#jesus jokes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jesusbutbetterrr · 5 months

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i thought of something that I personally think would be hilarious but I'm too tired to figure out how to word it but like

something something, new era, Dew doesn't have bass just like ...And Justice for All

#haha no bass #jesus jokes #someone knock me out already #he fucking left the band

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jokesjesus · 2 years

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The Three JCs

#jesus jokes #julius ceaser #jiang cheng #mdzs #jesus christ #ides of march

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brianfrench1995 · 8 months

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Jesus said, behold, I come quickly

#sign #jesus is coming #Jesus #jesus jokes #humor #funny signs #funny

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raychleadele · 2 years

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This week I went to visit my sister. She’s got two daughters, 5 and 3 years old. They’re fantastic, and I’ll fully admit I wanted to visit them more than I wanted to see my sister.

Because their family is still quite evangelical, I got to sit in on a couple brief family Bible study moments. Yesterday morning during one of these, the first of the Ten Commandments was discussed, “You will have no other gods before me.” As my sister was trying to explain to her young daughters what that means, the word ‘idolatry’ was used.

The 3 year old, suddenly looking very distressed, said “But we have a Dollar Tree!”

I absolutely lost my mind laughing while my sister tried to explain to the poor upset 3 year old that no, don’t worry honey, shopping at Dollar Tree isn’t a sin.

#personal #jesus jokes #this poor girl is going to need therapy in 20 years when she still feels immense guilt every time she goes to the dollar store

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itsdappleagain · 10 days

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jesus no

#transgender #jesus #comic #my art #anyone. is there an audience for this joke anywhere #image id is in the built in image description #trans #containment breach

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slashdementia7734 · 15 days

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#i got jokes #jesus jokes #jokes

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superbeans89 · 2 months

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What if Jesus wanted to scuba dive tho

#shitpost #random thoughts #scuba diving Jesus #jesus christ #Jesus jokes

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justjesus · 4 months

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Jesus was walking around Heaven one day. In a small, secluded garden He saw an old man, crying. Alarmed, Jesus ran up to him and said, “Hey, now, what’s all this? This is paradise. There should be no tears or sorrow.”

The old man wiped away his tears and said, “Oh, I know. I’m sorry. But… well, many years ago, a son came to me through… well, let’s say ‘mysterious circumstances’. After many trials he went through a miraculous transformation, and a book was written about him that became known the world over. I thought I would find him here, but I haven’t. I’m afraid I’ll never see him again.”

Wide-eyed, Jesus looked at the man and said, “Wait a minute… You weren’t, by any chance… a carpenter, were you?”

The man looked up in surprise. “Why, yes. Yes, I was!”

Jesus burst into tears of joy and held out His arms saying, “Father!”

The man cocked his head doubtfully and said, “Pinocchio???”

#jesus jokes

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salespeanut · 5 months

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I need a t-shirt that says “Jesus Saves” with Jesus sat at a computer saving a Microsoft file.

#Jesus jokes

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pianotrees · 5 months