#i am in fact extremely unwell

[aishitara]

hey. how we doin fam? everybody got their emotional support whiskey? box of tissues? flashbacks from the queer/cas-baiting-leading-up-to-the-spn-finale PTSD? yeah?

#i am not okay #i am in fact extremely unwell #fucking sick to my stomach actually #this is all fine #the winchesters #spnwin #mine

[waitineedaname]

actually I'm not done thinking about teru and ritsu's friendship. I think teru might be one of ritsu's first real friends. ritsu isn't like,, the most social kid in the universe, and I think he has plenty of superficial friends (see: "I talk about the weather with pretty much anyone") but I think the only real close friends he has are teru and shou. and I think it's bc both of them are people he met without his Perfectly Ordinary Middle Schooler mask. he has to fill the role of honor student, perfect son, doting brother, etc. all the time while ALSO trying to blend into the background and be inconspicuous, and that's part of why he lashed out like he did during the cleanup arc, but with teru and shou, his first encounter with both of them involved him being an arrogant little shit that's willing to pick fights, which contradicts the perfect kid act AND the perfectly ordinary middle schooler act, and is in fact much more honest bc he's not hiding this kind of nasty side to himself. and that honesty works out for him with these two! teru sees himself in ritsu because he's also kind of an arrogant little prick, and aside from initially trying (and succeeding) to intimidate him, teru looks out for him and risks his life trying to save him and they genuinely get along pretty well! and with shou, he sees that ritsu is willing to fight him on his own and he's like "oh you're fucking nuts, we need to be best friends now" and immediately respects him a lot just because he's not gonna run away from a fight he's certain to lose. idk, I just think it's important that ritsu's first real friends are ones who saw him in rather ugly circumstances and wanted to be friends with him anyway

#mp100 #ritsu kageyama #I have. BRAIN WORMS. #if this seems extremely rambling it's bc I was forming these ideas as I wrote #idk I just think a lot about the bit with tokugawa where he's like ''I'm just a perfectly ordinary middle schooler'' #and tokugawa says ''yeah those don't exist'' #I feel like we acknowledge the fact that he had to fill the honor student/perfect son role a lot #but he ALSO had to try and blend into the background (which tokugawa attributes to him acting like his brother) #and I think an important part of his development is acknowledging these negative parts of his personality #like. he can be arrogant! and aggressive! and kind of a shithead! #but he's also a loyal friend and very brave and such a good brother #such a theme of this series (especially the final arc) is about being honest with and about yourself #and accepting both your flaws and the good parts of yourself #and I think it's important that teru and shou saw him at these low points for him #also!! I'm thinking about his fight with shou #and how there was no way he was gonna win against him but he fought him anyway #and then how that's repeated when he fights shimzaki to buy shou time #idk. he's a brave kid. #I am literally always thinking about ritsu. help me. I am unwell.

[cicidraws]

im not well.

#i typed a whole thing out and yall are exhausted enough treating my art blog like a diary im sure. writing physically hurts. #and im already alone on adaily basis enough i wouldnt lie about the fact im glad if someone sees me - not for attention #but to know im alive. im relaly just by myself. #but im really not well and im trying so hard to stay out of hte hospital bc i cant afford it neither can my dad and i have no income #barely can afford half the groceries we have or rent. #im just really not okay right now. im not. im not going to sugarcoat that. im eXTREMELY unwell. #i will not be having a mental health check bc that happened before and the cops made fun of me horrifically and belittled me #and i will not be going to hte hsopital. unless i end up actually doing something #but i am so fighitngdoing something always im just so tired i really am so tired. #i dont wanna do this anymore or be here anymore i really dont #if you hear me out thank you but blacklist my tag #shutupcici - #im sorry fro making this art blog horrible to deal with or me to deal with by making this my diary at this point #im gonna try to stop that but its hard being alone.i really am #negative // #sui //

[tom-whore-dleston]

I’m frustrated because I really really want to write but I just feel like life just keeps picking something to throw in my face and it prevents me from doing the one thing I love doing 😥

Like I wanna write so I can cope with my shit but I’m just so fuckin sad and overwhelmed I wanna disappear and cry ugh

#unwell thoughts with jordan #i would never wish this kinda pain on anyone #I feel like life has been throwing curveballs at me ever since my bday if I’m being completely honest #i mean I am aware of all of the extremely good things that happened since my bday #but it doesn’t change the fact that I feel like shit and I wanna hide from the world l

[hoshieeyewrinkles]

D o c t o r p a r k

Pairing: Doctor! Jay x Bimbo! Reader

Genre: smut

W.c: 2.5k

| Requested | Not proofread |

Tw warning: extreme humiliation, heavy degradation, anal sex, spanking, fingering, shoe humping, umm reader is put into a wedgie, Jay fingered her belly button 😭, Filth.

"I'm feeling a bit dizzy, Mr. Kim," you lamented, trying to evoke a sense of concern from your professor, who simply looked at you with skepticism. "I'm a bit concerned Miss.Y/n because you haven't been feeling well for the past few weeks. Maybe you should take the day off and ask your friends for notes." Your professor suggested the idea, and you reluctantly agreed, secretly rolling your eyes. In reality, you didn't actually have any dizziness or headaches. You just wanted an excuse to escape class and visit the nurse's office in hopes of catching a glimpse of the incredibly attractive Doctor Park, also known as Doctor Jay.

You have been on his tail since the past weeks, wanting to get into his pants than anything else. Though your plans have gone unsuccessful as he merely shrugged you off crushing your hopes in an instant. He was extremely stern and focused on his work. The university you were studying in was a prestigious one with strict protocols hiring the best lecturers, the best staff and the hottest doctor.

He was everything you ever wanted. He was smart, young, well-built and probably had a big dick too given by his attitude. Oh how you wished to feel his strong arms around your neck, keeping you in a chokehold.

There you were once again, waiting for him to notice you, in his office. With his white coat dangling by his chair, he was glancing through his phone. His well-fitting black shirt revealed his biceps, and he had his hair pulled back, his trousers ironed and his leather shoes lightly tapping the floor. You wished the floor was you instead. You were relieved that his nurse had taken a lunch break, but you found her annoying because of her privilege to always be around doctor Jay.

"Oh Miss.Y/n you again?" He questioned blankly, though the 'again' seemed a little emphasised. "Yes, doctor Park, I am feeling a little unwell." You responded in a soft tone, your voice coming across as seductive, as you had intended. Jay raised an eyebrow and slightly shook his head, his gaze drawn to your choice of outfit. A white mini skirt paired with a baby blue tube top. You were dressed in very little as usual, and his gaze was drawn to your sparkling headband and red nails, which would look stunning wrapped around his fat cock. He was fully aware of your intentions, but he could not afford to give in to them just yet.

"Miss.Y/n, you have come here three times this week. You already have a prescription from me for headache medication. Despite the fact that you showed no symptoms, you previously claimed to have a fever. What symptoms do you have now? Would you mind informing me, hm?" He inquired in the most casual tone. His tone already has your pussy throbbing. He was overconfident and a stuck-up asshole in the sexiest way possible.

"I feel some pain here, doctor." You said that, and then you moved over to the hospital bed and laid down next to his chair without asking. With a silent exhale, he looked up at you. Your top was dropping to expose your cleavage, and your skirt was perilously riding up to expose your soft mid-thighs.

