#i just have a lot of thoughts abt post-one and | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kriegertops · 19 hours

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This is a very long one:

I was going down a tumblr rabbit hole and came across and old Binoe page that had A LOT of Krashlyn content from 2019-late 2022. And I came away with a few observations:

1) Ali and Ash were deeply in love. The pics, videos, events, comments to each other, just their sheer history together is overwhelming, and they looked happy, affectionate and just in sync thruout. This idea that Ash was in an unhappy marriage is ridiculous. Bc nothing she ever posted indicated anything close to that.

2) The early Sloane months were adorable, and their captured family moments were so cute and loving. They absolutely doted on that child. She was the center of their world, and they documented so much of her cuteness, and it reminded me of how fun Ash was during this time, and I *briefly* remembered why I liked her back then.

3) I hadn’t realized that makeup artist Alex had been with them for so long- I thought she was new once they got to NY. But no- she was there on their wedding day and before. Also, forgot how close both A’s were to all the Gotham girls when they first got to the team, and how tight Midge was with the whole family.

4) I was reminded of how much soccer connected them, and how it dominated their lives.

I eventually had to stop scrolling bc I got sad seeing how they used to be.

So what in the heck happened?

1) I think Ash was not at all prepared for retirement. She didn’t really line anything up that would be sustainable employment, and not having that identity as an athlete was overwhelming. I’m guessing she had some mild/severe bouts of depression, and despite having an adorable family, she realized it wasn’t fulfilling her. That probably led her to be mean and resentful of Ali, which progressed into outright anger, and bc she’s at her core a narcissist, she blamed Ali for her own sorry situation.

2) there’s been so much talk of, how did Ali not know things were so bad? Well, after all those YEARS together, Ali probably assumed they would work it out. Even after ash moved out, she might have still had visions of repairing her family. Trust me, no mom willing concedes 50% of their time with their kids without a hard core fight. I think Ali was willing to do the work- she just couldn’t give it everything bc she was trying to f’ing retire.

3) those women had a TIGHT group of friends. For years, very formative years. Megan loved Ash. They were effusive abt their friendship. Reliving all their posts back and forth again signified how telling it is that almost NONE of their friend group publicly supported ash. National teammates, club teammates, outside soccer friends (makeup Alex), preschool families- they all gave her the heisman. They didn’t engage in SM, didn’t post pics, really just dumped her like a bad habit. Divorces happen in friend groups- it can be kinda awkward, but they’re grown adults who can make their own choices. And they all very clearly chose a side. And you wouldn’t do that as a friend unless what you saw was behavior so egregious and abhorrent that you couldn’t in good faith support it. And that’s exactly what happened. Ash recently posted something abt friends who chose her over optics, clearly indicating anger at those old friends. Her and Pinoe were at the same event this week, yet no public pics or any indication they interacted. I’m assuming they did, but in the past we’d see evidence of it. She goes on and on abt her new friend group, but it has to hurt a lot that she lost her old tribe. And people that know both her and Sophia- like a Glennon or Foudy, have given the couple no play at all.

4) While I have absolutely ZERO empathy for Ash, I do think she’s gotten herself into a situation that has lots of complications and might not end the way she expects. How do two self involved love bombers stay together once the newness wears off and they are in the mundane realities of everyday life? Ash has 17+ years left of raising kids. And once the kids are doing events and activities, she won’t be able to bail for a week at a time. And eventually she’s going to need to find work. Courts don’t like parents who don’t pull their weight. I think they got caught up in their infatuation, are bonded over their us vs them mentality right now, and once their feelings come back down to earth, it will be a different reality for them. I don’t really care- I don’t wish them any luck. I just think they have an uphill battle.

And my last musing after all this was about how much deep respect and awe I have for Ali. She was served a complete shit burger in the middle of her retirement season. When she should have been riding high, enjoying her last professional soccer games as a player, she was thrown into the worst chaos a person can be in. I will detest Ashlyn forever for putting her in this situation, and not having the maturity to wait it out with Sophia, and let her former wife have her moment. I think back to that Pinoe game where she and Sophia paraded around and my blood completely boils for Ali. I don’t know what happened between them, but the intentional cruelty and vindictiveness Ash showed is so disgusting, it defies logic. I am so thrilled that Ali has moved on, is thriving and has shed this dead weight from her being. I can’t imagine what she’s gone thru, but to see her unbothered and smiling now is just wonderful. I wish nothing but happy things for her!

