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elfboyeros · 1 year

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The Bridgehidien Ball

Find More Bridgehid Stuff Here

@lerenee @jj-pines @karaboutmyart

"What?"

"The Bridgehidien Ball," Georgia replied, across one of the circular cafeteria tables, "Are you going?"

"I don't know what that is," Rowan replied.

Georgia looked at them with wide eyes.

"You live with Indigo Bookstone freaking Corals, how do you not know?" the seer replied.

"Indigo isn't fond of social events," Maverick remarked, "and Indigo isn't—"

"Do not dis my woman, Ricky," Georgia growled.

"I'm still not being told what the Bridgehidien Ball is," Rowan retorted, looking at their new friends around the table as Georgia and Maverick began to argue.

"The ball is like an American prom," Elias commented, "It goes back to old tradition, the custom brings everyone together at the beginning of the new year, while also throwing a grand party for the lady Bridgehid."

"American prom," Rowan muttered, thinking of all the American teen movies they watched as a little kid.

"So, are you gonna go?" Georgia asked again, "It's this Friday, everyone is invited. Please say you're going."

"I..." Rowan thought for a moment, it would be fun spending time with Georgia, Maverick, Elias, and maybe even Nemo, "I don't have anything to wear."

"It isn't until Friday night," Georgia replied, "We can go out Friday morning and get you something to wear."

"That does sound like fun," Rowan said optimistically, before remembering that they would probably have to ask Indigo for permission.

The week went on quietly, ending on Thursday evening.

Rowan looked for Indigo in her home library. "Indigo?" Rowan questioned, trying to find her in the maze of bookshelves.

"Yes?" she responded, poking her head around one of the shelves.

"Could I go out with Georgia tomorrow?" Rowan asked, "...I wanna go to the Bridghidien Ball, but I don't have anything to wear, so she's gonna help me find something."

Indigo nodded, "You can go. Just be safe," she replied, as she continued to put a stack of books back on the shelf.

"Wow."

"Quoi?"

"I didn't expect that to go so smoothly," Rowan admitted, "I've been anxious about asking to go all week."

"You're sixteen, jellyfish," Indigo chuckled, "You're allowed to go places and have fun. Georgia, Elias, and Maverick are your friends, aren't they? If you want to hang out with them, you can. I just have to know where you are, or where you all are going, and as long as you're back by 22:30 at the latest, I am unbothered."

There was a slight pause, "Thanks," Rowan replied, "I think I'm still getting used to not being at Oceanside."

"I mean you've only been here for a month," Indigo added.

"Yeah," they sighed as they leaned against the closest bookshelf, "It's also weird to have friends."

"Having friends is... different," the mage agreed, "especially when they seem to pop up out of the thin air."

"I never thought I would like being around people this much."

Indigo smiled to herself, "It's like that," she began, "There are those certain people that you click with almost instantly. Those people you won't mind spending the rest of your days with, even though you hadn't wanted to before. Your mother said something like: "You'll find your people whether you like or not, and even if you didn't want to find your people in the first place," she told me that when I asked her to leave me alone when we first met."

Rowan smiled, "You make her seem like Georgia."

"In the way of making friends, she was like Georgia, although your mother wanted to befriend the kids that were not exactly the social type. Georgia however wants to befriend the world."

"Thank you," the teen remarked.

"For what?" Indigo asked in confusion, looking toward Rowan who was now standing away from the shelf.

"For letting me go out tomorrow," they answered, Indigo opened her mouth to reply but Rowan quickly interjected, "and for telling me about my mom."

The French mage closed her mouth for a moment before speaking, "Of course."

Georgia and Rowan agreed to meet at a little boutique in the center of town the next morning, an hour after the shop opened. The shops in the Marquisian town center had a European aesthetic, Rowan thought about the nation they stood in as they waited for their friend.

Marquis Island is an island in the North Sea, with a close relationship to its nearest neighbor, Denmark, and is of fair size, but not nearly as large as Great Britain and some of the other European countries. Though it is part of the EU it is a nation all its own. The nation actually only had two cities, if you can even call them that, one on the East and the other on the West (the west being the "capital" which its royalty and government are and the East where Bridgehid resides). It is sort of funny how the island is seen as a refuge, much of the country is a melting pot of -mostly- Europeans that have stories of leaving their old lives behind for something new, in the quiet whimsical land of fae, sorcerers, and magic.

"Rowan!" Georgia called loudly, snapping the young teen out of their thoughts, "Sorry I'm late. I was on the phone with my bebia, so I lost track of time."

"Bebia?" Rowan questioned.

"... It means grandmother in Georgian."

Rowan nodded, before following Georgia into the boutique. The pair greet the employees.

"Do you want something in pink, since it's your favorite color?" the seer asked as the two of them began to browse the racks of clothing, "You want something with a skirt or pants?"

"Since my hair is pink, I don't like wearing pink clothes," Rowan answered, "...I would rather not wear a dress."

"Alright, to the masculine section!" Georgia remarked with vigor.

The two friends spent a while in the shop perusing the men's section.

Georgia pulled many garments to get Rowan's opinion, which was mostly a shrug and a head tilt to the side. They came across a dull green suit jacket and high-waisted matching pants.

"Georgia," they verbalized, holding up the ensemble, "...What do you think about this?"

"This is really cute!" she proclaimed, "You just need an undershirt."

Rowan nodded in agreement, before wandering around the store a little while longer. They went with Georgia while she went into the feminine section.

Georgia was looking for a dress that was formal enough for the ball but fitting with her personality. While she found a light orange gown with flower detailing on the sleeves, bodice, and hem, Rowan found a lace undershirt.

Happy with the clothes the both of them had picked, they decided to pick a few accessories.

Rowan grabbed a pair of shoes before paying for their items.

Afterwards the two stopped at a café after having a late lunch together, then they both headed to Indigo and Calvin's place to get ready for the night ahead.

"I'm back!" Rowan shouted, taking off their shoes at the door and slipping on some home slippers.

"Is Georgia with you?" Indigo called, from the kitchen.

"Yeah!" Rowan declared, looking over at their friend who had those magical stairs in her eyes, like she had in magic class, clearly marveling at the home she was in.

"Did you two have a nice day out?" the Frenchwoman asked while walking out of the kitchen and into the living room. She was dressed in a robe with her hair wrapped up in a towel.

Rowan started heading towards their room with Georgia following slowly behind.

"Yeah, I was surprised that I found stuff I like," the teen answered, motioning to the shopping bag in their hand.

"Merveilleux!" Indigo remarked, turning her gaze to Georgia who was still in awe of the mage's home.

"Your home is beautiful," Georgia complimented.

The mage professor smiled, which was basically a shot in Georgia's heart, it was very obvious who Georgia looked up to.

"We should go get ready if we want to meet Elias to take pictures together," Rowan remarked, as the Georgian seer was still in admiration of the woman in front of her.

"Right," she squeaked out, following Rowan down the hallway to their room with a skip in her step.

"Okay!" Georgia uttered in a confident stance turning from the pile of items on Rowan's bed, "No makeup, light makeup, a lot of makeup?"

"Uhm... light makeup," Rowan replied, sitting in their desk chair.

The teen artist pulled out a few pallets and cosmetic bags sitting them on the desk before beginning to work, "I never thought I would be in Indigo's house, like ever," Georgia commented, with a soft smile.

"You look up to her," Rowan stated.

Georgia nodded, "My family moved here when I was little, and there was a day the whole family went on a shopping trip in the town square," she explained, "And of course because I was little, I got lost. I touched some random guy by accident and -because I'm a seer- I froze. I saw stuff I didn't need or want to see. And of course, the guy I touched wasn't genuinely nice. Just imagine little Georgia in the town square being stared down by a large ass man with a really mean look on his face. He was about to punch me, a literal child. Then she popped up out of nowhere – Can you close your eyes, please?

Rowan stayed silent, wishing for the girl putting the pigment on their eyelid to continue, "She was this goddess-like being in my child brain, this woman that appeared from the heavens to save a small Georgian child," she continued while continuing to do the pink haired teen's make-up, "...And then seeing her in action! Her talents go beyond controlling the elements, obviously, but Indigo punches and kicks grown men in the face. When it was over, I was awe-struck, and couldn't stop thinking of the mage with the turquoise & lavender hair, and her handsome knight with the épée. Just because they were so cool!"

"Do Indigo and Calvin remember you?" Rowan asked curiously.

"Calvin doesn't, he only knows me as Maverick's friend and my older sibling's little sister," the seer answered, "Indigo does, I've been trying to become her apprentice for the past year!"

"She won't let you?"

"...Not through the college, if I would have become her apprentice – open your lips a little. I could have gotten into some of the college classes early, but every time I've asked, her answer was always no. Now that I'm actually at the college, I haven't gotten the chance to ask her."

"Maybe the answer will be different," Rowan commented, hopeful for their friend.

"Me too. Okay I'm done, look!"

Rowan looked in the mirror that sat on their desk, seeing the light and natural make-up upon their face, "I like it," they commented.

"Yay!" Georgia exclaimed, and started going to grab her gown, accessories, and make-up bag, "I'm gonna get ready in the bathroom, then we can go meet up with Elias."

Rowan nodded while continuing to stare at themselves in their little desk mirror as the Georgian seer left the room, only to start pulling their items out of their shopping bags a few moments later.

They took out their braids, after putting on the lace shirt, dull green slacks, and suit jacket. Layering two belts on their waist, and slipping on their new dark dress shoes, they were satisfied. Well, satisfied after just slicking back their hair to get it out of their face.

"What do you think?" Georgia asked, reentering the room, and spinning around in her peach-colored gown with the flower details. Her face was covered in orange, yellow, and gold make-up, "You look great!"

"You look really cute," Rowan complimented.

"Alright, let's go meet Elias!" Georgia declared, before the pair left the bedroom.

"Oh hi, Mr. Bookstone," she remarked as she saw Calvin walking down the other side of the hallway, heading to his bedroom.

"Don't call me that," Calvin chuckled, waving, "You two look nice."

The two of them thanked him as they passed each other.

"Be safe and have fun tonight!" Calvin encouraged as the teens left for the front door.

The two of them met up with Elias on the college campus and aided the photographer in one of his favorite pastimes before entering one of the great halls for merrymaking. They met up with Maverick in the process.

The rounded ivory walls and marble brown floors, the room is full of many people in ornate gowns and suits. Everyone was pleasantly enjoying themselves with the food and drink provided.

Maverick seemed to be looking for Nemo.

"Nemo is..." Elias searched the sea of people before seeing the ravenette speaking to his tutor, "over there, Mave."

Maverick nodded, waving to his friends before linking up with his boyfriend, as Nemo and Sloan (along with Casper, because he and Sloan are never separated) went their separate ways.

"Woah!" Georgia exclaimed as her eyes locked on Indigo and Calvin when they walked into the ballroom.

Indigo wore an emerald gown; her hair was worn up messily. Calvin was in all black from his shoes to his open front shirt.

"...I wonder how he got that scar," Elias muttered, calling attention to the large scar on Calvin's chest that happened to be on full display, to which Georgia and Rowan shrugged.

"Am I going to get a dance out of you tonight, love?" Sloan inquired, catching Indigo's attention as she stepped aside to talk to others in the ballroom.

"Possibly, dear, but not at the moment," Indigo countered.

"What about me?" Casper asked with his hands, which made the mage smile.

"Of course, lead the way!" she responded before he took her hand and began to lead her to the dance floor.

"I'm stealing your husband," she mouthed jokingly to Sloan, before being led away.

"Do you want to dance with me, Sloan?" Calvin asked.

"I would rather not," the alchemist professor sighed into his drink, "Plus, you and I have nothing to discuss."

"Fair enough," Calvin chuckled.

The night was full of life, full of dancing, adults drinking, having fun with friends, and eating small finger foods.

While Georgia was off speaking to some of her friends from the art club, and Maverick and Nemo were dancing, Elias and Rowan were off to the side.

Rowan was trying to catch their breath from all the dancing with Georgia, and Elias was looking through his camera.

"Uh... hey," he uttered, catching Rowan's attention, "y-you look really nice."

"Thanks," they spoke with a kind smile. They stared at him trying to take in his appearance: dressed androgynously in cream and white. His outfit was formal, yet simple, with his pearl necklace around his neck, "You look really nice too."

Elias blushed at their compliment before something caught his eye.

"Huh, I wonder what Percy is marching towards," he observed, watching their biology professor move across the ballroom floor.

"I have no idea," Rowan replied, "She looks pissed."

"She always looks pissed," he commented.

Percy stopped beside Indigo, who was on her own for the moment sipping on alcohol, "Corals, we need to talk."

"Ah, hello Percival, how is the year going for you?" Indigo asked, giving Percy a small glance, "You look very nice."

"Your ward shouldn't be in my class!" Percy declared, after rolling her eyes at the mage.

"Why?"

"They are too smart for my class, Indigo!"

Indigo sat her empty glass on a nearby table before turning to Percy, "Aren't you the one that always says that you don't care why students take your classes? And you also often state that your Biology 130 class is the easiest class a student will ever take here."

Percy opened and closed their mouth, "That's not my point. You have seen your ward's testing scores, just like I have. They should be in more high-level classes, so they could be challenged while being educated. ...They already know what I am teaching!"

"I see that being easier on you, you know their work will be perfect every time," Indigo retorted, clearly done with the conversation.

"Your ward—"

"Their name is Rowan," Indigo pronounced with narrow eyes.

"Rowan should be in my organic chemistry class," Percy offered.

"They don't like organic chemistry, they tried taking it before graduating primary school, they barely passed," the mage informed.

"That exactly my point, I—"

"Then talk to Rowan about it," Indigo sighed, making eye contact with Percy.

"You already have, and they said no, and you want me to make them do it," Percy gave a small nod in agreement, "Look, Percival, I have too much to worry about right now, I'm not going to make Rowan do something they don't want to do. Really, if I had things my way, they wouldn't even be here. But here we are, so I'm letting them do as they please."

Indigo looked out at the dance floor.

Georgia and Elias had an impromptu dancing session while Rowan and Maverick watched laughing (Nemo was watching his brother too, although he was not laughing, but smiling slightly).

"And right now, that's what they should be focused on," she ended her remarks with a soft smile.

"When did you become motherly?" Percy scoffed.

