#like don't get me wrong I am someone who is for a two state solution too | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

koheletgirl · 5 months

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Would love to hear about how you became an anti Zionist!

before i get into this, i'd like to direct you to some of @jewishvitya's posts: [x] [x] [x]. i think their perspective is more relevant to the current situation than mine, and they address issues that i won't get into here because they had no personal relevance to me and you asked about me.

so my family is considered left-wing in israel. my parents voted for ha'avoda (israeli labor) in most elections i can remember, my mom even went "as far" as voting for meretz (as far as jewish parties go, they're the furthest to the left. still zionist though. didnt get enough votes to get into the knesset in the last elections). i grew up mourning rabin, hating bibi before i even knew who he was, believing that the settlements are the source of all israeli wrongdoings. in 2005 people would put ribbons on their cars – green if you support dismantling the settlements in gaza, orange if you're against it. we had a green ribbon. my family talks about the two states solution, about going back to the '67 borders. my grandmother jokingly calls herself a "leftist traitor", because that's how the right labels them.

i grew up with these values. i was taught to value human life, i was taught that all people were equal, i was taught that nationalism and imperialism were wrong. we weren't afraid of talking about the occupation. we weren't afraid of calling israeli fascism what it was. you might have heard about the democracy protests that have been happening in israel in the past year; my parents went every week.

i think this is why it took me so long to break out of my zionist worldview. people talk about zionism as if it's explicitly genocidal and built on racial supremacy, and i understand why (and agree with this to an extent), but you have to understand how absurd this idea sounds to people like my parents. they don't think zionism is the issue, they think the israeli right is. they acknowledge the evils of the settlers in the west bank, but they would never consider themselves settlers. it's very easy to see the wrongness of a person going to someone's house and violently kicking a family out of there because they believe it should belong to them (not a hypothetical, this is happening in the west bank as we speak); it's a lot harder to think that maybe everything you were taught to believe about your own right to be here was a lie from the beginning.

and that's the problem, that it is a lie. we are literally taught there was nothing here. swamps and malaria and sand and sand. the zionists built a civilization out of nothing. that's the story, that's the myth.

another aspect of this that's essential to acknowledge is the dehumanization of palestinians in israel, which is still prevalent in leftist circles, despite taking a different form. the israeli left Loves to make the distinction between palestinians and "israeli arabs" - a term that some people that i have met have used for themselves, and i am not the right person to speak on (i'm sure there's nuance here i'm unaware of). these people don't think of themselves as racists. they don't mind arabs in general, they only mind "the arabs who want to harm us". and it's so easy for them to pat themselves on the back because they have plenty of arab friends and they actively oppose the goverment's racism; but they all draw the line when it comes to palestinians. to them, once a person calls themselves a palestinian, it means they believe jews have no right to exist here. it means their existence is at odds with their own. they don't see palestinians as people, they see them as an agenda.

i was going to add a bit about how the israeli left's aversion to religion (which stems from the influence orthodox jews currently have on israeli law) plays into this, but this is getting really long.

anyway. for me, it wasn't a revelation as much as it was a willingness to open my eyes to the fact that everything i had been taught was a lie. it was always there, this doubt, this uneasiness. i knew that there were a lot of people over the world whose opinions i generally agreed with – except when it came to israel. it just took me a really long time to be able to doubt Everything.

because that required tearing down everything my worldview was based on, everything i had believed in, and it was scary. it's a very, very difficult thing to do. not knowing what to believe is horrifying. realizing you have believed in lies your whole life is horrifying.

but at some point i had to ask myself: how can i hate everything this country stands for, and not doubt what it's taught me? how can i know what i know about the idf, and still believe it's acting humanely? and the thing is, i still don't know what to believe a lot of the time. i still doubt everything, all the time. i'm critical of all of my beliefs, and i think it's good to be. but i listen, and i look, and i feel, and above all i try to be compassionate. and there's only one stance you can take here if you value human life above all else.

here are some israel-based organizations that influenced my political views and i recommend checking out (even though i have my disagreements with them): b'tselem, standing together, breaking the silence, mesarvot

#ask #anon #israel #mmm idk what else to tag this #i had to stop myself at some point but know that obviously there's a lot more to it than what i sad

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why-animals-do-the-thing · 1 year

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hi there! love your work! i recently had a prof say that all zoos (USA) are bad (so we shouldn't support them) and sanctuaries are better because using animals for entertainment is morally wrong, most zoo profits dont go to conservation, and conservation efforts are bandaid solutions to capitalism destroying animal habitats, so the real solution is to return the land to indigenous stewards to manage/rewild. i didn't disagree with the last bit, but the argument as a whole felt a little off to me for a reason i couldnt put my finger on. am i off base here? just feeling really unsure about the whole thing.

You're not wrong! There's a mix of reality and personal opinions in those statements, and it's definitely something worth critically examining. A quick fact-check of what they said for you:

All US zoos are bad

There's a massive range of quality of zoological facilities within the US (and around the world). Some are stellar and some are not, and it's really just not accurate to lump them all under the same umbrella for almost any purpose. Unless, of course, your issue isn't with animal welfare, and it's philosophical, which is what it sound like in #2...

2. Using animals for entertainment is morally wrong.

This is one of my favorite things to talk about w/r/t how we exhibit animals. Entertainment has become equated with exploitation and implicit low welfare in the last couple decades, and so you get a lot of people saying using animals for entertainment is wrong. But those same folk will say that they enjoy seeing animals in other contexts, and they think that's okay. Where's the line between enjoying something and being entertained by it? What makes something one and not the other? Also, we know that people learn better from from situations which are enjoyable/entertaining - even just a fun teacher who jokes around vs a dry lecture - so how can that only be a problem when it's used to make viewing animals more impactful? I wrote a whole piece on this a while back (linked here) if you want to dig into this more. Some zoos (and accrediting groups) are shying away from "entertainment" type branding - shows are demos now, for instance - and others are leaning into "edutainment" that's done with good welfare and communicates actual education messaging. In short, this is a personal philosophical belief, and you're right to question if you agree. (Even if you decide you do think that too! It's always good to question why someone is arguing what they believe about animal use, and how they came to believe it).

3. Sanctuaries are better than zoos.

There's two reasons I think he's misinformed here. First, almost all exotic animal sanctuaries in the US are licensed exhibitors - just like zoos! I only know of a couple that don't exhibit to the public at all. It's an important part of their revenue stream, because gate take helps support paying for animal care. Also anything you see from a sanctuary on Youtube, Facebook, or TikTok? Also exhibition! They just message about it differently, and often have a different ethos about how they exhibit (e.g. tours to reduce stress instead of letting people wander, doing conservation or rescue messaging instead of just display). Second... look, most people assume that the word "sanctuary" means a facility is intrinsically more ethical than a zoo, and therefore they must be a good place. In reality, many sanctuaries get much less public and regulatory scrutiny (at the state level) than most zoos. There are good sanctuaries out there, but there are also sanctuaries where stuff goes on that would absolutely be unacceptable at zoos, and it slides because of the assumption that sanctuaries are inherently more moral and ethical and care for their animals better.

4. Most zoo profits don't go to conservation

This is correct! Direct conservation funding is often a small part of the money a zoo makes. However, that's because money goes to things like facility maintenance, new construction, paying salaries, etc. If zoos put all the money they made back into conservation programs, practically, they wouldn't have the funding to continue to operate. The question that I'd suggest asking instead is "where are they putting money into conservation" and "are they doing conservation work or just throwing money at something to display the logo of the program." Also, it's worth keeping in mind that a lot of what zoos do to support conservation isn't necessarily financial. Many facilities contribute "in-kind", by doing things like sending staff to assist with programs or teach specific skills, or by donating things like vehicles and equipment. Research zoos do also seriously contributes to in-situ programs, and breeding programs for re-introduction like the scimitar-horned oryx and the black-footed ferret are also conservation. Could many of the big urban facilities with huge budgets do more? Yes. But looking just at dollars spent on conservation programs is disingenuous and inaccurate.

