#im a fucking mess tbh and barely holding it together but these next couple of weeks are going to be the best of his life

[dogbunni]

I have a couple of asks in my ask box and I would like to say thank u I love u mwah kiss on the forehead for all of u and I WILL reply I promise but rn my cat is dying and has maybe 2 weeks left to live so I have zero brain space rn. devoting the next 2 weeks to snuggling my boy I hope u all understand

#i rly do have so many thoughts abt these particular asks and i want to wait until im less greif stricken and stressed #bc rn u would get a lacklustre reply at best #this is why ive been quiet lately #he's been battling seizures for a while now #ive thrown more money at this problem than i care to admit #but he hasnt responded to any of the meds and we are simply out of options #so rn its just back and forth to the vet assessing his quality of life and trying to make the right decision #regarding when do i let him go #putting quality of life over quantity here #he's been going downhill fast this past week and he had a scary fall #the stress of constant seizures has led to major overgrooming issues that ive somewhat gotten under control now but was very bad #so what little time he has left i am just going to make him the focus of my attention and put together a bucket list of sorts to go through #before i let him go for a big nap #im a fucking mess tbh and barely holding it together but these next couple of weeks are going to be the best of his life #ill make damn sure of it #im going to take him mcdonalds drive thru and get him chicken nuggets #he's been having outdoors time on his harness and leash every day and he's been loving it even tho he's too weak and tired to do much #he just sniffs some plants real good #he's been sleeping on my chest almost constantly #and he gets all the treats he wants bc there are no long term consequences anymore </3 #im going to the supermarket on friday to get him some fresh fish from the fish counter #and im going to take him for a drive with the window down so he can (safely and harnessed) stick his head out the window #im watching him sleep rn and trying not to start sobbing and wake him up #these seizures are robbing the best years of his life from him and i hate it so much #i cant help but feel like ive failed him #i shouldve done more #spent more money #idk #i wasnt trying to vent but oh my god it just all came out #i love this cat so much he is my boy my baby my babyboy

[mccnyoongi]

the yoongi thigh riding drabble 😫😫😫 sis ur tryna kill me alsooo i know u said ur trying not to go for the “riding yoongi in his studio chair” trope however i FULLY support indulging in this trope 😉 i rlly love ur writing tho omg 🥰

+ anon said:  hi im uh read your latest work and rEALLY LIKED IT so can i please request riding yoongi in his studio chair??? thanks if you would posts it!

+ another anon said: yoongi drabble, were where y / n and he have sex in his studio, pls?

hsfjksfh TWIST MY ARm why dont u !! (i told yall id do nasty soon) now i wanna write a multi-chaptered undergroundrapper!yoongi sjkfjsdf 

⇢ word count: 2K+ (lmao)

⇢ warnings: unprotected sex, dom!yoongi, starts SUPER soft then devolves into filth, undergroundrapper!yoongi bc ion like writing idol!au skdfjsdfk, degradation, yoongi’s hands

Yoongi’s passion has always been one of your favourite things about him- if he cares about something, he’ll give his all to it. Thankfully you fall under that category. The only question is whether you’re first or second on the list, constantly competing with his music.

With Yoongi garnering a fair amount of success from his life as an underground rapper, you understand why it’s starting to take over more and more of his life, you really do. You loved Yoongi, you loved his music. But you couldn’t help but start to… miss your boyfriend. A sad irony that you could miss the man who’s been, as of late, spending the majority of his time in his ‘studio,’ aka the spare room of your shared apartment that he said was about a quarter the size of a proper studio. 

How could you miss someone that was less than fifteen feet away from you, two doors away? You weren’t sure that it was possible until now, lying in bed, Yoongi’s side cold and the offensive red light of your bedside alarm clock telling you it’s far past the time your boyfriend promised he’d be in bed by. You sigh, sitting up, knowing that you wouldn’t get any sleep if you just sat there and stewed in your negativity. So instead you’d seek him out.

Thankfully there isn’t a lock on the door, he hasn’t gotten around to putting one in yet. You know the day will come soon, since last time your friends were over, Jungkook and Jimin had managed to sneak their way in, looking like guilty puppies when Yoongi had caught them. 

Lock or not, Yoongi didn’t even hear you, ears covered by his almost comically oversized headphones, his dyed blonde head bobbing to whatever beat he’s working on at the moment. You can’t help but smile fondly at the sight of your sweet boy so immersed in the thing he’s dedicated his life to.

He’s only made aware of your presence when you wrap your arms around his shoulders from behind. He finally takes those ridiculous headphones off, pausing the track and letting you rest your chin on the top of his head.

You look at the two monitors in front of him as though you have any idea what’s going on on the screens. “Hard at work, huh genius?”

You feel him cock his head under you and he hums gently, one of his large hands- something about him you first fell in love with when you saw it, pale and slender, gripping a microphone on stage- grabbing at yours. “Sorry,” He mumbles, and you can tell by the timber and the gruffness of his voice that he hasn’t spoken a word since he came into this room a couple of hours ago. “Lose track of time in this room. No windows.”

“S’okay Yoon. Just missed you is all.”

Your words are innocent but they tug at his heart and make him shut his eyes for a moment. He never wants to make you feel like second best, but the way he falls into things sometimes makes him forget that anything else exists in the world. But now he wants to be close to you, to touch you, to make it all up to you. 

“C’mere,” He’s tugging at the hand he has in his grip, and he keeps tugging until you’ve circled around his chair to stand in front of him. “Up on my lap, babe.” An offer you couldn’t refuse. So you don’t.

You’re straddling him now, well-toned but not overtly muscular thighs under you- a familiar and welcoming seat of yours. His warmth is comforting to you and vice versa. “I’ve been neglecting you, haven’t I?” You don’t want to say yes, afraid of hurting his feelings but the pout that graces your features gives it all away.

“I know, baby, I’m sorry,” One of his large hands comes up to cup your face, and he coos softly when you lean and nuzzle into his palm, as if he isn’t thinking of all the filthy and depraved things he’s been missing out on with you while he’s been cooped up in his studio. “‘M gonna make it up to you.”

And then his mouth is on yours, and you’re reminded why you love kissing Min Yoongi so much. He’s careful and intense, every movement backed by the same confidence and dominance he exudes when he’s on stage. It’s when you deepen the kiss, his tongue slipping into your mouth, skilled and tactful, that you realize you weren’t just here for a quick visit.

“Yoongi,” You murmur as soon as he’s pulling back, detaching your mouths. You’re momentarily hypnotized by the string of spit that still connects the two of you, staring at it until it breaks. Yoongi notices this fascination of yours, and give you a smirk you regret ever confessing to him you find sexy. 

“Are you getting all desperate for me, silly girl? Hm?” You can’t help but rut your hips against his own at the words, loving the way they fall out of his mouth so lazily but with as much purpose as a presidential speech. “So needy ‘nd squirmy for me… Love seeing you so fucking desperate, you know.” His hands are travelling up your sleep shirt- aka an old band shirt of his that you had staked your claim over before the two of you had even moved in together.

His hands don’t go where more inexperienced ones might immediately go but instead traverse up and down your back, leaving delicious goosebumps in their wake. You shiver both from the feeling, and from the anticipation of what’s to come. You go to take your shirt off but are stopped by two hands circled around your wrists. “Patience,” Yoongi’s voice is next to your ear now, as he’s pulled you down using the grip he has on you. 

He’s made it clear that while you may be on top of him, he’s the one with control. And he’s fucking revelling in it, you can see it in the sparkle in his eyes as he lets go of your wrists. “Don’t worry, baby, I’ll take care of you, I promise,” You trust him wholeheartedly, and communicate this with a nod. You know he understands when his hands slide down, under your shirt once more, this time staying far lower. 