"Where does it hurt, Miss Y/n?" He questioned unfazed, despite the fact that his mind was racing. You pouted slightly at his unaffected demeanour, your pink glossy lips tempting him to bite them. He was annoyed by the way you fluttered your eyes at him, acting as if you knew nothing about anything. It made him so angry that he wanted to rip off your pathetic excuse for clothes and rail you to the end. The thoughts which went through his mind every time he saw you would have him fired from the university, have his licence suspended.

"Here..." You pointed directly at your crotch, expecting him to be either flustered or disgusted. To your surprise, he smirked. "I understand what you are doing, Y/n," he said, shaking his head and dropping the honorific. He did not let you respond when he spoke again. "I must say, it is funny."

"What do you mean, doctor?" You asked innocently, but your heart raced as you wondered what he was thinking. "Nothing, are you sure your litte princess parts doesn't hurt because of taking the whole football team?" He questioned and your jaw dropped. He let out a snort at your expression "What? Am I lying?" His smirk widens when your face starts to turn red, burning in humiliation.

"Does your skirt length correspond to your level of comprehension? You dirty vulgar girl" He asked again degrading you. "Doctor....that's really mean of you! You are slut-shaming and y-you are insulting me." In reply, you stumbled over your words. "I'm not slut shaming you y/n. I'm simply stating out facts which I have heard around and which you have showed around me, how is that offensive, sweetheart?" He questioned amused, his cock twitched in his pants at the sight of your dumb expression. You were nothing but a dumb slut who could barely live her life without a cock. He noticed the way you rubbed your thighs together at the nickname he called you.

"The whole football team—hell, I do not even know their names, they did not sleep with me. Doctor Jay,how can you believe them?" You asked, your bottom lip quivering as you pouted at him. You were not so naive as to miss his taunts, but you were sick enough to take pleasure in the embarrassment he was causing you. Jay laughed because he thought you were cute and there were no rumours that you were sleeping with the whole football team. He made them up himself to see how smart you are, and you were clearly one of the dumbest girls he has ever met. Probably the sluttiest too.

Lucky for you, he loved sluts.

You did not have time to think when he lifted your skirt, revealing your drenched panties, which were stuck to your pussy lips. "I- Doctor Park, what the hell are you doing!" You yelled at him, attempting to push your skirt down, but he held it firmly between his fingers. "Stop pretending, baby; you have been doing this for weeks, trying to seduce me with your pathetic excuse of tops barely holding your saggy tits and these fucking skirts that keep getting shorter, coming to my office almost every day." He paused for a moment licking his lips at the sight of your soaked panties. "Did you enjoy the humiliation I put you through, y/n? it made your pussy throb, yeah?"

You let out a small moan and nodded desperately, letting your fake innocent demeanour slip as you grabbed his hand, which was holding the hem of your skirt and guiding it onto your cunt. "Please, Doctor Park, it hurts."

He chuckled in response, shaking his head slightly. "Well, as your doctor, I must investigate what is going on with you, princess." His eyes were filled with lust. He pushed his morality and principles to the back of his mind. Fuck, he needed your slutty pussy right now. It was the prettiest cunt he would ever see, and he was not going to pass up this opportunity to use you.

He removed his hand from your crotch and opened the drawer in front of him. You watched him with curiosity, desperate to get his fingers, mouth, and cock inside you right away. He shuffled through his belongings before reaching for a pair of white gloves and putting them on. Your eyes widened at his actions.

"Your little nasty pussy does not deserve to be touched by my bare hands." He spoke in a low deep voice earning a whine from you. "Fuck, look at those juices. You are such a shameless whore." You felt your insides twist at his tone change. He was such an unpredictable man with no filter, treating you in the most humiliating ways, which only made you want him more. You would let him do whatever he wanted with you. You were down bad for him.

Without any warning he inserted his gloved finger inside you, it went in so smoothly as you were completely drenched. "Are you enjoying this? How embarassing y/n, is this why you joined this university? To suck cocks? To have your little cunt pounded by everyone?" You didn't reply to any of his questions busy in pleasure be was giving you, letting out small whimpers. He added two more fingers, aggressively fingering you. The wet, gushing sounds filled the room: "Doctor Park... P-please. Want to feel your fingers." You begged, squirming around, getting closer to your high. He ignored your words and lifted your tube top above your stomach, exposing your belly button to him. "Would you like to be fucked there too?" He aggressively pushed his other hand's fingers inside your belly button. You give a squeak at the sensation, moaning like the whore you are.

Your cunt and belly button getting fingered by his thick fingers simultaneously, releasing waves of pleasures inside you. You were thrashing around uncontrollably, overcome with pleasure. "Calm down, slut. I'm just getting started. Turn around." He ordered and you complied feeling a bit disappointed that you didn't get to cum. "but I didn't..." He cut you off harshly after landing a slap on your pussy "Not everything is about you."

He stuck your underwear in a wedgie, and you winced at the burning sensation on your pussy lips. Without warning, he pulled the wedgie and snapped it back, causing you to let out a painful screech. "This is how dirty little girls like you deserve to be treated," he said before snapping the wedgie several more times. You thrashed around, biting your palm to muffle your voice. He eventually stopped his assault on your ass crack and removed your underwear. What further humiliated you was the way he held your underwear with just two fingers treating it like some dirty trash. "Put this drenched shit in your mouth so you'll keep your dumb mouth shut." He threw the underwear in your face, and you did as he said, shoving it inside your mouth. You could taste the sweetness of your juices inside your mouth.

You never knew being treated in such humiliating way would turn you on so much. "Fuck look at this ass" he grunted kneading the flesh in his gloved hands. His cock was about to burst through his trousers. He enjoyed treating you in this manner because that is what dumb little cock sluts like you deserve, constantly seducing people and putting their jobs in risk. You needed to be taught a lesson that would put you in your proper place.

He began spanking your ass harshly until you were numb, your moans muffled by your panties. "This. is. exactly what naughty girls like you deserve." He spat on your asshole making sure it's lubricated enough. "I have no intention of using your nasty pussy but this tight ass deserve to be pounded." He unbuckled his belt throwing it aside and letting his cock stand in all glory. You tried to turn back, to look at his cock but he smacked your ass again "Don't turn back. I don't wanna see your spit covered dirty face." He degraded you before lifting you by the stomach and placing you on your hands and knees.

He pushed his cock into your hole, letting out the most seductive moan that nearly made you cum. "Mhmm..." You let out a muffled moan, and despite the pain, you could not stop pushing back on his cock. He began to pound into you with great speed, his hips slamming into your bruised ass. The pain from the wedgie assault lingered, and him pushing his cock into your whole aggravated it.

"Messy dumb slut." He yanked your hair back, his hips moving with uncontrollable speed. "Fuck, this is what you wanted right? To be fucked by me? To be treated like nothing, you are truly shameful." His words kept pushing you to your edge. Jay bit his lip at your state, your plump ass looked so bruised. Your belly button was red from his assault. He felt all of his stress disappear as he fucked your ass. "Touch yourself for me, baby," he asked, and you began to rub your clit vigorously, feeling your high return, but before you could cum, he pulled out his cock and released himself over your ass. You took out the underwear from your mouth. "Doctor park, I couldn't cum." You whined, panting loudly. He didn't reply, taking his gloves out before disposing them into the trash can nearby.

