#i know that if a person i talk to is worth being a friend with‚ they'll forgive these little mistakes i'll make‚ but the idea of being

[writingroom21]

The Nanny

Pairing: rafe x nanny reader

Summary: Being Wheezie's nanny was great. The only downside is dealing with the oldest Cameron, Rafe. What happens when his fascination with the nanny becomes a reality?

Warnings: 18+, oral (m receiving), p in v, unprotected sex (Practice safe sex), cream pie, slapping, chocking, squirting, use of daddy

Wc: 5.3K

Chapter 3: Guess we're both broken

Waking up the next morning, you tossed over to the otherside, noticing the sheets were cold. Peaking through sleep coated eyes you realize that Rafe is gone. Sitting Up you look around the room, his shirt and shorts gone as well. Not surprised that he was gone, a sinking feeling is in your chest, he used you. Once again you are left knowing that you shouldn’t have thought anything else. Should have known him being on his best behavior recently was just another ploy to sleep with you, knowing that he won. 

The rest of the day was spent moping around Tannyhill, grateful that you didn’t need to see him. Sarah being the only person you see when she stops by to get some of her things before running off again to stir up trouble. The day was so uneventful that you even decided to go to your parents cookout. Which turned out as awful as you expected it to go.

Reaching your childhood home you can see your neighbors scattered around the lawn. You notice your dad on the grill talking to one of the other dad, most likely talking about what rub or glaze he used this time. Walking around you greeted a few people who stopped you to ask how work is going. “That Cameron boy is causing you any trouble is he?” If only you knew, you thought. “No he’s not. They are all really respectful to me.” In hindsight it wasn’t a lie, they have been really nice making you feel welcomed. If the past two nights hadn’t happened you wouldn’t be so apprehensive to say it, but they did happen.

Everything seemed to be going well until you reached your mom. She was talking to some of her friends when she saw you walking their way. “Well if it isn’t my precious little angel. Hardly recognize you since we never see you.” She chuckles, trying to mask the insult with laughter. Taking a deep breath you give her a hug. “I know, I’m sorry. Been trying to visit but it’s been hectic.” Saying hi to the rest of the group was met with few words, some of them not replying at all. “How much work can it really be? The young one is practically an adult herself.” Your mom has a way of making everything you do seem insignificant or an inconvenience to her, your job being one of them. 

“You’d be surprised. Wheeze is a saint but she does give me a run for my money. I should go say hi to dad before he feels left out.” With that you walked off to greet your dad. The rest of the night was a never ending cycle of your parents making small jabs at you. Making you and the rest of the party uncomfortable every time they spoke. The cherry on the cake was when they pulled off to the side just as you were about to leave. “Sweetie, we need to ask you something and before you start getting mad you need to agree to hear us out.” Your dad says sitting on the couch looking at you, your mom next to him nodding along to his words. “Okay.”

“So you see we really need to fix up the house. You know how bad the AC is, you would have better luck keeping the fridge door open then that thing working.” Oh god you can already see where this is going, eyes rolling waiting for them to ask you for money. “Don’t roll your eyes at us, we are your parents.” Your mother scolded. “Anyway.” your dad continues. “We don’t have the money to get it fixed. The mortgage is barely even being covered as it is, we just need you to spot us some money. Just enough to get us going.” Taking a deep breath and cooling your nerves. “How much?” you ask.

“4,000.” Your eyes widen at the price, that's a whole month's worth of pay, let alone you don’t have that on you right now due to helping them out. “4,000? You need me to give you 4,000 dollars? By when?” The questions shootout at them. “Yes 4,000 and we need it now preferably.” So that’s why they invited you today, not because they miss you like they claim but because they need money. “I don’t have that kind of money on me or in my account.” “What do you mean you don’t have that money? What’s the point of working for some kooks if they don’t pay you well.” Your dad scoffs turning and looking at your mom. “What did I tell you? I told you she wouldn’t help us.”

This really can’t be happening right now. You have been working since you were 14 to contribute to the bills, every paycheck going straight into their hands. “I have been helping you. I’ve been helping you for the past six years with every bill in this house.” “We never asked you to do that.” Your mother rebuttals, taking another sip from the glass of wine in her hand. “Yes you have!.” you exclaim. “You are literally asking me for 4,000 dollars as we speak. Every time you ask me for money I hand it over without making a fuss, but this I can’t do. I have my own expenses, you know.”

“What expenses? All of a sudden you live in a fancy mansion and you’re too good to help out your parents.” Your dad’s words hurt you. You have tried to be their perfect daughter your whole life. The perfect grade, the scholarship, then declining the scholarship because they begged you not to go. Every life choice you’ve made has been to cater them and their wants. “Yes, dad, my expenses. I have my own car that I pay for by myself, a car loan as well, I even have to buy my own groceries. Then on top of that I send the both of you practically all of my paychecks. I’ve been scraping by trying to make it all work, why can’t the two of you just realize I can’t do this.” Your pleas fall onto deaf ears as they both get up from the couch. “If you aren’t willing to help us then there’s nothing left to talk about. You know where the door is.”

Watching as the walk away tears threaten to spill from your eyes. The drive back to Tannyhill seemed longer than it usually did. The conversation played on repeat throughout the whole drive. Parking your car you rush to the front door, all you want to do is lay in your bed and cry. Tears are already falling from your eyes as you close the front door. “Well what do we have here, country club? This that nanny you keep hiding from me?” You recognize the voice, you’ve seen and heard him around Tanny when Rose or Ward is gone. Barry is his name you think not really caring to find out you just walk down the hall. “Not much of a talker I see.”

“Leave her alone.” Rafe’s voice makes your ears perk up. Even though every muscle in your body is telling you to keep walking and not to look at him, you cave. Eyes meeting he can see the tears in them. “You okay, sunny?” You can’t do this right now, can’t get caught up in him just for him to leave once again. Without saying a word you brush past him, bounding up the stairs to the second floor. But before you can slam your bedroom door you can hear Barry talk. “The fuck you do to her?”

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The next morning you had yourself locked in your room just thinking. First about your parents and then about Rafe, then your parents and Rafe once again. It was torture having to sit in the room replaying ever interaction to see where things went wrong. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to tell you about the Rafe situation but it might for your parents. 

Looking at the clock by the bed you see that it's almost one in the afternoon. Deciding that you can’t sit her a mope for the rest of your life, you get up and get ready. Ward had given you a membership to the country club when you first started, he thought it would be better since you can accompany Wheezie when she goes. A nice relaxing day at the club, eating the fancy food is just what you needed.

It didn’t take long to get there or to find a seat by the pool, most of the people are on the golf course anyway. The only people by the pool are the wives that have kids and the teens who were there for the lifeguard. Stripping from clothes you are left in the red bikini you wore, you put on some sunscreen before laying down on the lounge chair soaking up the rays. 

The sun feels nice against your skin, the heat relaxing your tense muscles finally being given a break. After about thirty minutes you flip over allowing your back to tan, not wanting to be uneven. The sound of kids laughing and the busy club lull you into a peaceful mind. So what if your parents are upset? You have done more than enough to help them out over the years, you can’t keep digging them out of their messes. Who even knows where most of the money you send them goes, it’s definitely not toward the house.

So what if Rafe is a dick who just uses girls and dumps them to the side? You can’t control who he is and clearly he just wanted to hookup nothing more. All that you can do now is just keep to yourself, it’s better to protect your peace then being his new play thing. Then why does it hurt? Shaking off the thoughts you notice how hot you started to get. 

The sun is beating down on you, sweat forming on your skin causing you to stick to the chair. Getting up you head into the pool, the cold warmer cooling you off as you float. You didn’t know this but a few feet away on the dining patio sat Rafe with Topper and Kelce. Rafe was half listening while the two boys talked about something he didn’t care about. His mind kept bringing back the picture of your crying face from last night.

As soon as Barry left he went straight to your room but the door was locked. He sat there for a second and heard nothing from the otherside of the door, assuming you went to bed he left for his room. When he woke up this morning it was all that he could think of, seeing you like that hurt him. You looked like he did after his dad made him feel less of, the thought of you feeling like that made his blood boil. But showing you he cared shows that he needs you, that he actually cares for, that’s not who he is.

No Rafe is the type of guy that fucks everything in his life up, dropped out of school, is a failure to his dad and in relationships. That's what he’s good at, you’ll see it eventually so why even try? Looking out to the course, he can see the pool from here, looking at all the bodies laying around. The red swimsuit draws his eyes down your body, recognizing you as you walk out the pool. The water drips down your stomach, down your legs, but the droplet in between your breasts has him staring. 

Rafe isn’t the only one staring, the few teen boys are staring, then there’s the lifeguard. Rafe remembers him from school and doesn’t like the fact he’s staring at you. He watches as you dry yourself off, putting the shirt and shirt you wore back on. Looking as you gather your things and escape his view as you leave, the boys gather his attention. “Dude are you even listening?” His eyes move back to them “Yeah.” 

You make your way through the halls, carding through your memory to remember how to get to the dining. As you walk, members of the club look at you, judging you for the way your shirt has wet spots from your swimsuit and hair. You decide to sit at the bar not wanting to deal with anyone today. “How can I help you m’lady.” You put the menu down to meet JJ’s gaze. “Oh my god! Jayj hi.” You squeal, catching the attention of patrons including Rafe. 

“I haven’t seen you in a while. Joining the darkside has really changed you.” He looks around before leaning a bit closer. “How is it on the other side? Miss us already?” He teases. “Of course I miss all of you.” You playful push his shoulder, JJ raises his hands up in surrender before resting his body weight on the bar counter arms next to yours. Rafe stares in shock at the scene playing in front of him. You, his girl, flirting with fucking Maybank of all people.

He sees JJ push a piece of hair behind your hair and you giggle. The chair scraping against the floor alerted the boys, he didn’t even realize he was even up and walking over to the two of you. “Where are you going?” Kelce calls out to him. “I’ll be right back.” As he gets closer he can hear your conversation more clearly. “You should come to the bonfire this week. I’ll make it worth your time.” JJ flirts, Rafe coming up right behind you, the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Looking over your shoulder you can see the look of anger on his face and the smirk painted on JJ's face. 

“Sunny! I didn’t know you were going to be here. Maybank why don’t you run along and get me another drink.” He says with a condescending tone, glaring at the blonde boy. “Rafe.” You say as a warning, already seeing how this is going to end. “What? I’m just asking the help to do his job. Right Maybank?” “I was actually helping out this beautiful customer. Ain’t that right baby?” JJ remarks getting closer to you. The look on Rafe’s face could probably kill JJ if he tried hard enough.

Rafe leans against the counter, his body facing you. “You really slumming it around with this loser? You like being around trash?” His comment made you see red.  How fucking dare he? You knew he kinda took the kook and pogue thing seriously but to call them trash. It’s like he forgets that you are also a pogue, that if it wasn’t for his father you would still be living on the cut with the rest of them. Which is true, he doesn't see you as a pogue or the help. 

To him you’re a kook, you belong with them, with him. “Yes I do. Now this trash is going to take itself out like the “help” do.” You say quoting help as a reminder that you also are the help. “I’ll see you around Jayj.” You tell the blonde looking at you with worried eyes before storming off. “Yeah see ya.” He calls out looking at Rafe for a moment. “Man I knew you were dumb but god damn. That’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen you do.” He laughs and walks away to go serve other customers. Rafe knows he’s right, potentially just fucked up whatever the two of you had before it actually really started. More than he has already done by ignoring you for the past day and a half.

He makes his way back to the table, the guys watching as he takes out a wad of cash and throwing it on the table. “I gotta go.” He exclaims, rushing to try and catch you before you have the chance to fully leave. Racing out of the building he sees you in the distance looking for your car. Jogging he catches up to you grabbing your arm and yanking you back to him. “Let go of of me!” You yell at him turning and pushing his chest hard. “No! Come one just talk to me.” He exclaims fighting you to make you stay and hear him out. “Are you kidding me? Talk it out? You just insulted me and my friend.” “No I insulted him. I wouldn’t do that to you.” 

You scoff pulling your arm free from his grip. “So calling him trash just because he’s a pogue doesn’t insult me? I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I’m also a pogue. I came from the cut just like he does. Does that shit actually really mean something to you? Are you that fucking stupid?” Rafe’s been called stupid many times in his life, from Ward, his sisters, hell even Rose has called him stupid. He knows that he makes things difficult and not many people like him. But hearing you call him stupid fills him with more rage then seeing Maybank think he can have his girl. “Hey don’t you fucking dare. Say whatever every the fuck you want but I ain’t stupid you fucking hear me.” 

He grips your cheeks, pinching them together. “Don’t you ever call be stupid again got it?” You should be scared, you’ve seen his temper before, seen him throw shit around the house or get into a fight with people at parties. You don’t know what to do being on the receiving end of his anger, then his words ring in your ear making you angry all over again. That ache in your pants is ignored as you wrench your head out of his hand. “I don’t know what your problem is but if you put your hands on me again you’ll regret it. You think just because everyone else is scared of you that I will be too? News flash buddy I’m not.” “Don’t call me buddy.” His voice was weaker than it was when he was yelling. 

“You don’t get it.” He states turning away from you and letting you go. “You’re right I don’t. You don’t talk to me for two days completely ignoring me after you got what you wanted. Then when I’m catching up with a friend you come in guns blazing as if the world is about to end. What’s wro-“ “He was touching and flirting with you.” He cuts off your rant, stunning you into silence. “So what if he was?” Rafe’s eyes darken hearing you defend him, telling him you actually enjoyed the attention that you were getting from another guy. “So what?” He laughs differently from his normal one, darker than what you are used to.

