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#just like everything else is too late for him too. no way back anymore no way to reverse anything thats happened
quin-ns · 2 days
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The blue (JJ Maybank x Reader)
Series summary: JJ has a secret, and he doesn’t know how much longer he can hold onto it. He discovers his breaking point when his best friend starts to show interest in you, his step sister, who he’s already fallen hard for
Series tags: step brother!jj, dual pov, jealousy, one sided john b x reader, drinking, inappropriate relationship, public sex, oral sex (f receiving)
A/N: first series I’ve finished and I could not be more excited to share! please read the tags and if the subject matter is uncomfortable to you, you do not have to read. this one is a wild ride guys, I can’t wait for you to see what I have in store 🫶
Series masterlist + OBX masterlist
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JJ didn’t really understand how this happened, but it did. When he tried to trace it all back, there wasn’t really one big moment. Just a bunch of small individual moments that amounted to… this. This feeling. This thing that kept him up at night that he couldn’t seem to get rid of.
He’d never been in love before, so it took JJ awhile to realize that’s what he felt for you.
Or maybe it was the denial. The moral part of his brain telling him it wasn’t normal. Your mom was married to his dad, so according to everyone else’s rules that made you his step sister—even if he didn’t think about you in that context anymore.
He used to, when you both were younger, before your mom got arrested. A large part of why JJ was so happy when you came into his life was because his dad eased up on him, finding some semblance of happiness with your mom.
But she wasn’t exactly perfect. To be with his dad, JJ always wondered what was wrong. As it would turn out, she had serious issues, but what they got her for was being a tax cheat. It added up how they could’ve met after that.
It was getting to be around… what, a little over a year since that happened? JJ couldn’t really keep track of the months, and you never liked to talk about it.
As much as JJ loved his father, he knew he wasn’t a good guy, even if he wanted him to be. So it surprised him when his dad still let you stay with them, but you’d been around since you were both about thirteen, so even if his dad didn’t think of himself as responsible for you (or even JJ), he at least cared enough to not throw you to the street.
That was about the same JJ got from him, and recognizing that is what brought you closer to him.
Sure, you’d been sort of close growing up, but not really. You mostly spent time with your mom and your own friends. Then, when everything went down, you lost your mom and your friends followed not long after. He saw the puffiness in your eyes when you’d come home and go to your room for the whole night. No one to hang out with after school and nowhere to go on a Saturday night. They had ditched you, apparently deciding that mocking you was more important than being there for you. It made his stomach hurt to see you in such a state. You didn’t smile for days.
So JJ, being the good step brother that he was, stepped in. He took you under his wing and brought your smile back.
You fit in well with his friends, easily becoming a part of the group. They liked having you around, and JJ felt like he got to know you in a way he hadn’t ever before.
It was selfish, but you made being at home easier. You kept him company when he stayed up too late and made sure to wake him up in the morning so he wouldn’t be late to work whatever odd job he had at the time.
Whenever his dad hit him, which started again not long after your mom was locked up, you were there to take care of him.
You were so sweet with him, eyes full of care and touches gentle as you cleaned his cuts or iced his bruises. It made it hurt less.
After one night, when his dad hit him, leaving a cut from one of his rings on JJ’s face, you came to his aid as you frequently did. His dad stormed out, so it was just the two of you as you cleaned his face. You had him sit on the couch and stood over him, one hand holding his face while the other held a cloth to make sure the cut was clean.
As JJ stared up at you, your frustrated words about his father falling on deaf ears, one jarring thought crossed his mind.
You should kiss her.
He’d immediately stood up, snapping himself out of whatever daze he was in, and went to his room. You’d tried to talk to him, but he brushed you off and said he was tired. When he asked to be left alone, which was rare, you did.
He didn’t sleep most of the night, staring up at his ceiling wondering where that thought had even come from. He’d never had it before, but from that moment on, JJ started to become much more aware of everything you did—everything you did for him.
Of course his friends loved him and cared about him, and he did the same for them, but with you, something about it just felt different. You were by his side nearly every moment of the day. You saw things they didn’t, and you were there when they couldn’t be.
You became everything to JJ. There was no other way to put it.
That was a couple months ago, and since then, his realization had morphed into something far more.
JJ was deeply, madly in love with you, which was not something a guy should be with his step sister, but he was. He didn’t really deal with it, just shoved it down and tried to ignore it. It was hard, especially when he was around you every single day, but JJ had done his best.
JJ would catch himself staring at you more than he’d admit, but no one seemed to notice. No one would suspect what he was thinking anyway. He made excuses to touch you, like a hand on your back when moving past you to get something or draping his arm over your shoulder and leaning on you jokingly. The latter made you laugh, and he’d join you, but he’d still feel a loss when you playfully nudged him away and told him you weren’t an armrest.
Sometimes, when he didn’t care how pathetic it was, he’d let himself drink too much, just so he could lean on you when you’d help him inside. When he pulled that stunt, sometimes he’d get lucky and you’d even stay by his side to make sure he went to sleep comfortably. And of course, whenever his dad struck, fists full of misplaced rage, you were there, easing the pain.
JJ resolved to take what he could get, and eventually he’d move on.
At least, he hoped that’s how it would go. Maybe he’d get lucky and—
“Hello?” You waved a hand in front of JJ’s face. “I’m talking to you.”
JJ blinked. He looked at you, zoning back in. In an instant, he remembered what was going on. You and him, along with his three best friends, were all on the beach. The others were in the water, while you had been sunbathing on shore and JJ… well, he’d just been sitting by you, wanting to be in your proximity (and sometimes steal glances when he couldn’t help himself).
But now you were on your feet, leaning down as you dropped your hand. JJ’s eyes fell from your face to your chest, and he swallowed when he caught a glimpse down your bikini top.
His eyes flicked back to your face. Was that too obvious? He hoped not.
“Sorry, what?”
You gave him a confused look, but laughed and straightened up.
“Do you wanna get in?”
He knew you meant the water, and in the distance he saw his friends waving for the two of you to join them.
JJ shook his head, and the action felt as if it were in slow motion. Kind of like when he was high, but much less carefree.
“Um, maybe in a bit.”
If he got too distracted he’d probably drown in the ocean—if the guilt of keeping his secret from you didn’t do it first.
You shrugged, not able to read him the way you usually could.
“If you’re scared, there might be some floaties somewhere,” you teased as you turned your back, heading for the water.
JJ couldn’t formulate a comeback, too focused on the swing on your hips as you walked away from him.
He squeezed his eyes shut and swallowed again, questioning his own self what was wrong with him. He’s never experienced such a desperate feeling before. What were you doing to him?
When he opened his eyes, you were in the water, and he had no answers.
He tried to focus on the sand, the water, the sky—anything but you. He even tried to look at Kiara just to see if it would work, but his eyes always drifted back to you, the ache in his chest growing with each passing minute.
JJ didn’t think much of it when he saw Kiara suddenly haul herself up onto Pope’s shoulders, but he felt like he got kicked in the stomach when you climbed onto John B’s.
John B’s arms locked around your legs, the two of you laughing loudly as you steadied yourself. JJ could hear it from shore—you weren’t that far out. JJ knew he was focusing far more than necessary because he saw the way your hands brushed John B’s hair out of his face as he tilted his head back to look up at you.
Even from where he was, JJ could see how you smiled down at John B. It was innocent and friendly, and it made him incredibly jealous.
You and Kiara started to go at it, trying to knock the other into the water.
JJ didn’t think anyone noticed when he stood and walked down to the edge of the sand.
“You’re going down!” Kiara shouted, her hands interlocked with and pushing against yours as you both refused to budge.
You laughed loudly. It was like music.
It took one exchanged look from you and John B to formulate a plan. It was the kind of silent communication that JJ thought you reserved for him.
You let Kiara lean a lot of weight on you, and that’s where your advantage was. In an instant, you relaxed your grip and John B stepped to the side. The other girl, and Pope beneath her, wobbled. It was over in a second. The two shouted right before they crashed down into the water.
“Ha!” you exclaimed, raising your hands in the air while John B whooped and hollered in celebration.
Kiara and Pope emerged, both rolling their eyes. It was their turn to share a look, and as JJ waded into the water, he figured out their plan.
With the two of them jumping at John B, it was easy to knock him off his feet. JJ’s eyes went a little wide when you fell into the water with a crash.
“Did you see that?” Kiara yelled with a grin when she spotted JJ.
“Kinda hard to miss,” he responded, looking around the water. It had been a few seconds and you had yet to reappear.
“They’re just messing with us,” Pope commented on your and John B’s absence, but his words started to sound less sure by the end.
Another long beat of silence passed. The waves grew still.
“This isn’t funny anymore!” Kie shouted.
JJ felt a twinge of panic, awful scenarios flashing through his head. It didn’t matter how unlikely they were.
Suddenly, water erupted. John B arose with a splash, with you clinging to his back. He roared dramatically while shoving water towards Kie and Pope. They screamed as the waves hit them, trying and failing to shield themselves.
“Revenge!” you yelled in a maniacal manner, chin on John B’s shoulder.
“Truce! Truce!” Kie and Pope both yelled, spitting out saltwater.
John B paused, and JJ noticed how close his face was to yours when he turned his head.
“Should we forgive them?” John B deferred to you.
You hummed thoughtfully. “I think they learned their lesson,” you decided. Your gaze, which had been focused on John B, shifted past him. “Hey, look who made it!”
JJ realized you were talking to him. He forced a smile, smothering the jealousy he felt at seeing you and John B in the position you were in. It seemed weirdly close for you two. You and John B weren’t usually touchy-feely-piggyback-ride friends.
John B seemed to pick up on JJ’s shift in demeanor, because his smile was a little more contained as he said, “Hey, man.”
JJ figured his friend didn’t get that he was jealous, which was for the best. Everyone knew JJ was protective over you, and John B probably thought JJ was questioning his intentions as your brother. Why would it be anything else?
“Nice victory,” JJ replied, having nothing better to say. He didn’t even grit his teeth, so he counted that as a win for himself.
Tension eased as you all decided to just chat and relax in the water until the sun set.
Although, JJ kept an eye on John B, noticing how his friend kept an eye on you.
When it got dark and you all began to head back to the shore, JJ found himself at your side. Your steps fell in line with his as you looked up.
“You feeling okay?” you asked lightly. You must’ve sensed his attitude shift, even if it was subtle. “You’ve been quieter than usual.”
JJ couldn’t help the urge to smile at how well you knew him.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he lied, not wanting to concern you. He liked when you worried about him, but this was the one time when he didn’t want you pressing for him to open up. “Are you?”
JJ reached to ruffle your damp hair. You swatted his hand away before he could do any real damage.
“Very funny,” you grumbled. Your expression shifted to a smile, then softened. There was something careful about it. “If something was up, you’d tell me, right?”
JJ swallowed, trying to avoid the way your eyes searched his. He had to look forward before he could answer.
“Yeah, of course,” he assured.
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JJ didn’t remember falling asleep on the couch, but he remembered everyone sitting around the living room.
Wait, no. That wasn’t right.
The porch. Everyone has been sitting on the porch, drinking and laughing together. He recalled cramming himself into a chair next to you, playing it off like a joke. Everyone had laughed, and he got to be close to you, so it worked out.
He also remembered following Kiara and Pope inside, expecting you to be behind him.
Everything clicked.
You and John B had elected to stay outside, and JJ had been sitting on the couch, watching through the window, trying to make out what you were saying through the small opening where the window was cracked for the nighttime breeze.
He must’ve dozed off while waiting for you. That didn’t sound like him—he would’ve been focused on watching you, making sure you made it in. Maybe he had been worn out or you stayed up way too late, or both.
JJ blinked a few times. He was just concerned for your safety, like always. Fenced in porches with lights and his best friend keeping you company could be dangerous…
Yeah, he didn’t even buy that.
It was easier back when JJ believed his own lies and self justifications.
Sitting up, JJ peered out the window. It was the early hours of the morning, right around when it was still dark but you could just tell the sun was about to begin rising. His heart sped up when he found you missing from your chair. You weren’t in any of the other chairs in his view, either.
He stood up, feeling more awake than ever, and went right for the door. He didn’t care about waking anyone inside up.
“Jeez, man,” John B said suddenly, sounding surprised as he looked at him. JJ had just barged out onto the porch out of nowhere. “You good?”
JJ took a second to observe his friend. He half-sitting and half-laying back on the couch against the wall, which made sense because he’d been sitting there before. From inside, JJ couldn’t see him, but he didn’t even think about John B’s whereabouts until he stepped out.
Maybe he was a bad friend for that.
He didn’t feel that guilty, though, because he saw where you were; sleeping on John B with your head on his thigh. You were curled up on your side, facing away from his body, and JJ could see how steadily you were breathing.
JJ looked back at his friend, ready to lash out, but the word ‘irrational’ popped up in his mind and resisted. Just from the scene in front of him, it’s not like he had anything to be mad about.
Jealous, maybe, but not mad. But he couldn’t act on that feeling either. If he acted jealous, that would invite too many questions that JJ didn’t have a good answer for.
“Fine just…” He ran a hand through his hair and then shook his head. “You guys good?”
John B furrowed his brows a little, but chuckled.
“Yeah, we’re fine. We were just talking and she started to fall asleep and I just let her. She seemed tired and it wasn’t a big deal so...”
“What were you guys talking about?”
“I don’t know, stuff?”
JJ leaned back in the doorway. “Like what, though?”
John B tilted his head a little, shaking it ever so slightly.
“Just… life and stuff. Does it matter?”
“I guess not,” JJ replied, giving the appropriate answer. He looked down at you, noticing you hadn’t stirred. You looked comfortable, and that was very conflicting. All of this was. It made his head hurt. “Has she been asleep long?”
John B met JJ’s eyes when he looked back up from you.
“You sure you’re okay?” John B asked, sounding almost concerned. Or at least confused. Maybe both.
But the answer was no. No he wasn’t.
“Yeah, man,” JJ answered with a shrug. “She probably won’t wake up if you wanna get up and go get some sleep.”
John B looked down at you, then at JJ.
He slowly started to move, being extra careful with your head, making sure to put a cushion beneath you before standing up straight.
John B gave a light, awkward smile to JJ as he neared him. He brushed past to go through the door, turning to face JJ.
“You coming?”
“Actually, I think I’m gonna sleep out here,” JJ answered, fighting the urge to look at you. He gave a shrug instead and said, “It’s nice out and I can’t get comfortable on the couch anyway. You can have it—plus I think Kie’s in your bed, so…”
“Right…” John B agreed slowly, glancing at you on the couch again. “You know nothing happened, right?” He looked back at JJ. “We were just talking.”
JJ wasn’t expecting something so direct. “It’s cool man, I know,” he found himself replying. “We’re good.”
John B nodded, albeit slowly. He entered the dark house, and JJ shut the door behind him. As a courtesy.
He then turned, spotted the comfiest chair, and resolved to sleep in that for the night. You had stretched out on the couch and looked too peaceful to disturb, even if he did want to take John B’s place from before.
It worked out perfectly, because it gave him a clear view of you as he decided to let himself go back to sleep.
As his eyes closed, he wondered if John B would peek through the window just as he had.
If he did, he’d see the content smile on JJ’s face as he drifted off to sleep. For yet another night, JJ got you all to himself. He didn’t want it any other way. He wasn’t sure what he would do.
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afterdarkprincess · 21 hours
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fuck it if i can’t have him
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Pairing: Sami/Jey Rating: Mature Word Count: 1,514
how dare you think it's romantic leaving me safe and stranded? Cause fuck it I was in love...
Part 2 in a series I'm calling "i love you (it's ruining my life)" Read part 1 here or this part can stand alone!
AO3 Link
Set between Elimination Chamber 2023 and Wrestlemania 2023
tag squad: @jeysbvck @harmshake @southerngirl41 @imabillyami @elementaldoughnut12 and @feelschicken
this fic is still running with inspo from @motherknuckers much appreciated!!
---
The sound of weights hitting the floor echos in the empty hotel gym and Jey pants with exertion, sweat dripping down his face.
It’s late, way later than he should be awake- they have a flight early tomorrow morning and his brothers won’t be kind in waking him up in a few hours. But he just couldn’t fall asleep, finally giving up and heading down to the gym. It’s technically not supposed to be open this late, but Paul has a way of working these requests into their hotel reservations, just in case.
The last few weeks have been tense after his disappearing act after the Royal Rumble. He was welcomed back after proving his loyalty by kicking Sami, but things haven’t been the same. Maybe the problem is him, the discomfort he feels within himself projected onto his cousin and brothers, but the vibes have been different.
When he thinks about everything that’s happened since the beginning of the year, looking at everything that’s gone wrong and how it all fell apart.
How close he and Sami had been to… something. Something that scared and excited him in equal measure.
He’d made his choices, sure. That superkick at the end of Raw was as clear a message as he could send. How could he have done anything else? Roman was going to take it out on Jimmy if he didn’t come back, hell he could have taken it out on Solo if he wanted to. The thought of his brothers suffering on his behalf is unbearable to him.
But at the same time, losing Sami has hurt more than he cares to acknowledge most days. He feels like he’s lost a limb, on unequal footing as he goes about his days. It’s too quiet without his constant presence, there are times he sees something funny on his phone and turns to show Sami but he’s just not there.
It reminds him of how he felt as a child when he and Jimmy were separated, the bone deep wrong that they had to learn to get over as they got older and had separate lives.
Jey wipes away the sweat from his face and tries to breathe, slow and steady like he’s been practicing.
It’s not fair. Nothing about his life has been fair since Roman established dominance in his life, you’d think he’d be used to it by now. But something about this last indignity, he just can’t seem to get over it.
Why couldn’t Roman just accept Sami into the fold? Hadn’t he proved himself over and over again over months, he’d beat Kevin for them at Wargames for them, that had been enough for him. Why did Roman have to push it to such extremes?
Sami choosing Kevin over him, over the family, over Roman. It hurt like hell, but Jey could understand that there wasn’t another choice for Sami to make. Sami wouldn’t be Sami if he had chosen to batter a tied up Kevin Owens. That innate goodness that permeated his soul, the light that made him put up with months of abuse from Jey, keeping the faith on whatever it was he saw in him.
Jey’s not sure what that even was anymore. He had no problem beating up Kevin Owens or anyone else Roman pointed at, whether they deserved it or not. Anything resembling a sense of justice had been beaten out of him by the Tribal Chief ages ago.
He couldn’t do it to Sami. Not at the Rumble. Not at Elimination Chamber. Not until it was clear that Roman would force him to make an impossible choice between his brother and Sami. The man he…
He picks up a barbell, starts a set of reps to keep his mind from the obvious ending of that sentence. The feelings that just rub salt into his wounds, adding insult to injury.
Not that it matters now. Even if Sami had thought of him like that, it hadn’t been enough for him to choose to stay, even if Jey had been brave and selfish enough to ask that of him, if there had even been a chance. Roman took that away from them both.
He finishes a set, and the song playing in his earbuds ends, starting another track thats both familiar and new. Jey fishes his phone out of his pocket and checks the screen, confirming his suspicion.
It’s a new song by an artist he and Sami had bonded over, they’d talked about it when it had been teased on twitter, excited about it. He’d completely forgotten in all the turmoil. It feels like a knife in the heart now.
However, he doesn’t stop himself from hitting share and copying the link into a new message to Sami and hitting send before he can even think about it.
It’s late as hell, no way Sami’s going to see that message until the morning. And what’s he supposed to say now? After the way he attacked Sami the last time they saw each other, he can’t exactly just act like nothing happened.
