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#harry styles is the most direct route to people knowing you exist
larrylimericks · 8 months
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5Sep23
Products change but the method’s alike: Hype new girl on a tailor-made hike, Get Loewe in favor, And Styles’ new fruit of labor? Making green on a rented Lime bike.
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Would you mind elaborating on Don't Worry Darling 👀?
Hi!
I wish I could properly elaborate on that movie, because I have been thinking about it quite a bit, but I still get the sensation that there's some idea about it that is escaping me.
Tumblr mostly focused on the batshit stuff going behind the scenes, and honestly, who wouldn't, and clearly a huge part of the mess the end product is is tied to that.
The things I mentioned in my review of Glass Onion have to do with
DWD feels like a clumsy rehash of The Stepford Wives. Which is an extremely well known novel with two very well known adaptations. But you get this sense that DWD is pretending that TSW doesn't exist. Both Knives Out and Glass Onion treat the works they are referencing (mainly tropes from Agatha Christie) with... referentiality. More "Rich people ;) all shut up together on a trip of pleasure ;) and there's murder ;)" and less "Rich people??? all shut up together on a trip of pleasure???? and there's a murder??? in the mediterranean??? exciting and new!" Even the part that is supposedly new is, apparently, accidental: when Shia Lebouf was on the role of Jack, he was some sort of creepy janitor kidnapping a woman he didn't know. When Harry Styles took on the role, apparently for optics, they went for the route of his being her husband and his misogynistic behavior, benign-y in his concern for her being overworked. Which leads to
The villains in the story: Jake and the boss that is a thinly veiled attack on Jordan Peterson.
(rather 2.1, I really hate the new post editor) I honestly think that there is room for a TSW-adjacent story that addresses the specific subtype of "benign" control-objectification that this movie accidentally stumbles upon; the men in TSW love their wives as an extension of themselves; love them as something that is useful, and so they don't feel a loss at all in turning them into robots. But there's a brand of it that presents itself as being meant for the good of women; a stay at home mom is a woman liberated from the shackles of capitalism, protected from stress and harrassment, liberated from having to make hard decisions because she is subordinated to her husband, finally in her natural environment. It is a view I have seen more and more in Catholic circles, but that feels anthropologically Lutheran in a way. Catholicism has a long history of nuns and sisters making their own way in the world, organizing and ruling themselves, not having biological children, managing businesses (ultimately a monastery that makes food, candles, vestments, drinks, etc, requires being managed with an eye to its continued existence) and professions (as teachers and nurses and such). I digress. I think there's a general tendency to objectification in romantic relationships, that because it isn't sexual in nature, often goes under radar; I remember reading this article about how people, in dating, most often search for a person who can make them happy (that is, someone that fills a checklist of characteristics, like a phone or another product) rather than searching for a person they can be happy with (someone that shares the same basic ideals and life goals. And I think a whole lot of the time the "homestead 1950s nuclear family with a stay at home mom and a bunch of kids" mishmash fantasy is an exaggerated version of that. "I want a wife that will stay at home, I want 12 children, I want... I want... I want... specs for a product and a plan that spins around the self. That¡s interesting to explore! But that's not something DWD does anything with.
(2.2) Then there's the Jordan Peterson villain. I haven't ever really sat down to make my own firm opinion on him. My gut feeling is that he's overrated in both directions. Beyond the caricature portrayal of a guy that is EVIL just because HE HATES WOMEN and ALWAYS SPEAKS IN GIBBERISH... it's a wasted opportunity for talking about cults, why some people create cults and why others fall into cults. The movie attempts to make of Project Victory a cult, but has a terrible understanding of what cults are and how they work (as a side note, I have seen people say that the job Jack gets is inside Project Victory, which tells me some people have a hard time understanding how MLMs work). More often than not, cults are fascist-y, and I don't mean this in ideological terms, because fascism is fundamentally action and not ideology. A fascist movement is first a charismatic leader and a goal, and then an ideology is formed to theoretically support the former. Which usually means that most charismatic leaders of cults are not believers in the cause; the cult is an excuse to gain money, power over others, and/or satisfy the leader's appetites (that's why sexual abuse is so so common in cults). Cults prey on people that are isolated, emotionally starved, and idealistic, people that want to bring change or do good and are willingly to put a lot of volunteer work on it. The cult establishes heavier mechanisms of isolation, control, group aesthetics and a them-vs-us mentality that hinders questioning and raises a barrier for leaving to disillusioned members (public perception of people in cults as bad people that deserve bad things and no help does also greatly contribute to that goal). The big villain of DWD is not realistic that way, but if he were, the movie would have been radically better. Show that the man is in it for the money and the power trip and the sex, and that he is extremely cunning and charismatic and that's how he can get away with it. Have the heroine be able to look through his facade. Built in a redemption arc for Jake, if you want, based on the realization that he's being used. Or not, if you don't want to. You can have a failed attempt at making a resistance (resistances don't work in cults because the structure itself is designed to prevent them from succeeding). Show the difficulties the heroine faces in leaving the cult. Attempt to showcase what kind of people and why would fall for a cult like this one.
Man is an evil evildoer because he's evil and the men that follow him are evil because they are evil and bad can be satisfying if all you want is dehumanize and make a fantasy of dismissing the threat your ideological enemies pose, but it's bad storytelling, and a fundamentally lazy and unthinking storytelling.
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zillennial97 · 3 years
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Enemies to Lovers | Larry Fanfic Recs
Walk That Mile by purpledaisy | 149k | Explicit
Harry stares at him, the line of his jaw standing out scarily. “I wanted to get the most out of this trip so I planned it carefully.” His voice is low and steady and somehow that’s worse than when he was yelling. “So far, you’ve put your sticky fingers on everything I’ve tried to do.”
“Sticky fingers?” Louis repeats, offended. “Are you saying it’s my fault you got stung by a bee? Had you been alone you would have gotten halfway to the Dotty Diner and ran the car off the road because of an allergic reaction, so don’t go blaming me.”
“Polk-A-Dot Drive In,” Harry spits before getting out of the car. He slams the door shut with a deafening reverb and Louis rolls his eyes.- A Route 66 AU where falling in love was never part of the plan.
Unbelievers by isthatyoularry | 136k | Explicit
It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan.
Or: The one where Louis and Harry definitely aren’t friends, and football is everything.
we're not friends, we could be anything by nooelgallagher, yoursongonmyheart | 115k | Explicit
Louis narrows his eyes at Harry. “What that supposed to be a fucking joke?”
Harry narrows his eyes right back. “It was a good joke.”
Louis rolls his eyes. “Jokes require laughter, Curls.” Louis glances down at Harry’s thighs again, Christ. “Your pants must be so tight they’re restricting airflow to your brain.”
Harry wipes a bead of sweat off his forehead. “Pretty sure yoga is supposed to increase airflow, blood flow, and all that,” he responds dryly, finally jumpstarting himself and walking away from Louis towards his own bedroom.
Louis can’t help but stare at his broad back, still sheen with drying sweat, and his perky bum in the tight yoga pants.
Louis swallows. Christ.
...Or, the one where Harry and Louis are unlikely uni flatmates who definitely don't like each other and definitely won't fall in love (even if Liam and Niall think otherwise).
Our Lives, Non-Fiction by indiaalphawhiskey | 113k | Explicit
Heralded as the next Neil Gaiman, Louis Tomlinson does not appreciate being told that his very serious novel is in dire need of a PR boost. Even worse, that it comes in the form of a joint book tour with the UK’s #1 online romance-writing sensation Marcel Styles. Already turbulent at best, their partnership takes a drastic turn when, overly stressed about his looming deadline, Marcel accidentally blurts out a secret: though he’s famed for his scorching hot literary love scenes, he is, actually, a virgin.
Convinced that the only way to rid himself of writer’s block is to gain some experience, Marcel asks Louis, author-to-author, to sleep with him – for Science. And of course Louis agrees because, well, what on Earth could possibly go wrong?
Or, a lesson in romance that proves that sometimes the best love stories aren’t always by the book.
Soft Hands, Fast Feet, Can't Lose by dolce_piccante | 112k | Mature
American Uni AU. Harry Styles is a frat boy football star from the wealthy Styles Family athletic dynasty. A celebrity among football fans, he knows how to play, he knows how to party, and he knows how to fuck (all of which is well known among his legion of admirers).
Louis Tomlinson is a student and an athlete, but his similarities to Harry end there. Intelligent, focused, independent, and completely uninterested in Harry’s charms, Louis is an anomaly in a world ruled by football.
A bet about the pair, who might be more similar than they originally thought, brings them together. Shakespeare, ballet, Disney, football, library chats, running, accidental spooning, Daredevil and Domino’s Pizza all blend into one big friendship Frappucino, but who will win in the end?
Dance to the Distortion by Lis (domesticharry) | 96k | Explicit
Louis accidentally breaks Harry's camera lens and in order to get it fixed, they decide to participate in a romantic couples study. The only issue is that they are not actually couple. Well that and the fact they cannot stand each other.
You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) by lucythegoosey | 95k | Explicit
Harry was in the biggest boy band in the world. He was also one half of the best (or worst, depends on who you ask) kept secret relationship in the music industry.
Now, almost five years on, after One Direction has broken up, and Harry and Louis' relationship has as well, a video threatens to put everything at risk.
One determined Irishman, a massive publicity stunt and two begrudging exes are all it takes to bring One Direction back to life and maybe, just maybe, Harry and Louis' mangled love life too.
Or: Harry and Louis are forced to fake-date after an old video from when they were dating emerges.
The Sidelines by RedRidingStiles | 47k | Explicit
"Alright, I know you guys are the best of friends but I'd like you to do this for the rest of the team,” Cowell says, making the rest of the team snicker. "So I want both of you to compliment each other." "I hate your trainers. I mean that in the nicest way possible. They're very...yellow," Louis says, arms crossed as he offers a fake close-lipped grin. "It's really nice of you to blow anyone you find slightly attractive," Harry replies, a sickening sweet smile on his lips. "Thank you, children, let me remind you this is a college hockey team. Try again," Coach says, completely unamused.
Or Harry and Louis play hockey for Penn state and can't stand one another, since they can't keep their hatred off the ice their coach and team do what they can to keep their hard earned spot in the playoffs and their two star players from killing each other
Wonderwall by AFangirlFantasy | 43k | General Audiences
Taking the sheet cluttered with times available for the next few weeks, Louis notices a pattern in the list. The name of the person Perrie had just mentioned: Harry Styles. It’s written at least seven times, and three of which are during timeframes Louis wants.
“Who the fuck is Harry Styles?”
“You’re about to find out,” she answers, pointing over Louis’ shoulder.
Or a Love/Hate College AU where Louis Tomlinson is the lead singer of The Rogue - the most popular band on campus - and Harry Styles is the talented Freshman unknowingly challenging all that.
All the Right Moves by cherrystreet | 32k | Explicit
This is the third game in a row that Harry has been distracted by the noisy boy in the stands, five rows back.
There’s really no reason that he should feel compelled to stare into the audience as frequently as he is, but he can’t help it. This boy is a nuisance. And he’s loud. Even from basketball court with nine other players running by him, shoes squeaking on the shiny hardwood floor, and thousands of cheering college students, Harry can hear this boy nearly shrieking, his laugh more like a cackle than anything.
It’s seriously obnoxious.
Nicotine by KrisStylinson | 32k | Explicit
"We're two different types of people, Liam. He likes sex and drugs, I like theater and tea. Trust me, we'd never date." Except they would, they do, and neither of them plans on letting go anytime soon.
"Just because you can get me hard doesn't mean I like you," Louis whispered. The fact was, he didn't like Harry right now, not at all. Not even a bit.
"Yeah, yeah," Harry murmured, his breath fanning over Louis' cock as he spoke. "You done telling me how much you hate me so I can suck you off?"
Like Candy In My Veins by littlelouishiccups | 31k | Explicit
“Um…” Harry said slowly after a moment. “Okay. That’s… this is… Let me get this straight.” He lifted up a hand and swallowed. “You told your family that you have a boyfriend… and my name was the first one you thought of?” “Harry Potter was on TV, alright? It wasn’t that much of a stretch.” Louis pinched the bridge of his nose. He couldn’t believe he was explaining himself to Harry fucking Styles. He couldn’t believe he was stooping this low. “Forget it. I’m sorry I even thought about bringing you into this.”
Harry snorted. “What? Did you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?”
(Basically the A/B/O, enemies to lovers, fake relationship, Christmas AU that nobody asked for.)
We're Like Bumper Cars by sincehewaseighteen | 31k | Explicit
“I have won, I won the final cross country. I win, Harry--”
“Whoever gets to fucking nationals wins it, pretty boy,” Harry teases. “You haven’t won. Interhouse is nothing compared to nationals, or interstate. You haven’t even won interschool. You can dream all you fucking want that you’ve won.”
Louis becomes so ignorant he decides to no longer eye the boy taunting him. “Trophies prove it all, Styles.”
“Where’s your trophy for biggest asshole?”
“Where’s yours for winning cross country?”
Harry growls before hooking his fingers in Louis’ belt loops and bringing them together for a flat kiss.
Or the AU where Louis and Harry are rivals of the century and Cross Country competitors before things get complicated and they play pretend.
After Hours by Velvetoscar for shipsdrifting | 26k | Not Rated
Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson are the bane of each other's existences. Unfortunately, they're already in love--even if they aren't completely aware of this minor detail.
