#i'm suffering what the hell

[alexoreality]

You might not have to hear this but some one piece ships literally don't make sense that it gives me the ick 🥲 (some ships i just respect and leave alone, i'll color them in blue.) (And the ones that give me severe trust issues is purple)

AceSan - ...okay... The smirk...? What else...? Trauma bonding?? What...? I mean, its cute, i can leave the ship alone and its fans. I think this ship stemmed from the way Ace was drawn looking at Sanji *my boy was greasy* Y'all are horny though.- (sorry. But they'll get along so well with supporting and stuff- TRAUMA. MY GUY. I KNOW IT WHEN I SEE IT 😭

HanLu - thats a grown ass woman.

LawLu - and thats a grown ass man. (But Luffy's 19- AGE GAP???)

ZoSan - i'm sorry HUH. The two men that insult each other 24/7 were being shipped??? HUH. (But they respect each other- I KNOW THAT??? BUT GODDAMN THE FICS DON'T GET THEIR CHARACTER RIGHT 😭 ZoSan is a well-liked ship, but don't consider them canon and that they'll kiss after Zoro defeats Mihawk)

ZoBin - THAT IS HIS MOTHER FIGURE.

SaboSan - ...They never met 😶... and what if they do? Trauma bonding again?... Y'all I'm sorry but huh- how. Legitimately I'M SPEAKING RATIONALLY, HOW THE FUCK WOULD TWO PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE??? THAT WAY???

UGH ITS JUST A 2D CHARACTER!!

Well DAMN YOU WEREN'T TREATING THEM LIKE THAT WHEN I WAS DISSING THEM??

#coming from a aroace so... y'all might think my opinion doesn't matter #my friends don't usually talk about their love lives in front of me cuz of it #but i've shown support and interest in them #i am the coach. not the player #zosan is really popular cuz they look hot with each other #i won't use their tags cuz i'm scared of getting comments #acesan i'll have a respect for since they do seem to have a chance to hit it off #also Sanji would've fucking kicked him if he tried 😐 #I once liked LawLu but i saw the red flags of the ship in general #age gap and all that also Law is stressed 24/7 with Luffy what #HanLu is just Hancock's reaction to a person treating her like a person. #and some people arr delulu enough to believe they'll be canon #SABOSAN. THAT SHIT EXISTS. Its funny that ASL is shipped with sanji and its Luffy having none of it bUT PEOPLE take is SERIOUSLY #i'm suffering what the hell #guys make the ship make sense #what?? the two of them look hot? #you think Franky isn't hot??? #SABO NEVER MET SANJI AND SANJI LITERALLY ONLH HEARS OF SABO FROM THE OTHERS #“its an au” well okay i won't argue there since ITS AN AU.

[rustedhills]

Disney, releasing Wish: "so it's all about legacy--the new generation surpassing the old, overcoming the evils perpetuated by them, relinquishing singular power... and there's an old man in a tower, uh... animal sidekick, i guess..., ah... magic...?

Miyazaki, just out of frame, sledgehammer raised:

#the boy and the heron #not tagging wish 'cause i'm being a little acidic #this isn't to be negative in the slightest--I really respect both films--but it's interesting to see how visceral boy+H gets with its story #what evils have to be rejected and what they represent--and how characters and the world suffer from those evils--as well as how the whole #'rejecting' part goes. in terms of animation powerhouses discussing their legacies - disney and miyazaki both - I find it interesting that #one makes a pretty safe and nostalgic movie about imagination and dreams; the other is a long trudge through the land of the dead. #b+h is a hard watch - and a look at the legacy of a man questioning his whole purpose in the world - after his cultural touchstones #have long passed by. Mahito needs to understand his grief to keep living--but if he drowns in it he'll just continue the cannibalistic and #violent world of his granduncle. how the hell do you make art when the trauma of your entire life has colored it forever? How can anyone? #maybe after a while... it's time to detonate that damn tower and keep living. #this is to say #if you have enough money to make whatever you want #Make It Fucking Count

[chrisbangs]

#what tha hell #girl u r so fine ...... pleag marry me #i have been suffering from a compromised immmune system but i'm in love no matter what and isn't that the worst sickness of all 🤒🤒🤒 #i would rather have tonsillitis than be love sick yes that's what im saying

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

"Murder is Werewolves" - Batman

I don't got the SPOONS to do this thought train justice, I have seriously been trying to write this thing for MONTHS so just, idk, have this half baked skeletal outline of the essay I guess:

I don't believe that Batman's no-kill rule is primarily about rehabilitation or second chances.

