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kookie-doughs · 3 years

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Y/N L/N AND THE HALFBLOODS

Percy Jackson X Reader

-Y/N L/N met Percy Jackson and everything was now ruined.

CHAPTER 16: Mini Elvis

The war god was waiting for us in the diner parking lot. "Well, well," he said. "You didn't get yourself killed." "You knew it was a trap," Percy hissed. Ares gave me a wicked grin. "Bet that crippled blacksmith was surprised when he netted a couple of stupid kids. You looked good on TV." Taking the shield from Percy I shoved it at him. "You're a jerk." Annabeth and Grover caught their breath. Ares grabbed the shield and spun it in the air like pizza dough. It changed form, melting into a bulletproof vest. He slung it across his back. "See that truck over there?" He pointed to an eighteen-wheeler parked across the street from the diner. "That's your ride. Take you straight to L.A., with one stop in Vegas." The eighteen-wheeler had a sign on the back, which I could read only because it was reverse-printed white on black, a good combination for dyslexia: KINDNESS INTERNATIONAL: HUMANE ZOO TRANSPORT. WARNING: LIVE WILD ANIMALS. Percy said, "You're kidding." Ares snapped his fingers. The back door of the truck unlatched. "Free ride west, punk. Stop complaining. And here's a little something for doing the job." He slung a blue nylon backpack off his handlebars and tossed it to Percy. Inside were fresh clothes for all of us, twenty bucks in cash, a pouch full of golden drachmas, and a bag of Double Stuff Oreos. Percy said, "I don't want your lousy—" "Thank you, Lord Ares," Grover interrupted, giving him his best red-alert warning look. "Thanks a lot." I could see Percy gritting his teeth. It was probably a deadly insult to refuse something from a god, but I also didn't want anything that Ares had touched. Reluctantly, he swung the bag over his shoulder. I looked back at the diner, which had only a couple of customers now. The waitress who'd served us dinner was watching nervously out the window, like she was afraid Ares might hurt us. She dragged the fry cook out from the kitchen to see. She said something to him. He nodded, held up a little disposable camera and snapped a picture of us. Great, I thought. We'll make the papers again tomorrow.

