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the-eyes-of-andyserkis · 3 months

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[ Part One ] - [ Part Two ] - [ Part Three ] - [ Part Four ] - [ Part Five ] - [ Part Six ] - [ Part Seven ] - [ Part Eight ]

Fiiiiinally starting to gif "Black Panther". I'll link them all together as they're posted (and I think I'm going to create a masterlist for all my other gifs as well), but here we go. 🫠

#ulysses klaue #ulysses klaue gifs #black panther #my gifs #such a menace #the fucking wink before he commits murder #thinking about my dirty napkin of a man #even when he's all cleaned up #andy serkis #mcu

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julykings · 10 months

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goodbye july hello august

#let’s seee last month was fun.. went to Michigan went to a nude beach went to pride ! have been going to the gym and getting strong <3 #and got that crazy sunburn #today has also been so nice … woke up after spending the night at my bf’s + cuddled with his cat all morning while he went to work #and did some cleaning and dishes for him and made breakfast for when he got home <3 then we went to the lake and swam and took naps #in the sun and smoked and got in n out and watched the amazing race …. living lyf #going to do some work rn before the gym this evening !! loving u #personal

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enden-k · 5 months

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taru, somewhere in the waters for who knows how long after he broke out from underwater jail, possibly reliving abyss trauma or smth, while fontaine is about to be flooded :

"yea hell be fine"

my bbg falling and scraping the entirety of his ass in a tournament :

#i rewatch the scene and THE INSANE FEELINGS I GET GAAAAAAAAH I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF HIS BRUISES AND CARE FOR HIM #HE HAS BAD POSTURE AND BACK PAINS AND IS IN HIS THIRTIES HE DEF TWISTED SMTH HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW EXIST AND CRY ABOUT GETTING OLD even tho he #never did so before bc 30 is not old at all but still young but its rather the realiziation that he indeed is getting older and feeling it #so its settling in and giving him a crisis he accidentally got himself into when he was just meaning to whine about his bone pains and #haithams just looking blankly into the camera before he continues cleaning his cuts and scrapes and tells him to calm down and stop fussing #and then kaveh eventually calms down from the entire tournament and the fall and brainwash attempt and the thing about his father and sees #that his reaction rlly was just piled up from everything that had happened today and just got out over smth as trivial as some aching bones #(and prob a twisted knee or smth)#im rambling its my mushy brain #i should focus on doing the trial LMAO #babbles #genshin tag

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andromeda3116 · 4 months

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planning to make a move tonight with this guy and deeply terrified even though i know he's interested, he's made it very clear that he's interested but putting the ball in my court to decide what, if anything, i want and i've made up my mind to pursue this but like. i've been single since the obama administration because there's not, like, a person-shaped hole in my life, i don't need to be with someone to feel whole, and i have to make room in my life for another person and idk how to do this and i hate feeling vulnerable or exposed or out of control and giving someone else the power to hurt me and having to just. trust that they won't. but i kind of... accidentally already gave him that power without realizing it. i kind of... feel like this is just acknowledging something that's already started.

i am. so nervous.

like, a little giddy, a little eager, a lot anxious for no reason other than how terrified i am of major changes even when i feel like they're good ones and. and. and.

#i am having to force myself to eat #i have cleaned the whole apartment. i am shaking like a leaf. i will 100% need a glass of liquid courage.#i've already told all my family that i'm doing this so i can't chicken out.#it just feels like... it's time. we're here. we've reached this point.#he won't be over here for like four more hours and my brain is eating itself.#this is going to be comical probably i am just going to have to come out of the gate with it bc if i wait i'll chicken out.#i've been trying to come up with what to say all week but i know my mind is going to go blank and i'll end up babbling.#he knows about my issues with vulnerability. he knows about my anxiety. he knows about... me.#he'll probably pick up on the gist of it even if i'm stumbling through what i need to say #hnnngh #i feel like komi from komi can't communicate when she accidentally calls tadano #like bouncing around the room ''panic panic panic panic''#and its been all day of this and like probably four more hours of it and ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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puppyeared · 6 months