"Why are you still so rude?" Indigo retorted with a smirk.

Percy had a retort in the chamber but didn't get to say it as Calvin approached.

"Do you mind if I steal Indigo away for a moment?" he asked politely.

"She's your wife, do whatever you want," Percy scoffed, "We were done."

"Have a nice night, Percival," Indigo said as Calvin began to lead her away by hand.

"You look very nice, by the way, Percy," Calvin called, with his signature smile.

He led her out to the balcony of the dance hall, the night sky a shade of dark blue, the full moon shining on the garden, full of winter plants in full bloom below.

"It's been a while since we've been out here," Indigo commented.

"Seven years," Calvin replied.

"Goddess, we've been married for seven years," she sighed as Calvin turned to face her, "and I did nothing for our anniversary, I'm sorry."

The healer smiled, tucking her hair behind her ear, "It's alright."

"Non, it's not—"

"Indigo, you're enough," he said abruptly, but softly, "We've been busy, it's alright, you're always enough."

She sighed, rubbing her face, "...I feel like I'm falling apart," she admitted.

"I'll catch you, don't worry," Calvin pulled her close to him. Her new height, thanks to her heels, allowed her face to fit perfectly in the crook of his neck, "Dance with me?"

"Of course."

Back in the ballroom Rowan was still enjoying the company of friends.

Until a man with mint hair, covered in scars, and one golden eye loomed, dressed in a satin metallic green dress shirt and a pair of slacks approached them.

"Rowan King?" he asked, his voice was an odd "normal" compared to his appearance.

"That's me," Rowan responded.

The man stared at them. Their friends looked at him, seeming intrigued.

"Come with me for a moment," the man said firmly.

Rowan looked around the ballroom attempting to find Indigo or Calvin, to no avail, before nodding and following the man to wherever he wanted them to go.

"Who was that?" Georgia asked her friends.

Elias shrugged.

"It looks like the guy that hangs around Duke," Nemo answered.

"The Necromancer," Maverick sighed.

The mint haired man led Rowan to Duke, who had hidden himself in the hall around a group of people all laughing and interacting with one another like the highest of aristocrats.

"Ah, thank you, Neon," Duke thanked, making eye contact with the man Rowan had followed.

Neon passed Duke to sulk in the group of people who were in a corner.

"Hello, Rowan. How have your studies been going?"

"Good," Rowan replied, now being stared at by a group of my ten or so adults, who had stopped loudly snickering with each other and begun speaking in whispers.

"I assume you are having fun tonight."

Rowan nodded, feeling extremely uncomfortable from all the eyes on them.

"I'm surprised Indigo is letting you be so free," Duke commented, "although I assume she doesn't keep an eye on you for long."

There was something about his tone when mentioning Indigo, it was clear he's not a fan, even though he is the one who brought her up.

"Indigo and Calvin treat me almost like an adult, they give me a curfew and keep track of my whereabouts, but I am allowed to be a normal teenager," Rowan commented, hoping that their reply would not continue the conversation for an extended period.

"It shocks me, she hasn't locked you away like she threatened," he scoffed into the glass of whatever he was drinking.

"Pardon?"

"After your mother died," Duke let out a laugh, "Indigo and I got into many arguments, all about your well-being, because simply, Esma was gone."

His flippant way of talking about the deceased huntress, when she's only been spoken about with admiration, is jarring.

"I remember Indigo once said that she was going to keep you away from me, far away actually," he added, "and yet here you are."

Rowan said nothing as the headmaster continued to speak, "She and Sloan think I killed Esma, you know."

"Killed?" Rowan asked quietly.

"And it wouldn't be shocking if they think I caused your father's mysterious illness... which I didn't."

"My... father..."

"Oh, do you not know Jacob?" Duke asked with this smirk that seemed unnatural, and with such an offhanded tone, that clearly showed he had no respect from anyone but himself if that.

Rowan froze.

"Indigo and Sloan should know just because it happens in my college doesn't mean I am the reason it happened, even if it is the death of loved ones," Duke continued, "I hope the best for you, I really do, and I also hope that you didn't inherit your father's weak immune system. Despite what everyone says, you look just like your father, not your mother."

The words were so insignificant, but why didn't Rowan remember their father, this Jacob, who was he? What illness did he have? And Esma! Sloan and Indigo thought she was murdered by Duke. Was this the college negligence Sloan was talking about? What the hell was going on?!

"Let's hope you'll even live longer than they did," was the last thing they remembered him saying, before Rowan disassociated and walked away from him.

"Rowan! Rowan! Are you okay?" Sloan asked in great concern, grabbing their shoulders.

They were no longer standing in front of Duke and his group of his corner people, but now in the middle of the ballroom, seeming dazed and zombie-like, tears perched on their waterline.

"I need... I need Indigo," was all they could muster.

Sloan looked over at Percy, who he had been talking to before he spotted Rowan in the middle of the dance hall.

"I think Calvin took her out to the balcony," the biology professor replied, a hint of worry in her voice.

Rowan followed them out to the terrace, catching Indigo and Calvin mid-kiss before the waterworks started and they broke down.

"Indigo!" they cried, snapping Indigo and Calvin out their romantic gaze.

"Goddess, Rowan, what's wrong?" Indigo asked, rushing over to them.

"Du-Du-Duke talked about my mom," they heaved, hot tears streaming down their face, "He-he-he said you a-an-an-and Sloan think he murdered her."

Indigo was becoming irate, "He mentioned my dad, and he—"

"Bastard," the mage scoffed, before letting go of their arms and marching back into the room.

Rowan couldn't hold themself up in their current state, thankfully, Calvin was present to catch them.

"Woah, woah, woah, I gotcha you kid," he remarked catching them mid-fall, "I've got you."

Indigo's dark colored heels loudly clicked against the marble floor as she stomped her way over to Duke.

She found him in his corner with all his "followers" around him in a circle as he stood in the middle. She pushed her way through all of the people and smacked the smug dean in the face.

"YOU INSENSITIVE BASTARD!"

"Good eveni—"

"YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BRING UP JACOB!" she screamed, pushing her finger in his chest, "You've been cursing Esma's name for years, and despite our better judgment Sloan and I have let you, but bringing Jacob into this melodrama when he has nothing to do with it is a low blow. You only did it to get under my skin and make an orphan cry!"

"Angel, let's go," Calvin called, Rowan in his arms. Georgia, Elias, and Maverick running up to him to see what was wrong.

"Is Rowan, okay?" Georgia asked.

"Is there anything we can do?" Maverick questioned.

The healer didn't reply, as everyone continued to listen to Indigo rant loudly.

"I don't just think you are a murderer; I know you are! You hide behind falsehoods to disguise whatever the hell you are actually doing. You are ruining the lives of those that have the displeasure of being in the same room as you."

"And you!" she turned her rage toward that mint haired man that led Rowan to him in the first place, "You just enjoy watching other people's suffering! Is this your revenge? For surpassing you? You old parasitic fu—"

"INDIGO!" Calvin yelled; his voice so loud that it bounced off the walls. He sounded angry, but not at her, no, he was mad at the situation.

Indigo's mouth shut as soon as he screamed her name.

She stared at Duke with so much wrath and heat, while he stood there with a small smirk on his face, his left cheek bright red.

She turned on her heels, and left following her husband, feeling defeated, like she had just lost some game that she didn't know she was playing in the first place.

"What do you think happened?" Georgia asked her male friends as they sat on the college dorm backsteps under the night sky.

After leaving the event not too long after the mage professor, her husband and their friend took leave.

Nemo, a few steps below her, blue smoke from a vape pen he wasn't supposed to have, before sighing, "Indigo mentioned Sloan and they both don't like Duke, so maybe she finally just snapped?"

"Even Calvin was mad," Maverick added, sitting beside the alchemist in training, hugging his legs, "so it has to be deeper than just Indigo not liking Duke."

Elias shrugged beside the young seer, looking up at the stars, "I just hope Rowan is okay."

Georgia, Maverick, and even Nemo all nodded.

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unfocused-always · 10 months

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Chapter VIII: A Quick Guide to Ruining Your Life and Other Bad Decisions

Summary: Misaki makes a deal with the devil??

A/N: Nope, you're not free from me yet. Also for the *I do love French language.

Golden light poured through pointed windows cascading over heavy wooden shelves like a soft blanket. It was nearing eight p.m., and the sun was slowly hiding behind the horizon. That and the barely visible letters on the page finally convinced Misaki to give up the fight and turn on the light.

The library at Sakamaki's house was, unsurprisingly, enormous. Bookshelves lined the walls and occupied most of the remaining space, leaving only a reading nook unoccupied. At least, it was like that before she barged in a few hours earlier with a bucket of coffee, painkillers, and a goal at hand.

If last week was a person, he'd no doubt fail students for fun and kick innocent puppies off the stairs. She winced at the mental image. Although the comparison was pretty close. I don't know who you are. Those words have repeatedly played in her head since she woke up from near-comatose sleep. Stop. Each sentence felt like a punch in the gut. Don't contact us again.

Her dad, the dad she knew, would never turn his back on an innocent person begging for help. But then again, in their eyes, she was a stupid teen playing a cruel prank. She pressed her forehead against a cool glass, hoping it would bring her answers. What happened when I was away? How could they forget me so quickly?

"Bitch-chan!"

She thumbed the pages. This situation, albeit bizarre, had to have an explanation. And everything in her was telling her it was indeed supernatural.

"Bitch-chan~" Hot breath washed over her neck. "You'll hurt my feelings if you ignore me like that."

"Why do you keep doing that?!" She demanded, almost falling off the chair in the process.

Laito smiled a little too smugly for her liking. "Hm, but I've been calling out to you this whole time! It's rude to ignore someone like that, you know."

Anxiety clawed up her back. She could feel every spot on her body crying in agony, and that was after a heavy dose of painkillers. Pissing him off now- Nope, we are not going there.

"Sorry," she managed, suppressing a shiver in her voice. "I was just thinking."

"Thinking, huh?" She could tell from his tone alone he didn't buy it for a second. "And what thoughts absorbed you so completely? I wanna hear every ~ single ~ detail."

"I've been trying to make sense of this," she pointed at the library catalog, "but how you found anything here is beyond me. Why are half of the books here in Latin?"

He leaned in, resting his head on his palm. "It's fitting, don't you think? Dead language for dead creatures."

The incredulous look on her face must have told him everything, as his laugh almost muted her following words. "You guys speak Latin? Just like that?"

"On ne sait jamais~"

She leaned back in her chair, almost asking him to repeat that. "Oh no, no, no," she shook her head. "That, my dear dead creature, is French. I'd recognize that cheese-choking accent anywhere."*

"Aah, you've got me this time, Bitch-chan." His eyes narrowed on her, and her stomach sunk, hoping to shrink into itself. "Say, how will you punish me?"

She was legally obliged to do a double-take at that. He couldn't be serious, right? "Punish you?" She stammered.

"Of course. After all, I did try to deceive you, didn't I?"

She knew he was plotting something with the way his mouth quirked up. Even though he was babbling about his punishment, there was no doubt in her heart that it would be her spot if she didn't play her cards right. If only it was so simple.

"I suppose the 'I'll let it slide this time' is not an option?" She asked, crossing one leg over the other.

"Hm~ You know, if you don't teach me a lesson, I might just keep up the deception. Do you really want that?"

Hell would freeze over before he stopped lying. Chipped in the logical part of her brain. But it didn't mean she couldn't use the situation to at least try to play something for herself.

"Right," she started, adjusting her pose to mirror a proper negotiator's. "As your punishment, I want you to tell me everything you know on memory enhancements, or however you call it."

"Aah, Bitch-chan," his pained moan made her hair raise up. "That's not how you do it at all!"

"No," she cleared her throat, shifting in place. "You told me to pick a punishment, and I did."

"But your punishment is boring~" like a puppet on a string, he leaned closer, almost invading her space. "Wouldn't you prefer something more... exciting?"

His voice dropped dangerously low, and panic shot through her. She hadn't allowed herself to unpack all that went down between them, fearful of the things this would force her to admit. She was prepared to chalk it up to exhaustion and basic survival instinct, even if denial killed her. But as his eyes dropped heavy and long fingers slowly trailed up her arms, she had to force herself not to flinch.

"The punishment," she started, praying for her voice not to betray her. "It was supposed to be your punishment, not mine."

He hummed, his fingertip ghosting along her vein. "You're awfully determined to interrogate me, Bitch-chan. Could it be that you still haven't said goodbye to your family?" The innocent look on his face was almost enough to convince her it was a genuine slip-up. Almost. She'd long since learned hardly anything was accidental with him. "Whoopsie, I wasn't supposed to say that."

It was apparent he knew something. Now the question remained how she could get her hands on that information. Hardly paying it any mind, she caught his wandering hand and placed it palm up on the table, temporarily keeping the fingers confined. "Look," she started, somehow maintaining eye contact. "it's evident that a. you know that something happened to my parents," she began, straightening his index finger. "b. you're aware it has something in common with memory manipulation," she accused, dabbing his middle finger into the table. "and c. you're clearly dodging the question," his ring finger went down with all the conviction she could muster. He, however, remained unbothered.

"Hm~ Funny, because the way I see it-," he all but purred, his outstretched fingers slowly gliding up her forearm. A slight tremor went through her, and she could have sworn he counted it as a victory. "You're clearly so desperate for any explanation of what happened to your beloved family. Aah, aah," she opened her mouth to protest, and he raised his finger to silence her. "my turn now. I could share it with you, but..."

She knew what he would say far before he grabbed under the chair and dragged her closer, forcing her legs to spread over the edges. His rich scent washed over her, bringing back memories of the first time they were in a similar position. Back then, she didn't know she should run for the hills. Back then, things were easier. Back then, it was all lies. Blood wooshed in her ears as he leaned closer, slowly bringing her fingers to his mouth.

"Everything has a price, Bitch-chan. I wonder how much are you willing to pay?"

He was testing her. It was a bait, a trap so well-marked only an absolute fool would fall for it. Yet, she didn't have many options left. For all she hated it, he was the one with answers. He knew why her family had forgotten her and maybe even how to bring them back. But information like that didn't come cheap. Her teeth sunk into her bottom lip so hard she almost tasted blood. The next words tasted like ash. "What do you want me to do?"