 “You really think I want some other guy touching you? Do you fuck him too?” “You’re jealous?” You meant it as a statement but it came out more like a question. “Yeah I’m jealous. All those guys in there would give up all their money just to get a chance with you. You don’t know them like I do, they would jump at the chance to get with a beautiful girl.” This is the third time he’s insinuated you are beautiful in some way. “Well maybe I should give them a shot. You obviously” His lips crash to yours, not allowing you to finish. This is different from the other kisses you’ve shared, more intense. He’s trying to tell you he’s scared of losing you, a crazy thought considering you aren’t even his.

How can he feel so strongly for you than he already did? It’s no secret that he’s always had a thing for you but this is different. The thought of you leaving him for another person actually terrifies him. Everyone has left him and he can’t stand the thought of you being another person who walks away. You try fighting him again but all efforts die when his tongue makes its way into your mouth. Rafe has this effect on you that you can’t explain.

There was always this soft spot for him but now that the lines have muddled together it’s hard to separate your feelings. Arms wrap around his shoulder pulling the two of you closer to each other, bodies pressed together. He pulls away from you for a second allowing the two of you to catch your breaths.  “Get in the car. I’ll meet you back at the house.” Fully pulling away you straighten out your clothes that got a little skewed from making out. He goes to walk to his truck, you stop him. “You can’t just get upset like that and make a scene. If this thing between us is going to work you have to talk to me, okay?” Eyes softening looking at your expression he takes a step forward placing a kiss on your forehead. “Okay.” With that he walks away leaving you standing in the middle of the parking lot wondering what the hell just happened.

The both of you race back to Tanny, Rafe’s truck behind your car. Reaching the house, you make your way inside waiting for him to get here, you lost him at a red light on the way over. You go to the kitchen to get water, the sound of the front door opens, Rafe’s footsteps echoing through the hall. “You think you can just go around and flirt with people?” He’s standing in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, white polo stretching around his biceps. “I thought we talk-” “No I’m not done.” He enters the room, staring at your body with dark eyes. “Strip.”

The grip on the water bottle tightens. “What?” Rafe is now in front of you, taking the water from your hands, whipping the stray drop on your lips. His thumb gently pulls your bottom lip before releasing it. “Strip and get on your knees. I need to teach you a lesson, I don’t like people thinking they can have what’s mine.” You look at him before following the instructions, staring up at him as he unbuttons his pants to take his dick out.

“Open.” You do without a second thought. “Good girl.” He mumbles, forcing himself in and setting a brutal pace. You have to catch yourself on his thighs just so you don’t fall, his hand holding you in place. Hips thrusting into you, your throat gladly accepts the intrusion, gargling on his length. Tears pooling on your bottom lashes, spilling down your cheeks, making Rafe go harder on you. “Look at you. A mess of spit and tears for my cock. Think maybank can do this for you?”

He’s still on about what happened at the club, to tell the truth you were too. His jealousy causes mixed emotions in you. On one instance you like seeing how possessive he was for you, on the other he resorts to insults to get his way. You give him a rough suck, eyes meeting his. “Fuck.” Rafe pulls out, yanking you up and bending you over the kitchen island. His body covering yours as he lines himself up, you're so wet that you aren’t worried about the pain. You were sure that he would fit, no preparation needed. “Told you I would bend you over and fuck the shit out of you.”

With that he slammed into you, moaning at the feeling of your walls stretching to accommodate his size. He halts when he’s ball deep, giving you a moment to gather yourself, only a moment. His thrust pushes you further into the island, sure enough to leave marks on your hip tomorrow morning. You don’t even care, he feels too good, the feeling of him stretching you is overwhelming. Whimpers keep leaving your mouth. Rafe grabs your arms, using them as leverage to fuck you harder as he keeps them pinned behind you back by one hand.

“Harder.” You moan out. Your body tingling from all the pleasure he’s giving you, your peak creeping around the corner embarrassingly fast. “Yeah? My little slut wants me to fuck her faster?” The degradation goes straight to your clit, walls fluttering around his length. He goes harder for a few minutes before pulling out, a whine of protest leaving you. “You don’t get to cum yet.” Rafe’s hot breath in your ear, his body heat leaving you too. 

He turns you around and hoists you onto the island, spreading your legs to step in between them. Left hand going to guide himself back into you, gliding across your fold to get you hip and bring you closer to the edge. In this angle he hits you deep, pushing against your cervix with each thrust.

Wrapping a hand around your neck, he squeezes lightly just enough to have your mind all fuzzy. You roll your eyes back grasping onto his bicep, manicured nails digging into his flesh leaving crest shaped marks. Rafe hisses at the sensation enjoying the flash of pain radiating in his arm. He starts fucking you hard, pounding into you having his dick spear into your g-spot. His unoccupied hand takes hold of your hair, pulling you till your foreheads are pressed together. His watch digging into the back of your neck, chested firmly pressed to each other, sharing each breath.

 “Squeezing my dick so fucking good baby. Can you hear how bad your pussy needs it?” Rafe moans out. You can, you’re so wet that every time he fucks into you squelching fills the room. You open your mouth but a particular thrust makes you moan instead. The hand in your hair retracts, your head leaning back slightly, it comes down on your cheek. It wasn’t hard enough to really hurt but enough to have pain heat your face. You moan liking the feeling of the smack, mostly just enjoying the fact that he lost himself to the point of causing a bit of pain. 

“You like me hitting you baby?” When you moan he smacks you again, annoyed that you won’t speak. “Use your words.” Rafe’s hand cupping your jaw staring at your fucked out expression, the hand around your neck tightens as his pace increases. You’re wetness mixing with his pre-cum leaking out of you, making a mess between you two. “I like it sir.” It comes out more like a breath but it counts. “My good little girl. You gonna cum for me? Hmm cum for daddy.” The new nickname was the nail in the coffin, the tightness in your belly finally snapping.

 This feeling was a new thought. It was so intense and it didn’t feel like an orgasim that you’ve had before. Your walls squeeze rage so tight that it pushes him out of you, your release gushing out getting everything wet. “Did you just fucking squirt?” Rafe pushes his dick back in, fucking you harder than before. “Such a dirty fucking slut, squirting and getting everything wet.” Moans keep getting pulled from you, pouring out into his mouth as he sloppily kisses you. “Oh fu-fuck… I’m gonna cum. Where do you want it.” “Inside please.” 

If telling him to cum inside you didn’t make him cum, it was the please that did it. Rafe ruts into you, hips stuttering as he fills you with each squirt of him cum. The warm feeling making you moan and flutter against him. He rides out both of your highs, hips finally stopping when they met yours, keeping you plugged. He want to stay there, wants to just feel you, wrapping his arms around your body. He’s enjoying knowing you are stuffed full of him, that his cum is so deep that it's forced out around him. Pulling out slowly you both hiss, you at the feeling of him spilling from you, and him as he’s fixated watching it come out. 

Kissing you for a moment, Rafe pulls away walking to the sink, wetting a rag before going back to clean you up. The touch is so gentle that it barely hurts. He helps you put your clothes back on dragging the both of you over to the living room. He throws himself down on the couch taking you along with him, pulling you closer . “What happened last night.” You hand playing with his shirt stops. “Huh?” Moving your head to his shoulder you look him in the eyes. “You were crying last night. What happened?” 

“Oh” Trying to shift away from him, being blocked by his arms tightening keeping you in place. “It was just some fight with my parents. It’s nothing.” “It is something, it made you cry.” You wish he would stop trying to pry, it’s not as if he cares. Honestly you expected him to flee once your clothes were back on. Pulling you to the couch was unexpected but asking you to talk about your parents was too much. Too personal. The lines of friendship and having feelings are already getting muddled as it is, this would just push it further. 

“Hey.” It’s soft, lips brushing my forehead before he places a kiss there. “You said we have to communicate, right? Talk to me.” With a sigh you tell him everything. How since you were barely able to work you gave them all your money last night. “They expected me to just hand over 4,000 dollars like it’s nothing. Then when I finally put my foot down I’m a disappointment. Nothing I do anymore is right.” Rafe’s hand rubs your arms trying to soothe you. 

“You aren’t a disappointment. If they can’t handle the fact you have your own life then fuck them.” You slap his chest lightly. “I’m serious. You’ve done more than enough for them, if they can’t see that then it’s their loss." A moment of silence, his words soaking in as you both lay there. “Thank you. I” You don’t know what else to say, fingers tracing shapes along his chest. 

“I know what you’re feeling. My dad um he always lets me know how much of a fuck up I am. I know what it’s like to be a disappointment, you don’t even come close.” The confession felt foreign on his tongue. Rafe never opened up to anyone about his feelings, anytime he tried he was met with a “man up” or “this is how a man handles things”, he’s scared of what you will say. He feels you slip from his arms, closing his eyes not wanting to see you leave him alone, trying to calm the burning behind his eyelids. 

“I don’t think you’re a failure.” Blue eye’s open to meet yours, there’s a hint of vulnerability from what you can see. You lean down pecking his lips, pulling away to get a better look of him. “You’re more than what he sees. It’s a shame he doesn’t take the time to notice.” It was your turn to leave him without words. He’s searching your eyes, your face, for any sign that you were lying. That you were pitying him after he devolved a hidden secret. He knows you’ve heard his Dad yell at him but this is different. 

He can put on a mask after talking to Ward when he has to see you. This time he tore the mask off, wanting you to see him without the facade. “I don’t think that about you.” “Huh?” You respond with confusion filling your face. “I don’t think that you’re trash. You are probably the best thing to come out of Outer Banks.” He’s not lying or at least you don’t think he is. The look in his eyes tells you that he actually means it so you smile down at him. “The best thing huh.” You tease. “Don’t push it.”

#rafe cameron #rafe x reader #rafe obx #outer banks smut #rafe smut #rafe cameron smut #drew starkey smut #drew starkey fanfiction #rafe cameron fanfiction

[harmonicakai]

I Bet on Losing Dogs

Pairing: Beomgyu x Reader

Summary: Your insecurities get the best of you and you abandon your relationship with Beomgyu in the worst way possible.

Tropes: friends with benefits, angst, college AU, band AU

Word Count: 1.3k

Warnings: mentions of sex (mdni), emotional unavailability, slut shaming, no happy ending :-(

A/N: This is SAD because I am currently sad and also I didn’t bother to edit it. Apologies in advance to the Beomgyu biased readers bc I know this is not what anybody asked for </3

“You disappeared Like a faint ghost I bury it in the air What am I to you?” —Ghosting, TXT

You’re a horrible person.

Really, you should’ve broken things off with Beomgyu before they even began. It’s never a good idea to be friends with benefits with somebody you actually like. 

You do your best to distract yourself from confessing your love to him by sleeping with other guys. What started bright and electric between the two of you has fizzled with each encounter, his touch now feeling dull and hollow on your skin.

So, when you wake up next to him after a movie night, your stomach drops when you see the marks he’s left on your neck. Everybody will know what you get up to, if they haven’t already been gossiping about it behind your back.

There’s a numbness to the way you slip out of his apartment without so much as a goodbye. If you had woken him up, he would’ve noticed the sad look on your face and canceled all of his plans to spend the day making you feel better.

You don’t deserve his friendship, let alone his love, although he's only confessed the latter when he thinks you’re asleep and can’t hear him. Or, sometimes Huening Kai will let it slip how much Beomgyu talks about you when they’re away.

The walk home is brutal. You’re even wearing the jacket he’s refused to let you give back to him, knowing that if you had left it behind, he’d surely know something was wrong.

When he notices you’re gone, he shoots you a text about Merriam-Webster’s word of the day. Beomgyu has never cared for linguistics, but he knows you’re a real nerd about this kind of stuff. You decide not to reply.

Things would be much easier if you could just disappear out of his life, but the two of you have become so intertwined that it’s impossible. All of your friends are his friends.

Before him, you were just some quiet girl who shrunk away in the back of the classroom. After getting paired up and reading the poetry you managed to dream up, Beomgyu knew he had to get to know you more.

For most guys, the way he acts with you would come off as desperate. But he’s so earnest in his admiration for you and your talent that there’s simply no way he could possibly be faking it.

The first time you had gotten together was an honest mistake. You had been dumped, again, and he was there for you. It seems like he always is every time another man decides you aren’t worth his time.

It’s not that you don't love him. You do, as much as you’re able to. But you know that if you actually took things to the next level and they didn’t work out, it would break you entirely.

Still, is ghosting him without any sort of reason or explanation any better?

With finals in full swing, you know you’ve got the perfect excuse to be distant for a while. It’s the summertime that you’re worried about. Beomgyu has made sure to include you in every plan of his that he thinks you’d like, sometimes even arranging entire days around you in between his band’s schedules.

Really, the easiest way out is to start dating someone else. It always makes Beomgyu shrink further away from you to know that you will consistently pick someone else over him, although he’s secretly satisfied when things inevitably go sour. He hates knowing that the only thing that drives you into his arms is being rejected by somebody else, but he wants you too much to care.

The two of you talk about everything except how you feel about him, and he knows that he isn’t entitled to any of your emotions. You’ve made it clear from the start that you’re never going to be able to reciprocate in the way that he’d like for you to.

You weren’t always like this. At the start of college, you came in with the idea that you’d fall in love and have your happily ever after. But years of being used for your body and consequently dumped without reason has ripped your heart off your sleeve.

The way Beomgyu worships the ground you walk on makes no sense. You hate yourself. Maybe he just wants something to fix, and once you finally open up to him, he’ll leave you just like everybody else.

The thought makes no sense knowing him, but it’s the driving force in never confessing how you actually feel. So, you offer up yourself physically in the hopes that it’s enough, but it always leaves you feeling empty inside afterward. No amount of kisses or compliments will probably ever change that.