I imagined the headline: TWELVE-YEAR-OLD OUTLAWS BEATS UP DEFENSELESS BIKER. "You owe us one more thing," Percy told Ares, trying to keep my voice level. "You promised me information about our parents." "You sure you can handle the news?" He kick-started his motorcycle. "They're not dead." The ground seemed to spin beneath me. "What do you mean?" "I mean Percy's mom was taken away from the Minotaur before she could die. She was turned into a shower of gold, right? That's metamorphosis. Not death. She's being kept. As for yours, I saw them myself. Upstairs with the big guys. Why do you think you're causing one of the biggest uproar up there? They're refusing to tell who your parent is. No matter how much cut." He smirked. "What...?" Percy and the others must've seen something as they all held me back. "What are they doing to them?" I could feel the ground shake as Percy's grip on me tighten. We'll save them... calm down. Not the hero. Us. So calm down. "Calm down Y/N." Percy whispered. The ground stopped shaking and took a deep breath. "I will make you all kneel." I said. He looked at me confusedly. Then he shrug it off then laughed, "Oh yeah? can't wait, kid." Percy gripped my shoulder. "You're pretty smug, Lord Ares, for a guy who runs from Cupid statues." Behind his sunglasses, fire glowed. I felt a hot wind in my hair. "We'll meet again, Percy Jackson. Next time you're in a fight, watch your back." He revved his Harley, then roared off down Delancy Street. Annabeth said, "That was not smart, Percy." "I don't care." "You don't want a god as your enemy. Especially not that god." "Hey, guys," Grover said. "I hate to interrupt, but ..." He pointed toward the diner. At the register, the last two customers were paying their check, two men in identical black coveralls, with a white logo on their backs that matched the one on the KINDNESS INTERNATIONAL truck. "If we're taking the zoo express," Grover said, "we need to hurry." I didn't like it, but we had no better option. Besides, I'd seen enough of Denver. We ran across the street and climbed in the back of the big rig, closing the doors behind us. The first thing that hit me was the smell. It was like the world's biggest pan of kitty litter. The trailer was dark inside until Percy uncapped Riptide. The blade cast a faint bronze light over a very sad scene. Sitting in a row of filthy metal cages were three of the most pathetic zoo animals I'd ever beheld: a zebra, a male albino lion, and some weird antelope thing I didn't know the name for. Someone had thrown the lion a sack of turnips, which he obviously didn't want to eat. The zebra and the antelope had each gotten a Styrofoam tray of hamburger meat. The zebra's mane was matted with chewing gum, like somebody had been spitting on it in their spare time. The antelope had a stupid silver birthday balloon tied to one of his horns that read OVER THE HILL! Apparently, nobody had wanted to get close enough to the lion to mess with him, but the poor thing was pacing around on soiled blankets, in a space way too small for him, panting from the stuffy heat of the trailer. He had flies buzzing around his pink eyes and his ribs showed through his white fur. "This is kindness?" Grover yelled. "Humane zoo transport?" He probably would've gone right back outside to beat up the truckers with his reed pipes, and we would've helped him, but just then the trucks engine roared to life, the trailer started shaking, and we were forced to sit down or fall down. We huddled in the corner on some mildewed feed sacks, trying to ignore the smell and the heat and the flies. Grover talked to the animals in a series of goat bleats, but they just stared at him sadly. Annabeth was in favor of breaking the cages and freeing them on the spot, but I pointed out it wouldn't do much good until the truck stopped moving. Besides, I had a feeling we might look a lot better to the lion than those turnips. I found a water jug and refilled their bowls, then Percy used Riptide to drag the mismatched food out of their cages. He gave the meat to the lion and the turnips to the zebra and the antelope. Grover calmed the antelope down, while I used my knife to cut the balloon off his horn. Annabeth wanted to cut the gum out of the zebra's mane, too, but we decided that would be too risky with the truck bumping around. We told Grover to promise the animals we'd help them more in the morning, then we settled in for night. Grover curled up on a turnip sack; Annabeth opened our bag of Double Stuff Oreos and nibbled on one halfheartedly; I tried to cheer myself up by concentrating on the fact that we were halfway to Los Angeles. Halfway to our destination. It was only June fourteenth. The solstice wasn't until the twenty-first. We could make it in plenty of time. On the other hand, I had no idea what to expect next. The gods kept toying with me. At least Hephaestus had the decency to be honest about it—he'd put up cameras and advertised me as entertainment. But even when the cameras weren't rolling, I had a feeling my quest was being watched. I was a source of amusement for the gods. And it wasn't helping knowing they're hurting my parents. Here I was risking my life for them and what are they doing? "Hey," Percy cooed, "We'll save them. No matter what. I promised you that." "Okay." Percy pulled me closer until I was resting on him. Annabeth cleared her throat. "Hey, sorry I wasn't much help back at the park... I could've helped getting you guys out... It's just..." She shuddered. "Spiders." "Because of the Arachne story," I guessed. "She got turned into a spider for challenging your mom to a weaving contest, right?" She nodded. "Arachne's children have been taking revenge on the children of Athena ever since. If there's a spider within a mile of me, it'll find me. I hate the creepy little things." "We're a team, remember?" Percy said. "Besides, Grover did the fancy flying. All we did was grab the shield." I thought he was asleep, but he mumbled from the corner, "I was pretty amazing, wasn't I?" Annabeth, Percy and I laughed. She pulled apart an Oreo, handed me and Percy a half each. "In the Iris message... did Luke really say nothing?" I munched my cookie and thought about how to answer. The conversation via rainbow had bothered me all evening. "Luke said you and he go way back. He also said Grover wouldn't fail this time. Nobody would turn into a pine tree." Percy answered. In the dim bronze light of the sword blade, it was hard to read their expressions. Grover let out a mournful bray. "I should've told you the truth from the beginning." His voice trembled. "I thought if you knew what a failure I was, you wouldn't want me along." "You were the satyr who tried to rescue Thalia, the daughter of Zeus." He nodded glumly. "And the other two half-bloods Thalia befriended, the ones who got safely to camp..." Percy looked at Annabeth. "That was you and Luke, wasn't it?" She put down her Oreo, uneaten. "Like you said, Percy, a seven-year-old half-blood wouldn't have made it very far alone. Athena guided me toward help. Thalia was twelve. Luke was fourteen. They'd both run away from home, like me. They were happy to take me with them. They were... amazing monster-fighters, even without training. We traveled north from Virginia without any real plans, fending off monsters for about two weeks before Grover found us." "I was supposed to escort Thalia to camp," he said, sniffling. "Only Thalia. I had strict orders from Chiron: don't do anything that would slow down the rescue. We knew Hades was after her, see, but I couldn't just leave Luke and Annabeth by themselves. I thought... I thought I could lead all three of them to safety. It was my fault the Kindly Ones caught up with us. I froze. I got scared on the way back to camp and took some wrong turns. If I'd just been a little quicker..." "Stop it," Annabeth said. "No one blames you. Thalia didn't blame you either." "She sacrificed herself to save us," he said miserably, "Her death was my fault. The Council of Cloven Elders said so." "Because you wouldn't leave two other half-bloods behind?" Percy said. "That's not fair." "Percy's right," Annabeth said. "I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for you, Grover. Neither would Luke. We don't care what the council says." Grover kept sniffling in the dark. "It's just my luck. I'm the lamest satyr ever, and I find the two most powerful half-bloods of the century, Thalia and Percy." "You're not lame," Annabeth insisted. "You've got more courage than any satyr I've ever met. Name one other who would dare go to the Underworld. I bet Percy is really glad you're here right now." She kicked me in the shin. "Yeah," I said, which I would've done even without the kick. "It's not luck that you found Thalia and Percy, Grover. You've got the biggest heart of any satyr ever. You're a natural searcher. That's why you'll be the one who finds Pan. I mean, you found me despite my scentlessness... is that a word?" Percy muffled a laugh. I heard a deep, satisfied sigh. I waited for Grover to say something, but his breathing only got heavier. When the sound turned to snoring, I realized he'd fallen sleep. "How does he do that?" I marveled. "I don't know," Annabeth said. "But that was really a nice thing you told him." "I meant it." We rode in silence for a few miles, bumping around on the feed sacks. The zebra munched a turnip. The lion licked the last of the hamburger meat off his lips and looked at me hopefully. Percy didn't take long to fall asleep. Annabeth rubbed her necklace like she was thinking deep, strategic thoughts. "That pine-tree bead," I said. "Is that from your first year?" She looked. She hadn't realized what she was doing. "Yeah," she said. "Every August, the counselors pick the most important event of the summer, and they paint it on that year's beads. I've got Thalia's pine tree, a Greek trireme on fire, a centaur in a prom dress—now that was a weird summer...." "And the college ring is your father's?" "That's none of your—" She stopped herself. "Yeah. Yeah, it is." "You don't have to tell me." "No... it's okay." She took a shaky breath. "My dad sent it to me folded up in a letter, two summers ago. The ring was, like, his main keepsake from Athena. He wouldn't have gotten through his doctoral program at Harvard without her.... That's a long story. Anyway, he said he wanted me to have it. He apologized for being a jerk, said he loved me and missed me. He wanted me to come home and live with him." "That doesn't sound so bad." "Yeah, well... the problem was, I believed him. I tried to go home for that school year, but my stepmom was the same as ever. She didn't want her kids put in danger by living with a freak. Monsters attacked. We argued. Monsters attacked. We argued. I didn't even make it through winter break. I called Chiron and came right back to Camp Half-Blood." She wouldn't meet my eyes. "Please. I'm not into self-inflicted pain." "You shouldn't give up," I told her. "You should write him a letter or something." "Thanks for the advice," she said coldly, "but my father's made his choice about who he wants to live with." We passed another few miles of silence. "Luke actually told me about you two coming to camp already." "Really?" She looked at me amazed. "You two must've gotten close fast." "Well, I don't know. I feel like I had to talk to Luke. Like I had to be there for him. The same with Percy." We have to be there for both "You're not wrong. I'm not sure how I'd be without your help." Percy yawned. "Yeah, I wouldn't have been able to handle him." Annabeth glared at him. I laughed, "I think you two are cute." Both of them blushed and said some excuse to disprove me. Which then turned into them showing off who's better than who. "If I'm dating anyone it'll be Y/N!" Both of them huffed and glared at each other. I shook my head and smiled. At least I've gotten new friends out of this. "So," Percy trailed off. "If the gods fight," he said, "will things line up the way they did with the Trojan War? Will it be Athena versus Poseidon?" Annabeth put her head against the backpack Ares had given us, and closed her eyes. "I don't know what my mom will do. I just know I'll fight next to you." "Why?" "Because Y/N will and whether I like it or not you're my friend, Seaweed Brain. Any more stupid questions?" "That's all Mr. Peabody." "Shut up, Droopy." I felt her rest on my shoulder and she fell asleep. "Am I that comfortable?" "Yeah," Percy laughed as he rested on my lap. I had trouble following their example, with Grover snoring and an albino lion staring hungrily at me, but eventually I closed my eyes. ~~~ I woke with a start. I was second one awake. Grover was talking to the antelope. "Morning?" "Everyone had the Y/N privilege except me?" "You fell asleep first." I stroked both Annabeth and Percy's hair, which unfortunately woke up Annabeth. "Sorry about that." "It's fine." She yawned. She brought out some Oreo and handed me one. Until the truck stopped. "They're checking the animals aren't they?" Annabeth froze. I shook Percy's shoulder. "The truck's stopped," I said. "We think they're coming to check on the animals." "Hide!" Annabeth hissed. She had it easy. She just put on her magic cap and disappeared. Grover, Percy and I had to dive behind feed sacks and hope we looked like turnips. The trailer doors creaked open. Sunlight and heat poured in. "Man!" one of the truckers said, waving his hand in front of his ugly nose. "I wish I hauled appliances." He climbed inside and poured some water from a jug into the animals' dishes. "You hot, big boy?" he asked the lion, then splashed the rest of the bucket right in the lion's face. The lion roared in indignation. "Yeah, yeah, yeah," the man said. Next to me, under the turnip sacks, Grover tensed. For a peace-loving herbivore, he looked downright murderous. The trucker threw the antelope a squashed-looking Happy Meal bag. He smirked at the zebra. "How ya doin', Stripes? Least we'll be getting rid of you this stop. You like magic shows? You're gonna love this one. They're gonna saw you in half!" The zebra, wild-eyed with fear, looked straight at us. There was a loud knock, knock, knock on the side of the trailer. The trucker inside with us yelled, "What do you want, Eddie?" A voice outside—it must've been Eddie's—shouted back, "Maurice? What'd ya say?" "What are you banging for?" Knock, knock, knock. Outside, Eddie yelled, "What banging?" Our guy Maurice rolled his eyes and went back outside, cursing at Eddie for being an idiot. A second later, Annabeth appeared next to me. She must've done the banging to get Maurice out of the trailer. She said, "This transport business can't be legal." "No kidding," Grover said. He paused, as if listening. "The lion says these guys are animal smugglers!" "We've got to free them!" Grover said. He and Annabeth both looked at Percy, waiting for his say. "Percy, open the lock." I snapped at his face. Outside, Eddie and Maurice were still yelling at each other, but I knew they'd be coming inside to torment the animals again any minute. He grabbed Riptide and slashed the lock off the zebra's cage. The zebra burst out. It turned to Percy and bowed. Grover held up his hands and said something to the zebra in goat talk, like a blessing. Just as Maurice was poking his head back inside to check out the noise, the zebra leaped over him and into the street. There was yelling and screaming and cars honking. We rushed to the doors of the trailer in time to see the zebra galloping down a wide boulevard lined with hotels and casinos and neon signs. We'd just released a zebra in Las Vegas. Maurice and Eddie ran after it, with a few policemen running after them, shouting, "Hey! You need a permit for that!" "Now would be a good time to leave," Annabeth said. "The other animals first," Grover said. I cut the locks with my knife which wasn't as easy as what Percy had done. Grover raised his hands and spoke the same goat-blessing he'd used for the zebra. "Good luck," I told the animals. The antelope and the lion burst out of their cages and went off together into the streets. Some tourists screamed. Most just backed off and took pictures, probably thinking it was some kind of stunt by one of the casinos. "Will the animals be okay?" I asked Grover. "I mean, the desert and all—" "Don't worry," he said. "I placed a satyr's sanctuary on them." "Meaning?" "Meaning they'll reach the wild safely," he said. "They'll find water, food, shade, whatever they need until they find a safe place to live." "Why can't you place a blessing like that on us?" I asked. "It only works on wild animals." "So it would only affect Percy," Annabeth reasoned. "Hey!" He protested. "Kidding," she said. "Come on. Let's get out of this filthy truck." We stumbled out into the desert afternoon. It was a hundred and ten degrees, easy, and we must've looked like deep-fried vagrants, but everybody was too interested in the wild animals to pay us much attention. We passed the Monte Carlo and the MGM. We passed pyramids, a pirate ship, and the Statue of Liberty, which was a pretty small replica, but still made me homesick. I wasn't sure what we were looking for. Maybe just a place to get out of the heat for a few minutes, find a sandwich and a glass of lemonade, make a new plan for getting west. We must have taken a wrong turn, because we found ourselves at a dead end, standing in front of the Lotus Hotel and Casino. The entrance was a huge neon flower, the petals lighting up and blinking. No one was going in or out, but the glittering chrome doors were open, spilling out air-conditioning that smelled like flowers—lotus blossom, maybe. I'd never smelled one, so I wasn't sure. The doorman smiled at us. "Hey, kids. You look tired. You want to come in and sit down?" I'd learned to be suspicious, the last week or so. I figured anybody might be a monster or a god. But my knife wasn't glowing so... I figured. Besides, I was so relieved to hear somebody who sounded sympathetic that I nodded and said we'd love to come in. Inside, we took one look around, and Grover said, "Whoa." The whole lobby was a giant game room. And I'm not talking about cheesy old Pac-Man games or slot machines. There was an indoor waterslide snaking around the glass elevator, which went straight up at least forty floors. There was a climbing wall on the side of one building, and an indoor bungee-jumping bridge. There were virtual-reality suits with working laser guns. And hundreds of video games, each one the size of a widescreen TV. Basically, you name it, this place had it. There were a few other kids playing, but not that many. No waiting for any of the games. There were waitresses and snack bars all around, serving every kind of food you can imagine. "Hey!" a bellhop said. At least I guessed he was a bellhop. He wore a white-and-yellow Hawaiian shirt with lotus designs, shorts, and flip-flops. "Welcome to the Lotus Casino. Here's your room key." I stammered, "Um, but..." "No, no," he said, laughing. "The bill's taken care of. No extra charges, no tips. Just go on up to the top floor, loom 4001. If you need anything, like extra bubbles for the hot tub, or skeet targets for the shooting range, or whatever, just call the front desk. Here are your Lotus Cash cards. They work in the restaurants and on all the games and rides." He handed us each a green plastic credit card. I knew there must be some mistake. Obviously he thought we were some millionaire's kids. But I took the card and said, "How much is on here?" His eyebrows knit together. "What do you mean?" "I mean, when does it run out of cash?" He laughed. "Oh, you're making a joke. Hey, that's cool. Enjoy your stay." We took the elevator upstairs and checked out our room. It was a suite with three separate bedrooms and a bar stocked with candy, sodas, and chips. A hotline to room service. Fluffy towels and water beds with feather pillows. A big-screen television with satellite and high-speed Internet. The balcony had its own hot tub, and sure enough, there was a skeet-shooting machine and a shotgun, so you could launch clay pigeons right out over the Las Vegas skyline and plug them with your gun. I didn't see how that could be legal, but I thought it was pretty cool. The view over the Strip and the desert was amazing, though I doubted we'd ever find time to look at the view with a room like this. "Oh, goodness," Annabeth said. "This place is ..." "Sweet," Grover said. "Absolutely sweet." There were clothes in the closet, and they fit me. I frowned, thinking that this was a little strange. I took a shower, which felt awesome after a week of grimy travel. I changed clothes, ate a bag of chips, drank three Cokes, and came out feeling better than I had in a long time. Search and find them Huh? Look for them and warn them I came out of the bedroom and found that Annabeth, Percy and Grover had also showered and changed clothes. Grover was eating potato chips to his heart's content, Percy looked like he was having a headache, while Annabeth cranked up the National Geographic Channel. "Percy you okay?" "Yeah it's just.... All those stations," he told Annabeth, "and she turn on National Geographic." "It's interesting." "I feel good," Grover said. "I love this place." Without his even realizing it, the wings sprouted out of his shoes and lifted him a foot off the ground, then back down again. "So what now?" Annabeth asked. "Sleep?" Percy and I looked at each other and grinned. We both held up our green plastic Lotus Cash cards. "Play time," I said. I couldn't remember the last time I had so much fun. I came from a relatively poor family. Our idea of a splurge was eating out at Burger King and renting a video. A five-star Vegas hotel? Forget it. I spent most of my time playing and... looking for someone I think. I bungee-jumped the lobby five or six times, snowboarded the artificial ski slope, and played virtual-reality laser tag and FBI sharpshooter. I saw Grover a few times, going from game to game. He really liked the reverse hunter thing—where the deer go out and shoot the rednecks. I saw Annabeth playing trivia games and other brainiac stuff. They had this huge 3-D sim game where you build your own city, and you could actually see the holographic buildings rise on the display board. I didn't think much of it, but Annabeth loved it. Percy was playing with Grover. I'm not sure when I first realized something was wrong. Probably, it was when I noticed the guy standing next to me at VR sharpshooters. He was about thirteen, I guess, but his clothes were weird. I thought he was some Elvis impersonator's son. He wore bell-bottom jeans and a red T-shirt with black piping, and his hair was permed and gelled like a New Jersey girl's on homecoming night. When he saw me he gave a smirk and invited me to play a game of sharpshooters together and he said, "Groovy, man. Been here two weeks, and the games keep getting better and better." Groovy? Later, while we were talking, I said something was "sick," and he looked at me kind of startled, as if he'd never heard the word used that way before. He said his name was Darrin, but as soon as I started asking him questions he got bored with me and started to go back to the computer screen. I said, "Hey, Darrin?" "What?" "What year is it?" He frowned at me. "In the game?" "No. In real life." He had to think about it. "1977." "No," I said, getting a little scared. "Really." "Hey, man. Bad vibes. I got a game happening." After that he totally ignored me. I started talking to people, and I found it wasn't easy. They were glued to the TV screen, or the video game, or their food, or whatever. I found a guy who told me it was 1985. Another guy told me it was 1993. They all claimed they hadn't been in here very long, a few days, a few weeks at most. They didn't really know and they didn't care. Then it occurred to me: how long had I been here? It seemed like only a couple of hours, but was it? I then tried to move, but I bumped into a girl. "I'm sorry!" She said. "Hey, no prob." "Oh... uhm... No prob?" "I--- No problem. Say Uh... I kinda lost track of date. What's the year again?" "Huh? It's 1930. Okay, I'm sorry I have to go. I'm looking for someone." Everyone is important in our story "Did you say something?" I go by Y/N L/N, you'll find the one you're looking for at the zombie shooting game. I left her alone and confused. I didn't know why. But I knew now this place is wrong. I tried to remember why we were here. We were going to Los Angeles. We were supposed to find the entrance to the Underworld. My parents... for a scary second, I had trouble remembering their names. I had to save them. I found Percy first. "There's something wrong." We said at the same time. "Years?" He asked. I nodded. We then looked for the others. We found Annabeth still building her city. "Come on," Percy told her. "We've got to get out of here." No response. I shook her. "Annabeth?" She looked up, annoyed. "What? "We need to leave." "Leave? What are you talking about? I've just got the towers—" "This place is a trap." She didn't respond until I shook her again. "What?" "Listen. The Underworld. Our quest!" "Oh, come on, Percy. Just a few more minutes." "Annabeth, there are people here from 1977. Kids who have never aged. You check in, and you stay forever." "So?" she asked. "Can you imagine a better place?" I grabbed her wrist and yanked her away from the game. "Hey!" She screamed and hit me, but nobody else even bothered looking at us. They were too busy. I made her look directly in my eyes. I said, "Spiders. Large, hairy spiders." That jarred her. Her vision cleared. "Oh my gods," she said. "How long have we—" "I don't know, but we've got to find Grover." We went searching, and found him still playing Virtual Deer Hunter. "Grover!" we both shouted. He said, "Die, human! Die, silly polluting nasty person!" "Grover!" He turned the plastic gun on me and started clicking, as if I were just another image from the screen. I looked at Percy, and together we took Grover by the arms and dragged him away. His flying shoes sprang to life and started tugging his legs in the other direction as he shouted, "No! I just got to a new level! No!" The Lotus bellhop hurried up to us. "Well, now, are you ready for your platinum cards?" "We're leaving," I told him. "Such a shame," he said, and I got the feeling that he really meant it, that we'd be breaking his heart if we went. "We just added an entire new floor full of games for platinum-card members." He held out the cards, and I wanted one. I knew that if I took one, I'd never leave. I'd stay here, happy forever, playing games forever, and soon I'd forget my parents, and our quest, and maybe even my own name. I'd be playing virtual rifleman with groovy Disco Darrin forever. Grover reached for the card, but Annabeth yanked back his arm and said, "No, thanks." We walked toward the door, and as we did, the smell of the food and the sounds of the games seemed to get more and more inviting. I thought about our room upstairs. We could just stay the night, sleep in a real bed for once.... Then we burst through the doors of the Lotus Casino and ran down the sidewalk. It felt like afternoon, about the same time of day we'd gone into the casino, but something was wrong. The weather had completely changed. It was stormy, with heat lightning flashing out in the desert. I ran to the nearest newspaper stand and read the year first. Thank the gods, it was the same year it had been when we went in. Then I noticed the date: June twentieth. We had been in the Lotus Casino for five days. We had only one day left until the summer solstice. One day to complete our quest.

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percyjacksonfan3 · 3 years

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The Last Olympian Thoughts

So because I have absolutely 0 self-control or restraint when it comes to this series and its characters, and for The Last Olympian in particular, I could not put TLO down. Because of this I figured I couldn’t do the usual photo reaction posts I have been so far, because the spam would just be ridiculous, so I am stealing the idea from @yourstrulytaaay to do a masterpost instead. (Adding a Read More cause this got ridiculously long)

Fun fact, TLO came out right after i finished reading the series for the first time so it's the first PJO book i bought and my only hard cover one for the og series. I checked the year and turns out it was published 2009, which means i was actually 9 when i read the series for the first time. I realize this is not really a fun fact but i thought i was older when I first read the series so it's blowing my mind a little ‘cause now I’m 21 and everything hits different and i still have so much love for this series and the characters Okay onto book thoughts: - i was right that this book is gonna destroy me, the first line alone made me so excited and nostalgic it's ridiculous - I love Rachel and Percy sm tbh. Her being a bit of peace and normalcy in his life without always reminding Percy of who and what he is is so good for him. Just a little escape

- of course by the end of the book that's not the case any more but by the end he's lived his prophecy so he doesn't need it as badly, plus he and Annabeth are solid again - Percy saying Annabeth has been hard to be around lately... Ouch my heart. Luke really is the last thing that keeps them from being together and Percy is so jealous and Annabeth so torn and in pain, i feel so bad for them both

- Beckendorf 🥺🥺 - the telkhine with the Lil Demon lunchbox!! I forgot about him. Percy: 'i left him alive, partly because his lunchbox was cool' is one of my absolute favourite lines tbh - Paul taking Percy crabbing and being imperative in helping Percy kill the giant crab 💖 Paul Blofis is important and deserves the world, okay? - aw Percy, you can't save every demigod bb

- 'i had to fight him eventually. Why not now?... What difference would a week make?' Oh Percy you have no idea - real talk tho, the fact Kronos possessed Luke's body would also mess me tf up. Percy keeps forgetting it's not Luke anymore and yeah, that would be so so hard and confusing af, like what another smart little mind game for Kronos to pull on top of everything else - the fact Percy fights Kronos before getting the Achilles Curse and actually doesn't die within seconds is... Astounding. He kicks him in the chest! And yeah Kronos is weaker and still adjusting to Luke's body, but Percy is having trouble fighting Luke cause they used to be friends - Percy breaks Kronos' time magic!! Like?! Boy is POWERFUL.