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Jitterbug

#whenever my meds kick in it feels like im gonna piss myself. not literally but its really really feels like it #and now whenever that happens my mind goes back to pancho (grandmas dog) at a xmas party years ago #bc he peed when we arrived bc he was so excited to see ppl and my cousin had to clean it up :o)#well for better or for worse i know that feeling now when im pumped on 20mg of adderall #im still getting used to this whole diagnosis thing cause ive gone untreated and undiagnosed for the longest time. so theres probably a lot #i still dont know and have to learn to get myself to be.. functional on my own? self managing????#i even set up reminders on my phone for work periods meals and stuff. but the problem is actually getting myself to stick to that to a T #because the minute i slack off or something gets in the way it throws it all off until i can be bothered to get back on track. it sucks #at least ive built up other habits like writing notes and setting alarms ahead of time.. but i feel like i could do better #its always hard to change something if youve been doing it wrong for the longest time. especially behaviour and thinking patterns. sigh #in other news my glasses bailed on me so i have to get a new pair sometime. i just realized i never draw my sona with glasses but thats #mostly bc i forget. id love to get some browline glasses like my old pair but im picky and its hard to find one id like for the next 5 year #i also finally managed to collect all the fish in my animal crossing file!!! pulled out a char last week and boom now i have a poster :o)#THAT was a moment where i almost peed myself for real. id love to get all the bugs but i cant stay up late on the switch :o(#yapping #my art #myart #doodles #personal #diary

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prettyhighforawhiteguyblog · 4 months

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I'm the wife in my marriage.

It's funny to me anyway. Funny to me because my wife is the very picture of femininity, loving, caring, sexy, pretty, beautiful wife, loving and adored by all her children. And a satisfied and hot for her husband.

But to me she is beautiful and terrible as the Dawn! Treacherous as the Seas! Stronger than the foundations of the Earth! All shall love her and despair!

And yet she chose me.

So to all the hella ladies who rejected my advances? Y'all missed out. Because she saw in me what way too many people couldn't. And sometimes still can't.

And she wants to run my life. And the lives of our whole family. And we all kinda love it. Mostly. But it ain't worth the headache or heartache of fighting her on anything. She's Daddy's little princess and her mother is the loving matron and queen bitch of the family and we all stay in line. Mostly. I love to do my own thing too much for my own good. But it keeps our fights about stupid stuff instead of my weed use again.

(I'm dead ass functional and present from 6am on till I finally get my insomniac ass too sleep while high just to escape the constant anxiety about my sick daughter's upcoming surgery, my dying suegro, my mourning wife, disturbed autistic son, special needs princess Daddy's girl I'm spoiling her to death to make her just as powerful and ungovernable mother and it's working too well already. Have you ever negotiated with a hostile bitchy entitled as fuck child? )

Anyway, you wouldn't know it looking at me or talking normal chitchat, but I'm pretty fucking manly. In the way my culture defines manliness. I'm not very masculine. But I'm very manly.

I'm feminine as fuck in my household. I mother the kids, help their emotional development, work on my wife's emotional and mental well-being, and I'm the one never in the mood for sex. And I do every single thing she says. And then she does the discipline and management of the family's affairs. And she's the one who has to seduce me. Did I mention she was sexy as fuck? (While I'm awkward as fuck every time we even roleplay.) And a horny Latina. (That's why these horny sexy, nice, Latinos are taking over. It's natural selection. The Whites just can't compete and as usual are getting their panties in a twist over not being able to compete even with everything in their favor to out reproduce them all but it was too many kids for a nuclear family to handle Whites.) So beautiful hot queen sexy as fuck Latina seduces me every night. #blessed. So fuck yeah I don't wanna fuck up this arrangement. So I do everything she tells me to and treat her real good and let her win every argument and over apologize. Except when I make a rare exception to make a stand in something important or just to make some trouble and have some fun.