Okay, I think that’s it! Thanks for reading my dissertation 🤣

Thank you for this anon!!! I appreciate the time you took to write this cause damn this is long😂🔥 I agree though with your thoughts on the situation and honestly the more we find out the more obvious it becomes that Ashlyn is nothing but a narcissistic cheater and Ali’s a warrior and queen who deserves happiness!

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butchfalin · 5 months

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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

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upsidedowngrass · 1 year

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dunno why but always uneasy when i see "post-ONE liam becomes the new airy and hosts season 3" aus tbh? LIKE. ofc i dont think all of them are like that cut n dry but it just doesnt feel right for his character yknow? yeah ppl act ooc when faced w horrible situations but it feels like it contradicts how liams arc over the series implies he responds to things.

airy AND liam are both normal people in horrible situations ofc! and liam and airy are very much meant as parallels. but even if there was an equivalent to airy creating ONE for liam, i dont think it would be creating a new season of the very thing that traumatized him

also, season one happened over a decade ago, and airy ALSO only died a bit over a decade ago. he also died and ended up COMPLETELY alone. this implies he pretty quickly teleported ppl to the plane and subsequently threw a rock at them (not that simple yeah but u get the idea). he was lonely and restless and missed PEOPLE that i think he quickly i dont think airys experience of dying then being isolated evokes the same responses as liam being taken to the plane and Experiencing The Horrors does if that makes any sense?

a lot of liams motivations very specifically lie in saving ppl from the fucked up situation he was subjected to, and that prompts the majority of his actions! airys motivations are that of someone so isolated after dying that he wanted to bring ppl TO him! of anything, while their general concepts parallel each other, their responses to their experiences act more like foils, similar to how liam and amelia have concepts that act the same as each other and responses that mirror the other!

they both represent how these types of situations cause ppl to act in ways they never would before. but i think EVERY character represents this, but i think they are all meant to show these responses and different ways, and i think thats a key to understanding the intricacies of the characters better! (ex: amelia gives up on her old life and pours herself into helping the others, bryce pushes it all aside and views it as a worst case scenario type thing, etc)

liams response initially (as implied by the "i know it eas hard to let go" line) was to hold onto any hope he could (which seems to have been . very stressful) but then he stopped seeing himself as part of the equation. his main priority was to save anyone while he could bc as far as he was concerned, it was already over for him

airys response , while we dont see where he started outside of his present dialogue, seems to have been quickly letting go of that home of returning home. but he didnt just let go, he let go fast, by the looks of it. he didnt leave the world hed found specifically bc he thought it was the best he was gonna get. so he starts making everything liveable. but in doing so, he kinda gave himself a new motivation, that being ONE

liam held on as hard as he could, but resigned himself to letting go and saving the others from being stuck on the plane

the moment he felt like hed lost everything, he stopped caring about himself

airy let go quickly, but in doing so found something to take its place, which was bringing people to him and making his world more fun

the moment he realized hed gained something, he poured 10 years into perfecting it

#i also think it contradicts the narrative themes of one #BUT also a lot of these r aus so i get that thats not rly the focus of them!#also not maintagging this bc i dont want anyone to think im like #mocking their aus or saying their aus suck #bc like i said a lot are more complex than just #but i just have a loooot of thoughts on character personalities in one and how they relate to the other characters!#tho i will admit some versions of these aus make me a little. uncomfortable when they write liam as like #like That #if that makes sense #like the very. 'oh hes unhinged now' ones #which isnt TOO often but enough to make me uncomfortable yknow?#that might just be me though!#hfjone spoilers #ask to tag :)#also sorry if this is incoherent i just have many thoughts about ONE #this isnt even the only thing i could write on this type of subject wrt ONE #SHIT. after posting this it put one of the tags at the top. forgot quotes do that. bit also im on mobile so retyping the. is. NOT an option #so that series of tags may not make sense i am so sorry #BUT did also wanna reiterate that !! aus r ok and i dont want anyone to feel like im sayin their aus bad #i just have a lot of thoughts abt post-one and #esp since many ppl actually have this not just as an au but an interpretation of what happens after one 18 #and i wanted to throw my own thoughts into the ring!

