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#hey that's the same thing I do haha
airbenderedacted · 10 months
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IF I WERE WOY CREW I WOULD ALSO FIGHT FOR THE IMPORTANCE OF HAVING THE LESBIAN FLAG SOMEWHERE ON OR NEAR DOMINATOR IN JUST ONE WHOLE SCENE IN THE SHOW  SEND TWEET
#(maybe at the end of her character arc to avoid any  unsavoriness / unfortunate implications about her feral ass idkidk hmhjujjnfgs)#Wander Over Yonder#Lord Dominator#granted that's in the scenario where say craig is fine with ascending her lesbianism to official canon status#(currenlty it's abt on the same level of canonicity as wander's logevity/immortality. as in they're written as being but it's not OFFICIAL)#but like i feel kinda strongly about um. it's great to leave characters fully open to interpretation so that all takes can be valid#BUT i think that if the crew sees a character as one thing and goes so far as to write them as being that#then it should 100% be made official official canon bc um HEY ahjaghjsdnmds. like atp the collaboration the silent agreement THE CODING#that's!!! a lot!!!! atp it's important to confirm the rep as being meaningful to the show canon and make it official ygm#and when it's like. when it's as tiny a thing irt the overall plot/character development. you don't have to go crazy with that confirm#SLAP A FLAG DOWN & CALL IT A DAY WHO'S WITH ME haha#TOH DID IT OK K.O. DID IT NIMONA DOES IT!!!!!!! DO YOU SEE THE VISIONN#oh but speaking of making canon rep explicit. if dom were to be confirmed i would also push for a super lesbian coded NON-villain#yk just to avoid. a certain disney trope#same with the aro coding like idk if she's meant to be literally aro or not but regardless#i think woy could really use an unequivocably do-gooding good guy character who is as romance repulsed as dominator is#bc i think the show does a fine job of separating her disinterest from her evil - doing evil is evil. not liking romance is neutral#THAT MESSAGE IS THERE IMHO!!#but it doesn't do a fine ENOUGH job#i think the character who is hella unparalleled in her evilness n all that shouldn't be the only character in the show who's No Romo#anyway im getting way too rambly about.. what is literally just the discussion of TINY THINGS YOU CAN DO TO DO GOOD BY LGBT REP BUT AAAA#as much as i have to say about them in practice these would all be very tiny things and i just love how much you can say with a little#if that all makes sense#❤️
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faunandfloraas · 3 months
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inadvertently stopped using my freckle fade cream without thinking.... right around the time i started making gifs of felix.... coincidence?
#positive influence.....#i do wonder sometimes how jarring it must have been for he and lil chris to go from australia to korea#bc i copped shit for being pale and freckly as a kid#i have a core memory of this girl talia wearing a country bumpkin costume with these cartoonish freckles drawn on and she pointed at me#and was like Lol im jessie haha and i was like Okay so you want to fight??#another time had to do some speech and when i finished and had questions from my classmates and two boys just asked me why i was pale#and why they could see idk i guess my bloodvessels in my legs ??? i didnt even notice like i was just like UHHHH idk ask about my topic#had so many instances like that and they werent terrible but it did make me insecure#like in the 00s here being tan was /it/ you had to be nice and tanned- go lay in the sun and ignore we are number one in melanoma deaths#like it was so consistently the thing... prob why i have so many freckles bc i didnt tan in the sun i freckled#but in both felix and chans aus photos they were quite tanned!#so imagine going from Hey go lay in the sun and get nice and brown ya pale fucker to Do Not Do That. Be pale as a ghost#white as fuck twilight vampire printer paper ass complexion or else you arent the beauty standard must have been so...... odd#idk beauty standards are so fucked and stupid#at least for me it was just like mean it wasnt like systemic. still wasnt nice but its not damaging the same way#but yeah I imagine some of the cultural differences must have been jarring and weird#like when chan said he was glad to get sex ed in australia bc it was comprehensive here and its not something i would have thought about#but yeah he went to school here and there he would know#idk must be hard to be an idol and straddle that line of not wanting to cause any ripples but having your own ideas and beliefs#oh i'd love to talk to him off the record lmao#dont take this as anti korea sentiment btw like australia is also wack#it just must be interseting and sometimes hard...#wow these tags are long SORRY
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frecklystars · 2 months
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sorry for the long ass post but this has always my favorite scene in the entire film - for obvious reasons - and im so glad greta talked about it and the way she worded it made me laugh so hard i had tears in my eyes. haha... god. my boyfriend sobbing his eyes out over the metaphorical crusts on his patriarchy sandwich......
#i dont think ill ever love anybody quite the same way that i love Ken#because he came into my life during a time when i was like. dying. not in a haha millennial way. i was genuinely fucking dying.#he is so. special. to me. he is so... everything to me and i truly mean it every time that i say it#i miss and love him so deeply so WHOLEHEARTEDLY *EVERY* single day#and i didn't used to be able to do that anymore! but he!! HE made me feel SAFE again and thats INSANE#because i was SO UNSAFE for SO goddamn long! and the feeling of safety is STILL unfamiliar to me and foreign and horrifying#but he's constantly such a Safe character. Barbie too even moreso. and it's so refreshing after feeling Unsafe for so. long.#i spent over a year feeling like my whole world had ended and i was destined to die but then he! shows up! in my life!#and no other character was able to spark life back into my heart the way he did#AND I HAD *TRIED* I had tried so hard to get into old special interests and find new ones but NOTHING worked#i was just an empty husk. just a shell of a person having flashbacks *constantly*#feeling unsafe *constantly* suffering *constantly* every single second i was awake i was in so much pain#and then every time i'd sleep i'd have the goriest nightmares about all the abuse i was put through and all the F/Os i'd lost#but then Ken Carson plucked a star out of the sky and said 'hey sweet girl you don't know me but i miss you and love you'#'and barbie is here and im here and allan is here and everyone loves you already. we're so happy to meet you'#'and everything is gonna be okay because we've got you! we came for you! and we will fight for you!!'#and then hearing greta comment abt this scene made me laugh so hard and then it hits me. i laugh now.#i laugh so often because of This Dude. i didnt used to be able to laugh before but now i laugh like i used to#i used to say all the time about my past main F/O i had lost from abuse from an IRL person 'i will never love anyone more'#and true i will never love anyone more than i loved my starlight. but here is the thing#i will never love anyone the way i love Barbie. i will never love anyone the way i love Ken Carson#because it was IMPOSSIBLE for me to feel joy for so long and it was. THIS MOVIE that brought me back#when this movie is so full of the most specific triggers. colors. clothes. yet i push thru it every time#and its because these characters make me feel THAT safe!!!! like if i see a trigger i tell myself that's BARBIE'S Thing. and Barbie is safe#ive never ever once had a flashback during the barbie movie NOT even once even tho logically i Should. but i dont.#because these F/Os are like!!! sweet girl!!! we've got you!!! and i'm like yeah you sure do now don't ever let me go#god i cry my eyes out every single time i think about this i need to sleep LMFAO SORRY FOR THE LONG RANT#love notes#💕 I'll fight for you!! - ̗̀🐎🏖️✨ ̖́-
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musical-chick-13 · 9 months
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I want to sing through some Weird Emotions, which has the effect of me wanting to share art, but also no one perceive me ever.
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insaneillusionist · 2 years
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Someone has probably said this before but I’m going to say this again.
(This only takes lines from “No One Mourns The Wicked” because I love that song but I can use more songs later if I come back to this.)
Glinda probably views herself as wicked. She probably hates herself a bit. There’s no way she doesn’t.
In “No One Mourns The Wicked” Glinda has a line where she sings about how the truth is what the most people believe. Later in the musical, the Wizard of Oz says something similar, showing Glinda somewhat using his thinking. I’m guessing that Glinda wonders if she could have actually shown the truth had she done something different. She’s trying to rectify that now, but it’s too late. People will probably only believe that she’s wicked the same way that the Wizard of Oz is wonderful. She also says that this “truth” will outlive a lie, which we can assume means that this belief will outlive her. Glinda assumes that she is the only one left. Nessarose is dead, Fiyero’s dead, Elphaba herself is dead, she’s the only one left. She’s the only one left who knows what Elphaba was really like and that knowledge will die with her.
