#its only been one treatment

[cowdragons]

aaa i got my facial hair lazer'd today and it was also the first time in a long time that i've smiled at myself in a mirror

#i also cried like. constantly throughout the entire procedure because my pain tolerance is so incredibly low but it was also way better than #i thought it was going to be!! genuinely!! #i'm. kinda elated over it #been touching my smoothness and reveling in not feeling stubble when i look down or tuck under covers #and literally everyone at the clinic was SUPER super nice like literally the least biggoted public space ive ever been in in wisconsin lol #aaa #! #:] #moo.txt #obviously i'm not completely smooth yet #its only been one treatment #but i could cry again from how nice it feels

[thequibblingking13]

Fearne Calloway, the woman that you are

(Zoom for better quality bc this file is big as fuck)

#critical role #critical role spoilers #cr #cr spoilers #cr3 #cr3 spoilers #bell's hells #fearne calloway #fearne cr #critical role art #cr art #bee draws #this piece was really just one big art experiment for me which is why it's as wild as it is #also ignore that she's missing 95% of her core outfit. i was just having fun #ANYWAYS. Fearne getting the hellboy treatment was literally incredible and her new look sounds so so cool. so u know i had to draw something #this has been my only art of the campaign and its bc it brought on SUCH a strong image #obligatory tags for if aabria iyengar ever sees this art: thanks for willing burn-fearne into existence and letting me draw hot women 👍✨

[aroacettorney]

tbh i wish aup had more reps for characters who achieve greatness purely through hard work and effort. the emphasis on genius/being special is mayhaps way too much to the point that it feels kinda damn depressing for those who aint born as one.

#rant #why is everyone in aup a genius #the four musketeers have the potential for this but its unfortunate that we dont get to see it fleshed out #even aiden ended up relying on his antimagic talents in the long run #ngl owens would have been more impressive to me if they r hardworkers instead of born special #it would have made the fact that ludger took them in more interesting #and mayhaps even highlighted his qualifications as a teacher #(lowkey im still salty that we dont get the full arc of ludger teaching magic to arpa lmfao) #(owens growth feels much less impactful to me bc they are already so special that them becoming that OP is nothing surprising) #plus i thought fighting against the unfairness of the world was a theme for owens #even if one managed to close the gap between the wealthy and the poor or noble and non-noble #the division between a genius and a non-genius itself would only create another kind of classism #how r they gonna challenge it as the members of the one and only special talent club? #violetta is the closest to be the hardworking one but even then her achievement still has a hand of a devil in it #also while surna had to learn everything from scratch he had been around for hundreds if not thousands of years #not to diminish his achievements but that hardly counts cuz it still puts him next to the special treatment category #not to mention being able to learn something simply by observing it is also a kind of cheat code itself...

[ink-asunder]

Having demand avoidance in a medical setting is literally hell. Like, patient autonomy is already absolute ass. It's only made worse when doctors CONSISTENTLY tell you what to do and act like you HAVE to do it instead of consulting with you first like normal fucking people.

#also “”“”medical necessity“”“” is NOT an excuse here. #ive been to plenty of doctors that thoroughly discuss a range/timeline of treatment and explain it IN DETAIL before saying “thats what i- #-recommend“ instead of just going ”okay were gonna do this. im gonna explain the prep to you a mile a minute and if you have any follow up- #-questions im just gonna repeat part of my spiel with no clarification. and if i cant answer your questions too bad :)“ #not to mention how many doctors just force you to do things that WILL NEVER WORK #like one therapist tried forcing me to do emdr when i was only IN HER TOWN for the summer and i had no internet access when i was at college #im pretty sure emdr takes several weeks to work and i did not have that kind of time available to me. i couldnt just drop out bc of ptsd. #also the number of times ive had to decline an ESI is stupid. I've already had 2! they didn't work! i had a bad reaction to the meds! #why am i being forced to do it again? #also back surgery. i cant do that because i am a white trash rural kid and our home (which we built ourselves) CANNOT be accessible enough #for spinal surgery recovery. but i went to the surgeon and he was like “thats valid! and also surgery literally wouldnt help you so idk why- #-they sent you here.“ : l It's cool to be right all the time lol #its like. no wonder i developed medical demand avoidance after so much traumatizing and malpracticy bullshit in my life #demand avoidance #medical demand avoidance #chronic illness burnout #chronic illness #chronic pain #medical tw #ptsd #disability #medical neglect #medical trauma #vent #this might be too personal. if i do delete it ill have it rb'd on my boar-deer-whitetrashbutterfly blog first #idk i just havent really been able to find anyone else talking about this specific effect of being chronically ill/disabled.

