#if not I will explain it in great detail if you would like

[icedbeverageenjoyer]

🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺🖤📺

🖤📺Mr. Puzzles' Fluff Alphabet!! 📺🖤

Hey guys!!! The moment I saw snakes-writing-corner's fluff alphabet I couldn't focus on any of my other stuff until I've made one on my own! It's surprisingly easier than the oneshots I'm used to-- but on with the fluff!!!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He is incredibly affectionate and always wants to pamper you with kisses and compliments! Though he only shows it when the cameras stop rolling and he's sure you two are alone.

His love language is words of affirmation, since there is no better way to express his love than saying it directly! You would think he'd eventually run out of things to compliment, but his vocabulary is vast and colourful, making you blush every time. He is also multilingual, so sometimes he'll sweettalk you in a different language only to fluster you.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend?) 

Since you are his partner (and thus, his only friend), you're already his best friend! But if you weren't dating he'd probably be just as chaotic. He will call you in the middle of the night and ask you for input on his scripts, oftentimes his voice doesn't get picked up clearly and you just hear garbled static with the occasional manic laughter.

Sometimes he'll just skip the phone entirely, break into your house, and put on a movie so you two could watch. If the sound of a door being kicked to the ground or the smell of perfectly cooked popcorn doesn't wake you up, him manhandling you and throwing you at the couch (not on, at) is sure to do the trick!

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He is not used to people touching him or vice versa. The only times in the puzzlevision arc where he touched someone were when he was threatening Mario or fighting the crew, so he only makes physical contact when nessesary.

The closest thing to cuddling he would do is sit next to you and press his screen against your temple. It's not exactly a kiss, but more like him resting his head on you after a long day.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they around the house?) 

If you were to live in his studio together he would give you your own room and personalize it to your needs! He doesn't need to clean much since he almost never leaves his office unless it is to either pester the Smg4 crew or hang out with you.

If you two live at your place he'd be a little bit more organized and take on all the cooking. He has been the host for a few MasterChef-like shows, so he knows how to make a nice three course meal when you both eventually get tired of takeout. His specialty is breakfast, mainly pancakes, and he takes great pride in it!

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) 

He would never allow himself to break up with you, and if you were to break up with him, he simply won't let you. Every time you'd try to explain that you're leaving him he'd either talk over you or just cover his antenna and pretend he's not listening, all the while still doing romantic gestures for you as if nothing happened. He is naturally stubborn and refuses to take any form of rejection.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) 

Almost immediately. He would throw a big, sappy wedding and show up in either the cleanest, most stylish sleek suit on the market or the biggest, most beautiful poofy dress ever made.

He'd record the whole thing in five different angles to get every detail on film, but he won't release it to the public. This special day will be for his eyes only.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Incredibly gentle! He doesn't touch you often, but when he does, his fingers are featherlight, and the cozy warmth of his old screen pressed against your face is always comforting.

He could get a little harsh sometimes and say things he really wasn't supposed to, but he always comes back and apologizes when things go too far.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? What are their hugs like?)

He is not used to them at all. Usually if anyone else were to hug him he'd kick them off immediately, but he's more patient when it comes to you.

He feels safe enough around you to let you get closer, but he'll be frozen stiff the entire time, not entirely comfortable with the pressure on his skin just yet. Still, every time you back away he'd insist he doesn't mind, and he means it, he appreciates every form your love comes in. And if you're ever upset, he'll wrap his lanky arms around you and just keep them there until you're feeling better.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?) 

In the early stages of your relationship he wouldn't actually see you as a love interest, but pretend to be interested so you'll fall for him and be there in case you were ever useful.

Soon, however, he found himself actually catching feeling for you. And after some inner turmoil, he finally confesses for real! After that, he would say 'i love you' in almost every conversation. At first he copied what he saw on television, he'd recreate every dramatic gesture and cheezy date, but it would always leave him frustrated for whatever reason.

It wasn't until you pointed out that he was acting instead of actually having fun that he started to slip out of his show host persona. Now his use of 'I love you' is much more sparse, but every time he says it, you know he means it.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) 

Extremely. He is agressively passive-aggressive and if he sees anyone even looking at you in a way he doesn't like he'd immediately be onto them. He'd start off polite at first, basically telling them 'get out or I will throw you out' without saying it, but if they still don't get the hint he will grab them by the scruff of the neck and drag them out.

He would come back to you with a muffin from the snack cart and lead you away to show you his progress on filming the upcoming movie. You're not listening though, neither are you eating, the faint smell of gunpowder coming off of him immediately stumping your appetite.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are him pressing his screen against your face. He doesn't have lips, but his gentle electronic warmth is enough to linger on your skin. He loves kissing your face and hands, having them securely in his hold as he peppers you with kisses. He also likes it when you kiss back, especially around the wires on his wrists and neck, as it is one of the few places where he can still feel touch.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?) 

He's not really a kids guy. On one hand most of his shows are aimed towoards a younger audience, and he wants to introduce kiddos to the wonders of TV! On the other...he can't handle the loud crying and sticky fingers.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

At the morning you will wake up to the smell of freshly made breakfast before you feel him pulling the covers off of you and dragging you to the kitchen. He'd talk about his plans for the day while you're still waking up and grazing on your toast. 

He would then head to the studio, but not before kissing you and saying goodbye like a working husband going out for a long day at work.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) 

Due to his upgrades and mostly electronic nature he doesn't need to sleep. Usually when you go to bed he stays up in his office, pouring his heart out on a script he'd likely end up tossing. Sometimes when he's lonely he'd quietly sneak in your room and lay down next to you, his screen facing you on a blank, staticy channel.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?) 

He doesn't mind sharing his 'tragic backstory' with others, seeing it as just another selling point of his persona, but you seem to be the only one to take it seriously. The irreversible effects of long-term isolation had warped him into a charecature of what he loved most.

You try to make him see just how horrible his situation is so he can start to heal and develop real personality, but it seams near impossible to get through to him. You can't fix something that dead and gone.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) 

Patience is not a virtue Puzzles acknowledges. The second something goes off scrip he will freak out and immediately focus all of his resources on fixing it. He craves control and if something doesn't go his way he will stop at nothing to get what he wants. When he is sulking in his office even the smallest little thing can set him off. 

Luckily, he seemed to have mellowed out after his defeat. When he gets worked up, instead of exploding and taking it out on the closest thing to him (he still misses his favorite remote), he simply let's out a long, tired sigh and goes back to work. Progress, you'd like to believe!

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?) 

He has a very advanced database that he's already explained to you in detail, but you still can't grasp how it works exactly. What you could somehow get was that ever since his face surgeryupgrade, he has been able to record and play back everything he's seen in vivid detail.

He has special folders of where he stores information and one of them is entirely dedicated to you. Every single interaction or passing glimpse is recorded, and sometimes when you're away for a while he likes to play them back and just listen to you talk.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?) 

Probably when he realized you were more important to him than everyone else. It was before you guys started dating. He was in the office repairing his hand after a loose prop fell on him, but he couldn't lock the mechanism in place with just one arm.

It wasn't until you walked in and offered to help that he finally let you touch him, albeit only his non-feeling, motionless palm. When he was done he muttered a quiet 'thanks' and began readjusting the fiberglass plates.<

"No problem, that's what friends are for, after all."

That was when it really sunk in. You guys really were acting just like friends. And it wasn't a staged act or anything, it was all just natural interactions. He had to rationalize it in his brain for quite a bit after that. Were you really friends, or was that just a passing remark? No, you actually meant it. Would he consider you for a friend to begin with...yes.

And so it was official. The day he gained his first friend.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you?) 

He has never felt the need to hire bodyguards, since his pointer finger alone is considered a highly lethal weapon, not only that, but he has complete control over the studio. So if anyone ever tried to break in, he'll just snap his fingers and have a heavy piano prop crush them.

That being said, he is your personal guard dog and will absolutely snap someone out of existence if he feels you are being threatened. 

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) 

Puzzles is a tryhard in every way the word could be interpreted. When he figured out there's more to a relationship than surface level romantic cliches, he began to put more thought into what he gifts or what dates he takes you on, wanting them to be just perfect for you! 

Just like the shows he directs, most of them are hit or miss, but he puts his soul into every single thing he does for you, and you'll always treasure that!

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

His smoking and temper. He's a chain smoker, having one every odd day on good weeks, and blowing through a pack on particularly rough ones. 

For his temper, he usually has a specific set of rules before blowing up. First - try nicely. If that doesn't work, try again, but a bit more sternly. If that doesn't work, try again, but this time make it a clear, threatening warning. And if that doesn't work either, just brainwash them into complying.

You have gone through most of those stages at least a few times, but not the last one. At least, not that you remember. Maybe he figured taking control wasn't worth the trouble, or he was so frustrated that he didn't want to deal with you anymore, but you did notice his patience has been improving, especially when it came to you. Maybe all those therapy sessions you dragged him kicking and screaming to were working!