“The good man scorns the Wicked!”
Glinda is mourning Elphaba and doesn’t scorn her. The only person who would mourn a wicked person must be wicked themselves, at least in the eyes of the townspeople. Glinda has probably had to hear stuff like this for quite a while, so it may have changed her thoughts on herself.
“The Wicked's lives are lonely.”
In “For Good” Glinda says that she’s has a lot of friends but only one that ever mattered. She probably didn’t have many close confidants or people she could lean on. Now that one person who she thought mattered is dead. She can’t get her back. Everyone else that she was close with is gone too. She’s alone now.
“The Wicked die alone.”
Glinda’s going to die alone. There’s no one else left. And though there are people who love her, they don’t know her. She’s alone.
“It just shows when you're Wicked
You're left only
On your own.”
Same point as the last few about how Glinda is the last one left.
“The Wicked cry alone.”
Glinda has to mourn alone. Everyone else is celebrating and expects her to celebrate. She can’t be sad in the public eye.
“Nothing grows for the Wicked.
They reap only
What they sow.”
Glinda chose not to go with Elphaba. She chose to work with the Wizard and call her friend wicked. She chose to continue that. She told Boq to go with Nessarose to the dance, which unintentionally set off a lot of events, leading to Boq being forced to be with Nessa. Glinda didn’t expect this, but it still happened and she probably saw it happening. Glinda chose to tell Morrible and the Wizard how they could lure Elphaba back, leading to Nessarose’s death. Fiyero, choosing to protect Elphaba, unlike her, died doing so. He might have been alive had she protected Elphaba from the start or had successfully helped him. And Elphaba might still be alive if Glinda had joined her from the start or helped her later. Maybe she wouldn’t be dead if Glinda told the truth or hadn’t let Fiyero or Nessa die. Maybe she’d still be alive if Glinda hadn’t given away the shoes like that or had chosen to comfort her instead of fighting her over Fiyero. And while Elphaba is dead, Glinda can’t carry on her legacy in any way, because she can’t change the public’s minds and it’s probably difficult to fight for Animal rights at this point. She’s a politician who has to lie about stuff because the public will revolt otherwise and has no one to depend on. Her life is like this because of her own actions.
“Woe to those (Woe to those)
Who spurn what Goodnesses
They are shown.”
Glinda is leading this life now because she rejected many chances to make things better, the main one being rejecting Elphaba, who was actually a good person, when offered a chance to leave with her. She spent most of her life working with people who destroyed her friend’s image. She has to live like this because of those actions.
In conclusion, Glinda hates herself.
(Dear god this got long. Wow. I can say the exact same thing so many times.)
(I really need to learn how to make a read more button in mobile.)
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depresseddepot · 1 year
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sitting on the floor with all of my maladies on flash cards so I can figure out which of these motherfuckers is making me unable to do anything anymore
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n0ct0urn1quet · 2 years
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every single time i think about me and my gf i remember we've fr been together for 4 years and at face value sure it doesnt seem like long but then im just like. oh my god 4 years is a long fuckin time!!!!!1 i was 12 4 years ago!!!!!!!!! i was an entirely different person 4 years ago!!!!! god dam!!!!!!!! its just so wild to think about. in a good way ofc !!!!! its just. wow.
here i was like 3 years ago wondering if me and pepper would ever b able to meet in person n here we are current day still trying to work Something Out to meet. we have our entire thing planned out already basically too : when she moves out she's gonna go find a place n live alone for abt a month or so n then when she's ready im gona come n move with her, i know that im gonna b coming to see Her and she isnt comin up here to see me n its like. we're plannign that. 3 years ago i made a dinky little gofundme with no credit card no paypalll no Anything set up to it expecting that ppl would donate to it so that me, a 13 year old, by myself, could go see my gf allllllllll the way in texas . like we fr did not plan anything out like. at the time her house was super super Super Small n her room was tiny n she didnt have the best living situation and hell i had only known her for like a YEAR and the ppl she was living with prbably didnt know who i was at ALL so its just. idk.
but liek!!!!!!! here we are now . planning 2 meet each other . Some Time. eventually idk when. im sitting here hoping that idk i can come see her during winter break in december but i feel like thats too soon to start planning for and its a limited amount of time bc she only gets 2 weeks off of school in december n our winter breaks dont match up bc she starts winter break like a week before we do ??? but again that doesnt really matter bc im prolly not gonna be in school this year ANWYAYS. i really really hope we can do something but ouguughhh i dont know her mom n her mom doesnt know me and my mom wouldnt wanna come with us bc she has 0 interest in meeting my gf (i mean not like in a negative way she just never sounds interested when i talk to her abt pepper. like she just sits there and goes "uh huh" "mhm" "yeah" like ... i dont expect her to say anything fuckin groundbreaking but you could at least not sound bored when im talking to you about my gf of 4 years !!!!!! fuck!!!!!!!!). idk!!!!!!!! i just really wana do something. plan something. id LOVE for her to come here bc not only do i not get to leave the house and go on an airplane (airplane scary :() but ,,,,,,,,, peppor gets 2 meet,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, my kitty,,,,,,,,,, but also thas anothr thing bc originally it was suppsoed to be me AND mom going to go visit them but then we wouldnt have anyone to watch kitty and. i jst dont wanna leav ehim home alone for 2 weeks straight thatd just be HORRIBLE. he has abandonment issues already from being abandoned by my sister and suddenly being seperated from kitten, my sister's other cat, who he's known since kitten was a kitten. its just like... i dont want him to think that WE'RE going to abandon him too yknow. so rly id much rather have pepper come Here so that me n mom can be home n watch kitty n pepper can meet kitty and yeah !!!!!!!!!!!! yeah.
idk sorey for the random post!!!!!!1 im just awuauhjhbjkdnkjnklg. its so wild 2 think that me n her have been together for 4 years . like god thas a long time and honestly. i think its so ebic :] som of my most happy memories wer shared with her or came from something her n i did together and its just. its nice :]
i reemeember. singing 2 her for the first time. n i remember my voice was all Shaky bc god i was just so fuckin NERVOUS bc i think not only had that been the first time she heard me sing but ALSO i think if i remember correctly that was like one of the first times we really talked verbally?? i dont rly think we did often before that. n i remember finishing the song n she was like omg u sound so pretty and i was like aaaaa!!!!!!!!! n then she was like "yeah i muted the bot (cause we were in a discord call with a music bot in the vc so she could hear the song) so i could hear u better" AND I WAS JUST LIKE AUAUHGHGHHG WHYYY HAVING THE SONG IN THE BACKGROUND WOULDVE MADE MY VOICE SOUND 10x MORE LISTENABLE!!!!!! WHY DID YOU DO TAHT!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! HSDKJHKJHJKD,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
also man i remember jus like the . the Evolution of her voice. like cause yknow when we started talking verbally we were still jus young n i remember her voice being. like not super deep at all. not like high pitched but she sounded just. much different than how she does now. n i think like we didnt rly vc for a while (like idk a couple months or so . maybe longer?) and. god i rjust remember hearing her voice for the first time n it dropped liek 3 octaves and i was just like oh my GOD JHAJAKSKJBHJKGBKJG... n even stil 2 this day whenver i hear her voice im juts like ouuuuughghgh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,prety :]
(meanwhile i still sound the same as i did when i wasl ike 10 years old . juts slightly, VERY slightly deeper. barely noticeable though AJKJSAHJBKJLG)
n idk juts!!!!!! idk. i juts love her a lot. shit's complicated sometimes bc distance n school n general business sometimes but its cool . i dont mind waiting another however long we'll have to wait til we meet in person. who knows, it could be a mere couple of months to at the VERY least, like, 2 mor years. which isnt that bad honestly !!!!!!! like cmon. we've been together 4 years. all long distance. i have no doubt that we can go through another 2 ish years but.....if we're lucky maybe itll only b a couple months. we'll just have to see how things work out :]
@510snake i luv u,,, <:]
#sorey !!!!! ik this post is long its kinda rambly#also sory if i got any of thos memories wrong thas jus how i remeber things but i might b totally off haha#u prolly have a better memory than i do my long term memory is shiiiiiiit <3#but . yeah :]#i luv u pepor.................. my scrimbly :]#ALSO I REMember god. idk if i ever like told u this BUT#remember how i used to call u stuff like honey/hun all the time. like id jus randomly call u that sometimes-#well okay yes some of it WAS accidental like i just had an instinct to call u honey n be like 'are u okay hun' but#sometimes id do it . on purpose!!!!!!! imply because i really just wanted to call you honey and also i really . really wanted u to#do the same for me KLJAKJLKJLBJHG like i wanted to hear u call me honey n hun but i was too like Worried abt just ... asking u that#BECUASE like wouldnt it be weird ??? your gf comes to u after she's called u honey/hun accidentally and i s jus liek#'hey u should start calling me honey/hun' LIKE WOULD THAT HAVE BEEN WEIRSS??D??? GOD#anyways i smiled a lot when u said it was okay for me to just start calling u that whenver :)#and then u started calling me that too and i juts!!!!! :O :)!!!!!!!!#i remember. i think at one point we were talking abt scnearios or something like a long time ago and i think u said somthin like#'i cant wait for when we're irl and u call me hun or honey instead of using my actual name' or somthing like that . and i juts <:]#like yes im absolutely gona prolly call u honey more than i call u maria or pepper ASKLJDJKKLG
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underlying-purpose · 1 year
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I hate feeling really really depressed and nobody noticing a difference.