Oh yeah. She's a clean freak 😮‍💨 But she's an impatient Latina housewife perfectionist clean freak. So she gets mad at my perfectly good job when company isn't ever coming job and tells me to stop even trying to clean. Go play Minecraft with your daughter to keep her occupied.🤣

I have the best living situation ever. I'll be your bitch my bitchy highness. Just please keep playing with my hair on your lap. Oh, and that sucking my dick the way you do and being right 95% of the time on judgement calls.

So yeah I'm the wife.

And I got a pretty good life.

#and know you know the rest of the story #when i was s younger man i had a good paying job at a factory plant as a temp worker #i liked this job #and it was easy clean indoor temp controlled light labor with a jovial #kindly and generally loving crowd of people all just trying to earn a living in this shit economy #and care for each get along with each other #it was a really nice atmosphere. there was only a little manager taking advantage of a woman's situation to force a relationship.#but she was petty please about the whole arrangement because she was lonely and he was kind and likable and #good looking younger guy #and it made her job impossible to get the boot #even as it got easier to boot #anyways i worked my ass off and just tried to get along with the boss #and it paid great #We could have been poor and happy working jobs like that for life if i really had to got some reason #but anyways this bossman manager sees me sweeping my ass off a clean floor and instead of telling me to go lean on a post for a bit #tells me I'm doing a good job #and that I'll make a someone s fine wife someday #i wanted to slap that smug mother fucker up there head w my broom. But i was laughing to hard at that fuckers joke because i liked the guy.#and i liked my job #anyway #here i am being a good little wife #and I'm living the life of Reilly doing it #i don't know the etymology of that phrase is. only my Dad says it in my experience #it might be good own little creation.#you're welcome #And the mother fucker just let me keep sweeping my dumbass all over a clean floor!#Union strong

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dayurno · 1 month

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one thing though that i thought was very interesting in tsc was how jeremy and kevin swapped some key personality traits the fanon associated with them. kevin being a grounded, stable pilar vs jeremy being (though well-intentioned & kindly) pushy and falling into codependency with jean like many of us assumed would be the inevitable outcome of kevin and jean reconciling. quite surprising!

#ill be honest with you babygirls im still grappling with jeremy in my mind #hes not much of anything to me #jean sucked all the personality out of him and thats not even a sex joke #i think jeremys highest points are when he is away from jean #and there are not nearly enough of those despite him being the other main character #but when he was with jean so much of it was him worrying about and cleaning up after jean #theres truly so little about him as a person #which i was a little disappointed by because tfc is remarkably good at characterization even of side characters #i know jean is a big personality and anyone put up against him will feel like stale bread but kevin and renee and neil held their own #just fine #i know his story is far simpler than jean’s will ever be but there are ways to go about it #unfortunately for me jeremy felt like neurotypical gansey #and that’s a dreary description #i was rooting for himmmmmmm i was rooting for him!#txt #jeremy #kevin #tsc

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sysig · 6 months

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Delusions (Patreon)

"Could I have your hand, sir?" Max didn't move, which Dexter was, sadly, getting used to.

"Sir?" Max jerked, then turned and stared at him, lost and blank. "Your hand, please."

Max's hand lifted shakily, and he laid it gently in Dexter's upturned palm. Dexter gave a quick and quiet "thank you," then turned it over in his own hand, observing him closely.

Too closely - his knuckles were rough and his fingernails were dull and cracked in places. His once-soft, not-a-day-in-his-life-subjected-to-hard-labour hands were now, already, toughened and split and scarred in places, especially the heel of his palm. He turned it over again, this time to stop looking so intensely. He had only wanted to give it a cursory glance to begin with.

"Do you know what I see, sir?" he asked as conversationally as he could manage, running his fingers along Max's abused flesh. He seemed to be at least half paying attention, his eye gazing down between them, and he'd occasionally twitch, encouragingly Dexter thought. He seemed to want to curl around him, then stopped and shook, his hand squeezing into a fist. Dexter coaxed him back out, encouraged him to hold himself lightly.

"What do you see?" He was almost startled by Max actually continuing their conversation, that happened so rarely now, shaking and quiet as it was. He took a deep breath, was he really going to do this?

"I see a hand, with five fingers." Max remained quiet, though his brow curled, and a guarded look came into his eye, though he still wasn't looking at Dexter. He felt a pang of guilt, but he had to try. "What do you see?"