His grin was equally charming as it was absolutely horrifying. "Excellent answer," he murmured into her palm, and she felt his tongue sneak between her fingers.

Suddenly she understood what selling her soul must feel like.

***

This, protested her brain, is absolute madness.

Misaki stifled a scream. She knew. She knew why she was doing this , yet it hardly made it any easier. Pacing back and forth before her door, she attempted to regain any semblance of control over her mind.

The clock struck twelve. That's it, she thought. This is how it ends.

Dressed in the most covering cream turtleneck and thick black jeans that didn't have a single smallest hole in them, she still felt it wasn't enough layers. She threw on her loose jacket, and even though she was sweating like hell already, she vowed to keep it on at all times. With that, her armor was complete, and she yanked her door open, heading with purposeful steps toward his room.

It was one thing pacing in her room. But standing in front of the dark wood, her situation suddenly seemed ten times more real. It was cruel of him. Telling her to come to his room almost four hours later, he gave it just enough time for paranoia and crippling anxiety to take root. Still, she swallowed her fear and knocked.

The door opened almost immediately, revealing Laito leaning on the frame with the most shit-eating grin she'd ever seen. His lack of clothes made her winter outfit almost laughable. Clad in a barely-buttoned white shirt and comfortable pants, he seemed utterly at ease, like this mess was his typical midnight entertainment. It probably was, she thought bitterly.

"Bitch-chan," he peeled himself from the wall and offered her a hand. "With a look like that, I could think you're trying to seduce me."

"In your dreams," she grabbed his hand and dragged him inside, kicking the door shut behind them.

[Chapter VII] [Masterlist] [Chapter IX]

#diabolik lovers #sakamaki brothers #laito sakamaki #diabolik lovers laito #fanfic #oc #reader #misaki #vampire #anew #the mostquestionable life choices #kids don't try this at home

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bishh-kanya · 2 years

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Portals - sci - fi x romance

Only because my mutuals wanna read it , it's a failed wattpad story 💀 so ignore if ya don't like it ! I wrote this when i was 14 and it's unfinished, this post has two episodes .

Episode 1:

Everything in this world exists if you have the power to believe , you want something , you claim it subconsciously and to claim anything , you must imagine but doesn’t imagination solely depend upon the acclaims of our vision , we take parts by parts and turn it into a bigger picture well , think about it. As I move out of my house I see hriday standing across the road ,he waves his hand at me and I slowely shake my hand, for over more than a year , he has been my constant support when it comes to discussing my ideas we knew each other since we were children but he was so damn mean I don’t know what happened to him suddenly , he was such a dork he almost scratched my face in the 9 th grade . Our van arrives and meanwhile I cross the road and we hop into it ,

"so, are you going to the field trip next month" says he

" who calls it a field trip , crooked 900 shit"

" oh come on we would have fun".

." lets see"

Today is 8th of july, oh nothing significant but my stupid history test , well to me I really like to live in the present, the past sounds insignificant to me , what will you do by knowing who started the french revolution, why not focus on what led to this absolute well obsolete turmoil , well never mind this sceneries outside my van window make me feel more alive.

Well our school is absolutely the best in our area but I hate it !! I hate education, the ones given in our schools without the sole foundation to know what we actually want to learn .

As I screen through the room, I can see aarti sitting on the first bench, though my context felt like I was an absolute hater of education but I love aarti she has been through my thick and thins , she is so studious , it almost pains in my adams apple ,huh silly me I don’t have one, it seems like some protrusion on the skin of my neck.

Well I get my sheets and I write my paper successfully and I expect as average as it is always .

As I walk through the hallway I meet the actual mean girl , who is my friend despite I am still sometimes confused about us Reena Roy , is the actual beauty queen and the dumbest brain of rosevally ,I mean not dumb , at times I have no control over what I say so she is a little more average than I am , me calling her dumb actually messed it up right.

" tonight at the community park at 9 "

I nod my head and leave

Episode 2:

A week left for the field trip and I am still confused , I definitely want to go to the amusement park, its awesome their but I also want to stay with myself and read some therapy books and articles I am totally done with my life , I don’t understand the point of living anymore when I have no goals this become worse when your mother is absolutely toxic, I have always admired those western mother daughter relationships , where they actually love each other , I wonder how is that possible that human beings despite having so many things in common still manage to be different sometimes I am so jealous of the people with perfect families , great friends and the ones with proper life goals , mostly I am jealous of the people with the third category, no matter how bad my life would have been, if I really had something to live and thrive for I really woudnt be so saddned but here I am, nothing, I have serious anger issues I don’t know what I speak when I am angry, people always say have satisfaction in your life, well I don’t have a thing called it and I don’t think its something which is really necessary for me atleast for me desiring things is really important, if you don’t desire something in your life , what is the point of living a life .

To all those people who said satisfaction was necessary, FUCK OFF!!!!

Meanwhile as I go on reflecting on my life , there is a knock at my door I am so tired I don’t want to see who it is but I have to, and I see praveen, well I am really proud of him, he goes by they/them and he is the best , we just live nearby in our neighborhood and sometimes he comes along to do homework together, he tells me about his love interests and its fun listening to him , I suddenly get filled with so much warmth and happiness

" arent you coming to the field trip?"

" I necessarily don’t feel like it"

"oh come on today is the last date for registration , you are coming , no questions"

" Manvik needs help in his science project so I will stay"

" come on no, when did you start helping that jerk , don't you remember he used to bully us ?"

" okay honestly I need some time alone "

" sweetie take care, I am extremely sorry ,I gotta go shopping with my mom, she will kill me if I am late ttyl, I will call you in the evening "

" bye"

Maybe I should just take a shower or maybe I should go outside I don’t know what to do I am so devastated , I keep asking myself why am I so devastated , but I have no answers , I am just tired of hearing "no" why is this prominent I always wanted to be happy, I wonder why am I not last year I was declined for a mental treatment, just on the basis of our society at my lowest points I have this fantasy that I want to drown in the ocean how eternally blissful and how scary because I don’t know how to swim .

Obviously I aint goin , maybe binging riverdale is better

" not today yaa I got a great deal of homework"

" very well, bye"

"Bye"

This feels so immature 💀 , now mutuals you gotta deal with it ,

Tagging some :

@a-really-hot-caterpillar , @kaurava-apologist , @budugu , @young-potato-stuff , @lazydreamer19

Tell me if you wanna be tagged 💚

Deal with it 😛

#random story #fan fics #sad writing #desiblr #desi tag

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i-dont-write-as-often-as-id-like · 1 year

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The French Resistance, Chapter 1

Monday, March 6th, Paris, France.

"I am not a resistance spy." I said with a calm voice, as if a gun was not pointed at my head. I simply sat there not showing my discomfort. "I have no reason to help such people. The Reich has done nothing but help my family sir, why would I help destroy it?" I tilted my head a bit, annoyed.

"We've seen you talking with men we believe to be a part of the resistance; you speak fluent French as well." The officer said with disdain, I just laughed and shook my head, raising an eyebrow.

"Old Raoul, a resistance member- Hah! That old man can barely walk anymore, how is he going to fight against the Reich? He's an old family friend, he's been all for the Reich since before the war! Don't be foolish officer, Old Raoul would never do such a thing. Now his daughter, Miss Simonne Batteux, is the one you should be worried about officer. I haven't got much evidence, but she very much so is a French nationalist." I explained, leaning back in the chair. "Her husband Mr. Louis Batteux is as untrustworthy as the French get, he's unemployed, French nationalist, born to a family of French nationalists, and his parents have both been tried and sentenced as resistance members." The officer nodded, writing the information down. I sat with my legs crossed and waited for the next thing he would say.

"You are positive that Raoul Crozier is not a resistance member?"

"Very."

"Understood, you may leave." He waved me off and I stood up and left, dusting myself off. I didn't truly care what happened to the old man, but I saw no reason to lie to the officer. It would have been foolish to do so. Even if I was a resistance member I wouldn't have lied. Of course, I have my secrets, but I'm not a liar, little half-truths are not lies.

"So how did the meeting go with Officer Heilmann? Everyone knows he's trigger happy." I shrugged, making a small hand gesture to say 'so-so' "You're alive, so I think it went better than 'So-So"

"I still had a gun held to my head that entire meeting though, alive, or not it was uncomfortable. Lesson learned; Officer Heilmann thought an old man who uses a cane was a resistance member! Old Raoul Crozier of all people! He's just a stupid old man. I don't even know if he can see anything, he's as blind as a bat!" I laughed, my good friend slapping my shoulder.

"Pfft, that's hilarious, let me guess, he was questioning you because you were talking to him the other day?"

"Yeah, old Raoul of all the men to get me questioned." We laughed together about the situation. I could feel my face flush as he held my arm, grinning. It was unfair that he could just make me blush like it's nothing. "Hey, wanna go to a restaurant today? My good buddy opened a place not too far away, and it's not French, his parents make real beer, not this French shit."

"Sounds great, you always know the best places Goldblatt, I'm glad you used to live here."

"Used to? Buddy we're living here now!" I pulled him out of the building and onto the rough, beaten streets. Around us was men and women rebuilding some places that had been broken during the invasion, we ignored such people, as members of the Reich we were not to speak to those 'bellow us' in their eyes. I just held my head high as I was supposed to, stepping over the rubble. I ignored the eyes staring at us, their opinions don't matter. I smacked his hand "stop sweating, you look suspicious." I whispered through my teeth, my heart slamming in my ears "come on look the part Buchtel!" He quickly straightened himself, holding his head up. I swallowed my anxiety as we stepped inside the small bar. "Ah! Magnus! My good friend!" I cheered, walking over to him, hugging him close.

"My good friend, I'm so happy to see you again!"

"Same to you Ian, been a while! Glad to see you here. Would you like your regular seat in the back?"

"Of course, Magnus." I smiled as he led the two of us to the back, to our private table; two glasses of beer already laid out. "You're a good man, thank you." I raised the glass to him, tipping my head in thanks, as did Buchtel.

"Your friends will be here soon, on schedule as usual" He hummed, pouring three glasses of French wine "And I have the best prepared for such guests, of course. You two are brave men." As he said that three of my dear friends walked in, tipping their hats to him. "Ah, welcome, I have your wine already ready. I will leave so you five can discuss business." He said calmly before walking out of the room, whistling his cheery show tune. I turned to the other four.

"So, as much as I would love to sit, drink and chat with you three, you didn't ask us to meet here for no reason, did you?" The lady shook her head "So what's up Moineau? Why have you called us here?"

"We were informed that suspicions were rising against you and Buchtel. We can offer you to officially join the resistance, we can protect you better than we can now. I promise." I only chuckled and sipped my beer. "I know, I am aware that it could make things worse, and we would be losing a supplier, but the allies are approaching fast. We have hopes that once they get here there won't be a need for suppliers like you, Goldblatt; and Buchtel, you would be nice to have around, you know a lot about their tactics, as you are a military advisor." I could see him think about the offer, glancing over to me with questioning eyes.

"I will have to think about it Moineau, call me when the allies step foot in France and I will give you your answer."

"That is only three months away, Goldblatt. We have been talking with them as of late. June 6th is your deadline."

"I understand. I will have my answer by then." Moineau sighed and looked to Buchtel, who looked as unsure as a deer trying to cross the road. "Buchtel, don't look at me, it isn't my job to choose for you. Though I think it would be good for you, you are... Awful at trying to be a proper soldier." I saw his shoulders slump as he took off his cap and studied it, looking pathetic as he visibly pondered the idea.

"I accept your offer Moineau, I will become a proper member of the resistance." He sat the cap on the table and held out his hand for a handshake. She shook his hand, smiling.

"Thank you Buchtel, I suppose it would be a good idea for you to leave through the entrance Magnus built for us resistance members, he even has spare clothes." Buchtel nodded, holding her hand tightly. It was a shame that I could no longer hang out with him, but this is what we have chosen. "Goldblatt, you should probably leave first, and we will leave later." I nodded, getting up and placing 50 Reichsmarks on the table.

"That should cover the alcohol." I hummed, then placed a good 100 on the table. "And this should be enough to get him a decent place for a day or two. Best wishes to you all." I tipped my hat to them, downing my remaining beer and walking out of the private room, smiling. "Good night, Magnus, hope it doesn't get too rowdy here tonight! Buchtel got himself a real pretty lady, so he'll be here a while." Magnus nodded and waved, walking to the backroom, presumably to talk with the four. I simply walked out the door, heading to my apartment a few blocks away, pulling a cigarette from my coats pocket, grabbing a match as well, striking it off a brick wall I passed by. Lighting the small cigarette and putting it in-between my lips, staring at the burning match, just watching it dwindle down to my fingertips, feeling the heat scorch my skin; it felt good. It was punishment for my past mistakes, and it felt good, it burned and hurt but it felt wonderful and deserved. I couldn't help but smile, once all the match was gone, I pulled the cigarette from my mouth and exhaled contentedly, letting my footsteps slow as I neared my place. As always, my favorite dog was waiting for me at the window, staring at me with those big green eyes. "Hello there Clarisse. You have a good day?" I purred, stepping inside and quickly tossed the smoke, closing the door behind me. She quickly bounced over, her tail wagging, well, her entire body was wiggling. I smiled softly and sat on the couch, patting my lap, beckoning her to hop up. "Good girl, very good girl Clarisse!" I praised as she climbed into my lap, plopping her head down on my shoulder. "Are we going to sleep here tonight? Yeah, we are" I slowly felt my eyes fall, Clarisse resting on me only further lulling me to sleep. I let my eyes shut and leaned onto the couch, yawning as I drifted off to sleep.

I was six, sitting on the sidewalk outside my house, awaiting my mom's friends to arrive. My legs were crossed as if I was in school, my hair nicely slicked back. My mother had asked me to look nice for when they got here. She had said they would be driving a brand-new car, and that it was going to be very shiny so I couldn't get it dirty. She had said that they also had odd beliefs and that they were very different from me. They even spoke a different language. I couldn't help but be curious and fascinated by her descriptions, I wanted to be the one to greet these odd strangers, whose mother tongue was something called Hebrew, and who were so important that they had a pretty car. My parents only had an old dusty one, far from new and shiny. I had also been told that they had a son about my age, I wanted a new friend. Would he be as fancy as his parents seemed to be? Would he be nice? So many questions filled my small head, excitement built in me, unable to keep still I started to bounce my leg. Soon I had heard the buzz of a car motor, looking up curiously as a black Volkswagen stopped by the house. I bounced up to my feet, curiosity shining in my eyes as they stepped out of the car, a young woman helped a boy out of the backseat, the man walking up to me.