#haha go to counseling#oh can you do this for me and pay for this#oh sorry you know how hard it is for me even though i sit around all day doing nothing#its not like i expect or usually even want people to notice#but idk it feels really bad that its not noticable. am i not noticable? are my emotions not noticable?#i have these periods where i feel terrible and feel so tired and feel like i LOOK so tired but nobody blinks an eye#im walking around doing everything as usual and talking to people but i dont feel the same#and i hate it#theres so many things i feel so bad about right now but the worst part is that nothing is going to come of these feelings. nothing.#i just have to sit here and wait for them to blow over like usual.#while im stressed as hell having to pick up the fucking slack#yes i can and yes i will and yes i know#but do YOU know??? would you want to? would you care.#thats all.#vent#vent post#and i know some of this is because im running out of my depression pills#but these feelings are still real. ive been having them regardless. im just more upset because of it#i forgot one of tumblrs functions but im missing some tags that said:#hey can you help me do this or hey can you pay for that or hey sorry haha you know how hard it is for me even though i sit around all day#even though most of my time is spent working or trying to earn money through my art that barely garners enough interest to work#like yes i can and will and know but why does it feel like if i asked or dis the same things you wouldnt care?#i want help. i need help. im WILLING to help you. why do i have to reach out so far for your help when i walk up and catch you when you#just barely trip. i reach to you before you reach to me 9 times out of 10. do the fucking same for me god dammit#AND#dont be like because i know#i know i know i know i know i know#i know#i just want acknowledgement#its all i want
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im still amazed by how much i ended up hating s/eteth lmao
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artofapeach · 2 years
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what do you think of alex brightman?
Disclaimer, because all internet opinion posts need this apparently: I actively work to NOT have parasocial relationships with people. I constantly remind myself that these people are HUMAN and they can and will make mistakes. I realize that they are not my friends or my personal enemies, I simply like their work and what they do. You may not believe me, but I can’t say that I didn’t try.
*screenshots so I don’t have to type that out again*
Kay now that we got that out of the way
I FUCKING ADORE HIM
I love Alex so much, every time I hear his voice I get all giddy inside~
I remember first coming across him with the A Little Bit song in the I Could Use a Drink album. I was like, “Hey this is a nice song with a cool message!” I listened to it now and again.
Then Helluva Boss eps 2 came out and I fell in love with Robo Fizzarolli’s voice. It was so gravelly and demonic but also soothing? And I remember people going “OMG Beetlejuice!” But I didn’t know the Beetlejuice musical back then, so I was just like, “okay this is a guy to keep an eye on”.
Then like a year later, I actually did come across a Beetlejuice song (Say My Name, of course) and was like “Yo! This is awesome!!” and set out to obsess over that musical for 2 weeks (if anyone cares about my original stories, Ghost Demon Pink is pretty much inspired by it :3)
THEN I was like, “wait a min, didn’t people mention this guy in HB?” and I checked and I was like “OMG ITS HIM”
THEN I finally paid attention to his name and was like “wait Alex Brightman, I know him” and searched his name in my music and found the A Little Bit song and was like “OMG ITS HIM”
So yeah there were kinda three different times I was introduced to him?? wwwww At that point, it was impossible for me to not consider myself a fan of his work and I started looking into other things he does. He’s just…he’s so positive and cheerful, it makes me happy and want to be more cheerful in my life too :)
I have yet to see him on stage, but I heard rumors of Beetlejuice going on tour maybe? In the next year or so? So I’m keeping my eye out for that 👀
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sysig · 8 months
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Your tastes are skewed, you know that? (Patreon)
#Doodles#Original#Make her stop turning out cute. Knock that off I keep wanting to show off how cute she is lol#I think I'm kinda leaning into the idea that the stitches and lack of stitches are canon - kinda a Webkinz thing y'know?#Real creature and plushie at the same time#Which ties into her existence! She's another one of my 4th-wall aware characters! They're the most long-lasting around here lol#Cory - Bar - even Mint to a lesser degree (which hey! She's aware of him! As evidenced in that last one haha we'll get there)#But yeah so while she's got the stitches - very cute but I don't always remember them lol - she's a plush bear#And while they're gone she's a theoretical living plush - unbound by physics and all that - so still not a Bear but also not an object#Starting to finalize her design here hopefully lol#A sleek design suits her I think#I also can't decide on the size of her ears - smaller ears would better reflect her as a bear but the larger ears are really cute#She's definitely not a mouse or a bunny but hm! It's cute! Darn! Lol#She also fits into the category of ''appears cute - is Weird'' along with Friend Shape and Charm haha#Charm's a villain so that much is easy and Friend Shape is regular unhinged they're fine#She's not really interested in either of them outside of being like ''Generic Cute'' - those are her sentiments not mine lol#She's allowed to have different tastes than me#Especially considering how much I'm so often so done with Mint and she's very interesed in him lol#Again partially to do with his 4th wall status but if that were the case she'd be much more interested in Cory and Bar!#She's only kinda interested in Bar and basically not at all with Cory - they'd get along tho lol they'd be good friends I think#But no she likes Mint because of his character type :P Thanks Cure very helpful lol
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the-moon-dealer · 27 days
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yb-five · 9 months
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If my Twitter (absolutely not calling it by its new name btw) wasn’t suspended for no good reason I would seriously consider putting my finished nrb stuff on there but alas
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danveration · 3 months
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Sleep well, amour Pt. 2
Parings: Alastor x reader
Summary: After falling asleep to his voice, you wake up and get confronted by Alastor. Later, you walk in on him sleeping.
Word count: 1523
Warnings: Mention of Alastor eating and k*lling a deer
part one
A/N: PART TWO IS HERE!!! I had SO many options wracking my brain on where to take this, but I picked this one! I hope you all enjoy it :’) let me know if you have any feedback, I’d love to hear it. Also, I’m currently working on all the requests I got :) as well as part 2 to that-no-good-first-man-on-earth
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You wake up, blinking and looking around. Momentarily forgetting where you are.
Shit. You fell asleep in Alastor’s recording room. Thankfully, he isn’t here right now.
Before you could get up, you notice a purple blanket on you. It seems to be the one that was on his coat hanger. Did Alastor put this on you..? The thought has you smiling and your cheeks reddening.