- OUCH - honestly Luke, Thalia and Annabeth's family breaking the way it did... Don't talk to me. Poor Annabeth, Luke betrayed them, Thalia joined the Hunters because of Luke's betrayal so she's pretty much AWOL all the time and then Luke dies. Like Rick wtf, my heart can't take it? -Percy and Tyson having each others backs when talking to Poseidon in the underwater palace is the brother-brother relationship we love to see - Percy trying to stick a sand dollar in the vending machines at school 🤦🏻‍♀🤦🏻‍♀ - the whole underwater interaction at Poseidon's palace? Perfection. Awkward family drama and all - Connor falling out of the tree when he sees Percy because he's so excited 😂😂

- 😭💖

- k, ik Clarisse isn't perfect but tbh if i was a child of Ares whose father was disrespected and hated by my fellow campers (ares deserves it but still) and that disrespect trickled down to how the other campers treated ME (which if Percy is reliable here, it obviously does) then i would also be irritated at being used for muscle and nothing else? And just expected to fight with the people who act as if they'd rather not have Ares kids around the rest of the time. Like Clarisse isn't totally wrong - Percy reading the prophecy, seeing he's meant to die and just being like 'i do not see it' and refusing to outright think about it makes me so sad for him - (but it taints every action after and he's super reckless afterwards bc of it- including finally breaking and accepting the Achilles Curse) - (also him taking this as the last straw and finally beginning to show Annabeth how he really feels, cause fuck it, he's dying anyway) - Give me more info about Rachel's backstory and family Rick!! - how did i forget Percy willingly eats chocolates that taste like cardboard because 'i didnt have anything against cardboard' like sir? Ik Silena didn't want them but still? - 'she'd always been cute, but she was starting to be seriously beautiful' STOP, MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT - Percy staring at Annabeth and forgetting what they're talking about cause hes so distracted 👌🏻

- hmm yeah... For some strange reason.... - i forgot how Percy totally bombs this convo bw them and now want to cry 😭 Annabeth is trying to talk about what's important and Percy, you sweet oblivious man, you're shooting her down without even realizing - love that they're both on the same wavelength tho. Percy two lines before, hmm it's cool to date ppl from other cabins, wonder why im thinking that around Annabeth, my best friend in the world, and then Annabeth a beat later, hmm, let me bring up Silena and Beckendorf and how it's important to be with the people you love when you have the chance, no way Percy will miss this huge hint right? - they're the best - k i honestly forgot Percy full on physically intimidates Leneus like that - luke telling his mom if he ran away the monsters wouldnt get her..i can just imagine luke crying when he says good bye before running away because he thinks it's his fault his mom is like that and he cant take care of and protect her anymore because it's too hard - uh oh now i have angsty pre-lightning thief luke fic inspo... Him, Thalia and Annabeth on the run... The ANGST - Rick holds absolutely nothing back in this book and i am in pain - HESTIA!! 💖💖🥰 - actual loml - i love that Rick titled this book after her and that he wrote such a great series about the importance of family (biological, found or otherwise) and home, and that he said actually Hestia is the most important bc shes the most humble and keeps the peace and knows when to fight and when to yield and you protect what you love, which is your home - i just... Adore Hestia - Grover! Missed you babes - Hades is so so horrible to Nico, always comparing him to Bianca :/ - but i do love Hades, Persephone and Demeter together they make me laugh - oh god the River Styx - Achilles 🥺 - Annabeth being Percy's lifeline is, and continues to be, A Lot™ - 'my name was Percy Jackson. I reached up and took Annabeth's hand.' LOL Why am i crying? - Like the fact there is no Percy without Annabeth, and that remembering her literally reminded him of who he is in his very soul... It's fine im fine - i won't even get into the parallels of her being his lifeline now and then later when Hera takes his memories but leaves the memory of Annabeth for Percy to fight to get back to (anyone who wants to yell about it with me... Feel free to message) - badass Percy is my fav Percy tbh - him defeating Hades?? Like? Hades is arguably the most powerful god, okay - i feel bad for Nico but if i was Percy I'd do the exact same, Nico, sorry man but this is a high stakes time crunch deal and Nico is literally the only hope of persuading Hades and distracted by his own internal stuff - flashbacks to Luke, Thalia and Annabeth hurt, ow - George and Martha are the best - damn i forgot Hermes full on nearly kills Percy here, yikes - Luke stop cockblocking Percabeth challenge

- i love!! Percy's love for New York!! So much!! - Percy leaving to live in New Rome in HoO is a lie and this is all the proof i need for why - the fact the entire last half of the book is the battle and aftermath... Such great buildup and pacing. All the tricks and twists and battles in this War of Manhattan? I would not take out a thing, Rick, you legend - of course then the final battle in hoo with the gods is what? Two pages? Ugh, don’t talk to me about my hatred for BoO and HoO - 'no detours you two' is still the cutest thing!!! - THE HUNTERS!! Thalia i missed you - good job Percy, you finally spent your sand dollar - Minotaur!! - 'dont i get a kiss for luck? Its kind of a tradition right?' Percy finds out he's gonna die and is out of fucks to give and honestly I support him - also Michael just standing beside these two while they're flirting like umm 👀 👀 while a monster army marches towards them, nbd - Annabeth taking Ethan's knife meant for Percy!!! Cause she just knows his weak spot without him even telling her! They literally invented love - Feral Percy is so scary omg, i love how well Rick incorporates the Achilles Curse in this novel, with the whole heightened weaknesses and stuff ans the parallels to Achilles arrogance being what killed him and Percy's loyalty, fierceness and protective instinct being his own heightened weakness - the fact that Percy is the one who inadvertantly kills Michael Yew tho, I'll never recover from that - the fact Hades offers Maria di Angelo a golden palace by the Styx like how Poseidon offers Sally a palace under the sea tho. Let's talk about that parallel - the entire talk with Prometheus is so so good - not me picturing young Luke hiding in the closet to get away from his mom when she has an 'episode' -i love callbacks in stories and all of the callbacks to the rest of the series in this book make me very happy (medusa, minotaur, the underworld, Rainbow!! My baby!!, Daedalus and more) - Percy summoning a wholeass hurricane against Hyperion - the Party Ponies! They're so chaotic, i love it - Dionysus! 😁 I can't help it, i love him - Percy absolutely losing it when he sees Sally and Paul asleep in the car 🥺 - Rachel telling Percy he's not the hero screws with him so much :( poor bb - although i really really love how Rick wrote this, it's so refreshing to not have one chosen one save the world, but a combination of people - the drakon, Silena and Clarisse make me cry - the Patrochilles references, im not okay - Annabeth giving up on Luke after hearing what he did to Silena and Percy telling her that doesn't make him happy 😭 that whole interaction makes my heart ache - Percy giving Hestia Pandora's pithos 🥺 - and Hades, Nico and the others coming for a final attack is so badass, i love it - listen im glad the og trio were the ones to confront Luke on Olympus but the fact Thalia got so close and then pinned by a statue of HERA makes me so sad. Ik her and Luke were finished and she coped by cutting him off completely and giving up all hope but i would pay money to know what they would have said to each other to say goodbye - Ethan 🥺 - Poseidon joining the fight against Typhon is so cool, such a great scene - 'PEANUT BUTTER!' - Annabeth you brilliant badass you - RIP Luke, you werent great but you werent the worst either - the gods just rolling up seconds too late, wondering wtf happened in Olympus and who the dead body is - the chapter where the Olympians meet and give out rewards is one of my absolute favourites (again i am incensed we didn't get anything like this in HoO) - will Percy turning down immortality ever not make me scream in glee? No? Alright then - Annabeth being relieved like Percy was relieved at the end of Titan's Curse tho - oh Hermes :/ - its so hard reading all this and knowing what comes in HoO... Like it's such a cathartic, earned and mostly happy and peaceful ending and then HoO comes along and undermines it all - aww Rick let Paul see Olympus somehow pls, he deserves it, he killed a dracanae - (i would also love to see it) - Percy being more upset Rachel took his pegasus than her going to Camp and possibly dying, lol, priorities dude - i honestly think that Rick had other ideas for the second Great Prophecy and how things would go down in BoO, cause the prophecy like... Barely applies to BoO, Doors of Death are in book four, and explabations of it is all so unclear when Rick is usually pretty good with that stuff - PERCABETH - lol Percy complaining about privacy when he and Annabeth are caught kissing literally in the middle of the very open and public dining pavilion, okay - BEST UNDERWATER KISS OF ALL TIME - that's it and im a glass case of emotion - very happy to say that this series remains my favourite of all time 💖

If anyone ever wants to come gush about anything Riordanverse related feel free, because as you can see I have a lot of thoughts about it all

#lau rereads pjo #the last olympian is my favourite book for a REASON #honestly every line is killer #so much subtext to read into #the dialogue #the relationships are dialed up to 11 #every character is so on point #the battle strategies too? are just so interesting?#I just adore it #Tay don't read any of this yet cause it's all spoilers #alright I'm gonna go write fic to express these feelings now #tlo #the last olympian #pjo #pjato #percy jackson

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bewaretheidesofmarchyall · 3 years

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Hey, i really like minecraft and used to watch mcyt's back when i was younger. I was wondering if you could maybe guide me into the dream smp series. I have no idea where to start or what people are partaking in it. It seems so active rn and you seem to be invested in the plotlines and such so i thought maybe you can help me?

Okay!

The Dream SMP: A History

Warnings for drugs, the selling of drugs, drinking, war, death, explosions, and human/fish relationships

So, once upon a time, there was a Minecraft server.

It didn't have much of a plot or drama, everyone was just kind of playing the game

Then Wilbur showed up.

An important thing to remember about this server: It’s all Wilbur’s fault, except when it’s Dream’s.

Anyway, Wilbur decided to start a Minecraft drug empire (re: potions) out of a hto dog van (I did not misspell that. It’s called the hto dog van).

But they all lived in Dream’s server (Dream is the main Ruler/God/Inconceivable Green Dude of the SMP) and under Dream’s rule.

He interfered with their “drug” business, so Wilbur did the only logical thing: Declared independence and formed his own nation to sell more “drugs”!

The nation was called L’Manburg, but Dream wasn’t a fan of any of this

And so the Revolution began!!

Part One: The Disc Wars

The main players were Wilbur (the most theater kid of them all), Tommy (The closest thing to a shonen protagonist this thing has), Tubbo (sunshine personified, likes bees, can lie though), and Eret (fuck Eret /j) (In all seriousness, they're awesome)

It was a hard battle.

Dream had way more people. The revolutionaries were outgunned, outmanned, outnumbered, and out planned. And that was before Eret betrayed them.

Eret killed off all of their fellow revolutionaries in exchange for Dream giving them a kingdom.

All seemed lost (Tommy even tried to duel Dream despite being 16 and not the best at combat. He got killed quickly.)

Tommy hadn’t really cared about the revolution in the beginning, but at the end he gave up his most prized possessions (his music discs) to get Dream to leave them alone.

And L’Manburg was an independent nation!

Everyone celebrated in the ways they knew best

In Wilbur’s case, that was sleeping with a fish (yes. a fish. it was a salmon, if that clears anything up) named Sally and having a son: Fundy, furry extraordinaire!

Somehow the middle ground between Salmon and Human is Fox, as Fundy is an anthropomorphic fox.

He was the first person born in L’Manburg, and it seemed like there was to be peace throughout the land once more.

Take one flying guess who screwed that up.

Part Two: The Election

If you guessed Wilbur, we have a winner!

He decided that he needed to win an election to rule the country, and ran as POG 2020, or Wilbur for President.

But he wasn’t unopposed.

Enter Quackity (yes, this is the guy Trump vague tweeted), wanting power but being chill about it, as usual. He decided to throw his beanie into the political ring as Quackity 2020.

It seemed like an easy race, since Wilbur had liberated the nation and Quackity was just Some Guy at this point.

Then, Fundy and Nikki decided to run as Coconut 2020 in a third party bid for the presidency.

THEN, when Schlatt (senile old goat, the corrupt businessman archetype, often drunk) came up to the stage to endorse a candidate, he instead rambled into the mic that he was running for president too.

Like the senile old man they all thought he was.

Little did they know.

Wilbur still could have easily won this election. He was popular and everything. Then, he made a decision.

(Wilbur didn't need to do this, but like all tragic heroes and/or theater kids, he had hubris and was going to make it Everyone's Problem)

He went up to Quackity and suggested that they combine their votes. Quackity wasn't going to win either way, but this way he'd get to be vice president.

Quackity saw that it made sense, but decided that he wanted to be petty that day, and decided to combine votes with Schlatt instead.

