#i feel most excited when i see them

[devilart2199-aibi]

Knight Optimus doodles 🗡

Rewatched the movies sometime ago, not crazy about the films, but I do like this design :3

#transformers last knight #optimus prime #basically just speedran the films to see when the bots appeared 😂 most characters a misses but the takes on their designs are pretty cool #you kinda have to separate them from the character and just look at them as a take on the franchise #i feel like characters when they appear in movies are sometimes a mash up of two characters rather than just staying true to one?? #i believe i saw that Yolopark will be making a model kit of him which I'm pretty excited for since i have the rotb bee one :> #aibi doodles

[carpisuns]

gaining a new interest/joining a new fandom is always kind of intimidating it feels like there’s so much you’ve missed out on by not enjoying this thing before so you’re like GRAHHHH got to catch up so I can have peak enjoyment like all the Enjoying This Thing experts around here! which is so silly bc if you enjoy a thing you’re already there but. yknow

#like when I got into hockey I was like studying all the rules and terms and players and team history and stuff #so I could be able to talk with other fans and understand everything #and like when I got into ml and owl house it was like ooh gotta binge watch all the eps #gotta see what the fandom vibes are and read the good kush fics and find a group of friends to brainrot with #and now w zelda it’s like #woof #there are so many games spanning decades!!! and I only have a switch so I can’t even play most of them lol #and the lore is fascinating but sometimes convoluted and confusing lol #bro the timeline. help #it’s just a lot of info and stuff to consume djdjdk #and im brainrotting so hard so part of me wants to find a loz discord server or soemthing l #but I feel like i would not be able to be on equal footing discussion wise bc I have only played a few of the games #it’s cool tho i have one irl friend who’s very excited abt me getting into her fav series haha #and I’m enjoying seeing people’s art and stuff #and making my little doodles #ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ <- me having a good little time being bad at gaming and obsessed with a tragic blond boy yet AGAIN #mine

[obihoe]

thinking abt this screenshot of madara looking down on tobirama after attempting to take out his hurt over izuna's death on him .. but tobirama cannot die, he cannot feel pain and izuna is dead anyway so its not enough

#posts #madara #sorry i feel like ive said this exact thing on some post already a while ago .. but i came across this picture again and it brought up #some thoughts #this scene's like the only instance during the entire war arc where we get to see him display any emotion #smth other than lust for battle or excitement etc #we can actually see that even for him as free of emotion as he comes off most of the time #there's quite an amount of hurt for him at the source of it too #mdr also kills sasuke after this. first tries to avenge izn's death but then goes and stabs a stand-in of his right thru the heart #and he looks so unhappy w this afterwards #cuz he feels like he Has to doesnt want to kill him but has to #we also see him remember hsrm's backstab and this time it is not a romantic memory #contrary to the first time when he talks abt him to the 5 kage #here u can see that it did hurt him and he remembers every single word hsrm said to him .. #repeats them to sasuke and then applies that same logic to him as well #hsrm had to kill him for the village so now mdr for his version of peace. has to do the same thing as well #kill his own kin as a sacrifice to achieve what he wants #but also sfdgesfdfsd #just this interaction here w tbrm alone .. its so dissatisfying for him cuz like he wants do SOMETHING abt his grief over losing his #brother. but he cant. he cant even fuck up and hurt his killer anymore over it #its too late #he shouldve done that earlier but couldnt and now its too late #just like everything else is too late for him too. no way back anymore no way to reverse anything thats happened

[crystalcanis]

I want to talk about my ocs publicly more like I used to years so... so freakin BAD!!!