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Looking as nice as possible is a must, especially if it is to impress you! He obsessively fixes his puffy arm sleeves to fold just right, and if there's something wrong with his current outfit like a stain he hasn't noticed or a crease that won't go away he will just replace the entire outfit with a new, completely identical one. </p>

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

No. No matter at what stage of the healing journey he's in, you will always be a big part of his world. If you go, he loses his partner, his best friend, his co-director, and everyone he's ever loved. He'd be left alone, as he always was, with his TV. . .And for the first time in forever, he'd grow to hate it.

X = Xtra (Random HC) 

While it was his lifelong dream to work in the creative field of television, Mr. Puzzles is not a creative person. He's more of a businessman than a director, creating several successful tech companies for the sole purpose of funding the studio, despite the low ratings. 

Low ratings which are caused by his complete inability to be original, pulling plot points from other established classics and writing them in with his own, stiff, awkward style of storytelling.

He speaks every language ever shown on TV, is fully able to perform invasive surgery without any risks, knows the copyright laws so well, he might as well be a lawyer, had a hand in engineering and programing his body, and has definitely done some less than legal things to get where he is today in the industry. And yet the thing that stumps him is actually being creative.

Y = You (How would they talk about you?)

Your relationship with him is one of the very few things he wishes to keep in his 'private life', so he doesn't talk about you often, mostly just quickly mentioning you when he explains his absence. "Ah, so sorry for depriving you all of my presence, my lovely partner wanted to watch 'Food fight' for the first time and I simply HAD to intervene!"

". . .who invited y-"

"ANYWAYS back to the show!-"

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?) 

He has a powered down mode when he recharges. Before going in that mode he'll go to your room and lay down army style on your bed, but by the time you come home you'll see him  sprawled out on your bed, one foot on the pillow, the other dangling from the edge, with his screen displaying the puzzlevision logo bouncing off the four walls of his monitor.

Thank you guys for reading, hope you enjoyed and have a great day!!! 💕💗💞

#mr. puzzles #smg4 mr puzzles #mr puzzles #mr puzzles smg4 #puzzlevision arc #smg4 puzzlevision #puzzlevision #smg4 #puzzlevision movie #headcanon #headcanons #mr puzzles x reader

[trashytoastboi]

Day of Eternity - Solomon

~ Spicy Sin-Ario GN! Version~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> Gender Neutral version

> Word Count: 1,756 words

> Warnings: NSFW (Aphrodisiac use, Teasing, Overstimulation, Cowgirl, Toys)

Solomon buzzed around his work bench, humming off key to some song he’d heard and blending it with another. Singing the lyrics a bit disjointed and having a good time nevertheless. He lifted the small beacon to his eye to judge the colour and consistency. He sets it back on the table and adds a little something extra, noticing the hue change from a deep indigo to a light pink. He tilted the beacon until a drop fell to his finger and he tasted the potion in question. Solomon licked his lips after sampling the latest creation. Noticing a honey-like sweetness, his body shuddered and grew hot. Such effectiveness from a single drop, it might have been his best one yet. It is perfect and he couldn’t wait for {Name} to try it out. After all {Name} is his apprentice, his partner and on occasion; his test subject. 

Solomon made a pretty grimm from selling a variety of things to the demons in the Devildom, notably his biggest client base happened to be the many succubi and incubi that resided there. He is quite the salesman for lotions, potions, tools and toys. However before selling something Solomon needed to test the efficiency of things. He’s confident in his skills and knows they’re great with the security of no side effects. These tests were mostly for the smaller details and knowing who he should market the products to. So like any other day when Solomon would invite his lovely apprentice over for testing he’d give a brief rundown in person. {Name} trusted whatever Solomon gave them, seeing that nothing had never been dangerous and was easily assured. The sorcerer placed a small vial of pink liquid on the table, {Name} noted the colour is rather eye-catching. They popped the lid off and drank the liquid, their mouth filled with instant sweetness and dissipated with a candy aftertaste. Solomon watched closely for any instantaneous reactions “How is it?” 

“It tastes good”, Solomon chuckled at their response when he meant to specify the effect, however he’s glad to know it’s a pleasant taste. Bitter medicines weren’t all that favoured. “Do you feel anything yet?” he questioned, looking at the grandfather clock in the corner to record the time. He made his first adjustment note-  shortening the time for it to work. A few more minutes pass before {Name} feels a dull tingling throughout their body. They sigh “This is another aphrodisiac isn’t it?, of course this wasn’t the first aphrodisiac he’d had them test and taste, nor would it be the last. “Mhm, but this one is special” Solomon moves a bit closer to {Name}. “I worked on the effect of amplifying the body’s sensitivity.” {Name} nods, trying to sound out any difference between the last aphrodisiac and this one, “It doesn’t feel much different-” their sentence is cut off by Solomon closing in for a kiss and the contact sent a violent electric shock through them, shooting to every inch of their body as a moan fell from their mouth. “W-what was that?!” 

Solomon watched them closely "Looks like it’s working, you let out such a cute voice.” It was obvious that he was teasing. ‘Oh while I have you here, there’s something else I’ve been wanting to test out and I think this is a perfect opportunity.” He ran over to a storage chest on the other side of the study, one he’d enchanted to fit way more beyond its actual capacity and it took him a few minutes to fish out what he was looking for and he brought out a small capsule looking thing. {Name} eyed the capsule suspiciously. It reminded them of those bath toys when you throw it into the water and it would expand into a dinosaur or something . Solomon loved their keen intuition; it was indeed modeled after those but what pops out is very different. He excitedly explained that once it met water it will act as if it’s sentient, it’s not actually alive but will react as if it is. He went into length about how it’s perfect for fulfilling a tentacle fantasy- {Name} stops him right there. “I am not doing tentacles.” They didn’t budge, even when he pouted and tried to convince them with some pleading eyes. Solomon settles for touching {Name’s} wrist and hearing the surprised moan, Solomon slides his hand up their arm. “N-No tentacles…not today at least.” {Name} held their ground. Solomon looks pleased, “I’ll still be using toys, just not my creations. We need to test how far your sensitivity goes” thankfully the things Solomon had in mind were more tame than his tentacle toy. A pair of soft nipple clamps and a vibrator. “You look relieved, were you expecting something weird?” he hums playfully. “This is you we’re talking about.” They retort.

Solomon has them sitting in his lap after stripping them down, every ounce of contact drives them mad and he kisses them fervently, he slows down and takes the time to tease their tongue with his own. {Name’s} body squirms in his lap, tenses and their chest is heaving with heavy breaths. Solomon looks astonished. “You came?” {Name} was more startled than he was, they didn’t realize a kiss would be enough to make them cum. They certainly didn’t complain and leaned in to kiss him even more while moaning into every kiss, the more they felt pleasure coursing through their body. “Do I even need these?” Solomon held the nipple clamps in his hand, and {Name} nodded “Yeah- use them.” He loved how brave they got once a little pleasure muddled their brain. He holds the tip over their nipple and slowly adjusts it, keeping it a little looser than usual in light of {Name’s} reactivity. He adjusted them and pulled on the chain to make sure they were still on tight enough. The slight pull was enough to evoke a partial scream from {Name}. Solomon kisses their neck softly, in a comforting way. "Does the sensitivity make it hurt?” he keeps the clamps with enough tension to pull on their nipples gently. “N-No…it just feels insanely good.”, they huffed out, “So no pain at all?”, {Name} nods. He’s pleased to hear that and pulls the chain harder. {Name} digs their nails into his forearm “Fuck Solomon-!” they cum again, and glares at him. He flashes a devious little smirk at watching them come undone. “Solomon just give me a moment” {Name} asks while trying to gather themselves. “Mhm sure take all the time you need” he said and immediately betrayed his words when he pressed the vibrator right snug against their arousal and switched it on. “You assho-” {Name} nearly bit their tongue when their legs started to shake and they kept trying to force his hand away, Solomon however against their wishes did not budge as they felt another wave of ecstasy washing over them. He moves the vibrator lower down, circling their hole teasingly before pushing inside them. Solomon keeps thrusting the toy in, nice and slow, careful not to push them over the edge again while they’re whining in his lap. “You’re so cute baby," Solomon compliments seeing them struggling against another orgasm when they’d usually be embracing it. 