His refusal to believe that Cassandra could have killed someone when she was eight years old because "how could a killer understand my commitment not to kill" is absolute fucking MOON LOGIC from a rehabilitationist standpoint. No jury on the planet would think for even a second that she could reasonably be held accountable for her actions in that situation! Her past cannot condemn her to being incapable of valuing human life under a rehabilitation centering framework. However, Batman's reasoning makes perfect sense if he believes that killing is a spiritually/morally corrupting act which permanently and fundamentally changes a person, and that corruption can never be fully undone.

Dick Grayson killing the Joker is treated both narratively and by Batman as an unequivocally WIN for the Joker. The Joker won by turning Nightwing into a killer. Note that this is during a comic in which the Joker transforming people was a major theme! Batman didn't revive the Joker because the Joker deserved to live; he revived the Joker to lift the burden on Dick.

His appeal to Stephanie when she tried to kill her dad is that she shouldn't ruin her own life. He gives no defense of Cluemaster's actual life. Granted this is a rhetorical strategy moment and should be taken with a generous pinch of salt, but it fits in the pattern.

When Jason becomes a willful killer, he essentially disowns him, never treats him with full trust ever again, and... Well, we can stop here for Bruce's sake. Bottom line is that his actions towards Jason do not lead me to believe that he thinks Jason can become a better person without having his autonomy taken from him, either partially or fully.

The Joker is, for better or worse, the ultimate symbol and vessel of pure, irredeemable evil in DC comics now. He hasn't been just another crook in a long time. He will never get better, he will only get worse. If you take it to be true that the Joker will not or can not rehabilitate, then there's no rehabilitationist argument against killing him.

Batman does not seem to consider it a possibly that he'll rehabilitate. Batman at several points seems to think that the Joker dying in a manner no one could have prevented would be good. Yet Batman fully believes that if he killed the Joker, he himself would become irredeemable.

Batman's own form of justice (putting people into the hospital and then prison) is fucking brutal and clearly not rehabilitative. He disrespects the most basic human rights of all criminals on a regular basis. It is genuinely really, really weird from a rehabilitationist standpoint that his only uncrossable line is killing... But it makes perfect sense if he cares more about not corrupting himself with the act of killing than the actual ethical results of any individual decision to kill or not kill.

In the real world cops are all bastards because they are too violent to criminals, even when that violence doesn't lead to death. Prison is a wildly evil thing to do to another human being, and you don't use it to steal away massive portions of a person's life if your goal is to rehabilitate them. In the comic world, Batman is said to be necessary because the corrupt cops are too nice to criminals and keep letting them out of jail. I don't know how to write a connector sentence there so like I hope you can see why this bothers me so damn much! That's just not forgiveness vibes there Batman!!

I want to make special note here of the transformative aspect. You don't simply commit a single act when you kill, no, you become a killer, like you might become a werewolf.

The narrative supports this a lot!

Why did Supes go evil during Injustice? He killed the Joker. Why did Bruce become the Batman Who Laughs? Bruce killed the Joker. Why was Jason Todd close to becoming a new Joker during Three Jokers? Because he killed people, to include the Joker.

Even if these notions of redemption being impossible aren't the whole of his reasoning (people never have only one reason for doing what they do) it is a distinct through-line pattern in his actions and reasoning, and it is directly at odds with notions of rehabilitation, redemption, and second chances.

So why does he give so many killers second chances?

Firstly because this doesn't apply to all versions of Batman. Some writers explicitly incorporate rehabilitation and forgiveness into his actions. You will be able to provide me with examples of this other through-line pattern if you go looking for them. The nature of comics is to be inconsistent.

Secondly the existence of that other pattern does not negate the existence of this one. People and characters are complex, and perfectly capable of holding two patterns of belief within themselves, even when they conflict to this degree. You can absolutely synthesize these two ideas into a single messy Batman philosophical vibescape.