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taxinealkaloids · 4 months

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behold hitherto unposted htn doodles! harrow+her terrible mentor, harrow+her terrible roommate

#tlt #my art #these were unfinished which i thought was a shame so i sort slapped some colors nd background stuff on them and now here they are.#top one soooo old but i still liked it and didnt want to condemn it to a fate of sitting in my wip folder forever and ever #bottom ones are more recent; they were scattered throughout the margins of a bunch of different wips and i grouped them together #in this one canvas so i could post them cause i like em. im charmed by soup bowl harrow w/ her normal pajamas. she would probably #not wear that.#ive been thinking abt harrianthe a lot lately i want to post about them more but i can't finish anything lately #not cause im artblocked or anything i'm fine in that respect i just have no free time 💀

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muchmossymess · 5 months

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So we know how the previous winners had a theme of not playing the game "correctly" and winning, right?

Joel and bdubs purposefully guessing pearls tasks wrong so she's safe around them and etho making half the server fail their joint task because he won't let anyone hurt his allies

#just. some food for thought #(i am one hundred and ten percent manifesting a boat boy win. esp joel AVENGE YOUR FRIENDS GO WILD)#(if you didnt know: grian teaming with a red. scott not killing as the boogey. pearl not teaming with her soulmate and martyn betrayal)#(i actually have a lot of thoughts abt his win but thats for another post)#joel smallishbeans #smallishbeans #etho #ethoslab #bdubs #bdouble0 #bdoubleo100 #secret life #life series #life series smp #secret life smp #trafficblr #theory

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mumuqings · 4 months

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tgcf book spoilers, but one mu qing and xie lian snippet that I think about a lot is this one, at the start of xie lian’s second banishment when he’s surprised to hear mu qing being described as generous and kind:

as opposed to this memory from before his first ascension when mu qing started giving out cherries to the kids in the city:

I think it just really goes to show 1) how deeply mq’s actions truly affected xl and what he thought of him, but also 2) just how different mq and xl are fundamentally in the way that they think and approach things.

I don’t have a lot of commentary on xl that hasn’t already been said, but bc we get the story from xl’s pov, we see a lot of mq’s actions being framed as selfish or suspicious (which is fair, bc again, we know how much his actions hurt xl), but we also see a lot of misconstrued kindness, like in book 8 where it’s revealed that he knocked out fx in order to save him. it’s also pretty obvious how much mq still cares abt xl, with how quickly he volunteers as fu yao and the lengths he goes to protect him when he deems hc a threat, so I also think it’s very likely that mq leaving the trio first was exactly what he said it was — that he thought becoming a junior official, ascending quickly, would be the best way to take care of not just his mother, but also xl, fx, the king and queen, and himself, and so in a way, him leaving was him acting on his kindness. but ofc it doesn’t work out, and he spends the next 800 years fighting w/ fx about it, defending himself, his decisions, and his kindness, and nitpicking the accuracies of his statues while he himself remains completely misunderstood by the two people he probably cares abt the most.

and idk, I guess I just think that’s probably a really lonely way to spend 800 years.

#idk where I was going w this actually #but misunderstood mq who cares so much abt how he’s perceived is smth that I think abt a lot #really resonates w my eldest daughter scapegoat of the family trauma tbh #also to be clear I don’t think xl was in the wrong for chasing him away either #I think they were both just twenty year olds doing their best in a situation that twenty year olds shouldn’t have to face #that said I do think it’s hilarious and incredible that fq spent 800 years beating each other up instead of having one (1) conversation #anyway! I love all three of them! I’m glad they get a happy post canon!#oh also I think mq deserved more than just a ‘just so u know dianxia never thought that poorly of u! just be normal!’#i think he deserves an apology actually #tgcf #tgcf spoilers #mu qing #xie lian #feng xin #xianle trio #yams thoughts

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beanghostprincess · 19 days

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Sanji and Usopp during The Sabaody Incident™ won't leave my mind.

Usopp standing in front of Sanji protectively because he is wounded and he can't fight, so Usopp will do it for him ("I'll do what you can't do").

There is just something about Sanji's expression when he realizes he might actually lose Usopp. This is my interpretation, at least. He is literally frightened.

Usopp helping Sanji stand up to run away. This is crucial for something I want to point out later: Sanji needs help to stand up. (Also, Brook disappears trying to protect them both and saying he will do anything to save them even if it costs him his life. I am feeling sick).

Sanji being self-sacrificing and blaming himself for not being able to protect them/act sooner is not new. But he does manage to gain the strength to fight when Usopp is the only one left with him and the possibility of losing him is even more real now.

The thing that I love the most about this is not Sanji sacrificing himself for Usopp, because he does that. He is like that. But Usopp not running away or moving in the slightest because he refuses to leave Sanji on his own.

