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#his supervisor got sick and he said he had this plan for us to do the erikson thing and we’ve barely started it and i feel so bad bc i
pepprs · 1 year
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ok mutuals be honest. should i “break up” w my counselor over these texts yes or no
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#purrs#i don’t have the spoons to type much let alone reply to anybody ESPECIALLY not him bc this fucking pissed me off so bad i have been too#angry to reply. like what the fuck is this. im going through a hard time right now so why are you judging me for wanting us to talk about#that instead of me doing your stupid little homework assignment. i just feel so judged by him all the time and i can’t work up the courage#to tell him or end things. but i am actually dreading talking abt this new development / topic w him anyways bc the last time we talked abt#it he judged and pushed me so hard and i got SOOOOO angry but also maybe he was right and just saying thigns i didn’t want to hear and then#his supervisor got sick and he said he had this plan for us to do the erikson thing and we’ve barely started it and i feel so bad bc i#genuinely think it could work but i just don’t mesh well with him. but it’s like i should give it a try and stick it out bc there’s only a f#few months left and what if things get better. and also ihavent given him any indication of how unhappy ive been w him as my counselor and i#don’t want to spring it on him out of nowhere. but no we’ve been working together since October and i don’t feel seen or supported by him at#all an di know i have to leave bc i deserve better but things are so bad rn and my brain has been broken all weekend and i just don’t have t#the strength and idk what to reply or if i should but i think everyone is probably gonna say i need to leave him and i think you’d be right.#delete later#i truly do not have the mental capacity to rn but if u go thru my other purrs posts i talk abt some of the shit he’s done that has just been#building and building and i know i need to do smth about it bc it’s not okay. but im so scared.
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ilyasorokinn · 1 year
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(day ten) beans, chicken, corn, and leafs? , william nylander
note, this fic is part of my christmas series called taylor's very merry christmas series. check out this masterlist for the rest of the series. pair, william nylander x reader summary, when y/n hears about a homeless shelter serving food a couple of days before christmas, she immediately signs up. when will hears she signed up, he signs up. and gets practically the entire leafs roster (plus their partners) to sign up. warnings, none word count, 849 words
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(gif not mine)
Christmas was always one of your favorite holidays. You always loved spending time with family and giving them gifts, but something your family did often help out at the homeless shelter and giving out food.
You spent a couple of Christmases at a shelter handing out food or reading books or watching movies with the little kids, so when you moved to Toronto for school, finding a food bank was at the top of your list.
Every single year, without fault, you had shown up at the shelter, ready to hand out food and bring a couple of your favorite dishes. This year was no different. You had already picked out your recipes and were getting excited.
You and Will were discussing your holiday plans so you could figure out when to fly home, "You know I go to the shelter every year." You bumped your shoulder with his.
"Right." He nodded, glancing down at Pablo who was whining for food, "Do you need help with that this year?"
You smiled, "A little. I think some of the people who usually do it are flying home for Christmas, so we're a bit shorthanded."
"All right, put my name down, and save a couple slots. I know some other people."
"Really? That would be great. And I know there are a few kids who would love to meet William Nylander." You beamed happily, "This is so exciting! Okay, I'll go tell my supervisor." Will laughed as he watched you run off toward the bedroom.
-
A couple of days later, Will brought it up to some of the guys, "So, there's a shelter she goes to every year and gives out food, and they're a little short-staffed this year..."
"Sign us up." JT nodded before Will could even finish his sentence.
"You sure?" He asked, looking at his other teammates.
"We'll all do it, and if I have to, I'll make it mandatory." JT looked at everyone else, his "captain" stare daring them to speak up and say no.
Will let out a happy laugh, "All right, I'll tell Y/N. She'll be thrilled."
-
"Wait, you're serious?"
Will beamed proudly at your reaction, "Yep. Every single guy on the team and their significant other will be at the shelter."
"Oh, my goodness, William!" You tackled him into a hug, "This is so great. Ugh! My supervisor will be so happy."
"And a few of them said they were bringing some of their dishes, so you don't have to worry about making a million dishes."
"William Nylander, you are simply amazing." You were at a loss for words and didn't know how to respond.
"Only the best for you." He responded, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
-
You and Will got to the shelter a couple hours before everyone else was set to arrive to help set up and serve the early comers food who didn't like crowds.
As the players started arriving, so did the people. And when people heard that the Leafs were down at the shelter, they gave in droves. You had the people who came every week and a whole lot of newbies.
Most of the guys were entertaining the kids while their parents ate, so you found yourself standing behind the food tables with the partners serving the food.
"So, you do this every year?" Steph asked.
"Yeah, for the most part. There was one year when I got really sick and couldn't do it, but for the most part, every year."
"Whoa, I feel like I learn new things about you every time I'm with you." She laughed.
"But you all coming here this year, it means more than you know."
"Of course, even if JT hadn't made it mandatory, we would've all still come." Steph smiled, bumping her hips with yours softly.
The night was winding down but there were still people sitting at a couple tables, talking to each other and eating their food, and a few parents with their kids as they talked to the hockey players.
A lot of the guys and their partners had already left, due to having kids at home or because they had plans for Christmas the next day, so you didn't fault them when they said their 'goodnights', only flashing them a smile and a big 'thank you'.
Will took the chair you were once sitting in behind the table and kept you company as you served the people coming in. Once everyone was served, you sat down next to him, "Thank you for doing this. It means a lot."
"I had a lot of fun, a lot more than I expected to have, and I met a lot of great people." He admitted.
"A lot of the people here are great people and have so many good stories, but no one will ever hear them because they don't stop to ask." You smiled sadly.
"I'm glad you decided to stop and ask." He smiled, giving you a hug and a kiss on the top of your head.
-
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Wait, what...?
Bang Chan x female reader
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Synopsis: There was supposedly a once-in-a-lifetime contest you had applied for with no expectation of it being real or you actually winning.
A/N: This was a dream that I had a couple of nights ago. Totally self indulgent. Totally unrealistic. But isn't that part of the fun of writing "DrAbBLeS" as my dear friend @skz317cb97 would call this. (Luv u)
Warning: Nothing in this first chunk... No true smut, but a lot of suggestive comments and moments. Lots of touching. Self doubt in the form of the reader.
It was just another day. You'd woken up to feed the dogs, let them out, and then feed yourself. On a regular day such as this, it consisted of coffee, cereal, and a few funny Youtube videos to get you in a good mood for work.
Working second shift isn't awful, but having to be away from your friends when they make plans on a day like this made it pretty upsetting. Still, you got on your scrubs and were prepared to get to the hospital and pretend the weather wasn't phenomenal outside.
While your best friend was having her birthday party on the lake, you were deep cleaning under your cuticles to do some sterile compounding for the sick people under your care. While they're doing jello shots and jumping off the boat, you are chugging your energy drink and poking needles into vials of medications.
At least your work besties were around to make the day more bearable. Your work husband was cracking jokes, and your supervisor was asking you questions about your favorite Kpop group. Which was entertaining on its own!
"You said you'd been to one of their concerts right? Were you up close?" She asked and you wanted to shrug but you couldn't lie about your proximity with them compared to the whole arenas size.
"Out of the 20,000 people or so it wasn't that bad. I could see their smiles in person. I was just happy to-" You were cut off by the sound of her work phone ringing over your story.
She looked down and excused herself to answer it. "-Hold on. Y/n? I'm expecting something in a few, please listen for the doorbell to ring?" You nod of course, it was an easy request and kept you from having to wash-up and get back into your clean work space.
Your boss ran off on the phone and looked so excited. Weird? But whatever.
After a couple of minutes you heard the door ring from the front of your work area and went expectantly to answer and retrieve what your boss ordered.
You threw on your nice work smile but when you opened the door your eyes were met with your supervisor, your manager, some men in all black, and Bang Chan.
You didn't say anything, just stood at the door and stared at Chan. He looked at your supervisor and nodded. "Y/n?" You nodded while continuing your silence treatment, he giggled "You remember applying for the 'Stay with Stray' sweepstakes? Well, you won!"
"We received an interesting call and email from somewhere in South Korea and researched and conversed about this with them and made sure it happened. We know how hard you've been working and made all of the necessary plans and time-off requests for you already." Your manager added. You continued nodding and standing in place.
"I think she's in shock." The supervisor directed at the others standing outside the office.
"Hey, I know that they didn't tell you any of this, but I just wanted to let you know that all of the boys know and are so excited to have you stay with us for two months!" Chan continued to keep the mood light. You just met his gaze and he noticed tears forming. He reached out with his black hoodie and used it to wipe the stray tear. "No need to cry! If you'll join us, we will have a blast. You don't have to if you don't want to."
"NO!" You finally spoke to the crowd in front of you. You blushed and looked at the floor trying to regain your composure. "I mean, I would love to. I just, I have nothing with me-"
"You're friend Jenn grabbed you two suitcases full of clothes and your toiletries after you left to come here," your supervisor notified you.
"But its her birthday party today, that doesn't-"
"She made that up for this." She smiled in response.
"... I have my dogs-"
"She also said she arranged for your dad to watch them. They are already at his house." Your supervisor added before you could finish your thought.
"Am I really approved to be out of work that long?". The manager nodded confidently back.
"The company didn't want to leave any loose ends for you. We want to make you feel as secure in your decision as possible. And enjoy your time away without any concerns." Bang Chan smiled so hard you could see the dimples pop out and you immediately started to melt and feel more comfortable.
"Do it."
You looked back to see the your coworkers had gathered behind you. The few people that also listened to Kpop knew who was standing in front of you. The whisper had been from your loving work husband. He was using his hands to usher you out the door.
You returned eye contact with the best leader of your favorite group and asked, "If I squeal for a minute, will you judge me?"
He let out a hearty laugh and covered his mouth in embarrassment for the both of us. "Only if you hug me at the same time so I can hide my face."
"Deal." You hadn't made that many high pitch sounds of excitement since their last comeback. Chan pulled you into his hoodie and wrapped his arms over your shoulders. You, being the weirdo you are, did a small little tippy-tappy dance as your dream was coming true in front of you.
"When do I need to be ready to leave?" Chan pulled back to make eye contact, but still keep you embraced in the warmth of his over-sized hoodie.
His smile was both nervous and excited.
"Y/n, we're leaving now."
"Ohhhh... Fuck!"
(PART TWO)
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hyperfixated-gvf · 2 years
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Pine-ing Fir Two (Part 1)
The schedule shifted with my inspiration - we're on "Pine-ing for You" Part 2, also known as "Pine-ing Fir Two" Part 1 (confusing, I know), and the schedule will show that.
Anyways, this contains some indirect Sanny, but is mostly Sam x Reader!
...
Pairing: Sam Kiszka x Reader ; Sam Kiszka x Danny Wagner ; talk of Danny Wagner x Reader
Warnings: Language, smut, lots of hickies, polyamorous relationship, sharing Sammy, discussion of threesomes, dirty talk
Words: 8.1k words
Rating: Explicit
...
What a horrible, no-good, awful, shitty day it had been.
With Josh out sick, you’d been assigned copious amounts of work - which was way out of your paygrade - all of your breaks were interrupted by your supervisor asking questions about the project you were starting, you hadn’t been aware the take-home soup bowl you had leftover from dinner the last night wasn’t microwave friendly, so the bowl melted and you had to clean cheesy broccoli soup out of the bottom of the microwave, and then your ‘check-engine’ light started flashing at you when you got on the road.
So, yeah. No-good, horrible, awful, shitty day and all you wanted was some skin-to-skin contact with your boyfriend. 
The phone rang three times before Sam accepted the Facetime call, panting into the camera as his red, flushed cheeks appled in a grin. “Hey, Y/N!” he greeted happily, seemingly laying on his bed, from what you could see when most of the screen was taken up by his face. You suspected he just got back from a run, or the gym or something - Danny had been pushing him to join ever since Sam had breathed a word about wanting to go on a health kick at the New Year. “Whatcha doing?”
Seven months had passed by since you and Sam had first hooked up on Christmas, six since you’d both agreed on a vee polyamorous relationship - you knew Sam was still into Danny, and you had talked about maybe joining in at some point way back during your initial hookup with Sam, but you hadn’t found the right time to bring it up again. Danny lived in the town over - where Sam was - and while you were friends and all three regularly hung out with each other, it wasn’t like it was easy for you to look either of them in the eye and invite yourself into their bedroom activities. And Danny hadn’t made that leap, either - you weren’t the only option for change, after all.
“I just got off work,” you sighed. You chewed on your lip - you didn’t want to upset any plans Sam might have had, because it wasn’t a day he usually drove the half-hour to you to spend the night, but you were really needing him. “It was a bad day,” you admitted.
Sam’s brows furrowed in concern, and he sat up. “Oh no. What happened? It wasn’t my bonehead of a brother, was it?”
His jab at Josh made you chuckle, but you shook your head. “No. Although,” you altered, “he did unwittingly contribute to it by being sick, though, the fucker.” You went through the events of the day and Sam listened, although he seemed a little distracted at times (you didn’t blame him, his attention span was challenged even when he was trying to pay attention to something that he had sought out), and sighed again. “You wouldn’t happen to be free this evening, would you? Cause I could really use a good cuddle.”
The smile on Sam’s face was comforting, and his gaze strayed to something offscreen for a split second before returning to you. “Yeah. I can swing that - I can get ready and be there in 42.7 minutes flat,” he said with a wink. “Time it.”
Before you protest and offer to come to him instead of him making the drive alone, he hung up, and you were left in silence once again, starting your timer just for shits and giggles.
Except having a timer made waiting feel like a prison sentence. It was only five minutes in when you called Josh, just to have another ear to complain to that would actually know what you were talking about.
“I’m sorry, babe,” he apologized with a croaky voice and a violent cough, “but I really don’t think I’d contribute much to your morale even if I was there. I’m a baby when I’m sick.” There was beep in the background from his microwave. “Mama brought me homemade chicken noodle soup.”
You laughed and noted the grumble of your stomach as well - it was approaching dinner, and you hadn’t made anything, nor did you have anymore leftovers to heat up (stupid soup). “Did you beg her to stay and read you a bedtime story as well?” you teased. If you were sick and Mama Kiszka showed up at your door with some homemade soup, though, you wouldn’t turn her away either. Especially tonight.
“I did, actually,” he joked weakly, “she read The Very Hungry Caterpillar and it was delightful, thank you very much.”
The fridge fairy hadn’t visited you in the two minutes you’d been pillaging your own food, so you popped a packet of popcorn in, instead, praying that your microwave didn’t revolt and burn your food like the other had. “Well, you’re lucky that your little brother is coming over tonight, or I’d be calling your mom for some soup and a bedtime story, too.”
“Ewww,” Josh groaned. “I thought we had an agreement–”
“Oh, stop it,” you laughed. “I never said we were doing anything unsavory.” Josh let out a sigh of relief that you wouldn’t start going on about the intimate details of your relationship. “Although I suppose it’s not out of the question.”
Josh squawked in displeasure as you laughed, feeling a little bit better now, and definitely very thankful for the Kiszkas in your life. The popcorn decided to cooperate and came out perfectly popped, and you parked yourself on the couch with it, listening to Josh as he began a tale of he and his brothers when they were younger, spurred on by his desire to drive the subject away from your sex life.
Halfway through the story, though, you checked your phone and saw that Sam’s ETA would probably be in the next ten minutes - and knowing Josh, his story would lead into another, and you didn’t want him to make himself even sicker entertaining you. “Josh,” you interjected at the first chance, “should you really be talking this much when you’re sick?”
You could almost imagine the offended look on the man’s face as he tried to gasp, but only sent himself straight into another coughing fit. “You were the one who called me, Y/N,” he said once he regained the ability. “Am I going to be scolded for being a decent friend and picking up the phone when you call?”
“No,” you denied, gazing out the window and seeing Sam’s car pull into a guest spot, “but I am going to save you from yourself and hang up now.”
“Is my brother there? Let me talk to him - the bastard hasn’t called me about–”
The sound of a ‘call ended’ coincided with the knock at your door, and you threw your phone down to fly to the door, tugging Sam into your apartment and then into you before the lock was in place again. “Hey, Sam-a-lama-ding-dong.”
You felt his smile against your temple before he kissed you, and even with the small gesture from him, you felt the worries of the day start to melt away. “Hiya, sweetheart. Miss me?”
And you did miss him - the man had come to fit in your life like he’d always been there, and you loved the relationship you were fostering. You just hated that you weren’t right next door, or - fuck, right next to each other in bed - at any given moment. But the time would come, you supposed.
“Yes,” you said, pulling back to tug at his shirt, “now strip.”
“I thought we were cuddling!” Sam protested with a grin, still moving to push down his cotton shorts.
It was summer in Michigan, and while it didn’t get incredibly hot, Sam liked to take advantage of the weather when he wasn’t dressed up for work - and you reaped the benefits of it when he paraded around in little short shorts and tank tops.
You were certain Danny didn’t mind all that much, either.
“We are. Just, skin-to-skin, Sam. Come on, you need to know this by now,” you giggled, hurrying the process by shucking your own shirt off. Well, would have been hurrying the process if Sam didn’t stop to ogle you. “Sam, you can stare at me all you want - just get naked first. Or like, semi-naked. Boxers only.”
Sam winked. “Wouldn’t be able to control yourself if I was naked, huh?”
Despite your rolled eyes and snarked, “You wish,” his statement wasn’t that far off from the truth. It was a Pavlov’s Dog thing - you weren’t gonna look too much into it - if Sam was naked, and you were naked, it equaled sex. But all you wanted right now was a cuddle.
Strictly cuddling.
For now.
The rest of your clothes didn’t come off until you hit the bedroom, and when you finally finished stripping down and had gotten comfortable on the bed, Sam was right behind you, bare for you and yet covered…
In hickies.
The glint in Sam’s eyes told you everything you needed to know about his awareness of the marks - he knew they were there, and he wanted you to see them. And he knew that they were there because they looked fresh. New. 
You blinked several times, and Sam said - in the most innocent voice he could muster, “What?”
The dark bruises would have looked painful if you didn’t know intimately what they really felt like littering your own skin. “I dunno, you tell me.”
He crawled to you and wrapped you in his arms - and hickies or not, this was what you really wanted. With a sigh of content, the ball was in his court, so you let the matter on your side lie and just let yourself be held. 
You weren’t sure how much time passed when Sam broke the comfortable silence. “Was this what you needed?” he murmured, the room beginning to darken with the fading sun.
Just the closeness to another person - especially another person that you loved and had established both physical and emotional intimacy with - reminded you that not every day would be like this one, and that you had at least one person willing to take you in their arms and tell you that everything was going to be okay. That you didn’t have to shoulder your feelings alone.
You were extra grateful that Sam was doing this - you knew he didn’t like staying still, and that his mind was probably going a mile a minute, but then again…
“Yeah, exactly what I needed.” A small smile crept onto your lips. “Was it also what you needed?” you asked, a laugh tampered down.
“A cuddle?” Sam questioned, rubbing your back. “I’m always down for a cuddle.”
With a snort, you goaded him, “Only after sex.”
He laughed, finally looking down with a twinkle in his eye. “And what makes you think I’ve had sex today?” he teased, acting an innocence that he hadn’t had since the day he was born.
“Oh, shut it,” you giggled, pulling back and poking each hickey that sat on his skin like a target. “Unless you’ve contracted a case of ‘bullshititis’ that only manifested on your upperhalf, I think–”
“Nope, that’s it,” Sam sighed, flinging his hand onto his forehead. “The doc say it’s incurable.” 
He was fighting a grin, but failed to hold it back when you sputtered out, “I know Danny’s technically a doctor, but I don’t think he’s that kind of doctor.”
Sam scoffed. “What are you talking about? He’s a physical therapist - my bullshititis had to be treated physically,” he saw with an eyebrow wiggle, “and it was better than therapy.”
You turned onto your back, knowing that your cuddle session was done. But now that you felt better, and you were already both half naked in your bed - well, could anyone blame you for a wanting a little physical relief yourself?
“I’m no PT, but how do you feel about a little more treatment?” you suggested demurely, lightly thumbing his cheekbone.
Sam snickered, and you couldn’t help but laugh with him. “I’m sorry,” he giggled, “but Danny refuses to play doctor with me because he feels like it’s morally wrong, but you work it, so maybe we can convince him, sometime.”
The mention of you all together in the same sentence as a reference to kinky roleplay made your breath, your heart, your brain, your movements all stutter to a halt for a moment. You knew Sam had been hinting at it recently, and while the idea was more than appealing to you, something in you was always stricken by anxiety.
You cleared your throat and shoved both the lust and fear that came with the idea back, continuing on in your quest to ‘seduce’ Sam. As if he needed anything more than the mention to be ready to go.
“But I am curious. I’ve never seen you so…blemished before,” you mused, still drinking in the marks and trying to put Danny’s face with them. The man was so nice, you couldn’t see him ever touching someone hard enough to leave a mark in any way - but you supposed that it was a detail Danny kept to himself, that only certain people were privy to. In a way, you kind of felt privy to that detail. After all, you got to see Sam, and by proxy, Danny. Or, at least, what Danny does in bed.
Sam smiled cheekily. “Let’s just say that I provided an appropriate distraction for us both to get out of something that I know neither of us really wanted to do.”
“Chores?” you guessed, but Sam shook his head. “Hmmm…work stuff?”
“You’re getting warmer.”
Remembering how Sam had picked up the phone, two thoughts occurred to you at the same time.
“You weren’t just getting back from the gym when I called you, were you.”
Sam laughed loudly and slowly shook his head. “Nope.”
“But Danny wanted you to go with him?” you laughed, trying to hide your flushed face at having caught Sam on the turnside of having been fucked. Or fucking, you weren’t entirely sure of their dynamic - although if how he was with you was any indication, you wouldn’t be surprised if there was a little bit of both, with a small penchant for lying back and letting you do what you wanted. Or, letting Danny do what he wanted, in this particular context.
And there was that damn blush again.
Sam groaned and turned into your neck, though, so you doubt he saw the coloring of your face. “He was trying to make me lift weights, Y/N - I had to do something! And I want to be healthy just as much as the next person, but I would rather just go on a run or something. Gyms smell and are expensive and crowded and I’m always getting hit on,” he pouted, rolling on top of you and looking up at you with his chin on your sternum and your breasts pressing into his neck. 