There’s a lewd squelching sound that makes Solomon purr, “Getting me impatient seeing you all messy like this. Don’t think I can wait much more” he’s playing it off like a joke but judging by the hard thing prodding their ass they know it’s not. “Then don’t wait.” Those words were all Solomon needed to hear, he was falling over himself to try undo his pants enough to get free. The moment he’s shuffled his pants off enough to get some semblance of freedom, his cock is already springing against {Name’s} stomach, they lift their hips and slowly sink down. The languid way they moved down had them cumming just from feeling Solomon pushing inside. “Baby you have to stop cumming for a second or I’m not gonna last.” Solomon hissed through his teeth when he felt how tight they got all around him. “Can’t help it.” they moan out and rocks their hips, only a few minutes of riding had {Name} utterly fucked out and so overstimulated, tears streamed down their face “I can’t…please…” {Name} begged and pouted hoping for some sympathy from their dearest, “Aww I’m sorry baby, I didn’t know it would feel too good to handle” He mocked, giving little kisses in apology as he thrust up into them, kisses drifting from their neck to their collarbones, down their chest before he was sucking on their nipples. The warm, wet feeling of Solomon’s tongue circling the soft bud and lightly sinking his teeth in had them squirming and cumming again. “Sol…stooopp” They whined, “Safeword or I’m not stopping baby.” Solomon stays still for a moment, giving them a chance for the muddled thoughts to clear up enough to utter a single word- they looked at him, never uttering that word. Solomon’s lips turned upward in an evil smile, “Oh you’re begging me to stop but you don’t wanna stop huh, it’s too good?” Solomon is lost in the rapturous sensation and {Name} kisses him. After all the exchanges with kissing and the heat that washes over him Solomon guesses that the effects can be transmitted by bodily fluids. Their insides clamp down tight again, he can’t handle how good it feels every time they do that and it nearly sends him over the edge himself.  He grabs their hips in a desperate attempt, “Didn’t want to cum this fast…” he furrows his brows and speaks through a few shaky breaths. {Name} can see how hard Solomon fights against it and they want to be a little vindictive. {Name} moves against his grip just a little more, a little more they think before they’re clenching around him with the most intense one yet. Solomon curses as it forces him over and he’s cumming, body riddled with intense ecstasy. “Good thing you skipped the tentacles.” Solomon jokes, placing his head against them as they both try to recover. “Is it really necessary to bring that up right now?” They ask Solomon who smiles at their words. “Oh dear it’s absolutely necessary because we’re going to do it next time.” He laughs into another sloppy kiss when {Name} gently shoves his face away “Seriously I think I’m going to die if I cum again.”, Solomon pouts asking if he couldn’t just give them one more.

Taglist: @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf @roninfromtheops

#trashytoastboi #obey me #seven days of sin event #solomon #obey me solomon #unholy toast #gender neutral reader #gender neautral pronouns #solomon x reader #obey me nightbringer #om! nightbringer

[tobiasdrake]

Okay, your post on Videl got me thinking of Lunch again. She was one of the highlights of Dragonball for me, and she just, didn't exist in Z? Outside of a brief appearance at the end of the anime. Do you have any interesting thoughts on her?

Lunch was mostly a combination of two jokes, one of which is gross and the other of which is hysterical.

As a character, Lunch was mostly relegated to two bits. For the first, I think it was a popular gag in 80's and 90's anime to have an elderly pervert try to pull shit on young women only to face violent comeuppance. I remember seeing this in quite a bit of anime back in the day, and that's precisely the gag that the Muten-Roshi came to center around.

This is precisely what Lunch was originally introduced for. A sweet and unassuming woman that Roshi could perv on....

Right up until a sneeze brings out her alter for violent retribution.

Lunch was the first Super Saiyan IN THIS ESSAY I WILL

Fortunately, since Goku spends so little time at Kame House as the manga progresses, we don't tend to see much of this. Instead, the main thing Lunch gets used for is indiscriminate violence. As Blonde Lunch settled in as one of the gang, her propensity for crime and ability to pull firearms straight out of thin air became her main gag.

You know, in retrospect? If she had to be written out? Robbing the Muten-Roshi of that diamond and then flying off over the horizon would have been a great way to do it.

Imagine if this was the last we ever saw of Lunch. Powerhouse of an ending for her character, wasted on a funny bit in the RRA arc.

Honestly, the RRA arc is peak Lunch. That time she kicked God in the butt notwithstanding.

For the last important thing she ever did in the series, that's such a note to go out on.

But in addition to the hilarious diamond bit, the RRA arc also gives us the only time Lunch has actually gotten to use her propensity for violence in a genuine fight. This is one of my favorite Lunch moments.

Mistakenly believing that the Muten-Roshi is the inventor of Goku's Dragon Radar, Red Ribbon moves to seize control of Kame House. This goes badly for them.

It's been like four months since that guy managed to beat Goku in the ring. Y'all made mistakes.

Red Ribbon manages to make him stop doing this to them by taking Lunch hostage.

But Turtle's there with the palm frond.

And then, shortly after, she robbed the Muten-Roshi for that diamond. Her whole part of the General Blue sub-arc is Peak Lunch.

(I genuinely don't know if using sneezes to transition between personalities is, like, a common ableist stereotype in Japanese culture or if Danganronpa's Genocide Jack was inspired by Lunch specifically. I do wonder.)

The 22nd Tenkaichi Budokai, however, would kickstart what would unexpectedly be the beginning of the end for Lunch.

Her takeaway from Goku and Tenshinhan's final match is that Ten is a fucking beast and Mama Want. This wasn't supposed to be how her character exits the series. But then Raditz showed up.

In the reunion between Goku and his friends at Kame House, Yamcha and Lunch would both reasonably be expected to be present. Yamcha's absence is explained by him and Bulma fighting again, while Lunch is said to have left after the 23rd Tenkaichi Budokai to go with Tenshinhan.

And then she never came back. This was the last we ever heard of her. Toriyama has said in interview that he forgot she existed, but he did still occasionally draw her or provide a few extra details for what ever became of her and Tenshinhan's... situation.

In interview following the release of Battle of Gods, he finally gave a final ending for Lunch and Ten's situation.

"Stoic Tenshinhan mainly does farming in addition to his training. He can split into multiple bodies and grow extra arms, so harvesting the crops goes quickly. He was found by Lunch, who fell in love with him at first sight and had been constantly pursuing his whereabouts, and even reluctantly lived together with her; but she wasn’t cut out for farming, and Tenshinhan has no interest in romance, so she left after just a few days. After that, it seems Lunch apparently stops in from time to time."

We don't get to see much of Ten's social life because he doesn't associate with anybody. He and Chiaotzu are an island unto themselves, only popping in when the Earth is in peril.

Unless they're undergoing some sort of heavenly trial or fighting the apocalypse, they don't hang out with Kame-senryu. And since our guys are Kame-senryu, that means we don't get to hang out with them.

They're off doing their own thing and walking their own path. And Lunch is over there in the mystical land of wherever they fucking go with them now. Popping in on the aromantic Tenshinhan from time to time while living her exciting life of crime.

So, farewell Lunch. You really were a hoot to have around.

#dragon ball #dragon ball z #lunch

[matchesarelit]

Imagine If You Will... (Ocean of Grass, Colin Bridgerton x f!Reader)

The Queen opens a new gallery space, and you can barely tear your eyes form the works on the walls, until art starts pouring from the lips by your side.

W/C: ~2.8k Warnings: None I believe A/N: there is a part where writing it was like patting myself on the back, so damn strange. fear not, I am not that up myself. but reader had to simp over smtg.

Stepping onto the marbled flooring of the gallery, you struggled to keep your concentration on the task of putting one foot in front of the other. Eyes locking on the pieces adorning the walls and topping the podiums. The words of greeting hitting your ears from all directions as you began trailing the walls of the space, were forgotten immediately, muscle memory replies rolling off your tongue with ease. The same old people and same old conversations were now framed by works of detail and grace grander than you'd ever had the pleasure of seeing.

The tickle of lace over your arm was the only thing to prompt you back to the world of the Ton, as an elbow hooked through your own and a head weighed down your shoulder. Vanessa, a close family friend, had taken her place by your side, as she often did, leaning into you and squeezing your arm in a silent greeting. Taking a moment you finished following the length of a brushstroke, before you tore your stare away and with a breath, that you held for perhaps a beat too long, looked towards your friend.

'Hello' The bland greeting was all your brain could hope to form at that moment. Your mind was shaken awake as the woman by your side responded simply with a suppressed squeak and a wide-eyed grin.

Her expression held within it a great amount of glee and undoubtedly a grand quantity of gossip, only being held back by the tight-pressed line of her lips, a sight that never failed to elicit a smile of your own. Raising your eyebrows slightly, you opened the floodgates and suddenly you found yourself much more knowledgeable about the events that had preceded your arrival. 

To the best of your understanding; One young lady had swooned at the revealing visage in one of the paintings, The queen had not yet made her appearance yet would most certainly do so soon and many of the mamas and papas had retired to the adjacent tea rooms which many had taken as a sign to converse freely. The latter explained the cacophony you registered now free of your stupor, but it certainly surprised you as you surveyed the room to find the group of your peers crowding a piece only a few meters away. 

'Are they discussing that work? Come, surely this will be interesting' You tugged your friend along as you started towards the trio, Vanessa and you discussed each of your hobbies with each other at length but rarely had the chance to discuss such matters with other members of the Ton.

'I don't believe they ar-' Vanessa's warning was cut short as you greeted the small group, not registering her concern in your excitement. 'Hello!'

Looking to the women closest who turned on the spot to see you, you watched with confusion as their smiles twisted into bitter replicas of kindness, each of them giving a nod to you, a small curtsey to the art and turning to walk away.

'Where are yo-' Your words trailed off, your eyes on the receding figures of the other debutantes, as Vanessa spoke up from beside you;

'Good afternoon Mr. Bridgerton, Mr. Bridgerton' From your peripherals you watched her curtsey, you followed suit before you had thought to comprehend why.