Something I'd like to point out too is that Sanji actually touches Kuma before Usopp disappears. He tries to fight and protect him and Kuma could've easily sent Sanji to Momoiro Island right away, and yet Sanji was just sent flying far from the scene and forced to see Usopp disappear in front of him.

And I am not saying that "not being able to protect both Brook and Usopp (especially Usopp) is needed for Sanji to realize he has to become stronger and find more reasons to go back with the crew" but not being able to protect both Brook and Usopp (especially Usopp) is needed for Sanji to realize he has to become stronger and find more reasons to go back with the crew.

Not to mention that we can't deny (right after Water 7/Enies Lobby) that Usopp is one of Sanji's strongest bonds within the crew. This specific scene focusing on them both is more than enough to prove it.

Sanji seeing Usopp disappear in front of his eyes without being able to do anything to save him.

Remember what I said about Sanji needing help to stand up seconds ago? Well. This is him the moment Usopp disappears. What adrenaline and the power of love do to a mf.

They are so "I can lose everything, but not you. Oh God, not you" shaped.

#sorry for bringing up sabaody i am sure nobody wants to think about it #but they mean the world to me and there is SO MUCH to unpack #we don't talk enough about this i think ?????#sanji spending two whole years having nightmares about not being able to save usopp. about seeing usopp disappearing in front of him #he still has them btw #sanji having to sleep with usopp post-ts because he is afraid of waking up and seeing he is gone #also i am having thoughts about brook protecting them and #and brook saying he will do anything to save them #because sanji has only heard that from zeff so......... so just thinking. i have thoughts. i told you brook is one of sanji's father figure #back to sanuso- thinking about how this whole scene despite having brook too is mainly focused on both sanji and usopp #thinking abt how the others disappear mostly focusing only on luffy's reactions but this emphasizes a lot sanji's attempts to save usopp #why would you give them a whole scene i am throwing up #sorry still thinking abt sanji apologizing to usopp for not being able to protect him or #or having nightmares he definitely has nightmares about it #and usopp just. staying with him and making him see that he is alright now. and letting him cry.#early post-ts kills me #still angry we don't have almost post-ts sanuso #i might start crying thinking abt them so it'll be better if just shut up and post this #one piece #black leg sanji #usopp #sanuso #sabaody

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ink-the-artist · 1 month

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I love your artwork so much! Your colors are so vibrant and none of the white speckles in the paper ever shows, its so impressive and I really dig it! I was wondering if you use any sort of blending medium? Like baby oil or anything? Either way, I really enjoy looking at your artwork and I'm always excited to see whatever you'll make next

I use a colorless blender (prismacolor, which is wax-based so baby oil probably wouldnt work) but my scanner is also rly bad about picking up white specks in a way photographing the art with my phone isnt, so I usually have to do some digital editing to get rid of them as well.

I do this by duplicating the layer, setting the one on top to "darken," and using the mixer brush to blend out the white spots + just use the eyedropper tool to select the color of that area (needs to be a slightly lighter shade of it) and color over the white spots with the brush tool

i edited a small bit of the original scan to show what i mean

original:

with the edited layer:

heres how it looks set to normal instead of darken, I used both the mixing brush and regular brush just to demo it

#explanation is under the cut. post got a bit too long #u prob have to click the image for full resolution to rly see what i mean about the white specks showing up #i think its bc the scanner is meant to scan documents. so it picks up the white specks of paper very brightly #how much editing is done varies from piece to piece #ive thought abt listing 'digital art' as one of the mediums in tags for the more heavily edited art #where it looks significantly different than the physical drawing in front of me #but i feel like that might be confusing #art where i set out to do some mix of traditional and digital is tagged this way but im not rly sure where to draw the line tbh #the hunger wasnt edited in a way where it looks significantly different from the original (just a bit darker)#the scan is just dull and light bc my scanner is like that lol #so with editing that one i was mostly just trying to make it look like the physical drawing in front of me #u can tell by the 'layer 44' in the screenshot these take a lot of editing lmao #art help

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skitskatdacat63 · 7 months

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Fernando Chair Lore: 2013 edition(no lore, just pics haha):

#100% normal not derangement post what are you talking about!!!#you guys: 'wow she really likes this chair huh....'#itll all come full circle i swear to you #but also just like this is a comp post i really feel passionate abt CAUSE HE LOOKS SO GOOD OKAY #like....theres 30 pics...i cant even BEGIN to comment #so just let me know your fav yknowwwwwwww #or just join me in appreciating these fine photos #i want to be the ferrari photographer who was just lurking in the garage waiting for nando to sit down #anyways 5th one down on the leftmost side...i hope you know what my thoughts about that one are....#these pics have incredible range: brooding...puppy cute...super villian sexy mastermind...#bro is COZYYYY #also these are just from getty. im sure theres more but i wasnt ready to get into alladat. it was a lot already #fernando alonso #f1 #formula one #formula 1 #we do a little bit of f1 #fa14

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cathalbravecog · 1 month

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letting the days go by

(got a feeling someone defo already drew this so i chose a different pose ref to the mv lol.)