Finally and most importantly to this essay: he has mercy on killers the same way that werewolf hunters sometimes have mercy on someone who is clearly struggling against their monsterous nature, especially if they were turned in exceptional circumstances or against their will. They understand that they are sick, damned beasts, cursed to always be fighting against themselves and the evil they harbor within. It is vitally kind to help them fight themselves by curtailing their autonomy in helpful ways and providing them with chances to do some good to make up for their eternal moral deficiency.

I think in many comics Batman views killers as lost souls. Battered and tormented monsters who must be pitied and given mercy wherever possible. (The connections to mental health, addiction, and rampant, horrifying ableism towards people struggling with both is unavoidable, but addressing it is sadly outside of the scope of this essay.)

Above all, the greatest care possible must be taken to never, ever let yourself become one of them, because once you have transformed the beast will forever be within you growing stronger.

To Batman, it is the most noble burden, the highest mercy, the most important commandment: Thou shalt suffer the monsters to live.

#batman #batman negative #batsalt #okay hopefully that will let peeps who don't wanna see me rant against bats avoid this? #i could write several books on the moral and ethical philosophies at play in the Batfam tbh #I'm like kinda mostly happy with this #pretty good for being slammed out in three hours while baking brownies #inspired muchly by my friend's talk about Batman acting in accordance with Presbyterian predestination #and how he is one of the most carceral of all superheroes #all people merely revealing through their actions what sort of person they already are #punishing them in the hopes they can suffer enough penance on earth to escape hell #how that can look like rehabilitation or redemption at a glance #but functions in a fundamentally different way #anyway hope this mess was an interesting read! #damian's tomfoolery

[kineticallyanywhere]

thinkin about how long these kids spend of their teen yes just trying not to die

#dndads #dungeons and daddies #dndads 2 #fanart #kineticallyart #they managed to make a scenario where like #these guys did something horrible #but i can't even say with even a shred of confidence that I wouldn't have done it too #sometimes you just want the suffering to end #and its one thing when its yourself suffering but its another when its also everyone you love #and ever will love #its a LOT #is what i'm saying #trolley problem from hell #and theres an argument that while they didn't build the tracks or tie the people down #they DID build the track switcher #nicks not included here not just because of them turning on him #but because when we saw him he had this air of like #he referred to his time with the guys and fighting the doodler as *having fun* #however much nick cared or cares about earth its not the only place he has #its not even the most important place he has #might be all fun and games to nick fighting evil monsters but his friends dont get to go back to a safe home at the end of the day #i dont dislike nick! #just #sideeyeing the HELL out of him #take your kid home with you to your other plane if youre so worried about him dude dont just tell your 14 year old to trust no one #and ditch his mom for a life on the road #like DUDE??? #anyway i want a graphic novel about these guys #anthony's written comic books before right??

[redvelvetwishtree]

Lmao you guys cannot "antisemitism" your way out of this anymore, that's old tactics which don't work anymore.

Can you also prepare a word for what's happening in Palestine? It's so enraging I can't put into words my anger and upset anymore.

#anti-abc xyz-phobic xyz-ist this that all these terms your guys use at your convenience but shut your eyes and ears when - #- when someone else is suffering #how you people bully the whole world into following your exact abd precise brand of political correctness #fuck off #I'm done tiptoeing on egg shells around western political correctness #none of you care about anything #except whatever suits you in the time #take all your wokeness away because it sure as hell does not help the rest of the world #you all are just like your politicians #everyone having delusions of being the most morally high and superior race on earth who can decide what is right or wornt9 #and how other people are supposed to express their opinions and talk about their tragedies and fckng genocides and ethnic cleansings #no one cares for your stupid lectures littered with such terms anymore #nothing matters when you actually see what is happening in places like Palestine #and i know some dumbass will take this post and turn its meaning around just like they always do #but i am so so angry at what's happening in Palestine snd then the reaction of pro-Israel people and western media and politicians #this was absolutely thr last straw for everything #palestine #free palestine #gaza #west bank

[scraemoo]

