#i'm feeling anxious and frustrated and I'm just not sure I trust that this is going to work out

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

New therapist appt was the other day and I've been chewing on it ever since.

There's something about the way therapists interact with my existing/suspected diagnoses that always feels really telling and like.

I could just read the "I think you self-sabotage all your relationships" pouring off this woman the entire hour.

I....don't.

I mean. A lot of people do, it's a really normal aspect of like. 60% of mental health issues.

But that's really never been my problem. My problem is that the relationships I have are extremely limited. I could count a lifetime's worth of emotionally intimate relationships on my fingers. I also have a lot of people in my life that I know and interact with positively and care about without being at all close to! But everyone else I basically never even got around to learning their names. My relationships are actually.....shockingly stable? Most of the people I'm close to I met before leaving my undergrad program (high school/college) and there's been very little change to my social circle since then.

So like. While I get the importance of helping with this when it happens (everyone deserves a stable support system!) it is genuinely pretty unhelpful to me specifically to be treated as if that is my primary symptom needing attention. Especially on the basis of an initial session where I'm basically just rattling off my on-paper history with some more detail than the intake forms had.

I actually know how to have healthy and positive relationships and the relationships that I have in my life at this time are ones that have BEEN that consistently for me for a decade or more. What I *do* need ongoing support for is the obsessions/compulsions I've been avoiding working on for the last 10 yrs because out of everything they were the least likely to end up killing me. I need someone to assess for the possibility of ADHD. I need someone who can help me retether when my grounding/embodiment gets loose. And yeah. CBT/DBT has been helpful for that. But largely because it allows me to cope with extreme amounts of psychological stress/distress when my survival systems collapse. Not because I'm at risk of blowing up my relationships during a trigger episode. What's most helpful to me is having someone who can keep up with my own systems analysis well enough to be a genuinely useful sounding board. CBT/DBT can be a really effective vessel for that, but I've also had therapists whose primary modality was just being an anthropologist at me in a clinical setting and she was the best therapist I've ever had.

I dunno. It's just frustrating when mental health care professionals are so.....functionally off track? Like if you are focusing, as a provider, on symptoms I don't present with, while dismissing symptoms I *do* it makes me feel super not-confident in your ability to provide me adequate care. And it's like my own practice as a provider makes it that much less tolerable when my own providers are being obtuse about shit. I do actually know what I need and what my care should look like. I've been doing this longer than you, unless you're already more than 20 yrs deep into your career, so maybe take a beat to assume competence before trying to diagnose me with something no provider from my past has EVER thought I fit while suggesting my existing diagnoses, that took time and work and thought to settle on, should be overturned. The most insulting part is her KNOWING we have the same job and educational background when she made these assertions. So like. It's not even like she has an excuse for talking down to me the way she did.

"Has anyone ever talked to you about the neurological impact of early childhood trauma?"

Well maam, if the therapist who diagnosed me and took me through EIGHT GODDAMN YEARS of therapy didn't manage to cover enough of that ground, I *did* also spend 3 yrs working in the child welfare system and then took courses towards a trauma specialty certification during my masters so YEAH. SOMEONE TOLD ME.

"Sometimes we see lots of unrelated diagnoses when really it's all trauma"

Yeah, and sometimes children are born with neurological/mental health needs that predate any opportunjty for trauma and even make them more vulnerable TO that trauma when it arrives. So like maybe consider that it doesn't have to be one or the other. Maybe the other diagnoses are unrelated because they're fucking unrelated.

I wish I could say I feel satisfied with the way I advocated for myself in that session but I don't, as evidenced by the fact that I'm still rehashing the conversation 72 hours later.

I just. I don't know how I went in saying I have an existing PTSD and recent OCD diagnosis but I want to assess for the possibility of ADHD because of conversations with my wife (ADHD) and my most recent therapist (qualified LICSW) and somehow leave being told she wants to change my diagnosis to borderline on the basis of a single conversation and an introductory psych history.

It also feels super irresponsible to me given the social stigma and diagnostic stigma around BPD. Like. I have diagnosed BPD before, and you know what path I pretty much always follow? Adjustment D/o for the first 6 months of care during which we do comprehensive assessment work and some long term stabilization. Once that's in place I reassess for BPD based on symptoms I have directly observed or had reported to me. I have never suggested BPD to someone on a first appt because personality disorders are notoriously fiddly to diagnose and it would be irresponsible to try to do so without either the presence of acute and explicit symptoms or long term treatment relationships. If you're going to give a client a diagnosis that is so stigmatized within our field you better be damn sure before you ever include it on their chart. Otherwise you are setting them up for serious maltreatment within the system. And if one of your early conversations isn't then about how your client can and should advocate for themselves within the system under their new diagnosis (and the ways you plan to support them in that) you can go fuck yourself.

So yeah. I'm feeling.....anxious. about my new therapist to say the least. I'm going to keep seeing her for now. The practice itself comes highly recommended and has all the psych services I need rolled into one practice so it would be exceedingly frustrating to have to leave and I don't want to get a bad reputation by therapist hopping within the practice either. So I need to stick it out a while and see if I can make this workable. At least until end of Feb. If I get there and it still isn't working out I can let her know I'd like to go back on the waitlist for another provider. But man. It fucking sucks that she already seems to have decided on a narrative before even talking symptom occurrence patterns with me.

#mental health is weird especially when you're a mental health care provider #i'm feeling anxious and frustrated and I'm just not sure I trust that this is going to work out #i'll manage but ughhhhhh

[fishsticksloser]

Can I request a good future Donnie x Reader where reader has like. Anxiety²? And is always hesitant to ask him for attention or affection when he is even slightly busy?

Silent Longing

f!Donnie x gn!reader

Warnings: anxiety, angst, kiss, communication *gasp*

A/N: Sorry I'm so inconsistent right now :((

Donnie is working in his lab. Like always. It was normal, the usual as you and his brothers would say. There was hardly a moment you didn't find him in his lab, working on gods know what.

On a normal day, you would go into his room and wait for him to be done with work. On a normal day, Donnie would come in, tug off his hoodie and lay with his head on your chest.

But today hadn't been a good day. You craved his touch and comfort, yet seeing him bent over his desk made you pause. You didn't like interrupting him, you felt anxious asking for affection knowing he wasn't one who really like it.

Yet you stand in the doorway.

You eventually pull up a spare chair and sit at his desk, somewhere out of the way. Donnie doesn't seem to notice you for a moment, engrossed in his work. Out of the corner of his eye, he does eventually see you.

"Darling," he smiles, rolling over to you. " What do I thank this visit on?"

"Thought I'd hang out with you for a while." You shrug, watching him tap his screwdriver on the desk.

"Just hang out?" His head cocks slightly, brows furrowed. He wasn't good with emotions, but he seemed to notice the underlying tension. "As you can see, I'm working to save the world, so... You being here means it must be bad."

"It's nothing, really. I just wanted to be with you..." You tell him, watching him roll his chair closer. "I'm distracting you, aren't I? I can just wait in your room."

Donnie frowns, watching you get up to make your escape. He stands up, gently grabbing your arm. "You're important too. I don't want you to feel neglected or unimportant." He tugs you to face him. "Please tell me. What is it you want to say?"

"You're busy. It's okay" You answer, one of his hands finding your wasit while the other cups your cheek. "It can wait."

"Are you sure about that?" He leans in, his voice dropping. "Tell me what you want, my love."

"You're busy. You have a lot of work to get done. I don't want to distract you."

"Yes, I have a lot of work to do, but that doesn't mean I can't make time for you. You're not a distraction. You're a priority." He sighs, leaning closer to rest his forehead against yours. "I can't bare the thought of you feeling neglected."

"I just... Had a bad day. It's fine. I can wait for you to be done."

Donnie's expression becomes more intense as he listens to your words, his grip on your waist tightening slightly. "Yes, I have work to do, but that doesn't mean I can't make time for you. You're not a distraction, love. You're a priority."

"You're busy......" You mumble again, still keeping a tight hold of his shirt because even though you knew he was busy, you didn't want him to leave. "I don't want to distract you... Or be selfish..."

Donnie's grip on your waist tightens, his voice filled with a mix of frustration and tenderness. "Enough with this selfless act, love. It's not selfish to want to be with the person you care about. And I care about you, more than I can put into words. I may be busy, but that doesn't mean I don't want to be with you." He gently turns your face back towards him, his eyes searching yours. Donnie leans in, his lips brushing against yours softly. "Please, love. Trust me. Let me prove to you that you're worth every moment of my time."

"I love you, more than words can express. And I want to make you happy."

"Say it again." You whisper, cradling his face in your hands. Your lips brush, your heart leaping in your chest. "Please, baby... Say it again..."

Donnie's eyes lock onto yours, his gaze intense with affection and desire. He takes a moment to savor the feeling of your touch against his face, his voice filled with a mix of tenderness and longing.

"I love you, my love. More than words can express. You are my everything, my heart and soul." His voice grows husky as he leans in, his lips capturing yours in a passionate kiss. His hands move to cradle the back of your head, deepening the connection between you.

"I love you... I love you... I love you..." He whispers the words against your lips, his breath mingling with yours.

#{fish answers•°} #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rise donnie #rottmnt x reader #donnie hamato #donnie x reader #teenage mutant ninja turtles donnie #donnie tmnt #rottmnt donnie #donatello x reader #future donatello #donatello hamato #rise donatello #tmnt donatello #future donatello x reader #future donnie x reader #future donnie #rise x reader #rise movie #rise of the turtles #save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #save rise of the tmnt #save rottmnt #unpause rottmnt #unpause rise of the tmnt #unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt donnie x reader

[justmyguiltyggpleasure]

Giselle x Fem Reade - Do Me as a Favor

Summary: Giselle was sick for a few days and missed practice. Having to stay overtime, she was anxious, exhausted, and frustrated. Luckily, you decided to stay behind with her and as her best friend, is your duty to help take her mind off of things.

Dynamics: Top!reader/Bottom!idol

Genre: Smut;

Warnings: +18; oral; fingering; (not much in this one)

Giselle was frustrated, it was always a bit stressful when you had to prepare award ceremony performances, but having missed 3 days of practice due to being sick, she had to make up for the lost time. Which resulted in staying behind after practice ended, she's been doing it for a week and was fed up. She couldn't sleep properly because her mind was always running with things that could go wrong and how the hell was she going to keep up with you girls. She didn't even have the time or energy to get herself off, the sexual frustration plus the exhaustion and anxiety were making her frustrated beyond belief.

- You girls can go ahead, I guess I'll stay behind with Aeri today. I want to go over some steps I'm still not confident in. - Aeri looks at you smiling widely from her sprawled on the floor like a starfish position.

- You're staying with me?!

- Yes, I am. Maybe we can help each other. You seem to have nailed the steps I'm insecure about. - you say, Aeri sits up and nods.

- For sure!

You said your goodbyes to the girls and started practicing right away.

(Almost 2 hours later)

- Let's take a break. - Aeri says pausing the music and taking a sip from her water bottle.

You sit on the floor with your back against the couch, breath harbored and Aeri offers you her water bottle. You thank her and take a big sip, a drop escaping from the corner of your mouth and running down your neck, Aeri follows every movement.

- Can I ask you something? - you nod. - Do me as a favor.

You blink twice before laughing.

- Don't you mean do you a favor?

- No. I mean exactly what I said.

- Is this a joke?

- No... You don't have to tho. Is just... I've been so frustrated lately and way to tired to do anything about it. You've always said I'm pretty so being attractive is not an issue. You've been with girls before and always talk about your crushes in women so I know for a fact you're not strai-

- I'll do it. - interrupting her rambling you answer her request.

- Really?! - her head perked up and you chuckled.

- Are you surprised? I've said it before, you're gorgeous, besides, we trust each other. I just need you to assure me that it won't become a problem between us later. I'm not willing to bet our friendship on some sexual relief. - you end it seriously.

- I promise it won't. I wouldn't bet our friendship on anything.

- Good. Come here. - you pat your lap for her to sit on it and she widens her eyes.

- What? N-now?

- Now is as good a time as any. Manager-unnie is coming to pick us up in a few and I have a feeling you're not the quietest person in bed so I don't think we can do that with anyone around. - she seems to understand your point and crawls to you, straddling your lap with her hands holding your shoulders. You hold her waist and look in her eyes. - Are you sure you wanna do this?

- Yes. - she doesn't hesitate in her answering so you don't hesitate to capture her lips in a kiss which she reciprocates sighing.

- How do you like it? - you ask kissing down her jaw, chin and neck.

- Hm? - you pull away only to be greeted with the sight of Aeri with her eyes closed, biting her bottom lip. It makes you smile

- Would you like it fast and rough or slow and sensual. - you graze your teeth on he earlobe and she sighs again squeezing your shoulders

- I want whatever you're willing to give me. Just give me something, anything. - at this point she was already rocking on your lap and you were starting to lose it.

- Ok. - grabbing a fistful of her hair you pull her into a bruising kiss, smiling into it when you hear her moan. Your other hand on her hip willing her to keep on moving .

She takes it upon herself to deepen the kiss swiping her tongue across your lips to which you let her in without hesitation, moaning when your tongues meet.

She pulls away panting, looking at you with hooded eyes while opening your oversized button up. Following her you pull her shirt over her head, noticing how her bra clasp was at the front, your hand goes for it but before opening you look at her for consent. She nods.