Alastor’s voice sure does have an effect on you. You look outside to see what time it is, but remember that it’s Hell and the sky is always the same shade of red. You’re going to have to get used to that.
Getting up, you put the blanket back on the hanger and look around some more. It feels some-what intimate right now to be in his space when he’s not around. You wonder how long you’ve been asleep for.
You walk over to his table and notice a red “play” button on his radio equipment and are tempted to press it. It surely won’t cause any harm to hear what he was talking about when you were asleep. You press it and listen.
“Haha! For any sinner, I know it’s a tempting question. But I-“ The recording fast forwards. “Nevertheless, I find it quite amusing that this technology box thinks he is on any sort of level to me! Call me crazy but the sinners have been taaallkinggg, and they think he sounds quite obsessed.” He laughs, knowing Vox is probably listening.
You smile at his voice and find it funny how he is a bit of a drama queen when it comes to his radio broadcasts. You know deep down he doesn’t actually care about the whole situation with Vox, but it’s still funny how he entertains it.
Looking to your right, you see a mug that has “Oh Deer” written on it. There seems to be a bit of black coffee still left in the mug. The “deer” reference made you giggle. You’ve always wondered about his past and how exactly he is part deer anyhow. Oh well, It’ll reveal itself with time.
You’re looking at all the other buttons on his equipment, wondering what they do, when all of a sudden you hear light footsteps on the other side of the door. It’s most likely Alastor. Nobody would willingly go to his room without permission.
The door opens slowly and in steps Alastor. You notice how he opened the door quietly, to not make make much noise. As he still assumed you were asleep. You smiled at that.
He looks ahead and sees you, immediately smiling. “Ah! My dear. You’re awake!” He claps his hands together, his cane leaning on his side.
“Hey Al. Um.. about what happened I-“ You start.
“Ah, ah! No need to explain yourself, sweetheart! Don’t go giving yourself a headache.” He cuts in and laughs.
He looks down at you and says, “you just find comfort in my voice, don’t you?” He asks, with a smug smile.
Your eyes go wide and you stutter. Of course it wasn’t the most secretive thing. Still, you didn’t think he actually knew.
“U-um. Well..” You say.
He tilts his head to side as if saying, “Go on…”
There’s really no getting out of this. Plus, you don’t think Alastor would actually care. He’d probably just find it funny.
“Yeah, I do.” You admit. “I find comfort in your voice, of course I do! I just.. I don’t know.”
You aren’t sure what to say, it’s a tad embarrassing.
Alastor begins to laugh.
“I certainly could tell! I find it quite amusing if I do say so myself.” He says.
He definitely doesn’t mind it, he has a soft spot for you. But he’s also a bit confused on why you even do. He knows his radio voice is unique, but nobody ever commented on it bringing them comfort. They usually scream and run away when they hear him. You’ve been there long enough to see him kill and do so many things that people describe as “horrible, satanic, terrifying” but you still find comfort in him nevertheless? He thinks it’s absolutely adorable!
“Amusing?” You ask.
He nods and says, “Amusing, darling! I mean.. you know who I am, do you not?” He laughs and continues. “Though you still find comfort.. now that’s an interesting fact, don’t you think?”
You shy away, looking anywhere but him. You’re comfortable around him, of course, but you’re a tiny but embarrassed of this whole situation. You know he is definitely loving his though.
He places a finger on your jaw and guides your head back to look at him.
“Uh, uh, dear. There’s no need to feel shy! I never said it was a bad thing. I’m truly honoured!” He says, smiling down at you.
You and him have been getting to know each other for a while now and you’ve just been going deeply and deeply more interested in him. You almost laugh at yourself because you sometimes act as if you did when you alive, how you obsessed over fictional characters and “fan fiction.”
You look at him and say, “Well, that’s good then.” You chuckle.
“Mm, it is isn’t it?” He says.
He thinks you’re absolutely pathetic, but in a good way. He wouldn’t let anything hurt you, this new sensation is something he never wants to get rid of.
———————————————————————
Later that day, Charlie wanted you to pass a message on to Alastor about the hotel reservations. You knew he was in his room because he mentioned that if you needed him, he’d be in there having some dinner (aka, deer). Which he has in his half room half forest. You really wonder how on earth he even did that. The wonders of being a radio demon!
You’re at his door, lightly knocking. You wait a few seconds but you don’t hear anything from the other side.
“Al?” You question while knocking again.
“Hm.” You think.
You aren’t sure if you should go in or not. Sure, the thing Charlie told you about could wait but you also wanted to make sure he was okay. What if he.. choked or something? You’re sure the radio demon could handle that but you just want to make sure.
“Al, I’m coming in.. okay?” You say while knocking once more.
You slowly twist the knob and push the door open. Peaking in, you see him on the other side of the room, in a chair.
“Alastor, are you alr-“ You stop yourself when you notice his eyes are closed.
Closing the door behind you, you walk up to him.
He’s currently sitting in the chair, his arm on the table and his head resting on his hand. He looks so peaceful. His mouth isn’t smiling and his face just looks so.. relaxed. You’ve never saw him like this before. He mumbles occasionally and his ears twitch every so often as he sleeps. You aren’t sure how he finds this position comfortable, but you smile at it nonetheless.
You don’t want to disturb him so you leave, now relaxed that you know he’s okay.
Right before you grab the knob of the door, you hear, “Y/n?”
You whip your head back and you see him standing up, looking at you with his smile.
“Did you need something, dear?” He asks, as if he wasn’t just dead asleep a second ago.
Of course, it makes sense he is a light sleeper.
“O-oh, no. Charlie just wanted me to tell you that the renovations went well and that the guys who inspect the place will be here tomorrow!” You say. “Sorry if I disturbed you.”
“Ahh, alright! And nonsense! You couldn’t disturb me.” He says.
You look at him and smile.
“You know, you could join me if you want! I was just resting and then going to have some dinner.” He offers.
You perk up but then remember that Husk assigned you a task of picking up crates of whiskey for the bar.
“Shit, sorry. I can’t. I have to go get more alcohol for the bar.” You say with a frown.
“More? If I remember correctly, we just got new shipments in.. last week?” He says with a laugh. “Though I’m not surprised we ran out again. Husker is a busy man. Well, my dear. Some other time, then!”
You notice him looking back into the forest, eyeing a deer.
“Yeah, some other time.” You smile. “Have a good dinner, Alastor!”
He smiles back at you says, “Oh I will.” He chuckles, his radio eyes making an appearance as he looks back the deer.
“You have yourself a lovely day, sweetheart!” He says with a wave.
“You too!” Waving back, you then open the door and leave. Once you leave you hear shrieking on the other side of the door, definitely the deer that Al was eyeing.
You’re excited to have more encounters with him, and even take him up on the dinner offer! You remember him mentioning he wanted to introduce you to his friend, Rosie. You’re looking forward to it.
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johannestevans · 9 months
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you know, one thing that i found extremely refreshing about the Barbie movie is how much it doesn't hate men or masculinity, and instead positions compulsory masculinity as similarly limiting and imprisoning as femininity when it's societally enforced
and i've been really surprised by how many people who have been going "this movie is anti-men, and that's GREAT" when like. it's not anti-men. it's opposed to patriarchy and toxic masculinity, but it extends a great deal of compassion to individual men
not just to magic ken and sugar daddy ken and allan and the other rejected kens, but even to stereotypical ken, who like. causes a lot of the problems in barbieland and leads it. it extends a great deal of empathy for his sense of powerlessness and loneliness
and it would have been very easy for the film to basically just call him an incel and punish him for what he's done by disenfranchising him even further, but it doesn't do that? it says, hey. you need more to your identity than your gender, and there's more to you than being str8
and that's exactly the same weight of the message communicated to barbie, that there's more to her identity than her gender, that there's more to her than her perfect appearance and performance
neither of them have to just be dolls
idk, i enjoyed it as a well-crafted film without finding it like, hugely artistically impactful on me, but that aspect of its gender commentary was incredibly refreshing, and far more nuanced than i'm used to expecting of cisgender creators
and i think it's a real shame for people to interpret that very carefully crafted arc for ken and the other kens and allan as "haha, this movie HATES men and thinks they're STINKY" when like. a lot of work was done to go beyond that sort of very easy reflexive hatred
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waitimcomingtoo · 24 days
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Just to Learn That You Never Cared
Pairing: Peter Parker x reader
Synopsis: always leaving class together to go fight crime leads people to think you’re dating when in reality you’re barely even friends. That is, until you agree to fake a relationship to keep your secret life a secret
requested/idea by @usoppsstar
Masterlist
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“Oh, hey. Your girlfriend left this in class.” One of Peter’s classmates said as he tossed Peter a hoodie.
