#i am up at 4 am because i am a lesbian desperately in love with takami keigo.

[bethanydelleman]

Thanks for the tag @firawren & @glassslippers-n-cowboyboots

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 45

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 208,023. And that's a bit surprising because a bunch of my longer fics are only on AHA or my website.

3. What fandoms do you write for? Mostly Jane Austen, all novels, Elizabeth Gaskell (Wives & Daughters), and Anne Bronte (The Tenant of Wildfell Hall). I have also technically written Oscar Wilde and My Happy Marriage, but those were very transformative.

I also have written some fics based on Kdramas, mostly for Alchemy of Souls.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

A Ride to Netherfield - Jane breaks her leg on the way to Netherfield and must stay for a month. Short one-shot (6k) and the first Pride & Prejudice variation I wrote.

Of Every Elizabeth - short and sweet Pride & Prejudice fluff, Darcy has nicknames for the plethora of Elizabeth's he's met over the course of his life (it was a super common name at the time)

Carry Me! - three vignettes of Jang Uk and Cho Yeong from Alchemy of Souls after they are married

The Fourth Bennet Sister - long fic (30k words), Pride & Prejudice variation where Kitty Bennet becomes aware that she is in a novel. She desperately tries to protect her sisters from harm.

All's Fair in Love and War - short Pride & Prejudice variation. Mrs. Bennet has weaponized compromise, men live in constant fear of being forced to marry.

5. Do you respond to comments? Yep. Every time.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Umm.... I'm not good at writing angst. I don't like characters to suffer for too long.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? All of them?

8. Do you get hate on fics? Yes, because I dared to write Mr. Darcy marrying Anne Elliot. People get more angry about that for some reason than Elizabeth Bennet marrying Captain Wentworth in the same fic. Someone even told me Darcy would rather "throw himself off of Pemberley" rather than marry anyone other than Elizabeth. (Fic is called One Week Late)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I have written smut a few times, it's pretty vanilla because I am pretty vanilla. I was reading Victorian erotica when I wrote my longest one, A Little Before Their Marriage (Jane & Bingley fic).

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I constantly write crossovers, my first published novel is a massive crossover, Prideful & Persuaded. One of my fun shorts is Fall on the Sword, where every canonically single woman in Austen's novels decides if they want to try for the recently divorced Mr. Rushworth.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not as far as I know.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No, though someone did translate one of my meta posts from Tumblr. That was cool.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, The Marriage Contest with Branch Cloudsky and two with Amelia Marie Logan, Poor Caroline and Inferior Connections. All Pride & Prejudice fics, all funny. (You need an AO3 account for that one, the other two are on my personal website)

14. What’s your all time favourite ship? Catherine Morland & Henry Tilney. They are the only Austen couple I cannot bear to break up.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I am writing a queer retelling of Emma called "Different Ways of Being in Love", where Jane Fairfax and Emma were lovers as teenagers, Jane is bi, Emma is a lesbian, and Mr. Knightley is ace, but I got stuck on the middle part. Someday hopefully!

16. What are your writing strengths? I'm told I write some pretty hilarious farces. I am told I do characterization well, which is my main goal when writing fan fiction. I try to stick as close to canon as possible.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I don't write enough filler or develop things well enough. I like writing action.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I would possibly try my hand at French, but probably never. I also have a lot of trouble reading accented speech (looking at you Wuthering Heights), so I'd probably never write it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? I am fairly certain I started writing a fix-it fic for Nineteen Eighty-Four after I read it in high school. Not sure I would be able to locate it but it did exist. The first since I started writing again was a sequel to Pride & Prejudice.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Probably Unfairly Caught (my other published work) or The Fourth Bennet Sister. I NEEDED to write a Mansfield Park fic because I hate the ending, so it fixed my dissatisfied feelings. My goal is to edit The Fourth Bennet Sister and get it published sometime this year.

@wurzelbertzwerg, @kehlana-wolhamonao3 and @bad-at-names-and-faces

#tag game #personal #fan fiction #jane austen fan fiction #of course all my highest kudos works are P&P

[lady-of-the-puddle]

All right I've been holding this back for a while but now you get to see my

Rating Tron's Exes

list

The boy:

See? him face

And now the exes:

FIRST UP WE HAVE

1. Dyson

Bougie Rat Bastard 3000

Is the Worst™

Absolute dork loser

Made a grab for power and betrayed his brother his captain hiS KING

Not even hot

2/10 Sucks like the vacuum he is

2. Clu

Discount fuck boi god wannabe

Okay listen

There's chemistry between them

Even if it's toxic af

He's part of Kevin of course he and Tron dated

Yes it was full of hate

Esp when he was stuck as Rinzler 😏

But sometimes u gotta date an asshole to know what u dont want

0/10 Actual Nazi

3. Able

Daddy? Sorry

FATHER material

Has stable job and income

Firm but kind and caring

Will tell u to stfu

Divorce was mutual and they got split custody of Beck so pretty chill breakup overall

10/10 Need I say more

4. Cyrus

Boundaries Were Crossed

Yet another betrayal *sigh*

My boi Tron knows how to pic em

Somehow more crazy than Clu

But less Nazi at least???

Spectacular revenge plot tbh

Looks pretty sick 😎

World's Messiest Breakup

5/10 Dedicated to the bit

4.1 Beck

CRACK SHIP I SWEAR

I know y'all are about to come for me

But listen

Programs have no concept of age

This ship is purely for fun for me, I highly ship them as father and son usually (see: Able)

Something about the desperation and trust issues between them speak to me

We all know it would never work out

7/10 doomed by the narrative (if we HAD ANY)

5. Flynnster

fuck boi God SUPREME

I am highly biased on this

loves Tron so much he ported him from the old system

Spent more time with him than with his own son (-1 point for that)

named everything after him

Tron was ready to give up his own life to save him

ANGST

never officially broke up but he thought he was derezzed so that counts

9/10 HERE WE STAND WORLDS APART HEARTS BROKEN IN T- ok I'll stop

6. Ram

Cinnamon Roll too pure yadda yadda

Wide eyed sweetheart

Never did anything wrong in his short cycle

Was in a brief polycule with Tron and Flynn

Only broke up because he derezzed

What's not to like

11/10 perfect angle

7. Yori

HER

Unpopular opinion y'all are about to murder me

They were each other's beards

She's a nerd lesbian

Because she's hot and I want a chance with her I want her to be

They simply realized they preferred other programs and amicably broke up

She calls him up from the first system every now and then and they spill some hot tea and rebellion tips

100/10 bc im in love with her here have another pic

Anyone I missed?

In conclusion, all users and programs desire Tron carnally, grid's biggest slut, he's in nothing and is my everything thank you for coming to my TRON Talk next time I'll rate Beck's exes cause that's been overcooking in my brain too

#tron #tron uprising #tron legacy #tron 1982 #kevin flynn #tron beck #tronblr #clu #yori #rinzler

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Bengiyo's Queer Cinema Syllabus

I am currently working my way through Unit 4: Heartbreak Alley, the totally light-hearted, definitely not agonizing section of @bengiyo’s queer cinema syllabus where I get to watch countless acts of violence be committed against queer people. Thank fuck I have Lesbians waiting for me at the end of this unit. The films in Unit 4 are: Bent (1997), Strange Fruit (2004),Boys Don’t Cry (1999), Brokeback Mountain (2005), Parting Glances (1986),Philadelphia (1993), The Living End (1992), Holding the Man (2015), Jeffery (1995), and Boys on the Side (1995).