The sight before you makes your mouth water. The cold air of the aircon making her nipples instantly harden.

- I've always had a thing for your boobs y'know?

- Everybody knows that. You're always looking at them. - she says rolling her eyes, smiling teasingly and you smile back - Pervert

That's the last thing she says before throwing her head back with a moan when your mouth goes for her right nipple, your hand pulling on the left one.

You were having fun noticing she was growing desperate by how she was grinding harder against your lap. That is before her phone started ringing.

She groaned before picking it up from the ground and putting it against her ear without looking who it was.

- What?! - frustration evident in her voice. - oh, yes, unnie. Hm... yeah - your lips went back to nipple, your hand rubbing her pussy through her pants. Before she could hold herself back, she moans. Aeri slaps your back and you chuckle agaisnt her skin. - I'm fine, I just hit my knee... okay. We'll be waiting. Let us know when you get here.

- What is it?

- Manager-unnie is coming to get us. Guess fun is over. - she motions to get up and you pull her back.

- We just have to be quick. We have less than 15 minutes. - this time you don't wait to put your hand inside her panties moving your middle and ring fingers in circles on her clit.

- Oh fuck - her voice is breathy. Head thrown back giving you access to her neck where you give open-mouthed kisses and graze your teeth lightly so you leave no marks.

Her soft moans are like music to your ears. The way she moves her hips on your hand drives you crazy.

Pulling your hand away Aeri whines. Biting her lip when she sees you suck your fingers

- Sit on the couch - she does so with no questions, lifting her hips when you pull on her pants and panties altogether. - Open your legs for me.

Her cheeks are in a pink shade. Aeri feels shy all of a sudden but she knows there's no time for embarrassment now so she does as you ask. You look in her eyes yet again searching for some reassurance and she nods.

You close your eyes before running you flattened tongue from her entrance to her clit and you find yourself dripping by her smell and taste and the way her hole closes around nothing, you repeat the motion a few times. One of her hands gripping your hair the other one pulling on her nipple. You look at her face only to be greeted with an Aeri with her face flushed, eyes closed, eyes furrowed but what got to you was the way she smiled while biting her lip.

Pulling her to the edge of couch by her thighs you put her legs around your shoulder. One hand snaking around her leg, resting on the top of her mound pulling back so the hood of her clit no longer covers it. Again you flatten your tongue and rests it at the top of her clit moving ever so lightly so it doesn't hurt her. She hums in approval.

Your free hand travels up her leg, squeezing her inner thigh then positioning two fingers on her entrance. Pushing in slowly while kissing her inner thigh, she gasps when you suck on her inner thigh leaving a mark close to her crotch.

You move your fingers experimentally enjoying her moans.

- F-faster... please... - and you comply. Who are you not to do exactly what a pretty girl asks.

The faster you move the louder she gets. Pulling on her own nipples, her pussy squeezing your fingers, you knew she was close so you go back to suckling on her clit.

Her moans are borderline pornographic at this point and you were praying no one was around or close to the studio.

- I'm gonna cum... I'm gonna cum... please don't stop... Please.... - you didn't. If anything you moved your fingers faster and suckered harder. Letting out the longest moan she arches her back from the couch and you help her with her high.

You pull your fingers out just in time for her phone to vibrate again. You pick it up to let her recover.

- Hello? Ah, yes. We're coming. - turning off the call you look at her and smile. - we gotta go.

- okay. - Aeri stands up on shaky legs and you take it upon yourself to help her get dressed. Aeri looks at you and laughs, you follow her.

- what?

- Your chin. - she cleans her own cum from you lips and chin then peck your lip. - Thank you. Maybe I can return the favor later.

- Wanna shower together when we get home? - you offer.

- I'm dying to.

Taking her hand you pull her out of the door towards the elevator. Both running along the corridors of the building giggling like two teenagers.

Well, Giselle wasn't that frustrated anymore.

___________________>_<_________________

Want to be tagged?

#J-writes #aespa giselle #giselle x reader #giselle x fem reader #giselle smut #gg x fem reader #gg x reader #aespa smut #aespa scenario #aespa x fem reader #aespa x female reader #aespa x reader

[somnambulic-thing]

wrong number 2.2k

A/N: Just had an idea for a fic I will very probably never write in a fully flashed out way because I have a million wips and no attention span and no deisre to have more wips but don't want to fully let this idea go to waste so here it goes in very shortened form and probably very messy and rough.

Eddie x afab!reader || imagine them in their early/mid 30s

cw: mental health themes, reader has a broken leg, angsty shit, fluff, happy end

You moved cities to have a fresh start after a rough time came to an even rougher but long overdue end. You know nobody here, a clean slate to draw new blueprints on.

Two weeks in and despite your grumpy hermit ways, you are friendly with some of your neighbours already. They are nice, helpful people which is a win you take like it was a million bucks.

Three weeks in, you fall down a flight of stairs, break your leg and bump your head. Brilliant.

Back from the ER you sink into your bed, looking at still unpacked boxes and biting back bitter tears of frustration when your phone beeps. You eye it suspiciously, anxious your past might be knocking already, bloodhounds of days past sniffing your weakend state and their chance to inflict a little more pain.

You figure you're overracting, turn on the sceen and find a message from an unknown number.

[Hey Rick. Sorry to drop this on you on such short notice, but I won't make it to your get-home-from-prison party tonight. I can swing by next week with a six-pack or something. You have a good time, yeah? I'll explain when we see each other.]

[Hey there. I'm afraid you got the wrong number. I don't know any Ricks. But gratulations to him from me for getting out of prison, when you get a chance. Unless he's a serial killer or something comparable. Then I want you to run.]

[Well, shit. Sorry.]

And then after a few seconds: [I get back to you in case I need a place to hide.]

And somehow this sparks a conversation that lasts for hours. His name is Eddie, you learn after some minutes of back and forth which are unsuspectedly remarkably funny. But he's surprisingly also really concerned about your leg and your mild concussion and the fact that you mentioned you will give yourself one day of rest and then try to catch up on and get as much stuff done as you can with your cast and crutches. Luckily you can work from home, you say. Eddie isn't sure how he feels about that.

He makes you swear you take it easy. He asks if there are people that can take care of you and you lie to that concerned stranger who is the first person to make you laugh out loud in a too long time. You tell him your friends are taking turns to look after you. Why lie to a stranger? It's complicated... He keeps checking in, keeps chatting with you about all kinds of things all day long no matter what he has to do: Work, band practice, DnD, being out with friends or his uncle, Eddie keeps lighting up your phone all day long. The later the day, the deeper your conversations and you soon get the feeling that Eddie isn't all just fun and jokes but when you actually try to poke softly, he evades you.

[When you feel better and still are interested in my bullshit, I'll share. Promise.]

Okay, fine. Why would he want to trust you with his private struggles? He's just a stranger, with friends and an support system, who probably will lose interest to invest his time into you sooner than he himself is expecting. Which is fine... really... would be fine if he wasn't really funny... and interesting with a hundred interests and hobbies... and so weird and oddly caring... and living on the other side of the country.

But four days in and you wake up with a text from him, asking you if you finally could sleep a little better than the days before.

And then at 3am and endless hours of exchanging messages filled with thoughs and musings and dreams, he offers to send you a copy of a book he is sure you would enjoy. That he really needs... you to read for important reasons. One of them is to remedy the boredom inflicted by bedrest in those hours Eddie is busy and can't entertain you.

You give him your address almost without second thought, despite your mind telling you to maybe think about it first...

You had avoided anything outside of texts - no pictures, no calls - and he hadn't pressed the matter by himself. Which was a relief because you're not sure if you could witstand the temptation if he were to offer.

Getting more pieces of him... It just felt too dangerous. But a book was just a book, right?

You rely on your 72 year old neighbour for food and other errands and chores around your place. Mrs P is such a sweet old lady eager to help as much as she can, bending over backwards for you. So you naturally try to bother her only when it's really dire.

Seven days in and you see the postman stuff a small parcel into your mailbox. You hurry to snatch your crutches, not even thinking about what you are doing and you limp down the six stories to your mailbox way too fast. Your head is not happy and neither is your leg and it takes you and your ego ages and all your strength to get back up to your apartment.

You fall into your bed, exhausted, sweaty and in pain and crying in frustration and you fall asleep on the package from Eddie before you can even think of opening it.

Your phone rings and wakes you up when it's already pitch black outside. You've slept most of the day away.

Answering the phone on autopilot, still half asleep you don't check the name on the screen.

"Yeah?" you drawl.

"Jesus fucking Christ you're alive."

"What--? I--"

"I haven't heard from you in hours and your messages sounded so antsy and sad all day and I had a bad feeling somehow. Are you ok? Did I wake you?"

"Eddie?"

"Yeah, sweetheart. Hi, that's my voice. Anxious edition."

You're overwhelmed. Finding no words while his words dig deep trenches of longing into your brain which are hard to get out of...

"You still there?"

"Uh-hn, yeah..."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. I just woke up, like you said. That's my voice. Sleepy edition."

And then he laughs. Oh god, what a sweet sweet sound.

"Hmm, sorry I just was really worried here..."

You tell Eddie there is nothing to worry about but that he's very sweet and he asks you if you have a little time to chat, tells you he likes your voice, likes it a lot and of course you have time but something weighs on you and the flutter of bats in your stomach.

You can't say if it's the aftershock of your staircase ordeal or the fact that your wonderful stranger keeps getting more and more real and more and more precious or a mixture of both. Suddenly there is silence on the other end of the line.

"Eddie? You still there?"

"Something's off."

You shuffle and feel the parcel poke into your ribs. You dig it out from under you, face heating up from two sources - the gift and his tone - and you start to fumble the parcel open.

"I'm sorry--"

"Don't be. I just want to help. Let me help."

You finally fully unwrap the book. It's a well loved worn paperback copy. You run your fingertips over every wrinkles and cracks in the cover. Your voice sounds dazed to your own ears when you speak.

"I got your book..."

"Oh. Okay, yeah, great. And?"

You notice the excitement in his voice, notice that it matches your heartbeat when you open the book and find it full of notes. On some pages the margines are completly filled with Eddie's toughts.

"I just unwrapped it, like, ten seconds ago."

"Oh."

"I didn't realize you would send me... such a personal thing... looks like a diary..."

"Kinda is. Too weird?"

You stare at his handwriting which is somewhat of an elegant scratch and all those little sketches and something inside you gives way.

"I'm not okay..."

"I know. Tell me?"

You tell him that you lied, that there were no friends despite your eldery neighbor looking after you and you tell him about your little ordeal this afternon and about feeling tired and lonely and scared and starved for joy and he listens through it all.

Now it will be too much, you think but then you look at the book in your lap and keep talking. When you're done, there is silence on the other end.

"You still there."

"Processing."

"Mad?"

"Nope."

"Too much?"

"For me?" He chuckles. It's bitter and wonderful. "Sweetheart, it's not me who's dealing with all that shit right now. If you can handle living it, I can handle listening to it..."

"I hear you swallowing a but."

"But I know what you're talking about..."

You talk a little longer and despite him saying everything is alright, something is different. He seems distant, distracted, not fully with you. You keep leafing through that book, gently tracing the lines that are proof of his existance, marks he left in the world, preparing for him to ask you to send it back as soon as you can. You prepare for him to realize this was a mistake. A charity case gone wrong.

Eventually you get tired and a headache and he tells you to go rest, voice soft and deep and you're preparing for this to be the last time you'll hear it.

"Sleep well, yeah?"

No more sweetheart.

"I will. You too."

"See you tomorrow."

"Bye."

You have a restless night and wake up to a message from him.

[Good Morning. How did you sleep?]

You smile, feeling stupid, like you overreacted and you exchange some messages but they are short and flat and there is still no sweetheart. Around noon, your phone has gone silent. Inside your chest, the echoes of disapointment are deafening.

You bury yourself in his book, and it feels like you're having a conversation with him through his notes for they are like direct replies to your own thoughts about the story unfolding. You can't put it down, probably look up from it for the first time in hours late in the evening when you're full on crying, holding the book away from you to not get tears or snot on it.

And then there is a knock at your door. Three sharp raps. Quick.

And you think it must be Mrs P with your groceries, you feel guilty that she has to carry all the stuff upstairs while her knee is bothering her. You make your way out of bed, get your crutch and slowly move towards the door.

"Coming!"

You realize you still have the book in your hand and you wedge it under your arm to open your door and--

"Hi."

Your heart is racing as your mind tries to keep up with what is happening. You consider pinching yourself, consider reaching out to touch him, see if he's made of flesh and blood or delirium, feel the dip of a frown-made crease betwen his brows under your fingertips, the fine stubble on his cheeks under the slide of your thumb.

"That's my face. Worried edition... why are you crying?"

You lean against the crutch, wipe at your cheeks with one hand, dry your fingers on your shirt and pluck the book from under your arm, holding it up wordlessly. Eddie's face lights up in a big, wide, gorgeous smile. Now there are dimples you want to explore. Suddenly the floor is moving.

"Easy, easy." Warm hands steady you. You hear the door fall close behind you and then it finally dawns on you.

The dreamy guy from inside your phone is inside your flat.

He's holding you steady by your shoulders on outstreched arms, searching your face with big, incredibly dark eyes.