Max's eye unfocused and began to water. He looked up, but not enough to reach Dexter's gaze in return, instead staring through his chest, and he felt just as hollow and empty as he must look to him.

"Do you take me for a fool, DAX?" Quiet and as close to angry as he'd heard since they'd been here.

No, not angry.

Betrayed.

He swallowed down the stinging lump at the back of his throat. He had to put on a brave face, had to keep his composure if he wanted Max to get better. That was the only thing he wanted, more than anything.

"Of course not, sir. Genuinely, what do you see?"

Max pulled his hand away and turned his body, his bandaged side facing Dexter. Shutting him out, pointedly. Dexter's empty hand curled into a fist, he was no better.

"Please, don't..." Max took a shallow, shuddering breath, and several beats before he spoke again, even quieter. "Don't ridicule me." Dexter could hear his breath catch, and he wanted nothing more than for this all to just stop.

"Sir, I didn't-"

"I've had enough of that." He shook his head stiffly, the action strange and wrong, like he had forgotten how. He stilled, his head turned even further away. "More than enough."

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #ZEX #Dexter Favin #And a drabble-fic under the cut #I ended up writing that the night after I read - I was a bit too inspired while busy so it's a little on the unfocused side haha #I would've cleaned it but I worry it wouldn't make it out of that stage! Please enjoy it for now <3 #This set is mostly periphery ideas - inspired by events rather than directly shown ♪ I suppose the first two kinda count tho #But they're more directly of the little scene I wrote ouò Poor ZEX </3 #And Dex! He's usually so capable! But he's stretching himself so thin ahh it's hard to watch in the best way #Of course he doesn't want to give ''Max'' over to just anyone - anyone at all really - both of their trusts have bottomed out #But how much could he reasonably care for him in that state? When he's still being actively haunted and most importantly - Not Max #He needs helps he needs support he needs to sleep and shower but a second with his eyes off Max and - then what? He'll immolate from fear #It's hard to imagine him crying but pushed to this extreme? To the thought of losing Max utterly and completely? Hhhhh #I do also just love him being possessive even outside of how terrible the situation is - he's always had his glimpses but this situation #Brings out the worst in him <3 In terrible ways #Really his method is just setting ''Max'' up nearby and prompting him over the sound of the shower like that's not nerve-wracking at all #Like he already doesn't answer half the time if that #As for the mini fic I was really interested in Dex's line about indulging ''Max's'' delusions #Apart from the fact that they're not delusions - not that anyone believes him outside of the Institute - what it means to indulge is weird #I saw one example of how to handle delusions that stuck with me - how not to deny them outright while also not reinforcing them #Since it's not actually helpful to be told ''That isn't Really happening to you'' when to you - to ZEX - it really is! How invalidating #And so rather to take the approach of ''I don't see/feel/hear what you are - I can't find any evidence of it myself'' and extrapolating #Dex taking the approach of ''What reality are you experiencing right now?'' and trying to build from there!#Unfortunately ZEX has already been treated like....well like all that - he's not in the mood for games even well-intentioned ones #He /knows/ he's in a human body. He can feel that and see that and understands that. It doesn't change who - what he /is/#The idea of a completely broken ZEX is so sad to me :( He's so strong and prideful and vivacious - Max really is another him </3 #It's not the same but he was saved from death! To fall into torture... But even despite that I want to see him succeed! As much as he can #Even in that small and shaking way I want to see him be hateful and spiteful - angry. Powerful <3 Fighting ♥

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ladyrijus · 9 months

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Thinking about how Link trembled before Mipha's statue in Breath of the Wild as he remembered who she was to him, and how his heart must have ached in Tears of the Kingdom when he saw her again in the beautiful court built in her name.