5. Conservation efforts are band-aid solutions to capitalism destroying habitats / Returning the land to indigenous peoples to manage/rewild is the real solution to conservation issues

This is a little outside my scope so I'm going to only address the part that I know. First off, like, there's no One True Answer to conservation issues. That's reductionist and inaccurate. Conservation really is a human issue, though, and it often has to involve solving human problems that lead to negative results for animals. There's definitely an issue with what some people call "parachute conservation" where Westerners swoop in and try to tell people living in range countries how to best manage their animals and natural resources without recognizing their perspectives, needs, or what drives their behavior towards those animals. That's not just a zoo issue - that's an issue with a ton of traditional Western conservation work. And there is progress towards fixing it! In the zoo world, I've been very impressed with the work out of The Living Desert, where their conservation people spend a lot of time overseas teaching people in range countries to evaluate and improve their own conservation programs, so they can assess efficacy and also have data to apply for grants, etc. They provide support when asked, rather than trying to tell people who live with these animals regularly what to do. One of my favorite programs that TLD collaborates with (they don't try to run it!) is a group called the Black Mambas that reduces poaching by supporting entire communities to reduce the desperation for food/income, educating kids about animals, and running all-female patrols staffed by community members.

Overall, it sounds like your professor's view of zoos is really informed by their personal moral perspective, and possibly reinforced by a lot of the misinformation / misleading messaging that exists about the industry and about conservation work. They do have some specifics right, but not necessarily the context to inform why things are like that. It was a good catch to question the mix of information and approach it critically.

#zoo industry #zoo information #philosophy around zoos and what they do #conservation #zoo questions

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behindthewox · 1 month

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Hello, Andrew here. This blog article was sent to me and I can assure you that this is not correct information but a reaction likely of those who were involved. This information likely stems from previous MoM or HM themselves, I guess, seeing that they have been banned properly recently (which I am only stating because you already stated it yourself, otherwise I would not give away who is or is not banned)

When I took over I made it very clear in an NB post that the harrassment of users, witch hunt on site, and generally toxic and disrespectful behaviour needs to stop. Everyone is more than welcome to share opinions, but this was not that, this was simply insanely rude behaviour that was based on wrong information given by the MoM/HM to the other leaders of WoP, who then compiled their letter. Which is also the reason why after all of this these other site leaders were put back into their positions after everything was cleared up.

I have banned a total of 4 people from 800-900 actives at the time for continuing their disrespectful behaviour and outright slandering (one of them later on) despite my very clear warning in the article (I was surprised that it was only so few, but almost everyone was just glad to be able to enjoy the website again). I also made an effort to respond to each single comment transparently and open minded. Many of the people who removed content or joined that group hype have talked to me, told me their opinions, and gave me the opportunity to work on their missing trust together. I am on good terms with almost all of the old staff with maybe 5 exceptions (MoM, HM for being the reason this went down and one old staff on bad terms; the other two people I am neutral towards as I never spoke with them and don't know their thoughts) Every old staff member who reached out to me has their own experiences and opinioms and don't always agree with me, but they are more than valued and often play important roles in our staff as well - whether student or grad. In fact, I really enjoyed every single talk with them and appreciate anyone who reached out despite their fear of rejection, as that takes a lot of courage

The old MoM and HM were banned later on, yes, you can feel free to ask them for the exact reason I put in. The previous behaviour of theirs is unwelcome on site, and they created a horrible environment for people at the time this happened, just because of a "money grabbing" feature that was completely changed back anyway for other reasons. One of them was still logging in on alt for reasons I don't really understand, because they made sure everyone knew their hate towards Dan and the site. So why log in almost regularly even after almost a year? I guess I know why ,but that is just an assumption, so I will not voice it here

Aside from that, if you paid attention to the site development, you would also see that since then (but not because of that), new users got free VIP, people with jobs get discount, linking accounts gets a whole 50% discount, and such

I am mostly replying to clear some things up because I don't enjoy reactions that are based on false facts. I wanted to stay on WoP US as a temporary solution, but the community has been loving and welcoming, which was really unexpected considering the circumstances they went through

This is something that happened almost a whole year ago now, I even unbanned one of the 4 bans that took place when I took over, so technically it is only 3

I hope that this could clear up confusion and misunderstanding. I would like to see this message public because I am mostly writing it for the very few that might end up seeing it. Considering the nature of this post, you already made up your mind about me and that is okay. But I want to give my insight first hand, as I don't enjoy someone trying to slander my name based on more accusations of those people who were banned for false accusations in the first place

Magical regards,

Andrew Sutherland (WoP US)

By the way, I am only asking this anonymously because of privacy concerns regarding this account (never use Tumblr anyway)

Added in a later message: "Andrew here again, please add this xD I saw that you have made clarifications regarding there possibly being more to these accusations, my response was mainly aimed towards the person asking the question, but I do admit that I thought that that message was originally from you, the blog writer, and only saw your response later on (I am not used to tumblr and on phone it doesnt show all on one screen, oops). Just wanted to clarify that as it may explain some wording of mine!"

No hard feelings on my side, thanks for the clarification! If I can share both sides of the story, that is what I want to do and you've allowed me to share yours. It's greatly appreciated and I hope this clears the air a little bit.

NOTE: I can't verify if this person is who they say they are, the anonymous submissions are anonymous to me as well. I have no reason to doubt or suspect that it's someone else writing in their name, but I want to note that with anonymity there is a risk of abuse and impersonation. I don't think that's the case here though.

#wox #wox site

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lovely-oh-so-lovelyyui · 2 years

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I feel like we, in the DL fandom, do not talk about how the Church organization people who send in the brides, are fucking trash as well to make a deal with Karlheinz, send in young girls who have faith in them to a bunch of sadistic 100+ year brats who torment them for sport, all for the “greater good” of humanity (ofc young women have to be sacrificed 🙄). Like, THEY should be risking themselves (they’re vampire hunters, like Seiji) for the sake of humanity, not these clueless, young girls.

Yes! I totally agree with you as much as I like portraying Yui’s childhood as something idyllic and much happier than her current state. It's undeniable the church is at partial fault for the atrocities and tragedies committed by the boys.

Now as controversial as it sounds the boys are not wrong to feed or hunt humans for blood, it makes sense for their father to set up a feeding system so there would be less disarray.

I mean it makes sense, according to the Diabolik lovers wiki page all of the demon clans can feed on blood however vampires are the only ones who gain nutrients from it.

This makes them natural predators of humans, as a race you can't expect them to starve so being sent to humans only seem as natural as humans slaughtering livestock. They are royal too, obviously, their blood supply would be of fine quality, so “pure blood” I'm assuming is healthy girls who don't eat junk food, haven’t smoked or drank or even touched drugs which is why a church is such a perfect cover. Also, I think the whole virgin thing doesn't play a part, it's probably an old wives’ vampire tale but knowing someone's dick hasn't been in your lunch probably makes it much more appetising.

Now, this under no circumstances means I'm defending the boys, I am looking at it from your average vampire’s viewpoint discarding human morality of well putting “an innocent lamb” for slaughter mentality.

But it's very apparent because both vampires and humans are intelligent creatures with free will. The silver line between a food source and an inferior race is very blurred. I will extend the difference on this another day but I'll focus on the actual church feeding system from what I've gathered; I just wanted to portray it from a different point of view for all those who rightly disagree with the sacrificial bride system.

Now don’t get me wrong if used correctly I think the sacrificial bride system is pretty great if you tweak some areas if you have a voluntary group of individuals who get paid to let the boys feed from them with full knowledge and consent of what’s going on as well as full insurance on their safety it is far more practical then no feeding system at all. What makes this feeding system even better is that it’s backed by both the vampire nobility and human hunters. Both are sides that have been at war for who knows how long and have had tremendous impacts on both sides, whether they be socio-political, or financial and physical.

See how on paper this looks like the perfect theoretical solution, but the show hints to us that there’s a lot more corruption involved.

I didn’t plan for this to become headcanons but here we go I guess:

I'm assuming Yui is not the only church girl who is kept unaware of the vampire's existence but one of the only girls who hold any relation to a vampire hunter probably plot armour.

Vampires and humans dislike each other. This is not new, they've probably been at war for centuries and whilst humans are extremely adaptable but the only reason they could reach a truce with the vampires is probably that they became a nuisance to the vampires and this would be the lesser of two evils for the church.