#canischat #I remember back when I used to use twitter a lot (ew) I talked about oc facts randomly all the time! #and opened QnAs and requests of drawings of my ocs on my instagram stories #And people actually enjoyed it it was like my public excitement made others excited about my ocs in return #and I honestly owe like more than half my audience to that time #most people that stuck around to read my comics or are on my comic server are because #they came from back when I used to talk about my ocs all the time and they were curious to see it play out the way it was intended #what happened? idk. I guess I got self concious. But I want to recreate those vibes again. #I want to show others Im just as excited about my little guys as I was back then and as I wish for them to be too. #anyway uuh idk maybe I will reblog one of those oc questions for ppl to send me asks at some point #but I dont want to make it feel like Im forcing ppl to ask me things so I want to be able to just ramble at any time for ppl to enjoy too

[sysig]

Totally unaffected by this gesture of affection, definitely (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #The Captain #ZEX #Forgive the quality lol I wanted to make them pretty but then- Well you know lol #Dandelions <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 #You know it's bad when you start getting excited about the most mundane little signifiers <3 #Dandelions deserve way more love than they get anyway it all balances out #I just hghh it's such a simple setup but there's a lot of feelings that can be expanded upon! #Like would Zelnick know about dandelions cultural ties?? He grew up on Unzervalt - unless someone brought some with them! #Or explained it I guess - but also Unzervaltians seem like scrappy underdogs sprouting up in the sidewalk cracks to defy the Ur-Quan too #Feels like it would actually mean a lot to him if he knew their symbolism! #But even if he didn't - they're Earth Flora! A piece of his home that /should/ just be mundane and everyday and not a big deal but it is!! #I legit teared up at Zelnick appreciating a blue atmosphere ah <3 #He loves Earth so much wah <3 The naturalistic storytelling in his internal monologue are genuinely So Good #And then y'already know I love ZEX gifting him flowers lol I really do need to finish that one comic I posted the preview of it's cute! #Any little way that he engages with human courtship is The Cutest to me <3 Trying so hard to impress his love! #Trying so hard to cross that cultural gap agh it gets me bad! Seeing humans as more than just pretty somethings to be enjoyed at a distance #ZEX's pride also gets me bad hehe but I really love when he uses his intelligence to try to relate and understand #See humans as complex individuals both personally and in different cultures! He gets so distracted so easily hehe silly ♪ #Also I don't know if I have anywhere else that it'd come up but agh gods his and Zelnick's conversation about the eventual fallout of ZEX's #kidnap attempt - Literally The Best like ugh!! ♥ I /tried/ to write something half that exact and eloquent and it's just right there! Gah!! #S'beautiful s'so good fjdslafd I'm love I'm love

[opens-up-4-nobody]

The way that the sun hits leaves and clouds. I feel like I could watch the colors change forever. If I could slow down for that long.

#i keep forgetting a have a deck now. i can go outside and sit there #im doing that now. sitting in the corner of a deck full of empty chairs. staring up at a big pine tree where the sun is striking it gold #at the top. i like how thr light hits the needles. if the sky was black it would look like its on fire #theres a tree outside my bedroom window too. in the morning. after the sunrises it catches thr light and refelcts the most perfect shade #of green. the kind of green that flutters translucent like youre looking up from the bottom of a pool. the light the light its all about #the sun. everything everything is about the sun. when i start my project I'll be focused on understanding how organisms catch the light bc #its so incredible and complicated it would make my chest swell to bursting if there wasnt an empty bleeding wound in my gut. a #metaphorical wound of course. i dunno. its just difficult bc right now my mood is inflated by hormones. not even that much i think I'm #just at what shoulf be a normal level of happiness so i can be slow for a minute. but just a minute bc i kno it won't last long #sorry i cant shut the fuck up when im like this but i dunno i just feel like i havr to document these ephemeral moments before they're gone #its just difficult when you kno the world is so full of beautiful things but 95% of the time your eyes are too clouded to see it #everyone tells me i work too much but i feel like im just staring off into space being miserable 60% of the time. ive just done so much #damage over the past few years im coming into a new lab as damaged goods. ive got an albatross around my neck in thr form of data i #collected so self destructively that the idea of having anything to do with its publication makes me hate myself. everytime someone tells #me good job on collecting so so so much data it feels like they're congratulating me for breaking something within myself. like i slit my #wrists and bled out on a lab bench and theyre saying good job and theyre excited for me and i have to grin and bear it and pretend im #excited too. but im not bc ive burned everything inside me to ash. so when im elevated enough to be distracted by the clouds and trees it #feels like healing. like seeing angels. beautiful ephemeral beams of light. i wish i could slow down enough to watch them. but now thr sun #is hitting the horizon and the sky is going gradually dark and i should go inside. bc i have many things to do in the morning. so that's #what ill do. and ill try to get more thsn 6hrs of sleep but its hard when your body is vibrating over with energy #but at least i dont feel tired in the morning. something in my head must be on fire #unrelated #hm i should maybe add a tw to this #tw self injury #but its the kind thst makes u good at ur Job. its the kind ppl reward. so they don't understand when u say its destroying ur life #but im trying to get better. i say as i gear up for an insane semester lol but i do mean it