And then the votes were counted

Team Coconut came in fourth because they cheated

Team Schlatt came in third because no one wanted the drunken, senile goat to be president

Team Quackity came in second

And Team Wilbur won in a landslide, taking 45% of the votes!

Tommy ran out of the video to tell his mom they won. And then Wilbur revealed the deal Quackity and Schlatt struck.

Quackity+Schlatt got 46% of the votes. Schlatt was president of L’Manburg.

Schlatt immediately takes the podium and starts giving a dramatic speech that sounds less Senile Goat more Dangerous Dictator Goat. He orders that Team Wilbur leave the nation of L'Manburg Manburg (he renamed the country) under threat of death.

Part Three: The Festival

Team Wilbur became Pogtopia, Schlatt and crew became Manburg, and L'Manburg became a nostalgic dream.

The Pogtopians hope to reclaim their nation, and get this absolute madman on their team.

The dude spent a year just farming potatoes to beat someone in a contest. He regularly quotes The Art Of War. He's a die-hard anarchist.

Behold: Technoblade.

So Manburg is a dictatorship at this point in the tale, and Pogtopia is trying its best.

They have Technoblade, Tommy, Wilbur, probably someone I'm forgetting, and Tubbo.

Tubbo is their spy on the inside (so is Fundy, but he hasn't even told Pogtopia he's spying for them, so he's regarded as a traitor)

Then the Festival rolls around

Wilbur has been spiraling, and having a little corruption arc because of course the theater kid decides to kin Hamlet (or is it Macbeth in this situation?)

A day before the festival, he reveals that he's planning on blowing up L'Manburg, because if he can't have it no one can.

The festival comes around, and surprise! Tubbo is publicly executed in front of a crowd!

Schlatt figured out he was a traitor, so he ordered that Techno execute him.

Techno did, but because he was peer pressured.

Then Techno killed pretty much everyone at the festival with fireworks!

Wilbur tried to blow up the place, but lost the button to detonate the TNT (Side note: The TNT was given to him by Dream. Because of course.)

Part Four: The Revolution 2 (Electric Boogaloo)

By the time the true war for L’Manburg rolls around, next to no one is on Schlatt’s side.

Quackity betrays him, Fundy betrays him, even Eret is back on the side of Pogtopia.

The war went by fast, and Schlatt was surrounded by former allies and enemies alike.

Schlatt had a heart attack before anyone could actually kill him, and died as pathetically as he’d lived. Anti-climactic, but everyone was happy.

Wilbur declared Tommy, our protagonist, president.

Tommy declined the presidency, saying that he needed to search for his discs first. He declared Wilbur president of L’Manburg once more.

Wilbur declined the presidency and declared Tubbo president

Tubbo accepted and gave a lovely speech

And then it all goes to shit. "Surely not all of it?" Yeah. All of it.

Wilbur (yes. it was wilbur.) explodes L’Manburg, finally pressing the button to destroy his nation despite his dad trying to stop him.

His own father, Philza, kills him

Stabs the Wilbur

Everyone panicks

And that's when Techno decided it was Chaos Time.

He stands on the ashes of L'Manburg, and said that no government will be allowed to rise in the entire SMP. Tommy objects, and Techno gives this speech:

do you think you’re a hero, tommy?

the thing about this world tommy, is that good things don’t happen to heroes. let me tell you a story, tommy. a story about a man called theseus. his country—well his city-state technically—was in danger. and he sent himself forward into enemy lines. he slayed the minotaur and saved his city.

and you know what they did to him, tommy?

they exiled him. he died in disgrace, despised by his people. that’s what happens to heroes, tommy. the greeks knew the score. but if you want to be a hero, tommy. that’s fine.

do you want to be a hero tommy?

THEN DIE LIKE ONE.

And then he spawns two withers (one of which is named Subscribe To Technoblade) and all hell breaks loose.

Part Five: The Aftermath (aka Where Are They Now?)

Since then, Tubbo has been trying to rebuild L’Manburg. It’s a canal town now, and it looks lovely. He’s a good President.

Tommy isn’t the best Vice President, but once he stops banning people from the country he should be good.

Nikki has left the fox Wilbur gave her in Pogtopia.

Speaking of abandoned foxes, Fundy’s dealing with the death/betrayal of his dad, as well as not getting on that well with the others. He’s also engaged to Dream.

Yes, you read that right. Dream and Fundy are getting married. Fundy met their eldritch overlord on what was pretty much a blind date, and they just clicked.

Eret is adopting Fundy! She has no kingdom any more, but she’s recovered some honor and now has a son.

Philza is dealing with the fact that he killed his son, and may try to resurrect him.

Schlatt is still dead (but is he really gone?)

Quackity is....doing some worrisome things, getting vague tweeted at by Trump, ate Schlatt’s heart, and might be possessed by him??

Technoblade is still doing his own thing, I think

And Wilbur? Wilbur is an amnesiac ghost, blocking out the memories of when he was hurt or a bad person.

There’s way more to say on the subject of the Dream SMP, but this is the basics! Hope this helped!

#long post #dream smp #mcyt

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blackaquokat · 5 years

Text

I SAW THE LIGHTNING THIEF MUSICAL ON SUNDAY

Okay, so first off, the stuff that stood out to me, and then after the highlights, THE STORY OF A LIFETIME INVOLVING A CAST MEMBER THAT HAPPENED BEFORE THE SHOW EVEN STARTED

This is going to be very long, strap in.

***Spoilers Under the Cut***

--Chris McCarrell, indeed, slides out to the edge of the stage and sits like, “Paint me like one of your French Girls, audience” for a full moment before singing.

--For a cast of SEVEN people, all of their voices fill that stage SO WELL.

--I’d only ever heard the soundtrack, but in the show (this time, anyway) Percy says he stopped Nancy Bobofit from “setting the first graders on fire” instead of preventing wedgies and it was just as if not more hilarious because his delivery was just totally stiff terror in the face of Mrs. Dodds.

--HE ACTED SO DEVASTATED WHEN HE THOUGHT MR BRUNNER THOUGHT HE WAS TROUBLE AFTER HE GOT EXPELLED, LIKE, HE LOOKED LIKE HE WAS ABOUT TO CRY, HIS VOICE SHOOK, MY BOOOOOII

--When Smelly Gabe appears, Percy not only covers his face with his shirt but also SPRAYS ACTUAL AIR FRESHENER behind the bastard’s back, I was on the FLOOR

--Chris mimics the body language of an awkward twelve year old so well. Fiddling with his jacket, looking down, awkward motions with his hands, he nailed it.

--SALLY IS STILL THE BEST MOM EVER AND THE MUSICAL CAPTURES HER STRENGTH AND LOVE AND AGENCY SO WELL, SHE TOTALLY GETS GABE TO BACK OFF OF PERCY AND IT’S GLORIOUS

--”Percy was attacked by a fury!” “What? Grover, YOU’RE THE FURRY!”

--Just before his mom is “crushed” by the Minotaur, Percy said, “Mom?” shakily and I was freaking SHOOK, MY FEELINGS

--During the first Dream Sequence, Poseidon comes down with the GOOFIEST grin and hands off the seashell. There’s this long, hilarious silence before he says. “It’s a seashell.” The audience couldn’t stop laughing up until Percy said, several beats later, “Like I said. Weird.”

--MR. D SHARPENING A PENCIL IN KATIE GARDNER’S FACE AFTER HER RANT ABOUT TREE RIGHTS

--During the entirety of Another Terrible Day, Percy is just standing in the back, slack-jawed, in a “What the Hell have I walked into” look

--Chiron does this hilarious dancy step with his feet to mimic the clip-clopping of horse steps and every time it got a laugh.

--In the books, Luke is described as the Hot Boy of the Camp, that half the demigods are in love with him, and honestly, it’s one of the reasons I think James Hayden Rodriguez is perfect because you take one look at him and you’re like, “Yeah, I can see everyone falling in love with this guy in no time flat,” because aside from being REALLY attractive (like, damn boi, you’ve got amazing arms and face and just a LOT going for you) he’s so damn sweet and you want to trust and I DON’T THINK I EVER WANTED CANON TO CHANGE SO BADLY FOR HIM UNTIL THE MUSICAL CAME OUT

--Okay, so seeing Luke portrayed in this show made me care SO MUCH MORE about him than I did reading the books, which is a very strange feeling for me, ngl. His adorable interactions with Percy and Annabeth made me SO EMOTIONAL I MEAN

--Like, when Annabeth acts all suspicious about Percy, Luke is there to validate her skills and tease her and she teases him right back, like, you can definitely see she “likes” him and it could be interpreted that he feels something for her too, and he had such chemistry with Percy too, was endlessly supportive up until, you know, the end (I...may or may not be on board with this Tragic OT3, FRICK)

--OH ON THAT NOTE, when Grover finds Percy after the Minotaur, he’s all, “I’m sorry, Percy, I’m the worst Satyr Guardian ever” and Percy just HUGS HIM, “GROVER, I’m SO GLAD YOU’RE HERE” LIKE MY TWO BOIS I MISSED THEM

--”Grover, are you ever going to wear pants again?” followed by a gleeful “NOPE!!”

--Clarisse’s first two entrances involved this loud fighting yell before her song started

--Percy’s first time with his sword in Camp and he freaking made lightsaber noises when he swung, I read about it but I was NOT PREPARED, it was the cutest damn thing

--I was equally unprepared when Annabeth walked up behind him and when he turned and saw her and yelled out, “MY DREAM GIRL!!” Long beat of silence while the audience laughs their asses off, and he follows it up with, “I mean...you were the girl...in my dream...earlier...”

--When Percy says, “I love girls,” when Annabeth calls him out on assuming her dad was where she got her Godly heritage, Luke gives him the BIGGEST side-eye, it was adorable and Percy did his best to recover, but alas, he is but an awkward noodle.

--”Luke, Hermes kids are fast--” “Actually, that’s a stereotype--” I MEAN

--Percy sitting on the toilet and rolling it across the stage with his feet after the fight sequence, my God, what a visual.

--CHAPTER TITLE DROP, LUKE CALLS PERCY THE SUPREME LORD OF THE BATHROOM

--The Campfire Song was just amazing, everyone’s familiar body language with each other, Luke and Annabeth, Luke and Percy, Grover’s adorable little dance during his bit, everyone comforting him when he starts crying, everyone agreeing that “Chiron wins” in the shitty dad department, everyone’s sympathetic horror with every bad story they all tell,

--after Silena’s bit about how her mom “steals her mascara and all of her dates” she says to Katie, “She’s why I cry,” my sister and I can’t stop talking about how much we related to that moment (not about our mom, but more about our other relatives)

--When Percy is claimed, you can see the horror on everyone’s faces, but he doesn’t, and he’s like, “I’m...the son of the Sea God. That is so COOOOOL!!!” Then he realizes he just squealed like an anime girl and tries to recover by posing and saying to Luke next to him, “Hey,” in a very Miles Morales-from-Spiderverse kind of voice.

--The dread on Luke’s face whenever he interacts with Percy from here on out, by the way, hurts me so much. You can tell every time he talks with Percy that he really doesn’t want to manipulate him, doesn’t want to do this, but he does, and even before the reveal, you can see how unsure and guilty he feels, even if Percy is totally clueless, like even when Percy agrees to go to the Underworld you see he’s THIS CLOSE to maybe trying to talk Percy out of it again and when Grover hops in to join the quest, there’s another layer of Luke going, “Oh no, not Grover too, shit, no!” and I SWEAR, JAMES HAYDEN RODRIGUEZ, IF THIS TURNS INTO A SHOW, YOU’RE THE ONLY LUKE I WANT

-- Mr. D: “WE’RE NOT TALKING ABOUT SOME TIN FOIL PROP THAT YOU’D FIND IN A BROADWAY MUSICAL”

--Percy yells for Mr. D to eat his pants in Latin. It’s amazing.

--Chiron: ”You must talk to” *everyone looks at the ceiling* “Our mummy.” Percy: “...when you say ‘mummy,’ you mean old-person slang for Mom, right?”

--Percy, in the most ‘I am so done’ voice ever: ”You’re expelling me? Again?!”

--This is turning into an appreciation post for Rodriguez, but for real, after Good Kid (which gave me ALL THE FEELS just like when I first heard it on the soundtrack), Luke goes to him with this nervous but genuine grin and laugh, like, “Hey, so when you’re the son of the Sea God, and you want to be left alone, maybe don’t go to the lake? It’s the first place anyone will look.” And they have this real sweet moment where Percy confides in Luke, and Luke validates his anger with the gods and says, “I’m not saying you owe them anything BUT” and if you’ve read the books or already listened to the show, you KNOW how this turns out but you see how SINCERE Luke is about Percy’s pain and his own pain and how much he obviously is already regretting that he has to manipulate Percy into going to the Underworld and DAMN IT CANON

-- Clarisse: ”Don’t get eaten by monsters!” Chiron: *claps hand over Clarisse’s mouth* “Have a great quest!”

--The immediate Squad Energy that Percy, Annabeth, and Grover embody right before the act break, what LEGENDS

--Act II opens up in the middle of Mrs. Dodds attacking the bus. Percy: “I LIKED YOU BETTER AS A MATH TEACHTER!!”

--Mrs. Dodds: ”PREPARE FOR ETERNAL SUFFERING!!” Percy: “I’M SUFFERING NOW!!”

--Cheerful Stoner Stranger from the bus just before the bus explodes into confetti: “Not my weirdest experience on a Greyhound!”