[A "You've Got Mail" AU]
When It's Late At Night by Rearviewdreamer | 25k | Mature
Louis has zero interest in an ex-boybander turned solo artist when his appearance on the show gets announced, but that's exactly who he gets stuck with when Harry Styles shows up at the Late Late show to promote the release of his debut album. For an entire fucking week.
Or
The Late Late prompt that we all need to get through this excruciatingly hard time.
Love Me Please by angelichl | 23k | Explicit
Louis hates Harry, which is fine because he would really rather prefer to avoid him at all costs.
The only problem?
They're soulmates.
runnin' like you did by orphan_account | 20k | Explicit
“Should we tell him?”
When Lauren is met with everyone either nodding their heads or shrugging, she takes a deep breath. “I mean, I think it’s pretty obvious by now.” She stalls, sounding ominous and Louis doesn’t like it one bit.
“What is obvious by now?” Louis asks. He’s starting getting anxious. “I swear to God, spit it out. Stop being so damn cryptic.”
“I—We think it’s pretty obvious that you’re in love with Harry,” she states simply and shrugs as if she isn’t telling him he’s in love with the second—Nick being the first—most annoying person on the planet.
or, a college au where Louis knows how to hold a grudge and is definitely not in love with Harry Styles
Three French Hems by 100percentsassy, gloria_andrews | 20k | Mature
In which Louis is a designer at Burberry and Harry spends December wearing Lanvin… and Lanvin… and Lanvin.
once bitten and twice shy by pinkcords | 19k | Mature
This time as his stomach rolls, there’s no doubt about it. He’s going to vomit. And if he does, it’ll be on Louis’ shoes, a nice little parting gift to go with the embarrassment he’s caused the both of them. “I’m gonna throw up,” he says just as Louis turns to look at him, blue eyes swimming with shock and confusion, and asks, “Is that true?”
Or, in a rush of bravery only senior year can bring, Harry confesses his feelings in a letter to his neighbor and best friend, Louis, only for the entire school to hear it and laugh him out of their small town in Wisconsin. Ten years later, Harry's a successful lawyer at Columbia Records, coming home for Christmas for the first time since he departed for college. He plans to work his way through the trip, eat his mom's cooking, and avoid everyone from his past for as long as possible. The only problem is best laid plans hardly ever go as intended.
That's How I Know by allwaswell16 | 19k | Explicit
Louis Tomlinson has just landed his dream job, coaching soccer at Augustus University. When he moves into a new house near campus, he meets his very fit new neighbor, English professor Harry Styles. Although their first meeting leads to an instant mutual dislike, the more Harry gets to know Louis, the more he likes what he sees.
Or the one where Harry’s African grey parrot spills his dirty secrets to his very hot neighbor.
Get Off of My Cloud by Marora_Daris | 9k | Explicit
Harry is the most annoying neighbour that sexually frustrated Louis could have. Niall decides it's a good idea to handcuff them together.
Featuring guinea pigs, animal print leggings and inappropriate boners.
Erase My History, (Expo)se Me by BayouSexual, pacificrimjob for Edandcurly | 6k | Teen And Up Audiences
“My hair does not smell like strawberries.”
Louis blinks up at Mr. Styles. “I never said your hair smells like strawberries. How would I even know that?” Harry’s hair does smell like strawberries, Harry himself smells like strawberries, everyone who’s been within three feet of him knows this. ~~~~~~~~ Or the one where Harry and Louis both teacher history, their students think they should date, and one pink dry-erase marker is trying to ruin their lives (with a little help of course).
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twohearts-hs · 4 years
Text
‘Two Can Play That Game’ - Harry Styles Imagine
Words: 5.8k
Pairing: Gang Leader!Reader x Gang Member!Harry
Warnings: Swearing, death, smut
Summary: She rules a deadly gang, he has a price on his head. He works for the enemy, she is the enemy. What happens when Harry begins working for Y/N when really he is working with her rival.
|| Masterlist in bio }}
-
He caught her eyes the moment he entered the room. The way he presented himself, dark suit and little curls. She was in awe. His eyes held a mystery to them as she made contact with his. There was something about him that she was intoxicated with, possibly his heavy cologne, the lust in his eyes or the muscles that were hidden under his shirt. She was infatuated with him at that very moment. 
The mysterious man shook hands with her father. A smirk plaster on his face as he nodded towards the stranger. Y/N watched, standing next to him; she knew the mob was a messy job and she hates that she was brought up in it. Yet, here she was about to take the reign from her father.
“Mr Styles, this is my daughter Y/N, she just took over, so please get comfortable,” the older man told me, “Mr Styles will be our new right-handed man since you know what happened, darling,” he winked at her. She smiled but felt the deep shiver in her body from what happened to the last man.
Her father walked away, heading to his office as she stood in the living room with this new stranger.
“Call me Harry,” he said, taking the whiskey cup he was offered and sitting on the couch. She smiled.
“Call me Y/n then,” she replied, cocking a brow as one of the server handed her a glass of Merlot. “My father told me that you use to work with the FBI,” she began making conversation.
“Yes, I did. I didn’t enjoy following the rules, working for the government to look into people like us. I like the freedom than the constant breathing down my neck. With a job like this, I can do what I please,” he said, moving his hand from his side to sliding it on top of the couch. Y/N stayed still, keeping her movements clean and proper. 
“Fair enough,” she mumbled.
“Why is a lady taking over London’s most dangerous mob?” he asked.
“Why isn’t a lady taking over London’s most dangerous mob. Maybe unlike you, I have been raised in this world. I have seen people dying since I was born, saw blood from the moment I was conceived and I know pain before it was shown to me. I am lady, I am wealthy, yet most importantly, I am deadly. So please, Mr Styles do not offend me or else you won’t be calling your mother on Mother’s Day to apologise how anti-feminist you are,” she told him, looking him up and down as she got up from the white leather couch.
“Y/N,” Harry began, placing the glass down on the golden side table in the lavish, French traditional home to follow the beauty he now calls his boss. “I am sorry, I have been in this business for a while, therefore I was simply shocked, darling,” he said, grabbing into her arm to turn her around. 
Eyes meeting eyes as they locked. Of course, there was some sexual tension but both were too stubborn to recognise it.
“Don’t touch me,” she said sternly, raising her eyebrows to the curly-haired man.
“My apologies, madame,” he said. She was different, standing there with curled hair and a white dress; so odd for the mob. In his eyes, she was innocent, young and dumb...like Bambi. 
Y/N watched the man across from her, she pressed the glass to her plump glossed lips as she looked at the exotic creature. He was different, seen the dark world, mysterious, full of lust and just plain intoxicating.
“How much has my father told you about my mob?” she asked, keeping the distance between them.
Harry, standing in the black Gucci suit, rings at home on his fingers and whiskey glass in hand began walking up to her. “Not much. I am just here to protect you,” he began, her feeling his breath from the closeness, “protect the mob, sell drugs,” his breath moved to over her ear. His lips were so close, and a shiver went through her body. “Kill some people on the way,” he backed up, a smirk on his lips, as he filled his glass.
“I am your boss,” she placed the glass down and grabbed the whiskey that was his. She walked away as he stared at her ass, and she sat on the leather couch. “You do what I say and you don’t question it,” she began as he leaned against the bar in front of her. “There’s a second mob on the other end of London, we don’t talk to them. We aren’t at peace but we aren’t at war, so don’t fuck up,” she states, raising her eyebrows at Harry.
“Got it,” he nodded towards Y/N. 
“No, I am not done, Styles,” she stated, “No funny business with anyone on the team, that makes things extremely awkward for you. Nobody is allowed to talk to me unless I direct them to. You are to give me messages, no one else. If I want something, you get me something. If I ask you to do something, you better fucking do it,” she says. “Finally, mi casa es su casa, Harry, make yourself at home.”
Then she just walked out.
-
She was a stunner. He knew it and she knew it. The way she acts, she knows affects every person in the room either gender. Y/N was sex on wheels. Harry had a job to do and he was bloody good at his job. He had never let feelings get in the way before, therefore this would be easy. 
“Y/N, the Fester’s are here,” Harry said, entering her office. It has been a few weeks since their initial meeting. He went to Spain for a few days, she went to New York, therefore it has been a while since they saw each other.
“Thank you, Harry,” her hair was pulled up into a messy ponytail as she walked out with a feminine suit on.
“What’s the deal with the Fester’s?” he asked, as they walked down the hall to the dining room.
“Christian!” she smiles, walking in to see a tall, broad, blonde man. The two of them hugged one another and placed kisses on each other’s cheeks. Harry watched with a frown on his face. 
“Harry, this is Christian. He is my arms man, my assassin,” she said with no hint of remorse in her voice. “Christian, this is Harry, my second man.”
Harry nodded towards the blonde with multiple tattoos, yet he ignored him the whole time. The two were friends, he noticed. Yet, he hated the way the Italian touched Y/N like that, the gentle touches on her arm or the chuckle that escaped from her lip from a stupid joke he made. Harry just watched from the corner.
“I have someone you need to deal with,” she began, “remember Luke? Luke Harrison?” “Didn’t you fuck him?” he asked. Y/N rolled her eyes.
“He is a Harrison, I had to get information from someone and touching him made it happen. Anyway, he placed his nose somewhere he shouldn’t and I need him gone.”
“He is a Harrison, Y/N, you are gonna start a war,” Christian said.
“Kill him. He found out the route of my sales to America. I need him dead and once doing so, thirty million will show up in your bank account.”
Then she walked out. 
“Harrisons?” Harry said catching up to her.
“The Southside mob, Harry. Keep up, you should know this stuff,” she said, walking towards the black car outside. 
Y/N got into the black Range Rover, closing the door as Harry spoke, “Where are you going?”
“To deal with some business. We have a snitch, Harry, and I, of course, have to clean up after those idiots like their mother. I’ll see you when I get back.”
-
Harry rode up to the mansion he was very familiar with after all these years working with the Harrison’s. His motorcycle stopped in front of the golden doors to the London bound home. He knew he shouldn’t do this to her, but it was his job. He worked with the Harrisons, and he has for a while.
His ringed hand pushed open the big wooden door to the grand foyer, dark, dirty, mysterious, unlike her. Two sides - so different - he learnt. Y/N was an angel, or so he thought; dressed in white, a charming smile, bright home, yet Caleb Harrison was the opposite.
“Harry!” a booming voice came from the stairwell and a broad, muscular man emerged...Caleb.
Caleb Harrison was a twenty-eight-year-old mobster, his job was the oldest out of the town. His family has been doing this since time and law existed. Everyone had a hidden truth, both Y/N and Caleb do, Harry knew. He knew that once upon a time they lived in peace until Y/N did something, that thing Harry has yet to figure out due to the harsh whispers of even mentioning the beauty’s name.
“How is she?” he smirked, patting Harry on the back. Harry managed to get a smile out as he was handed a glass of whiskey. “My finest, aged twenty years, I only bring it out for celebration so tell me something good.”
“She,” he tried to say, “She is going to kill one of yours,” he managed to say. It was hard, he has never had this issue. He brought down multiple mobs before, whether female or male-led, but she, she was something in her eyes.
“Of course she is. The Devil always likes throwing a fit,” Caleb said, pushing back his dark hair. The Devil that name echoed in his brain, he never heard people call her that before.
“The Devil?”
“Born and raised by Hell itself,” he said, taking a sip from the glass, “Don’t be fooled by her looks, she always gets what she wants. That is why I put you on this case, you are just like her. Harry, you always get what you want. Yes, Y/n is a looker, her personality is out of the world and damn, that body will keep you moaning for ages, but she’ll ruin you in a snap of her manicured fingers,” Caleb said, moaning with the mention of her name.
“You love her,” Harry spat out, Caleb’s eyes widened.
“I did, but who doesn’t? I just need her brought down. Who is she going to kill?” he asked, sitting down at his desk. Harry leaned against the wall, looking out to the distance, red velvet couches, black wallpaper and a musty smell lingered. Her home was gorgeous, traditional, clean and French with a rose smell lingering. He preferred her home to his.
“Luke,” he muttered. Caleb let out an echoing laugh.
“Let her kill him. He is a drug addict, hasn’t done any good for me.”
“She screwed him,” Caleb shook his head and let a nasty smile grow.
“I thought you were smarter than this, Styles. That woman screws anything that walks as long as it benefits her.”
Harry let out a puff of air, “She is paying this man thirty million because she was believed he found out about her trade routes in America.”
He didn’t like Caleb, the self-righteous, narcissistic, self provoking asshole, but he made a contract all those years ago when he made a bad move with the government and he still has to pay it off. 
“I know about those trade routes because she told me five years ago as we fucked. She isn’t as smart as you think. Sometimes dancing with the devil gets you something, try it sometime, Harry,” he winked, getting up from the leather chair and patting him on the shoulder on the way out. “If you want to fuck her, go ahead. Just don’t tell her your dirty secrets. She’s fun though, enjoy it while it lasts. I’ll see you next week,” he said, walking out of the room.
Harry let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he moved out of the dark and gloomy room to his bike. He didn’t like the way men talked about her, like an object, a feared and loved object. Something to pass around. The blood in his veins began to boil as he thought about the words of Caleb over and over in his head. Anger had to come out. Therefore he left with a hole in Caleb’s gross black wallpaper.