#he must have been FURIOUS seeing the sludge in the court #as well as /sidon/ of all zora having to clean it up #as if the disrespect towards mipha's memory wasn't enough #tloz #loz #legend of zelda #mipha #link #miphlink #<< can be taken as romantic or platonic #imo he cared about her a lot more than he let on #because even though he put all his energy into being a picture of strength for others #he still allowed mipha to heal his wounds #he still let her see him at his most vulnerable #when he could have just been “i'm fine” and pushed her away #also ignoring nuances canon literally describes him to have been the childhood friend of most if not all zora from mipha's generation #INCLUDING MIPHA #the fact they remember him so well is a testament to his character and how much he must have loved them #ANYWAYS. this post got carried away i'll stop here

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reineydraws · 3 months

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I’m fascinated with the op hockey au and ur art that goes with it and was wondering what would the marines be… like would they be refs or rules officials or judges? Like hardly anyone likes the marines and nobody likes rules officials/judges.

asking cause they’re a couple good marines (Koby, Rosinante and Belle Mere)

i mentioned this a little bit in this post but it boils down to them just being generally scattered around sports and sports-adjacent jobs.

i thought mb akainu would be a ref that screws over/directly causes ace injury during a whitebeards vs pirates game; garp works in media (not sports) but doesn't really like the notion that all his kids and grandkids are in pro sports lol; and koby & helmeppo are a rookie espn sports journalism duo (writer + cameraman) that interned at garp's media company for a while before changing to espn (garp was exasperated about it haha). but ye, the marines would be scattered as judges and rules officials and people on the olympics committee, etc etc.

i said nami would be a marketer or mb a sportscaster, so i think it'd be cute if belle-mère did something similar in her day, annndddd idk about cora. i made croc mihawk's manager but i have no idea what doffy would do and how cora would play into all that. would love to hear if anyone's got any ideas tho!

#op hockey au #rei replies #one piece #i wonder what smoker and tashigi would be too hm #maybe they're also hockey players but smoker just absolutely loathes the pirates for some reason #maybe for a stupid reason. i think it'd be funny if it was like that.#or maybe smoker is a referee but he's not corrupt or biased about it and he just finds the pirates antics annoying #bc some of their plays and the way they defend dont really make sense all the time but it's within the rules #so even tho smoker is kinda mad about it he'll have to throw up his arms and go 'I GUESS'#as he refuses to rule in a biased way like some of his other colleagues.#who knows #re: doffy maybe he's like. in the mafia. and cora's just out there trying to be in the sports world in a proper and clean capacity #and has to watch out for doffy trying to take advantage when it comes to stuff like the olympics. idk.

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mattodore · 3 months

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he's literally bald

#river dipping #matthias evanoff #echthroi #if you're wondering why i have him bald naked and standing on an empty lot rn #it's because i'm going to start over on his body scars using this projection painting method evan told me about #so i have to rip his sim with literally nothing on it #i have another version not pictured here where he also has zero skin details... he looks like mr. clean 😭😭😭#but i'm not sure which one i'm supposed to use?#i'm just trying to make his scars not like a skinblend of all his skin detail cc or anything #though i probably should do that for mattodore eventually #but i also know that when i use simripper to rip their sims some cc just doesn't show up anyway...#so. don't really know how to fix that lmao #but yeah........................................ he's literally bald #i imagine even with this new projection method i'm still gonna take days to make his scars

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phatcatphergus · 5 months

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It’s crazy that if tubbo showers it’ll be the first time Sunny has seen her father actually look healthy and clean

#she was adopted right after purgatory and it was not up from there #she doesn’t even know what he looks like under all the dirt and blood #what if she doesn’t recognize him when he’s cleaned up and actually positive #like when a dad shaves his beard and his baby doesn’t recognize who it is #qsmp tubbo #qsmp #tubbo #qsmp sunny

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lunaviathan · 1 year

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You ever think about the idea that Sonic, Shadow and Silver all might have impressively long quills for hedgehog mobians? Cus I do. Cus they all have reasons to. Sonic’s constantly tearing through solid metal and wires, the more buzzsaw like he can make himself the better and the more layers between him and sparking machinery while spindashing also all the better. Shadow’s a living weapon and part alien and he has the same reasons as Sonic to maintain them, also, his quills must be So Weird to other hedgehogs. Why are they so dark? I’ve never seen that stripe pattern in my life. How are they going up so much?? And so on. Silver. Silver dude guy. Post/mid-apocalypse extraordinaire (had to look up that word. why the hell is it spelled like that) Between his insane quills and the telekinesis, touching him if he doesn’t want you to is guaranteed pain. Someone get him some industrial scissors his quills don’t need to be that long anymore.