[themanwhowouldbefruit]

my doctor was sooooo fucking worthless and unhelpful im going to masturbate and i hope it fucking kills me

#“no need for follow up” #“yeah you did have several cysts we scrapped off your remaining ovary but. dw about it. idk why they were there. dw about it. oh also your #ovary on that side was freakishly huge but. dw about it. it might go away. dw about it #*doctor shrug emoji* “ #“go see a gyno next year maybe. but not me im too important for that. go find and onboard a gyno to your situation. next year maybe idk lol” #he barely even looked at my incision like #this fucking appointment could have been an email. or a phone call. or they just could have let me start driving again. also i forgot to ask #if i can stop drinking ensure now or after the 6 weeks? cause that shit cost $$$$. but he probably would have been super unhelpful if i had #fr fr this guy only wanted to give me the time of day when he thought i might have fun cancer inside and now he's like gtfo!!!! get your #fugly cancerless ass out of here!!!! recover from a major surgery on your own you swagless cancerless loser 🤣 we arent helping your #swagless ass!!! #anyway it seems weird and fucked up that im was never offered to see a physical therapist and i guess am going to have to blindly trust my #abs they sliced thru are healing or whatever and to rawdog my own physical recovery of my muscles? even just dumb shit like. my center of #gravity has drastically changed since the mass removal and my back hurts like shit all the time because all my posture muscles were built up #for when i had an extra 30 pounds of cyst hanging in the front and my posture and walking reflected that. and i lowkey don't know how #hard i am able to be with my healing incision because its really tight and makes me hunch forwards still. like i would really like to know #how much i can safely or maybe should be forcing my skin and incision to stretch. without damage? is that crazy #am i crazy??? #this shit is why i didnt see a doctor for 2 years until my problems had snowballed into a 30 pounds ovarian cyst that was crushing my other #organs and had one of my kidneys all backed up with piss. and even getting emergency treatment for it everyone was like. how did you like it #get this bad?? how could you not know you needed to seek medical treatment???? like. bro. seeking medical treatment isnt even a guarantee to #get medical treatment. #anyway he said my “remaining ovary seemed low key polycystic but dw about it. don't quote me on that im not dealing with it.” #bro i dont want to doctor google it i wanted an actual doctor to deal with it. fuck you. #like. maybe even a doctor who knows my situation so i dont have to struggle with getting someone to believe me and take me seriously. #but whatever. back to trying to figure out the daily protein and extra calories my body needs for recovery via doctor google i guess. #its fine 🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬

[silenthillbunni]