“Oh, you poor baby,” you dramatized for him, raking your fingers through his hair as he let out a contented noise, “how awful. All those stinky, smelly gym-goers looking at you - I can’t imagine. You must feel like a piece of meat.” Your exaggerated simper was met with an unimpressed glare, and then a wet raspberry was blown into your skin.
You squealed and shoved at Sam’s head, but he fought to stay on top of you, giggling all the while. “Can we blame them? I mean, look at this perfection,” he boasted, and you laughed at his arrogance.
“I will say that I’m surprised you didn’t take the opportunity to see what a jealous Danny would do.”
Sam stopped short at that. The expression on his face was an amusing mixture of interest, arousal, and mischief. “Well, now isn’t that an idea.”
You traced a couple of the dark hickies that adorned his chest and shoulders. “It seems like he already loves to mark you up - I wonder where that comes from.” The silent nod and coy shrug was all you needed as confirmation that Sam was getting riled up and wanted to see where you’d take this particular line of thought. “Is Danny a little bit possessive of you, Sammy?”
Sam hummed and dipped his head to kiss the spot he’d just raspberry-ed. “Mmmm, nope,” he smiled, popping his ‘p’. “The only people allowed to touch me are you, and him. And I know for a fact that he isn’t possessive when it comes to you.” There was a level of suggestiveness in his tone that made you gulp and then guide Sam onto his back. His eyes sparkled with excitement and that trademark Kiszka playfulness that made everything fun.
“Is that so?” you asked lowly, thumbing over the unblemished skin in between the dark marks. “So he won’t mind if I…just…” Your sentence trailed off as your lips met the skin above Sam’s collarbone. “...sent you back with some marks of my own?”
The graze of your teeth and suction of his skin into your mouth made Sam exhale heavily. “Mind?” he breathed. “Nah. Not mind. But he - ah–” he cut himself off with a breathy moan as you moved up to the juncture of his neck and shoulder to map another one of your brands onto Sam’s skin. “--but I never said he wasn’t competitive,” he finished finally. “And he’ll definitely take this as a challenge.”
You chuckled and kissed him on the lips this time, and Sam tried to follow you when you pulled away. “Well, in that case, let me just…” You bit one more mark into him, right above his nipple, and smiled cutely at your work as Sam raised his brows at you.
“Are you sure you’re not the possessive one?”
With a wink and meandering finger down his chest, you palmed him over his boxers - fully hard and ready for you in any way you wanted him. “Sammy, baby - you wanna know what I’m possessive of?” you taunted, teasing the waistband of his tented underwear with your fingertips.
“Mmmhhhh. More than anything. What is it, Y/N?” he asked back, immersing himself into this game you were weaving around you both - even Danny, regardless of the fact that he wasn’t here. “What are you possessive of?” 
“I’m possessive of the thought of you laid out for him,” you confessed, kissing your way down Sam’s body between syllables, “in a way that only he and I know now. And I’m possessive of the thought of you getting fucked six ways to Sunday by your boyfriend and then immediately coming to fuck me six ways to Sunday.”
Sam followed you down with those bedroom eyes of his, and grinned salaciously. “I’m not sure I’ll get to fuck you at all if you keep this up, doll.”
Once his dick had been freed from the confines of his boxers, you grasped him in your hand and watched his lashes flutter. “Not sure you’ll be able to fuck me? Why? Was Daniel a greedy boy today?”
The red flush on Sam’s cheeks flared at your words, and then at the kitten licks to the tip of his cock, Sam was rather distracted - too much so to really respond with his usual cheekiness. “A little,” he admitted. “But in his defense, neither of us knew I was coming to see you tonight, either.” Sam licked his lips and groaned when you took him into your mouth fully. “If he did, I think he’d love to share with you.”
“Oh yeah?” you asked, curiosity lacing your words. “Has he…has he said so? Like - does he want to?”
Sam cocked his head and shot you a confused look. “I mean, yeah. I thought that was, like, a given from the start.”
“A given between us, but I don’t know how Danny feels about it,” you explained, still slowly stroking Sam’s cock to keep him interested. “I mean, of course you’re gonna want it - you’re getting some from both ends - you know we want you. But…Danny’s a friend of mine, too. I don’t want to make it weird.”
Sam grinned - like he had a secret that he was definitely about to share with you - and flipped you over, successfully taking his dick from you in the process as well so that he could line himself up with your entrance and pause.
Just waiting there as your mind tried to wrap itself around what had just happened.
“Yeah,” he said softly, “maybe it is because I love you both, and the thought of us all together makes me splooge–” you giggled at his terminology, “--but I know you want it, and I know that Danny wants it, too.”
You arched your eyebrow and your back - conveying both your desire for answers and for him to just fuck you already in the same move. “And how do you know that I want it?” you asked cheekily. But you lost the cheek on an exhale and Sam pushed into you suddenly, bringing himself as close to you as possible. 
“Because you’re a dirty girl, and I know it gets you wet to think about watching us together,” he whispered in your ear. With a few introductory thrusts, he kept the pace slow and steady, but reached down a hand to slip through the wetness at your center. “See? It’s getting you wet right now,” he grinned arrogantly, and you scoffed, fucking your hips up to throw him off balance.
“Fuck you.”
“Already on it,” he quipped, picking up the speed marginally. “But I feel like I haven’t - fuck, you’re tight - haven’t…ah, assuaged your fears, doll.”
In the months that you’d been together, your intimacy had been filed to an orgasmic precision that you both liked to offset with sloppy, messy sex every once in a while. You knew how to get each other off - you knew what got the other off - and you both never let the other get bored.
So when you slid Sam’s fingers - which had finally reappeared from where you were connected - into your mouth to suck clean, you relished in the feral grin Sam shot you. “Dirty girl,” he restated.
“Are you gonna tell me or are you gonna leave me hanging?” you panted, rolling your hips in time with his thrusts. “Verbal blue balls.”
Sam huffed out a laugh. “Gee, your pussy must be so good - I’ve forgotten what I was gonna say. Care to remind me?”
You bucked your hips once more, violent enough to throw Sam all the way out of you, and then rolled before he could line himself up again. “Fuck me like this and I’ll tell you anything you wanna know,” you goaded, hoping that the visual of your ass in the air was an enticing one.
There wasn’t a whole lot Sam could do that you wouldn’t think was sexy, and you could only assume that it was the same for him when it came to you.
A light slap on your cheek was your answer, and then the thick stretch of Sam filling you up from a different angle just drove it (and him) home. “Then ask me,” he demanded, gripping onto your hips for more purchase.
“How do you know?” you asked breathlessly. 
It wasn’t good enough for Sam. “How do I know what?”
“How do you know that Danny wants us all together, too?”
Just to coerce more out of you, Sam followed up with, “Danny’s with us all the time, Y/N. I need specifics.”
With his cock hitting all the right spots inside of you, you rolled your eyes, but complied easily despite the small spark of exasperation that zinged through you for a second. “Dirty boy,” you teased, though, unable to help yourself. “How do you know that Danny wants us all together - fucking and taking and giving and moaning and having a grand ol’ time?” you questioned lasciviously, knowing that was the angle Sam was hoping for. “How do you know that Danny’s okay with me watching him fuck you into the mattress? How do you know that he’d be into watching you like this? Hitting it from the back when it’s not him?”
Sam wrapped an arm around your midsection and guided you down until you were flat on the bed and Sam was pinning you there with his pelvis. His breath tickled your ear as he whispered, “I know because he always comes harder when I talk about us all. And I know because he’s always staring at us when we’re together. He wants to, babe, trust me.”
The thought of Danny - beautiful, kind Danny - coming to the thought of you, regardless of if it was with Sam and him as well, sparked a deep-seeded flame of arousal you’d been too busy to explore since the option had come to light. You and Sam’s relationship was relatively new - you hadn’t had a whole lot of time to consider Danny. 
But now that you were, you didn’t particularly want to stop.
“What’s he do, Sammy?” you gasped, rocking forward with his thrusts and fisting the pillow beneath your palms. “What’s Danny like?”
The arm Sam had wrapped around you forced its way down to your clit so that you could grind against his fingers, trapped between you and the mattress, and Sam moaned against your hair. “He’s so fucking beautiful, Y/N,” he said, clear adoration lacing his words. “The face he makes when you blow him is - fuck, it’s just pure pleasure. And he’s so damn good with his mouth, too.”
You groaned and bucked your hips harder, trying to ride the stimulation Sam was providing faster - more - to completion. “More. Tell me more,” you demanded. You wanted the details. You wanted to fucking blush the next time you saw the man.
“You might laugh at me,” Sam huffed, twitching inside of you, “but his stamina is out of this fucking world. Guy could go on for days.” He chuckled out a strained laugh. “I’m still getting there. And he had the day off today, so he was waiting for me when I got home early and - and–”
You finally understood what he was trying to say, and pushed your ass up into him. “Roll over - I’ll ride you.” Once you were settled in and straddling his hips, riding a comfortable rhythm, you put your hands on either side of his head and let your breasts sway in his face. “Come on, Sammy - if this is really what you want, tell me. Like he’s here.”
Sam whined underneath you and nodded. “God, Y/N, wait until you see his dick. It’s - I’ve never seen a prettier cock in my life, and - ah, shit, that’s good - it’s perfect, Y/N, you’re gonna love it.” The casual sincerity of the statement made you shudder atop of him, knowing that Sam was so confident in this potentiality. “I’m not lying - he stays so hard sometimes. I don’t know how. I don’t.”
“You’re doing so well for me, Sammy,” you praised, trying to target this newfound comparison between his stamina and Danny’s and also trying to convey just how hot his words were to you. “Come on, just a little bit more.” You continued to rock your hips on him, staying deep and aiming for all your sweet spots, knowing Sam would get there anyways with him already being close.
“One time,” he ground out, bucking his hips up into you and throwing his head to the side to wipe a bead of sweat off his temple, “he came first and he - and he just kept fucking me, Y/N - he’s a fucking beast.”
“What?” you asked, brain stuck on Sam’s exaltations. “I thought that was just porn bullshit - he didn’t actually fuck you though–”
“He did,” Sam insisted.
“No breaks?” you asked skeptically - well, as skeptically as you could when you were trying to ride your way to orgasm.
“Oh, god, baby,” he keened, warmth exploding deep inside of you. But with his next words, you weren’t sure if his exclamation was due his orgasm or his imagination. “You don’t believe me. But just wait. Just wait, and he’ll show you, I promise. And I know…”
He trailed off, and although it was difficult to focus on anything but your impending orgasm, you had the mind to be curious. You slowed your rocking to slip a hand down to your clit and get yourself off that way, so that you didn’t cause Sam any unintentional overstimulated pain. He’d already apparently had quite a day. “What? You know what?”
You thought it would be another dirty secret - another filthy series of words intended to get you off, but Sam made sure you were looking him in the eyes when he said, “I know you wanna watch Danny take me apart, but I also know you and him, and watching isn’t gonna cut it.” 
The images came full force to your mind - Danny looming over you - over Sam - and under, his dark eyes blown wide with lust, that expression that Sam described and along with it the phantom weight of a dick in your mouth. “Sam,” you whimpered, fingers flying against your clit while your boyfriend watched greedily.
“Say his name.”
The request came soft, but clear. Your eyelids had fluttered closed while imagining what it would be like with Danny, if you ever got that opportunity, but at Sam’s words, they flew open once again. Sam’s chest heaved with arousal; he was too spent to participate again, but it was obvious that he was finding just as much pleasure in this as you were.
“Whose?” you asked, wanting to hear him say it again, too.
Sam licked his lips and met your eyes, letting his mouth stay parted as he gave you the heaviest bedroom eyes you’d ever seen on him. “Danny’s. Say Danny’s name for me, Y/N. Let me hear how much you want him, too. Say his name when you come.”
With dual faces flashing behind your eyelids, you let go - Sam still nestled inside you and feeling the contractions as you came and moaning all the while - as you let out jagged gasps and let your hips jerk you through. “Danny!” you cried, much to Sam’s enjoyment if the way he groaned and pinched his eyes shut was any indicator. “Danny, fuck - fuck fuck - oh, shit,” you panted, each curse decreasing in volume as you came down from your high. “Sammy.”
Sam’s name was the final one on your lips as you leaned down to kiss him and continue your interrupted snuggle. “God, Y/N, that was hot,” Sam chuckled.
“Yeah,” you agreed, trying to wrap your head around just how hot it really had been. Because it was. And that scared you a little bit, because regardless of what Sam said - were you really allowed to want that? It had been a joke at the beginning to get the ball rolling with you and Sam, but now, you were in a relationship. Sam was in a relationship with both of you - of course he’d get the strings twisted sometimes, and you just didn’t want Danny’s feelings to get rolled over in how hot it all was.
“You’re still worried about it, aren’t you?”
Sam’s voice brought you out of your musings, and you turned to find a softness in his eyes that you knew he reserved for you and Danny. 
You shrugged, pecking him on the lips. “I can’t help the worrying. I don’t want to end up ruining what you and I have, what you and he have, or even what friendship he and I have.”
The phone in Sam’s hand didn’t even register in your brain until it started burbling in the tone of a FaceTime call. “Babe, he doesn’t want to be friends with you,” he said suggestively, winking at you as the phone rang. “You can ask him for yourself.”
“Samuel!” you gasped, making sure you were covered by the blankets as the ringing stopped and Danny’s face appeared on the screen. 
Sam didn’t bother covering himself off - in fact, he seemed to be preening and purposefully showcasing his new markings. “Hey, Sam. Is Y/N in the shower?” you heard Danny say distractedly.
They must spend more time shirtless together than you imagined…er, well, guessed. Not imagined (definitely imagined), because if Sam showed up covered in hickies on your screen, you’d melt into a puddle.
“Nope. She’s right here, actually. Wanna say hi?”
“...right there?” Danny asked hesitantly, and you could only imagine what picture Sam painted - naked, marked up, and in your bed.
It was an entirely accurate picture, whatever it was, but still. This was just so…abrupt. You thought the incorporation of Danny into the equation would be handled with more care and subtlety - but when Sam was involved, and moreover, when Sam wanted something - subtlety was not a strong suit of his.
“Naked and asking about you,” Sam said with a wink, and you groaned, dragging your hands down your face and readjusting the cover over your breasts as Sam turned the camera toward you. 
“He’s a liar, Danny. Kinda,” you groaned at the screen, peeking out of your fingers to see Danny with his eyes bashfully cast down respectfully. At your tacked on little spark of potential, he chanced a glance up at you, and his eyes stayed once they were there.
You’d never tell if the way he lingered on certain parts of the screen made you shiver a little.
“A liar?” he ventured, cocking his head. You noted that his curls looked very defined, and thought to ask Sam if he had anything to do with it, being so into hair care himself. “How has our Sammy been a liar, then?”
Our. Just the plural had your heart kicking up a notch and your brain comprehending that this was really the first time the ‘our’-ness of your situation had been acknowledged when you were all interacting. 
It threw you for a bit of a loop, if you were being honest. “Uh…” you scrambled for a coherent answer, and tried to remember your train of thought. “He was - I mean, we were both kinda - Sam, I’m gonna kill you,” you ended up saying, abandoning the attempt to cover your own ass when confronted with the real thing that had just made you come only a few minutes before.
Sam laughed boisterously and turned the phone away from you so that your lobster-red face would be shielded from Danny’s amusement. “Sammy,” Danny chided, “don’t torture her.”
He winked into the camera and then grinned at you. “She likes being tortured.”
“Shut up,” you warned threateningly.
Sam just stuck his tongue out and arched his neck for the camera. “You like my new digs, Daniel?” he asked coyly, and Danny hummed through the screen.
“We’ll talk about that later, Sam,” Danny said, the hint of a smile in his voice - Sam’s peacock primping was endearing to those who loved him, and infuriating to those who didn’t. “Could you give the phone back to Y/N for a minute, actually?”
Sam stopped his flaunting and cocked his head. “Oh. Uh, yeah, sure.”
It wasn’t often that Sam dropped his playfulness, but Danny’s sudden request must have stunned him, because he had an unreadable light in his eye as he handed you the phone. The ghost of a smile still graced his lips as he did so, just muted and mixed with an expression of guarded curiosity.
You knew he wasn’t against the idea of you together, that was the point of this call, but this lack of emotional communication had you strung out. It must have shown on your face, because Danny blinked and let out a loud chuckle once he was in your line of sight and you, his. “God, Y/N - why do you look like I’ve been…fucking beating you or something?”
Danny’s light-hearted humor made you smile through the worry, and you shrugged. “I’m in a very new situation, here, Daniel - you’ll have to forgive me if I wear my heart on my sleeve when I’m nervous,” you joked, eyes flicking to Sam every so often just as a physical assurance that you weren’t dealing with this alone. “So what’s up?”
“I know we’ve been…skirting around this for a while.”
This being a sexual relationship that wasn’t separated by walls and ‘Sam and you’ and ‘Sam and Danny.’
“Yeah,” you huffed, taking the opportunity to appreciate the man on the screen, and just how sweet he was.
Danny seemed just fine taking on the responsibility of addressing the questions that needed to be asked, since you were too cowardly to and Sam would draw it out for his own pleasure and amusement. “What I want to know is if you’re comfortable, like…watching? Or being watched.”
“Both, ideally,” Sam chimed in, now more invested and engaged in the conversation even though Danny had asked for you specifically. You didn’t doubt that he and Sam had talked about it together, already, to some extent.
“Shh,” Danny shushed him, “I’m asking Y/N, nosy.”
You smiled at Sam’s face when he was scolded through the screen. “Yeah, Sam. The adults are talking.”
Sam sputtered indignantly, and pushed his face into the camera frame. “Hey! Am I not important anymore? Do I mean nothing to you both?”
With a great roll of both of your eyes, you pushed at him, and Danny brought the attention back to you. “Alright, Sam. You know that we both love you, and we both adore you, and you have hickeys and love notes from us both to prove it. Now butt out, I really would like to talk to Y/N.”
But of course, Sam just couldn’t not have the last word. “And we would all like it if we just met up and fucked finally–”
“Sam, I’m serious, shut up.” Danny’s tone was still lovingly exasperated, but it was much more serious than before, and Sam stuck his tongue out, but settled back in to let you talk. “Now, Y/N. I just want to get this all out there. It’ll be better once we talk.”
You nodded. “I know. I just - I can barely tell Sam what I want,” you admitted bashfully.
“Well, Sam’s a basket case and loves watching people squirm,” Danny said with a smirk, and Sam huffed haughtily.
“I didn’t hear you complaining about that particular proclivity of mine earlier today.”
Danny grinned. “Never said it was a bad thing.” And then back to you - it was a very discombobulated series of exchanges, and yet, so natural. It was uncomfortable, but not nearly as humiliating as you’d imagined this going. “So…watching. You - I mean, it’s not like a - a tolerance thing, is it?” Danny asked you, his gentle tone lulling you into the safety of where you were - one lover by your side, and a friend on the other side of the screen. “Like, you like it - me and Sam? You don’t just–”
“Yes, Danny,” you interrupted, putting the poor guy out of his misery. You knew you wouldn’t have been able to articulate it any better, and it was like you had thought before - you understood. “Yeah, I like the idea - quite a lot, actually,” you tittered shyly. “Maybe even more than I should. And…what about you?”
His swallow was audible across the phone, and you bit back a smile. “Me?”
“Yeah, how do you feel about watching, and being watched?” you asked, carefully keeping track of his expressions. 
His cheeks reddened, and he nodded. “I think I’d like - yeah, I mean, to be in the same room for that. Or…you in our room. To share him,” Danny said lowly, his obvious arousal not visible but almost tangible even in different towns, “with you - directly. Together.”
Fuck. If this was how it was gonna be between the three of you when you all weren’t even together, you were a little afraid that physically being in the same place with this extended boundary would shake more than just your world.
The tension was cut by Sam, once again, laying wet kisses onto your neck in view of the camera and saying, “Don’t keep him in the dark, Y/N. Tell him what we talked about earlier. When you were on top of me, remember?” He pretended to think while you flushed. “Or was it when you were on your hands and knees for me?” He shrugged. “Either way, don’t you remember what you demanded I tell you?”
“Sam!” you gasped, both at his nip and his words, your embarrassment flaring up again when Danny looked away and broke the spell you’d been under. He grinned against your skin and lazily turned toward the camera. 
“No? You don’t wanna tell him?” You didn’t get the chance to answer him before he let a wolfish grin overtake his features and kissed you deeply - a little bit of a show for Danny, you knew. What surprised you was how much more of a show you wanted to put on for him. Sam’s words were teasing and playful - he was toeing the line, speaking just loud enough for Danny to hear. “It’s okay - I can do it for you,” he crooned, “because I just know he’d love to hear whose name–”
Before you could slap your hand over his mouth, Danny’s voice was cutting into your space again. “Sam, that’s enough.” The sweet, gentle, caring Danny that had just been stumbling over his words and desires was still there, but there was an edge to his tone. A sharpness that didn’t allow for argument. “Stop teasing her. That’s not what we’re doing, here.” Your attention was drawn to and kept by the way Sam immediately backed off at Danny’s words. Interesting, indeed. “I don’t want to know anything she doesn’t want me to.”
Seeing Sam frozen and still for a second before his brain seemed to reboot made something deep inside you squirm deliciously and rear up. If it had been anyone other than Danny, the results would have been near catastrophic with Sam’s pride. But here he was, continuing on as if nothing had happened, except toned down a little. 
“So are we good? All settled?” he asked you both, eagerness splashed onto every surface of his body - grabby hands, restless feet, shifting facial expression, and that hand constantly pushing his hair back.
“I mean…” you said coyly, winking at Danny through the camera, “there’s other things to discuss, but that’ll have to wait until the time comes.” 
Sam groaned, his impatience getting the best of him. “But I’ve been waiting for so long. Danny - can’t you just hop into your car and make the drive?” 
If Sam thought his whiny plea would change anything for the night, he was sorely mistaken. Danny just laughed and got up from wherever he’d been sitting, a flash of patterned boxers gracing the screen before it was back on his face. “Sam, after the day you’ve had, you couldn’t handle us both.”