[mayclair]

the party going roadtrips would be so fucking chaotic but in like the best way

#lucas wouls drive bc he’s the ildest and the most responsible the standard is not high tho but he wins when they vote #max and mike would argue over who gets to call shotgun and everyone gets so fed up that el ends up being the one sitting there #then the two of them would find something else to argue over ie the aux and who gets the last fry until everyone yells at them to shut up #el is facinated by literally everything #will knows how excited she is so he finds the best places for her to see <3 <3 #he attempts to draw in the car and gives up after five minutes bc the bumps are annoying . whatever he draws is still better than all of #the rest of their artworks combined tho #dustin takes pictures of literally everythign bc he like el is also facinated by the not so giant ball of yarn on the side of the road #they stop for pee breaks eveyr hour bc when one of them needs to go the others won’t bc they don’t feel like it but half an hour later it’s #OH SHIT I NEED TO GO #lucas is So Fed Up #occassionally max and lucas will hold hands over the dashboard controls when she’s riding shorgun #and is usually followed by lots of loud booing sounds (mike and will) and awws (dustin and el) from the backseat #their trips would last like 1 - 2 weeks over summer break so half a month of eating nothing but greasy unhealthy food they enjoy it very mu #stranger things

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

the reason i’m not afraid of aging is because i want to be a hot middle-aged man who has a toxic yaoi relationship with another middle-aged man

#u know i used to be so afraid of aging until i realized that i want to be a dilf. now it’s kinda exciting #i realized recently that i could never picture myself living past my twenties until i pictured myself as a man #but like. i want to be a man and a woman and nothing and everything #but like. i’m cool with how i look now for the most part idk if i would want to transition physically at least not rn #and rn i still dress fem enough that everyone goes straight to she/her #and i like she/her but it hurts rn #bc some of my family has switched to they/them or it/its and it’s just so soothing #but family that knows i don’t like it still use she/her and phrases like ‘daughter’ or whatever even more often on purpose #and it hurts bc i don’t really feel the need to change the way i dress/look but i know everyone assumes she/her #when they see me in a dress or skirt. even w how very not-cis my fashion sense is #but also i fucking hate pants which is a separate thing (prob autism tbh) and even if i wore pants they’d still use she/her #thinking of changing my name to something very masc so i can confuse people enough that they’ll stop defaulting to she/her #and i haven’t told ppl outside my immediate family so idc if they use she/her but i’m fucking pissed when ppl in the family do it #anyways side note when i was 12 my ideal gender (b4 i knew about being non-cis) was a floating consciousness w no body #or a plastic-doll-like creation that’s smooth all over #… i still want to be a floating consciousness actually lmao. it would be great #back then i hated being a girl but i didn’t know there were more options and also i was socially isolated (didn’t leave home for like 2yrs) #and my mother was openly transphobic whenever the topic was brought up so that was my only real experience #but i didn’t really internalize it other than the fact that my mother would be rude if i ever happened to be not-cis and guess what? she is #anyways it’s like 2am and also i’m only awake bc i was captivated by a sugar daddy middle aged gay fic for a show i watched like 5 episodes #for 2 years ago #sorry for rambling in the middle of the night lol #gn y’all

[frecklystars]

god im so excited for the Barbie movie today. I might be a bit tense while seeing my triggers on screen but honestly I’ve been doing so so so well handling my ptsd the last few weeks and I'm very proud of myself!!!!!

there’s a few triggers I’ve been actively working on reclaiming and I KNOW I’m going to be okay watching the movie bc I am not letting anybody take this from me. I know I’m gonna wanna see it more than once. I even bought myself a cute pink skirt for it ;w;