He stares at the screen, hovering his thumbs over the empty message field. Can’t say nothing either. Fuck.
thought you’d wanna see it- sent 2:30am
Somehow that sounds worse. Desperate. Clingy.
Jey swaps back to his spotify feed and changes the song before shoving his phone back in his pocket.
Maybe it’d be better if he never met Sami at all. Or at least if Sami had never attempted to join his family. He’d known Sami for a long time now that he thinks about it, he’d been around backstage for years, and they’d done spots together over the years here and there. Truthfully he hadn’t payed him much mind for most of that time.
It wasn’t until he approached Roman that it all started. The disgust he felt watching someone beg for the opportunity he’d been beaten into. Sure he could see the appeal of trying to get into the most decorated faction in WWE, but could it really be worth it? Even with the belts on his shoulders he wasn’t sure.
At least before then Jey didn’t have this foolish hope, didn’t know how it felt to be safe and secure with his family and have someone to commiserate with, some of that burden off of his shoulders. They’d been so damn happy. Or at least he had been. Maybe Sami had deceived him. Maybe-
The burn in his forearm alerts him that he’s pushed himself too far, setting down the weight and groaning.
Between the aching twinge in his arm and the far deeper ache in his chest, he finds his eyes stinging with tears.
“Fuck- FUCK!” He screams, the sound echoing around him.
How is this the right answer? Feeling miserable, unable to sleep, down bad and crying at the gym over Sami fucking Zayn.
He lays back on the weight bench, stares up at the ceiling and just lets all the shit he’s been pushing down wash over him. Tears flow freely down the sides of his face, anger at Roman, jealousy over Sami picking Kevin fucking Owens, disappointment in himself at letting it get this bad, that bitter feeling wishing he could change the course of the last 3 months so he could just be happy with Sami again.
Fuck.
Fuck it, he was in love with him. He was in love with that ginger idiot. And there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it now.
He sighs out his breath, letting his eyes close for just a moment. Something about admitting it to himself releases the ball of tension in his chest, and the late hour begins catching up with him, his eyes growing heavy.
He presses his thumbs against his eyes, rubbing them and wiping the lingering tears away.
Jey wipes down the bench efficiently, tossing his stuff back in his gym bag before heading out and back up to his room. He’s in a room by himself tonight, which Paul tried to sell to them as a treat but it feels more like a punishment.
The door shuts behind him, disturbing the quiet of the early morning. He thinks about getting a shower, but honestly he’s too tired for that. He’ll take care of it in the morning before the flight.
He rolls into bed, phone in hand, and against his better judgement opens his messages again. There’s no reply, unsurprisingly, but then he sees it.
A tiny “Seen 2:34am" underneath the bubble.
Sami’s…. awake? Or was anyway. The top of his phone reads just after 3 am now.
Maybe…. just maybe…
Jey worries his bottom lip between his teeth as he feverishly types a message, giving it one quick look over before hitting send. After all, what more does he have to lose?
He lets the phone drop against his chest, trying not to get his hopes up and getting comfortable in the bed.
His eyes shut for the briefest of moments, and he feels his phone vibrate in his hands.
---- Couldn't get this out of my head- wanted to leave the ending pretty ambiguous and kayfabe compliant. Got all this angst out of me, here's hoping I get back to fluffier WIPs lol
Hope you enjoyed!!
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It never gets any fucking easier does it
#bitch bout to do smth very stupid here#i've kept my distance for what already feels like forever n i really thought by now i'd be. at least on the way to functioning on my own#i can ignore it when i'm doin ok but the pull never goes away it's always there#then i get low n i just. can't think of a reason to fight it anymore#i feel like i got sold just another lie. that if i just stay strong n don't go back then i'll start learning how to live w/o him but#did anyone actually tell me that? did i just lie to myself? he makes me feel awful most of the time but if i feel awful anyway then why not#sometimes it helps for a moment or two#that's if he even wants me around anyway. could you go either way#cause i'm sick n weak n suicidal just the way he likes me but also he might be too focused on doll to feel like playin w/ me rn#i feel like everyone told me it'd get easier but maybe they didn't. or maybe i'm doin smth wrong.#honestly it might be my fault he's gettin worse again in the first place cause maybe he was right n i just need a villain in my life#someone to blame when everything's too hard#i guess i wouldn't know what to do w/ myself if he really changed like we supposedly want him to so.....#i hate how i'm realizing he was right about more n more things all the fucking time#i can't do this on my own. i need someone to go to someone i can rely on someone to hold me#others in this system got someone who actually cares about em n what do i get? fucking val#i try not to go there cause it's not healthy but lately it's been hard to convince myself this life isn't a punishment#hell was too cozy so they put me here instead. i don't deserve to be looked after. i only deserve to be used#i don't know what exactly it was i did that was so awful but. i can't make sense of it any other way#so there must be something. this is just me gettin my due.#why else would i have been made like this? wired wrong for this world in so many ways always needin too much#so stop bitching n whining about it n just take it like a good boy#i'm still a good boy if i rly put myself into it right?#spdrvent
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insanechayne · 8 months
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starkwlkr · 26 days
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silver springs | mark webber
thanks to everyone who voted! like my seb fic, this will only have three parts
part 2
warning: cheating
requests are closed
INSTRAGRAM
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liked by sebastianvettel, landonorris and 563,377 others
yourusername congratulations oscarpiastri on your incredible sprint race win! first win in f1, but it won’t be the last!
oscarpiastri ❤️
papayafans481 DESERVED
teampiastri did anyone see the interview with david coulthard and mark webber?😭
leclerctears what happened??
teampiastri david kept bringing up y/n and mark couldn’t even say her name 🥲 he said mclaren team principal when referring to her
lewis8wdc what the fuck happened between them?🤨 i know they dated I’m guessing they ended on bad terms
op81xx girl they were gonna get married 😭 mark had the ring and even asked y/n’s family for their blessing there’s a thread on twitter about them
aussiegrit ❤️
multi21bitch you ain’t slick old man 🤨
view all 34,366 comments
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UNITED STATES GRAND PRIX
Lando had scored a podium finish while Oscar had unfortunately suffered a DNF. After the podium ceremony, you were on your way back to the Mclaren garage when you heard a familiar voice. Mark was speaking with Fernando when you had walked by them. It had been years since you were that close to Mark. Of course he was in the Mclaren garage since he was Oscar’s manager, but you were a pro at avoiding Mark Webber.
You kept walking and finally made it to the garage where you congratulated the team for their effort.
“When was the last time she spoke to you?” Fernando questioned the Aussie. He was great friends with both you and Mark. He was one of many that thought you two would end up getting married. He was utterly shocked when Mark had told him that you were no longer together.
“March twenty fifth twenty thirteen. She blocked my number, she told me I couldn’t contact any of her family members either.” He explained. “I fucked up my life, Fernando.”
No one apart from Mark and you knew the reason for the break up.
“What did you do?”
“I hurt her. After Malaysia happened, y/n tried to comfort me, but I pushed her away. I stayed in the paddock late while y/n was already in our hotel room waiting for me, i told her to just go to sleep but she never listens. I was on my way back and I decided to go to a bar and I met a woman there. . . ”
It didn’t take a genius to know what would happen next.
“Shit, Mark.” Fernando mumbled.
“That’s not even the worst part, mate. I came back to our hotel room in the morning and she had her suitcase packed. She was going back home. The woman I was with had texted her from my phone and told her everything.” Mark remembered that night all too well. “She told me she never wanted to see me again . . .”
“Funny how that turned out.”
“But she also told me something else. Her doctor had called her a few days ago and told her she was pregnant. I fucked up my life all because I got mad at the result of a stupid race!”
Like everything else in the paddock, Mark’s words didn’t stay a secret for long. A rumor confirmed true traveled fast.
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yourprivate happy birthday, my darling 🎀✨ i look forward to your sidewalk chalk artwork everyday ❤️
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wordsarelife · 2 months
Text
—gorgeous
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pairing: mattheo riddle x fem!reader
summary: being in love with your best friend might be a bad idea, but drowning your sorrows in alcohol might be your worst one yet
warnings: underage drinking, partying, no usage of y/n, a few suggestive remarks
notes: this is my official entry for the hogmarch challenge of @thatdammchickennugget using prompt 2: “are you speaking parsletongue or am i really that drunk?”
the night was rushing fast away in front of your eyes, easy chatter, at the start of the party, quickly turning into drunken singing and shouting along to the music that was drowning out everything else.
the dim blue light that was shining through the ravenclaw common room did it‘s best to worsen the drunken state many of your classmates were in.
mattheo was sitting on a couch, wearing his usual cool demeanour and being surrounded by his friends. they were known for getting a bit drunk, but never making an embarrassment out of themselves through loud singing or obnoxious dancing.
and normally you were known for sitting right next to them and doing the same.
even though it was dark, you could see mattheo's head turn and his eyes searching the crowd for you. you had excused yourself to get something to drink. that had been over ten minutes ago and you were really debating to just go to bed.
the night had turned out differently than you had expected and you weren't really in the mood to act like it hadn't.
"someone is looking for you" a voice behind you said and you turned around startled.
"harry" you said relieved when you recognized the boy.
it wasn't like the two of you were friends, after all you were coming from vastly different groups, but since a project in astronomy you had become acquaintances, sometimes sharing a few nice words at parties.
"why are you standing here all alone? why aren't you with your friends?"
"why aren't you?" you shot back, making harry quirk an eyebrow.
"well played" he complimented and smiled "i was trying to get away from dean and ginny making out"
"ouch" it wasn't really a well known fact that harry fancied ginny, but you had noticed it right away a few parties ago and he had been able to read you well enough to know that you had known.
"it's alright" he shrugged "i just don't want to sit next to it"
"who would?" you asked sarcastically as you eyes fell on the couple, hungrily making out on the couch, successfully pushing seamus off.
it seemed that a few people felt way too comfortable in the ravenclaw common room.
"oi, it's no fun with these two" seamus complained, sympathetically hitting harry's shoulder on the way to the table with the drinks.
"back to you" harry grinned, seemingly uncomfortable with talking about his secret crush on ginny weasley more than necessary "why are you avoiding riddle? i thought you two were the best of friends"
"i'm not avoiding him" you said defensively, taking a big gulp from the vodka in your cup to prevent yourself from saying any more.
harry took a moment to study your facial expression, before he sighed in a tone that almost made you tear up "oh"
"no" you shook your head "no 'oh', stop looking at me like that, potter"
harry laughed dryly "too late" he shrugged "so, being the best of friends is your actual problem, huh?"
you didn't answer his question, but took another sip from the cup. immediately regretting it.
harry cringed "if you continue drinking at that rate you won't be able to speak a coherent sentence in a few minutes"
"maybe i don't want to speak coherent sentences anymore"
"so we're already at the point of drowning our sorrows in alcohol?" he raised his cup and took a sip "no, you're right, it doesn't look like you're unluckily in love with riddle at all"
you sighed "okay, fine, you're obviously smarter than you look" you rolled your eyes.
"well, ouch" harry said offended, but you could see a hint of mischief in his eyes. "am i allowed to join your little club of self-pity?"
"sure" you nodded "the more the merrier i guess"
"there's no better way to spend a party than drown yourself in self-pity with the girl you're kind of on good terms with"
"yeah, totally" you grinned "but i think if we continue talking at that rate we will be able to call each other friends in an hour"
"deal" harry laughed, before he grabbed the bottle of vodka on the table behind you, filling both your own and his cup back up. he put the bottle back and held his cup in your direction "to unrequited love" he said dramatically.
you grimaced, but raised your cup to clink against his. "to unrequited love" you toasted "and unexpected friendships" you added.
"yeah that too" he smiled before you both took a big sip from your cups.
"vodka is fucking disgusting" you complained and harry nodded, making a face that would allow the assumption that he had been thinking the same thing.
"at least it does the trick"
you and harry spend the next hour recklessly sipping vodka, while you were telling each other ridiculous stories. the vodka had a quicker effect than either of you had thought, making the both of you dance and refer to each other as friends sooner than you had predicted.
just as 'dancing queen' began to play and you were twirling on the dancefloor, did you notice the empty spot on the couch occupied by your friends. there was only one of them missing. before it could really register in your brain who exactly was missing, a voice rang out next to you.
"make room, potter" you and harry both turned around, looking surprised at the arrival of mattheo riddle.
"matty" you laughed after the few seconds it had taken you to recognize your best friend.
mattheo's arm darted to the side, catching you before you could fall to the ground. you had made the attempt to hug him, missing his body by a few feet. you had been closer to hugging cormac mclaggen who was standing off to the side.
"there you are" mattheo noted, gently taking your cup out of your hand, sniffing the contents and grimacing at the strong sent of vodka, mixed with a bit of orange juice.
"do you want some?" you slurred, grinning up at the boy, who's arm was still holding you steady.
"how many of these has she had?" mattheo asked harry, thinking he would be a little less wasted than you.
"like thirty-four thousand?" harry answered before him and you broke into simultaneous laughter.
"had to have been a lot" mattheo muttered, noticing the way you were laughing with the chosen one, gripping his arm, like you were old friends.
he let go of you, taking harry's cup as well, emptying the both into the bucket under the table with the drinks. he came back right in time to witness you saying goodbye to harry with a dramatic hug, kissing both his cheeks and lastly his forehead.
"yeah, that's enough" mattheo said, dragging your body back against his when he noticed you going in to plant more kisses on harry's face. he looked bad enough, the red lipstick you were wearing leaving marks all over his face.
harry smiled before he waved at you and turned around, stumbling through the crowd of students probably in search of his redheaded best friend.
mattheo rolled his eyes. "you're absolutely wasted, darling"
you turned around to look at him and unconsciously bring a bit of space between the both of you "is it that obvious?" you asked.
mattheo watched with a smirk, how you tried to balance yourself out, to just be able to stand. your arm ended up stabilizing your own hip and you almost fell full on to the side, when you moved your leg.
"not really" mattheo grinned "come on, baby" he softly gripped your waist on either side, guiding you in the direction of your friends. you closed your eyes, leaning your head against his shoulder, letting him walk you through the room willingly.
"have i ever told you how gorgeous you are?"
"i am?" he asked laughing.
"so gorgeous that it hurts"
"you're flattering me" he smiled, nudging your arm. "but maybe you should concentrate more on walking in the right direction"
he was right. it was taking you way too long to cross the room, thanks to your inability to still walk in a straight line, even with his help.
"hey" mattheo greeted, making the eyes of his friends turn on him. "i'm bringing her to bed"
"already?" enzo asked skeptically, checking his watch "it's only two a.m."
"hey guys!" you greeted when your eyes snapped open. you bend forward, plastering a kiss onto enzo’s cheek. "how the party you doing? good? good!" you smiled, nodding as your eyes fell closed, as you leaned back onto mattheo again.
"what?" theo laughed at your slurred words that had not made the slightest bit of sense.
"yeah, i get it now" enzo nodded understandingly, trying to rub your lipstick off his cheek.
"she's only been gone for an hour" blaise said unbelievingly "how did she get that drunk?"
"she's had approximately like more than a thousand vodka-o's according to potter" mattheo chuckled.
"potter?" draco repeated disgustingly "what has she been doing with potter?"
"harry and i are best friends" you gushed, giving draco an angry look. he rolled his eyes in annoyance, but without questioning your answer.
"let's not get ahead of ourselves, love" mattheo argued, a bit of jealousy in his voice.
"you don't have to be jealous" you softly touched his cheek "you know i love you more than anyone, honey"
blaise let out a loud whistling noise "seems likes she's your girl after all, riddle"
"oh shut up" mattheo said at the same time as you said "of course"
"better bring her to bed now" theo advised and you could feel mattheo nod next to you.
"i'll be back in a few minutes" mattheo promised, as he softly turned you around to be able to walk you in the direction of the door.
"no he won't" you slurred, turning your head in the direction your friends, gripping mattheo's neck and winking at them.
enzo hollored and theo laughed, while blaise repeated the whisteling.
"cheers to that" even draco was amused about you, as he raised his cup in your direction.
"i'll be back" mattheo assured again, pushing you forward.
"no you won't" theo shook his head, smirking as he watched his friend roll his eyes and gently guide you through the crowd.
"how about a shot of tequila?" you suggested to mattheo, perfectly awake again. there was no hint of the tiredness that had consumed your body only a few minutes ago.
maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was the sound of a familiar voice indicating the beginning of the song 'whatta man' by salt-n-pepa, which was now booming through the boxes.
"no, no more alcohol" mattheo shook his head, suddenly being the kind of responsible he had never seen himself to become.
"oh my god!" you gushed when you finally reconized the song "that's my favorite song! let us dance, matty!"
he was distracted by two hufflepuff boys almost running into him, when you saw the perfect opportunity to escape his hold. stupidly enough, that was the only thing you could see, as you had promptly gotten lost in the crowd of people.
mattheo was at your side only a second after, making you realize that you had in fact just turned around, without moving more than a feet away from him.
"if you don't come with me on your own accord, i'll have to carry you" mattheo warned.
you giggled, clasping your hands around his biceps "let us dance" you pleaded, completely ignoring what he had said.
mattheo furrowed his eyebrows, still waiting for you to reply to what he had said, but you were busy watching a few ravenclaws and hufflepuffs downing shots. "or we could down some shots" you mumbled.
mattheo took that as answer enough, clasping one of his hands around your forearm and the other around your leg, as he bend down to throw you over his shoulder.
"matty" you protested, as he began to walk you out of the common room. you gave up arguing and continued to sing along to the chorus of 'whatta man' as mattheo walked you both through the crowd of people.
as soon as the door to the ravenclaw common room fell close behind the two of you, you slumped down on mattheo's shoulder, the tiredness hitting you immediately.
"do you want to walk on your own now, baby?" mattheo asked, but he could feel you shake your head. "can you use you words?" he was growing a bit concerned at your sudden mood shift, trying to make sure that you were still somewhat alright.
"no" you pouted "i don't want to use my words"
"you just did"
"i never let a man tell me what to do" you slurred and mattheo had to chuckle.
"clearly" he muttered under his breath.
he walked through the halls of the castle quickly, making sure that you wouldn't be discovered by one of the teachers. you would probably kill him if one of them saw you like this. you never really got that drunk often, so it was on mattheo to make sure that no one found out about it now.
he should've searched for you immediately after you hadn't come back. he shouldn't have waited an hour. but he was scared of annoying you. you were always together and he had taken your absence as a sign for you needing some space.
if he could, he would follow you around all the time, preferably holding your hand while doing so. maybe in another universe you would want him to do that.
"when are we there?" you asked, your hand wandering across his shoulder, before it finally found it's place in his hair, gripping it tightly.
"any second now" mattheo was trying to make sure not to shake your body too much, as he quickly walked down the steps to the dungeon. he wouldn't want you to throw up. "do you feel sick, sweetheart?"
"no" you muttered "i just want to sleep"
"i know, i know" mattheo patted the back of your leg "we're almost at the door"
he hadn't lied. it only took a few more seconds, before he whispered the password and the door to the slytherin common room opened, revealing the familiar green lighting as he walked you both inside. he crossed the room, climbing the stairs to your dorm.
he took his time to set you down on your bed, making sure that no quick movement could make you feel uncomfortable. he unfolded your blanket, spreading it across your body.
he was ready to leave the room, before you called him back.
"matty" you cried and he perked up, walking back to the bed. you threw the blanket to the side dramatically, revealing your trousers and shirt. "i can't sleep like this"
"oh" mattheo said dumbfounded "do you want me to take them off?" he asked slowly, gripping the waistband of your trousers.