#lowkey wanna try and draw this Beast daily before april but that might kill me so we will see #i thought of making them all music video related but then i learn i dont #watch music videos a lot i dont care abt em typically. and im finding it hard to insert hr into g/orillaz (to avoid maintagging) bc that wa #one of my og fixations el oh el #doesnt fit hr a 100% but fun song to reference bc I Just Like It and also Ha Ha I Am An E/NA Fan #giggle #ttcc #toontown corporate clash #high roller #guz art #also i do have a fr feeling someone drew this before but idk if im like #making up a post or if someone really did it i have like #the worst memory ever and had cases i accidentally made up posts in my mind that dont exist that end up confusing me SO

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khattikeri · 3 days

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maybe a controversial opinion but while i really love jiang cheng as a character he is deeply self-centered as a person. and seeing people fight tooth and nail claiming he isn't, or is just misunderstood, or that he has genuine valid reasons to be selfish when plenty of other characters make the difficult choice to forego status and opportunities for what they believe is genuinely right to do (read: wei wuxian, wen ning, wen qing, lan wangji, jiang yanli, mianmian, etc.)

it's just odd to me. especially if they're talking about the novels.

mxtx didn't give jiang cheng the name "sandu shengshou" as a quirky coincidence. there's a REASON she named him & his sword after the 3 poisons of Buddhism (specifically ignorance, greed, and hatred). it's crucial to the story that jiang cheng is NOT selfless and that wei wuxian IS.

it's important to accept that wei wuxian is, by their society's standards, not morally gray; he represents several Buddhist ideals in direct contrast of jiang cheng and multiple people attest to wei wuxian's strong moral character, which is a lot of why jiang cheng even feels bitter about him to begin with.

it's crucial, because by the end of the novel jiang cheng realizes the extent of this and begins to let go!

the twin prides thing wasn't jiang cheng wanting them to 100% mirror the twin jades. he does care about wei wuxian, but he wanted wei wuxian to stay his right hand man, in part the way wei changze was for jiang fengmian.

and if there's one thing you can notice about wei changze in the novels, it's that literally nobody talks about him. he is only ever mentioned when his cool mysterious mountain sect wife cangse-sanren is mentioned, or (even more rarely) when they discuss him as a servant to jiang fengmian. regardless of jiang fengmian's own feelings, wei changze was considered lesser to him and didn't seem to outdo him, since nobody's out there years later still waxing poetry about wei changze's skills.

it may not be the only thing jiang cheng wants out of a twin pride dynamic, but it is a big part of it. regardless of his parents' intentions in taking wei wuxian in and treating him certain ways, this twin pride right-hand man thing is what jiang cheng has felt owed since childhood. he gave up his dogs for wei wuxian, people gossip about his sect heir position with wei wuxian there... jiang cheng wants the reciprocation of what he views as personal sacrifices.

he is ignorant to the depth of what wei wuxian must've suffered for over 6 years as a malnourished orphan child on the streets. he hates how wei wuxian's intelligence, witty charm, and cultivation abilities are naturally stronger than his own. he does care about wei wuxian a lot and want them to be together as sort of-brothers, sort of-friends, sort of-young master and sect servant...

...but if it's between that unclear (yet still caring) relationship and being able to save himself just a little bit more, jiang cheng nearly always manages to clam up in the face of danger and choose the latter, which ultimately benefits himself most. maybe it's a stretch to call that sort of thing greed, but it certainly isn't selfless.

there are of course plenty of justifications for this. it's his duty as sect heir. his home and sect was severely damaged by the wen attack and subsequent war; he had to protect himself, etc.

but doesn't that prove the point?

wei wuxian may be charming, but in terms of pure social standing, he is lower and far more susceptible to being punished or placed in harm's way by people who have more power and money. to protect wei wuxian, yunmeng jiang's long-term head disciple and semi-family member, even in the face of backlash and public scrutiny would've been the selfless thing to do. this is what wei wuxian does for the wen remnants in the burial mounds.

jiang cheng does not choose this. it's not even an unreasonable choice for him to make! nobody else in the great clans is doing such a thing, stepping out of line to take on a burden that could weaken them in the long-run. wei wuxian himself doesn't hate jiang cheng for it; he lets go of these things and focuses on what good he can do in the present.

jiang cheng thinks further into the future - what would happen to him if he continued vouching for wei wuxian and taking his side? what about jiang cheng's face, his sect's face? would wei wuxian even care to reciprocate somehow? everyone expects him to cut off wei wuxian for being dangerous, for threatening his position, for...

do you see what i mean? to call jiang cheng selfless for falling in line with exactly what people expected him to do after the war is not only wrong, it's foolish.