'Good afternoo- OH' Your realization wasn't loud, but it wasn't silent either, so truly you shouldn't have been as startled as you were when a pair of matching chuckles were heard from the men in front of you.

'We did not mean to interrupt, we were under the impre-' Vanessa was silenced as Colin Bridgerton shook his head slightly, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth before he spoke up in a lilting tone; 

'No need to apologize. Who would we be to be upset with such beautiful company? We are truly a lucky pair of gentlemen.' 

A minuscule bow of your head and a flash of a smile that you refused to let within a mile of your eyes, crossed your expression before you were blinking your eyes into focus. Looking to the older Bridgerton with a gaping expression Vanessa had, long ago, coined as prized koi, you found your voice a moment too late.

'Amidst my travels-'

'Mr Bridgerton, You are an artist are you not? What are your thoughts on the collection thus far?' You had spoken at the same time and inadvertently cut off Colin. Your mind catching up with your mistake had you countering your question with a rushed apology to the man at your left; 'I am so sorry Mr. Bridgerton, please go on,' Looking up at him you matched the warm smile he sent you as best you could despite the heat in your cheeks.

'It is no problem at all, I was simply saying-'

This time it was Benedict who interrupted his brother with a waving hand of dismissal and a much too-happy-with-himself smirk, at which the younger simply scoffed.

'I am indeed, I was studying for a while but have found the natural approach to growing my abilities to be more fulfilling. I have found some of the pieces featuring the Welsh townships inexplicitly compelling, the detail and depth given to the cobblestones is startling.'  

'That sounds...' You began before pausing somewhat taken aback by the fullness of his answer.

'Compelling' you finished before shifting to the balls of your feet, peering back over the crowd to search the walls for the works Benedict spoke of. 

'And what of this one?' A new voice spoke from behind you, Viscount Edward Lowe had approached and looked to the piece that hung behind the Bridgerton men.

You felt Vanessa's arm slip from your own, as she met your eyes, tilting her head to the side, you nodded in return, assuring her you would be fine should she take her leave. 

'Mr Lowe' Benedict greeted, 'Grown a sudden interest in the arts have you?'

'Not so much as I have found in my betrothed.' Smiling to yourself at the glance the couple shared, you watched as Vanessa took his offered arm and stepped away from the three of you.

'They make a charming couple do they not?' You mused to seemingly no one, not waiting for the opinions of the brothers before shifting yourself to study to the work framed on the wall. 'I find the colouring of this one to be concerningly bland, as if the artist had naught but three hues on his palette and was unaware he could mix them.' Your words pulled a laugh from Benedict while Colin remained silent, 'I apologise if that was too cruel,' Looking towards the latter you found him shaking his head slightly as if to dismiss your apology, and still your eyes remained on his silent figure for a few moments longer even as his brother began to speak.

Benedict was fast to fill the silence, eyes trained on the artwork as he shifted to fill the space to your right,

'I agree, it makes the work come off hollow, as if he, himself felt disconnected from the scene he stood amongst, which if that is the case I would ask him why he desired to commit it to canvas.'

'Perhaps his intention was indeed to spur discourse over that distant feeling?' You mused, attempting to refrain from overly critical comments going forth. 'What do you think Mr Bridgerton?' As you addressed the younger of the two, you watched him glance towards the art, eyes roaming the surface with some obscure purpose.

'The- um, the reds are a strange choice for such trees that don't shed with the seasons' He was softspoken yet the charm of his tone was absent, a vulnerable air to his persona that was rare to see amidst Society. 

Nodding to yourself as you let your own eyes fall back upon the art, you attempted to consider the implications of such a choice. Benedict, on the other hand, seemed not similarly inclined as he started his assertion, 'The warm shades are a strange choice but I doubt it was a pensive decision. He seems unable to make use of any cooler tones. The brush strokes in that area, however, are not dissimilar to that of a toddler with their fingers dipped in mud. Pure chaos. So perhaps he aims to discuss the unpredictability of the natural world.' 

Colin's face was more unsure than ever, clearly out of his comfort zone and flanked by two enthusiasts was surely not the easiest position to be in.

'Perhaps the red of the trees work to add to that chaos Mr. Bridgerton, the artist certainly could have made them brown. Most trees do reach that colour as they die.' You had averted your eyes to the older of the pair, hoping to give the younger a moment to collect his confidence which, to all appearances, he managed, as within moments he spoke again.

'I-I also find the textures... quite... realistic' His voice was still low and somewhat unsure of himself, this was of course not helped by the immediate response, once again, of his brother nor the brow quirked in amusement that accompanied it.

'You find the flat orange expanse of grass, with no discernible brush strokes, accurate?' 

'Mr Bridgerton, if that is how your brother experiences the work is that not a testament to the nature of art itself as a concept that is entirely subjective' Your rebuttal, if it even counted as that, was weak and somewhat irrelevant, even so when Colin spoke next his voice was notedly more settled.

'It follows memories of mine of hills of grass in the wind, moving as the ocean does not as singular blades but as a fabric of silken thread.'

To say his words caught you off guard would be inadequate to describe the buzz and ache that filled your mind and chest at his observation. Everything aside from the artwork and his presence by your side fell from thought. Benedict's lips were moving, that much you were sure of, although that wasn't much of an accomplishment as even the man in the painting could surely hear his opinions.

Colin's words were still floating through your mind, drifting in and out, painting the picture within your head, the image, as clear as it was beautiful. He had set out the details so masterfully you doubted more than a select few painters could compete at rendering such a scene.

Looking up at the man by your side you watched as he rolled his eyes, exasperated as a bright blush crawled over the peaks of his cheekbones. You were startled when his observation fell on you once more, this time partnered with a touch of confusion as he glanced to his brother and back. 

'Are you quite alright?' You watched his lips form the words and still they took comparable years to reach your ears, not to mention the decade it took for you to splutter out a response.

'Oh, I'm quite alright, thank you Mr Bridgerton.' Shifting on your feet you glance to the art before settling your attention on the elder brother, hoping to remain grounded in conversation, 'Art has a way of consuming my attention, although usually, I can maintain focus on the discussion and not drift into thought'

A bright smile broke over Benedict's face in jest as he clasped a hand on the other man's shoulder, 'It seems we are boring her dear brother,' 

'Oh, I assure you that is not the case. You have both given me so much to consider I simply couldn't stop my mind from wandering.' Looking up to Colin you hoped he knew you spoke of his words, and as his eyes met yours you watched his signature smile bloom on his face.

Nonetheless, breathless, you spoke up again, 'I apologise for my rudeness.' His expression melted every ounce of tension in the air and like a windswept hill allowed you to breathe easy.

Keeping his gaze on yours he leaned closer, barely an inch, un-noticeable from afar but up close it was enough to have your breath catching in your chest as his lips parted in a whisper; 'Best to save that for the art hm?' His smile, was now a full-blown smirk as he straightened himself. You could swear his movement had stolen the heat from your skin as he retreated those measly few centimetres to stand back by your side, this time, however, he extended an arm for you to take.

'Shall we move on to the next one? I am eager to hear how you shall tear it apart-' the last second of his speech was cut short by the blaring trumpet that announced Her Majesty's arrival, 'We shall have to save that for later...' Your words, although a whisper, were stronger than you thought you could manage given the nerves plaguing your chest, and surprisingly, your composure was strong enough to allow yourself to retreat to the other side of the room. Stopping short of the wall you stopped, finding yourself alongside your friend and her husband-to-be, stationed by the refreshments... exactly what you needed.

The queen had not spoken for long, but the air in the room had grown hot, so aching for a breeze you stepped outside the moment her speech concluded. Walking clear of the tiled path that hugged the exterior of the gallery you landed amongst the grass of the gardens, traversing the plains your eyes hovered around the horizon, cloaked in statues, hedges, and shrubbery it trapped your attention. You charted the curves of green, trailing your hand against the leaves as you strolled, turn after turn until hedges eight feet high were all you could see.

The maze was not a difficult one to escape, you had surely only rounded a few corners, but the peace was difficult to pull yourself away from. It was simply you, the wind, the trees, and a single set of footfalls.

'Mr. Bridgerton' Startled yet relieved, you stepped to the middle of the path, away from the branches and towards the approaching figure as he rounded the turn. 'What are you doing out here?'

'Am I not to be?' His question was teasing and the smirk across his lips broke the charade of his concerned tone as he continued, 'In that case, you shouldn't be out here either...'

'I-I only meant-' your words were forced out through breaths that grew ever more shallow as he drew closer.

'Why am I here? That's what you meant isn't it?' Now, standing mere inches from you, his voice was quiet, barely audible above the rustle of the leaves and the whistle of the wind. 

'Yes, that's what I meant. Why are you out her-' Feeling small under his gaze you set your stare on somewhere through his chest, a far-off distance blocked by his being just as your question was halted by his voice,

'Guess.' 

'The wind is moving today, the grass, the trees, they do as you said. You came out to feel it for yourself?' The guess was the best you could produce that wasn't corrupted by the heaving of his chest and the depth of his voice. His lips parted though you beat him to it as you questioned him further, 'Why are you breathing so heavily?'