Among his bandmates, you’re closest to Yeonjun. He’s the only one who knows that you love Beomgyu just as much, maybe even more, than he loves you. 

It was revealed through a drunken confession at a frat party the weekend Beomgyu went home for his mom’s birthday, where you immediately got embarrassed and proceeded to go home with the first guy who gave you any sort of attention.

Meaningless sex is really the only way you can get off these days, but the act always leaves you feeling worse than feeling nothing at all with Beomgyu. But if you’re never going to be good enough, pure enough, to truly deserve him, then what’s the harm in another hook up?

You know that every time he finds out you've been with somebody else, you’re breaking his heart. It’s just that there’s so much love from him to go around that it never actually makes a difference in how he treats you. He has the biggest heart you’ve ever seen and you don’t even have the decency to not trample all over it.

You wonder if everybody else also agrees that you’re not good enough for him. They’re so nice whenever you’re around, but you’ve seen men turn into monsters behind your back. For your sake, you try not to think about anybody else's opinion besides Beomgyu’s, but even those thoughts weigh heavy on your shoulders.

After a few days of not returning his texts, he finally musters up the courage to call you. Before you can pick up, your phone sends him to voicemail, and you know that’ll be enough of a sign for him to leave you alone.

It isn’t until you run into him dropping off your poetry final in the writing department’s office that he truly sees what’s become of you.

You haven’t slept properly in days, and you barely eat. Your eyes are constantly puffy from crying all the time, and today is no different. Seeing you like this devastates him.

“Y/N,” he says, his voice shaky and barely above a whisper. He’s got his hand wrapped around your wrist to keep you from running away. His demand for an explanation on where you’ve been and why is stuck inside his throat, and instead, only sobs come out of his mouth.

Beomgyu never cries, and watching as he tries to hide the tears running down his face reminds you that he must be hurting just as much as you are. You want so badly to hold him and apologize, but all you do is stare.

Eventually, he manages to collect himself as much as he can, taking in the irreparable damage you’ve caused one last time.

“Here,” he says, digging in his backpack and handing you a stapled stack of papers. It’s his final project. “I’ll go print another. I want you to read these. Please, promise me you’ll read them.”

You accept the papers, your eyes skimming over the lines of poetry on the first page. It's about you. You flip through the rest of the stack. They're all about you.

It takes everything in you not to start crying too, although you’re so exhausted that you don’t think anything would even come out at this point.

“I promise,” you assure him, although neither of you know if you’re telling the truth.

—————-

Taglist: @orangesodafoam @deezbutz28 @ur-mother-realnotclickbait @iyeeeverydee @internet-folks @darlingz99 @foxyjun @stardustmooncakes @giaalorine @beomgyubabybear @niningtori @goquokka @csbenthusiast @moarmyjkhk @lizdevorak @sooberryworld @lonelybutterflytae @midnight-mochii @theresawtf @nowadays56 @jjklvr9 @baekberrie

P.S.: Please shoot me an ask or a reply if you’d like to be added to (or removed from) the taglist! I struggle to keep up with different lists for individual members, but if you really don't want to be tagged on all of my works, just let me know and I will do my best to make a note <3

#txt #tomorrow x together #txt imagines #txt fic #txt x reader #txt fluff #txt angst #beomgyu x reader #beomgyu #beomgyu txt #choi beomgyu #txt beomgyu #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu angst #beomgyu smut #beomgyu imagines

[bellasprettywords]

Hey, I love your writing! I was wondering if you’d do a little something based off of the lyrics “Well, every once in awhile, she'll find my number in her phone and we'll talk for hours She'll tell me things I would have never known about when we were together She's saying, "Sorry, it's just such a long walk home" So she's coming over cause it's better than being alone” Spencer Reid x female reader. I was thinking more like a Midwest emo alt type of character, totally not someone you’d expect Spencer to go for?

I think your nose is bleeding (Spencer Reid x Reader)

Thank you very very much for the request!! I hope you like this little one shot, because I didn't know the song, but I hope I could meet your expectations🩷✨

My masterlist

Requests are always open🥰

Warnings: Mmm apart of it being a little messy, I think there's nothing, but it fluff

Word count: 1,232

y/n – your name

Spencer and you were kind of an odd couple, excuse me, a couple of friends for the untrained eye. While he’s a trained scholar with a collection of PhDs on Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering; with an impressive job as a profiler at the FBI, which most of the time had him travelling all around the country, and a shy personality with socially awkward tints, and a genius brain. You are a tattoo artist with a free spirit, a soft spot for poetry, love for sassy comebacks, and a special love for midwest emo music. Once upon a time, almost a year ago, Spencer and you were a couple, but the two of you decided to leave things as friends, because your lifestyles were quite different, which made a relationship considerably difficult for you. However, the two of you decided to stay friends, which seemed kind of easier as you established a set of rules to make sure everything between the two of you could flow naturally.

Even if it was as friends, you knew that the two of you seemed like polar opposites, but the love you shared always made you be better for each other, growing up, learning about the other’s point of view, and becoming empathetic, even if you didn’t see eye to eye under certain circumstances. After your break-up, Spencer and you learned to compromise and commit to make sure the friendship could work, sure, sometimes it was hard considering his packed schedule, and your love for spontaneous adventures.

It was a little later than you would usually close the tattoo studio, so you decided to call Spencer to see what he was up to; you hadn’t talked in a while, so you weren’t even sure if he was in the city, but it was worth it to take the shot.

“Hey, y/n, it’s nice to hear from you” you heard Spencer’s voice through the phone

“How are you, mighty Doctor Reid?” you asked excited because, deep down, you were really longing to hear Spencer’s voice

“I’m… I’m alright, you know, just doing my thing; how are you? It’s been ages” he said trying to hide his own excitement to hear from you. Sure, you were friends, but deep down Spencer hoped that with time and more organization, maybe someday the two of you could rekindle your previous relationship

“It’s only been a couple of weeks, but I know what you mean! I’ve missed you Spence, I hope I’m not interrupting you at work or anything” you said, walking to your car

“No, I’m just home solving a puzzle, and deciding what to order for dinner” he said

“Uh, that’s nice, I was actually thinking about going to Little India to get take out. I’m really craving chicken curry, want anything?” you said jokingly, pretty sure Spencer wouldn’t catch the subtext

“Uh… sure, some chicken tikka masala and flatbread would be pretty amazing, thank you for asking” Spencer said, ensuring you he didn’t catch the joke

“An order or chicken tikka masala, white rice, and flatbread, coming right up” you said getting ready to hang up the call, when Spencer interrupted

“Wait, don’t hang up” he said as you turned on your car engine “I want to go with you, if that’s okay, I mean, if it’s not an imposition” he stuttered this time

“It would be delightful, sure, I love talking to you” you said with a shy smile forming on your lips, “What have you been up to? Any cool cases I can know about?” you asked Spencer

“I flew in today from Atlanta, we went to solve a case there” Spencer stared telling you all about the case, the unsub and how the team managed to save the victims that were abducted, when a car cut you off and honcked at you

“Jerk” you said under your breath

“y/n! are you okay? what was that?” Spencer asked frantically

“I’m okay, I’m okay, it was just some jerk” you said hoping to soothe Spencer’s concern “Did you know I hate driving?” you asked the young doctor

“I didn’t know that” he said sounding quite surprised at your revelation

“I really do! That’s why I’d always ask you if we could carpool when we were together” you confessed

“Hu… That would’ve been useful information back then” he said, making sure of making a mental note about that, to ensure to drive you whenever he could do it

The two of you kept talking, and the 40-minute drive that you needed to get to your favorite Indian restaurant, suddenly felt like a 5-minute stroll with the one you loved. Talking to Spencer like this felt amazing, it was peaceful, it almost felt natural like breathing, he always had the right words for you and even when you paused the conversation for a little while, the silence between the two of you was incredibly comfortable. You arrived at your destination and while you were ordering the food, Spencer stayed on the line with you, speaking about an impressive number of folkloric Indian stories, and facts about the country. You picked up the food and drove to Spencer’s apartment, this time, the drive was quite short, but that didn’t mean it was least pleasant with Spence’s rambling

When you arrived to the apartment building, Spencer was already downstairs waiting for you

“Hey boy-genious, I was at least hoping I could separate the orders before giving them to you” you said, a little butt hurt that apparently, Spencer didn’t even want you on his apartment

“What are you talking about? I’m here to help you carry the bags upstairs” he said a little confused by your comment

“Oh, I thought… Never mind” you said brushing off the butterflies that starter fluttering inside your stomach

“I’m really glad you called, you had no idea how much I missed you” Spencer said as you were entering the apartment building

“I missed you too Spence” you said

The night went amazingly, and the damn butterflies wouldn’t go anywhere. The two of you eat dinner together, and it almost felt as you have never broken up, the conversation flowed, and you could feel how this was one of those moments you’d always treasure in your heart

“I should get going, it’s a really long drive home” you said as soon as the clock struck 12:00 am

“Don’t go, please, just… stay the night” Spencer pleaded with his puppy eyes

“I really shouldn’t” you replied, avoiding eye contact with Spencer. Sure, one would argue that a friend can stay over at another friend’s apartment, but you knew that with Spencer it would be complicated, especially as you weren’t over him yet

“I’m begging you, I may seem alright, but as soon as I go to bed without you I feel so… empty and alone. This apartment is not the same without you, as a matter of fact, my life is not the same without you” Spencer said taking your chin so you could look at him in the eye

“If I stay the night, I may never leave” you said, gifting Spencer a side smile

“Maybe I just don’t want you to leave” Spencer said, leaning forward and starring intensively into your eyes, so you did what any normal person who has the object of his or her desire would’ve done: you leaned forward, and kissed Spencer

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid scenario #spencer reid drabble #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fanfiction #dr spencer reid #dr spencer reid x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds #spencer reid headcanon #spencer reid fandom #doctor spencer reid #spencer reid criminal minds

[obsessedwrhys]

The Seven and The Boys with forced supe reader(like Billy’s little sister as revenge for billy and the boys constantly causing problems)

Rouge powers reader————powers turn on and off randomly

can absorb life forces and powers(which they can steal(albeit accidentally))

Very stubborn and sarcastic just like her brother

Home lander is probably extra yandere for tons of reasons and keeps the reader in a glass room(enclosure or whatever)(think a zoo exhibit or big aquarium tank without water—— that one room from You or the glass apartment In Supernova for the kid with the same sort of powers)so that he can see his pet/prize/whatever tf he plans to do with them

-🌑

I keep seeing this as a full blown fic in my mind but I don’t have the skills to pull it off so I’d like to see other people’s takes on the idea!

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ The Boys x Rogue!Reader

ᯓ★ I read your req and I'm intrigued so this is my attempt on it, hope it meets your expectations. This is like a full on story lol (angst, gore, death, killing, looooots of cursing like I'm not even exaggerating, homelander being homelander, some fluff at the end?)

With your brother's reputation, it's hard to ever live your whole life without the constant need to look over the shoulder. You always liked to tell yourself that after cutting ties with him, it will ensure you your safety, but those words were nothing more than just lies.

Losing Becca changed him completely. You could still recall the last time you spoke to him, the talk regarding your concern escalating into a heated argument.

"I'm telling you! You have no chance against a literal superpowered person! You'll get yourself killed!" You raised your voice, standing on the other side of the kitchen counter.

"Yeah, but this ain't a life worth livin' for anyways" He brushed your words off like he usually does. You watch in disbelief as he pours himself alcohol.

"Fuck you. You're such an asshole..." You said and he nods at you as he lifts his glass up.

"I'll drink to that" You scoff when he actually drank from his cup, the sound of him sipping ticking you off.

"Okay, fine, get yourself killed! But I won't stand to be here when it happens. I want you out of my life. I never wanna see you. I never even want to hear from you again! You're... you're..." You gasp as you start to sob. He turns to you, nothing but a blank expression on his face.

"Hey... take it easy—"

"No! Don't you fucking tell me to take this shit easy when you just admit to me that you're willing to throw away your life for some blonde american supe! You are a shitty brother! You're just like dad!"

"Don't you fuckin' compare me to that cunt!"

"I fucking said what I said!"

"Fuck you!"

"FUCK YOU!!"

The sound of your heavy breathing filled the kitchen. You could feel your chest rising and falling, your face burning from the overwhelming anger. Butcher sighs at the sight of you as he looks away with his eyes closed.

"You don't know half the things I know sis... you have to understand..."

"No... don't bother telling me. I already know that you'll never change..." You grabbed your things and before he could stop you, you left the house, slamming the door while you were at it.

For the next 8 years, you would find yourself living somehow a happier life. Making friends, going through relationships and heartbreaks, getting multiple jobs to pay for your apartment. It was like an ocean wave since it was never steady but you couldn't deny you've never felt more alive.

However, even on these good days, there were nights you'd find yourself waking up to nightmares. Nightmares of your brother dying. Nightmares of being abandoned. It always left you covered in cold sweats and sometimes you couldn't go back to sleep so you'd just sit by the window or watch some videos online to keep your mind off it.

Even though you convince yourself you were happier.

You never felt secure.

You always felt like something was out to get you.

Especially after you saw the news of him theorised to have killed the senior vice president working at Vought. You couldn't bother to remember her name cause the image of your brother was hauntingly enough. That's when you realised, if they were after him, what if they were also after you?

You stood at the counter of the restaurant you worked at. The job was new as you interviewed for the role of the cashier. Though all these days of dealing with rude customers and having to force a smile is making you want to rethink a different job. Just then, the door to the restaurant opens.