--I knew the show was low-budget going in, but I at least thought the squirrel would be a puppet not a freaking figurine that Sarah Beth Pfeifer sat next to in plain sight to voice, I was dying

--On that note, Annabeth visibly holds back laughter at Percy’s “that’s kinda nuts” joke, these idiot CUTIES

--Grover is the only one who catches onto Medusa, who is played by Chiron’s actor in DRAG, but not even in a funny way, it’s played straight (not that Medusa wasn’t hilarious, but that fact that it was a drag role wasn’t mocked at all)

--Annabeth starting to explain why Medusa hates her and muffling her words by drinking her bottle while Percy and Grover are NOT impressed

--Annabeth teaching Percy how to hold a sword better because this adorable dumbass just twirled the damn thing into his shoulder because he forgot it was sharp

--MY GRAND PLAN, MY GOD and intersecting it with Annabeth saying, “When boys screw up, Percy, they get a second chance” Like, this show pulled no punches, and then afterwards when he’s sending Medusa’s head to Olympus and signs Annabeth’s name next to his and she’s like, “WAIT NO STOP” and the “Impertinent” interaction that not only is in the books but also comes back at the end of the show HELL YEAH

--DRIVE. WAS AMAZING. It was my mom’s favorite on the soundtrack and it still is (although now Bring on the Monsters competes as her favorite)

--YOU CAN HEAR LUKE AGAIN WITH HIS HESITATION ABOUT SACRIFICING PERCY DURING THE STRANGEST DREAM REPRISE

--Grover: “Percy, you almost woke everyone up. Well, not Annabeth.” Annabeth, in her sleep: “Mom...you remembered my birthday...” WILL THESE DEADBEAT GODS VISIT THEIR KIDS, I SWEAR---

--OKAY SO TREE ON THE HILL, LEMME TELL YOU

--On the second level, you see Annabeth, Luke, and Thalia re-enacting the scene while Grover narrates at the bottom and not only does Jorrel Javier look SERIOUSLY emotional and on the verge of tears for the whole thing, but at the top when Thalia is re-enacting her death, LUKE GOES TO REACH FOR THALIA TO SAVE HER AND ANNABETH PULLS HIM BACK AND THEN THEY JUST HUG EACH OTHER SO TIGHTLY BECAUSE THEY DON’T WANT TO WATCH THALIA DIE AND THEN THEY STAND BEHIND THALIA AND REACH OUT THEIR ARMS TO SYMBOLIZE HER TURNING INTO THE TREE AND YA’LL I SHIT YOU NOT I ALMOST BURST INTO REALLY LOUD SOBBING I WAS NOT OKAY

--They did the Bathtub Story from the book. Every second that passed I was more in love with the show.

--Charon: ”Ya’ll wanna hear my song?” *choruses of refusals* “SORRY I CAN’T HEAR YOU OVER THIS SWEET ASS RIFF!!”

--DOA is just as much of a bop in person as it is on the soundtrack.

--OKAY SO, Percy is almost yanked into Tartarus with his winged shoes and the mood is like, SUPER SERIOUS, as they all realize he almost fell into the pit and when Annabeth says, “I think that’s Tartarus,” Percy says, in this confused but still scared and serious soft voice, “You mean like the fish sauce?” and just. Annabeth and Grover both. Annabeth looks at him like, “THIS is the idiot I’m going to fall in love with over the next four books,” while Grover just Facepalms so much he shoves his glasses up his forehead and shakes his head, another RELATABLE MOMENT that my sister and I won’t shut up about

--Hades. I just...there’s nothing else I can say, but Ryan Knowles, Sarah Beth Pfeifer, Jorrel Javier, Jalynn Steele, and James Hayden Rodriguez deserve about fifty Tonys for all the roles they do in this show, for real

--SON OF POSEIDON, WHAT A HYPE SONG, AND ALL THE TOILET PAPER DURING THE LAST NOTE IT WAS GLORIOUS IT COVERED HALF THE FLOOR AUDIENCE

--My Poseidon and Sally feels have returned with a vengeance. That Miles Morales moment with Percy that I mentioned earlier? Poseidon does the same thing when he sees Sally, and the two of them are just Vibing it up while Percy is between them like, “THIS IS SO WEIRD”

--As Poseidon leaves, he turns away from Sally and makes this fist bump gesture like, “Hell yeah, best time of my life was this woman right here”

--Percy, after Poseidon exits: “So that’s my dad?” Sally, in a very horny tone: “THAT’S your dad.” Like, GET IT, Sally

--Sally: “Oh, what is this package, Percy?” Percy, with a shit-eating grin: “Oh, it’s a...DIY Statue Kit” *Sally goes to open it* “WAIT NO DON’T IT’S MEDUSA’S HEAD!!” and the Grossed Out Look on her face as she exits the stage. Priceless.

--Luke is Very Obviously avoiding Percy when they return to camp. More on this later because My. Feels.

--Annabeth: “Hey Clarisse! We met your dad! He’s not as tough as you are!” Clarisse: “Hey, get back here! You saw my dad!” *slightly vulnerable voice* “Did he ask about me?” YOU DUMBASS GODS, TALK TO YOUR DAMN KIDS WILL YOU???

--Annabeth and Percy grinning like idiots over Sally’s Medusified statue of Gabe, what cuties, I love that their romance wasn’t forced in the show, it was handled so gracefully because they are Twelve and in the Very Early Stages of their Undying Love for each other (and Luke, I promise you guys, all three of these idiots are in love with each other and it hurts me so much)

--OKAY SO PERCY RUNS UP TO LUKE CLEARLY EXPECTING TO BE COMFORTED AND TO SLIP INTO THEIR SWEET AND SUPPORTIVE DYNAMIC BUT THEN PLOT AND PAIN AND LAST DAY OF SUMMER HIT ME THE HARDEST ON THE SOUNDTRACK BESIDES TREE ON THE HILL AND IT DIDN’T DISAPPOINT

--And the hardest part? The way Rodriguez plays Luke, you really CAN’T be angry with him. I mean, there’s no justifying his actions because it’s freaking KRONOS, but given that we’ve been given the time to see what a great guy he was, how much he cared about the campers, how many he must have seen never come back from quests the Gods gave them, who feel abandoned by their parents, Luke’s own quest, how he watched Thalia die with little to no intervention from the Gods, how he must hate to see Annabeth killing herself to prove her worth to the Gods for a quest that could get her killed, and then Percy coming in after losing his mom and sympathizing with his justifiable bitterness towards the Gods, the show doesn’t shy away from the fact that the Gods are effed up and you just can’t blame Luke at ALL for how he feels about the Gods, but it makes everything hurt all the more.

--The Most Millenial/Gen Z ending ever, “We didn’t ask for this, we shouldn’t be the ones fighting this war, but if we don’t, we all die, so fine, we don’t want to do this, but no one else will, so here we are, ready to fight” and then Bring on the Monsters which is one of the best closing numbers to a show ever, I swear.

--All in all, the critics can suck it, this show has more heart and love and hilarity and depth than half the stuff on Broadway and the fact that it’s going to have such a short run is a Crime.

--I sincerely hope they can do another one, if at all possible. I would go watch it too if it’s made by the same creative team and the same actors (maybe even more actors).

OKAY NOW FOR MY STORY!!!!!!

So I had paid leave to use up, hence our trip to NYC last weekend, and we stayed in a hotel really close to the theatre. My sister and I, having been fans of the books for half our lives, were wearing Camp Half-Blood t-shirts. Anyway, we were so excited that we got there an hour and ten minutes early, and they weren’t letting anyone in for another half hour, so we decided to take a few pictures and go get a snack.

While we’re taking pictures, suddenly behind us my sister and I hear “TAKE ANOTHER ONE!!” so I turn around thinking What the hell and then have the biggest Brain Glitch of my life because it’s CHRIS FREAKING MCCARRELL WITH A COFFEE/SMOOTHIE THING AND A MUFFIN STANDING BEHIND US AS IF HE WAS JUST LA-DEE-DA-ING ALONG TO THE THEATRE AND DECIDED HE WANTED TO GIVE AN INNOCENT FAN A HEART ATTACK, because he could have just gone in and we wouldn’t have even noticed but NOPE HE CAME RIGHT UP TO US, AND I’M STILL IN SHOCK, NGL.

My gut reaction was to hug him and then I apologized because I hadn’t asked his permission and didn’t want to be That Person who didn’t respect boundaries (I am a very tactile, hugging kind of person and have to remind myself that not everyone is the same way, especially with performers) and he said I was fine and not to worry. My sister and I got a few pictures together with him and he asked if we were seeing the show that night, and we were, and he looked so pumped, and I got to tell him that I read Percy Jackson before Harry Potter and that it was my favorite book series and when he asked if I had listened to the soundtrack, My mom said yes, multiple times, but fondly, and he looked so excited that we were so excited to go that night.

So yeah. That happened.

And then after the show, we managed to catch Kristen Stokes on her way out, but we waited until she got to talk with and sign playbills for kids (there were so many kids in the theatre, it was adorable, even if the ones behind us kept crinkling their snack wrappers consistently during THE WHOLE SHOW which got annoying, ngl). My sister and I took a few with her and I got to tell her, also, that this was my favorite book series growing up and that she played Annabeth, a big role model for me, absolutely perfectly and she looked so touched.

(Also, she was much shorter than me. I forget that even if I’m one of the shorter members of my family, I’m still pretty tall by usual standards.)

Anyway, WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE, PJO FANS, AM I RIGHT????

...I wanna see the show again, but idk what the chances of that happening are. If you haven’t seen it and have the ability to, I must encourage you to GO. PLEASE. GO SEE IT.

#the lightning thief musical #tlt musical #percy jackson and the olympians #rick riordan #kat rants #chris mccarrell #kristen stokes

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sukunas-play-thing · 4 years

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I jus have to ask. Do you have an OC for my hero academia???? What's their name/ life like? I wanna get inside your head and know what u got in-store for us all. Plllllssssssssssss my amazing person.

Oh my gosh yes I do anon bean. She's still in the making. When I first wrote her she was a mere cross over oc. And I am trying to keep it in universe canon so had to scrap everything I had written.

Her name is Selim Unfrid.

Selim is the name from Arabic meaning "safe" and "undamaged". The name unfrid is an Norman family name of Viking origin name meaning "the one who gives peace"

Norman family name is spelled as onfroy, onfroi. Unfrid is Scandinavian origin.

I kept her fathers origin. He's known as the beast hero: Minotaur

He legit turns into this Badass minotaur.

Her mother is a witch whom has a quirk that allows her to control her blood at will in battle. (Similar to Deadman wonderlands Branch of Sin but completely different origin)

Selim inherited her moms witch lifestyle and quirk but has her dads temper and strength.

And as you might have guessed Selims family is from Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿. And has Viking heritage in her family. I haven't decided if I wanted to make her student becoming a hero or a villain quite yet to be in fact.

Originally I thought of her dad being a huge ass but the thought of her having a big burly Scandinavian old man dote and look after his daughter with his booming voice and deep heavy Scot accent just made me melt.

Her dad doesn't believe in relying on quirk alone to get the job done, only to use it against villains with long range attacks or body changing quirks that allow one to change size and or forms. So her father trained her physical strength using a Viking wrestling method called Glima. Glima is the name that covers several types of Nordic folk wrestling practiced as sport and combat. In one common form of glima, players grip their opponent by the waist and attempt to throw them to the ground using technique rather than force. Other variants allow for more aggression.

The key to this technique is to take down the enemy as quick and swiftly as possible. Glima literally means "with a glimpse".

She's very upfront with people and honest. Only a complete dick when the situation calls for it.

She has a license and owns a beat up old red suicide door Chevy truck. And yes her father paid to get it shipped to Japan when they moved from Texas (they moved alot because her father is mostly a humanitarian hero who moves from country to country to expand his hero agency and helps with world epidemics. Such as ending world hunger and helping countries affected by natural disasters and the like. The mans p much the National Guard. )

They lived in Brazil, Norway, Australia, And the US. Her main language is Scottish/Gaelic and is multilingual. Can speak multiple languages such as Spanish, German, Italian, English and Japanese (very little though she struggles alot especially with her heavy Scot accent **don't hate poor baby is trying**

Selim owns a cat

She loves heavy metal and rock music (how she learned English so fast and well while living in Texas. She gained a redneck personality from there. Loves going mudding).

Her favorite food is Haggis.

Haggis is a savoury pudding containing sheep's pluck, minced with onion, oatmeal, suet, spices, and salt, mixed with stock, and cooked while traditionally encased in the animal's stomach though now often in an artificial casing instead.

She does have tattoos. (With her parents permission) she has an Odin tatooine sleeve on her right arm, above his head on her upper arm is yggdrasil (Tree of life) and wrapping around the tree trunk is the serpent Jormungandr. And above her right breast is Odins horns. Also called three horned triskelion.

Loves to read thriller, horror and crime books.

Has a bestie that lives in Brazil. Selim used to be a cheerleader. No not those types you'd see at football games. This gal was aiming for the world championships.

She loves to dance because of it and now can't go a day without dancing. She plans on becoming a professional dancer. She's got so much soul when she dances.

Her favorite band is Slipknot and Blue Stahli. (Never heard? Gotta check em out)

She plays racing games (like need for speed carbon) and RPG pc games.

She so spunky and cares deeply for those she cares about. Calls them her "familia "

Her mom owns her own shop where she makes spells, potions, and hand crafts anything and everything witchy. She even wrote her own handbook on Witchcraft and teaches a class for beginners looking into said craft.

Her mom does palmesrty. And reads tarot cards. Unfortunately she gets those who asks her for readings over the most rediculous things. Momma had to up her prices. She's a very humble women and wants what's best for her daughter. Unfortunately the poor woman worries for her daughter because she takes after her dad way too much.

I love the name Stoick and Volka. The names used for Hiccups parents in How to train your dragon but refrained from using the same names. Their names are still in the making too.