God he's fucking beautiful.

"You gonna faint, beautiful?"

You shake your head. That's all you can do.

"I'm going to use your very understandable shock to ramble for a moment, okay? Okay. The obvious first. What the fuck am I doing here without invitation? Offering you my help. I rearranged all my shit and I can stay for two weeks, if you like. I have a hotel room booked and ready if you don't want me to stay the nights. Next: Why didn't I ask on the phone first? Because I kinda feared you would just say no and be all tough and stupid about needing help. I am way more charming in person and I was counting on me actually being here, a real guy, showing you that I mean it, would make it easier to convince you... Am I pushy? Yeah. I guess I am. But... if you really want me to piss off again, I will piss off. We pretend that I was just getting back my book because you're not fit to get to the post office right now and I'll never bother you again... but I could stay and make you dinner while you tell me which part of the book made you cry, decide over my fate when you're fed and calmed down? I left a whole load of food with your neighbor downstairs. Nice lady. Thinks you're a stubborn thing, by the way."

You swallow around something enourmous and try your vocal cords on something simple.

"Hi."

He tilts his head, smiles softly.

"Hey sweetheart."

You inhale deeply. Your exhale either carries bravery or invites doom but suddenly you're really, really hungry...

"You're really here."

"Yeah, shit, I know... to be honest, my knees are really wobbly right now?"

"You're crazy."

"Hmm, totally... bad case... started about a week ago..."

And there you see it. He's nervous too. That finally makes him real.

"So," you say, reaching out to cup his cheek, your touch coaxing out those dimples again. "What's for dinner then?"

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #long fics I will never write #my fic

[callofdudes]

What’s your HC of König reacting to someone having a crush on him? And Him vice versa? I’d love to read your thoughts! :)

Big boy with lots of big feelings. That's it, that's the headcanon. (I'm kidding, here are my actual thoughts)

I'm going to treat this as y/n x König

König is nervous every day. He lives and breathed anxiety (same bro) so when he meets you he's nervous. When he starts to catch feelings, he's nervous. He genuinely has no idea he's attracted to you. Like yeah you're good looking but that's as far as his mind usually lets him wander before he turns into a nervous pile of goop.

Your compliments affect him in ways others usually don't. Again, he's always nervous so he doesn't see the connection right away. Or for a while in that regard.

"Oh König you're so huge, I'd love to see the world from your perspective!" One compliment that makes his heart twist and melt. You want to be like him?? To see the world like he does??

He would die for you. No second guesses. No second thoughts. You need someone to lay down their life for any reason he is right there.

Unexplainably whipped.

He doesn't understand why, but he is.

He loves to watch you fight, it makes falling in love with you just that much easier. How you stand up for him when he's feeling caught up in himself.

All of a sudden really wants to impress you. Whether it's showing off his strength of sparring others while you watch. König wants to do everything he can to make you see what he is capable of.

He's totally ok with the others talking to you at first. When he sees you hanging around and talking with them it's fine. But when his feelings become deeper rooted the love and infatuation turns to frustration. He's doing everything he can to show off to you, to impress you. And yet you want to talk to the others??

He's is devastated that his anxiety holds him back from conversation with you a lot. He's capable on the field, he can push through like the tank he is, but he couldn't ask you out if he got a million dollars with it.

He gets reprimanded after a difficult mission when he ran back over a field littered with mines just so they wouldn't have to leave you in the danger zone.

He does everything he can to protect you. Even from little things. You're completely capable but he's so nervous he doesn't realize his 'knight in shining armor' act also starts to include stuff like picking you up so you don't have to walk through the mud.

"Good morning, I made you some coffee/tea", "If the recruits ever give you any trouble I promise you can come to me", "Why would I ever let you get hurt??", Some of the things he's said before.

While these things wouldn't seem like a big deal, König is afraid of offering up his help, scared it'll be dismissed and disgarded. But he trusts you, telling you he's always got your back.

His simple admiration and wishes to show off, quickly becomes somewhat of a competition. It's unhealthy, but König hasn't had very many good influences in his life and to lose you would kill him. So he fights for you.

You're very attractive so if another soldier attempts to express affections or fondness, König will either scare them off, or jump into the conversation.

You assume this behavior is just friendly at first. And then you catch on.

König, along with liking your personality, could stare at you for days. He gets anxious when his dreams become you, and only you. And eventually it becomes painful to be around you and not tell you how much he loves you.

The kind of guy to take "I feel the same" as an invitation to show you the giant scrapbook he'd put together of your potential wedding.

He never wanted to confess, until you, classically, got injured and when he was allowed to see you he burst into tears, telling you he was so worried he'd lose you and he couldn't fathom losing someone he loved so dearly.

As for someone crushing on him:

König was very rarely complimented in his childhood. Often hiding his face when people called him a monster until it became a part of him. Mocked for his height and told he couldn't accomplish his dreams of sniper duty with how huge and fidgety he is.

Who could ever fall in love with him?? He's a monster.

So he's pretty dense.

He's used to mockery and such so you being very kind and loving to him is pretty much foreign.

He couldn't put together you loved him if you smacked him over the head with a frying pan and called him yours.

However, when he does figure it out he's flattered. So flattered and a bit confused. I hate to say "why would you love me?" But it's exactly what he'd say.

He's the guy who melts under your compliments. Even before he likes you or know you like him, your compliments just make him feel loved.

He's never dated. Hasn't done anything with anyone ever. But of course, when he finds out you like him his first thought I'd immediately "but I'm so tall?? How could that work? Would they still love me if I couldn't please them??" He's so worried he'll fall short.

"Would you love me if I was a worm" kinda guy.

And same with wanting to impress you if he likes you, it's the same vice versa. If you have a crush on him, he will do everything in his power to impress you. Even if standing in front of you is all it's ever taken.

Baby thinks he can't be loved, I've made that pretty clear. But if you ever treated him to a nice dinner no questions asked no strings attached - you are the most amazing person on the whole planet.

König finds it endearing that while you have a crush on him, you're also protective of him. Keeping other teammates from getting too close or up in his business.

He's flattered when you offer to help with recruits and training. But he's certainly not upset to have you along.

It's most of the same thing.

However, when he finds out someone has a crush on him, for real, it's not a joke. There is like this little protective mode that goes off in his brain. When he isn't so nervous.

The logic is like "they like me, so there shouldn't be any fear?" And he will get cocky. Again, showing off, grabbing your attention, getting close to you as possible.

Not too sure when it switches for König but once he really settles into the fact that he knows you have a crush on him, he is gonna make your blush a permanent fixture on your face.

Just don't flirt back. Oooh don't flirt back. You. Will. Break. Him. Anxiety? Gone. Cockiness? Gone.

"What does it take to get in your bed, big boy?"

König is broken. His brain is stuck. He can't move. When he is flirted with, especially with blatant bedroom talk it melts his brain.

I hope you like it. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it, but I did my best 😅

#call of duty #call of duty headcanons #könig headcanons #könig modern warfare #könig x reader #könig cod #könig x y/n

[lvrdrafts]

From Crumbs to Complete Cinnamon

Summary: You are back in the bakery with Sam, when Bucky comes trying to win your heart again. Will you give in or stay with Sam?

Pairing: Bucky x f!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of suicide

A/N: Imma make a part 4 cus I wanna make Bucky suffer

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Few days later, you returned to the bakery, Sam had taken a few days off to stay with you and make sure you were alright. He had been a constant pillar of support during your recovery, and you couldn't have asked for a better boyfriend.

As you turned around and head to the cashier, you noticed Bucky standing nervously near the counter, his hands in his pockets, looking anxious and remorseful. The sight of him brought back a flood of emotions, the hurt, the anger, and the pain he had caused you. He was the cause of your problems and you didn't feel like hearing his fake apologies. Yet apart of you wanted to get him out of your life as soon as possible. You were finally happy and you didn't ant anything to take that away.

"Y/N, I know I messed up, and I'm so sorry," he began, his voice soft yet filled with sincerity. "I pushed you away when you needed me the most, and I can't believe I let you down like that."

Y/N glanced up at him, her eyes still guarded. "Words won't change what happened, Bucky," you replied, your voice tinged with bitterness. "You can't expect me to forget the shit that happened." You say as your blood was boiling, ready to yell at Bucky for all the pain he caused you.

"I can't stop thinking about you," Bucky confessed, "and I can't bear the thought of losing you. I don't want to waste any more time. Let's give us a chance."

Your frustration boiled over. "A chance? You mean after I almost died? Now you want to give us a chance?" you retorted, your voice tinged with anger. "Where were you when I needed you, Bucky? Why didn't you care about us then?"

Bucky looked taken aback by her outburst, but he pressed on. "I made a mistake, Y/N, and I'm sorry," he said, "but I've realized how much you mean to me, and I want to make things right. Please, just give me a chance to show you how much I care."

You shook your head, feeling hurt and betrayed. "I won't forget everything that happened," you said, your voice shaking with emotion, "and I can't trust that you won't push me away again when things get tough."

Bucky's eyes softened, and he took a step closer to you, trying to reach out for your hand. "I promise you, Y/N," he said earnestly, "I won't push you away again. I know I messed up, and I regret it every day. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to prove myself to you. To be honest you owe me for all those times I hung out with you while dating Diana"

Sam, who had been observing the conversation from a distance, couldn't stay silent any longer. He stepped forward, standing next to you, showing his support and protectiveness.

"Y/N doesn't owe you anything, Bucky," Sam said firmly, his voice tinged with a touch of anger. "She's been through enough, and she deserves someone who will treat her right from the start."

Bucky looked at Sam, a mix of guilt and remorse in his eyes. "I know, Sam," he said, "and I'm sorry for everything I've put her through."

"After everything that happened, I realized that I couldn't continue my relationship with Diana. It wasn't fair to either of us, especially knowing how I felt about you."

You looked surprised by his revelation. You hadn't expected him to make such a decision, but you listened intently, curious to hear what he had to say.

"I was using my relationship with Diana as a distraction," Bucky continued, "trying to bury my feelings for you deep down. But it wasn't working. The truth is, I've always had feelings for you, even when I was pushing you away."

You could feel Sam's reassuring presence beside you, and it gave you the strength to speak up. "Bucky, I appreciate your apology and you confession," you said, your voice steady, "but the stunt you pulled while dating Diana and then breaking up with Diana in a second, how do I know you won't do the same when someone else gets hurt by your idiotic actions. I need to focus on my well-being and moving forward, and that means establishing boundaries."

Sam placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, offering his silent support. "Y/N's made her decision," he said to Bucky, "and you need to respect it. She's with me now, and I won't let anyone hurt her again."

Bucky nodded, a mix of sadness and understanding in his expression. "I get it," he said, "and I won't push anymore. Just know that I truly am sorry, Y/N, and I'll always care about you."

As Bucky walked away, you felt a mix of emotions. Part of you was relieved that he had finally accepted your decision, but another part of you couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness for what could have been.

You turned to Sam, grateful for his unwavering support and love. "Thank you," you said softly, "for being here for me and for standing up for me."

Sam smiled warmly, wrapping his arms around you. "I'll always be here for you," he said, "no matter what. You deserve someone who will love and cherish you, and I'm not going anywhere. Even if other guys trying hitting on you"

In that moment, you knew that you had made the right choice. With Sam by your side, you had found the love and happiness you had always deserved. The pain of the past was slowly fading away, replaced by a future filled with love, laughter, and the comfort of knowing that you were finally with the right person.

As you leaned into Sam's embrace, you knew that you were safe and loved, and that was all that mattered

Taglist : @marygoddessofmischief @666yourmomdotcom @openup-yourmind @almosttoopizza @maddieislost @kentokaze @floralwslokicjand10 @vicmc624 @sunset90 @cjand10 @matchat3a @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @blueraspberryreader @that1nerd-20 @chemtrails-club @marvel-fandom23 @mewmeoww @niyah834 @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @christinesdemoness1958 @matchat3a @kentokaze @mayusenpai666 @smplymrvl @chemtrails-club @emerald-writer @zeysartzone @yoruse

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader angst #bucky x reader #winter soldier x reader #winter soldier x reader angst #sam wilson x reader #sam wilson x reader fluff

[overandundertarot]

How should you spend this time of peace?

This pick a card reading is intended to give some advice and insight on how you can spend the peaceful/mundane parts of your life at this time. For those little parts of the day that are quiet and you just feel like doing something.

Please keep in mind that this is a general reading so if something doesn't resonate/feel right- leave it! Feel free to pick another pile or another pick a card. Trust your intuition always.

Please pick a pile (1-6)(left to right)

PILE ONE:

Card; King of wands. You should spend your time staying on top of your game! Work on what you love, you have the ability for great change right now. There's something that you're very passionate about and you should dediate a lot of time to it right now. It will bring you great fulfilment! confirmations; filming, movies, greenlight, cars, social media.

PILE TWO:

Card; Ace of wands reversed. Pile two you may have the tendency to frequently start new hobbies or have many ideas that you never end completing. Use this time to tie up loose ends. Finish your projects or just cut off those ideas/goals that aren't serving you anymore. So that you can work on what really matters to you. Don't spend too much time overthinking about this, it'll be surprisingly simple once you start. confirmation; travel, music, lgbtq+, magic.