"are you speaking parsletongue or am i really that drunk?" you giggled at the joke with your eyes still closed.
"you're really that drunk" mattheo answered, rolling his eyes at your unseriousness "and it's not funny"
"it's a bit funny" you opened your eyes and giggled at his facial expression "why are you so serious, matty?"
"i should've kept an eye on you" he answered "you don't like to be drunk"
"i can make my own decisions" you argued, crossing your arms.
"obviously" mattheo nodded "should i take them off?" he repeated his question from earlier, but the tone of his voice made you sober up immediately, well at least a bit.
"are you really angry at me right now?" you asked surprised.
"i had to leave the party to bring you to bed"
"that's not the reason you're angry" you said, knowing him well enough to see through his lie.
"okay, fine" he sat down on the bed and you sat up, drawing your knees to your chest and hugging them with your arms. "maybe i'm a bit angry that you would rather spend your evening getting drunk with potter than speaking to me"
"matty"
"no, it's fine" he shook his head "i shouldn't be angry about how you choose to spend your time. goodnight" he stood up from the bed, walking to the door quickly, so voice rang out before he was able to twist the doorknob.
"can you please just stay?" you asked and he turned around in surprise.
"what?"
"maybe i chose to spend time with harry, but i'm choosing to spend the night with you. isn't that more important?"
"that's not how it works"
"okay, fine" you said, tired of arguing "do you want to know the truth? spending time with you is super hard while i'm madly in love with you" even though you were a bit more sober than before, he could still recognize the drunkness in your voice, especially because you were never that bold.
"madly in love with me, huh?" mattheo repeated surprised, his signature smirk immediately replacing the frown on his face.
“it’s embarrassing, i know” you buried your face in your hands, hiding your rosy cheeks from his eyes. he softly took your hands in his, freeing your face of them.
"don't hide from me" he smiled "and it’s not embarrassing, because the truth is, that i'm madly in love with you too"
you smiled up at him. “can you kiss me then?” he smiled at your question, but shook his head.
“no more kisses tonight” he muttered, softly stroking your hair “we can do that tomorrow, as often as you want to, when you’re sober again”
“okay” you nodded.
he gently helped you to exchange your trousers for pyjama bottoms, before he took of his shirt and climbed into bed next to you. you cuddled close to his chest, your hair tickling him whenever you moved.
"blaise was right" you said finally "i'm your girl after all"
"you always were" mattheo whispered back, softly kissing your forehead, before the both of you fell asleep, holding onto each other.
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ceilidho · 5 months
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Hello~ new lurker here. I've been daydreaming about Price wanting a family, but not having the time to court someone, and two other possible scenarios came to kind.
Reader, not part of his team but works at the same base, who was just served divorce papers. She wanted kids, the soon to be ex-husband didn't and he found someone else. She doesn't *know* how to be a girlfriend anymore. She only knows how to be a wife.
Or
It's family day on base. Price is wistfully watching families show up for their soldiers. And overhears someone who is in the same boat as him.
"don't be getting babyfever."
"Too late. Want a baby. I want something worth retiring for."
you're hitting all my buttons with this :\\ I'm realllyyyyyy going heart eyes at the first idea though.
Poor reader who maybe got married knowing that her husband wasn't interested in having kids but hoping that she could change his mind. Then maybe accepting a childless marriage after years of being together, but always felt like she was giving up something immeasurably valuable to her, like giving away the future she'd always envisioned for herself.
Only to get hit with divorce papers after giving up so much of herself for her husband. She signs them in a daze because he's already moved in with his new girlfriend and she couldn't bear the humiliation of trying to beg for him to come back when he's already so clearly moved on.
Maybe Price has always been interested in her, but respected the ring on her finger and figured that he was just too late. A damn shame, but over the years that they've worked together, he's come to treasure her companionship. He treats himself to daydreams, to quick wanks in the shower before work so that he doesn't spend the day looking for her or hovering over her shoulder when he finds her. So he can pretend at being normal.
And his brain short circuits when she stops by his office one day and he glances down to her hands out of habit only to find them bare. No ring. Glances up again and really looks at her this time, the troughs under her eyes, dark circles from poor sleep, from crying, cheeks losing a bit of their plumpness from not eating right. Price doesn't even listen to the words coming out of her mouth, some request from her superior that she'd been tasked with bringing to him. It all falls to the wayside because her ring is gone.
He lets her confide in him, gives her his shoulder to cry on. Locks the door to his office and pulls her into his lap even though it's not appropriate, he's not her direct superior but he is a superior. He shouldn't be brushing his thumb under her eyes to wipe away her tears and speaking to her in a low, hushed voice, exhorting her to tell him everything weighing on her. He shouldn't be pitting her against her ex, telling her that he'll help her sell the house (she can't afford to buy her husband's half since it's in both of their names) and she can stay with him in the meantime.
He shouldn't feed into her anguish by telling her that he understands her pain. How much he's longer for a baby as well, just never found the right person, the right partner. The big, empty hole in his life that he's never been able to fill with work or friends or extended family. He shouldn't indulge himself in the way crying makes her pretty lips swell and her eyes go big and watery. He shouldn't nudge her into agreeing to move in with him when she's this vulnerable, still beaten up and hurt from signing the papers not even a few days ago.
He does anyway though :\\
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Text
Face it dear, you need someone like me.
Synopsis: You live a happy life with your husband, Ralph, who never notices you running off in the middle of the night to a certain radio host…
Warnings: Cheating, NSFW under the cut! Alastor being Alastor! Oh and Human Alastor because he will always be my fav <33
Navigation!! // Masterlist!! // Serendipity Writes (event )
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You lived a quiet life. Your husband Ralph was more than enough. He worked in construction and was busy all morning and into the late hours of the night, getting home at eight p.m sharp every evening. The two of you had a lovely marriage, some would say picture perfect even. A small house, living in the city. What more could you ask for?
Well maybe some alone time. Or financial security. But hey you can’t have it all right?
You hadn’t intended on cheating on your husband. Hell you didnt even want to get involved with Alastor, he was just a colleague. But, he had so sweetly convinced you to go dancing with him one night after your husband knocked out on the couch. Sneaking out was easy when he slept like a log and honestly? It was the best night of your life. You felt alive. Like things were okay. You felt so pretty in your dress, with your hair done up. The two of you had even shared a flask on your way back to your home.
But then Alastor turns down the wrong street, and now you’re on his doorstep, the both of you fiddling with the lock, trying not to pull away from each other even though you both need air. But everything felt so good, so right. When he finally opens the door to his home you both stumble in, giggling all the way. He hazardously removes your coat, letting it drop to the floor as he does the same with his. You kick your heels off, while he does the same with his. Garments are tossed as you both make your way up the stairs, sliding into walls and becoming an entangled mess of laughter. His hands are everywhere they shouldn’t be, and yours remain wrapped around his shoulders, manicured nails raking through his hair as the kisses descend from your lips down the side of your neck, where he bites down ever so slightly. He kicks the door to his bedroom open wider, the two of you walking in as he sits you on the bed, pulling back to see your face. Lips are swollen, and the red lipstick you had worn for him was smudged off the side of your lip. The marks down the side of your neck were beginning to form despite only being made moments ago, but he’s a passionate lover who loves to leave his mark on things.
No, you hadn’t intended on cheating on your husband. But he was so gentle with you, so warm and loving, his touch lit you ablaze like if you were a forest fire. Feeling something felt amazing, and he felt all the better.
No, you didn’t want to cheat on your husband. You didn’t plan on taking your lunch breaks just to walk around the park with Alastor. That wasn’t done intentionally, it just happened. The same way everything else did.
You didnt want to cheat on your husband, but when he knocks three times on your door nine thirty you know it’s Alastor. You don’t even think twice before leaving to spend the night with your favorite man. A man who isn’t your husband.
You dont like cheating on your husband. No, not when you hear him talk about how much he wants to start a family with you. How painfully you have to smile back at him, knowing you aren’t even interested in sleeping in the same bed as him anymore. What a cellophane Alastor called him.
“That man is undeserving of you dear. When are you going to be honest with yourself hm?”
He’d say, at the worst damn time too. Slotted perfectly between your legs, asking you these things when your mind is nothing but mush because of him. But isn’t that the best part? Because it’s him you’re doing all this for. It’s Alastor you choose to spend your nights with, and that makes him want you so much more. So you could imagine his pain when he knocked three times and you didn’t answer. No, not when he heard those sweet sounds of yours from the other side of the door. How dare you.
Yes, Ralph was your husband. But Alastor was so much better than him, it was almost hard to fake it. “I love you so much Y/n.” Your husband said with a sigh, sleep finally taking over his body. You just nod, feeling guilty. No, you don’t like cheating on your husband. But how are you supposed to feel when your husband doesn’t feel like your husband anymore? When he feels like a man you sleep with so he doesn’t become angry with you? You gather yourself together quickly, not even recognizing the time, and shut your bedroom door quietly. You make your way to the kitchen in a robe, and almost jump out of your skin when you see Alastor standing next to the counter with a cup of tea in his hand.
“Alastor…- Alastor I-“ You were at a loss for words. How did he even get in?
“Tell me, my dear. Why won’t you leave him?”
Alastor asks, setting his hot cup down on the counter. His smile doesn’t change, but it’s thin. You know he’s upset with you. “I don’t know. I don’t know how to, break the news to him.” You say, looking down. Alastor scoffs, pushing off the counter to walk towards you.
“Do you love him?”
Alastor asks, stopping a few feet away from you. “I do…but-“
“No. Do you love him?”
Alastor asks again. He knows the answer. You both do. “No. No I don’t.” You whisper to yourself, tears brimming your eyes. Alastor smiles wider now.
“Then why do you let him use you? You know he isn’t half as good with you as I am.”
He says, getting close enough to take your hands in his. Tears fall from your face, and Alastor coo’s as he wipes your tears.
“I don’t want to hurt him.” You say, sighing. Alastor just smiles.
“Why don’t,”
He says, moving to tilt your face to look at him. He smiles as you stare at him teary eyed, and though usually he’d love it, right now he wants that sad look gone.
“You get your things, and why don’t we leave?”
Alastor asks. You stare at him wide eyed. “Leave? But, my home-“ Alastor tut’s at you, pulling away from you to walk back to his place by the counter. You stand there, shocked.
“Do you really need to stay?”
Alastor asks with a laugh.
“Darling, you’ve already hurt him enough.”
He says, hoping that will snap you out of it. When he see’s you still, stuck there, he pinches the bridge of his nose, glasses moving up.
“He can’t give you what I can.”
He says, and you shake your head.
“Alastor he’s been a good man to me. I can’t just-“
“Can’t what? Sleep with another man and then try to act like you’re perfect? Dear you and I both know we are far from perfect.”
Alastor says, and it hurts because you know he’s right. You’ve already hurt your husband, so why are you still sticking around as if you care?
“He’s been there for me through so much. He needs me.”
You say in a low voice. You didn’t think this would hurt you this much.
“What about what you need?”
Alastor asks, studying your features closely. He walks back to you again, this time pulling you closer to meet him halfway. This time you’re forced to look at him. He gets closer to your face, and you hate the way you feel butterflies when his thumb traces your bottom lip.
“Face it dear, you need someone like me.”
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pshcomforts · 17 days
Text
➳ we can’t be friends | psh. — requested
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trainee!sunghoon x fem!reader (mentions of wonyoung from ive)
“just wanna let this story die, and i’ll be alright“
synopsis: you and sunghoon have been best friends for so long, but distance has grown between you two after he got with wonyoung.
warnings/content: written in third pov. miscommunication(?). confrontation. angst. unrequited love (kinda). open ending! reader actively avoids sunghoon, and gets closer to jake (bestie vibes only). sunghoon gets jealous (always). not proofread. cursing!
comments, likes, and reposts are appreciated :)
word count: 3.9k
a/n: message request. — this was kind of rushed, sorry :(
༘˚⋆𐙚。masterlist⋆.✧˚
current song playing: we can’t be friends by ariana grande
↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺
1:05 ──────|───────────── -3:22
night had already fallen upon hybe building and y/n was still in the practice room, staying stuck on a few dance moves that had her frustrated.
“no this is not right..,” she grumbled to herself, sighing in defeat.
“you’re still here?” a voice bellowed from behind with a chuckle afterwards.
the girl quickly turned and was delighted with a smile plastered across her face.
“sunghoon!” she beamed. “what are you still doing here?” her voice squeaked, heart doing somersaults in the sight of her handsome friend.
“i should be asking you that question.” he grinned ear to ear as he watched his best friend continue to try and catch her breath.
“you’re practicing so late, y/n. you know that’s not good,” sunghoon frowned. “trainer kim’s already gone for the night.”
she rolled her eyes at his little scowl. “i know, i know.., i just really wanted to get this dance move down.”
hoon shook his head at her words before handing her an icy, cold water bottle. “well cool down, won’t you? i have good news.”
her heart slightly clenched in response. what could be such good news at midnight?
y/n gave a quiet nod and he shyly smiled to himself.
it couldn’t be, could it?
her body was tensing with every second he let pass by in his utter motive to irk impatience.
“sunghoon!” she fumed, nudging his shoulder back in slight frustration.
the male laughed in return, fangs flashing to make her a blushing mess as he uttered, “sorry, sorry! i just wanted to build it up!”
her eyes playfully rolled as he continued.
“wonyoung and i are finally going out! you remember her, right?”
remember her? yeah.
how wouldn’t she remember such a pretty girl like her?
the way that starship trainee mindlessly talked to sunghoon, swooning him with her simple words that already had him flustered.
heck, wonyoung did what y/n couldn’t — and that was leave the friend zone.
everything else he chattered on about afterward almost deafened in y/n’s ears. she couldn’t feel anything but her heart that shattered into a million pieces. every small shard striking her by the vein in her blood, giving a numbing sensation in her hands.
“y/n?” he called, looking at her for approval. “what do you think?”
what did she think? why would that matter if he was going out with someone else?
“good..!” she mumbled, voice almost coming to a quiet squeak. “that’s good for you, hoon!”
“i was just with her and..,”
he kept going on and on, but she couldn’t bare to hear it.
how could she when she was in love with him? her best friend. her everything. her favorite person who she couldn’t call hers.
they went through thick and thin as trainees of hybe — experiencing everything big and small that’d always be celebrated upon.
and it wasn’t like she hated wonyoung. no, that gorgeous girl was too good for the world. how could she hate her?
but she knew she’d have to keep a distance.
she couldn’t do anything else but accept it anyway. besides, it was just the right thing.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
about a month had flashed by before y/n knew it, and though it wasn’t the easiest, her and sunghoon weren’t as close anymore.
he spent most of his time with his girlfriend, ensuring her the best like a good boyfriend.
but even then, he’d still try to make plans with y/n — hinting at little cafe places to try, asking about convenience store runs, murmuring about plans to sneak out of the dorms for their weekly movie nights — but she always rejected.
she avoided him with every intention she had.
if he tried to talk to her, she’d adjust her attention to someone else.
if he tried to get a duo dance with her, she’d quietly ask the trainer to switch with another person.
sunghoon didn’t know if he did something wrong but he knew the energy was off between them, as if something drifted them apart.
and to make matters worst, she had gotten closer to jake — another hybe trainee in their friend group.
hoon didn’t know why, but he hated seeing them become an iconic duo. the way jake mindlessly stepped into his position as her designated best friend was throwing him off.
he hated it. every time he’d notice their interactions, he’d find himself clenching with a tense jaw and fisted hands.
but why?
the only excuse he could find to all of this stupid resentment he had towards the aussie boy was that him and y/n weren’t the same anymore.
not at all.
and it was confirmed once he heard little mentions of ‘weekly movie nights’ pass through his ears.
sunghoon rolled his eyes with a quiet scoff leaving his throat, hating how sour he turned in a quick second.
“uhm..,” jungwon cleared his throat. “are you.. okay?”
the members, excluding jake, turned to the boy who was undeniably burning holes at the two in front of him.
“sunghoon..?” jay poked, shifting his gaze to the oldest member.
heeseung knew not to mess with hoon when he was pissed, so when he turned his direction where the boy was staring at, he prayed a little for jake.
“you can’t be jealous,” the oldest one murmured with a pat to the latter’s back.
“what?” sunghoon spat back with an annoyed face. “why would i even be jealous? i’m with wonyoung.”
“right, so.. you can’t be staring at them that way.”
“what does it matter anyway? it’s not like she’ll talk to me.”
the other members chose not to comment afterward, letting hoon continue to glare at the two with soft sighs leaving them.
he hated what was in front of him.
how could he be okay with this? how could he even be feeling this?
the burning in his heart. the rage-filled eyes. the tensed-up jaw. the fuming curse words inexplicably forming in his head.
was it really jealousy?
no. can’t be.
‘can it?’ he quietly questioned to himself, looking at the ground before picking his head back up to glance at the two.
the way y/n loudly laughed and slapped jake’s arm like it was nothing. the way she’d make her usual disgusted look as instinct. the way her fingertips would unintentionally drag against his when he’d offer a water bottle.
fuck, he hated this.
was it possible to be jealous over a best friend like this?
‘but maybe i just miss how we used to be,’ he’d attempt to rationalize.
but even then, it boiled every bit of blood he had whenever he’d find his best friend and another close trainee giggling about whatever was talked about.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
everyone was almost done for the night as they gathered into a huge circle with breath pants heard in the room, many still wheezing from practice.
“so,” niki gasped, body almost completely down on the ground. “movie night?”
a spark hit y/n’s heart when the suggestion was put out there, taking a small glance to sunghoon who already had his gaze on her.
his eyes softened once they met and it seemed to cry out for her — almost asking if she even remembered any of the memories they shared when it was a movie night, and it was just them.
and when it’d get late in the night, they’d fall asleep on each others shoulder, heads bunking against each others with quiet snores and aching backs from their positions.
then a blanket would “magically” fall over them, causing the two to cuddle as platonic friends (who were obviously in love with each other).
but she couldn’t think that way.
not when he had a girlfriend.
still though, she couldn’t help but let her eyes stay on his a little longer than intended, eventually letting it linger onto every facial feature on him that she used to adore.
his moles, his fanged smile, his thick brows, his charming eyes — with her effort to avoid him, her heart beat more than it did before after re-loving his features.
but she turned away after feeling like a creep, shifting it to jake instead, who was smiling like a puppy with big eyes.
“yes, a movie!” she heard him beam.
best friend coded indeed.
a smile curled onto her lips as she heard each member chime in on their part to agree.
“i’m in,” sunghoon’s aggressive voice uttered.
the rest of the members turned to y/n with pleading eyes — “what about you?”
she took a gulp. she wanted to reject after finding out that he’d be there but they were all still friends.
“um..,” she croaked, chewing her lips while avoiding eye contact from the boy she was still in love with.
“oh come on! you and sunghoon used to always have secret movie nights with just the two of you!” niki yelled in defense, causing a loud smack to be thrown at him from jay.
it was awkward and quiet given that everybody knew the two used to be inseparable.
a tense chuckle erupted out of y/n while she only scratched her head.
“yeah we did..,” she admitted. “but i don’t know, they’ve become more strict with where we go now.”
“we’ll be finee!” sunoo tried to deflect.
a few more pleadings happened here and there, eventually leading y/n to quietly fume out a — “fine.”
the six members cheered in delight while sunghoon hid his smile. he was finally going to spend some time with his best friend.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
as the members happily walked out of the practice room, hoon was left alone, staying behind to clean up just a little more — unbeknownst to the fact that y/n had accidentally left her jacket in the room.
she walked back with quiet curse words in her head, hating to have to go back and forth.
when she walked in, she unexpectedly found sunghoon staring right at her with fluttered eyes.