Reaching forward at a snail's pace you sought out his eyes only to find them affixed to your hand as it drifted nearer, 'Mr-'

'"Colin", please' his correction was soft as he inched forth, his chest leaning into the touch as he sighed at the contact.

'Colin, why?'

Encasing your hand within his own as he held it to his breast, he parted his lips once more, 'Listen to the trees, the branches, the leaves. They breathe as we do, as one. Like waves crashing upon the shore,' With a deep breath in his chest pressed into your fingers, 'before returning to the depths,' With a shaky sigh you found yourself emptying your lungs alongside the man in front of you.

Holding his eyes with your own you slipped your hand free, the flash of pain across his eyes faded instantly as you turned his wrist, pressing his palm to your skin.

'Waves crashing down on the sand' your voice is low yet resolute as you breathe in, Colin following suit, 'Before finding its way to the depths...' Raising yourself to your toes you press your lips to his. Releasing your breath, no sooner have your heels returned to the grass than his hand has found your waist and pulled you back to him.

#colin bridgerton x reader

[feralsteddie]

thinking about t4t steddie again ✌🏻😔

#steve harrington #steddie #eddie munson #this also goes with t4t st*ncy (censoring just so I don’t clog up the tag for them) #do you see my vision #if not I will explain it in great detail if you would like #pyreposting

[chibishortdeath]

Yippie! So silly (kinda sad) idea I had I while ago that I need to draw about again aaaa— Anyway, there were a lot details that had me thinking about stuff in certain games. Harmony of Despair has the “Helmont/Shiimon/Simon Wraith” enemies that have this ominous description of “some say this is what happened to Simon Belmont in the end”, and it’s just never mentioned again. Like damn ok that’s uh some interesting information wow uh— Also that coupled with the hanging skeletons being a reference to Simon in CV4 and also being in the hanged man position, the family heirlooms in the ghostly Dracula’s castle in Harmony of Dissonance, and the quest for Anna in Order of Ecclesia about helping her cat protect her from dark spirits that’s ended with a really sudden line about her having nightmares about a man with a whip fighting something scary, my guy is haunting the narrative and doesn’t sound like he’s doing so great 💀.

So the Ghost Simon concept was born and uh here he is I guess lol. Part of it also came from the idea that we’ve already seen a ghost companion in the series in Wind (if you know you know), but what if there was one you had to help that was a little more uh what’s the word… tormented? Vengeful? Upset in general? Yeah. He’s kinda just a mix of a bunch of different ghost lore, not one in particular. Fun fact: Dulahans sometimes use their own spines as a whip :3. And in a lot of folklore Strigoi often prey on their own family members, especially the younger girls in the family. But yeah, he’s just kind of a nuisance, not really like ‘evil’ or anything. Breaks things sometimes, generally pesters people, only occasionally a minor threat. Maybe leaves bloody footprints sometimes, turns paintings crooked, writes omens on walls, ya know, average ghost activities. I like to think that the boss rush with him in HoD is what he’s been doing for a while. Maybe Juste unknowingly takes him home with some of the furniture, probably the grandfather clock lol. Idk it’s just a fun what if idea for fun tho mostly d(^^ ).

#castlevania #castlevania games #simon belmont #art post #my art #does this count as an AU? #I don’t really think it does??? #it’s just some ‘what if he spooky’ funny idea idk #does this count as cringe or whatever (joke I know it’s cringe I’m just happy with it) #some of these details I would love to see more on tho like #Konami what do you mean Simon’s name can be a pun in Japanese on the word for death #what do you mean if you spell it a little differently it means Gates of Death Konami I need answers— #or don’t explain anything and give more random ominous vague information #i would appreciate it #a lot actually #please say more random spooky things about this guy #what little to no content does to a mf #Simon’s Quest is a great game (I am going insane) #should I even tag all the games I mentioned in this or is putting this on the main tags enough of a risk as it is— #anyway I wanna make more random speculation collages I’m just on and off burnt out constantly help #this is primarily for silly situations like idk Maxim asking if anyone else has seen that dead guy in the mirror they brought home lol #thinkin about the idea of a game set in the 50s about a horror movie being made about the legends of Simon #and he’s there (in spirit lol) being a complete nuisance on set #the lead actor is just trying to work and here’s some ghostly voice say ‘I would not have my hair that short ewwwww’ #aaaaa I should also draw that idea damn #maybe Halloween being a thing will get me to do it (TwT ) #TUMBLR JUST KICKED ME OUT OF THE APP I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA LOSE THIS WHOLE POST THAT WAS SCARY—

[vexenya]

Devilman is about Satan’s decent from he/him to he/they

#devilman #ryo asuka #when I die and I’m at Hell’s gates I will be faced with lots of stuff #But I hope the actual Satan won’t pull up this post and be like 🤨 @ it #Not because I’m embarrassed but because it would cause me to explain in great detail that I didn’t mean him I meant DEVILMAN satan -> #Which is gonna lead to me infodumping about devilman for years #And he’ll get so annoyed he’ll send me to Heaven just so he won’t have to hear it anymore #‘You must have been a pretty nice person to get into heaven!’ nah I was just rlly annoying about my special interest

[sorcerous-caress]

Maybe we'll write the first notes that will become the beginning of a song someone will sing for us.

Inspire a set of hands to pick up an instrument for the first time and strum a melody.

Be the echos that linger on the tongue, that someone humms to stride forward.

Writing is a beautiful thing, I will gladly say I'll humm each verse you craft for a long time.

The idea that I'd have any lingering effect on anyone at all makes me feel immense joy <3 thank you so much, this was so beautifully written.

I hope so, I really hope some people would see my writing or read my encouragement for others and get inspired to write their own stories or craft their own art. It's like a chain because I myself was inspired by others to start writing! And other people in the future will be inspired by any of my readers who started/went back to writing because of me.

Even if they don't, it's alright. I'm honestly grateful that they made time to read what I wrote and hear what I have to say.

And I'm thankful for your existence. Your writing style is especially captivating, and you inspired so many things in my blog. <3

#also!!! I read the tags you left in the reblogs and we NEEED to talk about the githyanki touch starved theory #it is a MUST #please #also Khal'ian's response in the soulmates post #i like when characters are cleary invested in their class or cause #seeing a monk depicted as wise but endearingly awkward is so refreshing #with how he genuinely belives in ki and in people being made of many parts #and that those parts are destined to meet as they make a different shape this time in another universe #if asked about it then Sol would deny the fact they believe in such things #but they do believe in people's souls being born from the same star it's like a tale passed down in their family #and they are embarrassingly enamoured by it since they were a child and wondered if someone out there came from the same star as them #they'd be like 👀 when Khal'ian brings up the Ki things and realise this sounds really familiar to the story they heard #try to inquire futher but play it cool like yeah no I totally dont believe in that anyway mind explaining it in great detail to me for 6hrs? #♡Githzerai anon #♡LoveLetters

[stevethehairington]

if i never had to use amtrak again that would be the best day ever

#AMTRAK IS SO FUCKING STUPID #THEY fucked up on a trip i was on a while back and gave me a voucher for it which was great! #but the voucher is apparently ONE USE ONLY??? #so if im taking a trip thats less than 300 bucks (which i AM) then basically fuck you you lose the rest of that money #AND THEY DONT MAKE IT CLEAR THAT ITS ONE USE EITHER #so i used it for a 29 dollar ticket. a TWENTY NINE DOLLAR TICKET. when i had 300 bucks to use. #so i LOST 271 #i called them and talked to them and they were nice enough to give me a new voucher for the 271 so i didnt lose it #(bc when i asked WHY they have one use only vouchers the guy literally said uhh idk why. so i was like if u cant explain the reason behind #it it literally shouldnt be a rule) #so now i have a 271 voucher and i would like to use it all but one trip isnt 271 so i wanna book multiple trips at once to use it all #BUT THAT IS LIKE IMPOSSIBLE??? #THERES LIKE NO FEATURE THAT ALLOWS ME TO BOOK MULTIPLE TRIPS AT ONCE? #so i called AGAIN to ask someone how #and they were like oh we can do it for you! #i was like great! and started going through my travel details and the lady was like cool we have a train at 6am. and i was like ?? #the website said theres one at 10:55 i want that one i dont need to be there at 6 am and she was like oh well we cant book that bc its #not an amtrak train its a capital corridor train #LADY WHAT THE HELL #WHY IS THIS SO DIFFICULT #I JUST WANT TO BOOK MY STUPID TRIPS AND NOT LOSE MY MONEY!!!! #needless to say. #i fucking hate amtrak #do not reccomend #drive people the exorbitant gas prices are worth it if it means you dont have to use fucking amtrak sdjflkg #mack rambles

[theold-ultraviolence]

.