“Soaking wet and I’ve barely even done anything,” He’s so cocky and you should be annoyed but you can’t find it in you, instead you feel yourself get even hotter at his words. “Panties off, little girl.”

His tone leaves no room for arguing, so you scramble to stand up and follow his demands, panties lost somewhere behind him. You go to get back onto your spot on his lap, missing it already, but are stopped once more by his hands. One is on your waist, holding you steady, only using a portion of its strength and the other is on your face, squishing your cheeks, opening your mouth and pushing your lips out obscenely. 

He looks like he’s still deciding what the hell to do with you, how hard to go. Then he’s cocking his head, brazen smirk back on his face as he pushes you down to your knees. The carpeting immediately makes the position uncomfortable as you feel it grating against the skin of your knees. But any discomfort is immediately quelled, or, at least, forgotten, at the sight and sound of Yoongi undoing his belt in front of you- any thoughts of your knees and carpet burn are replaced with the thoughts of Yoongi’s cock. He had that effect on you.

He chuckled at the look in your eyes, finally releasing himself from the confines of his jeans. He sighs at the release, cold air hitting his skin a shock to his rock hard dick. “Practically fucking drooling for this cock, aren’t you?” You nod earnestly and lean forward, towards his cock where his hand works over it lazily. He grabs a fistful of your hair with his other hand, withholding you from what you really want. “So fucking desperate, you slut. You wanna suck my cock so bad? You better do a good fucking job of it, convince me you deserve it in that slutty cunt of yours.”

You barely have time to think about how quickly he shifted from the sweet, loving Yoongi you normally know to this darker version of Yoongi, the one that comes out whenever he’s properly turned on before his hand that’s fisted in your hair is dragging you toward his achingly hard cock. You open your mouth, ready and willing, and mouth at his tip, letting your spit, your drool, collect and fall over it, dripping down the rest of his impressive length. You pull back to give the tip a gentle kiss, barely holding back a giggle when it jumps angrily at you

He breathes out heavily from his spot above you and yanks you back off his cock. “You wanna be a messy fucking tease? Fine. Open your mouth. Now,” You do as he says, not wanting to anger him further. 

He collects spit in his own mouth, and you're made to sit and wait patiently, hair a mess and mouth wide open. You don’t have to wait long until he spits into your mouth, the act so filthy, so dirty, you can only close your eyes and whimper, so turned on from it all that you can feel your own wetness starting to drip down your thighs. Messy. “Don’t swallow,” He doesn’t need to explain more as he leads you back to his cock.

You let the combination of your and his spit fall onto his cock, the act obscene but astoundingly erotic. You finally start to swallow down his length like you know he wants, your hands coming up to help. Both of his hands are in your hair now, entirely controlling your actions, the speed of which your sucking his cock.

He finally pushes you down as far as he can, your hands falling to his thighs. Your nose is against his stomach, tickled by the sparse amount of hair there. You can barely breathe from this position, but you take it if only for the groans you hear tumble out of his mouth. “Such a good girl, my best fucking slut,” You moan at the praise, the vibrations making his head fall back on his chair. There’s drool covering both him and your face now, tears welling at the corners of your eyes from the intensity, and every second you can feel yourself getting wetter.

His hands fall slack on your hair, but you don’t pull back just yet, instead, taking the opportunity to swallow around him once, twice, three times. He yanks you off of his cock, his breathing ragged and heavy. He looks at you with a half-lidded gaze. “Up.”

It’s only one word, but he doesn’t need anymore, not with a commanding tone like that. You get back on his lap, immediately calmed and comforted by the spot. He finally tears off the shirt, now wrinkled and covered in drool and precum. 

“Now fucking sit on it,” And you can hardly hold yourself back, eagerly lifting yourself up and positioning the head of his cock against your slick entrance. You let yourself fall, the whole of him filling you up perfectly, and so so good.

Yours and Yoongi’s groans mingle together in an unrivalled harmony, the two of you still for a moment as you bask in the feeling. “Being such a good fucking girl,” His hands work up and down your sides. “Now fuck yourself on my cock, and don’t you dare stop. Don’t stop until you full of my fucking cum, ‘till you’re my perfect, messy bitch.”

You start slowly, lifting yourself up until barely an inch is left in your pussy, and drop all the way back down. You continue like this, deep, strong strokes, slowly speeding up until your bouncing on his lap, the obscene sounds of the two of you filling the room, your very own symphony when combined with your groans.

“So good, baby, so fucking good, bouncing on my cock, gonna make such a fucking mess out of you, yeah?” He’s lifting his hips to meet yours, making every downstroke that much more intense. 

He lands a spank on your ass, then another, the sharp pain only serving to make you wetter and bounce on him harder. He chuckles in between moans. “You like that, huh? You’ll take anything I give you, ‘cause you’re my perfect little whore.”

You can feel the crescendo coming, building up like a tsunami. “Yoongi- Yoongi please, please, you have to let me come,” Any other time you’d have reservations about begging, but when it came to Yoongi, all pride was left at the door. “Need it.”

“I have to? I don’t have to do anything, whore,” His hand is back on your face, lips puckering out again. You nod in desperate agreement. He’s collecting spit in his mouth once more and you open your mouth wider in anticipation of what’s about to come. He spits in your mouth again, this time wanting you to swallow. It’s a dirty act, so vulgar, and you both groan at the site.

“You see that, slut? You swallow my spit, bounce on my cock and cum for me, all when I fucking tell you to? You understand?”“Yes, Yoongi I do, I’m sorry, please, I’m sorry, jus’ lemme cum.”

“Yeah, yeah, do it, fucking come for me.”

And cum you do, the feeling washing over you like nothing else, eyes closing and your head burrowing itself into Yoongi’s neck, the smell of his sweat comforting. You can hear Yoongi talking himself and you through your orgasms, but the words are too much for you to focus on. You can only feel his cum fill you up, already starting to spill out of you.

You’re both panting in the aftermath, his hands, once harsh, now softly caressing your back. The two of you are slick and sticky with sweat, but it’s the last thing on your minds.

“You still need to work on that song or are you finally gonna come to bed?”

“Please, neither of us are leaving that bed for the next 48 hours, besides to get the door for the take out we order.”

“Sounds perfect.”

#Anonymous #bts smut #yoongi smut #yoongi x reader #bts drabble #yoongi drabble #baby writes #ik this is over 1000 words i really couldn't help myself #this is where i've been the last 2 days #sfkjfshd yikes!

[horansqueen]

AM Conversations : chapter 25

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -3.9k. -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- if you want to be notified when this is updated, please message me or leave a comment!

- you can send me questions and theories and comments. tbh they all make me SO SO SO SOOOO HAPPY! and make me want to write more! you can also tell me if there are things you WANT to happen. you never know, i may add it :P

- thanks for being patient btw! i work a lot these days and will work even more in the next few weeks (until halloween) so i may not update as often as i’d like. :(

-please, message me, give me feedbacks, it would mean sooo much to me!

Chapter 25 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

I had never felt so many butterflies in my stomach before. Not only was Niall holding my hand and making me twirl around like he had romantic feelings for me, but the taste of his lips pressed on mine was still lingering on my mouth and I never wanted it to leave.

It was completely different than the kiss we had shared while playing 'spin the bottle'. I didn't know why but that kiss was full of raw emotions, like he couldn't contain them and had no idea how to express them. It was exactly like he had put all these feelings into this simple kiss. it was awkward and not at all romantic but it was a kiss nonetheless, a kiss that seemed to mean a lot to him, almost as much as it meant to me.

I didn't know how many times I had licked my lips since that kiss, if only to taste him again and I kept asking myself if i could kiss him again when his taste would have left completely from my mouth.