Imagine being a normal little hedgehog mobian. You’ve been living your life, having your quills carefully trimmed and blunted for your convenience and others’ safety, trying to find a nice balance between lengths so it looks nice without ruining the couch. the couch probably gets ruined anyway but it takes longer than if you were doing nothing. You kinda wish you could grow them out more cus other mobians with just fur do some pretty cool stuff. And one day your town gets overrun by robots by this human dude and you get saved by this blue mobian who you haven’t been able to get a good look at because he’s going So Fast and when he finally slows down you’re like. oh. neat I’ve been saved by a superspeed porcupine-wait no. why’s he look like. hedge hog??? Quills? Why????????? Are they so long what.

This guy has done the equivalent of growing up in a world of sewing needle hair and decided to grow them out to goddamn knife points. How has he not stabbed himself. what does his monthly spending on couches look like? And then two other guys show up. they also get mistaken for porcupines. they are also hedgehogs. What.

They all look cool as hell. plotting to ask them about their quill care routine is in your future. Maybe you’ll ask the pink one that just showed up. She seems like the most normal (wrong.) She might know how they do that.

#got possessed or smthn #anyway #sth #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #shadow the ultimate lifeform #silver the hedgehog #triple s #sonic headcanons #The fact that literally none of the main four hedgehogs except for maybe Amy can be considered reliable sources for what hedgehog mobians #normally look like drives me up the wall (positive) soooo much room for funky hcs #*definitely* none of them if you subscribe to the half echidna amy theory #I love thinking about sonic grooming his quills. he must do it super often to maintain the perfect balance of Shear Through Metal #and Not Debilitating In Every Other Situation #It's the best stim ever he does it each morning even if he doesn't have to #he's half the reason Tails' fur stays in such good shape cus every other day he drags Tails into it too each morning and cleans up his #fur too #there was a lot of trial and error when they were younger for Sonic to figure out how to groom long fur cus all of his is super short and #his quills are too stiff to tangle very easily #but now he'd got it down to a science #Tails can calculate how long it's been since he's seen Sonic on any given day by how unkept his fur is getting #it's not that he can't do it!! Sonic's just so good at it and it feels really nice #ohp got possessed again #gotta hit post before I keep going

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thedreadvampy · 5 months

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My housemate is moving out in January

She told us this a week or two ago, when she sat down and, after sitting with us watching TV for over an hour, said "hey so I bought a house and I'm moving out. We agreed on 2 months notice so I won't move until the end of January."

The last time she talked in the immediate terms about buying a house was in 2021, when the sale she was working on fell though and she was unemployed so it was a "when I'm back in a position to look I'll start looking again." Since then I've occasionally asked her how she's doing on the house buying front and she's been like "oh I'm getting there financially" but hasn't mentioned anything concrete.

She didn't tell us she was looking at places. She didn't tell us she had put in an offer. She told us when the offer was finalised. A week AFTER she emailed the letting agent about getting out of her part of the lease. And, it increasingly feels like, only because the letting agent's response was that we had to agree to change the lease.

The letting agent's response (which our housemate obviously didn't copy us into; we had to follow up separately and they copied us into the email chain) also includes that when we change the lease, they're empowered to change the rent, quote, "no cap". Rent was already going up in January - there's no possibility of Sam and I paying her share of the rent.

The really fucking upsetting thing is we're not strangers. This isn't a casual "housemate we found on flatshare" thing. She and Sam have lived together literally their entire adult lives. Me and her have known each other well over a decade. I lived in her and Sam's flat when I was homeless. We were the first people she came out to as trans. We're not super close but I thought we were fucking friends. And she's literally gone out of her way to not talk to us about this for what must have been months while the sale completed - which means she's lied to my face at least once cause I've asked her about her finances in that time (cause she's in a job she hates that she only took to get the house money, so it's like. when we've been commiserating about work stuff I'm often asking 'are you almost free?'). she literally went out of her way to talk to the letting agents before talking to us about putting us in a situation where we could lose our fucking home.