"Hello there little one" he said politely, bending down to my height and offering me a handshake. I was simply awestruck by how nice his suit looked. "My name is Clemens Habich, what's your name?"

"My name is Ian Goldblatt, nice to meet you Mr. Habich!" I had stuttered out, shaking his hand nervously "You look really really nice Mr. Habich. My momma told me that I could greet you!"

"Oh, that's wonderful, Ian, you are a very good greeter. Maja, look at this fine young man!" He called to the woman, who smiled, their son in her arms as she walked over.

"Hello, you are a very strapping young man." She complimented me, patting my head. "I'm Maja Habich, and this is my son Oli." Oli waved a bit, holding onto Maja. "Would you like to show us inside?" I nodded quickly, gently taking her hand and hurrying up to the door, opening it for them. "Thank you"

My mother had looked surprised to see them hear, saying something about them being early. Maja sat Oli down, whispering something to him and pushing him over to me. I gave a small wave, smiling awkwardly.

"Hello..." He had mumbled, staring at the floor. "Mama told me I had to make a friend."

"Hello! It's nice to meet you!" I said back cheerfully "I'll be your friend! My name is Ian, you're Oli, right?"

"Mhm." Our conversation continued like that for the rest of the day. He liked to write and draw, which is what we had done together, it was better than talking at that point. Our parents just talked business, nothing awfully interesting to me at that time. But Oli was definitely interesting, I wanted to be his friend so badly. He was just so interesting. My heart seemed to skip beats while he was near, almost like a crush I suppose it could have been called. Oh, Oli how I miss that man, he was a very fun kid....

Tuesday, March 7th, Paris, France

I sat up tiredly, rubbing my eyes as I sighed. Wonderful, another dream about him. I couldn't help but feel bitter about the memory, he was gone, he was gone, and it was my fault! Why does God hate me so much that I am tormented with the memories of Oli. I put my head in my hands, trying not to let the tears fall onto Clarisse. I felt my lip tremble, biting it hard to stop it, blood dripping down from my lip. Who was I kidding? I deserved to be tormented by the man I got killed. He had been doing fine in hiding, he was going to be able to escape but I stupidly opened my damn mouth! I deserved the pain, I deserved to suffer under his judgement. Judgement day will not be kind to me, and I deserve it.

There was a sharp knock on the door, Clarisse leaping out of my lap, and I got up, wiping the blood from my lips and opening the door, holding my head high despite looking like a mess. "I was told to escort you to work today. High command is still suspicious of you, Mr. Goldblatt." The young soldier said bluntly, I gave a nod, and let him into my home. "You look horrible."

"I know." I sighed, going to the bathroom to brush my hair and style it, carefully straightening the curls that threatened to show. I grabbed the small thing of foundation and used it to cover the bags under my eyes and the scars under my chin, blending it out.

"Hurry up! I don't want to be in trouble because you take longer than a woman to get ready!" The soldier yelled, I rolled my eyes and walked out of the bathroom, adjusting my uniform and cap, dusting off Clarisse's brown and white fur.

"Let me give her food and water for today and then we'll leave." I huffed out, whistling and Clarisse trotted after me. I poured her a cup of dog food and a thing of water, opening the back door so she could enter and exit as she needed. "Goodbye Clarisse, I'll be back soon, don't worry." I kissed her forehead and walked back to the living room, flicking off the lights as I walked. "And now I'm ready. You don't need to be so impatient."

"Shut up." He replied, walking out. Oh, what a lovely trip to work this would be, such a rude soldier.

"You really shouldn't talk that way to veterans, you know? It's awfully rude of you, and disrespectful to your country." He looked at me with disbelief as we got in his car. "What's that look for kid?"

"You're a veteran of the First War?" He asked as if it was near impossible for that to be the case.

"Yes. I fought all four years of the war kid, the war started a few weeks after I turned eighteen, and it ended when I was twenty-two, if you can't do basic math, I'm forty-two now. I'm flattered if you think that I look too young for forty." He seemed to stumble over his words as he started driving, a red blush creeping onto his face.

"I-I am very sorry sir; I was not aware that you were a veteran I- thank you for your service." He said with such shame I almost felt bad. I just stared down at him, a blank look on my face. "I am- very sorry that you had to go through the first war- my father was a soldier as well and he told me about how awful it was..."

"It was horrific kid. How old are you?"

"18 sir."

"Still training?"

"Mhm."

"I'd get out of the army if I were you. If the first war was horrific, this one is unspeakable. Lot worse weapons now kid. Just run while you can." I said calmly, looking out the window. "Now tell me kid, do you really believe in everything the government has told you? You seem like a bright kid; I would hope that you wouldn't be as foolish as to believe it all. Don't worry, nobody else will hear your answer."

"I'm not sure sir."

"Then why are you fighting for it? Why fight for something you don't fully believe in?" I sighed "I was in your shoes, those twenty-four years ago, I wasn't completely sure about the empire, even if it was my home, my father was proudly from Württemberg, now Baden-Württemberg, and he didn't like a unified Germany, he liked just being from Württemberg, nothing else. Gave me a lot of weird feelings about the empire." I took a deep breath, looking down at him. "But I decided, whether or not my father liked it, it was my home. We were fighting a war for our allies, Austria-Hungary, we were being noble in a war caused by assassination. That is why I fought, I wished to be noble."

"Where are you going with this sir?" he asked, a look of confusion on his face. I held up a finger as I took deep breaths.

"I cannot see anything noble about this war, we are hardly fighting for ourselves, nevertheless our allies. Take a good look at what's around you," I pointed to the men and women we drove by. "If they were doing what we are doing, the French that is, would you still think it's a glorious cause, or a disgusting invasion? What if they were killing men, women, and children?"

"I would be disgusted. Who wouldn't be?" I chuckled and patted his shoulder, whispering in his ear

"That, my friend, is what we are doing. Doesn't it feel gross?" He gave a nod, trembling a bit. "Everyone you see here are people, everyone that has been killed were people. What about back home? All men, women, and children, just like you. So just think about it." I hummed as I got out of the car, stretching "I assume you will be picking me up, so see you later kid." I gave him a wave and walked inside the office, letting my shoes click loudly on the floor. I looked down at my watch, I was an hour early for work. Lovely, I totally need to spend more time in this place. I tiredly walked to my desk, sitting down in the creaking chair and getting to work. I mindlessly worked for an hour before a good "friend" of mine came over.

"Goldblatt, there you are, normally you're late!" She chuckled, sitting next to me at her own desk "Since when are you early, or even on time?'

"Higherups don't trust me, so they had some kid drive me here, glad to see you though, it's been a while Steinbacher. Hope all is going well with your family."

"Oh yes, everything is going lovely, even better news is that me and Otto are going to be having a child! I can't believe it's finally happening." I gasped a bit, surprise clear on my face. "Yes, that's how he reacted too."

"Congratulations, I'm so happy for you Steinbacher! That is huge news, any name ideas for the little one?"

"Kaleb or Piet if it's a boy and Karolin or Josefine if it's a girl!" I grinned a bit.

"Those are wonderful names, I hope that the pregnancy goes smoothly, I assume that's why you've been out recently?" She nodded, a wide smile on her face. "If you and Otto need anything I'll be here, okay?"

"You're a sweetheart Goldblatt, thank you so much for the offer. I will be sure to tell Otto. Now, about you! See any pretty women as of late?" I stuttered out something, startled by the sudden question. Now there she sat with her chin rested on her hands, grinning. "Well, Goldblatt?"

"Yes-kind of, at Magnus's bar, you know Magnus, right?"

"Mhm"

"Well, there's this really pretty French girl that goes there a lot, Magnus told me her name is Natacha, and she has this gorgeous curly red hair. She can also handle her alcohol well too."

"Haha, of course that's important to you." I felt my face flush with that comment, now fully aware of how embarrassing this conversation was, I shut my mouth quickly and turned back to my desk. My face was alight with shame that I had started talking about my crush like a schoolboy! What a fool I was. I could hear Steinbacher laughing at my expense and warm tears started to trickle down my cheeks, even more shame building within me. "Oh, Goldblatt! You're so sweet!" She laughed, patting my shoulder. "Come on, don't cry!"

"Shut up Steinbacher." I hissed out, swatting at her hand as I tried to focus on my work. This was simply mortifying; how could I say such a thing? Tears just ran down my face, streaking the foundation on my cheeks slightly. How absolutely embarrassing, crying in the office. No matter what Steinbacher continued to giggle, yeah sure, she was a 'friend', but she didn't act like one. A bitter feeling welled up in my throat, but I simply swallowed it along with my pride. I was foolish for even speaking with her, this always happened. Suddenly something brushed against my leg, a barrel. My face went pale.

"Come on Ian~ talk to me, you don't want me to tell everyone your little secret, do you~?" I forgot about her blackmail. There was such a dangerous tone to her voice as the gun trailed up to my chest. "Tell everyone that you're a pathetic traitor, you wouldn't want that, would you?" she asked in a sickenly sweet voice, false cheer lacing her words.

"N-no ma'am." I stuttered out, it had been such a normal conversation, and the way she was able to switch it to threats shook me to my very core, the barrel of an 88mm pistol held to my Adams apple, the slightest of pressure on the trigger would kill me in mere milliseconds. An unfortunate reality for me. "I'm sorry for being rude." The barrel slowly left my neck, her malicious smile only growing,

"That's what I thought, Ian. Now don't be foolish and cry." I gave a stiff nod, my hands trembling as I wiped my tears, my breath coming out in short puffs of strangled air. "You really are cute Goldblatt, such a shame you're a traitor, you'd have a wonderful future here, but you needlessly threw it away, I can't understand why Ian."

"It doesn't matter ma'am" I mumbled, frozen in place, at any second, she could pull out that gun and end me. In some ways I wanted her to shoot me, to end my miserable existence, but like a coward I always ran from my opportunity out, I needed to face my painfully slow punishment for my crimes. Her hand grabbed my chin roughly.

"Oh, but Ian, to me it does, to me that is very important information." I swallowed my pride once more as my lips quivered. My brain was just screaming with the need to run, my leg bouncing with that primal urge to run and hide. She just smirked. "I know more than just your traitorous activities dear, don't be so shy."

"Yes ma'am... I-I joined the resistance because I felt bad about m-my old friend..."

"Your Jewish friend, whom you had a crush on."

"And I-I wanted to honor him, in- some way, as it is my fault that he's... dead." I sighed miserably. "He was my childhood best friend; I feel so horrible about what has happened to him."

"You're so sweet, feeling so guilty about such a stupid thing. Fucking fool." She spat, suddenly pulling me out of my chair. "Now you know what I want baby boy."

"Y-yes ma'am, I know what you want." My heart squeezed in pain at the idea, what would it be this time? What humiliation would I have to sit through? She pulled me into one of the meeting rooms, locking the door. "Tell me what to do ma'am..." The cold smile on her face pushed me over the edge, running to the door and trying to unlock it, only for a bullet to land solidly in my shoulder. A scream ripped itself from my throat, falling to my knees as I held my shoulder, feeling the blood run between my fingers.

"You should know better by now Ian, no running." She hissed, grabbing me by my shirt collar and pulling me back to the center of the room. It felt like I couldn't breathe, staring up at her with wide eyes. Memories of similar events kept hitting me in waves, my heart pounding. I couldn't even hear what she was saying, it was all a blur...

"Commander! Commander wait- please, don't leave me here for dead!" I rasped out, holding my side as blood oozed between my shaking fingers. The sergeant didn't even look back at me. "Please! Just help me up and I'll be fine- please commander, I'll do anything! Anything Commander!" My shaking hands grasped the bottom of his gray jacket, trying to keep him there but he only pulled away, kicking my hand. "Commander- please Sergeant Gottschalk! I-I can pleasure you! Since-Since there's no women out here- please." I begged desperately, finally the sergeant bent down, grabbing me by the jaw.

"Is that so Ian? And here I thought you were an honorable man, not a common whore." He had purred, his rough hand moving my head around curiously. "Oh, I don't see why I shouldn't take you up on such an offer, but it's simply hilarious that you of all men would offer it." I looked away in shame as he roughly pulled me to my shaking feet.

"T... Thank you, Commander." I stuttered out, being dragged into the trenches, my feet barely supporting my body. He had called for the medics with a grin, patting my pale cheek.

"Get better and then you give me your end of the deal." I only nodded as the medics carried me off, my vision fading as the adrenaline wore off. What kind of hell had I just thrown myself into?

The sharp pain of a pistol being brought down against my cheek brought me out of it, tears running down my face. It hurt, everything hurt. I couldn't help but let out a sob, falling forward and just curling up, it hurt, everything hurt I didn't want it to hurt. I heard her low chuckle, and I cried harder, I just could not stop crying, I wanted out.

"Oh Ian, you really are pathetic, but you're cute when you cry like this. I'll let you off easy today, but don't expect the same next time, understood?" I gave a weak nod. She pulled me to my feet and forced me to sit on a chair, digging through the cabinets until she found a first aid kit; lazily patching up where she had shot me and throwing me my shirt. Once I had it on, she helped me out of the room like nothing had happened, smiling her usual sweet smile. She sat me down at my desk and patched up my makeup, hiding the large welt forming where she had slapped me.

"Thank you Steinbacher." I said softly, dipping my head and going back to my paperwork, typing out documents for the higherups about the war efforts and simple numbers. Oh, how I hated this job, it was miserable and such dull work made me long for the excitement of the trenches, it was amazing how one could miss such hell. How I missed Germany as well, France was beautiful, but it was not home. I was deathly homesick, and I wanted to be back in the beautiful lands of Germany. No matter how much I wished I knew it would be a long time before I got to go home, if I got to go home. I thought back to Moineau's offer, I had a few months to think about it, and the more I thought about it the more tempting it was. But it also felt like a cheap way out of my well-deserved punishment, I deserved death for all I had done, yet Moineau seemed to think otherwise, somehow. I couldn't understand how. What did she and the others see in me? Bacher I could understand, he was a long-standing supporter of the French, and his mother was French, he was one of them, I was not. I was just German, a spoiled brat. Bacher had been working with them from the very beginning of the occupation of France, I only joined because I felt guilty; so why did they not want me punished? I was simply a dirty sinner.