The funding comes from the vampires, each hunter gets as much money as the girls they send, and the girls that are sent must be of the highest quality.

Docile, sweet, easy on the eyes and most importantly with good-tasting blood.

However the war is over, and there are truces and pacts. The original hunters are replaced and hand their titles down to their eldest son and the training to prepare continues, but traditions and principles become lax, and discipline is lost.

Nepotism and corruption don’t take long to consume the system, the men bid the girls in between themselves selecting which church sends the most girls for funding.

Many smaller factions soon join under the powerful ones, you would think the church that doesn't sell as many girls would be happier no?

No.

The funding is taken away and the church is forced to give up and sell its girls to the bigger factions.

The girls are monitored closely, indoctrinates with weak morals, and made as vulnerable and trusting as possible, the not as pretty girls are given into the red light streets for spare change, and some are promoted to nuns only to take care of the new batch of girls or giving birth to them.

And the rest is history, the cycle continues. the vampires long predicted this as human nature repeats itself often.

#diabolik lovers headcanon #diabolik lovers #diahell #yui komori #headcanon #dl headcanons #diabolil lovers lore #church lore #yui lore #reiji sakamaki #ayato sakamaki #shu sakamaki

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abigail-pent · 3 months

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will probably delete this later, but... saw a post yesterday that bugged the shit out of me. didn't want to add comments on it because g-d knows I don't need tumblr harassment in my life, of all things, but...

there is an incredibly Western impulse to say Israel is colonialist and therefore we should expect decolonization in that area to look like it did in South Africa or pretty much anywhere else that European nations colonized. and when you say this, it's like... tell me you have no grasp of Jewish history without telling me you have no grasp of Jewish history. tell me you think all Israelis are white colonizers without using those words.

you simply cannot expect that a nation largely composed of *refugees* and the *descendants of refugees* will be treated the same way white South Africans were. or should expect to be treated that way. Western leftist goyim have really taken the "Jews are White > Israel is White" thing way too far... even when we are, which is far less often than many think, we are more often than not treated as acceptable targets for violence because we are Jews. This is simply not true for White former British citizens. their historical experience is not our historical experience. violent antisemitism, including pogroms and massacres, was ALWAYS a feature of diaspora before the creation of the state of Israel, and it's naive to expect that violent antisemitism wouldn't also be a common feature of a post-Israel world. especially when Hamas had "death to the Jews" in its charter for ages, and the Houthis have it now, and Iran has something like it too and funds them both. and yes, I know Hamas took that out of its charter in 2018, but... if you think that the quiet part stops existing when you stop saying it out loud, then I have a bridge to nowhere I'd like to sell you.

like. metaphors have their time and their place. this is not it. some situations are simply not like every other situation that you think kind of looks similar to it on a surface level. I think Westerners in particular find it incredibly easy to look at conflicts in parts of the world they know very little about and go "oh yes, so x is just like y thing we have over here" and ... not everything is. and you'll walk yourself right into a trap of oversimplification if you do that. not to mention that there's a certain arrogance to saying that "x is like y, we solved y already, so why don't you just adopt our solution for x?" it's a kind of chauvinism to assume that x has no important features that Westerners didn't already account for in solving y. it's essentially saying that you think non-Westerners are backwards for not having implemented solution y already.

but most of all it just feels like goyische leftists in the West will tie themselves into all sorts of pretzel knots to feel ok adopting the same slogans as people who have told us and shown us, over and over, that they're interested in committing violence against Jewish people. what happened to "when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time"?

like... of course that's not what everyone who uses a certain slogan means by that. but there are a lot of people who do mean that. and when both those with and without violent intentions use the same slogan, we can't tell the difference between the two. so tell me, what's the cautious way to approach someone who has like a 1/3 chance of wanting to do you harm? on an interpersonal level, you avoid them.

like don't get me wrong - here's the official Online Jewish Disclaimer - I am very anti Likud, very anti Netanyahu, very anti war crimes no matter who is committing them. but I do not know or pretend to know how to solve this conflict and achieve a lasting peace. and I wish more people understood that you can't arrive at a real solution by erasing one party's current reality or historical experience.

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yuusaris · 7 months

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Life Update

My ~*Partial Hospitalization Program*~ is over!

TW: cat death, suicidal ideation

To the people who were able to help support me and my family financially for the bit - y'all honest to God got us to my paycheck without a single sweat. It was like breathing fresh air - disability hasn't come in yet and it was a daunting looking week. It was really, truly helpful, every dollar counted, every charge got paid without negatives.

Soooo part of the reason for my program happening - there were a lot of reasons that compounded over the year so far. Y'all might know we lost Hammond at the very beginning of the year, but what wasn't mentioned was that I have a hefty blame on myself for what happened, and I'm not going into details on it. I had a messy falling out with a very dear friend and my bankruptcy filing has not started yet because it's daunting in the face of grief. We also lost our second source of income this year (another falling out and another death), we lost another family member, my job ended up hefting more responsibilities onto me as well as the ones I had gotten away with neglecting and through all of it, I socialized with exactly zero people, zero times about it.

I don't have a family that's very... emotionally intelligent? Problems are met with solutions and pick-me-ups, not with empathy so, it wasn't like I was comfortable speaking with them - my dad distinctly said my suicidal ideations were 'selfish' and we are not on speaking terms at the moment because of it.

I vented to a friend or two, once or twice, but it always came with the idea that I was burdening someone. This perception of myself as a social parasite, draining what I want and leaving people dry, is one that kept me from talking to people I regarded as friends and also kept me from thinking well of myself in public - I realized in my PHP that I attribute my value to the interactions I have with people. Strangers, family, friends, cashiers. If it's a person, they determine my value. So I try to net a positive value as much as I can. Which means "not using people for my own comfort or assurance or entertainment" - the aware people reading this may recognize that as 'an attribute of friendship that friends are there for'. I still haven't gotten around to talking to some of my online friends yet and - I don't have many in real life. I work from home, and left my home state in 2019 to be with my husband and his family, it felt a lot like they were tolerating me because of him. Even though I knew they weren't.

I don't really have any hobbies that aren't something to show off either - I write fic for me, but I haven't posted anything all year because I've had so little investment in my productive hobbies... of which writing is the only one. And when I don't have that I have video games until my eyeballs bleed.

I'm writing this all out to both shake myself of the idea that this is me infodumping in order to "manipulate you all into giving money in the future" (I'm aware I'm not, and I am not), or "make people say nice things about me while I do nothing for them to soothe my ego" (I can want validation/nice things said that make me feel good without treatijng people badly or it being about my value) or "just wanna read my own writing voice" (There's also just - nothing wrong with that??) or any other bad things.

It's just... my blog and my journey and I wanted to level with the people who care about me here about what's been going on and where I'm at and that... I dunno. That I'm a work in progress? And everyone is? And asking for help regardless of from who or what is different from mooching off people because the intent and the care for those people is entirely different and if you're really a burden, they wouldn't help you and I need to get it in my head that I'm just - allowed to talk to people about things that are wrong or sad or just even ask if even online peeps like y'all wanna do online stuff is still - social and allowed to be asked from me and not just of me and - lots of stuff.

And I'm allowed to do things on my own and talk to new people without feeling like a weirdo and a wretch cuz I'm not a weirdo and a wretch and typing and posting that this is how I feel is not guilt-tripping nor is it infodumping because it's my blog and my negative thoughts that aren't true. And I'm allowed to say they're not.

....

I'm gunna be doing an Intensive Outpatient Program starting tomorrow - it's similar, but shorter and less days of the week. By the time I start, disability should kick in, and I might even be able to apply for disability for the work hours I miss. I'll be looking into that on Monday.

In the meantime - I'm making Magic: The Dathering decks again! I'm gunna try to start an indoor garden - I'm embracing possibly becoming a Green Witch, but it's hard to find witchcraft stuff that doesn't refer to God or Goddesses - and deity-on-a-level-above-me worship, I've learned, is... pretty triggering for me, regarding practicing faith. We also got - so, in January, we got our baby Jungle, and in April we got Sandy and Sandy's training to be our ESA, and I wanna talm to taylor about if I can post pictures but the point is, I am a cat mama again, and they make me feel worthwhile in a way that's not about my value but is about my feeling fulfilled.