"And? How is that my problem?" He asked cockily, sitting back in his chair, manspreading, his cock still out. "Doctor park that's not fair!" You yelled in frustration before crawling out of bed, landing on your knees. Jay bit his lip at your sight, you looked so desparate and filthy. "Suck my cock and make yourself cum, angel." He pushed his leather shoe on your clit. You immediately took his cock in your mouth slurping on it messy while grinding on his hoe. "You dirty insatiable girl!" He said chuckling at your messed up state pushing your mouth deeper onto his cock.

You were still grinding hard on his hoe, moaning on his cock and rubbing your covered breast against his leg. Lost in the blissful pleasure he was receiving from your sensual lips, he was letting out soft moans. You were truly like the wettest and the filthiest dream he ever had. You came on his shoe grinding like a whore and he pushed you back before spraying his cum on your top. You both took few minutes to catch your breath before he wore his pants back and glanced at your dumb state. "Get up." He gave the order, and you stumbled to your feet, drenched in sweat, saliva, and cum. "Pick your underwear and clean my shoe."

You obeyed his orders cleaning his shoe with your underwear "Wear them back." You were about to protest, but his one look stopped you, and you wore the dirty, completely drenched panties back. You felt so nasty yet so good. He pulled you onto his lap and pressed his lips against yours. You kissed him back, running your hand through his styled hair, messing it up. He patted your ass, breaking off the kiss. "You can rest on the bed while I bring you something to eat." He said, and you felt the heat rush back into your face as you nodded shyly. You laid back on the bed watching him collect his things. "Remember don't remove the underwear till your day ends, it will be a reminder for you to know what happens to naughty pretentious girls like you."

His words made you whine and nod submissively, "Perhaps I will use your little pussy next time, princess."

#enhypen smut #jay smut #enhypen jay smut #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts #jay x you #jay x reader #kpop smut #dark enhypen

[minty-fanfic-corner]

Not Enough (Tighnari)

..... I wrote something??? I WROTE SOMETHING?? It's a bit different from my other Not Enough fics, but I thought it'd fit too!

Anyway.

I've never talked about it here. I've been living with chronic pain for nine years now, mostly in my knees, but it affect a lot of my joints. I can't get a diagnosis, doctors don't know what is wrong with me and I am tired of being in pain. So what do you do in these cases? You write something to vent (yes, it is kind of a little vent)! Anyway, I might make one with Kaeya later just because .3.

I'm off to take painkillers and try to sleep now!

The Sun was already high in the sky, entering your bedroom through the window’s opened curtains.  Yet, there you were, still lying in bed. You were in bed, but you were far from asleep. In fact. you had woken up during the middle of the night, because of the pain, and you couldn’t fall back asleep. But you couldn’t bring yourself to get out of bed, or even sit up on the soft mattress; everything hurt so much. So there you were, eyes closed, trying to focus on something else.   Soon enough, you heard a knock at the door of your room. Tighnari’s voice was heard, calling out for you: 

“Y/N, we’re leaving soon for today’s patrol! Don’t be late!”

“I’m almost ready Tighnari, don’t worry!” you answered, finally opening your eyes. 

 You slowly sat up, every single muscle and joint in your body protesting. By this point, you were almost late, there was no time for you to eat. It wasn’t as if you were hungry anyway, the pain made it so your appetite was greatly reduced. You threw on your uniform and went outside. Tighnari had already started giving out the instructions for the day, so you joined the group, who was listening to him. By now, he was almost done assigning the route and partners. Hopefully, you didn’t miss your name… 

“And Y/N, you’ll be with me today. We’ll simply check the emergency food supplies around the trails.” 

 Working with Tighnari gave you mixed feelings. On one hand, you knew him well and knew how to act around him so he wouldn’t suspect a thing. On the other hand… He is extremely observant. If you did so much as moving your pinkie finger the wrong way, he’d notice immediately. Thus, hiding your pain from him would require you to play your role perfectly. Well, you weren’t too stressed about it. After all, this is what you had been doing for quite a while now, and no one noticed. You weren’t about to let others know today. And so, the other rangers left to their tasks, and you started following Tighnari to the first emergency food hideout. 

“Are you feeling okay? I didn’t see you come out for breakfast today.” Tighnari asked. 

 You were looking at your feet, but quickly looked up to look at him in the eyes, forcing a small smile on your face. 

“Yes, I’m fine! There’s no need to worry about me, master Tighnari. I just went to bed rather late last night, I slept in.” 

 Tighnari simply nodded at your words. He focused his attention on the trail, careful to avoid roots coming out of the ground. You followed his steps. 

“You know you can always come to me if you’re feeling unwell, right? After all, it is my duty to make sure you are safe.” 

“I know…” 

 You had overestimated your energy, and used it really quickly. Usually, you could go through your tasks without any problems. But today was different. The pain was too much, you had no energy and you felt horribly sick. The world was spinning and you felt lightheaded. As Tighnari was adding food in the hideout, you focused your attention on a bright, blue flower. Breathing in, breathing out. In, out. In, out. In, out… 

“Y/N!” 

 You jumped back as you felt a hand squeezing your shoulder lightly. You turned around quickly. Your eyes met Tighnari’s, he seemed to look at you with a worried expression. 

“Are you okay? I’ve called your name a few times, but you didn’t answer.”

“O-Oh yeah, I’m fine! Don’t worry about me!” you answered with a forced smile.

 You always forced smiles, but this one was painful. The world was spinning faster and faster around you, making you feel sick. The pain was becoming unbearable, you swallowed back tears. Tighnari’s lips moved to say something, yet you heard nothing. None of the words reached your ears, as the ringing became too much. You tried to tell him, once again, that you were fine. But before you could say anything, you felt your legs giving up and everything became black.

You didn’t dream about anything. You were just there floating in a dark sea. But even unconscious, you could feel the pain radiating in your entire body. You wished passing out would have at least stopped the pain for a while… Soon enough, you started to hear faint voices. Someone asking someone else to get them as soon as you’d wake up. The door closing softly as someone left. And a cold cloth being put down gently on your forehead. You didn’t even notice you had a fever. A few more minutes passed, and you were finally able to open your eyes. 

“Collei…?” 

“Ah, Y/N! You’re awake! I’ll go get master Tighnari, he’s super worried about you…!” 

 Before you could protest or anything, the young girl got up and left quickly. A few minutes later, the door opened again, but only Tighnari entered the room. You tried to sit up in bed, but he stopped you quickly, with a hand on your shoulder. 

 “It’d be better if you stayed laying down. You hit your head pretty hard when you went down.” 

“Ah… I’m sorry about that, it won’t happen again…” 

You didn’t dare to look at him. 

“Why didn’t you tell me, Y/N?”

 But his question surprised you. So much so, you snapped your head up to look at him. 

“Tell you what?” you denied. 

“About your pain.” 

“Pain? What pain?” 

“Y/N.” his tone was serious. “You’ve been acting weird for a few weeks now. You don’t have to deny it” 

Some tears started to fall from your eyes as you managed to answer something. 

“Because I’m not weak…” 

Tighnari took a few seconds, simply looking at you. Finally, he sighed and sat down, on the chair next to your bed. 

 “I know you’re not weak Y/N. But you can’t possibly win this battle alone. You know I care about you, right? And I want you to be okay. You can’t keep on going on like that. You’ll only hurt yourself more. Now, let me help you.”