📓🕯️🐇🖤

#just a little diary dump: #i've contacted my school therapist again. asked for help regarding anxiety abt schoolwork since i dont get any other treatment #she said she can help me go thru if there are other options since neither psychiatric nor healthcare center will help me #+ she said that she and i can talk abt my anxiety regarding school etc. so in two weeks i'll see her #school starts next week. 4days a week rip... lol thats much for me. a bum. a cellar dweller. i've decided that im gnna go to all my classes #and always work while im there since its harder for me to do it at home. and i will also talk more w my teacher nd ask them for help #then im looking into an online therapy service. it miiight be possible for me to do that. but then i have to contact them and focus on only #1 or 2 issues. in my experience it just doesnt work to go to them and be like everythings bad :(( they wont help u then. i have to narrow it #down for them. nd i'll think i will talk 2 them abt my extreme feelings of loneliness and also my procrastination behavior #but yeah i have no idea if it's possibly bc idk if i can get financial aid for that service. im still in contact w the healthcare center so #i hope she will come to some sort of conclusion nd not just leave my high nd dry (she sent another referral to the persobality disorder - #clinic. even if they rejected the first one. so i'll see) #hmmm yeah. the situation w my sisters is sooooo rough. i hate it. they make me feel so so bad #and the housing situation is roughhhh. it's impossible to get an apartment lol. #so i need to find a way to shut it off and try to not let it bother me #just focus on finishing upper secondary school. nd i've been thinking abt taking out a loan for it and take german/french/spanish classes #instead of doing what im doing now when im actually poor and stressed bc they can choose to cut me off anytime #im meeting my highschool friend on tuesday. she asked if i wanted to hang out for a bit c: #im a bit anxious but like yeah.. it's nice to get out and talk to someone besides my family. which is just my mom lol #i messaged my other old highschool classmate on insta and said i saw her in my neighborhood #she replied but i had lowkeyyy hoped for more... like maybe being able to befriend her T-T but she didnt seem so interested in talking to me #which is ok ofc. it just made me a bit sad bc idk how to make friends and i thought she was rlly nice. but oh well #im rlly sad atm. maybe heartbreak prob. even more sad bc it was my stupid fault but yeah #im still grateful for all that it gave me. nd how i got to experience feelings of warmth nd love nd appreciation i didnt know i could feel #so even if im just contantly heavily sad bc i keep being like oh. i wanna ask this. say that. wonder what theyre up to. etc etc. i just have #to... be sad and just keep going forward #hope and try to not fuck everything else up. even if it feels like... what do all the other things matter when what i rlly rlly wanted got #ruined..... thats life tho. i know. im just so bad at handling life :(( #i feel so broken and confused and i hate that i didnt get to be normal and healthy #im so illequipped at dealing w myself nd my emotions nd there seems to be no professional help for me

[blueaiyuice]

jihoo has stolen my heart (platonically)

jihoo pisses me off because he's so naturally pretty and cute at the same time i am going to steal his skin (affectionately). he was already so eye-catching in boys planet and even more in evnne

it is criminally unfair how cute and pretty he is. give me your genes now mr tiny rapper (i don’t care that he's like 5'9)

also yes snuck some junghyun pics in there too bc the maknaez of evnne are so cute

#evnne #boys planet #park jihoo #evnne jihoo #ngl he's been getting the good side of the treatment in my fanfics too #well #in all of them except for gsm #we don't talk about what happened to him in gsm #anyways its so hard to pick a bias in evnne #i thought itd be jeonghyeon #but hes on junghyuns level #and junghyuns like my best friend #but yunseos voice and visual is so underrated #but seungeon's voice and personality #and jihoo being cutieeee #and park hanbin being well #only one i can say is not my bias fs is keita

[jgrills]

.

#look like I've been getting bored w/ the unfair tumblr treatment #oh well. #I'll probably just stick to making headcanons #since tumblr is unfair #I know ppl probably saw my laziness on the one I did days ago #sigh #Yeah #I give up #After this headcanon of hobie w reader #I'm afraid to say #but I'm either not gonna write anymore #or just take headcanons ONLY #hate it had to come to this yk #I've just been getting way too caught up in stuff #like real stuff be messing me up sometimes #Not saying I'll not write #but its a possibility #I'll just be another decoration on tumblr's belt until I pick up the tablet and force myself to draw #Still be here #but not here #Fics are making me exhausted and overwhelmed (kind of) #<- what i was afraid of from the start #well #past me #it happened #These thoughts could pass #As I am only up at 11 staring at a bright Christmas tree #my eyes burn #delete this later

[bbyboybucket]