While Sam might not have had the stamina that he was lauding Danny for having, the man had resiliency. Not even your college flings could get it up as often as Sam could - in fact, it was probably good that your relationship with him was polygomous, because he’d probably fuck you raw without someone else taking a bit of his libido into their hands. His hands. 
Dammit, you were thinking about Danny’s hands, now.
“You’d like to see me try, though, right?” he asked coquettishly, fluttering his lashes at you both. Danny stopped moving to wherever he was going and managed to tear his gaze away from Sam’s devilish attempts at seduction and to you, the heaviness keeping you pinned.
His gaze was loaded, electric, and brimming with silent, erotic promise. It took your breath away, and you had to force yourself to bring in a deep inhale when he said, “You know I would. But when the moment comes, we all owe it to ourselves to be rested and ready - not some patch-job meetup at,” he swiped at his screen to look at the time, “10:56 pm when you’ve already gone four rounds today. Assumedly.”
Your eyes widened and you swung your face to Sam. Four rounds? “Damn, boy.”
Sam shrugged and yawned, belying his actual energy level when he wasn’t hopped up on the thought of all you three together, and pointed to the screen and then to himself. “Long time, lots of times.”
The effects of the long day, the emotional turmoil working through this initial stage, and your previous orgasm having sapped you, a shower and sleep sounded like a good plan, for now. “I’m gonna say goodnight, too, Sam, so why don’t you head to bed, too, cause this isn’t happening tonight,” Danny said, dashing a teensy little sliver of hope you’d shared with Sam as he was lit up by his bathroom lights. “I’ll see you guys soon, okay? Have a good night.”
Danny reached towards the propped up phone, assumedly to hit the end call button, but Sam crowded the camera towards his face and placed a kiss on it. “I kinda like you,” he said quietly and with a warm smile. “A lot.”
Even when it wasn’t directed towards you, it made your heart clench with love. Just seeing Sam happy and in love with Danny as well - you didn’t feel the need to examine why no feelings of jealousy or insecurity arose - it was just…right.
And Danny felt the same way, according to the soft, pleased face he gave back. “I love you, too. Now go to sleep, you have work in the morning.”
You laughed and Sam groaned, “Don’t remind me. I have to get up even earlier.”
“My fault,” you admitted. Not seriously, though, because you knew Sam was more than happy to be there with you.
Just as you expected, Sam wrapped you up in his long arms and kissed your cheek. “Maybe,” he teased, and you shook your head affectionately, “but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Well, actually, I would rather have it one other way,” he amended, wiggling his eyebrows in the direction of the phone, where Danny had been watching you both fondly. 
At Sam’s last ditch effort to get him to you guys, he rolled his eyes and picked up the phone with finality. “Soon, Sammy. Bye for now, though.”
He didn’t allow any more space for added comments before he hung up the phone, knowing Sam would keep him there as long as possible - you’d been on the receiving end of that treatment yourself, and saying goodbye to Sam was like trying to pry the tentacles of an octopus off: he just kept latching on from another direction. 
Once Danny’s presence had faded from the room, you turned to face Sam again, rethinking the shower but knowing once you got in you wouldn’t want to get out. “Well, that went well. Although I wasn’t a fan of the sneak attack,” you said with an accusing brow.
Sam was not on the same wavelength - he threw the blankets off, much to your complaint, and took your hand to lead you to the bathroom. You followed reluctantly, but only a little bit. “A sneak attack was the only way I was gonna speed this up. If it were up to you two worrywarts, it would be another 10 years before I got you both in the same bed together.”
He started the shower while, for about the thousandth time just that night, you sighed in fond exasperation. “I see where your priorities lie,” you teased. “Sacrificing our comfort for your own perverse pleasure.”
You didn’t mean a word you said - Sam was blunt, but he was intelligent and he loved you and Danny both, and you knew that he only acted in everyone’s best interest. Still, as you stepped under the warm spray, Sam tilted your face up to his and planted a gentle kiss to your lips. “No. Well, kinda,” he corrected to both of your amusement, “but no.” He ran a wet finger down the bridge of your nose and made sure you were both under the showerhead. “My priority is making you two as happy as I can, and I really think that you and Danny can make each other happy, too.”
You smiled at his sincerity, and hugged his wet torso to you. “I know you do. And I hope we can, too.” In all honesty, you believed Sam wholeheartedly.
It was all just a matter of time, now.
...
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Welcome to the 12 Days of Christmas countdown to Christmas Day. We've 9 days left!!
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Country Girl
Summary: Gabriella to the city and meets a lot of difficulties, but she also meets one of the best people she could've hoped for, Black.
Tags: Black, Chiron, Moonlight, Drug mention, Abuse mention
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Black lived and worked out of his luxury apartment in DC. He was two years out of jail and with his connections, his life picked up where it left off. On the clock, he did tech, but his side gig was drugs. Life was easy, but only because he made it that way. When the empty apartment beside him became occupied, he was a little upset. He hoped they'd stay to themself and not come knocking on his door.
Gabriella, on the other hand, was a transplant who didn't know a soul in DC. She'd taken a lump sum of money from her well-off husband Marcus and fled in the middle of the night in her car, driving from South Carolina to DC with anything she could grab, a swollen lip, and a black eye. She was done.
It was lucky that she found the luxury apartments and that the landlord was willing to look the other way about her not having a job so long as she paid him. She could continue to pay him for a few months, then she'd be out on her ass. She needed a job quick, but she was a simple country girl in foreign territory with no degrees. She'd rested in the safety of her marriage, but unfortunately it wasn't safe at all. This was Plan B.
October
Introspective and quiet, Gabriella climbed the flights of stairs to her empty luxury apartment. She'd just nabbed a job as a secretary despite being torn down in the interview. She didn't know how to feel.
"Good afternoon," she tried once more in her southern drawl to her handsome neighbor as he headed out, all wrapped up for the autumn wind. She could hardly see his movie star handsome face as he turned away, which was a shame. He ignored her as usual. In her hometown, it was only natural to smile and talk to strangers, but in DC, people clutched their bags tighter.
Sighing, she sat her bag on the kitchen bar in her apartment. There was no furniture, but she couldn't care less about that. One, it was a beautiful place. Two, Marcus was nowhere near. Three, she had the keys, and as long as she could afford them, she had access to the beautiful balcony view overlooking the city streets.
"Oh my good lord," she whispered, watching traffic over the banister, still not used to it. She showered and made herself a meal, wishing she had a friend or someone special in her life to make the empty apartment a little less cold.
Gabriella woke up early for her day job as a secretary every morning, though it didn't pay much considering the extravagant cost of rent and her bills. She took pride in herself and her work. It was something until she could do better. She didn't have any family or friends to call on. They were all on the side of Marcus. To them, he was still a good man.. So Gabriella was on her own.
"You're late again," Mr. Macklebee complained when she walked in 2 minutes after 8:45 AM with his coffee in hand. She only got paid for 9-5, but he required her to come early. "If you didn't spend so much time on your makeup every morning, you'd be on time."
As much as Gabriella liked to believe the comments didn't get to her, they did. The makeup was a habit from covering her bruises so often. Maybe she didn't need to spend so much time on it anymore.
Gabriella never snapped or talked back, she mostly remained silent, thinking about things.. but her supervisor could be viciously sexist and mean. There was constant remarks about her appearance and competence.
"You look sick," he commented flippantly one morning when she handed him his coffee. She'd gone without the makeup to save time, and that was when he spit the coffee out, some of it getting on her blouse.
"My five year old does a better job listening than you do. I said 3 pumps. I don't taste 3 pumps... This is what I get for hiring a ditz. Oh, and that email? I shouldn't have to tell you there's a fucking typo in the header. Are you trying to humiliate me?"
Being the sensitive young girl she was, there were some days Gabriella would go home and cry. Nothing she did was right. It all built up since there was no one to set her mind at ease. She spent a lot of days in her apartment, trying to write as a way to vent her loneliness and her frustration, but she came up dry every time.
She could only think over the events of the day and sit on the found furniture that she'd had lugged into her apartment over the weeks she'd been there. There was an old couch which she slept on, a table, and four chairs. It was sparse, and adjusting to the city on her own was a lonely process, but she was still very happy because for the first time in a long time.. she felt safe.
November
Gabriella heard giggling out in the hall and then through a portion of the wall that she shared with the neighbors to the left. Britney and Jason. They were a friendly young white couple in love. Always laughing, always having a good time.
Gabriella listened with her ear against the weak point of the wall as she usually did, pretending she was a Britney with her own Jason. It was almost as good as Tubi.
Every now and then, Gabriella would see her any one of the neighbors in the hall either coming or going. Some were nice, but mostly everyone minded their own business and preferred for her to do the same.
The handsome neighbor to the right was quiet as a mouse. He wasn't at all friendly in the scale of city folk. He didn't talk or make eye contact, yet Gabriella found herself fantasizing about him at home and at work. In her mind, he was her Jason, but he was also like Batman, shrouded in secrecy. She wondered where he went at night when she'd watch him through her peephole.. and the type of person he was.
"Gabriella, get in here. What did you do to my schedule?"
"I organized it.. Is that wrong?"
"You don't do anything that I don't tell you to do. Did I tell you to change the format?"
"Well, no Mr. Macklebee sir.."
"Then why.. Gabriella. Why?"
Nothing she did was right. There was no pleasing this man. Still, she wouldn't quit until someone else hired her.
She left work to get groceries for the week, sticking to a strict budget. All her money went to the rent and her car, she couldn't splurge like she would've back home. Marcus was an excellent provider, but his love came with bruises and hospital visits.
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"Hey pretty," a man stepped up beside her cart. He was tall and black and fairly good-looking. He looked sturdy and somehow responsible. Could've been the work boots. "You.. You don't want the big milk? Get the big milk," he gestured to the fridge. "And you've got.. what is this," he stared into her basket. It was the most involved anyone had been with her since she moved to DC. "Oh no, sweetheart. You don't want this.. Come on, come on. Get the name brand. What is Fruity O's? Really? Come on.. Get the Fruit Loops." He exchanged the milk in her cart for a big carton and started filling her cart with random food.
"I can't afford all this right now," she admitted sorely, watching him in confusion.
"Nah nah, let's rid of all this here.. I can't let a pretty female like you leave with what you had in this cart. I'll pay this time around and you can pay me back another way, on your time."
They got to talking and he seemed so nice talking about a furniture company he owned. His name was Johnathan.
"It's not a big company... yet.. it will be."
"Do you have room for any more employees?"
"Who did you have in mind? I hope they have a strong back."
"I'm very strong."
"Noooo.. I thought you meant a brother or boyfriend."
"Oh no, I don't have either.. it's for me, I can do the work," Gabriella promised. "I'm not from here. People haven't been all that nice."
She just needed the money and to escape her current job. He was hesitant, but he threw her a bone.
"In good conscience, I can't let you move furniture in the warehouse but I can have you handle the shipping and managing."
So things were looking up. She quit her job with Mr. Macklebee. She showed up to figure out how a day would look like at work for Johnathan. She had a decent salary, and he'd paid for her groceries.
She was so appreciative that she offered to make him dinner.
"I don't have a lot of furniture," she warned as she led the way up the stairwell. "I don't get a lot of company. You're the first person I've had over."
He came with flowers that she put aside because she had no vase. The food was nearly done. He put his arms around her waist and though he was a nice guy and smelt way better than he did on most days, she wasn't ready to dive into another situation so soon after her Marcus.
"Look Johnathan... I appreciate you helping me through such a rough time in my life, me being new and not knowing much.. but I think we've gotten something mixed up. See, I'm not looking for anything romantic.."
"That's fine." He started kissing on her neck. "Ain't gotta be nothing outside of what we make it." He was trying to get under her blouse. She pushed his hands away, and he put them back, still attempting.
Gabriella got flashbacks of Marcus. He would do similar only they were married so it was deemed as his right.. according to her small town. She continued to push his hands away, trying to move from around the stove, but Johnathan was strong.
"Stop resisting me, this is why you invited me, right? To thank me?"
"Johnathan? I don't want anything sexual either."
She pushed him off of her and that's when the scrapping began. He called her ungrateful and though she was no match in physical strength, fought back as best as she could, screaming while he hit her as if she were a man. She was over the counter facing the wall and struggling against him when he released her suddenly. There was a scuffle behind her. Her next door neighbor was full-on fighting Johnathan and she winced as he slung the hot frying pan of butter chicken clocking Johnathan square in the back of the head.
Gabriella watched her neighbor that had never so much as made eye contact.. trap Johnathan in a firm headlock with no effort.
"I'll kill you if I see your face again. Ain't no reason I should know your name."
They were both big men, but Johnathan was easily subdued to his own embarrassment. He knew he had an awful headache as well.
He pushed Johnathan out the door and Johnathan left abruptly after dusting himself off.
"Tired of hearing y'all, I'm tryna sleep," the neighbor muttered on his way out as Gabriella watched with admiration for her personal Batman. She was still in shock from the close call, but she managed a loud thank you as he slammed the door of his own apartment.
Johnathan called the next day to apologize for his behavior. He still wanted her to work for him, but Gabriella didn't trust it. She told him no and to lose her number. Then when she left her apartment again, her neighbor was there.. passing by.
"Don't let him back in here," he warned, turning away to take the stairs.
From that point when Gabriella happened to spot her male neighbor in the halls, he'd give her a subtle nod of acknowledgement. DC was cold and distant, but now it was a little warmer.
Gabriella placed applications, made calls, and waited for someone to accept. It took a week, but she got a call back from a different office who would take her as a secretary. This place seemed way less angry.
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Black's hopes for silence had been granted. His new neighbor was quiet outside of the random greetings in the hall. He ignored her, but he wasn't rude. He was the silent type, watching and assessing until he could decide if a person was worth speaking to. Not just anyone could infiltrate his world.
The noise through the wall was unusual and triggered bad memories. Last he checked, she lived alone. He knocked on the weak spot in his wall, talking through it to see if his neighbor was okay, but as he listened, he could hear what was happening. Her door was unlocked. He acted and didn't think, only coming back to himself after he swung that frying pan. He didn't need to go back to jail.
A couple of weeks later, he opened his door to find a cheesecake on the ground with a note. "Hope you aren't allergic."
He wasn't a fan of sweets, but he took it, looking thoughtfully at her door. She seemed like a good enough person. She just had really bad judgment.. something he couldn't hold against her. He decided to write her a small note and leave it at her door. "Thanks for the cake. -Black"
December
The job was going well, and though it wasn't much money, she wasn't being berated. She was being respected for once and she no longer went home to cry.
Since she was in a better mood, she decided to make her fine neighbor a cheesecake and set it in front of his door as a real thank you for showing her that the spirit of kindness did in fact exist in the city. She hoped he wasn't lactose intolerant and that he did like cheesecake. She continued to daydream about him, and suddenly, she had a name to pair with the face.
"Black," she sighed as she typed for her new boss. Here, things were opposite. She did everything right and was hailed a super hard worker.
Now when she passed by Black, he would bless her with that pretty smile and even tell her "Good afternoon." She was completely taken by him, leaving him food every so often just so she could get another handwritten note.
Then the morning came when Gabriella heard unusual bumping from his side of the wall. It started to make her nervous. No one was yelling or arguing, but it felt to her like a serious scuffle. She gathered every ounce of bravery and her frying pan to head over, letting herself in to see Black gagged and his arms tied. He was still holding his own rushing and kicking his assailant. He refused to go down without a fight so Gabriella didn't think.
She gathered the details of the scene within a split second and double-teamed the assailant with her frying pan upside his head. Black grunted desperately, and Gabriella followed his eyes to a gun that was on the floor. The men had been scrambling to get to it. That was what she heard. Gabriella rushed to pick it up to beat the masked man, and when he tried to fight her for it, it went off. She got scared and touched the trigger, shooting him in a vital organ. He collapsed within her arms reach as she watched, her adrenaline high. Black's grunting pulled her out of her trance. She dropped the gun and ran to him to free his mouth of the gag and his arms of the binding. They were intentional knots that took time and skill. She was visually confused.
He held his hand over her mouth and pushed her out of the apartment.
Gabriella asked no further questions. She locked herself into her apartment, and surely enough, within hours, police were there looking for Black and knocking on doors. Gabriella was able to say she didn't know anything. She didn't see anything. She didn't hear anything. Unfortunately, she didn't see Black again. He never came back.
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Black got arrested about five miles away from his apartment. The entire thing was a setup that he didn't realize until it was too late. He thought he was having a one night stand with a guy he met when he was dealing in the club. They'd had a good night, and he'd felt okay enough to let the man tie his arms, just not his legs AND arms at the same time.
He didn't expect the cops to go that far just to catch him again, but they did, and he was sitting in jail again, but this time for possession, distribution, and murder.
He wasn't sure he cared to be what was considered a decent and hard-working man anymore. All jail did was harden him and teach him how to get better at crime and manipulation. What else was he supposed to do? He didn't have a degree or the patience for one or an interest in school. Selling drugs was fast money.
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It was during the Christmas season when Gabriella saw the news. The story seemed familiar, and she read it through following it to the end. She was able to look him up in the system and see that Black was indeed in custody. She also the charges. Drugs.. it didn't surprise her. In fact, it made perfect sense. Murder..
He was serving for a crime he hadn't committed. But did she have the guts to tell the police that it was her.. if it would lighten his sentence? She couldn't say that she did. She wouldn't last in jail.
But what about him? Did he deserve to serve extra time just because he was serving some? It wasn't fair to him.
She gathered her bravery once more and visited the jail to start the process of seeing him. When she was finally taken in for visitation, the look on his face was surprise. He didn't expect anyone to visit him, least of all her. She wasn't used to seeing him showing any sort of emotion, but here he was.
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Did he secretly hope she'd come clean? She wanted to ask him because from the bottom of her heart, she knew he was one of the only pure and kind men on the face of the earth.
"No," he whispered as if reading her mind. He shook his head. He was silent for a while before cracking a joke. "Guess we both have bad taste in men.."
Gabriella chuckled and nodded in silent communication. She was thanking him yet again. She shook his head.
"Merry Christmas... go.. get outta here," he smiled kindly with not an ounce of malice in his heart. He meant it.
It was a short visit. He left almost immediately after he composed himself going back to his seemingly emotionless state. Gabriella knew the truth behind that solemn look at it tore her up inside. He had to act tough.
When she returned home, she sat, and words began to flow from her mind nonstop. She wrote through day and night, only breaking to eat, pee, shower, and work.
She didn't know until the landlord told her that Black, who he knew as Chiron had made payments on his apartment through the next year and requested that she stay in it in his stead. She moved to his fully furnished and fully stocked unit, grateful but also sad about how it came about. He was truly a gem.
With so much inspiration and so much to get out, Gabriella kept writing. She wrote about everything from her life with her abusive husband to her move and all the things she experienced. A lot of what she wrote was about Black.. and his innocence on more than one level. She changed the names in her story and submitted it to a publisher, and to her surprise, her books sold like hot cakes. She put it on his books and in a fund that would be waiting on him whenever he got out and she she was keeping track.
Every other week, she visited Black, and each time, he came to meet her with a small smile.
He couldn't be her man because he was gayer than Winnie the Pooh, but she'd finally made a true friend.. and on top of that..
She was a best-selling author under her alias. She had everything she could want.
@dashhoney25 @lettidarawest @soufcakmistress @ljstraightnochaser @princessstevens @eye-raq @thiccdaddy-mbaku @destinio1 @iamrheaspeaks @hidden-treasures21 @bidibidibombaclaat @forbeautyandlife @blowmymbackout @misspooh @thotyana-in-this-hoe @purplehairgawdess @thegucciwaffle @goddessofthundathighs @nobodybaby93 @theegoldenchild @thadelightfulone @sultanabby @mysticalblackhottie @baekhyunbabybunni @fd-writes @richonne4life @tgigoldie @thehomierobbstark @capswife @blackpinup22 @harleycativy @lishabaybee @playgurlxoxo
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deathsmallcaps · 1 year
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@kim-poce won this round! The 46th Win a Commission was John Henry! If you’d like to see my artistic interpretation along with the story & an explanation, please
People still talk about the night John Henry was born. It was dark and cloudy. Then, lightning lit up the night sky. John Henry’s birth was a big event. His parents showed him to everyone they met. John Henry was the most powerful looking baby people had ever seen. He had thick arms, wide shoulders and strong muscles. John Henry started growing when he was one day old. He continued growing until he was the strongest man who ever lived.
John Henry grew up in a world that did not let children stay children for long. One day, he was sitting on his father’s knee. The boy picked up a small piece of steel and a workman’s tool, a hammer. He looked at the two objects, then said, “A hammer will be the death of me.”
Before John Henry was six years old, he was carrying stones for workers building a nearby railroad. By the age of ten, he worked from early in the morning until night. Often, he would stop and listen to the sound of a train far away. He told his family, “I am going to be a steel-driver some day.”
Steeldrivers helped create pathways for the railroad lines. These laborers had the job of cutting holes in rock. They did this by hitting thick steel drills, or spikes. By the time John Henry was a young man, he was one of the best steeldrivers in the country. He could work for hours without missing a beat. People said he worked so fast that his hammer moved like lightning.
John Henry was almost six and a half feet tall. He weighed more than two hundred pounds, and it was pure muscle. He had a beautiful deep voice, and played an instrument called a banjo. John Henry married another steel-driver, a woman named Polly Ann. They had a son.
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John Henry went to work as a steel-driver for the Chesapeake and Ohio Railroad, or C-and-O. The company asked him to lead workers on a project to extend the railroad into the Allegheny Mountains. The workers made good progress on the project until they started working near Big Bend Mountain in West Virginia.
The company’s owners said the mountain was too big to build a railroad around it. So the workers were told they had to force their drills through it. This meant creating a tunnel more than three miles long.
The project required about one thousand laborers and lasted three years. Pay was low and the work was difficult. The workers had to breathe thick black smoke and dust. Hundreds of men became sick. Many died.
John Henry was the strongest and fastest man there. He used a hammer that weighed more than twenty pounds. Some people say he was able to cut a path of thirty feet a day.
