My Testimony of the Lord Jesus Christ
Three years ago, my sister gave me a Bible which I started reading.
I started Genesis, and then went to John. I was confused.
Very confused.
Someone called Jesus of Nazareth claiming to be God? Have I heard of something like this before?
It was hard to believe.
I was assured that God existed, but showing his revelation as a human being? It seems impossible to me. Raising up from the dead, going up to heaven, and then the end? Really?
I had a lot of questions when I finished John.
My brother-in-law Stan recommended to me Hampton Roads
So my brother-in-law showed me the parable of the rich man and Lazarus in Luke 16. When I finished reading it, I was terrified. Being tormented in eternal fires forever?
So I inquired to my brother-in-law about my faith. He mentioned that since I kept talking to him, I must have some sort of faith.
In Hebrews 11:6, it is said, “Without faith, it is impossible to please God.”
So I continued to read the Gospels, finishing up with Matthew.
The Apostle Paul said, in his letter to one of his disciples Titus, that God can't lie
Later in late 2017, I felt like I was a lukewarm Christian. I had stomach problems and suicidal thoughts, even thinking about killing myself on New Years 2018.
Oh boy, was that a tough time for me.
When my dad said that isolation is the devil’s workshop, oh boy, was he not kidding.
2018 was one of my hardest years for me.
Graduated with no plan. Planned on going to Air Force but recruiter was ignoring me and acting uninterested when I came to the recruiting office. Disagreement with my parents. Learned that I had autism. Was mistreated at my first job.
2019 was a better year for me. I signed up with an organization that paid for my schooling, attended therapy at a consistent basis, and had a better relationship with my family. I had a consistent job for the first time. I received a lot of blessings that I didn’t deserve. But grace is God and He showed a lot of grace to me.
“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast” (Ephesians 2:8–9)
The beginning of 2020 seemed promising. Once 2020 started, I felt a peace unimaginable.
But then the Coronavirus pandemic hit, it seemed weird.
In May, I received my first full-time job. But later in late June, my clearance was denied for some unknown reason but the investigation is still ongoing.
The first verse of Ecclesiastes chapter 1 says: “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…”.
Trying to figure out what is next for you is one of the hardest things to do for me. What was my next season?
So I started to attend church more often.
My assistant pastor was beginning to start a young men’s ministry. I remember the first meeting I went to, I started to talk to them about trusting God and having His best interests.
Even in retrospect, I don’t know what went over me.. What I felt like God’s Spirit was helping me. My pastor complimented me on my growth
I started up a group chat, which is going pretty good. I am glad God gave me the opportunity to put His people together.
Often starting a relationship with Christ seems exciting, like a romance. But then it starts getting hard. The enemy often deceives people, even me, by thinking that a relationship with God means that everything is going to be good.
But no, life gets much harder.
The enemy wants you to give up. But being a Christian is the biggest challenge you will ever face. It is a spiritual battle between a just God and a fallen angel who wants revenge by taking everyone and everything down with him.
But the good news is, Jesus’ crucifixion sealed victory for those who have faith in God. Faith is confident victory, and the hardest thing to be assured of that. Imagine how hard it is to be confident in your victory.
But Christ tells us to be watchful, for any second He may return. We must prepare and train for our Master’s return.
The Bible is a Book where a lot of people claim to know, but they don’t really believe it. A lot of people know John 3:16, but don't believe it.
How can 66 books over the course of a thousand years agree on the same thing? That’s impossible for our minds to comprehend.
Even the Gospels work like eyewitnesses where they coincidentally agree with each other. Two of the authors were a doctor and a fisherman, and they each agreed with each other on the same subject.
I couldn’t believe this.
And the fact that people who believe in this Jesus of Nazareth all died horrible deaths?
People don’t understand that Christianity is not a religion, but a relationship with God, who apparently loved us so much that He came down as a human to die for us. Even the religious people hated Jesus, so how can Christianity be considered a religion?
You can’t practice a relationship with God? Right?
This God knew that He couldn’t accept evil in His presence, so He had to suffer by His own rules. He was tormented day and night by the pain He was going to endure. He had to confront evil and let Himself be a sacrifice. He became creation to die for creation… weird, right?
The Bible is a romance story where God died for humanity who turned their backs on Him. At least it was a better love story than Twilight, that’s for sure.
It is bizarre, but I have learned to lose the questions. I can ask God a million questions that He has a million answers to, but God can ask me a million questions that I don’t have a single answer to.
I had to accept that I can’t be strong alone. I have to accept that I don’t have my best interests. If Jesus, who said He was God, died for my sins and paid the penalties on my behalf… maybe He has my best interests.
I was in a burning building that I was unaware of, but Someone knocked some sense in me and He led me out.
I was feeling suicidal and thought that I was going to die in 2015, but I guess God said, “Nope, I am not done with you.”
So He gave me an invitation to repent from my sins and accept salvation, which means the act of being delivered, redeemed, or rescued. Hey, if it means that I don’t have to face... my personal hell, I will accept it. I was ignoring the invitation until recently. Salvation is not a thing, but it is a Person.
C.S. Lewis once said, “There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, in the end, "Thy will be done.".
I have been rescued from my demons, but I have to continue to defend and guard my mind and heart.
I believe that we are in spiritual warfare right now. I believe something out there doesn't want us here. I may be paranoid or something, but I believe someone out here doesn't want me giving you this message.
There is an invitation that I would like to give you to eternal rest. Trust Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Keep Him the center of your life. He commands His students to continue to share His invitation.
Something about the Bible is it is best if you start from back to front. Because the beginning is... strange. Start with the Book of Luke, John, and then Acts.
It is unbelievable the work He did in me. He accepted me how I was, but He changed me for the better.
Don’t worry about people and the stuff that is going on in the world. They are not on your radar and don’t have anything to offer to you.
Accept a God who has everything to offer to you. He may not give us everything we want, but He gave us what we need: life.
If you managed to read all of this, thank you for your patience.
I know this is a lot to say, but I guess this was something God wanted me to do. I have to keep reminding myself that He is a Person, so I have to consider His feelings into account. He wants me to spread the good news as much as I can.
He had no problem putting my sin on, so I have to put on His righteousness. Trust me, it is not easy. Every day is mentally exhausting.
The invitation is ready when you are ready.
Pass this message on to anyone who needs it.
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