I cannot stand the thought of a team dying I can't I can't I can't I

#qsmp #qsmp purgatory #I'm on no stream but seeing the tumblr posts just wrecks my soul #WE'RE AT LOSS OF SOME EGGS AND PLAYERS ALREADY WE DON'T NEED MORE DEAD PEOPLE #but at the same time it's feeding so much angst fanfic and art ideas #oh oh imagine a scenario that came into my mind! #let's say if bolas wins the purgatory and gets to come back to Quesadilla Island #boy oh boy can you imagine Phil? no more seeing his favorite annoying french ally and friend Etoiles? no more code breakers? #no more Forever? #no more Missa? #hell. even Cellbit without Roier?? #it'll be a win but at what cost? it's a hollow victory #survived but without the friends they made along the way on their suffering #balling my eyes out

[hussyknee]

So. Anyone else feeling a little unhinged rn?

#I've had to double my anti depressants #good news is that it's working #bad news is I still can't stay off social media #I saw another dead baby and this time just felt glad she didn't have to suffer this hell anymore #I have never wanted to believe in God more #I'm really glad they do #they believe their children are with God with all their hearts and I've started to imagine that's true too #holding onto their faith when I have none because otherwise I'd go insane #hyperfixating on Gaza for 6 wks while my hyperempathy went utterly haywire #has my brain dead convinced I'm Arab or something #I feel very stupid and guilty about it #like what right have I to claim this grief #and yet it's still easier to focus on than what's going on in my own country #ever since the protests fell apart last year and everything we had such hope for got flushed down the toilet #I just completely shut down #couldn't stand re-engaging with the world anymore #nearly ran out of reasons to keep going entirely this year #then when Gaza happened #I couldn't do anything but watch and learn and disseminate info like my life depended on it #just like with the SL protests #but it galvanized me the same way #I feel like it's breaking me down the same way too #I see all these massive protests and people chaining themselves and lying on the roads and getting thrown around by cops #I always felt that white and Western people could never truly feel our pain and it's amazing to see I was wrong #I feel so much love and awe and gratitude for them #but hope keeps getting dimmer and I'm slipping into despair again #exactly like with the SL protests #I don't want to go through all that betrayal and heartbreak and depression again #nobody that's directly impacted by this knows I exist and all the terrible pain I carry doesn't make a damn bit of difference #so I'm just spiralling alone in my head to no purpose lol

[theoestofocs]

but the thing is, melanie hates jon because he is so very much like her.

they work in adjacent fields, they've got such similar temperaments - they both run straight for whatever supernatural horror they need to understand, they both suck at planning ahead (poisoned coffee, melanie?) and they both lash out as a primary defense mechanism - and jon wasn't qualified for his job, and martin's only "degree" was in paranormal psychology, so clearly the Institute was hiring from a broader pool than "qualified archivists." i can't imagine ghost studies are all that lucrative as a field. if melanie hadn't made it as a youtuber, what would she have done? we don't know a lot about her educational background but - she knows what it's like, to need to know. she walked into the Institute and got a job because Elias saw that he could use her.

If she'd had a legitimate encounter sooner, if she'd started her quest a few years early, if she'd come to the Institute to give her statement and stayed to use their library before Gertrude had died -

Or even if she just couldn't survive on a youtuber's salary, if she'd gone looking for job postings in relevant fields -

It could have been her. She looks at Jon, and she sees exactly who she could have been. It's only luck that it wasn't.

And that's the kicker, isn't it? It's luck, that she's in her shoes instead of Jon's.

And is she supposed to feel lucky? To feel thankful that she's had to suffer through attack after attack, Elias showing her how her father (her dad, who called her his little moth) died screaming, her body torn open by things that don't exist, her sense of self slipping as she ripped into flesh with no recognizable form, her trust violated as she woke up to two of the few remaining people who are supposed to be on her side cutting into her against her will - to feel lucky, because she had to gouge her eyes out just to have her body back in her control -

Is she supposed to be happy that she lived through all that? Is she supposed to be glad, just because she could have been Jon?

Nobody told Melanie she needed to feel sorry for Jon, or give him her sympathy, or any other kind of pity. She just wants to give it, because God, what he'd gone through -

(Thank God it wasn't her -)

- Fuck that, she isn't lucky.