I could feel more tears welling up in my eyes, but I rapidly blinked them away, struggling to read the letters I was writing. My fingers trembled as I typed, the pain in my shoulder flaring up with a burning sensation. People around me spoke about Bacher, how he wasn't here today, how unusual that was. Bacher was a model worker. I was worried about him, he was a younger man, only about twenty-five, far too young to be caught up in all of this.

"Hey Goldblatt! How drunk did you get Bacher last night? He must be hungover to not be here today." I chuckled a bit, rolling my eyes.

"I didn't get him that drunk, he's probably sick today. We only had a few beers." I snorted, leaning back in my chair and spinning to face the two other men. "Or maybe he grabbed a pretty lady and had too much fun with her."

"Bacher, being a ladies' man? No way!" They laughed and I couldn't help but laugh as well, grinning at the absurdity of Bacher getting a girlfriend. Bacher could barely talk to men, like hell he wooed a lady. I just laughed. "Seriously, I do hope Bacher is okay, he's never late, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know, he's probably sick, that's all. Don't worry too much about him, he's one of our best workers, so I don't feel too concerned." I shrugged a bit, getting up and walking over to the coffee machine and grabbing a cup. I sighed as I waited for my coffee to be finished, looking around the small room of desks. Most people didn't look up until the workday was over, tiredly typing away. I knew most of their names, on the far-right there was Anna Spieglemann, Pascal Neuner, and Bruno Lowenstam. The next row was Louisa Beitz, her sister, Josi Beitz, and Klemens Binger. Next was Killian Panzer, Alois Schuhbeck, and Alois Honigsberg. Most people felt bad for them since they had grown up together and were constantly mixed up. Then there was my row, Me, Oliva Steinbacher, and Vivian Wentzel. Vivian Wentzel rarely came to work, however. The row behind us was Wentzel's husband, Joshua Wentzel, who also rarely came to work, Torben Panzinger, and Niklas Hackenholt. Past them I didn't remember, however my coffee was done, so I sat down with it and got back to work. Hours of mindless typing were ahead of me, and I wasn't very excited about it. It was easier to simply daydream and pray I got it all right. I took a sip of my coffee and started typing, letting my mind wander.

I thought about my days in the trenches, those horrid cold nights, as awful as it was, there was always something to deal with in the morning, I was always moving around, helping the commanders. The deep mud never bothered me, it was the bodies beneath it that made me feel sick to my stomach. The mud was the closest thing to a burial those men would get. Simply thinking about it made my stomach churn. There were also the rats, tame compared to everything else. They were big, about the size of a cat. Hard to kill too, they were mostly fat, filled up on the bodies of the men. Even a danger couldn't seem to get through the fat that covered their oversized bodies. Every now and then one would trip some soldier and get them covered in mud, much to their distressed cries of annoyance.

"God damn RAT!" They would yell in frustration, throwing a random object at them. It was a common occurrence. I couldn't help but chuckle at the memories of frustrated soldiers cursing rats that tripped them, it was funny to look back on. I remember one time a particularly unfortunate fellow had been tripped by one during battle, he met a rather swift end at the hands of a mortar shell that landed on him. We used to joke that the rat was an allied spy, lucky little bastard got away just in time to avoid death. Poor ol Alexander, what a sad way to die, tripped by a rat and hit directly by a mortar shell. Of course, it was a sad occasion, but the absurdity of the whole ordeal had left us laughing, not that anyone outside of our trenches needed to know why there had been such a sudden uproar of laughter, not a single soul needed to know how poor Alexander died, not that he was tripped by a rat, not that he died because of it. I could feel giggles bubbling up my throat, my lips twitching into a smile as I tried to hold them back, poor ol Alexander, died after being tripped by a rat.

"Don't be like Alexander," We would say "Don't go tripping over those rats or you'll get a shell to the head, and we aren't going to clean your brain off the trench walls." I snorted, then giggled, covering my mouth. Oh, poor ol Alexander.

"Hey Goldblatt, are you okay?" I heard Panzinger ask, but I couldn't help but giggle, the little rat spy that killed ol Alexander. "Goldblatt, get a hold of yourself, what's got you giggling?" I looked back at him, still giggling, a stupid grin on my face.

"You remember old Alexander?" I snorted out, giggling more "How he died 'cause of that rat?" Panzinger nodded, confused. "The little spy rat that killed poor Alexander, how we would joke about not being like him?" Panzinger snorted a bit, nodding but still looking concerned.

"Yeah, I remember, that's what's got you giggling, huh?" I nodded, trying to keep quiet. "Maybe you need some fresh air, come on." Panzinger huffed, pulling me to my feet and out to the courtyard. "Come on, laugh, I know you're holding it in" And with that I started uncontrollably laughing, poor ol Alexander, killed by a rat. I laughed more, doubling over holding my sides. "Come on, get it together..." He mumbled, patting my injured soldier. I winced but kept laughing, I couldn't help it. Soon enough I felt lightheaded, dropping to my knees. There were tears in my eyes, the laughter had begun to hurt. "Ian, hey, Ian-!" Panzinger shook me, concern clean in his eyes as I finally got a breath in, a few more giggles rolling out of my mouth as his hands gripped my shoulders. "Ian, take a deep breath, good God..." He muttered, patting my back as I shakily breathed, my hands gripping my pants tightly.

"S-sorry about that P-Panzinger-" I giggled out, tears rolling down my cheeks. I still couldn't help the grin on my face even though I was crying.

"Don't worry about it Goldblatt, come on, let's get back to work." I nodded and we walked back inside the office, getting back to our endless paperwork. I sighed miserably and sipped my coffee, watching boredly as the hours ticked by, ignoring the chatter around me. God I was exhausted but what could I do? I needed to do my work, and I also needed to buy more food for Clarisse, I was running low. Tomorrow, I had another meeting with Moineau, early in the morning too. I had so much to do already, and it was only the 7th day of the month. Friday was my only break from the dull routine of the work I did. Perhaps I could go get drunk, that sounded like fun. I could only dream of something new. Maybe tomorrow would be better. God I could only hope it would be better.

#writblr #my writing #new author #book in progress #The French Resistance;By A. Dietrich

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kyovtani · 3 years

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𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 – 𝐤𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢 𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮 (𝟐)

— pairing: Kyoutani Kentarou x female Reader

— genre: smut, angst, little bit of fluff to keep the balance; tattoo artist!kyoutani, inexperienced!reader, strangers to lovers!AU, SLOW BURN

— word count: 9.6k

— warnings: swearing, mentions of infidelity and violence, as well as the consumption of drugs and alcohol; smut: corruption kink, degradation and dumbification, dacryphilia, praising, spitting, (soft) dom!kyou, oral (m. receiving), fingering, dry humping, unprotected sex (dont do that kids), impreg kink, iwaoi say hi-

— (A/N: and here’s part two! thank you SO much for all the love you sent my way after i published the first part. ngl i was a little nervous bc i thought it was boring and not interesting at all but you guys easily pushed me out of that hole so thank you for everything. i love and appreciate you with my whole heart. all the love, zade xx)

[ part one ]

— summary: after fucking up, you make it your mission to get him back..(im so bad at this pls just- okay.)

"He's not picking up, Hana", you say, another soft cry falling from your lips before you bury your face in your pillow.

“Once in my fucking life a guy treats me good and the way I've always wanted to be treated and I had to fuck it up. Why the fuck am I like this, Hana? Why can I not enjoy one fucking good thing in my fucking mediocre life", the profanities keep coming just like the tears and the amount of frustration and anger rushing through your veins is nowhere near normal anymore.

"Calm down, love", Hana sighs and makes you sit up so she can look into your tear stained face as she tries her best to make sure her words actually find their way to your pain clouded mind, "at this point you shouldn't worry too much because you do know Kyoutani, don't you? He does lose his temper a lot, so give him the time he needs and then you'll show up at his doorstep, suck his cock and make up with him, yeah?", she explains calmly.

"If this hurts you so much, why the fuck did you even say he's just a friend, Y/N? I really don't understand", Hana mumbles and lets out another sigh, her hands caressing yours softly, managing to calm you down a little bit.

“You're right, I should just– give him some time and things will eventually fall into place", you reply after crying a little more and with an encouraging smile your best friend nods at you before she suggests a movie marathon to which you happily agree.

At least something to distract you from all the demons inside your head.

After changing into your pj's and doing your night time routine, you plop down onto the couch next to your bestie again, her eyes focused on the phone in her hand and knowing she's probably either sexting or inviting her new boyfriend has you shrugging at her lack of attention as you start looking for a good movie to begin the night with.

However, just when you're about to read the description of some kind of french rom-com, Hana puts her phone back into her lap and starts staring at you with her pretty eyes widened in shock.

"What's wrong?", you ask and turn to look at her, reaching for her hands but before you even get the chance to touch her, Hana unlocks her phone and holds it up for you to watch someone's instagram story.

The video begins with loud music, a crowd full of young college students whose faces definitely are familiar.

Everyone in the video is dancing, making out, smoking and just chatting in a random living room and every now and then there's someone yelling in the back – a typical college party.

However, just as the video is about to end, the camera shifts to a tall male leaning against the wall, obviously standing really close to the person who's filming and it takes you a full blown thirty seconds to realize who said male is.

Kyoutani Kentarou.

You stare at the phone for another minute, your throat dry and your head empty as a thick veil of tears slowly starts blurring your sight before you finally decide to pay attention to the username.

"He can't be fucking serious", you hiss, fisting the blanket beneath you, the urge to punch something or someone becoming unbearable, "what the fuck is he doing at a random college party with – Sora?"

"Y/N, don't–", "Whose party is that?", you interrupt your best friend, not giving a single fuck about her attempts to calm you down; not anymore. Hana gulps harshly and strictly avoids your gaze as she mumbles a name and you roll your eyes, asking her to speak up with an annoyed sigh.

"It's one of Yuuji’s frat parties", and as soon as your best friend says the name of your ex-boyfriend, a cold shiver of disgust runs down your spine and you can feel yourself getting lightheaded from all the emotions rushing through your overwhelmed body.

"Don't follow me if you're going to stop me from leaving, Hana", you say and stand up before quickly disappearing inside your room.

You have no idea how you manage to get dressed, your outfit consisting of a pair of jeans and a hoodie you can't even remember buying and you don't even wanna think about what your hair and face look like when you end up leaving the house with your keys and your phone.

After driving this route for over two years on an almost daily basis, it takes you less than ten minutes to arrive in front of the huge house your ex-boyfriend lives in.

The memories start finding their way back into your head way too fast, taking away your breath and numbing your whole body because even if you didn’t love Yuuji anymore, the bitter feeling of betrayal still manages to hit you in just the right way.

It takes you a lot of willpower to actually approach the house and eventually get in. And after being in between the crowds of drunk, stinky college students, you remember why you hate college parties so much.

"I – Wow”, a familiar voice manages to break through the loud music, your instant reaction just an annoyed eye roll, “you were the last person I expected to see at one of our frat parties", Yuuji says and comes to stand in front of you.

His blonde hair messily falling into his handsome face and from the way his whole face seems to be covered in the deepest shade of red – including his eyes – you know that he's probably higher than the stars and you can't help but sigh.

"I'm not here to party, Yuuji", you hiss, feeling the anger crawl up your spine again the longer you look at your ex, "my boyfriend is here and I have to talk to him."

"So you and that tattooed guy are actually a thing? Didn't think so since he, you know – showed up with another girl", Terushima mumbles and pulls out a cigarette from his pocket, a mischievous smile on his lips.

"Oh, shut the fuck up, Yuuji", you spit back and roll your eyes, taking in the way the pretty boy arches his brows up in pure shock at your rather new attitude, "go and get high or whatever you do to feel proud of yourself", are the last words you say to him before you walk away, your heart thrumming inside your throat.

Your eyes roam the huge crowd, desperately searching for the only face you wanna look at right now and you try to remember where they were standing in the video Sora had posted only to realize that you can't remember.

After all you only watched the video once, your whole attention laying on Kyoutani. And after almost fifteen minutes, you find yourself slowly giving up.

Maybe this was just not meant to happen or maybe Kyoutani has left already.

He probably left with Sora- something you can’t and won’t ever blame him for.

After all she's literally one of the prettiest and hottest girls you have ever seen – anyone who rejects her would be out of their mind (or not attracted to girls which isn't the case when it comes to Kyoutani).

You give it another ten minutes of desperately looking around before you let out a deep sigh which gets lost in the loudness and thick air of the party before you finally start making your way back to the front door.

You quickly walk back to your car, trying your best to ignore everyone around you, especially all the drunk guys who are currently about to get into a verbal fight over something totally random and the last thing you want to experience those threats becoming reality.

At some point you're scared they might even include you which is probably why you end up literally sprinting and even though you always park so far away from frat houses just because you've heard way too many stories of people getting their cars stolen during parties, but right now you just wished you would have listened to your gut feeling and parked in front of the fraternity like every normal person.

However, to your life long luck, you spot a tall figure standing a little too close to your vehicle just as you’re about to unlock it. You slow down your movements almost instantly upon seeing the stranger, yet your eyes still try to figure out if it's someone you know despite the darkness surrounding the two of you.

He has probably spotted you by now, after all you're still panting like crazy from speed walking down to where your car is and it takes you a full minute to realize how loud you're actually being.

"Y/N", the male suddenly says, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine and even though it could have been everyone, it sounds a tad bit too familiar to your ears which is probably why you end up approaching him slowly.

"It's me, Kyoutani", he adds and at the same moment the words leave his lips, you finally recognize his pretty features which seem extra beautiful underneath the bright moonlight.

And then realization hits you.

"How did you know–", "Hana called me and asked if I could make sure you got home even if I didn't want to talk to you. So, here I am. Get in the car so I can tell her I did my part of the job", he interrupts you quickly, obviously not having the intention to interact with you and the way his usually so tender-filled eyes and calming voice are nothing but ice-cold has a thick veil of tears blurring your sight.

Never ever did you think about the moment, where Kyoutani puts the cold mask on he loved to hide behind when he had first looked at you all those weeks ago.