Today I will be talking about

Holding the Man (2015) dir. Niel Armfield

[Run Time: 2hr 8 min, Available: Google Play, Language: English]

Summary: The warm, funny and achingly sad story of the 15-year-long love affair between Timothy Conigrave and the boy he fell in love with at high school, John Caleo. (IMDB)

Cast:

Ryan Corr as Timothy Conigrave

Sarah Snook as Pepe Trevor

Craig Stott as John Caleo

__

So, as anyone who has seen Ben’s syllabus should know, he was very intentional about setting it up as a lead in to BL. Sometimes I wonder how some of the movies may apply, but I definitely understood where he was coming from with this one…

Ben wanted to show any person going through the syllabus the parallels between BL and Western films that let 30 year olds in terrible wigs play high schoolers. 

He also definitely put this movie on the list because these characters are gay boys in a Catholic school. 

gif by @captnswilson

Anyway, I thought this film was very good, it started off very strong not only with the phone call that cannot be more than two minutes that tells you everything you need to know about the characters, how they are connected to each other, where they are in the present. Especially when you know by the time the phone disconnects that John is dead, especially when the camera cuts to three old men looking at Tim as he tries desperately to call back, a stark reminder that Tim and John will never reach old age. 

gif by @captnswilson

I think the biggest thing I was struggling with in this entire movie was how indiscrete Tim and John were being about their relationship. Like, seriously, full confession, I thought the consequences of their physical intimacy would be because of Catholicism. Shielded by my own age I guess in part, but also hugely because of their lack general lack of fear or discretion, I fully forgot it was illegal to be gay in 1970, when Tim is fully reaching his hand down John’s pants at school, and putting love letters on his desk at school, and giving John hand jobs in his living room, and fucking with the doors unlocked when their friends go out fishing. 

That said, I do appreciate that even under the threats from their school, from their parents, they choose each other over and over again. They are unfazed and unashamed of their relationship and I think that sets the movie up to be all the more tragic because you can kinda tell what’s coming. The fact that they have fought against it all, they have loved each other fiercely and openly and relatively unafraid, makes John’s inevitable death all the more tragic. 

I think the production of this film was really smart, with some really wonderful transitions between scenes and the background music, or a line, or a lingering camera shot. For example when Pepe sends the kiss around the table, and after John and Tim have kissed each other and Pepe tries to take any suspicion of Tim’s feelings away by closing the kissing circle, we hear audio which soon after cuts to mass. The line of course being “To those trapped in the darkness of sin that the light shining in Christ may free them…” The way that John’s father thanks Tim for helping John come out of his shell, only for Tim to unzip John’s sleeping bag, literally opening a casing that was covering John a few scenes later so they can have sex and cuddle during a sleepover.  

gif by @captnswilson

The way the editing supports the discovery, the tension of John’s father finding the letter, while we see John and Tim fucking at the cabin, the friends coming back to catch them in the act, the way the music stops when John’s Dad is interrupted from his thoughts as he starts to read the letter around the same time that Tim slams the door shut on his friends. The way the silence in John’s room from his father is co-opted for the silence in the cabin’s living room with all the boys playing poker as if nothing had happened. The close up of Tim’s hand shaking the man he is interviewing, and then the subtle way Tim wipes his hand against the arm of the chair he is sitting in as if he can catch AIDS just by touching someone who has it. 

I have a thing for movies about AIDS letting their characters bleed. I really love the choice, the knowing that comes with seeing those bright trails of red. The weight to it. I love so many acting choices in this film, the scene of Tim and his mother preparing food after he comes home for his sister’s wedding only to find out that his mother read a letter addressed to him that essentially told him he had AIDS. I love when Tim can’t complete a scene after his acting teacher so thoroughly reads him, and honestly…respect, I appreciate that Tim is willing to admit that. I love the image of John’s father closing the door to their house after John puts his foot down, reaffirms to his dad that he loves Tim and says there is nothing he can do about it. Because the door to their house has bars, and it looks like John’s father is locking himself up in a cage. Trapped inside while John and Tim drive off in to the world. To experience it in its fullness while John’s father cowers away. 

gif by @captnswilson

I think the scenes where John was sick and where he was dying was super well performed. Hell, the entire thing was well performed, but to see Craig Stott go from strong athlete to gasping for breath, so sure footed to unsteady on his feet. I am in love with the blushy little smile that John gives Tim when Tim takes his picture and calls him beautiful after they have shaved John’s head, and glued dinosaur figurines to it. This film does such a phenomenal job of realistically, believably portraying love. 

I’m thankful to the writing for acknowledging sex workers and intravenous drug users, they are our brothers and sisters, they are us, we are all family, and I think it is important that we don’t forget them when we discuss AIDS, and the people we lost to it. 

gif by @captnswilson

I think they handled John’s death very lovingly. I am sure that I would have been bawling if I didn’t end up in a lovely two and a half hour conversation with a friend just before he draws his last breath. And again, the choices here, the loud, agonizing breathing John has when he sleeps, and the way the silence settles in when he draws his last breath. I am glad John told Tim in his own way that he was ready to go. That when he collapsed at home it was so easy. There is no way losing someone you love that deeply isn’t devastating, but at least for me, death is a little easier when I know someone is ready. 

I love that John kept his promise, not to die unless Tim was by his side, and that Tim whispering in his ear “I’m here” was what finally gave John permission to go. (I WANTED TO PUNCH A HOLE THROUGH MY TV WHEN JOHN’S PARENTS DIDN’T LET THE PRIEST SAY TIM WAS ANYTHING MORE THAN A FRIEND TO JOHN.)  I loved that we ended the film with Pepe telling Tim that John was by his side, right before we learn that Tim died ten days after he finished writing his book. 

I should have known, I guess, that this was based on a real story, because of the nature of the material, but for some reason I didn’t. Maybe I missed a title card somewhere or something. But I do think there is something so beautiful about being able to immortalize John, immortalize Tim, and immortalize their love for each other in a book. That their love story was told again through film. That there is no way to deny their love for each other now. 

Favorite Moment 

gif by @captnswilson

Honestly, I really loved the sex scene between John and Timothy near the end of the film when they are back in John’s childhood home to celebrate Christmas with John’s family. John has been receiving treatment for cancer, and is very weak, on oxygen and everything since his lungs have been having a lot of trouble recently. I love that every part of it is so slow and tender, John and Timothy dancing together in John’s room, paralleling the way they danced together at Tim’s sister’s wedding not long after their HIV diagnoses. 

John, as weak as he is, as hard as it is for him to breathe, asks Tim to screw him, and we get absolutely the slowest and most intentional sex scene of the entire film (and there are many sex scenes in this film). I do not think that all sex needs to be tender, do not get me wrong, but I did really love the way that with how obvious it is that John does not have much time left, they take their time with this. It is just such a beautiful expression of love between these two. I appreciate too that they make this sex scene beautiful, that sex between an actively dying cancer patient is held as high or higher in beauty and artistry as all the sex Tim and John were having over the 15 year course of their relationship. It is very obvious that this is a last goodbye, but for all that sex has at times been avoided in this film, for the time it brought HIV into their lives, sex is not a bad thing, sex is a necessary and wanted thing, I just liked it as a part of their goodbyes to each other. 

Favorite Quote

“How can you write this play? You’re making assumptions about your status.”

Honestly. What an incredible fucking line. Tim sitting in a room, interviewing a man who is dying of toxoplasmosis because of his HIV status for a play. I am not opposed to people making plays about terminally ill people. I do think it is important to immortalize, to remember, to tell stories. But for the love of GOD you canNOT go waltzing in to a dying man’s apartment, wipe your hands on his chair after you shake his hand because his AIDS disgusts you, and then demand his life story and his thoughts about dying. 

Tim had so much unprotected sex in college, Tim is hiding from the (possible) truth, Tim does not want to know. What right does Tim have to ask others for their stories when he is running from his own? 

Score

9/10

#sorry this is not my finest work #I normally do my write ups immediately after I watch a film but I did not do that this time so things aren't fresh #bengiyo queer cinema syllabus #queer cinema syllabus #holding the man #holding the man (2015) #unit 4: heartbreak alley #two more to go in unit four #the end is in sight #the lesbians are calling to me

[panblackeagle]

I need more roleplay partners

This is an active attempt at making people want to roleplay with me, because I just need more active ones, other than the one that I currently have (they're irreplaceable for sure!)