“Oh. Thanks.” Peter said before realizing what the person had said. He turned the hoodie over in his hands and recognized it as yours. His face warmed up in a blush when he realized you had just been mistaken for his girlfriend. He shoved the hoodie into his bag and wondered if he should tell you or not.
Peter saw you later that night on a rooftop you frequented often. You were in your suit, as was he, but had your mask sitting beside you. You were munching on a bag of chips and wordlessly extended them to him when he landed on the rooftop beside you. He smiled graciously and took a few before sitting down next to you. Your knees were touching but neither of you moved away.
“You left this in physics, dingus.” Peter said and handed you your hoodie.
“Oh, thanks. We had to run out of there so fast to save that lady. I must’ve left it behind.” You smiled gratefully and pulled it over your head. Peter felt bad that his high tech suit had built in heaters and your homemade suit was probably leaving you freezing every night. He wanted to suggest sharing his warmth, but he didn’t want to overstep.
“I know. Thank God she called the police on those kids for selling lemonade without a permit. I’m really glad we left a test to go witness that heinous crime.”
“It’s not all bad. We did get to see the cops arrest her for wasting their time by making a fake police report, which is always satisfying. And the kids gave us free lemonade. But I think calling it “homemade” was bullshit. I know Minute Maid when I taste it.” You replied, making Peter chuckle.
“You’re right. Both those things were enjoyable.” Peter agreed. “But I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I feel like we have to leave class every other day.”
“I know. Why did we have to pick a college in such a Karen ridden neighborhood?” You sighed.
“Because we wanted to go to the good school with the good science program. We should’ve known the neighborhood would be full of bored housewives who call the police whenever they have a minor complaint. It was our own hubris.”
“It was.” You chuckled and said looked over at him. You exchanged soft smiles before you looked over at the city horizon. Peters eyes never left you and he cleared his throat to get your attention.
“So, uh, my aunt and I were gonna get Chinese food later. At the place that got shut down for being a front for money laundering but that was really just a front for a second Chinese food chain.”
“Oh, I love that place.”
“Yeah. It’s great.” He nodded. “Anyways, you should totally come-“
Peter was cut off by the police radio he wired to his phone going off. He rolled his eyes and checked what the alert was.
“Damn it. Robbery at the bakery on 9th.” He told you.
“Lowkey, I’d do the same. Their cream puffs made me cream.” You said as you put your mask back on.
“Haha, yeah.” Peter chuckled. “Wait, what?”
“You should get some sleep. I’ll handle the robbery. But I’ll catch you tomorrow, Parker. Get home safe.” You saluted him before falling backwards off the building.
“I love you too.” Peter sighed.
“Did you say something?” You asked and popped back up.
“No.” Peter quickly lied.
“Okay. Well, see you tomorrow.” You waved to him and disappeared again. Peter let out another sigh before swinging home.
The next day, you ran after one of your classmates once class was let out.
“Hey, Carly. I emailed you my notes from the class you missed.” You told her.
“Thank you so much. You’re a life saver.” She replied. “Oh, and could you tell your boyfriend that band practice is in the gym today?”
“Yeah, sure. No problem.” You agreed. She was about to walk away when you realized what she had said.
“Wait, what am I saying?” You wondered. “Who’s my boyfriend?”
“You know. That guy with the prescription shoes.” Carly answered. You tilted your head in confusion until you realized you knew exactly who she was talking about.
“Wait, Peter?” You laughed in surprise. You expected her to laugh too and reveal she was just kidding but she looked completely serious.
“Oh, right. Peter. Why do I always think his name is Timmy?” Carly wondered.
“Because he looks like a Timmy. He gets it all the time.” You waved your hand. “And his shoes are not prescription. He just bought women’s platform shoes because he wanted to be taller and didn’t think anyone could tell.”
“We can.” Carly mumbled.
“I know.” You agreed. “But, I’m getting off topic. Timmy is not my boyfriend. I mean, Peter is not my boyfriend.”
“Whatever label you guys use, can you tell him that wind ensemble is meeting in the gym instead of the choir room? The sopranos kicked us out again to practice or do drugs or something.” Carly explained. You furrowed your eyebrows at her and tried to figure out if she was joking or not.
“The label? I’m so lost. Who told you that Peter’s my boyfriend?”
“Nobody told me.” She shrugged. “Everyone just knows that you guys are a couple.”
“Well how would they know something that isn’t true?” You asked and folded your arms.
“I mean, it’s not like you guys try to keep it a secret. Between all the whispering and staying close by each other. Plus you’re always sneaking out of class together or showing up late. And if one of you is absent, the other always is too. It’s been like that since high school. People just put two and two together I guess. Why, did you want to to be secret?”
“I didn’t want it to be anything. We’re not even dating.” You insisted and felt like you were going crazy.
“You don’t have to deny it.” Carly laughed. “I know feelings are weird and gross and stuff and you’ve never been the relationship type, but I think this guy is good for you. He brings something out in you. I don’t know. But you guys are cute. I love seeing the nice loser and assertive pretty girl troupe in real life.”
“Oh. Well, thank you.” You calmed down momentarily and smiled a little. Carly walked away and your smile quickly faded when you remembered what she had said. You looked around the hallway and saw another student holding an instrument.
“Hey. Band nerd.” You called out to him.
“Me?” He asked and pointed to himself.
“Yes, you. You had to let go of your saxophone case to point to yourself. Have you seen my boyfriend today?” You asked him.
“Peter? I haven’t seen him since yesterday in-“
“That sentence better not end with “wind ensemble” or I’m gonna lose it.”
“It was wind ensemble.” He said quickly.
“I’m leaving.” You shook your head and walked away from him. You pulled out your phone and went straight to your schools “campus sweethearts” page on instagram. Sure enough, there was a picture of you and Peter sitting next to each other right at the top of the page. You had your head thrown back laughing at something he was saying and he was looking at you fondly. You let out a shocked gasp and before walking out into the courtyard to look for Peter. You spotted him on a bench and smiled.
“Yes. Thank you, small campus”. You pumped your fist and went to sit next to him.
“Oh, hi. I was just thinking about you-“
“Someone is spreading a horrible rumor about you.” You cut him off.
“Oh no.” Peter frowned. “What is it? Is it bad?”
“Horrible.” You shook your head. “Peter, they’re saying you’re in wind ensemble.”
“Oh, I am.” Peter shrugged.
“Huh?”
“I play the clarinet . See. Clarinet.” Peter said and lifted up his little black clarinet case.
“Huh?” You said louder.
“I used to play in high school, pre-bite but post 9/11. I saw a flyer for orchestra on campus so I joined.”
“And you didn’t tell me?�� You practically shouted. Peter knew you weren’t happy but felt strangely honored that you were so upset over him not telling you something about her personal life.
“Because I know how you feel about band nerds.” He replied. “And you and I don’t really talk about non-work related things. I didn’t think you’d care.”
“Are you kidding me? Of course I care.” You insisted. “My rumored boyfriend has been in wind ensemble this whole time and I didn’t even know?”
“Wait, rumored boyfriend? Who, me?” Peter asked in surprised.
“So you didn’t know about this either?”
“No. I mean, someone did refer to you as my girlfriend the other day but I thought it was just an accident. People think you and me are dating?” Peter asked and tried not to look as pleased as he felt.