And the longer he avoids your gaze, the heavier the burden on your chest becomes.

"I'm sorry, Tani", you whisper, your voice breaking at the end, easily giving away how much his cold demeanor has gotten to you.

“Of course you're not just a friend to me and I d-don't know why I introduced you like that, everything happened so quickly and I – panicked. It's not an excuse and does not justify my behavior but I just wanted you to know that you've always been more than just a friend to me", you continue, managing to keep talking upon realizing that Kyoutani won't interrupt you and the way he even listens to you with his eyes looking everywhere but yours is absolutely enough for you.

"What am I to you then, Y/N? Am I the guy you're casually fucking? Your booty call? Am I your second choice? Like what the fuck do you expect me to say? I know we never put a label to – this", he starts pointing at you and then himself, "but you knew I was serious about it, about you. So, I just don't understand why you would even think about considering me a friend. I told you that I am not one for that friends with benefits kinda shit and you agreed yet you did this and now I can't help but be convinced you just used me to get that Yuuji fucker.”

Kyoutani is angry and he doesn't even try to hide it as he spits out those words, the ones he’s probably been dying to say out loud for the past few days and you know he has every right to actually be mad at you, his words still hit you in a way you didn't expect them to.

"I'd never do that to you, Kentarou; I'd never use you like that, please believe me", you say quickly, a little surprised you're even able to form proper sentences.

“You m-mean so much to me and I just don't know how to put it into words. My heart hurt so much when I watched you type your number into Sora's phone but the demons in my head, they just kept talking over my heart and – I'm just really sorry, Kyou, I really am", you sigh and after realizing that he's not going to look at you, you finally manage to shift your gaze away from his pretty face.

"Go home, Y/N. It's been a long day for both of us and I think some more distance will help me get my mind straight", Kyoutani replies after a long, torturous beat of silence lingering in the cold air and even if it wasn’t the reply you had hoped to hear, you're glad he's at least not completely ending it.

"Okay b-but at least let me drive you home?", you ask softly, wiping away the few tears which had managed to escape and when you look up at the beautiful faced male in front of you, his eyes meet you for the first time since what feels like forever and you feel yourself melting away.

"I don't think that's a good idea, pretty girl", Kyoutani sighs, the soft pet name sending your mind into the sweetest haze of comfort just like that, "it's only been a few days but I am craving your touch and I just know I'm going to lose it and fuck you against the next best surface if we get into that car together, so I have to decline this offer", he adds and takes another step back, his lips stretching into a tiny smile and you can’t deny how much his words have you gotten you worked up, but you have no choice but to nod.

"Have a good night, baby", Kyoutani sighs and deep down you're hoping for a kiss, after all it's been way too long since you got to feel close to him but instead, he just lifts his hand up and starts waving at you and just as he is about to turn around, you find yourself reaching for his wrist. The fear and despair inside of you making you a little too brave for your personal liking but you know you can't just let him walk away like that.

"Please, Tani- Kyoutani", you whisper and let out a soft sigh of relief when he turns around to face you again, "I won't try anything, I just want to spend a little bit more time with you."

Kyoutani takes a deep breath, his dark eyes roaming your face and wandering down your body and even though it feels like he's literally devouring you alive, you enjoy his burning gazes regardless, a hidden part inside of you even craving them.

A solid minute passes by before he lets out a sigh and gives you a nod, his plump lips pressed into a thin line.

It takes you another deep breath and a couple of seconds to actually calm yourself down from the rollercoaster of emotions you've been through within the time span of an hour and as you sit there in your car, inhaling the cold air of the night, your mind starts replaying everything that went down, starting from the day you met Kyoutani, to your first and most recent kiss, as well as the encounter with Sora and your deep anger towards Yuuji.

The drive to Kyoutani's apartment passes by in a blur, way too fast for your liking and you can't help but pout when you pull up in front of the huge building, knowing very well that this will be the last interaction with the handsome tattoo artist for the upcoming few days and you can already feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes.

He's been awfully quiet, not like you actually said anything but Kyoutani's silence was intense, boring into your soul and actually suffocating you to a point where the urge to just jump out of the car became overwhelming.

You know he's probably going through everything just like you, yet the feeling that his thoughts are more on the negative side just won't leave you alone and you hate the way your assumptions are being confirmed as soon as Kyoutani turns to look at you.

"I – love you, Y/N", he suddenly says, his voice soft and calm, yet still deep and the way it's filled with tenderness and the sweetest bit of longing makes the effect of those magical words even heavier.

Your lips part in shock, your head having a difficult time actually processing his confession and you can feel your whole body going into a standby mode.

"But you're not good for me."

You remember the way your heart broke into thousands of pieces when you found out the alleged love of your life was cheating on you without even batting an eye.

The pain was so intense and heavy, you didn't know how to deal with it and at some point you were convinced that your heart had stopped beating for a solid minute. It was bad, left you speechless and threw you into a hole of darkness you barely managed to escape from, yet still leaving you grateful for the experience.

You thought your first heartbreak would be able to prepare you for what's to come in the future, but what you went through as soon as those words had fallen past Kyoutani’s lips, can't be compared to anything you've ever felt before.

Your heart starts clenching as his words keep replaying inside of your head and your throat so is going absolutely dry from your desperate attempts to gasp for air as the feeling of being suffocated comes back.

Everything around you seems to disappear, your eyes still focused on Kyoutani's intense gaze as the feeling of emptiness starts filling up your whole body.

You easily lose track of time, your heart beat so slow and heavy and when the wave of reality crashes you yet again, an almost inaudible sob falls past your lips.

"B-But...", you can't get yourself to speak, the words getting stuck in your throat and soft cries the only thing filling the inside of your car.

And yet, there are so many things you want to tell him, so many things rushing through your mind at the highest speed, almost impossible to grasp them and actually put them into proper sentences.

"You have too much control over me. I lost myself trying to fit into the picture of a lover you need and deserve. But – I am not who I used to be anymore”, Kyoutani explains, nervously rubbing the sides of his pierced node with his thumb as he avoids looking in your direction at all costs.

“I am scared of losing what's obviously not mine. You make me feel weak and vulnerable and I just can't deal with it. You've become the center of my world, and I can't control how much it affects me. How much you affect me and – I hate it", he continued, his voice is still incredibly calm, yet a bittersweet tone of fear coating every single one of his words.

"B-But...", yet again, the whole of your vocabulary seems vanished, not one word to say as the knot in your throat tightens even further.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I thought I could do it but – I am not meant to love and you deserve to be loved in the most special way possible”, he takes another quick break, letting out a sigh of exhaustion, “and that's why I'm letting you go. Please, don't hate me. Take care and – goodbye, my love.”

Those are his last words before he presses his lips against your forehead, making your head spin like crazy because of the contrast of his heartbreaking words and his soft kiss.

Kyoutani leaves without saying another word. He doesn't even look back once as he walks away and enters the apartment building, while you can't stop staring at the door with hot tears streaming down your cheeks and loud sobs filling the suffocating air surrounding you.

There you are, yet again.

Your eyes staring into the dark night as your body tries to cope with the intensity of pain you've thought you had overcome.

The constant breaking of your heart starts numbing every part of your body and you slowly start losing yourself in this certain kind of darkness.

Seconds turn into minutes and without even realizing, a whole hour has gone by with you staring into nothing.

Your mind plays games with you as it keeps replaying his words, his behavior, his kiss and the feeling of slowly but certainly going insane as you get out of the car a little too fast.

You tumble back, the sudden coldness hitting you right in the face and the mental as well as physical exhaustion has your body trembling.

And then it hits you.

The wave of anger, wrath, frustration and hatred literally wakes you up, pulls you back into reality and ends up taking over you completely.

Your eyes find the huge apartment building Kyoutani lives in, staring at it as if you could set it on fire and you know what you're about to do is a bad idea but your body acts before your mind can even get the chance to intervene.

And that's how you find yourself almost brutality slamming your fist against Kyoutani's door, your heart hammering against your rib cage way too fast for it to be still physically healthy and ten thousand different thoughts rushing through your chaotic mind.

"What the fuck is going – Y/N", Kyoutani looks at you with his pretty eyes slightly widened in shock, his lips parting as he struggles to keep his eyes on you and a disgusting feeling of shame and embarrassment starts filling you up.

You know this is pathetic, you are aware of how stupid you look standing in front of him like this but you just can't get yourself to actually care about it.

"Y/N, please don't-", "No, I listened to what you had to say and now I'm going to talk and you're going to listen to me. Before that I am not going anywhere because I deserve this", you cut him off, hands balled into fists as you try to stay calm but the more you think about his words in the car, the angrier you get.

"I–", Kyoutani sighs, his eyes nervously roaming your face and upon noticing the way you seem to shiver from the cold and your lack of clothing, he lets his conscience get the best of him, "alright, come in then.”

You follow him inside, the familiar scent of vanilla and Kyoutani's favorite febreeze scent filling your nose and you hate the way how comfortable you are.

After all you've been spending quite some time in this apartment; visiting him after your classes so he could bury his face between your legs and then offer you some homemade food, followed by a good old ghibli movie and lots of cuddles has become some kind of routine.

Oh, how you hate him for ruining all of those memories.

"Do you want something to drink? You're probably freezing", he offers, his voice filled with concern and you know he is right and you'd definitely give everything for a cup of tea and maybe some water, you still shove all of your body’s basic needs into the very back of your head and try to regain your composure.

"I – you – we", you take a deep breath, your mind struggling to put all of those racing thoughts into some kind of order, yet failing miserably.

But there's so much you want to say to him; so many things you want him to hear and now that you are actually standing in front of him, your body betrays you.

"You're a fucking coward, Kyoutani Kentarou", is the first thing you finally manage to let out, "and I hate you for leaving me like this. I fucking hate you.”

Deep down, you hate yourself for saying those words; the choice of words and the incredible heaviness they come with are usually not your way of expressing yourself yet you're not regretting them.

You don't know how this night is going to end, maybe this will be the last time you get to see Kyoutani or he'll eventually fuck you into oblivion and you finally end up together; but nevertheless you want your words to hurt him; you want them to wake him up just like his did to you.

"How dare you confess your love to me and tell me I basically ruined your life in the same breath when you're the one who's fucking all of this – us up. Yes, I’ve made a mistake and I've been regretting my choice of words for the past four days, even came to the point where I accepted your distance and decided to let go because I know how much my words hurt you. But us ending like this? Definitely not going to happen", Kyoutani stares at you with his pretty eyes focusing you attentively, barely blinking, not moving at all; he’s just listening to you.

"I just – don't understand how you can be this oblivious."

"Oblivious? Oblivious to what?", he asks, his voice a little deeper and raspier, sending goosebumps straight dow your spine as if your body needed to remind you the effect he has on you.

"Oblivious to everything. This is what love does to people, Kentarou. Of course you're going to feel weak and vulnerable because of me - because of the one you love. After all the point of being loved and loving someone else is showing those vulnerabilities and weakness to the person you trust the most because you know, or at least you hope, they won't take advantage of it.”

You take a deep breath, your mind slowing down as you ease yourself into his calming embrace and subconsciously losing yourself in the comfort it comes with.

“I'm yours. I've been yours since the very first day and we both know this, that's why you are so scared of losing me. And that's why my words hurt you so much”, you can tell that he’s already processing your words as much as he can; his habit of scratching the back of his head giving him away easily.

"You said you've lost yourself trying to fit into this picture of someone who I deserve but – you are the one who created that picture in the first place. Just because my first boyfriend was an alleged goody two shoes doesn't mean that you have to be like that too. Fuck that", you hiss, the thought of Kyoutani changing even the slightest bit about himself sending jolts of anger through your veins, "I don't care if you dropped out of college or that you have tattoos and piercings and bleach blonde hair. None of that matters to me because it's you, your kind heart and your pure soul I fell in love with.”

And suddenly - you can feel the burden on your shoulders disappear when those certain words leave your lips and the second Kyoutani raises his eyebrows in slight surprise before he locks eyes with you again has another breath of fresh air run through your suffocated lungs.

"Yes, I'm in love with you, Kyoutani Kentarou. Believe it or not, but for me, you're perfect just like this, with all your tiny habits and every single tattoo. There's nothing I'd change about you and I'm genuinely, truly sorry if I ever made you feel like you needed to change for me. You're a great guy and I guess that's why I ran back here after sitting in that car, crying for an hour because I couldn't stop thinking about the way you confessed your love to me”, you feel the thick veil of tears appear before they manage to block your sight, making the pretty face in front of you turn into bourry little pixels as your emotions overwhelm you.

“And yes, you are meant to be loved; maybe not meant to be loved by me but you deserve to be loved, do you hear me?"

You go up to him, closing some of the distance between the two of you before your finger darts out and poke his strong chest, trying to ease the tension after letting go of all those thoughts, "you deserve to love and to be loved because you're a good person. And I just – wanted to thank you for letting me into your life. Meeting you, getting to know the beautiful person you are has been one of the best things that has happened to me and I will cherish these memories forever."

And with those words you take a deep breath, let out another sigh, goving away your acceptance of defeat before you lift your head and prepare yourself to say your last goodbye no matter how painful it is.

"Take care, Kyoutani Kentarou and thank you, for everything", the words fall past your lips in the form of a whisper solely because you're too scared to break if you raised your volume just slightly.

You turn around and feel the first tear find its way down your cheek before you even get to walk away.

And just as you wrap your fingers around the doorknob, the sound of rushed footsteps approaching you makes you halt your movements.

"D-Don't go", Kyoutani suddenly says, his voice breaking when he comes to stand behind you, so close you can actually feel the warmth he's radiating, "I need you...so bad", he whispers into your ear, pressing his forehead against the back of your neck and it's like everything that happened tonight becomes irrelevant.

You turn around, not expecting Kyoutani to push you against the door with his whole body, yet still embracing him as much as you can.

With a soft sob, you start inhaling his unique scent, grazing his soft skin with your fingers and letting the warmth blossom inside of your chest after feeling his rapid heartbeat beneath your palm.

"Don't leave me, please", he cries, the tears running down his flushed cheeks despite his desperate attempts of holding back, "let's do this whole love thing.”