“oh..,” she murmured, body tensing in seconds.
“hey…,” the boy replied, shoving his hands into his pockets with a slight sigh of relief. he was finally alone with her and his heart was melting at the fact that it was only them now.
“you forget something?”
his thick brow raised in question, causing y/n’s stomach to flood with butterflies. she gulped and nodded before forcing her feet to move to her jacket — which was close to him.
“yeah..,” she awkwardly laughed. “i forgot my jacket, but i’ll see you there!”
✩ ‘i don’t wanna tip toe, but i don’t wanna hide’ ✩
she attempted to leave but the pull on her wrist struck her back to the same spot as earlier.
y/n felt the grip of his hand softly tighten, careful to not be too rough in how he held her.
“y/n, talk to me.”
his husk voice rang in her ears, sending alarming signals throughout every part in her body as she shivered.
“what do you mean?” the girl tried to deflect, hating the sudden confrontation.
✩ ‘but i don’t wanna feed this monstrous fire’ ✩
“you know..,”
a lump was caught in her throat and she couldn’t get it past her to swallow it down.
“we’re gonna be late, sunghoon, we should go.”
her body faced the door, turning her back on him to finally leave the scene when his voice stopped her — “are you gonna keep avoiding me?”
y/n’s heart dropped. “no..,” she mumbled back with a lip bite. “we’re fine.”
“you haven’t talked to me in weeks, we’re not fine and you know it.”
when she turned to face him, she found the boy to strike her with unforgiving eyes that had tears almost taking its fall.
she hated that she was the reason for his obvious pain, but they were friends, why would it hurt him?
a sigh left her throat as she scoffingly smiled. “you’re with wonyoung now, can’t we just focus on that?” she tried to attempt another lip curl to uplift the mood, but sunghoon wasn’t buying it.
“no, you’re my friend and i want to know why you’re not talking to me the way you used to.” his brows furrowed and a slight eye roll was taken as he thought back to her and jake laughing to themselves.
he watched her carefully for any readable expression but she only kept her gaze down.
“friend?” she softly reiterated. “that’s all i am to you?”
this time, it was sunghoon who froze in his stance. “what?” his eyes blinked repeatedly. “what are you talking about?”
his grip accidentally loosened and y/n felt it, taking the chance to slip out of the hold and say, “nevermind sunghoon, it’s nothing.”
“it’s not nothing if you can’t tell me.” he grumbled, feeling slightly irritated at her lack of communication.
“drop it.”
she walked towards the middle of the room, allowing him to catch up while uttering — “no, tell me.”
“it’s nothing.”
“y/n.”
his lips firmly pushed together as he expressed a disappointed reaction at her.
“let it go, it’s not important.”
“so then just tell me.”
they went back and forth, voices overlapping and echoing over each others.
“sunghoon, enough!” y/n exclaimed, pushing his chest back. “it doesn’t matter anyway so what’s it to you?”
hoon clicked his tongue. “i know you’re purposely avoiding me but i honestly can’t think of what i’ve done, so i’m just gonna ask this once.”
he sighed before continuing, “why are you avoiding me? did i do something to upset you?”
✩ ‘i didn’t think you’d understand me’ ✩
he leaned himself a little closer to her, causing the girl to softly back away with blushing cheeks. she hated how much her heart still lit up at every small thing he did.
“no, i’ve just been busy…,”
sunghoon scoffed, disbelief clear in that puff of air as he continued to gaze at her. “don’t try that with me, y/n. i know you, and i know you don’t like to talk when something bad happens, so what happened?”
“hoon, enough, please.”
she picked her head up to peer back at him with pleading eyes, but he couldn’t stop. he had to know.
“no.” he firmly spoke with a soft sigh. “you can’t get out of this because i need to know.”
y/n picked up on the way his eyes quickly watered. though he tried to hide it and look composed, she still couldn’t help but notice the tears that built up around.
“why?” she exhaled a breath of hers. “why do you need to know so badly hoon?? we’re just friends.”
‘friends’ — she hated how she had to confirm that to herself.
“exactly.” sunghoon spat. “you’re my friend, you’re the one i go to about wonyoung and other things, and now you’re so suddenly close with jake. what even is that? you’re here, but why aren’t you here for me?”
is that all she was to him?
her heart shattered, and all she wanted to do was clench onto the pain. she bit her lip as she responded, “jake has nothing to do with this, he’s only been close with me because of his interest in my friend. even then, you don’t need to know this. you’re in a relationship now, there are limits that i’m not gonna cross because you should be telling wonyoung this, not me.“
she paused, clenching her teeth to bite back the tears that were close to streaming. “i’m not your girlfriend. i’m not.. your girlfriend.” she repeated, letting the second sentence bring her back to reality.
there was a flicker in his eyes once she confirmed it — like his gaze shifted from what was once stern to a softer stare.
but he stayed quiet for a while, unsure of what to say.
tension filled the air, and it was beginning to suffocate y/n with how awkward and tense it was.
“i missed you, did you know that?” sunghoon croaked in the silence, lips faintly curling. “i missed you, and i missed how we were. what did i do that made you not talk to me anymore? because whatever it was, i’m sorry.”
he didn’t get the message, and he still wasn’t understanding.
the boy continued to go on and on, apologizing for whatever he did that could possibly upset her.
“sunghoon-“ but he kept blabbering.
“sunghoon-“ but he couldn’t stop thinking about what he did wrong.
“sunghoon!” she finally bursted, finally catching his attention.
he let his gaze fall on her and she heaved her chest in fear, feeling her legs become limb.
“i..,” her voice trailed off, stopping herself to not say the three words thats been stuck in her head. “i can’t be friends with you.”
her heart shriveled at the words that left her mouth. she didn’t know what’d spew out, but once it echoed in the room, she couldn’t take it back.
“what?” hoon softly murmured, taking small steps closer to her.
his face was close enough that she could feel his breath hit her skin, but not too close where his lips could ghost over hers.
“why?”
y/n’s gaze fell down to his lips and watched how it trembled. he was hurt.
her head was still drooped low until his finger hooked under her chin, bringing it up so they could lock eye contact.
“tell me.” he softly whispered, softened eyes indicating that he wanted to hear the truth.
the girl didn’t do anything, letting silence take over once more before a phone buzzed in the room.
the two snapped out of it, turning their attention towards the device and seeing the contact name of jungwon pop up.
‘are you guys coming? what’s taking you guys so long? ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ’
a sigh escaped from y/n’s lips as she finally backed away.
once the jacket and the phone was in her possession, she found sunghoon already close to the door.
he gave the cold shoulder, eyes faintly giving a glare towards her, but she still found a hint of her best friend in there.
he scoffed a little before leaving the practice room to herself.
right, she said they couldn’t be friends.
she sighed as she held herself back longer than intended so she wouldn’t cross with him, soon leaving to jay’s place right after.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
as the night progressed further and y/n finally arrived not too long after sunghoon did, their movie night eventually begun.
the film was decided upon a vote, clearing it to be a horror movie, as always.
a few members situated themselves on the ground while others sat on the couch — including y/n who was comfortably by jake.
sunghoon stayed in the kitchen, gathering his snacks before approaching the group of idiots clustered into one.
“sunghoon hyung, i saved you a spot on the couch!” jungwon beamed, patting the cushioned seat though sitting on the ground.
the older boy grinned with a murmur of ‘thanks.’
but when he looked up at the people on the furniture, his heart slightly dropped. the girl who wasn’t his friend anymore was next to jake (like always).
he softly grumbled quiet curse words. was it jealousy again?
whatever. it wasn’t like he cared anyway. (he did)
✩ ‘you cling onto your papers and pens’ ✩
y/n was now squeezed between jake, who was all giddy about his current crush and sunghoon, who was her used-to-be best friend.
the film finally started and the lights were completely turned out for the full horror effect.
but the girl didn’t like horror movies. as much as she hated it, she couldn’t oppose to it with how much excitement thrilled the boys, so she forced herself.
or tried to force herself.
throughout the movie, she’d try to hide behind her hands, covering her eyes so she could only look at what she wanted to see.
sunghoon couldn’t help but linger his gaze over to her. he knew she didn’t like anything horror. heck, she used to scold him whenever he’d put it on to tease.
✩ ‘wait until you like me again’ ✩
watching her peek through her hands was adorable, and watching her quietly squeal at every small jumpscare was heart-throbbing.
wait. adorable and heart-throbbing?
was he going crazy?
he shook his head, hating that he slowly transitioned to this thinking.
the boy tried to change his attention back to the screen in front of him, but they’d still linger back onto her.
and of course she didn’t notice, her eyes were basically closed with how much she shielded herself away from the movie.
his heart always felt full at the sight of her. how could it not? the way she looked in desperate need to cling onto someone (him), and the way she was almost about to burst with how much horror movies bothered her.
he wanted to hold and comfort her, just anything for her to know that she shouldn’t fear such a thing, but as a friend right?
sunghoon chewed his cheeks in thought. how could he be thinking this when she stated she couldn’t be friends with him?
he sighed and forced himself to stare at the tv screen, hating the conflicting swelling in his chest.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
when the movie ended, most of the members had knocked out.
the ones on the ground overlapped legs and arms with each others while jake took up half of the couch, leaving y/n to curl up into a ball and be slightly close to sunghoon.
the only one awake was hoon, chuckling as he turned off the end credits of the movie.
once he was comfortably situated in the tight space, he scrolled through social media, laughing about whatever until he felt a sudden bump on his shoulder.
sunghoon paused once he confirmed what he thought it was. he took a gulp, and turned towards the direction of the thunk.
the sight in front of him had his heart fluttering. he found y/n soundlessly asleep with her head set on his shoulder, quiet snores leaving her mouth as she unintentionally snuggled closer.
he missed this. all he could think about was how they’d fall asleep after their own movie nights, and she’d rest against his shoulder with their height difference.
he smiled to himself, lips stupidly curling at every memory flooding back. then he’d think about every little thing y/n would laugh about, every small detail about him that she made sure to remember, every single recollection that they shared together.
then he started thinking about her and her personality that was made match in heaven to suit him.
and eventually, it’d lead to her attractive features — her crooked smile, her eye smiles, her constant nose crinkles, her adorable habits that he loved to copy.
god, he looked like an idiot with how much he smiled to himself.
he didn’t even smile like this when he thought about wonyoung, but he loved her, not y/n.
then the trickling fear hit him.
panic spread across his face as he looked back at the sound-asleep girl next to him.
his heart was almost beating out of his chest once he realized it.
she was right. they couldn’t be friends.
✩ ‘i’ll wait for your love’ ✩
★・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・★
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flowercrowngods · 1 year
Text
based on this post, because at this point i think it's safe to say @unclewaynemunson is actually my muse or something (hi anna i hope this is okay even though it’s, like, way angsty and way too long huh)
🤍 also on ao3
Two days after Starcourt, concussed and beaten, Steve has a seizure.
His ears are still ringing when the doctor gives him a stern glance over the rim of his glasses and pronounces him unfit to drive. No, in fact, he claims Steve poses a real danger to himself and others if he sat behind a wheel again.
Immediately, Dustin and Robin jump to promising that they won't let him do that, and in another life Steve is sure he would be grateful, or at least reasonable about it, but in this one he has a horrible second where the floor falls out from under him and he wishes, for just one second, that his head had been shaken a bit more, just enough to–
It makes him nauseous even thinking that. Everything does, lately. He closes his eyes against the offensive brightness of the hospital room and lets the sound of Dustin's and Robin's voices wash over him as he takes a moment to really take in what the doctor's orders entail.
He can't drive anymore. No more late night drives to watch the street lights pass and lull him into a safer state of mind than his bedroom walls could. No more driving the kids to their DnD sessions, no more taking Robin anywhere at the drop of a hat, no more bickering, no more reign over the music, no more stern glances through the rearview mirror, no more "Shut up, Wheeler, or you're leaving the car."
No more "Thanks, Steve!", no more "I'll bring some of mom's cookies if you drive us to the arcade", no more "You're the best" or "You're a lifesaver" or "I owe you one".
No more place for him in the group, no more use for him, no more...
No more. Nothing. Now he's just Steve, would-be lifesaver, 'has-been babysitter', 'could-have-been somebody until he lost his license to drive because he wasn't quick enough, wasn't good enough, wasn't strong enough'. Just Steve.
He doesn't know how to be that. Who is Steve Harrington without his car, without the one thing he was good for anymore?
The pit in his chest is deep enough, dark enough to pull him in, and for a moment the very thing he is good for is misery.
He waits until a nurse makes everyone leave for the night, and then he cries. It makes his head hurt, pressure building behind his eyes, but he's used to being in more pain than any teenager should be in, so he curls in on himself and hides underneath the blanket.
Here's to hoping the others won't notice just how useless he is now. Not too soon, anyway. He wants another month. A painless month filled with laughter and hugs, and then they're free to leave, to pull back slowly. Calls unanswered, radio channels changed so he won't reach them, sheepish apologies and rain checks, because now Nancy will drive them. Or Jonathan. Hell, maybe Max will take the risk just to avoid him.
---
He gets a week of daily visits in the hospital, the doctors and nurses insisting on keeping him here, a watchful eye on his vitals, scanning his head three times during his stay, insisting he has head trauma of a severely worrying degree.
Nancy picks him up from the hospital and it's awkward, tense, too much left unsaid between them but there's no one else to do it. Steve's hands are shaking, gripping the seatbelt the whole way home – and then his heart falls when he sees his Beemer in the driveway. The glorious, trusty, wonderful, best fucking car anyone could wish for. His baby. His.
He throw up into the brushes when he realises that he won't get to take it on one last ride. Maybe he shouldn't be so attached to a car. Maybe he's being pathetic about it. At least he can explain away the fat tears in his eyes now, and Nancy doesn't press.
The first thing he does when Nancy is gone is calling Robin, and she's excited when she says, "I'll come right over!" and Steve wants to ask, how, but he keeps his mouth shut, biting his lip. It's stupid, but the thought of someone else driving Robin over makes his skin crawl.
"Alright," he says instead, his voice raspy, and he hangs up before she can detect something in his voice.
After that, he goes outside again and runs his hand along his Beemer. It's shining in the sun; he had it cleaned the other week, the full program, every step in the book to celebrate four years since he got her.
"Four years, huh," Steve says, his nail catching on a minor scratch that isn't even visible but might be more familiar to him than even his home. "Damn good four years."
He's talking to his car. God, it's so stupid, it's so stupid, it's so stupid–
Steve's knees give out and he gives in to the desire that's burning under his skin sometimes, the desire to just sit down and ignore the world. Because everything is less real when you're sitting down somewhere you're not meant to be, and the ground is warm, and Steve just wants the world to go. His head is leaning back against the warm metal of the driver's door, and he closes his eyes for a while, his head still spinning, his ears still ringing, everything still awful.
After a while, there’s a shadow followed by a weight settling down between him, a head landing on his shoulder, a hand taking his.
"I'm so sorry, Stevie," Robin says. The lack of dingus makes it more real, somehow. More tragic. More pathetic.
"I'll live." And it feels a bit like a lie.
---
He gets his month. A month filled with barbecues in his backyard, the kids coming by after school to check on him, and Robin has practically moved in. Joyce picks him up on Friday nights for dinner at their house for a change of scenery.
It’s a good month, though Steve feels trapped. Caged. A bird without his wings, a boy without his car. Steve without his one purpose, the one thing he was good for. He has to be picked up because they don’t trust him walking, or they have to come to his place. And soon the worried glances that are thrown his way are too much, caging him further, reminding him of what this is. A pity party — quite literally. No one trusts him anymore, there’s always someone jumping to help him, not caring or listening to his protests.
And he can’t leave, because “What if you have a seizure in your room?”
It makes him want to scream.
Maybe it shows, or maybe everyone’s just fed up with him now that he can’t provide his taxi services anymore, but after summer the Byers dinners stop and the kids pull away.
“Told you that’s all I’m good for,” Steve says with a mean, pained huff as he hangs up the phone. Claudia said Dustin isn’t home, but he could hear the kids in the background. It hurts more than it should.
“What is?” Robin asks from her place on the floor with her back against the wall.
“Nothing.”
She frowns. “Come on, dingus, you can’t start and then—“
“No, I mean it. Nothing. That’s what I’m good for now that I can’t drive them anymore.”
“Bullshit!” she says, and it comes out so harsh that it makes Steve flinch. He swallows. Right. Robin isn’t hear to listen to him whine about how he feels like he has no place in this town, in this group, in this life anymore now that his head is so fucked up he can’t even be trusted to live alone.
That’s why Robin is here, right?
The babysitter becomes the babysitted… or something.
She doesn’t care, not really. She doesn���t listen. She doesn’t ask.
“Steve, they’re kids.”
“Yeah, well. So am I.”
He turns away from her and ignores the tears threatening to fall. The door to his room falls shut and he would love to lock it just to make a point to the world at large, a point that it can’t shut him out if he shuts himself in, but he knows it’s too risky. If he has a seizure, Robin needs to get in.
He can’t even stay in his room alone without supervision anymore. What kind of a fuck-up is he becoming, where does it end? He’s already managed to chase away the kids, even Dustin only checks on him sporadically anymore, and it hurts. He wants to know why, wants to know what he did, how to take it back, how to get them back.
But then he remembers how it all started. Dustin needed a ride and someone to take a beating. Both of which he can’t do anymore without risking life and death of himself and others. He’s a safety hazard. He’s useless. He’s Steve fucking Harrington, which doesn’t mean anything anymore.
---
And then it’s spring, and Chrissy Cunningham is found dead in Eddie Munson’s trailer. The group is back together again, the Party assembled once more. And Steve, for a just one second, hopes that he can get it right this time, that he can do this again. One last time. Because Vecna slash Henry slash One surely is it.
But then they turn on him — even Eddie looks confused, which is a rather adorable look on him — the moment Steve tries to get a word in.
“You’re not coming with us, Steve.” That’s Dustin, and Steve just rolls his eyes, but then Robin joins in.
“Yeah, no, I’m with the gremlin on this, dingus.”
“Hey!”
“Oh shut it, Henderson.” She turns to him, her eyes softer but no less burning another hole inside Steve. “We can’t risk it, Steve.”
“Risk what?” It’s a challenge. His shoulders squared, his jaw clenched, he’s challenging her, and it’s cruel.
She holds his eyes, her expression icy, like he’s stupid. “We can’t risk you dying. We can’t risk you getting a seizure mid-fight or just by being in the Upside Down.”
“Hey, woah,” Eddie tries to get a word in, but Steve won’t hear him as the desperation, the loneliness, the feeling of being caged like a bird and still the only human left on a desolate planet, all that breaks free.
“We all know that dying in a fight is the only thing I’m good for anyway.”
The silence among their war council, as Max dubbed it, is deafening.
“What?” Lucas sounds small when he asks that, and Steve closes his eyes. He hadn’t meant for him to hear that. Any of them, actually. They weren’t supposed to know.
“Steve, that’s not true.” Dustin’s words are filled with disbelief and worry, and Steve hates the worry, it makes his skin crawl, it makes his heart race, it makes his fists clenched and it makes him want to scream again.
“What else then, huh?” he asks weakly. “What else is there? None of you even talk to me anymore since Starcourt. Since summer.”
“Because you were pulling away,” Nancy explains, though her words are weak and her mouth clicks shut when Steve looks at her.