#I’m gonna wear pink glitter in my hair too for opening night #woof #like i know im gonna be rly tense but i have been doing SO much better than i was just a month ago #if anything ill just be incredibly tense at first. but i genuinely think ill relax more as the movie progresses #bc ive been using grounding techniques for months and ive been working so goddamn hard to reclaim pink #WHICH IS SUCH HUGE PROGRESS FOR ME to think back to january when i couldnt look at pink at ALL #and i think seeing pink literally every single second for 2 hours straight in the barbie movie #is gonna also help my brain be like 'oh hey everything is fine' help it to become desensitized #bc ive been doing exposure therapy and im doing so much better than i was even just one month ago!!!!!!! #barbie is my girlfriend. and ken is my boyfriend. and i have two hands they can hold #god!!! you know how many barbies im gonna kiss!!!!! SO MANY #this is MY movie i have been so fucking excited to see!! its my number one favorite thing ive been looking forward to!!!! #i have wanted to see this! so! fucking! badly! and fuck anybody who tried to ruin that for me #i dont want ptsd to control my life #i feel like im riding a bull and gripping it by the horns while its trying to kick me off while im yelling Not Today Bitch #thats what trying to reclaim triggers feels like #but i can fucking feel it working i can feel myself getting better with some of these triggers i cant believe it #and i think just a year from now most of these triggers wont be severe anymore #which is my goal. i dont even need them to be cured completely i just want to function normally #cannot tell u how fucking unreal it is to have so many triggers that are like. normal everyday stuff #colors. clothes. phrases. transformers. im taking ALL of that shit back #STARTING WITH PINK ONE OF MY FAVORITE GODDAMN COLORS 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 #THE EMOJI LOOKS RED ON DESKTOP BUT THAT IS OKAY.

[oshiawaseni]

The unbreakable bond between two disconnected ends

While I do think that Deku is incredibly heroic, I also subscribe to the idea he loses himself the most and goes hardest specifically when it comes to Kacchan, I can’t see him motivated to this extent and acting what appears to be without limit for any other character and between us and Horikoshi knowing this little fact, it makes Bkdk so endearing and easy to rally behind.

A part of me feels that Kacchan sees all of Deku’s actions for him only as his reckless heroism, and that Deku would be like this for anyone… and this might be why they haven’t come to truly understand one another yet. Like is it really such a big coincidence that with the exception of Katsuki Bakugou Rising, Kacchan and Deku have never shown each other their heart and how strongly they feel for one another? Whether it’s simply batting in their corner to others or this deep emotional connection they have causing them stress and worry about the other, tirelessly wanting to get Deku back to the point of sleeplessness, even breakdowns and Deku’s quirk awakenings over Kacchan.

Hence Izuku’s shock with the apology and not accepting being called Izuku by him right away. That was surely because he doesn’t understand the scope of which Kacchan has fiercely worried over him and how that worry is now coming from a love for Izuku that’s probably always been resting inside him. 

But we all know that rather than plain and platonic heroism, that likewise, when it involves Kacchan, Deku’s own loud actions have been coming from a place in his heart occupied by this unchangeable pure love for him and also Deku’s complete inability to accept his own existence in the world without Kacchan somewhere within his reach. Think of “Give him back!” That was the stubborn side of Izuku that wouldn’t let Kacchan go to a place where he couldn’t see him, watch over him and confirm his existence that’s right in front of him. What incredible attachment he has always felt towards him, despite everything.

Izuku kept tabs on Kacchan to the point he knows when he last spoke to him. To Deku, it didn’t matter what Kacchan was doing, as long as he could ascertain his presence nearby and that he’s okay, even if they weren’t necessarily on friendly terms. And Kacchan very much felt the same thing about Deku. “Watch me, Deku.” Watch how strong and cool of a hero I am, watch my back with those big eyes of yours and praise me like you always do. But when he realised Izuku was no longer in his reach, Kacchan fought in earnest for a chance to get him back again, to not just trailing behind him but by his side. Which is why their distance being removed and them communicating like best friends again is such a big deal and would absolutely mean the world to both of them.