#tighnari #tighnari genshin #genshin #genshin fanfiction #angst to comfort #gender neutral reader #gn reader #tighnari x reader #tighnari x y/n #genshin scenarios #genshin x reader #fanfic blog

[holodeck-enthusiast]

The Night After

...

*after the episode "All Our Yesterdays"*

...

That night, for obvious reasons, Bones found it hard to sleep. Only 3 earth hours left to the beginning of the alpha shift. Bones had already taken a dose of melatonin and it's not working. He refused to fight the thoughts, and was thinking about that another extreme stressful day three of them have had. He embraced the physical and mental pain, something he's actually very good at.

...

Comm chimed, breaking the monotonous humming of the ship's environmental sound.

"Doctor, please accept my apologies for contacting you at this hour. I assume that you were asleep...and this not an emergency...I just.."

Bones noticed the prominent hesitation in Spock's voice. He almost never hesitates. What's got into him again?

"What is it Spock? You feeling unwell?"

"May I come your cabin, Doctor? I need to say something to you and it shouldn't take long"

Bones smiles. "Literally anytime you wish, Spock, you poi.."

He stopped and closed his eyes.

"Yes, of course!".

...

Bones sat up on his bed and commanded the room computer to put on a light. His room is next to Spock's. It took around 45 seconds till Spock came in.

"What is it Spock"

Spock came closer to Bones's bed. Took a small pause before standing straight with his arms behind.

"Doctor, I came here to formally apologise to you for my behaviours in the cave yesterday."

.

Bones let out a sigh of relief. He was genuinely concerned of it's a healthy emergency; Spock's assurance usually means nothing when his own health is concerned.

"You were clearly affected Spock! You weren't yourself"- Bones smiled.

"You were severaly unwell" Spock continued "I used extreme physical force TWICE, especially when, in reality, you were helping me..."

Bones definitely hadn't needed this apology, but he realised Spock needed to let it out. He didn't interrupt.

"... Although my psyche went back in time, which apparently I had no control over, I should have known best to adapt to the situation. I am ashamed that I failed to do that, and I thank you for taking the responsibility."

"Thank you, Spock. But then you should also recall that it is probably because of you I am alive right now..."

Spock maintained eye contact in silence.

"...see, Spock...it is not news to both of us that these strange new worlds always do strange new things to our minds. That's the part of it. I was never eager to join this mission and now I'm in it for this long..my life is here!.."

Bones stopped for a moment and stood up from his bed. He walked to Spock and stood face to face.

"Plus I do think I deserved a slap back there!" He laughed. "I always call you names. Never realised it could've affected you that much. This human characteristic is very, you know, common among friends. I forget the fact that you do not realise how close and unhinged I feel around Jim and you."

"You always are unhinged around everybody, doctor" Spock let out a microscopic smile.

Bones laughed finally. "Go to your bed, you..." Again he closed his mouth. He'd need to practice for god's sake!

"..pointy-eared Vulcan?... probably I do not like it because that's actually incorrect."

Bones went back to his bed tiredly. "How come?"

"Firstly, to my great sorrow, I am only a half-vulcan; secondly and most importantly, my ears have prominent curvatures here, it's not technically a 'point'."

Bones yelled "Dammit Spock! Just go to you cabin and let me die in peace for...what...2 and a half hours!"

"Good night, doctor.' Spock let out another microscopic smile and left the cabin.

...

Both of them slept like babies afterwards.

.

.

.

.

.

#star trek #spock #james t kirk #spirk #star trek tos #tos spirk #jim kirk #leonard nimoy #star trek spirk #mcspirk #mcspock #deforest kelley #doctor mccoy #bones mccoy #dr mccoy #leonard mccoy #leonard bones mccoy #all our yesterdays #star trek original series #star trek fanfiction

[fluffypotatey]

hello fluffypotatey community. i am once again feeling extremely mentally ill over the fact that wukong has never landed a direct hit on mk (or someone who Looks like mk, a la macaque's shapeshifting and ink mk, who he didnt attack after it was weakened and looked like mk)

hello gumy-shark community :)

so, imma just plug @imminent-danger-came's post (lemme know if you'd rather not be tagged btw) showing all the parallels between MK and Wukong bc they have researched this beter than me and oh do i envy T^T

so, let us worsen your illness with parallels of SWK shielding MK, parallels of SWK racing off to MK (this one isn't technically imp's post but she reblogged it and it killed me, sooooooo imp's by proxy????) also this parallel (ehich fucked me up while watching but after lurking through imp's mirror post- i swear it was for research for this ask, i SWEAR-) with Wukong & possessed!Wukong

so, like, taking those in mind......the fact that Wukong is unable to hit MK (even while possessed), the fact that Wukong views MK as someone who can leave the world better than he found it, the fact that Wukong is so protective and cares for MK so much-

fuck man T^T there's no follow up or analysis i'm am simply unwell and need a moment

#finding them all has made me even MORE ill #i blame you gumy #fuck you i'm crying #i am in my uni's library and forcing myself to not cry in public #lmk #sunburst duo #lmk sunburst duo #lmk sun wukong #lmk mk #lmk qi xiaotian #lmk parallels

[solargeist]

Hello I am extremely unwell about your art. I absolutely adore your Grian fanart- in fact it’s what got me back in the fandom.

All your art is a major slay, thank you for sharing it on tumblr.

lolol well hiiiiiiiiii welcome Back i am Also exrtemely unwell abt grian rn

#ask #THANK U. i lvoe being. Slay.

[hotwaterandmilk]

You might have answered this in the past, but how did you get into wedding peach? It was my first anime and it holds a really special place in my heart, but I definitely found it accidentally back in the day on YouTube and I'm curious to know how other fans found it :)

Thanks for the question, going to point form due to being unwell.

First time I learned about Wedding Peach was online as a tween just seeing images of a thing that looked like Sailor Moon but wasn't. (A lot of SM pages around this time featured other magical girl anime and noted "rip-offs" like WP). I was intrigued and looked into it, saw everyone hated it, got even more intrigued lol.

First watched the anime via the Cantonese dub on VHS tapes some nice girls let me borrow at school. (Still a massive fan of the Cantonese OP. Ahhh someone shared the MV!!)

Then watched VHS fansubs which I had to import at great expense, loved it of course. Piecing together the mythology based on out of order episodes I could barely comprehend just endeared it to me even more.

Learned more, felt most websites portrayed the series with few facts, decided to make a website in '98 to provide factual info. Yazawa-sensei messaged me and helped me obtain manga volumes I was missing, was extremely kind and patient, still influences me to this day.

Am now old and it still holds a v. special place in my heart & am glad I'm not the only one.

#answers #ask box #askbox #this took like 6 hours to type #forgive any mistakes #love wp and could talk forever normally #but yeah

[goldendoodlerlockerlove]

Are y'all ready to see my updated wall of art??

But Doodler, won't you have to take all of that down when you have to move out of your dorm for the summer??

Hush. Let me have this. I worked too hard for this beautiful art wall, and I don't want to think about when I'll have to take it down yet.

I'm going to go from the top left all the way to the bottom right, tag every artist who made all the art you see here, and give a little backstory to the art!!

--Starting at the top left, we have Gene as Cat Stevens, which is an adorable sketch that @koko-raccoon made for me for Halloween when I invaded their inbox for trick-or-treating.