PILE THREE:

Cards; The Fool reversed, The Empress. Listen to yourself and your instincts. There's a pretty important part of you that you've been repressing. Let yourself shine and do things that make you feel like a god/goddess. Maybe you have a weird fashion sense, or a "creepy" hobby. Do whatever you want, be sensual and passionate! Go out and have fun! But be careful of being reckless/naive. confirmations; cottagecore, surprises, time limit, blocks.

PILE FOUR:

Card; Page of wands reversed. It's time to bring something to a close. You've been working on something as of late but right now you're getting really frustrated. I feel like whatever it is has a way of bleeding into every aspect of your life, so much so that you are constantly worried and feeling anxious. Just try to see it through till the end, take a break and then look at it again if you need to. It can't always be perfect, but it will never be complete if you keep overthinking and overanalysing. You may have just jumped right in without knowing what you were getting into, but try to see it through till the end! Other people's opinions may really make or break you right now, but you have to look at it objectively and trust in that inspiration you had in the beggining. confirmations; paperwork, deadline, skies, boss or superiors, lanscapes.

PILE FIVE:

Card; Queen of swords reversed, Queen of Pentacles. These are the people pleasers of the group! You're being encouraged to be more egotistical. It may feel selfish to prioritise yourself, but at the end of the day you'll just feel exhausted from performing for other people and putting their needs first. Take care of yourself! And PUT YOURSELF FIRST! Especially if it is something career/business related, operate from a priority of the best possible outcome for you. This may be time to splurge a little on yourself, which may look reckless or illogical but just do it! Practice physical self care, buy yourself flowers, spend time in nature. Calming activitites like that will help you build confidence. confirmations; birds, flowers and plants, gold jewelry, money, fur.

PILE SIX:

Card; Six of cups reversed, Four of wands. Spend your time moving towards action. Its a wonderful time of expansion for you, you're taking inspiration from past experiences and combining them with the security and stability you already have to expand your horizons. This feels peaceful, you may be going on vacation soon and are excited to relax. I'm getting that you're very excited for this summer, it feels different than the others so far and you have a lot planned. Good, do whatever you feel called to do and make sure to try out a lot of new things, food and fruit in specific. There may a new love interest coming into your life soon. confirmation; sunshine, beaches, palm trees, upwards, food, cinnamon, beautiful smile.

That's it! Thanks for participating in this pick a card!

#tarot reading #free reading #free tarot reading #tarot #tarotblr #tarot community #tarot pick a card #pick a card reading #pick a picture #pick a card #pac #divination #intuitive reading #pick a pile #tarot pick a pile #tarot pick a picture

[maraschinomerry]

Hi! Ive really enjoyed your Lockwood and Co fic’s so far, especially how you incorporate gn-readers! As for a prompt to give: A George Karin X GN Reader fic where George works himself sick on researching a case and no one else really notices he’s sick other than Reader, and Reader makes him stop and takes care of him for the night. A quote to go along with this maybe: “No one ever cared about me like you.” There’s really not enough George fics out there, so thank you for rectifying that!

Chicken Soup

Pairings: George Karim x gn!reader

Content: literally just 99% fluff, the other 1% is reader misunderstanding when George tries to confess his feelings

A/N: this fic takes me to less than 1000 words off having posted 30,000 words in 4 weeks 🤯 will have to see if I can post another later!

Word count: 2.1k

Taglist: @neewtmas @marinalor @ettadear

George looked tired.

He usually looked at least a little worn out, so you weren't overly surprised, but this time it was more distinctive. Plus, his exhaustion was always paradoxically frantic, brought about by rushing to prepare for a case that needed solving yesterday, but this time Lockwood had specifically said nobody was going anywhere near the site until you and George were confident there was no more research to be done. You'd hoped that would mean George would take his time, but it seemed his brain had forgotten how to function in any way that wasn't cramming 3 days' worth of research into 3 hours.

"Let's call it a day," you prompted. The two of you had been glued to your seats around a stack of papers in the Archives all day and your back was getting horrendously stiff. George couldn't be faring much better, hunched so far over his book he practically disappeared into his orange plaid shirt.

"You head back, I just need a bit longer to finish off," he replied, not even glancing up. Under normal circumstances, you'd be able to use his frustration at the impossible deadline to lure him away, but what on earth were you supposed to say when it was self-inflicted?

"Are you sure? Lockwood did say to take as long as we need, so it can wait until morning."

George looked up then, only to shake his head. You knew what he was thinking: by tomorrow, the book he needed could have been borrowed by someone else; by tomorrow, Kipps' crew could have swanned in and solved the whole case; by tomorrow, there may not be anyone at the site left to employ them. You sighed.

"Sorry, I know it's a pain. Will you be okay getting home alone?" Trust him to be worrying about you when you were worrying about him. You assured him you'd be fine, and promised to have a cup of tea ready when he got home.

"You're the best," he said with a weary smile. Secretly he didn't want you to leave, he enjoyed your company, but it was unfair to make you stay just because he wanted to. As you walked away, you heard him sniff, which built into a sneeze. Hmm.

—

Less than ten minutes after you returned to Portland Row, the heavens opened. Rain hammered against the front door like it was begging to be let in, and wind whistled through every corner it could find from the attic downwards. 

You, Lucy and Lockwood sat around the dining table, soaking in every ounce of the warmth that seeped from the oven while dinner cooked (a steak pie you'd made when you got back, to distract yourself from the anxious knot in your stomach).

"How did it go at the Archives?" Lucy asked over a steaming cup of coffee.

"We're making progress, but I'm worried George is overworking himself."

Lockwood gave a wry chuckle. "Trust me, if George has a limit, I haven't seen him hit it in all the time I've known him."

That wasn't overly convincing - having bursts of intense hard work followed by a couple of days to recover was one thing, but working flat out for this long was another, especially when you knew from hearing the way the house shifted that he hadn't been sleeping.

"He was sneezing when I left," you pointed out. If Lockwood knew him so well, he'd know he wasn't much of a sneezer, even in the height of pollen season.

"This case dates back decades," Lucy countered. "Imagine how much dust is on some of those files." Just thinking about it made her nose crinkle. You could only hope they were both right.

—

A long-cold cup of tea and the remaining quarter of the pie awaited George when he returned, the last embers of daylight being snuffed out by the heavy rainclouds above. The second the key rattled in the front door, you sprang from where you'd been falling asleep on the Thinking Cloth and clicked the kettle on.

"You didn't wait up for me, did you?" George croaked from the kitchen doorway. Something had happened to his voice in the hours since you'd left him.

"I promised you tea!" As you turned in mock outrage you noticed something else wrong. He was shivering and pale. Instinctively, you stepped closer, brushing a hand across the droplets on his shoulders and spotting more in his hair. Had he walked home in this weather? No. There wasn't enough water for that. This was just from the cab to the door. He wasn't shivering from the cold. You suddenly remembered the sneeze earlier.

George was ill.

This was a disaster, and it was all your fault. You should have forced him to come home with you. Should have noticed sooner and never let him out today in the first place.

"Oh Georgie," you murmured, almost as much to yourself as him. "Give me one minute with that tea and then you need to get to bed."

"I'm f-fine," he stammered around chattering teeth. "It's nothing."

As if he'd been summoned as backup, Lockwood sauntered in on his way to the basement. "Glad to see you missed the rain," he joked. George gave another sneeze, a spray of said rain flying from his curls with the force of it. "Bathroom's free if you want a bath to warm up." Misguided as Lockwood was in his reason for the advice, it wasn't a bad idea actually.

"I'm just heading up," you shot him a grateful look before George could object, "I can set it running." Lockwood grinned and disappeared. Today was not one of his observant days, it seemed.

"I can run my own bath," George grumbled, still in the doorway, but his cheeks flushed a little and he made no move to stop you. Probably because his hands were shaking so much he would have struggled to even turn the taps. You took his freshly brewed tea in one hand and his arm in the other and guided him to the library to cosy up until the bath was ready.

—

Half an hour later, you were debating whether to go and make sure George hadn't fallen asleep in the tub when he emerged. His dark curls were damp yet fluffy from the towel, a slight glow had returned to his skin and he was dressed in the clean pyjamas you'd looked out for him. He frowned at you as best his tired muscles would allow, pondering the fact you'd clearly spent the entire time sitting on the bottom step outside the bathroom. Before he could comment, however, the warmth of the bath began to wear off and the tremble returned to his bones. You reached behind you and sheepishly held out a fuzzy forest green bundle.

"I, um… I couldn't find any of your jumpers, I think they're all in the wash, so you can borrow this one. It should fit."

George took hold of it and unfolded what turned out to be the softest hoodie he'd ever felt in his life. He wriggled into it, his one working nostril breathing in the way the smell of you lingered in the fabric. It was so comfy that he found himself burrowing into it, bringing it up under his chin and tucking his hands into the sleeves.

You caught yourself staring at him, marvelling over how he could look so adorable in such an unfortunate situation, and gave him a soft smile. "Better?"

He nodded and mumbled out a "thanks" which ended up somewhat drowned in the hoodie as he shuffled away. Halfway through his bedroom door, he stopped and turned back to you. "What's that?"

You went to see what he was referring to, hands on his shoulders to support yourself as you pressed close on tiptoes to peer past him. Suddenly very aware of how close you were, you focused your attention on the flask on his bedside table.

"Oh. It's chicken soup. I wasn't sure if you'd want it just yet, so I used a flask which should keep it warm for the next few hours."

If you hadn't been aware of how much you were in George's personal space before, you certainly were now as he practically melted against you.

"That's so thoughtful." He sounded shocked. Not at you being thoughtful towards him, at anyone being so. Unsure of what to say, you gave his shoulders a supportive squeeze and then used them to steer him towards his bed.

His room was a little chilly, so you checked that his window was properly closed before drawing the curtains. George, energy almost completely drained, flopped onto the bed. You helped him tuck his legs under the duvet,  bringing it up around his chest. He sniffled again, and without a word you nudged the box of tissues you'd found and set out for him. His eyes grew wide and incredulous, suddenly scrunching shut with another bout of sneezing.

"Do you need anything else?"

The sneezing paused. "I think I left my book in the library…"

"Georgie, no." Your voice became stern even as you used his nickname affectionately. "No more research until you're feeling better." He began to protest. "Think about it. The more you rest, the sooner you'll recover and the quicker you can get back to it." He couldn't argue with logic, and you both knew it.

You ended up fetching him a glass of water, some paracetamol and a couple of contraband biscuits. When you returned, you found him sipping the soup, and his face lit up at your last offering.

"You're too nice," he sighed, insisting on splitting the first biscuit with you. "I love you."

You almost choked on your half of the biscuit, bursting into a coughing fit you'd expect from the actual ill person in the room. George immediately rose from the pillows to pat your back as you tried to remember how to breathe. "Are you okay?" His hand stopped patting as your coughing subsided but it didn't leave your back, instead rubbing gentle circles.

"I…" you spluttered, finally dislodging the rogue crumb. "Do you really mean that?"

"Of course I do! No one ever cared about me like you."

His words were kind, tender, yet your heart still sank. He'd just said it because you were looking after him. You couldn't believe you'd actually thought for a moment that he loved you. There was nothing more you wanted than for the ground to swallow you up, but when George kept talking you stayed and listened. "Lockwood and Lucy do so much for me, don't get me wrong, and my parents did their best, but I'd be lost without you. I mean, all this…" he gestured around at the flask, the hoodie, you still sitting on his bed,  "nobody else even noticed there was anything wrong. But you did. You see me, and I love you for it."

Tears welled in your eyes. You blinked them away, refusing to obscure your view of the beautiful boy beside you. His hand stilled on your back, twitching away, afraid he'd said the wrong thing. You leaned into his side, strengthening the touch. "I love you too."

His eyelids fluttered, a mixture of exhaustion and adoration. His free hand linked with yours. "Remind me to kiss you once I'm better."

"Why can't you kiss me now?"

"Because I'll make you ill, if I haven't already!"

"I'll take that risk." You leaned in.

"Nooo," he whined, a hand on your chest to keep you at a distance, "I'd feel bad. But lucky for you, I have a fantastic doctor, so I'll be better in no time."

"Oh yes, I hear they're exceptional and very committed. Now lie down."

George did as he was told, gasping at the rush of cold air as the duvet was lifted behind him. You eased yourself into the bed, legs tangling in his and pulling you closer until his back leant against your chest and your face was buried in his hair.

"What did I just say?!"

You shushed him. "It's fine, if I catch it you can look after me." You pressed a kiss to his temple as you reached over to click the lamp off. He groaned in the darkness.

"You're impossible."

"You love me, though."

His hand found yours again, bringing your arm to wrap round his stomach. Your fingers traced the warm, soft skin underneath the hem of your hoodie. He sighed contentedly, the rise and fall of your chest behind him lulling him closer to sleep. "I do."

You sneezed.

Damn it.