I’ve always had a vague sense that Kacchan had been running away from Deku. Which side of Deku had Kacchan been running away from all this time? Heroism? Love? Both? Because Deku’s heart scared him. He didn’t just envy it or feel inferior to it - he also feared it. To me, Kacchan rejecting Deku’s kindness feels like someone saying no to a warm hug from somebody they care about on a freezing winter’s day.  It made no sense. He pushes affection away so much to the point that he’s virtually touch starved now. So why did he really do it? It’s one of Decchan’s mysteries that I wish was explained fully.

And on the other side of things, Deku’s actions towards Kacchan felt more and more nonsensical as the story unfolded. There’s this confounding enigma that despite Kacchan treating Deku awfully for years, Deku has consistently always jumped very strongly to Kacchan’s defense - which makes you wonder what it is about them that allowed Deku to carry his four year old self’s pure and positive feelings towards Kacchan for so long. (This is why middle schooler bkdk is top tier dj for me, they often come up with their own answer to fill the gaping hole of missing context in this complicated bkdk puzzle.) And while I can’t consolidate in my head the truth to the mystery of their past that became such a complicated relationship in its current state (at least not a truth that belongs in a shounen… unless..? haha), I do know that Kacchan is now acutely aware of the fact this entire time he has been loved, not looked down on, by Deku and realised when Deku almost died that he also possesses feelings of love and attachment towards Deku too.

This revelation honestly affected him in a big way. It broke Kacchan’s hardened walls down piece by piece over time, until there was quite literally nothing left but his own exposed heart that he plainly laid out for Izuku.

The shot of the wound from his sacrifice that reopened - bleeding, vulnerable. A beautiful metaphor for his exposed heart and truth that he openly gives to Izuku for the first time in front of everybody. Because he realised Izuku is more important to him than his guilt and his shame and his pride. 

And because they are such an iconic and invincible duo who above anything else, want to take care of each other, this does have me hoping Izuku will take his vulnerable heart and treat it gently at the end of everything, shounen or not.

But as of now, we’re at an emotional stand-still from Izuku’s side.

Kacchan’s words aged very well, past hundreds of chapters because despite being the protag of the story, we are always left wondering how Deku really feels. Kacchan’s frustration at Deku and characterisation of him here is so accurate lately 😅

I get the sense that all of this ambiguity they feel from the other has been written there for a reason and will have a meaningful climax where they will come to understand each other in the coming fight. Horikoshi places purpose behind all of the dialogue he writes - so with the dialogue between Deku and Toga in mind, when it comes to Izuku and Kacchan’s history and both not being fully aware of how much they care for one another, I think in the near future, they will acknowledge the inspiration and strength they’ve found in each other. “Don’t you also want to share the same heart?” Kacchan has been doing this with Izuku ever since DvK2 and we all know Izuku draws his own powers from Kacchan since the very beginning because he sees Kacchan not only as his personal hero, but as the embodiment of strength and confidence and overcoming one’s hardships. He watched him for years win against his biggest one of all: himself.

Because it’s not only All Might he’s been wanting to become more like, but someone else even closer to him. Someone who, without fail, has always motivated him to go beyond, above himself and even all logic and reason. And that someone has always been Kacchan. Ever since they were little. So now I am hoping they come to understand what’s inside each other’s hearts (especially Deku’s which is always shrouded in mystery.)

They understand each other’s strategies perfectly, and yet Izuku and Kacchan have always had this big gap whenever it came to knowing their true feelings. So as an answer to their disconnect over the years, an answer to their relationship which contains a mysterious and profoundly deep bond that leaves us wishing their gap to close even more, it makes sense that a moment will come to pass where they’ll really see and understand each other for the first time, without all of this evasiveness we’ve gotten used to.