“Because we’re scared.” Max this time, and Steve doesn’t want to look at her, doesn’t want to tell a child that she’s not allowed to be scared for him— not more than he is, anyway. It doesn’t make sense for him to be hurt. They don’t want him to die. That’s a good thing, right? They didn’t want to see him hurt, so they looked away. It makes sense.
But it also hurts.
Steve shakes his head and pinches the bridge of his nose before all but running from the trailer. He doesn’t make it far (“Stay close so we won’t have to worry”), just needs some fresh air and to sit down somewhere the world will become a bit less real again.
The stairs it is. He tries to breathe through the lump in his throat, clenching and unclenching his hands to get rid of the anger and the hurt and all that excess energy.
He doesn’t want to die, is the thing. The very thought makes him nauseous and panicky. He wants his life back. His car. The freedom to just jump in there and get away. He doesn’t want the cage or the worry or the hovering or the loneliness when he isolates himself from all that.
Face buried in his hands, Steve almost misses it when someone comes to sit beside him. The thick smell of leather and cigarettes tells him who it is without looking up.
Eddie doesn’t speak for a while, just sits with him as Steve calms down.
And then, after a while, he lights a cigarette and asks, “You get seizures, Harrington?”
Steve nods. “Sometimes.”
Eddie hums. “That sucks.”
He nods again, and then that’s that. But even though it was a rhetorical question and Eddie didn’t even need an answer, it feels pathetically good to be asked about something. About himself. It only makes the pit inside his chest deeper, cutting into his soul with a sharp edge, this tiny little moment of normalcy. He wants to cling to it. He wants to talk to Eddie. God, he hasn’t really talked to anyone in so long.
“Before Starcourt — remember, the mall? The fire? Yeah that was, uhm. More monster shit. And Russians who thought I was a spy and then… yeah. Anyway. Uh. We used to be friends, I think. The kids and I. They used to care — or I like to think that they did. And then I got one too many head injuries, and the seizures started, and then they… It became too much. For them, for me. And the caring stopped. And, like, it’s fine or whatever, but I still care, and I can’t let them do all that alone. I know that all I was good for was taking them somewhere with my car, but I can’t drive anymore, so now I’m just… I’m just Steve. No titles attached, no use or function or point.”
Eddie just stares at him, puzzled and intrigued and even a little sad, and Steve wants to laugh it off when the silence stretches.
“Sorry, that’s kind of a sob story, you—“
“Wait here,” Eddie says, stubbing out his cigarette before disappearing back into the trailer. Steve watches him with a confused frown but stays put. A minute later, the door flies open and a scandalised looking Max appears, followed by the rest of the crew.
“You what?!”
“Uh,” Steve blinks. “I what?”
“Eddie told us you think you’re useless and that we don’t like you and that all you were ever good for is driving us from A to B with, like, no personal value whatsoever,” Dustin fills in, sounding no less bewildered. “Is that true, Steve?”
And God, the kid is so good at making all his questions sound like dares that Steve instinctively wants to swallow and negate it, tell them that Eddie misheard, that he’s fine, that everything fine.
But then Robin’s whispered little, “Steve” stops him from doing that. In fact, the sadness and confusion on their faces makes the dams break once more, confronted with months of spiralling and no one to drag him out, no one to listen.
Tears spring to his eyes and he gets up from the stairs to properly face them. He shrugs. It’s as much of a confirmation as anything.
And then Dustin sprints forward and tackle-hugs him, burying his face in Steve’s chest with no intention to let go anytime soon.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbles into Steve’s shirt and Steve runs a hand through his hair immediately.
“It’s okay, Dustin.”
“No! It’s fucking not okay, Steve, stop saying that. You’re my big brother, you’re my best friend, you’re my hero! You’re the coolest guy I know and nothing’s gonna change that, okay?”
“Then why’d you leave?” His voice is so small, but Dustin only hugs him tighter.
“Because you were hurting and I was… I feel like all of that is my fault.”
“Why would it be your fault, Dustin?”
He shrugs, and it breaks Steve’s heart. Dustin thinks everything is his fault just like Steve thinks it’s his.
“It’s me who got you into the thing with the Russians. I insisted. And you were tortured for it, Steve! You… You told us to go, and we did, and then we came back and you were— you-“
“Hey,” Steve whispers, curling himself around and over Dustin. “Hey, no, it’s okay. It’s not your fault. None of that.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
“I’m sorry I pulled away, Steve,” Dustin sniffles and looks up at him. “I swear it’s not because I think you’re useless. It’s just… I’m so scared.”
And it makes sense, somehow. The anger leaves Steve when he whispers, “Me too. And I don’t like it when you’re all scared and worried. I hate it.”
“I know. Sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Shut up.”
And then they’re both laughing with tears in their eyes. Lucas and Max join them with their own promises that Steve isn’t worthless to them.
“Did you read my letter? You know, the one if…”
“No,” Steve says. “You told me not to.”
“Right. Anyway, read it. Whatever happens, I want you to read it. Because you’re my brother and you mean too much for me to, like, never let you know. But, uh. Billy died. And I hated him, but it fucked me up. And then you almost died, and then you almost died again; and then you just… collapsed. And I thought, I cant do this again, not with someone I actually like. Not with you. And I didn’t wanna watch. I watched Billy. I… I can’t watch you die, Steve.”
She’s crying by the end of it, and Steve pulls her against his chest. Shit, he hadn’t meant to make anyone cry like that.
“It’s okay, Max, I get it.”
“Not okay,” she shakes her head again. “I know it’s not. But—“
“I know.” He’s stroking through her hair. “I know.”
“Uh, guys? I hate to break up the heartfelt confession time,” Eddie chimes in. “But I think our window is closing.”
Right. The end of the world.
With one last squeeze to Max’s shoulders, he lets her go and they gather their things. Discussions about Steve’s joining their mission have been put on hold while their window is still open. They can continue this later.
Nancy drives while Max holds Steve’s hand in the back. They don’t talk and she has her headphones on, letting Kate Bush work her magic, but it’s fine. It feels a bit like healing.
He catches Eddie’s eyes on the other side and holds them for a while. Eddie smiles before looking away, and Steve does the same.
---
In the end, Steve doesn't climb the rope with them. He stays behind in Eddie's trailer even though every fibre of his being screams at him to join. But Nancy has a point when she explains to him that she and Robin got this. It's the first time he stays behind, and he hopes it will be the last.
They hug him before leaving, all of them. Promises are made to talk about this later, after, and he nods.
"Go save the world for me," he tells Robin, holding her tight, unwilling to let go.
"Only for you," she promises, and kisses his cheek before pulling away. "You better be right here when we come back."
He shrugs and gives her an encouraging smile. "I've got nowhere else to be, Buckley. Now go." The last words are whispered and it feels like goodbye. Steve should join them, he should be there! But his head is pulsing and he knows that one wrong move could leave him half blind with a migraine, and they don't need one more handicap.
The one thing he can do, though, is helping them climb the rope, and it makes him feel ridiculously proud, seeing them land safely on the other side, smiling up (or down?) at him. Robin and Nancy wave one last time before heading off.
That leaves him alone with Eddie and Dustin. The latter is already climbing the rope, itching to finally do something, preparing the trailer for their plan.
Only Eddie is left, and Steve looks over at him.
"Will you be okay, Steve?"
"Sure."
Eddie sighs and looks up at the gate, disbelief and resignation and even a hint of fascination in his eyes.
"It should be you," he says, and Steve frowns, confused. "You're the hero here."
"No," Steve huffs, smiling at the metalhead. "No, I'm no hero. The real heroes are already up there, and in California. The real hero died after Starcourt. I'm just the driver who lost his license, the boy with the bat. The protector who needs to be protected."
Eddie looks at him again, that kind of intense stare, the one that shows Steve that Eddie sees something in him. He wonders what it is, but isn't sure he wants to know.
"I think you're wrong, Steve." He says it with such gentle conviction that it takes Steve's breath away for a second, and something passes between them as they hold each other's eyes.
Eddie opens his mouth to say something, but then–
"Eddie!" Dustin is calling for him from the other side, and the boys snap out of their daze.
Steve steps into Eddie's personal space and pulls him to his chest. "Make him pay," he says. "But stay safe. Come back, okay? First sign of danger, you abort mission. Come back, Eddie. I'll be right here."
"Yeah," Eddie rasps, and he squeezes Steve once more. "Catch me when I fall through that gate in two hours?"
Steve laughs, a sad little thing, and he pushes Eddie away from him, hands steady on his shoulders. "Sure, big boy."
"Hey, that's my part."
"Say it when you come back, then."
This thing passes between them again, and then Eddie goes to climb the rope. Steve's hands find their way to his hips, steadying him, but Eddie is strong enough to pull himself up without problem. Huh.
"In the meantime, wrap your head around the fact that you're the one I'm coming back for, pretty boy."
And then Eddie is gone. Steve watches as he falls through the gate, landing on the mattress with more elegance this time, and then he, too, grins down (or up?) at Steve.
He gives a little wave, and then he is alone.
Plenty of room to think when your friends have gone on a suicide mission and you're the one who has to stay behind. The one who will have to do the explaining when things go south. The one who will have to watch and listen, helpless.
It makes him regret the past few months, the self isolation, all the times he pulled back, all the times he didn't push for an explanation or a conversation, all the times he hadn't asked the kids if they're alright because he was too caught up in all the ways that he wasn't.
God, he wants them to be okay. He wants to talk about this, wants them to tell him he's more than the driver without a license, more than the protector who needs protecting. He wants Eddie to come back and explain what he meant, say what he wanted to say. He wants...
He wants his old life back. But more than that, he wants them in his new life just as much. He wants to be brave enough for this new life and find a new purpose. Create one if he can't find it.
But he can't do it alone. He refuses to do it alone even one day more.
"Come back to me," he whispers, looking up at the gate from where he's sitting on the floor, back against the wall. "Come on guys, you've got this. Please work. Please, make the plan work."
And then, miraculously, it does. Eddie falls into his arms with an undignified squeal and the rest of the Party soon follow. They're unscathed, miraculously, and Steve cries as he holds them, all of them, in a group hug that makes the trailer smell like relief and grief and a new life ahead of them. Slowly, with an unnatural sound, the gate above them closes, and then silence reigns.
They cling to him now. Refuse to let go. Good thing he has nowhere to go as Lucas gasps and sobs into his chest, explaining what happened, that Jason almost destroyed the walkman, that Max could have died. And Steve runs shaky hands through his hair, pulling in Max, too, so the three of them can just hold each other for a second.
Dustin and Eddie are hugging beside them, and Nancy and Robin hold hands, a different kind of horror in their eyes, but they smile wetly at Steve as their eyes meet.
It's over. It's done.
They did it. They really did it.
Steve closes his eyes and holds Lucas and Max tighter. They don't complain.
---
Three days later, Steve's house is brimming with life again like it hasn't in months. Turns out, Hopper survived, and he hugged Steve for a whole five minutes, telling him he did good, he did great, he's a hero. Again with that shit that Steve doesn't believe, but he doesn't have the heart to tell Hop, so he just buries deeper into their embrace.
"It's good you're alive," he tells him, and the Chief sobs out a laugh.
"You too, kid. This town would be lost without you."
"Yeah, right," Steve laughs back, and then that is that.
Except, it isn't, because when he returns to the living room with Hop, Joyce and El in tow, everyone's standing, looking at him with timid expressions. Robin and Eddie are holding hands this time, and so are all the kids. They all look like they have something to say, and the only thing missing is a large banner that says INTERVENTION.
"Uh, what's going on?"
Dustin is the first to clear his throat, but only after Erica kicks him. "We wanted to apologise. For leaving you when you needed us the most."
Oh. Steve's shaking his head, placating words already on the tip of his tongue, ready to explain to them how that's not their fault, how that was all him, he could have said something, he could have asked, he could have–
"Steve," Nancy says, effectively cutting off any protest he could have voiced. "Just listen, okay? Don't say anything."
He looks at Joyce, who nods, and Hopper who looks about as lost as he feels.
Dustin continues then. "You deserved better, Steve, you really, really did. We all did, I think, but you... You put yourself in harm's way from the get-go."
"Yeah, you came to protect me when you didn't even like me." Jonathan this time. "No thoughts, just protection. I owe my life to you. Every single one in this room does, y'know."
"And what you got for it is severe head trauma and... us abandoning you." Nancy.
"You're not just the driver, Steve. You never were just a driver to us." Hell, even Mike is in on this? "You're annoying, you suck, and you don't even try not to act like you're everyone's big brother."
"You're family, Steve." Oh, baby Byers. That's what gets his eyes stinging and his lip trembling, so he bites down on it so they won't have to see. It's futile with the way they're smiling.
"Yeah. You're so much more than our babysitter," Lucas explains. "You're the best basketball coach."
"You actually listen to my music and read comics with me," Max continues with a smile. "You suck just a little less than everyone else in this town."
"Hey!"
"No, she has a point."
Steve's not keeping up with the who's who anymore, he's trying too hard to keep it together.
"You teach me new words," El says, smiling. "You give me your clothes, you take me shopping, you teach me how to deal with meanies."
And the list goes on. Everyone has something to say to him, something beyond the ways he can be useful. Something that he is to them, something meaningful, something that sounds a lot like purpose and family.
"And we were so scared, because you were hurt. Because of us. You were protecting us, and look where it got you. You're a hero, Steve. As real as they get, you are one."
"More than Wonder Woman," Max agrees. "More than Superman. You're Steve! And that's... He’s our hero."
"He’s our brother," Dustin says.
"He’s my son," Joyce adds, taking his hand.
"He’s our friend," Erica, Mike and El say in unison.
“He’s the one we stay for.” Robin’s eyes shine as she smiles.
“And the one we come back for.” Eddie’s smile is gentle, confident, and captivating. Steve can’t look away, even through his own tears.
---
In the following months, Robin gets her license and Eddie develops a sixth sense for whenever Steve needs to just sit in a car and ride around town, watching the street lamps pass and letting them lull him to sleep. There’s an upside to being a passenger, he finds, because he falls asleep like this a few times, always waking when Eddie kills the engine. He drives for hours sometimes, admitting with a blush high on his cheeks that he didn’t want to wake Steve.
Somewhere on the highway to Indianapolis, between three and four in the morning, Steve looks at Eddie in the soft glow of the night, and finds that he’s fallen in love.
And in the weeks and months and years that follow, he realises that that’s something new he’s good at.
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lightseoul · 1 year
Text
you and me, both
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synopsis. mina and kirishima invite you to a night out. ‘it won’t be like last time!’ they said. you begrudgingly go. (part 1)
cw. gn!reader, gradstudent!reader, prohero!katsuki, aged-up (~23 yrs old), mina ashido x kirishima eijirou, fluff
word count. 1.9k words
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You check your watch for the umpteenth time, which now reads 6:29 PM. It hasn’t even been a minute since you last checked it, yet it feels like you’ve been waiting here for hours.
The ramen shop you’re waiting in front of and agreed to hang out at is slowly getting packed with people, tired businessmen and students alike eager to eat the day’s worries away and head home full and satisfied.
Rocking yourself on your feet, you chance another peek at your watch. You stare at it as the minute hand finally strikes the number 12. With a heavy sigh, you look up to find Bakugou walking towards you, hands in his pockets, just in time.
Of all things, the last thing you need him to be is punctual.
You stare at each other in awkward silence before warily exchanging hello’s.
Before Bakugou could even bring up the elephant in the room, you quickly explain, “I think everyone else is just running late.”
He nods silently, and in three strides, arrives at the spot to your left, all the while sparing a respectable distance between the two of you.
Clearing your throat, you look around at everything else but him. The ramen shop you chose as a group called Kikanbo is known for its signature ‘devil’ ramen—devil because of its (allegedly, hot and numbing) spiciness.
You were initially against it, not wanting to make a fool of yourself in front of Mina and Kirishima’s Pro Hero friends, but ultimately decided to go with the flow. The last thing you needed was for them to tease you about being self-conscious around Bakugou. Which you aren’t.
Suddenly, it dawns on you how suspiciously couple-looking you’re coming off right now. Giving Bakugou a quick once-over, he’s dressed in black joggers and a grey crewneck sweater, insulated by a thick, long coat. You internally sigh in relief at the sight of his baseball cap, which should shield his identity from prying eyes.
Though, you doubt his bulging muscles and piercing crimson eyes do much in terms of keeping a low profile.
While looking him up and down, he catches your eye. Embarrassed, you blurt out: “I’m gonna call Mina.”
Desperate to get away from his immediate radius, you don’t even wait for his acknowledgment before stepping away into a quiet corner. The phone rings three times before you’re greeted with a chirpy (too chirpy, if you were to be honest right now), sing-song voice.
“Hi, Y/N! What’s up?”
Twelve years of friendship and you still can’t believe this girl, “Mina? Where the fuck are you?! And everyone else?”
She has the nerve to guffaw, “Like I said, it won’t be like last time anymore! Tonight, it’s only gonna be you and—drum roll, please,” in the background, you hear someone—Kirishima, probably—imitating a drum, “Bakugou!”
Fuck. You can’t help but whimper, “You have to be kidding me.”
“Sorry, Y/N. We figured this is the only way we can get you guys to spend time together outside of just texting. By the way, you guys sure are going at a snail’s pace, huh?”
You can feel the blood rush to your face, “What? How’d you even—”
“Bye, bestie!” she cuts you off, “Have fun!”
“Be safe, bro!” Kirishima adds before she hangs up, leaving you slack-jawed and your heart going at 150 beats per minute.
When you turn back, you see Bakugou leaning with his back against the wall, a smirk decorating his features. What’s he all fucking smug about?
You reluctantly walk towards him, waving your phone for emphasis, “Did you know about this?”
“No,” the smirk has now been replaced with a subdued scowl, “but I put two and two together on the way here.”
And just like that, he drops the conversation. He simply makes his way to the entrance and you follow suit, forced to deal with all the implications by yourself.
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Just like the dinner from two weeks ago, it turns out that hanging out with Bakugou isn’t so bad after all.
After ruefully accepting the fact that you both got absolutely betrayed and stood up by your best friends, you entered the ramen shop and got seated on the stools facing the chefs. You ended up going for the regular level spices, or futsu futsu, while Bakugou went all in and ordered the devil ramen or oni mashi.
He barked a laugh at how your eyes bugged out the moment you saw how red his broth is. Instead of challenging you to a spice-off, though, he simply offered you the first sip (which stunned you—you didn’t expect him to make such a courteous gesture). Grateful, you took his offer.
You shouldn’t have, though.
You ended up choking so hard, alarming everyone in the restaurant, and Bakugou had to keep in his snort (that was surely gonna be loud and attract even more attention) in favor of getting you some milk to wash it off.
Once you recovered, you went on to eat your dinner, talking about the kinds of things you’ve conversed about over daily texts. Real-life conversation with Bakugou, to your pleasant surprise, is easy and free-flowing.
Contrary to how he’s depicted in media and your first impression of him from that run-in in the middle of your commute home from university, Bakugou is thoughtful and considerate. Sometimes brash, yes, but never mean.
He also seems to be genuinely interested in what you have to say, mindful of shifting the conversation from revolving around his hero work to asking about how’s post-grad these days, or if there’s anything eventful that happened in Manual’s agency earlier, seeing as how’s today’s a Saturday, the day on which you work part-time as admin staff.
You couldn’t school the surprised expression on your face fast enough at his remembering, and a small, somewhat self-satisfied smile took over his lips at your reaction. You probably, maybe, could’ve died a happy person then and there, but you kept yourself in check.
Soon after the bowls were clean of delicious ramen and bills were paid, you then headed out and decided to walk in the cool night breeze, with Bakugou taking the lead.