So - things are looking up! I'm going to more library programs as well, visiting old haunts and getting back into socializing outside but also - maybe online spaces soon as well. Becoming a person again, y'know?

Really - thank everyone, bumpers and likers and doners, for everything. It meant a lot to be able to ask for help and get it and know that I can just... ask people for things, not even money, just.... for help.

Thanks.

#me flavored soup #tw suicide mention #tw suicide ideation #tw animal death mention #tw animal death #y'know i promised myself i wouldn't cry on my own post but then i remembered that's part of what put me in a PHP program #you'd be surprised how many jokes do not fly anymore when you're trying to be emotionally and mentally healthy

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molovestuff · 1 year

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Ok, I'm curious. Is it that controversial to think polyamorous relationships sound fun, or am I just surrounded by monogamous people?

Every time the topic comes up in my friend group, I say a polyam relationship would be amazing because 1) I instantly assume all partners are comfortable with it and they get along well, or directly love each other romantically. 2) Having stated that it's a mutual agreement and everyone's happy with it; you basically have a whole group of people supporting and loving each other. If I wanted to go watch a horror movie but my partner hates them, I could ask the other and no problem. If someone's emotional needs can't be met at the moment by one person, someone else could assist them and be there for them (and it wouldn't end in a big argument). And with me being ace, I wouldn't mind if my partners had sex to satisfy their needs if I really decide I don't like it at all; they can come to me for anything else. It's a matter of trust, consent, setting healthy boundaries and constantly reassuring each other about their feelings.

3) You'll always have enough people to play board games. 4) Although having many opinions can lead to bigger arguments, there are also more points of view of the world to explore, more ideas and solutions to said arguments, more ways to create synergy and grow as people by learning about each other!! Yes, you can also do this with the right group of friends, but isn't polycules supposed to be like friends who love each other romantically? Is it that too much of an asexual perspective of this topic?

At least I see it that way.

Of course these positive aspects are just my assumptions since I'm not even sure I am polyamorous myself, neither have I ever been in one (gosh, the probability of finding not just one, but two people I trust and love romantically and also want me back is so low! It's not even about self-steem, I think they are low in general hjagsjs)

Shit, I don't wanna sound immature. I'm aware it takes a lot of effort and communication to maintain this lifestyle. Some people can't imagine themselves in one cuz they would get jealous, and that's okay. Some people don't feel like they could love more than one person at once, and that's okay. Some people just think it's weird and prefer to stick to monogamy, and THAT IS OKAY. In fact, most people feel that way and there's nothing wrong with it; that's the whole point of this post. But it baffles me that I'm in the minority that can fathom a relationship of this type and be happy that it exists, happy that it's an option and remain open to the possibility.

Maybe it's due to the fact that I've exposed myself more to these kind of love in media out of curiosity, so I have a slightly better understanding of it? Or the complete opposite, am I just seeing the bright side of polyamory because I've never been in one and my knowledge comes from books, movies and other people's experiences on the internet? What if I'm insecure that my partner doesn't want me if I don't have sex with them, so by having multiple partners, in my head, everyone's needs are satisfied? Deep down, would I feel left out? Am I being greedy for considering it? I'm not sure.

Honestly, I just feel like my heart is big enough to love multiple people, and that doesn't mean that one's not enough. It means that there's a possibility to expand this great thing that's traditionally shared between two people, and make it even better. So, if I found the right partners I would give it a try, y'know?

...when did this turn into me pscyhoanalizing myself?

#mochi rant #polyamory #lgbtq #polyamorous #polyam relationship #open relationship #I need a higher being to come down and give everyone a little receipt with their sexuality so I can finally stop having a crisis #that would be funny actually #imagine you get percentages and everything lol #I have only one friend who agrees with me on this and she's really chill with everything maybe it's a personality thing #asexual #ace spec

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youwantedavillain · 1 year

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Lol she Dmed me! Let's Analyze it! (Part 3)

Now in part three, I will put my responses to her along with her own. So, let's continue our little journey~

When someone is under scrutiny, they tend to act paranoid or try to catch you and change the topic, so when she asks for me to clarify where I got the info of her SEXUALLY ROLEPLAYING WITH A CHILD, she was trying to discredit me or see what I had on her.

I in turn actively quote her about these:

It's noted that the majority of Colleges and Universities in the United States, especially here in the state of New Mexico -- where she and I live; yes, we know each other in real life and even live in the same town -- do not offer Therapists, they instead offer Counselors which are free on campus which usually offer 6 consultations and only offer temporary solutions. You can't even work with them long enough for them to offer permanent solutions. Therapists are not offered due to further expenses thus she would have to look somewhere else for one. But Counselors are not there on the campuses for the psychological welfare of the students, rather they are there for indecisive students who don't know what classes they want to take.

So, IF she tried to get help for her issues she didn't do so in the right way and even if she actually got some help she still went to her old habits as seen in her statement about August of 2021 and her interactions with "Asriel" because she admits to lashing out at him and others and pushing blame onto him. So regardless, she made the ACTIVE CHOICE to continue her bad behavior. She knows her actions are wrong, but she doesn't care. She puts herself in the position to do these things and not caring about the people she hurts.

This makes the statement about how she wishes to change her behavior for the better moot. It's completely negated because it's obvious by the contradictions of her going to "therapy". Even if one can say she has tried, obviously she hasn't tried enough, those who know what they are doing is wrong and actually want to change will do whatever it takes to get to a therapist and take their therapist's words to heart and implement the necessary actions it takes to change.

I then quote her about her points about myself. Which read as follows:

She actively admits that there were communication issues and slander but doesn't say WHY. I pointed this out in Part 2 where I go into depth about how she talked shit behind my back, and even how the Server Admin @trainerreva actively threatened me over a small mishap of me being clueless about a roleplay being paused.

Oh, wait... did I forget to mention Reva was a Server Admin. Did I also forget to mention that @felicitythekittycat was an Admin as well? Well, they are! She used her title and control over the server to manipulate people against me by slandering me in another server as shown in Part 2. This also doesn't even go into the fact that she encouraged people to try to manipulate me. Yes, she tried to manipulate Reva into getting me to admit something false about myself. Yes, they did that, if you go ahead and click this link to my drive (because Tumblr is limiting the number of pictures/screenshots I can have on a post) and go and read the screenshots 8-17 you will see what I mean.

The way Reva is talking in that moment is quite odd. He is asking me very personal questions and is completely dismissive of all the things I am saying, especially when it comes to my trauma. It is very much like he is having two conversations at once. Almost as if someone was in a Voice Call with him and directing him on what to ask me and what to say. He is very much unspecific most of the time as well as selective with what he does acknowledge and responds to.

Case in point when he asks me my age and I state that at the time I was 22 going on 23 he then says and I quote "4 years isn't that bad" completely ignoring the fact that I am a VICTIM OF PEDOPHILIA AND HAVE STATED MULTIPLE TIMES THAT AGE IS VERY MUCH IMPORTANT TO ME. It's as though he is trying to get me to say that I'd date her when I very much shouldn't and wouldn't do it even if it would KILL ME.

Tier is a manipulator and Reva allowed her to slander me considering that they both used the same vent channel in the same server that I had no clue about. Though this will be brought up in a later post.

Tier claims she doesn't remember much of what she did to me or much of the slander she has done, but this only confirms a topic about abusers and bullies. They do not care about the people they hurt or the actions they take doing so, only the joy that they get from doing it. There are also cases of Selective Memory or even Selective Amnesia. Though I am putting my money on Selective Memory. Either way, it shows that Tier doesn't consider what she did to me all that important to remember only the emotions she got from doing them. My suffering was the only thing she wanted, nothing more. But don't worry. Soon we will remind her.

#tw: manipulation #tw: abuse #hypocracy #bullet dodging #ulterior motives #Part 3 #Someone kill me I'm fucking tired.#Can someone find me the other victims #I beg you.#plz

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bombdodger7 · 2 years

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What happened? Where the hell am I? This can't be the same reality or world that I was born into. Not the one where people mostly meant what they said, there was hope for the future of humanity and I could get a damn good quality burger for less than an hours wage!