You stand there for what feels like an eternity, just hugging each other, taking in each other's presence and calming down from everything that has happened in such a short time. You finally calm down completely, Kyoutani's soft touches and tiny kisses give you the last bit of energy you needed and for the first time in almost three months, there's not one demon in your head trying to make you overthink something.

Because this feels perfect; there's literally no other word to describe the feeling of holding Kyoutani Kentarou and being held by him.

But nevertheless, you've been on a constant adrenaline rush for the past four hours and the exhaustion has been killing you, making you grow tired a lot faster than usual.

"What about moving this to your room, hm? I'd rather fall asleep with you in your bed than against the door; especially because I know the boys are out and will be coming home soon", you say softly, lifting Kyoutani's head from the crook of your neck and looking at him.

He sighs and gives you a soft kiss, giving you a nod in response before he gets himself to let go of you; his warmth leaving with him and it's almost disgusting how you literally crave his presence.

After Kyoutani makes you drink two glasses of water to avoid the dehydration of your body, he hands you one of his thick hoodies and leaves you to get ready in his bathroom.

You come back to the sight of him sitting against the headboard of his king sized bed, his oversized shirt revealing the perfect amount of collarbones and you enjoy the sight of his pretty skin and the dark lines covering most of it as well as the way his sweats hug his strong thighs in the best way possible.

And as you watch his eyes lazily roam your body, a hot jolt of arousal finds its way through your veins and right to your cunt.

"Don't look at me like that, sweet girl", Kyoutani suddenly groans and cocks his head to the side, his tongue poking out to wet his lips before he gulps harshly; his eyes never once leaving yours.

"B-But Tani...", you reply, approaching him with tiny steps become you come to stand right next to his tall figure, feeling yourself growing needier because of the way your body is craving his touch now more than ever.

“Baby…”, he replies and gulps harshly, knowing your body better than yourself after weeks of getting to know you in a way nobody has ever before.

"Please, Tani...please, fuck me. I need to feel you inside of me. I've been waiting for so long...", you plead, your fingers coming to graze his pretty lips as memories of all the times he had turned you into a crying mess with those lips.

Kyoutani is just as affected by the change in tension as you, the slight bulge in his grey sweatpants as well as the hunger burning in his eyes giving him away.

"You're such a pretty angel girl, aren’t you?", he whispers and sits up, pulling you closer to make you stand in between his legs as he starts caressing your hot cheeks with his fingers.

“Yet you're saying all those naughty things”, Kentarou chuckles deeply, “imagine how people would react if they knew what a cockhungry little slut you actually are", upon hearing those degrading names, your cunt starts clenching around nothing and a high pitched whimper escaped your throat.

"For you...", you whisper, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth the second Kyoutani starts placing open mouthed kisses on your neck.

Your fingers dig into his shoulders, pulling the material of his shirt a little too tightly.

"Of course, baby, you're mine after all and this sweet cunt", the sudden feeling of his palm pressing against the damped fabric of your panties has you gasping for air, "belongs to me, and me only", Kyoutani grunts, pulling the skin of your neck between his lips before he starts sucking gently as well as slowly moving his fingers against the lacey fabric between your legs.

"Yes, it's yours", you reply, after several weeks of being intimate with Kyoutani you've learned one thing and that's how much he loves hearing you say all those dirty and lewd things, "please fuck me."

"Patience, my love, patience. I am going to fuck you", Kentarou replies calmly and suddenly pushes you away, his hands disappearing from your body and when your lid flutter open because of the lack of touch, he shoots you one of his cocky smirks, "but let's not forget the whole friend situation, hm? What about you make it up to me before I fuck you like the little whore you are?"

His words have excitement rush through your blood, your head literally spinning just from the thought of finally getting to be on the giving end after weeks of him playing the selfless lover.

You nod eagerly, anticipation sparkling in your eyes as you watch him palm himself over his sweats before you get on your knees and wait for him to let go of his now fully erect cock.

However, the more seconds pass by like this, the more nervous you become because for some reason you suddenly remember that you've basically never sucked dick before.

Your head shoots up with slight panic written all over your face and of course Kyoutani notices your change in demeanor right away.

"What's wrong, angel?", he asks you and stops the movements of his hands.

"I don't know how to do it, Tani", you whisper, knowing there's no point in being shy about it, after all he happens to be the guy you've experienced your most firsts with.

"It's okay, baby, I'm going to help you”, Kyoutani replies and actually loses his composure for a second, “fuck baby, don't look at me like this when I'm literally about to fuck your throat", he hisses, throwing his head back as he grunts and his hips desperately bucking into the air.

Kyoutani takes another deep breath before he finally pushes his hand underneath the waistband of his sweats and with your eyes focused on his movements, you watch him pull out his hard length, a soft hiss falling past his plump lips when the coldness of the room grazes the slightly wet tip of his cock.

You gulp harshly, his impressive size in girth as well as length has your pussy throbbing like crazy, yet you can't help but wonder how the hell he's going to fit inside of you.

“Don't worry, baby, I know you're going to take all of my cock like the good girl you are", Kyoutani says after observing your facial expressions for some time.

"Give me your hand", he asks you softly, his voice still raspy and incredibly hoarse yet still soothing and you appreciate his attempts to calm himself down so you won't feel too nervous. With your heart slamming against your rib cage, you lift your hand up and are slightly overwhelmed at the sudden feeling of Kyoutani's warm spit pooling inside your palm. Without adding anything, he straightens himself and motions you to stroke his hard cock.

Not once do you stop looking at him as you wrap your fingers around the base of his impressive length and slowly start jerking him off.

Kyoutani cocks his head to the side, his bottom lip pulled in between his teeth and his eyes constantly fluttering close.

"Start with the tip, angel- just wrap your lips around it and start sucking, but be careful with your teeth, yeah baby?", he grunts, his hips thrusting into your fist every time the pace of your strokes slows down.

You give him yet another nod before look up at him one more time and do as he says.

The feeling of his cock between your lips is – different.

It feels like it's not supposed to be there, yet the salty taste of his precum coating your tongue has you sighing softly. Your tongue darts out, giving his tip a tiny kitten lick before you go back to sucking on it eagerly.

And while you seem to enjoy it a lot, Kyoutani is going absolutely crazy. You can see the way he's tensing his body as his grip in the bed sheets tightens and the vein on his neck pops out.

"F-Fuck, baby, just like that", he praises you "now try to take more of it in a-and use your hand for the rest", Kyoutani's voice is shaky, his eyes are nervously roaming your swollen lips and the string of spit connecting them to the tip of his cock.

Without giving it another thought, you take a deep breath and take more of him, trying your best to not graze his sensitive cock with your teeth and despite your initial struggle, you still enjoy the feeling of his cock on your tongue.

You subconsciously wrap your fingers around the part of his cock which you can't fit inside your mouth and suddenly it's like your body knows exactly what to do.

Kyoutani's moans grow louder and the soft thrusts of his hips become a little less controlled. You look up at him every now and then, trying your best to keep the steady rhythm as you bop your head.

And then he suddenly thrusts his length all the way to the back of your throat, your gag reflex just about to go off when he pulls back which is the moment you take notice of the tears streaming down your cheeks.

You give him a soft smile before going back to wrapping your lips around his tip, but you don't get very far.

Kyoutani pulls you back, his grip on the back of your neck not firm enough to hurt you.

"I promise I'm going to fuck your throat properly and even cum in your mouth the next time we do this but right now I just can't stop thinking about that tight cunt of yours", he says, helping you get up and almost instantly pulling you onto his lap; his wet cock rubbing against your panty covered core as Kyoutani pulls you in for a kiss.

It's sloppy and rushed, the way his tongue grazes over yours before he pulls it between his lips and starts sucking at it. Your hips start moving against his cock, your sensitive pussy craving some kind of friction as the arousal has your head spinning like crazy.

You start moaning and whimpering into his mouth when Kyoutani’s hips start meeting your desperate movements, applying the perfect amount of pressure onto your needy clit.

You feel the knot in the pit of your stomach tightening, the clenching of your cunt becoming worse the more you hump Kyoutani's cock like a woman starved.

But nothing prepares you for the feeling of one of his large digits entering you. Your hole start clenching around his finger Kyoutani pushes another one in, both digits buried inside of your little cunt.

"Such a good girl for me, aren't you, baby? I'm going to finger you nice and slow so you're ready for my cock. Now come on, my love; show me what a good whore you are and ride my fingers", Kyoutani encourages you, his hot breath fanning against the sensitive skin behind your ear and without missing a beat, your hips meet the skillful thrusts of his fingers.

Kyoutani continues to whisper naughty things into your ear, his other hand eventually wrapping around your throat as he makes sure you look into his eyes when you stumble over the edge.

Your high hits you hard and fast, the intensity knocking the breath out of your lungs and leaving you gasping for it; something you should be used to by now yet still can't believe is even possible.

He pushes you off of his lap softly, helps you get rid of his shirt as well as your ruined panties before he makes you lay down in the middle of his bed; eyes locking with yours when he also starts undressing.

"My pretty girl", Kyoutani sighs, his hand caressing the soft skin of your thighs, spanking you every now and then just because he's absolutely obsessed with the way your whole body tenses whenever his hand meets your skin.

“Look at me", he orders and almost instantly your head shoots up to meet his gaze, the sight of his naked body distracting you a lot more than you expected but after all this is the first time you get to see the rest of his tattoos; the ones you usually only get a tiny glimpse of depending on his outfit choice.

Kyoutani spreads your legs apart, his eyes never leaving yours even when he starts jerking off again and you can't hold back the soft whimpers and begs leaving your lips.

But also something about his flushed cheeks and swollen lips as well as his messy hair falling into his face has you incredibly turned on.

"We've never talked about this before but are you on the pill, baby?", he asks, pushing one of his thumbs into his mouth before he brings it down to your clit and starts rubbing soft circles into it, making you arch your back off of the mattress as you bury your face in the pillow to keep your noises down.

"N-No", you whisper, a deep sigh coming from Kyoutani and even though you know you shouldn’t do it, you stop him from bending over to the drawer of his nightstand, making him look at you in confusion.

“But I still want you to raw me, please...", you add and gulp harshly when his whole body seems to go into some kind of haze once the words leaveyour lips.

Kyoutani looks at you, his eyes darkening even more as he pulls his bottom lip between his teeth and lets out a loud moan of your name.

"I can't just raw you, baby", he presses through gritted teeth, his mask slowly falling apart the more you rub yourself against his cock, "you've never had sex without a condom and my pull out game is weak, even weaker when it comes to you because fuck – the thought of filling you up with my cum sounds so fucking good", Kyou groans when you scoot up a little, taking his length into your hand before you line him up with your entrance.

"B-But what if you get pregnant, sweet girl?", he sighs and tries to pull away, making you wrap your arms around his neck as you look into his pretty eyes.

"That will just show everyone around us how well you've fucked me", you whisper and elicit another deep moan from him, his whole body shaking slightly as he tries to hold himself back from just pounding into you.

"Such a cockhungry whore", he hisses and – finally – starts pushing his fat cock into your tiny cunt, the slight stretch making you both gasp for air.

“If that's what you want, then that’s what you get, you little slut. I'm going to fucking raw you and fill you up with all of my cum, make you my cumslut", Kyoutani grunts, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth before he harshly grabs your face and looks into your eyes as he buries more of himself inside of you.

"F-Fuck, you're big", you whimper, throwing your head back and trying your very best to stop clenching around his cock.

“We're almost there, baby- you got this, s-stop clenching", Kyoutani grunts against your parted lips. Without a warning, Kyoutani pushes the rest of his huge cock inside of you, bottoming out completely.

“F-Fuck...you’re so– tight”, Kentarou grunts, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, “it’s like you’ve never been fucked before.”

“S-So good...so fucking good, nngh-”, your little whimpers and whines are slurred, barely coherent as the feeling of being filled to the brim pushes you into a haze of pleasure.

You feel the pulsation of his cock against your spongy walls, his hands nervously roaming your body and groping one of your tits, as he obviously tries to calm himself down.

And then he finally starts moving.

A deep, guttural moan leaves the both of you when he pulls himself out of your tight hole, dragging his huge cock along the walls of your little cunt in the most delicious way possible before he almost brutally shoves himself back in again.

“Mhm, just like that, you little brat”, he grunts, sitting up on his knees as he pushes your legs further apart, his eyes focusing the way his fat cock stretches your hole just how he’s been imagining it all this time, “coming up to me and talking about having your little cunt rawed like some cumhungry little whore.”

You start nodding almost instantly at his words, your brain barely recognizing them, the only thing you can focus on being the way the tip of his cock grazes the entrance to your womb with every harsh, brutal thrust of his hips.

His thrusts find a steady rhythm, hard and so, so deep.

“Open your mouth”, Kyoutani grunts, a single drop of sweat finding its way down the center of his tattooed chest, the sight making you whimper and whine for him even louder as you part your lips as soon as you process his words.

“You know what? I’d rather have you say it”, he suddenly hisses, pulling his cock out of your spasming cunt before he presses your legs together and shoves himself back inside of you with one skilled thrust of his hips.

You have no idea at what point you start crying but by the time Kyoutani's moans and grunts start picking up their pace, you're a sobbing mess.

“S-Say wh-what?”, you sob, hiding your tear and spit stained face behind your hands, not daring to look up at him.

“I want you to ask for my spit and beg for my cum”, Kentarou’s voice grows raspier, the dominance seething through every single one of his words makes it so easy for you to fall even further into the hole of absolute submission, “and stop hiding yourself, angel girl..I wanna watch the way I’m fucking your brains out.”

A row of loud, high pitched whines and a combination of sobs and moans are the only thing you manage to respond with, your brain clouded with the feeling of his thick cock dragging along the spongy walls of your cunt.

And before you can even comprehend his next movement, you hear the loud sound of skin meeting skin followed by the delicious feeling of a sting sending jolts of pain through your body, something you’ve come to love after so many hours with the tattoo artist.

“I told you to ask and beg for it, angel girl..you’re making me wait”, Kentarou spits, never once halting the movements of his hips as he watches the way you start sobbing even more, your cunt spasming around his cock after his painful spank.

“Please...f-fuck, please spit in my mouth and my face and on my cunt- want it all”, you start brabbling, another row of incohrent begs following right afterwars as your hips sloppily meet his harsh thrusts, “I want you to stuff me full of your cum, too- please, Daddy, wanna be your little c-cumdumpster.”

