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crisaunty · 3 days

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my faith is weak, i need his strength

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inhumanbeing · 2 days

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I'm feeling mildly blasphemous, so let's muppet-cast the bible.

Non-negotiable: Animal is Jon the Baptists. "RE-PENT, RE-PENT, RE-PENT!"

Jesus is the only Human.

Sweetums is that guy who was possessed by Legion, and then they were cast out into 'pigs' (it's the chicken-girls wearing fake pig snouts, since pigs are actual people in this world)

Up for debate: Statler and Waldorf are Anas and Caiaphas.

I am taking suggestions for more. Also, I think Sam the Eagle should be Pilate.

#muppet #muppets #the muppets #kermit the frog #kermit #bible #jesus #christianity #christian #faith #funny #comedy

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tomicscomics · 4 hours

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04/26/2024

It's a metaphor!

What's a meta for?

Nothin! What's a meta for you!

*wheezes for six minutes straight without taking a breath*

___

JOKE-OGRAPHY: 1. In this Bible story, Jesus describes Himself as a vine (like a grapevine), and His disciples as its branches. Branches can only bear fruit while connected to the main vine. If their connection is severed or tainted, they wither and die, and then they're pruned, suitable only for being tossed in a fire. Jesus is warning His disciples that their mission's fruitfulness depends on their continued, dedicated, healthy connection with Him and His Father. 2. In this cartoon, after hearing Jesus's metaphor, Peter declares that he and the other apostles (the "branches" in Jesus's metaphor) will "stick" with the vine. A "stick" is a long, thin piece of wood (like a branch), but "stick" can also mean "stay connected to." This is an inferior pun, because while the word "stick" has the two above meanings, only one of those meanings makes grammatical sense in Peter's comment (the latter). 3. Jesus replies that the vine (Him, in the metaphor) will be "rooting" for them. "Rooting" can either mean "laying down roots" (as in a tree growing its roots into the ground), or "cheering on" (like an audience cheering for a sports team). This is a superior pun to Peter's, because both meanings make grammatical sense in Jesus's comment. His declaration can be taken to mean either (1) that, as the vine, He'll provide the apostles with roots to nourish their fruitfulness, or (2) that, as their teacher, friend, and Lord, He'll be cheering them on and supporting them in their mission.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is another "Tomics Resurrection," where I have plucked the desiccated husk of an old cartoon from the withered branch of the past, and gorged it with so many steroids and hormones that it blasphemes nature but looks way more colorful! Also, it's been slightly reworded to flow better while maintaining the meaning of the passage; the disciples have been moved inside to the Last Supper, since this reading takes place either during or just after; and the image of the grapevine is in the second panel now, including a lush branch and a withered branch to illustrate what Jesus is saying. Tell me, how does it compare?

#catholic #christian #jesus #comic #cartoon #catholic memes #jesus memes #christian memes #tomics #bible #peter #st peter #apostles #vine #branches #metaphor #whats a meta for #nothin whats a meta for you

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welcome-to-alice-in-helll · 2 days

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#creepy #southern gothic #ethel cain #jesus #bible #church #religious trauma #drugblr #morute #angel #haunted #ghosts #funny sign #weird #grunge #dark grunge

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political-past · 20 hours

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#acowar #sans au #spun alone #physics #sky ferreira #+18 or +adult only #girls who do dope #vanessa bohorquez #Jesus #humor #alexander the great #tom sturridge #briefs bulge

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upliftourday · 3 days

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lilaccoffin · 2 days

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I spent way longer on these than I should have...

#IT WAS JUST 12 AM ONE SECOND AGO AND NOW ITS 12:42?!?!!?#JESUS #hi fi rush #chai #peppermint #macaron #CNMN #korsica

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walkswithmyfather · 2 days

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#proverbs 13:20 #bible #christian blog #god #belief in god #faith in god #jesus #belief in jesus #faith in jesus #wisdom #god's wisdom #encouragement #keep the faith #make him known

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all-saints-rise · 3 days

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#bible verse #jesus #christianity #make him known

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gospel-art-project · 2 days

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#make him known #jesus #christianity #share the gospel

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godslove · 2 days

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walkthroughtheword · 3 days

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Dear God, please help me to be steady when the storms hit. I don’t want to get thrown around by my emotions or concerns. I want to abide in Jesus Christ, my rock and my foundation. I want to be like Jesus who, in the face of pain and adversary, looked to you. I pray for all of this in the strong name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

#love #faith #god #jesus #holy #bible #scripture #walkthroughtheword #dailydevotional #devotional

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kolyviahrosette · 24 hours

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Take care of the family God has given you.