"but they faked their falling-out!" okay. why fake it to begin with, except to protect jiang cheng and the jiang sect's own face? is that selfless? who does it ultimately serve to protect? wei wuxian canonically internalizes the idea that he stains all that he touches, including lan wangji, and agrees to the fake fight because he doesn't want to cause the jiang sect harm. regardless, it eventually slides into a true falling-out, and in the end jiang cheng is more or less unscathed reputation-wise while wei wuxian falls.

that isn't selfless. it's many things! it's respecting his clan and his ancestors, it's making a good plan for the future of his sect and cultivation... but it isn't a truly selfless in the interest of what's right rather than in the interest of duty and what's good for him and his family lineage.

that brings me to my next point: even though wei wuxian hid the truth of the golden core transfer, jiang cheng spent nearly 20 years believing that the golden core "renewal" he was given was a birthright gift of wei wuxian's from baoshan-sanren, an immortal sect teacher of wei wuxian's mother's and a martial elder to wei wuxian.

of course we all know that's a big fat lie, but jiang cheng believed that wei wuxian gave up a critical emergency use gift to him for decades! he was lied to, yes, but jiang cheng immediately agreed without even needing to be convinced. the light in his dead eyes came back with hope the moment wei wuxian even said baoshan-sanren's name. he accepted wei wuxian's offer to give that up to him and take it via identity theft without missing a beat.

with how mysterious and revered baoshan-sanren is, that's obviously not a light sacrifice to just give up to anyone, no matter how close they might be to you. pretending to be wei wuxian to take the gift could even be considered dangerous. what if she found out and got offended? could wei wuxian be hurt by that?

jiang cheng doesn't even hesitate. wei wuxian is the one who mentions that if jiang cheng doesn't pretend to be him, the immortal master could get angry and they'd both be goners. and funnily enough, the day they do go to "the mountain", jiang cheng is the one worried and suspiciously wondering if wei wuxian was lying to him or had misremembered.

of course they've both been traumatized like hell prior to this point. but still: it speaks to how broken he was at the moment as well as to his character overall.

i digress: jiang cheng "gets his golden core back" via what he believed was a gift that should've been wei wuxian's to use in serious emergencies. rather than use it for himself, wei wuxian risked his own safety and gave it to jiang cheng... and jiang cheng still ends up embittered and angry, believing that wei wuxian is arrogant and selfish.

if he truly views them as 100% brothers and equals with no caveats, why would he think that way? it's not like he needs to grovel before wei wuxian for doing that, or to reciprocate... but this is what i mean when i say jiang cheng feels he is owed things by wei wuxian. wei wuxian's actions hold a very different weight in jiang cheng's mind, and jiang cheng himself doesn't ever act the same way, except once.

is it wrong for him to feel like he is owed something? it depends. many asian cultures, including my own, feel that a person owes their family in ways that may not make sense to westerners. for example, it's considered normal for a child to owe their parents for giving birth to them, or to other caretakers for feeding, clothing, sheltering, educating them, etc.

however, something like verbally saying "thank you" or "i'm sorry" to family is considered crazy- why would you owe that? you're supposed to inconvenience your family; saying thank you or sorry is the sort of thing you say to a stranger or acquaintance. i get half-seriously lectured by my elders on this a lot even now, even though they know such phrases are just considered good manners in the US.

this muddies up the idea of wei wuxian being jiang cheng's family vs his family's charge or servant even more. jiang cheng wants wei wuxian to be close... but ultimately doesn't really choose to use what power he DOES have to protect wei wuxian. he considers himself still owed something that in his mind wei wuxian flagrantly never repays.

this isn't even getting into how despite spending a majority of his time with the yiling patriarch he never once noticed that wei wuxian stopped using any spiritual power-based cultivation. even lan wangji, who met them far more rarely, realized that something was wrong and that wei wuxian had taken some sort of spiritual damage, hence the "come with me to gusu".