"Welcome!" You said as cheerfully as you can. Instead of searching for a table to sit, the customer approaches you.

"I'm sorry but where's the restroom? I really need to go" The customer spoke, he was wearing an awfully lots of layers, even shades indoors.

"It's just at the back to the right, there's a huge sign, it's hard to miss it" You smiled and the customer stares at you for a while before nodding.

"Thank you"

Finally, he leaves and you couldn't help but be relieved. Why were you holding your breath in the first place? After a couple more hours of standing around and smiling, your shift was done. You did your daily duties and cleaned up the place, making sure it was clean before you leave.

"Bye (Y/N)! Don't forget about our hangout this Friday night!" Your friend spoke as she leaves first.

"Trust me I'm looking forward to it!" You replied before heading to the back of the building to throw the trash away.

You were on your way to the huge bins until you felt the trash bag become lighter. You stare down and was annoyed the second you saw that the bag had tore. It's settled, you're getting a new job after you get your salary. You crouched down and tried to think of ways to solve the issue.

Once you stood up, you felt a sharp pain on your neck. Before you could even do anything to find the source of the pain, you collapsed. The last thing you could feel before becoming unconscious was the touch of someone catching you.

....

"Will it work?"

........

"We've only tested on rats. We're not sure sir"

...........

"Do I have to rephrase? If she dies, you fucking die with her, you understand?"

...............

"Yes sir"

.....................

"Good. Now do what you're only good for, you fucking worthless piece of shit"

...............................

Lights... knives... syringes... you slowly awoke on the floor as faint images of what you would recall as a memory began flashing in your head. Did that happen? It felt real. You opened your eyes and blinked a couple of time to register the room you were in.

You were... in a cage?

You looked around, the walls and floors made of white marbles which made it cold when your skin made contact with it. Now that you realised, you were no longer in your uniform, you seemed to be wearing some kind of gown patients would wear for surgery.

"Morning sunshine!" Your body jumped when you heard a familiar voice, a voice you only heard on the tv or radio shows. You stare at him as he walks to the center, a few feet from your cage.

It was Homelander. You never thought the day would come where you would be face to face to the person behind the reasons of your brother's rampage.

"Did you rest well?" He asks, an eary grin on his face. You looked around the inside of your glass cage.

"Couldn't you have given me a mattress?" You said. Your concern catching him a bit off guard but he didn't show it.

"Well, we tried to give you something more comfortable to sleep on but it seems like anyone who tried to even touch you ended up well... what's the word for it... withered. Dead. Nothing but a corpse suck dry of it's life" He said but you had no idea what any of his words meant.

"Is this some joke?" He chuckles.

"No. No joke (Y/N). I'm simply just giving my hypothesis on your new powers"

Powers? You have to be high right?

Did whatever pain that you felt was the mark of your death?

Is this some sick twisted illusion of yours created in hell?

"Yeah right... and I'm fucking Beyonce. Would you like to see my collection of Grammys?" You said sarcastically, clearly not taking anything seriously.

Homelander doesn't say anything but just laugh, since you were clearly convinced this was hell and that you were dead, you laughed along with him. He trembles his shoulders as if he's cold, that devilish grin still on his face.

"Wooo! You're a jokester aren't you (Y/N)? I know I'm just gonna love you. How about I bring you a gift as a symbol of our blossoming friendship?" He asked but he had already left the room. Your answer never even needed at all.

As your laughter died down, you were left alone in the room. You felt high. Too realistically high. Were you pumped with drugs? Shit... you grabbed your head as you tried to process the feeling until you heard the sound of a high pitched scream. You turn your head to find it to be your friend from work. She was shoved into the room and right when she stood up to leave, the door was shut.

"Let me the fuck out! You fucking bitch! You promised me weed!" She slammed on the door a couple of times after attempting to twist the doorknob open.

"Cleo?" She turns to you, her masacra ruined from her tears.

"(Y/N)? Holy shit what happened to your hair?" She said and you were confused until you checked to see the front strands of your hair now dyed white.

Okay now what in the actual fuck is happening...

"I don't know...? Why are you here?" You questioned.

"Some fucker promised me weed for some cash. I should have known better when I saw how cheap it was" She sighs as she sits against the door.

Suddenly the glass door on your cage sprung open. The two of you exchanged confused expressions. Is this some kind of trick? You wondered but either way you stepped out from your cage and began to approach your friend. She sighs as she curls up into a ball.

"What the fuck even is this place...?" She asks after you finally sat down beside her. You rubbed her arm to provide some comfort.

"I don't know... this feels real and fake at the same time. Hey, if by any chance we were in a puzzle just like in Saw, how much do you wanna bet who'd win—?" You nudged her playfully but instead of getting a response. She falls over.

Her face was pale white. Eyes dilated. The veins on her body growing visibly purple. The sight left you in shock and you quickly grabbed her by the shoulder to jerk her a few times. No words left her mouth except sounds of gasping, as if the air was getting sucked out of her lungs.

"Cleo! What the fuck! Holy fucking shit!" You cursed and it didn't take long until her body grows limp. Like a skeleton with a thin layer of skin left.

Afraid the same would happen to you, you quickly ran into your cage. You sat at the corner, trying your hardest not to look at your friend. That was real. This isn't some stupid trick set up by Satan. This is fucking real.

But why is this happening?

Why you?

The glass door slammed shut and the noise made your body jump. The door to the room opened but got stuck at the weight of your friend's corpse. You could hear the sound of disgust come from Homelander as he ends up kicking body aside to be able to open the door fully.

"So... did you like my gift?"

"What the fuck did you do? Did you poison her?" You said which he seemed offended at.

"Me? Oh please, I can shoot fucking lasers out of my eyes and I choose to poison some fucking nobody? I mean look at her" He chuckles, his eyes staring at the corpse of what was your friend.

His tone and words growing a small wave of anger within your chest.

"What do you want from me?"

"You know what I want" He said, the smile on his face gone. He was now serious. His gaze cold enough to send shivers down your body.

"(Y/N) Butcher. Butcher. I didn't know he had a little sister" He took a step closer, then another, until he was face to face to the glass, staring down at your figure hiding away in the corner.

"He really doesn't get scared huh? Not afraid of death, to take a life, not even me. And well... since he fucking hates supes so much, then I might as well make his beloved sister one. If I can't strike fear in him, you will" Homelander spoke, the corner of his lips twisting into a grin. As if all of this was bringing him some sick enjoyment.

"Everyone will be the pawn and you'll be the queen... so save your strength. You're gonna need it sweetheart" He turned around and as he leaves, he stares at the corpse for a quick moment. Even from inside the cage you could hear him shout for the people working to clean the body.

Fuck... this cannot be your life now...

You're now an animal kept in a cage.

Hours progressed to days then months. The only thing keeping you entertained was... the toilet? Aside from that was the visits Homelander would pay you every now and then to make sure you were alive. It almost seemed like he had expected you to be dead by now but you weren't, which he's impressed about.

You laid on the ground, staring at the ceiling. You were bored so you decided to try to count from 1 to 10000 this time. Just as you got to 482, the door opened and you turned to see it wasn't Homelander but rather a worker. Assuming he's just here to clean, you turned back to the ceiling to continue counting.

"Pssh, ma dame, do you hear me?" He knocks on the glass, his french accent caught your attention.

"I don't care. I'm not gonna strip for you"

"Nono! That's not why I'm here, your brother, Billy Butcher? He sent me here" His name striking something in you. You got up as your eyes are slightly widened.

"He knows I'm here?"

"Yes... he's here as well. He's gonna try to get you out of here"

Just as he finishes talking, the glass door sprung open. He gets in the cage and reaches for you but right as you reach for his hand, you remembered you weren't the same anymore, you were cursed, so you quickly pull your hand away. Your action causes the man to tilt his head in confusion.

"Do not worry, I'm not here to hurt you" He tries to take a few steps closer but you quickly stepped back.

"No.... no stop! That's enough!" You raised your hands gesturing him to stand where he's at.

"Don't touch me..." You added and he stares at you for a moment before taking a few steps back until he's out of the cage.

"Okay... but you must follow me. We don't have much time left" He said, walking out of the room and you hesitated for a while before following after him.

When walking down the hallway, you couldn't help but look around the area. This was your first time seeing the place you've been trapped inside for supposedly months. As you followed the strange man who saved you, you noticed that he seemed to be talking to someone over his earpiece. Was it Butcher?

After managing to sneak past several guards and having a few close calls, you two finally made it out from one of the back doors. You hurried as you followed the man somewhere. You couldn't believe it. The feel of the wind and the smell of the grass was making you wish you appreciated the outdoor more.

"Were you noticed?" His friend who's been on the look out asked. He shakes his head.

"No" After hearing his reponse, his friend turns to look at you.

"I'm M.M.... C'mon, your brother put in a lot to save you" He began walking away and the two of you simply went along.

He did?

"I haven't introduced myself. I'm Frenchie. It's nice to meet you" The man who saved you earlier said with a smile and you weakly smile back.

The moment the three of you reached a van parked in a safe area. The door slide open and your eyes widened once you were locked eyes with someone familiar. Yet he looked so much different now. He grew a beard. You had to admit, it made him look less ugly.

"(Y/N)..." He got out of the van and was ready to embrace you but you quickly avoided his grasp. This causes him to stand there with his arms hanging there awkwardly.

"Ooookay.... get in" M.M told Frenchie and they did just that, sliding the door close to give you both the privacy.

"All these years and you still hate your ol' brother" He jokes as he drops his hands down to his sides, but it was clear that he was upset at your actions and trying to hide it.

"Don't touch me"

"I got it"

The two of you stood there and you were staring at him a little too hard. Thoughts racing in your head like a racetrack. What the fuck has he been up to these years and how did he even find you?

"So... are we jus' gonna stand here and wait for 'em to realise you're missin'?" He nods at the facility nearby and you sigh.

"You're taking me home" You walked over to the passenger seat but the sound of Butcher clicking his tongue made you stop halfway in your tracks. Now you were standing in front of the van.

"Not gonna happen. Is your head loose of screws sis? They know who you are now, which means they know where you live. You're gonna be stayin' with me" He said.

Shit... there's really no chance of a normal life now. You really are cursed.

"Stay with you? With these guys?" You point at the van and from the front of the vehicle, you could see his friends all huddled in the back, the whole time they've been secretly listening to the conversation but once you pointed at them, they tried to act as though they haven't been doing so.

"They can protect you"

"I don't need protecting. The last thing I need is someone doing that"

"Oh really? Then mind sharing your experience in there? Was it a luxury? How much longer do you think you could have lasted if I hadn't found you" He took a few steps closer and you gave him a warning look.

"You're my sister... you think a few fights is gonna change that?" He tried reaching for your shoulder and you quickly dodged it. Failing to notice, tears were beginning to well up in your eyes because deep inside, you were desperately in need of comfort, a hug, anything physical but you couldn't even have that.

"You can't touch me... nobody can.... f-fuck... I killed my friend just by touching her..." You began to sob, your hands grabbing onto your face in an attempt to hide your expression. A frown appears on his face.

"What the fuck did they do to you...?"

"They made me a freak! They gave me these fucked up powers!! I don't want this...!" You cried, wishing this was another of your nightmares and that none of this was real.

"It's okay... come here..." He began to step closer to you but you were too numb from the feeling to even react.

Taking off his coat, he puts it securely around you before wrapping you in his arms. For the first time in months, you finally felt the presence of another person's embrace. The warmth felt so good. It was like you were melting from it. Your sobs grew weak as you nuzzle onto his chest, the fabric separating the contact of your skin with his. This was everything you needed right now.

"We'll get through this... these powers of yours ain't gonna scare me away" He said, rubbing your back gently.

"Thank you..." You muttered.

After you escaped and made it safely away from your prison. Homelander was alerted of your escape a few hours later. He arrives at the facility, walking down the hallway as the doctors walking by were scared to see him and trying their best to avoid his sight. Once he walks in the office of the head security, the man sprung up almost instinctly.

"Sir" He greets him. Homelander doesn't say anything but stare at him... before breaking into a smile.

"Great job, at least you're good at failing at your job. Now show me" He walks over to the guard's side who's hurrying to click a few things on his computer to show him what he came here for.

"The tracker we planted in her is working well and fine. She's currently in a vehicle heading somewhere"

"Good... it's like sending a cat to a bunch of rats" Homelander then gave the man a strong pat on the shoulder.

"Do we go after them sir?"

"No, keep an eye on her for now. I'll tell you when the time is ready" Without any further discussion, he left the office. A plan already set in his mind.

(I might make a part 2 but I'm not sure if anyone would be interested, it'll be sort of fluff where the boys figure out her powers, some angst? Idk, tell me if you think I should)

#Homelander: haha got your nose 🤪 #can i get some fries and a big mac #the boys amazon #the boys #the boys frenchie #the boys butcher #the boys mothers milk #the boys kimiko #the boys billy butcher #the boys hughie #the boys x you #the boys x y/n #the boys x reader #the boys x female reader #butcher x reader #homelander x reader #x reader #angst #the boys angst #frenchie x reader #hughie x reader #mm x reader #kimiko x reader #the boys homelander #homelander #fluff

[killsatoru]

INDIGO : Gojo Satoru

Pairing : Gojo Satoru x fem! reader

Warning(s) : Cursing

Summary : Gojo Satoru your roommate who turns out to surprisingly be your coworker! Will him being your roommate cause any issues at work?

-

My roommate Satoru Gojo, a very attractive, and charming man.

Though I barely ever interacted with him, he was still a mystery to me, well not completely.. From what Suguru has told me : he has a crazy ex-girlfriend, comes from a wealthy background, is quite smart when he wants to.. and. hm.