Now, I accept anything MxM and FxF, shipping OCs is cool, but I mainly ship things from fandoms (I am quite sure that you will recognise at least one of these, trust me). I find gore completely fine and I come for drama, as long as it doesn't come out of nowhere. I write in a weird mix between semi-lit and literate. If I keep myself short, I either don't know what to write or I am preoccupied with something else at the moment. 18+ stuff is good too, I am 20 (I am a pure bottom, but not all that I roleplay is submissive, most of them stand their ground quite well). I am a very creative person, who will most likely find a plot in anything, so if you want to add things aswell, just let me know!

These are the fandoms that I roleplay (+ if I am desperate to roleplay in it lol)

♤Dream Daddy (not really desperate, only doing it if I get to be Damien)

♡Spaloon 1-3 (yes, yes, yes, all of them queer tentacle creatures!)

♤Pokemon (every generation is fine, we can even be the Pokemon, I am a furry)

♡No Straight Roads (I had an incident, not doing it for at least the next few months)

♤The Stanley Parable (not really desperate, I've done it quite a bit)

♡Countryhumans (it's been at least three years, very desperate and I make a good Germany and Finland)

♤Undertale/Deltarune (I never really mind it, even the AUs are cool)

♡Team Fortress 2 (always up for it, if I get to be either Medics)

♤Super Mario/Luigi's Mansion 2-3 (I want to do it from time to time)

♡Jojo's Bizarre Adventure part 3-4 (the most desperate, poor Kakyoin got done dirty!)

♤Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss (eh, could be worse, I'm obsessed with Staticmoth (don't expect me to be Val though))

♡Detroit Become Human (not desperate, but I can make exceptions)

♤Yokai Watch (I just think this one to be fun)

♡Pikmin 1-4 (I'd be willing to try it)

♤Super Smash Bros (I'd be Mii Swordfighter because he's my main)

♡Steven Universe (I'd be up to do it, respectfully for the lesbian space rocks)

♤My Little Pony (Sure, why not!)

♡Sonic (I don't know much, but I am still willing to do it)

♤Villainous (I make a good Flug and Slug, not desperate though)

♡Good Omens (I have not seen the second season yet, but still!)

♤Hetalia (I am not really knowledgeable, but I can roleplay as Ludwig)

♡Sanders Sides (there are possibilities)

♤Fnaf (I really like being Bonnie of any kind ^^)

♡Cookie Run Kingdom (there's good potential in it!)

♤Wander Over Yander (I literally only want to do deathglare and to be Peepers!)

♡Legends Of Avantris - specifically Once Upon A Witchlight or Stardust Rhapsody (honestly, I would absolutely love to!)

♡The Amazing Digital Circus (holy hell, I did NOT expect to dive into royalteeth so deep- (my favourite is Caine, no doubt))

If you are interested in roleplaying with me now, you can comment or dm me. If you prefer roleplaying with me on Discord, I can send you my Discord in dms.

#pokemon #splatoon #countryhumans #roleplay #roleplay ad #tf2 #good omens #hetalia #sonic the hedgehog #villainous #mlp #steven universe #super mario #dream daddy #dbh #nsr #jojo's bizarre adventure #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #undertale #deltarune #tsp #tspud #ssbu #pikmin #yokai watch #legends of avantris #tadc

[batshape]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤

thank you @samarqqand for the tag!! i spent the last two years finishing my masters, writing papers and proposals and a thesis etc, so i’ve been largely ficced out for a long time. but these five are my most darling works, and i will inevitably write more lesbian feanor/nerdanel, because i am addicted to dyke drama and they do it so well.

unfortunately, my two year break from writing fic also coincided with a very long sabbatical from reading fic, and i am desperate to catch up on the everybody’s greatest hits. tagging @i-am-a-lonely-visitor, @undercat-overdog, @crackinthecup, @aipilosse, and @potatoobsessed999 (but if you’ve already done it, feel free to do it again or to ignore)

now in no particular order (at least that i’ll admit), my top fic self-recs:

1. affectation: celebrimbor/annatar, t, 5k words, content warning for inevitable gore and torture mentions

Annatar knew the irritation in his own expression, could taste the disdain in his mouth. He said, rather plainly, “Celebrimbor of Eregion. I am going to eat you.”

i was taking a seminar on archive theory when i wrote this, and the idea of sauron curating an archive of things he took from celebrimbor’s rooms and personal library after his ruin of ost-in-edhil got its teeth into me. the archive building ended up mostly off-screen; instead annatar begrudgingly advises grad students, discovers archive anthrax, and is overall too familiar with his most tolerable colleague.

2. little tenderness: feanor/nerdanel, e, 4k

“Is it not exhausting to imagine abandonment around every darkened corner, wife of mine?”

feanor and nerdanel have t4t lesbian divorce sex following feanor’s exile to formenos. nothing is resolved, and arguably they both get worse. feanor’s missed character potential as a genderfucked lesbian with the same extremely large chips on her shoulder regarding primogeniture, her sons, and high kingship still regularly turns my own brain to soup.

3. letter 97: fingon/maedhros but also gen, t, 9k

“Still the question remains,” Maedhros continued tranquilly, “whether you were offended on my behalf or on yours, when you were accused of keeping a monster leashed for your own amusement.”

the elfschatology one! featuring my own wretched and reprehensible darling, an orc angband escapee doing a little bit of an anthropological study abroad. fingon visits maedhros in himring, wrestles with both his own and maedhros’ wartime uncertainties on what makes an elf, what makes an orc, and what an end to a war would even mean if they made if there. ‘so you want to understand your monstrous boyfriend’s lukewarm concern for his immortal soul,’ a generally unhelpful how-to

4. on gold, and the wearing of red: caranthir & maedhros, g, 4k

“My messengers wear gold in their mouths,” he said curtly, and his brother flashed him a brief smile. The gold of Maedhros’ own teeth shone in firelight.

caranthir’s pre-nirnaeth relationship with his eldest brother as demonstrated through the fashion trends he disapproves of, the ones he adopts himself, and the ones he actively enables. maedhros is more than a little monstrous and simultaneously very beloved by his men and his little brother both. in other words, the sharp teeth fic.

5. to my father’s house: caranthir & finrod, t, 17.5k (4 chapters), content warning for major character death and gore

“It is not a very long dream. There is a servant atop the stairs with a carafe, and one of your brothers is giving a toast, though in the middle of it the servant drops the carafe and—” He gestures vaguely. “—wine, all down the stairs.”

caranthir and his damnably likeable arafinwean cousin, until both their deaths. in which caranthir is also cursed with perhaps the most useless gift of foresight in first age history, and dreams since childhood of the various ways in which he could, would, and ultimately does die. relatedly, there is something so special to me about a man who does fiber arts and is also unfalteringly miserable.

you can find the rest of my fic at ao3 under batshape.

