in years, this fic happened by complete accident, and I never could have imagined the love it got! (I do love this little "universe" so maybe look out for some more baby jack in the future)💓 AND a very special thanks to @wormstacheangel and @smiledean who listened to me complain and yell about this fic every week💓💓💓💓
Tag list:
(As always,please let me know if you would like to added or removed!!💛)
@wormstacheangel @smiledean @shelikestv @chaoticdean @midnightwings-deancas @jellydeans @sunshine-jack @archervale @wikiangela @organicpurplepants
@writtendevastation @tkdwolf2012 @doemons-blog @rolling-stoned-girl @skylerkernaghan @shadowywerewolfqueen @the-cookie-navy @thelahatiel @thefantasyfiend @castielle-deanna @aestheticflyer26
@multi-fandom-imagine @x-mypeopleskillsarerusty-x @wellofwoes @becky-srs @multi-fandom-dark-lord @perfectkoaladream @castiel-for-lunch @it--hurts--to--become @bowtiesandneckerchiefs @dakiaty @feraldean @teamfreebees @keshetcas @hrh-princess-bea @martymar1963 @winchester-novak
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and the rewatch continues
So rewatching most of season 5 and dipping into season 6, after coming from season 4, I found some things very interesting, things I actually had forgotten about and some that just hit differently now that the show has ended:
Season 4:
Brothers - different iterations: Had that finale happened after this season, it might have made better sense (though I STILL say the manner of Dean’s death is laughable)
Destiel & Cas: While Cas and Dean have some uncomfortable staring contests and there’s chemistry, I didn’t get the whole Destiel vibe (this is just my personal take), yes there’s a bond there, a growing partnership so to speak but I feel like Cas is not around enough for it to be in the forefront of the story or even to demand Dean’s attention in a way. Like Cas made his big entrance in 4x01 and we saw how things took off from there for the story and for this connection/bond between he and Dean but Dean is early season Dean and Cas is early season Cas. Though I found Cas’ interest in everything Dean Winchester to be intriguing (and he put Dean back together with his own hands, I just...this really does become the greatest love story ever told, I swear), I personally didn’t get the whole UST vibes that has been talked about. I actually found myself wanting to go deeper into Cas’ story (a la 6x20 style) aside from Dean’s and Sam’s. 
Anna: That whole night with Anna was purely that: a night. There wasn’t a whole lot of chemistry between Jensen and Julie and it’s very clear that this whole sex-on-last-night-on-earth thing is for comfort, for both characters. I kind of get why they switched up gears there for Dean’s angel role, even if they didn’t intend for Destiel to read as romantic at all initially. 4x09 & especially 4x10 were so obviously trying to ying and yang the brothers and the sides that had chosen them/complemented them: Anna | Ruby, Heaven | Hell -> eventually Michael | Lucifer. But back to Anna, while I enjoyed her character and would have loved to delve deeper with her, I am glad Cas was the one who got to stay. Anna and Dean had no chemistry, outside of a couple of glances before the big hookup/last night on Earth deal, there wasn’t really anything there. Tbf, they didn’t have a lot of private time before that, except maybe one convo. To me, in this scenario, Anna was a source of comfort (after she tells Dean he needs to forgive himself for what happened in Hell which I very much appreciated, someone had to tell him that) and attraction, letting her have her last night on Earth, a hookup, etc. But there was nothing deeper there. And for this bond with an angel to happen, there needed to be something deeper there. Perhaps had Anna been around longer and didn’t go the way she did in season 5, it might have but I honestly tend to doubt it. We all know Cas and Dean’s (Misha’s and Jensen’s) natural chemistry is off the charts. I’m not sure Anna (Julie) could have competed with that had both Cas and Anna stuck around together. I know I’m completely biased here, but I almost felt like Anna and Cas had more chemistry together, it might have been because they got more face time, I’m not sure. But I thoroughly enjoyed watching it all go down again.
Adam: Omg I forgot about how Adam wasn’t Adam when Dean and Sam first met him. That was heartbreaking on so many levels, but mostly for Adam and his mom dying the way they did and of course, for Dean and Sam. Namely Dean because he was the most affected by finding out about Adam’s existence. And I swear I fell in love with Dean more in that episode as a character because despite his pain, his anger, his hurt, he still tries to do the right thing by Adam, to honor his dad’s wishes. And John...that mf’er doesn’t deserve any of those boys as his sons. What an asshole through and through. 
Season 5:
Destiel & Cas: And now we see Cas becoming a bit more forefront and the vibe has changed...slightly. Now it’s a partnership turning into a friendship. Dean and Cas get a bit more face time and it shows. 5x03 was awesome and of course the wholly unnecessary line of “One, Bert and Ernie are gay” -- like where did that come from? I still loved it. It was tough to see Dean and Sam go their separate ways in the beginning but we still got some gold out of it with 5x03 and 5x04. And thankfully, we get more into not only more of the angel and apocalypse lore this season, but we also get to see how Cas’ relationship with the Winchesters is changing and more of what makes Cas tick as a character in his own right. And of course, bamf!Cas was very present. 
Brothers: Once again, had that finale happened after this season, it might have made more sense (sans the junk death) - because it’s very obvious that the co-dependency is alive and well here and it would have made more sense for their characters - while they have others outside of the two of them they are caring about (Bobby, Ellen, Jo just to name a few), it’s still the exclusive Winchester-only club. I truly enjoyed watching these two working together and moving towards the season finale. Dean’s memory of Sam and the fireworks, Dean talking about how Sam’s best memories weren’t the same as his (shocker, John Winchester is a d-bag, I’ll keep saying it), Dean struggling to make the decision to say yes to Michael, having to agree with the plan for Sam to say yes to Lucifer to try to trap the latter, Dean showing up to the cemetery -- all of it was incredible and the two of them were the beating heart of the show at that point. 5x22 will always be one of my favorite season finales for that show. It was pure awesomeness, truly epic and perfect.
Dean: holy hell, they really, really threw a lot into Dean this season - not that they hadn’t before, but damn. Each season just amps up the Dean game, just like I remember, and I am happily here for it again. No offense to Sam at all, but Dean is just so complex, so complicated yet straightforward, and there’s so many layers to him that they just keep peeling back and they feed us well each season. I swear, if you turned the sound off and just watched that scene where Dean tells Zachariah to call Michael, where Dean and Sam go their separate ways, you would know exactly everything Dean is feeling and thinking thanks to the incredible talent of one Mr. Jensen Ackles. Just really incredible. How this man never got nominated for an Emmy at any point for this show just astounds me. Yes, I know that show wasn’t considered a contender for that type of award run, but dammmnnnn. He deserves it and more. Watching this season and season 4 really brought back the original reasons I fell in love with Dean as a character in the first place. One of the best characters ever, I’m telling you. And may I just say, I hated that they brought back John’s leather jacket for him in the season finale but I get it, it was Kripke’s swan song (did I just do that? I believe I did) so we of course went back to core Winchester things, not just in story but every element. I’m ngl, I was so glad to see Dean shed it though when he is sitting down to dinner with Lisa and Ben.
Apocalypse: I thoroughly enjoyed this whole plot line - this really was high stakes, more than ever before, and though angels were dicks, there was Lucifer of course and a mysterious though mostly absent God behind the curtain - you just never knew what was going to be thrown at you next, just like the boys were going through.
Heaven/Mary: even though this definitely has to do with Dean more so, I did enjoy them seeing Ash and Pam, Ash’s setup, and of course Mary being there, seeing how such a good memory could be manipulated by the dick angels and the horrible things Mary said to Dean. Of course, I felt for Dean but it was interesting to see that whole scene play out. Plus we got even more confirmation of what we’ve known all along: John is a bonafide asshole and Dean really did experience facets of spousification, even before Mary died (which just makes me so sad for him, I swear if they don’t put a Cas vs John scene in the reboot... because you know Cas will win that thumb war)
Meg: ngl, I wasn’t really crazy about this iteration of Meg - I don’t mean Rachel Miner’s version, just this particular performance, which I chalk up to whoever decided they wanted her to go this route in her performance - I couldn’t believe it was the same character, the same actress - I am so glad the show/Rachel developed the character we all love to hate and secretly really love to how she was in later seasons
Jo: omg Jo. I have to admit, in season 2, in the first episode she showed up in, I despised her. She was like that bratty teenage kid who’s a real pain in the ass and whines and doesn’t get it. But after that episode, I grew to love her with each one she was in. She became a bamf in her own right and I loved seeing that come through this season especially. Her death was horrific (what is it with this show killing off bamf female hunters in such a gruesome way? it brought back horrible Eileen flashbacks for me personally, and for them to turn Meg and Ketch into somewhat redeemable characters after that... you know, I swear...) but heroic and I had never been more proud of my girl. Except the scene with Dean in the kitchen. As much as I love my chaotic hunter son, I was glad to see Jo flip him off in the way she did. So proud. And then her goodbye with Dean, I had forgotten exactly what he did so I was going “omg, she just saved you, Dean, this girl has feelings for you, she deserves at least a kiss, kiss her. right. the fuck. now!” and sure enough, he did, on the forehead, which I was like okay, well I get it, he doesn’t return those feelings but he does care about her but dammit, she deserved for him to plant one on her. and then he did and I was just gone, I was a complete bawling mess. And her goodbye scene with Ellen, and then her death along with Ellen’s sacrificing herself to stay by Jo’s side and give the boys a chance to get out of there...yeah, I didn’t stop crying for about five minutes. I cannot tell you how much I miss those characters and I would have sold someone else’s right arm to make their return in the series finale happen. Besides the obvious characters that should have been present, Ellen, Jo, and Ash deserved to be there (just not Samantha and Chad, if we can get a “Cas helped” for the third major character/lead, we can also get a “Ellen and Jo went to assist in setting up the honeymoon suite above the roadhouse - I said what I said).