She hates Jon, because she refuses to feel grateful for the horror show her life has been. (Because she's grateful, that it wasn't her; and she's furious, because - yes it was. she paid the price of the apocalypse in blood and scars and trauma, too. She wasn't Jon, and could have been - but fuck it, she was still Melanie. and the hell that she has lived through isn't nothing.)

It's just bad luck, that it was Jon of all people. It's just bad luck, that it was Melanie.

No one here is lucky.

#tma #the magnus archives #tma meta #melanie king #linden's originals #i just have a lot of Feelings ok #tangentially related but one of these days i'm gonna write the post abt basira #bc i love to joke abt jon relying on the local lesbians to make good decisions! it is very fun. but also #incredibly inaccurate. jon made bad decisions (mainly due to a dearth of information and a wealth of fear) #but he didn't make better decisions when he let the wlw take charge! #basira was the one who convinced(/coerced? definitely pressured but details beyond that are lacking) jon into performing surgery #on melanie's leg. left to his own devices idk what jon would have done but it sure as hell wouldn't have been #''roofie my coworker to perform nonconsensual surgery'' #if only bc that is Not something that would occur to him. & idc man it's a messy situation all around #there was no good choice there (there never was) but that? that wasn't the right one. and i think that's the other piece at play here #melanie didn't forgive him for that. i sure wouldn't. and she gets it - she does: there were no good choices - #but how is she supposed to care about the suffering that guy of all people went through? when it feels like it invalidates her own? #how are you supposed to feel about your reflection in a face that stars in all your nightmare memories? #melanie hates jon because he never gave her a reason to like him; and because he violated her (no matter how necessary it was); and #because she could have been him. because it's luck that it wasn't. #except there is no good luck in this world. not in this apocalypse - the one that's been going on for much longer for her - for them - #than since that final ritual. she's been living an apocalypse since she saw that monster in a hospital. and that matters too. #not one of them has been free in a long time. maybe ever #melanie can't pity him because feeling ''pity'' requires a level of distance she doesn't have #pity means ''there but for the grace of God go -'' but what grace? #there but for the grace of god go i? is she meant to thank someone for giving her the lot she got in life? #how is she supposed to feel glad about that? #she cannot pity him. and she cannot commiserate; those bridges have long since been burned. all that's left to feel #is a guilty kind of hatred and resentment. because in another life she might've been him; in another life still they might have been twins #linden in the tags

[birb--birb]

What kind of love are you?

Violet: Love as a Threshold

Your love does not ask for much. Your love does not take. Your love is free, and unquestioned, and here for wherever needs it. When you fall in love, it is as gentle as a breath in the night. It is quiet, and it is effortless. It is tender. If your love was a house, it would readily welcome all who come through. If your love was a hearth, it would warm the hands of whoever stopped by, whether for a day, a month, a year, or forever. When you fall for someone, it is without strings, without conditions, without need. You love for the sake of loving, for the sake of caring for those who need it. You love with a giver’s heart and a giver’s hands and are made so much stronger for it. Being loved by you is to always feel at home. Your love may not always be well-received by those unprepared to linger, but it is unforgettable all the same

The second I saw this answer for Violet I knew it was perfect. Their entire romance with Astarion was about patience. Waiting for him to realize that he's truly safe with them, that they doesn't expect anything from him, that he is in the lead here and they'll follow only when he's ready and okay. And waiting without judgement, Violet knows these things take time and they were more than willing to wait, to be there, to just sit and exist with him while he figures shit out. And when he truly let Violet in, I like to think it was like with a comforting sigh, the feeling of coming home, that feeling when all pressure is lifted and you can just *exist* without fear, without judgement.

Violet has seen violence and hatred and yet chooses to show up for those they love as a place of calm and stability, without judgement, without expectations. Violet's love is patient, it doesn't expect anything back but will give you everything just because we all deserve to feel warmth and safety. They feel so much warmth in their heart that they were able to help Astarion get to a place where he feels safe. I think even if they didn't fall in love or end up together, Violet would have still shown up for him in the same way. They know what suffering is like, they've gone through enough of it themselves and come out the other end alive. They know how much it hurts, but also how much easier it is with someone to lean on.

tagged by @cleric4vampire ty for enabling so many feelies about my bbys

Tagging: @justabiteofspite and @dragon--sage (I know yall were already tagged but doing so again for funzies cause I'd love to hear about your Tavs/Durges) and anyone who wants to join in, please do!!