#i love to lesbianize an unbearable bastard #thank you samarqqand for the tag!! #and excellent username as always. #apologies that it took so long! #fic rec #my fic

[thesteriuswife]

My actual full convoluted feelings re: sharing are this:

when it comes to Theseus and Asterius, I've only ever encountered 2 other people who Also shipped with them. One of them seems to have deleted their blog and the other was very casual about them (had other F/Os they were more into) so it's not something I worry too much about re: other shippers. However I am an insane woman and Very particular with my interpretation of Theseus and Asterius as people And their relationship so it feels like it's for the best to just say No here. Lest I become insane one day

I am the world's biggest hater of Theseus and Asterius' second-most popular canon x canon ships (in this case, theseus/zag.reus and asterius/hyp.nos). Those two ships make me wildly uncomfortable. However... I love some specific rarepairs 💖 Theseus/Asterius shipped with Achiles/Patroclus very funny to me but no one depicts it in the way I like (which is comedy focused!! the only times I've seen it it's always about like Theseus getting pwned or something. Why not the inherent comedy of Pat getting really, really mad about having a crush on Theseus). I also like Theseus/Alecto and (my evil rarepair that I made up for ME) Theseus/Nyx. sorry. I actually don't have any other Asterius ships bc my demisexuality HC for him overrides anything else 😭 my love for diathesterius is bigger than my affection for any of these of course

I'm okay with people saying horny/vulgar things under my art of Theseus or Asterius as long as it's funny. if it's Not funny then I'm not a fan. I admittedly Do get a little fussy seeing other people casually calling Asterius their husband (it's always with Asterius) but it's not something that's block-worthy to me

When it comes to AZ I don't like Any canon x canon ship with him. Not that there's a lot of these but they exist and I'm not a fan personally ! This has less to do with selfshipping and more to do with me being very, Very picky with canon x canon ships though.

I've only encountered 2 (maybe 3?) other ppl who selfship with him....... one of them sometimes reblogs the art of him I post to my main! I'm not exactly comfortable sharing him with other selfshippers BUT. Because AZ is such an unpopular character and his few fans are desperate for art of him ( know because I'm desperate for art of him too 😭) I don't block about it.

AZ is another chara where the discomfort with sharing comes from the fact that I'm very particular about my interpretation of him. I would Never go up to someone and call their interpretation completely wrong (especially for a character who only has like 4 or 5 scenes in the actual game), but I've seen some people write him as cruel/malicious in a way I dislike 😭 i think he is capable of being cruel at times, but it's less like... A Conscious Effort to be Cruel and more of a side-affect of his selfishness. Also I think I'm the only person in the world who has diagnosed him as a she/him agender lesbian

Hmm I sure do get attached to characters who struggle with selfishness don't I. ignore that.

#📜 muse's voice

[spocks-evil-godmother]

Rating Call the Midwife Characters because I have watched nine and a half seasons and I can

Jenny - girl you got us rolling but you were mediocre af 5/10

Trixie - somehow she is the best and worst of femininity at all times and is just like. Amazing and I love her and also god my eyes are broken from rolling them too hard 8/10

Chummy - truly one of the most perfect women of all time but she married a cop (alas) 8/10

Shelagh - do I forgive her for abandoning her vows and running off to be with the man she loves? No. But do I adore her anyways? Yes 7/10

Dr. Turner - here is the thing. I don't forgive him either. But also he's A GOOD MAN and I LIKE HIM A LOT. I feel like people think that the reason he's hot is because of his face but it's actually because in his decade of service he has never once talked down to or ignored the expertise of his midwife colleagues and listens to women so although he's not one of the girlies he can also have 7/10

While we're here, Tim - you were the most interesting when you had polio and aspirations of a mother sorry bud 4/10

Patsy - on the one hand she was a lesbian, which gives her high marks, but I don't remember, like, anything else about her so.... 6/10

Barbara - FUCKING BARBARA GHSKALAALFB I DON'T EVEN KNOW. But like I can't blame her for leaving the show when I love Ghosts even more. 6/10 despite everything.

Phyllis - nurse Crane my beloved. I respect her. She's very organized and practical and I do just feel like organized, practical women are great. Anyways no need to read into that at all 9/10

Valerie - VALERIE. Valerie. She was cool but I feel like she just... never got an arc. she got some trauma and some woes definitely but idk about an arc. 6/10

Lucille - she is SO NICE but she doesn't believe in SINNING which makes me sad but she's a sweetheart and is so kind during the bad times 7/10

Cyril - I have always loved that part where he's a pastor but only on the inside lol 6/10

Fred Buckle - truly a perfect man. No notes 10/10

Violet Buckle - I am so obsessed with Violet. I feel like the only reason she is nice is because she is married to Fred but if she was just introduced to the show, unattached, then she would be what we in showbiz call an Antagonist and yet she still lets it pop up sometimes 5/10

Reggie - I love him 7/10

Mrs. Higgins - desperately want to know what kind of lady this actress is irl because she is either absolutely hilarious or completely unhinged but as a character I don't care for her 3/10

Sister Julienne - um she's my mom and also she's your mom and maybe she's everyone's mom and ever since she went to see The Sound of Music by herself to showcase her crisis of faith I have just completely melted about her 15/10

Sister Evangelina - I JUST WANT TO BE A MEAN NUN WHEN I GROW UP BECAUSE OF HER SHE'S SO GOOD I LOVE HERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 50/10

Sister Mary Cynthia - she was SO GOOD and then..... god. 5/10 heartbreak emoji

Sister Winifred - 😬 ummm I just didn't care. Sorry 3/10

Sister Hilda - not even Sister Julienne's bff smh 4/10

Sister Frances - BABY NUN!!!! SHE IS THE BABY NUN WITH PCOS I LIKE HER A LOT!!! BABY NUN!!! 11/10

And yes I know you are all obviously waiting for the most important character of the whole show and who just lives on another level compared to every other character because she is

SISTER MONICA JOAN - MY HEART MY SOUL MY MIND MY STRENGTH I AM SITTING ON THE COUCH NEXT TO YOU AND WE ARE ARGUING ABOUT WHAT TO WATCH ON TV TOGETHER AND SHE GETS TO BE A HERETIC AS A LITTLE TREAT ALWAYS 1000/10 💖🙌🤩😘💕 SISTER MONICA JOAN WOOOOOOOOO

#call the midwife #mitch pitch #this show made me think i wanted to be a nun #and then having worked at a church i now realize i absolutely can never be a nun #which is too bad because you would think i would be a great nun

[asvterias]

𝖲𝗈𝖿𝗍!𝖬𝖺𝗑 𝖬𝖺𝗒𝖿𝗂𝖾𝗅𝖽 𝖧𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖼𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗈𝗇𝗌

Tag List: @clarkegriffinslever

a/n: Basically season 4 but without its actual plot. Kinda long.

Soft!Max x Black!Byers!Girlfriend!Reader

• You are Joyce's daughter (adopted and same age as Will)

• When she first came to Hawkins, you immediately intrigued her with your dashing cocoa brown skin and your amazing sense of style

• Would often see her at the arcade and sometimes she would invite you to play with her

• You became her first friend and she was ecstatic

• Until she started to realize her feelings for you two months later in the friendship

• She would distance herself away from you to question her sexuality

• The Mayfield girl came to terms that she was a lesbian

• “Why are you avoiding me?”

• “Because, I just discovered something about myself and I don't know…if you'd accept me for it.”

• “Whatever it is, I'll always accept you, foxy.”

• “…I'm a lesbian.”

• “So am I.”

• “No, you don't get it [name], it's more than that. I think that I'm falling in love with you.”

• “Oh….”

• She let out a defeated sigh, “That's what I thought. You know, can you just forget about this so it doesn't ruin our friendship — even if we still are friends.”

• “Me too…”

• “Wai- what?!”

• “I'm falling in love with you too and I didn't confess because I didn't think that you would ever reciprocate those feelings.”

• “So does this mean that we're dating now?!”

• “Relax, mayfield, at least take me out for dinner first.”

• So that was how your loving relationship with max blossomed

• Your redhead girlfriend is such a cute smol bean

• Whether it's protecting you or loving you, she is a goddamn multitasker

• Max would never want to admit it but she got dating advice from Robin and Steve

• Mostly she ignored Steve and listened to Robin's advice (which was pretty good)

• So since you're friends with Vickie, Max tries to set Robin and Vickie up as a thank you

• Safe to say that they worked out so now you go on double dates occasionally

• She is the adventurous type and would make you try new things with her

• During summer break, you both took up photography, pottery, and painting class

• As soon as max was given that camera, she would non-stop take pictures of you

• Unexpectedly, Max was pretty amazing with art

• Mainly her focus was on you because you were her beautiful masterpiece after all

• Her beautiful melanin princess

• So most of her paintings were mostly you

• Now onto pottery

• I feel like max would hug you from behind and kiss your neck, desperate for your attention while you were doing pottery in the comfort of your home

• Or she would come up from behind and pepper your cheek with kisses while helping you shape it

• Max would definitely teach you how to ride her skateboard

• Like she is a helicopter girlfriend

• By that, I mean that her arms will be wrapped around your waist

• Now this is exclusively rare because she lets no one on her skateboard but herself

• Instantly, when you first got hurt riding the skateboard, the redhead completely freaked out

• So now you wear a helmet, elbow and knee pads

• The whole party was completely shooketh

• “So you’re telling me that max let you ride her skateboard and you live to see another day?”