That's all I can remember!

I've only interacted with him a total of two times.. and that’s including when Suguru introduced him to me and our now shared apartment, the second time was when I asked him if he wanted anything from the market when he was watching a random horror movie in the living room.

Maybe I should put a little more effort into getting to know the guy… I mean we’ve been living together for nearly 7 months. Nah it isn’t worth it.

Getting ready to head out the door for work, I hear a small whisper of my name “Y/N, you heading out?” Satoru Gojo in the flesh, just barely able to keep his eyes open, “Yes, sorry if I woke you up.” silence followed just as i was opening the door ready to step out “Have a nice day Y/N” turning my head slightly to see him giving me a lazy smile “You too Gojo, you should get some more rest it’s quite early” reciprocating his smile, stepping out and closing the door behind me i felt chills run down my spine ‘what was that about?!?’

-

Walking into my place of work I was greeted by “Y/N!!” Utahime Lori, my assistant and close friend since college, “what’s got you in such a great mood Utahime?” nearly jumping off the walls from her excitement “Apparently Mr. Gojo will be hiring someone to help us with the workloads! That means no more overtime!! THE HEAVENS HAVE HEARD US THEY WILL BE SENDING AN ANGEL!!!!” letting out a small laugh “probably means the person has personal connections or is extremely wealthy..” “shhh let me have this moment Y/N” placing her finger to my lips

Knock knock

“Ms. L/N, Mr. Gojo has requested for you”

-

Walking down the unnecessary long hallway to get to Mr. Gojo's Office, he was always calm and collective. He was a man I have admired for a long time, without him I wouldn't be in the position I'm in.

“Sir Ms. L/N is here as you requested” bowing down slightly I followed suite “Good Morning Mr. Gojo” sitting behind his desk, his white hair trimmed and slicked back in place, suit tailored to perfection. Sitting in front of him back facing me was a messy mop of white hair reminding me of my roommate

‘holy shit it’s my roommate!!!???’

“ah! good morning Y/N please have a seat next to my son” sitting down next to my roommate, ‘wait my roommates father is my fucking boss WHAT THE FUCK!’ now internally panicking ‘okay okay calm down Y/N, you haven’t really done anything i mean your roommate barely knows you! most of your furniture is pretty basic, you barely have any pictures of your family, just one of your brother and sister-in-law.. calm down, calm down, he can’t possibly talk shit about you, can he?!??’

“I believe you were made aware of a new hire, correct Y/N?” responding calmly as possible “ Yes Mr. Gojo, I was made aware.” smiling “Good, my son here Satoru will be placed under your wing, i’ve told him already that he should start taking this job more seriously, he is heir of my throne after all-” cutting his father off “Father i’ve told you already-“ “Satoru, you will be under the supervision of Ms. Y/N L/N, I suggest you behave and learn a thing or two about discipline, instead of worrying about a future with a woman who only loves your money and your looks.” glancing between the two, the tension so suffocating “i’ve already told you that-“

Knock knock

Utahime walking in “Ms. L/N, your meeting with Mr. and Mrs. Fushiguro is in 20 minutes”

“If you’ll excuse me Mr. Gojo” bowing down slightly, turning towards the door “Ms. Y/N, please take Satoru and show him how these exchanges work” “Yes Mr. Gojo.” raising his voice slightly “Go on Satoru.”

‘I am so Screwed’

-

“I’m shocked Mr. Fushiguro was willing to work with us! how did you even manage to snag Y/N!” sighing “I didn’t ‘snag’ anyone, the team that was assigned to close the deal with Mr. Fushiguro failed, and called me in to fix it.” “that’s snagging! but he was quite stubborn; he only wanted you to meet with them, you must’ve done something to leave a good impression!!” looking out the window “yeah..” glancing towards my roommate through the reflection of the window ‘he’s been quiet the whole ride, wondering if his father knows we live together.. whatever, I don’t care as long as he doesn’t get in my way.’

-

“Ms. L/N! lovely to see you again!” Both of them smiling warmly at me embracing me in a hug “It nice to see you as well Mr. and Mrs. Fushiguro! How has your son been?” “Oh! That boy is quite energetic. It's exhausting to handle him” Giggling lightly “I'm glad he’s healthy.” “Oh! But what about your son! how has he been” Feeling two pairs of eyes behind me nearly burning a hole into my skull “Yuji has been good he’s staying with his grandparents, i’ll probably go see him this weekend.” “That's good, you shouldn’t tire yourself out now L/N!” “That’s right, don’t think we don’t know about all your late nights and countless meetings Y/N L/N” Scratching the back of my head nervously.

“And who might this be L/N” Turning to introduce my roommate and best friend/assistant “This is Gojo Satoru, a new hire who is here to observe and my assistant Utahime Lori, if it isn’t too much of an issue they will be joining us today.” Mr. Fushiguro ready to begin “Please have a seat, you three. Shall we discuss the deal then”

-

“Excellent. you Ms. L/N have a deal.” Holding his hand out “Thank you again Mr. Fushiguro.” Shaking hands sealing the deal. “As agreed on, we'll start the production by next month” “Perfect thank you again Mr. and Ms. Fushiguro!” “Don’t overwork yourself too much!!” “I won't. Thank you again”

-

“Good job Y/N! Mr. Gojo will be pleased!” Smiling at me brightly she’ll surely leave me blind “It was nothing really..” “But how do they know about Yuji?” Both Utahimes and Gojos' heads turn to me feeling a little nervous “it’s.. a long story.” “And how do they know about your work schedule and countless hours of overtime and-“

Ring Ring Ring

Of course it rings when it isn’t needed! “Y/N speaking.”

“Understood. Yes.”

Sigh ‘this day can’t get anymore stranger’

“Mei Mei flaked out again” Announcing the news i received through the phone “Seriously AGAIN?!?” anger laced in Utahimes voice “Ugh we should have a new contract with actual models, that will actually do their job!” “Calm down, I have a back up.” “BUT STILL! I wouldn’t care if she also wasn’t such a-“ being cut off by Gojo “Bitch.” Catching both Utahime and I off guard “Mr. Gojo.. I didn't know you had it in you to say that! WHOA!”

“Calm down you two, I have a back up. I'll discuss with Suguru and Kento about canceling the contract.”

Ring Ring Ring

“Y/N speaking” Laughing a little

“Of course you were just the person I needed”

“Understood i’ll be arriving shortly” Sigh

“Was it ‘Kento~’” Fluttering her lashes and puckering up her lips “Seriously you two should just runway get married have 10 kids and-“ Cutting her off “Enough of your blabbering how do you even come up with all of this!” Giving me a glare “Well You two have danced around each other since college, and now you two work at the same company of course I have enough information and sources to come up with your whole love story~!” Running a hand across my face “God damn it you’re a lunatic” Sigh “Hey! if you two didn’t work so much I could’ve had a niece and nephew running around already!” “You have yuji.” Pouting a little “You’re right but you and Kento-“ Cutting her off this time placing my hand on top of her mouth “That’s enough for today, It’s bad enough that i have an emergency meeting and countless paperwork to complete” “Hm Hmph MpM!” Removing my hand now covered in spit “We have Gojo! he can help you know”

Thank you for reading! honestly this was a second attempt at this concept don’t really like it but its better than the first attempt.

#gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojo smut #jjk gojo #jujustsu kaisen x reader #gojo x y/n #jujutsu gojo #eventual smut

[tenebraevesper]

Sonadow Moments in Sonic Cyber Revolution (The Final Haunt Arc)

[...]

''Got it!'' Amy nodded, with Sonic curling up into a ball and hit him with her hammer. Sonic flew above the Buzz Bombers, right towards the Egg Hornet. However, Eggman saw this, pressing another button that unleashed another homing missle, hitting Sonic mid-air and knocking him out.

''Sonic!'' Lucas shouted as the cobalt hedgehog fell, dazed from the explosion, while Eggman laughed gleefully that he got the last hit on his nemesis.

There was a sudden flash of light blue light, with a dark figure catching Sonic mid-air, followed by another flash of light, with both the dark figure and Sonic landing on the ground safely. Sonic groaned in pain, feeling dazed and his vision clearing as he looked up at the person who saved him and was currently carrying him bridal style.

''Shadow?'' Sonic was stunned to see his rival.

''You can't go one day without running into trouble, do you?'' Shadow responded. Sonic's eyes narrowed.

''I don't think you're the one to talk about avoiding trouble,'' he responded.

Shadow avoided his gaze, clearly feeling troubled, but then added in an irked tone, ''Do you want me to drop you, Faker?''

''Nah, I'm good. Feels nice being carried around,'' Sonic responded, smirking. Shadow just rolled his eyes and dropped him regardless, with Sonic hitting the ground with a hard 'thud'.

[...]

''I suppose this brings us to what I had experienced,'' Rouge said, sitting on the table, her legs crossed. ''I can verify that your friends had indeed been abducted by Mephiles and his partner, but I don't really know what exactly had happened before I had arrived.'' Her eyes narrowed as she added in a more serious tone, ''Whatever they had done to your friends, it broke Touka. The last I saw her, she seemed to have suffered from some kind of mental breakdown. She just… shut down.''

''I guess that explains why Shadow left so soon,'' Sonic commented, his tone solemn.

[...]

''Honestly, I think it would be a good idea to give them some time and space to process what had happened,'' Makoto suggested. ''We can talk to them once they're ready.''

''I think that's a good idea,'' Lucas replied, glancing at Sonic. The latter had his head lowered, clearly thinking about his teammates. Lucas knew his partner well enough to be aware that Sonic wouldn't let this be so easily.

xXx

Three days… Three days of complete radio silence from both Touka and Shadow. Lucas had sent Touka a message to ask her how she's doing, but there was no reply. She didn't even read it.

''We should go check on them.''

''I'm not sure. You know that neither Touka and Shadow have a tendency to check their messages. Maybe we should leave them alone for the time being.''

''I don't think so. What if they never answer?''

''…''

Sonic frowned as he sped through the streets of Neos City, the conversation he had with Lucas still echoing in his head. He knew that Lucas was worried about Touka and Shadow, but unlike his partner, he felt that they should actually confront the two rather to leave them on their own. Still, he agreed to wait. Fortunately, he didn't have to worry about Eggman, as the Doctor didn't show up after the attack three days ago. He and the rest of the gang had figured that he was occupied with something else, with Rouge having admitted that she did mess with the computer at the Egg Base, so he would remain busy with that.

So, in the meantime, Sonic decided to occupy himself with testing out his new ability, which he referred to as the ''Boost''. He had figured out that, in order to trigger it, he would have to remain focused and steady while he increased his speed in small bursts. It did drain him of his own energy, but it was something he could use without using Chaos Surge, so he felt it was worth it. While his stamina was finite, he had more than enough of it for the training sessions. As a matter of fact, he actually wanted to show off his new ability to Shadow, maybe challenge him to a race. However, given the current circumstances, he wondered whether that was even possible.

What I didn't tell Lucas was that I also sent a few messages to Shadow, asking him how he's doing. Sonic sweatdropped as he pondered about the ebony hedgehog's reactions to his messages, figuring that his rival was probably annoyed by them. At least he could see that he was reading them, so that was a good thing. I still don't think that's a good idea, leaving them alone without even knowing whether they'll be fine or not. Sonic hummed. Maybe I should pay them a little visit, just in case.

Grinding to a halt, he turned around on his heel and sped right towards the Kageura residence.

xXx

''…''

Touka was lying in her bed, having pulled the blanket over her head and staring at the wall, her back turned towards Shadow. The ebony hedgehog was sitting on the swivel chair, just staring at her in silence as he thought about how things have been like this the past three days. After he had warped both of them home, Touka went to the bathroom, closing it right behind her and didn't come out of it for hours. When she did, Shadow noted how she had washed off Sakamoto's blood, having thrown Tomoe's light blue dress into the trash, and how her eyes were dark and red, having clearly spent a good amount of time crying her heart out. She barely spoke as she walked into her room, her only words being:

''I don't want to talk to anyone. I want to be left alone.''

That was the last 'conversation' they had before Touka once again completely shut down emotionally, barely even acknowledging him.

Shadow felt an overwhelming sense of guilt while watching her like this, just wasting away, but there was nothing he could do. There were times when he wanted to talk to Touka, but what was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to comfort her? He knew what was on her mind, but at the same time, he felt like she was a complete stranger to him. This was not the Touka he knew; she wasn't the determined, mischievous and protective older sister who took comforted him when he was at his lowest, who was defiant to the point of going against anyone who had authority or control over them and making them listen to her. She was always so strong, something Shadow deeply admired, but now? Now she was broken, a former shell of herself.

Shadow blamed himself for this, even though he knew that this was not his fault whatsoever. He wished that he could've done more to protect her, to shield her from the unfortunate truth. They both wanted to learn more about their past and they dug to deep, eventually getting buried in it. And when he didn't feel guilt, he was overwhelmed by the sensation of rage, the same kind he felt when he woke up after years of believing his beloved sister had died at his hand. The voice in the back of his mind returned, convinced him to find someone, anyone, and take his anger out on them, to punish them for what they had done to Touka. The first person who came to his mind was Sakamoto… and that's when the voice turned cold and the memory of his death replayed in his mind over and over again, like a broken tape. Shadow felt not pity for the man after what he had done to them, but the sudden brutality of his death did make his stomach squirm.

Shadow's ears twitched at the sound of voices coming from downstairs. He glanced at the hatch, unable to make out anything specific with his sensitive hearing, but he was sure that there was someone else in the downstairs besides Kisaki. He glanced at Touka, who hadn't moved from her position, having refused to leave her room unless absolutely necessary. He wanted to be there for her, and yet he couldn't.