--This is a mini-comic I just Commissioned from @drawthethingdoppelganger of Gene and my Bob's Burgers OC, Alexis. I gave her the roughest and most rushed reference sketch to work with, and she did an incredible job. I'm never getting over the fact that she put a Mickey Mouse on Alexis' shirt and a music note on Gene's overalls. It's so beautiful and perfect and adorable and precious and--

--Here's a sketch I requested from @jae-is-drawing of Bob and Linda in the rain and Linda giving Bob a lil' kiss on his cheek 🥺 They seriously went above and beyond for this sketch, it's so freaking gorgeous and sweet. I can't believe they laid down colors, and did some shading, and lighting too!! They're so talented.

--Then, below the Cat Stevens drawing, is another piece from @koko-raccoon that they surprised me with. They made an adorable piece of my Gravity Falls, OC, Maggie, and her younger, triplet siblings, Dipper and Mabel!! It's the cutest thing ever, I'm so obsessed.

--Then we've got a sketch request that I got from @devilh0rnsinc, and it's so freaking adorable!! I asked them to draw Gene and Alexis sharing a milkshake, and they delivered. I can't stop thinking about them going on a milkshake date now.

--Then, below the Mystery Triplets piece, we've got a Commission I got from @alyssaerin of my sister's and my Animal Crossing characters, who is an extremely sweet and talented artist. I have to thank her once again for being so patient with me throughout the process of when I Commissioned her because I had to cancel my first request, and then when I actually got a request moving, I was a bit picky about the details, pfffft. But it turned out amazing and wonderful.

--Next to that, we've got another @drawthethingdoppelganger piece, and this piece she completely surprised me with. She drew up this fantastic, gorgeous, and colorful piece of Gene (inspired by AJR) and dedicated it to me!! I'm still not over it. Look at his wonderful, flowy hair and his outfit!!

--Then, we've got a Gravity Falls piece I Commissioned from @itscalliebeanie (she's only on Instagram, she doesn't have a Tumblr), of my OCs Maggie and Sydney being adorable dorks together. It came out so sweet and it makes me so happy looking at it. I adore Sydney's guitar. She also did such a good job drawing the shoes!!

--Then we've got the first piece I Commissioned from DT, which yes, I am still not over. It's Bob and Linda based on my "Linda is deaf" AU, and takes place during the episode Something Old, Something New, Something Bob Caters For You, which explains the super cute outfits. But if you've seen my Tumblr at all, you already know all of this, as I've rambled about this piece way too much. But she just did the greatest job on it. Their expressions?? The way you can see Bob signing "yes" with his hand?? Perfect. No notes.

--Next to that, we've got a Boblin piece that DT sketched up and dedicated to me and it makes me so 🥺 Look at them being so happy together. I swear, I am so unwell about Boblin.

--And finally, at the very bottom, we've got a piece I Commissioned from @carnivaldemon of Gene and Alexis. It came out so cute I actually squealed, giggled, and kicked my legs when she sent it to me. The way Alexis is holding an ice cream cone and has a heart on their shirt?? The way Gene is wearing overalls and holding his keyboard and leaning over to kiss Alexis on the cheek?? I can't. Yes, all of those things are things I specifically requested, but still--

#art wall #i'm sure there are even more pieces i could've printed out and put on here but i'm going to run out of space-- #i just want to give a HUGE thank you and shoutout to all of these incredibly talented artists who drew/dedicated art pieces to me #it genuinely means so much to have so many amazing artists put their all into making art for me #this probably won't be the last you'll be seeing of me artists because i'll probably be invading your dms and asking for another piece #also if you can afford it PLEASE commission all of these artists because they're amazing. especially dt

[blackthorn-faerie]

I’m rewatching Good Omens 2, but I’m analyzing it and taking notes this time (I need to know everything). Here’s what I have for episode 1!!

Episode 1

- “Oh, I can. I’m very good at forgiveness. It’s one of my favourite things.” S2E1 9:57

- Gabriel shows up at Aziraphale’s bookshop bc he forgot everything when he got in the elevator. He was gonna take it to hell to find Beelzebub, but he accidentally took it to Earth. Dirty Donkey is across the street from A.Z. Fell and Co, which is a familiar (and angelic) location. Could probably sense that it was a safe space for him to be

- Michael was on the phone with Beelzebub

- The fly can be seen crawling on the box just before Aziraphale goes to pick it up

- “Gayyyyybriel” 20:56

- “Out of his mouth go burning lamps, and sparks of fire leap out” Job 41:19 (written on matchbox)

- When Maggie calls him an angel, he says “nothing of the sort”

- Distancing himself from heaven? He’s no longer an angel?

- Or is it like all the times he claimed he and Crowley weren’t friends/didn’t know each other?

- Is he telling the truth or lying bc he’s scared of the repercussions?

- “Doing good again, angel?” “Oh it hardly counts. A purely selfish action.” (24:40)

- He’s no longer working for heaven, so he’s not obligated to do good. Crowley appears to be teasing him in a “don’t you wanna go apeshit?” kinda way.

- He now has to justify his good deeds by saying they’re for selfish reasons.

- Like Crowley has all along

- Does he see himself as a demon now?

- Like in the Job minisode when he thought he was going to fall for lying?

- Or is he just hella anxious bc of naked Gabriel in his bookshop?

- Nina immediately getting defensive when Maggie gives her the LP

- Says she doesn’t have anything to play it on, which is true, but it’s also a refusal of the gift

- Immediately tries to turn the conversation professional/tries to get Maggie to order

- Then brings up her partner/how controlling she is

- It’s an unspoken “please don’t do extra things for me bc my partner won’t like it”

- Obsessed with the fact that “Jim” doesn’t know literally anything, but found a duster and was like “ooh hell yeah I’m gonna deep clean this place”

- Why is it that they only communicate when they’re arguing?

- Aziraphale really likes suggesting that the only way to solve arguments is for them to separate

- Communicate and then compromise omg

- Crowley can summon lightning

- Why was this never brought up again?

- It might fall under the broad “they’re more powerful than heaven and hell realize” category

- But it’s a big thing, you’d think it’d be brought up again

- But y’know, it’s a plot device for Maggie and Nina’s fanfiction moment

- Michael and Uriel’s power struggle

- Michael’s all “we’re equal, I’m just a little more equal than you”

- Uriel’s all “this is bullshit, why can’t I give the orders too”

- Saraqael is all “shut tf up, you both suck, there are important things to deal with”

- The archangels not only see humans as vastly inferior, they see all the other angels as such too

- And the angels know it too

- Muriel introducing themself as “no one”

- Beelzebub is literally all “Crowley you could have my job if you find my himbo bf for me”

- Extreme sanctions

- “That isn’t actually a thing. That’s just something we used to joke about to frighten the cherubs” (35:37)

- Why doesn’t Crowley know about the Book of Life?? He was a high ranking angel (throne, dominion, or above), why doesn’t he know about the “extreme sanctions”?

- I think the Book of Life is just a bluff

- Nina’s “why not?” when Maggie says she doesn’t drink

- Bracing herself for a sob story or a “it’s so not good for you” type of lecture

- “Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy”

- IT SKIPS OVER “DINING AT THE RITZ”

- I AM UNWELL

- God I hate the fact that Lindsay didn’t go to Give Me Coffee or Give Me Death to check on Nina

- “Worried texts from Lindsay” nope, she’s not worried, she’s abusive

- Why is “a proper apology a humiliating dance?