We had our problems. I mean, we had some pretty bad ones. Racism, sexism, homophobia, violence, lack of mental health care, intolerance, dangerous and shoddy work out equipment and those God-awful parachute pants everyone had to sport around the arcade after MC Hammer and Vanilla Ice made them popular! Ok, those were pretty bad problems in any scenario, but we still have the same ones that are arguably worse in the modern era, plus a plethora of more new-age walls to bang our heads against. What can a fella or a lady do? Well, most have resorted to adhering to the status quo, not realizing that while they binged Netflix and gorged themselves on junk food, they were becoming sheep, and I'm not referring to the good, Jesus-y kind. They are all too ready to trade in the freedoms we once would have charged into battle for, for the security of having electricity and affordable insurance.

Im not a religious man by any stretch, but I do believe in God. I guess I qualify as being called a Christian, but I abhor the term because the image and thoughts that come to mind when the average person thinks of what a Christian is. The vast majority of so-called christians are the most judgemental, abrasive, hateful and non-tipping bunch to grace the seats of the local Shoneys Buffet come Sunday after mornings service. All that said, God must be putting his hand on his forehead wondering why the heck he promised not to flood the earth and kill every man down here again.

As a whole and as a species, we have taken our world and our values and handed them to the devil, and said " I'd like to buy more clout and more likes on my Facebook, Instagram, Tik-Tok and Twitter accounts please!".

I know, I know....how dare me say these things and judge people like this, right? I absolutely do not. Woe is you, yes, but WOEEEE is me! I am just as guilty of anything I talk about as the next guy. I don't want to condemn any person or highlight any sin above my own. I only want to share the solution and highlight some of the dangerous and secretive goings-on happening around us and orchestrated by shadowy figures and principalities that control is subconsciously and subliminally, so that we willingly conform to the plans they have for us and so that we don't raise too much of a fuss and cause attention to focus in they're direction.

In closing, I'll state the answer to all of mankind's problems, simple as it may sound, but oh-so-hard to implement into a stubborn society. Ready for it? Here it comes!!!.....LOVE! Yep, the one four letter word that probably isn't used as much as the other ones in that group. Love, yes love ladies and gentleman. Just love. When asked, Jesus chose love as the greatest two commandments, saying that he who loves the Lord God with all his heart, spirit and soul, and he who loves his neighbor as himself has fulfilled and kept the law.

Think about it for a second. Reflect on this. Love forgives. Love sees past color, creed, orientation, sex, beauty, wealth and diversity. Love causes enemies to become family. Love causes a mother to give her life for her children, love convinces a man to fight evil and protect his family. Love doesn't judge. Love wants the person doing the most wrong to someone, to be the one who gets the most understanding and reflection, so that they may see the problems that hate causes themselves, they're enemies and everyone else in the spiderweb like pattern of the lives of those involved.

Ever heard of breaking someone's heart in a good way? Let me explain. If a bone heals improperly, the physician must first re-break the bone to set it right for proper healing. The same goes with a hard heart or a confused or hurt person.

A bully isn't naturally a bully. He or she becomes that way or is made into such by different things such as past trauma, abuse, neglect or lack of proper nurturing. If someone loves without boundaries, even loving the bully who makes fun of them, there may not be an immediate effect, but after experience and understanding grows from that seed in the bully's heart later on down the road, it will break they're heart in two. Same goes for everything and any scenario.

If a good company loved everyone truly, could they knowingly include poisons in our food we consume daily? Could a politician lie to those he loves deeply? Could a judge sentence a black man to more time than his white counterpart for a crime based on circumstanial evidence? If everyone forgave everyone would wars even start? No.

And God never said your neighbor had to be a human either. Animals, plants, our planet as a whole. Those are all your neighbors. Jesus said "go and preach to every creature" when speaking to the apostles about the task laid out before them.

Just let that tidbit sit and sink in a little. Think about it honestly and earnestly until the next blog I butcher graces these internet halls. The next subject to be covered will be this - "ARE THERE 2 GODS IN THAT BIBLE? TOOTH FOR A TOOTH OR GRACE? IS THE BIBLE A HUGE TEST FOR SORTING AND DESCERNING A MANS HEART?

Thank you so much for reading my blog and it has been an honor to prepare this for you. I wish you well and send some extra-good vibes your way! See ya next time!

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acaixadonada · 1 month

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Day 17: Your best qualities

I wonder if I'm supposed to talk about many, or just pick one or two... anyways... It's interesting how we are used to focus only on owr flaws and it gets hard to even remember our qualities. We are taught not to think highly of ourselves, not to do the best for ourselves... for that's selfish. And of course: we don't want to be selfish (ironic)

So when you "talk a walk around the block", which means... live life and get to know yourself more you finally discover yourself. Your real self, not the one that you believed to be because people told you what you should be.

Talking about our qualities shouldn't be dificult but it is, specially for those lacking or still developing a higher self-esteem.

I recomend you to keep it simple, really start from scratch! List the things you admire about yourself the most! After getting to know yourself (it comes with time, and... living) you'll fill the paper with your qualities and making a list won't be so hard anymore. It won't hurt anymore. Besides, recognizing your qualities is good for your soul! And also for your self love ♥

Well.. I don't think being foccused is actually a quality, but despite my adhd, when I foccus on something I enjoy, something I like I'm laser foccused and nothing can get the ideia out of my head, and the foccus out of me.

I love seing people happy, and I sometimes play the fool (intentionally or not) to get them to smile. I hate seeing people upset about something. I know how sad and hard it is to live unhappy, so I wouldn't wish that to anyone.

I'm dedicated: When I'm doing something, wel.. haha, speacially what I like, I give my 100%. If I feel like I'm not going to put much effort and won't get a satisfactory result I turn down the task. I don't like mediocre results.

I love spreading love.

I'm a good listener, and advicer. Now... ask me if I follow any of that!? Well, I'm learning! I'm learning!

I enjoy learning new things

I'm not afraid to change and try something new. The ideia of settling in the same state of mind or... job, gives me the creeps! Sometimes we need to get the hell out of our comfort zones and change! If you're unhappy change! Never settle for comfortable. Comfortable doesn't give you growth.

I take full accountability for my mistakes. If I am a WOMANNNNN I honor my skirsts and pants and represent it by being responsible. If I'm courageous and vein enough to take credit for what I do right, I must be courageous and huble enough to take accountability for what I do wrong.

I'm honest and sincere

I'm not afraid to apologize when I'm wrong, and if I hurt someone. (Speacially with words. I'm sincere but sometimes it's too much and I know it)

I don't give a damn about being right. Those who start up a good fight for "the pleasure of being right" all the time, are the ones who are not willing to work for their relationships. It is dificult to live with someone who wants to be right: their ego matters a lot more than loosing someone they love. If a bump comes in the road, they don't care about finding a solution with you to solve the problem. All they care about is "whose fault for encountering the bump is" (and it's always "yours", even when it is not but they will blame you until the very end for the sake of their pride because instead of discussing to find a solution and get the relationship growing stronger, they want to win the discussion and be right, UGH Let this people GOOOO!)

For me, love matters a lot more than my ego. My ego can go f*** himself, I don't care about it anymore.

I'm determined.

I'm resilient.

I'm not humble yet, but I'm working through it.

I'm loyal. Believe it or not, I do and I take people's loyalty (or the lack of) very seriously.

I'm forgiving. (Too much I guess...)

I'm always willing to work the issues in my relationships because I believe in people's worth, to me they're always worth it; I don't give up easily on the people I love.

I'm not afraid to say I love you (to the people who matter to me anymore)

My family comes first no matter what (even with our nonstop-piling-up problems)

I'm a mama bear! Even to my own friends. I tend to treat people like I would treat my children (?) I DON'T KNOW WHY, But I usually "adopt" my friends as if they were my children, and I even argue with them sometimes because I don't want them to get into trouble, I don't want them to be stupid. Yes, mama bear! I'm a big fat mama bear. And I always get into trouble for that, but they love the mama bear in me anyways, because she's honest and loving LOL

I always make time to love my people. They matter to me.