He felt like a failure.

Sighing, Shadow got up and opened the hatch, leaping down into the hallway and walking to the stairs, the voices becoming louder. He stopped in the middle of the stairs, where he wouldn't be seen by anyone but still hear the ongoing conversation in the living room. Just as he had assumed, one of the voices was Kisaki's, but the other…

Sonic. Shadow frowned harder, clenching his fist as he listened in.

''Thanks once again for letting me in, Kisaki,'' Sonic said as Kisaki brought him a coaster and a glass of orange juice. ''I guess Shadow and Touka are at home as well, right?''

''Yeah, they are,'' Kisaki replied, as she sat down on the couch, sighing heavily. ''Unfortunately, neither of them is in the mood to talk. Touka has basically locked herself up in her room and Shadow refuses to say anything. I only see him whenever he comes down to get food for Touka.'' She pressed her fingers against her temple. ''I don't know what is going on with the two. Just a few days ago, they were both fine, if a little brooding, but now…''

Kisaki trailed off, clearly deeply concerned by the whole situation. Sonic's ears were pinned back as he thought about whether he should tell her what he knew. He wasn't that familiar with the relationship Touka and Shadow had from Kisaki, aside from the fact that Kisaki was Touka's adoptive mother on paper only and Touka never considered her a parental figure. However, seeing just how worried Kisaki was about her adoptive daughter, he decided that it would be the right thing to say something.

''I've heard that the two had been through a really traumatizing event. I don't know the details, though,'' Sonic responded. It wasn't a complete lie – he really didn't know all the details besides what Rouge had told them about witnessing Sakamoto's death, but he figured that Kisaki was better off without knowing that part. He reached for the orange juice, taking a sip out of the glass.

''I see… Thanks for telling me,'' Kisaki muttered, noting how Sonic was glancing at the stairs after putting the glass back on the coaster and fidgeting anxiously. ''If you want to talk to them, you can try, but I doubt you'll suceed.''

''I know you said that Touka and Shadow refuse to talk to you, but I'm persistent. Maybe I could get them…'' Sonic trailed off when Kisaki shook her head.

''It's not just that,'' she said, taking a deep breath. ''Listen, I know Touka and Shadow for a long time now, and when it comes to Touka, her being this closed off is not normal. I have never seen her behave like this, and I fear that, whatever had happened, it may have broken her mind. However, before you even get to talk to her, you would have to deal with Shadow.''

''Don't worry, I already know how to handle him,'' Sonic replied confidently, only to be met with Kisaki shaking her head again.

''I'm sure that you're well aware of just how protective Shadow is of Touka,'' Kisaki started, with Sonic nodding, having witnessed it first-hand. ''This kind of loyalty runs quite deep, and when put in the right mindset, Shadow will refuse to listen to anyone but Touka. This is one of those situations.'' Kisaki glanced at the stairs. ''I had tried to go to talk to Touka, but Shadow refuses to let me inside the room. He had told me that Touka wants to be left alone, and he's enforcing her will with an iron fist. So, unless you want to get caught up in a fight, I doubt you'll get through any of them.''

''So, Touka willingly put herself into isolation and Shadow's supporting her decision,'' Sonic voiced his thoughts, a little astounded. He knew that these two weren't particularly social, but he felt that this was going too far. He then gave Kisaki a confident grin. ''Well, I'm not afraid to get into a fight if necessary. I already know how Shadow is like.''

''There is one more thing I need to tell you,'' Kisaki added, feeling a tiny spark of hope when she saw just how confident Sonic was. She had to wonder if the blue hedgehog would be able to get drag the two out of their self-imposed isolation. ''I don't think Shadow wants this either.''

''You mean, isolating himself and Touka?'' Sonic asked, giving her a curious look. Kisaki nodded.

''Shadow may not be someone who is open with his emotions, but I could tell that he's frustrated with the whole situation and himself, and he doesn't know how to fix it. He knows Touka is hurt and he's doing everything in his power to prevent anyone from hurting her further, even if it means to keep her isolated.''

''That's even more reason for me to confront him,'' Sonic responded, grinning confidently. ''Just leave it all to me. I'm sure I'll be able to fix this.''

Shadow, who was listening to this, scowled, and walked back upstairs into his and Touka's bedroom, not wanting to listen to anything anymore. To his surprise, he saw Touka on her feet, all dressed up. She still had that solemn look on her expression, but she wasn't anymore hiding under the bedcovers.

''Touka, are you-?''

''I wanted to go outside. Are you coming with me?'' Touka asked, extending her arm. Shadow nodded, taking it and he could feel through his glove that her hand was cold and clammy. She was clearly not feeling well, but he figured that this was still better than nothing. There was a flash of blue light, and a moment later, they vanished.

A few minutes passed, with Sonic opening the hatch to the room, surprised to see that it was empty. ''Hey, they're gone!''

''What? But, we didn't see them leave!'' Kisaki shouted back from downstairs. Sonic ran up to her.

''They probably warped away. Don't worry, I'll find them and talk some sense into them,'' he said. Kisaki just put her hand over her mouth, supporting her elbow with her other hand as the hedgehog dashed off, hoping that he was right.

[...]

''I… I wasn't supposed to be like this…'' she said, shaking. ''I'm… I don't deserve any of this. I-I stole another person's life. I'm living a lie.'' Touka bit her lip, feeling as if someone was outright choking her. She couldn't breathe. ''I… Sometimes, I wish I was never created at all.''

Shadow felt like he was thrown into icy cold water, any breath he had vanishing and his eyes wide as he stared at his older sister. He knew that the situation was bad, but he had no idea it was this grim.

''Touka, don't say things like that!'' he suddenly shouted at her, only to immediately regret it.

''Shadow, please, just leave…'' Touka turned to him, her tone suddenly firm. Her eyes were still hazy from the tears, but there was an unmistakable look of determination in them. ''I don't want you to be around me anymore,… for your sake. You've done enough for me. More than enough.''

Shadow stared at her silently, unable to come up with a response. He wanted to respect her wish, but at the same time, he feared what would happened if he did. Sighing, Shadow got up and stepped in front of Touka.

''If I leave now and return later, will you still be here?'' he asked, his ruby eyes narrowing as he stared straight at her. Touka didn't respond. ''Touka, promise me that you will be here when I return.''

''Shadow, I…''

''Promise!''

Touka was caught off guard when Shadow suddenly snapped at her, staring at him for a moment, before slowly nodding.

''I promise,'' she whispered. Shadow just nodded in response and turned around, walking away. He hated the idea of leaving her alone, but if that was what she wanted, he wanted to respect it. He knew that while he was away, he'd be clutching onto this promise with his dear life, his only hope that Touka wouldn't do something to endanger herself.

Besides, he still had something else he needed to take care of. He walked onto the street and, just as he predicted, saw a blue streak of light zooming towards him. Sonic was relieved to have found Shadow, having searched the whole city for him and Touka.

''Hey, Shads, I was just-!''

POW!

Before Sonic could even finish his sentence, he was sent flying by Shadow, who punched him straight in the face. Sonic landed on the ground, shaking his head and rubbing his cheek, which was burning to the touch. He stared at Shadow, who was glaring daggers at him as he approached him, hands balled into fists, baring his fangs, completely livid.

''What makes you think that you have the right to stick your nose into my personal matters?!''

Shadow took another step as Sonic quickly got up. ''Shads, I know that you're angry, but I just want to help you.''

''I don't want your help!''

Shadow grabbed Sonic by his neck, lifting him up as they vanished in a flash of blue light. Sonic then felt a sharp pain in his back as Shadow slammed him against a wall. He realized that the wall was actually the underpass where they had one of their previous battles, not too far from the park they were previously at.

''I have enough of your self-righteousness! Only because you get to play hero, you think you can now be everyone's savior!'' Shadow growled furiously. ''Let me make something clear, Sonic! You can't fix everything! You can't fix me and you can't fix Touka! So stop trying!''

Shadow suddenly stumbled back as Sonic managed to kick him in the stomach, forcing him to let go of his rival. Sonic rubbed his neck, taking a deep breath. ''Okay, I get it. You're frustrated that things are falling apart. I understand. However, if you just talked to me about what happened, then…''

''There is nothing to talk about,'' Shadow cut him off, his tone harsh and cold. He was done with Sonic's antics. Sonic, on the other hand, sighed.

''Okay, then. I guess we'll have to do it the hard way,'' he said, stretching his arms above his head before getting into a battle stance and smirking. ''You know, I was actually looking forward to this, Faker.''

''I'll make you regret ever approaching me in the first place,'' Shadow responded.

The two hedgehogs then rushed forward into another clash.

[...]

Sonic dodged a punch from Shadow, which was followed by another punch, then a kick. Sonic just kept up avoiding the blows until he could find a good opening, but Shadow was relentless. Sure, Sonic fought him before a couple of times, but he had never seen him this furious. Although, he'd take furious Shadow over Shadow who had nothing left to fight for any day. Sonic briefly glanced back, noting the wall behind him, and he managed to dodge another sweeping kick to his head, stepping back and using the wall to bounce and tackle Shadow to the ground, trying to pin him down.

''Do you have enough?'' Sonic asked, grinning as he pressed Shadow's shoulders down. Shadow's response was to kick him with his knee, leaving Sonic reeling from the pain and then punching him again in the chest.

''Hmph, I've seen better from you,'' Shadow responded, staring at Sonic coldly as the latter recovered from the hit.

''Yeah… You did,'' Sonic responded, suddenly dashing forward.

Shadow braced himself for an attack, but Sonic zoomed past him, circling around him in a zig-zag manner to confuse him. Shadow kept calm, though, having understood what Sonic was planning to do, and when Sonic vanished from his sight, Shadow turned around, expecting a sneak attack from behind. However, instead, Sonic performed a homing attack from above, hitting Shadow and knocking him down. Sonic leapt back with a smirk on his expression as Shadow slowly got back up, knowing well his rival wouldn't just go down from one attack.

Admittedly, Sonic's plan wasn't to defeat Shadow. He just wanted the latter to vent his aggression through a battle and calm down so they could have a proper conversation. It was a simple stalling tactic, at least on paper, but Shadow was everything but simple. Sonic just hoped that he'd have enough stamina for this battle.

''Chaos Spear!''

''Yikes!'' Sonic managed to side-step the energy spear, letting it fly past him, feeling a little alarmed. If Shadow was willing to use his Chaos Powers, then things just got more complicated.

Another Chaos Spear formed in Shadow's hands, but instead of throwing it, Shadow used more like a weapon, swiping at Sonic. The cobalt hedgehog curled up, doing a spin attack at Shadow, who used the Chaos Spear to block the latter, energy sparking all around them. As the Chaos Spear dissipated, Sonic bounced back, uncurling, with a faint scent of burnt fur filling his nostrils. Before he could do anything about it, Shadow suddenly charged it for another punch, but to both of their surprise, Sonic blocked this one by grabbing Shadow's arm.

''You know, if you already want to fight me, then at least we can also talk!'' Sonic told him, sweep kicking Shadow, who leapt back, dodging the attack.

''There is nothing to talk about!'' Shadow growled. However, Sonic persisted, avoiding another punch and kicking Shadow in the chest.

''I understand that you're angry at me. I probably shouldn't have sent you so many messages either…''

''You spammed me 50 messages per day!''

POW!

Shadow managed to punch Sonic in the face, sending him flying. Sonic landed on the ground, shaking his head. ''Ughhh… I guess I deserved that one.'' He quickly got up, having to use his super speed to dodge another punch form Shadow as the latter warped right in front of him. ''However, I still think you should've just gone out and talked to someone than isolating yourself!''

''I don't want your advice!''

Sonic rushed down the street, forced to dodge Shadow's attempts at punching and kicking him as he warped around him. He saw a street lamp, rushed towards it and used it to circle around, kicking Shadow right in the gut as he warped in front of Sonic. Shadow fell on one knee, glaring at his rival as he clutched his stomach.

''I'm not saying that you have to take my advice. I just want to understand what is going through your head. I know that you're traumatized-'' Sonic replied when, suddenly, Shadow tackled him, warping both right back to the underpass and pinning Sonic below him.

''What do you know about trauma?!'' Shadow snarled furiously, glaring daggers at Sonic. ''What do you know about losing the most important person in your life?! What do you know how it feels when the whole world is against you?!''

''I… don't…'' Sonic responded in a defeated tone. Shadow stared at him, still angry, but noticeably calmer after hearing Sonic's response. He furrowed a brow when Sonic then looked back at him with a determined gaze. ''However, I know that you're feeling really lonely, as if everyone had abandoned you, and that you're carrying a huge responsibility on your shoulders. I want you to help with that burden, because I understand that feeling of loneliness. I told you before, and I'm telling you now, even if this is the path you have chosen, I won't give up. I will continue to fight for my friends, for Neos City, and especially for you, Shadow. So, stop being so stubborn!''

To Shadow's surprise, Sonic managed to kick him off him, causing him to stumble backwards, with Sonic getting ip on his feet. He expected Shadow to attack him again, but instead, the latter just stared at him with a steely gaze.

''Why?'' Shadow asked, suddenly walking towards Sonic, who quickly stepped back, feeling a little nervous, only to feel the wall behind him once again, with Shadow slamming his palm next to Sonic's head, keeping Sonic pinned against the wall once again. Shadow stepped even closer, with Sonic catching a faint scent of lavender coming from him. ''Why are you so determined to be so close to me?''

''Because I think you're an interesting person and I like hanging out with you. It's simple as that,'' Sonic responded in a chipper tone, giving Shadow a smug grin. Shadow's expression fell, avoiding eye-contact with Sonic.