- Don’t get me wrong, I love the dance, but PLEASE COMMUNICATE OMG

- Zira did the dance in 1650, 1793, 1941

- Crowley cut him off, was he gonna list more times????

- CROWLEY IM BEGGING YOU TELL AZIRAPHALE ABOUT THE EXTREME SANCTIONS

- He hasn’t told Aziraphale that he’s still in touch with hell

- He regularly meets with Shax (EDIT: He does tell Aziraphale about Shax, so he knows that much)

- Didn’t tell Zira about Beelzebub showing up in his car

- It’s almost like he’s not willing to let go of the way things used to be (/s)

- And feels guilty that he’s still in touch with Hell, but Zira isn’t in touch with Heaven

- Jim is visibly upset that they won’t talk to him and they instead talk down to him or talk about him right in front of him

- Was the miracle so strong bc Crowley and Aziraphale together are super fucking strong or because Jim accidentally helped?

- While I love Zira and Crowley together being strong, and the whole point of them being underestimated by Heaven and Hell, I think the latter would be funny

- It’s like Shadwell with his finger

- It could also be another way of tricking Heaven and He’ll like the body swap

- They already think they’re super powerful bc of the body swap, this would add to it

- Probably why the Metatron wanted them either to be split or together on his side

- Doin Mackichan and Gloria Obianyo slayed as Michael and Uriel

- I love the way that Heaven matches the modernity of Earth

- Uriel’s “smartphone” and their clothes

#good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #good omens season 2 #good omens analysis #analyzing good omens bc I am neurodivergent and cannot think of anything else #lmk if you want me to elaborate on anything #i have so many thoughts #no thoughts only them #aziraphale #crowley #nina good omens #maggie good omens #uriel #archangel gabriel #archangel michael #saraquel #slay

[mywingsareonwheels]

Some things that Morse doesn't know about Thursday in s9 of Endeavour (and may in fact never find out).

(Spoilers behind the cut, also CW references to child abuse, alcoholism, violence, and a mention of elder abuse.)

that Thursday taking the job in Carshall was Bright's idea, not Thursday's, and that Thursday needed to be talked into it by Bright specifically because he knew he'd be leaving Morse behind and was unhappy about this for both their sakes. (Honestly I adore Bright and I think he was right to do this, and right in gently encouraging Thursday in s8 to let Morse move on and grow away from them all, but it is still an important distinction!)

that Thursday missed him achingly when he was away (although I think that scene late in 9.1 makes it clear that Thursday would have told him if he'd thought Morse could cope with it... ;-)).

that Sam had a dishonorable discharge, which the family are covering up not because they're ashamed of him, but because they want to protect him.

the full extent of how unwell Sam is and how much this is manifesting in behavioural problems (although Morse has noticed a fair amount of this and knows something is extremely up, but the full degree of it, and how badly it's affecting the whole family? I don't know). Thus, the extent of exactly how desperately worried Thursday is.

that Thursday is a child abuse survivor, specifically of physical abuse from an alcoholic, and that this is his first time in adulthood sharing his home with an angry alcoholic who is (now Thursday is older and Sam in something like his prime, alcohol aside) physically stronger than he is.

(the punch at Strange's stag do is so much more upsetting in that context, I note, as is Thursday's instinctive placation. There's paternal kindness and loyalty and generosity in that moment, but I think there's an old trauma reaction too; it read to me awfully like an emotional flashback. It is extremely fortunate that Sam is very decent indeed deep down, seems shocked by his own action, and is doing better by the end of the episode. Sam is one of two men (the other being Morse) that I would not trust Thursday to even try to defend himself against.)

that Thursday finally gave into Lott's blackmail over Blenheim Vale at the point that Morse's life was threatened. When he talks about the pressures via "family"... he meant Morse, not just Win, Joan, Sam, Charlie, and (arguably) Strange. There were a range of threats, but that seems to have been the final straw, especially as it was the most explicit.

the phone call Thursday got from Ronnie Box trying to encourage him to get out of the situation (and Thursday refusing; he may have taken a while to talk into the new Blenheim Vale investigation but he wasn't going to abandon it once committed until it was that or let people he loved get killed; when the threat was only against himself, nah, nothing doing).

that Lott tried to kill Charlie, and Thursday still doesn't know where Charlie is; what Charlie's done to Thursday is horrible but still, yikes.

that Thursday was dreadfully worried about Morse at the wedding (that's Word of Roger, rather than in the script, mind you, but it would be extremely out of character if he hadn't been).

Morse does go through an awful lot in series 9, but the sheer fricking trauma conga line of Thursday's life in that series, all while he's trying to pretend everything's just fine... ouch.

None of it justifies Thursday's serious fuck-ups and wrongs in 9.3 of course! But I think it's absolutely crucial not to see Thursday entirely through Morse's eyes at any point in s9, because there's such a lot that Morse doesn't know, and for the first time Morse is liable to be far too harsh on his old mentor, not too gentle on him. Thursday is not okay at any point in series 9, and seems to spend the whole of 9.3 breaking down.

(I hope it goes without saying that I am very much of the opinion that Thursday should have told Morse at least some of all this!! But I find it very understandable that he didn't, especially as mostly he wasn't protecting himself, but Sam. Gaaaaah it's all so tragic!)

(Yep, I know I keep saying this, but I actually would find it deeply out of character for both Shaun Evans' Morse and John Thaw's Morse to reject Thursday and even his memory entirely for what happened. Even with the v limited data he knows. Protecting him by never talking about him to anybody while sharing a detailed (if perhaps coded) correspondence with him for the rest of the time they're both alive? Infinitely more likely. And can't you just see Thaw's Morse being that leeetle bit silently smug about still being closer to Strange's father-in-law (or possibly ex-father-in-law) than he is. ;-) )

#itv endeavour #fred thursday #e morse #endeavour morse #fred thursday defence squad #tw child abuse reference #tw elder abuse reference #tw alcoholism reference #endeavour s9 spoilers #endeavour s9 #my fred thursday bullshit continues ;-)

[pixelnrd]

A Personal Announcement 💕

Hi Friends and Followers 🧚🏼‍♀️

So, I've previously mentioned my plan to retire from simblr by the end of 2022, and I promised that I would let you all know more details of when and why in time. I figured that it was time for me to give you all an explanation of what the heck is up... below the cut, for those interested.

The reason I will be retiring from simblr is because...

✨I'm pregnant!🤰🏼

This might come as a surprise. But in the real world, I'm in my late-20s and have a long-term partner/fiance. This is a very happy thing for us considering where we are at in life.

Ok now here comes the wild part...

You know how my sims all have a habit of having twins all the time??

Well. It turns out life imitates art because...

I'm pregnant with twins 👶🏼👶🏼

Yeah, what the fuck right? That bit came as a total surprise to me too.

So that's my big news! I will be having twins in October/November 2022, and I will be retiring once they are born 🐣

I have been very unwell the last few months and playing through the 1960s has been a wonderful distraction from all the unpleasant symptoms. Man, I love sims.

Right now though, I am extremely tired and drained which has been getting in the way of playing and posting. I'm also becoming more preoccupied with getting organised in my real life for parenthood and trying to savour this time before it all changes.

For this reason, I've cut back on the content I share here. I've stopped creating CC and lookbooks, and only post Decades Challenge content.