Thissss issss ittttt

xx, Lou

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rachaelnpc · 3 months

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Today I donated money to a family who lost their mother to suicide.

Two weeks ago I babysat for a friend who went to a funeral for a friend that was shot in an altercation.

I had said hi to Elijah McCain on campus before, we must have had the same lunch breaks and frequented the same Panera.

I trained Shanann Watts when she moved job duties to take ER Calls. A quick class on how to expect emergency patients and document information from EMS calls. I remember struggling to say her name because of how it was spelt.

I remember the many frantic emails at work following the James Holmes shooting. Report anything suspicious, how his notebook of plans was lost on our campus mail room, how part of the campus was on lock down because there might be a bomb. Co-workers frazzled because they had teen kids that were at the theater but thankfully seeing a different film.

The lock down at the small clinic across from the STEM school in Highlands Ranch where Kendrick Castillo, age 10, saved his classmates. It was during a go-live. We couldn't leave the building.

The 911 call I made twice for a homeless mad passed out in a parking lot. They never came. He woke up, gave him water and helped him into the shade.

The CPS call I made because the kids didn't feel safe alone with their father and their mother could only see the father's pain scewing her view. Nothing could be done. This was the 5th CPS call, multiple police calls for domestic abuse concerns, over seven DUIs, attempted murder ruled self defence, dropped charges for threating a cop...

The FBI call I made after witnessing a man who owned at least 3 AR-15s drunk, high on cocaine yell angerly at a news report of yet another mass shooting, 'That is the way to go out, leaving a statement. Fuck 'em all.' I also shared their violent history. Yet nothing was done and they continue to purchase firearms to this day.

I saw a father and mother slap thier infant child at an Old Chicago. I wanted to call. And say what? I don't know them or their names. The person I was with told me I think I'm high and mighty all the time. How I can do no wrong. Knowing if I said something I'll have my own night to deal with.

I get my dream job at 23. Well the job I've had my eye on since I was 19. The man I beat out for the job? In his 30s. He killed himself a week later. What if he got the job instead? Would he have met someone? Finally got that pep in their step? I took it only to be in my mid 30s, now floundering. Pissing away his lost opportunity that caused him his life.

At 19 I moved states against my parents' wishes, cut off. The boy that moved into my dorm room I just moved out of... hung himself in the closet.

I was almost killed at age 20 by having my head repeatedly smashed into the floor. I had slight bleeding and a headache. I only lossed consciousness for a few moments.

A family friend sent me a video of a women moaning while getting her butt tattooed. I stopped talking to them. I told my parents how uncomfortable it made me. They told me I was overreacting. He sent me the song, 'Just the two of us' He was like an uncle to me...

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!

There is so much darkness all around me. I'm Drowning. I stay inside. I am careful who I let in. I long to let more in. I want to find a partner. I now find it a silly notion. It is all part of it, this 'American Dream'. What is the dream really? What is it costing others? The homeless, the ones stuck. I want to help lift them up. The ones way up there don't seem to notice. As I was heading up, I too got stuck. My platform wasn't broken. Someone was sabatoging it. I don't know anymore what I'm supposed to do. I don't want to be up there. I never really did.

I just want to be happy and respected.

I'm too sensitive, dramatic, reactive, playing the victim, negitive, copy, smile more, too opinionated... I'm too much!

I don't think I'm the problem. I am looking for solutions. I cannot ignore issues while pretending life is great. I'm going to put my energy into finding answers on how to make it better. The haters way isn't working. Let the haters hate. They say I do, I'm anti-American, brianwashed... hello?!?!? Step out of your gated illusion.

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craycraybluejay · 2 years

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I can be very playful and creative :)

*sends partner a pic of two axes, one with a pink bowtie*

YES YES YES the ideal partner is someone intelligent who can match me line for line and reply to everything I throw at them.

I'm not generally afraid of romantic rejection as I am of other rejections, maybe because I'm not usually a very romantic person. I only get afraid if I had a previously established working relationship of a different kind with this person that may get messed up due to a romantic confession. But it is true I don't like emotionally delicate situations. They're uncomfortable and in cases where it makes sense to, I avoid them.

I do take my relationships seriously if and when I meet someone I really connect with. Though my emotions do tend to mess up and I've noticed that at the first sign of danger my emotions shut down around a romantic interest and I haven't yet found a way to get them fully working again.

I am direct and honest, always. Not just with the people I date but with everyone (unless they cannot handle honesty and will actively hurt me if they can't handle it... I avoid these types as much as possible). I do not usually filter my opinions and I do in fact encourage people, partners and otherwise, to be frank with me. And yes, being upfront IS NOT rude. I absolutely hate when people refer to my honesty as rude. What's rude is lying and saying something and meaning something else. It is extremely important to be as upfront as possible and avoid misunderstandings. Though neurotypicals seem to misunderstand me when I'm being upfront too so there's no winning with them. I have no desire to school myself for people. If you can't handle honesty you can fuck right off.

Special romance things are usually pretty unimportant to me. I enjoy the everyday, just spending time with a person I love is nice. Of course, I can appreciate special effort put into something special. But I do have some triggers with big events so it can backfire. And yeah, I do struggle with my partner's needs sometimes. I don't always know how to provide certain things and sometimes my logic and emotions aren't working together and I don't want to do the right thing on logic alone because then it will feel false and not genuine.

And yeah it takes me a lot of work to express affection in ways that I don't necessarily do so naturally. I can express affection in my ways great but other ways; not so much. I try very hard. It's one of the things I'm particularly bad at.

Yepp, there's the shutdown. Emotional disagreements, that's a small shut down, that I can recover from. Betrayal or abandonment? I can promise I will never recover from it. I can try hard for a long time but truth is I'm probably never going to get over it. I won't really feel things for that person any more, other than really muted feelings like annoyance, amusement, or sometimes a disconnected familiarity. And I do listen. But I also know when I'm right. As a bonus, I do know when I'm wrong, as well, and acknowledge it. And yeah ofc I offer logical solutions. Feelings I can still handle, sometimes, I'm not incapable. But feelings aren't going to fix whatever's wrong. Logic will. Telling you I feel sad is not going to fix my feeling sad, but telling you what you can do to make me less sad and vice versa will.

And again, realizing that feelings don't fix feelings isn't the same as ignoring their existence.

Again, I do talk about feelings. Just don't necessarily act like they're going to be fixing anything.

Ah so THAT'S why I'm mostly aromantic lmfao. Don't take me away from my mind pls I have Stockholm Syndrome for it <3.

I can be a good partner. But I don't know that I'm really in a good emotional state for it now, or ever. Like theoretically yeah. But when romance is the expectation instead of an "everythingship?" I dunno. Feels weird.

#mbti things #aromantic #greyromantic #intp t #intp #commentary

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livingalifeofasimp · 3 years

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☘️𝕲𝖊𝖓𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖓 𝕴𝖒𝖕𝖆𝖈𝖙

𝕴𝖓

🎀𝕴𝖘𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖎 𝕸𝖆𝖓𝖌𝖆🎀

You got teleported into a Novel called Love or Hate, where a villianess of an influencing family gets jealous of people around Crown Prince and tries to kill everyone especially his beloved and meets unfortunate death.

𝔽𝕠𝕣 𝕀𝕟𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕕𝕦𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟

𝕎𝕒𝕥𝕥𝕡𝕒𝕕 𝕒𝕔𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥

Click on the link for more information, If the link doesn't work then please be kind enough to inform me, Thank you💮💮💮

🖤 𝓩𝓱𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓵𝓲

*:･ﾟ♛ ﾟ･:* On getting into the novel as Villianess and not being able to go back to your world you decided to stop going down the path of original Novel Plot but make your own and live a life in luxury away from all the characters. Your first step was to break the engagement with Crown Prince, who was surprised when he heard you say that to him, you were just so in love with him and then after being unconscious for almost a week you decided to break off the engagement.