#lockwood & co x reader #george karim x reader #george karim #gn!reader #lockwood & co fanfic #lockwood and co

[libelelle]

OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMER. my opinion on Silver is by no means the single correct one nor do i think it should be, do what you do idc. we're all here throwing him at a wall repeatedly for fun

Ok so. whats the point i wanted to make. oh yeah right

SILVER THE HEDGEHOG!!!! FUCK!!!!

his character is so interesting this is a character for sure. im screaming and crying etc etc. the unfortunate part is NO ONE GETS HIM. i see a lot of interpretations that cherry pick his personality and experiences and it just! isnt it! he is a complicated character!

trying to simplify him down to 🥺innocent soft boi🥺 doesn't work, not only cause you're ignoring his DEBUT GAME (NEVER FORGET HE TRIED KILLING SONIC) but also because you just disconnected him from his entire backstory and motivations. i see people making Silver into a "cinnamon roll" guy and it always makes me grimace because... do you know WHY he is clueless. do you know why he doesn't get things or is too trusting or this or that. its because he grew up in the apocalypse alone. he hasn't experienced anything normal or healthy in his entire life. and since these traits, which are used to make him into the innocent cinnamon roll, are a result of growing up in a very abnormal environment, are symptoms of having never been in social situations and never had a normal day-to-day life. this means you can't ignore the OTHER characteristics that result from it. by this i mean hes very independent, very stubborn and aggressively mean (i recommend watching any of Silvers interactions in the Rivals games. he is extremely confrontational and a very good example of the kind of behaviour i'm talking about). but since this doesn't fit the bill for the character that you want him to be, you remove the context. him being clueless has nothing to do with his background. hes anxious cause hes a smol bean, not because hes been drowning in responsibility and trauma for as long as hes been alive. hes kind because hes innocent, not because he chose to be despite it all

"but linnea! what about IDW! hes very innocent in that!" INCORRECT BUZZER. IDW is not the same. i'll admit, the writing isn't always what i want or expect for Silver, but there's something important for you to note here

Silver is ✨Recovering✨

from my perspective at least. what i see is Silver, who has actively been working together with other people for MONTHS. he has friends, a support net, as well as hobbies. these are things he didn't have before, and being with these people, in both calm and hard times, helped him. So what we are seeing isn't the trauma responses, we're seeing the result of being acclimatized into a healthier and safer position. that's why there's a change in behaviour. this doesn't mean hes a soft boy now. AGAIN hes complicated. be careful not to boil him down to a single trait. in IDW we still see moments where he experiences difficulties because of his past. examples include when he met Whisper, Failed Social Interaction and said this:

he struggles with boundaries! of course he does! he's still getting the hang of being around people

then also recently when he came to help Sonic in 58:

he is struggling!! with nothing to focus on! his default is fight fight save the future fight!! he's not used to normal life and that makes him anxious and frustrated, unable to focus on things he cares about, as we see in the future growth comic in the 2022 annual

there are likely more examples but idc. need to finish this post. continuing, Silver is complicated, meaning that even when he is aggressive and tunnel visioning on a task, he has more going on. one thing i fucking lovee LOVE love about Silver is that he has hope. fuck if i were him i think i'd have given up. THOSE horrors? every day? no thanks

Silver feels anguish and frustration and fear. this being said even at his angstiest moments he has hope. you cannot look me in the eye and tell me that Silver fought through every horrible disaster, coming back to a newly devastated world every time and decided to continue with no hope for a better future. he is determined and he has hope, even if he has to fight tooth and nail for it. Usually when i think about Silver and his odd optimism, i go back to '06, when he's having his moral crisis over killing sonic.

"To kill someone to save the world... is that really the right thing to do?"

it would've been understandable if he decided it was the right thing to do, even if sonic was someone who was kind and loved, because that's just how bad the world is. maybe its just me, but the way this thought broke through in spite of his bull headed focus on destroying the iblis trigger speaks to me about his nature as a person. even coming from the bleak world he came from and even with the tunnel vision he had, he still considered this one persons life to be important too.

he is, at heart, a very gentle and kind person. he is, at heart, someone who is strong and who wants to help others. a version of Silver that is sad all the time, unable to see the good in the world (a phenomena i don't see much of thankfully) isn't true to Silver as a character because its missing that core trait to his character, that he wants to help because he cares.

Silver can't be one or the other. one way ignores his background and his trauma, which leaves out important parts of his personality, the other just abandons a very integral part of who he is.

the point really is to say that (slaps roof of Silver) this bad boy can fit so much layers!

#if i got it wrong you are welcoming to blast me with your psychic waves #if you aren't psychic though you have to be niceys though #AGAIN. im not trying to dictate anyones interpretations of him. the world is a beautiful place and your perspective likely has something #i didnt consider. characters are great in that theyre meant to be interpreted. #anyways 3 am rapidly approaches. time to eep #analysis #silver the hedgehog #long post #talk tag

[hooked-on-elvis]

Hello!! I was just wondering about something...we don't really have a understanding of Elvis' personality, yeah we have books, videos and articles about the people they were around him but I'm talking about REALLY getting a hold of what personality he had is what's been circling my mind lately.

I don't know why, I've been really interested in personalities recently lol specifically Elvis'😅

Hi, sweetie! Yours is a good question to keep in mind, really. I like to wonder on this topic too. I guess Elvis' personality is very difficult to summarize because of the way his actions contradicted themselves in the messages they give. He was mainly a good person, as we all know, but also incoherent and even scary at times. It's frustrating trying to describe him because nothing seems to fit well-enough to describe how intense he was.

One thing we know for sure is how dual Elvis was - and we all are, no doubt, but Elvis's duality was very prominent, very much like changing one thing into the complete opposite in no time, as if there was no middle ground, just this or that.

The way I see it, EP was like a whole universe with all it's wonders and scary truths put together at once; like white and black, the good and bad, fire and rain, light and dark, a desert weather and a harsh winter in just one little space. He could be a spontaneous, extroverted open person, very sweet, generous, peaceful, attentive, warm, easy-going, friendly, supportive, affectionate, loyal, very wise, meditative, spiritually fervent believer in God, family-oriented, just an ingenuous little boy with a soothing peaceful and loving energy that could calm the most anxious of hearts that approached him, without even meaning to, and yet at the same extent he could also be shy, a loner, mean (here and there, both in words and actions), freezing cold, selfish, a loner, unreasonable, hot-tempered, promiscuous, sly, hopeless and lost, a control freak and a reckless disturbed man with such intense energy people could be afraid of doing something that could unleash the beast in him (that's why very, very little of his friends or family were brave enough to go against any thing Elvis would say/do or with his way of thinking), and then again he would turn into something else... He would look so confident, so strong and self-assured, a very powerful entity, but around the ones he trusted just enough he still let himself be vulnerable, acting just like a baby, begging for someone to take care of him, to show him patience, understanding, to make him feel safe, to hold him and never let go.

With the little knowledge we have about EP, we could use those and many adjectives to describe his personality but we can't summarize Elvis Presley better than to simply say he was human. Elvis was "too much of everything"... overwhelming, in a good and a little bad way too. The way he was such a good person, the way through his friends, family, co-workers and fans' memories Elvis sounds like one of the best people one could ever have the pleasure of meeting in this life, his moments of irrational and hurtful actions (towards people and himself) confuses us when we try to understand what Elvis was really about. I bet it was very confusing to understand him even for his family, lovers and friends, so it wouldn't be easy for us to understand him when we not really met him in person.

The King's personality is so intriguing! That's why there's books with analysis in both scientific medical and social fields, psychologists and psychiatrists wrote after studying Elvis' behavior patterns and what they tells us about him. Much beyond the stories their friends and general acquaintances told and how they portrayed EP in those many books and interviews we read/saw over the years, I think those psychological studies are the best way to go in depth about Elvis' personality. Even so I don't believe one single book can do all the accurate, proper work on it, one of those books I can mention now is "The Inner Elvis - A Psychological Biography Of Elvis Aaron Presley" by Peter O. Whitmer Ph.D. - I haven't read the book myself because I want to finish the friends and family books, the most important ones at least, before going deeper into Elvis' personality analysis but I've read parts of it and it's interesting. I would recommend you, if you haven't yet, to read this book.

Anyhow, I think we'll never have an accurate picture of Elvis Presley as a person, friend. One: Because people in general are difficult to understand. We contradict ourselves all the time, according to the situations we face. And two: Because nobody, for the best they can be at reading people, can really tell us what goes on inside another one's heart and mind. I guess being such a mystery is another wonder of Elvis. Another thing we can be sure of about him is that he was even not close to be a boring person.

#elvis presley #elvis #elvis the king #elvis fans #elvis fandom

[soft-girl-musings]

Last Night -- Chapter 2 (Shots Fired)

chapter 1 chapter 3

cross-posted to ao3

Jake Lockley x fem!Reader

tags: more angst, potential misuse of alcohol, author likes to say the fuck word, insensitive language toward the system

wc: 1.4k

fic summary: You're usually tight-lipped about your frustrations, especially when it comes to Jake. But a drink too many leaves you spilling your thoughts one by one.

You'd known you couldn't hide forever.

__________

"Hide" is a strong word. But as you'd knocked back your third, fourth, and fifth shots of the night, you'd realized that's exactly what you were doing. You were hiding.

Meaning it was only a matter of time before you were found.

And there was always a 1-in-3 chance you wouldn't like who did the finding.

If it'd been Steven, he would have doted on you, as always. He wouldn't pry or pester for details; he'd make sure you were comfortable and at ease before turning in for the night.

If it'd been Marc, he'd have likely let you sleep it off on your own. You never really discuss the hard stuff with him; you both get so uncomfortable, you tend to call it quits until you can regroup over something else.

You'd really hoped it wouldn't be Jake.

So of course it was him who had whisked you away from your pity party, zeroed in on your stress and wouldn't back down until he was satisfied.

The ride home is quiet, unbearably so. Not that you want to talk; your head is still spinning, and you're not sure you fully trust the thoughts that threaten to come out. But you can tell that Jake's itching to speak to you, his eyes flitting between the road and the rearview mirror to check on you every few seconds.

His anxious gaze would be bad enough without his refusal to break the silence. You shift in your seat, leaning against the window. "If you have something to say, just say it."

"I was hoping you'd take the lead, querida." You can't see his hands beneath his gloves, but you're sure his knuckles are white.

You let your eyes drift closed, your head now throbbing. "I have nothing to say." A boldfaced lie, but he doesn't need to know that. Knowing Jake, he's close to figuring it out anyway.

"Who's Evan?" There it is.

"Don't worry about it."

"Of course I'm going to worry, look at you. If he made you do this to yourself..." Jake clicks his tongue, and you're sure he's imagining ways to get back at him.

"I didn't 'do anything' to myself, Jake. I'm an adult who made an adult decision."

"An adult mistake," he chuckles dryly.

"Oh, real mature." You press yourself against the car door, eager to go home and put tonight behind you.

"....So you're not going to tell me about Evan?"

"No, Jake, I'm tired."

"Was it just that guy from work, or wherever? Or is there something else going on?" You feel his hand come over and rest on your knee, making your stomach lurch at the touch that's usually comforting. You push him away.

"It's nothing, Jake. Just drop it."

"Cariño, if you have a problem, I want to help-"

"I know, but I said drop it!" you shout. Something you've never done before.

Your outburst hangs heavy in the air between you. Jake's hand moves back to the wheel, gripping it with the same force as before.

"Bet you'd tell Marc or Steven." he mutters under his breath.

"What was that?" You turn in your seat, finally facing him.

Jake sets his jaw, eyes on the road. "I said, I bet you'd tell Marc or Steven whatever's bothering you."

You sit up. "You want to go there? Let's fucking go there, Jake. You're what's bothering me right now." You can feel your face heating up, your anger rushing to the surface once more.

"Marc and Steven would give me a chance to catch my goddamn breath. They wouldn't hound my friends for my location-"

"-She called me, I didn't-"

"-they wouldn't drag me home like a child, or jump down my fucking throat every time I have an off day."

"You didn't answer your phone, we had plans and-"

"And I forgot! Fucking sue me, Jake!" You throw your hands up in frustration and turn back toward the window. Whatever sober, sensible part of you that had remained was now drowned out by the broken emotional dam you couldn't shut off if you wanted to.

Shaking your head, you sigh. "Things were easier before." You don't know if you mean for him to catch that.

He does.

Drawing a deep breath, Jake turns so he can see your face when you answer. "Before what, cariño?" he asks quietly.

Your eyes are already closed as you lean against the glass. All the energy you'd spent venting left you exhausted, the alcohol finally staking its victory over you. You manage the strength to murmur a reply before you drift to sleep.

"Before I met you."

__________

The next morning hits you like a ton of bricks.

You struggle to move from beneath your blanket, you're so sore. Funny, you don't remember getting into bed.

As you reach for another pillow to block out the sunlight, you feel the soft sleeves of your sweatshirt shift against your arm. You pause. This isn't what you were wearing last night.

Last night...

The memories are slow to surface, all jumbled into one big mess of headache and chaos. What happened last night?

You open one eye to check the time. You wince; it's almost noon. Looks like you're calling in sick.

–the thought of which makes you gag, and you rush to the bathroom before you ruin your bedsheets. Thankfully you make it in time, hunching over the toilet with breakneck speed. You get a flash of a memory: who the hell let you order whiskey? And so much?

There was whiskey… and Jake. You definitely remember Jake being there.

“Jake?” you call out weakly. He had to still be around, especially if he was at the bar (ugh, you're never going back there) when you drank. He wouldn’t leave your side for a cold, let alone a hangover.

You groan as another wave of nausea hits. “Hey, Jake? Can you bring me a seltzer?” You’re going to be here for a while.