• Meanwhile, you teach her how to bake

• She would steal cookies as they were cooling down

• “Maxy, did you steal one— FOUR cookies!!”

• “No, baby I haven't seen any cookies,”

• Your nicknames for her would be: maxy, my redhead, foxy

• Her nicknames for you would be: baby, darling, sweetheart

• One time she wanted to surprise you by baking you a cake just for being the best girlfriend to her

• That was a complete catastrophe

• Max + Baking = Horrible Match

• You literally had to call the fire department

• If max was aiming for an unforgettable birthday, she surely took the cake

• If you were sick even if it was just the flu

• May God help you

• “Do you need soup? Do you want me to fluff your pillows? Do you feel like vomiting?”

• Refuses to give you kisses while you're sick

• “No, baby. You need to get better then I will give you all the kisses that you desire.”

• Max would definitely want to wear matching Halloween costumes

• During Christmas, Max loves it when you put extra marshmallows in her hot cocoa and she loves it when you lay on her chest, all cuddled up with her arms wrapped around you, watching Christmas movies

• When you went on summer vacation for two weeks, it was like torture for her

• Even though she had Eleven and Robin to talk to, it wasn't the same

• Regularly calls you to just hear your angelic voice

• Becomes instantly flustered when Jonathan or Will teases you

• “[Name], it's your girlfriend again!”

• She would send you poems and love letters but wouldn’t admit it to anyone else but you

• I reckon that she draw cookies and skateboards on the header of the letter so you know it's from her

• Rarely gets jealous cause she trusts you but if someone takes it too far

• You WILL be going to school the next day, your neck covered in hickeys

• Is definitely the small spoon

• There were times when you would rest your head on her shoulder, falling asleep but the boys would ruin the vibe

• “Be quiet, you shitheads, can't you see she's asleep?” Then she would put her arm around you and kiss the crown of your head

• She adores it when you wear her hoodies

• For some reason, your girlfriend ALWAYS loves when you have your hair in an afro

• Tries to help you unbraid your hair when summer is over

• If you two fought, max would normally be the one to apologize first

• The redhead would buy matching lockets

• So during your 2nd year anniversary of dating, she gifted you a photo book with photos of you both and has them labeled with all of the dates as well

• “I'm gonna marry you one day.”

• “And I can't wait till that day comes.”

• You two are the dream couple in Hawkins

© asvterias, 2022. please do not plagiarize any of my works.

#stranger things #stranger things headcanons #fluff headcanons #stranger things fluff headcannons #max mayfield #max mayfield x fem!reader #max mayfield x black!reader #max mayfield headcannons

[luvclimber]

☆Introduction☆

☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆

☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆

About me:

1: Hello there! Welcome to my blog! You call me by my username or Climber, but my real name is Alana but I will mostly feel comfortable going by my username! My pronouns are He/Him but I’m actually a female but I feel oddly comfortable with those pronouns than She/Her pronouns! I’m also quoisexual which means I cannot relate neither understand experiences or concepts of sexual attraction and orientation, but it could also mean I'm confused about my own feelings of sexual attraction and orientation! I’m also a multifandom, multishipper, rareshipper, crossshipper as well!

2: I am a self-taught artist! I have had many moments in my life where I felt about giving up on art, but I have soon to realize that I started to get better at art the longer I continued to try and practice on my own and make more art! I was a little hesitant on showing my art work to the public internet community since I thought people would make fun of it! But I saw that people started to like my art work that I post and so that gave me more confidence to post more of my art work and improve!

3: There are specific stuff that I post on my blog, things such as DemJay, Law of talos, Endzone, Burning Avalon, Witches dimension! I will sometimes post some slightly suggestive stuff but I will mainly post normal and fluff art of my favorite characters! But I may take a week off here and there every once in a while but I promise to post daily every week!

☆Press keep reading☆

Random facts:

1: I have actually been through many sexuality from the start of a very young age! I desperately tried to look for the right sexuality that fit me! I went from thinking I was a lesbian, straight, bisexual, asexual, pansexual, aromatic, to finally finding the right one that fit me! Quoisexual!

2: I was a Lankybox fan for a long period of time until they started to post some stuff that I didn’t really find entertaining anymore? I guess that’s how you can put it? I mainly started to watch TikTok and other YouTubes more often now. I actually had a Lankybox TikTok account which one was Gacha and one was edits of them! But I did end up deleting them and changing my account entirely. I did have one other Gacha account on TikTok that I was famous on but sadly I got logged out.

3: I have a YouTube channel that my father used for my garden, the channel and videos are still up, actually! But of course I won’t give you the name of the YouTube channel because I find them cringe and the videos were so long ago-

4: Whenever someone new follows or likes my post I just take a look at their account and see what type of stuff they post! So I kinda stalk your account for a little while!

Interact if:

People who are in the DemJay, Law of talos, Endzone, Burning Avalon, Witches dimension fandom! I love meeting people who have the same interest as me!

Climber fans or kins! I actually have been a fan of Climber since 3 years ago! Also I don’t want people to think I’m saying I’m his number one fan since I find it cringe to say I’m his number one fan. I just really love Climber and could relate with him-

Artists and small artists! I love seeing people’s different styles in their drawings and the fact they put work into it! Like I said, I’m a self-taught artists and worked to get to find the art style I like!

Do not interact:

Problematic people! I really feel uncomfortable with people who are problematic follow me. Even if you are associated with a problematic person, please do not interact with my account.

Homophobic people! And you probably already know why, I post a lot of gay ships and I don’t want homophobic people to associate with my account to just hate.

People who are firm believers about being a hater. If you’re going to simply going to go on my account and hate for no reason, you will get a HARD block! All of us are just trying to have fun!

#☆~ #Blog intro #~☆

[chronicowboy]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by my love @shitouttabuck thank you soooo much i'm so bored catching up on lectures

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

66 for buddie but 79 overall

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

609,231 HA WHAT

3. what fandoms do you write for?

used to write for tfatws and aos but now it's 911 or nothin

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

let's build this house (into a home, baby) did not know this was my top so glad it is tho my absolute baby beloved

please? (can't say no) okay fair i do love this one surprised it's number 2 tho

memory (all alone in the moonlight) okayyyyy

not all of us are heroes (not all of us are brave) my titles are so shit i had to check to remember which one this was but yeah kinda slay

accidents happen (but i will love you on purpose) so glad this stupid silly turned heavy romantic little fic made it into top 5

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

on my bigger fics i always always do my best to reply to every comment just because of how much effort i poured into it and i want my wonderful beautiful commenters to know how grateful i am for the comments, i try to on my smaller fics but the reality of the matter is my brain is unimaginative when it comes to thank yous and i'm terrible at keeping up with shit like that but just know i read all of them and appreciate them sooooo goddamn much !!!!!!!!!!

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i am probably incapable of angsty endings even when i write incredibly angsty fics so uh it'd probably some of my cross-posted little lightning era ficlets like i couldn't say no which is very chris-centred

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

literally like 99% of them are sappily happy because i'm disgusting and fragile when it comes to these men but it'd probably be the gross, gooey ending of the safe haven baby fic

8. do you get hate on fics?

no?????? idk if i'm just very lucky or have blocked it out but i don't think so

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

i do but like. in the loosest possible sense. i try to keep it as vague and non-explicit as possible unless it's crucial to the story bc i am pretty sure i'm a little lesbian and dicks freak me out!!!