That July was the hottest month ever in West Virginia. Many workers became tired and weak in the heat. John Henry was concerned his friends might lose their jobs. So, he picked up their hammers and began doing their work.
One week, he did his own work and that of several other steeldrivers. He worked day and night, rarely stopping to eat. The men thanked John Henry for his help. He just smiled and said, “A man ain’t nothing but a man. He has just got to do his best.”
The extreme heat continued for weeks. One day, a salesman came to the work area with a new drilling machine powered by steam. He said it could drill holes faster than twelve men working together. The railroad company planned to buy the machine if it worked as well as the salesman said.
The supervisor of the workers dismissed the salesman’s claims. He said, “I have the best steel-driver in the country. His name is John Henry, and he can beat more than twenty men working together.” The salesman disputed the statements. He said the company could have the machine without cost if John Henry was faster.
The supervisor called to John Henry. He said, “This man does not believe that you can drill faster. How about a race?’
John Henry looked at the machine and saw images of the future. He saw machines taking the place of America’s best laborers. He saw himself and his friends unemployed and standing by a road, asking for food. He saw men losing their families and their rights.
So John Henry told the supervisor he would never let the machine take his job. His friends all cheered. However, John Henry’s wife Polly Ann was not happy.
“Competing against the machine will be the death of you,” she said. “You have a wife and a child. If anything happens to you, we will never smile again.”
John Henry lifted his son into the air. He told his wife, “A man ain’t nothing but a man. But, a man always has to do his best. Tomorrow, I will take my hammer and drive that steel faster than any machine.”
On the day of the big event, many people came to Big Bend Mountain to watch. John Henry and the salesman stood side by side. Even early in the day, the sun was burning hot.
The competition began. John Henry kissed his hammer and started working. At first, the steam-powered drill worked two times faster than he did. Then, he started working with a hammer in each hand. He worked faster and faster. In the mountain, the heat and dust were so thick that most men would have had trouble breathing. The crowd shouted as clouds of dust came from inside the mountain.
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The salesman was afraid when he heard what sounded like the mountain breaking. However, it was only the sound of John Henry at work.
Polly Ann and her son cheered when the machine was pulled from the tunnel. It had broken down. Polly Ann urged John Henry to come out. But he kept working, faster and faster, his heart matching the beat of his hammers. He dug deep into the darkness, hitting the steel so hard that his body began to fail him. He became weak, and his heart burst.
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John Henry fell to the ground. There was a terrible silence. Polly Ann and his son ran over to grasp his hands. John Henry’s blood spilled over the ground. But he still held one of the hammers.
“I beat them,” he said.
His son cried out, “Don’t go!”
“I love you,” he said. Then he took his last breath.
Friends carried his body from the mountain. They buried him near the house where he was born, and sat a warrior’s vigil for three days. It took a long time for his family to smile again.
Years later, the steam drill and other machines replaced the steeldrivers. Many laborers left their families, looking for work. They took the only jobs they could find. But whenever they heard the thunder echoing through the hills, they remembered the power and soul of their hero, John Henry.
Art Explanation
So, I’ve always been a fan of John Henry. There was a Disney animated short about him where they were clearly inspired by quilts & patterns, and looked partly unfinished, with sketch lines appearing, which is an artistic choice that I love when done correctly (which it was - maybe that’s what inspired my adoration for the Spider-Verse films). I’ve also read a couple storybooks about his legend - so you could say I’ve been pondering this one for a while. However, it didn’t occur to me to do this story until a couple years into making these volumes for you and my other younger cousins. I had originally picked out ‘The Juniper Tree’ for this slot - a dark tale. However, as you grew up (as this all started when you were four) I sensed you wouldn’t enjoy it right now, so I switched it out.
Just like most things, I added my own spin on this story. I copied the majority of the story off the internet, but threw in some details from other versions I liked. Some versions have him born before the Civil War, one of the first born free, and some after, where he takes the symbol of his oppression and turns it into something far more useful. Obviously, I chose the latter. Most also end with Polly Ann being pregnant during the story, and consequently giving birth to their son after. I wanted all three of them to spend time together, though. It’s a shame, but makes for a great story - a legend that is at least a century old and will hopefully live longer. It has such wonderful themes of worker’s rights, passion, humanity vs. machines, and what it means to be a Great Man - to his own family’s detriment.
I had a crush on the Disney John Henry when I was younger, but I didn’t want to simply copy him. So, I kept with the idea that John was older and already had his son, and gave him a mustache! To add onto that, I made Polly Ann thicker and taller. The short! Polly Ann, while lovely, did not make much sense as a fellow steeldriver - she was thin and small. And frankly, I am a little bored of tall men usually only showing interest in much shorter women. So here was a wife to match the giant that was John. As for the son, I tried to make him look mostly like his father but still like his mother. With simpler, uncolored drawing styles, it can be difficult to indicate relation - with so few features and lines to use, it can be difficult to draw a face that isn’t a copy but also isn’t a completely different facade. I think this one turned out alright.
The title largely stemmed from my interest in word art. I drew the hammer (left the strap for after the rest of the letters so I could work the Y into there more organically) and then calculated an equal amount of area for each letter in a fashion that allowed the H to be in the middle of the mallet head on one end but not overly squish the other letters. This allowed me to write ‘Henry’ like a crossword, so I was quite pleased overall.
The second picture came from my interest in showing the Henrys as a happy family - it makes John’s choice all the more bittersweet. Also, I wanted to honor the way the mountains curve and seem to make (rail)roads disappear around the bend, as I am going to college in Appalachia, and have fallen in love with its scenery.
The third picture was the one I was most excited to do. The Disney short has this excellent sequence where the sparks of John’s hammer provide the only light from which you can see the man decimating his way through the great rock. Being lineart and not working with the subtleties of color and the advantage of actual movement, I don’t think I was able to completely capture my intent and vision, but it still communicates what I wanted it to. I used tens of screenshotted frames to try and draw that scene.
Lastly, the crying shot. I was quite pleased (though felt shamefully as though I were a sadist) at how their anguish turned out on their faces and grasping hands, and at the perspective I attempted with John’s feet. I really wanted to push the emotion and enormity.
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9.27.23 Wednesday
9:13 am
Still having windblow....
I'm out of budget but I need these... From the past 16 years since this windblow came into my life, I never had have success on my own... I always feel defeated....
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9:15 am
I'm so thankful that I got the job in Iqor or being on a call center industry again... But the stress it gave me is really hellish....I always feel defeated... But I swallow my pride....I finished B.S. Biology in one of the prestigious universities here in the Philippines but I felt low but I needed money and job,angels... I was never happy until I saw Miles/ dread-locks guy....
I badly need money and job so I have to go back next month... If I'm gonna be rewaved, I wanna be with Miles on his wave in 469...
Why is it hellish? First all the calls are on theme or well-planned or having a conspiracy of what future you will have... But of course you need to use your own shield and sword to protect yourself and battle your customer over the phone...
It is just weird that you have to keep on doing the metrics... Everything must learn and master as time goes by... But there are some arrogant mentors that they are expecting that you will memorize all the loose ends and loophole of each customer's cases... Plus, learning the keyboard again and posting everything on the tracker after that 2 minutes wrap-up or rest, after each call...
Again, learning to flow on different accents and different ways of their delivery of words. Need time to familiarize their other counterparts in USA that you can't access your google.... No choice but to ask or try to listen triple times and try to comprehend the situation of the customer.
I also saw my step-dad on my biological mother, he used to work in an office and he tried to get a job in call center... Like what I said call center is the quickest way to land on if you need a quick money but still tight... It is like eat and work and eat and work, living a lil but still not enough but in a way surviving.... My step-dad got sick and you can really see the stress on him... On and off he got sick while working in call center....
My brother next to me also work in call center the same thing he got sick on and off coz of stress...
I feel super intimidated in call center... But in a way thankful... They can make your emotion up and down... If you don't go down to your superior your will be kicked out right away... You need to call them "boss" or bow down...
The nature of job it is not easy most specially if you are not on computer generation category... It feels like a grade 1 that you have to be on grade 6 in a lil while...
But last time, time that I met Miles after the shift... I learned that life and relationship are not based on this fucking call center job or it will never based on the metrics that you got... It gave you this psychological effect that if you didn't do good on your job being a customer service,you can't get a fucking relationship. Again, it is a skills but it will take time or there is a conspiracy that everything is fated in call center. Who will get promoter, who will be having detractors or me thankful always on the passive or neutral platform.
It is better to be DJ in a way... Listening to radio now...
But there is still an emotion in me that, why other people can do and why I can't... The actual answer learning everything as time goes by not overnight...
But how did other people got their challenger bonus of 100k or more???
I'm just happy and thankful that call center got a free unlimited tissues and I started to worry last Monday why are we out of tissues? Things that I observed..
If you got a supervisor call it will be a big deal on you, a negative issue, right away....It is somehow degrading in my part... But I have to swallow my pride...
11:08 noon
Uncle Jun will not really help me on food... I'm out of budget...
I should be resting and he is still not washing the floor mats.... My salary is just small....This Uncle DD is not yet giving the fundings here...
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3:28 pm
Oopppss... I just realized I had have guardian angels and somehow a back-up on something...
Still, sick...Fever and headache... Congested Nose... Still,having windblow ...
5:16 pm
I'm burning and thinking of money...
Thinking of Miles as well...
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5:29 pm
Still have windblow...
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5:38 pm
If you have a clean conscience, you don't have to worry... Still,thinking of money... Where am I? Pure soul will have a pure good karma...
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6:25 pm
Uncle Jun brought some food and biscuits just this dinner... We will just eat once a day angels, at dinner only... Out of budget...
Whew! Though there is a diet method of eating once a day and drinking more healthy fluids like water or electrolyte.
Tomorrow will buy lemon for the water jug here...
8:38 pm
Here it is angels and my windblow...
The one meal diet plan per day is called "intermittent fasting" in general has proven to be an effective weight-loss method. The typical weight loss is 7 to 11 pounds over 10 weeks. ( google ).
OMAD diet, however, is different. OMAD stands for One Meal a Day; the idea is to fast for 23 hours straight and then consume one large meal in a 60-minute window. The OMAD diet is proposed to be a weight loss method as well as a way to tackle chronic disease and other health issues. ( google ).
Though, not my ideal thing in life Angels... I wanna eat and exercise... I still want the healthy lifestyle where you can eat and sweat-out...
8:49 pm
I love the songs of xxxtentacion...
I still wanna go to sand dunes and get a botox and whatever... I wanna a collagen and I need a retinol serum? Whew!
I need to save money but how?
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8:58 pm
It is sad???
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9:05 pm
I know you so well, so well... I know you somewhere...
I need growth angels... I need money and I need to keep that job! I feel bitterish and self-pitying...
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11:16 pm
I feel bitterish... I really wanna have sex and I'm losing my xfactor... I feel fat, ugly and wrinkled...
I want Miles to be sensitive enough... I feel bitterish...
Still, have windblow...
I still wanna be rewaved on Mile's group... Hmm... I hate being defeated...
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nothing-but-dreamy · 3 years
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AFTERLIFE ~ Part 1
A/N: It's a two part story. It was a bit too long for a one-shot and too short for a series... so, it's something in between. Have fun, nonetheless
Pairing: Connor x Reader
Words: 3165
Warnings: none
Summary: You are 'Amanda'. A personalized interface who works with Connor. You prepare him for his mission, listen to his mission report and you give him new orders.
There's just one thing: you're human.
Connor doesn't know that. For him, you're the person he meets in the zen garden. Even as a machine, he becomes fond of you. Connor wants to please you with fulfilling his mission. And he is successful.
The only thing CyberLife hasn’t considered in their plans was for you to act as the human you were - after everything Connor had to endure, you realize that Connor might be more than just a machine. His deactivation was the last thing you wanted. Maybe both of you have to break free.
The small boat slid through the calm water as it got more push by using the oars. You looked at the android in front of you who sat with you in the boat. There was a small change in him but the system was good at controlling it. No matter what it was, Connor stayed unaffected by it. Even if there was so much going on in Detroit, Connor stayed focused on his mission. His orders were clear. There was no room for any doubts if he wanted to stop the deviants how CyberLife wanted it. How you demanded it from him.
“If your investigation doesn’t make progress soon, I may have to replace you, Connor.”, you said serious. Connor’s reaction was under your close monitoring. The android blinked and processed the new information before he looked into your eyes. Something was blazing in them but before you could say what it was, it was gone. His system worked perfectly.
“I’m of no importance. The mission is all that matters.”, Connor said calmly.
*
Hell, how you hated it when Connor was this … machine-like. Of course, that was what he was on the paper: a machine. An android designed to accomplish a certain task. But for you he started to become more… “Why do I have to threaten him?”, you asked Jim, your supervisor, as you left the port which was your connection to the zen garden. You had left the station the moment as Connor went back to his mission.
“Otherwise, it wouldn’t understand how important this mission is.”, Jim said matter of factly and reminded you that Connor was still an android, built by CyberLife. He was their property.
“Connor knows it and does his best!”, you argued.
Jim smirked viciously while he stepped closer to you. “You humanize it. Maybe you’re not the right choice to be its interface after all. Maybe we should replace you, yn.”
“What? No!”, you said erratically.
“Then make sure that the RK800 will be successful.”, Jim demanded and turned around to leave you alone.
***
Connor had been successful no matter what your personal thoughts had been about the whole mission and its outcome. You checked some of the recordings Connor had made to know what was going on in the real world while you were in your safe office. The worst thing for you to witness was the suicide of Hank. Connor had visited his former partner to say goodbye because he was successful in finding Jericho. Next, he would search and stop the deviant leader and after that, he would go back to CyberLife to receive the next orders. Connor stood on the pavement and his system listed an extreme reaction as he heard the shot back in Hank’s house. Even the dog was whining. You winced as you watched this record. All of this wasn’t right. You also felt responsible for the man’s death...and for everything else that went wrong the last few days.
“Yn.”, Jim said and made you jump by surprise.
You turned off the display while your heart was racing against your ribcage. “Hell, Jim! That wasn’t necessary. Wait- what’s that?”, you asked as you noticed the android standing next to Jim.
Jim looked from you at the android with a proud expression like a father would watch his son. “This is the new RK900 or… Colden, what its name will be. I think the name perfectly suits its mindstrong manner. Don’t you think?”
“RK900? You… you’re going to replace Connor.”, you said low, slowly understanding what was going on.
“That’s correct.”, Jim confirmed your assumption and sounded like an android by himself.
“But Connor, it … he did everything we demanded! He was successful with his mission!”, you pointed out. Frustration was rushing through you as you realized what that meant: no matter what Connor did it wouldn’t save him from deactivation. There would be no reward after Connor was done.
“That’s true. The RK800 was the biggest success like no other model before. That’s why we built Colden. It’s based on the RK800 model but the RK900 is more resilient, more advanced and equipped with more features than the old model.”, Jim sounded like a salesman for his own product.
“But Connor, he… ��, you said meekly. The anger in your body made you speechless.
“The RK800 will be replaced by this new model and you will tell Connor our decision. You’re its interface. It’s your job.”, Jim said and left you alone with the RK900 who watched you emotionless. You walked over to it. It looked like Connor and yet, it was the complete opposite to the android you liked so much. The RK900 was slightly taller, had piercing blue eyes, darker hair and looked all in all very intimidating while Connor looked so soft and nice with his warm brown eyes and smooth hair. The RK900 stared at you unfazed while you examined it. Never in this life you would be able to build a connection to this android like you did with Connor. Something came up into your mind. You had to make a decision.
***
Connor watched you caring for the beautiful roses you had gardened whenever he met you. They were beautiful flowers and he had to admit that they were the only appropriate flower that could keep up with your own beauty. You looked delicate and strong at the same time. Your eyes were the most beautiful color he had ever seen and your lips … they had the same deep red color like the velvet patels of the rose in your hand.
For him, it was everything to meet you because in the end, you were the one he wanted to please. During this mission, there were a few things that went wrong and Connor was sure that he had seen disappointment in your eyes. That was the worst for Connor: to know that you weren’t happy with him and his progress. But now, where he had stopped the deviants and had eliminated every single threat, you had to be proud of him. Everything he had done was for you and he was more than just successful as he had accomplished his mission.
“Connor, I‘m so glad to see you.”, you said with a soft smile as you turned around to face the android. You felt sick and the only thing you wanted was to scream because of the big lies you had told him all the time. Connor watched you with his calm brown eyes. There was even a small, lovely smile on his lips which made it even worse when you thought about what would come next. “I have a surprise for you.”, you announced with sweating hands and an erratic heartbeat while you acted as if everything was perfect.
Connor watched you patiently and curious. He never had expected to get a reward. After all, he was still a machine who had just fulfilled his orders.
“This is the new RK900. It’s stronger, faster and more resilient.”, you said with your shaking hand placed on the back of the other android.
Connor tilted his head as he tried to understand what that meant. “What is going to happen to me?”, he asked.
You heard the tone in his voice. There was surprise and something else. He understood what the RK900 meant but he couldn’t grasp it. You walked slowly over to Connor who watched you curiously. You hoped he would break free, that he would finally realize what all this meant, that he would make a decision to say no to CyberLife and their cruel game but no, he just stood there and waited for your verdict.
“You’ve become obsolete. You’ll be deactivated. You can go now.”, you said softly and as calm as possible. That was so wrong and you hated yourself for every single word you said. Connor was the last who deserved any of this. Not after everything.
Without another word, Connor looked at you one last time before he turned around to leave the zen garden. There was something in his system that was new…
software instability^
The alert popped up but he couldn’t understand the cause of it or its meaning. If Connor would be a deviant or human he would have understood that it was betrayal he felt but as a machine, he had no idea what the alert wanted to tell him.
"Connor wait!", you called out.
Connor stopped and turned around. He watched you coming closer. Worry was written on your face and he asked himself what might be the reason.
You wanted to say something but you couldn’t. You released your breath, annoyed about yourself. It was a nightmare. All of it. “Y-you- hell, it's nothing.", you said defeated. You couldn’t say what you wanted because CyberLife recorded the zen garden. Whatever you would do would go straight to your supervisor.
Connor couldn’t understand what made you so...nervous but as you stayed silent, there was nothing else he could do than just to leave.
The RK900 watched after Connor. It noticed the troubles in Connor’s system. It noticed the software instability. The RK900 observed its previous model how it walked away to get deactivated. But it couldn’t totally understand why the RK800 seemed to be troubled. As an emotionless machine, deactivation wasn’t the same as dying like humans did.
You walked back frustrated. Your eyes fell on the RK900 who looked after Connor. You saw its ice cold glance glued at its ‘brother’. “And now, what? I’m sure CyberLife expects me to become your interface as well, huh?”, you asked rhetorically. You were sure the RK900 wasn’t understanding what you were talking about or that it could process properly what was going on. Sure, it was able to process the information but it was something else to understand all the meanings behind it. As the RK900 looked at you, you made a decision that was long overdue. Maybe, Connor wasn’t just the only one who had to break free.
***
As you left the port to the zen garden, you closed the program as usual. You ended all systems and turned off the lights. After you collected all your stuff and your purse, you waved goodbye to your colleagues. But instead of going left you decided to go right. Left down the hallway was the elevator that would bring you to your car. But the right way brought you to the destination you had to visit. It was friday and so, most of your colleagues were gone. But nevertheless, you were carefully sneaking through the hallway. At the end of it, there was the room you had searched for.
Androids could enter the zen garden no matter where they were but there was also a port-like room inside of CyberLife where the androids could pause while they were entering the zen garden. In Connor’s case, he stayed in this room even now because he would get deactivated. So, there was no reason for him to leave the room until someone would get him.
You slipped through the door. The room was huge but not equipped with any kind of furniture. There was no need to make it comfortable for androids. Now, where you had made your decision it was repulsive to be in this room with the knowledge what some of the androids in this room were going to face soon. Like Connor.
Your eyes fell on the android with the grey jacket who stood in a corner with closed eyes. He was in standby mode, just waiting patiently. “Connor! Connor, wake up!”, you whispered urgently while you shook his shoulder. The light of the blue LED increased its speed, the sign that the system woke up.
Slowly, he opened his eyes and looked at you, his eyebrows raised questioningly. “Yn? What’s the matter? Why are you here?”, he asked. Connor never had met you outside of the zen garden and now, he was confused to see you in front of him in this sterile, white room. For him, you belonged into the beautiful garden.
“We have not much time. You have to come with me.”, you whispered, grabbing his arm to pull him after you but you stumbled back as Connor stayed motionless on the spot. “Connor, please.”, you begged.
“Why? What is going on?”, he asked confused. His face frozen in a puzzled expression.
“What is going on?! Connor, you’re going to be deactivated! We have to get you out of here!”, you said urgently. A movement on the hallway caught your attention but it was just someone walking by. It was just a matter of time until someone would enter this room. You turned back to Connor who still watched you. Since when was this android so hard of understanding? “Listen, Connor, I know I said you would be obsolete but I … I had to say that, okay? But I don’t want you to be deactivated.”
“Why not?”, Connor asked confused and tilted his head to the side.
You groaned. It was frustrating. Connor was adorable and driving you crazy at the same time. “Because I like you, okay? You’re not just some android. That CyberLife wants to destroy you isn’t fair after everything you had done for them.”
“But I hadn’t done it for them. I did it for you, yn. You gave me the orders.”, Connor said matter of factly.
You closed your eyes to calm your nerves but then, you had an idea. “That’s right! You did it for me. And now, I ask you to do something else for me, Connor. Now, you have to come with me.” Much to your relief, Connor followed your ‘order’. Yes, you had to trick him but in the end, if it would be the only way he would follow you, then you would use all the tricks you could find to get him out of this building. In the end, to get Connor following you was the easy part of your plan. To get Connor through the building and into your car was the thing that worried you the most.
Connor noticed your nervousness. Your heart rate increased and you started to gnaw on your lower lip, something you never had done before in front of him. “You’re nervous, yn.”, he stated as you stopped at a corner to look down the next hallway which led to the elevator.
You turned around, “Of course, I’m nervous! We have to get out of here unseen. Otherwise, I’m not sure if I can get you free. Please, Connor, can you work with me here? It would be easier if you start to feel something!”