We sat in the already dark room and it felt nice when I realized it was almost empty except for a few teens in the front and a couple on the right side. Niall moved his beanie on his head to put it back in place and I stared at him. The thing that surprised me the most was to realize that I was even more in love with him now than I was 5 weeks ago when i decided to take a break from this friendship. It didn't seem normal and I couldn't help but think that my love for him should have decreased. When I saw him at my door, everything flooded back, almost drowning me, and I knew at that exact moment that I'd have to keep Niall Horan in my life forever.

"Don't forget," he whispered when the lights dimmed down. "No spoiler."

I held my breath when I felt him grab my hand and intertwine our fingers. I couldn't help but look down at our hands together and I had to swallow the lump of hope and happiness in my throat. I couldn't let my imagination run too wild or too far. After all, maybe it meant nothing. Was it just like this kiss we shared? Was this just a way to show me that he had missed me?

I was glad I had seen this movie before because I couldn't focus on anything else than our fingers together and when his thumb started brushing softly the back of my hand, I almost lost it.

I kept glancing at him, especially when he laughed. The way his mouth opened, the way his head moved back and the special sound of his laughter was bringing me joy I couldn't explain. I was with Harry, and he was with Maya, but neither of these relationships felt right the way this moment with Niall felt.

I looked down at our intertwined fingers for so long that I barely noticed when the lights turned on again but when I looked up, Niall was sending me a big smile and I couldn't help but smiled back at him. He didn't talk but got up, pulling on my arm again and making me chuckle.

I knew it was going to hurt when I was going to fall off my happy cloud but I didn't want to think about it. He brought me out of the room but it's only when we both reached the parking that our phones started beeping. His especially wouldn't stop ringing and I brought mine close to my face to see a few text messages from Harry. One of them was a link that I clicked immediately and my heart stopped when I saw the headlines of an online article.

'Is Niall Horan dating long-time friend?'

"Oh, fuck." I let out when Niall stopped walking suddenly.

He held my fingers tighter to make me stopped and moved in front of him, looking up from my phone. He was still staring at his screen, motionless and silent, and I decided to look at the article again, scrolling down to see horrible pictures of me. Niall looked great, as usual, and I tried to hide a smile when I saw that some of the picture were us holding hands, hugging and laughing together. For once, I couldn’t really blame whoever started that rumor : we honestly looked like we were together.

"Maya is literally lashing out at me." he pointed out without enthusiasm. "She's fucking pissed."

I sighed at the mention of her name but my eyes roamed quickly on Harry's messages.

'Is it true? I normally don't give credit to these kind of things but with the pictures I am unsure.'

'Call me okay?'

'I hope you're safe'

The right corner of my lips moved up in a sad smile and I quickly typed an answer.

'Can you come home in about half an hour?'

I looked up from my phone only to see Niall, his hand on his head, gripping his beanie a bit too tight, and the first thing that came to my mind was how bad I wanted to feel his lips on mine again. Of course, the articles bothered me a bit, and I felt guilty about Harry, but having Niall so close and still holding my fingers seemed to surpass and ease every other emotions inside me.

"I hate doing this to you, Liv, but I think I'm gonna have to go and solve the mess these paps made in my life again."

I felt like shit knowing he was about to leave me to go see Maya but I could understand why he was doing it. I would lie if I said it didn't bother me and I tried not to let myself hope that he'd choose me over her because even if I had no idea if his relationship would survive this, I knew he had to explain things witn her. I just wish I knew what he was about to tell her.

"No, it's okay, Harry and I need to talk too." I let out, shrugging, trying to hide how much it hurt me to know he was leaving. "We can just text each other after."

At my words, Niall looked up and sent me a smile. I had missed that smile more than I would have thought.

"So that's it, yea?" he asked, raising his eyebrows at me. "We're back? Things are going to be exactly the way they used to be?"

I had no idea if things really could ever be the same again and I wanted more than that. I aspired to more than that when it came to Niall. But I just shrugged again and nodded.

"We can try."

Once again, he pulled on my fingers and wrapping both his arms around me as we were both still holding our phones. I felt his cheek press on the top of my head and it made me smile, After a few seconds, he kissed my hair and moved away.

Niall put his phone back in his pocket and I just held my tight as we walked to my car and hopped in, remaining silent. I wanted to say something but I didn't know what and when I stopped at a red light, I felt his hand on my thigh and held my breath. The warmth of his palm felt incredible and I could feel my whole body start throbbing but the only throbbing I could think about was the intense on between my legs.

I blinked a few times, trying to get back to my senses and remembering I was actually driving, and glanced next to me too look at him.

"Hey, you think you'll be okay?"

I nodded a few times and his fingers slipped away from me, making me inhaled deeply. Were we always affectionate like that together or was this new? I didn't have time to ask myself any more question because when I parked in my driveway, I saw Harry waiting for me in front of my apartment building and frowned a bit, wondering if half an hour had already passed.

We got out of the car and Niall walked up to his friend, extending his hand to him. Harry just glanced at it but sighed, slapping it and grabbing it before bringing Niall into a hug. I was not sure what it meant but the look on Harry's face made my heart break in my chest. At first I thought he looked sad but the closer I was getting the more I realized that he actually seemed resigned, and that couldn't be good.

"Sorry mate, can't stay, got a few things to solve." I heard Niall say.

Quickly, he turned on his feet and grabbed my waist, pulling me closer and kissing my cheek.

"Text me." he whispered, walking past me but turning around a few seconds later to wave at us.

Harry and I both waited until his car was out of sight to look at each other again and the smile we both sent each other was pathetic. I unlocked the door and we walked up the stairs in silence. It's only when I brought him a beer as he was sitting on the couch that he dared to talk.

"Thank you."

His voice was low, lower than usual, and I swallowed hard.

"Look, Harry, nothing happened with Niall." I felt guilty because this was half a lie. "We just talked, went to the movies, and decided to be friends again. I know those pictures are weird but you know, it's just Niall and I..."

I stopped talking, wondering if he was even listening to me. He was turning and twisting his beer in his hands, his eyes glued to it and when he sighed, I felt my heart jump up in my throat.

"Do you think I don't notice how you look at him?"

I held my breath at his confession and my lips parted in shock. Did I just imagine that? The whole room seemed to move and I had to grip the arm of the couch to get my balance back, even if I was sitting.

"W-What?"

"And my fear is that every time we're together, you just wish you were with him instead."

"What are you talking about?" I asked in a whisper after a few seconds of silence.

At this point, his eyes moved up and he turned his gaze into mine, making my whole body feel on fire. I didn't want to have this conversation, I didn't want to talk about my love for Niall and I didn't want to feel like shit for hurting Harry, even if I did. Still, I couldn't get myself to regret seeing Niall again.

"No, Olivia please, don't." he let out, moving slightly closer to me. "You can't deny it, not to me. You owe me that, don't you think?"

It would be so much easier if he was screaming at me. It would be so much easier if he was pissed, yelling, and calling me names. But he was sitting very close to me and I could read how hurt he was and I wanted to lie to him. I wanted to tell him it was not true, that I only had feelings for him, and that I wanted us to tell the world we were dating. But I couldn't get myself to lie to the only man who had always been honest and kind with me. He was right, he deserved the truth. In fact, he deserved so much better than me.

I nodded, staring in his eyes, and he sighed, opening his beer quickly and taking a long sip of it. I took it off his hand and drank from it too before giving it back to him. That was how we always drank our beers. One at a time and together. And I liked it. It felt great to share something with someone... a connection that went beyond friendship. But I also knew it was not love.

"You've always loved him, right?" he asked again, leaning against the couch and looking at me.