But I have also realised that it not going to be possible for me to complete every decade of the Langston Legacy in time before I retire. So I have had to make some hard decisions on my end game for the Langstons. The Langston Legacy will now end at the end of the 1980s, when I reach 10 generations.

None of this is to say that I won't ever finish the Langston Legacy in my own time, or that I will never return to simblr - I know there are plenty of amazing creators here who are also parents. But I don't know what my life is going to look like when I become a parent, or how it will change my priorities.

I know this announcement might be disappointing. It disappoints me too that I won't be able to reach the modern-day with this Legacy I have worked so hard on. But, I am heartened by the fact that there are so many other wonderful Decades Challenge stories and Historical creators on this platform for everyone to enjoy, and there will be more I am sure when I eventally leave 💖

Lastly (and I feel a bit weird doing this, because I am not comfortable asking for things), I just wanted to post a link to my Ko-Fi. If you have enjoyed the Langston Legacy over the 2 years I have been posting here, or if you have enjoyed any of my other content, it would mean the world to me as I enter this new (and very expensive) period of my life if you buy me a Ko-Fi ☕There is, of course, no obligation or expectation.

My inbox is ofc open if you want to ask me anything more about any of this 💕

#nonsims #personal

[newtonsheffield]

Miss Kate Sharma and Mr Anthony Bridgerton in you might have some bruises (and a few scars) by newtonsheffield (Moomin_94)

Matrimony- Gentleman, 27, seeking eligible lady. Respectable income made from farming livestock and barley in Aubrey, Kent. Gentleman lives with, and provides for six younger siblings and is seeking a wife who would tend to their care and education first and foremost. Family is very important and as such would be willing to provide a living for the lady’s family should this be required. Please send responses through Mrs Williams, Aubrey village. -Mr A E Bridgerton Published in The London Herald 12th April 1812

Dear Mr Bridgerton,

I hope this letter finds both you and your family well as I know the end of Winter tends to lend itself to small children finding themselves unwell. I am writing with regards to the advertisement I noted in the newspaper this past Friday. I am six and twenty and reside in Somerset, where I grew up, with my mother. My own younger sister, Edwina, is lately married to our neighbour (to no one’s very great surprise!). After the death of our late father, I dedicated myself to my sister’s wellbeing and education and while it was extremely rewarding and I would never wish my life to have been different. However, since her marriage I find myself a little listless, whiling away my time and I am seeking a new challenge. I speak three languages, play the pianoforte, and am reasonably talented with watercolours , but I feel all of this is secondary to the fact that I would take great pride in caring for your family to the very best of my ability.

I believe we would be very well suited to one another and await your response.

My best wishes to you and your siblings,

Miss Kate Sharma

Playlist

#you might have some bruises #marriage of convenience au #kathony #anthony x kate #kate sharma #kate sheffield #anthony bridgerton #bridgerton season 2 #the viscount who loved me #kathony fic #bridgerton fic #moodboard

[boxwinebaddie]

wait omg.. ur fr not updating ur fanfics ever again?!? HEARTBREAKING... BUTT... does that possibly mean u can spoil everything (slowly ofc)

EXTREMELY LONG BUT IMPORTANT UPDATE:

so...i'm not going to say ~never~, my friend. i promised myself during my uncle nina self care era, that i would *justin bieber vc* never say never, because setting strict, set-in-stone regulations and rules for myself is why i am not writing anymore...which, yes, as much as i enjoy my fanfics/updating them, for the sake of both my physical and mental health, i think it is in my best interest to not update my fanfictions right now. i'll explain as much as i can down below.

so...this is going to be a very, very long post. i know that i had an anon on here that told me that they look forward to when i post long, indepth things, however, i am going to say that this isn't like a fun hc post or anything, this is just a lot of information...about my blog and my fanfictions, how i have been feeling and what i'm thinking about doing moving forward from this point. a lot of it is stuff that i've written about a lot ( stress, writing, etc. ) but i think it's important to read, mayhaps? just to keep you in the loop/informed on stuff.

long story short tho: i am not updating my fanfics rn, that's not to say i will not be writing/doing ncu stuff and it does...thank god...mean that i can now slowly spoil things...In A Controlled Manner.

to jog your re(memory), lmao, i was very unwell writing peppermint.

we know this...we don't love this.

what i did love was writing peppermint when i was but doing all that formatting, writing more in one update than some people write in entire fanfictions, forcing myself to be consistent...it was...at times very frightening how unwell i was. especially mentally. i just...i was not well equipped for the stress that came with having a moderately successful fanfic. being perceived at that level, with how severe my social anxiety is...it was not good for me. like it was fun because it was cool to see people so invested/get so much high praise for the things that i was writing but...idk. i am very introverted. ravenstan is me because i try to be really cool but i am a fake and a fraud lmaooo.

but yeah, too much upkeep and while 99.9% of the negativity around pep and myself was self inflicted...i will say...especially after 10, i did get some very...Intense...reactions to my fanfiction. like, very, very intense in a way that i was very offput by it and also worried about how the things i was writing were affecting your real lives. which, on top of how i was doing ( not well ) was not something i wanted to have constantly on my shoulders. please friends, remember, you are not responsible for how other people perceive your work, so long as you tag it accordingly, are authentic to yourself, and respectful to others. or so i believe, at least. idk. this is so long, i'm sorry.

speaking of peppermint tho...i am going to be so honest. i...do not think i'm gonna update it or keep writing it. i know that kind of sucks but the Peppermint Period of my life, i hope, will be over soon, lol. which i LOVE pep, but there is a lot of dark, negative energy associated with it, i tried to write it a million times and can't -- which, fun fact, the last stretch of peppermint is the stan self healing/self care arc ( which i love, i love u so bad pep!stan, my baby, my angel ) and the reason i could not write it...is because i was never in a positive enough headspace to write it.

like...i was not healed enough to write the healing arc. thats...oof.

i also just...don't feel super good about writing stuff about the boys in hs as an adult lady, like? they are 18 and all, but idk, it does not make me feel good things, its just not that relevant to me and the only reason that they were in hs in pep is because all of the relevant tiktok lore surrounding style was senior year hs stuff. but i really just prefer writing the boys in rm/in college/doing adult boy stuff. thats a lot more in my wheelhouse and i feel way better doing that tbh.

a final pep thing that ties into the last part of this ask is YOU CAN ASK ME ANYTHING YOU WANT ABOUT PEPPERMINT. i will spoil everything, like i'd prefer to do it in parts so if you want chapter 12 first i can tell you all about that. i don't have a ton of stuff written out in action...but i have...a fuck ton of dialogue. like nearly all of the dialogue for peppermint is written. ( if you want i can even take the dialogue and write it in sort of stage direction type formats with the actions to make it flow a little better -- i just can't write Chapters )

so yeah, ask me anything at all that you like about peppermint, but i can't spoil the entire fic in one ask...slow pace, please, haha.

okay, rm i do actually care a lot about. i also don't know if i in good concious can write chapter updates for it, but i can give you very detailed asks about it and give you what information i do have about it...also in small pieces. like someone asked me what happened to the ex-cd guitarist...and i can give you that information very soon.

i know it is kind of a bummer to not be able to get updates, but like, when i tell you i was seriously unwell...like it was really bad my real life was getting fucked up because of my online life which is whack.

but yeah! you can also ask me rm stuff! i kind of want to do it as sequencially as i can just so it flows a lot better like, idk, maybe start w/ ravesey hate stuff and move chapter to chapter, answering hc things in between? that feels right to me? but yeah!!! you can ask me what goes in the next chapter? if you want? or the next two/whatever is left of the hate...i don't have a ton of dialogue but i do have p much the whole situation blocked out? ish? lmao rip.

also!!! if i give you any scenario and you would like me to write in more detail or if you'd really like to see it in writing, you can totally leave me a request and if i feel up to it at some point, i will write it up. i also may just feel funky fresh and want to write it one day and randomly post it. lmao just be ready for anything tbh.