“To feel? What shall I feel? I’m a machine.”, Connor argued.
You bit down on your lower lip. Now, it was biting you back that you had trained him so well to be a machine. “Then stop being a machine, god damnit! I know you can turn-”, you stopped as someone walked into your direction. You grabbed Connor’s hand to pull him after you into an empty office. The lights were out and the workers were gone already. You closed the door at the same moment the person passed you. With a racing heart, you leant against the closed door. With slow and regular breathing you tried to slow down your pulse.
Connor watched you. You still held his hand in yours. Your warm skin against his shot something through his system.
software instability^
He felt something. The former signal popped up but he couldn’t completely understand what the reaction meant.
You looked up to the android in front of you. He just stood there looking at you dressed with his grey uniform and his LED spinning in a calming blue. Suddenly, it striked you: the clothes! Dressed like this, he was noticeable for everyone. “We have to get you other clothes.”
“Other clothes? I don’t see why-”, Connor started confused.
It was the moment where you lost your patience. You stepped in front of Connor to cup his face with your hands to get his full attention. “If I don’t get you out of here, you will be dead. You get it? You will die and that’s not what I want for you, okay? Yes, I gave you all the orders for your mission but just because CyberLife demanded it from me. I… I guess, I’m like you… a machine which was taking orders. But we will change that! I will get you out of here so you won’t die.”, you said meaningfully.
software instability^
Connor watched you curiously. There were so many impressions he had to deal with at the same time. Your small hands on his cheeks, your desperate voice and the way how concerned you looked at him. Slowly, he started to understand. “You… you want to save me. You fear for my life.”
“Yes! That is what I told you before. So, can you please work with me?”, you asked but before Connor could answer, your eyes fell on something hanging on the back of a chair. It was a black jacket and a black hoodie. You went over to the things and picked them up. They were big enough that they would fit Connor. “Undress your jacket and shirt to change into this.”, you said and gave Connor the clothes. Without another question, he obeyed and did what you said. As he started to unbutton his white suit shirt, you turned around to look somewhere else. Otherwise, you feared Connor would notice your reddening cheeks.
software instability^
But Connor had seen it because you hadn’t been fast enough to turn around. As he looked at you, he noticed the glance in your eyes. Something was blazing he couldn’t grasp and as you turned away, the impression was gone. But the blushing of your cheeks made you look even more beautiful.
A few minutes later, you turned back to him with a smile on your lips that had an effect on his system. “You look good.”, you said appreciatively. In fact, the casual look was making him even more handsome. Just the blue LED let you frown. “Maybe you should get rid of this, as well.”, you said and pointed at the LED.
Connor took a pair of scissors, walked over to a mirror and removed the LED carefully. Through the mirror, he saw your surprised and concerned expression. The LED was falling on the ground and Connor watched how the spot covered itself with the synthetic skin. Only then, he turned around back to you.
With slow moves, you walked over to Connor who watched every single step of you closely. Carefully, you took the hood of the sweatshirt to don it over Connor’s hair. “You look very manlike. Now, we will go to my car. Behave as human as you can.”, you instructed softly and Connor nodded. Once again, he wanted to make you proud.
software instability^
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cipheress-to-k-pop · 3 years
Note
Pls could you do a Bad Ben x reader?
Why I Hate Bellwood 
Pairing: (Bad) Ben Tennyson x Reader
Warnings: Sexual assault and harassment themes
Word Count: 2.1k
Summary: You don’t think there’s anything redeemable or good about Ben Tennyson until he saves you from a dangerous situation.
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You hated living in Bellwood. It was the worst place to be and you couldn’t even imagine how it was a functioning city. It was a town rampant with criminals and villains. In a place where the crime rate not only sky-rocketed each week but also where no one gave any damn to change it.
They even had their own super-powered thief. Of course.
Coincidentally, the town you hated the most also happened to be the place where you were transferred to. Maybe it was because your supervisor wanted to send the most capable and competent student there. Or maybe it was because you ran your mouth and chewed out her daughter (who had a severe case of princess syndrome).
You and your big mouth.
You had a small studio apartment that could barely fit a bed and that made you feel claustrophobic. Even though you wanted a bigger place, this was the only apartment you could find that was in your price range and in the safer parts of town. Relatively speaking.
Even though you made a conscious effort to stay out of trouble, it seemed to present itself to you on a silver platter. Or more accurately, a stolen silver platter. The trouble you were talking about was Ben Tennyson himself, the friendly neighbourhood criminal.
It was absurd to think that a boy your age could have his entire town at his mercy because of a fancy watch but it was true. He was terrifying, and more importantly, unstoppable. So, you tried your hardest to stay out of his sight, and out of his way.
Unfortunately, that seemed like it wouldn’t happen either. Not even a week after you had moved, you had found out that the crazy crime lord that you had been trying to avoid was living in the apartment next to yours. And not only were you neighbours, but you could see right into his room through the window.
Not like you tried. You had been too afraid to even open the window.
How could this be the safest place in town if this maniac was living right across from you?
Although when you asked the other women in the building, they had told you that was the whole point. Ben Tennyson was a ruthless maniac and known criminal. That’s why no sane person would come into a mile of his home.
All they had to do was avoid him like the plague and so would the other criminals.
And in the psychotic, irrational fashion that was accustomed to Bellwood, that actually made sense. And knowing that Ben was living right across from you was a sign of extreme comfort but also fear.
Would he kill you if you snored too loudly in the night? Or if you kept the lights on in the night and disturbed him?
The fear you had made you want to fall beneath his radar and go completely unnoticed by him. You would stay out of his sight and completely out of his life until you completed your work and could return home.
That had been the plan.
Until one day you had been returning from your classes a little later than usual. It was already dark out and there were fewer cars out on the roads. Walking through the streets alone made an eery feeling settle in your veins and you pumped your legs faster, breaking out into a run.
Just as the busy intersection came into your sights, somebody stepped in front of you and you stopped instinctively. Even though you shouldn’t have. It was a broad man, who had tattoos covering his arms up until his neck. He grinned widely at you, but it was a sick smile that made you gulp and back away.
You didn’t take your eyes off him, scared that he was going to make a sudden move. But just as you began backing away, you collided into someone and when you turned around, ice settled in your veins to see another man smirking at you.
You were immediately frozen in fear, breaths shortening in your chest when his hands came towards you. You wanted to run away from there. But they seemed to realize what your plan was.
They grabbed you, hands digging painfully into your arms and you yelped, resisting in their grip.
“Oh, now sweetheart, don’t fight, it’s not gonna be fun for you if you do.”
Tears started burning your eyes and panic burned through your chest, “Let—Let me go.”
They didn’t reply, only chuckling in response but their grip got tighter when you started thrashing. Your mind went blank, reducing to instincts and you began screaming as tears escaped your eyes.
The men’s faces hardened and they started dragging you with them, not fazed by your rapid kicking and squeezing your throat when you started screaming and crying again.
You had never been so scared in your entire life. They got closer to a dark alley and your breaths shortened, crying out and begging against the hand slapped over your mouth but they didn’t hear or they didn’t care.
Just as they pulled you into the shadows of the alley, there was a bright flash of light from its depths. Your eyes burned from the brightness but you still didn’t close them, scared that something would happen in the second you did.
Because you kept them peeled open, you were able to make out the silhouette of some creature before the light faded. It moved too quickly for your eyes to process, especially in your state of fear, but in a second, the pressure of the men pressed to your front and back had disappeared.
The figures were knocked over like small boys and you heard the sounds of their grunts. Even though you felt immense relief, you were still frozen. You didn’t even bother moving from your place when the creature came to stand in front of you.
“Who the fuck dares to mess with us.” One of them growled, standing up. You couldn’t see anything in the dark and you just chose to grip tightly onto the straps on your back, clenching your jaw tightly.
The bright light came back and you glanced up to see the figure get reduced to a boy. He held up his watch, it glowing in the night and you finally saw his face. He was glaring darkly at the men, lips turned in a frightening scowl.
“Who the fuck dares to mess with a defenceless woman.” He spat and they froze, realizing who they were talking to.
“Holy shit, it’s Ben Tennyson.”
He glared at them, seeing the way they were turned, probably about to make a break for it, “If you even think of running, I will hunt you down like the dogs you are.”
He then turned to you, holding up the watch to your face. You finally got a good look at his face, dark hair and deep green eyes. His face was innocent and charming, even though you knew he was rougher around the edges. Even then, he looked safe, like he’d protect you.
You, on the other hand, looked like a mess. Eyes red and tears streaming down your cheeks, your clothes were dishevelled and your hair because of the way they yanked it.
Ben’s jaw tightened, noting the way you were still sobbing quietly into your hand but when his eyes handed on the bruises around your neck, you saw the unadulterated rage that boiled over on his face.
He turned into another alien, pinning the two men against the wall by their necks. They choked, gasping for the breath that got knocked out of them but Ben didn’t care, his grip only got tighter when they started begging.
“You didn’t hear her when she was crying? You didn’t stop when she was in pain? Then why the fuck should I?” He spat and you felt mixed emotions. For a second, you were relieved and flattered he was sticking up for you. And then you were reminded of the way these men were overpowering you mere minutes before.
Even though you didn’t have a reason to be afraid now, the terror still returned and your knees buckled, sending you to the ground as a choked sob left your lips.
Ben glanced back at you, eyes softening just for a second before he turned back to the monsters that were left at his mercy. They cowered at his gaze and tried mangling out some pleas through the grip he had on their throats but he felt disgusted to even be touching them.
“If you even touch another woman like that in my town, I will rip your fingers off and feed them to you. The only reason I’m letting you go is so that you can spread the word to other lowlifes like you.” He spoke lowly, loosening his grip and they fell to the floor, nodding and apologizing.
They tried to come closer to you, to apologize but you cowered, backing away with a whimper and Ben growled at them before pointing at you, “Her especially. If I ever see you within 50 feet of her, I won’t be so kind.”
They nodded wordlessly before running away, tails tucked between their legs and only when the sound of their footsteps completely disappeared were you finally able to breath.
Ben gently knelt in front of you. He made no move to touch you, only watching as you lifted your head to meet his eyes and your chest cleared. You felt unbelievable relief looking at him.
Before you could control yourself, you started sobbing uncontrollably, launching yourself into his arms and throwing yours around his neck. He stiffened for a minute before relaxing, gently holding your body against his, knowing that you just needed to be comforted.
Eventually, your cries lulled down and you were left feeling exhausted, but he still didn’t let go.
“I thought you were supposed to be the bad guy?” You asked breathlessly and he smirked at you.
“I am, but I have some class. Touching someone against their consent is beneath me.” He said it with so much disgust in his voice that you believed him. You always thought he was just like them, a lowlife and mangy criminal, but looking at him now, he was much more honourable than you realized.
“Come on, I wanna get back home.”
Even though he was holding out his hand for you to take, you still couldn’t move from your place on the floor, staring up at him with wide eyes. You thought he was supposed to be a criminal. Why was he being so good to you?
“Ask me something.” He said suddenly and you flinched. Ben looked down at you and pursed his lips. He knew you needed to get your mind off whatever just happened.
“What?”
“I’m giving you permission to ask me something. Anything. You’re getting a really rare chance here.”
Of course, a million and one questions were going through your head. Why did he help you? Was he really a bad guy? Was he a misunderstood person? Like Robin Hood?
Even with so many thoughts rushing through your head, when you opened your mouth, the only thing that slipped out was, “Is it true you walk around in your apartment without your shirt?”
You had heard about it from the girl who lived in the apartment before you and had been too scared to look out the window to prove her right or wrong. You don’t know why you were so curious about it, just because you wondered whether he was comfortable enough to roam around without his shirt on or whether he really didn’t care.
Ben smirked at you, “Why? Interested in the view?”
Your face went red, “No, I just heard it from someone.”
“My hand is getting tired.”
You looked at his hand again, still held out for you to take. Gingerly, you slipped your palm into his and he held onto your hand firmly, pulling you to your feet. You were still tense, looking around suspiciously and huddling a little closer to him.
“Let’s go, no one’s gonna be stupid enough to come near you while I’m here.”
“I can trust you right?”
He sent you a smirk that made you uneasy and flustered at the same time, “At your own risk.”
Looking down at your intertwined hands, you figured you might just take it.
Forever Taglist:
@simonsbluee
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dustofbrokenheart · 3 years
Text
The Covenant: Lazy, Summer Day
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Tyler Simms x Reader
Word Count: 1,650
Summary: Tyler and reader enjoy a day on the water to get away from the heat. Based on this post by @saviorsong​ which you should all totally check out! 
“I called in sick?”
“Yeah, this morning. See? We crossed your name off the schedule and everything.” A finger tapped rapidly on the big whiteboard that had everyone’s name written in dry erase marker.
Sure enough, there was a hastily drawn line going right through the middle of yours.
They really had thought you weren’t coming in. “That’s impossible,” you said confused. “Because I didn’t call in sick.”
“Alright, alright. I believe you,” the supervisor said. “You’re one of the normaler ones that we have and a normal person wouldn’t have driven clear across town when they already had the day off.”
Both of you stood there scratching your heads. Your thoughts were leaning towards this possibly being a dream. You had weird dreams all the time, right? And it wasn’t unlike you to be dreaming of work even when you were off the clock.
There was a good chance you would wake up any second now, still swaddled in bed sheets.
The supervisor had a completely different reaction. “Well, the building ghost strikes again! They must’ve called on your behalf knowing how hard you’ve been working. Just take the day off. We’re covered anyway.”
“Are you sure?” you hesitated. It felt weird taking the day for yourself when you were perfectly able to work. “Since I’m here, I could do—”
“Nope. Enjoy some of this weather. Summer is almost over, you know.”  
With that you were ushered out the door and left standing on the concrete sidewalk, not a clue as to what you should do.
There were always things to be done at the apartment. You hadn’t cleaned the bathroom in a while…yikes. Tyler also had his collection of expired leftovers in the fridge that he was terrible about tracking of.
Oh! You could wash the cars, too! Tyler had finally gotten rid of his monstrosity of a Hummer a few summers back in favor of a classic sixties car that Pogue had helped him fix-up. He liked to keep it spotless.
Speaking of his car…you looked up and noticed it parked across the street. And it was definitely his. Not only were there not many of them still out on the roads, but that was clearly Tyler smiling at you in the driver’s seat as he waved you over.
“Were you flagging me down this whole time?” you asked. He nodded with a heavy dose of enjoyment sparkling in those baby blue eyes. “Sorry. It’s been a weird morning.”
“Didn’t expect to have to day off?” Tyler’s smile becoming more pronounced.
“Of course not—wait,” you trailed off in realization. “It was you. You’re the one who called in sick for me!”
He stroked your wrist through the window with his thumb. “You caught me. But don’t be mad, I promise it was for the greater good.”
Greater good? You raised both eyebrows. “And what’s the ‘good’ in question?”
“Weather man predicted we’re supposed to hit high eighties today. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t drag you to the lake house to take advantage of it?”
“That’s a terrible excuse, Ty.”
“Fine,” he admitted with a laugh. “How about you’ve been working this whole summer, and I miss you and want to do something nice for you?”
On the inside you felt yourself vibrate with excitement but you tried to keep it together. You shouldn’t encourage him making plans without you, especially when they disrupted work, but you were a sucker for surprises. “Better,” you admitted with your nose titled up.
And he knew that. Knew that you weren’t really cross with him as he turned the engine over, jolting the car to life with a heavy rumble. “Come on, my lady. I promise that it’ll be fun.”
The lake house in question referred to one of several Simms family properties in Massachusetts, appropriately named for it’s position right next to a small, picturesque lake. The area was naturally beautiful with shimmering water that was encased by tall, shady trees that were a godsend when the sun became too much to handle.
The drive there went like it always did: fast, thanks to a good playlist and easy conversation, and soon Tyler was pulling up to the lake house.  
Not wanting him to fixate on the fine dust the gravel kicked up, and how it was dirtying the car, you leaned over the center console to kiss him. It was just long enough to steal his attention.
When his hand cupped the back of your head, you pulled back. “Last one to the dock has to use the tacky orange kayak!” You stuck your tongue out at him as you dashed out of the car and towards the dock.
Unprepared for the challenge, Tyler sputtered as he tried to take his seat belt off with clumsy fingers.
You ran around the outside of the house and dodged trees as best as you could, laughing the whole way. You may have gotten the head start but you could hear the tell tale sounds of the man gaining ground behind you.
The dock was so close you could picture your victory as. Only a few steps more, you would’ve had it.
Then two arms wrapped around your middle in a steel tight grip, halting you in your tracks. A large exhale was forced out of your lungs at the sudden impact.
“No fair,” you whined. Slumping back into his embrace, you turned to look at his smug face. “I can’t match your stupid arm strength.”
Tyler laughed, the argument a familiar one. “We’ve been over this. If you can use the element of surprise, then the element of muscle is fair game.”
That was the agreement but that didn’t mean you couldn’t pout. Not everyone was blessed with good genetics and years of a background in competitive swimming.
“Well, let’s consider this a tie then because I refuse to use that hideous orange boat.”
Tyler hummed, the vibration noticeable against your back. “Nope,” he said. The answer was abrupt and before you could get another word out, you were sailing through the air, lake water rushing to swallow you up.
The shock made your lungs seize up and your limbs flailed in the haze of the foggy water.
Breaking the surface, hair and clothes plastered to your skin you paddled around to glare at him. The effect didn’t have the ferocity you hoped for because he merely but his hands on his knees and laughed so hard it seemed like he might tip over.
Dodging the water you splashed at him, he got the laughs under control and walked to the edge of the dock to give you a hand. You glared at it personally offended by the gesture. Those were the hands that had just thrown you in without any warning.
But Tyler was patient and held his hand out steadily until you were ready to grab hold of it. For a moment, you debated trying to sink him to the murky depths along with you, but as his impressive looking biceps flexed under the warm glow of the sun, you realized you’d have to take revenger later when you were more certain of your success.
With the added help, you hauled up to the dock. The access water from your clothes ran off, darkening the wood in random splatter patterns, and you realized for the first time that it was pretty hot out.
The sun was bright even with your hand covering your eyes as you looked up; not a cloud in the sky as the bugs buzzed around lazily.
“Sorry.” Tyler fidgeted awkwardly, bringing your attention back to down earth. “I didn’t mean to be, well, mean.”
“Most people would think you’re an angel but you surely have a competitive streak, Tyler Simms.”
He shrugged apologetically. After a moment, he stood up and called over his shoulder as he jogged away. “I’ll go grab a towel for you. Meet me in the cabin!”
It was hard to stay mad at him. Especially when he tried to make up for it by doing something cute, like literally running to get a towel. He really was puppy-like; a little reckless but very contrite when he realized he messed up.
True to his word, he did bring you a towel along with a whole bag of clothes he had packed for the trip. Figuring it’d be a waste to dry your hair—you’d be on the water soon again any way—you settled for patting down the rest of your body and changed into extra clothes.
After Tyler managed to coerce you into putting on sun block (he was strict about it, likely leftover from his swimming days, while you tended to be lazy about it), it was back to lake where each of you set off in a kayak.
And even though he had won the bet earlier, he took mercy and neither of you had to row in the garish orange kayak; a mercy on both pairs of eyes, to be sure.
The sun turned sweltering before it had even reached its highest point, the heat feeling like pin pricks all over your body. The water definitely helped. Between kayaking, swimming, and even a brief diving contest off the end of the dock, you kept cool enough.
Enjoying a late lunch under the shade of a large tree, you felt the pull of an after-lunch nap calling your name.
Tyler noticed the way your eyelids drooped and laid down on the blanket and pulled you into his chest. “Nap time?”
Utterly content, you nodded languidly.
“Alright then, let’s nap.” He pressed a soft kiss into your hair. “Thanks for letting me drag you here. This is perfect...”
The was the last words you heard as the summer heat, filling lunch, and buzz of cicadas lulled you to sleep.
_______________
We could all use a summer day like this. I’m contemplating writing more based on the other boys’ preferences too, but we’ll see. Hopefully this one was enjoyable! 
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coldflame96 · 3 years
Text
Lunch Break
Summary: Tohru skips lunch to avoid being an inconvenience. Thankfully, she has a loving huband to set her straight. 
Rating: G
Also found on AO3 and FF.net
Inspired by a RL situation with a friend of mine. 
The store was busy today. She hadn’t eaten since breakfast and she was starting to get hungry. They had just finished with the last customer in line. 
“Hey, Tohru-kun,” Her supervisor got her attention, “I know it’s kinda late, but did you wanna take your lunch break?”
“Yes,” she sighed in relief. “Thank you, Kaori-san.”
She opened the mini fridge and felt her heart skip a beat. It was empty...She thought back to when she had left this morning and rested her head on the counter, groaning. She must’ve forgotten it in the fridge this morning.
“What’s wrong?” Kaori-san asked. 
“I was in such a rush this morning I forgot my lunch,” she admitted shamefully. 
“Oh, well that’s no big deal! Just go to the cafe around the corner. Kenji-kun is working and he likes me so just tell him I sent you and he’ll make whatever you want for free.”
“I can’t do that!” 
“Eh? Why? Will your husband get jealous? He doesn’t have to know.”
She shook her head. “Kenji-kun is always working so hard I can’t trouble him like that!”
“Trouble him?” Kaori-san laughed. “Man, you’re really funny sometimes, Tohru-kun.” She frowned. She was sure Kaori-san didn’t mean anything by it, but sometimes it felt like she was a small child being dismissed even though they were close to the same age. She didn’t really like it...
“Oh! Good afternoon!” Kaori-san greeted as the bell rung. 
Well...her shift was over soon anyway. Might as well just hold out until she got home. She would be fine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She wasn’t fine. It had been a rough day. She ended up having to stay three hours later than initially planned due to a coworker calling off sick. She clenched her stomach. She was so hungry! 
On shaky legs, she managed to let herself into their apartment. Thankfully, her and Kyo-kun had gone grocery shopping yesterday so there was enough there to make something easy. 
Just the thought of eating made her stomach yowl in protest. 
She set up two boiling pots of water, one for rice, the other for the potatoes. 
She mustered up whatever energy she could to start peeling the potatoes, arms heavy with fatigue. She was really tired. Hopefully Kyo-kun wouldn’t be too disappointed if she tucked in early after dinner. 