“There you go..”, Kyoutani’s plump lips stretch into a big smile as his cock throbs at the sound of that one forbidden little word he’s come to love even more after hearing it from you only a handful of times.

He didn’t hesitate to tell you about how much it turns him on around two weeks after the two fo you had started dating and even though he never really expected you to use it, he was secretely hoping for you to overcome your shyness.

You had used it only twice before when the pleasure had gotten too much for your brain to handle and Kyoutani knew you’d stop holding yourself back as soon as you got a taste of his cock.

“What did you just call me, pretty girl?”, he cooes, giggling softly at the way you whimper and cry even harder, knowing oh so well what he wants to hear.

And for the first time you just can’t get yourself to argue with the little voice in the back of your head; the feeling of his cock stretching your tiny cunt making it so, so easy to just let go of all those doubts and worries.

“Please, Daddy”, you reply and look into his eyes, groping your own tits as you arch your back to feel him even deeper inside of you, “n-need your cum inside of me...please- want everyone to know who I belong to.”

You don’t really expect it, yet your pussy almost instantly start clenching around his cock when kyoutani harshly grabs your face, making you part your lips before he spits into your mouth.

The loud, lewd sound of it rings in your ears in the best way possible and acting like a literal aphrodisiac in combination with the delicious taste of his saliva coating the hot muscle of your tongue.

You hum softly before you swallow it all, a gentle sob escaing your lips before you look up at him again.

"Now go on, angel girl”, he growls, pushing his hand in between your legs to rub circles into your hardened clit, “I want you to cum for me. Be a good little dumpster for your Daddy and show me what only I can do to you.”

You can barely process his words, the lewdness just fueling the fire in the pit of your stomach as you lose yourself in the feeling of your upcoming high. But you still start nodding, cringing at the feeling your saliva dripping down your jawline.

And with one last thrust, you feel your high crashing down onto you with such heaviness, you're left absolutely breathless.

Your whole body is trembling as the waves of your orgasm hit you, a row of incoherent words leaving your lips before you stop trying and just start crying for your precious Daddy.

"That's my baby”, is the first thing your brain manages to process again, everything still a blurry mess and when you look at Kyou, you realize you’re still cumming.

Your cunt is almost painfully spasming around his big cock, your juices dripping down the sides of his length as he helps you ride out your orgasm.

“You’re such a good, good girl for Daddy, aren’t you? I'm so proud of you", Kyoutani praises you, his thrust a little sloppier than before and from the way he's digging his fingers into the skin of your waist, you can only assume that he's also quiet close, "you're also going to take all of Daddy’s cum, right, baby? We gotta make sure I fill you up nicely..."

You take a deep breath, your slightly overstimulated cunt sending shivers down your spine as your eyes focus on Kyoutani's parted lips.

"Please, Daddy...need you to fill me up with your cum", you encourage him and when you slowly push two of your fingers into his mouth, knowing how much he loves to suck on them no matter what situation you’re both in, you finally get to see his whole face crunch up in pleasure.

His body tenses up as his grip on your waist becomes firmer before he starts cumming inside of you with a deep, raspy moan; coating the walls in several shades of white with three thick spurts of his cum.

Kyoutani buries his face in the crook of your neck as he slowly calms down, loud breathing and rushed gasps for air the only thing to fill the inside of his empty room.

"I love you so much", he whispers and gives you a soft kiss, his cock still firmly buried inside of your sensitive cunt before he shoots you a soft smile; looking almost boyish with his glossy eyes and flushed cheeks.

"I love you, too, D-Daddy”, you whisper, gulping harshly as the words leave your lips, feeling yourself grow even smaller underneath his strong yet comforting gaze, “thank you for giving us a chance", you add and pull him into for another kiss.

"Kyoutani Kentarou, your favorite group of walking disappointments is back and better than ev - oh", Iwaizumi Hajime, Kyoutani's High School best friend, fellow tattoo aritst and roommate suddenly yells and almost brutally slams open the door, startling you to the last bone in your body.

Kyoutani is quick to cover you up with his body, his hand reaching for one of the blankets on the floor as he grunts in annoyance.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know–", "What is it, Iwa-Chan? Is he jerking off again? Kyoutani Kentarou you little piece of shit, just go and fuck that–", just like Iwaizumi, Oikawa – who also happens to be his best friend, felow tattoo artist and roommate – comes to stand in the doorway, bumping into his best friend before he finally spots the two of you.

"You're naked", he points out, closing his eyes almost instantly after realizing what he has just come to witness and despite the disgusting feeling of wanting to disappear and never come back again, you can't help but giggle at their shocked and slightly disgusted faces.

Kyoutani takes a deep breath and pulls out of you, still making sure to hide you behind his body before he hands you the blanket and lets his eyes shift to the door, looking at his best friends in pure disbelief.

"Kawa stop fucking staring and – can you two please fuck off?", he yells, pulling the boys back to reality and the way both of them shift to look at you only to blush from their necks to their ears has you chuckling softly.

This type of situation is nothing you’re not used to – unfortunately.

"Uhm – of course! Oh, my fucking God! So sorry, Kyou", Iwaizumi stutters and wraps his fingers around the doorknob, avoiding your eyes as much as he can before he pushes Oikawa away and then closes the door with another row of apologies.

Kyoutani just looks at you apologetically as he shakes his head and face palms himself, making the both of you burst into loud laughter.

And after taking a shower together and actually eating some late dinner with the boys, you fall asleep with Kyoutani's arms tightly wrapped around your waist, his face buried inside the crook of your neck and one last love confession.

And when those sweet words fall past his lips yet again, you realize – you're finally home.

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favoniuscodex · 3 years

Text

the art of modernity [ prologue ]

prologue - jueyun karst

pairing: xiao x gn!reader warnings: canon-typical violence mention words: ~1.8k words fic masterlist [ prev ] - [ next ]

chapter summary: you drag four of your closest friends to jueyun karst to chase after possible traces of the adepti. none of them expect for you to actually find any, but hey, anything is possible, right?

a/n: can't believe 'making xiao eat a chicken nugget and french fries' is becoming an actual fic but here we are. enjoy !! :D

when you had asked yanfei the legal repercussions of disrupting jueyun karst, the entire brunch table had looked at you as if you had grown a third eye. kaeya had sat down the third mimosa he had been nursing, while childe had actually stopped speaking for once. yanfei giggled with intrigue and keqing had stared at you with an expression that screamed are you serious right now?

yet somehow, you had ended up in keqing's overcrowded car and made a road trip to fuel your farfetched dreams. sure, like any kid growing up, you had read percy jackson and the archons, but, unlike most kids, you had taken the myths of the archons seriously. shrines and ruins still sung praises of their names, but most liyuean mythology was treated as having no greater value than old folk tales. the world had moved on past the need of teyvat's expansive pantheon of the elemental archons, visions, and celestia, yet some scholars sought to prove the existence of the old gods. most of the time, their efforts were fruitless.

you, of course, were no scholar. you were simply a dumbass who graduated college and decided in their post-college/pre-settled life panic to go traverse the treacherous lands of jueyun karst. as prosperous as liyue was, jueyun karst still remained heavily untouched as there were areas that even rich moguls were scared to get their grubby hands on. why turn the beautiful mountains and swirling lakes into sprawling shopping centers if the entire area was rumored to be cursed anyways? so, the country had turned jueyun karst into a protected area in the form of a national park.

but now, with your car full of three and a half dumbasses (keqing certainly doesn't count and yanfei is only halfway to idiocy), you had decided to certainly ignore the title of protected area. you had full intentions of disrupting whatever you could get your grimy hands on. you wanted to see the adepti in action and, if others called you crazy for it, then so be it.

"gods, where even are we?" kaeya asks. his tone lacks the annoyance you would expect from childe nor the worried-yet-still-composed nature you would expect from keqing's words. so, you shrug him off with a simple wave of your hand.

"not really sure, but there's enough of us out here that we won't die, right?" you ask and kaeya stares at you blankly before turning to look behind the two of you at the three stragglers.

"keqing!" he calls, realizing that you are of no help. "where are we?"

keqing huffs as she approaches the two of you while yanfei and childe stagger behind her, both acting tired despite being some of the most athletic people you know. in typical keqing fashion, she reaches into her pocket and pulls out a compass. kaeya stares as the compass needle spins around aimlessly in her hand, its connection clearly disrupted by some force in the area.

"oh gods, what does that mean? we're going to die. we're going to die out here," childe deadpans, panic creeping into his voice. yanfei swats him playfully on the arm before he can begin his usual theatrics, knowing full and well how childe loves living in the spotlight.

"dying in a protected national park is illegal," yanfei adds and kaeya stares at her with a baffled expression.

"what? are the police going to arrest a corpse?" kaeya asks incredulously and yanfei folds her arms over her chest, staring at him with narrowed eyes.

"didn't you want to be a cop at one point? shouldn't you be aware as to how arresting procedures work?" yanfei asks and kaeya recoils at her question.

"no, i was considering going into military like my dad. i don't wanna be a cop," kaeya shoots back and childe jokingly gags once he hears the word 'military'.

"military? yuck," childe says and becomes the next recipient to receive childe's incredulous gaze.

"didn't you literally join the fatui for two years?" kaeya asks but childe shakes his head.

"not like you have any proof," the ginger-haired man shoots back.

"i can easily acquire proof?" kaeya says, but keqing clears her throat loudly before the two men can engage in a full showdown of words.

"c'mon, guys, we have bigger problems to solve than childe's blatant lies," keqing redirects the conversation with ease but not before kaeya lets out a triumphant hmph at keqing's words. "like figuring out why this compass isn't working and figuring out how to get back because it doesn't work."

"ooh, maybe it's not working because there are ghosts nearby," childe says, but before yanfei and kaeya can engage with his dumbassery once more, you interject.

"it's likely just elemental energy or adeptal energy. i know you guys probably don't believe in them, but this is said to be the former realm of the adepti. wouldn't be surprised if there are traces of them left!" you say, voice far too cheery for the implication of your words. kaeya only shrugs at the suggestion that gods are watching over you as you travel through the park, yanfei only looks intrigued in a nearly-dangerous way, keqing looks nonplussed due to her strong belief that the gods no longer exist, and childe looks absolutely terrified yet is trying to act like he isn't.

"anyways," you continue. "maybe there's a domain!"

"ancient liyuean law forbids unauthorized entrance into domains without proper licensure from the adventurer's guild," yanfei says, as if knowing ancient law is a completely normal activity for a twenty-something-year-old.

"what is a domain?" keqing and kaeya ask at the same time before glancing at each other.

"i'm... not sure. pretty sure they have like... ancient monsters and stuff," you confess and, for the first time today, childe perks up excitedly, eagerly taking a step closer to you.

"monsters? like those uh... hollychirls? whatever they're called? how big do you think they are?" childe asks with an excited glimmer in his eyes.

"weren't you just worried about dying?" keqing asks, but childe ignores her question.

"so like... we're trying to find this domain, right?" childe asks, confused. "what are we looking for?"

"i don't really see why a domain would have adepti traces so we're probably better off looking for something else," you say and yanfei perks up.

"like that?" she asks, pointing off at something glowing faintly orange in the distance. you squint slightly in an attempt to better look at it, but you're unable to distinguish what exactly yanfei as pointing at.

"we might as well go see what that is," keqing says and you're slightly surprised for the purple-haired girl to suggest such a thing, but you figure she's just trying to find a place where her compass actually works. the spinning dial isn't too much of a concern for you since you're in no rush to leave, but the friends you've brought along aren't quite as keen on discovering the secrets of the adepti as you are, so you follow the herd as they begin to move over to the glowing orange light.

the five of you climb down, approaching what soon reveals itself as a stone pillar with a glowing chunk of cor lapis on top. it's certainly nothing new and is probably a protected relic, yet no guards are stationed in front of it. it's almost certainly been discovered before, so why isn't it..?

"oh, isn't this area usually flooded?" yanfei asks and everyone turns to stare at her.

"you've been here before?" keqing asks and you wonder to yourself when these people will stop asking questions and instead keep looking for hints.

"you guys haven't traveled to jueyun karst before?" yanfei asks, confused. "yeah, this area's usually flooded with water. i've never seen that thing before."

if it's usually flooded, then it was likely discovered before, but not relocated, you think to yourself and immediately break out in a sprint towards the cor lapis tower. sure, it was about the height of you, with the cubic chunk on top reaching the height of your head, yet you were more than satisfied with looking at the carvings on the side. childe is the first to catch up with you, using his long legs to match your pace. he sighs as you finally stop and watches as you frantically begin poking and prodding at the pillar.

"are you sure that's a good idea?" he asks, nervously. "what if it's a mechanism or something?"

"what's the worst that could happen?" you ask and childe sputters over his words.

"a lot of things!" childe insists, yet kaeya, keqing, and yanfei's joined arrival interrupts him from making an even bigger fuss.

"try putting your palm flat on the diamond," yanfei suggests and you take a step back. with a steady hand, you lays her palm flat against the side of the pillar, in which a diamond has been engraved onto its surface. around the group of you, the remnants of water begin to glow orange as the pillar emits an even stronger, unnatural glow of energy. the pillar begins to vibrate rapidly and yanfei lets out a small, knowing laugh while the rest of you watch, wide-eyed and confused by the moving pillar.

yet, all that happens is that the cor lapis situated on the top of the pillar falls off, landing on the side of the pillar with a resounding crack. the four of your friends immediately move over to look at the now shattered chunk of cor lapis on the ground, yet you gravitate towards the stone pillar. on the spot where the cor lapis fell, a single name is etched into the stone, as if this pillar is supposed to mark a specific area.

"'xiao'?" you breathe, reading off the word on the pillar.

"what's xi-" kaeya begins, glancing over at you, but before he can finish, a flash of green appears on the opposite side of your friends. your lips part in shock as you watch the deity appear before you. a mask rests on his face and a polearm rests in his hand, yet despite his disguised face, you can sense the anger rolling off his form in waves. his green hair ruffles in the wind as his free hand reaches up to lower his mask. infuriated amber eyes pierce into yours, but the adeptus speaks before you can.

"i am adeptus xiao. how dare you mortals infringe upon jueyun karst and disrupt my land?" xiao seethes and, for once, all five of you are silent as the yaksha points his polearm at you.

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