I tried to hold his gaze but I couldn't and I closed my eyes, sighing low.

"Yes."

It was the very first time I admitted it out loud and to someone else. And it felt so right and true that I felt my heart twist in my chest at my secret being finally revealed.

"I think I always knew but I didn't want to know." Harry added, making me open my eyes again and frown before he continued. "Do you remember the first time we had sex?"

Of course I remembered, it was only a few weeks ago, but instead to mention it, I nodded, pressing my lips together. I remembered everything. From the way he felt inside me to the sound of my cellphone ringing in the middle of it because Niall was calling me.

"I told you I'd wake you up in the middle of the night to do it again. Because I wanted you. Because I felt like I had somehow failed you the first time or something. And when I woke up in the middle of the night, I started touching you. I kissed your neck and moved over you. And I even whispered your name a few times."

I frowned, wondering why I didn't remember that and if I even ever woke up at all. I couldn't believe the touch of Harry's hands and lips didn't wake me up and I remember wondering why he had not tried to have sex with me again during the night when I opened my eyes in the morning. I came to the conclusion that he was too tired and I didn't think more of it but now that he was mentioning it, I knew there was more to it.

"I stopped when I heard you talk. You were whispering his name very low."

It felt like Harry had dropped a bomb between us and I suddenly felt nauseous. Did I really do that? Did I really whisper Niall's name while I was in bed with Harry? After we had sex for the first time? The thought was horrible and I emptied my lungs quickly, still staring at me.

"I am... so fucking sorry, Harry."

"No, it's okay." he shook his head with a frown before his lips curled into a sad smile. "I had hope for us. I wanted us to work. So I stayed that night to give us an other chance. And we had it, we had that chance, Olivia."

His eyes moved up to look into mine and I tilted my head. He was gorgeous, and I knew I had feelings for him. I wanted him to be happy, I wanted to be in his arms, I wanted to spend time with him and kiss him.

"But today I realized that this chance was only possible if Niall was not between us." he explained. "And he will always be there."

He raised his shoulders up and chuckled without amusement before shaking his head. He didn't have to explain anything, I knew exactly what he meant and I also knew that he was right. There was nothing I could say or do that would change things or make all this okay. Nothing at all.

"Everyone knows you love him, I just didn't want to see it. I wanted to try anyway."

"No, not everyone." I pointed out, feeling bad for bringing this conversation on Niall and I while it should be only me apologizing to Harry for hours.

"He knows and he loves you too."

My heart skipped a beat and I raised my eyebrows at Harry, my eyes roaming on his face.

"Deep down, he knows. He's just scared." he added, "He's scared to ruin what you two have, he's scared it won't last, that it will be a mistake. He's scared of how much he could love you."

I tried to engrave these words in my memory to think about them later and I reached for Harry's hand, getting his attention again as he turned to me.

"What about you, Harry?"

"Are you honestly interested in how I feel?"

I was shocked and a bit mad that he could doubt it. I was not this horrible person who had played him. Yes, I had kept for myself the fact that I was in love with Niall, but I hadn't lied about my feelings for Harry. This was not just an act and Harry was not just a distraction. There was something between us and I wouldn't have wanted to try with him if I didn't think we were a possible match.

"Of course I am, Harry. Do you doubt it?"

He inhaled deeply and shrugged, squeezing my fingers with his.

"I really like you, Olivia. Perhaps I could have fallen in love with you."

His confession took me by surprise and I held my breath as he moved his face closer to look into my eyes. I felt like he was reading my soul and he kept silent for a whole minute before talking again.

"But I guess we'll never know."

That's when I realized that Harry was breaking up with me and the sensation of emptiness inside of me felt like it could never be filled again, like the void inside me was a black hole that would never disappear. I felt myself tear up but I couldn't move, like hypnotized by what was happening to me. I didn't want to blink but i did eventually and a tear slid down my right cheek, making Harry sigh as he watched it fall.

"Don't cry." he almost begged in a whisper, bringing his hand to cup my face as his thumb brushed against my cheek to wipe the tear. "You'll be fine. We'll both be okay."

I didn't really know if i'd be okay without Harry. I knew we had been together only for a few weeks but I felt like we had years of memories and nothing but good ones. Could a love story really end before it even started?

"Would you hate me if I said I don't want to lose you? That.. I don't want this to end?" I admitted in a whisper. "Because I don't want to."

His eyes moved gently and slowly on my face, stopping at my lips, and he bent down slowly, still holding my face, until his lips pressed against mine. The taste of caramel came back, washing away the indescribable taste of Niall's lips, and when Harry parted my lips to kiss me deeper, I realized that this kiss was our last one.

One of his hands moved down to my neck and I had to stop myself from whimpering in his mouth. It was the softest and slowest kiss I had ever got and I let him lead, my eyes closed, as his tongue moved against mine and his fingertips brushed against my skin.

I wanted to apologize to him, tell him I was sorry for making him go through that, tell him that I was sorry for not being able to throw myself into this relationship completely, but I didn't. I remembered how I felt when Niall apologized before kissing me and I didn't want Harry and I to break up on this kind of feeling, especially not after a kiss.

"You're incredible." I breathed against his mouth, my lips brushing against his. "Beautiful, kind, sweet, understanding. You're everything I ever wished for, Harry. You're perfect, I hope you know that."

I feel his lips curl into a smile against mine and I brush my mouth against his, leaving a soft kiss. I knew that when one of us would back away, it would be over, and I didn't want it to be me. If I wanted to be real, though, I also didn't want it to be him.

"My biggest wish is that someday, you'll realize that you're beautiful, in and out." he replied very low, his deep voice sending a shiver cross my back. "You're a real catch, only you can't see it."

I chuckled very low and kissed him again gently. This time, he answered my kiss but let his fingers slide down my arm as his other hand was still pressed against my cheek, his warm palm burning on my skin. I don't know how long we stayed like that, as if neither of us wanted to move, but when he finally pulled away to look at me, the sad expression on his face made me want to cry again. I knew I was looking at him the exact same way though and I swallowed hard to keep my tears in.

"I'm gonna need some time." he admitted softly. "But then, if you need a friend, I'll always be there."

This time, I couldn't stop the tears from flooding my cheeks. I stared at him until my vision was too blurry to see anything and I sniffed, nodding gently.

"I'm sorry, kitten, I didn't want to make you cry." he added, wiping my tears again. "But I think you know that this is the right thing to do."

"I know." I murmured, scared that my voice would break. "I'm gonna miss you."

Getting up was painful and walking Harry to the door even worse. He turned around and put his hands in his pockets as he looked down at me, his big green eyes scanning me as he it was the very last time and I think it was. Why did I have to go through so many loss all at the same time? Watching someone walk out of your life was probably the most hurtful thing to ever experiment even if deep down, you know it's for the better.

My heart was aching when he kissed my lips one last time and turned around. I heard him walk down the stairs but I waited until I heard the door at the bottom of the building open and close to start sobbing. I closed the door and walked slowly to the kitchen, grabbing a bottom of wine without even caring to take a glass.

I cried alone in my living room as I was downing as much wine as I could in total silence except for the sobs I couldn't stop. Niall was with his girlfriend, Harry was gone, and I was alone. I had not felt that lonely in a long time and I didn't remember how bad it felt. I waited about half an hour but finally grabbed my phone and with shaky hands, I texted my best friend.

'Harry and I are over.'

I just wanted Niall to take me in his arms and let me cry. I needed him to tell me everything would be okay, that I would get over it easily and quickly, but I couldn't ask him that, because he was with Maya and he had his own problems to solve. I didn't know if I was 'a catch' like Harry had said but that's not how I felt at all. I just needed someone to catch my heart as It was falling... Before It'd hit the ground and break into million of pieces.