She heard the creak of the door. “Tohru?” Oh, so he was home already. 
“Kyo-kun!” she jumped up from the table, apparently too fast as it made her woozy, and tried to run to greet her husband but ended up tripping on the way, strong arms keeping her afloat from under her shoulders. 
“Whoa! Clumsier than usual, huh?”
This would normally be the time when she would defend herself, but her tongue was...stuck. 
Kyo-kun, always so perceptive, cocked his head in concern. “Tohru, are you okay?” he stroked her cheek. “You look pale.”
Say something. “I-I’m fine, Kyo-kun.”
He wasn’t convinced. “You don’t really look fine.” He put a warm hand on her forehead, brow furrowed. “You don’t have a fever..”
She pulled away, careful not to be too abrupt. “I’m fine, really! I just feel a bit faint. Once I get something to eat, I’m sure I’ll be right as rain!”
“What, did you take your lunch break really early today or something?”
She giggled nervously. “Yeah, something like that.”
“What time did you eat?”
She froze, blanching. She was never a very good liar, and with the way he was staring at her now, she knew she wasn’t getting anything past him. 
“Before I left,” she mumbled.
“Huh?”
She cleared her throat. “Last time I ate was...before I left.”
Kyo-kun gave her a steady look. “That was over 11 hours ago.”
She averted her eyes shamefully. His fingers crooked her chin up so they were facing each other. “Tohru, why would you not eat?”
“I-um-” she floundered, “I was in a rush this morning and I completely forgot to pack my lunch and I didn’t realize it until I was already there.”
“There’s a cafe down the street from you. Why didn’t you just order from them?”
“W-well, I-I thought about it but I didn’t really have time to go pick anything up.”
“So have someone else do it. You could’ve called me and I would’ve brought you something.”
She waved her hands. “Well, everyone was really busy and I didn’t wanna bother them and have them make food for me. It’s my own fault I forgot my lunch, not theirs and-”
He groaned, “Tohru, you’re not bothering anyone, that’s literally their job. They get paid to make food for people. Including you.”
She knew that. Of course she knew that. She’d been kicking herself for it all day. “By the time I had time for a break, I was already almost off anyway, so I figured I would just wait til I got home.”
He cupped her cheeks. “You should’ve eaten something sooner, a pack of crackers, anything. You look like you’re about to pass out.”
She jerked away. “I’m fine, really!” And then she swayed and soon enough she was in the air, tossed over her husband's shoulder like a sack. 
“Wh-what are you doing?”
“What does it look like?” he asked nonchalantly, not even grunting with the effort of carrying her at all, which she vowed to file away for future use. “I’m taking my wife to bed.” Almost married for a year now and she still felt a tingle in her chest when he called her that.
“What?! But- but dinner!-”
“I’ll finish it.” And then he gently tossed her on their bed. “Last thing we need is for you to pass out while cooking.”
She wanted to argue, to protest, but the longer she sat, the more the energy left her. And all that was left...was shame. Shame at herself for not eating over something so silly, shame that Kyo-kun had to come home from a long day just to worry about her...Her throat got choked up and she felt her eyes go misty.
“Tohru?” He asked softly. He was always so kind, so much kinder than she ever deserved. Long fingers fanned her cheeks, wiping away the tears at the corner of her eyes and he was kneeling in front of her now at eye level. “Why are you crying?”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’m always being stupid and making you worry about me.”
“You’re not stupid and if I don’t worry about you, then who will?” She didn’t have much of an answer to that. “I’m not mad at you,” he sighed out, “And I don’t mind taking care of you. If you don’t want me to worry, then you should be better at taking care of yourself once in a while.”
She sniffed, nodding. “Right. I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologizing.” He grabbed something out of his pocket. “Here.” 
She scrunched her eyebrow at the wrapped snack. “A granola bar?”
“You need something in your system before dinner. It’s not much, but it’s better than nothing.”
He was always so rational. She smiled softly. “Thank you.”
He hummed in response, pushing her hair back to kiss her forehead. “I’ll come get you when dinner’s ready. Just sit here and relax for a bit.”
And then he was gone. 
She obediently opened her granola bar, chewing in slow, careful bites. She really would have to be more careful, wouldn’t she? It wasn’t like Kyo-kun could trail her around to make sure she wasn’t hurting. She smiled at that visual image. Cute. 
She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, sinking into the mattress, slowly getting through her granola. 
“Oi,” she got a light bonk on the head and she jolted. 
“Oh, Kyo-kun! You’re back already?”
He raised an eyebrow and then burst into chuckles. 
“What?”
“I’ve never seen someone space out while eating a granola bar.” he stroked her hair. “You’re really adorable sometimes.”
She blushed and he just laughed some more and she felt her breath leave her a bit. He really was beautiful, wasn’t he?
“C’mon, come eat with me. I’ve missed you.” She knew he meant it. Kyo-kun didn’t just say things to butter her up. Before she could respond though, she was being hoisted from under her knees into the air. 
She squeaked in surprise and wrapped her arms instinctively around his neck. “Kyo-kun, I can walk on my own,” she protested weakly. 
He shrugged, smirking. “It’s more fun this way.”
He started walking out, effortlessly. Did she weigh anything to him at all?
“Nah, you’re pretty light.” he responded, and she stiffened as she realized she said that out loud. 
“Am I?” She’d always thought she was pretty average sized. 
“I’ve held kittens heavier than you,” he drawled. 
She pouted, huffing, “Now you’re just bullying me.”
He snorted. “You love it though, don’t you?”
Well, two could play at that game. “Of course!” she chirped innocently, “I love everything about you.” And then she kissed his jawline sweetly and watched with delight as his cheeks turned pink and his grip slackened enough that she could slide down to the floor gently. 
She saw the spread on the table and clapped her hands together. “Wow, Kyo-kun! It looks so good!” Then she grinned at him. “You’re so amazing!” 
His face almost matched his hair now. “It’s not a big deal,” he mumbled, “It’s just dinner.”
They’ve known each other for almost half a decade now and he still got so bashful over the smallest things. 
She threaded her fingers through his. “Thank you.”
The shy smile he gave her made it all worth it. 
“Hey, Tohru?” he asked as she sat down to eat. She looked up at him curiously. “Please don’t do this to yourself again. Just call next time. You’re never a bother. Not to me.”
Of course she knew that. It had been clear to her for a long time, but it didn't stop her eyes from getting watery. Her traitorous brain still sometimes told her she wasn't worth it, and here he was to tell her otherwise. She wondered if she'd ever get used to it. 
"Oi, don't get all weepy on me now," he scolded gently. "You need to eat." 
She rubbed her eyes. "Right." 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It’d been over two weeks since that incident and she’d been extra diligent to make sure she brought her lunch with her every day.
Kyo-kun had said she could call him if she needed to, but she still wanted to avoid doing that if she could. 
She felt the rumble of her stomach. She had finished with wiping the counters, cleaning the windows, and organizing the snack areas. She should ask Kaori-san for a break soon…
"Hey, Tohru-kun," oh! And there she was! "There's a super hot guy over there checking you out! I know you're married so you want me to send him away?" 
She scrunched her brow. Super hot…? She looked where Kaori-san was pointing and her eyes widened at the familiar copper hair. 
"Kyo-kun!" She gasped. 
"Wait, you know him?" But she was already running from behind the counter, only vaguely registering Kaori-san calling her. 
She only had eyes for the man in front of her, still in his gi and looking so effortlessly handsome. 
"Kyo-kun!" She grabbed his sleeve.
He smiled at her. "Oh, hey. That was quick." 
"Wh-what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the dojo?" 
"I'm on lunch. I wanted to see you. Have you taken your break yet?" 
"Uhh, no, I was just about to…"
"Take it now." He nodded towards the counter where Kaori-san was watching them with rapt attention. "That's your supervisor?" 
"Yes."
"Want me to tell her?" The woman in question narrowed her eyes. 
"No, that's okay!" She waved her hands. "I've gotten a lot done already so I'm sure she won't mind! I can..ask her." 
"Alright, I'll wait here then." 
His eyes lingered on her as she carefully made her way behind the counter to grab her lunch. 
"Sorry for the short notice, Kaori-san, but I wanted to take my break now if you don't mind." 
"Just a minute, Tohru-kun," Kaori-san stopped her in her tracks. And then she lowered her voice. "Who is that guy?" 
"Eh? He's my husband!" 
"Him?" Then she put her chin in her hands. "Wow, no wonder you're always talking about him. You hit the jackpot, didn’t you?" 
Tohru felt something warm in her chest and she whispered fondly, "Yeah, I did." 
"Does he have a twin by any chance? Brother, sister, it doesn't matter to me." 
"Sorry, Kaori-san," she said sheepishly, "he's one of a kind." And he’s mine, a tiny, possessive part of her brain whispered. "I'm going on break now so I'll see you later." 
And she left before Kaori-san could give a proper response. In the past, she would be worried about coming off rude and she would probably apologize later, but she had a wonderful husband waiting for her and he was first priority. 
And as they walked out hand in hand, she was reminded not for the first time and certainly not the last, how blessed she was to have him.
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myglogic · 3 years
Text
Priceless | Bang Chan | 01
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Chapter 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
Pairing: Bang Chan (Stray Kids) x female reader
Genre: Crime, enemies to friends to lovers, angst, fluff
Short summary: Y/N is a journalist who dreams of writing a frontpage article at the Seoul Times. She gets the chance to attend the Bang Charity Gala through her work where she plans exposing Kevin Bang, father of Chan and one of the richest men in Seoul. How is she planning to do that? The Gala is a masquarade ball where no one will recognize her. Y/N just wants justice for herself and everyone Kevin Bang hurt.
DISCLAIMER: Everything in this fanfic is fiction - that includes Chan’s fictional father who of course does not represent Chan’s real father! ♥
The event was full of people. Full of filthy rich people, you might add. It was the event of the year for Seoul’s richest and most famous people. The Bang Gala. What is the Bang Gala, you might ask? It was a charity gala where tons of money was gathered for a good cause every year. The cause is always kept a secret until the gala. Last year the money went to an organization that helps orphans who didn’t get adopted to adjust to society. Sounds like a beautiful event, right? In one year, the money went to survivors of natural catastrophes, another year it went to the homeless. Each year millions of dollars were donated. You couldn’t even imagine how big the sums must be.
Bullshit. That was what you thought. Because the people behind this charity gala were the Bang family. Kevin Bang, the owner of Seoul’s biggest real estate agency, no, you could even say the owner of South Korea’s biggest real estate agency hosted the gala. In the media, he was known for being a generous businessman, always leaving huge tips at the restaurants he was eating at. He was not only known for being generous, but also being down to earth too.
All of it was an act. Because you knew who the real Kevin Bang was. You knew how the real, evil, Kevin Bang was like and how he treated the people around him too. He was the reason why your father lost everything.
You were just a kid when all of that happened. You didn’t like to dwell on the past but you were a girl who hated unfair treatment. The past was the past but it wasn’t easy to forget. In the past two years you have been working for a pretty big newspaper – the Seoul Times. Okay, working would be an overstatement. You were basically there to proofread the articles written by the real authors and bring coffee. But you were still happy to be there because it was a start. You studied journalism but had no experience yet so it was even a miracle that you got a job at such a renowned company. Sometimes you did write small articles but mostly it was about boring stuff, for example, how the private school next door opened their new library which was – what a coincidence – sponsored by none other than Kevin Bang.
Your parents were proud of you because you worked your ass off at university for this degree. It was very underwhelming to get such an underpaid job, but you had to work hard to become the head editor one day. Right now, you worked at the “celebrity” department, where they basically gathered all kind of news about any kind of celebrity. Like for example how BTS got another win for their latest album. It wasn’t what you envisioned. Sometimes you switched departments too and just work wherever you were needed. That is why you needed an incredible story to write, a story that you have discovered. You didn’t only write articles but sometimes you had to investigate too, like doing interviews outside the office if the writer himself was too lazy to do it. But this story was your personal story. No help from Seoul Times or any other editor. You knew that this story, your story, would secure you a job on the top. That story was exposing Kevin Bang.
Exposing the real Kevin Bang. Not the beloved charitable, kind person that everyone looked up to, but the asshole, getting-anything-he-wants Kevin Bang. Why was your hatred for him so deep when everyone seemed to love that guy? The answer was simple. If something didn’t fit into Mr. Bang’s plans then he just bought everything with his money and influence. He was one of the reasons why an orphanage was demolished because he wanted to free some space for his clients, so he built a 5-star hotel on that area. According to your research he made some hefty payments to make sure that this does not reach the media. It hurt you a lot because you volunteered a lot at that specific orphanage. The kids there were not prepared to leave at all. It was a shitty move of him and you hated him more for that.
But that was just one of his many wrongdoings. You hated reading anything about that guy and his family.
♥.
Chaos. The office was very chaotic because of the on-going charity gala. A lot of newspapers used the gala to get interviews with big names, because anyone who had influence attended that gala. But this year’s theme was not optimal to get a lot of interviews: Masquerade. Everyone had to wear masks so no one knew who you were.
It was interesting since all of the people there already had two faces. The theme made a lot of interviewers back out because if you can’t see the celebrity, interviewing them would be difficult.
You were sitting at your desk, trying to find more dirt on the Bang family when you heard a stack of papers landing next to you, making you flinch a little. It was your supervisor, Hana, who looked at you, annoyed. “Proofread these, okay?”, she sighed, rubbing her temples.
“Okay.”, you said, not wanting to annoy her more.
“I need these by tomorrow by the way.”, she added arrogantly.
“Excuse me, what?!”, you said, standing up in shock. “I can’t even get half of those done in a day!”
She stared you down with an angry expression. “Okay, then why don’t you go and try to interview some masked celebrities at that stupid gala, huh? Our top interviewers don’t want to go because they think it’s a waste of their time!”
You sighed. “Just because you have problems, doesn’t mean that you can put all the workload onto me.”
“I am sick of you complaining, Y/N. This gala is stressing me enough already. It’s not like anything happens at these galas anyway, I don’t even know why we have to send so many employees there. The big boss is crazy. Taejoon doesn’t want to go and we have to send someone from our department.”, Hana said angrily, clearly angry at Taejoon who usually does the interviews for your department.
Then an idea popped into your mind. “Wait… So technically if Taejoon goes to that gala thing, doesn’t he get a free pass?”
“Yeah, we cannot identify the celebs there anyway. But we still have to send ten of our people so that they can write down how much money was donated, where the money goes to, blah blah. Also, if anyone decides to show up without a mask, interview them. Stuff like that.”
This was the idea! You gathered information on Kevin Bang for a while now and if you could find a way to get in there, you might be able to turn everyone against him. You just needed to get the attention of the guests and the media. You knew that you wouldn’t get the recognition you wanted but it would be a start to dig the dirt on him.
Maybe, if you tell the boss that it was you who exposed him, he will let you write the big front-page article about him. Nobody knew more shit about Kevin Bang than you.
“You know, if you let someone else proofread these articles, I would go to that gala instead of Taejoon.”, you offered her.
She gave you a tempting look. “You never went, right? Of course, you would be excited to enter such an exclusive event. But please don’t fall asleep, it gets boring pretty quickly.”, Hana warned you. “Also, you can’t wear a mask as someone from the media. You need to stay in the background, especially since you are still a rookie. Got it?”
Yeah, of course, it was because it was an exclusive event. It’s not like you had a huge ass plan to destroy Kevin Bang or something. “Yeah, got it. Can I go?”, you asked innocently.
She sighed. “Okay. But don’t do anything stupid!”
“I won’t!”
‘At least not when you are around.’, you thought.
Now that you got your free pass to the Bang charity gala, you needed to make up a plan. A really good one. Because your operation was big and you couldn’t risk making any mistakes. The gala was in two days and you quickly needed to figure out what to do and how to do it.
♥.
With all the information you had on Kevin Bang, you knew you had to somehow get the attention of the audience that would attend the gala. Through some insider information you found out that there will be a huge projector. It’s projecting at the main stage. So, you somehow needed to get to the tech room to show the audience your evidence.
You found out that a friend of yours, Felix, will be working there on the night of the gala as a waiter for drinks. You were sure that he would be a huge help and approached him but at first, he thought you were crazy. You were basically trying to ruin a charity event. But after explaining why you wanted to do it, he agreed to help you with your plan. There was a designated area for the press, so you needed to get inside and change first to mix with the actual guests.
This was your plan:
1.    Get inside the actual building as someone from the press
2.    Bring a sexy dress and a mask
3.    With the help of Felix get in the employee area to change
4.    Act as if you’re a guest and talk negatively about Kevin Bang
5.    Get in the computer room to “hack” the projector
6.    Expose Kevin Bang
Sometimes you felt like one of those drama Youtube channels. But this was more than just telling everyone about a horrible person. You did this for your family, especially for your dad. Your family was ruined because of him. Your parents worked their hardest just so you could go to university. Of course, you also did this to write an article about him and get a better position at work. But there was more of a personal agenda behind this.
After a long day of work, you finally came home, clearly exhausted. The gala was tomorrow and you were really nervous about everything. Your roommate Jisung walked out of the kitchen and looked at you. Jisung and you met on your first day of university and became friends quickly. He was your closest friend and you knew you could trust him with your life. “Hey, I got a huge ass dress delivery for you today? What are you going to do with such a fancy dress?”, he asked you curiously.
You smiled at him, determined. “I will attend the Bang charity gala tomorrow.”
Jisung’s eyes widened. “What? For real? Because of your job or what?”
You smirked. “Just wait. After tomorrow, I will finally get the recognition I deserve. And yeah, I will get in thanks to my job.”
Jisung looked at you suspiciously as he sat down with a bowl of chips in front of you. “You're planning something, aren’t you?”
You put on a confident smile as you laid down on the couch. “Yeah. Look, I will tell you everything after the gala. It’s a huge thing so…”
“Don’t get arrested or something, dude.”, Jisung sighed. “Well, since you won’t tell me now, why don’t we watch a movie on Netflix then?”
“Sure.”
♥.
The day of the gala arrived quickly and you found yourself with a camera hanging onto your neck in front of the huge ass gala building. You gave your dress to Felix before so he could hide it in the employee changing rooms. Your hands were sweaty as you took some pictures.
“So, we will be at different locations throughout the building. Try to get some good pictures and if you recognize someone, try to get an interview, okay?”, one of the interviewers told the Seoul Times journalists.
As you went to your designated areas you looked around for Felix to get out of here. At the same time, you admired the huge building with a rich history. Literally, rich. The guests were coming in slowly and everyone looked glamorous and fancy. Their dresses probably cost more than you earn in a month. The location was beautifully decorated, the main stage was huge. While looking around you saw the tech people going upstairs. The tech room must have been upstairs. You couldn’t find a good floor plan on the internet and security was high alert. There had to be a way to get up there. Dressing up as someone from the tech crew would be too obvious but no one would suspect a masked woman in a dress. Especially since you were masked, you were even safer.
As everyone was seated Kevin Bang entered the main stage shortly after. His crisp suit looked expensive, his hair was slicked back. His face was half covered by a black mask. Behind him was his wife, probably number 6 by now, and his son Chan. They also wore masks that didn’t do a good job with covering their faces. Your gaze wandered more towards to his son than Kevin himself. He looked handsome, you couldn’t deny that, with his black hair and dark blue, perfectly sitting suit. You also noticed that he didn’t look too excited to stand there. Interesting.
“Welcome to the annual Bang charity gala! I am happy to see so many faces – well, technically I can’t see you but I appreciate every single one of you!”, Kevin said enthusiastically which earned him hearty laughs from the audience. You rolled your eyes. “You for sure have been wondering where the money goes to this year! This year, we are donating the money of this beautiful gala to a brand-new hospital! With the money you donate every year we can build a completely new hospital where everyone can be treated! The best thing about the hospital?”, he started and showed a picture of the future hospital that was projected behind him. “We will get the best doctors! Anything for our residents of Seoul!”
The crowd cheered and clapped politely. The rich were delighted. “Let’s see how much money we can gather tonight!”
You scoffed at his stupid smirk. “What a freaking liar, the money doesn’t even arrive there.”, you whispered angrily.
The event kicked off, classical music was playing in the background. Since the theme was “masquerade” the guests started waltzing in pairs. It did look very appealing but it felt like this wasn’t your world. In fact, this was not your world. You sometimes wished it was. Not worrying about anything, especially money. You knew you could never fit in.
You then got up looking around. Security was everywhere. Then you spotted Felix who walked up to you. “Hey, sorry, I’m late. These rich people never stop drinking.”, he sighed, clearly exhausted as he pushed his blonde hair back.
“It’s fine the event just started. How can I get out of here without security noticing?”, you asked him, feeling the fear inside you coming up.
“Just walk next to me. As long as you don’t act suspiciously nothing will happen.”, he assured you and walked you to the employee changing rooms. You noticed a few glances from some security guards but nobody stopped you.
As you were getting dressed, Felix spoke up. He was hiding behind some lockers so you could dress in peace. “But Y/N… what if you get caught? How do you plan on getting out of here after doing that stunt?”
You sighed, “I need to do everything step by step, Felix. First, I need to get to the tech room and make sure that everyone out there can here hear me. Then I will decide what to do. But I won’t get caught.”, you told Felix while putting on your red dress that had lace details on the top part. It wasn’t tight but still looked really nice. It was a rather flowy dress and you could breathe in that dress. It looked expensive enough for the elite of Seoul. Good thing that you can rent dresses. You then put on some red lipstick and put your mask on that covered nearly your entire face except for your lips. You were unrecognizable, especially since you looked like a zombie normally.
As you turned the corner to meet Felix his eyes widened for a moment. “Wow, you look nice! I bet you will fit in without any problems!”
You smiled at him and then squeezed his cheek. “Aww! Thank you, Felix. I’m really nervous… but I have to do this.”
He looked at you with a worried expression, “Please, be careful, alright?”
You nodded and quietly exited the dressing room. Some people sat at their assigned seats, others were talking about the event. The music was loud but the atmosphere was alright. For now.
You decided to join a group who were talking. They were two women who were gushing about how extravagant this gala was. They were wearing expensive designer dresses.