John: usually, I cannot abide giving any time to this jerk, never mind talking about him, but I have to say I enjoyed seeing pre-loss John in 5x13. That conversation he has with Sam I think is so glaringly important. I know it was for Sam to forgive John and heal, but the fact that John himself is saying “how could he do that to you? he was supposed to protect you” -- yep, that was pure poetic cinema in my eyes. Because pre-loss John is right, how dare post-loss John do that to his boys? There’s no excuse anyone or this show can give him. As much as I love JDM, post-loss John Winchester will never be okay in my book.
Adam: omg Adam. First of all, I loved his dynamic with Sam and Dean. I really, really wish we could have had him around longer just for that alone. What an awesome character we could have had giving Dean and Sam a run for their money. “Well, we’re working on the power of love.” “How’s that going?” “Not so great.” -- give me an episode of the three brothers on a milk run hunt (sans generic mask-wearing vampmimes) with all of the fixings and I swear we would get done!Sam, consistently being roasted between Dean and Adam, and then Dean thinking he’s got a mutual now, a BFF, and Adam turning right around to roast him as well. It would be epic, I tell you, epic. I wish Adam had gotten a better end, this season and at the end of the series. He certainly deserved better. And this may be a random observation but why did Michael take Adam at all? I know the countdown had begun and he was desperate to grab a vessel so he could fight Lucifer at the appointed time and Dean was not giving in (that he knew of), but what chance of victory did he think he had without using his true vessel? Using that logic, I guess Michael’s end in the series makes more sense now...? Who knows.
Chuck: Swan Song (5x22) and the lines, “Endings are hard. Any chapped ass monkey with a keyboard can poop out a beginning but endings are impossible. You try to tie up every loose end but you never can. The fans are always gonna bitch. There’s always gonna be holes. And since it’s the ending, it’s all supposed to add up to something. I’m telling you, they’re a raging pain in the ass“ -- did anyone else feel like that was Kripke speaking or is it just me?
Season 6:
the whole Lisa thing: while it was nice to see Dean go domestic, I have to say I was more invested in Dean and Ben’s relationship development than I was with Dean and Lisa’s. The chemistry just wasn’t there, I have to be honest (he and Anna actually had more chemistry for a few minutes than he did with Lisa this whole season). I don’t doubt they loved each other, it was real, and Lisa was good for him at the time but it just didn’t have that spark. I loved Lisa as a character in her own right, but I was happy to see her and Dean eventually go their separate ways. Though my heart broke for Ben on that one. He and Dean really had a whole father-son bond happening there. I appreciated that when Ben called him, even that one time that nothing was really wrong, Dean dropped everything and headed right over. They had a bond of their own happening outside of Dean and Lisa’s. I think Dean ultimately made the right choice in the end to keep Lisa and Ben safe (though they should have been able to choose if they wanted this), but God did that cost him and we see it in that scene outside of the hospital with Sam. How much that hurt for him, and for us to see how it killed him to do it. I’m still grateful that he got to see what the domestic life was like and that he got a reprieve from hunting for a bit. It made complete sense as to why Cas didn’t want to pull him back in to ask for help with Raphael.
Destiel: Welp, now there’s definitely an emotional relationship happening. Meaning the bond has become even more forefront and not only is Dean affected, but we also see that Cas is, too. Dean’s reaction to finding out Cas was working with Crowley the whole time, Cas’ reaction to Dean choosing to save the two boys instead of focusing on finding Eve, Cas’ reaction to Dean’s stance on the Crowley situation, Dean’s finding out Crowley kidnapped Lisa and Ben, Cas asking Dean to trust him, Dean seeing Cas becoming the new God and needing to summon Death, etc. It was fantastic. While it hurt during some moments, I enjoyed seeing the dynamics and reactions to these situations play out. This is definitely a friendship now, a family relationship formed (and still forming) like Dean says in 6x20. Imho, Jensen and Misha knocked it out of the park this season when it came to that relationship. I loved it.
Cas: holy hell, 6x20 has become one of my all-time favorite episodes of SPN. I loved seeing Cas’ POV. Cas was already a fave character of mine but this episode made me fall in love with him all over again. This was incredible and I’m so thankful they fed us so well with this one. I really enjoyed seeing Cas as a character stepping into the forefront, right there with Dean and Sam. Yes, he was a part of TFW before this, but you have to admit that in this season, it becomes a whole new ball game. Really amazing stuff and of course, Misha slayed it all.
Meg & Megstiel: I was so happy to see the iteration of Meg return that we know from later seasons. Maybe I’m just too used to that version but to me this felt more effortless for the character and for Rachel, that really let both shine. Personally, I’m not a Megstiel shipper. While I love their dynamic, it just isn’t there for me, but I really did enjoy their scenes together. Cas felt as if he needed a little shaking up so to speak so I think she was perfect for that. Plus, I have a hard time forgiving those in the show that sic Hellhounds on my bamf female hunters so that might be partially the reason for my bias, just saying. (I never really forgave Ketch either)
Samuel...& Co: I just...why? Don’t get me wrong, I liked Mitch but this felt a bit...I don’t know...off? Other than some place for Soulless!Sam to go while Dean was playing house and for nabbing Alphas for Crowley, I don’t get what the point of this story line was? Was it to show us that Mary’s dad was a d-bag? Check. Was it to show us how people sometimes make the worst decisions when it comes to their family? Double check. Like, we kind of already got that and it was just unnecessary confirmation if that makes sense. And the thing that kills me is that Samuel was in Hell (or goes to Hell, I kind of did other things in the background during that arc) but he loved his daughter enough to betray her sons and do the wrong thing but John gets to go to Heaven? This still confounds me. Though I enjoyed Gwen and it was a shame she couldn’t be a family contact in another state for the boys later on to pop up every now and then.
Soulless!Sam: I enjoyed this part of Sam’s arc but I won’t lie, I was relieved like everyone else when he finally got his soul back though waited with bated breath for the other shoe to drop. But it was interesting to see this side of Sam.
Dad!Dean: I know I mentioned Dean and Ben above, but that one episode with the shifter!baby, that was priceless and God, did I love it.
I just loved going back to this for both boys
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curioussubjects · 4 years
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come be a season 12 truther, baby, with me
In honor of tonight’s Berens/Glynn episode (!!!!), I’d like to take y’all on a magical journey in which I share why I think Dean and Cas got together in season 12. 
Keep in mind that this post takes for granted that Dean and Cas are in love with each other and that their relationship has been increasingly coded as romantic with each passing season. Consequently, what this post does is point out some key moments in their relationship and argue why they don't get together before 12. I'll also go briefly over 13 and 14 for reasons I'll explain later in the post. First, though, let me go over seasons 4 through 11, with some pit stops along the way:
Seasons 4 & 5: this isn’t the destiel you are looking for. the ust is delicious, yes, and i, too, got sucked in posthaste immediately groped by an angel lj community style. At this point Cas is still too alien for anything beyond the development we see on screen happen. HOWEVER, season 5 is the first time we get to see Cas being human (The End) and Cas being less connected to heaven and how that affects his behavior. This will matter. 
Seasons 6 & 7: the pining omg the pining. The notable things I want to point out with these seasons is a. this is the beginning of Cas doing things to spare Dean and it not ending well (Cas dies #1, soulless!Sam); b. Dean is v. sad; and c. we also start noticing the emotional toll of Cas’s divided loyalties and how human he has actually become since s4. Hurty feels all around.  