BUT YEAH!!! no i will totally give you rm spoilers and stuff!!! but again, i'm gonna try and not give you too much at once...v slow. in that way, ik its not the same as getting my full-fledged chapter updates, but it could hopefully still be exciting because you'd be waiting to get my content and it would come out quicker? which is still neat i think? my way to keep updating you without disappearing or like straining the shit out of my heart and brain.

okay, also, on ao3, as far as Big Writing goes...i'm not sure if i'm gonna post anything actually updatey on there again. it was just too stressful for me yall. i dont even want to make a seperate chapter post of explaination because i really don't want my fic to sit at the top of the tag for days and garner attention or like...wake to people waiting for pep or rm who think they're getting a new chapter, just to get told that i don't really feel safe updating them anymore. way too much attention which is what...drove me to this point tbh.

again, i like tumblr. i like the intimacy. i like that you guys can anonymously send me stuff and for the most part, i like that i can be sort of anonymous on here too...whilist you know, still being able to share stuff on here with you about my life. which...that's also a thing i was gonna mention at the end is, because i'm in education and kids are super nosy, if something happens, i will have to self destruct this blog and i'm sorry.

i am being so serious like if a kid finds my fanfiction tumblr, not only will it be embarrassing/unprofessional, like i am very worried that i could lose my job, slash not do the thing that i love the most in the world next to writing. :( i really do not want the thing i do in my free time to effect my outside life, which, again, is largely why i am doing this to protect myself lmao. like i am seriously considering like deleting anything that has to do with myself at all because of that. i tag my posts as accurately as i can to keep myself and all of you safe. please, please be mindful. please make good choices.

in vein of staying anonymousish ( tbh this is so much information that i ALMOST was going to post this as a voice message but i was not sure putting my human girl voice associated w/ this blog tbh ) i lowkey might nuke the twitter...i don't like it on there, lol. the cancel culture is frightening ( which is not to say don't cancel me if i'm being weird like please do that lol ) the people on there are really intense, i don't like the in fighting...i am on my tumblr because i feel safe here and i like all of you and i like answering your questions.

tbh, rp if you're reading this, the only reason i actually have the twitter is bc riley and i chat on there which, tbh, i might just bully her to use the dms on here or like licherally give you my personal phone number, lol. like we are internet married and talk constantly and i want to delete my twitter so bad it's not funny ESPECIALLY THE VIEW COUNTER LIKE THAT SHIT IS SO FUCKED UP I HATE IT.

kind of why i don't like ao3 either bc the hit count thing...really fucks w/ my mental health. the stress of being boxwinebaddie on there is also a lot so...okay...last segway...i do lowkey want to Actually write tkak...WHICH I KNOW NO ONE BUT ME CARES ABOUT BUT LOL THIS IS MY BLOG I DO WHAT I WANT BROTHER!!! its just funny bc this always happens where i can't write a fanfic i'm writing and then get excited abt some weird concept i have and start writing it and then stop again. so if i am writing tkak, please know it might not finish and i might just talk about it in ask memes.

orrrr write it in my google docs and link you or post screenshots. tbh i am very glad to be away from the ao3 layout like its so fucking ugly. the google docs are so much easier to read in my opinion.

for writing/future fanfics tho...as weird as it is, i don't think i'm gonna attach my name/user to my future fanfics. like you guys can know about them on here as long as we are chill about it. i just get too much anxiety about my association with my account and it getting too hectic again. so if i post tkak, i will probably do it on a different ao3 account ( you guys will know ofc ) and if i post one shot type stuff...i might do it also on a burner account or anonymously.

i actually ALMOST posted remember anonymously because of how stressed i was about it being negatively perceived/it being weird or people being mad at me for not updating pep. like i am very stoked you guys liked it but i seriously almost did not attach it to my name.

so if you see stuff that looks like its me floating around the style tag or in the other south park tags...its probably me. idk drop me a weird code word thats not too obvious and i'll send you one back, haha. i'm sorry i know this is complicated i just...i need to distance myself from this like, when i tell you i needed therapy for this...a mess.

but yeah! i hope that all makes sense! by all means ask me about pep ( literally anything abt pep but try to start small and build up ) and rm within reason and i will get back to you! it is extremely freeing for me to be able to talk about stuff because it sucked so bad to sit on all this info and just not be able to talk about it? like AAAA??? like thats why i was forcing myself to post stuff bc i wanted to tell yall stuff. and i would rather post you well thought out ask memes and dialogue that i feel happy abt then rush out terrible updates and grow to resent my fanfics like...no thank you.

i honestly feel like i have really fun ideas and am ( pretty ) good at coming up with complex lore/interesting hcs and shit, but i'm just not good at waiting, not good at keeping secrets and not good at being consistent...this is what i feel happiest doing, ig. hopefully this is rockin and rollin with you. i'm sorry this was a lot.

closing note is...i love you all very much. thank you so much to all of your for supporting as my identity as a writer has adapted, supporting my multiple works/promoting my personal health, advocating for me, being kind...i could not ask for better readers. again, i realize this is not the most fun information, but i have to take care of myself and this is the only way i know how. while also doing the thing i love, which is talking about my fanfics/writing/sharing my stories with all of you.

you are welcome to click off if you want, but if you are willing to ride the ride my friends, i promise to keep it cute on here. <3

thank you for everything, my darlings, and from whatever hurts or harms you, past, present and future

i hope you heal :),

uncle nina

p.s. if possible, if we could not distribute this post or rb it or anything like that i'd appreciate it. you can message me or write to me in the comments but i would like to maintain the liberty of deleting this post or editing it as i need to in case something happens. tysm.

#ncu update #nina speaks #idk that the tag is i actually think i might make an elaborate tag system so u guys/other people can read my blog #and find specific info abt parts of my fics or chars and stuff #but yeeeeeah i don't want to write right now i do not feel good i do not fuck w the energy i felt after i wrote pep for a while #like i already get sometimes overwhelmed on this blog i dont want to go back on ao3 which is already slow and seriously stressful #you can ask for spoilers tho! please do it in small sections! i am just one person and my fics are very lore intensive #i spend a lot of time on my asks i cannot do too much at once unfortunately #if i post stuff on ao3 again i would rather it not be attached to me ik thats kind of lame but it was mega stressful yall #it also makes it so if people enjoy my work it has nothing to do w bwb and this blog and i can start fresh #if u drop me a code tho i will get back to u haha just if u think its me out there please do not start shouting my name looool #hope this makes sense and hope you heal #sorry this was so much i needed to get this off my chest #you can also ask me questions abt this post it was really ocnfusing i tried to say as much as i can #but i am very tired...which is also why i cant really update bc i am working often and very very tired lmao #just be paitent w me if you can and you always are so i'm not worried ily so much thank u thank u thank u #none of this is spelled right ill fix it later...v tired rip