“I love the gold details in the decoration.”, one of the women, the one who wore a black mask, said.
“I wish they would serve some more seafood. The buffet is horrible.”, the other one said, sighing. Wow.
“But no matter what Mr. Bang does, his galas are still the best!”, black mask spoke up again.
“I don’t get why everyone likes him so much…”, you spoke up, taking a glass of champagne from a waiter that was walking by.
The women looked at you, a look of confusion in their eyes. “Why would you say that? Everyone loves him.”, black mask said, defending the man.
You sighed. “I heard that he's a real asshole in reality. Ever heard of when he bulldozed an orphanage for his new hotel?”, you told them.
They gasped in shock. “He would never do something like that, would he?”
“Well he paid the media so word couldn’t get out.”, you told them.
Then they started discussing if this was real or not. That was what you did for the first hour. While there was some show on the stage, you trash talked Kevin Bang. While some people didn’t even listen to you, others were saying that they had assumptions about him. Kevin Bang was a smart man. He wouldn’t show his real face to anyone.
As you were looking around the room, you felt something or rather someone staring at you. Now that you think of it, you felt that even earlier. Then you saw that in fact someone was staring at you. That suit and mask… He looked really familiar. He walked up to you and held out his hand. “Would you like to dance with me?”
You were surprised and didn’t know what to do. “Uh, I’m not really a dancer.”
“Just follow my lead, you will be fine.”, his butter smooth voice assured you. Damn it.
You then took his hand and followed him to the dance floor. He put one hand on your waist and his other hand held yours. You wondered why he asked you out of all people. You carefully followed his steps, trying not to embarrass yourself.
“So, what’s your deal? Who are you?”, he grumbled, his eyes dark.
“This is a masquerade, isn’t it? Why would you ask me that?”, you told him, slightly surprised by his sudden change of attitude. What was he trying to do?
“I heard you talk shit about my father. What the hell are you even doing here if you hate him that much, huh?”
Your eyes widened. Of course, he was Kevin Bang’s son! You recognized him from earlier. “Why do you act like everyone in this room loves him? As if I am the only person who dislikes him.”
He tightly squeezed your hand and waist to symbolize his seriousness. “Oh, really? You don’t know him. He is a businessman, sometimes he has to make sacrifices like relocating an orphanage.”
So, he was listening to you. Interesting. “You call that relocating? You don’t know shit.”, you said in an annoyed tone.
“And you know that better than his own son?”
It was your turn to give him a tight squeeze on his shoulder. “Yeah, I actually have my sources.”
You were dancing in circles and his gaze bore into yours. You would find it cute that he tried to defend his father if he wasn’t Kevin’s son. “I will find out who the hell you are. I bet you are one of the Lee’s. You guys are always jealous of us.”
You sighed. “I am so jealous of you and your life. Oh, fuck off. You know, I don’t have to like you or your father. And here I thought I would dance with a gentleman.”, you said, trying to sound disinterested.
The music finally came to an end and you looked at the man in front of you. “It was not nice to dance with you. Let’s not do that again.”, you said and turned your back, walking away from him.
“Wait! Who the hell are you?”, Chan shouted, gaining a few looks from the crowd. But before he could follow you, you were lost in the crowd.
You tried to go through busy crowds and then tried to find a way to go to the computer/tech room. You decided that it would be best if you pretended to search for a bathroom or something, so you sneaked upstairs without anyone noticing you for now.
It was time. Time to get revenge. Time to show the world who the real Kevin Bang was. Time to shine.
A/N: Hello guys, this is my first (consistent) series on this blog! This is also the first time I am writing for Chan and I hope I do him justice. Buckle up because this story has a lot of twists and turns. I appreciate every form of feedback and maybe even theories! What do you think will happen next? Thanks for reading! ♥
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Worthy, pt 1 & 2
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I stopped and stared up at the building in front of me. Imposing, huge, and a beacon for anyone concerned with clean energy. I had won the internship at Stark Industries research and development division by working my ass off all year, coming up with innovative and exciting ways to utilize the arc reactor technology. I’d been interviewed by Mr. Stark himself when it came time to award the position. I’d never been so excited to work in an unpaid position in my life. It was made all the better by being in New York City. And even more awesome because accommodation was provided in the tower. Even if the internship didn’t lead to permanent employment at Stark Industries after my sojourn there, it would be a resume jackpot. 
I stopped at the main security desk and picked up my passcard. Elizabeth Carmichael. It sounded much more glamourous than Ella did, but I’d never been called Elizabeth in my entire life. Always Ella, except from my Nan, who called me Bethy. I clipped the tag on my blouse and headed to the elevator. The email from the HR department had been clear: pick up your passcard, and report to the main office of R&D on the 55th floor. I pressed the button and waited for the elevator to close. A hand reached in to stop the door and Mr. Stark stepped in. He smiled, like he would to anyone he shared the elevator with, and then his eyes narrowed as he read my nametag.
“Ms. Carmichael! You’ve made it to the city then? Where are your bags? Are you not staying on site?” He spoke so fast I could barely follow him.
“My flight arrived late last night. I thought I would stay at a hotel overnight and then get organized to move into my room, sir.” I felt breathless just trying to keep up with his speech, and rushed through my own explanation.
“We’ll send someone to collect your things. We’re having a little social in the lounge tonight; you don’t want to miss it. Good networking opportunities. There are three of you that earned internships. Pepper was particularly excited about you. Not a lot of women in STEM, you know. So we’re having a meet and greet for the three of you. Mostly Stark staff, but there'll be some others in attendance. Angela will get you organized.” There was even information stored in the nuances of how he spoke. It was going to be overwhelming until I got used to it. If I got the chance to get used to it. This elevator interaction might be the last time I saw Mr. Stark for the rest of the summer. The elevator doors opened, and I stepped out into the bright, clean research and development administrative office. I waited at the desk while the woman sitting there was on a call. Her nameplate said Angela, so I suspected she was who Mr. Stark said would organize me.
“Ella, right?” She swivelled her chair to face me. I nodded. “I’ve already contacted the concierge at your hotel to have your belongings sent over. I’ll show you to your rooms at the end of your orientation and tour. Then you can get settled.”
“I won’t be working?” I was surprised.
“Not today. Today is all about the Stark Industries machine and how you fit into it. So orientation to the labs, meet some of the people you’ll be working under, settling into your suite and figuring out your way around. There’s a meet and greet tonight.” She typed something into her computer and then rose. Without waiting for me, she headed off down a hallway. “This is the administrative floor for Research and Development. R&D takes twenty floors here, from 55 to 75. Starting at the 76th floor, the Avengers Tower begins, and you’ll only end up there if Mr. Stark wants to meet with you. Well, and for the mixer tonight. The 56th and 57th floors are all housing. Our guest scientists are housed on 56 and your suite is on 57. The project you’ve been assigned to is an offshoot of the household arc reactor project, and will allow you to work on one of your proposals. That division is on 60 through 65. Your direct supervisor is Markus Reid.” I scrambled to scribble notes and keep up with her and she led me through a maze of hallways and offices. We finally came to a halt and I was so busy scratching notes into my notebook that I bumped into her.
“Oh, god. Sorry,” I apologized. She smiled and shook her head.
“Relax, Ella. You were the top candidate. Your proposals rocked Mr. Stark and Ms. Potts' socks off. You belong here,” she reassured me. “And I’m going to email all this info to you, so you can put away your notebook.”
“Thanks. I’m feeling a bit small right now,” I admitted.
“The first few days are very overwhelming for every Stark Industries employee. It’s why we schedule nothing work-related on the first day.” She knocked on a door and hesitated just a second before opening it. “I have Elizabeth Carmichael here to sign some paperwork.” She led me into the office, and sat in a chair near the door after pointing to a chair at the desk. Another woman smiled and dropped a sheaf of paper in front of me.
“The bottom half of that is the paperwork for you that explains everything in the top half. But this is a basic non-disclosure agreement. The second one is the follow up to the initial waiver you signed when you applied for the internship, giving proprietary rights to Stark Industries, while maintaining your intellectual property, authorship and development rights. That basically means if what you’re working on goes into production, it will be a Stark Industries product, but you will be credited as the inventor. There’s some tax paperwork and a release for your university.” The woman handed me a pen. I looked up at her while I tried to process everything she’d explained.
“Tax paperwork?”
“For your pay.”
“Oh, I’m here for the internship. I’m not paid.” I thought that would be clear to an HR person.
“No, Mr. Stark pays his interns. It makes the transition when you are hired easier,” she explained.
“What?”
“Did you not read your acceptance package?” She gave me a look that suggested she thought I might be stupid.
“I did. It suggested that if Stark Industries was happy with my performance, I could be offered an extension at the end of the internship, provided my degree was complete.” At least, that’s what I’d understood from reading it.
“And you’ve already provided transcripts showing you’ve finished both your bachelor’s and master’s degrees. There were only three internships offered, Ms. Carmichael. We complete all your paperwork now with the assumption that you will be staying on at Stark Industries. If you’ve passed our rigorous application process, we feel you are a keeper. If you choose not to stay, it will be because you chose not to stay,” She explained. I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. I knew the internship was prestigious, but I didn’t realize exactly how incredible it was.
“Oh. Well. In that case,” I said and scratched my signature across the papers in front of me. She offered her hand. I stood and shook it.
“Welcome to Stark Industries, Ms. Carmichael.”
XXX
The rest of the day passed in a blur. Angela assured me that her email would include maps, and secret notes and tidbits that would help me remember everything, but I was so floored from the words of the HR person that I really couldn’t focus. Angela led me to the commissary for lunch and ordered for both of us. I didn’t even realize until she handed me a tray with food on it.
“Are you going to be okay?” She asked. I gave my head a little shake to snap back to reality and smiled in apology.
“Sorry. I’m feeling even more overwhelmed than I was when I got out of the cab this morning,” I laughed. She took a seat at a table and nodded for me to sit across from her.
“You should give yourself some credit. You earned your place here. Pepper is really excited about having you. I suspect you’ll be the poster child for gender equality at Stark Industries for some time to come. As soon as you won that internship, your place here was secured. Probably for life,” she grinned. I shook my head.
“What if I’m a dud?”
“You aren’t though. Mr. Stark himself thoroughly vetted your application, and Pepper went through your references with a fine tooth comb. She even tracked down extra references. You deserve this more than anyone who’s ever applied before, Ella.”
“I feel like I might be sick,” I groaned. It was her turn to shake her head.
“It’s first day jitters. Once you’ve settled into a routine and have your nose into all that sciencey stuff you do, it’ll all blow over,” She laughed. I didn’t want to pick a fight so I just focussed on my lunch.
XXX
My suite was ridiculous. I’d understood we’d be provided with a room. In my mind, I had thought dormitory style, like at university. I was quickly learning Tony Stark did nothing by halves. I had a suite. First of all, the whole thing was fully furnished. The master bedroom had the biggest bed I’d ever seen in it, and an ensuite bathroom with a shower bigger than my last dorm room. There was a second bedroom, I’m not sure why. Plus an office, an open floor plan living room and kitchen and a main bathroom. There was a storage closet that I’m pretty sure could have kept a small family comfortable. And a deck with a view of the city. I opened the fridge and discovered it had been fully stocked already. I grabbed a bottle of water and stood at the counter, the overwhelming feeling of just too much washing across me again. There was a bound book on the counter, and when I flipped through it, I realized it was a Stark Tower lifestyle guide, with information about the pool, the gym, the on-site movie theatre, the commissary, and on and on. There was a tablet on the wall that allowed you to order in take-away or groceries. Housekeeping was once a week. I pinched myself to make sure it wasn’t a dream, fully expecting to awaken back in the dorm room at the university. But I didn’t.
I unpacked my bags and checked my email for the details on the get together. Casual evening wear. What was that, even? I grabbed my phone and texted Angela. Whether she liked it or not, she was my new bestie. 
“What does casual evening wear mean?”
“Nothing too fancy. Knee length dress is more appropriate than floor length.”
“I’ve been in university for the last nine years. I have nothing even remotely appropriate.”
“I’m on it. I’ll meet you in the lobby.”
XXX
“I’m sorry, Angela, I just didn’t know who else to ask.” I felt like all I was doing was apologizing to her. She laughed.
“You’re my assignment for the next few weeks. And you are so much nicer than the last new hire I was paired with. I can see actually wanting to spend time with you,” she laughed.
“Really? You’re my personal person?” I arched an eyebrow. She laughed again.
“Something like that. Human Resources likes to pair someone from admin to new hires as an orientation guide. It’s a pretty awesome job, to be honest. I get to meet most of the new people on their way in the door. Make lots of new friends. Meet lots of cute science nerd guys.” She winked. I laughed.
“And yet you don’t mind being assigned me. I must be very special indeed,” I teased.
“You’re little lost puppy eyes sucked me right in,” she giggled. “Come on, let’s get you a dress.” It felt like she dragged me all over town, but the truth was, we didn’t go far, and we only visited a couple of stores. I tried on everything she brought to me, and let her tell me what looked best. I was most comfortable in jeans, a t-shirt and a lab coat, so I trusted her judgement. We were a whirlwind of activity after picking the dress. She steered me over to a shoe store, and then a make-up store. I didn’t even realize there was such a thing as a make-up store. I only kept mascara in my bathroom because my eyelashes were so light you couldn’t see them without a bit of mascara on them. 
When we finally got back to the building, I wanted nothing more than to take a nap. Angela shooed me into the shower and ordered us some dinner instead. She helped me with my hair and then sat me down to eat.
“Do you wear contacts ever?” She asked. I pushed my glasses up my nose and shook my head.
“No, they don’t make contacts for eyes like mine,” I admitted.
“Okay. I can work with that,” she looked at me thoughtfully and chewed on her pizza. Before I knew it, she was rearranging my hair, and applying make-up and amazingly, although I’d honestly never thought I’d enjoy the fuss that went along with dressing up, I did enjoy myself. It helped that Angela kept a running commentary of exclamations about how pretty I was, and how nice my eyes were. I never had thought there was anything particularly special about my brown hair and brown eyes. I changed my mind when Angela let me look in the mirror. My hair was loose and wavy, and cascaded over my shoulders. The red dress she’d found for me highlighted that my hair was more than one shade of brown, and brought out the natural glow in my cheeks. My eyes, despite being framed behind my glasses, looked big and sparkly.
“Wow.”
“You’ll have half the R&D guys begging for your number by the end of the night!” Angela laughed. I blushed.
“I don’t know about that,” I protested. She laughed again.
“Come on. I’ll be your wingman.” She linked arms with me and led me out the door and to the elevator. XXX
The crushing feeling of inadequacy hit me again as the elevator opened up to let us out into the cocktail party. I hesitated at the gap between the elevator and the large, noisy room. Angela gave me a gentle nudge, but I froze, taking in the panorama in front of me. Almost every scientist I’d ever quoted in any of my research was standing in that room, mingling with one another. When Tony Stark isn’t the biggest name in a room, it can make you pause. I’m pretty sure I recognized the most recent recipient of the Nobel Prize in physics standing by the bar. And Dr. Banner was lingering near the door to the patio and pool deck, looking exceptionally uncomfortable. At least he was near an exit where he could cool off and relax if he needed to. His research was what drove me into the sciences. In the end, I decided gamma radiation wasn’t really the area I was passionate about, and pursued research that put me in Stark’s path. But he was still kinda my hero. 
“If you don’t step off this elevator right now, I’m going to push you off, and then you’ll draw a lot more attention to yourself than if you act like a normal person.” Angela had my number already. I stepped into the party tentatively. Angela steered me straight to the bar. “Let’s get a drink into you, loosen you up a little. These people have all been where you are, Ella. What’s your poison?”
“Vodka, rocks.” My eyes were glued to the room, and I just kept recognizing more and more people. Surely they all didn’t work for Stark Industries. I would have noticed that at some point during my application process. Mr. Stark and Ms. Potts saw me as Angela handed me my drink. Ms. Potts smiled in welcome and headed straight to me. I didn’t have time to panic.
“Ms. Carmichael! I’m so pleased to see you. You look a bit like a canary in a room of cats. Don’t. They’re all harmless. And some of them are very excited to discuss your proposals with you,” she took my hand and squeezed it familiarly. It was not at all like my boss was shaking my hand, but more like a friend greeting me.
“It’s nice to see you again, Ms. Potts.” I managed, and took a sip from my glass. 
“Please, Pepper is fine. We’ll reserve the formality for press releases,” she smiled. “Are you settling into your rooms?”
“I am. They’re much more than I was expecting. Everything about this internship is more than I was expecting,” I blurted. I was nervous enough that I took a perhaps-larger-than-it-should-have-been swallow from my glass and nearly choked.
“We’re so pleased you accepted, Ms. Carmichael,” Pepper gushed. “Really. I’m sure Angela has filled you in about the women in STEM initiative Stark Industries is backing.”
“If I’m going to call you Pepper, you’re going to have to call me Ella. Angela mentioned a little about it, but I didn’t realize there was an entire initiative.” The combination of vodka and talking shop with Pepper was starting to ease my nerves, and I could feel the tension starting to melt from my shoulders.
“We’re starting summer and weekend science and technology camps for girls. I’m hoping you’ll be able to find some time to work with me on promoting them. I think Angela has scheduled a meeting for us sometime in the next few days,” she explained. 
“That would be really cool.” I took another sip. There wasn’t much left in my glass. I was going to need to slow down. Mr. Stark was watching the crowd, but I could tell that his head was in our conversation.
“I hope you’ll come out of your shell a little, Ms. Carmichael. You were vibrant during the interview process. I hope that wasn’t a one-off. It’ll be hard to sell STEM as cool with a mousy science nerd girl as the PR star.” He was suddenly back in the conversation full force. I flushed.
“Tony! It’s first-day nerves. We can’t all be the shiniest constellation in the sky all the time,” Pepper scolded him. “Don’t pay attention to him, Ella. Parties bring out the worst of his quirks.” The way she said it, I could almost see the air-quotes hanging in the air around the word quirks. I smiled.
“I promise you, Mr. Stark. I can be just as shiny as you need me to be when surrounded by young women. It’s when I’m in the presence of the likes of Dr. Banner and Dr. McCoy that I tend to get star-struck. And I think, did I see Reed Richards?” I found my voice. Mr. Stark smiled.
“Since we’re all making friends, you may as well call me Tony,” he allowed. “I make sure my best and brightest get a chance to meet the best and brightest.”
“As much as I appreciate the opportunity, it’s just a little overwhelming.” I felt it was only fair to be honest with them, since they were my employers. Pepper squeezed my hand again.
“I have no doubt, after speaking to your references, that you will be everything that we are looking for, Ella,” she reassured me. I took another sip from my glass, and Tony suddenly noticed it in my hand.
“Please tell me that’s not water. We have a strict no water at parties rule here at Stark Industries.” Mr. Stark took my glass away and finished what was left. He coughed and handed it back. “Oh, I think you’re going to fit in here quite well, Mouse.” Angela took the glass from me and got a fresh one from the bar. I reminded myself to go slow. There was no point in getting drunk in front of such an auspicious crowd on my first day.
Angela led me around to a number of people I would be working with, including my direct supervisor, Markus Reid. He shook my hand with enthusiasm and launched into a long-winded explanation of my project and how it would fit in with his project. I found myself lingering with him for longer than was probably necessary. He was passionate about his work with the arc reactor technology and he reminded me of my thesis supervisor, ready to help and happy to share whatever advances he had discovered. It was the lynchpin in making me settle for the evening. If my supervisor was excited to have me, no one else really mattered. Angela’s face lit up and she excused me from the conversation. 
“Shut up. You are not going to believe this. I have someone to introduce to you!” She exclaimed. I followed her as she led me across the lounge and toward the windows overlooking the outside deck. I couldn’t figure out who she wanted me to meet, but the last person who’d been near where we were headed was Dr. Banner, and I was sure she’d seen him earlier. She slowed to a more dignified walk and led me to Dr. Banner. He was chatting with a petite brunette who looked familiar, but I couldn’t quite place her. Dr. Banner looked up and acknowledged Angela as he finished what he was saying to the other woman.
“Angela, you always walk with such purpose.” His tone was warm, and he gripped her hand with both of his. It was obvious from Angela’s relaxed posture that they’d worked with each other a few times.
“Comes with the job. This is Elizabeth Carmichael, one of the new interns here at Stark,” she introduced me. “Ella, this is Bruce Banner.” She paused and turned toward the woman. “And if I’m not mistaken, this is Dr. Jane Foster?”  Dr. Banner shook my hand and nodded toward Dr. Foster.
“So pleased to meet you, Dr. Banner. It was your work that led me into the sciences.” I tried not to gush. I don’t think I was successful.
“Really? My understanding was that physics and engineering were your specialties,” he asked. My heart nearly stopped. He knew my areas of study. My science geek girl idol knew my specialties.
“I got really into green energy during my undergrad studies, and my focus switched,” I admitted.
“And my accident had nothing to do with that?” He raised an eyebrow. I laughed and realized that might not have been the best response. I bit back my smile and shook my head.
“Actually, no. Your accident happened when I was in first year, and I stuck with my studies as a minor. It was when it was time to begin my master’s that I felt I could do more good, with my level of knowledge, if I pursued green energy,” I explained. He looked thoughtful.
“And once again, Bruce, I point out that your accident has significantly less effect on the opinions of others than you think,” Dr. Foster jumped in, and offered her hand. I shook it. “Such a pleasure to meet you, Ella. Tony has been beside himself with excitement about your thesis. I think the other two interns might be getting the short end of the stick.”
“Except that there is no short end of the stick at Stark,” Banner argued. Dr. Foster laughed and nodded.
“It’s so true. I wish these internships had existed when I was struggling for funding.” she looked past my shoulder, distracted. I turned and followed her gaze until it lit on the most beautiful man I think I’d ever seen. He was tall, and blond, and broad, with a big smile and an equally large laugh. And from the way Dr. Foster was looking at him, I realized he must be Thor. “I didn’t realize he was going to be here.” The smile fell from her face.
“I’m sorry, Jane, I had no idea. Why would he be here? He’s not one of you sciencey types,” Angela apologized. Dr. Foster turned to me and shook my hand again.