#this mf asking me to explain in detail which horror movies I recommend snd why #like #it would be a great thing to ask #if it wasn’t the end of the workday #when I’m tired #I wanna be left alone #don’t wanna think about anything #and in all truth I haven’t even seen any new movies at all recently #I can recommend Pearl and Barbarian but I can’t possibly think of why I liked them #I just did #here you have exhibit A of irma being exhausted with life

[dwn024]

aaaagggghhhhhhhh [<- he is getting exponentially worse]

#i feel like i need to remake just to spiritually cleanse this blog something about it is contaminated #but it hasn’t even been six months since the last time i remade so i like. don’t feel allowed #i feel like it would just be more hassle than it’s worth #especially because it’s more work to ask 300+ people to refollow me than just the task of me refollowing myself #cuz that’s 300+ people that have to be inconvenienced by me and i would rather blow my brains out #and 300+ people of which the majority probably only just barely tolerates me at best #a couple nice reassuring messages saying how that isn’t the case is nothing VS paranoia hydrogen bomb #cuz that’s still the majority unaccounted for and it doesn’t just average out as if #‘’oh well some people have spoken up about Liking you so Obviously that’s the average majority’’ #incorrect all that means is the handful of people willing to say anything are on that side i can’t make assumptions for everyone else #i just wish someone would get sick of me enough to send anon hate about it explaining in great detail everything they hate about me #so that i know for certain where the numbers lie and the reasons for it instead of everyone silently agreeing to erase me from existence #because of something i have no idea i may have done wrong #just acknowledge me!!!! excessively and in detail!!!! i’m barely corporeal here as is the least you can do is vent your frustrations at me

[to-be-a-dreamer]

I watched Shadowhunters for the first time (don't ask why we all know the reason) and I have. So many questions. But the only one I have the mental capacity to ask right now is: Where the frick do Alec's arrows come from???

Cause sometimes he pulls them directly out of his quiver but he only ever carries like six at a time and we never see him pick them back up. And then sometimes he summons them??? Or something??? I dunno they just kinda appear in his hand in a glow of light??? So are they magic? But we saw him get some out of the armory in Season 1 so he can't just make them out of nothing. And then sometimes he raises his bow and there's just an arrow (or five) already loaded and he doesn't have a quiver on at all.

Where do they come from??? Also, why is Alec the only shadowhunter we ever see using a ranged weapon? Like I get it that we want the main four to all have different specialty weapons but Alec is seemingly the only archer in the entire institute this feels like a massive oversight on everyone's part. Sometimes we see someone throw a spear or a knife but that's not the same and you know it, why is there not an entire division of fighters who specialize in archery?

#all in all it was an okay show and i understand why it was popular #i can see the potential for something great is there and it was starting to get really good in season 3 #so it's kind of a shame they never got a chance to prove themselves #but there's still so many absolutely horrible writing choices that just make me want to scream #and most of it's little details that you could easily explain in like ten seconds #which just makes it a thousand times more frustrating #but if you ignore all that and just have a good time it's pretty enjoyable #it's possible that i'm just being annoying about stuff most people wouldn't even notice #i tend to do that so yeah #6/10 would kinda recommend #if nothing else magnus and alec are cute and i liked their storyline a lot #simon/maia was good while it lasted and i liked clary/jace in season 3 #simon/izzy and maryse/luke both kinda caught me off guard but within two seconds i was shipping them them HARD #as always the wlw couple should have gotten more screen time but what else is new #although i think the characters should have given up on all the romance drama and just formed a giant polylcule #you know they all want to #shadowhunters #alec lightwood #alexander lightwood #shadowhunters tv #shadowhunters spoilers #it's been like 3 years but just in case

[trashytoastboi]

Day of Eternity - Solomon

~Spicy Sin-Ario F! Version~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> Female version

> Word count: 1,754 words

Warning: NSFW (Aphrodisiac use, Teasing, Overstimulation, Cowgirl, Toys)

Solomon buzzed around his work bench, humming off key to some song he’d heard and blending it with another. Singing the lyrics a bit disjointed and having a good time nevertheless. He lifted the small beacon to his eye to judge the colour and consistency. He sets it back on the table and adds a little something extra, noticing the hue change from a deep indigo to a light pink. He tilted the beacon until a drop fell to his finger and he tasted the potion in question. Solomon licked his lips after sampling the latest creation. Noticing a honey-like sweetness, his body shuddered and grew hot. Such effectiveness from a single drop, it might have been his best one yet. It is perfect and he couldn’t wait for {Name} to try it out. After all {Name} is his apprentice, his girlfriend and on occasion; his test subject. 

Solomon made a pretty grimm from selling a variety of things to the demons in the Devildom, notably his biggest client base happened to be the many succubi and incubi that resided there. He is quite the salesman for lotions, potions, tools and toys. However before selling something Solomon needed to test the efficiency of things. He’s confident in his skills and knows they’re great with the security of no side effects. These tests were mostly for the smaller details and knowing who he should market the products to. So like any other day when Solomon would invite his lovely apprentice over for testing he’d give a brief rundown in person. {Name} trusted whatever Solomon gave her, seeing that nothing had never been dangerous and was easily assured. The sorcerer placed a small vial of pink liquid on the table, {Name} noted the colour is rather eye-catching. She popped the lid off and drank the liquid, her mouth filled with instant sweetness and dissipated with a candy aftertaste. Solomon watched closely for any instantaneous reactions “How is it?” 

“It tastes good”, Solomon chuckled at her response when he meant to specify the effect, however he’s glad to know it’s a pleasant taste. Bitter medicines weren’t all that favoured. “Do you feel anything yet?” he questioned, looking at the grandfather clock in the corner to record the time. He made his first adjustment note-  shortening the time for it to work. A few more minutes pass before {Name} feels a dull tingling throughout her body. She sighs “This is another aphrodisiac isn’t it?, of course this wasn’t the first aphrodisiac he’d had her test and taste, nor would it be the last. “Mhm, but this one is special” Solomon moves a bit closer to {Name}. “I worked on the effect of amplifying the body’s sensitivity.” {Name} nods, trying to sound out any difference between the last aphrodisiac and this one, “It doesn’t feel much different-” her sentence is cut off by Solomon closing in for a kiss and the contact sent a violent electric shock through her, shooting to every inch of her body as a moan fell from her mouth. “W-what was that?!” 

Solomon watched her closely "Looks like it’s working, you let out such a cute voice.” It was obvious that he was teasing. ‘Oh while I have you here, there’s something else I’ve been wanting to test out and I think this is a perfect opportunity.” He ran over to a storage chest on the other side of the study, one he’d enchanted to fit way more beyond its actual capacity and it took him a few minutes to fish out what he was looking for and he brought out a small capsule looking thing. {Name} eyed the capsule suspiciously. It reminded her of those bath toys when you throw it into the water and it would expand into a dinosaur or something . Solomon loved her keen intuition; it was indeed modeled after those but what pops out is very different. He excitedly explained that once it met water it will act as if it’s sentient, it’s not actually alive but will react as if it is. He went into length about how it’s perfect for fulfilling a tentacle fantasy- {Name} stops him right there. “I am not doing tentacles.” She didn’t budge, even when he pouted and tried to convince her with some pleading eyes. Solomon settles for touching {Name’s} wrist and hearing the surprised moan, Solomon slides his hand up her arm. “N-No tentacles…not today at least.” {Name} held her ground. Solomon looks pleased, “I’ll still be using toys, just not my creations. We need to test how far your sensitivity goes” thankfully the things Solomon had in mind were more tame than his tentacle toy. A pair of soft nipple clamps and a vibrator. “You look relieved, were you expecting something weird?” he hums playfully. “This is you we’re talking about.” She retorts.

Solomon has her sitting in his lap after stripping her down, every ounce of contact drives her mad and he kisses her fervently, he slows down and takes the time to tease her tongue with his own. {Name’s} body squirms in his lap, tenses before her chest is heaving with heavy breaths. Solomon looks astonished. “You came?” {Name} was more startled than he was, she didn’t realize a kiss would be enough to make her cum. She certainly didn’t complain and leaned in to kiss him even more moaning into every kiss, the more she felt pleasure coursing through her body. “Do I even need these?” Solomon held the nipple clamps in his hand, and {Name} nodded “Yeah- use them.” He loved how brave she got once a little pleasure muddled her brain. He holds the tip over her nipple and slowly adjusts it, keeping it a little looser than usual in light of {Name’s} reactivity. He adjusted them and pulled on the chain to make sure they were still on tight enough. The slight pull was enough to evoke a partial scream from her. Solomon kisses her neck softly, in a comforting way. "Does the sensitivity make it hurt?” he keeps the clamps with enough tension to pull on her nipples gently. “N-No…it just feels insanely good.”, she huffs out, “So no pain at all?”, {Name} nods. He’s pleased to hear that and pulls the chain harder. {Name} digs her nails into his forearm “Fuck Solomon-!” she cums again, and glares at him. He flashes a devious little smirk at watching her come undone. “Solomon just give me a moment” {Name} asks while trying to gather herself. “Mhm sure take all the time you need” he said and immediately betrayed his words when he pressed the vibrator right snug against her clit and switched it on. “You assho-” {Name} nearly bit her tongue when her legs started to shake and she kept trying to force his hand away, Solomon however against her wishes did not budge as she felt another wave of ecstasy washing over her. He moves the vibrator lower down, circling her hole teasingly before pushing inside her. Solomon keeps thrusting the toy in, nice and slow, careful not to push her over the edge again while she’s whining in his lap. “You’re so cute baby," Solomon compliments seeing her struggling against another orgasm when she’d usually be embracing it. 