Season 8: purgaytory babes aw yeah! Still lots of terrible awful pining. This is a turning point with the addition of the bunker as tfw hq: we have a home in play now, a static emotional center. Cas is still off doing his own thing, Dean still wishes Cas would just let him (+ Sam) help out. Cas going off on his own leads to disaster #2 (Angels fall, Cas loses his Grace). For all deliciously angsty get together purgatory fics and spec, there’s too much of a gap between Dean and Cas on Cas’s part due to his guilt over betraying the Winchesters in s6 & slaughtering angels & leviathan. On the other hand, we do see Dean being more emotionally open, but to no avail. Bad timing. This is a trend. [oop also worth noting we get Dean being kinda done with the one night stand thing because always with the adios and ahem also hint hint Cas refusing to stay put]
Seasons 9 & 10: aka Dean and Cas make bad decisions, but mostly Dean. The biggest turning point here is Cas being human for an extended period of time. There is still plenty of spec over the effects of being human on Cas’s Grace and his Soul. What we can say for sure, though, is that Cas is much more human once he becomes an angel again. In contrast to s8, s9 sees Cas being vulnerable and Dean pushing him away (first because of Gadreel, which he didn’t want to do really and that’s even sadder kdjfgksdfj & later because he was pushing everyone away due to the mark).  
9.06 Heaven Can’t Wait: there’s been so much amazing fic and spec about this episode with its fanfiction gap, but I can’t see a deancas get together here, folks. I know, it’s terrible. The lying from Dean and the hurt from Cas, imo, make the distance between them quite insurmountable at this point. While the episode is amazing (Bobo’s debut, too! So ♥) and has some notorious subtext throughout, I just can’t see the character bridging that gap into anything physical, much less emotional. Nevertheless, this episode does show perhaps the first intentional romantic tableaux with Dean and Cas, and that’s not nothing. 
10.16 Paint it Black: from the point Dean gets the mark of cain until the end of season 10, anything between him and Cas is quite impossible. But one of the reasons I’m bringing up this episode in particular is because of the confession scene. For one, it’s a rare bit of emotional honesty from Dean and for two, it tells me that while he and Cas may be well aware of the thing between them, it’s still uncharted waters. Makes sense, too, there’s been A LOT going on since s6.  Anyway, he’s the full confession, so we can put a pin on it:
You know, the life I live, the work I do…I pretty much just figured that that was all there was to me, you know? Tear around and jam the key in the ignition and haul ass until I ran out of gas. I guess I just thought sooner or later, I’d go out the same way that I live – pedal to the metal, and that would be it. [...]  Now, um… recent events, uh… make me think I might be closer to that than I really thought. And…I don’t know. I mean, you know, there’s – there’s things, there’s…people, feelings that I-I-I want to experience differently than I have before, or maybe even for the first time. [...]  Yeah, I’m just starting to think that… maybe there’s more to it all than I thought.
Do you ever see a character having an epiphany and find yourself wanting to cry because this is it right here. Dean is just blatantly admitting he wants more, which all culminates in season 11, so...
Season 11: The pining is still here, but it’s worse now since it’s the whole plot? It’s been *checks calendar* 5 years of this. How are any of us still kicking I don’t know. Your slow burns could never. Cool worth noting points: Cas says yes to Luci (bad decision #2.5, lots of mitigating effects_I don’t actually hold it against him that much but Dean is another story & not entirely rational at this point); for the first time since the early days, Dean and Cas are on equal grounds: they’ve both fucked up a lot and have hurt each other. The issues this season are outside their dynamic. Amara and Lucifer here serve as externalizing forces for Dean and Cas’s problems and by the end of the season we’re getting a clean slate. We’re also getting a new showrunner, so. No wonder. What this season does that is also super important is that it sets up the stage for the possibility of an actual relationship between Dean and Cas, something that has, up until this point, been pretty much impossible. 
11.04 Baby: Y’all know what I’m about to quote here, right? The convo between Dean and Sam about having something with someone who understands the life. Here we still have Dean reverting to the idea that it’s impossible, which is a direct contrast to the openness in 10.16. It’s understandable, though, considering there’s been little reason to think anything like that would be possible (see all the mess and poor timing from seasons past). The quote in question, though, marks a continuing development in on of the things Dean is struggling with this season:
DEAN: Piper? That's awesome. Heather. One-night wonders, man. Shoot, we're lucky we still get that at all.  SAM: Really? You don't . . . Ever want something more? DEAN: I'm sorry, have you met us? We're batting a whopping zero in domestic life, man. Goose eggs. SAM: You don't ever think about something? Not marriage or whatever. But . . . Something? You know, with a hunter? Somebody who understands the life?
Compare this exchange with what we get from 11.11 and 11.19:
11.11 Into the Mystic: I’m bringing this episode as a crossreference to 10.16 and to show again that for all the closeness between Dean and Cas there’s still a marked distance they haven’t yet bridged. Thanks Mildred for the delicious exposition:
Darlin'...If there's one thing I've learned in all my years on the road, it's when somebody's pining for somebody else. [...]  Oh, don't try and hide it now. Follow your heart. Remember?
11.19 The Chitters: Continuing our trek regarding Dean wanting certain things we have this gift of an episode with Jesse and Cesar, and this exchange:
Dean: [with realization] Oh, so … [points back and forth to Jesse and Cesar] Cesar: Yeah. Dean: Okay, that’s… Cesar puts his beer bottle on the table and looks at Dean, while Jesse is being silent. Dean: What’s it like, settling down with a hunter? Cesar: Smelly, dirty. [turns to Jesse] Twice the worrying about getting ganked.
I’d like to point out, too that the fear of getting ganked is thematic when it comes to the tension between Dean and Cas. More on this when we hit s13. 
Alright, now having said that, let’s take a look at season 12. Bear in mind, this is the official start of Dabb’s era, even if he kinda began taking over in 11, and the change in vibes is obvious. In fact, 12 jumped out at me as a turning point in retrospect, after getting smacked by the domesticity of 13 and 14. Under the cut because I can’t shut up, and things are long enough as is. 
Season 12:  Finally, the promise land, y’all. So, what s11 was for Dean in terms of setting up the relationship stage, s12 was for Cas. In its initial beats, any way. Important to keep in mind that until the Kelly debacle, this was the longest Cas has been around the bunker. Things seem remarkably chill. Of course, we’ll notice that there’s still a lot of baggage hanging around because despite Dean and Cas being in a more stable place, they haven’t actually dealt with their interpersonal problems. I didn’t single out directly this episode, but do keep in mind Cas’s declaration in 12.09 First Blood as far as how much the Winchesters matter to Cas & how we also see Dean and Cas be particularly singled out with them seating together in the backseat of the Impala. 
12.10 Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets: This episode, oh my god, the goodness. In the wake of 12.09 we have Dean and Cas in a tiff because Cas mistake #3 (killing Billie and “cosmic consequences”), this is a pattern. Twice the worry of getting ganked, etc etc. But where this episode really shines is through the contrast between Ishim’s obsession with Lily and Cas & Dean’s mutual affection for each other. Ishim sees no difference here and, to him, Cas’s feelings for Dean are a human weakness. Returning to my point about human!Cas, this episode underscores that Cas’s increasing humanity is what puts him in the place where he can want what Dean wants instead of either being too alien to get it (see s4 & 5) or unable to experience it properly (Ishim). 
12.12 Stuck in the Middle (With You): Cas’s trajectory culminates here with the whole I love you (@ Dean), I love all of you (@ Winchesters). Let’s note too that Cas is dying here, in a way that is much more human than going up in light. This declaration of different types of love is entirely human. It’s also a definitive step wrt to Cas and Dean’s relationship because of what happens in 12.19. This. is. it.
Offscreen happenings: Mixtape, how Cas knows the Colt is under Dean’s pillow. This is hella suspicious. 
12.19 The Future: This episode changes everything, y’all (bobo and meredith, folks, bobo and meredith ksjdhfakjshlfksd). Consider watching this episode again and pay attention to some weird things: 1. Dean’s reaction to Cas going awol. Compare it to Sam’s, who is like whoa Dean chill. Now, thought experiment, imagine something happened between Dean and Cas, and then just radio silence from Cas. Imagine how Dean would react with getting ghosted by Cas specifically after something happened between them.  2. Cas comes back to the bunker with the specific goal of stealing the Colt, which he already knew was under Dean’s pillow -- something Sam didn’t even know.  3. “He came into my room and he played me.” So, this quote right there, makes it seem like some seduction for personal gain, right? But Cas clearly knew where the Colt was already, which means something happened before  Cas came back to the bunker. Cas played Dean in seeming to have reconsidered not working with Sam and Dean wrt Kelly. This is still a point of drama, but it leads somewhere else (see s13 & s15). 4. WHEN DID DEAN GIVE CAS THAT MIXTAPE OMG 5. Dean and Cas’s brief convo in Dean’s room is clearly Dean just wanting Cas to stay, so they can work (and be) together -- because they’re better that way. Which, yeah, truth. 