“It was truly lovely to meet you, Ella. I look forward to watching your project. If you ever need anything, Angela can get you in touch with me. Even if it’s just a woman-to-woman bitchfest. We STEM ladies need to stick together.” She excused herself and made her way quickly to the elevator. Angela and I watched her as the elevator doors closed. I was disappointed, but turned back to Dr. Banner. He opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by Thor stepping up to us.
“Banner, my friend! It has been too long since we’ve met. You look well!” Everything about Thor was big. He pulled Dr. Banner into one of those one-armed-man-hugs, his massive arms straining against the confines of his t-shirt. He towered over both of us. He released Dr. Banner and turned to Angela and I. If I looked anything like Angela did, I was gawking like a slack-jawed idiot. I nudged her gently and she closed her mouth.
“Ladies, it is well to make your acquaintance. I am Thor, of Asgard,” he introduced, taking my hand and kissing my knuckles. I raised an eyebrow and glanced at Angela.
“Ella Carmichael.” I couldn’t form any other words. There was just so much of him, and it was so close. I was completely star-struck in a way I’d never been about a fellow scientist. He took Angela’s hand.
“Angela Benett,” she breathed. I was so glad I wasn’t the only one on the verge of swooning. The man was truly a specimen. Banner cleared his throat, and I snapped my attention back over to the man who had arguably been the first crush of my science geeky heart.
“What brings you here, Thor?” he asked. Thor turned back to him and smiled his ridiculous, large, beautiful smile.
“I had need to speak to Tony. I’d not realized it was a celebration, or I would have come tomorrow. Twas not urgent,” he explained. “And I am afraid I have chased Jane from her colleagues.” There was regret in his tone. Things were obviously over with them, not merely bumpy or awkward. 
“He said twas,” I whispered to Angela. She stifled a giggle. I’m not sure why it was so amusing, other than that I had finished my second vodka. I’m not sure what her excuse was; I knew she hadn’t been drinking. “I hope we’ll get a chance to talk more about what you’re studying now, Dr. Banner.” I had to excuse myself before I made an idiot of myself in front of Dr. Banner and Thor. Angela followed me to the deck. I stretched out on a deck chair and looked up at the sky. Stark Tower was so high that it seemed to be above the smog of the city. There was still loads of light pollution, but I was reassured that the stars were the same in New York City as they were at home in Washington. We sat quietly for a few minutes.
“Thanks for being my sidekick, Angela,” I sighed. “I don’t know if I’d have made it through the afternoon, let alone this evening, without your assistance.”
“Well, like I said, it’s my job. But paycheque aside, you’re alright, Ella,” she chuckled.
“I’m glad you think so. I don’t know if I can afford Stark wages to keep you as a friend.” Across the deck something caught my eye, and I slipped off my shoes to walk over to it. Angela must have seen it too because she followed curiously. It was the biggest damn hammer I’ve ever seen in my life, just sitting on a low table beside the pool. It was fancy, tooled with knotwork. I ran my hand over it. I wasn’t sure what it was made of. It had the warm feel of vibranium, but it almost seemed to hum under my hand. I slid my hand up the leather wrapped handle. The grip was comfortable. I squeezed the handle, and felt the give of the leather wrap against my hand.
“I don’t know if you should be playing with that, Ella,” Angela warned.
“What do you suppose it is? It feels like it’s got more of a purpose than just a giant paperweight, or decoration,” I thought out loud, flexing my fingers along the handle. It felt like it needed to be held. I might not be describing that properly, but it was almost like it spoke to me. Which clearly suggested I’d had too much to drink.
“I haven’t seen it before, but I don’t get up into this part of the tower much. Is it heavy? Maybe it’s a prop or a prototype or some sort,” Angela shrugged. I adjusted my grip on the handle and prepared myself to lift it, assuming it would be ridiculously heavy. I was surprised when after a slight tug of resistance, I was able to heft the thing in the air. The air around us crackled with static, and suddenly a shock ran through my body, from the hand that was holding the hammer through to my feet.  Everything around me slowed down, almost like slow motion in the movies. I looked up at Angela and saw Thor and Dr. Banner running towards us over her shoulder. Thor was reaching out, his mouth forming some kind of words, but I couldn’t hear them. I felt the hammer tug out of my hand and it flew away from me. The electricity left my body and I collapsed on the pool deck.
“What the actual fuck?” I muttered before blackness overtook my thoughts.
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Dig a Grave to Dig Out a Ghost - Chapter 18
Original Title: 挖坟挖出鬼
Genres: Drama, Horror, Mystery, Supernatural, Yaoi
This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.
Chapter Index
Chapter 18 - Memories
Lin Yan was afraid that the professor was going to run away. When the event was over, he didn't even take the time to change his clothes. He called over to little Daoist priest to tell him he could leave first, then rushed to the backstage lounge. The crowd trying to leave completely blocked the exit. Lin Yan wasn't able to get out for a while. Behind him was a swarm of school reporters, sweating profusely as they followed.
"Excuse me! Coming through!" He wasn't sure whose foot he stepped on in his rush, but the girl in front of him turned around and gave him a sharp look.
"Lin Yan!" a clear voice rang out. Lin Yan looked up and saw Weiwei standing at the door with a red staff badge hanging around her neck.
Lin Yan didn't care anymore about feeling embarrassed while he hurried through the crowd without any organized manner. He shouted at Weiwei: "Can you do me a favour? This is urgent!"
"It's my birthday next week, come over for dinner!" Weiwei shouted on her tiptoes.
"Okay, whatever, help stop the crowd behind me!"
Lin Yan ran as fast as he could straight down the corridor, stumbling from time to time over the hem of his clothes. When he burst into the backstage VIP room completely dishevelled, he realized that he had been worried for nothing. The professor hadn't planned on sneaking away at all. He was seated on the sofa and had waited for him, sipping his tea.
"You came? Sit down."
Lin Yan clutched his chest and nodded, breathing too heavily to speak.
The lounge was decorated in a very stylish way, with arc-shaped floor-to-ceiling French windows, beige wallpaper, and light brown soft leather sofas that looked like they were worth a lot of money. The school had always been willing to spend money on entertaining guests. The professor poured a glass of water for Lin Yan and pointed to the single-seater sofa opposite of him.
"You're Lin Yan, who came to us for an internship before, right? You performed well today. You've got guts and have a good mind." The professor pondered for a moment: "I thought you'd come find me sooner or later. I didn't expect that you would get back here so soon. "
"Do you know me?" A series of questions popped up in his mind. Lin Yan suppressed the urge to outright address his issue. He apologized for the outburst just then, and then said seriously: "I did here for that internship. This is very important to me, please tell me everything you know."
The professor nodded slightly: "I can probably guess what happened. So, I'll speak slowly. Listen carefully. If there's any useful information, I'll tell you." He sighed and looked out the window. He spoke softly: "The fact that you are still standing here in good shape is already much better than the person who came before you."
Lin Yan looked back at Xiao Yu, who was holding his hand tightly, standing ignorantly.
The floor-to-ceiling windows were facing the path outside the auditorium. The students must use this path to get to the dormitories. In the night, boys and girls walked down it together in large groups. I don’t know who yelled: "The river flows eastward, the stars in the sky look to the Big Dipper!*" The professor smiled, turned his face to Lin Yan, and recalled: "I was about the same age as you when I first entered the tomb. It was a good time to be young."
*(Song lyrics from "Hao Han Ge" by Liu Huan)
"Young people don't know what's important. . ."
The professor spoke very coherently, as if he had been wanted to say all this for many years. Lin Yan even felt that he was using this as an opportunity to reminisce about his nostalgic youth. But when the professor painted the scene back to Lin Yan, it sent a chill down Lin Yan's spine.
Twenty-five years ago, a group of coal miners in Jinxiang County accidentally collapsed a mineshaft while they were hacking away. They removed some jade plates and funerary wooden figurines from inside the hole, which turned out to be the entrance tunnel of an underground tomb. Once the county head official learned about this tomb, he blocked off the mausoleum and reported the news to the central government. At that time, China was still a novice in both archaeological technology and cultural relic preservation, and it was still difficult to excavate many imperial tombs. Therefore, this cultural Ming Dynasty tomb was handed over to the university, and a team of several master's students hired some local volunteers and rushed to Jinxiang.
This group of people included the professor and Lin Yan’s current supervisor. When preparing the materials for the tomb, the professor and Lin Yan both found some strange information. He strangely discovered that whether it were the county chronicles, the local chronicles, or genealogical records, there was no record of the tomb's owner. One of the workers on the team claimed to be a master of fengshui. After seeing the mausoleum, he said that it would be impossible to excavate. The earth's meridians formed a breeding ground for negative energy. The evil spirits attracted to the space were too dense to bury people. The owner of the tomb wouldn't be able to find peace after death. Not to mention the misfortune it would bring future generations. However, most of the students were young and energetic. They were eager to try after seeing the exquisitely carved jade artifacts. Without much consideration, they went directly to the tomb with tools and equipment.
"Strange events started after that." The professor adjusted his glasses and grimaced: "We should have listened to the warnings, but we didn't believe in evil at the time."
First, the four chickens brought to ward off evil spirits died overnight. When the underground tomb gate was opened, the scaffold collapsed, and an 18-year-old fell and broke his right hand. Everyone thought it was an accident, but from the time they entered the tomb, all those involved in the excavation had nightmares whenever they closed their eyes. Every night they dreamed that they were dying to the point that no one dared try to sleep anymore. Fatigue and constant fear made everyone’s fighting spirit die off after only a week.
"What happened after that?" Lin Yan looked back at Xiao Yu in surprise. He thought he had been tormented thoroughly by him, but he hadn't even seen half of this ghost's ferociousness yet.
"After entering the main chamber, we found many valuable cultural relics beside the coffin, but they were poorly preserved. We could only brush off the embroideries. Watching the treasures that we brought out so easily blacken and carbonize the moment the sunlight hit them was the fatal blow to our spirits. I cried miserably, but everyone was equally depressed and even fearful. No one had the energy to comfort me."
The professor's hand shifted on the windowpane, leaving behind a damp handprint. "There seemed to be some kind of energy in that tomb that could make people fall into despair. We worked hard and sang to make ourselves feel more brave, but it was still useless. A rural volunteer girl went crazy on the ninth morning and smashed her husband's head in with a machete while everyone could only stand in shock."
"Blood sprayed all over the bricks on the top of the tomb, and it was dripping everywhere. The woman put her husband's head in front of the blank memorial plaque, kowtowed three times, and sat on the ground convulsing, laughing eerily, while laughing and shouting a name." The professor looked at Lin Yan and asked, "Do you know what name it was?"
Lin Yan took a dazed step back. He wanted to break away from the hand holding his, but Xiao Yu held it tighter, not giving him a chance to escape.
"It was Xiao Yu. Who exactly is Xiao Yu? I searched through both the official and unofficial records, but I couldn't find any record that mentioned this name." The professor's expression became painful: "We gave the woman a consolation fee to settle the matter. After she took the money, she laughed for a while before she raised her machete and slashed it down across her neck. The blood was sprayed onto the memorial plaque. When she fell, only a thin piece of skin kept her head attached to her body. At that time, people didn't know much about archaeology. At first glance, some of the students were okay, but the hired volunteers were all scared away, saying that we dug up the grave of the dead, and this was retribution for it."
"The last person who left was the fengshui guy. He told me that the tomb had no fengshui. The owner of the tomb had died violently. Nothing could approach the tomb through the evil energy breeding ground. This resentment built up over a long time. The woman's body had been filled with too much Yin energy and she was the first to fall prey to the ghost."
"The man left. The students didn't want to go, but they were still having nightmares every time they. They tried to stick it out for a week before packing their bags and returning to school. No one else died. The first time the lead took over, he wouldn't even touch the coffin. It was a disappointment for everyone."
Lin Yan imagined the beheading. His face grew pale, and his stomach felt sick.
"Are you alright? You don't look well." The professor seemed to catch on to the younger's expression, and pointed to Lin Yan's cup: "Drink some water. Take a break then you can listen some more."
Lin Yan shook his head and asked, "Was it really like the fengshui master said?"
The professor hesitated for a while, and his fingers scribbled across a section of thin vapor he exhaled onto the glass. Two words appeared on the glass: "Xiao Yu." As if he didn't want to see it, the professor wiped it away and shook his head: "I have seen a lot of weird things throughout my career. The demon and ghost theory is not unfounded, but I think that the tomb might be some kind of spiritual formation. In ancient times, emperors and generals did everything they could to prevent their bodies from being destroyed. Many strange arts and techniques also emerged. It is possible that the woman was already delirious and so was the first to lose her mind in the consuming and the gloomy atmosphere in the tomb."
Lin Yan imagined the shadowy chamber with two headless bodies lying on the ground. He could barely squeeze out a wry smile: "What does this whole thing have to do with me?"
"I'm getting to that part." The professor sadly lowered his head: "Young people have never been willing to admit defeat. Since then, I've been very interested in the history of the Ming Dynasty Chenghua period. At first, I wanted to find out the identity of the tomb owner but I really fell in love with the history, and, 20 years later, I became an expert in the field. But long-term research in any field will encounter roadblocks. I was troubled by problem for nearly two months, and finally decided to go to the Ming Tomb again."
Lin Yan asked puzzledly: "Are you not afraid something will happen again?"
The professor shrugged: "No way, the large amount of untouched cultural relics inside was too tempting. The team left before anyone had even touched the coffin the last time I was there. I've never gotten over it."
"Be considerate of the obsessions of an old man who has been involved in academia for most of his life." The professor said: "When the newspaper published the news about the excavation of the Ming Tomb again, a message came from my secretary saying that someone was willing to help me. He understood fengshui. If something went wrong, I could turn to him."
"I'm not the same young man who spent a whole year studying about the tomb. I ran all over the country all day and night. I was too busy to take care of it, so I asked the secretary to keep in touch with him."
"Later on, something did happened. It was exactly the same as before. After entering the tomb door, everyone was inexplicably depressed and paranoid, and soon began to have nightmares. I was so afraid that the tragedy would happen again, so I had to ask the person who knew fengshui for help. He told me that I need to find a person who shares the same horoscope as the evil creature in order to make it stop. Then he gave me a birth date and said that he could find someone with the same birth date horoscope."
Lin Yan had already guessed the answer. He pointed at himself and hesitated to confirm: "Me?"
The professor nodded: "That birth year made me think of a student. I asked your supervisor. He said that he had a friend’s son who was looking for an internship, and his own student, Lin Yan. It was just an extreme coincident that your birthday fell onto the right date."
"You know what happened after that." The professor looked at the path outside the window. The students were almost all gone now. The moonlight didn't reach the path, instead only reflecting the black shadows of the trees that were swaying back and forth in the night breeze. "If you want to ask me who the owner of the tomb is, I can only tell you that I don't know. It's shameful; after more than 20 years, I have revisited this topic year after year, but I still haven't made any progress."
"If you have anything else to ask, please go ahead. As soon as you say the name 'Xiao Yu', I knew it was you. You've got a lot of guts to throw my things like that." The professor laughed, "I was just like that when I was young. I had trouble with authority back then. It took a lot to keep up with me."
Lin Yan hurriedly lowered his head and apologized. He kept thinking that it was this File Folder dragged him into this mess, but it didn't seem like he did it intentionally. . . How much did he know about what happened after? Thinking of this, Lin Yan raised his head and asked, "Don't you want to hear how I know Xiao Yu's name?"
The professor waved his hand and relaxed his expression: "People my age don't want to listen to these ghost and monster stories. It's bad luck. I know you're fine when I see you standing here. I didn't discuss it with you. I blame myself for not discussing this with you sooner. I'll try my best to explain anything you need, but the rest. . ." The professor said, spreading his hands, expressing that there was nothing he could do.
During their talk, the professor's personal secretary came in and urged him to leave, saying that the car was ready and the school officials were all waiting downstairs. The professor nodded to the secretary, turned around and asked Lin Yan, "Is there anything else you want to know?"
Lin Yan felt stuck. The most renowned Ming historians in China had no answers. Did he really have no choice but to wait out the three months, waiting for this ghost to remember his life experience and tell him his wish. But what he couldn't remember? Would Lin Yan be forced to accompany him for eternity as a ghost?
As he pondered, a thought popped up, like a small copper hammer hitting the glass with a crisp sound. Lin Yan stopped the professor who was packing up and asked: "You. . . you mentioned that the fengshui guy had mentioned a horoscope date. I happened to be looking for an internship at that time, so it all worked out, right?" Lin Yan's voice was trembling with excitement: "This is too much of a coincidence. It's almost like he was waiting for me. . . Where is he now? How did he know something would happen in the Ming Tomb?"
The professor suddenly stopped, frowning and thought it over: "You're right to be suspicious. At that time, I was busy planning the excavation and didn't care much about it. . ." The secretary who was waiting at the door shouted: " Xiao Liu, do you remember that fortune teller? Give me his contact information."
The young girl flipped through the folder in her arms, and replied: "That person never contacted me directly. He had been passing messages through a young guy who was new to the team. I'll look into it for you. I'll get back to you about in in the next few days."
The professor's face sank, and just like Lin Yan, he had no answer. He whispered to him: "It'll should be easy to track him down." He patted Lin Yan on the shoulder: "I'll help you out with this, don't worry. "He took out a pen and left Lin Yan's his phone number, and the corner of his mouth ticked up: "I still owe you your prize. I'll give it to you the next time we meet."
When he left, the crowd was gone. The corridor was empty. The old custodian didn’t even turn on the ceiling light to save electricity. Only the wall lamp glowed a dull yellow. Lin Yan’s face drained of all colour. He suddenly felt like he was in a horror movie. He was the lead actor stumbling along the wall in a terrifying corridor.
The professor's story made him feel incredibly afraid. Behind him was a ghost, a murderer who put people to death in a cruel and bloody way. He didn't even dare to look behind him. He was afraid that when he turned around, a ghost covered in bloodstains would be there, grinning sinisterly at him through a veil of long hair, saying: It's your turn.
Lin Yan's breathing became heavier and heavier. When he couldn't resist the urge to run away, he was suddenly pushed harshly against the wall. His body was wrenched around. Lin Yan raised his head and squeezed his eyes shut.
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kinetic-elaboration · 2 years
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November 19: Week In Review
This week took so much out of me lol, I don’t even know. It went by faster than anticipated, which I think is good, but it also means that I am ill-prepared for my days off. I don’t feel like I’m actually on vacation now?
B has been inhaling Shirley Jackson and texting me his reactions and thoughts at literally all hours, so we’ve been talking even more than we usually do. (Now that he’s done with both books I sent him that will probably drop off... which is a bit of a bummer tbh.) That’s kept me somewhat on my toes.
Monday was a fairly normal day... I was working remotely, mostly reading, staff meeting. Wrote some lists.
Tuesday, I went into work, and afterwards I went on a Pharmacy Adventure. Part of switching pharmacies was to make it more convenient to pick up my prescriptions and it’s kinda working... but idk, man, this was a whole to-do. First, because it was dark already, I decided to ride up to the end of the line and then go back around, so I’d do less walking, and also only have to cross the street once since I don’t trust that intersection at all even in daylight. But there were some people at the back of the bus who were...kinda on the edge of a fight? I could feel the tension among them--it was a group of friends and one guy who wasn’t too keen on them, and this guy who wasn’t keen was getting a little scary.
Anyway, they all got off at the end of the line and then we turned around to head the other way. The bus wasn’t announcing the stops for some reason and it is PITCH FUCKING BLACK at literally 5:30 PM so I couldn’t see jack shit. So I just kinda guessed which stop and I STILL don’t know if I picked the right one. End game, though, was me walking around the outlets very quickly losing all sense of direction. I (ironically) flew too close to the sun--I thought I could figure out where a store I’ve been meaning to visit was, but between looking for it and getting distracted by the large Christmas ornaments, I got all turned around and then I just had to straight up guess where to go. Awful. I found the pharmacy finally, and got the prescriptions, and also a scented candle that I will /probably/ gift to a co-worker for the holiday gift exchange.
Then I decided to get a coffee at Starbucks as a reward since it’s literally on the way home, and I saw a racoon! Or some kinda animal.
Mom and I were going to have a “quick” phone call about grocery shopping for Thanksgiving, which of course was not actually short, it was 2 hours long.
Wednesday was also long because I had to actually do said shopping after work. It was pretty exhausting. I did get a ride home, though, which helped a lot, and for dinner I had a sandwich and some chips that were left over from a law school event, so at least I didn’t have to Suffer for not cooking on Tuesday.
Thursday I woke up late because I’d been having weird/anxiety dreams, and I spent the whoooooole day reading for work. Didn’t have a department meeting even to break it up because my supervisor was out sick (booster shot side effects). I did cook in the evening, but I took my sweet time getting to it. So, subsequently, I did not get much sleep.
Today was Friday but lacked any sort of Friday energy. I had a lot of random tasks to do, and I did most of them, but I still feel... unsatisfied, like I’m missing something. Like I did something wrong. Probably just my sleep-deprived brain screaming for a break lol. Toward the end of the day, my co-worker’s wife and son did show up (major Friday event) but I was already about 10 minutes from walking out the door. So, not a huge distraction.
After work, I planned to get a coffee and pastry and sit outside (it’s... cold but not that cold, lol, I’m tough) and maybe write down some thoughts on the SGAU, try to get into that again. But then I ran into the new reference librarian, D, and we decided to sit outside together and talk. It was really nice! I told her about how CW used to look pre-pandemic and some tips for the staff gift exchange. We talked about everything being on an app, and different laundry set ups, and college. Random stuff.
I took the bus home so I could talk to BL a little, which was nice, and then I finally got home at 6:30. But since then I have truly been... almost too tired to function. I think this is a Classic Introverted Response to events. Like, the existence of events. People. Things out of the ordinary, or out of the routine. My whole self is just going into hibernation mode, like, nope, we Shall Not do anything until the battery is recharged with solitude and quiet.
I wish I could just vegetate tomorrow but I HAVE to go the farmer’s market to get stuff for Thanksgiving. While I’m out, I think I’ll grab a(nother) coffee and actually do some writing-on-writing. Hopefully. The inertia on this project is uh... bad lol.
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