#bakudeku #kana writes #bnha meta #op #Kacchan needs an answer to put his heart at ease we are missing Deku’s true feelings as always #as fanficy as it sounds thats whats happened and needs to happen to placate this #gaping hole in their relationship that you can see Kacchan wants to be filled with Izuku #the person Deku has taken the most inspiration from is probably Kacchan so it’s quite funny he only mentions all might #when Kacchan’s bright hopeful eyes gave him hope and dreams too #horikoshi you are going to have to address this sooner or later sir 😅 #long post #(again sorry) XD' #also how this manifests is uncertain but maybe it has something to do with AFO/OFA #i like the idea of a metaphysical connection #because these guys are so bad at communicating to each other their feelings lol #something that will force them to communicate would be nice #im excited for 2 things: 2nd's power and bkdk getting closer lol #🙏❤️ it’s a very sad time on social media lately so I’m sending my prayers

[quatregats]

Finals are nigh I am thinking about the Solomon a Gaenor fic again time is a circle

#honestly it's because when i was first thinking about it in december i made the most banger playlist for it #and i have been listening to that again as Comforting Background Music and hence thinking about it #i should write down the names of their five children in the doc before i actually forget them #i don't think i'm going to write it but it is a good excuse to push me to think about welsh and wales more often #and who knows. i think it would make a great messy soap opera 100k word unfinished fic on ye olde ao3 #perce rambles #also on a different note i reread what i have of the stephen doing top surgery on hornblower fic and i'm upset at how good it is #why do they all sound in character why does it actually have a functional plot who wrote this #now i need to insert The Navy's Most Intense Game Of Piquet: Trans Feelings Edition™ and also several more scenes but aaaaaa #very very excited for when that sees the light of day (probably won't be for like another year lol. there's a reason why it's cohesive) #anyways here's your silly fic update. also doing the stephen/jack famous flower of serving men but that one's cooking slowly too. we'll see

[carpisuns]

i love your art! it always brings a smile to my face <3

oh this is so kind 🥺🥺🥺 thank you so much!!

#this was so nice bc I have been really struggling with my art lately #and it’s been hard to make things turn out the way I want and I keep getting frustrated and not liking it #so yeah this is just nice to hear<3 #also it’s just. idk when people say this to me I’m like ??? really ?? 🥺 #cause there are so many really cool art styles/artists out there and my stuff to me is not very standout #I mean I have a good time making things and I’m glad other people like the things I make #I just assume it’s like ‘oh yay my blorbo!!’ rather than like my style specifically haha #which is fine!! like obviously I love my blorbos and I get excited seeing them djdjdj #and I don’t necessarily feel *bad* about having an art style that is less flavorful than others #I like my style (usually haha) #but still it just makes me like !! when someone like my art specifically idk! #it feels special to me #like if the style is nothing to write home about and some people still write home about it djjdd im jusf<3 Aw thanks for including me. #thanks for thinking of me #it’s meaningful to me to know I hold space in people’s thoughts #anyway I’m glad I could make u smile anon 🥺 this made ME smile #and sorry for the uncomfortable tag rambling I’ve been weirdly emotional the past few days most like due to shark week #werewolf time if you will #lmao #anon #ask #nice things

[crescentfool]

i think something that is important to me to remember is that there are small ways i can do things to spark joy for myself and others without waiting for someone else to do it... (conjures up little sparklies from my hands) life is so whimsical!!!

#lizzy speaks #for full transparency i cannot make sparklies emit from my hands unfortunately #but i can imagine that i can and i think thats cool i'm like a swaggy little magician #anyways sometimes i see announcements for games and im like #ok! cool! some people are very excited and happy. so awesome!! happy for them!!! #but personally i think i've found much more joy in doing my own thing #and it's ok if you're not particularly enthused about a new thingy because sometimes you still have other things you can do #or you have other things that feel much more gratifying to you. and thats ok!!! #this is a vague toward reload and splat3 (specifically splatfests) #it's become clear 2 me that reload is curating a different experience for pee 3 with the new mechanics they introduce #and i didn't realize how attached i was to how fes's mechanics (tiredness + fusion spells) can inform's one characterization of kitaro #until i kept seeing the new things for reload. still interested in reload's alternate interpretations but wont be following the news closel #and for splatfest. turf is not my favorite mode in splat by a long shot' but at least i can salmon with friends! or play another game #i think it's always important for me to remember that not everything will be for me and that's a good thing #when i see things that dont excite me as much. it reminds me about what i care about the most and to remember to hold those things close #i can make my own fun with my own little creations i don't need to wait for games to host events for me i can just draw silly little guys #or i can choose to make silly little clownery happen on my own terms and i think thats neat #even if i'm not hyped about something that others are hyped about that's okay because i'm nourishing myself and that's really fucking cool #and hey maybe i will find the joy in those things eventually. or not! and thats ok. who knows!! anything can happen!! #anyway if you read all of this thank you :3 and i hope that you will always be able to find your way to find something that excites you