''Right… It's simple as that,'' Shadow muttered, stepping back, his ears drooping as he stared at the ground, fists clenched. Sonic exhaled, feeling relieved that Shadow had finally calmed down. Shadow then looked back, his glare sending shivers down Sonic's spine, making him wonder if Shadow found another reason to be angry at him. ''You're still insisting on that, despite me showing no interest in being your friend like the others do. I agreed to being your ally and rival, but nothing beyond that.''

''Well, regardless of what you think, I still consider you my friend,'' Sonic replied happily, much to Shadow's chagrin. ''So, what happened to you and Touka? If you don't want to talk about it, could you at least give me a hint or something?'' Sonic noted the glare Shadow shoot at him, his ears drooping. ''Okay, I know I'm not really the best person when it comes to talking things out, especially emotional stuff. Amy's way better at this, so if you're more comfortable with that, we could go to talk to her. Or if you prefer a more blunt approach over a compassionate one, we could also talk to Minami.''

Shadow remained silent, giving Sonic a steely gaze, then lowered his head, staring somberly at the ground, arms folded across his chest. He closed his eyes when he felt a hand on his shoulder, followed by a surprisingly gentle tone coming from Sonic, ''Shads, I'm serious. You're not alone. If you still believe that, then I'll be always here to remind you that you have a friend by your side.''

''You're really a thorn in my side,'' Shadow responded, with Sonic feeling a little concerned, only to see Shadow's expression change to a more vulnerable one. He sighed, showing a pained look as he continued, ''I-I feel like I'm losing Touka again.''

''Shadow…''

''What we learned at that place, the truth… It completely broke her. I never saw her like this before; it's like she has turned into an empty shell of the person she used to be,'' Shadow explained, his hands falling by his side and clenched his fist, shaking. ''I hate seeing her like this and it frustrates me that there is absolutely nothing I can do to help her. I want to protect her, but how do you protect someone who is hurting themselves? I feel like a failure.''

''Shadow, I don't think you have failed,'' Sonic said, stepping up, with Shadow giving him a look of genuine surprise, only for it to change to a frown when Sonic placed his arm around his shoulder. ''I see this as a setback. Yeah, things were going great before, but you tripped and now you don't know how to continue. All you can do now is get up and keep going.''

''I'll consider your advice… Would you take your arm off my shoulder?'' Shadow growled.

''Sorry,'' Sonic quickly stepped back, grinning sheepishly. ''Also, next time you feel like venting your frustrations through a battle, just ask. I'm always up for a sparring match.''

''I'll keep that in mind,'' Shadow responded. Sonic just smiled at him happily, with Shadow still feeling a little irked by his positive outlook, but at the same time, the weight he felt on his shoulders wasn't as heavy as before. He was too used to act and fight on his own, with only Touka by his side, and he felt like there wasn't anyone beside her he could trust. Sure, there was also Kisaki, who would watch over them, but even then, they would exclude her from many things. During their life at the Codex Research Facility, they had developed an ''us against the world'' mentality and it was hard to shake it off. He hated the fact that he had just cracked under the pressure, but at the same time, he knew that he had to accept outside help to find a solution to this problem. It was quite frustrating for him, but at the same time, he felt a sense of relief.

''Now, let's go pick up Touka and…'' Sonic was about to walk away when, suddenly, a bunch of crystals shoot out of the ground, stopping him in his tracks. ''Whoa- What was that?!''

Both suddenly heard a cold chuckle coming from somewhere above. They ran out of the underpass, spotting a shadow-like figure hovering on the top of it. Shadow frowned, growling, ''Mephiles!''

''It was quite amusing watching you fight and struggle, but having you heal from your emotional trauma is certainly not part of the plan,'' Mephiles told him. Sonic glanced at Shadow, then back at Mephiles, realizing that this was the ARNav Rouge had told them about.

''Dude, what are you talking about?'' Sonic asked the Dark, while Shadow understood immediately.

''You didn't bring us to that place just to meet Prof. Sakamoto. His death was planned from the start,'' he said, with Sonic giving him a confused look. Mephiles gazed at him, at first not answering to his accusation, but then relented.

''I see that you put quite some thought into what had happened,'' Mephiles started. ''You're correct in your assumption though. The reason Toshiro and I brought you to meet Prof. Sakamoto is because we hoped that you would eventually succumb to your prior programming as a weapon after learning the truth and go on a rampage. The additional trauma you and Touka had experienced was just the cherry on the top and I sincerely enjoyed seeing you at your lowest. Touka's breakdown was especially amusing. Is it true that she has actually become suicidal?''

''You-'' Shadow gritted his teeth, baring his fangs. ''You'll pay for what you've done to Touka!''

''Hmph, I'd like to see you try!'' Mephiles rose up his arm, with flames suddenly bursting from the crystals that had sprouted from the ground, going right after Shadow. Sonic quickly tackled his rival, getting both of them away from the fire.

''This guy looks like real trouble,'' Sonic said, with Shadow glancing at him, noting the determined look on Sonic's expression. Sonic winked confidently, ''How about we take him down together?''

''How about we make it a competition and see who gets the most hits?'' Shadow responded, with Sonic grinning widely, looking excited.

''Now you're talking!''

Both nodded and then turned towards Mephiles, who just frowned in return. This was not the kind of reaction he wanted to see.

[...]

Both Sonic and Shadow dodged a wall of flames Mephiles sent towards them. Sonic then used his super speed to rush towards the Dark, only to be surprised by a barrage of sharp crystals growing out of the ground. Fortunately for him, Shadow fired a Chaos Spear, shattering the crystals and clearing the path for Sonic, who launched into a spin attack towards Mephiles. However, instead of hitting the Dark, he spun right into the flames that Mephiles had conjured.

''Sonic!'' Shadow shouted as he saw a ball of fire emerge from the flames, spinning and hitting a nearby wall. He uncurled, clearly dazed and singed. Shadow then turned to Mephiles, who fired a whirl of flames towards him. Shadow warped around them, about to punch Mephiles, only to pass through him, with the shadow-like copy disappearing and Mephiles appearing right behind him.

''You're so predictable,'' Mephiles hissed, with Shadow turning around in an attempt to roundhouse kick him in one swift motion, but the Dark already merged with the hedgehog's shadow, avoiding the attack. Shadow looked down, only to for crystals to sprout from the ground, enveloping the dark hedgehog completely.

''Shadow!'' Sonic screamed, holding onto his hurt arm, his eyes wide as he saw the ghastly crystallic structure with Shadow in the middle of it, trapped. Mephiles emerged from the shadows on the ground, looking at his little masterpiece in interest.

''I expected you to put more of a fight,'' he said. ''But, I suppose I should've expected this from someone so weak-minded and easy to manipulate.'' Mephiles then turned to Sonic, who tried to ignore the pain in his arm and took a battle stance. ''I suggest you to back down unless you want to end up the same as this idiot. My business is with Shadow.'' Mephiles' gaze then changed for a moment. ''Although, I wouldn't mind taking you down as well.''

''I know that you hurt Shadow and Touka, and I will make sure that you- huh?'' Sonic cut himself off as he saw a glowing red light behind Mephiles. The Dark too turned around, realizing that the red glow was coming from Shadow, his whole body enveloped in crimson light.

''Chaos BLAST!''

The crystallic prison exploded due to the blast of red energy, with Shadow falling down on his knee, breathing heavily, the glow in his eyes fading. Unfortunately, he had to use up a lot of energy just to free himself from Mephiles' trap and he was winded from the attack. Still, he got up, glaring at his opponent. Mephiles' eyes narrowed as he stared back. He had to admit, Shadow was stubborn. Nevertheless, he was the one standing on the top. The so-called Ultimate Lifeform and his equal were clearly unable to make a scratch on him.

''I had fun playing, but-'' Before Mephiles could even end his sentence, he suddenly felt something wrap around his chest, pulling him backwards. A string? Before he could even respond in any way, whoever was holding onto the string swung him into the wall of the underpass, causing him to hit it hard and fall over.

''You're being really mean.''

''Big?!'' Sonic and Shadow's eyes widened in complete surprise when Big emerged, holding a fishing pole, with Froggy on his shoulder. He was glaring at Mephiles, who cut through the string with his claws and glared back at Big. Rest assured, he clearly didn't expect for him to appear in join the fight.

''Why you-?!'' Mephiles felt a sense of rage overwhelming him. He made it clear that no one was going to even put a scratch on him and if this purple cat wanted to participate in this battle, he would make him pay. However, before he could do that, Shadow suddenly rushed forwards, using the moment of distraction to launch an attack at Mephiles. Unfortunately for him, Mephiles turned back, creating once again a wall of fire to stopped Shadow in his tracks. ''Tch, you can't defeat me!''

''Leave my brother alone!''

Too distracted by what was going on in front of him, Mephiles didn't even register Touka sneaking up behind him, holding a pipe in her hand and whacking him over the head with it. She glared at him as he fell over, seething with rage. Shadow was shocked to see her here, only to get elbowed by Sonic.

''Hey, Shads, remind me to never make Touka angry,'' he said, a soft grin on his lips. Shadow couldn't help but grin in response, as this was the Touka he was familiar with. The teenager dropped the pipe and then ran past Mephiles and towards the hedgehogs, Big and Froggy.

''Are you guys okay?'' she asked, a look of concern on her expression.

''It's nothing that we can't walk off,'' Sonic responded in a casual tone. Shadow gave her a worried look.

''What about you?'' he asked. Touka shook her head, responding with a look of guilt.

''I'm so sorry for making you all worried about me,'' she replied. Shadow was about to respond, but Sonic interrupted the two.

''You know, we can talk about this once we're done with Mephiles,'' he said, pointing at the Dark, who got up. Despite the glare he shoot at them, there was clearly a slight hint of alarm in his gaze, especially since Touka was clearly more than willing to aid the group in the battle rather than be consumed by her depression and trauma. Shadow noticed that, stepping out.

''Care to prove your status as The Ultimate Weapon against the Chaos Surge-boosted Ultimate Lifeform?'' he asked. Mephiles frowned, backing away into the shadows. He knew that without Toshiro's aid, he would have a hard time against Shadow powered up by Chaos Surge.

''This won't be the last time we see each other!''

The group watched him disappear, before collectively sighing in relief. Sonic then put his arms behind his head, adding in a causal tone, ''Well, that was fun.'' He smiled sheepishly when he saw the exasperated look Shadow gave him, turning towards Big and Froggy. ''Thanks for the help, guys!''

''You're welcome,'' Big responded happily, glancing at Touka, who had a smile on her lips, despite her clear look of discomfort.

''I… I suppose there's a lot to explain,'' she started. Shadow raised an eyebrow, surprised to see that she was actually willing to come clean about what had happened, with Touka catching on his non-verbal question. ''I had talked to Big, and I think it would be a good idea for the rest of Team Neos to learn the truth.''

''Are you sure?'' Shadow questioned her. Touka gave a firm nod, with Sonic and Shadow exchanging glances. While Shadow was still uncertain, Sonic just gave him an encouraging grin and a thumbs up.

''I'll call Lucas and the rest of the team, then.''

[...]

''You're already familiar with Mephiles, right? He also has a partner named Toshiro Miwa, and just like Touka, Toshiro is an artificial creation, albeit for a different purpose,'' Shadow explained.

''They're the ones who will destroy the future,'' Silver said in a grim tone, drawing everyone's attention as he approached Shadow. ''The kind of fire powers Mephiles has is identical to that of Ignis Infernalis, and considering how I was sent from the future to the exact moment of the past from which the fire originates, I'm certain that it's him who will be the catalyst for this disaster.''

''Then we will stop at nothing to make sure to prevent that,'' Shadow said in a firm tone. He and Silver were suddenly startled by a blue blur, with Sonic appearing right between them, placing his arms over their shoulders and pulling them closer.

''Shadow's right! Be it past, present or future, nothing can stop us from making the world a better place!'' Sonic said cheerfully, with Silver smiling back at him, while Shadow shoot him a glare, clearly still not liking the idea of being touched.