*:･ﾟ♛ ﾟ･:* Zhongli could not understand why you would do such thing and you knew he will fall in love with the Heroine when she appears, you told your father to annual it, since you understood that the affection holds no value in Crown Prince's eyes, but Zhongli wasn't able to digest this piece of information, when he tries to approach you, you run away, avoid him at any cost, he realizes how important you are to him, so he rejects your request to annual the engagement even after you nearly begged him and promises you that he will cherish you now on, leaving you thinking what went wrong.

*:･ﾟ♛ ﾟ･:* You sat with pen and paper tried to sort everything out, although Crown Prince was trying to win your favor back by sending you gifts, letters and asks for your audience only to get ghosted by you, getting involved with him will give you nothing but a miserable fate, no matter how handsome the Characters are you refused to acknowledge them any further. Now it felt like Zhongli clingys to you more than anything.

💛𝓐𝓮𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻

ﾟ･:*༻*:･ﾟWhen your carriage stopped infront of your state you saw Aether was there waiting for you, he told you that he heard you were trying to annual the engagement, for a minute you forgot how fast news spread in this era, Aether had a happy glow on his face, he told you that you deserve better. At some point you knew that Aether grows distant from Villianess in Novel Plot but the case here was totally different now he invites you or comes to you uninvited.

ﾟ･:*༻*:･ﾟYou don't stop him tho, he became your bestfriend, he taught you horse riding, sword fighting and helped you in all those things you were interested in. Thanks to Aether your bad dancing got better, you always wondered how he never go tired dancing with you, when you step on his foot unintentionally during practices. Physical touches increases slightly, you don't doubt it since it's normal for friends to hug a second more right?

❤️𝓓𝓲𝓵𝓾𝓬

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ Since there was nothing better to do, you started to put your hands on family business and was sent to pay visit to the business partner. To your surprise when you saw Diluc, he looked just like the Novel described him to be, stern, stoic and cold. His presence was intimidating but you had to win this opportunity so you confidently placed your views even when your legs were shaking under the gown you were wearing, you put your hands together and pursued him.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ Diluc seemed so lonely, he had no one to worry about him, just him and his thoughts. So you decided to greet him with smile and ask about if he ate his meals properly because he skipped them for one or two days due to his loads of work, which was bad for his health, if he needed to fight with Crown Prince for Heroine then he should be healthy, so you took care of him while you were staying in his Mansion.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ At first he was wary of you but he eventually warmed up and when Diluc laughed in one of your jokes, you felt grateful to witness that because no one saw him smiling other than Heroine, he looked really beautiful. He said you were way too different than what the rumours described you to be, you were perfect.

💚𝓧𝓲𝓪𝓸

✥ ۪۪۫۫◃ ✤◃ ۪۪۫۫✥ Bandits attached your Carriage, it was difficult to defeat them but with your escort and Aether's sword fighting training it became quite easy, even though you are not much of a sword fighter than Aether but you could protect yourself for once. When Crown Prince heard you were attacked he immediately assigned you his Loyal Knight who later becomes Imperial Knight respected by citizens, to which you obviously rejected but as persistent as he is you were made to accept the Knight for the time being since all the knights in your family are either afraid of you or not want to serve you and you had no fetish with working with someone who is not willing to be with you.

✥ ۪۪۫۫◃ ✤◃ ۪۪۫۫✥Xiao was very quite and skilled Knight so he was very attentive to your needs, and once caughted you, when you tripped on your gown while climbing staircase, due to which he got on his one knees and asked for your forgiveness. It left you speechless why would he do such thing? Ask for punishment instead of a thanks for saving your bones, you couldn't help but ask him, Xiao's answer made you clutch your fingers, he thought you, a noble lady would get disgusted by his touch since he is lowly born.

✥ ۪۪۫۫◃ ✤◃ ۪۪۫۫✥ You asked him to stand, Xiao is your favorite character who suffered so much and was never able to voice his love for Heroine, you holded his hands in yours, ignoring his body flinching and told him how he should not look down on himself, he is equal, everyone is equal since you all are humans and that you cherish him, he put his life to protect you. You said him all those things you wanted to when you read the Novel, not everything really but it left him blushing while you laughed walking ahead of him what a tsundere.

💙𝓚𝓪𝓮𝔂𝓪

☽༓✮･*˚ A handsome Mage Master kept on disturbing you, the smug looking guy who you meet in Local bars when you were out exploring about the Novel world, he helped you with your case to find out the solution to obtain the land for the project with Duke while giving you many riddles that exhausted you but seeing a worried Xiao was worth it when he says I don't care after nagging you for hours.

☽༓✮･*˚ You doubted if this guy was the one of the Male Leads who was owner of Mage tower because he was exceptional handsome, for a side Character to be so good looking is quite rare, but he debuted after the Grand ball so it couldn't be him, you debated. In Original Novel Plot they never described how he looked, but it was for sure he was popular among ladies. The guy introduced himself as Kaeya, who sometimes requests your presence in Mage tower, only VIP guest were allowed and when you asked him how he managed to get the permission he says it is one of his ways, suspicious enough.

☽༓✮･*˚ You eventually spend more time with him than required which sometimes anger Aether since your time with him reduced, of course you haven't told anything about him to anyone. To save himself, he once introduced you to the group of women flirting with him as his girlfriend. Kaeya sends his familiar in butterfly form for the most stupidest message through your window to which you react differently depending on your mood.

"How are you my Lady?"

"Am I allowed to miss you?"

"When will you visit me?"

"Have you been using me all this time?, I am heart broken T_T Heal me!"

🧡𝓒𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓭𝓮

❀⑅*⋆༶⋆❀⑅* Strong hand holded you securely, as you danced with him, who was wearing black laced mask in Masquerade ball organized by King for a yearly festival which you were forced you to attend by your Father and Crown Prince. One of the guys asked for you to dance with him, as per tradition one cannot reject the another requesting party, otherwise you would have been eating the food served for guests, imperial food is on another level, Zhongli sometimes tries to lure you to spend time with him by making such excuses.

❀⑅*⋆༶⋆❀⑅* The stranger pulled you even more closer saying that you are looking much more prettier than before, your first meeting but you did not recognized him or so you thought, and he told you that you are known as the most beautiful woman in the Kingdom, neighboring Kingdoms takes interest in you. You do remember the guy who helped you in fighting with Bandits both of them have the same hair color and playfulness in their voice.

❀⑅*⋆༶⋆❀⑅* When you asked him about it, if he was the guy from before to which he replied maybe, leaving you in the middle of the dance and bended in the crowd, Mysterious as Childe you thought, whoever he was, you hoped for him to not bring more problems than you already have. A groaning voice of Crown Prince from behind made you turn around questioning you why you danced with other guys than your fiance, you never thought a composed man as Zhongli would whine to you for such a small thing.

#genshin impact #yandere genshin impact #yandere x reader #yandere #tumblr #tumblrfeed #yandere story #genshin impact diluc #genshin impact zhongli #genshin impact childe #genshin impact kaeya #genshin impact xiao #genshin impact aether #yandere zhongli x reader #yandere diluc x reader #yandere aether x reader #yandere xiao x reader #yandere childe x reader #yandere kaeya x reader

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peppermintsparker · 2 years

Text

with the wildflowers | n.fowler

summary in which you marry the love of your life in a field of wildflowers.

warnings um...fluff? mentions cheating, mentions of illness and hospitals, nick fowler is a warning.

authors note not the gif i had in mind for this fic but i'm just eh. gif also not mine! fem!reader in this, however i am more than willing to do a gn!reader version too<3

"I'm on lunch right now, please make this quick." you grumbled down the phone, stabbing your fork into your salad.

You listened as your mother vented about the petty book club drama -- according to her, Barbara found out Carolyn had been having an affair with her husband. "Mom, just tell Barbara to divorce her husband, if she's really not happy with him it's the best option."

You didn't look up at the sound of someone opening your office door, too focused on the sound of your mom talking. You were grateful that the two of you communicated, even after you moved out of the state you had practically grown up in, but sometimes the constant communication could be exhausting.

"Well, if that's not the solution, suggest the two of them attend couples therapy together. I've got to go though mom, I'll text you later."