#I kinda went off in the tags I'm so sorry (not really) #oc #Violet #Tav #astarion x tav #bg3 #I know this is about my astarion romance but I'm constantly thinking about violet and halsin also #how quiet and strong their love was #violet and halsins love would be like your parent tucking you into bed after you fell asleep on the couch watching late night tv #but they both knew a romantic relationship would be selfish #theres no way in hell violets monogamous dont get me wrong but they wanted and needed very different things #violet's warlock patron isnt like mizoura but they do have orders and a contract still #so i like to think they have this sadness of what could have been #but also joy for what they both have now especially after the epilogue party #the epilogue gave me so many feelies about them yall I cried #I remember going through Cazadors dungeon and just thinking about the absolute pain violet felt seeing how much astarion was suffering #they wanted to just protect him destroy everything burn it all down anything to make him stop hurting #but they knew he had to face this. and they didn't let him walk away from it #sometimes love is facing the hard things #sometimes its calling your sins by name #but the key is that patience again #you can't force someone to get over their trauma- recovery is not linear #and it doesn't make him any less worthy of love #boys got a lot to unlearn but violets not gonna push him away because of it #they're really fucking proud of him #and I know they're out there finding weirdo artifacts and exploring the shit outta faerun together #Astarion

[kindlythevoid]

Okay y'all, Valentine's Day is next week, and I'm feeling like writing something romantic.

#would appreciate the votes #any votes #i will write it if one (1) person votes #any runner ups gets an explanation if asked #some of you in the audience (aka stalking this blog) may be wondering where the hell arthurxgwen are #arthur and gwen need to be written in my Big Stories #and shall be written fret not #but I'm really hoping these stories that are not drabbles will only top at like 30.000 words ish #i feel like that's a respectable number #in any case #kiki needs to write #but suffers from “but what??? but what????” #i feel like i really put myself on blast by posting these #sorry guys I just love fusions #but also yeah i see the options too don't worry #self aware #just yelling into the void

[tenok]

.

#I want complaine not only about bad takes in this fandom but also about theories that just!! so!! stupid!! but also I'm a good person that #doesn't shit on other people's fun #so I mostly suffer in silence #and block people in bunches #'you see! this theory absolutely doesn't take agency from character and doesn't minimize emotional impact!' #says person about theory that roughly summariasized as 'Crowley AGAIN knows more than Aziraphale and it's all so SAD because if only #Aziraphale knew he wouldn't make this desicion!' #I want to scream #somehow it also never about what kind of monster Crowley would be to willingly hide memories Aziraphale supposedly erised and never gave it #back in whole four years they had before season two #like. maybe not be a cowards and embrace 'I was a pussy and somehow didn't get a courage to RESTORE MY FRIEND'S MEMORY with some kind of #VITAL INFORMATION that could've IMPACT HIS LIFE OR DEAT DESICIONS #and now he's in place where he could be abused erased or killed and IT'S MY FAULT' angle hmmm? #at least it could've made it interesting #but noooo #also how the fuck them kissing in 1941 should've impact Aziraphale's desicion anyway I can't get logic behind this theories #(the angle with 'memories are not about some stupid kiss but about what Crowley saw in heavens' could've work but like first: Crowley didn' #saw anything Aziraphale won't hear from Metatron in next scene or can extrapolate using base logic #and anyway if Crowley wanted to use it as argument he like. should've start with it and not with 'blah blah you're an idiot we should run #from earth' #AT BEST I could've get behind him giving Aziraphale some kind of weapon or possibility of safe out or like. hell's fire to self destruct as #last resort. but memories? and especially Aziraphale's memories??) #anyway yes it's me being a hater. I just have no place to vent about it but I sure hope that no one that likes this theories will see it. #you do you!!! but I hate it so much!!!