Sequence of events: Cas tells Dean he loves him -- Dean is clearly shook by it -- Dean gives Cas a mixtape (romantic gesture, often a declaration of feelings; in true Dean speak too lolsobs) -- Cas somehow knows the Colt is under Dean’s pillow -- ???? -- Cas goes awol -- Dean acts like he got ghosted by his partner.
Like. Y’all realize they probably had some emotionally constipated getting together moment, right? Something that Dean clearly initially thought meant things were gonna change, now. Something that Cas couldn’t allow to happen until he could give Dean a win. Y’all are seeing this, yeah? I’m not saying they slept together and were full of feelings, except that’s kind of what I’m saying. But ymmv, there are other possibilities beyond sex. The full of feelings isn’t up for debate, though, even if the whole thing is informed by ridiculous amounts of miscommunication. 
Ok, maybe the narrative is still too subtle (?????), but as I said before, looking at 12 with the knowledge of 13 and 14 does offer a new perspective because of the difference in dynamic between Dean and Cas. I know lots of people look at 14, mainly, as having dialed back on the destiel side of things, but I always thought that was a strange take. Largely because they’re so domestic and their dynamic, ie, the lack of tension, reads like an established relationship. It’s a different kind of beast than we have been used to so far, so it does look alien on screen, especially since we “skipped” the conventional getting together cue that would let us change gears. Let’s take a look at 13 and 14, then.
Season 13: Ah, yes, the season of shit gets domestic. The pining? Gone? What? Deancas now reading like an established couple? It’s more likely than you think.
13.1-13.5: Dean’s grief mini-arc. Dude’s acting like a widower. We all know this. I want to gesture towards the reunion moment though with “it’s never too late to start all over again.” To. Start. All. Over. Again. I’m just saying. 
13.6 Tombstone: hi this episode is pure love and Dean is so happy his sweetheart is back from the dead? He’s even ok being Jack’s third dad now? What a time to be alive. Also? apparently Dean and Cas were just having movie night together? Dates? Mutual Pining dates prior to shit going to hell in 12? Do you ever cry? What else are they getting up to offscreen? What else will they get up to off screen? MUCH TO THINK ABOUT. 
Season 14: MORE DOMESTICITY. With some pining because Michael. But...heart eyes when Dean comes back? Watch that scene again with Dean going off to shower. Suspicious. But then shit hits the fan and we’re all sad again. boo. 
14.15 Peace of Mind: Look me in the eye and tell me Dean and Cas talking in the kitchen about Jack doesn’t read like husbands talking about their child. Look me in the eye and tell me Cas just texting Dean to gossip about Sam isn’t coupley asf. 
14.18-14.20: Ah, yes, the divorce arc. Awful. Terrible. The culmination of Dean’s problem in all this: he lashes out, he pushes Cas away, his anger is alienating. Cue all of us suffering. But while Dean is clearly in the wrong in how the deals with his feelings, let’s not pretend some of his anger doesn’t come from a long established issue between him and Cas, which had its last traumatic turn when Cas died in s12. Dean isn’t being rational here; he saw Cas doing something on his own, and he saw that his mother is dead. What else could happen? Why won’t Cas just trust they can work as a team? Divorce arc was entirely too literal. 
But what about what we’re building up in 15? That seems like it could be a getting together plot, too, right? Well, yeah. It could very well be. But I’d argue the tension we’re seeing isn’t a will they or won’t they because they already have. The tension is instead will they or won’t they use their words to talk about the baggage that has kept them from truly being confident about their relationship. There’s a crucial step in their togetherness that they’re still missing, which is also the bedrock of the divorce arc that spanned TWELVE FRIGGIN’ EPISODES. Y’all. Y’all that’s half a season. And we’re not even entirely done with it yet because Dean was cut short in purgatory, and they haven’t dealt with Cas’s side of blame in this mess yet either -- that Cas keeps going off on his own and getting hurt (and getting other people hurt), and Dean has to deal with the fallout. The deep emotional understanding, the truly being on the same page is what we’re on the edge of our seats for. And, you know, that’s a whole lot more exciting than witnessing their for realsies first kiss. I’m also confident Dabb & co will deliver the conclusion to this emotional arc and it will be a whole mess of feelings on all our parts. 
For the moment, though, it’s looking a lot like Dean and Cas had a rocky start to their ~involvement, then DEATH, then they got together feat. sweet sweet domestic fluff, then DIVORCE. So, yeah. Season 12, guys; it’s where it’s at. 
As for the more performative aspect of Dean and Cas’s relationship…that’s a whole other thing and all I can say is they got the green light for something, but I don’t know what it is and it’s driving me bananas, but it’s definitely something and we can talk about that, too. Place your bets, etc.  I’m clowning on the “I love you” pay off because it’s a glaring missing piece in this whole story. See also: holding hands? Carving Cas’s initials on the table? Saileen endgame parallels? All supported by the narrative. Like a lot. So. *finger guns*
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espejonight28738 · 5 years
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15x03 The Rupture, Meta
 Fasten your seatbelts people because I’m back on my bullshit.
So, we finally had the anticipated and dreaded divorce. It hurt like shit, I know, but I think we all can agree it needed to happen, and Cas standing up for himself was amazing. Still, that ain’t what I’m talking about today. No, today we are just analysis one line:
“You and Sam have each other. I think is time for me to move on.”
And you may be thinking, why that one? It’s because the rest of Cas speech is plenty self-explanatory, but this one has so many implications… and I also think is telling us about the future.
So okay, disclaimer here, I love Dean and Sam. I do, and I hate to see people claiming all Destiel shippers hate or ignore Sam, that’s not true.  
Now, that said, this line I think is an explicit call out to Dean and Sam’s unhealthy co-dependency.
Think of it for a moment. The boys just lost their mother, their son, Rowena (their friend), Ketch (a more reluctant, but still kinda-sorta- friend), they kinda lost Kevin all over again. But they haven’t given themselves time to grief, because they need to ‘keep going’ and be strong for each other. And they have this ridiculous idea of “Well, we still have each other, so we need to be okay”
And that’s not true.
For 14 season they have had this unhealthy dependency that keeps them from having stable long-term relationships (of any kind) with other people.  
And Cas is spiting that in Dean’s face. He’s saying “Well, there still the both of you, so I guess nothing else really matters to you, right Dean?”
It’s not the first time someone calls out this unhealthy co-dependency between the Winchester brothers, but it hits different this time. First, the intention; Cas wasn’t trying to mock Dean or to be cruel, he was stating a problem. Second: It’s the first time someone so close to them has actually call it out. It was always externs, enemies, reluctant allies.  
But Bobby, Charlie, Kevin, Jack, Mary, Ellen, Jo, they never said it. Maybe they told them one particular decision was stupid, but that the whole co-dependency was a problem? Never. Castiel never did it before. He was so empathic with them (“You were stupid for the right reasons” for example), never pointed it like a problem.
And now he did, and this is so much more relevant, because he knows them, has been their friend for over a decade, he is (or was, I guess) Dean’s best friend for more than ten years. And Dean always showed him a vulnerability that he never allowed himself to show Sammy, so Cas is one of the people that know Dean the best, if not the one. So, if he points out the problem, I think it would be stupid of us to keep denying it. The series in general… I don’t think they would address it if they didn’t plan on doing something about it.
Now, it wouldn’t be the time the brothers try to do something about this, they have tried and succeed to different degrees, but every time there’s a step in the right direction, there are also like three steps back.
Sam has been the one who has tried the most, but he can’t. He tried to keep himself apart from Dean after he was brought back from The Cage, but in the end he couldn’t just ignore Dean forever. He tried to do it by not looking for a way to rescue Dean from Purgatory and try a life with Amelia (don’t boo me, I hated that story line as much as y’all, and still think it kinda was out of character, but we can’t pretend it didn’t happen). He tried when he left after the whole Gadreel incident, but ya know, Mark of Cain made him go back to Dean, and even if that hadn’t happened, he would have come back eventually, because this can’t be broken in a moment of anger or pure despair, that will just bring them back together with the same co-dependency eventually. And Sam, particularly, can’t bring himself to leave this unhealthiness if Dean doesn’t, because in the end the moment Dean comes back or needs help, any attempt goes to the trash.