By the time you’ve emptied every possible ounce of your stomach, you realize you never got a response.

“Jake?” You lift yourself off the floor, gripping the bathroom counter. When you steady yourself, something seems off.

Half the counter is empty.

“Marc? Have you been cleaning again?” Taking stock, you see none of your favorite products have moved. The others are missing.

The silence in the apartment is now unsettling, your voice echoing a bit louder than usual with no reply.

Yelling. You remember yelling. Was that really you? That can’t be right, you never raise your voice–

Yet your throat smarts, indicating otherwise. Combined with the acidic punishment your stomach just put you through, your voice feels hoarse.

This isn’t right, something must have happened.

You decide to retrace your steps as best you can, jumping through the shower to clear your mind.

I got off work, the girls took me out. There was yelling, at some point. And Jake. We drank… no, he wasn’t there until the end. Right? He left me– no, brought me outside. And we drove…

The hot water does little to unscramble your memory; your head feels as foggy as the mirror you peer into as you brush your teeth. You put on clean pajamas and venture to the living area with caution.

On the kitchen counter, you find your favorite bagel and a banana arranged on a plate, a jar of peanut butter beside them. Your water bottle is full. Shivering, you turn to see the window is open. It’s chilly outside, but the fresh air does help clear your mind a bit more.

Steven must have set this up, you conclude. You beeline for the water and down most of the bottle before you notice there’s a note taped to the side.

When you read it, the bottle slips from your hand, spilling as it clatters to the ground.

You’re frozen in place as everything rushes back to your memory: every emotion, every word, the entire evening. Including the last thing you said to Jake in the car.

The words of the note bleed together from the spill, but you crouch down and pour over them again and again, too focused to notice the puddle you’re kneeling in.

Going back to mine for a bit. Let me know when you’re ready to talk about last night.

-Jake

You fucked up.

__________

A/N: one part to go! this was a trip to write, but I'm enjoying the process. tysm for reading! <3

tagging @lunar-ghoulie and @romanarose, as promised (ty for your support!)

#my works #moon knight #moon knight fanfic #jake lockley #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley/reader #jake lockley x fem!reader #jake lockley/fem!reader #jake lockley angst #jake lockley fanfic #jake lockley fanfiction

[pineappleciders]

TRIGGER WARNING: self-harm, blades, lots of mentions of cutting. also mental health topics.

main 4 headcanons for finding out reader self-harms; platonic

includes: stan, kyle, cartman, and kenny

A/N: sorry for being kinda inactive i'm experiencing somewhat of a burnout?? kinda stressed cuz of school and stuff. i wrote this on a whim at night, also the assumed form of sh for reader is cutting. also this isn't intended to be angsty

STAN MARSH

he'd be really confused. he knows the basics about depression and other disorders/illnesses, but he hasn't really put enough research into it to know why you'd do that??

"does it hurt?" nah stan it's completely painless!! of course it hurts

"oh. sorry"

stan is curious and wants to ask why cutting could help relieve stress or emotion. in his eyes, that'd do the exact opposite! he can't find the idea of wounding yourself repeatedly to be calming, but he tries to hear you out

he's concerned, and considers telling your parents about it, but he isn't like that. so he opts to tell you to tell them yourself

"you could like, tell your parents and maybe see a therapist. i don't know a lot about this stuff, but i can't imagine cutting yourself is good for you."

every now and then if you're getting anxious or something he'll put his hand on your shoulder, giving you a smile and maybe some encouraging words. he gives you little pep talks if you're about to do something scary

he doesn't treat you differently, but he's sure to keep your problems in mind whenever you leave suddenly, cry, or act weird. he might be a little anxious about it at first, but he trusts you not to do something reckless

he probably gets angrier if someone messes with you. he doesn't really think about why, but if he had to then he'd say it's because "you're already going through a lot, dude. people don't even consider that sometimes, it pisses me off."

that also helps him take other's feelings into consideration more, and tries to see the other side of the story more often.

KYLE BROFLOVSKI

i can see him either asking to see your cuts, or thinking about asking but deciding against it. i feel like he'd be act a little rash and might ask anyways, like if he doesn't stop to think about what reaction that could elicit

he regrets saying it after he does, but if you show him your wounds/scars, he'll probably insist on cleaning them up and bandaging them

like stan, he's very confused and concerned. he's heard about stuff like this but hasn't really experienced it first-hand, and his only real experience with depression was with stan, and only we know how bad he dealt with that!!

he tries to take your feelings and mental state into consideration, but his brain might be a little foggy with slight panic and confusion

"dude, have you told anyone about this? i think you should get some help." again, it's a little difficult for him to find soothing words, and talks bluntly

he encourages you to find help, and tells you he cares, albeit awkwardly. he does care, but he isn't great with feelings. he just really doesn't like the idea of you doing something like that

afterwards, he'll try to be more conscious of you and your state. he might get a little frustrated sometimes, especially if you find yourself in an episode or relapsing. he isn't angry at you, he's just confused on why and lets it turn into anger

he feels angry that you're hurting like that, and kyle being the problem solver he is, sometimes lets his logical and moral side take over. he might ask stan to help out if he can't calm you down

he's trying!!!

ERIC CARTMAN

i wouldn't be surprised if eric has used self-harm in one of his faking suicide schemes

just as most serious topics, the most he probably knows is from researching online for said schemes and lies. most of the time it's a quick scan of the surface web, but he goes deeper for certain things

he probably laughs it off at first or makes fun of you if you were to tell it to him straight

but if he were to actually witness you in the act, he probably panics but tries not to show it

"dammit, Y/N, are you rubbing one out or what, c'mon we gotta-" he pauses when he sees you, and doesn't know what to do from there

like stan he's probably curious and might ask if it hurts or like idk what you use for it😭 he kinda wants to talk to you about it but beats around the bush to avoid the direct topic

he probably tells his mom to get a med-kit and gives it to you and walks out

he felt a whole lot of tension and pressure in that room and he was not rockin with it, so he makes his escape. he doesn't even know why he was panicking that much, probably because you could cut the pressure in that room with a knife kinda like how u cu

my legal team has advised me not to continue this joke

the next day at school he might crack a few emo jokes with you, but other than that he doesn't ask what's wrong or anything.

afterwards, he doesn't really treat you differently, but he doesn't bring it up at all. in fact, you expect him to bring it up during an argument to hit your weak point, but he doesn't.

you're sure he wants to though. but, he doesn't. and that's what counts, right? you can't help but notice that he's a bit more gentle with his touches, specifically when he's grabbing your hand or arm. and who knows, maybe he'll give you the part of his lunch he doesn't want. don't count on it though.

KENNY MCCORMICK

i can see kenny maybe being the most understanding of the four, specifically about the stress and how it relieves it

he's still a little lost, as he's never felt the urge to do that when he's stressed out. also because he dies in so many painful ways that he doesn't know why someone would willingly cause pain to themselves??

but he definitely understands more if you explain it, and sit and listens to you if you'd like to talk about your troubles.

"mm mph mmph mmph? mm mmmph, mph mmph" (can i take it? the blade, i mean)"

he doesn't want to like. be weird or anything he just feels really wrong letting you walk off with a sharp blade ready to slice ur skin. like if he saw fresh wounds the next day he'd probably feel really bad he didn't take it

kenny doesn't tell anyone and doesn't make it a big deal. he'll encourage you and pat you on the back, or sling an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into a hug and telling you that you can do it!

he's generally more nicer and defends you if cartman is annoying you about something, telling him to buzz off

he does have to admit, he gets a little worried about you sometimes so he might just check on you in his mysterion persona from outside your window.

considering you play superheros with the gang, he doesn't really have to wear the costume to protect his identity. it just makes him feel like less of a creep if he's dressed up like batman and pretending to protect the city at night

(the suit also helps him blend in with the shadows. except the bright white undies and green question mark that boings as he walks. okay maybe it isn't great for hiding in the shadows)

#south park #south park x reader #stan marsh x reader #kyle broflovski x reader #eric cartman x reader #kenny mccormick x reader #sp headcanons #south park x self harm reader #south park headcanons #south park fandom #sp fandom #sp x reader #stan sp #kyle sp #eric sp #kenny sp #cartman sp #stan marsh #kyle broflovski #eric cartman #kenny mccormick #pineappleciders

[indigoraysoflight]

Be Strong, Dear Caryler.

Hi there, fellow Caryler.

The fandom is a CRAAAZY place right now. Everything feels chaotic and uncomfortable. You want to be excited but things feel uncertain. Perhaps you open your social media to find some good news but end up feeling confused, anxious, and frustrated. Maybe it doesn't even feel worth chasing the Caryl dream. S2 can't get here quickly enough, so you can see Caryl together again.

I hear you. I'm in the same place so I completely get it. No one can deny that last year was traumatizing in many ways. I'm sure you have feelings about it and your own way of dealing with those feelings.

If you're excited about the spinoff because you adore Daryl and want to see what happens before Carol gets there – that's valid. I hope you find what you're looking for from S1. If you're sad, hurt, and overall frustrated with the way things went down last year (and are dreading the possible ship baiting in S1), you're allowed to feel that way. Maybe you're conflicted and don't know where you stand. That's okay too.

YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID. No matter what they are.

This is where I stand: AMC made it "untenable" for Melissa McBride to be in the spinoff because they moved it to France. AMC and other co-workers spoke on Melissa's behalf, but I only believe what she said (and/or didn't say). She decided to come back to us for S2. I trust her judgement and know she would only agree to what's best for herself and her character in S2. I think AMC still has a final say on things like the title, which is sad because her character deserves to be on it. So far, everything about S1 has made me anxious, so I am withholding my view. I only intend to tune in when I see my dealbreakers. I will watch S2 to support Melissa and Caryl.

We may or may not share the same perspective about what happened with the Caryl spinoff, the current spinoff, or last year's disaster – but I respect yours.

Please take care of yourself. This fandom can sometimes make you feel isolated and lonely – especially if you meet people you're not aligned with. I was fortunate to meet people in the fandom a few months ago (when I felt so alone, I was ready to quit) who were kind and supportive. They honoured my feelings and opinions regarding the show. That helped me honour and accept my own feelings about it – the good, bad and the ugly.

If you ever want some clarity, want someone to geek out about Caryl with or just need to chat with someone in the fandom, my ask box is open. I'll do my best to respond and talk to you.

Please remember that your mental health is the top priority. If you're struggling, please reach out to someone in your support system or get help. (Here's a directory of mental health crisis numbers)

We're all in this together. Caryl will always be endgame.

#caryl spinoff #melissa mcbride #darylneedscaryl #darylneedscarol #about this blog #caryl solidarity #caryl #carol x daryl #daryl x carol

[marshmallowprotection]

Can you please write a one shot on vet yoosung having to deal with a patient like this guy

"Dr. Kim, you should be warned, the patient today was listed as a bite warning."

"I'm sure we can handle him. He might just be anxious at the vet. It's no problem! I'll take it at his pace so he doesn't feel crowded. I'd hate to feel cornered when I don't feel good and I can't communicate why that is, too! Is it the mastiff from last time? He wasn't as bad as they'd claimed, you know! He just needed some belly rubs before he turned to butter."

"Dr. Kim, I'm starting to wonder if you're afraid of any animal at all!"

Yoosung chuckled. "No, no. Of course not. I don't have anything to be afraid of! Animals can sense your anxiety, you know. That's one of the first things I learned before I even got far into my studies. If you're as calm as you can be, they'll feel better about trusting you. It isn't clear cut and perfect, but it does make a difference in my experience."

"You might be surprised with this guy."

"C'mon, how bad can he be?"

The nurse nodded and went to wet the patient from the waiting room. It wasn't long before she turned with a crate that was filled with the howling and growling of a dog. Yoosung noticed that the nurse was wary, trembling as she went to the unlock the crate and free the beast from his cage, but he offered her his hands.

She took that offer in an instant and took a step back so he could do it.

A fraction of a second later, a Chihuahua burst out of the crate and began to bark at him in incredulous speed. He didn’t seem happy to be at the vet, that was for sure, but the rate at which his body was shaking was bound to make anyone assume he was filled with rage the likes of which no human had ever seen. 

Yoosung knew what most people assumed when they saw a yapping Chihuahua. They expected to see a dog that wouldn't stop trembling or howling in disgust. Frankly, a quick Noogle search would tell them that the reason why their dog was responding the way it was because they were overstimulated, overwhelmed, or cold.

They weren't filled with anger nine times out of ten.

He knew these animals weren't filled with rage, and it was sad that most people were afraid of them for that reason. He had to imagine that it would be frustrating to be a small dog, constantly poked and prodded as if you were nothing more than a toy, and anyone would angry after being treated that away—even if you didn't want to be. 

The Chihuahua yipped at him but Yoosung was patient. He took a seat in front of the dog and kept his hands to himself, seeing how long it might take his patient to get the barks out of his system with the space to do what he needed to do. He knew that wouldn't be all the comfort the dog needed to feel better, but it was a start, and he wasn't the type to rush an appointment if it wasn't an emergency to start with!

"Hey there," his voice was gentle as the dog continued to shake and tremble. "We've got plenty of time to figure out what's wrong, little guy. I won't poke and prod you until you establish your comfort level. I don't like going to the doctor, either, but the least I can do is make the trip less cold."