“Apparently. I’ve had multiple people refer to you as my boyfriend today. And look. We’re on the campus couples Instagram page.” You said and held up your phone.
“Ew. We have one of those?” Peter grimaced and took your phone to see the picture better.
“Yeah. I honestly think the principle runs it.” You replied. Peter was quiet as he stared at the picture for a while.
“What?” You wondered.
“Nothing. This just a cute picture of us. And I think the only picture of us.” He said with a shy smile. You frowned and looked at the picture again before realizing he was right.
“Carly said people think we’re dating since we’re always sneaking off together.” You told him. Peter thought out this for a minute and then made another connection.
“Ohhhh.” He said and nodded his head.
“What?”
“This explains why the boys congratulated me on the bus back to New York after the Washington monument trip for losing my virginity at a historic landmark.”
“You lost your virginity on that trip? To who?” You whispered harshly and felt jealousy burning through your veins.
“You, apparently.” He laughed. “You and I disappeared to get the glowy alien egg bomb thing back and I guess everyone assumed we were off desecrating a national monument.”
“Oh my God. That was like 3 years ago.” You realized. “People have thought we were dating this whole time? We need to put a stop to this.”
“Yeah. You’re right. Or…” Peter trailed off and gave you a look.
“Or?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Or, we lean into it.” He suggested. “We let people think it. We encourage it, even.”
“Why would we do that?”
“People have been suspicious about where we go and what we’re doing since high school. We can only fake so many illnesses and I ran out of grandparents to lie about the death of by junior year. So if people already made up a reason, maybe we should let them think that. We don’t have to go out of our way to confirm it but we can keep the assumption going to keep them from finding out what we’re really doing.”
“So you think we should let people think we’re dating so they stop wondering about what we’re always off doing?”
“That’s exactly what I just said, yes.” Peter nodded.
“Hey. Be nicer to your fake girlfriend.” You said and smacked his arm.
“I’m sorry. I will.” Peter blushed and rubbed his arm. You felt bad for hitting him and wrapped both arms around him to rub them up and down. He smiled softly at you and you sat in comfortable silence for a moment.
“You play the clarinet?” You asked after a minute.
“Squidward made it look so cool.” Peter shrugged.
“Did he?” You asked, making Peter laugh.
“No.” He admitted.
The next day, you and Peter walked to school together with the understanding that from then on out, you were going to play the part of a happy couple. You weren’t going to go around announcing it to everyone or anything. You just needed to convince the few that didn’t already believe the rumor and confirm things for the ones who did believe it.
“You ready for this?” You asked Peter as you stepped into campus.
“I think so. Maybe we should hold hands or something. You know, since people think we’re dating.” Peter suggested and tried to make it sound like it didn’t matter to him.
“I guess so.” You shrugged and held out your hand. Peter eagerly took your hand and took note of the way it fit in his like it was made for him.
“This is weird.” You whispered to him, popping his bubble.
“Why? Are my hands sweaty?” He panicked.
“No. Just really, really hot.” You told him. “It’s just weird that nobody seems to care that we’re holding hands right now.”
“I mean, we are just two random people with almost no social presence.”
“That’s true. I guess I just thought people would care more.” You admitted as you looked around the campus. No one was phased by you and Peter, but he was too busy enjoying the moment to realize it.
“Are you disappointed?” He asked you.
“Yeah. I wore my best bra because I thought I’d be getting more attention today.” You frowned and adjusted the strap of your bra.
“It’s okay. I’ll take one for the team and stare at your boobs.” Peter assured you.
“Aw. Thank you.” You gushed and gave his hand a squeeze.
You got to your physics class and sat together at your usual lab table. Peter looked around the classroom while you carried on as usual.
“Maybe I should put my arm around you. You know, to really convince people.” Peter suggested with a shy blush on his face.
“Is that really something people do?” You genuinely wondered. “I feel like I never see couples with their arms around each other.”
“Actually, I don’t think I have either. But let’s try it anyway.” He said and wrapped an arm around you. You scooted closer to him so that you could comfortably lean into him. You quickly realized you didn’t hate it and let out a content sigh.
“Hm.” Peter made a little noise at the back of his throat.
“What?” You asked him.
“Our height difference makes this hurt my shoulder.” He leaned over to whisper in your ear.
“Then move your arm.” You whispered back.
“I can’t. I just wrapped it around you. It’ll look weird if I immediately take it off.” Peter said as he covered behind him to see who was looking.
“Or, consider this. Nobody in this entire city, and dare I say world, cares where your arm is right now.” You whispered harshly.
“Fine. I’ll remove it. But I have to give a reason.” He told you before loudly clearing his throat.
“Ah. Sorry, babe. I can’t cuddle you right now. My arm is sore from band practice.” Peter said loud enough for everyone in the classroom to hear him. You hung your head in shame and heard people murmuring about his strange comment.
“Oh God.” Peter gulped. “People are looking. They’re gonna know something is up. I have to put it back.”
He went to put his arm back around you but you stopped him before he could draw any more attention to the two of you.
“Just do this.” You whispered to him and pulled his stool closer to you and turned towards him a little. Your knees and were touching and you were now facing each other.
“That’s it? No one can even see this.” Peter said in disappointment. He thought being your fake boyfriend would bring you guys closer but you were sitting the way you always sat in class.
“It’s not about what people can see. It’s about proximity.” You explained. “We’re sitting closer together than anyone else is without being egregious about it. It’s a simple touch. If we’ve been together as long as people think we have, we don’t need to be wrapped around each other all the time. A simple touch to let the other know we’re there is all we need.”
Peter was silent as he stared at you following your explanation. He stared for so long that you felt yourself blush under the eye contact.
“What?” You asked him.
“I like the way you explain things.” Peter said simply. You quickly looked down so he wouldn’t see the effect that comment had on you and took a moment to collect yourself.
“It’s just something I thought of.” You shrugged.
“I know. But I never would have thought of that. Especially not as naturally as it did for you. You’re so quick.”
“Thank you.” You laughed shyly and found yourself unable to look away from him. Peter opened his mouth to say something to keep the momentum rolling but his phone interrupted him.
“Shoot. Sus-tivity on the b bridge.” He whispered.
“What the hell does that mean?” You asked at full volume.
“It means there’s suspicious activity on the Brooklyn bridge.” He rolled his eyes. “We have to act fast so I didn’t have time to say the whole thing.”
“But you just said the whole thing. And the abridged version. So it took twice as long.”
“Shh.” He waved his hand. “We gotta go.”
You reluctantly collected your things and took Peter’s hand to pull him out of his seat. Peter followed you out the classroom but the teacher cleared her throat when you walked by.
“And where are you two going?” She asked. You and Peter exchanged looks as the class snickered and murmured their theories about what exactly you were heading off to do.
“I’m sorry, Dr. Pepper. My girlfriend and I have to leave class unexpectedly. Please excuse us. It’s urgent.” Peter’s said politely.
“I bet it’s urgent, Parker.” A boy snickered, making serval classmates laugh.
“Gross.” You wrinkled your noses and looked at the boys in disdain.
“Fine.” The teacher sighed. “The only reason I don’t write you two up for skipping so often is because you somehow have the best grades in the class. Go on. Just get the homework done.”
“We will.” You assured her before leaving the room with Peter. Peter noticed that you didn’t drop his hand even when you were alone in the hallway.
“Hey, you know that teachers name is Dr. Zhang and not Dr. Pepper, right?” You asked him.
“Oh my God.” Peter gasped. “Is it really? I’ve emailed her so many times and said “Dear Dr. Pepper”. We have to drop out.”
You laughed and held his hand the rest of the way out of the building.
That night, Peter laid in his bed with his phone held close to his face. He had been trying to figure out what to text you to let you know he had been thinking of you.
“I had fun fighting crime with you today” He wrote out. He read it over before scrunching his nose.