This rupture (lol) needs to happen in a frame of stability (meaning, that It won’t bring death to the other, because they would never make a choice that would kill the other, but I think that is just their love, not necessarily the co-dependency). This may look a little bit unrealistic in Supernatural’s world, but it already happened once, in Purgatory. With Dean and Sam.
Dean knew it was hurting Sam the fact that he was there. He knew Sam wanted him to go back, but you know what else did he know? That they had killed the Leviathans, and Sam wasn’t in an imminent danger. He knew Sam would survive if he took more time coming back. And in that moment of “stability”, he didn’t put Sam first. He put Cas. He chose finding Cas so they could go home together over going back immediately to Sam, even though he though Sam would be worried sick looking for them.
Dean gave a step in the right direction.
So, now you are asking, why didn’t anything change?
Because he chose Cas, he consciously chose someone over Sam, and then that person didn’t choose him back. Castiel chose to stay in Purgatory over going home with Dean, and then Castiel chose to run off with the angel tablet instead of trusting him.
So, let’s say it one more time so you can digest it.
He consciously chose someone over Sam, and then that person didn’t choose him back.
Three steps back, now.
But there is something else here, isn’t it? The person (angel, whatever) that Dean chose was Cas. And it’s now Cas calling out this co-dependency, and he’s doing it pretty early in the season.
I think it’s because they will “fix” Sam and Dean’s relationship to one still full of love, yes, and healthy. They will break this endless cycle of anguish that the codependency brings into their family.  
After all of this, we know Sam can’t do it unless Dean does it too, and we know that Dean can do it if there is no immediate danger to Sam. That’s good.
In an ideal world, they would just learn to choose themselves, but Dean and Sam “I would give my life for that bird that just crossed in front of us” Winchester won’t. So, they are getting over their codependency by allowing themselves to choose someone else over their brother, by allowing other people to truly get close to them, no pushing them away. And for Dean, that person will be Cas, I’m pretty sure of it.  
For Sam is a little less certain in my mind, but I suspect it will be Eileen. Honestly, since they announced her coming back, I was really confused about the why. Don’t get me wrong! She’s cool and badass and I love her, and now that we lost Rowena we are in dire need of more recurrent female characters, so it will be really welcome. But why Eileen? Why not, I don’t know, Charlie? Or Jo? Or Ellen? Or Meg? Or even Bela? What move the writers to choose Eileen?
Don’t hate me for this, I hate as much as the next person when a female character only exists for the development of a male character, but I wouldn’t put it past the writers. So, I think they are bringing back Eileen because of the thing she and Sam had going on.  
The cycle of codependency will break not with anger, not with death, and not with resentment. It will be just with the two of them choosing to let someone else to be close enough, and to made the conscious election of choosing them over their brother, even if not in a life-death situation. Dean will choose Cas, and Sam will choose Eileen.
I’m not sure they will make Destiel canon, but they at least will heavily parallel their “friendship” to Sam and Eileen’s romantic relationship. Most probably they will just parallel. (But they don’t call me a clown for nothing, so I won’t lose hope of #canon destiel just yet. We’ll see in my future metas how’s that hope hanging on XD).
@metafest
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lassies · 5 years
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klonopin rambles
(insert the amazing deancas scene from 15x02)
cas knows that what he did was all him and his choices. him being resurrected again and again was gods meddling. but rebelling for dean,taking on sams insanity, choosing to raise and care for jack, ALL THE THINGS HE DID he did it for the people he loves. motherfucker wasnt even supposed to feel love.
that is ALL castiel babey.
castiel has always been one to disobey heavens orders, of course he was chucks favorite castiel. bc even after a bunch of factory resets, castiel still finds himself rebelling, or atleast questioning heavens orders.
and the apocalypse world cas was not like that, he may have been rebellious in the distant past, but without dean in that world, there is no one to help him down the path of free will. so the castiel we see is a factory reset version...that stuck...(i guess? idk hes different...) and is still taking heavens/michaels orders....not our cas at all. no wonder he abandoned that dimension.
like i bet god was losing his goddamn mind when dean broke through castiels mind control by saying HE FUCKING NEEDS HIM (should be love but ok jensen) which btw was all after naomi literally trained castiel to not hesitate when it came time to kill dean. she made him kill THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS copies of dean to even be considered ready. i bet that shit was also funny to chuck.
like, dean is praying and praying for cas to come back-literally right after he stayed in purgatory for a year, EVEN THOUGH HE HAD A WAY OUT, in order to find castiel and bring him back to earth with him. (and even tho he failed chuck made sure that cas came back to him :))))) )
and while the man who started out thinking prayer was bullshit, is now praying daily for castiel to come back, and castiel is in heaven being forced to kill dean over and over again. damn god probably lost his shit at that one LMFAO. bro. he LOVES that deancas drama. same.
but like dean said in fucking 8x17, he needs castiel. early season 13 is the prime example (dean emo abt cas dying) dean even prayed to god to bring cas back ???? and p sure god was like “nah, not yet.”
but then jack came in and started ruining his story. im sure god would’ve eventually gotten bored without cas (like he did in season 7 👀) and brought him back eventually, but chuck barely got to enjoy all the nephilim and emo dean lashing out drama bullshit before jack fuckin awoke cas in the empty not even that long after castiels death!!! lame!!
i bet that was the first straw for god. and shit! jack killed michael! i bet that made chuck absolutely pissed! (and honestly, scared of this powerful being.)u kno he wanted an apocalypse! and atleast see how the winchesters would deal with it/try to stop it all. but jack stepped in, AGAIN. marys death was perfect though. he could get jack off the board, and even make on of his fathers pull the trigger. good entertainment right there (to chuck atleast lmao).
but the jig is up and chuck has said FUCK this dimension, and undid everything sam and dean ever did. he is leaving them to get massacred, and without gods help, team free will stay dead this time.
except i guess he forgot why he liked those winchesters. they are best out of all the incarnations of them, always able to deal with what god throws at them.
and the hope that they get through this and finally live a life without strings being pulled is whats going to get them through this. but dean needs to recognize that the obstacles were placed by god yes BUT how they ran the course was all them. cas even said this to him. dean is angry that he never had any control of the life ending events in his life, but i hope cas helped him start to realize that he had control on how he handled these obstacles!
the crazy ways he has saved the world, the family he built, the LOVE in his life, was all him!!
castiel tonight said “no dean, what we have is REAL.” and im fucked up rn. castiel knows he loves dean, just like he knows that rebelling for dean fucked up probably like, a million years of the strings being pulled perfectly for the (first, lol) apocalypse. chuck is even surprised by it, the fact castiel has given up everything to help dean and to fight for whats right.
theyre making it up as they go
and guys
THEY FELL IN LOVE
not even on purpose, deancas wasnt in the script (which i can only assume is gods script too). destiel is accidental by the writers, and i think thats a perfect fucking parallel to whats going on here.
like its funny how god is like the writers throwing all these weird ass big bads and high stakes cuz it sounds interesting
and yet the fans care more about the characters and their choices and outcomes and relationships and so on. all of which is what their free will allowed them to do, and that is the huge focus this season.
and while maybe their free will was limited, but they still had it.
and thanks to that free will, or what may they had of it, cas fell in love with dean.
even the writers, and spns god, they did not intend for dean and castiels relationship to evolve into...this...
anyways dean is scared that theyre relationship (no matter platonic or familial or romantic etcetc) is all chucks doing and everything he felt has been fake. but castiel knows god damn well it isnt.
what they have is REAL
and now i can confidently say that castiel loves dean 100%. romantically. obviously i believed it but i mean, i couldnt really explain it well, until this scene of course. this scene hits the nail in the fucking coffin.
im aware that this can be read as that team free will and their actions are all real but while thats true....i truly do not believe that this is what this scene is talking about...
castiel has laid it all out on the table finally, it is now deans turn.
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orionsangel86 · 6 years
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Can we talk about the endgame human-cas vs angel-cas argument? I find it unsettling that a lot of folks think Cas needs to become human; for his good, or Dean's, or narrative. I understand that Cas needs and wants to get away from the other angels, their jobs, their world - but why have to be human? And people who say "I hope he doesn't become an archangel, how awful for him!" Well I think Cas enjoys being an angel - but he's his own sort of angel. He seems to want his powers and identity. Hmph.
It has taken me ages to answer this ask as I’ve been hesitant about it for ages since it will most likely blow up in my face somehow. So look, I’ve answered it here but I also have a disclaimer on my blog that I want you to read because after all the Cas related drama against meta writers last year I need some sort of protection okay:
http://bluestar86.tumblr.com/CasDisclaimer
Please read the link if you expect to be offended by my answer (and if you’re just curious of course).