[angeltism]

platonic pining feels so damn weird

#➳ the fool speaks #like ohhhh look at meeeeee wanting to be friends w somebun sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo badly that it's kinda making me look stupid #i've never rlly felt this way . like any pining i've experienced . was romantic . but this #i think it's worse because i have the mindset (of which i am trying to get rid of) that romantic love > platonic love and therefore it's #like . ohh . look at uu . being all EMBARRASSING . over what . wanting somebun to be uur friend . over wanting to be close with someone #in a way that DOESN'T include mashing uur faces together to make out passionately ??????? lmao what the fuck #AND ISN'T FRIENDSHIP EASIER TO . MAKE HAPPEN IDK . THAN ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS ?????? i don't think i'm supposed to be thinking abt it THIS #much like . isn't it sooo easy to make friends. isn't it . aha . but here i am barely able to hold a convo but ig i'm just Like That eueueu #this is so WEIRD n uu can't rlly force such a strong platonic connection like . that isn't how that works that isn't how any relationship #works but like . it's like . EUHFHUIDHUFJBHSHDH ????????????????? i am SUFFERING oh my GOD what the HELL #it's so . like a crush . but it isn't . so my hyperro brain is CONFUSED and my lonely ass is STARVING for any kind of closeness this is so #WEIRD TO BE DEALING WITHHHHHHHH #god and how long have i been feeling like this #on and off for a few months #that might be longer than most crushes i've had too ? wow . what the ufck is this what is happening i am so confused i feel so WEIRD #unholy screeching ensues

[hard-times-paramore]

Dream is a kind person if you ignore the ex-girlfriend he trapped in hell.

#the sandman #not the youtuber #dream of the endless #no but srsly is he a villain? how tf does one redemption arc THAT? #either he's a villain forever rotten to the core or I'm really curious how they're gonna fix that #I'll be really pissed if he gets redeemed from that too easy. he has to suffer. #morpheus dream #TEN THOUSAND YEARS! IN HELL!!! AND HE JUST LEFT HER THERE AGAIN WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!

[miss-celestia13]

Sometimes, writing is fun and light and easy. It just happens and I trick myself into believing that it’ll always be that way.

Other times, writing is just me staring at the screen, screaming at it, begging it to write itself or asking the useless gods to grant me the brain cells to complete it because it’s broken me down.

I’m just. I can’t. I’ve had enough. I am not made for this life. I bit off more than I can chew and now it’s time to pay up, I am in severe debt. Fuck my life. Fuck the universe for telling me to be creative. Fuck me, fuck this story and fuck everything.

Okay, I’ve had my wee tantrum, now I can think again. This will be the death of me, but it will die first. If I’m going out, I’m taking something to hell with me. Lord knows, the devil might know some tricks to complete it. Plus I just like the idea of asking him; “Hi, would you like to proofread my smutty fanfiction?” I reckon he’d enjoy that, or he’d turn me to ash and I’ll finally be at peace 🤭

#writing is hell #writing is hard #writing thoughts #women writers #female writers #writing is pain #i am suffering #write what you want #I don’t want to write another word yet here I am still trying and wishing I could kill my past self for putting this on me #fanfic #fanfiction #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #fanfiction writer #writer things #i'm a wordy bitch #i am going insane #why do i do this to myself #writing is a process #not fun times #I can put fear in the devil #writing #writerslife #writing is haaaaaaaaard #my writing #creative writing #fanfic things #fanfic thoughts #fanfiction author #smut

[foxgirlmoth]

You ever just get hit hard as hell that you've felt trapped in your place of residence for years and years and you're just so tired from working the most shit jobs for a decade you just wanna scream.

#Yeag its so fun #Like. I feel like I've just pushed it back in my head going 'nono its not that bad it just feels that bad' #And then I realize everything from the way I dress and the way I relax is half faked because what else can I do but #Sit and be safe in the one room that feels even half like my space #I don't go out of this room! Its hell outside of it at my place. #Its filled with people who debate how I generally live and think my life isn't hard enough and so I deserve more suffering half the time #I'm making $20 an hour right now and it feels impossible to keep up three or so payments if I miss. day or two per check #I'm mostly venting rn but just holy shit #I think I'd actually put effort into putting clothes away or cleaning up my space or being just in any way shape or form nicer to myself #If I had any sense of belonging here #Its been almost 27 years of my life in this one room