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

i mean. i guess technically the parks and rec au could be considered a crossover of some sorts what with lil sebastian but apart from that.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

don't think so?

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

not that i know of but i have had a podfic made which is awesome!!!

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

no god i feel like that would stress me out way too much. like i'd love to write with some of you beautiful minds on here but i am very poor at deadlines and group projects either make me incredibly stressy and lazy or control freaky and i wouldn't want to inflict that upon anyone

14. what’s your all time favorite ship?

fuck. i mean. that's just. i feel like with 66 works and like 300k words you'd expect it to be buddie and i love them deeply but at the heart of me i am a merthur girlie through and through. they were the og. they were my whole world. they still are. nothing like two tragic little gay men so devoted to each other that it makes them severely fucked up!!!!!

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh my god. fuck. huh. there are like five aus that i am so desperate to write and have kinda-sorta planned but to call them wips would be very generous. there's the queer bar au which i WILL write one day, then the game night au, the nice guys au oh my god i love her deeply, the new girl au of course bc nickeddie has me in a chokehold despite not writing a word of him and then the merthurbuddie au i actually will never write bc i know it'd be 300k words long and take up the entirety of my life for like a solid year.

16. what are your writing strengths?

uh dialogue? i've always been told my writing's very cinematic and i'm experimenting more with scripts (play mostly but a little bit of tv and film) in my creative writing course.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

oh god. description. i feel like there's never enough between my dialogue idk. and my description is always so like. functional. i got scared of purple prose in high school and overcorrected somewhere along the way lollllll

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i love it, i try to avoid it because i always overestimate what i'll be able to remember from 5 years of spanish courses and then end up thoroughly humbling myself, would love to do it more but yeah apparently my brain just doesn't cooperate with other languages which suckssss

19. first fandom you wrote for?

okay well. it was marvel. and it was sambucky i think. either that or some irondad on this blog. but we're going to ignore that!!!!!! it was a dark time!

20. favorite fic you’ve written?

oooh boy oh man. um. want to say no rizz kink fic bc i had so much fun writing it but i know it's one of my aus. i just can't decide between neighbours, parks and rec, national treasure or gilmore girls. whoops

tagging: uh feel like i'm very late to the party so ignore if you've already been tagged lol @butchdiaz @eddiebabygirldiaz @folk-fae @piningeddiediaz if u guys want <3

#sami rambles #oh my god i have to catch up on a 2 hour grammar lecture after this (HELL!!!!) but this was a nice break #very fun until you asked me to choose between my babies!! #tag game #mutuals <3

[https-chaos]

I just got into a huge fight with my mom because she's pushing the hell out of me to bring her to pride and there are so many reasons I will not be doing that but it really boils down to 4 things:

1. Pride isn't safe this year. It's an anti-cop protest at its core, and it's in a big city in a year where there's a lot of hate and violence against the queer community. Not only do I not want my family to be unsafe in the case of violence from extremists or police, but I don't think people who don't believe in ACAB should go to an anti-police protest. She has a few local cop friends and genuinely believes all police want is to help people because those 3 small town cops in their 50s don't seem THAT racist or homophobic.

2. She makes a lot of lowkey homophobic comments along the lines of "I don't hate gay people at all, I just don't want to see them kiss. But I don't want to see straight people kiss either!" But she only brings it up when she sees a gay couple kiss. Never when there's a 3 minute straight sex scene in a movie, only when there's a 30 second gay kiss. She has also told me about a hundred times that she "could see me marrying a man one day" because she thinks if I find a feminine enough man I'll stop being a lesbian. Specifically I believe her ideal situation for me would be a lavender marriage with a gay man. You know, like it's the 60s? She also has an incredibly childish outlook on life and often quotes Horton hears a who and says "a person is a person" but her actions don't back up that innocent facade at all.

3. I don't think she would be able to keep her mouth shut about the kink, leather, men in thongs, people kissing and groping, people on leashes, people in fur suits, etc. When I brought this up she literally said it was just like Mardi Gras; she doesn't approve of people taking their shirts off and she thinks anyone who does anything she considers 'weird' is asking to be gawked at. She said if she saw a man in a thong she would go 😧, like she made that exact face. When I told her she can't do that because if a man wears a thong to pride he's looking for attention from other gay men, not shock from 55 year old straight women, she said I was too naive to understand. I told her that not only can she not make a face, a side eye, or a comment to anything she sees at pride, but that she also couldn't talk about it on the way home, at home, or ever. If you go to pride you know what you're gonna see and I don't wanna hear her disgust.

4. Even if she could keep her mouth shut about the kink, and she for some reason wanted to go somewhere that would make her uncomfortable on purpose, I don't understand why she would want to go with me when I was very clear that I will be talking to women, going to a lesbian bar after, and might even (gasp) kiss someone I don't know. I told her she wouldn't have taken my grandma to a bar while she looked for a boyfriend, because having your mother with you is kind of a deterrent to talking to people your own age. By my age she was married with a kid. I have no local friends, at all, and I would like to change that at pride. Going to the parade, standing silently to watch with my mom, not acting proud at all for fear of being shamed by her, and then immediately going home isn't going to help me make queer friends.

I guess I don't really have a specific point to all of this, I'm just so confused about why she is so desperate for me to never be in a situation where I might make a friend or even meet someone I could love. I live in her house. She sees how desperately lonely I am. She sees how badly I want to have a friend, or a girlfriend, or literally anyone except her and my sister and my dad. I don't understand why she takes every opportunity to preach her weird childish nonsense. Everyone should just hold hands and love each other, love is love, a person's a person, but please don't talk about politics or anything scary or negative because she can't take it. I don't understand her aversion to pda and I don't understand why she feels the need to pester me about it. I don't understand what she doesn't understand about the fact that I grew up terrified to tell her anything, to the point where she thinks I had an incredibly happy childhood. I can't afford to leave this house, and how does she not realize that if she had given me the support I needed in school and allowed me to be medicated maybe I could have gone to college and made something of myself? How does she think none of this is her fault? I'm going to be 27 in a couple days and between her and the man that beat my confidence into the ground for the last five years, I'm almost too traumatized to even leave the house. I don't know what to tell her that'll get it into her head that her barely adequate tolerance of my lesbianism doesn't automatically mean I want her at pride.

#im hurting #pride #long rant #homophobia

[stealth-liberal]

So, @randombtsprincessa tagged me in her Tulip Tagged Games, so here we go!

1. Three Current Ships:

1st- Sesshomaru x Sango (Inuyasha): Non-canon as all hell, but I loved this ship back in the day. My daughter has discovered anime, and I'm doing a rewatch of Inuyasha with her and rediscovered the love. Thankfully, people produce fics for this pairing.

2nd- Killi x Tauriel or Killiel (The Hobbit movies): I've been a fan of this pairing from the very moment they shared the movie screen together, and I still am now. The Hobbit was in DESPERATE need of female characters as there were zero in the book, and so Tauriel is a movie only character and their romance is movie verse only. I love the gender flip dynamics on this one. There's an age gap, she's the older one because she's an elf and he's a dwarf. There's a height difference, she's the taller one because, again, she's an elf and he's a dwarf. There is the badass and damsel dynamic, but she's the badass and he's the damsel in distress.

3. Siuan x Morraine (The Wheel of Time): I'll be upfront, I do NOT like the books, but I enjoy the TV series. This pairing has everything, longing, secrecy, tragedy, redemption, sexy hotness, and the fact that they were made for each other. This is a WLW pairing, and I am an unabashed femslasher. I guess I will take this time to bemoan the fact that great WLW pairings get next to no love in fandom while MLM pairings are panted after with an intensity that borders on the desperate. As a queer woman I say this: Tis not fair.