-
“They call you The Devil,” Harry said, walking into the greenhouse, seeing her in her robe and hair down. It was nine in the morning on a Sunday. Sunday was her day to do nothing. \ He leaned against the doorway in the famous black suit she began to love as she smirked to her book. Her sunglasses perched on her nose, designer, expensive, is what screamed from just looking at her.
“So I heard,” she replied, charming being spat at you the moment she opened her glossed lips. “It is a Sunday, Harry,” she muttered, turning the page.
He walked up to her, hands in his pockets as he sat next to her. “I know.”
“Sundays are my day off. Not your day off, how come you aren’t in the meetings I assigned you?” she placed the book down on her lap.
“I cancelled them, moved them to tomorrow,” he calmly said looking out the open window. “Beautiful view, by the way, look at that pond,” he winked.
“You did what?” she raised her eyebrow.
“I thought you and I should get to know one another, so I booked this day off to play with one another,” he smiled, nodding his head to her.
A chuckle left her lips, a chuckle like honey due to him initiating that chuckle. “To play?”
“To play. I thought we could go into town, get some coffee, go for a walk, shop maybe, whatever you like to do on your days off with your friends.”
“I don’t have friends,” he rolled his eyes.
“Of course you do, what am I to you?”
“Fine. Give me half an hour to get ready,” she said, placing the book on the side table and walking out of the greenhouse.
-
Harry knew she was hard to get to. The girl never opened up, she was witted, stubborn, charismatic and she tended to always be ten steps ahead. And he hates to admit it, but he was falling for her. 
The two of them were walking down the streets of London, ending up in the shopping area then sitting in a café looking over the busy streets they call home. She was beginning to loosen up, her ‘leader of a mob’ vibe was slowly beginning to fade as chuckles were exchanged over a cup of coffee.
They sat together, on a booth looking onwards to the street. She was so close, touching thighs then hips and now he threw his arm on the back of the sit. 
“I heard a little rumour,” he said, looking at her as she pursed her lips and locked eyes with him.
“Did you now, what is that rumour?” she raised her eyebrows and letting a smile come to her face. 
“What’s the history between you and Caleb?” he asked, no more flirting, just straight forward. Her eyes instantly stopped looking at his as she placed the mug down.
“Who told you about that?”
“Y/N…” he tried.
“I loved him until he came and almost killed me. He wanted my empire. That’s it,” she told him, refusing to look at him again.
“Y/N, I am sorry,” he began, “you truly don’t deserve that—”
“Kiss me,” she interrupted him, looking at those emerald eyes and just whispering the words that both of them wanted to hear.
“What?”
“You heard me, Styles, kiss me,” she states again. He keeps his eyes widened, not knowing how to respond to her. She leaned in closer, “and here I thought you weren’t a pussy. So kiss me,” she mumbled into his ear, trailing her breath across his jaw to his lips.
Their eyes locked as a smirk appeared on his face. “You are a tease, my darling,” he states. He moved his hand to her hip, cupping it and pulling her closer and ramming their lips together and letting them lose control.
Her hand went to his jaw, cupping it as his fingers began brushing against her exposed thigh. Seconds later, heavy breaths filled the room as they pulled away. A laugh interrupted the silence as she let out a chuckle. He began laughing too as she placed her head on his shoulder. 
“Why are we laughing?” he asked as she still silently chuckled for a second.
“I don’t know. I kissed you,” she says.
“And that’s funny?” he asked amused.
“No, I just never let my emotions run wild, but you change me for the better, Harry.”
“Well, I am glad I do,” he said with a beaming smile, “now let’s head back.”
-
“Mr Y/L/N,” Harry said walking into Y/N’s house as she saw the man in a suit and tie watching him. The older man smirked, a chuckle erupting as he welcomes Harry in. The Italian man sat down on the white couch he knows so well as he tsks his teeth trying to find the words.
“My daughter, you would say she runs the mob well, eh?” he begins, getting up and pouring himself a scotch at the bar. He walked back, handing one to Harry as Harry took a deep breath.
“She is amazing, sir,” Harry said, nodding towards him, appreciating the beverage. 
“It is hard, watching her run it when I am back running the other half in Italy. She does it so well, just like her mother. She is beautiful, intelligent, stubborn and a bit of a bitch, my daughter, wouldn’t you say?” he asked.
Harry bit his lip, “I can only say good things about her.”
“She likes you, Harry,” he states, turning his head to him, “I have never seen her so fond of a man before. She isn’t even that fond of me. The only man she had remote interest was Caleb and I am ready to punch that bastard’s brains out,” he told him. Lorenzo patted Harry’s shoulder, looking into the Brit’s eyes, “You like her back. You’re a good guy, Harry, I would love to see you take over the business, but if you break my little girl...there will be some consequences--”
“Father,” Y/N walked in, seeing her father and Harry together. Lorenzo got up, placing his cup down and kissed his daughter on the cheek. 
“Just talking to Harry, my dear,” she smiled, watching him exit her home.
“You don’t like him,” Harry said walking up to the girl and placing his hands on her hips.
“Who doesn’t? He practically stole me from my mother, and then placed me in this business,” she said, placing a kiss to his cheek. She began walking away, but Harry grabbed her hand spinning her around.
“We fucked last night,” Harry said, with a stern face. Y/N raised her eyebrows. He grabbed her by her waist and pulled her in, “I don’t fuck around, Y/N.”
“Aww, I’m honoured,” she winked, bopping his nose.
“I am being serious, what are we?” he asked her, glaring her down.
“You are my partner?” she innocently said, giving a wink and a smirk.
“Partner in crime, bed or in life?” he asked, she laughed getting out of his grip and skipping down the hallway.
“All three, now help me with this idiot in the basement.”
-
Y/N wandered into her bedroom, wrapping the white silk robe closer to her body as she placed the glass of red wine on her bedside table. It was time to relax and rewind, it hasn’t been a pleasant day in her eyes. She looked at herself in the mirror and a little smile came to her face as she brushed her fingers across her shoulder. He left marks on her and for some odd reason, she loves it.
“What are you doing?” Harry walked up to her, wrapping his arms around her waist and whispering in her ear. Her fingers held onto his hands as she melted into his touch. A little smile came to her features as he whispered in her ear sweet nothings.
‘I’m admiring the marks you made,” she said as he began kissing her neck, turning her rapidly and placing his lips back on her plump ones. Their lips worked as one, as they fumbled towards her bed. 
Harry rid his t-shirt as she dropped her robe, leaving him in just his jeans. His hands gripped her waist as he littered kissing on her face. Harry kept pushing her closer to the bed as her little hands compared to his underdid his belt, pushing his jeans and underwear done as she fell on the bed. Giggles erupted the silent room as she kissed his shoulder.
“Are you ok?” he asked, rubbing his hardened cock as she mumbled a yes into his neck. He smiled, pulling back, straddling her as she smiled. He didn’t know what it was but every time they met eyes, he fell more in like with her, possibly close to love. Her hands ran over his shoulder, tracing the tattoos lining his toned body. He pushed forward, kissing her again as she wrapped her body around his. Y/N’s hands gripped his butt as they made out, sexual tension increasing by every second. Their hunger for each other was too much now and Y/N pulled away, grabbing a condom from her bedside table and taking a sip of her red wine as she crashed her lips back on his, more than just needy for him.
Harry took the condom from her as he opened it and rolled it on his cock. She looked into his eyes as he looked up.
“Ready?” she mumbled, he nodded as he grabbed her hip, pushing her down on the bed as her legs opened. He lined himself up with her entrance as he slowly slid in. A slight moan came from her as he pushed himself in. Y/N grabbed him by his face and placed a hungry kiss against them as she slid her hands down his hips to his butt, grabbing it as he began to move to a steady movement.
Moans and groans escaped their lips as they fucked in her bedroom. The sound of slapping of skin and light little huffs, as well as pleasure sounds, were now heard in the once quiet room as they fucked the shit out of one another.
Y/N’s hands moved from his butt to his hips, grabbing them as she pulled away from their quick kisses to one another. She mustered the strength as she pushed him over, swinging her legs over his thighs, riding him and wrapping her arms around his neck.
“You are so cheeky,” he muttered, pushing her sweaty locks of hair as he smiled to her, trying to not let too much noise escape from his lips as she rocked her hips against his swollen and hard cock. 
Y/N smirked, kissing his cheek as she whispered in his ear, “I am only cheeky for you, mister,” he moaned at her words as she moved her hips faster. She pulled his hair, letting his head push back as she captured his lips once again.
“Grab my hips,” she muttered as his ringed hands gripped her hips, pushing her harder on his cock as they fucked. Both bodies covered in sweat as they moaned each other’s name.
“I’m going to cum soon,” she muttered in his ear as he nodded.
“Me too, cum with me,” he whispered back as he pushed her body back on the bed and towered over her.
Harry’s ringed hand grabbed her thigh, wrapping it around her butt as he fucked her harder. Y/N couldn’t take it anymore, so close to her finishing that she just let sounds out. He was truly amazing at pleasuring her and she thanked him.
They finished together, heavy breaths exchanged as he rolled off of her, snuggling himself against her body. 
“I know we have known each other for only a few months, Harry, but I think I am falling for you,” she said, playing with his hair as he placed his head against her breasts and wrapping his arms around her.
“I think I am falling for you too.”
-
“Why the grin, Styles?” Caleb asked, walking out from the corner to him. Harry stayed quiet.
“I can’t work for you anymore,” he stated, placing the phone given to him down on the desk.
“You have a debt to pay, Harry,” Caleb said, clicking his tongue as he pulled his suit jacket back, showing a gun.
“I have been working my debt for a while. I think I’ve cleared it,” he pushed back.
“You’re fucking her, aren’t you?” Caleb responded, rolling his eyes, “Here I was thinking that you’re the smart one here, Styles. You are fucking The Devil.”
“It doesn’t matter what I am doing, all I know is that you’re the bad guy here, Caleb. I am done,” he responded, turning away.
“I take it back. You aren’t just fucking her, you are in love with her. Stupid Harry Styles, he’s gonna get his heartbroken by that slut,” Caleb responded. Harry instantly turned around, walking quite fast to Caleb, raising a fist.
“Don’t talk about her like that,” he said glaring down the man.
Caleb snickered, rolling his eyes and shaking his head, “You’re in love with her. I sent you on this mission six months ago and you’re like a lovesick puppy. It’s funny in all honesty,” he pursed his lips, Harry lowered his hand.
“I want out of this, Caleb. I may be in love with her, but I paid back my debt and if you refuse to let me go, I’ll tell her about our history--”
“So she can fix up your mess? You humour me, Styles,” Caleb said, “You’re not off the hook. Here’s your next mission.”
-
Harry sat on the couch at her house, as she walked around the room talking about her day and grabbing herself some snacks and a glass of wine for the movie they are about to watch. He loved seeing her like this, in her natural state as she expressed her feelings, her words and what was in her head. Y/N wasn’t calm, collected, stern or cold when she was with him anymore. She was soft and every second, she was falling for him and him for her.
“You’re not listening to me, H,” she said, sitting next to him as he wrapped his arm around her.
“Of course I am, love,” he told her kissing her temple.
“I am meeting Caleb tomorrow,” she said, kissing his lips, and looking up to him.
His eyes widened, “Why?”
“Because, my dear, I have a plan,” she said, poking his nose and winking.
“Now, why are you being so quiet?” she asked, kneeling in front of him and cupping his cheeks. He smiled gently at her, looking away as he tried to form the words on his tongue.
“I lied to you,” he said, she stopped rubbing his cheek as he pulled away and ruffled his hair. “I lied to you, Y/N.”
“Lied to me about what Harry?” she responded to his frazzled voice. Harry still couldn’t look her in the eye as he tried to form the words he desperately wanted to say. “Harry, baby, I love you, remember? Nothing is going to change that,” she said, “I’m getting worried,” she grabbed his cheeks and pulled him to her. “Look at me, tell me,” she pleaded.
“I lied. I had a price on my head and Caleb helped me to pay it off as long as I worked for him. I, Y/N, I was a spy. I was hired to tell everything about you--”
She pulled away instantly, “And did you tell him, Harry?” he nodded.
“Not everything, just in the beginning. The moment I got feelings for you, I stopped. Please, love, forgive me. Let’s move past--” “Stop,” she said, pulling away from his embrace as she walked out of the living room. “You broke my trust, Harry. I fucking trusted you, I fucking trusted you. I fucking love you and this happens. Get out!” she said, looking at him with such anger that he didn’t recognise her orbs anymore.
“Please,” he pleaded, walking towards her to try again to grab her hand.
“No. I love you so much--”
“Then forgive me. I have been feeding you information for months.”
“Why haven’t you told me sooner?” she asked, rubbing her temples. 
“Because I was afraid of this, darling,” he said, taking a piece of her hair and twirling it.
“Just get out. I’ll call you when I am ready to see you again, Styles,” she told him, walking past him, bumping shoulders as she left. Then she was gone.
-
She sat, biting her nails as she looked around the darkroom. Y/N recognised her bodyguard by the door as she waited for the man she loathed so much. The man that was truly a snake in disguise and an artist of vileness. A man who crushed her heart and spread rumours around that she’ll open her legs up for anyone and they call her the Devil. They call her The Devil when really it was him who was the devil.