Well, I hope the pro-lifers and the U.S. gov is happy. Cause now pregnant women (who decided to keep their child) and are having pregnancy emergencies, like ectopic pregnancies, blood clots and preeclampsia, placenta complications and decay, birth/labor complications, etc. are being refused treatment to help them survive. Literally even women who are in ORGAN FAILURE are being turned away by hospitals and doctors and are being refused treatment due to abortion laws, or if not outright refused, they’re being put at the bottom of triage. These women who are dying or at risk of dying, are being denied survival for themselves and even possibly their child, because if a mother dies, it’s likely the fetus isn’t gonna have an easy time either. That’s super “pro-life” of these people. So “pro-life” that they’re okay with a woman dying because she tried to have a child and her body couldn’t keep up with the physical demands. When will these dumb fucks realize that it was never and will never just be about the “morals” of birth control. It doesn’t just involve a woman may wanna terminate an unplanned pregnancy, it’s hurting the women who do want to have children too. And if someone can’t bring themselves to agree with pregnancy termination, the least they can do is wake up and realize this is bigger than birth control. It’s literally life or death of full grown women. It’s life or death for your sisters, your mothers, your wives, or even yourself if you’re a woman who’s a pro-life. And these people are dying, literally dying. All because idiots would rather have both mother and child die, than just save the woman who has an actual life.

#omfg this makes me so angry #bc I already knew women were being denied treatment for ectopic pregnancies or were being treated but have been legally punished afterwards #which is enraging enough on its own #but now it’s extending even further into every area of pregnancy care #and not only that but bc they’ve done away with abortion #certain states are trying to get rid of other health care laws #specifically one where if the law is over turned #hospitals/doctors can deny a patient due to finances no matter how severe their condition #like emergency rooms can choose to not treat someone if they think they’re too poor to pay afterwards #like imagine someone getting in a car accident or having a heart attack and the ER won’t treat them bc they have a low SES #that’s what the abortion ban has opened the door too #this is fucking crazy #I hate this country so much #it’s so fucking corrupted #abortion

[astrogenica]

people claim to understand that progress isn't linear and recovery can take a long time until it becomes personally inconvenient to them and then you're just a stupid lazy bastard to them no matter how you behaved before you became outwardly sick or how hard you've been trying to get better. and i will be mad about that forever

#text post #vent #venting #vent post #chronic illness #mental illness #progress is not linear #recovery takes time #ive only been diagnosed and trying treatments for my autoimmune disease for 1yr #ive been sick for closer to 5 #i just got covid for the second time in january and its fucked up all the progress #that i was making #and now rather than try to support me through a major setback #everyone is acting like i just dont have my shut together and im not trying #meanwhile i am doing my best to keep up when walking a single flight of stairs is still hard for me #and there are very few people who meaningfully recognize how hard this is for me #i used to work three jobs while going to school full time seeing my family frequently #AND having a social life and maintaining my ltr #now im married yeah but i only do one wfm full time job barely engage with my hobbies #see my family and friends infrequently and tbh barely leave my house #and its not for any lack of wanting to #its because i CANT #and even fewer people are making am efforts to accommodate me #so i force myself to occasionally go out and see people #and then need to recover for two weeks #and they dont even appreciate how HARD it is #so much of the effort disabled put into their interactions with abled or just differently #disabled loved ones goes completely unnoticed because its expected as the bare minimum another can do #but rhe bare minimum to them is the absolute best you yourself can give #and nobody cares

[fizzingwizard]

"My brother had no regard for her; his pleasures were not what they ought to have been, and from the first he treated her unkindly. The consequence of this, upon a mind so young, so lively, so inexperienced as Mrs. Brandon’s, was but too natural. She resigned herself at first to all the misery of her situation; and happy had it been if she had not lived to overcome those regrets which the remembrance of me occasioned. But can we wonder that, with such a husband to provoke inconstancy, and without a friend to advise or restrain her[...] she should fall?" - Jane Austen, Sense and Sensibility