A lot of other great meta writers have already tackled this, but seeing as you have come for my thoughts specifically I won’t link other posts on the risk of upsetting you. You are clearly already aware of the various discussions that turned into arguments that turned into a huge wank fest so I’m not going to feed into that. 
The problem with the human Cas vs Angel Cas endgame debate,is that it is all just speculation, none of us know what way the writers of the show will choose to take Cas’sstory line. We can only interpret the canon story we have been provided with atthis point. Anything I speculate about future event, could turn out to be totally wrong. But its still fun to speculate anyway. I just want to stress that I am not saying that by disagreeing with me anyone is WRONG. We all have our own opinions after all. 
There are a lot of reasons why people might feel like beinghuman is the best fit and most satisfying endgame for Castiel. There is also alot of evidence in the show that suggests that this is the way Cas’s story isgoing. I don’t particularly think this has anything to do with Dean or destieleither, though there will always be people who do think this.
For starters, the whole concept is a well known TV trope.The immortal character who seeks to be human? Yeah it’s been done before, and whilst this isn’t necessarily a good thing, it is a commonthing that we have been conditioned for years to expect in basic storytelling.The fact that this often comes attached to the love trope that said immortalgives up immortality so they can be with a human is just an added bonus forDestiel shippers.  
So even without exploring the evidence within the show, thevery idea itself is already a favourable one for most people because it fits astandard storytelling trope that resonates with people. It is a comment on thepower of humanity, and also makes us all feel a bit better to think about theidea that an immortal being would prefer to be human than continue to havetheir godlike power and eternal life (because humanity itself is supposedly agreat gift).
(I should clarify here that I don’t believe that Cas’s fallfrom grace should be connected to Destiel and that Dean would love and be withhim regardless of whether he were angel or human.)
There is every possibility that Supernatural may go againstthe grain here, but the evidence in the show suggests otherwise. Castiel’sstory since his origins in season 4 has been that he is the angel that fallsfor humanity. His love for humanity and continued choice of humanity over hisangelic brethren makes the idea that he would eventually join humanity as oneof them poetic. I think that is why this is the most popular endgame theorywithin fandom over everything else: itis poetic.
Humans generally enjoy poetic stories, as well as ironicones. They are far more satisfying. It feels like the natural conclusion for acharacter such as Castiel, whose journey of self-discovery and acceptance hasoften had him questioning his own place in the world and exactly what kind ofcreature he is meant to be. This is his continued theme throughout his entirerun on the show. The idea that the show would end with him remaining in hiscurrent state, or even elevated to something such as an archangel just feelswrong for his development. I can understand why people would consider that “awful”for Castiel. You say that he “seems to want his powers and identity” but youmiss the point the show is trying to explain to us, that his identity is not tied to his powers. In fact, in the later seasons, it can be argued that hispowers have held him back from really understanding who he really is:
I know that there is a big split here in fandom, but I dofeel that those fans who desperately want Cas to stay an angel have anemotional attachment to the idea because it resonates with them on a personal levelthat he is currently “different” so for him to become “normal” feels like aninsult to those fans. It is the same way those fans who view him as asexualfeel I believe. These are delicate issues. When you want a character to be likeyou and you identify with them so greatly, for the show to then fundamentallychange that character in any way feels like a big hit to you personally. But Ithink this is why there needs to be some detachment between what we personallyfeel attached to, and Castiel’s own story that the show itself (via subtext,narrative structure, and text in certain places) is telling us.
(I should also disclaim here that I am in no way against asexual readings of Castiel and don’t want this to come across this way, as there is certainly room for that interpretation in the text - my own personal view on Cas’s sexuality is “undefinable” )
Aside from the narrative poetry of Cas’s eventual fall fromgrace to humanity, I think the reason a lot of us believe it is the naturalconclusion to his story arc is just the sheer amount of evidence and textualunanswered questions that seem to be leading this way.
There are the parallels to Anna early on, and how it isimplied heavily that he also desires those things that she does.
The constant questions that Cas is never able to answer:
“As what Castiel? As anangel? Or a man?” (no answer) -  9x06Heaven Can’t Wait
“I am an angel.” “andyou’re okay with that?” “If we’re going to war, I need to be ready” (hardlya yes) -  9x09 Holy Terror
“Who are you?” (noanswer) “What are you now? A penitent?” “I’mnothing” (not exactly positive) – 9x14 Captives
“No! If I’m gonna die,I want answers. Like, who are you now? Like, you’re obviously not an angel ofthe Lord. And what about all of this walking the earth like Caine from “KungFu” crap? Cleaning up Heaven’s messes. How many more rogue angels are there outthere? And, what are you gonna do once you’re done with all that? Go back toHeaven? Please. The angel formerly known as Hannah has restored order up top.Smoothest it’s run since God cut the ribbon on the pearly gates. So tell me,Castiel, truly, what is your mission now?” (Cas told Metatron to shut up –but Metatron had a point) – 10x18 Book of the Damned
“Brother? Ha! What areyou?” “W-what? I’m an angel of the Lord.” “That so? ‘Cause, near as I can tell,when you have to choose between heaven and the Winchesters …” “You choosethem.” 11x02 Form and Void
Then to go along with these questions, Castiel himself hadsome very interesting conversations. In 9x11 the talk with Sam about peanutbutter and how Castiel used it to describe the things he missed about beinghuman was particularly enlightening for those of us who now believe that this is his endgame. He basically called his angel-hood “disgusting”.
When he spoke to Daniel at the start of season 10, Danieljust wanted to stay on earth and experience humanity. The conversation he hadwith Hannah was most interesting. Remember that Daniel was a Cas mirror here. Aglaringly obvious Cas mirror:
Hannah: “You are anangel, once and forever.”
Daniel: “Droppedunwillingly…Unknowingly…Into a strange land, a land that, as it turns out,celebrates the free, the individual. For the first time in thousands of years,I have choices. And with each choice… I begin to discover who I really am.”
Hannah: “This isnonsense.”
Daniel: “Because theydon’t teach you this in heaven? Perhaps they should. Then you would understandwhy it’s worth fighting for… What I’ll never understand is why angels won’tacknowledge the wisdom to be found down here.”
Hannah: “What wisdomis to be gained from humans?”  
Daniel: “I’m notspeaking to you.”
Hannah (To Castiel): “Doyou understand what he’s…” (Cas never answered, but it was obvious hedid)
This whole conversation imo is foreshadowing Cas choosing tostay on earth with the humans, and when this is then followed up with this:
Castiel: “Well,perhaps I’ve been down here with them for too long. There’s seemingly nothingbut chaos. But not all bad comes from it. Art. Hope. Love. Dreams.”
Hannah: “But t-thoseare human things.”
Castiel: “Yes.”
It implies that Castiel is longing for the humanexperience.
Later on in 10x03 Cas textually states his reasoning forwanting to stay an angel however:
“You know, only humanscan feel real joy, but … also such profound pain. This is easier.”
He said it in relation to Dean’s choosing to stay a demon,but he understood exactly. Cas longs for the human experience, but he can’thandle the pain of it, hence his choice currently to remain an angel (eventhough it isn’t what he really desires).
This sentence by Cas was a direct response to what he saidearlier in 9x23:
“I just want to be an angel”
Because when Cas said that, he was mourning the death ofDean. It was the easy choice for him. It was less painful to remain an angelthan to go back to being human. It’s not good enough evidence imo that Cas shouldremain an angel for his endgame because he said it when he was deeply mourningthe loss of Dean and it was framed extremely negatively by the show and thenwas countered continuously in early season 10 in the subtext of every conversation he had with Hannah.
Most of these examples came out of seasons 9 and 10 however, but as I always say, the endgame arcs for all the three main characters were laid out in seasons 8 - 10 and Dabb is expanding on those concepts. One of the interesting things from the later seasons and Dabb era that I have noticed is just how little Castiel uses his powers now. Most of the time we either see him fighting normally, or trying out his new hunter knowledge to solve a case. What I truly believe Dabb’s goal with Cas’s endgame is to show Cas that he is wanted and needed and loved and useful without his powers. Because it has been tied heavily to his depression arc in seasons 11 and 12 that Cas doesn’t feel useful or powerful enough. The whole point is for Sam and Dean to show Cas that they want him with them regardless of how powerful he may or may not be. For Cas to become empowered, without literal powers. 
The main issue that we have with Cas being powered up, is that for character development purposes, it makes no sense. How is Cas supposed to learn his lessons that way? If he becomes this super powerful being? How is that gonna help him get over his issue with only being ‘useful’ or a ‘hammer’ or to stop him obsessing about his ‘missions’? What meta writers tend to scream about is that Cas doesn’t yet seem to realise that it’s not his powers that make him important to the boys, but just HIM. We have not had this clearly resolved in the show, and it won’t be, until the damage that was done in season 9 is finally healed. Cas has gone through a fundamental change since the end of season 8 and this arc is not yet resolved. Powering him up even further will only hinder this character development arc, not assist it. 