She was supposed to meet Caleb a few weeks ago, but she refused to go when she was in that emotional state. Its been three weeks since she saw Harry and it was the hardest three weeks of her life. The beauty felt lifeless, lost and sad without him and she just wanted him back. Yet, she couldn’t, she had a business to run and she had a plan.
“Why’d you cancel?” The Devil walked in, she rolled her eyes, looking at the bloodstain on his cheek.
“You have a little something,” she said, rubbing her cheek.
“It’s for you to lick off later, you love it when I get all down and dirty,” he winked to her and she just gagged in the inside.
“Oh, you wish. I am here on business, let’s talk.” Just then, her Harry walked in. Suit on and hair fixed perfectly as she watched him sit next to Caleb. He was hurt, she recognised. She could see it in his eyes.
“My associate and I have come with a proposition, we’ve seen how you run your empire and we’re impressed. But there is room for approvement and we’d like to offer our services,” Caleb said, lighting a cigarette and placing it to his lips.
“Hi, Harry,” she said, raising her eyebrows. “We all love a traitor,” Y/N said, standing up and walking across the room, brushing the chairs with her fingers types as she pulled a chair out and sat on it. She leaned forward, forehead almost touching with Harry’s, yet pulling back.
“So, you think you’re so superior. With your little suit and tie and the Rover on the driveway. You really thought you could just take my empire, like that,” she said, snapping her fingers. Y/N placed her palms on the table, “You’re wrong and here I thought you’re so smart, Caleb. Don’t make a deal with the Devil, is what they say, huh? How come you wanna mess with that shit?” she smirked to him, glaring the man down.
“Do we have a deal?” he asked, voice stern. Y/N turned her back on him, placing her hands on the hip.
Three men were stood behind Harry and Caleb; three bodyguards. Y/N turned around, whipping the gun from her holster as she took three easily shots to the men. “No, we don’t,” she mumbled, blowing the smoke from her gun. “Didn’t your mother taught you to play nice? If you play dirty, two can play that game.” Harry stood up, fixing his suit jacket as he walked towards Y/N.
“You nasty piece of shit. You bitch,” Caleb said, pulling his gun out and pointing it to her. Harry pulled his and pointed it to Caleb.
“You may have street smarts, but at least I know what the fuck I am doing,” she told him, “Shoot me, my gang won’t go to you. Shoot Harry, that won’t change anything except make me really sad. We don’t want me sad, last night, I killed your brother. So, make a smart choice here Caleb. If you don’t kill me, we could forever be in this fight where everyone knows you love me. You won’t kill me. Kill Harry, I’ll kill you. Make your decision,” she said, no hesitation in her voice.
“You were also smart,” he told her.
“I know,” she told him, as he lowered his gun.
“You two will make beautiful babies,” he said again, looking at the floor as he tried to buy time.
“I know that too. I wish I could send you an invite to the wedding or the baby shower. I have an old friend who wants you, Caleb and not in a good way. He’s standing outside. What is going to happen, is Harry’s gonna open the door and you’re going to not resist. He’ll take you away and we’ll never have to see each other again. Harry and I can move on, and you will be dead. There are some people who actually know how to make a deal with the devil, sugar, you just aren’t one of them.”
-
Y/N walked out of the bathroom, silk robe wrapped around her as she made her way to bed. Harry sat, with a book in his hand. Its been six months since Caleb was taken to Japan where he made a bad deal with a gang leader there. They have been happy since. 
“You’re so badass and beautiful,” he cheekily said, as she climbed in bed and met him with a kiss. She giggled in between the kisses as his hands drifted to her butt. “Here, I thought you hated me in the beginning,” he said, kissing her cheek as she pulled away.
“What?! No! I never hated you when we first met,” she said, cupping his cheeks as she straddled him with her knees in the queen size bed.
“You so hated me,” he told her, smirking and dragging out the “oh” sound. 
“No!” 
“Yes, no kiss me you little bugger,” and she gladly did.
“I really love you,” she mumbled, against his lips. He hummed in agreement.
“If you really love me, bug,” he kissed her again, “then marry me.”
-
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onlychild-syndrome · 3 years
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I really wanted to show the name but, I decided to be the bigger person.
#1
Attention whore really? Y'all, whenever you think you are the dumbest person in the world remember that some people think that harry styles is an attention whore.
#2
Miss. Ma'am there are at least 5 million teenage girls who simp for lhh (my sis included). Whose opinion should i trust? I'm a lesbian but i hv eyes!
I get it, its your taste but you have no right to insult someone. There is a simple principle Don't like? Don't comment! Especially commenting on appearances is body shaming. This answer came under why do you hate Harry Styles and hating someone because of their appearance is not appealing to you is just not right!
#3
Ok, I'm assuming you mean his speed of talking? Because nothin else sticks out... excuse me mister I talk pretty damn slow in real life and people are like do you have problems speaking English? And I'm like shut the fuck up that's just how I talk! So same applies for him!
#4
Umm, I don't even know what u mean in this one.. he is confident but not like "Hey, look at me! I'm the reason y'all are alive" "I'm the big deal, hunny" "Hey, I sing the bestestest in the world"! He is one of the most modest celebrities I have ever EVER seen.
#5
Umm, wut? In the universe where Harry Styles doesn't hv talent I don't exist. He is extremely talented and lmao this is your opinion ig so I'm not gonna opinion shame or whatever. Also One Direction means seeking the same direction AKA going the same route.
#6
I'm not even gonna comment on this one. One suggestion though go see a few of his interviews and decide for yourself if he has the potential of being a rapist serial-killer. Remember there is a wrong answer. (Hint - He cant hurt a fly)
#7
Lmao you are opinion shaming us which is why I wanted to reply to this. I don't have a Quora account so, Tumblr is the next big thing.
|
Also at the end of the day you do you and I'll do me! I can't go inside someone's brain and reprogram them. You are most likely someone who has heard one song of Harry Styles/One direction which was not to your taste and decided that you were gonna be "quirky" and "different" and hate them.
Well bro, I'm not gonna opinion shame you but some of these points (Eg - #2, #7 etc) are just not civil. Also don't put questions like this up (Reason - They are controversial and cause fights). I'm not trying cause an argument here but honestly I was pissed after this "related answer" came up at something else I was reading about. This post is just a heat of the moment thing.
TPWK (I tried to be kind about this post)
Have a beautiful day xx
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supergenial · 4 years
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Cindered Shadows was pretty decent
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I recently finished the Cindered Shadows DLC and decided to once again write about my impressions, don't worry though, this one isn't as long as the previous ones. Spoilers: I think this is as good as fire emblem is gonna get for a while.
1) No Agarthans, thank GOD
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A story as old as fire emblem: There's an interesting human villain with down to earth motivations or obsessions, but in the large scale of the story they're overshadowed by a supernatural being who wants to destroy the world for no reason other than "they're just evil". This is Edelgard and the Agarthans, Arvis and Manfroy/Loptous, Rudolph and Duma, Ashnard and Ashera, Walhart and Grima... you get it. This shit sucks to put it bluntly. Having these stereotypically evil bad guys who are clearly evil is one of the main things that brings down the plot of any fire emblem game. I'm of the belief that they should kick out these supernatural villains and just leave us against the human villains, the one's with actual ideals and beliefs other than "hurr durr, destroy the world".
And then there’s our villain for this DLC. Now yes, it feels like they recycled a certain professor from the Harry Potter series, but I like that he is "The" bad guy for the DLC, he's not being controlled by anyone. He's obsessed with Byleth's mom and in-game this makes a lot of sense. If Byleth, who is incapable of communication, can drive people crazy for them just by existing then just imagine a Byleth who can actually talk. Her "waifu" charms must be off the charts, so I can't blame this guy for being obsessed. More importantly he's not being controlled by the Agarthans, he's not being played by anyone. He's a man who's lived a righteous life, he took care of a lot of people who all love him but ultimately decided to use them for his own gain and his own obsessions. As far as FE villains go... He's good, honestly, great job Intelligent Systems, I expected a lot less.
2) Reduced avatar wanking
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Shots fucking fired
Sure, Byleth's mom is a main focus of the plot, and Byleth is the one who sets the plot in motion, but rarely does it feel like the game is going "gee Player, you're so great, you're our god, we all love you and want to marry you". Byleth still plays a large role sure (unfortunately) but it still feels like this is the story of Yuri and his gang with Byleth being their strategist which is, idk, way better than the idea behind the main game? The one where Byleth turns into a literal god, gets every achievement of the army attributed to them only, has every other conversation remind us how glorious Byleth is, etc.
In fact the dlc goes as far as having Hapi constantly belittle Byleth and even make fun of their communication skills by calling him Chatterbox (good job to the localizers, she doesn’t say this in the japanese audio). Get that teacher’s ass girl, destroy them. (Obviously I would hate this behavior if it was directed to someone else, but in this case I'm willing to make a concession).
3) Yuri's backstory
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Ashe: I admire and love this man who is my only parental figure but Rhea said he's kind of bad so I killed him Yuri: Church ordered me to kill a bunch of thieves and delinquents and I refused
You have no idea who much I love the fact that Yuri is someone who protested his orders and got kicked out of the church for refusing to kill civillians. This instantly sends him very high in my rankings. Playing through the first half of the game all I wanted was to stop and say "No, Lady Rhea, fuck you. I don't think it's very cash money for the most powerful military force in the continent to eradicate a lightly armed militia of farmers (with popular support in their locality!)" this is what true imperialism is all about! But there is sadly no option for that.
Just by telling us that Yuri is someone who was punished for saying "No, these orders are inhumane, I refuse to carry them out" that is enough for me, the game is saying "yes, we know, have your compensation price". In the end Yuri is extremely loyal to Rhea which is unfortunate but hey, at least they lampshaded one of the most glaring issues I have with the main game, so that's at least something.
4) "You've obtained all information. Proceed with the story, NOW"
Rather than wasting time forever thinking up which activity I should carry out, abyss is simply a place where you talk to the abyssal denizens to get some plot information or speculation, and boom, you're done. No running around forever, no quests, no doors that take ages to load. You can perfectly skip the abyss parts and at most you'll miss out on Edelgard's conversation with Dimiri (which is fucking hilarious) and a few rusted weapons that can be forged but that's it. Upon talking to every resident of the abyss the game will actually say you’ve acquired all information and will prompt you to go into combat rather than assume you want to dilly dally for a while.
I actually rather like this and would not be opposed to it being the philosophy behind future in-between segments between chapters. I can understand IntSys wanting to load in a ton of features like a sauna and fishing to rack up excitement for the game, I know I was excited for fishing, but when these activities have rewards tied to them, replaying becomes kind of a chore, "aw geez, I have to fish 69 fish to reach professor rank A+ AGAIN" (I actually had to when trying to get the piss screen from clearing maddening). Getting only some conversations and a bit of context for the story, that's... pretty good honestly, I liked this better than the monastery and better than My Castle. Throw in some skits with multiple characters at once and I’m gold
(seriously how come there’s no scenes with the three of the bros, Dimitri, Sylvain and Felix all hanging out together, the fact that a third character never shows up in support conversations is fucking bad)
5) Sometimes less is more
I've extensively complained about three houses already but bear with me. Yet another thing that infuriates me about the game is the extensive amount of work it required. I truly do think that if they had released only the blue lions route and left everything else in the plot as mysterious and unexplained loose ends left entirely up to speculation, that'd be a great game on it's own. Instead I have to see all the hard work that went into making the other routes only so that, in the end, they just had me going "well it was ok I guess". Every scene in the game requires work, many hours of coding, writing, voice acting, sound editing, making sure the models don't look too messed up, bug testing, etc. The amount of work that went into three houses was brutal regardless of what you think of the final product, yet a lot of people didn't even bother playing through all of that. So yes, I honestly wanted less, give me a more concise game rather than spreading too wide and ending up thin.
Cindered Shadows on the other hand is concise to a fault to make up for that. The story is pretty straightforward and leaves no loose ends to itself, there's no anime cutscenes, no supports (within abyss, you can support them all in the main game). There's even that very awkward sacrifice scene where some characters are having their life and blood drained from them yet the visual representation we see is just them standing around like normal, with Yuri even doing that hand pose he does all the time instead of squirming in pain or something. It's very awkward looking, objectively not good, but it gets the point across and doesn't make me go "wow you put in all this effort for nothing" because the whole thing is also fairly short (5 to 10 hours in hard mode).
I know, it sounds like I'm shitting on the dlc, but the point is I'd much rather get something short that leaves me satisfied than something like the main game that makes me go "this could've been so hecking gooood if they changed X" for the rest of my life.
6) The gameplay
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Chapter 4 is my favorite mission in the whole game
They made Hard Mode good. I previously said maddening was the one difficulty where this game made sense, but this one achieves perfection with just hard mode. This is because the team actually knows what you have. In the main game there's all sorts of variables to account for due to the large amount of player expression that is possible, you can reclass anyone into anything and throughout many lucky or unlucky level ups, maps can be entirely different based on that rng and choices. Here though, your characters already have solid bases starting at lvl 20, and you can't reclass too much so the devs know exactly what you're working with and can plan accordingly. Beating the maps feels incredibly satisfying not just because the objectives have more variety now, but also because you feel like you found the right way to use the tools you were given. This is why the first few chapters of any fire emblem game often feel so good, because the devs know exactly what you have.