[cruelsister-moved2]

i just honestly just hope those people on the submarine were dead all along like the handwringing is tedious & that amount of money and resources should never have been devoted to going down there & shouldn’t be devoted to saving them either but i just cant think of anything worse than being trapped in there for days & days waiting to die literally horrifying and unthinkable i hope they died instantly

#i dont like to moralise death bc i think its tempting and unhealthy to see death as a divine punishment or whatever #when most of the time people whose death would relieve suffering are the ones who die the least #but also insane to be trying to exact sympathy for everyone for the deaths of privileged strangers #like their families can be sad they died. the public doesnt owe them grief #somethign so unsettling about the people who like demand that everyone around them feels #bad about it....weirdddd #like how many migrant workers and refugees died this week #do you feel grief for them too? #this illusion that you grieve for everyone is so stupid you cant just feel bad for ppl who had the most exciting deaths

[fruitsyrups]

ive crossed over into an alternate dimension where side profiles are somehow sometimes easier to draw than other angles. bodies in side profile however... nooo thank you...

#ok the back of the head is hard but the facial features proportions kind of feel easier to figure out . maybe. #weird #n e way im happy with the way i draw faces mostly maybe 50 percent of the time but im so not caught up on drawing bodies #like to the point it just looks bizarre #decent proportional face with like at least some understanding of structure/form even if it's not much #and then the stiffest clunkiest body you ever did see #or i can go the other way around and have an ok body. like decently fluid / proportional. but no face #theres some kind of disconnect. cant have both at once #thats only a sometimes thing though anyways. faces are generally easier #tried to do a teeny bit of gesture drawing yesterday but i was feeling sooo lazy and impatient so only 3 of them turned out ok ish #im pretty sure i post more often talking about art than i actually post art #i dont post most of the things i draw #i like to have my little secrets... #secrets in question are just literally anything that isnt adventure time art #actually looking through my art folder is crazy cause like if i saw this 3 years ago (i was really bad at drawing 3 years ago) i would. idk #drop dead or something #but now its like yeah same old same old. lots of problems. need to work on those. #but its nice to step back and be like woagh holy shit. massive improvement #earlier i was trying to dfraw a character and it wasn't coming out right but instead of getting frustrated and discouraged #it was more like i had this feeling of . idk. excitement to get better at drawing? #i dont know if this is just a temporary mood or maybe im turning over a new leaf. new optimistic mindset about art #<- watch that 'new mindset' totally disappear when i have a slightly more prolonged period of art struggle. lol

[autismcupcake]

#I know we haven't been online much today. tumblr has been showing us triggering ads. but something very unfortunate has happened. #and I can't do anything about it. I can't fix it for Tommy. There's nothing that can be done about it. #and it's really silly. let's be honest it's silly. but it's really hurting it. #I don't really wanna explain that much but essentially it made a character it was super excited about right? #aaaaaaaaand just a few minutes ago it found out someone already made a character by that name with the same core trait. #not only that but their character is very popular. So now Tommy feels like it either has to dramatically change the character or #just never post about them. Which fucking sucks. #especially because it already changed this character's name once because it saw that the original name was already used several times. #and it got really attached to the second one partially because of that but partially because it thought this name was much cuter. #and there's nothing we can do about any of this. I think it hurts especially because its character had become very comforting. #the other person's character also had a very similar disability which we also have so Tommy gave its character. #so that as you can imagine is making the entire thing worse especially because it's a pretty uncommon disability. #I know most of our followers are not systems but it can be hard to not be able to fix things when that feels like the only reason you exist. #we'll get to see our puppy soon at least. That has to cheer it up at least a little.