Remember how in 12x19 Cas made so many terrible decisions because he was so desperate “for a win” for both Dean and himself? Remember how in 13x05 we were screaming because Dean just wanted a win and then Cas showed up? Remember how in 13x06 Dean told Sam explicitly that Cas was his win?
Cas doesn’t need to be powerful for him to be needed and wanted by Dean (and Sam), but HE STILL DOESN’T KNOW THIS. NONE OF THIS HAS BEEN MADE CLEAR TO CAS. We still haven’t had a resolution to Cas’s own issues that were made so very clear in 12x09. That he doesn’t feel competent enough on his own.
This is why to power Cas up even further, or to keep him with his grace in tact, doesn’t really seem to fit the story structure. Cas needs to learn that its not his powers that make him special, its fundamentally HIM. It’s what he used to face the empty entity, its what brings a smile to Dean’s face whenever he’s around, it’s what made Jack choose him as his father (though not made explicitly clear, it is heavily implied that it was Castiel’s goodness that made Jack choose him - because Jack hardly needs protecting - more just the right kind of guidance).
It’s my opinion that Cas will choose to become human at endgame (or before who knows) because his grace is holding him back. Its not even about his obligations to heaven or the Winchesters, I personally don’t think he should lose all ties with all the angels, because I think there is still a lesson that the remaining angels need to learn here and that Cas will be the one to teach them (along with Jack). Its about Cas’s inner struggles and his personal growth, rather than the relationships he has with others. Its about Castiel finally asking himself “Who am I?” “What do I want?” “Where do I belong?” and answering those bloody questions. Perhaps he can answer those questions and keep his grace, its possible sure, but then all of that talk about human things in season 10 wouldn’t have made much sense, and Cas will always be missing something fundamental. The human things that he never got to really enjoy last time. The human pleasures that Dean revels in so much. I think it would be damn tragic to reach the end of his story and not have him indulging in the things we KNOW canonically he longs for. 
Because as the Empty Entity said in 13x04
I have tiptoed through all your little tulips, your memories, your little feelings yes, I know what you hate, I know who you love, I know what you fear...
But remember that feelings, that love and fear, along with hope and dreams are human things and Castiel shouldn’t have to be always torn in two. Right now, that’s what he is. Half an angel, half a man, lost and conflicted. As far as I am concerned, Castiel becoming human answers all the questions the story has been asking him, and provides him with a level of happiness and satisfaction that he could never have whilst still an angel. For his own personal growth arc, imo its the only logical outcome.
I’m sorry if this isn’t what you wanted to hear nonny, but I am just trying to interpret this show logically with the information I have been given, and that all points to a human Cas endgame. As I said at the start of this post. I could be wrong. I could be interpreting all the wrong signals here, but the thing is, we meta writers are not a hive mind, and we sure as hell disagree on a LOT of things about this show, as we all have our own ways of interpreting things, but the majority of meta writers I follow also believe that Cas’s endgame is to be human and we all came to that conclusion individually based on information the show presented. Yes we could all still be wrong, and no I am not saying that any other opinions are incorrect because, and I stress this, all interpretations are valid. But please don’t get upset that I don’t agree with you over this. We just see things differently. You did ask for my opinion after all, so I gave it.
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amwritingmeta · 6 years
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My dear, you are the most interesting writer of the fandom. I truly believe without knowing you in person that you are a fine human being. This I'm asking you, because I recall a piece of Meta you wrote almost a year ago about how it will be difficult to make Destiel Canon, because of the nature of show business. Now, about your last post of the color purple. Let me ask you honestly, you don't think at some point that all this things are a proof of queerbating if Destiel doesn't go Canon? Thanks
Hello, lovely Nonny! And oh wow *blushes violently* that’s one helluva compliment. And I must stress that I’m the most average human being to ever average! But thank you for saying such sweet things! Jeez Louise what a way to spend a Sunday! :D
And omg what a callback to the early days! I do remember that post, actually. It was in response to a queerbaiting discussion, but I cannot find the original to save my life so I’ll just run with it:
I do need to clarify that I believe what I said wasn’t that it is/will be/would be difficult to make Destiel canon because of the nature of show business, but rather that our fucked up world, and what it means for a show to launch itself with a queer lead, has informed how Dean Winchester and his presentation has been handled in the media and by the cast and writers/show runners. 
And, naturally, how Dean Winchester is presented must inform how Destiel is handled as well. Because Dean is our protagonist. 
I mean, this is my theory here and I cannot prove a single word of it, so take all of this with grains of salt - all I can give you is what makes sense to me when looking at the narrative and what I see as the intent of that narrative.
Whether Dean was always meant to be the protagonist, or meant to be the secondary character to Sam’s protagonist (roles which are established in the Pilot), is of little consequence here, what matters is that you can trace bi-Dean back to the Pilot. That side to his personality is present in the Pilot. Dean was always meant to be queer coded. Why not overtly so?
Well, the way I see: the show wanted a predominantly male audience for a reason. Because the show is about deconstructing the masculine ideal and teaching boys and men that denying who you are based on the terribly old-fashioned belief that “feelings make you weak” is not only wrong, but detrimental because the truth is this –>
–> you choose who to be, and you can be ANYONE YOU IDENTIFY YOURSELF AS
–> no one can ever tell you it’s wrong
–> there is no weird, everyone’s normal in their own way
–> and what makes a “man” is not fucking defined by the social norm bullshit of patriarchal gender oppression!!
*and breathe*
Granted, had the show actually ended in S5, this message wouldn’t have been as impactful as it is now, after thirteen years of character journey and evolution, after thirteen years of self denial and fear of happiness. But had the show ended in S5 I’m still convinced we could’ve gotten a reflection of what we’re driving towards now.
S5 could easily have climaxed with Sam and Dean ending the codependency, and Dean - instead of mistrusting Sam being able to defeat Lucifer - actually letting him go, letting him grow up, telling him “you got this”
It could easily have ended with a different angle on Cas’ arc, set up in S4 with Anna and echoed in 5x04 with Endverse human!Cas, where Cas actually chooses to give up his grace and ends up human for that final fight (not just rendered powerless and human-esque after carving that sigil into his chest)
And with Cas human, he would not have gone back to Heaven, we would have ended with Cas and Dean in the Impala, and I can see how the flirting that Dean tries to start up in 5x03 with the Thelma and Louise moment could’ve been built on throughout the season to TELL us that Dean is undeniable attracted to Cas and that it runs deeper than that and, once Cas chose humanity, they would’ve given us this love story in text for the end of the season because Cas would recognise his own feelings as well
And, you know, we could’ve gotten Sam back - the search for God and the hopelessness it rendered ending in God revealing himself and repaying Sam’s sacrifice with life and freedom… 
Because S5 is all about daddy issues in need of resolution and the codependency between the brothers highlighted (as it is in most seasons of course)
But, be aware, this is truly, truly just me seeing possibilities in the structure of the narrative and hell, I’m not going to pretend I actually know the mind of Eric Kripke, yeah? Yeah, no. 
But I honestly, truly believe the pattern of Dean’s bisexuality is there for a narrative reason, which means the reason I got into the queerbaiting discussion was to refute the claims and state my disagreement with them, because you can’t call it queerbaiting when the narrative function of this incredibly important character detail is hit on again and again and again on the show. 
It’s not there for the shits and giggles, you know? It’s not there as some sort of hook for the LGBTQ community. It is a key component of Dean Winchester’s character makeup and it’s at the heart of the reason why he ever needed to go through this journey in the first place, this journey of opening up to love and to being loved for who he is by letting go of his preconceived notions of who he has to be, notions that it’s established in canon have been informed by toxic masculinity.
And this is one of the most powerful why-hearts of any story: searching for one’s true identity and, in doing so, having to face one’s deepest fears and conquer them. 
The deconstruction of the masculine ideal is being done through Dean finding a reason to shed his toxic masculinity, and this reason is tied to his love for Cas. 
Could this have been done with Cas being a woman? YES! That’s the whole point for me. 
Cas’ gender is not important for Dean’s character progression or the role Cas plays in ensuring it - Cas the CHARACTER and his PERSONALITY are what’s important. The way these two men compliment each other emotionally are what’s important. The way they challenge and push and support each other’s growth is what’s important. This is why it has always been a love story - from first frame of footage. (to my mind) (I know not everyone agrees with this assessment)
And the POINT of Cas being a man instead of a woman is, for me, that it pushes the deconstruction of the masculine ideal to its very breaking point, because the ideal is idiotic and prescribes to societal norms that, honestly, are beginning to flake at the edges in modern society as is, thank goodness. 