Which is how you wound up here, in a somewhat populated park that you’ve never heard of, sitting on the bench overlooking the view and in comfortable silence.
“So,” you start, admiring the scenery (first; second, avoiding eye contact), “do you usually go here?”
He grunts in response, “Yeah. Though I usually stroll around alone, instead of…” he gestures awkwardly toward your direction.
You struggle to contain your chuckle. How can he be so domineering in the field yet so bunglesome when talking to you? It’s endearing, to say the least.
“But you have brought some over here, have you?” you look around again, inspecting the greenery, the stone infrastructure, the lights. “This place is so beautiful.”
“I have,” he starts, “I think I’ve jogged with Dunce-face and Bug Eyes here once.”
You snort at the nicknames he calls his friends, “Dunce-face? Are you referring to Kaminari when he—”
He smirks, “Yep.”
You can’t help but laugh out loud, and he joins in with a snicker.
“But wait,” you look at him, “I meant have you brought over a girl over here before?”
You mentally slap yourself for uttering the question before thinking it through, undertones and all. Bakugou’s eyes widen a bit, but his face remains controlled. If he’s masking his knee-jerk reaction, you’re thankful for it.
“I mean,” you peer amongst the people who are enjoying the night air with you, “Most of the people here are in pairs—couples, because of how romantic the place is at night, with all the light fixtures and all.” You shrug, “I’m sure any girl would appreciate being brought here.”
You sure as hell are hoping you’re coming off more as the ‘helpful-friend-giving-some-well-meaning-advice’ than the ‘jealous-bitch-who’s-crazy-over-past-girls’.
He huffs, and you’re starting to think you’ve overstepped his boundaries when he cuts off your train of thought. Hell—railroads you and leaves your mind embarrassingly blank.
“Actually, this is the first time I’ve ever been on a date. At least,” he snorts, “the one-on-one kind.”
Suddenly, a million questions start racing through your mind.
He’s considering this a date? Did he consider the fiasco from last time a double date? This is his first? What?! How?! Why did he bring you here, anyway? Does he think of you in that way…? How can he be so bashful yet so straightforward at the same time? How the fuck is he so cute?
All these very important (some outright silly) questions, but the one you pipe up with is: “But back then—you agreed when I said you had a lot of experience—how?”
“I grunted, dumbass. There’s a difference. I wasn’t about to tell ya how inexperienced I was in this sort of thing when you were hyping me up like no other.”
“Huh.”
He side-eyes you, “From the looks of it, I’d say you’re the one who’s had far more experience.”
You’re too embarrassed to admit the truth, and too dizzy from the implications of his statements, but you figured you owed him at least your honesty. Looking down at your clasped hands, you mumble under your breath, “This is actually my first time, too.”
Silence falls upon the two of you, and unlike earlier, it’s filled with budding anticipation rather than comfort. You finally will yourself to look up, only to see him red. Red all over—neck, ears, and face.
Redder than when he slurped down that monstrous broth from earlier.
Then it hits you.
What Mina said was…real.
She sure as hell omits some truths, concerningly more often than not, but she never lies to you.
You can’t help but let out a soft laugh, and he turns away at the sound, perhaps in embarrassment.
You smile, “For the record, I’m glad you’re my first.”
At that, he abruptly stands up, and for a second you’re thinking you ruined the moment by saying that, but you don’t get to wish for the ground to swallow you up whole because Bakugou looks back at you with a fierce determination in his eyes that makes your mind go hazy.
“Come on,” he holds out his hand, “I wanna make sure this is the best fucking first date you’re ever gonna have.”
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Bonus:
(as he’s walking you home from the park)
“Wait, so am I the first person you’ve been texting, too?”
“Yes. Now quit yapping about this ‘first’ shit or I’ll make you.”
You laugh good-naturedly, “But you’re so good at it! The pacing, the withholding of information to keep them wanting more—I was convinced you’ve done this with a million other people.”
He sighs in what you think is fake exasperation, as his cheeks are tinted with a faint red, “For the billionth time, you’re my first. And,” he looks away, “I had Shitty-hair help me out a bit.”
Normally, you’d extinguish any and all species of butterflies in your stomach brought to existence by a boy because you can’t afford to get distracted right now.
But, today isn’t normal.
You, instead, let the grin that’s been fighting to take over your face the entire evening finally win over. You can’t help it—hearing that from anyone—especially Bakugou, makes you happy.
You continue walking in comfortable silence until he’s the one to break it.
“So,” he starts and you don’t even have to look at him to know there’s a smirk adorning his goddamn handsome face, “all sorts of company, huh?”
“Shut up.”
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tagging. @wolfunderthethree @bakugo-dee @poemzcheng @fallingmoon02 @eksd @niiine @gold24fish @animehoe666 @distinguishedlight
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alonetimelover · 8 months
Note
I was wondering if you could write Harry kissing reader lips all the times. No matter where or with whom. During sex or doing domestic things pls
pairing: boyfriend!Harry x reader
summary: Harry's love language is physical touch, but especially showering you with kisses. Here are just a few types of them.
warnings: Suggestive content (alluding to smut, but nothing explicit, alluding to reader being submissive), lots of kisses.
a/n: Just boyfriendrry and his obsession with your lips. No specific trope of mine here, just cuteness overload. Thank you for requesting!!!
masterlist taglist
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At the beginning of your relationship Harry tried not to be overly all over you. He didn’t like the word clingy but he was the equivalent to it. In the dictionary, there could be his photo next to the definition of the word. But he tried to repress the urge to just touch your arm when you were sitting on the couch, holding your hand at all times while strolling all those World’s streets, keeping his hand on your thigh while driving, caressing your hair while you tried to fall asleep late at night, massaging your sore shoulders after coming home to him after work, or just squeezing you tight whenever he was passing you. He tried to repress it, making you wonder if there was something bad going on. 
“What is your love language, Harry?” You finally asked him, while watching one of the movies from your TBW (to be watched) list. It was yet another time when he sat a metre away from you, as if you were contagious. It got you thinking. 
“Why the question?” 
“It’s just, I can’t crack it. I feel like you appreciate all of them but not one from what I do is your favourite. It’s just, I just want to cherish you the way you want to be,” you explained, now sitting sideways on the couch, face to face with Harry. 
Harry breathed heavily, “well, I didn’t think I had one. I learned to do things that my partners appreciated and roll with it.”
“You mean none of your partners asked you the question?” 
“Is that a usual question you ask?”
“I do. I mean, don’t you want to know what your partner appreciates and what they don’t like? I think the best way is to ask. It’s not only for pleasure but for creating boundaries. Those are as important.”
Now, Harry was thinking. One of the most important things he wanted to do in all of his relationships during the years was making his partners feel good, appreciated, and most importantly secure. He didn’t want them to be scared or not comfortable or even not sure about his feelings. And he now realised, you weren’t sure. 
“I think it’s physical touch,” he finally said. 
Well, that shut you up. And it did for a while, so Harry started to worry if you even heard him. 
“Yeah, I heard you. I’m just,” you stopped for a moment. “Just surprised, I guess. I’m glad I asked.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Well, now that I know,” you prolonged the last word and moved on your knees, crawling towards Harry. 
“What are you- oh!”
In seconds you were making yourself comfortable, laying down on Harry, head on his chest, one of your legs wrapping around his and arms embracing his waist, making him stop talking. 
“I love physical touch. Please don’t hold yourself back anymore,” you whispered in his chest, not wanting to strain away from his warmth. 
“Just tell me when I’m too clingy.” Harry kissed the top of your head. 
“I will. It’s gonna be okay when we communicate,” you explained and added, “you have something else you want to do more as a couple?”
“Kisses,” he now said without hesitation, confident with his feelings and needs. Coming clear to you. 
“Oh, the more you know, the more you know.” 
So you spent the rest of your evening sharing kisses, touches and sweet nothings. Now sure about each other more than ever. 
From the moment that conversation happened very early on your relationship, the physical touch was an indispensable part of it. It was everything from light touches under the table during all of the dinners you had in the public and holding hands while doing groceries to kissing you breathless against the door after coming home from a party, where you’d been teasing him throughout the whole night. 
And those kisses and any other type of them were Harry’s favourite way of saying ‘I love you’ even when those words were not apparent in your relationship’s vocabulary. 
At the beginning, the surprising kisses, being placed on your lips on any unexpected moment during your meetings were his favourite. 
“You really can't just not scare me any time we see each other, eh?" you finally asked him, hand on your heart and trying to steady your breathing. 
"I'm so sorry, baby. I'll do it softer next time," Harry promised, wrapping his hands around you and turning you so he could properly see your face. 
"Softer? How about without giving me a near heart attack experience?" 
"Mhmm." 
But those words really just went in one ear and left through the other. Harry had something much greater to concentrate on. Your lips, smeared with tomato sauce you'd been preparing to go with dinner, were just a thing he gazed at. 
"You're not listening." 
"Of course, baby." 
Just the way your lips were moving with the upper lip extra red made him answer not knowing what. He just wanted to drown into the endless waterfall of your kisses. 
“Okay, great! That’s why I was thinking about breaking up. It just seems to be not working, you know?” You tested him, if your prediction of him not being actually there in front of you, was true. 
“Yes, baby.” 
Bingo. He was not listening. 
“Harry, do you realise that we just broke up?” 
Now, he was listening. You used his name. How could you use his actual name and not one of the established nicknames. You used ‘Harry’ and he now knew you meant business. 
“What?”
“Oh, now you're listening! Great! Uhmm - I am making a spaghetti bolognese and need you to taste the sauce. It’s just missing something,” you said like not a minute ago you didn’t use the words ‘break up’ and ‘Harry’ in one sentence. 
“Wait a minute. What ‘break up’?”
“Oh, you heard that?”
“Well, you called me Harry! Of course I heard what was said later.”
“That’s your name, love,” you teased, turning to the pan, stirring the sauce. 
“That’s,” he emphasised. “That’s my name. Love, baby, my sweetest boyfriend, sexy, hottie. Whatever. You know it.” He pouted, making his way between you and the stove, as to have your undivided attention. 
“Oh, is that true?” Teasing smile on your face, turning into a loving grin. 
“Yep.” He popped the ‘p’ and dived towards your face, giving you sweet three kisses on your lips in a way to say ‘I love you’ without using those heavy words. 
And somehow even after being used to saying ‘I love you’ all the time, those three kisses meaning those words stayed in your relationship ritual. Whenever he was leaving for tour - three kisses -, whenever you went to visit your family - three kisses -, whenever you stayed at home and he was going to the store - three kisses -, right before falling asleep - three kisses. It was just engraved in you both. 
“I’ll see you in two weeks,” you said for the third time, assuring him. 
“That’s too long.” He grimaced. “Can’t you just go with me?”
You laughed, “of course I can’t. I have a job, and I promised mum I would spend some time back home. And then,” you placed both of your arms around his neck, placing your hands in his overgrown locks. “And then I am joining you.” 
Harry smiled, leaning in and placing his warm lips on your cold ones, making your breath hitched. No matter how many of those kisses you shared, each and every one of them, no matter how long or how needy they were, made you stumble and felt like it was the very first time he stole your breath away. 
He was cursing himself in his mind, when the kiss grew very heavy and needy. When your hands pulled on his hair just the way he liked, and his knee was going right where you wanted. His hands slowly moved under your baggy shirt, sending shivers down your spine. His cold fingers slowly stroke your lower back and hips, then making their way just under your ass, so he could hold you up. 
“Your plane is leaving in two hours, baby,” you said breathlessly, when Harry plastered your neck with some tiny and some mark-leaving kisses. 
“Mhm, don’t care.”
“You’ll hate yourself if you’re not early enough at the airport.”
“Ugh,” he groaned. “How are you always right and rational even when I am very prominently trying for you to forget about everything, huh?” 
He placed you back on your feet, now stroking your cheeks with his thumbs, gazing into your eyes, searching for any sign of ‘keep doing what you’ve been doing for the past five minutes’. Finding none. 
“Need to put that on my resume,” you joked. 
“If you were working for me? Sure. For anybody else? Uh, uh. Don’t need others thinking about you like this,” he whispered, eyeing you up and down. 
“Possessive, are we?”
“Nah.” He shook his head. “Just in love.”
You smiled at him, and placed those final three kisses on his awaiting and slightly swollen lips. 
“I’ll see you soon. I love you.”
“I’ll miss you. I love you.”
Like in each and every relationship there were times where you didn’t agree on certain things. Times when you argued. Times when you had silent days. And during those silent days, Harry still, a little bit proud and sometimes with a bruised ego, didn’t want to speak. But he couldn’t live without kissing you. As confusing as it was, you appreciated that. Even though you both were angry at each other, or disappointed in one another, or too proud to admit that the other was right - you would never refuse his kisses. 
Well, you once tried. 
“I don’t want you to kiss me,” you said seriously, immediately going back to reading your novel.
Harry’s brows scrunched and he cleared his throat. That hurt more than the argument, he thought. But he wouldn’t say it. He was mad and promised himself, childishly, to give you a silent treatment. It was a one time situation that he never redid. 
So he sat down next to you on the couch and waited patiently for you to speak up. He waited for hours till the moment you finished a part of a book that you had promised yourself you’d do. Then, you closed it and turned towards him. 
“Are you going to talk to me now?”
He sighed, placing one hand on your knee, squeezing it gently. 
“I’m sorry.”
“I am too.” 
“For the argument and the silence that I thought would be the best,” Harry resumed his apology after you said yours. “I know, we agreed on communicating. I’m sorry.”
“We’ll do it next time. No one said that we are perfect and are going to stick to the plan all the time. Mistakes are going to happen, probably more frequently than not. It’s just the way humans, we, are.”
Harry smiled as you started stroking his cheek lovingly. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. 
“And you were right,” he added. “My ego couldn’t take it.”
“I understand. Mine couldn’t either. We need to keep each other in check, shouldn’t we?”
“Yes. But I have one request.” 
You encouraged him to continue by nodding your hand. 
“Never, and I really mean it, never refuse my kisses. It hurt me more than anything ever. No matter how angry we are at each other, just promise me, you won’t refuse a kiss from me.”
If it was possible your eyes would immediately flow with tears and sobs would come out of your mouth. Harry was too good and sweet for this world. And his obsession with kisses just added up to his lovingness in an attempt to make sure you knew how loved you were. 
“Promise.”
And you sealed that promise with a sweet kiss. 
There was one more special type of a kiss that Harry provided you with. One that just screamed: bedroom. Or, you know, just let’s go and be alone with each other. It was discreet so whenever you were in public, or with your family or friends, they wouldn’t know what was going on. 
It was very simple. Harry would look like whispering something in your ear, but in reality he was kissing and sometimes slightly grazing the skin right under with his teeth, showering your body with goosebumps. 
The first time he did that was in his bed, no one was around, just you and him. You were lying for him, just the way he wanted you to. In the middle of the bed, pillow under your head to make you comfortable and hands placed underneath it to forbid you of touching. You laid there at his mercy watching as he moved around the room in just his dress pants - belt forgotten on the floor (already done with its job), button and zipper open, his underwear peeking. 
He finally stopped walking, standing at the end of the bed, right in front of you. Holding both of your ankles in each hand he moved them apart, placing them just far enough so he could fit between your legs. With eyes locked into yours, he kneeled on the bed, kissed one and then the second of your knees still not averting his gaze from you. Your breath hitched, a moan daring to escape your lips. 
“Don’t hold it in. I want to hear you, sweet girl,” Harry said. 
Of course he noticed the shallow and rapid breaths, warm skin and shy gaze from you. He noticed how you were forbidding him from hearing your voice, hearing how good he made you feel even though he barely touched you today. He needed to know your every thought and feeling right now. 
He smirked when you moaned after he squeezed and then caressed your inner thigh. 
Finally, to end your misery and yearning, he leaned down, bearing down on one of his forearms. His face daring closer and closer to yours, edging you endlessly. You wanted to just grab his head and kiss him right this moment, but knew that wouldn’t lead you to any good. You learned your lesson the hard way.
“Now,” he started, his face just inches away from your ear. “I think I can start to properly thank you, huh?” 
You gulped, not knowing if the noise that would come out of your mouth would be a coherent sentence (a simple ‘yes’) or a loud, needy moan. You knew Harry would encourage you to speak up. He needed to hear you and he could wait more to just hear those three letters. 
“Words, sweet girl. I need to hear you saying it.” 
His hand once again moved to your thigh, his fingertips tickling your skin, so delicate, so familiar and needed. He was testing you, almost as he wanted you to fail his little test, wanting to see you crumble underneath him. 
“Yes, yes. Please.” 
He grinned, and it had nothing to do with a teasing smirk he liked to send your way nor the teasing smile he flashed you from time to time. That grin was just perfection, like showing your entire love on your hand, giving it away to that one and only. 
And then he kissed that spot for the very first time. And you weren’t silent, loudly giving him a pointer that it was a way to see you fall apart from the simplest of pleasures. 
“Mhmm,” he chuckled. “I’m gonna use it more from now on.”
a/n: a little challenge for myself to write something more intimate. i hope you liked it!
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rafesfavgirl · 17 days
Text
stop asking me to stay — r. cameron
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❝ please don't fall apart i can't face your breaking heart i'm trying to be brave stop asking me to stay ❞
pairing: bf!rafe x fem!reader
context: you and rafe have been dating for seven months, and while the relationship started it out well, as soon as the honeymoon phase ended (about 3 months in), everything went to shit. you've been trying to put up with it, but tonight, you realize you've had enough.
words: 1.4k+
warnings: toxic relationship, cocaine use, alcohol use, attachment issues, might make you cry, no happy ending, angst asf
you walk out into the backyard full of girls in swimsuits and guys in swim trunks with drinks in hand, strobes of light flashing around, and music blasting, hoping to find your dear boyfriend who had disappeared on you. again.
god, how much longer did he think you were gonna put up with this?
you look around, and head for topper when you spot him. he was playing pong against kelce and some of their other golf buddies.
"top," you call out to him when you walk up to the table to join them.
"hey, y/n," he greets you, as he readies his hand to shoot a ball. he does, and it lands in one of the cups, causing the surrounding guys and girls to erupt in cheers. "what's up?"
"have you seen rafe?" you ask him.
"nah, not lately," he shook his head at you, shooting his other ball.
he misses that one.
you snap your head towards kelce. "kelce?"
"last i saw him he was cutting a line in the living room upstairs, y/n," he shrugs, and you groan, rolling your eyes.
of course he was. fucking fantastic.
you don't even say another word to either of them before you walk away and head back towards the house. you manage your way through the crowd just fine and scurry up the stairs to the second floor.
just as kelce described, you find rafe seated on a couch in the living room surrounded by some guys and girls—one who was a little too close to him for your liking—cutting a line of coke with his black card.
"rafe," you say his name, and his head snaps up at the sound of your voice, his dark blue eyes meeting yours. 
he immediately stands up, pretending as if you didn't just see him cutting the line of coke with his card, shaking off the girl draped over his arm in the process. "y/n."
"can you take me home?" you ask, pulling your eyes away from his. you just couldn't stand to look in them anymore. "i have that interview with the admissions officer from yale tomorrow."
"yeah," he nods, rounding the coffee table to approach you. "whatever you want, baby."
everyone else eyes the two of you carefully, the girl previously draped over rafe giving you the stink eye. no one could ever pull rafe away from the coke faster than you.
when he stops to stand in front of you to block your view of the "friends" he left snorting lines of coke, you look up at him through your lashes, not knowing what to think.
"i've been looking for you for an hour," you say, and he sighs.