Links:

#Sonadow Moments in Sonic Cyber Revolution (The Enter The E.G.G.M.A.N. Arc & The Babylon Rogues Arc)

#Sonadow Moments in Sonic Cyber Revolution (The Starfall Arc)

#Sonic Cyber Revolution (Masterlist)

#Sonic Cyber Revolution #Sonic Cyber Revolution Analyzer #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #sonadow

[bijoumikhawal]

"Biden is the best choice and he's actually really empathetic and reasonable but also you can't wait for a candidate that won't do genocide and war crimes because to become a presidential candidate you have to be willing to do that" see what you fundamentally don't understand is I'm not waiting for a candidate that won't do war crimes, because I know that. I cannot morally stomach this system, it's a joke to claim its democratic, and AMERICA DELENDA EST. this country is a plague on this Earth

#cipher talk #It's baffling because okay so you know how fucked up this is but you're behaving in a way that clearly indicates you want that this shambli #Disgusting empire to cling to life until after you're dead because it'd make /you/ uncomfortable and inconvenienced #To live through its destruction (the wealthier classes and more privileged experience lesser material changes in state collapse so long as #They aren't too highly ranked/involved in politics. A Sri Lankan wrote an article specifically addressing Americans about this) #It's so dehumanizing! People's blood is so cheap to you! You've just accepted its inevitable that genocide will happen! #Because of how the US operates! You can see no other future! It hardly matters to you! #You say this like the death of Palestinians of Yemenis of Syrians is someone else's dropped ice cream cone #You understand why people hate this country and you understand we deserve it but it just. Hardly matters to you #It feels like madness to watch this. It's disgusting #I keep thinking- it'd be so easy for you to justify my people being killed if violence broke out and it was in your favor #It's unlikely because. Well. America loves 'the church of the martyrs' #But you'd do it if that was favorable. You wouldn't think twice. You might feel a twinge in your heart but that's all #Because we aren't people to you! #We aren't all that important! Not important enough for you do anything more than 'well let's vote a blue in and do some protests' #What's a protest worth if you perpetuate the system and can't see a way out and don't try for a way out? #That's killing a man then putting flowers on his casket. It's /perverse/. #You get used to the idea that Africans die that West Asians die and that's just the way of the world. My g-d do you understand anything?? #I watch necrosis take hold my parts of my culture and I watch every good person I know be ground to dust under a military regime #I talk to my friend who got drafted and is trans and may never come out because if they do they can get arrested as a 'prostitute' #I watch the wild hope for the future I was introduced to over radio at 9 years old wither #I watch people risk it anyway because just past the fence they can see they know there are people there #I watch my neighbor to the south crumble and weep because our hands are bloody and it's in part because we bloodied them for the west #And you just think that's how things are. #Fascist white death cult mindset

[sskk-manifesto]

Osamu Dazai and the Depressing Era

#I have so many thoughts through my mind these days I was barely able to focus on the episode. I kept zoning out #I made barely any post #Okay some thoughts. The thing that really hit me since the first time watching b/sd... Is the– #“I don't kill people because I want to write about lives” “I start doing good because my friend asked me to” #Like I get grey morals and everything but also. Sorry for being so simplistic but I think everyone should do good / not kill people– #because killing people is bad lol. No because of other personal reasons #I really *really* feel b/sd ultimately has a very nihilistic approach to life. #And that when Oda said “You won't find a reason to live whether side you're on. Both sides are the same.” it's not Oda-character talking– #but it's really the author expressing their own worldview through the one character that's the most distinguished #They really think there's no difference between good and bad in their little nihilistic world. #Which is something I personally don't agree with. #“It is a given that everything that is worth wanting will be lost the moment I obtain it” #......... No it's not you just need to go to the shore and listen to the waves crush and the seagulls squeal dude. It's going to be okay. #That's why it's so easy to portray Dazai as perfect and flawless for the author btw. #Because nothing he ever did in the pm was wrong if “good” and “bad” don't mean anything to begin with. #And this is coming from a deeply relativist person. But I believe even grey morals have a limit. #Thus my general disagreement with most b/sd themes #I don't know why I went off this tangent btw I didn't intend to. #I suppose it bears repeating once in a while where I stand compared to the b/sd themes and my personal interpretation of them #(Even though I acknowledge most people don't agree with such interpretation... ) #There were other things regarding the episode I needed to say but I forgot... #One of them was that season 2 Dark Era proves that even amv openings can actually be good if you put enough budget in them #Which makes me even more pissed at the season 3 / season 5 ops #random rambles

[odetolovers]

hello 💃

#hi hi i am never on here anymore tumblr my tumblr i miss you #tbf it’s because my life has been so crazy busy #i am no longer unemployed and am in fact in the career i wanted. YAY! #also i love my girlfriend and my cats and my life and healing and growth #and also…self worth question mark #something i have historically struggled with but am now getting less mentally ill about #HALLELUJAH! #i can never quite wrap my head around how lucky i am #and how fulfilled i am #this much happiness feels like it shouldnt be real but. i am actually deeply known and loved through my worst moments and my best and it’s #the most healing thing i’ve ever experienced #shoutout to my girlfriend (sooner rather than later wife) for being just. the most perfect person for me and the best person ive ever met #she’s my best friend fr #eek. life is good and love is good and we both have colds that are going to last through christmas but i know it will still be the best #christmas of my life because it’s with them #life is looking up :) #craziest concept to a very traumatised girlie is that life can actually be good and happy but im slowly learning to trust it #<3 #valentina talks

[avatardoggo]

when you meet a Guy and he is 99.9% perfection but the Holy Spirit says no

#i don’t like like guys often (my last crush was high school) so when i do i just 😳 get a lil fluttered #soo when i met this guy the first time i was like o he’s cute and sweet and just easy to talk to and i was like if i allowed myself j could #let myself like him but then i didn’t see him for a while kinda forgot about him one of my friends is close with him so id see him on his i #story a lot this summer and it was like oh ya he’s cute whatever #but last saturday i saw his at this lil party and omgoodness he’s so cute in person #and GUYS!! MUTUALS MY BELOVED 😭🥹🫠🤭😫 HE TAUGHT ME HKW TO PLAY POOL AND HE WAS TOUCHING MY HAND AKSKDKJDKDKFKFJJFJFF #and there was a lot of casual touching and stuff omgoodness and he was buying everyone soda and stuff and he smelt sooo good #and tHEN AT THE END OF THE NIGHT I GAVE HIM MY SNAP #but then i was praying when i got home before bed and was talking to the Holy Spirit and He was like you could have a relationship w/ this #person and everything would be great physically and emotionally but you will suffer spirtiually and then i started thinking about the progr #ss i've made this summer w/ my relationship w/ God and ya it's definitely not worth it i wouldn't trade Jesus for anything or one #soo now i have to kill the streak i have with him on snap bc it's just not wise to be talking back and forth yk? and if God says so i gotta #do it #ig it's hard cause it's nice being liked liking someone who likes you but God knows better than me soooooo pay ya girl listens and has #and i was talking to my friend who knows him better than me and she was like ya he's such a sweet kind funny guy but he doesn't have a rela #ionship w/ God as far as she knows sooo #the strength to withstand 😭 #vk overshares in the tags

[bangcakes]

.

#ok i said i was goin to bed but lmao a few things. or maybe just 1 #me this year compared to last year? what an astronomical difference #i think i really.... came into my own. like thats the saying right #i think im at the best ive ever been. and like..... honestly i never thought id be able to make friends again but lmao i made so many at #school and like it took awhile #and like i also Know im Different n Confident bc not only am i into someone irl.... i legit like..... purposefully got to know him #like usually i stay the fuck away. but like idk a switch happened. and im like ok but why NOT me???? like im cute.... im fun... all that #like !!!!! idk !!!! why not????? #so ya........... JDJDJDJDJJD maybe this doesnt seem like much but to me its a Huge Deal JDJDJJDMDMDMDMS #n i hope the trend continues this way !!!! #like heck i even talk so casually to the profs. like lmao who am i JDJDJDJDJDJD #i am worried tho.... that when i transition back to working in jan (lmao lets be real... probs wont get a job til after then).... that i'll #go back to being Closed Off #its just really hard for me to open up.... but idk i think this year has taught me that like..... it's worth it.... #and ya.... hoping i can continue this !!!!! #personal

[lemongogo]

a random OC ask for you (for zaihala): what is your OC's favorite memory?

also: if they were dropped in a random city for a day with a pouch full of gold/relevant currency and no obligations whatsoever, what would they be doing?

aah omg this is so sweet ehehe, thank you for the qs :3c

i like to imagine that zaihala is an avid stonemason and mosaicist .. i think she is enraptured by the idea of taking something so resilient in nature and molding it under the guide of mallet and chisel . she's a humanist intrigued by the natural world, by geology.. by the incredible craftsmanship that goes into such a trade .

if she were to be dropped into some random city with the freedom of both time and money, i think you could find her in the market , sourcing materials or tesserae she couldnt otherwise acquire at her local workshop. . glass, shells, ceramics etc from vendors or acquainting herself with quarry tradesmen in order 2 procure the stone that best fits her vision.its an obsession..u literally have to pull her away or she'll be there all day

as for her FAVORITE MEMORY!!! omg.. i keep picturing her as this fresh face in baldurs gate, having just moved there on her own , sworn to independence but feeling like maybee she made a mistake. . maybe she was too impulsive, chasing her desire to pursue stonework on a whim, not having thought abt the consequences or the finances or what have u .. but she takes the chance to meet up with some local artists on an outing just outside the city .and its just sooo .. reaffirming to her in that moment. to be surrounded by people who are drunk on wine & laughter and to see the sprawling city just before her as the sun is setting..and the wind is warm..gentle...and it leaves her feeling so content..like a feeling of peace that swells up within her and lets her know tht she made the right choice. that it will be OKAYYU!!!!!!!!!! i think that's gotta be in one of her top ten.. perhaps.

#hmm.i just rly love her. #she wld def haave one of those like. dude idk anything abt stones or gems or literally anything that i talked ab here #but she would have those like.gem inspection kits :sob: like smone tries to bullshit her on the quality or identity of smth #and shes like the nerd emoji as she pulls out thse sujper magnifying glassses or watevr and the forceps and shes like. #YKWIMM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH #also i just love the idea of her being sooo independent. not from the get go but as a sort of character evolution #and not independent in a deleterious 'i dont need anyone' way but as someone who knows themselves in&out.comfortably. #bc i always make ocs that r soo.. insistent on deriving worth from their interaction w others.how are they perceived 'are they liked 'so on #but for her..i rly want 2 make someone who is self assured in their own abilities & worth.she knows what shes capable of ! #doesnt need outside validation or outside influence to choose/act on her behalf. #shes a big community / friends / family person when it comes to like.social support . #very fun. shes a paladin for me.loveee divine smite.. love radiance #ik i modeled my one off k n y oc on berninis ecstasy of st teresa but sry its zaihalas now.those gold rays of light.LITERALLY HER COREEE #zaihala #ocs #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #asktag #inaconstantstateofchange

[t4tdanvis]

went from having an ok day to having a terrible day this is awesome guys wow

#❄.txt #got so panicked from seeing my biggest trigger that i left a server and now im scared to rejoin #do i really want to be in that server? no not really i dont like several of the people there and every single time ive tried to talk there #its gone wrong and i just ended up muting the server and not talking there at all because it made me insanely uncomfortable #'theseus then why the fuck do u wanna rejoin' bc one of my friends + someone i wish i had the confidence to befriend are in there and i #wanna be able to talk to them #'well were u actually talking in there' hell no i felt Terrified of that server #is being in that server worth it just to talk to this one person more?? hell if i know #currently i think it is but also i think im having a panic attack?? i feel Sick and my hands are Shaking #it also feels like im kinda in Shock currently which cant be good but yknow what do i nose /ref #if i had the confidence to just actually talk to the person i wanna talk to then none of this wouldve happened. unfortunately i am a Coward #also if discord allowed me to mute words like i can on tumblr. once again this wouldnt have happened #why was i cursed with Exomemories this is terrible #im also in another server with the person but it never talks there so do i just suck it up and rejoin the server i left?? #or what if i just exploded into a billion pieces and died forever i think that would work /j

[foolishnpd]

I wonder how much my lack of friends comes from my social anxiety, or the fact that I refuse to even bother talking to the people who show interest in me because I think they're inferior idiots that I don't want to associate or make friends with because I think they'd bore me~

#lilyroaring #actually npd #social anxiety #it's likely both tbh #the anxiety comes first in a more primal fear kind of way #and then the arrogance comes around once my head clears #I just think most people are really so boring #there's almost nobody worth being friends with #it takes so much energy for me to be friends with someone #and I'm not wasting it on those kinds of idiots #I try to put a lot of effort into my friendships. sometimes more than I should #and I don't wish to waste that effort on someone inferior #I'm grateful people are interested in talking to me #I really don't get it. if they're just being sociable #or if I just seem so interesting and mysterious that they wish to speak to me #I've had people telling me I'm 'such a kind person' after talking at me for five minutes #when I was just sitting there ignoring them ;_; #like yeah. you really are an idiot aren't you #you don't know me at all #don't think we're friends

[the-casbah-way]

i woke up too late to study (again) and it’s raining and i’m too depressed to go to uni so i have to cancel on all my friends today (again)

#i keep waking up really late on days where i don’t have class and i don’t know why #i suppose it’s because i’m debilitatingly depressed and the idea of being awake genuinely makes me want to vomit #i’m used to getting up at 7am for work and i never struggled with it but right now i just can’t do anything #and then i get more depressed and stressed and angry at myself because i’m not getting work done #i’m behind on all my deadlines and i’m trying so hard but nothing is happening because i’m too sad to function #i get this soul eating guilt and self hatred when i cancel on my friends #because i’m just the person who never follows through i always cancel and disappoint people and no one is surprised anymore #and i know i’ll be able to go to class tomorrow but i’m going to have to cancel on my friends for after that class too #because i’m too depressed to be around anyone i just want to be on my own and feel worse #i wish i could talk to someone about how bad i feel all the time but i’ve got a lifetime’s worth of feelings pent up and it’s too much #idk what to do with myself

[sylkana]

i've had one of my worst days in awhile and my friend says he's been distant from me lately bc he doesn't want to deal with my "attitude". cool. thanks. whatever

#like any human i can be a bitch yes but ive ?? been so good towards him the past few months ??? #i realized it wasnt worth opening up to him or trying to seek comfort bc hed just flip it on me somehow #and id have to apologize for whatever #it was tiring. so i just... dont talk #and i can be sarcastic and snarky but thats just... me?? as a person??? #98% of the time its not meant to be mean spirited???? #im so tired. so fucking tired. he goes on about being depressed and stressed out the past few months #NEWSFLASH. SO HAVE I. EVERYONE IS GOING THROUGH SHIT. YOURE NOT SPECIAL #that makes me sound really mean but jesus fuck. he doesnt stop to think maybe im having a bad day (which i was) #no he just automatically assumes im being a bitch #this is the same 'friend' who forced me to open up about something or he threatened to leave #while KNOWING i have trust and abandonment issues btw #im so fucking done. im not talking to him. if he wants to be a dick and not deal with me he can choke #im dealing with enough rn #sorry for rambling #kenzie.txt