That's all I have for Selim. I went hella overboard writing this post. It just. Omg I'm so happy someone's asked me if I had an OC been wanting to flex on my love of Viking stories and knowledge hope you all love her as much as I do. I have been thinking about giving her a sibling too. Probably will brainstorm that idea later. So sorry... Not many will probably read this lol. Now I'm nervous shit.

🐲Queen Targe🐲

#ask #mel speaks #chat #my hero academia #my hero oc #boku no hero academia #sorta a self insert oc too lol

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castielusive · 5 years

Text

Ray’s Horror, Urban Fantasy, and Standard Fantasy Rec List

Assume all fics are rated explicit unless stated otherwise. WIPs are marked, but few and far between. Updates regularly.

Urban Fantasy:

Title: A Beginner’s Guide to Communing with the Dead by suspiciousflashlight

Word count: 77,159

Summary: Maybe it’s the little girl whose disappearance turned into a murder, and whose murder turned into a cold case, and who has now apparently decided to move in with him. Maybe it’s the unacceptable hole left in his life when his dumb best friend and partner in (the prevention of) crime decided to go and get himself killed. Maybe it’s his brother, whose high-profile career and fantastic girlfriend and first-child-on-the-way are steadily leaving Dean in the dust. Pick one. Pick all of them. The why doesn’t matter so much as the what, and thewhat is this: Dean is pretty sure he’s going completely, certifiably insane. Sure, he hasn’t started wearing all his clothes inside out, and he still showers on a regular basis (anyways, that’s not crazy, just a little eccentric); but there’s no getting around the fact that he just threw away his life, his career, and his reputation by dragging out his mom’s old necromancy book and summoning a Class A Forbidden Entity to his attic. A cranky one, too. With horrendous bed-head.

Yet another stunning product of dcbb. Fed!Dean, urban fantasy.

Title: Convenient Husbands by Annie D

Word count: 5804

Summary: “It’s only temporary, right?” Dean says. “Just until you’re healed up, and then we’ll never have to see each other again. So what do you say, Castiel, do you want to marry me or not?”

Podfic by Tenoko1 here [x]. I’m in love.

Title: Cursed Or Not by Ltleflrt

Word count: 115,223

Summary: While experimenting with magic when he was a kid, Sam accidentally cursed Dean. Now, Dean is forced to wear a spelled amulet constantly, or he’ll turn into a random animal. For a little over a decade, he’s learned to live with the curse, and has even found it useful in some cases, but he sure would be happier without it.

When he meets a witch named Castiel, he’s offered a deal. Instead of assuming all witches are bad, Dean can spend a season getting to know him. If at the end of the season, Dean still thinks he’s evil Castiel will send him away with his memory wiped of the whole experience. But if he learns that Castiel is not the monster Dean assumes he is, he’ll lift Dean’s curse.

It’s an offer Dean can’t bring himself to pass up.

Title: A Different Kind of Magic by K_K_TiBal

Word count: 4,775

Summary: Castiel is a witch that prides himself on his healing spells and Dean is that one customer that keeps coming into his shop with a different illness that needs curing. -Castiel looked up and raised an eyebrow. “Well, Dean, you’ve been cursed.”

Dean’s eyes widened at the buzzword. “Cursed? What do you mean?”

Castiel looked at him sympathetically as he pulled out a small, square bottle. “You either made a witch very angry or made someone that knows a witch very angry.”

[NEW] Title: Lifestyles of the Weird and Sexy by robotsnchicks

Word count: 7,030

Summary: Dean's roommate Castiel is a pretty weird dude. He's also hot as hell and Dean might have a bit of a crush on him.

The problem is Cas might be a witch. And finding out the truth isn't as easy as Dean thought it would be.

Horror:

Title: Autumn Hollow by shotgunsinlace

Word count: 98,374

Summary: When tragedy strikes late one Californian night, author C.J. Novak searches for a place to start his life anew. The long road filled with shadows and doubts take him to Nires Island, a small fishing town off the coast of Maine where the food is good and the neighbors are polite. But when nightmares of drowning threaten the fragile threads of Castiel’s sanity, the picturesque shores of Autumn Hollow don’t look quite so pretty any more. The dead walk, the vengeful haunt, the darkness stalks, and Dean Winchester may be more than just the shady mechanic who somehow manages to destroy Castiel’s defenses.

Read it.

Title: Architecture of the Minotaur’s Heart by beenghosting

Word count: 44913

Summary: There’s something alive in Dean’s cabin. He can feel it. Under the floorboards, beneath the stairs that shouldn’t be there, where it’s dark. It beats like a heart. It changes its face in the middle of the night. It feels like it’s reaching out to him, and he has no idea why.

Gorgeous. Happy ending.

Other:

Title: Kryptonite in Shades of Green and Blue by Annehiggins

Word count: 12,781

Summary: Dean is the only member of the Winchester family without super-powers and has lived with the threat of being used against him all his life. When Dark Angel finally makes threat reality, Dean ends up trapping them together for two months. A lot can happen in two months.

Yes.

Update: Pod fic version here (x). I am in love.

#fic rec #deancas

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dailyarturia · 7 years

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I apologize for bothering you for your objective opinion so much, my king, but once again I need your objective opinion. This time I need your objective opinion on the Berserkers. I'm severely concerned that I have shit taste in Berserkers, and I know that unlike me you are definitely a man of culture.

very large. back from ye olde days where berserkers generally couldn’t actually communicate so unfortunately a bit lacking in complex characterisation compared to others. lovin the whole ‘made to kill his own children in rage which is what qualifies him as berserker in the first place and now gives his all to keep this singular parentless child safe despite supposedly being made into a mindless raging beast’ thing. 8/10

bucket knight. also an old school zerker who can’t talk outside kariya’s fever dreams but he does scream in french sometimes. an overly loyal knight who nonetheless put his own wishes above what he believed were his king’s once and then spent the rest of his life feeling guilty about it to the point where it straight up drove him crazy because he couldn’t understand that arturia has -15 consideration of her own wants. his kink is getting shamed and he would probably get a heart attack if arturia did that hands on her hips disappointed look pose in his general vicinity. 8/10

get OUT of my HOUSE. ugly and horrifying but could totally beat gilgamesh in a fight and the image of ol gregory getting his nuts kicked in by a metal underpants enthusiast is high quality content so he gets points for that. 3/10

this is what we in the scientific community call a daughter. a good girl who just wants to be loved but has severe trust issues after being abandoned by the person who literally created her. can in fact talk but it takes a lot of effort so she doesn’t bother because like, fuck humans right, why should she put in effort to make herself understood when they’re not gonna want to understand her either way. I’m so blessed & grateful that moriarty is her dad now. 9/10

i’ll be honest I still have no idea what his character is supposed to be like its not like he had a lot of screentime in extra and extella is very bad to its side characters. ?/10

the fucking supreme. pandered to like a dozen of my kinks and gave me a few more. my first 5*. the end of my f2p days and the start of my journey to becoming the monster god. the design. the skillset. the teeth. the c l a w s. a king despite hating kings. a machinelike killer despite living for the thrill of the fight. a man who wants to just die already yet obstinately refuses to. a contradictory mess that denounces every ideal he used to live by yet clings to them harder than ever. a monster whose personal arc after being summoned isn’t how he’s still human at heart or whatever but how he was a monster before he looked like one already so like, don’t even worry about it. his mad enhancement is EX(C ) and his material entry revealed that this weird rank is bc it’s not even actual battle rage, he’s just so fucking stubborn it gets classified as mad enhancement. EX/10 the love of my fucking life

the smile of an angel. seems completely rational at first but is still classified as a berserker with EX rank mad enhancement because of her inhuman determination to save as many lives as possible without any regard for the quality of that saved life. she’d amputate all of a person’s limbs in an instant if that’s what it’d take for them to not die. she has canonically beat people to a pulp to ‘cure’ their mental issues. completely dedicated her life to becoming a healing machine at the cost of her own health and even personhood. her profile says she doesn’t actually listen to others but in her myroom lines she takes an active interest in your hobbies and opinions and she also gets flustered when you call her an angel. i literally cannot fucking wait until ch america hits NA server she’s so fucking good and i want everyone to love her. 15/10

THIS IS WHAT A FRIEND LOOKS LIKE. the actual embodiment of “cool guy has a chill day”. a smile that rivals the sun and an attitude that turns even the most ordinary days into a grand adventure. his mad enhancement is basically just that he’s kind of an idiot. 10/10

OX MOM OX MOM OX MOM her mother got knocked up by an ox demon in a dream and had to raise her in secret, and her human father didn’t accept her until she proved to be really strong and even then only as long as she would exterminate anyone who stood in the way of the clan. so scared of being shunned for her demon origins despite being loved & trusted as leader of the minamoto clan that she straight up exorcised her demon self into a separate personality to kill it (& herself with it) and was only barely stopped by the four heavenly kings. nowadays fiercely protective of anyone who knows about & accepts her demonic side to the point of insanity, which is where her EX mad enhancement comes from. a huge crybaby but gets shit done anyway. 10/10

THIS IS ALSO WHAT A FRIEND LOOKS LIKE. someone who was labeled and locked away as something evil due to being what is by all means called a monster even though he’s got a really gentle personality and likes being helpful. really good example of the whole “heroes and villains are nothing more than the roles individual complex people are forced to take on” theme fate likes to play with. has difficulty talking but it’s easy to come to an understanding with him as long as you call him by his personal name asterios rather than the name of the monster minotaur everyone assumed he’d be and he thus inevitably became. 10/10

the only reason he’s a berserker is because his name and the word “berserker” have the same etymology and the grail had no idea what other class to put him. this is the canon reason. he doesn’t have any mad enhancement to speak of beside being a lil hot blooded and liking to fight. literally only here because he likes to throw punches. got his ass beat by li shuwen in ch america because despite loving to throw a punch he’s not actually a martial artist and can’t win from someone with actual technique. a classic ‘jack of all trades master of none’, he literally sucks at being every single class but can’t not be summoned as a heroic spirit because he’s from the oldest english epic poem and a prototype for many other heroes. a free spirited adventurer who takes things as they come but can be responsible when it matters. 9/10

once a good & wise ruler but fell into insanity in the last few years of his rule before finally getting assassinated. loved rome with all his heart for its beauty & splendour but got overwhelmed by the conspiracies and other evils that were also a part of it until the goddess of the moon, who he was in love with, made him insane, which he claims saved him in his bond ce. determined from then on to become the ugliest most evil motherfucker in all of rome so that he could take all the nastiest parts of rome with him in his inevitable death and have his dear cousin nero live in happiness, if only for a while. summoned as a hero despite being very close to an anti-hero because the good ruler he was before going insane responded to a call to save the world and still intent to do his part by simply dragging everything evil down with him. 8/10 wouldn’t it be nice if chapter rome had actually paid attention to roman servants other than nero.

looks like a bratty child but talks like an archaic mob boss. has horns and huge claws. easily bribed with chocolate. has a huge sword but just fucking headbuts her enemies instead. 10/10

many berserkers are angry men but only he is anger man. classified as a berserker not just due to his battlefield conduct but also the insane commitment he had to the laws of the shinsengumi, to the point where he would personally execute former comrades who broke them. both the first and last member of the shinsengumi, a man who dedicated his entire life to upholding its values in a rapidly changing japan. surprisingly rational and during gudaguda 2 okita didn’t even realize he’s a berserker because he didn’t become the fanatic that qualified him to be summoned as one until after okita’s death. one of the coolest skillsets in the game and definitely some of the sickest animations. 10/10

NORMALISE

FINDING

AND KILLING

ACHILLES

10/10

my fuckign girlfriend 10/10

the cutest enabler. 10/10

please god let me meet her. 10/10

when will takeuchi die

#mod post #we rate servants

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vers-1 · 4 years

Text

Ch5&6 lightning theif

I read two chapters today because I was busy studying for my midterm last night. Stats 151 can suck an egg. I would like to hopefully never take that class again.

Percy is in shock. He’s in a cabin eating weird pudding and iced tea that is supposed to taste like something you really like I think. Idk. Later in the chapter I found out it’s called ambrosia and necter. Percy recovers and he is met with Grover trying to wear shoes, but he has hooves and he gives him the Minotaur horn that Percy broke as a souvenir. Grover has a orange shirt that’s says camp half blood. They go to another building and they see mr Brunner and a small baby man with a tiger shirt. They are playing cards. Annabeth is also there, but mr Brunner sends her to make preparations in cabin 11 for Percy. Baby man turns out to be Dionysus the god of wine and he has been grounded by his dad Zeus so now he’s in the camp. Mr D takes Grover and gives him a scolding or something and he is taken away. Mr Brunner is revealed to be Chiron a centaur and he gives Percy a tour. Cabins are assigned by who your god parent is. Some cabins are empty and some have kids in it. The ugly red cabin is filled with rowdy kids. I knew that was an Ares cabin. Percy was sent to the Hermes cabin which was full of kids. Chiron leaves and Annabeth is there to take over the tour. They asked if he was regular or undetermined which I guess means if he belongs there or just passing by. Annabeth tells the kids he is undetermined and they groan. Percy’s spot is some random space on the floor. He doesn’t trust the Hermes kids because their god is the god of travellers and theives. Annabeth peels Percy out of the cabin and scolds him because he said something weird and an Ares kid with 2 others approach them. The main leader was named Clarisse and she just grabbed Percy by the neck and pulled him into a smelly bathroom. She tried to shove his head into a toilet, but the water came up and attacked her and she was hosed down along with her little gang. Annabeth got soaking too, but not washed away like them. Percy was the only dry one. The area gang runs away and Clarisse swears that she’s gonna get him during capture the flag. Annabeth is impressed and wants Percy in her team

I know I said that if I had to pick a God to be my parent it would be Hades, but Clarisse.. um. I remember talking about Nancy and how if I ever met a kid like her I’d grab her by skin of her neck and grand slam her. I thought it was funny that Clarisse also aimed for the neck and pretty much just dragged him by it to the bathroom. I would like to point out that I’m mostly a pasifist and violence shouldn’t always be an answer so some difference there. I’m a bit of a softie so I wouldn’t say that Ares is my godly parent.