"i'm sorry," he replied—you were sick of hearing that though. it was the same half-assed apology every time. and yet, nothing ever changed.
you'd probably go through this exact thing again next weekend when he drags you to some other party.
"save it," you say, catching him off guard.
he knew you didn't like it when did coke, but you never stopped him from apologizing before.
"just take me home," you turn around and walk away from him, making your way back downstairs.
he follows closely behind you, but falls behind a little when you quickly course your way through the crowd on the first floor and he struggles to do the same.
"y/n, wait up," he jogs to catch up to you when you both step outside, but you just quicken your pace towards his car. "babe!"
you hear him call after you, and since his legs are much longer than yours, he manages to catch up and walk in front of you, stopping you in your tracks.
"can you just stop for a second?" he asks, placing both of his hands on either of your arms to make you look at him. "what's wrong?"
"do you even have to ask?"
he sighs, and drops his hands from your arms. "okay, so i snorted a line. what's the big deal?"
"was it just a line, rafe?" you asked, knowing he could never just stop at one.
"so maybe it was two or three," he admits with a shrug. "but what's the big deal? we're at a party, y/n. we came here to have fun!"
"you think this is fun?" you ask him, the pent up anger caused by the way he's been acting the last few months rising to the surface. "it is not fun for me to come with you to these parties only to find you've abandoned me after i go to the bathroom to go snort lines of coke, rafe! let alone find some girl draped all over you and you don't even seem to care!"
"oh for fuck's sake, it's not like i'm sneaking off to fuck them, y/n!" he defended. "they do that shit on their own. what do you expect me to do about that?"
"uh, i don't know, tell them to fuck off? to get off you? to stop? to move?" you say, stating several different things he could have said to them.
he knows your right, but as always, he refused to back down.
"god, are you seriously bitching about this?" his voice was louder know, the adrenaline from the coke clouding his judgment and riling him up. "wait- no, that's-" 
he immediately realized what he just said to you, and though he wanted to take it back—and even tried to—it was too late.
"you know what? just go back inside, rafe," you shrug, finally giving up.
there was no use fighting back anymore because you were never gonna get through to him. not when he was like this—coked out of his mind.
"go back to your coke buddies, go back to whatever girl decides to throw herself onto you next, and just forget about me," you tell him. "i'm done."
his coke-induced state of mind seems to fade completely when he hears those two words come out of your mouth.
"what?" his voice was much quieter now, and delicate. something not usual for rafe.
"you heard me," you said, looking him in the eyes. "i can't keep doing this, rafe."
"no, no, no, no, no," he shakes his head frantically, panic clearly building up in him at the thought of losing you. he closes the distance between the two of you and takes your hands in his. "i promise i'll do better, baby. i'll change. i love you."
as much as you wanted to give in and believe him, you knew that your relationship had run its course. he did love you—you never doubted that. but it shouldn't have to be this hard. enough was enough.
you needed to do what was best for you, and this just wasn't it anymore. as much as you loved him, you knew this was the best thing for you. no matter how badly it broke your heart, you had to walk away.
"not enough to choose me," you shook your head, tears threatening to well up in your eyes. "you give in every time."
he drops your hands from his, his demeanor changing again. now, he looked furious. cold. meaner.
"well, i'm sorry i'm not fucking perfect like you!" his voice was full of venom. the rafe cameron you fell in love with was gone. "you know what? just do what you want, y/n. go run off to yale and find some perfectly polished guy! see if i care."
his eyes filled with disgust as he trailed them over you, a scoff leaving his mouth, "i should've just fucked all those other girls. at least they know how to have fun."
while you knew he wouldn't take your words well, you never expected him to be so cruel. but then again, wasn't it always this way? when he was off of it, you never really knew what to expect.
another reason why you had to walk away. it wasn't worth all the exhaustion going back and forth with him. he wasn't worth it anymore.
"go ahead," you say, trying your hardest to keep a solid front. no way you were going to give him the satisfaction of seeing you break.
he rolled his eyes. "find your own way home, bitch," he spat, bumping your shoulder as he walked back towards the house.
the second you knew he could no longer see you, you break.
the rafe you knew was gone.
part 2.
reblogs and comments are deeply appreciated <33
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amyminhminh · 25 days
Text
⋆*・゚ You ⋆ ☾*・゚:
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Tags: Wanderer x reader, gn!reader
Summary: Wanderer misses your presence while you are away and fortunately, you come back home.
──────────────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ────────────────
Wanderer flipped the pages begrudgingly, his tired eyes drooping under the dim light.
Kusanali had made him write more theses more often lately, and not to mention his additional work of helping the young god around Sumeru. Everything was taking a toll on him and he didn’t like it one bit.
His beloved was out at that time. He missed your presence. Your sweet scent. Your voice… Your everything. He just wanted to see your small form slipping through the door of your shared home, tip-toeing on the floor boards to surprise him. He craved to feel your arms wrapping around his shoulders as he finally relaxed in your embrace. That way, he wouldn’t have to worry about anything else.
“Hah…”
Puppets like him don’t experience exhaustion, yet his eyes threatened to close at any given moment. He didn’t want to write theses anymore. The only thing he wanted then was you. And you alone.
He was in a trance, thinking of you. He could feel the presence of your arms snaking their way on his tensed shoulder blades, hugging him from behind. Your intoxicatingly sweet smell tickled his senses. He breathed out in a huff.
“Boo.”
His eyes snapped open as he tensed up. He let his guard down. He would and had never let his guard down like that. But he did.
A head appeared in view and he froze like a statue. He would have activated his vision and attacked at that moment, but his body refused to move.
The thought went away as soon as he recognized the face that he had been yearning for.
“What’s got you so tense? Missed me so much?”
Your eyelashes fluttered at the sight of him working on his theses. He hated writing them but he just couldn’t bring himself to reject Lesser Lord Kusanali. Everytime complaints escaped from his lips, you would always ruffle his hair, treating him like a little kid throwing a tantrum over spilled ice cream. But what a sweetheart you were. You would often offer help if you had time, and he appreciated that.
You were always so kind, so understanding… to everyone. Even to strangers. It made him worry about your safety whenever you had the need to go outside without him. And having been betrayed three times in his life, he wanted you to show your kindness towards only him.
Sometimes he just wanted to lock you up in the house to protect you. To love you. To have all your affection for himself.
“Wanderer? Whatcha thinking about?”
Your voice snapped him out of his thoughts. Slapping himself internally, he sighed at the overflowing thoughts circling around his artificial mind. He needed to stop with his possessiveness. It reminded him of…
Nevermind. It seemed like he stayed silent for too long.
“Nothing. Just brainstorming some ideas for theses.”
On your plump lips plastered a smile. The same smile he had adored from the first time he met you.
“You seem tired. You should take a rest. And don’t pull the ‘I’m a puppet, I don’t feel tired!’ on me. You sound like that adeptus from Liyue I know.”
Liyue? Adeptus? There you went, going around all places and meeting new people. Not like he could stop you. But he just couldn’t help the jealousy bubbling up inside his body, urging him to take action. Though he wouldn’t do things like those characters in novels. Yanderes… if he recalled correctly. The novel he had read was published by the Yae Publishing House. Yeah, Inazuma. He knew. But he had to admit the writing style was quite… enthralling to say the least. And a bit provocative, he had to add. All of the phrasing in the book made his mind wander to a certain fox…
Back to the point, all of the yandere’s actions were what his Fatui self would do. He as Wanderer would not cage you inside and punish you for being too close to others.
Or would he?
“Hey, you seem out of it today. What’s wrong? Are the theses’ topics too hard to work on? You know what, I’m taking these. You need rest and I, myself will guard by your side so you can have your beauty sleep!”
Your lips touched the tip of his ear like gentle sakura petals fluttering down in the start of spring. The soft breathing of yours sent pleasant vibrations to his body.
“And I’m not taking ‘no’ for an answer!”
For a moment, your lips fluttered against his forehead, then his nose, then his cheek. You kissed everywhere on his pale porcelain face. Your kisses were coaxing him to sleep. But you left his lips alone. As if you were teasing him, you didn’t even bother eyeing them.
“Alright. I will freshen up and join you in bed.”
Wait. No kiss?
He could not believe it. His hand rushed to take hold of your wrist and twirled you around to meet his face. Time seemed to slow down as he smashed his lips onto yours, feeling your breath hitch among light gasps.
Two bodies squished up to one another on the sofa. The house was only brightened up by small lamps, competing with the twinkling of the stars in the vast dark sky he once called fake. Beautiful as it was, it could not compare to the sight of you leaning onto him, wrapping your arms around his neck, head leaning back as he peppered featherlight kisses on your neck.
He was suppressing his desire to just throw you on the soft sheets and bury his head into the crook of your neck, inhaling your sweet scent that had his mind go hazy. He could not deny that the presence of you being there had boosted his energy somewhat. The strange grogginess had disappeared the second you came in. He wanted you so badly that it was hurting. But he needed to consider the fact that you had just come home, your rest was necessary. Perhaps he would have to wait until the next sun rose up…
“Wanderer…”
Lifting his head to look into your eyes, he gazed at you as if you were the most enchanting thing in the world. And you are.
“I love you.”
“So much.”
“What’s with the sudden affection?”
A chuckle rose from your throat as his eyes bore into yours, twinkling in the warm light.
“I love you, too. Now, come on… don’t you want me to freshen up? Let go, you big man baby… Actually, minus the big part-”
Before he could react, your frame sprung up from the couch and you sped to the bathroom, not forgetting to stick your tongue out at his face.
“I’m going to get you back for this…”
He huffed out with a sigh. Without noticing, the corners of his lips curled up into a slight smile. This was what he had always wanted. To love you.
And to be loved by you.
──────────────── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ────────────────
Word count: 1162 words
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bellawrites-kinda · 8 months
Text
a change in rules ; l.h.
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summary: we all know the FIA allowed lewis to wear his earrings and nose ring during his races, but what if him saying that he has another piercing somewhere else wasn’t a joke?
pairing: lewis hamilton x fem!reader
warnings: 18+ smut/nsfw, oral sex ( f receiving ), unprotected sex, size kink kinda, breeding kink ( ? ), a lil bit of possessiveness if you squint
word count: 1132
a/n: i saw a tiktok ab this & went to google a bit about it and like
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he did say it was a joke but yknow... what if !? also it does say that he wanted them to think that he had his balls pierced but i'm thinking more of a dick piercing like at his tip so... also this is pretty bad, i'm kinda new to writing but i tried !! so yeah i hope y'all like it, constructive criticism is appreciated 🫶🏼
-
you traced the outline of his tattoos, the dim lighting of your shared room making them ever so prominent. i love your tattoos so much, and your piercings too hands trailing down to rest on his toned abs, you focused your attention back on him
he smiled at you, and you felt the swarm of butterflies appear in your stomach. despite having been together for a year now, you always found yourself getting flustered over everything he did, from complimenting you, to merely going about his daily activities. he was your everything, and you were his.
i’m glad you like them he broke the silence, moving to press his lips against the skin of your neck i want to get more piercings, but i don’t think the FIA would be particularly fond of that, so his voice trailed off, now sucking on your neck lew... i thought you said you were tired- your voice cut off as you inhaled sharply, back arching off the bed slightly at his unrelenting mouth harshly sucking on your skin. he seemed desperate, desperate to mark you as his.
i missed you so much, baby. he murmured, voice low. missed your smile, missed your pretty face, missed this gorgeous body of yours, i missed all of you. the admission made your head spin, and you felt arousal flood your senses.
baby... we can do this tomorrow, it's late, you just got back, you need rest. you tried to stop him as his hands smoothed over the skin of your hips, the skimpy nightgown riding up. i've gone months without you, love, i can't take it anymore, please the desperation in his raspy voice was your downfall, stripping yourself of the nightgown and pulling him into a heated kiss. fuck.. you're so pretty he almost groaned as he positioned himself above you. your eyes rolled back as he kissed his way down your body, pressing wet, hot kisses on the inside of your thighs.
enough teasing lew, please you whined, getting impatient. please what baby, what do you want me to do he asked cockily, want you to eat me out, please you were practically begging. god, the effect this man had on you, the control he had over your body.
so polite he chuckled, before he shoved his head between your thighs, a few stray braids falling to frame his face. a high pitched moan left your throat as he sucked on your clit the same way he did your neck. fuck, yes, right there your eyes screwed shut as he slipped two fingers into you.
the combination of his mouth and fingers was heavenly, and considering you'd gone 2 whole months without feeling his touch, you were close already. baby, 'm close you managed to pant out in between moans.
your eyes flew open as he pulled away. want you to come on my cock he murmured, licking his fingers clean. you sat up, hands moving to pull his boxer-briefs off, his cock slapping his abs gently. you practically drooled as you wrapped your hand around the base. but what you saw was something you definitely didn't expect. your mouth fell open as you reached to gently smooth your finger over his pierced tip. you like it? he asked tentatively. i fucking love it, lew. oh my god you were breathless, awestuck by the way the piercing made his pretty cock even prettier.
you're so fucking hot my god... you praised before wrapping your lips around his tip, the cool metal of the piercing coming into contact with your tongue. but before you could take him deeper into your mouth, he'd pulled you off. need to be inside you he explained hastily as he practically manhandled you so that you were once again laying under him.
oh fuck the groan that left his lips as he pushed into you was nothing short of filthy. so fucking tight he breathed. fuck lew, please, i need more. you couldn't recognise your own voice, your brain was foggy from the pleasure coursing through your veins. he obliged, cock easily slipping all the way in you. he paused momentarily, giving you time to adjust to the sheer size of him.
you wrapped yourself around his body, hands resting on his back, legs wrapping around his waist and pulling him closer. a silent request for him to start moving. his thrusts were fast and hard, slamming his cock deep into you, and pulling out, leaving only his tip in you before slamming back in again.
the sounds the two of you were making was nothing short of filthy. your moans and his groans, the sound of skin against skin. you clenched around him when his fingers circled your clit harshly. lew i'm close, you gasped out. come for me baby, come all over my cock. his voice was strained. your walls spasmed as you came, back arching off the bed.
even then, he didn't stop, his thrusts only getting faster. his free hand moved to grab your hip, his grip so tight you were sure there would be a bruise there tomorrow. a sharp gasp left you as he lifted your hips slightly, the change in angle only making him slip even deeper into you.
you close again already princess? i can feel you clenching around me. he chuckled, a hint of mock lacing his voice. you couldn't form words anymore, anything you tried to say came out as a moan or a whine. i've got you baby, just let go he soothed. you could feel his movements faltering as they became sloppier.
want.. want you to cum in me you managed to stutter out. yeah? you want me to breed you? fuck a baby into you? you only managed a nod in response before you felt ropes of his warm cum fill you up, the sensation triggering your own orgasm. your walls clenched tightly around his cock, milking his cock dry.
your body was limp as he pulled out of you, lying beside you. so, when did you get it the question slipped out as soon as you'd caught your breath. i've been thinking about it for a while, got it a month and a half ago he chuckled. what happened to the FIA not being happy, hm? you teased i don't care if they like it or not, i mean, if they stop me from racing because of it, then so be it. you smiled at his response, wrapping your arms around him and shutting your eyes.
you do like it, right? he questioned nervously after some time. i love it. you reassured, pressing a kiss to the piercing on his nose. he only hummed, cuddling closer to you as the both of you slipped into a deep sleep.
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cashmoneyyysstuff · 2 months
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♡ chronicle #4 : welcome back ♡
wc : 5338
somehow, you've gotten used to living without your dragon man.
it shouldn't have been that hard to began with, you reason. since you'd only been living with him for a couple of weeks. you'd spent your whole life without this rude, bratty, infuriatingly handsome dragon guy. it really shouldn't have been hard.
you wake up to get ready for work feeling more tired than usual. this had been the case for the last two weeks now. you're lost at work, you've been really close to coming late more than once. you're coworker sachi has also asked if you were sick at least 5 times in one week, so you assume you don't exactly look your best right now.
you grab some leftovers from the fridge, hastily throwing them in the microwave to check up on your coffee. when you're done eating with the only background noise being the tv playing some game show reruns, you put your plate in the sink and remember a little too late that no one's there to clean them up for you anymore. you feel stupid, staring at the dishes like they'll suddenly wash themselves.
you'll wash them when you get back.
work goes by in a blur. you hardly remember what you did, who you'd talked to or what you had for lunch. the trip back home feels unfamiliar, like someone else was controlling your body for you. you don't mind as long as you can go home and sleep.
when you walk through your door, you check your couch reflexively, even though you've reminded yourself multiple times no one would be waiting there for you. the tv's turned off like it was when you'd left, there's nothing cooking on the stove, and there's no one on your couch.
despite reminding yourself.
you really need some sleep.
you order take out and eat while watching your favorite show for the 5000th time. it feels boring instead of comforting like it usually is, so you end up skipping a bunch of episodes straight to your favorite.
sometimes, you feel like it was all one big dream. falling in love with a dragon only for him to leave you seemed like something you could really only see in your own fantasy. but you know it isn't, because if it were you'd be able to forget about it. about him. but you can't.
it isn't painful, it doesn't feel like your heart is about to burst. it just feels so lonely. you feel like a part of you is missing, like a piece of your heart was filled to the brim with warmth only for that part to be taken away from you and leaving you cold and hollow. you don't like feeling like this. you shouldn't feel like this over someone you'd technically just met.
but it wasn't like that with him, it didn't feel like you'd just met. despite only living with him for a few weeks, you felt like you'd known him all your life. it was like you were catching up with an old friend the more you spoke to him. everything in you felt good with him. everything felt so right with him.
before you know it there are tears clouding your vision, you will yourself not to let them overflow. you hadn't cried since the day he left, you'd been distracting yourself with work not to. your favorite part of the episode comes up yet all you can do is focus on not bursting into tears. you can't go to bed feeling like shit since you've got work tomorrow. you decide to head to bed early tonight.
you'd like to think you can fool yourself into believing you've gotten used to living without katsuki. but unfortunately, you have to admit you aren't that good at lying to yourself when the first teardrop hits your pillow.
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katsuki feels incredibly wrong.
it's way past the time he's usually asleep, but despite tossing and turning he can't keep his eyes shut because every time he does he sees you.
you, with your stupid bright smile. you with your stupid puffed out cheeks and pout when you'd caught him nabbing your food too late. you with your bright eyes when you come back from work to see he's made your favorite.
and you, with your glossy wet eyes when he told you he was leaving.
he really needs some fuckin' sleep.
for the last two weeks, he's been telling himself that this was better for you—for you both. he knows he could never truly be good for you. no matter how well he'd learn to cook your favorite meal. no matter how many movies and tv shows you watch together. no matter how good it feels to be with you, you'll always be a human and he, a dragon.
you're different beings made for different lives. he wasn't raised for battle, but it is a primary part of the dragon code, especially in his faction. survival of the fittest and whatnot. you were made for office jobs and midnight take out and romance movies, not for anything he was.
his friends were more than happy to see he'd finally come back home. they had basically choke-slammed him to the ground to hug him, and he can't deny he felt really a little bit happy to see them again.
he'd expected his mom to nag his ear off like she usually does but he was more than shocked to feel her wrap her arms around him tightly. she had told him she was happy to see he hadn't caused any trouble for himself and he could hear the quiver in her voice and feel the slight shakiness in her tightly strung limbs. he hadn't said anything and simply quietly held her back. his father had joined the group hug soon after and katsuki closed his eyes, indulging in the warmth of his parents' love.
this is good. this feels nice. this is where he's supposed to be.
it felt nice at the time, he recalls. but it didn't feel right.
for the last two weeks, he's been trying to tell himself that despite how much he aches, how much he yearns for you, you aren't made for him.
unfortunately, besides admitedly being a horrible liar, katsuki will forever be a selfish dragon. he only focuses on what he wants, and he wants you more than anything. he needs you more than anything.