Not that I think player expression is bad! It's very satisfying to warp skip chapters and to use broken units like battalion vantage+wrath Dimitri as these things make you feel like you've truly subjugated the game, but it takes some time for those things to really take off. There's a time to reap and a time to sow, and the sowing time can get pretty dull sometimes but that's what makes the payoff feel worth it. Still, for a short experience like cindered shadows is, this style just fits perfectly, plus chapter 4 has quickly become one of my favorite chapters in the whole game, along with chapter 6.
7) In The End
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Idk folks, I just like it. If you just want more adventures with the three lords, this is it.
If you’re looking for any excuses to avoid this I'd say the better ones are: maps are reused from the main game (they work much better here though), it's 10 hours at most so it's price-to-cash ratio isn't very good with the expansion pass being $30, and also the Abysskeeper feels a bit TOO winkwink nudgenudge to me, especially since Gatekeeper was popular enough to make it into Super Smash Brothers. Like yeah bro, we get it, we all love Gatekeeper, you didn't have to do this.
I also like that they finally gave Dimitri a semi-problematic quote where he says he kinda likes the idea of poor people living underground out of sight, I think it’s a very rich-white-boy flaw to have and not entirely awful given his life experience up to that point. And yes I do think he has no flaws and is entirely unproblematic in the main game, “feral” as he may look it doesn’t seem like he goes around killing civilians or doing anything other than busting up imperial troops which is kind of justified since they started the invasion, on top that he’s the strongest unit in the game and the most chill and honest ruler once he calms down, so little dent in his record that’s irrelevant in the large picture is indeed welcome.
Overall though, after being so massively disappointed by the Fates DLC, so much I didn't even bother with the ones for Echoes, I certainly like what I'm seeing here and that's a good sign, bravo Intsys.
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zhantesblog · 3 years
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3)Research and analysis into brand structure (making a brand)
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A brands is more than just a logo; Although it might help with the brands identity you have to take into account other factors such as the vision and purpose, the customer-who is the target demographic?, price- how much are these products being sold for?, products- what is being sold?, place- where are these products being sold (online or in store), promotion-How are these products being promoted? and the packaging.
Vision and Purpose
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The vision and purpose is at the heart of every successful brand. It provides businesses with guiding principles and values for the development and delivery of their brand and its outcomes.  A vision and purpose can range from serious to life-changing or just a bit of fun. It helps us to create a deeper meaning into the context of a brand.  In order for a brand to be successful, the vision and purpose must be authentic and the brand must live up to its values from the way it treats its staff to the products it sells and the way it speaks to their customers.
”… the most important brands in the world make you feel something. They do that because they have something they want to change. And as customers, we want to be part of that change...
Yes, we admire the product they make. But the thing we love most about them is the change they are making”  
David Hieatt 
SELFRIDGES Vision and Purpose:
“Our vision is to be the destination for the most extraordinary customer experience, and our people are central to achieving this. Team members across our business maintain our vision through the values we live day-to-day and the unique Selfridges spirit we bring to every project.”
Sourced from: https://careershub.selfridges.com/members/modules/job/detail.php?record=153
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Image taken and found: https://envirotecmagazine.com/2020/08/17/selfridges-unveils-ambitious-initiative-incorporating-new-retail-models-and-an-attempt-to-shift-shopping-mindsets/
Selfridges is a shop run on imagination: a place where the world’s most covetable brands combine with the most extraordinary spectacles, events and ideas for an experience like no other. Selfridges began when Harry Gordon Selfridge moved from London from Chicago in 1906 with his heart set on opening his dream store. Selfridge had a revolutionary understanding of publicity and the theatre of retail and with this knowledge, Selfridges Oxford Street opened its doors to the public for the first time in 1909 and has two more stores located in Manchester and Birmingham. In 2016 Selfridges was the first ever store to be awarded the title of ‘World’s Best Sustainability Campaign by a Department Store’ in line with its focus on buying better and inspiring change and on three unprecedented consecutive  occasions in 2010, 2012 and 2014 also won the coveted ‘Best Department Store in the World’ award, underlining its place at the forefront of retail.
“Here at Selfridges we have 5 values which are the core of everything we do. They are the way we do things, they are actions not words, our moral code and guide how we behave. They are what holds us together and gives us authenticity and integrity.”
WE OWN CUSTOMER EXPERIENCE
WE TAKE RESPONSIBILITY AND DELIVER
WE SHARE OUR KNOWLEDGE
WE LEAD AND INSPIRE
WE SHOW RESPECT
Sourced from: https://careershub.selfridges.com/members/modules/job/detail.php?record=153
To secure the vision and purpose of any brand you must take these questions into consideration:
Is it a good idea?
Is it a new idea? 
Is it scalable? 
Will people want it? 
What change will it bring about?
Does it matter to you?
Does it matter to your customer?
How do you know?
Is it good for the planet? 
Is it good for the human? 
What is your niche? 
Is it a common problem? 
Does this problem need solving?
Do you love it?
Brand Identity
A brand identity is what makes your brand recognisable to your customer and how you want your brand to be perceived.
Brand Identity is created by bringing together:
Brand name.
Logo.
Slogan or taglines.
Tone of voice.
Colour palette.
Typography & graphic styles.
Visual identity.
These form a ‘toolkit’ or guideline which is to be applied across your entire brand.
LEVI’S brand identity:
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Images sourced from: https://www.behance.net/gallery/40403081/Levis-Brand-Identity
Levi’s has a clear and distinctive logo that is pushed across throughout all of their branding and promotional front. It’s made very clear to their audience that they are an all American brand. The colour red is consistent and used throughout behind a brown background and two horses on their tags to create that rustic western look and feel.        
Customer
A successful brand puts the customer at the heart of everything they do. You can’t know your customer by relying on Google searches or reports. The only way to really get to know your customer is through reaching out to them and getting to know who they are.  In order to create lasting brand loyalty you must understand the past, current and future needs of our customer – where are they now and where will they be in 5, 10, 15 years. 
To begin you can consider creating a customer profile through the use of in depth questions such as:
Where do they shop and what do they buy? 
What do they do for a living?
What kind of income do they have?
What does their family life look like?
Where do they live?
How do they socialise?
What kind of holidays do they go on?
What car do they drive?
What media do they consume?
Why are they your customers?
What can you do for them?
Identifying your competitors is a great way to help gain more insight into who your customer is. Identifying your competitors means that you are able to identify what your customer expects in a product and what your customer will expect to pay for the products. If there is a brand that traditionally serves your current market but are now not doing well, this could be an opportunity for you to see the flaws that these brands are making and use this to do things differently and adapt how you interact with your customers and If there are already similar offerings on the market doing well, this demonstrates that a market exists for your products.
In our research it would be useful to conduct a survey of people from our chosen target demographic, to help gain a better understanding of our customer which will be useful in shaping both our brand and the type of products we want to sell.
GLOSSIER Customer:
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Image sourced from: https://transparencydigital.ca/owning-customer-relationships-glossier-case-study/
“If we can engage customers further up the [sales] funnel and earlier in product development and brand strategy, we will be in a position to create what people actually want,”  
Glossier’s president and CFO, Henry Davis
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Image found and taken from: https://mireillebobbert.medium.com/aarrr-startup-metrics-applied-to-glossier-a-story-about-the-user-journey-of-a-lifetime-2f287d0c3d93
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Image taken and found from: https://www.slideshare.net/ChrisOrcutt1/glossier-customer-needs-and-persona
Customer engagement- 
Glossier’s SVP of marketing, Ali Weis has developed Glossier’s marketing team and strategy with one goal in mind: to truly understand and serve their customers. Weis has said, “We were able to test, learn and scale our structure and processes with the customer as our ‘true north’.” Weiss focuses more on customer engagement than traditional bottom-line results. This means that Glossier didn’t go down the traditional route of spending huge amounts on advertising or offering discounts and special promotions. Glossier’s cult-like following is a result of customers feeling like the company was created just for them and, in a way, by them. Because of this, their customers are made to feel like they are co-creators of the brand .Beyond the standard product development and performance measurement teams, Glossier in addition to this have what they call a Customer Experience Team- which embodies the heart and soul of the company. They are the eyes and ears of the brand, constantly collecting feedback from their community of customers and assuming responsibility for creating the best experience possible with the brand. Glossier has made it a top priority to make sure the customer’s voice is always heard and have built a structure that keeps the customer front and centre through the process.
I believe that this is a good approach in helping to build customer morale and engaging closely with your target audience. It makes them feel included and as if the products are made with them in mind- it becomes more personal. I believe that when creating our own brand, me and my group should look further into this and try to use this approach to make our customers feel more connected to our products and to create a better engagement rate with them.
Price 
The method of how you plan to trade your product will also impact your pricing significantly:
Wholesale: You produce a product and sell it to another retailer.
Wholesaler: You buy a product produced by somebody else and sell it.
Direct to customer: You produce a product and sell it directly to your customer without the middle man
A few of the factors affecting price include but not limited to are:
Economic factors & physical limitations.
Value perception.
Price psychology.
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Although you might start as Direct to Customer, your margin should also take into account the potentially to wholesaling your products. Not taking this into consideration could end up with you losing money if you decide to work with a retailer in the future. You tend to make less in your margin by wholesaling, however, having your product in well respected retailers can be a great marketing strategy. Not only could it introduce your product to potential new customers, it will also add value to your product/s. You can look at is as it as a stamp of approval. Large and global retailers have also invested heavily into their online stores and distribution meaning your product will be able to reach new international markets.
Here are some economic factors to consider: 
Retail model. 
Marketing you are selling to.
Cost to develop product. 
Cost to produce product. 
Material costs. 
Packaging costs. 
Taxes / VAT. Exchange rates.  
Shipping costs. 
Marketing costs.  
Store overheads. 
Staffing costs.
Perceived value
Brands tends to adjust pricing which reflects their customers perception of a products value.
Things that can add perceived value to your product include :
Packaging Social media campaign 
Catwalk/fashion show 
Ethical/moral interests of the brand eg. Sustainability  
Materials used 
Ecommerce experience
Instore experience
Press coverage 
Brand heritage 
Celebrity endorsement 
Availability 
Pricing Psychology
Brands use strategies to influence customers to spend money. Through a variety of psychological pricing strategies, stores are specifically designed to encourage you to spend more than you intend using this tactic can help drive sales. These techniques are not limited to retail stores but are also very effective when applied to other industries as well.
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Psychological pricing involves setting prices lower than a whole number. The idea behind psychological pricing is that customers will read the slightly lowered price and treat it lower than the price actually is. An example of psychological pricing is an item that is priced £2.99 but conveyed by the consumer as £2 instead £3, treating the £2.99 as a much lower price than paying £3.00. This is called charm pricing.
 Psychological pricing techniques come in many forms. Four examples of psychological pricing strategies include: 
Artificial Time Constraints
Limited time sales where everything is half price or a quarter of the price for a set amount of time- we can see these tactics in action on sites like boohoo and pretty little thing. This is known as artificial time constraints. Stores place these restrictions on their sales because they act as a catalyst for consumers to spend. If your customers believe that the sales are only temporary, they’re more likely to make their purchases today, rather than next week. This creates a sense of urgency and makes the customer feel as if they have to buy something in fear of missing out on these deals.
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Charm Pricing
Charm pricing is the official name for all the prices ending in 9’s (£1.99) Studies done by researchers at MIT and the University of Chicago have shown that prices ending in ‘9′ creates an increase in customer demand for products.
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Image sourced: https://www.nayax.com/psychological-price/
This phenomena is driven by the fact that we read from left to right, so when you encounter a new price at £1.99, you’ll see the ‘1′ first and perceive the price to be closer to £1.00 than it is to £2.00. In essence, ending your price in a 9 convinces customers that you’re offering a great deal even when in actuality there's not much difference. 
Charm pricing can also have the opposite effect with more higher end products. While prices ending in ‘9′ connote a “value price”, prices ending in ‘0′ suggest a “prestigious price.” So, if you’re selling more valuable items such as a diamond ring it would be wise to end the price in a ‘0′ to give your customers the impression that they’re paying for something that is expensive and worthwhile.
Innumeracy
According to a study done by researches at the University of Minnesota, most people would prefer to spend money on items labeled as ‘ Buy one get one free’ as opposed to ‘50% off two items’ even though the two options are identical (buying two items at 50% off is the same as paying full price for one and getting the second free).
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Image sourced: https://www.natalieoshea.co.uk/buy-one-get-one-free/
This phenomenon is known as innumeracy, where consumers are unable to recognise or understand fundamental math principles that they apply to everyday life. 
Price Appearance
The design of your prices have a tremendous impact on how your customers perceive the value of your products. Many Restaurants for example will most likely be in a much smaller font and won't have the added zeroes at the end of the prices. They’ll be presented as ‘19′ instead of ‘£19.00′.
The reason for this is because longer prices appear to be more expensive for consumers than shortened prices, even if they represent the same number. This is due to the fact that subconsciously, the longer prices take more time to read. This effect is compounded by the use of a ‘£’ sign for prices. Not only does it make the price longer, but it also firmly relates the number to consumers’ wallets, which increases the idea of being more expensive.
Product
It is essential to select the right products for your customer.
When deciding on the type of products you want to sell you must consider:
If your product is timely and relevant?
If your product is responding to a need or a desire?