Now hold the phone. Hermes is the god of theives and they know this. This is like the biggest foreshadowing. I mean I also saw the movie. By the way the movie starts to stray really early in the book. They are 12 not 16ish, Chiron is supposed to have a white stallion half, Percy upon arriving to camp isn’t placed in a posidon cabin immediately, no one tells him who his parent is, the ares kids exist and are never mentioned in the movie. Also at the end of chapter 6 when Percy hits Clarisse with water gun she is the one that wants to beat up Percy. In the movie Annabeth and Percy have a 1v1 battle, but I think I’m This book it’s gonna be between him and Clarisse. Annabeth even said that she wanted him on her team. I can see why people got frustrated about the movie. In anime it usually follows the manga and sometimes there are differences with the ending like in FMA and parts in Soul eater, but it still follows cannon on the most part. The movie is straying pretty far from the book, not too far tho. It’s like parallel lines. It’s 2 stories with the same direction, but they’re seperated. Similar but not in the same plane kind of thing. Weird

When I was trying to read the 2 chapters I didn’t think I’d be able to do it. Sounds weird right? I thought I’d get bored and just stop after ch5, but the end was interesting and I did skip the day before so I went all the way to chapter 6. The way that ended really made me want to do ch7 too, but I needed to pull back. Save it for later kind of thing. Percy has no field experience unlike the rest of the kids and they’re gonna toss him into a scary cature the flag game. Wild. I would like to see how this goes. In the movie they made him win after fighting Annabeth. I think it would be interesting if in the next chapter when he fights Clarisse that he would lose miserably. He knows he’s got this power that helps him in tight situations, but he doesn’t know how to control it or how it works yet. Something something character development.

I also read the part where Percy saw Annabeth blush at Luke. Okay girl he’s like 19. You’re 12. A sixth grader and some guy going into college. Someone is gonna catch a case. He’s too old for you right now girl. Annabeth is an interesting character she was super curious and had high expectations when Percy came to the camp. She helped rehabilitate him when he was in shock and would stay with him while he slept. She knew about his mom and the fury cause he would sleep talk and how would she hear that? She’s be there when he was sleeping. Her god parent is Athena goddess of knowledge right? So she wants to seek more knowledge or she’s curious by nature? Idk. It’s just weird cause it seemed like she was being nice to him, but when he woke up for real she pointed out how he drools in his sleep. That’s not the friendliest thing to say to someone. She does somewhat have interest/care in him cause she questions why he’s saying these things when the Hermes kids laughed at him. What I’m trying to get at is if she likes him or not. Not in the romantic sense but in the as a person sense. It almost feels like she is just testing him out and sorta seeing how he would react to stuff. I just thought her first initial greeting to him was weird and I thought it was a bit out of character cause she had been nice to him before. I think it will be nice to see who she is as a character while reading the book.

Also poor Grover. He’s 20ish years old and a late bloomer. I feel bad for him cause apparently he was guarding another kid 5 years ago that died. That is rough. He blames himself for Sally’s death too. He just wants to be good at his job and now it seems like he’s being fired. I would like for that not to happen. He’s such a cool guy

#44

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inkwellco · 7 years

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FOCUS ON... JOHN HARLAN KIM

Our latest 'FOCUS ON' feature interview is with Australian actor John Harlan Kim. Kim has journeyed from the familiar sights of Ramsay Street on Neighbours, to become a valued Librarian on the hit TNT show, The Librarians.

Hi John, how’s your visit home been? Unreal! Always good to get home for the Summer and see all my mates and the family. Mom was stoked to have me back but now I'm pretty sure she's getting over it and probably ready for me to head back to the States!

We’ve just seen the season 3 finale of The Librarians. Talk about an emotional rollercoaster. Your character Ezekiel has grown over the years, matured, what’s the journey been like over that time? It's weird. Here's a character I never thought would grow. It was apparent that he suffered from some type of Peter Pan syndrome. But over the seasons we've seen more and more that it's just a guard he has set up and I think people can relate to Ezekiel in that way, that having walls up is a normal human thing to do. He has the most to prove yet he acts like he doesn't care but we're seeing more and more that he truly does care, especially about his new family.

Can you relate to Ezekiel in any way? I've grown up with the show myself so that's probably one of the coolest parts, to not only see Ezekiel grow up and mature with each script but also needing to have to do that myself albeit on a less grander scale because obviously I'm not fighting dragons and minotaurs in my personal life. My problems are a little more realistic like trying to score a date or not over-cooking my eggs.

Has there been an episode that stood out as a favourite? Point of Salvation. Hands down. The cast were so supportive that ep as was Jonathan Frakes and Jeremy Bernstein. They put me in an environment where I felt confident enough to make choices and take creative risks. I think it all came together really well in the end and I couldn’t be prouder.

Tell us about your relationship with the other Librarians. Lindy [Booth] and Christian [Kane] set great examples for me, they’re always there for me (Lindy & Rebecca have even housed me at one stage) and they’re just good people to be around. And with Noah [Wyle], I couldn’t be more amped to work with. He’s phenomenal at what he does and I have a lot of respect for the way he handles the pressure whether as an actor, producer, director or writer. He’s awesome. I really couldn’t be in a better position with the cast I have.

And the dynamic between the Librarians and their Guardian, as well as Jenkins? It’s a great technique, incorporating different roles to cover a variety of plot lines. Rebecca Romijn and John Larroquette make it way too easy to play! They’ve both had long and successful careers in the industry and it was easy to see why from the moment I got to Portland. I love working with them. It’s fun because you’re right, when we have such a wide variety of plot lines to cover splitting up the team becomes necessary to keep on top of it all. Every script I get, it’s exciting! One day I’ll be sitting on a magic council with Larroquette, the next I’ll be beating up zombies along with Romijn!

The episodes are always so unique and interesting, when you first read each script how do you feel? I’d imagine much like the audience, fascinated, but excited as your character experiences it. One of my favorite parts about the whole thing is getting the next episode’s script. The writers on our show are top flight and they do a spectacular job in conveying their vision onto paper and keeping things fresh and interesting! Like I mentioned, you don’t know what you’ll be doing or where your character will get to travel to, all you know for sure is it won’t be boring!

There are some harder themes, for example in season 3 the team deals with the resolution of Cassandra’s tumour. In contrast, what was it like filming those scenes? As a viewer it was tense! To an extent, it definitely felt like a shock to the system! Showing up that day was such a different type of shooting day for us. I wasn’t used to coming in and filming something so somber but being the incredible talent she is, Lindy absolutely killed it!

Were there any other scenes that presented a challenge in terms of emotional response? Like the finale? Yeah I mean Flynn’s ultimate sacrifice was rough. And I had already read what was going to happen and I still got anxious watching it! That and Charlene’s goodbye. Jane Curtin’s a star, I loved having her around.

And what about training for the more physical combat roles, what was that like? Did you enjoy it? Definitely. I got to live out a bit of a youth dream with that vampire ep. And to do it alongside Christian Kane who is well-versed in vampire combat himself. I mean, come on! How lucky am I!? Our stunt guys Tim Eulich and Buster Reeves were a dream to work with and they’re absolute legends as well.

Over the seasons, what’s one of your favourite moments working on the ‘The Librarians’ set? My first day. Noah Wyle and the jewel theft scene. It still feels like a dream, such a surreal moment. I haven’t lost that feeling yet and I hope I never do. I never want to be jaded.

Do you have an idea as to what The Librarians will go through in the upcoming series? What would you like to see happen next, for all the librarians and specifically Ezekiel? Zero idea. They’re good at keeping pretty secretive about all of that stuff. I’d love to see Ezekiel continue to evolve into the Librarian he’s going to be someday. He’s far from being fully-realized and has the most growing up to do so to see him take that next step would be awesome.

The Librarians has been renewed for a fourth season, what do you think makes the series so successful? Our showrunners. John Rogers and now Dean Devlin. They’re the pulse of the show. I don’t really need to say anymore, they’re extraordinary at what they do and they’re two of the best men I’ll ever come across, by every measurement of the word.

Is there any other role you’d like to take on from a book or comic? Or another series you’d also like to be a part of? Amadeus Cho. I’ve always wanted to be a humungous, green giant.

Did you always want to be an actor? I decided at 15 I wanted to be an actor so I took a class, auditioned for my first gig and booked it. I then took that pay check from my first acting gig, coupled that with money saved from working at a charcoal chicken store and flew to New York in my school holidays. I knocked on the door to a film school building in Manhattan and told the concierge I wanted to be an actor and he told me to go find my parents. I think he thought I was lost.

On your down time what other things do you enjoy doing? I love shooting hoops, hitting the water and playing video games. I picked up boxing a few months ago too but my heads so big, it makes it ridiculously hard to dodge punches.

How does working overseas compare to working here at home in Australia? The biggest difference I’ve found is the pacing. I can’t speak for either industry as a whole but my experience on Neighbours was a much more fast-paced environment than something like The Librarians. It was actually a fantastic way to learn to nail your first few takes and within that, I found preparation was key so I make sure to show up to any set now with my lines absolutely ingrained into my brain so that the real fun can begin once you start shooting.

What advice do you have for actors, especially Australians wanting to make it in the industry and overseas? Trust your choices. It’s so easy to second guess if you’re on the right path or not but just back yourself and everything else will fall into place.

And finally, what can we expect from you next? I’m actually in the middle of editing my first project right now so I’m hoping to complete that before we start work on Season 4! Way too excited to see that finished and then to get to go back to work with Dean & the gang is going to be an absolute blast as always!

Thank you so much for your time John. We can’t wait to see you on screen in 2017!

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vohalika · 7 years

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I suffer for my art

For an article appearing on thefandomentals.com, I actually sat down (with a lot of booze) and subjected myself to watching the Lightning Thief movie again. Here are unfiltered live notes, so everyone can suffer with me.

(Why yes I do channel cinema sins. just a little bit)

· The first 10 seconds do away with the one core rule of the franchise; as Poseidon for some reason steps out of a river, a fisherman SEES him. The books avoid this by having a thing called “mist” exist that keeps mortals from seeing ancient greek mythology stuff going on. Unless, of course, that particular fisherman was blessed with clear sight and is destined to be the next oracle. Suck it, Rachel.

· Oh god, Sean Bean is in this movie, and he doesn’t even die. That alone says everything about the quality you need to know.

· Why the fuck are they meeting in mortal forms on the empire state building? Yes, that’s where Olympus is, but Olympus is metaphysically ABOVE the fucking building, not the deck they’re on, which would be crowded at any and all times of day.

· Okay. So they meet here to discuss exposition. Zeus knows Poseidon has a son. Zeus is also to blame for Poseidon never contacting said son. I mean, technically it’s a pact the two of you made with your other brother after he spawned Hitler and a world war happened, but, uh, is that even canon to this movie?

· Okay, Sean Bean establishes the summer solstice as a deadline. Keep that in mind. SUMMER SOLSTICE.

· Why do we put the plot into the first three seconds of the film? Was Columbus afraid we’d fall asleep after this and wouldn’t be able to catch up?

· Okay real talk Logan LErman would have been the perfect Percy about 5 years before this movie was made. He grew up a little too baby faced to still be a good fit for battle hardened don’t fuck with me Percy of the follow up series, but still, such a missed opportunity.

· Okay so Percy regularly hangs out at the bottom of the swimming pool for 7 minutes to think. That’s, ah. Weird. You know. If you do that regularly, people might notice. And Grover, whose job is to keep him safe, and also to technically keep him from realizing he’s not quite human, is encouraging this. Because. Sure. Why not.

· OKAY. SO. They kept the NAME of the school, but not the boarding school aspect. They turned Mrs. Dodds into an English teacher so she could make a joke about the word fury in Othello. And they choose to establish the dyslexia and ADHD thing during dialogue while not actually showing any ADHD symptoms. I can’t quite talk about how well they do with the dyslexia, but from what we see, it’s the letters just fogging over and randomly turning into Greek letters which is not how it is described in the books at all. Seems more like Percy needs glasses here.

· Oh my fucking god. Gabe comes home, sits down in the uncomfortable kitchen chair, demands beer and smacks Sally on the ass, and both Percy and Sally treat him like a rude house guest maybe, not like the abusive asshole he’s actually supposed to be. Percy even stands up to him and thinks it’s necessary to explain that this is his mother and he will not have her sexualized in this kitchen. Gah.

· How can this house both be Gabe’s while at the same time, he never held down a job?

· Also Percy comes into the pretty house at the ground floor and calls for his mother who is like on the third floor. Is that entire house theirs? If so, damn, Gabe is a rich unemployed white trash person.

· Oh and now Poseidon just randomly wanders around New York to stalk his son amazing

· Percy wears headphones during the plot related exposition at the MOA

· At least he’s fidgeting now. That’s progress.

· OKAY. So Ms. Dodds pulls Percy aside in the middle of the lesson, and Grover and Mr. Brunner can totally leave too to help him. They also cut the action sequence but sure, whatever.

· Percy gets weirdly ableist when Grover says he’s his protector. Like, in the books Percy’s objection to that was that Grover was constantly being bullied and Percy had to stand up for him.

· In fact, Percy and Grover could possibly pass for cool kids here; neither of them look like losers. Percy is pretty and has amazing abs. That’s… Completely contrary to how book!Percy feels. Like, he gets better once he reaches the age where boys stop looking like cave trolls, but, uh, that takes a while.