" fuck this.." he mutters, throwing and arm over his eyes. he starts absentmindedly rubbing at his hair, like you used to. but it doesn't feel as comforting, so he huffs again.
he'd been told he unfortunately couldn't do anything about the tournament, but on a better note the guy he faced off again would be disqualified from participating since he did end up getting something from a witch, like katsuki thought. kirishima had wrapped an arm around his shoulder and told him it was a good thing. but to be honest, katsuki had almost fully forgotten about that shitty tournament. his father told him there would always be a next one. the next one in ten years. the thought of not seeing you in that time crosses his mind at makes him feel like he swallowed something sour. there's a bitter taste in his mouth at the thought but he can do nothing but try to ignore it.
just as he's about to turn to the other side of his bed when a knock his door startles him. his mom walks in shortly after, opening the door halfway before walking in when she sees him awake.
" i didn't say you could come in." he grumbles half heartedly, sleep riddled voice slightly groggy. mitsuki simply sits on his bed near him, patting at his leg over the covers.
"m'not allowed to check up on my runaway son ? don't want you to leave again." she jests. katsuki knows she's joking, but he still feels a pang of guilt in his chest. he grumbles something unintelligible in response.
no words are exchanged for a moment, then mitsuki pats her son's leg a little harder, he snarls at her but she simply smiles at him.
"what do you say we go get some air ?"
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the night air feels good.
soaring through the sky feels comforting. feeling the way the wind rushes through his scales feels almost therapeutic to him. it can be thrilling to soar through the air the same way it can also be calming. it provides him serenity he can't quite put into words.
katsuki finds himself wishing he could fly like this with you like when he brought you back home from work. he remembers how you'd screamed your lungs out, clutched onto him so tightly and when you'd landed back home with wobbly legs and messy..everything, you'd proclaimed it was the first and last time you'd ever go for a dragon ride. he remembers how hard he laughed and he chuffs to himself unconsciously at the memory.
flying around when he was irritated or stressed wasn't uncommon for him but he only remembers a handful of times he'd went flying with his mother. other than the times he was younger and still learning how to get the hang of it. he has to admit that that feels good, too.
they decide to rest on a nearby mountain they saw in the horizon. as soon as they land katsuki changes back into his human form, stretching as he let's out a yawn. the only remaining traces of his dragon form being his red horns and scaley tail accompanied by large red wings. he hears his mom flap her wings behind him as she also let's out a little yawn of her own. she sits down onto the gravely bottom and katsuki raises a brow before taking a spot next to her.
it's quiet as they both silently stare at the moon. it's a little chilly out but katsuki doesn't mind much.
"so," mitsuki sighs, taking a large gulp of the fresh air " you gonna tell me what happened when you went on your little expedition?" she bumps her shoulder with his playfully, katsuki growls but doesn't snap back like he usually would.
he simply shrugs "it wasn't an expedition." he gulps, it feels like a knot grows in his throat. "it wasn't anything." he doesn't notice the way his hands are tightened into fists, but his mother does.
"that so ?" she utters. she speaks in a nurturing way. that soft tone that only a mother could use for her child. it upset him even more as the knot in his throat tightens.
"i.." katsuki starts "i was around a lot of humans.." he admits. his mother hums in response, urging him to continue. "saw a lot of things, tried a lot of human stuff."
"human stuff ?"
"human foods and desserts and stuff. and movies. they're people moving around acting inside a big box that they call a tv." he tries his best to explain it in the simplest way considering it took him a while to grasp the concept of electronics himself. he can tell his mother doesn't really understand, but he's thankful she simply nods and let's him continue.
"it wasn't too bad." he concedes. " i didn't wanna kill too many of them." he jokes, his mother chuckles in response.
"anything else happen ?" she asks with a smile. katsuki can already tell shes's onto him. screw this mother's intuition shit.
he opens and closes his mouth a few times, nothing he wants to say seems to come out right.
"ma.." he starts, she hums " when you--how did it feel for you when you fell in love with pops ?"
her eyes widen at his question. she sits and thinks about it for a minute, then a smile grows on her face. " it's not something i can really explain. i just knew it when i saw him, i knew he was meant to be mine."
"even though he's a human..?" he mumbles quietly. his mother doesn't seem fazed, her dazed smile remains.
"yeah." she answers simply.
"it didn't bother you ?"
"nope." she immediatly answers, popping the p.
"it wasn't weird ?"
" it took a little gettin' used to." she hums "we're completely different after all. his family wasn't exactly on board with it. but they didn't say anythin' when i showed 'em my dragon form, i think they were just really amazed." she laughs at her own joke and katsuki fights an eyeroll.
"how'd you do it then ? how'd you..get used to it ?" he asks almost urgently.
her smile hasn't faltered since the beginning of the conversation. it seems to have gotten even wider and even brighter. " i didn't do anything. i loved your father, i still do." she sighs dreamily " when i was around him i didn't worry about anything. i didn't worry about what others thought to begin with, but i didn't worry about that. i wasn't scared of the future or anything."
"there was nothing for me to be worried about when i was around him. it always just felt like things would work out. we made each other happy, and when i was around him it all felt so.." she can't seem to find the right word to use but katsuki finds one for her immediatly.
"right ?" he finishes.
"yeah" she smiles, eyes softening as she looks at her son "yeah, it felt really right."
for the last two weeks, katsuki's been trying to deceive himself. by now he knows it isn't working. at all. he'd been trying to keep his mind quiet. he's been spending time with his friends and it's been nice. but there's clearly something missing. something he knows that his parents or his friends can fill, despite them caring so much for him. and he feels bad because he cares, he really does. but there's something he needs.
you're the one he needs.
"i think.." katsuki jumps a little when his mom speaks up again "i think there's somewhere you need to be, isn't there ?" she asks, though that knowing look she gives him clearly says she already knows the answer.
katsuki bites his lip, looking down towards the ground below. he can't see the bottom.
"i'm scared, ma.." he admits, meekly. mitsuki's heart squeezes at her little boy's heart showing in his eyes, scared of the unknown despite trying his best to convince himself he isn't.
his mother places her hand ontop of his and squeezes " i know, i know you are.." she comforts.
"w-what if it's too late and i messed shit up ?" she shakes her head, shushing him.
"you didn't, i know you didn't." she speaks carefully "if that person is the right one for you, then there's absolutely no way you have." she pulls him into a hug and he hugs her back tightly. no more words are exchanged as katsuki and his mother sit there. she pulls away and presses her forehead to his.
"you get goin' now, okay ?" she feels him nod after a moment and her smiles grows wider. she ruffles her son's hair and he grumbles, pushing at her arm and he fights off a smile.
he's sure, he knows what he needs to do now.
he gets up with vigor and stretches out his limbs and his wings as they flex and expand on his back. before he takes off though, he hears his mom call for him. he turns to look at her proud smiling face.
"you'd better come and visit !" she grinned, sharp fangs on display. katsuki smiles back at that, sharp grin rivaling hers.
" obviously !" he affirms, before taking off.
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you wake up like you'd had the best sleep in your life. probably because you cried yourself to sleep.
you're awake an hour earlier than you usually are and you can't seem to get back to sleep. so bitterly, you decide to just get up and start your day an hour early.
you're definitely not getting ready for work at this hour, so your hello- kitty jammies are staying on. you remember you have a half eaten tub of vanilla-caramel-brownie ice cream in the freezer and it makes you a little happier. you walk over to your fridge with a little skip in your step.
when you sit down on your couch and turn your tv on you can already see the sun rising from your balcony. and it makes you dread having to go to work in an hour and a few minutes, you do your best to ignore it and watch a rerun of some old drama tv show you found.
you take your first bite and hum to yourself happily. the ice cream melts on your tongue and the flavours burst onto your tastes buds. if you could you'd eat ice cream every single day.
but katsuki would scold you for it.
it feels a little harder to swallow down your next bite.
the female and male lead on the show are arguing about something. the man says he only has eyes for the lady. he says that it's always been her, that if he were reborn in another life, in another country, he would still always find his way back to her.
you quietly keep watching, taking smaller and smaller scoops of ice cream. the lady is doubtful, she asks the male how she knows he won't break her heart. he responds that she only needs to trust him, that she needs trust herself.
"what is your heart telling you right now ?" he asks.
"it's telling me.." there's a dramatic pause " that i love you..!" she declares.
the two share a hug and an old ending song plays, you can hear an audience clapping like you sometimes do in old sitcoms. you really wish you could go back to sleep when you check your phone and see that only twenty minutes have passed. you wonder if you can call in sick as you play around with your ice cream, but you draw the line at that. that'd be too childish and you're too grown to be faking sick just because you got your heart broken.
you switch through a couple of channels before you land on an animal documentary. it's about red panda's and red panda's are adorable, so you shuffle on your couch to get comfortable and scoop up another big bite of ice cream.
the moment you bring your spoon to your lips though, you suddenly feel a big gust of wind. accompanied by a loud crash. and a giant hole through your fucking wall.
your spoon stays frozen against your lips, it's cold but you can barely feel it. slowly, you turn to look at something coming out of the cloud of smoke caused by the debris.
or no, it's a someone. you can see them stand up straighter as huge wings stretch on their back along with huge pointy horns and—actually maybe it is a something after all.
except you squint and you realise that it isn't a something.
it's katsuki.
it's katsuki and he's looking at you, bright red eyes focused solely on yours. he's here, he's here with you.
and he's once again blasted a hole through your wall.
you almost want to laugh, but you're afraid if you do you'll start crying. so you simply stare at him. he takes a deep breath and opens his mouth
“hi..” he exhales.
he’s heaving, taking in the force at which your wall was blasted into pieces one could assume it was probably because he was flying really fast, and he was. but this wasn’t really going all out for him. frankly, katsuki bakugou is heaving because he’s so incredibly nervous.
“h-hi..” you utter back, wide eyed. katsuki zones in on something on your face and furrows his brows.
“you’re eating that cold shit that early in the morning ? you’ll get sick.” he chides. this time you do laugh, because he’s so insanely ridiculous, how could you not.
“yeah well, no one was here to stop me so..” he knows the other meaning to your joke very well and his heart hurts at the sadness in your eyes when you fully realize he’s actually here.
“why did you—i thought you had to go home ?” you stutter. he takes a hesitant step towards your couch, towards you. his hand twitches, wanting to reach out to you, to touch you, but he holds back for now.
“yeah i did.” he nods “so here i am.”
your heart feels like it’s beating while being held down under a huge weight. you want to do so many things. you want to cry, ask him so many questions and kiss his mouth off but you can only bring yourself to ask “why ?”
katsuki frowns at the way your bottom lip wobbles and he immediately decides he can’t have that. he walks up to you and grabs your hand to pull you towards him, you stand up with a squeal as he pulls you into him. you’re ice cream long forgotten as neither of you notice the tub hitting the floor.
right now you’re only focused on him and he on you.
“i-i tried to tell myself that i didn’t need you at first, that it was better if i didn’t. we both know we’re—more than completely different,” he chuckles humorlessly. “tried telling myself that i didn’t need you because i didn’t need you my entire life, so why should meeting you, a human, change anything ?”
"but then—i don’t know, i realized that i’d spent so much time with you and your normal human life. with your weird habits and routines and your cheesy animal love stories. and then suddenly i just—" he stops himself mid rambling, he’s still heaving and he can’t seem to calm down. until you reach up and place your hand in his hair.
in seconds it’s feels like he can breathe again. your hands in his hair feel like taking a flight in the dead of night. your entire being is like the way it feels when the wind rushes through his scales.
he needs you, he needs you, he needs you, he needs you and he needs you so bad.
he plops his head against your shoulder and you hear the purring sound from when you’d first pet him in your office building. when you didn’t really know why you did, and that it just felt right to.
“suddenly i realized that i couldn’t be without you. i couldn’t see myself without you and your stupid smug face whenever you’re being a smart ass. without you and your weird taste in movies and your hands in my hair and your smile and—" he cuts himself off again. seemingly realizing he’d said too much. you don’t want to embarrass him too much too soon so you hold back the giggle bubbling up in your throat.
“i thought you liked my taste in movies.” you joke, playing with the hair on his nape. you feel him huff a chuckle against your shoulder.
“never said i didn’t like it. said it’s weird.”
“is there really a difference?” you snort.
“hell yeah there is,” he retorts “ya go from watchin’ that weird demon cat on your phone to watching the conjuring in the same breath.”
“ that just means i'm open to a lot of genres, it’s a good thing !” he snorts then grumbles some kind of agreement under his breath “and don’t you insult hello kitty like that ! she’s done nothing to be classified as a ‘demon cat’.”
“ it’s fuckin’ weird. why doesn’t it have a mouth ? and why are it’s black beady eyes starin’ into my fuckin’ soul ?”
“ quit calling her 'it' ? and she’s adorable !”
“she’s freaky is what she is.” you groan.
"you're insufferable. so incredibly annoying." you grumble in defeat. he lifts his head up to look at you then, his award winning cheese on display with a tiny fang poking out.
"yeah, maybe..but you missed me." he counters. you huff, but you really can't lie "yeah, yeah i did" you say. it comes out sadder than you'd wanted it to, and he seems to notice it. his eyebrows furrow and the remorseful look on his face makes your heart burn. your expression mirrors his as you speak.
"i really did miss you, katsuki. i really did." you whisper sorrowfully. you feel him wipe the tears you didn't even know where about to spill from the corner of your eyes. he grabs your cheeks in both of his large hands and wipes at your eyes, then rubs at your cheeks softly. his eyes burn with unspoken words and feelings and you don't need to hear him say anything to understand. you understand him better than anyone. human or dragon.
and that's all you need.
"i know." he leans in until you're inches away and your eyes flutter closed when he nuzzles his nose against your tenderly. he places his forehead against yours in a way you can only describe as loving. "i know." he whispers again.
"but i won't leave again. i promise." he vows, rubbing his nose against your cheek. the gesture feels very animal like and you giggle a little. he huffs against your cheek in amusement. "you're mine, you've always been. i know that—i'm sure of it now." he corrects "so i'm not goin' anywhere." he's so close. just like that night.
you want to let go, want to give yourself to him and trust him but there's something holding you back. katsuki can tell you're doubtful. he nudges his head against your softly, "talk to me." he urges.
"i just..i'm scared.." you admit "what if things don't work out ? i really, really like you katsuki." your voice trembles and your bottom lip wobbles the slightest bit "i don't want you to go away again.." he shakes his head adamntly, his hair tickles against your forehead. he breathes a sigh and pulls back just enough to look you in the eyes properly.
"i don't know how the future will turn out, or what's gonna happen." he knocks his forehead against yours again "but that doesn't scare me. mostly cus i'm not scared of anything," you roll your eyes but you can't help the chuckle that rips out of you. he smiles, obviously proud of his joke.
"but also because i know you're it for me. no matter what happens, i trust that i'll always come back to you." he seems to realize he's been awfully out of character. a cute blush grows on his face but that doesn't deter him in the slightest, as his eyes stay fixed on you. it makes chills run down your spine.
"you..were made for me. that's all i need." he closes his eyes, embarrasment catching up to him. you smile at how adorable your cranky dragon man could be when he wanted to be.
that's all he needs. you're all he needs. the thought fills your body with so much warmth and love.
you bring your hands up to his cheeks. he opens his eyes. looking down at you with half lidded eyes and so much affection it makes you giddy.
"what is your heart telling you right now ?"
you smile up at him, a watery giggle slips past your lips.
" i love you."
you trust yourself. you trust katsuki. you trust your love for him.
his eyes widen. and suddenly he's leaning down and all he gives you as a warning is a breathy whisper of your name. you don't think twice when you nod your head fervently and then he's closing the distance and kissing you.
in a second it's like you feel whole. it's like he breathes life into you with the kiss he presses onto your lips. and the next one, and the one after that.
he pulls back to catch his breath for no less than three seconds before he's stealing yours away again. but you don't mind in the slightest. you'd give all of yourself up willingly to him. you wish you could stay close with him, holding onto him like this forever.
but then there's a sudden sharp pain in your lip.
"ouch !" you yelp. katsuki immediatly pulls back, eyes racking over your face until he notices red on your lip. you lick at your bottom lip and taste blood. you look up at him, a mix of amusement and suprise on your features. after a second, you let out a chuckle.
"guess you missed me lots, huh ?" you laugh some more when he growls at you. trying his best to seem somewhat intimidating despite the state he's in. he's breathing heavy and he's sweating a little bit, cheeks fully red.
"b-be quiet, human." he leans down and licks the blood off your lip. it flusters you despite him meaning it innocently, dragons are way more direct when it comes to physical affection, it seemed. "i'll roast you alive."
"no you won't, liar." you answer arrogantly. you bring your arms to rest around his neck, your hands play around with the hair on his nape. "you like me too much."
"you're gettin' real cocky, aren't ya ?"
"am i wrong ?" you counter. he narrows his eyes at your challenge but lowers his head in defeat soon after. he shakes his head with a chuckle. "no, guess you're not." he concedes.
"you guess ?" you tease.
"don't push your luck, loser." he nips at your nose, and you giggle. he snarls at you when you tug at his horn, but he can't hide the smile on his face.
"i—uh." he looks away, off to the side towards your tv "love. you. too..or whatever you humans say.." he confesses shyly. too much direct eye contact for one day, it seems. you giggle, then lean in and press a sweet kiss to his lips. it takes him a second before he eases into it. slowly, just as passionately as the first time, but you both know there's no rush to let each other know how you feel. you've got all the time in the world together.
"i'm glad.." you say once you pull away. "so, can i assume that means you're back now?" you joke.
"i told you i'm not goin' nowhere. you're mine." he asserts " i'm back." he states with a fanged grin.
you smile wider at his words. you're smiling so hard your cheeks start to hurt but you really don't mind "welcome back." you answer lovingly.
this feels right. this feels like where you both belong. he's back.
back where he belongs.
you pat his nape "to make yourself back at home, you can make me breakfast !" you chirp. "you owe me at least twenty five homemade dinners too, so you'd better get to work." you laugh out loud when he pokes at your side with one hand, with the one on your face squeezing your cheeks out.
"cheeky brat, already puttin' me to work, hah ?!" he grins "i guess i do owe you dinner though, but definetly not fuckin' twenty five of 'em !" you both laugh at each other some more and you wish all of your days with him here could feel like this. but even if they don't, you're not worried. as long as you're together, you know everything will be okay. you trust that with all your heart.
"katsuki ?" you start after a moment. he hums in response, urging you to continue while he nibbles and presses smooches on your shoulder. you smile, you're so incredibly happy.
"fix up my damn wall, would you ?"
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and here it is yall, the final chapter ! thank you all sooooo much for the overwhelming amount of love for this silly lil series. i couldn't be happier that you guys liked this fic just as much as i did writing it ! and i hope this ending makes yall happy (cuz some of yall were losin it last chap LOLOLOL) take this super fluffy ending as an apology for that then !! much luvv <333
taglist ! : @sikuthealien @rosemarygalaxy @guccirosegold @queenpiranhadon @k0z3me @katsuisbaby @lovra974 @katsus-mistress @briokayama @sixxze @lupikekee @nymphsdomain @berryvioo @roboticsuccubus83 @yao-ai @haruesme @omayrac @raatass @touyasprettydoll
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