“No. Too cringe. She is not gonna fall in love with someone that says “fighting crime”. I’m not Paw Patrol.” He said like it was obvious. He deleted his text and thought of another one.
“I had a good time today, we make a good team” He wrote out instead. He read it a few times until he found issue with it.
“Oh, you had a good time stopping those break dancers that were obstructing that Sbarro? That’ll catch her attention.” Peter said sarcastically and deleted the text.
“have a goodnight :)” He typed out and then shook his head.
“No. Wayyyy too horny.” He sighed and deleted it again.
“night” He wrote out and read it a few times.
“This is good. I can work with this.” He nodded. He was about to workshop it when a text from you popped up.
“pick a color” It said. Peters heart skipped a beat at the vague message and replied with the first color that popped into his head.
“blue”
“thank u” You wrote back within seconds. Peters heart stopped pounded and the disappointment that the conversation was over settled in. After all these years of fighting crime together, you two never really managed to make it past the coworkers stage. He was desperate for more but never knew how to get there.
“no homo but I had fun fighting crime with you today” You suddenly texted again. A smile tugged at Peter’s lips and he touched his as if it were your face.
“ok paw patrol” He wrote back. Back in your room, you were laughing at his text and trying to think of a witty reply.
“ur mad bc you know I’m the chase 🐶” You texted him.
“if ur the Chase then who am I?”
“plssss ur such a marshall” You wrote back.
“but that’s the third most important dog :(“ Peter replied.
“well yes but he’s cute and wears red so the little paw patrol shoe fits” You answered. A blush painted Peters cheeks over you calling him cute but he didn’t want to read too much into it.
“Im wearing red right now😳” He texted back.
“oh I bet you are” You answered, making him laugh. He kept the conversation going for about an hour before duty called once again. Peter groaned and put his suit on before swinging to the scene of the crime. He met you there and stopped the crime before stopping on a nearby rooftop to rest.
“These burglars aren’t very considerate of our sleep schedules. Who robs a Jersey Mikes after midnight? Or, like, ever?” Peter huffed as he tugged his mask off.
“I know. They’re always at inconvenient times. I was in the middle of painting my nails.”
“Can I see?” He asked in a soft voice. You pulled your gloves off and held out your hand for him to see.
“Look. Blue. But I only got half way through before Mike’s was targeted.”
“It’s okay. They still look pretty.” Peter complimented you with a soft smile.
“Thanks. You picked a good color.” You replied.
“What do you mean?” He frowned.
“I told you to pick a color. This is why.” You explained and held out your hand again. His eyes lit up at this new information and he took your hand to see your nails closer.
“You let me chose your nail color?” He smiled fondly.
“Well I didn’t know what to chose so I thought I’d ask the audience.” You shrugged and felt shy all of the sudden.
“Oh. And I’m the target audience, huh?” Peter smirked and turned towards you.
“I never said target.” You teased him and shoved him shoulder.
“I must be hearing things, then.” He shrugged as you both smiled.
“Yeah. Must be.” You said in a soft voice as you stared into his eyes. Peter gulped before making a bold move and taking your hand again under the guise of looking at your nails.
“Look at you. You even got my favorite shade.” He noted.
“You like “Eating For Blue”?” You pretended to gasp.
“Is that really the name of the color?” He laughed.
“Uh huh. It was apart of Essie’s baby fever collection. I almost chose “All In Blue Time” but that’s one tends to get little air bubbles and they give me agida. And I used to have “A Dream Come Blue” but it rolled under the sink so it belongs to the dust bunnies now.” You shrugged as you checked out your nails.
“Wow. This is all new information to me. So, are all nail polish colors named after puns and wordplay?” He asked as he stared into your eyes. He didn’t really care, but he was finally getting somewhere with you and didn’t want it to end.
“In my experience, yes. Not always color related wordplay but always something that makes you go yeah, I guess this shade of beige is what the word “ladylike” would be as a color.”
“This is blowing my mind right now.” Peter chuckled.
“You mean blue-ing your mind.” You corrected and tapped the side of your head.
“I think you inhaled too many of those fumes. Because that was not funny.” Peter said through a laugh.
“What?” You pretended to be offended. “You’re literally laughing right now. I’m so funny.”
“You are.” Peter admitted when his laughter died down. You stared into eyes for a minute before smiling.
“Is that what you rumored saw in me?” You asked him.
“Probably.” He chuckled. “I also heard a rumor that I think you’re really pretty. Like, the prettiest girl I was ever rumored to have allegedly seen.”
“Now you’re the one who’s looney from the fumes because that’s a straight up lie. I know you’ve seen prettier girls because I was standing right next to you when Anne Hathaway left that diner.” You said without making eye contact with him. Things were moving a little too fast and you needed it hit the brakes for a second.
“Oh, yeah. You’re right.” Peter forced a laugh and awkwardly looked over at the cityscape when he realized you were politely telling him to pull back.
“But I appreciate it.” You said after a beat of silence.
“Of course. Sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking saying that.” He laughed nervously. “I was just getting caught up in the fake dating. We’ve been doing it for so long that it felt real.”
“We only started this morning.” You reminded him.
“Right. Well, it’s late. I’m gonna go home.” He said quickly and stood up. He had just blown that and needed to leave as quickly as possible.
“Okay. Goodnight. See you at school.” You called after him. Peter swung home with tears in his eyes and went straight to bed, missing your text about having fun fighting another crime.
The next day at school, Peter decided to start over and push last night from his mind. He played the part of your boyfriend to the best of his abilities and opened every door, pulled out every seat, and carried ever book for you all day long. Then he did it the next day, and the day after that. He kept his mouth shut about his feelings day in and day out no matter how painful it was getting. You and Peter had finally moved past the coworker stage and become real friends so he didn’t want to sabotage it all by telling you that he spent his days wishing for more.
“What are your plans tonight?” You asked him one day as you walked out of class together.
“My aunt is going out with her friends so I was probably gonna watch a movie on my couch. But on my laptop with my earbuds in. Likely in my boxers. Likely with an entire package of Twizzlers. Why?”
“Well I was gonna suggest that we hang out but you sound booked.”
“Really? You want to hang out?” Peter asked with much more enthusiasm than he intended.
“If you want. I’m not doing anything as exciting as boxers and Twizzlers.”
“I would love to. I’ll put on pants for you. I promise.”
“Sounds good.” You laughed. “Text me your address, okay?”
“Sure. Or you could walk with me now. Unless you’re tired of me and need a break before we hang out.” Peter suggested as you left campus together.
“It’s funny you say that. I was just telling my mom the other day that I never get tired of you.” You said casually.
“You..you don’t?” Peter’s face heated up as he followed you down the sidewalk.
“I don’t. I usually need a break from other people if we’ve been together awhile but it’s different with you. It doesn’t feel like I’m using my social battery if that makes sense.“
“It makes sense.” He smiled shyly as your hands bumped against each others. He was about to make a bold move and take your hand despite no one being around but you suddenly moved it to hit the crosswalk button.
Back at Peter’s apartment, he awkwardly gave you a tour and wished he had picked up his clothes before leaving the house that morning. You didn’t seem to mind the socks and boxers strewn across his room because you were too focused on all the little things he kept on his shelves. You picked up a picture frame of your freshman year high school class that had you and Peter seated right next to each other. Your friendship had only just begun so you often forgot how long you knew him for.
“So this is your room.” You smiled and put the picture back.
“Yup. This is where the magic happens.” Peter said and immediately cringed at himself.
“Oh really?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Yeah. This is where I practice magic. Wanna see?” He asked and picked up a deck of cards. You laughed and went over to take one.
“Is your card the ace of spades?” He asked.
“Queen of hearts.” You snorted and turned the card around.
“You’re the queen of my heart.” He whispered.
“Did you say something?” You asked as you looked at all his Legos.
“I asked what you wanted to do tonight.” He lied.
“I don’t know. We have the place to ourselves. We could do something rated R.” You said with a coy smile.
“Like what?” Peter gulped.
“Watch an R rated movie, you perv. Your aunt isn’t here to stop you.”