of course manpain is fun and i'm not immune to the juicy idea of them reconciling and talking things out... but jiang cheng is deeply mired in his own desire to be "above" wei wuxian in multiple ways, and doesn't realize the extent of wei wuxian's actions, the intentions behind them, and the consequences wei wuxian knowingly faced for them.

to not recognize this about jiang cheng, especially in the novels, is really revisionist if you ask me. i reiterate that i really do like him a lot. he's flawed, angry, traumatized and has poor coping mechanisms, an overall fascinating character... but he is not selfless nor ideal, and i seriously draw the line at people saying he is.

wen ning shoves this all into his face at lotus pier to disastrous results. it is the reason why jiang cheng's a total mess at guanyin temple, and the reason jiang cheng ultimately doesn't tell wei wuxian about the fact that he ran towards the wens on purpose.

for that one last act of his to have really been selfless, he needs to not seek anything in return. he did it purely because it was right to do to protect someone else. if that means wei wuxian never finds out about it, so be it.

that moment that ended up causing jiang cheng irreversible harm is not a debt that wei wuxian owes him. it hurts, but no matter how bitter it is, that realization is so important to him changing in the future.

#keri chats #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #jiang cheng #long post #this is NOT anti/crit for him btw i like him a lot i just feel like nobody interprets him the way i perceive him #which even then my interpretation is p nebulous... worth saying i also heavily disagree w ppl who think of him as an evil shithead #he's upper class & steeped in jianghu politics/self preservation. flawed as hell human being but they're all war criminals lbr it's #Magical Genocide and War Crimes: The Novel #anyway this post is messy as fuck but if u read all of it: thank u. if u agree with me: ilu. i wish more ppl understood revenge ethics #as they stand in asian cultures and history vs in western (almost always culturally christian) cultures #it's unclear how far in the future the extras are but at one pt he's ''the same as ever'' which at best indicates slow emotional growth #and like. ykw? i don't think he'll be repressed bitter angry thinking abt his losses n pain forever. i think he can grow i believe in him #i have so many thoughts on this i could've made this post go on forever augh

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milo-igidk · 11 months

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yo keefe is FUCKED UP like i thought i was projecting most stuff but NO, rereading the books oh my god he needs therapy wtf

like you ever just remember that hes been implied suicidal since book 4

#i projected a lot and i mean A LOT of my problems on him and i thought I was the one who made him this mentally ill but NAH #plus i have projected so much of my autism/adhd stuff in him and maybe its just me looking at in that light but??#ill make a post abt the characters i think are autistic and why sometime #kotlc #keefe sencen #kotlc keefe #sokeefe #kotlc keefe sencen #keefe #kotlc fandom #kotlc stellarlune #neverseen

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vasito-de-leche · 4 months

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hello!! your writing is so good i am perceiving it /pos. i'm not sure if you do familial/platonic requests so ignore this if you don't but may i request click with a reader who he sees as an older sibling? it can be headcanons or like general thoughts i don't rlly care. thank you!! <3

;R1999 CLICK - Familial Headcanons

Compilation of headcanons and analysis about Click and an older sibling figure.

ty for the ask, nonnie <3 and yes, I do write for familial/platonic stuff too, not just romance! check the rules if you have any questions!

As far as I know, there's no information about Click's family nor their dynamics, and he doesn't seem to fit any of the stereotypical youngest/middle/eldest child labels. So, going by personality alone, I'd say that for Click to consider someone as his very own older sibling figure, they'd have to be somewhat similar to him!

Not necessarily a carbon copy of him, mind you - they don't have to share his passion for photography nor agree with him 24/7! Just someone who he can relate to and who brings him a sense of security. Perhaps someone like Zima! Insightful, with a strong core and sense of self, aiming to broaden his horizons.

Someone who has also seen the darker aspects of life, lived through tragedies and come out stronger - Click is proud of his job, but he knows that talking about heavy subjects isn't everyone's cup of tea. So he'd like to know that his older sibling figure can understand or is trying to understand where he comes from, that he doesn't mean to bring the mood down whenever he happens to bring up the subject of war. It's part of his life and his experiences, and pretending that it didn't happen would be a disservice to all the things he's witnessed.

Alternatively, Click would gravitate towards anyone who shows extreme passion for their craft, regardless of what it might be - creative people who are dedicated and who experience the world through different artistic mediums are a big inspiration for him. Someone who drags him into all sorts of situations, allowing Click to capture many different points of view that he would've otherwise missed. Someone like Regulus or Diggers!