Why would a customer want to buy this product? Is it desirable?
Always refer back to your customer and your vision and purpose.
There are two routes for sourcing a product:
Product development: This is where you design & manufacture your own product.
Product buying: This is where you buy and sell products that have already been developed by a brand. 
The two most common product types are seasonal and continuity.
Seasonal: Product developed to be sold for a short period of time. 
Continuity: Also known as carry over, this product is sold all year round.
Place
 It is important to consider:
Where you want your brand to be seen.
Where your products will be sold.
What your store (physical or digital) will look and feel like.
How your products will be displayed?
What experience do you want your customers to have?
Every business must consider where they want their customers to interact with their brand. In todays retail environment this does not necessarily mean a physical place. Due to the current pandemic it would be a good idea to consider focusing on selling products mostly online. Although a web store can be much cheaper than a physical shop, you have to be aware that all elements of your online presence should be cohesive and communicate your vision and purpose clearly.
There are still a lot of costs associated with having an effective web store though. You have to make sure that your website is not only visually engaging but that it is updated regularly and that there is enough information about all of your products to assist the customer when purchasing their product.
Due to companies like ASOS and Amazon offering same day or next day delivery for free, expectations of online shopping are increasing and many small brands cannot compete with this.
You also have to take into account how your customers are going to find out about your website and even physical shops will always have a certain amount of foot fall so it is important to consider how you promote your place.
“Generation Z enjoy visiting malls, seeing people, socialising and being with their friends”
Robert Conrad, professor, LIM College
It is important not to assume that all Gen Z customers will only want to shop online as 67% still prefer to shop in stores. However, the way they shop is different from previous generations. Gen Z value technology, and want to push old boundaries.
The current pandemic has shifted many businesses focus when considering Place as global lockdowns are enforced. However, this doesn’t mean that an online shop is enough to keep customers engaged.
Due to the loneliness and digital burnout that consumers are currently facing due to the pandemic, businesses should consider how they can create a “third space” for consumers to foster an idea of community.The pandemic drove a shift from traditional high street shopping to a focus on supporting their local communities and independent businesses.
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Image sourced: https://bcuadvantage.co.uk/grow/ways-to-support-local-business-this-christmas/
Promotion
How are you going to stand out?
While online tools like Instagram, Shopify and Depop have made it easier to start an online business, attracting attention from potential consumers to your products has proven difficult. Acquiring customers in this environment requires a level of creativity and ingenuity as social media is flooded with so many brands both old and new competing with each other for noticeability.
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In order to successfully promote your brand you should have a detailed plan in place which covers all areas in:
PR:
Press Release.
Target publications.
Collaborators.
Influencers.
Events:
Customer events.
Industry events.
Marketing:
Advertising including photoshoots.
Media partners.
Digital marketing:
Website.
Editorial content.
Social Media.
Agree a hashtag.
Multi-media content.
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Images sourced from: https://sendpulse.com/support/glossary/cross-promotion
Brands that have common interests and audiences that aren't competing with each other can cooperate for mutual benefit- this is referred to as cross promotion. This is a great way to promote products as it allows pre existing customers from one brand to be introduced to yours. According to Partnerize’s research, 54% of companies mentioned that partnerships drive more than 20% of total company revenue.
Cross-promotion is a convenient and profitable way to promote products. Because it is quick and effective, cross-promotion became especially popular during the financial crisis. If a partnership is built right, it can help double your audience. Companies exchange knowledge and ideas, give advice, and mention each other in articles on their websites, social media pages, and in emails, all while developing their promotional programs.
The main benefits of cross-promotion include:
An influx of new leads
Increased brand awareness
Increased sales
Audience growth
Lower advertising costs
Improved reputation
Packaging
Product packaging is an important customer touchpoint. Packaging can highlight and determine the value perception of your products to the consumer. Cheap packaging=Cheap product. Packaging can also form a significant element of your cost price which will also affect your retail price.
Environmental factors play a huge role when deciding on how you will package your products. What is the packaging made out of? is it sustainable? Is it cost effective? These are some of the things you have to take into consideration when thinking about how you're going to package your products.Looking at where and who is manufacturing your products can also have a significant impact and is also important to research and look into.
The type of product and method of sales (online or in store) will drive and determine your packaging needs.
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Image sourced from: uk.Mimmosa.com
Brands use packaging families to ensure a consistent look and feel across their products. The colour used throughout your packaging is an important tool in growing brand recognition. 
Luxury brands invest heavily in packaging as part of the sales ritual.
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123designsrq · 5 years
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HERE COME AUTONOMOUS SELF DRIVING BUSES
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It’s natural the world’s first fully autonomous self-driving bus would emerge from Finland. Finland, surprisingly, is frequently regarded as the ‘Silicon Country’ that gave the planet Nokia and virtually set the blueprint for mobile communications. Nokia began in Finland, as well as for over two grand decades before Apple launched the iPhone, Nokia was the conventional to conquer. Actually, there is a high likelihood that the first phone would be a Nokia (I understand mine was). Publish-2010 when Nokia saw a slowdown, and was acquired and dissolved by Microsoft, these engineers and designers moved onto bigger and things. The dissolution of Nokia saw an upswing of the likes of Rovio (Angry Wild birds), SuperCell (Clash of Clans), as well as Sensible 4, the organization that designed the program behind Gacha, the world’s first self-driving bus which was created to operate under any climate conditions. THE COLLABORATION Gacha was produced together with MUJI, which provided the look language for that bus. Courtesy a partnership facilitated by Helsinki Business Hub (which promotes collaboration between worldwide agencies and Finnish talent) MUJI, headed by Naoto Fukasawa, made contact with with Sensible 4, the brains behind the self-driving software. Since as soon as the 90s, Sensible 4 has worked on self-driving tech. Actually, they can tested a functioning self-driving Jeep in 1993, however the computers within it were just too large, there wasn't any spot for humans to sit down! The collaboration came into being as Sensible 4 started plotting methods to make trains and buses more autonomous and frictionless. The concept for any 10-person bus that may navigate any place in any weather was created and MUJI immediately leaped aboard to assist bring the vision to existence! The Look of the Autonomous Bus The name Gacha develops from a Japanese toy figurine frequently present in shops and malls across Japan. These Gachas could be in the massive toy-dispensing gumball machine and when you place the cash in and pressed a control button, the toy will come tumbling out, encased within an almost spherical container. This container, which housed an individual toy within it, grew to become MUJI’s inspiration for that Gacha, and also the name stuck around too. The Gacha’s dual-colored design is inspired through the toy container’s two-piece construction too. It provides a soft, filleted design that immediately seems friendly and welcoming, unlike the rigid style of autonomous buses, or even the aerodynamic style of trains. The soft form helps break barriers by not developing a strictly defined wall or perhaps a ceiling. The curved, almost womb-like form immediately enables so that it is regarded as friendly around the outdoors along with the inside… an element that’s essential, states Naoto Fukasawa, thinking about how daunting the possibilities of a self-driving vehicle might be. How big the automobile is ideal too, allowing 10 individuals to be sitting down as well as an additional 4 more and more people to face inside. The seating design is favorable to friendly conversation. Unlike most buses which have seats facing one way or individually designed seats arranged linearly, the Gacha includes a running bench from left to right. It requires inspiration in the seating of saunas, a Finnish heritage and tradition, encouraging individuals to sit in groups. Its dimensions are crucial too, based on Sensible 4’s Chief executive officer Harri Santamala. The Gacha’s small size (along with its top speed of 40mph) is ideal for small shuttle activities. Public transit is protected due to its speed, and assuming interest in the Gacha increases, municipalities can easily deploy more vehicles on the highway, instead of making bigger vehicles which are more accommodating. Lastly, the Gacha’s design is bilaterally symmetrical like a stroke of complete genius. Having a design that does not possess a back or front, Naoto states the Gacha can certainly operate in left-hands and right-hands driving countries. The headlamps and taillamps are built-into a running Brought strip round the waist from the vehicle, and a straightforward switch inside the software makes it possible for the headlamps and taillamps to change direction, allowing public transit to operate easily on any side from the road without requiring costly hardware/build changes. The entire lack of a motorists cockpit or controls means the insides are totally bilaterally symmetrical too, in the benches lower towards the in-bus displays. We've Got The Autonomous Technology Sensible 4 has worked on autonomous driving tech for virtually 3 decades. Using the Gacha, the organization finally sees self-driving vehicles really making their method to roads around them. How's Gacha not the same as other self-driving vehicles all over the world? It’s the very first self-driving vehicle made to operate in practically any the weather. Finland, apart from fostering a remarkably gifted tech community (not only is it among the 3 countries on the planet to curently have legislation in position for self-driving automobiles) offers the right testing ground for self-driving cars, given its weather diversity. Far from the sunny plains of Bay Area, Finland turns out to be an entire obstacle course for that Gacha. It sees snow, rain, sun, hail, fog, and also the roads are frequently difficult to travel through, simply because they might be snowed in, frozen and icy, or simply plain uneven in suburban areas. Sensible 4 has labored lengthy and difficult to build up an automobile that may not just sense roads and obstacles, but perform its tasks in inclement weather. The Gacha, outfitted with a multitude of sensors, cameras, and mapping systems, can traverse dense fog, heavy snow, as well as torrential rain having to break a sweat. It may travel through roads utilizing an on board GPS navigation along with a map, sense traffic and signs/signals to visit in compliance using the law, stopping at red lights, zebra crossings, or perhaps when there’s a hurdle in the path. Within the snow, the Gacha knows wherever speed breakers are, using a mix of radar, lidar, and sonar, and it is intelligent AI may even pre-plan alternate routes if roads are closed, unsafe, or perhaps crowded. Phone way Gacha captures and procedures its surroundings The Gacha, ultimately, is built to be considered a autonomous passenger bus. Consider an Uber Pool in excess of 4 people. It may operate inside the city in addition to suburbs, obtaining individuals who summon it and preparing its routes based when needed, using Sensible 4’s advanced algorithms. Instead of getting a set route just like a public autonomous bus, the Gacha could make diversions to get individuals who will need to go to particular destinations, with its 100km range and 6-hour battery existence, can complete multiple runs before retiring to some nearby charging station for any quick recharge. The Exam for the Autonomous Bus RIDE Public transit was unveiled around the eighth of March towards the public of Helsinki, having a flag removed from the deputy mayor from the city. It'd snowed yesterday, and for that reason, the roads were slushy and slippery, and that i remember everybody complaining about how exactly miserable the elements was, as the Gacha team had just the opposite reaction! These were more than pleased to show the self-driving autonomous bus in undesirable weather and driving conditions. Unveiled at Helsinki’s recently built central library, the Oodi, the Gacha is made they are driving inside a cordoned off position for the general public, such as the press. Walking in to the Gacha, I instantly appreciated registering two reactions. My thoughts understood just what a problem it was, to become sitting in the vehicle which was operating by itself, with simply no instructions or controls from the present human… but simultaneously, it felt as an incredibly familiar experience. The thing is, we’re accustomed to something quite similar having a subway or perhaps a train. You do not always begin to see the driver from the teach you sit in. You simply go into the compartment and stand there aimlessly understanding that the automobile will complete its journey along with you within it, as well as your only job is to buy off at the stop. That’s exactly what the Gacha felt like too, and it is an amazing win for that industry since it immediately helps remove any fear the general public might have with self-driving cars. Practically how big a sizable cable vehicle, the Gacha moved around by itself when i, plus a number of journalists, sitting inside, attempting to register just what a problem it was. There is immediately a feeling of belief within the autonomous bus, and that i doubt a vehicle might have the very same feeling because individuals are utilized to driving their very own cars, however with a bus, you’re usually always a passenger. The Gacha understood wherever to prevent, when you should as well as for how lengthy to spread out its sliding doorways, so when to embark. It completed a circular journey around a clear plot outdoors the Oodi library, and plotted the very same path without worrying about lanes, lines, or perhaps a roadway. It stopped whenever a pedestrian became of compare into it, and started immediately when the coast was obvious. The Brought strip round the Gacha did a outstanding job of letting people know precisely if this would stop, if this was awaiting boarding, so when it would depart. In each and every which way, the Gacha did just what it guaranteed to complete, using the intuition of the human driver, knowing exactly when and where to proceed. The Autonomous Long Run The Gacha might be able to receive from point One place to another by itself, however it still provides extensive obstacles to mix. To begin with, Sensible 4 is delivering public transit (its only prototype as of this moment) towards the northern laplands of Finland to function under snowy conditions. They will gather all of the necessary data to help make the Gacha are more effective with lesser friction, regardless of weather. In addition, there's a significant conversation around the existence of self-driving automobiles according to the risks of we've got the technology. The immediate fear is losing jobs, however in any evolving society, old jobs die to provide birth to brand new ones. The deputy mayor of Helsinki believes the Gacha can create new jobs by using it. The 2nd most significant fear may be the protocol within an undesirable situation as an accident or perhaps a calamity. As the Gacha is heavily enhanced and speed-restricted to avoid moving accidents, still it remains determined exactly what the autonomous bus is going to do in case of one. Unlike humans who may flee a scene, the Gacha must be a lot more accountable and responsible, whilst being responsible for anyone there. Because of the Gacha’s 2021 debut date, we might finally obtain a clearer picture from the safety protocols of self-driving vehicles. As the Gacha continues its year-lengthy test run within the town of Espoo, Sensible 4 is given the job of locating a hardware/manufacturing partner for that vehicle. Using the technology and design in position, the organization wishes to have governments of metropolitan areas and municipalities invite it to explore the general public transit system. The Gacha also provides extensive possibilities outdoors trains and autonomous buses. Having the ability to act as a logistics vehicle, or perhaps moving retail store just like a grocery, or possibly a MUJI shop (!) on wheels, the Gacha can don many hats, serving not only local governments and municipalities, but corporations. Ultimately, the truth that the Gacha is able to travel with any type of weather with no need of a person, really enables the automobile to seamlessly integrate into a number of countries, cultures, societies, campuses, as well as companies. Made to just be an automobile which will reliably receive from point A to suggest B with no glitch, problem, or fuss, the Gacha includes a universal outlook and appeal that appears lightyears in front of it is time! Read the full article
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inverted-sheep · 5 years
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The New York subway is great. It runs 24 hours a day, seven days a week and there are stations everywhere. And it’s cheap – only $2.75 for a ride that could take you from one end of Manhattan to the far reaches of Queens or Brooklyn. There are no zones to worry about, it’s a one-size fits all system.