2. First Ship:

Kazami x Sui (NP by Banana Yoshimoto): As a bisexual girl growing up in a time where gay and lesbian representation was few and far between, there was even less about bisexuality. NP was a novel about a young Japanese woman named Kazami Kano who was struggling with, among other things like translating a short story that seems to result in the suicide of everyone who tries to translate it, the notion that she might be bisexual and that she might be attracted to and want to date a woman named Sui. This was the first time I REALLY shipped a pairing, that I invested beyond the norm in a couple. I was just so happy to see this depiction of emerging bisexuality in a young woman, that I gobbled it up. I still own this book, and every now and then, I will reread it.

3. Last Song I Listened To:

Artemis by Lindsey Stirling

4. Last Movie I Watched:

I just rewatched The Old Guard on Netflix with Charlize Theron. Can't wait for the sequel to come out this year!

5. Currently Reading:

The Ghosts of Eden Park by Karen Abbot: It's a gossipy true crime/history book about bootleggers, murder and Prohibition in 1920's Cincinnati, Ohio. What can I say? Crime is always classier when it's in the 1920's.

6. Currently Watching:

I just finished, as in yesterday, season 1 of Surreal Estate on Hulu. It's a SciFi network show about a fictional real estate agency that specializes in selling haunted houses. It's not a Ghost Hunter style show, it's a regular horror/comedy show. It's really fun and everyone should watch it. Season 2 will be released sometime this year.

7. Currently Consuming:

I just ate 3 pieces of Godiva chocolate that I got for Valentine's Day and drank a passion fruit La Croix.

8. Currently Craving:

Like any good Jew on a cold and windy day, I am craving shakshuka. Which are yolky eggs cooked in tomatoes, with peppers, garlic, other spices, and at least in my family, served over rice.

Now to tag some other people!

@bts-hyperfixation @stillthecozywhaleshark @reliablemitten @thebirdmum

[gonnagowherethedreamersgo]

I posted 438 times in 2022

62 posts created (14%)

376 posts reblogged (86%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@dailywilliams

@searchingforjunecarter

@tattoos-n-puffers

@still-into-paramore

@melindasordinos

I tagged 413 of my posts in 2022

Only 6% of my posts had no tags

#tegan and sara - 70 posts

#paramore - 40 posts

#hayley williams - 35 posts

#elliot page - 32 posts

#kristen stewart - 31 posts

#the umbrella academy - 29 posts

#taylor swift - 22 posts

#a league of their own - 22 posts

#the umbrella academy spoilers - 21 posts

#tegan quin - 19 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#confirmed actually her baby from the liked comments on twitter and the podcast released today where she mentions installing a car seat cause

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

So, I took this guy’s information and maybe about a year later I emailed him and told him I was moving to Montreal. It was February the week I moved there and it was fucking freezing, the kind of cold where you know that if you stay out too long you’ll actually fucking die. Anyway, we began to hang out and go out for dinner, but I started to get the sense that maybe those dinners were like dates or something. I don’t know that to be true, and he seemed really cool and sweet, but after nine days or so I knew I had to just be straight up with him. I asked him if he knew any gay people and he said, ‘Actually I’m in art school with a girl and I think you’d really like her,’ and he took me over to introduce me to her. Her place was in a brownstone, kind of like in New York, and we climbed all the stairs up to the top apartment, and when we got inside there was what sounded to me like a horrible racket. The kind of music where you’re like, ‘What in the fuck is this?’. Then this girl comes around the corner and I was immediately kind of intimidated, because she was clearly gay and super cute. She took us into the living room and gave us a beer and then went to get ready because we were going to go to some kind of lesbian Meow Mix kind of event. I’ll never forget Antoine and I just looking at each other and I was like, ‘This song, right? Crazy!’ and it was “Fuck The Pain Away” by Peaches. Anyway, the end of that story is that I ended up dating that girl and she became our band’s art director, and has been our art director for almost 20 years. She absolutely fucking loved Peaches. I was so not ready for that electroclash sound at the time, but because I desperately wanted to be cool and I thought she was the coolest person in the world, I started to love everything that she loved. And so I became obsessed with Peaches too.

Sara Quin talking about meeting Emy for the first time

28 notes - Posted November 28, 2022

#4

I felt so supported by everyone. We were shooting right after I disclosed that I’m trans, in total isolation. That was definitely an overwhelming period, but I feel so lucky that I was going to work and getting to be with so many supportive people. I’m so lucky to work with this cast. And in any moment that I did express fear and anxiety, I felt listened to and cared for. And obviously, that should be the case all the time, but we know how things are. So, it’s special. And that Steve, you would make the choice to do this and commit to doing it the right way. I feel like that’s the kind of showrunner you are and have been doing that the entire time we’ve been making the show, including last season with Sissy. So it was just building on already that you’re so wonderful because you have your distinct singular vision mixed with being so collaborative and I’m really grateful for that, always.

Elliot Page

30 notes - Posted June 26, 2022

#3

See the full post

31 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

#2

See the full post

58 notes - Posted June 8, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

“I am deeply gay - sorry concerned, deeply concerned. It just feels like this is gonna make kids gay and trans - sorry depressed and suicidal, and I just think these laws are lesbians - sorry unconscionable!”

88 notes - Posted March 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #Youtube #this is so funny #19 posts about tegan quin call me #i think if I showed this and my spotify wrapped to a therapist they'd be really concerned

[sassygwaine]

for the writer meme (lotsa good ones here and i couldn’t pick so feel free to skip some if u want): 1, 2, 4, 5, 7/8, 14!

i am skipping 7/8!! otherwise i will spend too much time in my documents and not actually taking the break i’m supposed to be taking :p

1. Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic.

whump, hurt/comfort

i really like to be a soup with the misery and pain, and then also the balm after.

2. Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to?

secondary character who everybody loves is actually the villain

i don’t typically dabble in much action (altwss has some big departures from my comfort zone) but i would looove to play with the dramatic irony and making that reveal so fucking satisfying.

4. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

oh man

there’s a couple ofmd ones:

- the fantasy au, ofc

- there’s a lucius/pete college au i’m working on that’s truly just dissolving into smut, so who knows if that’ll ever see the light of day. essentially stede is lucius’s advisor, lucius has to take a gen ed credit in math, ed is his math professor—he does not know they are married to each other, just that they’re old and gay and married and in love with their husband(s) and he’s jealous and lonely. he meets pete in this math class.

- a ‘they’re lesbians harold’ canon au, which, you guessed it, mostly smut!!! but it’s got the really fun play of totally avoiding the end of ep 9 and ep 10 entirely bc truly women do it different. (you can’t tell me a gay woman in 1717 who managed to get away from her forced marriage would ever consider that place safe harbor to return to, regardless of her feelings of guilt!!!) so in this version, they escape together as planned and return to the revenge (it’s all very handwavy, as is tradition). the trick now is that stede has no idea if the kiss was a heat of the moment thing or if ed actually likes her…spoiler: yeah baby she fuckin loves you surprise!!!!!!

- and oh god there’s a line in practical magic that had me spiraling at a canon reunion exchange of:

“So, why don’t you do what you do, and I’ll do what I do, and we’ll see where we end up.”

- it’s fully likely only the fantasy au will be the only one of these i post…so enjoy my brain worms but don’t get too excited 😫

5. Share one of your strengths.

capturing complex emotions in words. my therapist always tells me she’s going to steal my metaphors.

it’s just the only way i know how to express my emotions because the words that belong to them don’t feel like enough!!!

14. What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across?

oh also follow up from previous

the conflation of ‘write what you know’ with ‘write only what you’re familiar with’

am i familiar with the fucking mob???? nah man i am playing house with my barbie dolls.

but i know pain, i know sorrow, i know hope and wanting so desperately to be worthy of the life that you had no choice but to receive, to not want to waste it and setting yourself impossible standards that you can never live up to and spiraling when you inevitably don’t meet them.

write things that are new to you. that’s why research exists.