· Then they go home to Sally, Grover downs Gabe, and they run off, and Gabe’s poker buddies just let them be. What.

· They start conversation about the father while the sun is setting in New York City, and only commence it in the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere

· The minotaur who just toppled their car is suddenly all the way up the hill. Wow.

· Sexist edit: In the books, Percy’s mom explains to him how to fight the minotaur. Here, he just kinda figures it out himself.

· Okay. Two dumb things: With the mom evaporated just before the camp gates, why do they fight the minotaur at all? In the books, Percy is half a mile away from the camp when the showdown happens and he fights to save himself and his mom. Here, he just charges out there to avenge his mom even though the magical gate is right there.

· Second: instead of going for his sword, the actual weapon, Percy goes for the horn stuck in the tree, almost getting skewered himself. Now, the narrative for some reason rewards him for this, but this is just dumb. And there was also no indication that the horn was going to work better than the sword, which is also right there and not stuck in a tree.

· The fury roughed him up more than the minotaur did, and yet this is the part where he falls unconscious

· Grover is BUFF

· He’s supposed to be a scrawny loser kid with anxiety issues

· Also nursing Percy is Annabeth’s part. This is important. Ish.

· Yeah, okay, Grover giving Percy the tour is… Unfortunate. In the books, there were actual adults giving him these talks, and also Annabeth, and you get the feeling Satyrs are veeeeery low on the pecking order. Also, Mr Brunner was there to actually take him seriously

· Also, the camp just looks wrong. Way wrong.

· UGH

· UUUUUGH

· OKAY

· We’re introduced to BRUNETTE Annabeth while a bunch of people do badly choreographed battle around her. This is wrong. This is so wrong.

· Annabeth is good in a fight, yeah. But her main asset is her brain. And the first glimpses we get of her is taking care of Percy, both nursing him and giving him the tour, because she piecing together how he fits into a prophecy that concerns her and is her ticket out of there.

· Also they kind of combine her role in this movie with that of Clarisse, who is a daughter of Ares and a bully like the ones Percy never had to face here. I have no idea why they did that, and it’s even more ridiculous since Clarisse appears in the sequel.

· Why did they have to put more than one centaur in here, they’re supposed to be party animals roaming the countryside, EXCEPT for Mr. Brunner who is Chiron fuck everything

· Okay. They also conflated the daughters of Aphrodite with the naiads that are around, and both groups would NEVER give Grover the time of day. Buuut I guess considering where this leads, we do have to play up his sex appeal, huh?

· OKAY. The cabins in the books are actual fancy and pretty houses, befitting Greek gods. Being claimed by a god is also a special thing, and the fact that it is special contributes greatly to the 5 book story arc. Here, they just shove Percy into a weird wooden structure full of sailing paraphernalia specifically built for him.

· Okay so apparently the only danger kids of the big 3 pose is making the other big 3 jealous for some reason, not because they literally kicked off the world wars

· And apparently, Gabe’s smell isn’t supposed to keep monsters away, but the other gods?!

· Well I mean everyone seems to have known about Percy, sooo

· Also Percy has no way to integrate into camp or anything , has no connection to any of these people, anything

· Luke is missing a scar, and is also completely creepy from the get go

· Why do we keep getting meaningful close ups of Annabeth, what is she supposed to mean to anyone at this point

· Why was she fighting with a knife minutes ago and is nnow using a bow and arrow, it’s Athena not Artemis

· This game of cpture the flag is stupid

· And also undercuts Annabeth’s actual point

· In the books this involved like tactics and shit

· But like, I commend the script for making Percy lampshade how ridiculous this all is

· It’s just that capture the flag had a narrative purpose, too, which is null and voide when he was already claimed

· Also Percy is such an idiot for just going for the flag like that

· Annabeth has boob plate

· "My mother is goddess of wisdom and battle strategy. You know what that means?" - IT MEANS YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER THAN TO TAKE OFF YOUR HELMET WHILE FACING AN ENEMY WITH A SWORD.

· AND ALSO YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER THAN TO MONOLOGUE AT AN OPPONENT

· WHAT IS HER BEEF WITH PERCY? Yes, he rudely stared at you for a while, but why do you need to cut him up like that?!

· She just beats him down and nobody does a thing they all just stand around staring what the fuck

· And then everyone cheers when she’s done beating down the completely untrained new kid?! WHAT THE FUCK

· ArE YOU ALL BRAAVOSI WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON

· THERE ARE BLUE FORCES RIGHT BEHIND YOUR FLAG WHY ARE THEY NOT DOING ANYTHING

· Percy, who already knows he’s a son of Poseidon needs to be told by divine intervention to go to the water, the only place he actually liked before

· Brief contact with water then turns him into superman and has him actually sort of beat Annabeth

· Though not as cruelly as she beat him

· And then everyone just lets him walk to the flag. Why the fuck.

· You know who actually figured out how the water powers worked? Annabeth!

· You know who actually made a battle plan to get the flag for the blue team? ANNABETH!

· Gaaaaaaaaaaaaah

· Percy gets party invitations. The fuck.

· Annabeth chases them away and then flirts with him for some reason. Percy is also completely turned on by a public beat down.

· “I definitely have strong feelings for you” whaaaat the fuck. Whaaaaaaat the fuck. This is soooo weird.

· WHERE IS MY FIVE BOOK AWKWARD PUBERTY SLOW BURN

· Oh hello flame demon. How nice of you to just show up like that and deliver the plot to us

· Okay. So. Hades wants the bolt, but outright states that he doesn’t have it. So far, the plans are to talk to one of two enraged gods and convince them he didn’t take the bolt. That’s…Not much of a plan at all unless someone here knows how to cast a zone of truth spell or something

· Hades now comes along and offers his mom in exchange for the bolt, instead of being framed for everything like in the books, and the camp counsellors just… leave Percy alone after that?

· Like, not only Grover, but the random chick who brutally tore into him in front of a crowd figured out he was going to bail without ever receiving a tiny bit of training, guys. This is stupid.

· Annabeth wants a quest. Sweetheart, this is not a quest. There is a protocol to these things, as you would know. A god has to assign it, there has to be a clear objective, and at least according to camp regulations, a prophecy, and the entire thing has to be official. But sure. Tag along with the random unprepared kid who’s going to get his mom.

· OH THAT’S JUST GREAT YEAH Annabeth would not know how to get to the underworld, she has to go ask A MAN for info SOMEONE SHOOT ME

· Luke is in a completely empty cabin with a gaming console and flat screens and pokes fun at the ren faire feel

· Luke, Annabeth has daddy issues completely independent from her godly parent but okay fine

· YEAH LUKE LECTURE US ON GREEK MYTHOLOGY

· NO NOT LIKE THAT

· Okay so my personal interpretation of Persephone is more that of an ancient times beauty and the beast kind of deal, so that she’s not entirely unhappy

· Also like, Greek mythology has a maaaaaajor Madonna/whore complex. Maaaaajor. And while she’s not one of the chastity goddesses, Persephone kiiiinda doesn’t fall in the dedicated adulteress part of that spectrum

· But foreshadowing. I get it.

· Convenient map is convenient

· Super literal soundtrack

· Also they still haven’t told us where the underworld is or how to get in there, just that it’s easy

· “Let’s split up, check everything” Greeaaat plan, Percy. And then just go looking around without actually looking thoroughly

· Now Annabeth is dragged along screaming and Grover actually knows how is greatuncle died and is the one to figure out what’s going on. Great.

· Like, in the books, he still finds his uncle Ferdinand, but no one ever knew what happened to him because he got lost during a search at a place where no one really returns from

· Annabeth is the first one to figure out that the nice woman giving them burgers and asking them to pose for pictures is not their friend and saves both Grover and Percy, and Percy figures out who she is himself immediately after, before the veil comes off and the snakes start hissing

· Oh, Uma Thurman, you are too good for this

· I need to watch Kill Bill after this just to calm down

· It’s weirdly cathartic to fight your own murderous instincts

· CALL ATTENTION TO ANNABETH’S HAIR JUST TO RUB IT IN WHY DON’T YOU

· Annabeth knows this story dammit

· Also villain monologue

· I dunno, Uma, you’re still pretty hot like that

· At least Percy figures out the reflection thing

· Ugh Annabeth has to get rescued

· How can you sense him if you were surprised by his presence before?

· Percy says he can look at her reflection and then throws away the phone he’s using to look at her when he actually sees her

· Where the fuck did they get the car

· How did Annabeth learn to drive at camp

· She can sense him, sees him coming, and he still gets to cut off her head from behind

· And then she conveniently carried around the pearl with her

· DID THIS MOVIE JUST IMPLY PERSEPHONE GOT FREAKY WITH MEDUSA?!

· How do they get a motel room, do they actually have credit cards or something? What the fuck.

· Yeah okay I don’t feel creepy at all looking at Logan Lerman’s naked torso some more

· So I guess Percy’s ocean powers in this movie work like waterbending and can also heal other people

· How he figured that out? No idea. Why he doesn’t start carrying around water everywhere he goes for just this purpose?

· And aaaalso I think the more significant story for the animosity between Athena and Poseidon would be how he fucked Medusa in her temple, but sure. The story about Athens.

· Book!Annabeth, when prompted, brings up both, by the way.

· Why is it forbidden for all gods to interact with their kids?

· DID SHE SAY SALLY UGLIANO?! SALLY JACKSON NEVER TOOK HIS NAME AND THAT IS FUCKING IMPORTANT

· Why is there laundry service in the middle of the night?

· And how did they get to check out after that?

· Yeah okay this Parthenon business is completely not in the books

· “I wonder if she really looks like that” Okay okay cutting out the field trip is fucking stupid

· No one checks the bathrooms before closing up the place?

· And no on turns off the lights in the bathrooms?

· Cleaning staff ruining the day yet again

· Every time Annabeth shoots anything in this movie I die a little on the inside

· Also hey, there are more black people in this movie than Grover and Persephone, and they all work in maintenance

· Ugh, son of Poseidon taking to the air

· Aaaand the maintenance squad has been possessed

· Annabeth gets to point out the obvious, Percy is on fire like it’s no big deal, and Hail Hydra isn’t even a thing yet. At least not in the main stream.

· Flying shoes are now fully attuned and working for him

· Annabeth shoots shit again

· At one point, it is a plot point that children not of Apollo aren’t that good at archery

· And Annabeth in the books fights with a knife, an invisibility cap, and her wits, and never shoots shit

· Medusa petrifies the hydra through fire

· Okay then

· Where do they get their money for food from

· That’s a major obstacle in the books

· The credit cards they totally have?

· And the gas money for that car

· Okay so the underworld is actually visually striking and could have had potential

· Hades is actually vengeful and out to kill the other gods

· Persephone mentions her allotted time away from him, but is still there before the solstice.

· She double crosses Hades because she hates him and shit, it’s weird

· And then she hits on what for all intents and purposes is an underaged boy

· The staredown is sooo unsatisfying and thematically rrelevant

· Luke just conveniently happened to flutter around the empire state building close to midnight because….?

· Does this camp have no security?

· The fight is badly, badly choreographed

· Luke also just has delusions of grandeur and wants to ascend to gdhood or something

· “You’Re no hero” – actually, per definition, he is.

· Also, this fucking lightning bolt is supposed to be more powerful than nuclear bombs, STOP USING IT IDIOTS

· And then Luke just kinda chills on top of the building, waiting for Percy to come and angage him in aerial combat like a video game boss

· Okay if you’re using the lightning bolt, fucking use it

· HOW CAN PERCY’S SWORD REFLECT IT DAMMIT

· No, really, if a celestial bronze sword can do that, what’ so great about it in the first place

· They use this thing like a flashier version of a tazer

· Also, they’re right underneath Olympus, you’d think the gods might actually intervene this close to their home turf

· Luke then uses Percy’s lack of proficiency at aerial combat to suggest he might be no son of Posedong after all… Which I agre with, actually, because Zesu would blast any sons of Poseidon out of the air immediately

· He also effectively reminds Percy of his waterbending powers, so he can make water tanks explode for dramatic final battle poses

· The bolt somehow doesn’t electrocute Luke when caught in a tidal wave

· Water somehow knocks Luke’s shoes off

· Mortals are allowed to go to Olympus

· Ah wait, just to ride the elevator up there

· Athena has a random British accent

· And the gods are arguing, completely oblivious to what’s going on, but also totally prepared for imminent war

· With each other in a council chamber

· Riiight

· Also the movie gave absolutely no reason for Luke to be angry

· Athena and Poseidon are conveniently already standing

· Zeus just like that agrees to bring Grover from the underworld WHICH IS NOT EVEN HIS DOMAIN

· Poseidon gets to talk to Percy and doesn’t even shrink down to do it. They never say why the gods aren’t allowed to talk to their children

· …Gods become human when they spend too much time with mortals? AND THAT’S WHY THEY’RE NOT ALLOWED TO VISIT THEIR CHILDREN?! WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT?!?!!?!?!

· Zeus and Poseidon are RIVALS. Godhood can be BESTOWED. The rational thing to do would have been to let him become human and appoint a new god of the sea loyal to Zeus

· You’d think some tactical minded deity who doesn’t like Poseidon very much would have thought of that

· Sally can just kick out Gabe, just like that

· Chiron is totally into students disobeying. Let word of that get around, and everyone will run away and be eaten by monsters, defeating the entire purpose of the camp

· Gd dammit you kids have no chemistry and with the intense eyes and same hair color look more like siblings

· Making this almost kiss really uncomfortable.

· Also, how is Percy suddenly able to stand up against her clunky pirouette fighting without having stepped into water first?

· Ugh

#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #the lightning thief #I HATE THIS MOVIE

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