So using the subway to get around New York should be dead easy right? And it is. Sort of. So long as you take account of its quirks and allow yourself a bit of time to get your head round it without beating yourself up when you find yourself in completely the wrong part of Manhattan.
The C train. Always check you’re on the right train and heading in the right direction.
To help you get started (and be slightly less confused than I was) there are 9 things you need to know before using the New York subway.
The subway map resembles a Jackson Pollock painting
The London Underground is the oldest metro system in the world. It makes sense then that London was the first place to figure out a new and improved way of presenting its metro map. Over the years as more tube lines had been added to the original Metropolitan line, the map of the underground had become a tangled mess. In 1931 Harry Beck, an engineer and draughtsman with London Underground, had had enough of trying to follow squiggles and spent his spare time coming up with a new way of helping people plan their routes. He realised that as you were travelling underground most of the time and just going from station to station, you didn’t really need to know the route the train took. He came up with the schematic map we know today. It’s more of a diagram than a map and has clear straight lines linking the stations which are pretty much evenly spaced apart. This map was such a success other cities around the world quickly followed suit.
Apart from New York.
The New York metro map is still in the original squiggle style. Lines swirl around all over the place making it confusing to any first-timer who’s used to metro maps in, well, just about anywhere else really.
And if this wasn’t enough, there is a city street map underlying the subway map. It’s all very heavy on the eye. The type on printed versions of the map is also so tiny I could have done with a magnifying glass. I ended up taking photos on my phone of a large map I found on a platform and just zooming in on it when I needed to.
Many stations share the same name
There’s a reason why the subway map has a city map underneath it and that’s because many stations share the same name. So you have to look at the city map to check which 23rd street station it is you want and then check to make sure you’re on the right line. Get the wrong one and you’ll exit on completely the wrong side of Manhattan.
Look across the middle of Manhattan Island (above the red circle). There are three 14th Street stations, four 34th Street Stations and five 23rd Street stations!
Confused by what I mean by this? Well let’s imagine London for a moment. In New York the stations are named for the streets on which they are found. In London they have names. For example, Piccadilly has three stations along its length, but not one of them is called ‘Piccadilly’. At one end is ‘Piccadilly Circus’ and at the other end is ‘Hyde Park Corner’. In the middle sits ‘Green Park’. Now imagine that all three of these stations were just called ‘Piccadilly’. If you got out at Piccadilly Circus when you actually wanted to be at Hyde Park Corner you’d have a bit of a trek. Well this is what can actually happen in New York unless you really understand which station it is you want and ensure you are on the right line.
Many lines share the same colour
Well that’s not so difficult is it? Just make sure you’re on the right line? Actually it’s not that simple. The lines are coloured, but it’s not a case of each line being assigned a unique colour. The brown line, for example, could be the J or the Z line; the green line could be the 4, 5 or 6 lines and the orange line is the B, D, F and M lines.
The stations aren’t always clearly named
Some stations have rather fetching mosaics with the names of the station written on them.
Once you’re on what you hope is the right train you just need to get off at the right station. Looking out of the window as the train pulls into a station won’t always help you as some stations are really badly signed and you won’t see a name at all from your train window.
Sometimes the stations just have the initial written up. Often it’s nothing at all.
There isn’t always information on the train to help you know where you are going or where you are
Some of the more modern trains have an electronic board inside each carriage which lists each station along the route and lights up to show you which station you are at. These carriages may also have an additional electronic board which shows the next station, the destination station and which line train it is. There may even be a clear tannoy system announcing the stations and which trains you can connect with at that particular station.
Is it too much to ask that all trains have an electronic board like this showing the stations?
Not all trains are modern however. If you happen to find yourself on an older train, then the tannoy will be so unclear you won’t understand a word of what is being said and there are no electronic boards. There may be a paper copy of the route pasted to the inner wall of the carriage, but it won’t necessarily be for the train you are on.
The names of the stations that are written on the map or in the stations themselves are not necessarily recognised by the journey planner on the MTA website
One thing I found really helpful was that the stations all have free Wifi. So once in a station I could connect to the Wifi and go to the trip planner part of the MTA website. The trip planner enables you to put in your start and finish stations and it will tell you which train to take, where to change and how long your journey will take.
It might say 5 Avenue on the station signage and on the map, but the app won’t recognise it.
Don’t think though, that because you’ve looked at the map or found a sign inside or outside the station with the name of the station that you can just put this into the trip planner and get a result. Doing this is likely to get you a ‘station not recognized’ response. Why? Because the website planner only accepts station names written in a specific way. One evening I found myself at 8 Street. Or so I thought. After all that’s what was written outside the station and on the map. The website wouldn’t recognise it at all though and it was only when I went down to the platform thinking I’d just have to get any train to the next station and then try again there, that I noticed some of the signs on the platform (this was a station that had plenty of signs on the platform) said 8th Street, not 8 Street, although many of them still said 8 Street. When I tried putting 8th Street into the planner it was fine. It struck me as quite bizarre that the planner wasn’t intuitive enough to offer suggestions for station names similar to the one I was trying to enter or even to recognise a station name as it is written on the signs in the station and on the map.
The reverse of this problem is when you do enter a correct station name and it offers you half a dozen options. Remember how lots of the stations have the same name? This is where you need to know the cross streets or the lines that run through the station so you can choose correctly.
Sometimes you have to leave the station to change platforms
If you find you are on the wrong train or going in the wrong direction, your instinct will be to jump off at the next station and cross the platform to get a train going the right way or back to your original station so you can pick up the train you were supposed to be on.
Ralph Street Station is one where you can change platforms without leaving the station. They’re not all like this.
Don’t do this without checking first. Some stations have no way of moving between platforms without you having to exit the station, cross the road and re-enter the station. If you need to do this and you don’t have a travel card you will have to pay again. Also bear this in mind when first entering a station. Depending on which train you want and which direction you want to travel in, the entrance you are standing in front of may not be the one for you. You may need to do the crossing the road thing first.
Stations that are like this will have the lines and destinations written up outside them. You just have to hope that what is written there matches what is written on the map or what the trip planner has told you to look out for.
You can’t buy a ticket in every station
Not all stations have ticket machines. This could be a problem if you’ve left a station to change platforms and then can’t get back in. If you have a weekly travel card you won’t need to worry about this. Alternatively you can estimate how many journeys you are likely to make and load the money onto your metro card.
The first time you buy a metro card you will pay an extra dollar for the card. After this you can just reload it when necessary without having to buy a new card each time.
There’s no such thing as a daily travel card
The best thing of course is just to have a travel card. Then you can enter and exit stations to your heart’s content. If you’re not staying for a week and you don’t think you’d get your money’s worth out of having a weekly travel card for just a few days then a daily travel card would be your answer. However, it’s not your answer because they don’t exist.
All you can do to save having to buy a new fare each time you go into the subway (assuming the station is one where you can buy a fare) is to work out in advance how many journeys you are likely to take and what that will cost and then load that amount of money onto your metro card. For example, if you assume you’re going to use the subway three times a day over the next two days then you can load the fare for six subway journeys onto your card (at the moment that would be 6 x $2.75).
Tip: if you’re paying with a foreign credit card and it asks you for your zip code just press enter.
So as you can see the New York subway can take a bit of getting used to. I was fortunate to be there for 10 days so I was able to buy a weekly travel card to start with. This meant that by the time I needed to pay for individual journeys I’d got over a lot of my confusion and wasn’t likely to make mistakes that would cost me extra.
Travelling by subway. Once you’ve figured it out, it’s just like any other metro system.
I did find that people were really helpful and would help me out with telling me where a train was going or what the station was when I was really confused. There are often signs on the edge of the platform saying which trains run from that platform and what their destinations are and the trains themselves have a sign on the side saying which line it is, where it’s going and if it’s an express or local train (don’t get an express without checking it stops at your station and doesn’t just whiz by it).
And there you have it. Remember these few quirks and you’ll be fine navigating the New York subway.
Have you used the New York subway? Are there any tips you can add to this? And do you agree with me that it’s the quirkiest metro system of all? Or have you found an even quirkier one? Share your thoughts and tips in the comments below.
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Defending Decentralization, Like a Twice in a Millennium Chance
“We haven’t had an opportunity like this in the past 500 years.”
That’s Amir Taaki speaking on a closing panel at the Web3 Summit in Berlin Wednesday, and his statement was greeted with breathless applause by the audience. An early bitcoin developer, Taaki addressed a crowd of more than a thousand coders that had gathered to discuss “Web 3.0” – or the restructuring of internet infrastructures with an emphasis on decentralization.
“Maybe the technological proposals that people are talking about are not very well grounded, but I do see a huge amount of young, idealistic people with a lot of capital,” Taaki said, adding:
“If we can form a vision and direct that energy, it could be an extremely powerful force.”
A concept which originated from ethereum co-founder and Parity Technologies founder Gavin Wood, Web 3.0 has evolved into a tech base that encompasses a wide range of decentralized technologies, ethereum and beyond.
Web 3.0 is intended to replace the existing online infrastructure with software that is decentralized from the start. To this end, much of the discussion over the three-day conference echoed Taaki’s sentiment – that with the right combination of technology and vision, Web 3.0 can usher in a new era of digital emancipation.
And while that may sound idealistic – several attendees remarked that the event seemed to tip into naïveté at times – it was met with a wave of technological advances that reinforced this positivity.
“It’s different this time around, and we have a chance to use these tools in a way that empowers and protects people,” Patrick Nielsen, CTO of Web 3.0 startup Clovyr, said. “But it won’t build itself, and just because the tools exist does not mean it’s going to get used.”
Ethereum developer Lane Rettig echoed this point in an interview with CoinDesk.
According to him, the Web 3.0 community is at a crucial turning point. Either it succumbs to the classic “rich get richer” dynamics or the community takes “the uncharted path” of permissionless innovation.
“But it’s not something we get for free, and it is not something we get by default,” Rettig contended.
What’s more, such a vision requires careful coordination and an awareness of history, such as the failure of former technological movements that got co-opted by corporates. To this end, several moments during the conference reflected this idea in more cautionary terms.
For instance, ethereum developer Vlad Zamfir took the stage on Monday, saying: “Expect every layer to be captured. Defend every layer.”
The ‘protocol commons’
During the event on Monday, Harry Halpin, an academic and a former chairperson of the World Wide Web Consortium (W3C), gave some concrete examples of the risks currently facing the nascent industry.
According to Haplin, decentralized, open-source technologies have a historical tendency to fall prey to capture by corporations that implement the tech – thus further centralizing the Web.
Clovyr’s Nielson seconded that, explaining that strategies – such as the so-called “embrace and extinguish” method – exist within corporations to allow them to take open-source software and reimplement it within their own systems (without so much as a thank you). And the tech, at that juncture, has been abstracted from its guiding principles and even be used for malignant ends, he said.
Zamfir specifically directed his warning about this process toward blockchain governance – where an economic elite can buy up crypto token ownership and divert the outcomes of a project.
According to Halpin, Web 2.0 technology underwent a corporate capture of its own, and the leaders of the projects “lacked the backbone to push back and fight for users rights.” For example, Halpin drew attention to digital rights management (DRM) – a heavily criticized copyright-enforcing technology that led him to quit the W3C following its implementation as a Web standard.
To protect against such eventualities, Halpin proposed the notion of a “protocol commons,” an overarching blockchain governance body for “certain things which are in everyone’s best interest.”
This could include the development of Web 3.0 standards, as well as protection against software patents, Halpin said, adding that such governing bodies should avoid deifying specific people, a process that can create single points of failure for blockchain projects.
As Halpin argued:
“We need to remove charismatic leaders, they are good at the beginning but they will become corrupt, or they will just go crazy, and either way it has the same impact.”
A surveillance machine
Privacy was another significant theme discussed during the summit. While much in the way of privacy tooling is in development within the cryptocurrency community, there are still plenty of unanswered questions.
Halpin called privacy protection “the largest technological task facing the Web 3.0 community.”
He continued: “Peer-to-peer and blockchain technologies are by design very hostile to privacy. There needs to be a lot of work.”
It was a notable trend at the summit, with many, like Halpin, warning that the use of peer-to-peer and blockchain technologies could result in a new surveillance machine – one that is even more threatening than the current Web as it exists today.