And she keeps. trying. to pretend nothing's happened. Every time I've seen her since then she's not mentioned anything or apologised or anything, she just keeps chatting away and offering hugs and fistbumps like nothing's happened. Like we're still fucking friends.

All it would take for us to still be friends and to be happy for her would have been one fucking sentence in the groupchat like "hey, just put an offer in on a house" or "I'm looking at properties, just so you know, that might happen in the next few months". Like nobody begrudges her for buying a house! It's very cool for her! She's 31 she's worked really hard to get the money I would love to be happy for her! Unfortunately she decided avoiding conflict is more important than giving the people she fucking LIVES WITH (who btw fronted her a month on the rent here while she was unemployed and agreed to take on a larger proportion of the move-in cost back in 2021, if we're still holding ourselves to shit we said 2.5 years ago), so no, you are not entitled to our friendship or to going back to normal.

like if she'd been honest with us it would have been something to process but we'd have had time to figure out our next steps. instead she's left us in a position where we have to find a new roommate before she gives her one month notice, which means finding someone by the end of December, which oh look that's the middle of the fucking Christmas holidays. and she didn't tell us anything until the START of December, or copy us into her conversation with the letting agent, meaning we still don't know what the rent on that space will be so we aren't yet in a position to advertise it. Has she offered to help find a roommate? Has she fuck. Has she offered to help out by moving her move-out date? Nah, she's moving as soon as she gets the keys because, quote, "that means her finances won't have to change". SOUNDS LOVELY. NOT HAVING YOUR FINANCES SUDDENLY CHANGE. I THINK THAT SOUNDS LIKE A REALLY REASONABLE FUCKING GOAL.

Thirteen fucking years she's lived with Sam. Four fucking weeks over Christmas she's left us to figure out a way to not turbofuck our living situation. And she's got the fucking nerve to try and pretend we should be interacting like nothing's changed. Jesus Christ. What a fucking unhinged way to treat...anybody, honestly. never mind the friends-your-entire-adult-life part. literally cannot imagine a scenario in which I would buy a house without telling the people I lived with.

(haha actually this is what my parents divorced over so apparently it's not unusual. although at least my dad had the decency to tell the woman he shared finances with at the point he put in an offer not the point the fucking sale went through.)

Like we'll be fine. It's a huge city centre flat with decent rent and queer housemates, hopefully even when the rent goes up it'll be an easy sell in a city with a huge housing shortage and big queer community. We've got a couple of people interested already, sight unseen - worst case scenario we have to live with someone we don't get on with. And it's given Sam and me a push to look at our own finances and as of today, we've got a mortgage decision in principle and can start looking at flats in the area - mind, we'll be transparent upfront and tell any prospective housemates that yeah, we're looking to buy and move out in the next 6-12 months, and we'll tell them if we put an offer in, because we're decent fucking people who aren't going to spring that on someone out of the blue.

But it's been I think 2 weeks and I'm so fucking angry I could spit. It's such a fucking betrayal. And frankly you know selfishly like. I just had a breakup a couple of months ago, I'm in the middle of moving jobs, both me and Sam have a history of housing instability and this has been the first decent, stable, safe, not-mouldy not-freezing home I think any of us have had, and this is so fucking triggering and upscuttling I could just start biting. like I was talking to my friend about it last week and it's just like. Can I have One Fucking Thing of the three main tentpoles of survival - home, work, relationships - that are fucking stable right now? because shit has been In Flux lately. and at least the work and relationship stuff has changed because of my decisions. going through all that work to make myself short-term unstable to gain long-term stability has been really hard and draining and then just as I was reaching the crisis point with work stuff BOOM, IT'S HOUSING INSTABILITY WITH A STEEL CHAIR. fuck. seriously fuck this and fuck her. we're going to make something good come of it but what a deeply, unbelievably shitty thing to do.