Click tends to wander and disappear a lot. It's always up to you to find him.

Younger siblings tend to either follow after their older siblings all the time like puppies, or disappear off the face of the Earth and mind their business (I'm the youngest of 6 siblings, I can vouch for this). Click fits the latter!

It's common for him to just wander around and disappear for days on end to focus on taking the best pictures across the Wilderness, with nothing but his camera and his thoughts. Somehow, he always seems to know whenever you call out to him - he'll manifest beside you right away, hoping he's not gotten into trouble. It's a weird feeling, knowing people expect him to keep in touch and come back safe and sound, that no matter where he goes, he'll still hear your voice calling out to him because he's going to miss dinner (not that he even needs to eat). But it's a very nice, warm feeling, so he doesn't mind.

I like to think Click - and pretty much any ghost within the universe of R1999 - can just become invisible to the human eye at will, with arcanists (especially those of Spirit and Intelligence afflatus) being able to sense their presence. During particularly bad days, where PTSD might be giving Click a hard time, he'll just fade away so that no one can see him. And then, he'll pick a spot to sit and wait for it to blow over.

Sometimes, you find him anyway, no matter how much he tries to hide. Sometimes, he lets you know where he is. Either way, he lets you know that he'd like for you to stay and keep him company - I imagine there's a system you two come up with, should he feel too overwhelmed to talk. Knock once for yes, two for no. Tug on your shirt if he wants to lead you somewhere quieter, pat your hand to sit down with him, etc etc.

Everyone begins to see you as Click's guardian.

On a less sad note, whenever someone needs Click for anything, they always go to you first and foremost! Either because you're the only one who can figure out where he may be, or because they want to run their plans through you first.

Vertin specifically makes sure to know if you'd like to accompany him during missions that require his presence, or if you'd like to know the details of his next solo mission. It's something she does out of politeness and as a a formality - and because Click just seems to perk up just a tiny bit if she tells him that you expect him to do a proper job. Whenever Lilya is planning to give Click a ride to take better pictures, she always jokes around, saying that she'll bring your precious brother back in one piece. Pavia always jokingly threatens Click to snitch on him and tell his "big scary sibling" that he's been taking pictures of people when they sleep.

From an outsider's point of view - those who do not belong to this group - it feels like everyone is infantilizing Click. He's 19 and a war photographer! But one has to remember that everyone in this suitcase has lost family and friends to the "Storm".

Aside from being displaced and forced into unfamiliar waters, everyone is dealing with so many things on their own, like losing their lives and all the people they once knew and cared for. So knowing that Click was able to form such a strong bond with you, to trust and see you as family, despite everything? It really brings them hope for a brighter future - Vertin's goal to create a place for those who have nowhere else to go starts to make sense for them. And hey, most of them are willing to stop with their little jokes and such should they bother you or Click!

This specific point comes from me seeing Vertin's group as one huge found family - there's no way everyone will get along, but at the end of the day, everyone trusts and relies and takes care of each other. The dynamics within this found family are much too complex for me to get into right now and for people outside of it to even understand, just know that it's a thing!

Click picks up on your mannerisms and speech pattern unconsciously.

Click isn't very talkative outside of the usual photography or artistic talk, he's more of a listener. And while he does become a little more talkative around you, opening up and whatnot, you tend to do most of the talking. And that's how he ends up picking up your mannerisms!

It's especially funny for everyone if you happen to have a very different and contrasting way of speech- the way Click just casually drops an F bomb in that soft-spoken voice whenever he fails to get the perfect shot will NEVER stop funny.

I like to think that, because of how observant he is, he also ends up picking up on your unique gestures. It's all an unconscious thing he does - if someone points it out Click won't even know what they're talking about, entirely oblivious to the fact that he now emotes and makes the same facial expressions as you do, the same gestures (at least when his hands are free, instead of clinging to that camera of his) and using the same phrases and whatnot.

#reverse 1999 #reverse: 1999 #reverse 1999 headcanons #reverse 1999 x reader #reverse 1999 click #im a relationship anarchist so you have to understand. talking abt found families makes me go DERANGED #i kept it to just general familial stuff tho #see if it were up to me. click would call you the english equivalent of kuya or ate but. no one does that in english apparently #calling your siblings sis or bro??? is apparently weird??? but its so natural to me. like yeah thats my kuya!!#sorry i shortwired thinking about pinoy pavia again #i also have a lot of thoughts about click and war PTSD and whatnot but thats for a different post

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