#niall horan #niall horan smut #niall horan fluff #niall horan fanfic #niall horan fan fic #niall horan fanfiction #niall horan writing #niall horan story #harry styles #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles story #harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fan fic #harry styles fanfiction #my fanfics #i wrote this quick because i felt super bad for taking so long to post chapter 24 #i hope you guys enjoy this one <33

[caandlelit]

hqb has been trolling us from the start, sticking pictures of oikawas face but not delivering on the seijou chapter this is like queerbaiting i am actually angry

i also got another ask for matsuhana and listen, to both of u and every other matsuhana stan, ive got you. cant believe people got tired of them what do you mean theyre not in the manga anymore shut up and love them

theyve respectively worked so hard to look like slackers and they are 

theyre so lazy neither of them have any of their shit together before coffee

 hanamaki takes it 'black like my fuckin soul' and matsukawa takes it "like i take my men. sweet as fuck-no ow fuck stop-stop hiTTING ME-" 

no one has complained as loud and as full of energy as makki about oikawa forcing early practices

 watari, barely breathing: h-hows he even,,,,,,got the fuggin energy,,,to yell as l o u d as that,,,,what is he an animal

 makki is lazy as fuck because he doesnt see the fucking point but he is still the most energetic

 like iwa will be on the floor and makki will be dragging his feet forward because once he starts hes determined

 hes shouting filthy curses at oikawa while doing receives but matsukawa grabs him weakly and pulls himself up to his full height only to drop onto him heavy as fuck

 "oW shIT issei what the fUCK" 

and doesnt even bother whispering when he says that he'll 'suck you off if you shut the fuck up' 

their perfect day is lying in bed together for hours, getting up eventually to brush their teeth and then pancakes, and then netflix and more lazing about and fucking, baking cookies at three am because they cant sleep because they slept all day

 theyre spontaneous!! its cute 

dates happen on the spot, no planning unless matsuns in a mood and wants to romance makki 

but matsukawa in a suit just makes makki's brain stop working and tbh half of the wooing is just the suit 

"omg you didnt have to do all this,, hey turn around i wanna see the suit from the back- hOLY SHIT,,,wh,,,your baCK and sh-shoulders,,,,,,fuck,,,,,that flat ass-"

'heY-'

 speaking of matsukawa is a saP 

you'll hear me shouting this from the rooftops right next to one hanamaki takahiro 

"he's actually a romantic its tragic i thought he was a badass fuckboy who rides a motorbike but nope im stuck with someone who feels the need to kiss me goodmorning and text me goodnight-" 

"oh fuck oFF you'd cry if i didnt at this point you loser" 

'alright stop then i dont care' 

"nah you love me. and thats why i wont stop. because i love you too" 

'... thERE HE GOES AGAIN, SAPPING THE PLACE UP, WHAT A LOSER' 

"yOU CANT HIDE THAT BLUSH FROM ME BABY-" 

so they are stupidly domesticated and also very very clingy they are That Couple™ 

they have a couples instagram and everything

 oikawa got jealous and refused to speak to anyone 

and then he made an instagram for his dog and matsukawa lost his shit

"babe please lets get a dog please holy shit imagine the likES BABY DO IT FOR THE LIKES

""issei what the fuck we're not married yet we cant have a dog together get a hold of yourself be a man and get through this-" 

"...i heard that yet you cant steamroll on i wont let you" 

"what are you talking about lmao go away issei,,w-what do you mean i didnt say-"

 "ill get on my knees right now. ill even ignore the fact that you said the word 'lmao' out loud" 

'whats the catch' 

"........just,,,,,,,,,,please lets get a corgi-" 

theyre both stubborn but they never fight ever 

theyve had onE big fight and it was over a misunderstanding and it was terribly minor and because they were both stressed

 they yelled and oikawa and iwaizumi had to pull them away and neither if them spoke for the whole day

 and they felt so so bad 

 neither of them could sleep

matsukawa decided to run all the way to hanamakis house 

five streets away but, a truly horrible, dramatic, stupid decision 

makki couldnt yell at him for it 

because he stopped a few blocks to his house and stared 

there he was in all his sweatpants and bubblegum pink bedhead glory

makki was standing there with wide eyes, panting like he'd also been running 

matsukawa, dazedly: you hate running 

hanamaki, winded as fuck: what the,,,what the fuck,,,,,what kind of

romcom bullshit- holy shit- 

theyre walking towards each other and start talking at the same time 

"issei you stop right there you fucker dont you dare-"

 "technically im more sorry because i started running earlier-" 

"-no shut up thats just your long legs im so sorry-"

 "-fuck naw you cant have this im the sappy one right let me have my grand romantic gesture goddammit i love you-" 

'-issei you'll stop and let me apologize tearily and cry and ask if i can make it up to you with sex if you know whats good for you please i felt so shitty-' 

"- that sounds hot as fuck and i love you, im so in love with you, i love everything about you-mMPH" 

queue hanamaki stepping forward and leaning up to cup his face in both hands and kissing him quiet 

matsukawa fondly recalls it as 'literally the most romantic thing he's done' 

hanamaki fondly recalls it as 'the most teary sex i've ever had, jesus christ we were a mess' 

ive got more but i dont have it in me to write it out atm ill be back tho

#thankyou for this ask and the other one #sorry its late!! #ask #anon #matsuhana #matsukawa issei #hanamaki takahiro #haikyuu #hq #hanamatsu #hc #hcs

[avasilvugh]

Superbabies: I wanna know about arguments in their household! What happens when Kara and Lena fight? What about if the kids fight with the parents? What about between the kids?

oh ho ho okay (i am quite literally rubbing my hands together bc ARGUMENTS R MY SHIT)

so like??  kara and lena dont ever rlly Fight, u know??  no big blow outs, particularly after the kids come along like they bicker sometimes and have deeper arguments but there’s no big blow up bc that’s not healthy and they know it, recognize it.  the few times they’ve had a Big Fight were p early in their relationship when lena was still sort of self-sabotaging and kara was sort of doing the same tbh but then they developed the ever helpful tool of ~healthy communication~ so when they argue, it’s usually p tame

that said, they DO fight sometimes and they dont like......go out of their way to hide it??  bc like its a reality of relationships, you argue sometimes, and they want their kids to see that it happens and that you still love each other at the end of them and they want them to see how to deal with relationship issues healthily??  that’s a big thing for lena tbh, bc she had to learn it all when she was an adult, never had any reference point for what a healthy long term relationship was supposed to look like until kara, rlly, so she rlly wants their kids to know what a solid, healthy, happy relationship looks like

so it usually goes down like this: whatever small disagreements they’ve been having (usually over the same subject or maybe a series of related topics) will kind of build up and then sometimes its kara that starts it by rolling her eyes when lena starts in on it or sometimes its lena snapping at kara but eventually it Starts and it will last for days at a time sometimes bc they both think they’re right or if they know they’re wrong, they’re not willing to admit it Right Then but anyway it will last for a while (their record is three weeks, it happened right after they found out lena was pregnant with finn, it was A Mess), but like??  they still love each other??  kara still makes lena’s coffee in the mornings and lena still picks up a pint of kara’s favorite ice cream bc she saw they were out the other day and like??  tbh thats what the kids take away from it most

but yeah, so they argue in front of the kids sometimes but they never let it get ugly, always know when to say we need to step away from this and come back later, so they will and they’ll cool off and they’ll resolve whatever it is they’re dealing with

and it’s mostly just background noise for the kiddos??  like they barely notice it bc their moms dont rlly act any different when they’re in the middle of a fight, like yeah maybe they’re not as gross as usually, maybe the kiddos dont walk in on their moms making out in the kitchen, but thats like??  it??