#jane austen #sense and sensibility #literature #the level of sympathy and compassion and understanding of the human heart #we think of historical eras as either moral and right or depraved always one or the other #and that the morality of the first was upheld by the stern treatment of anyone who acted out #and by extension that depravity is brought on by a lack of rigidity #but the struggles and paradoxes that are part of being human were just as real and just as common and people DID understand them #its only the base and unimaginative who think everyone can be fit into one righteous box if they just try hard enough #never acknowledging times they failed their own standards or maybe without ever having been tested at all #its easy for someone who is happy to judge someone who is unhappy #and we have always known this and it's always been true but we're still dealing with the same unbending personalities who are so loud #just the other day i was in an internet fight where multiple people were claiming that if someone says no to regular sex they are cheating #the possibility that they just have a low sex drive or are going through something was called an exception too rare to matter #the possibility that people are different and not everyone wants the same amount of sex and sex is really very awful when you dont want it #was laughed and sneered at. whats more a partner who accepts their partners sex drive for what it is was called a beta lol #being compassionate and understanding of people you love = beta behavior LOL LOL #this is why we cant have nice things. relationships should be based on support and communication and openness #to the reality that people change sometimes in ways we like and sometimes in ways we dont. nothing is forever. #my two thoughts that entire thread: i hope the men who read this arent intimidated out of standing up for their female partners. and #i hope the women reading this understand you have to believe in yourself despite all of it. despite everything the world throws at you. #of course women can be mean and selfish just as much as men and of course mens needs and feelings matter and so does keeping commitments #but no one has a crystal ball and if you enter a relationship expecting things will always be A Certain Way you're in for a rude awakening #especially if all you do to promote what you want is to badger and pressure and shame your partner for being an imperfect human #tangent but its just these things are so timeless. we should know better now. there's got to be something wrong with us that we don't

[stardustcrusader]

at the ripe age of 26 i have realized that my anxiety disorder is actually ocd

#it explains... a lot #personal #text post #ive been diagnosed w gad for 10 years #but only prozac helped me when i was taking ssris #wonder why that is! #in case you dont know prozac is majorly successful w treating ocd #its one of the first things listed on its drugs.com treatment page

[lookingforhappy]

i feel like having five's mom be a butcher is such a misunderstanding of five and what his character means.

it implies that the violent, brutal actions he commits are in some way genetic/inherited, rather than cultivated after nearly five/six decades of desperate survival and manipulation. it implies that five was always going to become violent, that he had no chance at being soft or innocent because of his genetics.

and that, to me, takes away so much of the tragedy of his situation.

five doesn't want to be a killer, but he had to become one to have a chance at saving his family. he had to accept the handler's deal because if he didn't, if he refused to kill, he would be stuck in the apocalypse with no one but a mannequin to talk to and no clean water or stable food source or general quality of life.

five's brutality and willingness to kill was man-made and cultivated by the commission. sure, his already there traits helped to propel him towards this outcome, but it wasn't his first or even second choice.

depicting his mother as a butcher by itself is a betrayal of this character. but to also depict her as someone who loves this job, who has won awards for it, who takes pleasure from driving a knife through a slab of meat over and over again?

the implications of five having always enjoyed inflicting pain or of having that base instinct his entire life strips his character of agency, and makes his choice to sacrifice some of his humanity void. he didn't choose to become a killer for any higher purpose or sacrifice, but because he was always going to be that killer, because he enjoyed it.