#ask game #these are all very good questions i agree

[backhurtyy]

I have not watched any space battles in the past like 2 days but I will continue it tomorrow and I hope my billion asks of nonsense went through, esp the one about Anakin being space fantasy Jesus?? I only have 4 left. I also wanted to ask what I should watch after the movies, since Obi the show is happening rn I wanna watch that to know what’s going on but idk if I’ll be confused. Rogue one and madalorian are on my list cause they’re popular, if there’s anything else that’s good or important lmk I know people like clone wars so it’s on my list too, if you have an order preference or something to add or anything lmk. However today I did go to a pride bowling thing to meet and talk to other trans people and while I didn’t do that, I did talk to some older lesbians who were really nice and I SAW other trans people and esp older gay and trans people which is. A blessing honestly. Anytime I see an older gay or trans person i want to hug them and cry. It was a lot of fun, we all sucked at bowling but it was awesome 😌 - 🤍

hihihi sorry i did get your other asks, i’ve just been eaten by work so i haven’t gotten around to answering them but i will after this one!!! also thank you for asking me what you should watch next. here is Nellie’s Complete Guide to the Best Star Wars Experience (under the cut because i can’t be succinct about star wars to save my life)

obi wan kenobi: you don’t need any context other than the prequels (episodes 1-3) to watch this. it is everything. they did my sad little desert hermit right and i am kissing deborah chow on the mouth.

the clone wars (animated show): okay so i have to say. watching the clone wars early on is actually HUGELY important because a lot of characters who are introduced in it are brought into other shows like the mandalorian and the book of boba fett and stuff, and if you haven’t watched it it’s a little confusing cause you’re like. well who tf are you??? when in clone wars they had a nineteen episode arc introducing them and stuff. that being said it is a lot to watch (seven seasons, lots of episodes…). but it’s seriously so good!!! like you get to see the individual things that led to anakins fall, ahsoka who is one of the best characters ever made, lots of obi wan angst, commander cody and captain rex and all the other clones who are just so wonderful and loveable, and just some really good stories. if you wanted you could also just start with some of the more important arcs (clone wars is set up in two to four episode arcs that act as sort of chapters in the larger book of the show if that makes sense) which i could give you a separate guide to lmao. but yeah tldr i recommend watching clone wars early on so that the star wars universe gets pulled together a little more.

star wars rebels (animated show): i can not emphasize my love for rebels more. in my honest opinion it is one of the best piecss of star wars media out there, and it is CRIMINALLY underrated. like yeah okay the animation style is a little weird but. the characters and their relationships more than make up for it. it’s about found family. it’s about love and compassion and hope. it’s about kanan and hera being the most loveable couple in the entire galaxy. it’s about zeb and ezra and sabine being siblings. it’s about rebellion and standing up for your home and learning to help others even when no one has helped you. just. it’s so good. i could go on for days. four seasons, twenty ish episodes in each, eleven out of ten stars from me.

rogue one: the best star wars movie ever made. i haven’t watched it in a long time but. good lord. it broke my heart in two and also patched it back together and kissed my forehead. i need to rewatch it desperately. you could really watch this at any point, you just need the context of the original trilogy.

the mandalorian: MY BELOVED. this is the show that really pulled me all the way into star wars a while back, because it’s just SO. GOOD. like din and grogu are everything and the story telling is so good and each episode just has such life to it and it’s just. it’s incredible (also pedro pascal is very hot as the mandalorian but that’s a separate conversation). quality wise it’s at the top of my list, but again i recommend watching it after at least some of clone wars, because i watched it before and didn’t understand some of what was happening. i’m rewatching it now after having watched most of star wars, and it makes a lot more sense lol.

the book of boba fett: confession i’ve only actually watched the first episode because i was waiting to watch it with my dad and we both got too busy, but the first episode slapped and also temeura morrison and ming na when are incredible so i know the rest of it should be good. the natural flow after finishing season two of the mandalorian is to watch book of boba fett, and i know from spoilers and stuff that it’ll make more sense with the clone wars and stuff beforehand.

here’s this guide to help w chronological order, though it doesn’t include tbobf (just slap it in after the mandalorian):

also that pride bowling sounds so fun!!!! i’m so glad it was fun and that you got that opportunity 💖💖💖 older gays make the community go round

#okay im scurrying over to your other asks before i have to get ready for work #but hopefully this rambling makes sense lmao #and if you want my opinions on the best/most important arcs in clone wars. i got you #my goal at some point is to do a full chronological rewatch (including clone wars because that’s not chronological lmfao) #it’s a tall order tho rip #but anyways yeah there you go #and then there’s all the books too—- damn it star wars why are you so massive #answered #🤍 anon

[lebretdonna]

A month has passed, the worst is over and I have waited long enough, I cried enough, I isolated myself enough, I drank to oblivion enough, I waited beside my phone dying for a text to save me from my misery enough, April is a new beginning, renewed my gym subscription, deleted every account I had permanently and made new ones, I am in the best shape I have ever had in years, my birthday is in 3 months, I have 3 months left to live my 21st year to the fullest, to start my 22nd year with a healed heart and be a new woman free from attachments, my friend is taking me to a bar next week and introducing me to his friends hopefully one of them is a lesbian lmao, I can now make moves on every man I was attracted to physically but rejected because of my naive loyalty when I am with or without him, lmao the second week apart I saw a man in the cafe he was so attractive I literally ran away from him once he sat next to me, I knew if we clicked I wouldn't get my hands off of him, his veiny neck and arms gave me chills, I wish I stayed because at the time I ran away from this potential he was out there having a date with the whore he got matching French hats for... Fucking liar told me he got me this grey one for me while wearing it with her why tf anyone would use someone's present? One for a photo and one for a date LMAOOOO present my ass fucking liar, imagine your bf of 5 years never posting a pic for any dates you ever had but ran to post the date he had with whore he just knew in 2 months and breaking up with you because of her and then posting a story having a glass of wine with her with the matching hats he got for her was I fucking stupid to tolerate this shit? And typing "home" beside her fucking name? One fucking hour from leaving me because of her???????? What the fuck? How tf did I bear seeing the man I love break up with me to hang out with the woman I hate? How tf did I let that slide and BEGGING HIM to forgive me for thinking badly of him after he fucking broke up with me once and blocked me to hang out with her and in the second time refusing to take me back so he can have 1-4 good months with her and like even if they didn't fuck my man choosing another woman over me and leaving me for months and spend time with her and the other whore instead is straightforward cheating how tf did I let it slide? Holy fuck now I relate to selena gomez's lyrics "in two months you replaced us like it was easy, made me think I deserved it in the thick of healing" in her song lose you to love me, I really have to hate him to love me, everyday goes by I hate him more and it gets more impossible to ever get back he keeps betraying me every fucking day, I was willing to save myself, my heart and my body for one man only for the rest of my life without ever feeling like I am missing out on something because to me love was enough but where has it led me? Depression, overdosing on sedatives daily, alcoholism and beyond... no more self-destruction for someone who never deserved me or loved me from the start and ended up betraying me and ghosting me, everytime I wrote down my hurt for losing someone it got easier, I wrote about 3 people in the past here and I moved on from them all and never looked back, this is the greatest loss of my life losing the love of my life but it was one sided so it feels like the biggest scam in my life, he knows my su*c*dal tendencies and he still left me at my worst and lived the best time of his life with my replacements non-bothered if I lived or died why would I care if he lived or died then? He's fucking dead to me and I wish him nothing but fucking agunish like everyday I suffered this month, 2 out of his 3 former exes cheated on him and that's exactly what he deserves because he's a cheating piece of shit just like them he never deserved my heart he deserves a whore like him like the fucking whore he's with everyday now the fucking desperate slut he chose over me he's fucking dead to me