one of maia’s friend’s parents fight a lot, like loud screaming matches, and one time maia’s staying over when they get into it and she’s so shocked?? ?  like holy shit why are they yelling at each other

uh they’re fighting??  you said your moms fight sometimes

um yeah sort of

she goes home the next day and just hugs her moms like holy shit she never realized how good she and finn and stella have it, like she can’t imagine living with screaming matches every other day

catch the rest of this under the cut bc i just realized its super long, sorry @ mobile users

NOW WHEN THE KIDDOS FIGHT WITH THEIR MOMS??  strap in friend

so each kid has their own style of arguing with their moms??  and it varies between kara and lena too like maia fights with kara one way but lena another ANYWAY

so finn isnt v loud when he’s upset??  he rlly isnt and he shies away from the term fighting even, prefers disagreement instead, so like when (on v v few occasions) he gets into an argument with his moms, its always p quiet??  and usually resolved by the end of the day tbh like he’s one of those ppl that Cannot go to bed with shit left unresolved, he has a thing abt starting every day with a clean slate (this occasionally means some long nights)

like the biggest things he ever argues with kara abt are like his willingness to cover up whatever maia’s gotten up to and the fact that he is complicit in a lot of kind of shady stuff his sisters get up to when they kind of become vigilantes and he’s had a total of maybe two arguments with lena and both of them were during and about his one rebellious phase where he broke curfew a few times and gave his moms some scares by letting his phone die bc he was feeling ~reckless~

his arguments with kara tend to last p long??  like days/weeks sometimes bc they are rlly a lot alike but in different ways??  like finn has a slightly narrowed moral compass i guess, where he can excuse what his sisters do bc theyre his sisters and they’re doing whatever it is for good reason but kara’s like??  no it’s still dangerous and not well planned and also illegal but neither of them ever yell (quite honestly kara and lena have like never yelled at their kiddos except when they’re in imminent danger??) but they dont rlly raise their voices so there’s just a lot of stony silence until someone (usually stella) sort of shoves finn’s shoulder and says you dont have to defend us, what we did was fucked up or approaches kara and is like hey, dont be angry with him

and then when he goes to apologize or she comes to him they both end up crying.  listen, they’re a soft ass family ok tears happen A Lot

the two times finn has argued with lena were both v short, happened v late at night bc she stayed up until he came home and both included the phrase (from finn) i get to be a kid too, you know and both times that final phrase made lena stop dead and just.  give up??  like god, he’s right, he’s taken on a lot of responsibility in their family, so lena just sort of gathers him up and hugs him rlly tight and is like we’ll talk about extending your curfew but please don’t ever scare your mother and i like that ever again and finn is like ???  ok???  

for sure figured he was getting grounded for weeks but instead he ended up with an extended curfew and like........one weekend of being grounded 

MAIA OH MY GOD maia fights with kara a lot when she’s older, bc she has like??  a v different moral code i guess like do no harm but take no shit kind of goes out the window, like maia’s taken this stance that the second u threaten her ppl, she’s well within her rights to beat your ass and she with lena she argues a lot during this one earlier period in her life where she gets into some bad situations and lena’s like ???  sweetheart what are you doing and maia’s sort of like GOD I CAN MAKE MY OWN CHOICES IM MATURE and lena’s trying v hard not to let it turn into a fight but, well, maia is trying v hard to turn it into a fight

so like her arguing with kara tends to happen more as maia’s an adult tbh and it sometimes escalates to full yelling bc at a certain point she becomes kara’s colleague at the deo and when she does stupid shit, she’s endangering a lot of ppl, including her siblings and her moms and herself 

meanwhile she fights with lena a lot as a teenager over stupid shit rlly like it’s not always abt deep shit but when it is it gets rlly uncomfortable bc lena hates arguing with her kids, she does, and maia’s not like finn, won’t ever get to the heart of why she’s angry at lena so it’s just??  it’s messy and bad and lena makes sure that maia’s left the house before she starts crying and maia makes sure she’s well out of the city before she starts crying and finn and stella and kara usually run damage control for them bc otherwise they’d be in this holding pattern of just sort of being like we’re okay.......for NOW and then having more and more arguments bc they never get to the heart of the matter and yeah, maia feels rlly guilty when she’s older abt how she treated lena as a teenager

and there have been times where she fights with both her moms at the same time, like there’s this period in her life (like around her sophomore/junior year of high school??) where she gets into a p bad situation that she refuses to let her moms know abt so they only see her cutting class and her grades falling and her like yelling at her siblings so they sit her down abt it and it results in several Big Arguments that end p badly and damage everyone’s trust for a little while bc now kara and lena are like??  holy shit what is she into???  and maia feels like her moms dont ~understand~ even though they legitimately would if she would just tell them whats going on and she feels like she can’t tell them so it’s a Mess for a while

stella refuses to argue with her moms.  she just Wont do it.  she rlly kind of refuses to fight with anyone she cares abt bc she can feel what they feel and that fucks with how she feels and idk it’s weird, sometimes other ppls emotions influence her or sometimes her emotions influence others.  bc of that, she tries to avoid it if she can but obviously it happens sometimes

this is her MO; she never lets it turn into a real argument, she’ll just like.....walk into room with whichever mom she’s irritated with or both if that’s the situation and just be v blunt like im angry that you wouldnt let me go out with ari last night and then she retreats before they can say anything else.  then, probably a couple hours later, she comes back and says another thing like it wasn’t fair because you let finn do the same thing and i feel like you treat me differently than him or maia and then retreats.  and then FINALLY  she’s kind of gotten a hold on her own emotions and feels like she’ll actually be able to speak with her moms without losing control and then its not even an argument so much as a debate rlly

like the weird stop start pattern is how she has to go about it so she knows that no one’s emotions are influencing anyone else’s???  like that way she knows she’s not making kara or lena angrier and she knows that they’re not making her any angrier, that whatever they bring to the table is their own

her moms thinks its rlly cute and also theyre rlly sad that she has to like.....live like this??  like she’s so terrified of ever taking away someone’s free will that she’ll just drag out a highly uncomfortable experience (stella Hates confrontation and, if given the opportunity, would probably just get it all done and over with in one go but sadly that is not an option for her) just to make sure she’s not doing anything wrong irt other ppl

she tends to argue with kara more??  bc thats who, in general, does actually treat her a bit differently bc she’s the one that’s like painfully aware that stella’s not kryptonian.  like and that’s not a problem obviously!!  kara loves her just the same as she loves finn and maia but it’s just scary for kara bc there’s a certain level of comfort in knowing finn and maia are stronger and faster and virtually invulnerable, and it’s terrifying that her youngest, tiniest child isnt.  like even just physically??  stella is so much smaller than her siblings and that’s just like a visual representation of their differences and its scares kara so so much every time stella walks out the door.  so she’s the one that generally is like hey maybe wear flats, you dont want to break your ankle or you cant go out in this weather, you’ll catch your death and stella’s like ???  you dont treat maia and finn like theyre babies and she gets rlly angry abt stuff like that bc she knows she’s different??  but she doesnt like getting reminded 

her arguments with lena arent even arguments like they rlly are essentially debates over rlly small insignificant stuff, like it rarely gets heated, feelings are never hurt.  that said, she’s had like one Major argument with lena and thats like when stella starts doing her own vigilante shit, like learns jiu jitsu and krav maga and gets maia’s best friend beth (a tech genius interning at l-corp) to help her with the gadgetry and lena’s the first to find out and she’s like No, no you’re not doing this, this isn’t safe and stella’s like technically i am an adult so yeah i am doing this and its more a battle of wills??  like there’s no out and out confrontation but it’s a weird few months until there is