#the umbrella academy #tua #five hargreeves #number 5 #obv this isn't like a criticism about butchers #ita about the context of this depiction #the amount of times fives mother has been juxtaposed next to five slaughtering the board in s2 really says everything tbh #its their replacement for the dna situation from the comics #except that five doesnt get to be fucked up over it #its played as a sort of joke #which really sums up s3 tbh #and five was the only one of the lot that got this treatment #the other 6 were shown as having come from loving families who likely wouldve kept them and loved them if not from reginald #personally if five had been shown as coming from a loving family #like the rest #then it would have been more impactful #bc he would have had yet another piece of love and care and childhood stolen from him like his training and years in the apocalypse and #the years spent killing for the commission #stole his childhood and really his entire life from him #idk man im reading too much into this but it rubbed me the wrong way

[agentjepsen]

something something early seasons sam&dean when they were looking for john and wondering if he was even alive and then his death and every horrible thing that comes after it with the caption as “But there's no other explanation. He's gone for good.” “You're lying.”“Am I? Do you remember the twentieth century? Think the twenty-first is going any better? Do you think God would have let any of that happen, if he were alive?” something something

#PROBABLY been done before but. the god and john mirroring is just sooooooo good it tickles my brain wonderfully #particularly was thinking abt this bc. ok so i started watching percy jackson. and i never read the books growing up so its new to me #and percy talking about the life long neglect from his father and how all the other kids at camp dont Know their parent. they have gifts #from them and Thats it. and from the way they behave when they are taken/broken (clarisse’s spear breaking. annabeth not wanting to lose her #cap) leads me to believe its one gift and thats all you will probably ever have of your parent #(and the journal and car being the Only things sam&dean have of john are like the gifts in that way) #your parent is a GOD a faceless god that you are to worship and follow without question. to not go against them or slight them in any way #(medusa’s head in the mall to olympus) #and it all made me think of john winchester and how he really doesn’t have that many episodes and hes still so PROMINENT #and in the flashbacks especially hes just barely out of sight out of reach. hes unknowable and will never be within grasp… #and still the chokehold he has on his children…. even in death #and like. i dont believe personally that john being dead led to sam&dean’s tragedies following in every season after that but the neglect #and treatment in life did. it shaped who they are and he let it happen. he created them #/revelation

[twistwhisker]

i think y'all's main problem is that you expect good, consistent writing from fucking warrior cats. like why are you doing that you're making things worse for yourselves.

#me? i never expect anything from wc and as such am never disappointed #its trash even by middle grade standards #like.. hating bramblestar makes sense bc his behavior toward squilf: #(1) stays consisent. he treated her the same back in tnp as he does now. a rare trait among wc characters ngl #(2) is never addressed. how he treats her is never called out as being particularly shitty. #sometimes an individual action will have ppl be like 'aw bramblestar that was a little mean :-/' but how he treats her in general is not #therefore it makes sense to hate him as a character #meanwhile basically any other character (other than one-offs like appledusk) that ppl try to compare to bramblestar #in order to make their dislike of them 'correct' and bully ppl who like that character #just falls flat bc they are not the same in a lore sense or a meta sense as bramblestar #imo the ONLY other character you can compare to bramblestar in being 'justified' in your hate of him #is breezepelt #bc he's a bad character in a lore sense (as in he is a bad person in canon like straight up evil) #but ALSO bad in a character sense (switches entire personality within arcs and suddenly he was good all along) #but even that its like. not as much as bramblestar you know?' #like bc no ones going to get the sense that murder is okay bc we ignored breezepelt's actions #but bramblestar's treatment of his wife can and will have real life effects on impressionable middle schoolers #and at this point its like the majority of the entire saga he's been treating her like shit #and not just one or two arcs where his character is different #its more similar to just standard bad wc writing than a bramblestar situation #x speaks #warriors #warrior cats #wc #thinking about when i got called homophobic for (1) not shipping mothpool and (2) kinda liking leafcrow #as if im not literally a lesbian

[thedominantambus]

Its time for your punishment! (turns into frog)

Furious peeping.

He is not pleased with this development.

--

[STATUS EFFECT: Dominus Ambus is now a Frog for the next HOUR!]

#:: looks like you didnt get away | ic :: #:: its the only way i know how | answered :: #m!a : froginus ambus #((shoulda known responding to newt mags would get me one o these)) #((ive barely been back a DAY and dom gets the Creechur Treatment lol))