“You remember me telling you that I’m not allowed to watch R rated movies in the living room anymore?” Peter blushed at you remembering something he had randomly told you long ago.
“Are you referring to the time you watched Tusk at full volume while she had her friends from work over for the first time? How could I forget?”
“In my defense, I didn’t know what the movie was about. And I didn’t think her friends were gonna come into the living room and see that guy getting turned into a walrus.”
“Yeah, the title and cover art gave no indication that the movie would end that way. But that’s not a bad idea actually. Let’s watch something scary.”
“Okay.” Peter agreed and followed you out into the living room. He turned off the lights and got some snacks while you picked a movie. He hated scary movies but he was not about to tell you that. Instead, he sat on the couch beside you as a respectful distance and handed you a bag of chips. As the movie went on, you got closer and closer to each other. Peter had never really seen you scared before but you were practically in his lap just 40 minutes into the movie. You reached into the bag of chips at the same time as Peter and your fingers touched. You both froze and looked at each other as your faces heated up.
“Shit. I’m not wearing a condom.” Peter sighed, making you yank your hand out and laugh.
“You’re stupid.” You laughed and turned back to the movie just as a jump-scare happened. You screamed and jumped closer to Peter.
“This is so scary. Why did I pick this movie?” You asked as you drew your knees up and leaned into his side.
“Yeah, same.” He replied, not even listening. He couldn’t hear anything over the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. You were cuddled into his side with your head on his shoulder and knees in his lap with a blanket drawn up to your nose. He knew you were only cuddling him because you were scared but it didn’t even matter at that point. The movie went quiet for a minute and then made a loud sound, sending you to burry your face into Peter’s neck.
“Tell me when it’s safe to come out.” You whispered into his ear. Peter gulped and wrapped an arm around you to fully protect you from the movie.
“I will.” He said in a soft voice. You peaked your head out a few minutes later but stayed nestled into Peter’s side. You realized his arm was around you and smiled a little.
“Oh, this isn’t so bad.” You shrugged as the main character got eaten alive.
“I don’t understand you.” Peter chuckled and looked down at you. You laughed as well as you looked into his eyes. He was about to say something when another sharp sound from the movie caused you to jump.
“Hold my hand.” You blurted and grabbed his hand. Peter happily accepted and clasped your hand before holding it under his chin. You stayed in that position for a long time and watched the movie. You were both so focused on the screen that you didn’t hear May opening the front door and coming in.
“Hey. I’m home.” She said, making you both scream.
“Oh, hi May.” Peter greeted while he realized it was just her.
“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Parker. I’m-“
“I know.” She smirked. “I’ll just be in my room. But, Peter?”
“Yeah?”
“No going in your room with the door closed, okay? I’m home. And we have thin walls. Just keep that in mind.” She said, making Peter turn bright red.
“Got it, May.” He mumbled. She winked at you and disappeared into her bedroom.
“You told your aunt we were dating?” You whispered to Peter in confusion.
“No.” Peter answered honestly. “I guess she just assumed we were.”
“Wow. She’s just like the kids at school.” You shook your head. “I don’t get it. Why does everyone think we’re dating?”
“I mean…” Peter trailed off and looked down at your clasped hands. You hadn’t realized you were still cuddling and quickly jumped off of him. Peters heart sank and the longer he sat in the absence of your body heat, the more upset he felt.
“You just jumped off of me like I was sharp.” He said without looking at you.
“I didn’t want your aunt to see us cuddling and think-“
“And think what?” He snapped, cutting you off. You gutted your head back in surprise and let out a nervous laugh.
“Woah. What’s going on with you? She already knows about your secret life. We don’t have any reason to pretend we’re dating in front of her.”
Peter stared at you for a long time as the word “pretend” cut into him like a knife. Every time he thought you were going somewhere, he was reminded that it didn’t actually mean anything to you.
“Yeah. You’re right.” He mumbled and looked at the movie again. You kept your eyes on him and felt guilty. You had so much to say to him but you felt unable to speak.
“Peter-“
“I don’t think we should pretend to date anymore.” He blurted, cutting you off once again. Your eyebrows went up in surprise and you got a sick feeling in your tummy that you had just ruined something really important.
“What? Why not?”
“It’s stupid. No one even cares anymore.” He shrugged. “We don’t have to fake a breakup or anything but I don’t want to hold hands or play along anymore. I’m done.”
“What changed?” You asked in a soft voice. He was still looking at the movie while you were fully turned to face him.
“Nothing changed. That’s the problem.” He said and angrily got off the couch. You quickly caught his hand and he stopped. He looked down at the ground and let out a sigh. He knew it wasn’t fair to be mad at you if he hadn’t told you what was wrong. He slowly turned around and looked at you.
“Five years ago, you showed up to the same robbery at an all night CVS that I was at and I realized we knew each other from AP Spanish class because I had asked you earlier that day how to conjugate “poner” and you said “pusiste” and I laughed because I thought you were joking but you weren’t and then that night you heard me tell the burglar that he better“pusiste” the money back into the register.“ Peter began.
“Okay. Wow. That was a really long sentence.” You laughed softly. “But I remember that. I laughed and told you that you better remember that for the test.”
“You did. That’s how I knew it was you.” He smiled at the memory. “I failed that test, by the way. I still can’t conjugate “poner.” And I still think it means “boner” even though I know it’s a verb. But anyway, that night, I couldn’t sleep because I was so excited to have met you. Even though we technically already knew each other, that night put us in each others radars. I could not believe that I had met my match. You’re into science like me and sarcastic like me and you understand this side of my life because you have the same side. But despite running into each other on patrol almost nightly and seeing each other around school, I barely got you to notice me. I don’t think you even knew my name until we ended up going the same college. You called me “Timmy” all throughout high school.”
“You seriously look like one. It’s uncanny. I don’t know what it is.”
“I thought things would change when I found out we were going to the same college. The campus is so small I figured there’s no way we wouldn’t become friends. But even then, we hardly ever talked and when we did it was always about work. I didn’t even know where you lived until last semester.”
“I remember that too. The first night we really bonded was when you fell off that roof because you were trying to show me how to do a backflip.”
“Yeah, I’ve never been able to do a backflip.” He admitted. “I only said I could because you said you always wanted to learn how to do one and I assumed given my abilities I’d be able to do one if I just followed my body. But I busted my ass and you were kind enough to sneak me through your window and patch me up with some Scooby Doo bandaids.”
“It was all I had.” You shrugged.
“And you gave it to me anyway. Because you’re kind and compassionate and I’m just…I’m crazy about you.” Peter finally admitted. “I was so excited when we started hanging out more this semester but it always ended up crushing me when I remembered that we just doing it to keep people from finding out the truth. I really, really love our friendship and if I’m ruining it all by saying all this then at least I can die with it off my chest.”
“Wait, now I’m confused. Are you dying?”
“Maybe.” He shrugged. “It feels like I am every time you and I start to get close and then I remember this is all pretend for you.”
“So it’s not pretend for you?” You asked quietly. Peter stared into your heads for a minute and then shook his head.
“No. I was never pretending. I like you.” He told you. Your facial expression didn’t change as you stared back at him. Peter was really starting to panic until a smile tugged at your lips.
“Sit back down.” You told him.
“I’m sat.” He said and rushed it sit down. You nestled back into his side and laid your head down on his shoulder. Peter smiled and rested his head on top of yours, finally pleased with the way a conversation with you went. You both turned your attention back to the movie just in time for it to end.
“Hm.” You huffed. “That was supposed to be us symbolically finishing the movie as a real couple but it appears we’ve already arrived at the credits. Now what?”
“We could watch Tusk.” Peter suggested at the same time you said “We could make out.”
“I never actually saw Tusk but I always wanted to.” You gasped and hit his arm with excitement.
“Or we could do your thing.” Peter forced a laugh and tried not to sound as desperate as he felt.
“Let me see if I can find it.” You said as you scrolled through the streaming services on his TV.
“Or we could do your thing.”
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