NOW WHEN THE KIDDOS FIGHT

they rlly dont fight that much but usually its between finn and maia, with stella and their moms playing peace maker/referee.  like.....thats their dynamic, their built in system.  finn and maia’s inherent morality go against each other like at nearly every turn bc finn is such a pacifist and maia rlly rlly isnt, like even from when they were little that was like the main source of conflict for them

like finn always feels like he needs to go along with whatever maia’s up to just to minimize damage??  keep collateral damage low, u know??  and maia’s fine with that, likes having her brother with her as back up, likes not feeling so alone in her rage, but he’s kind of useless help, always standing behind her and telling her to leave it, walk away, it’s not worth it but like it fucking is??  to her???  

they do get into screaming matches sometimes.  like......they’ll fly up out of sight of the city and just rip into each other and whenever they come back home, they just will not look at each other for a while.  and stella’s left adrift bc they’re some of her favorite ppl and holy shit, what if this is the fight that rlly breaks them all apart??  so she runs between them, trying for damage control, but she’s not v good at it bc she’s way too invested, soaks up all their emotions like a sponge and comes away from it worse for wear

and like kara and lena are always on top of the situation, u know??  like they may not always know what their kiddos are fighting abt bc their arguments tend to wander to different things so what they may hear abt may not be what started it, but they always know when they’re fighting and usually they’ll each take on one of them to talk to, exchange notes, make a plan, help them figure out a compromise

and best yet, they know when sometimes they just need to step back and let them work it out for themselves???  like they know when to back away and when to pull stella away bc, bless her, she’s still desperately trying to fix everything bc its wildly uncomfortable for her whenever there’s tension in the house, so sometimes the best thing is just to distract her with other stuff and let finn and maia work whatever it is out between themselves (and they always do like, at the end of the day, they love each other a lot and rlly arent ever abt to let anything come between them)

on the occasions that stella’s ever fighting with someone, it’s usually maia and its usually that theyre both kind of jealous of the other??  like maia is everything stella wishes she was, all tall and gorgeous and smart and kryptonian but stella isnt angry all the time, doesnt have this rage eating away at her, can live her life without wanting to put holes in walls every day and so they get jealous of the other and the get irritated and they get fucking angry and maia’s so angry, stella can’t help but absorb some of that, even if she’s being careful

they mostly fight during high school??  like thats when its just the two of them in the house, after finn’s off at college, that’s when there’s no buffer between them and that’s when stella so desperately wants to be like her big sister, that’s when maia doesnt want to have to take over for finn as stella’s protector, wants to live her own life for once goddammit

and like???  it’s kind of out of nowhere.  like kara and lena dont see it coming but one day kara hears maia screaming and is like fuck and flies home and is like ????  when its just her and stella, red faced and breathing hard and stella looks like she’s on the verge of tears and maia looks as if she wants nothing more than to just leave and she tries to play peace maker but it only seems to make it worse bc both girls feel like she’s taking the other’s side and they both storm off and kara’s still just sort of ??????  what the actual fuck ???

they dont fight often, but they do actually play dirty bc they both know where to poke and prod and press to hurt the most and they rlly dont ever Truly work through it until they’re like full grown adults, like stella’s in college and maia’s grown and living in opal city and stella calls her when she’s like real fucking wasted and is like hoooooly shit we’re fucked up maia, we’re real shitty to each other??  but we shouldnt be because i love you, i love you so much and i miss you and did you know jungle juice is really strong???  its so strong maia.  maia did i tell you i love you because i do a lot

maia’s sort of freaked out by the confession/apology and she’s freaked out by the way stella’s slurring her words and she almost just calls kara to go get her but this is her baby sister and she called her??  she called maia, not finn, not kara, not lena, she called maia, so maia grabs a comfy sweater and hauls ass to stella’s university and just bundles her baby sister up and gives her a lot of water to drink and stays with her that night and helps her with her hangover the next day and stella’s sort of shocked she came (stella also doesnt rlly remember her phone call but u know, semantics) but then maia hangs around until stella’s like a little less hungover and she makes them dinner and is like so, we should talk and then they do !!  and they actually finally are truthful with one another, finally say what they mean and its rlly good and stella’s so so happy bc she has her big sister back and maia’s over the fucking moon like she missed stella so much, remembers when they were little and she would braid stella’s hair and show her how to balance on a skateboard 

#supercorp #supergirl #lena luthor #kara danvers #superbabies #do u know how hard it is for me to write healthy arguments + resolution?? #my family got me fucked up #tinytoffeebean #human interaction

[celestialallstars]

Episode 11: “The odds are against me but I’m gonna make it....” - Loris

FUCK YOU MATT. FUCK YOU JACK. FUCK YOU STEPHEN. FUCK THIS CAST. YALL LYING ASS HOES SUCK MY FUCKING NIPPLES

Right now, I've got a mixture of feelings. On one end, I guess the tribal showed were some people's loyalties lie, but on the other I couldn't help but feel like it was a bit much. Like everybody in this game has literally lied and like I don't know, I understood Jack and Matt's frustration but it was a big yikes to see it get so tense and everyone get worked up. Like had my laptop not shut off, I would have likely snapped tonight and I think I'm seeing the good and the bad of things right now and it's just...a mess. Not to mention the 8 man alliance couldn't get it together until the 11th hour.

Fuck. Fucking fuck. Matt is finally gone, and this time we pulled it all off to keep him until Jared fucking pulled out an idol. How did he even know it was gonna be Chloe anyways? Man. I can't help but wonder if he wouldn't have played it had Matt and I shut our mouths but I think he would've anyways. I couldn't help myself, I couldn't let him lie again in public about that I had to expose him. Now he's got no idol, he's got few allies (I think), he's totally vulnerable and I pray to god we get him in the next 2 rounds.

It just occurred to me that I had a part in the chaos tonight. Stephen was already worried about the vote, but if I don't talk to Jack/Mitch then none of the last minute plan to vote Chloe happens I feel or gains as much momentum, then half the craziness that happened tonight at tribal does not happen at all....I saved Steph but at the cost of seemingly having Jared cost his game.

________________________________________________________________

I'm really drained at the moment between the school stuff and this game and now Jared claims my name was around for this round, or at least it was Bryce's plan. It did not phase me because I already wanted to go against Bryce/Zach but now it at least gives me another reason. AS of all of the craziness, my gut told me to try and stick it out with Michael/Chloe. I believe that between Rhys/Bryce/Zach's sketchiness, Jack just being himself, and Loris, I'd rather just try things out with the others. At this point, I'm kind of over a lot of the BS that people keep trying to sell. Having that said, I firmly believe that things need to get outted tomorrow unless we attempt a full on blindside.

I keep checking my messages as though someone wants to talk to me. Spoiler alert: they don’t.

Sooooo YESTERDAY WAS A DAY!

It started off so simple, Matt seemed to be the target for the majority alliance and Michael/Chloe didn't seem very interested in keeping him around. So I came up with a scheme that I think may have tied into someone else's scheme. But I didn't know it at the time. ANYWAYYYYY...

Matt's going home, but I don't want to vote him. Why? Because I wanna strengthen my relationship with Jack, so I approach both of them to talk about things and figure out who they're voting for. Matt was very antagonistic and I figured out this is because he heard I was saying his name, which was true! I get them to say a name they'd rather have taken out, and it's Chloe. Sure. Me and Chloe barely talk tbh. So I essentially go around getting pissy about wanting to vote Chloe instead of Matt to my alliance because I need to sell it anddddddd........

They... Want to vote her out? SKDJSKDKSKSKSKSKAKSK

Ummmm this wasn't the plan! Everyone except Loris and Jared want to do it. Okay. Whatever. I'm too deep in now to flip back, sorry Chloe!