Part of me waited to feel like I had a "family" because it wouldn't feel official until my husband and I had a child of our own. I'm learning to feel blessed with the family God has given me in this season of my life, and take care of them how I would take care of my familial ideal.

My husband and I recently moved into a new home, and my sister in law and her husband are renting the spare room from us. Since we've all moved in together I've learned how much I enjoy taking care of everyone, from cooking, to cleaning, to encouraging their ambitions. I never expected this to be the case, but God has truly opened my eyes to how a Christian woman can be a homemaker even when she has no children.

This might look different for you. Perhaps you an adult daughter still living with her parents and siblings. Take care of them. Perhaps you are a college student with roommates. Take care of them. Perhaps you live alone in an apartment complex, but have many elderly neighbors on your floor. Invite them to dinner, and take care of them.

God is faithful to lead us to a community, but sometimes we get distracted by the fact that it isn't the ideal we see for ourselves, and overlook our ability to serve and love them nonetheless. I've been thinking a lot about how I would feel if I found out we would never be able to have kids — and whether I could be happy homemaking for a family that didn't consist of my children.

I think I could, but this realization has come only through God opening my eyes to the fact that we are all His children, brothers and sisters in Christ — family by default, and all responsible to serve one another.

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avengers-21 · 11 hours

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today’s verse ✨

“And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭7‬ ‭KJV‬‬

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kruemel8 · 3 hours

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Via Omar IG.

#omar rudberg #ysl #elle galan #jesus

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momentsbeforemass · 1 day

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What are you holding onto?

What we hold onto matters. Because you and I can only carry so much.

Even though we often act like there’s no limit to what we can carry.

The truth is that everything we pick up, everything we hold onto reduces our capacity to carry other things.

When I would carry my cat (who would randomly decide that he was incapable of movement and was now a limp noodle), I couldn’t also pick up my dog (who had no idea that he weighed 75 pounds) just because he saw the cat and decided that he wanted to be carried as well.

Sorry. I can only carry so much.

That’s not just true for goofy house pets. It’s true for life in general.

Whether we’re talking about pets or groceries, worries or cares, you and I can only carry so much.

And if our hands are full of worries and cares, problems and anxieties, you and I won’t have the capacity to carry other things.

Including things we might actually want (as opposed to worries and cares). Including the good stuff. Like God’s best for our lives.

What works against you and me is habit. We get in a habit of picking stuff up and carrying it around. Just because it wants us to pick it up and carry it around.

Like my limp noodle cat. Who wanted to be carried.

But who would also make a miraculous recovery and start doing unnecessary parkour off the top of the couch. If I didn’t pick him up.

What you and I need to remember is that we have a choice. Just because something wants you to pick it up and carry it around doesn’t mean you have to.

I’m not saying don’t deal with your worries and cares, your problems and anxieties.

But there’s a big difference between dealing with your worries and cares - and picking them up and carrying them around like a beloved pet.

So, how do you do that?

First, know that you have a choice. Then know that you have help.

You don’t have to deal with your worries and cares (or even carry them around) by yourself.

In fact, you shouldn’t. Because holding onto your worries and cares, your problems and anxieties is one of the subtlest forms of the dreary old sin of pride.

And there is nothing so effective at separating you and me from the ones who love us best (including God) like pride. It does that by making sure that our hands are full, that we have no room for the good that anyone would do for us (including God).

Instead, take the help offered by the One who loves you best.

No matter what it is. No matter what wants you to pick it up and carry it around.

God isn’t just waiting to help you. God wants to help you.

Not someday, when you’ve got it all figured out. But right now, when you don’t.

“Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares about you.”

Today’s Readings

#Help #Now #What are you holding onto?#Holding onto #Trying to carry it all #Cats #Dogs #God #Jesus #Catholic #Christian #Church #Catholicism #Moments Before Mass

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