And that’s because not only do technologies like ethereum reveal transactional data, but they also expose subtler computational activity which can be a concern, especially as it relates to smart contracts that deal with sensitive tasks like voting, location data, social media and identity.
As Zamfir explained:
“Blockchain is a surveillance wet dream.”
Still, several talks touched on the privacy question, sparking a sense of renewed interest in developing the tools necessary to protect users and even developer information.
Advancements in zero-knowledge cryptography, ring signatures, mixnets, privacy-enforcing contracts and messaging were discussed, and even lower level cryptography that enforces privacy as a default, instead of needing end users to adopt.
One such project is Centrifuge, a financial supply chain startup that performs transactions apart from the ethereum blockchain in order to preserve their privacy, while still communicating with the blockchain by way of non-fungible tokens (NFTs).
“From a technical point of view, there’s a huge improvement in terms of the technologies we can use to preserve privacy,” CTO of Centrifuge Lucas Vogelsang said.
He added that the implementations of such technologies are “just a matter of time.”
All about freedom
Still, the mood at the conference was generally optimistic. For example, several participants pointed to innovations particular to the blockchain ecosystem that could help overcome dystopian outcomes.
Zamfir, for instance, said that stable blockchain governance can be achieved using systems that enforce distributed control, incentive mechanisms and general fault tolerance.
Halpin echoed this point by stating that Web 3.0’s main protection against the failures of former software movements is the novel economic models underpinning much of the industry.
“Blockchain technologies have a fighting chance because they have an economic model built into how you use and work on the technology,” he stated.
These economic models can help avoid outcomes like the onslaught of corporations that occurred in Web 2.0 and protect against the economic model underlying most of the internet – one that relies on user data and tracking as a primary business model.
Haplin continued:
“You can see a new route of innovation on the Web that is not based on mass surveillance, that is based on decentralization, the respect for human life and new economic models based on payments.”
Speaking on the panel, Taaki reminded the audience of the importance of having a fixed ideological position to guide the Web 3.0 movement.
And while there are subtle disagreements about what the term “Web 3.0” actually means, Zamfir said in an interview that ideology can be boiled down to “emancipation.”
“It’s not clear that it is going to be good for people’s privacy, it’s not clear that it gives people control, but it certainly gives people a lot of freedom,” Zamfir told CoinDesk.
In a similar vein, according to Halpin, while we won’t know for years as the technology and the industry around it unfolds, but it’s worth the risk, given the underlying promise – freedom from corporate control – the technology stands for.
Gavin Wood image via the Web3 Foundation
The leader in blockchain news, CoinDesk is a media outlet that strives for the highest journalistic standards and abides by a strict set of editorial policies. CoinDesk is an independent operating subsidiary of Digital Currency Group, which invests in cryptocurrencies and blockchain startups.
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The D.C. sportswriter who went from covering the Redskins to selling organic food
New Post has been published on https://usnewsaggregator.com/sport/the-d-c-sportswriter-who-went-from-covering-the-redskins-to-selling-organic-food/
The D.C. sportswriter who went from covering the Redskins to selling organic food
(Jen Dominic for The Washington Post)
STAUNTON, Va. — The tin of cookies emerged from behind his desk, three dozen or so. They were dark chocolate-cranberry-pumpkin-maple. The pumpkin came from real pumpkins, which Joseph White had acquired by asking businesses in this marvelous downtown whether they still needed their decorative Halloween gourds. The cookies were delightful.
If White had brought a baked treat like this to the Redskins Park media trailer — which he did, week after week, year after year, during some of the craziest moments in franchise history — “I’d have to hire two guards to keep [reporters] away,” he noted.
But his new colleagues are a bit different than the ones he left behind in Ashburn. Three dozen homemade cookies here last days, not seconds. He’s given up on the idea of throwing parties centered around food. And when White takes his employees out for dinner, he can pay with a $20 bill and get change. “These people just don’t eat,” he said of the staff at at Cranberry’s Grocery & Eatery.
There are other differences, too. The folks inside Cranberry’s aren’t glued to Twitter, aren’t surgically attached to their phones and don’t particularly care whether the Redskins opt for continuity or chaos this offseason. Which isn’t to say nothing changes here. On the day I visited the natural-food outpost now owned by White, he offered up a brand-new creation dreamed up by his staffers: Earl Grey rolls. Imagine a cinnamon roll dipped in bergamot oil, and served warm. They were delightful, too.
You might not know White’s name, but you’ve probably read his work or heard his voice. For about two decades, he was the Associated Press’s D.C. sports correspondent, the guy who asked the first question at most Redskins news conferences, the man tasked with describing Christmas Eve at FedEx Field for readers across the country. He wrote about Norv Turner and Marty Schottenheimer, about Steve Spurrier and Joe Gibbs, about Clinton Portis’s costumes and Sean Taylor’s death. He chronicled the return of baseball, the rise of Ovechkin and the fall of Arenas. He traveled to five Olympics, covered the National Spelling Bee as well as anyone has ever covered anything and was named the 2005 AP Sportswriter of the Year. Then he left, taking a sabbatical from the AP and buying a health-food store and restaurant 140 miles from Ashburn.
The sabbatical is over. White isn’t coming back.
How do you go from covering one of the NFL’s most chaotic franchises to selling local honey (“the greatest honey you’ll ever have”) and local kombucha (“you can feel the probiotics flow through you”) and an exclusive label of organic fair-trade coffee, while bragging that “there is not a drop of high-fructose corn syrup anywhere in the building”?
“After a while, you’re just ready for a new adventure,” White said as we munched on cookies and listened to classical music near a stack of local newspapers. (“7-Eleven Removes Gas Pumps to Allow for More Parking,” read one front-page headline.) “I was originally a theater person, then I became a radio person, then I became a writer, and now I do this. You move on to the next thing, because there’s another cool thing to do.”
If nothing else, I am consistent. First snow creature my store’s street. Meet Charley, the @GoCranberrys snow gnome. pic.twitter.com/8rulLjVjuE
— Joseph White Jr. (@JGatlinWhite) February 17, 2015
I’m not sure if this is a sports story. Maybe it’s a media story, or a retail story. There’s probably more than a little wish fulfillment involved. But I do know this: The sportswriting business once had an allure of authentic characters, one-of-a-kind types you wouldn’t meet elsewhere, people you couldn’t possibly forget. I’m sure they still exist, but they seem harder to find every year. And I promise you this: You would never forget Joseph White.
What other sportswriter would pull over on his way out of Redskins Park, set up his telescope on top of his car and observe the four moons of Jupiter? What other sportswriter would bike to Redskins Park — and then keep his helmet on while interviewing Mike Shanahan? What other sportswriter would produce logic puzzles for other writers to work on during rain delays? What other sportswriter would leave the baseball stadium and immediately go camping; or build an igloo; or travel to Edgar Allan Poe’s grave for an annual birthday vigil; or present his media-room pals with homemade pumpkin-mint-chocolate chip cookies, or butterscotch pie, or treats made with hand-picked mulberries, or a full barbecue feast brought back from North Carolina?
That one came after his father’s death. His dad had taught him that if he ever had spare change, he should do something nice for someone else. When he was tidying up his dad’s house, he found some spare change. So he brought back lunch for his friends.
On his last day covering the Redskins, the other reporters gave him a standing ovation.
“Joe really is one of a kind,” wrote former Skins beat writer Mike Jones, when I asked about White. “You could say that about a lot of people, but it really did apply to him, and his quirky ways were part of the reason why everybody liked him.”
“When I think of Joe, I think of a true original — a man who marches to a singular tune in his head,” The Post’s Liz Clarke wrote. “I think what has made him so beloved among fellow sportswriters is that unlike so many journalists, Joe rarely, if ever, complains and lacks the cynicism and pettiness that too often mars the profession.”
“We all find him endearing and gentle and down-to-earth,” former Washington Times writer Zac Boyer wrote, “but there’s also a quirkiness to him that warms your heart.”
“Joe will be missed because he’s simply a good guy,” wrote ESPN’s John Keim, “and because he liked to bake for us.”
If White didn’t act like everyone else, he didn’t write like us, either, glorying in the weirdest stories, the goofiest anecdotes, the most outlandish quotes. I always figured that’s why he reveled in covering every inch of the Spelling Bee, an event he has attended even after leaving the business. Turns out it was more than that.
“I felt like it was important to tell the stories of the Spelling Bee kids, because they get such a stereotype about them,” he told me. “Hey, this is an awesome kid who plays baseball and the violin and goes to public school — and these are the kids who are going to make a difference in the world. They’re going to be the doctors and lawyers and scientists and so forth, which is a whole heckuva lot more important than making a bunch of three-pointers.”
Arrived inBaltimore for the Poe Vigil w/ cookies for all and scorecards to judge the Faux Toasters. Join us! pic.twitter.com/IDreyw4jwP
— Joseph White Jr. (@JGatlinWhite) January 19, 2014
He didn’t dress like us, either. Former Redskins lineman Stephen Bowen — who called White “F-Dot” because of his Freddy Krueger attire — once stopped an interview, looked at White’s sweater and asked, “What the hell are you wearing? Is that sweater from 1989?” White thought about it, and told Bowen the sweater was probably five years older than that. He recently told a friend that there are three things left he wants to buy — a new telescope, a straight razor and a pair of cross-country skis — “and once I get those three things, I’ll own everything I want.”
It’s a lifestyle that helped open the possibilities of a new business adventure. White, now 54, previously had worked as a country-music DJ in North Carolina, and for AP radio in London. Nearly two decades covering Washington sports was a long time tilting at the same windmill. By the end, it felt like he didn’t need to use his tape recorder anymore; he had heard the same quotes in 1997, and 2001, and 2005; heard rookies saying how happy they were to be in Washington and optimistic coaches promising a fresh new era.
His brother had lived in Staunton for years, and White and his son loved visiting the arts-and-theater town. So out of nowhere, he e-mailed the owners of Cranberry’s, asking what retail niches in the active downtown district still needed filling. They told him they were ready to retire and suggested he just buy their store. Many months later, he did. He took a two-year sabbatical from the AP but knew pretty quickly that he wouldn’t be going back.
And so, on the day I visited, instead of chronicling the melancholic end of yet another playoff-free Redskins season, White was rejoicing about a delivery from Blue Ridge Bakery, and getting change from the bank (“you’re awesome!” he told the teller as he left), and singing showtunes from “South Pacific” with a customer-turned-friend, and getting ready to make posters for that week’s trivia night. (Introducing a weekly trivia night was one of his first innovations as store owner. He writes the questions himself.)
When protesters gather in front of the nearby courthouse, he brings them free coffee. When staffers need a break, he fills in behind the register. His favorite thing about the gig is meeting new people: the backpacker from Finland, the random late-night shopper who became one of his new best friends, the Amtrak travelers who hop off the thrice-weekly Cardinal Route, telling him about their adventures and listening to his.
He’s trying to launch an “Amazing Race”-style event in Staunton, and a program to offer low-income kids a meal at Cranberry’s, and a show at the adjacent Blackfriars theater. Many of his staffers are into the city’s thriving theater scene; one directed “Doctor Faustus,” and another directed “A Winter’s Tale.” He’s embraced Staunton’s Harry Potter festival; “we definitely have to order more chocolate frogs this year,” he noted. On Thursday night, he hosted a Solstice Bonfire.
The store and cafe were already successful before he arrived, and he mostly tries to stay out of his employees’ way — “all I did was just hop on a galloping horse,” he said. So he waters the plants and changes the light bulbs and designs the monthly placemats and tries to make the place feel like a home.
His mom ran a country store for more than two decades in rural North Carolina — that was his living room as a kid — and he wants Cranberry’s to have that same community-gathering-place appeal. He even made a replica of a sign that used to hang in her store. “You are a stranger here but once,” it reads. It feels like it.
“Why do I like this?” he said, repeating my question, as it snowed gently outside. (“It’s snowing!” he had shouted, when the first flakes appeared.)
“It’s a really cool place,” he finally answered. “I have really cool people working for me. I’ve got really cool customers. There’s not a day I turn that corner to come down here and look at the building and go, ‘Man, I don’t want to come to work today.’ I mean, there are times you could easily feel that way as a sportswriter — ‘Man, I don’t feel like going to practice today: It’s day 17 of training camp, I’d rather be home with my family.’ There’s not a day that I’ve come here where I was like, what did I get myself into?”
Mom used to have a sign like this in the country store she ran for 22 years. Figured I’d get one for @GoCranberrys. pic.twitter.com/ijJEWyiXf8
— Joseph White Jr. (@JGatlinWhite) February 11, 2015
He was talking about this general idea with Rob, his grocer, just the other day. They always banter about song lyrics and conspiracy theories and philosophy, and this time they were talking about how time is more valuable than money, because one is finite and the other isn’t. Why is that so easy to forget?
“You know, you don’t get moments back,” White said. “And I don’t know what the next adventure will be beyond this. Who knows?”
He’s having one now, though. Maybe stop in and see him if you’re ever in Staunton. Ask for the Earl Grey rolls.
More from the D.C. Sports Bog:
One fan’s thoughts on how the Redskins can improve the fan experience at FedEx Field
Carol Maloney leaves NBC Washington
After losing more than 80 pounds, former Redskin Will Montgomery’s ‘not scary anymore’
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