The growls continued. 

This wasn't his first rodeo with an animal that wasn't comfortable. But, this was assuredly the first time he interacted with a tiny dog that clearly hadn't had its boundaries respected. He knew what that felt like... and it wasn't fun to have his buttons pressed until he felt cornered!

Undeterred, Yoosung continued, "I would give you treats to help you feel a little more comfortable, but for us to run the test today, you can't have anything to eat. But, I promise if you let me take care of the scan, I'll give you something fresh to eat. Your owner said we could do anything to make sure it was comfortable for you if we could and I bet a plate of chicken will do the trick, huh, little guy?"

Quietly, he offered his hand to the Chihuahua. Most people would have expected the dog to bite them on impact, but he didn't let any fear show on his face. "Don't worry, I won't grab you without asking first."

He was somebody who took care of animals for a living, and he knew that showing fear over a bite or a scratch wasn't worth it. He could take it, and he would rather take it if it meant they trusted him fully instead of feeling like nobody listened to them. It took a moment, but the dog sniffed his hands, and the growling suddenly subsided with it. 

A smile appeared on Yoosung face as he let the dog nuzzle its face against his hand. "There we go, that's much better, huh? Let's get you taken care of so you can go home and eat to your hearts content all night long, hm?"

"Dr. Kim... how did you do that...?"

"Simple! I let them decide that I'm trustworthy on their own before I go poking around. They're just like you or me, you know? That's what I told you before. Patience helps."

#mod kait #ask #mystic messenger #mysme #mysticmessenger #mm #yoosung kim #kim yoosung #drabble #crybabysunflower

[saintsir4n]

7. FALLING

thank you for the support

WARNINGS: MENTIONS OF MENTAL HEALTH

"DON'T tell me you're fallin' in love, it's been what, a couple of weeks?"

"I am, he gets me you know," Carson gushed, speaking quietly to Keelie. "Sounds like bullshit I know, but word to God, I'm serious."

Fortunately, the nail salon wasn't busy so only five other people were being tended to.

Keelie huffed out a laugh, "The dick that good?"

"It's the best," Brian was probably the best she ever had. It was only two days since their date and they couldn't stop, he caught her whenever and wherever.

All the time she spent with him, she noticed a lot. He was quite jumpy, and anxious, especially when it came to his phone. Very cagy about his past and she knew to respect that even though it drove her to overthink.

"White boy got it like that?" Keelie was shocked, she'd never seen her friend act so enamoured about a guy.

In the past, Carson was very naive, and way too trusting, so she hoped that history wasn't repeating itself.

Carson giggled, "He really does. Girl, he talks me through it."

Keelie instantly choked on air, "He what?"

"You heard me."

"He's vocal?" Keelie lowered her tone, making sure the customers couldn't hear much to their disappointment. Carson nodded in response. "Damn."

"Voice husky and everythin', he puts it down, lifts me up, keeps me hooked even if he's just starin', he knows he's got some sort of power over me. Drive's me crazy, I swear.”

“He’s packin’ right? He has to be with that shit eatin’ grin.”

“Respect me, I wouldn’t settle for no little dick,” Carson’s response had them both snickering.

The friends abruptly looked up when the shop bell rang and Brian walked in, eyes immediately landing on Carson.

"Ladies," he nodded at a few of them as he walked by, greeted Keelie before leaning over the counter and pressing a few kisses to Carson's lips making the customers awww in the background. Keelie moved away to help them. "You good baby?" she nodded, noting the irritation in his eyes, but before she could say anything he asked, "You get your nails done?" she nodded again, showing them off to him. He pulled out a 50-dollar bill and put it next to her.

She looked shocked, "You don't have to."

"I want to," Brian insisted, still not smiling.

He's annoyed, she realised.

"You ready to go, your shift is done right?" Brian questioned.

"It's done," she replied, "I'll go get my stuff."

He nodded, watching her go into the back, then sighing when he heard Keelie's voice.

"I'm watchin' you," she warned, walking passed.

He snapped his head, looking in her direction as she picked up a new electric file, "I didn't do nothin'."

"Tell that to my third eye," Keelie took note of his annoyance, wondering why he was so worked up.

Brain didn't respond.

Carson came back, with her bag in hand and immediately saw how riled he was.

"Yo, Keke what did you say to him?" she asked, coming up to Brian who put his arm around her.

"Nothin', I only said hi. Didn't I Eminem?" Keelie taunted, sitting down in front of a regular.

"Yeah, Lil' Kim's right," Brian jabbed, making the whole store laugh.

Even Carson smiled, sticking her tongue out at Keelie who flipped him off.

Brian whispered something as they walked out and onto the street, "Come on, I gotta show you somethin' before we meet the team."

"What is it?" she wondered.

His ringtone disrupted his response. He pulled out his phone, keeping it close to his chest and ignored the ring.

She squinted at him, "Brian?"

His phone started to ring again, just as they reached his truck.

"Is that your mom or somethin'?" she pressed.

"What? No, it's just..." he trailed off, annoyed by the constant ringing and switched off his phone, but that only irritated Carson more.

She shrugged off his arm, "Do you have some secret life you're not tellin' me about Brian?" she was frustrated and he hated that he was making her feel that way. "Do you have a wife, kids, some white picket fence?"

He tried taking her hand but she didn't let him, "Baby, calm down, it's nothin'."

"Then why do you look tense?"

"Because you questionin' me alright? Nothing's wrong, I'm good, you good?" he didn't mean to snap at her. He'd never done it before.

Carson took a step back, looking him up and down. Why's he acting like this? her annoyed gaze settled on something she hadn't noticed before.

"Yo, what happened to your hand?"

It was red and slightly blotchy.

Brain flexed his fist and shook his head, "It's nothin'."

"Was it Vince, did you get in the ring with him again or somethin'?" she was met with silence, "Just answer the question."

"I just did," he breathed out. "Trust me, I'm tense 'cause everythin' is on top of me at the moment. I have bad days and good days like everyone else"

She had to ask, "And your phone?"

"It's Harry," he rushed out, "I left my shift early to come and see you, to spend to with you."

"Okay," she didn't have anything else to say.

He groaned, "Don't be like that, lemme show you want I got you."

Carson just nodded, watching him unlock the truck and pull open the passenger seat, retrieving the present he got for her.

She gasped when she saw the jewel-encrusted sunshine ornament. She remembered telling him about it on their date but she didn't think he was listening.

"Y-you... how?"

"I kept an eye out," he carefully placed it in her hands. "Just wanted to make you happy."

It cost nothing, but it meant everything.

She clutched it tightly, smiling so hard her cheeks hurt.

"Thank you, baby."

And it was like everything was forgotten.

So Brian smiled and embraced her tightly, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"Let's get outta here."

__

The next day Carson squealed when she saw her car, more importantly, the engine that looked like it cost 15k. Jesse even claimed to have tweaked a few things, things she didn't notice before. She couldn't believe it. Her flashy rims, the turbine, and the compressor were fixed and the stereo was finally working again too.

"Like it?" Jesse asked with a proud smirk.

"Like it? you did this before street wars and whilst you were fixing the Supra?" she gawked, eyes blinking rapidly at the shiny parts.

He sheepishly shrugged, "Had to do it for you. The rims were the easiest to do. The engine took some time but it was nothin'. Speakers are all set. Check them out, you'll love it, drivin' down sunset blarin' them to the car Gods."

She laid a fat kiss on his cheek and hugged him.

"I love you, you know that? The biggest, bestest and brightest," she listed, beaming at the car.

"I love you too, now lemme get back to the Supra. Go paint your Charger, I know the designs will be sick."

Jesse left her to her own devices. Carson put down the hood, then reached into her pocket to add the last addition.

She slid into the front seat, slid off the plastic and placed the sunshine ornament on the dashboard, it stuck very easily.

"I hope you love it, Dad," she whispered, wishing he was here.

After a moment she jumped out, blew a kiss at the car and walked around the garage, finding the paint she was going to use for the designs, then pulled out her sketchbook and some overalls to protect her fit. She got lost in her own world when she started, everything was going to plan.

She felt so blessed.

So what could go wrong?

She heard some of the guys talking from the distance but she didn't pay much attention.

She barely flinched when she felt someone kneel behind her and wrap an arm around her shoulder pausing her painting.

"Hey blondie," she greeted him as he kissed her cheek.

"Looking good," Brian nodded to the design. Every time he saw her work, whether it was in her sketchbook or some other street racer's car, it made him wonder why she never did this professionally, just like Jesse. Art school or engineering.

She leaned into his hold, "Thank you."

They talked for a while, she asked if his hand was okay, but was told that it was nothing to worry about. He kept saying she would win any race she would enter and couldn't wait to see it happen, all while taking some pictures of them.

He had pictures of the pair of them all over his phone.

Pulling her from the ground, he cupped her face and pressed his lips to hers. The feeling coursing through their veins wasn't foreign anymore. They embraced it like a warm hug. It was light yet intense.

When she went to move away he squeezed her sides.

Carson's laughter caught Dom's attention and he stood by the entrance, but neither of them saw him yet.

"Check it," Brian tried taking the paintbrush from her but she ended up getting some of the excess paint on his shirt.

"That's what you get," she mused.

"Oh, that's what I get?" He wiped the rest of the paint on her overalls, earning a fierce glare.

Finally seeing a displeased Dom standing off to the side, Brian shifted back slightly.

"Need a cigarette," he murmured.

Carson's brows furrowed, "Didn't you say you quit?" damn he must be stressed.

"I have to make a parts run 'round Simi Valley for Harry," Brian dismissed her question, looking directly at Dom.

"Drive safe," The Torretto man said with indifference.

"Bye, Sonny," Brian breezed passed Dom, after kissing her goodbye.

Carson stood there awkwardly, Dom continued to stare at her, and she didn't understand why.

"I had a guy on the phone, said you hadn't finished his design yet," he expressed, breaking the silence.

"I'm on it."

"Are you, 'cause you seem distracted?" There was a lot of judgment in his tone.

She scoffed, "Get off my back. If I say I'll finish the design I'll finish the design," she put down the paintbrush and frowned, "Brian's not a distraction. I thought you liked him."

"Me likin' him got nothin' to do with anythin'. Just focus," he always said the same thing to both her and Mia. His sister for school and Carson for her occupation. He knew that his godsister was falling in love with the guy, they all did, it so was obvious. "You wanna win big at race wars right? Make sure you keep your head straight."

She huffed, "First Vince, then Brian, now you, must be somethin' in the water right? Why are you all in my grill? Just mind your business."

"You're my business. Always have been, always will!" he yelled, causing her to walk out of the garage in a huff, "And don't you forget that!"

__

Later that day, Carson stood proud, grinning at the finished product of her car, trying to forget all the stress and worries she felt. She was happy. I'm happy, she kept telling herself. The team congratulated her for creating such a beauty before leaving to go and see Dom and Brian drive off in the completed Supra.

She tried not to overthink. Everything was going to plan, right? But the feeling in her stomach was growing.

Carson wanted to ignore it but her dad always told her to listen to her gut.

The sun was fading and she knew it was time to get back to her shared apartment. Letty had dipped, Mia was studying, Vince and Leon were inside whilst Jesse with stuck in his head working on the computer.

In the corner of her eye, Carson caught the orange Supra pulling up the garage.

Brian and Dom were talking intently about something, she couldn't get a good read on either of them, with their shades being on but she was too tired to even try.

"Yo Summer, where's everyone?" Dom asked, noticing her furrowed brows. The garage was scarce and Jesse didn't look up at the sound of his voice.

Brian smiled as he walked over to her since she didn't look too happy and he instantly felt a sense of dread.

"Inside," was all she had to say, "I'm bouncin'," she went to move but Brian caught her keyless hand, "Yeah?" Dom left the pair alone and eventually, Jesse joined him, finally snapping out of his trance and wanting to badger him about the sweet ride. "I gotta go, Brian."

"Why don't I come with you?" He suggested, with a smirk playin' at his lips.

"Won't your Sylvanian family be blowin' up your cell?" He laughed but she was serious as hell. "I've got work in the mornin' you know?"

"I won't keep you up and my phone will stay on silent. I promise," he came closer, pulling off his shades and staring into her eyes. The sun's falling rays struck her iris' had it stirred something inside of him. "I just wanna hold you, Sonny," he whispered as she scrunched her nose, making him cup her chin and peck her lips a few times. "We'll get some beauty sleep together. Okay?"

His words were making her trip and fall over any gut feeling.

So she agreed, "Okay. But we're just gonna sleep," she warned him as he pulled open the driver seat, letting her get in before jogging over to the passenger side. He gently shut the door, eyes lighting up at the ornament on the dashboard. "Only sleepin'."

Brian nodded, watching her start the engine, "A good night's rest and my beautiful girl to hold onto, not a bad way to live," he said softly, earning the cheesiest smile from her, "That's all I want."

"And that's what you've got."