The ideal is gender normative - men are men and women are women and everything is black and white and straightforward. So to build Dean Winchester into the epitome of the masculine ideal - the man’s man, the stud, the cowboy, the hero - and have him still retain all the qualities that make him that man’s man, that stud, that cowboy, that hero - while also softening him and opening him up and revealing that deep emotional life and all that longing for love and communication and equality and all the personality traits he’s always possessed (and we’ve always seen them) that, according to societal norm, are considered feminine, well, that’s a deconstruction of the masculine ideal worth writing home to grandma about, know what I’m saying?
Consider a woman being the one to open him up to love. Well, we kind of got that with Lisa, didn’t we? Only she wasn’t real. She was a representation of what Dean wants for himself: home love family - but she was, in the end, proven an illusion. Dean was not happy playing house: because he was playing house, still stuck in playing a part he never chose for himself because of course Dean Winchester was never meant to give up the life. The reason he’s broken and lost isn’t that he was raised a hunter (saving people gives his life great meaning and purpose), but that he’s stuck performing. 
So what if Cas was a woman? 
Yeah. He could’ve been a woman. But the fact that Cas is a man adds a layer to Dean’s search for his true identity that would otherwise be lost. Without the love story being Dean falling for a man, they have no real narrative way to highlight his bisexuality without baking it into the narrative simply to have him be a bisexual character. Make sense?
And they didn’t build Dean as overtly bisexual because if they had:
he would have been immediately put in a character niche and the audience they want to appeal to –>
the audience that believes in the masculine ideal as truth, or that are subconsciously influenced by it daily –>
that audience would’ve been lost to them –>
because they would’ve thought “gay” and switched channel –>
no matter how man’s man and heroic Dean Winchester still is with that pink/purple/blue label across his chest
Men enjoying following the story of a man who is attracted to other men will make the men following that story question why they enjoy it, and no man’s man wants to start wondering about their own sexuality. (yup that is a generalisation but one that is based in truth no?) 
“Liking bisexual Dean Winchester might mean I’m gay. So thanks but no thanks. Moving on.”
Like I said: societal norms = stupidity. Okay, actually, that’s not fair or true. The societal norms equal narrow mindedness and fear. And this is always forgivable, because it’s addressable and changeable. 
But this is also the reason why Dean is not canonically in our faces bisexual. (though he might as well be) (like sheesh doesn’t take a magnifying glass)
And this ^^^ is why Cas needs to be a man. Because it completes the deconstruction of the masculine ideal to such a degree, while retaining Dean Winchester’s already established characteristics, because Dean will still be all Dean once he’s actually with Cas, that the question of “What makes a man a man?” should be a resounding one. 
Is Dean Winchester not a badass, brave and tough as nails hero simply because he has softer sides and fancies dudes - one dude in particular? 
Of. course. he. fucking. is.
You are a man because you identify as a man; liking flowery wallpaper and crying your eyes out to Charlotte’s Web does not somehow transform you into something other or lesser than a man. Like… WHERE THE FUCK DID THIS IDEA EVEN COME FROM WHY DOES ANYONE ADHERE TO IT SOMETIMES I JUST
Now, about your last post of the color purple. Let me ask you honestly, you don’t think at some point that all this things are a proof of queerbating if Destiel doesn’t go Canon?
Yeah, so why am I going into great detail to clarify my stance on the structure of this narrative and the approach to Destiel through the presentation of Dean Winchester as the masculine ideal? To answer this ^^^^^ part of your ask!
Because all of the above statements and my view on how this narrative has been built, the way the characters have been built, the way all of it fits together, including my colour theory that you mention :), all of it is the reason why I argue so strongly against the queerbaiting allegations.
And it’s why I cannot, for even one second, fathom that where we’re headed is not towards positive endgame and the tying up of our love story.
Destiel, to me, is already canon. Subtext is such an important part to any text and absolutely no doubt hands down it’s extremely important to the SPN text. 
Dean’s character progression and evolution to where he’s at right now has been built through subtext, and through the deeper subtextual bond he shares with Cas. 
What’s telling is that this becomes even clearer when Cas has been missing from the narrative. Dean made leaps and bounds worth of character growth while thinking Cas dead in S7 (Sera knew what she was doing) and we got a sharpened and focused callback to the depiction of that loss in S13. (gorgeous stuff) Not to mention how Dean has acted as a catalyst for Cas’ character progression and evolution.
This is how you build a love story.
And this is why I’ve been saying since last summer that if we don’t get this love story pushed to the forefront in undeniable ways in S13 I will eat that over-priced and not-yet-purchased hat as self-punishment for being crap at interpreting this narrative, but the way S13 is going… 
All this stated, yes, of course, if they somehow fail to follow through then it will be the greatest case of queerbaiting in the history of fandom. 
But I believe, with every fibre of my being, that they’re following through. 
Okay, that got away from me a little, but it was very enjoyable to readdress the issue of SPN and queerbaiting and I’m amazed you remember that post!! Thanks so much for asking, lovely! And I hope I answered your question. :)
xx
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coffeeteaitsallfine · 3 years
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Hi there this is 8hr destiel supercut anon again. In response to your comments: tragically the Colette and Cas parallels didn’t make the cut but I’ve picked up on at least some of them elsewhere and yeah INSANE
And oh man it sounds like I missed out on some prime Dean details in s11. Still even with just what I saw, at least from a destiel angle since I can’t speak to the rest, I’m a bit shocked that s11 isn’t more loved. Truly some of the most hard-hitting content yet. Also while I might not have gotten every detail I sure did get:
Dean, every 5 minutes: so yeah obviously we gotta deal with God’s evil sister/end of the world and all, but we’re all agreed that saving Cas is our first priority, right?
Literally everyone, Cas included: How many times do we have to tell you that no, nobody at any point has agreed to that, actually,
Also it’s such a small detail but Dean going to check on Cas and Sam going to check on Chuck after Lucifer is expelled hit unreasonably hard because it just. Hit that there’s no way that’s reversed. No way Dean is going to check on Chuck while Sam goes to Cas. I saw a post floating around saying ‘how do we know Dean is in love with Cas? Because Sam isn’t’ and like. Yeah
Hi omg i either never realized i got this message or was so busy and forgot about it. I literally never check my inbox since i rarely get anonymous messages and if i do its usually on my phone so it shows up in my activity, i answer and post it. this is embarassing...but back in march i was very busy with work (I’m a teacher) and going through it.
Anyway... yes there is a huge difference in the way sam thinks about cas vs dean. yes theyre two different people but its not in small ways. the thing about sam going to check on chuck is a little different since i think thats more a storytelling/filmmaking thing choice than JUST a characterization bit. however, whats the most damning is the way sam and dean worry for Cas’ safety. When Cas is possessed by lucifer Dean is worried 110% vs Sam’s 90-100%. Sam is worried but less catastrophically worried. he trusts and respects cas’ decision and knows he’s not like any other not totally compatible human being a vessel. Still, Dean would have been just as beside himself even if the situation where less dire or less likely to end tragically, in my opinion. Strikingly, he stops thinking of Cas’ body/vessel as a vessel. jimmy’s not there anymore and that body was completely destroyed and rebuilt by chuck in s5--so yeah it is more cas at this point than before. Meanwhile Sam does not totally see the body as no longer just a vessel vs Dean “it’s not an IT sam it’s Cas.” Dean is much more emotionally attached than Sam is as a general rule to physical things momentos whatever. Regardless, he is right no matter what since Cas is the main reason the VESSEL is able to hold lucifer so long not the vessel on its own. 
But. this moment is a standout moment for me highlighting not their priorities but their perspective regarding Cas in a mostly emotional way right before Dean is given a spotlight in this scene being the one to mostly attempt to communicate to him inside. 
Idk if that moment made it into the destiel supercut but....if not i’d recommend actually sitting down and watching the whole show or at least more entire episodes start to finish. it really provides more context that a cut just can’t do in my opinion. A lot of people just want to skip to S4 and i get that but if you want to truly understand why S4-5 is the way it is you need to watch some of S1-3--especially if you want to truly understand why Dean is the way he is (in 4x01 onward but also just in general those early seasons lay the groundwork that they expect you to just already know about later).
i have NO idea if you still follow me but if you do and read this you GOTTA let me know more of your thoughts especially on S13. Did you watch the whole show????? would you be interested? i’d happily provide you with a condensed list of required episodes so you can skip filler episodes--which theres a lot of in the early seasons.
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