There’s a lewd squelching sound that makes Solomon purr, “Getting me impatient seeing you all messy like this. Don’t think I can wait much more” he’s playing it off like a joke but judging by the hard thing prodding her ass she knows it’s not. “Then don’t wait.” Those words were all Solomon needed to hear, he was falling over himself to try undo his pants enough to get free. The moment he’s shuffled his pants off enough to get some semblance of freedom, his cock is already springing against {Name’s} stomach, she lifts her hips and slowly sinks down. The languid way she moved down had her cumming just from feeling him pushing inside. “Baby you have to stop cumming for a second or I’m not gonna last.” Solomon hissed through his teeth when he felt how tight she got all around him. “Can’t help it.” she moans out and rocks her hips, only a few minutes of riding had {Name} utterly fucked out and so overstimulated, tears streamed down her face “I can’t…please…” {Name} begged and pouted hoping for some sympathy from her dearest, “Aww I’m sorry baby, I didn’t know it would feel too good to handle” He mocked, giving little kisses in apology as he thrust up into her, kisses drifting from her neck to her collarbones, down her chest before he was sucking on her nipples. The warm, wet feeling of Solomon’s tongue circling the soft bud and lightly sinking is teeth in had her squirming and cumming again. “Sol…stooopp” She whined, “Safeword or I’m not stopping baby.” Solomon stays still for a moment, giving her a chance for the muddled thoughts to clear up enough to utter a single word- she looked at him, never uttering that word. Solomon’s lips turned upward in an evil smile, “Oh you’re begging me to stop but you don’t wanna stop huh, it’s too good?” Solomon is lost in the rapturous sensation she kisses him. After all the exchanges with kissing and the heat that washes over him he guesses that the effects can be transmitted by bodily fluids. Her insides clamp down tight again, he can’t handle how good it feels every time she does that and it nearly sends him over the edge himself.  He grabs her hips in a desperate attempt, “Didn’t want to cum this fast…” he furrows his brows and speaks through a few shaky breaths. {Name} can see how hard Solomon fights against it and she wants to be a little vindictive. She moves against his grip just a little more, a little more she thinks before she’s clenching around him with the most intense one yet. Solomon curses as it forces him over and he’s cumming, body riddled with intense ecstasy. “Good thing you skipped the tentacles.” Solomon jokes, placing his head against her as they both try to recover. “Is it really necessary to bring that up right now?” She asks Solomon who smiles at her words. “Oh dear it’s absolutely necessary because we’re going to do it next time.” He laughs into another sloppy kiss when {Name} gently shoves his face away “Seriously I think I’m going to die if I cum again.”, Solomon pouts asking if he couldn’t just give her one more.

Taglist: @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf @roninfromtheops

#trashytoastboi #solomon #seven days of sin event #obey me solomon #om! solomon #obey me nightbringer solomon #obey me nightbringer #obey me event #solomon x reader #female reader #unholy toast #om nb #nightbringer

[somuch-4-stardust]

hi ppl w eyes that arent like black/dark brown idk. we dont care what color ur eyes were as a kid actually. we do not care how ur eyes look in a certain weather/season/lighting/room of ur house/whatever the fuck. 'when i was a kid they used to be very green but now they're grey but they're blue sometimes and in the summer they have like a hazel tint' we literally just needed a simple answer we do not care abt ur life story shut up

#YOU CAN BE SPECIFIC ABT THE COLOR. BUT I NEED ONE COLOR. #JUST ONE COLOR. ONE SINGULAR COLOR #I DONT CARE THAT IT USED TO BE BLUE. WHY WOULD I CARE THAT IT USED TO BE BLUE #WHY WOULD THAT BE RELEVANT AT ALL??? THIS BAFFLES ME. WHY WOULD I CARE HOW IT LOOKS IN THE WINTER IF ITS NOT THE WINTER??? #LIKE YOU JUST GIVE THIS LITTLE SPEECH EVERYTIME SOMEONE ASKS ABT UR EYE COLOR??????? WHY WOULD I CARE? #i lvoe my friends very much. and i do care for them very much . i care abt all the little details abt them EXCEPT FOR THIS ONE #dont you feel silly. dont you feel a little ashamed. #do you ever get tired of explaining ur whole life history to ppl when they ask abt ur eyes? or is this just great entertainment for u? #and YEAH i am a little jealous . BUT STILL #the way ppl say it. sometimes its just genuinely 'i have grey eyes... although as a kid i used to have green eyes haha' #BUT I STG #SOME OF YALL HAVE THIS ATTITUDE. U EXPECT ME TO CARE!!! THE AUDACITY!!!

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Kickstarting a book to end enshittification, because Amazon will not carry it

My next book is The Internet Con: How to Seize the Means of Computation: it’s a Big Tech disassembly manual that explains how to disenshittify the web and bring back the old good internet. The hardcover comes from Verso on Sept 5, but the audiobook comes from me — because Amazon refuses to sell my audio:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/the-internet-con-how-to-seize-the-means-of-computation

Amazon owns Audible, the monopoly audiobook platform that controls >90% of the audio market. They require mandatory DRM for every book sold, locking those books forever to Amazon’s monopoly platform. If you break up with Amazon, you have to throw away your entire audiobook library.

That’s a hell of a lot of leverage to hand to any company, let alone a rapacious monopoly that ran a program targeting small publishers called “Project Gazelle,” where execs were ordered to attack indie publishers “the way a cheetah would pursue a sickly gazelle”:

https://www.businessinsider.com/sadistic-amazon-treated-book-sellers-the-way-a-cheetah-would-pursue-a-sickly-gazelle-2013-10

[Image ID: Journalist and novelist Doctorow (Red Team Blues) details a plan for how to break up Big Tech in this impassioned and perceptive manifesto….Doctorow’s sense of urgency is contagious -Publishers Weekly]

I won’t sell my work with DRM, because DRM is key to the enshittification of the internet. Enshittification is why the old, good internet died and became “five giant websites filled with screenshots of the other four” (h/t Tom Eastman). When a tech company can lock in its users and suppliers, it can drain value from both sides, using DRM and other lock-in gimmicks to keep their business even as they grow ever more miserable on the platform.

Here is how platforms die: first, they are good to their users; then they abuse their users to make things better for their business customers; finally, they abuse those business customers to claw back all the value for themselves. Then, they die:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/21/potemkin-ai/#hey-guys

[Image ID: A brilliant barn burner of a book. Cory is one of the sharpest tech critics, and he shows with fierce clarity how our computational future could be otherwise -Kate Crawford, author of The Atlas of AI”]

The Internet Con isn’t just an analysis of where enshittification comes from: it’s a detailed, shovel-ready policy prescription for halting enshittification, throwing it into reverse and bringing back the old, good internet.

How do we do that? With interoperability: the ability to plug new technology into those crapulent, decaying platform. Interop lets you choose which parts of the service you want and block the parts you don’t (think of how an adblocker lets you take the take-it-or-leave “offer” from a website and reply with “How about nah?”):

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/07/adblocking-how-about-nah

But interop isn’t just about making platforms less terrible — it’s an explosive charge that demolishes walled gardens. With interop, you can leave a social media service, but keep talking to the people who stay. With interop, you can leave your mobile platform, but bring your apps and media with you to a rival’s service. With interop, you can break up with Amazon, and still keep your audiobooks.

So, if interop is so great, why isn’t it everywhere?

Well, it used to be. Interop is how Microsoft became the dominant operating system:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/06/adversarial-interoperability-reviving-elegant-weapon-more-civilized-age-slay

[Image ID: Nobody gets the internet-both the nuts and bolts that make it hum and the laws that shaped it into the mess it is-quite like Cory, and no one’s better qualified to deliver us a user manual for fixing it. That’s The Internet Con: a rousing, imaginative, and accessible treatise for correcting our curdled online world. If you care about the internet, get ready to dedicate yourself to making interoperability a reality. -Brian Merchant, author of Blood in the Machine]

It’s how Apple saved itself from Microsoft’s vicious campaign to destroy it:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/06/adversarial-interoperability-reviving-elegant-weapon-more-civilized-age-slay

Every tech giant used interop to grow, and then every tech giant promptly turned around and attacked interoperators. Every pirate wants to be an admiral. When Big Tech did it, that was progress; when you do it back to Big Tech, that’s piracy. The tech giants used their monopoly power to make interop without permission illegal, creating a kind of “felony contempt of business model” (h/t Jay Freeman).

The Internet Con describes how this came to pass, but, more importantly, it tells us how to fix it. It lays out how we can combine different kinds of interop requirements (like the EU’s Digital Markets Act and Massachusetts’s Right to Repair law) with protections for reverse-engineering and other guerrilla tactics to create a system that is strong without being brittle, hard to cheat on and easy to enforce.