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

a/n:

https://pin.it/1s5Uvmk (how i imagine her car to look, obviously with huge bratz doll silhouettes across the sides) it's funny because her street name at this point is "barbie" but that won't stop her from doing what she wants. and what's cute is brian's street name is "bullit" so we've got bullit and barbie.

https://pin.it/1c7m5sX (how i imagine the sunshine ornament to be but without the moon). in the behind the scenes videos of this film, the director wanted no rearview mirrors in the car, because he wanted it to be as accurate to the street racing culture of the time, so carson doesn't have one. so just imagine the gift sticking to the dashboard. 

some more angst in this chapter between brian and carson. the way he caught an attitude with our girl was disrespectful but of course, all it took was a gift to calm her down. it's sad i know but it's all part of the build-up. carson loves love and even though she knows something is up she'll tell herself to be delusional for a little longer and let him "hold her".

i've been getting a few messages about how often i update but it states multiple times that i publish every sunday (even check the first few chapters pls!)

also with the mature scenes that i write, pls prevent yourself from saying "robbed" or "call 911". what i write should be enough and it gets annoying when i see things like that. as stated in my bio, don't comment on any of my stories if you're a minor!

-

#wattpad #fanfic #black reader #fastandfurious #fast and the furious #brian o’conner x carson baker #carsonbaker #brian and sonny #sonnybaker #brianoconnerfanfic #brian o’conner x black!reader #brian o'conner #y2k #2001 #black racer #stereo love

[reasonsmandy]

You're the most beautiful flower

Daisy Jones x Fem!Reader

✧.* requested by anon — i really liked the prompt list for requests so maybe something angsty with 8 and 31?

✧.* summary — You never had a passion for working at bar you worked, but when you met Daisy Jones, she made all your shifts worthwhile.

✧.* warnings — Mention of anxiety and trauma.

✧.* word count — 2.6k

✧.* 🎙️ — Daisy's masterlist

✧.* mandy's notes — my first time writing for Daisy and I just fell in love... Hope you enjoy it 🫶🏾

Your job wasn't the most pleasant, and honestly you were there just to save enough money to continue following your plans in the city of LA. Dealing with drunks late into the night wasn't easy, but you had to keep up so that's where you spent most of your nights.

The bar was dimly lit, with a distinct smell of stale beer and cigarette smoke that lingered in the air. You could hear the sound of glasses clinking and the faint hum of the jukebox in the background, punctuated by occasional bursts of laughter or shouting. You had been working the late shift for hours, and your feet were sore from standing on them all night. You leaned on one hand on the counter, blinking for a long time, trying your best to keep yourself awake. Most of your colleagues had already left and finished their work, now you were waiting alone for some living soul to show up.

The bell above the bar door makes you wake up from your nap, a woman with red hair enters the place, capturing your attention. You had never seen such a beautiful woman, she smiles when she notices you at the counter and you smile back at her. She approaches you without taking that smile off her face, when she gets closer you can see those green eyes better and when you receive that deep look on you, butterflies in your stomach grow.

"Hey there," she says, her voice low and husky. "Mind if I sit here for a bit?"

You shake your head, feeling a rush of excitement and nervousness. This woman was different from anyone you had ever met before, and you couldn't help but be drawn to her.

She leans against the counter and pulls a cigarette pack out of her pocket, offering it to you. "Want one?"

You hesitate for a moment, then shake your head again. "Can't do that working."

She shrugs and brings one of the cigarettes to her mouth, lighting it. "Fair enough. I'm Daisy, by the way. Nice to meet you."

"Y/N" you say, your heart beating a little faster as you take in her striking features. You couldn't help but feel a little starstruck - this woman seemed like she was from another world.

…

There were a few hours left for you to open, so you needed to organize the bar so that it was perfect until that moment. The place was illuminated by the rays of sunlight that remained in the sky, these rays directly illuminated the stage where Daisy was lying with her notebook, the sunlight made her look more beautiful, and you didn't even know that was possible.

Daisy felt that she needed to impress Teddy Price anyway, she spent days and nights writing several different lyrics but nothing ever pleased her. Again she crumples up another sheet of paper, frustrated she throws it on the floor huffing, making you laugh.

"You find it funny, uh?" Daisy rolls her eyes with a smile on her face. "It's frustrating, Y/N I can't write anything decent!"

"I'm sure you're overreacting, your lyrics are great." You approach her, taking a seat next to her.

Daisy follows you with her eyes, lying in your lap when you sit down, still looking upset about her writer's block.

"Alright alright, let me see it." You extend your hand, asking permission to take the notebook.

Daisy looks anxious, as if giving you this notebook makes her extremely vulnerable. You take note of her unease and try to reassure her.

"Hey, it's okay," you say gently. "I won't judge you or anything. You can trust me."

You shifted your gaze between the letters in front of you and the woman's face. Watching you with her most valuable object the redhead felt fear, flashbacks of such bad times where she was constantly invalidated sinking her like a tsunami, restless she sits biting her fingernails nervously waiting for your words.

No matter how hard she tried to pretend that she didn't care, that she was indifferent to anyone's opinion, she always looked for that validation, that feeling of finally having done something deserving of recognition.

"So?" Daisy kept moving her hands, tapping her pencil against the stage floor. "Damn Y/N, speak up!"

You look up from the notebook and see that Daisy is practically trembling with anticipation. You can see how much this means to her, how much she craves validation.

"This is amazing," you say, smiling warmly at her. "Truly. You're an incredible writer, Daisy. You should be proud of yourself."

As you speak, you see Daisy's anxiety start to melt away. She looks relieved, grateful, and a little bit amazed.

"Really?" she whispers, looking almost stunned.

"Really," you say firmly. "I'm not just saying that. Your talent is undeniable."

Now that you observed her better, perfectly analyzing every detail of her face you could see that your words had an impact on her, her eyes filled with tears and some even escaped her eyes.

"Hey princess, why are you crying?" You can't help the instinct to take her hands in yours.

"Nothing is that..." She quickly wipes her tears away with her right hand, keeping the other in yours. "I'm not used to that."

She held your hands again, she didn't need to say much, you knew perfectly what it was like not to be understood, and she finally after so long felt safe around someone. She takes her gaze down to your clasped hands, smiling at your touch.

"You're amazing." You reaffirm.

As you hold Daisy's hands and tell her how amazing she is, you can feel a shift in the air between you. There's a tension there, a connection that you can't quite put your finger on.

Suddenly, without warning, Daisy leans forward and presses her lips to yours. It's a soft, gentle kiss, but it's filled with a raw emotion that you can't ignore. For a moment, you're frozen, unsure of how to react.

"Daisy..." you say softly, unsure of what to say next.

"I'm sorry," she says quickly, her cheeks flushing pink. "I shouldn't have done that. I just...I don't know what came over me."

"It's okay," you say gently, reaching out to take her hand. "It's okay. You don't have to apologize."

Daisy looks relieved at your words, but there's still a hint of uncertainty in her eyes.

"I'm just...I'm not sure what I'm feeling," she admits, looking down at her lap. "I've never felt this way before."

"That's okay," you say, your heart going out to her. "It's okay to feel unsure. And it's okay to take things slow. We can figure this out together."

Daisy nods, her eyes meeting yours again.

"Thank you," she whispers. "Thank you for being understanding."

"Always," you say, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. "Always."

You are dispersed from your conversation by the sound of the bell above the door, you both drop each other's hands in fright, taking your gaze to the door. You turn to Daisy and wink, getting up to attend to the customer, she smiles back at you, opening her notebook once again to try one more time. If her lyrics had made that smile appear on your face, she would make the best song in the whole fucking world just to see it again.

…

Since that kiss happened you can't get it out of your mind, all you could think about was Daisy, and when you weren't thinking about her you were thinking about her talented voice, or the way her eyes sparkled every time she had a new idea for lyrics, you couldn't stop thinking how I felt to be by her side the way you felt complete having her hands on yours. The Way she made you feel complete.

And with that the thought of having her away came, since the kiss she had been distant, she almost never came to the bar and when she did she was completely high. You knew how it was to be confused like that, you've been there before, but although you knew that she needed her time you felt so frustrated.

You cleaned the bar tables for the second time, trying to occupy your head and not think about her again, but it wasn't working… everything you looked at reminded you of her, the stage, the chairs, the drinks. That was her safe haven with you, being there together had become a routine and one you missed now that she didn't show up anymore.

You felt like you were in the dark. Not hearing from her for so long was torturous. You had tried looking for her at the apartment, but she weren't living there anymore. You couldn't help but think that she didn't care. It was a feeling you knew all too well, but it didn't make it any easier to bear.

The dialogues on your mind are interrupted by the sound of a phone ringing in the place, you went towards the device. You answer the establishment's phone as you always do, holding it so you don't yawn from tiredness.

"Miss Daisy Jones gave us that number." The voice on the other end of the line says, making you feel butterflies in your stomach hearing that name. "She is in jail and needs someone to come get her, she gave us the name of a woman called Y/N. Is this the right number?"

"Fucking hell Daisy…" You whisper, soon asking for the address of the place to meet her.

…

You told your boss that due to an emergency you needed to leave early, he said you would have to make up that time tomorrow. And even though you hated having to pay hours, the only thing that crossed your mind was what the fuck had happened to Daisy.

You run towards the police station and after some time solving what was necessary you can see her. She looked a mess, and it squeezed your heart, she had a band around her wrist that made you frown in question.

Daisy leaves the cell with tears in her eyes, you knew it was time to be there to help your flower. Immediately you hug her, missing having her around, feeling her touch.

She doesn't say anything right away, just escorts you out to your car, as soon as you're both inside she can't hold back her tears and breaks down. You turn to her, pulling her close to you, stroking her hair as she lets it all out.

"It's okay pretty girl, it's okay." You whisper, kissing the top of her head.

Once she's calmed down, you take her face in your hands.

"What's going on?" you ask worriedly. "You disappeared…"

Daisy shifts her gaze forward, and you let her shrug off your touch. You feel a tightness in your chest. Seeing someone you love so much in this condition breaks your heart.

"I'm trying to understand…" you let out with a sigh.

"I'm a mess Y/N" Daisy says after a long time. "And I don't want to bring you into my mess, you know?"

You turn to her with concern in your eyes, letting her know you were there to listen. She looked so exhausted, like she was dealing with a whirlwind of things at once.

"Ever since that happened I can't stop thinking about you." She confesses, and your heart misses a beat. "And I tried, I swear I tried to forget it all in every possible way. But how could I ever really let go of you? You're the most addictive drug I've ever tasted, And look, I have experience a lot."

You can't contain your laughter at her joke, she laughs along with you still looking at the horizon.

"I'm sorry for disappearing, I don't know how to deal with my feelings." She seemed to be having a lot of trouble opening up to you. "I just know that I can't get you out of my head, and I have no idea how to deal with this, this has never happened to me before… And I really care about you Y/N, I'm so afraid of fucking this up"

She finally takes the courage to look into your eyes, she smiles, and fuck... How you missed seeing that smile, involuntarily you smile back at her.

"Daisy…" You say tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I haven't stopped thinking about you for a second, and I understand your fears, I feel them too. I tried to pretend that your absence doesn't affect me, that I didn't miss you every day, that I didn't feel a tightness in my chest when I saw the hours passing by and you didn't walk through the door of that shitty bar, but I couldn't... I can't pretend that I'm not in love with you, so, I hope you know I won't give up on you."

After some time, Daisy wipes her tears and looks at you with a shy smile.

"Can we get away for the weekend?" she asks. "I need to clear my head, and I want to catch up with you."

You nod without hesitation, feeling a surge of excitement and anticipation. You don't know where you're going or what you're going to do, but you trust Daisy completely, and you know it will be an adventure.

The next day, you hit the road with a backpack and the radio played all the hit songs. The wind in your hair, the sun on your face, and the promise of freedom and fun ahead of you make you feel alive like never before.

As you drive, Daisy tells you about her life now with The Six, how she's been writing songs like never before and how excited she is to go on tour. You listen with awe and admiration, marveling at her talent and resilience. She also updates you on the other band members, how they're doing, and telling you how each one of them are.

"I miss them actually," she admits. "But I can't go back, not now. I need to clear my head, be alone with you, if that makes any sense." She laughs, and you hold her hand.

You nod in agreement, feeling a pang of empathy and pride. You know how hard it is to follow your dreams, especially when they take you away from the people you love.

When you reach your destination, a cozy cabin in the woods, you're greeted by a breathtaking view of the mountains and the lake. You and Daisy unpack, make a fire, and cook some simple but delicious food. You talk, laugh, and dance to the music, feeling carefree and happy.

As the night falls, you lie down on a blanket outside, watching the stars and the moon. Daisy snuggles close to you, resting her head on your shoulder. You wrap your arm around her, feeling her warmth and softness. You don't say anything, but you don't need to. The silence is filled with the sound of your breathing, the beating of your hearts, and the rustling of the leaves.

This is what it means to be alive, you think. To be with someone you love, to feel the beauty of nature, to be free from the worries and pressures of the world.

You turn to Daisy calling her attention to you, she takes your face between her hands and kisses you, a calm, slow and gentle kiss that carries the love that between you only grew. You rest your forehead on hers, still keeping your eyes closed, feeling every sensation that this woman gave you, afraid that this paradise will slip out of your hands.

"You're the most beautiful flower." You say smiling, kissing her again.

Daisy smiled between the kiss, feeling butterflies dance in her stomach, finally being with the one she loved was the best feeling in the world.

...

Hi, I hope you enjoyed it... If you wanted to ask for something my requests are open, and if you want to ask and don't have any ideas check out my prompt list :) xoxo

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