THEN JARED PLAYS THE IDOL SKSKDKDMSKSKSKSKSSM

Ok but why didn't you use that idol to save Mitch hm?

Sketchy bitch.

Soooo I hear afterwards that Zach and Bryce had a chat with Jack and Matt and apparently they might have wanted to vote Chloe anyway????? But then why let the vote be Matt for the entire day? When we all would've voted Chloe if they just said her name originally? And now Jared also has a chat with Chloe and Michael? Worst allies ever.

Idk Zach and Bryce are sketchy and I've known that since the Mitch vote. Maybe they should watch their backs in the near future ......

First off I was SO happy for Loris! It would have been nice to immunity, but I know with all of the distracting things I had for the day that I did good with the few hours I had. This makes me wonder if it will continue a trend I see in a lot of orgs where I begin to place in the top 4 a lot in the late game. Only time shall tell. Going into this tribal, I for once feel great. Making a new alliance with Loris/Michael/Chloe/Jared all the while keeping Stephen in the loop. I'll still smile and wave in the 13th, three kings, literally any other chat but as far as I'm concerned, I'm ridding my hands of that. Hope its not too early to feel good (it is)

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So I did some thinking and for a bit I had a feeling me or Bryce would get 10th. This was just because Karth came in 20th and Kori in 15th, which had to mean one of us would come in 10th and the other in 5th. Time to see how accurate this prophecy is

Day 25......... gross. So disregarding the challenge because yikes the whole game seems to be flipped on and the best part is that I don’t put myself forward as a target and Jared and Chloe are seen as this tight duo so I expect them to be targeted over myself. However chris and loris both expressed disappointment in how the game has been progressing and Bryce and zach both came to me to strategise so hopefully I’m in some sort of power position in the game however chris has pulled this before where he’s so sad he didn’t get his way and so disappointed and nothing has changed so right now my focus is on how to get myself forward in the game with hopefully more to come and Bryce will hopefully be eliminated this round.

Soooooo I had to abstain from the challenge for work but that's okay. I don't think I'm the target anyway.

The biggest news is that Jared has added onto his old group of Chloe and Michael to create a new majority. One that is planning to overthrow the old one in the near future. Based on what Chris has told me, the additions are himself and Loris.

The issue is, based on what Jared has told me, that Loris wants to wait one more round before locking things down. I see why he'd want to do this. Jack could easily slip through the cracks of the impending majority vs. majority war and that puts him within reach of an easy win at FTC in my opinion.

Jack might actually go home unanimously if things keep up like this. It'd be sad, because I just really started putting work into my relationship with him recently, but it really doesn't seem worth it when, even if I save him, I'll likely be targeting him within 2 or 3 rounds anyway. Cyrena? More like, sayonara.

Of course, if last vote is any indication, this can all change in a couple of minutes! So who the fuck knows. There's still 3 hours until tribal and if I can convince the 5 in power to pull their move now I wouldn't mind it at all.

hi!! ok so like... I won immunity??? and it was a creative challenge???? I’m so shocked and proud of myself I rlly tried to snap and things went wrong but I still SNAPPED!!! and now I made single digits oh my god!!! like... 9th or above I’m so happy with but of course I’m gonna win anyways. so. I suggested an alliance with me chloe Chris michael Jared to Chris and Jared and now it’s a real thing and like.. we just need to get people to vote jack for themselves and then we can run the game perry add. That could be a serve. I genuinely feel like I’m in a rather good spot this game I don’t think anyone should want to vote me out except stephen  maybe??  jack is hard to read because I’m not sure he talks To that many people ... idk... also oh my god so I just need to survive 3 more tribals and then I can play my legacy.... and like I’ll be so proud of myself if I get to do that. both seasons I find the legacy in round one(?) and I manage to hold onto it until the final six both times ?? like.. the odds are against me but Im gonna make it....

girl idk. i feel in danger because of lack of talk. everyone wants jack out. id prefer chloe. the only votes we can get are bryce, rhys, jack and myself. loris is dumb. HE WONT idk. jareds legit playin super well and good for him but ppl needa wake up and start knockin off his +1’s so hes easier to take out in the future. but who cares. these people are gonna end up lettin like jared or chris win .. and good. i suppose they deserve it.

im just super tired. partly due to this game but partly because of irl factors... so i just cant go chaotic. its so fun but soooo draining, and its hard when everyone leaks things and jared wants to be dumb and idol. it wasnt dumb. im petty. its real dumb.

im just trying to get ppl on my side but it seems so hard NNNN so . we’ll see

My names going round again 🤠

Ever since I played the idol on Chloe (which was indeed an in the moment decision), I feel a lot better about my spot in the game.

I revealed basically everything to Chris. There was very little that I left out. I told him about the F2 with Bryce, and my motivations behind every decision so far.

Sometimes overbearing trust comes out of overbearing promises. I still need someone to have my back no matter what, so being open with Chris was necessary. I still will try my best to keep Bryce in the game. I need them to war with each other because it will be a long term buffer for me. In terms of F3 plans, I'm not sure. I have options between Chris, Rhys, Chloe, Michael, Stephen, and Loris. I wouldn't mind staying true and taking Bryce as far as I can, but eventually his number will be up and I think that will be better for my chances to win anyways.

Today I finally pulled the trigger and Chris and I put together this 5some of him, Chloe, Michael, Loris, and myself called "starpower."

I will have to be cheeky with Chris to stay in a better spot than him, because he doesn't have strict promises with Bryce as far as I know.

Tonight Jack will go home which was Loris' call. I think it's fine because either way next round Stephen will want a big target out and he needs me to make it happen. I want that target to be on Zach, because I think Zach is the current frontrunner to win, and I think voting him will suit Stephen.

With that being said, it will take a smooth game from hear on out to not be a total goat. I'll try my best.

Feeling very strange about this vote. It's another sort of last minute vote, we've all kind of agreed to do a hard reset and vote Chloe again, but now that I've seen one idol play I can't help but feel like there's another coming, and this time it'd directed towards me potentially. I think I'm gonna propose possibly splitting votes just to cover our bases, because I do feel like Jared and Chloe are now gonna want to target me for no reason other than it's convenient.

If someone idols Jack tonight I’m gonna scream 🤡

So, I wanted Chloe gone this round, because I'm scared she will just float through this game and take a spot at the end. Which is exactly what is happening this vote. People want Jack instead so here we go. Haven't been too active so couldn't have gotten the numbers. Sad times.

Hi so the vote seems to be on  jack which is a little bit anti climatic because everyone was like let’s make a move and then boom jack goes like I thot we were going after bryce zach or rhys but I guess not? Anyway I hope im not being played by bitches right now and people stick to their words. Or at least vote jared/Chloe out

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The thing that makes me most nervous going into tribal is that it makes strategic sense for Stephen not to vote with us and instead vote out Jared who’s a far bigger threat than Jack but hopefully the fear of a tie will mean that he makes it 6 and I hope he realises that I’m ok with going against Jared sksksksksk.

THIS game is so sad liek nothing i want happens ppl are just not wanting to do what i want and thats so unlike my first season KJFHDASKJ i just want total control and someone to run the game with but jared is so annoying and is trying to work with the ppl who will vote him out bc hes such a big threat like girl pls just let me have my way and i wont cut u at 4th! im still fuming over the idol play like who does he think he is playing it without letting me know thats all i ask i literally feel pathetic trying to work with him when he clearly has chris/loris/chloe interests ahead of me

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Jack is voted out 8-1-1. He becomes the third member of our jury.

Watch Jack’s exit interview take place below:

#shinebright #episode