What’s more, this book explains how to get these policies: what existing legislative, regulatory and judicial powers can be invoked to make them a reality. Because we are living through the Great Enshittification, and crises erupt every ten seconds, and when those crises occur, the “good ideas lying around” can move from the fringes to the center in an eyeblink:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/12/only-a-crisis/#lets-gooooo

[Image ID: Thoughtfully written and patiently presented, The Internet Con explains how the promise of a free and open internet was lost to predatory business practices and the rush to commodify every aspect of our lives. An essential read for anyone that wants to understand how we lost control of our digital spaces and infrastructure to Silicon Valley’s tech giants, and how we can start fighting to get it back. -Tim Maughan, author of INFINITE DETAIL]

After all, we’ve known Big Tech was rotten for years, but we had no idea what to do about it. Every time a Big Tech colossus did something ghastly to millions or billions of people, we tried to fix the tech company. There’s no fixing the tech companies. They need to burn. The way to make users safe from Big Tech predators isn’t to make those predators behave better — it’s to evacuate those users:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/18/urban-wildlife-interface/#combustible-walled-gardens

I’ve been campaigning for human rights in the digital world for more than 20 years; I’ve been EFF’s European Director, representing the public interest at the EU, the UN, Westminster, Ottawa and DC. This is the subject I’ve devoted my life to, and I live my principles. I won’t let my books be sold with DRM, which means that Audible won’t carry my audiobooks. My agent tells me that this decision has cost me enough money to pay off my mortgage and put my kid through college. That’s a price I’m willing to pay if it means that my books aren’t enshittification bait.

But not selling on Audible has another cost, one that’s more important to me: a lot of readers prefer audiobooks and 9 out of 10 of those readers start and end their searches on Audible. When they don’t find an author there, they assume no audiobook exists, period. It got so bad I put up an audiobook on Amazon — me, reading an essay, explaining how Audible rips off writers and readers. It’s called “Why None of My Audiobooks Are For Sale on Audible”:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/25/can-you-hear-me-now/#acx-ripoff

[Image ID: Doctorow has been thinking longer and smarter than anyone else I know about how we create and exchange value in a digital age. -Douglas Rushkoff, author of Present Shock]

To get my audiobooks into readers’ ears, I pre-sell them on Kickstarter. This has been wildly successful, both financially and as a means of getting other prominent authors to break up with Amazon and use crowdfunding to fill the gap. Writers like Brandon Sanderson are doing heroic work, smashing Amazon’s monopoly:

https://www.brandonsanderson.com/guest-editorial-cory-doctorow-is-a-bestselling-author-but-audible-wont-carry-his-audiobooks/

And to be frank, I love audiobooks, too. I swim every day as physio for a chronic pain condition, and I listen to 2–3 books/month on my underwater MP3 player, disappearing into an imaginary world as I scull back and forth in my public pool. I’m able to get those audiobooks on my MP3 player thanks to Libro.fm, a DRM-free store that supports indie booksellers all over the world:

https://blog.libro.fm/a-qa-with-mark-pearson-libro-fm-ceo-and-co-founder/

Producing my own audiobooks has been a dream. Working with Skyboat Media, I’ve gotten narrators like @wilwheaton​, Amber Benson, @neil-gaiman​ and Stefan Rudnicki for my work:

https://craphound.com/shop/

[Image ID: “This book is the instruction manual Big Tech doesn’t want you to read. It deconstructs their crummy products, undemocratic business models, rigged legal regimes, and lies. Crack this book and help build something better. -Astra Taylor, author of Democracy May Not Exist, but We’ll Miss It When Its Gone”]

But for this title, I decided that I would read it myself. After all, I’ve been podcasting since 2006, reading my own work aloud every week or so, even as I traveled the world and gave thousands of speeches about the subject of this book. I was excited (and a little trepedatious) at the prospect, but how could I pass up a chance to work with director Gabrielle de Cuir, who has directed everyone from Anne Hathaway to LeVar Burton to Eric Idle?

Reader, I fucking nailed it. I went back to those daily recordings fully prepared to hate them, but they were good — even great (especially after my engineer John Taylor Williams mastered them). Listen for yourself!

https://archive.org/details/cory_doctorow_internet_con_chapter_01

I hope you’ll consider backing this Kickstarter. If you’ve ever read my free, open access, CC-licensed blog posts and novels, or listened to my podcasts, or come to one of my talks and wished there was a way to say thank you, this is it. These crowdfunders make my DRM-free publishing program viable, even as audiobooks grow more central to a writer’s income and even as a single company takes over nearly the entire audiobook market.

Backers can choose from the DRM-free audiobook, DRM-free ebook (EPUB and MOBI) and a hardcover — including a signed, personalized option, fulfilled through the great LA indie bookstore Book Soup:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/the-internet-con-how-to-seize-the-means-of-computation

What’s more, these ebooks and audiobooks are unlike any you’ll get anywhere else because they are sold without any terms of service or license agreements. As has been the case since time immemorial, when you buy these books, they’re yours, and you are allowed to do anything with them that copyright law permits — give them away, lend them to friends, or simply read them with any technology you choose.

As with my previous Kickstarters, backers can get their audiobooks delivered with an app (from libro.fm) or as a folder of MP3s. That helps people who struggle with “sideloading,” a process that Apple and Google have made progressively harder, even as they force audiobook and ebook sellers to hand over a 30% app tax on every dollar they make:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/red-team-blues-another-audiobook-that-amazon-wont-sell/posts/3788112

Enshittification is rotting every layer of the tech stack: mobile, payments, hosting, social, delivery, playback. Every tech company is pulling the rug out from under us, using the chokepoints they built between audiences and speakers, artists and fans, to pick all of our pockets.

The Internet Con isn’t just a lament for the internet we lost — it’s a plan to get it back. I hope you’ll get a copy and share it with the people you love, even as the tech platforms choke off your communities to pad their quarterly numbers.

Next weekend (Aug 4-6), I'll be in Austin for Armadillocon, a science fiction convention, where I'm the Guest of Honor:

https://armadillocon.org/d45/

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this thread to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/31/seize-the-means-of-computation/#the-internet-con

[Image ID: My forthcoming book 'The Internet Con: How to Seize the Means of Computation' in various editions: Verso hardcover, audiobook displayed on a phone, and ebook displayed on an e-ink reader.]

#pluralistic #trustbusting #big tech #gift guide #kickstarter #the internet con #books #audiobooks #enshitiffication #disenshittification #crowdfunders #seize the means of computation #audible #amazon #verso

[syrinq]

thinking about the fact that i do like forgotton realms-adjecent (fantasy equivalent of star wars-sized ip) games but then i have to grab a broom and hit anyone appearing out of the shadows who goes "now play dnd (or any ttrpg) with me" extremely violently so they remain in the dark for another 5 million years

#HOMIE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND IT'S THE FUCKING TTRPG AND ENTIRE MEDIUM ASPECT AND MATH PART AND RANDOM WACKYNESS THAT I LOATHE #IF I PLAYED DND I WOULD BE ONE OF THOSE “BY THE RULE” NERDS BECAUSE IF YOU RANDOMLY PULL OUT A BULLSHIT WAY TO UNDERMINE THE DM'S EFFORTS #WITHOUT THEIR APPROVAL THEN GOD HELP YOU! #anyway ttrpgs arent my thing whatsoever and i'm actually surprised some people do not seem to be understanding that despite the fact #why yes. i do like fantasy and any setting very much if executed well #anyway forgotten realms lore is not one of those things. is anyone going to tell me the real gist of the 'multiverse' that really seem to b #just a case of multiple galaxies and planes/dimensions or are you just gping to throw 3 in-universe cosmology maps at me #there really should be a distinction between how it really is and in-universe explanations because that really is the way i dig it #unfortunately. i have yet to See One IP do it That Way and also explaib Why in Intricate Nice Details #I love bitches who explain Why and Cause And Effect and not just give me raw facts data numbers through historical events #yeah if you can tell me exactly why this species loathes x or y or evolved to be this way then great! i love you very much! #otherwise fuck off because no reasoning and 'it just is' reads as 'this is just cool to me' or 'im too lazy to think abt it' or the #adult bullshit excuse of 'well because i said so!' #YEAH OKAY FINE YOU DONT NEED TO EXPLAIN THE NITTYGRITTY OF EVERYTHING BUT BOY! DO I LOVE REASONING AS TO WHY SOMETHING ACTS/LOOKS/DOES/IS! #OTHERWISE? MAKES 0 SENSE TO ME. THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT #why call it forgotten REALMS if your biggest focus is one fucking continent (faerun) #this also goes for very real stuff btw. like okay i get why a game can work essentially on a stupid display because it all comes down to #sand doing math and true/false statements etcetera. but as to how consciousness forms into a growing clump of cells. who knows #i also don't understand the concept that we need opposites for fucking everything in human-made theories like newton's law #or an explanation for 'holes' in THEORETICAL frameworks. such as what dividing 0 by 0 is. and then hanging onto those frameworks as if #they're 100% real and truth. mate it's truth from the perspective of humans but i guess i'll just not go meta here. this is dumb