You locked your phone, placing it face down on your desk before throwing your head back and sighing in frustration. A familiar chuckle made you look up, and you smiled softly at the sight of your boyfriend of five years leaning against the door frame.

"Hi mi amor," Nick's voice was smooth, and he crossed the office with such determined footsteps that you wondered if he was hiding something. "Your boss has gone out for lunch, we'll be long gone by the time he's back. Let's go."

Part of you wanted to question him, but an even bigger part of you wanted to just go along with his words, and so you did. You kicked off your Louboutin's, carrying them in your hand as you ran from the office building and into Nick's car. "Where are we going?" you finally questioned, but Nick didn't answer straight away.

Nick pulled over six hours into the drive, next to a field of wildflowers where an unfamiliar car was waiting for the two of you. "Don't worry, baby. He's safe, you'll like this surprise I promise." the man reassured you, and the two of you climbed out the car and met with the mystery owners of the other car.

You almost cried, seeing the priest step out of the vehicle, and you knew what Nick had planned making you grateful for the cute blue summer dress you had been wearing. "If I could go back to the moment I first knew you were the one I wanted to be my forever, I would have taken a photograph of the two of us. Even though I was dehydrated, and in a hospital bed, you still made me feel like the most beautiful woman on the planet. You make me feel beautiful every single day."

You paused to wipe a tear away, "everyone told me that I was wrong for getting into a relationship with you. They told me that I'd only get hurt, and you couldn't be trusted, and I wish I could tell them how wrong they was. They didn't see the man who holds my hair back when I'm sick, or who holds my hand when I'm scared, or comforts me when I cry even if it's over nothing. They don't see the Nick Fowler I love."

You listened as Nick spoke his vows, and when he slid the gold ring onto your finger, you knew that this was forever. "I now pronounce you husband, and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”

That kiss felt like the first kiss. As you pulled away, Nick wiped your tears away, and you knew by the mischievous glint in his eyes that the adventure wasn't over yet. So hand in hand, the two of you ran back to the car where you drove into the sunset. "This is our adventure, Y/n. You are my forever. So, where do you want to go."

You just smiled, looking at your now-husband. "Anywhere as long as I'm with you."

"If I know what love is, it's because of you." -- Hermann Hesse.

#nick fowler #nick fowler x fem!reader #nick fowler the 355 #nick fowler x feminine!reader #peach writes

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fieldbears · 3 years

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It seems like you know a lot about skin care. I'm 28 now and honestly dont really bother with it (except to take off make up and using sunscreen). I'm 28 now and feel like my skin's fine but wonder if there's stuff it actually needs. With skincare being such a huge industry it's hard to understand what ingredients skin actually needs bc I feel companies (& influencers) try to sell you a lot of shit you don't need and maybe even makes your skin worse. Any tips where to start? Thank u

Hey friend! I love helping newbies. I absolutely do have tips. And a two-product two-step regimen. You can get it for under $40 and it should last you 6 months or more.

First off, there is ABSOLUTELY a ton of shit you don’t need. That is a good instinct. You can always pay more for a product and you can always add more steps to your routine, but that doesn’t mean that you’re actually getting more out of it. The first thing you should ask yourself is, what do you want out of your skincare?

SUNSCREEN: For someone who isn’t sure what they want or what they should do, my first question is how much time you spend in the sun. The one thing you can do to really permanently damage your skin is to spend a lot of time in the sun without any sunscreen. Basically: blah blah rays of sun blah blah destroys the collagen, aka squishy bouncy bonds between cells, blah blah, destroyed collagen means the skin sags more, meaning wrinkles.

(It is also, I hope I don’t need to say, dangerous for Cancer Reasons to get a ton of non-screened sun exposure. But I’m assuming that’s a given here.)

Like I said in the last post, southeast Asian sunscreen options are a huge improvement on what you find on the shelves here in the States because they have more stringent laws on what chemicals are okay to put in a product. But if you stick with what you can grab at CVS, that’s fine too - just make sure you google the brand and type and make sure the SPF is for real. (Some products marketed at, say, SPF 45 are actually proven to only be SPF 15. It’s like the olive oil bullshit all over again!)

There are also a lot of moisturizers available with SPF protection in them.

WHICH LEADS ME TO MY AMAZING TWO-STEP SYSTEMMMMM...

CLEANSE AND MOISTURIZE: There are seven-step processes out there, but what you really need to start with, and will get a ton out of if you aren’t doing anything right now, is cleansing and moisturizing.

The science explanation for doing this: blah blah your skin generates oils from your pores in order to create a protective barrier between your flesh and the elements, but said oils can get gunky once they’ve accumulated all the particulates from the air, and there can even be backups and miscommunications and over-oilage if you have dead skin cells sitting on top of your new skin, or stuff gets all the way into your pores, blocking the system, causing breakouts. So skincare is about removing everything on top of your skin, maybe adding fancy stuff in the middle, but absolutely creating a new barrier for your skin at the end, to replace the one you took off. I liken it to varnish on a painting - it’s meant to sit on top, collect all the dust, and get removed and replaced over time. But don’t just wash your face every 20-80 years. The metaphor only goes so far. Anyway.

Here is how to get into my absolutely bare minimum regimen:

PICK A CLEANSER: If you wear/remove makeup a lot, and/or have a very oily complexion, pick an oil-based cleanser. Oil-based means it’s good at removing makeuppy things and your natural oil. Otherwise, pick a water-based cleanser. CeraVe cleansers are available at Walgreens and they are affordable. It is available, affordable, clinically gentle on various skin types, and by god, it does indeed wash all the shit off your face.I have tried a lot of expensive water-based cleansers and I still come back to this one. That $16 pump bottle will last you a long time, too.

PICK A MOISTURIZER: I’m back on my CeraVe shit here because if you’re overwhelmed and don’t know what to pick, I’m gonna push you to the easy-to-pay-for, easy-to-find product that won’t make you break out. And it’s got SPF! If you want to get fancier, check out some options here. I currently use Laneige moisturizers, which are at Sephora and... other places. Idk. (And to repeat my last post: if you can’t stand having things sitting on your skin, even a moisturizer that will absorb over a minute or so, Laneige Cream Skin Toner & Moisturizer essentially feels like water.)

SHOWER STEP: You have both your products. Now. Put your cleanser in your shower. When you shower, use it to wash your face. In the shower, you can splash and splash to your heart’s content. Get your neck, your cleavage, any extra places you feel have an oiliness problem. But remember them for later, because you want to moisturize all spots you cleansed. (Also, if you’ve been using soap or anything else to wash your face up until now... stop that. Cleanser is much better.)

AFTER SHOWER STEP: Dry off and pat on that moisturizer. Make sure you apply it with clean hands. Rub it in gently and make sure all cleansed areas are now moisturized.

That’s it.

No, really, that’s my advice for beginners. Two products, one done in the shower. You have to do them in order. That’s it.

If you have the spoons to do this routine twice a day, around when you get up and right before bed, you’ll get even better results. But if you’re just starting out and get anxious about new routines, don’t sweat it. Your face’s cells turn over every 30 days or so, so if you keep this up every day for about two weeks, you’ll start seeing improvements by then.

Bonus newb tips:

About once a week, use a COMPLETELY CLEAN terrycloth washcloth to apply your cleanser. Get your (gentle) scrub on. Mechanical exfoliation basically means you’re using a brush, a cloth, something physical to remove everything from your face, including things like dead skin, which gentle cleansing may not have gotten. Doing it too often isn’t helpful, as you can only build up so much stuff to remove over time, and scrubbing too hard or too frequently can lead to frightening your skin, causing redness. So once a week is likely plenty. If you like the battery-operated brushes, go for it, but they cost way more than the clean washcloth.

You will see options for chemical exfoliation too. If you identify as a newb, I don’t recommend this. Chemical exfoliations aren’t bad per se, but are one of the few skincare things that can be done wrong, and in a way that can really upset your skin. Washcloth!

Are you replacing your pillowcases on a regular basis? I try to do once a week but I probably end up with closer to two weeks. Nobody’s perfect. But remembering to do this is a very easy way to help your skin out.

If you get your cleanse-and-moisturize routine down pat, 2x a day, and you want the next step, look into toners. They help your skin absorb the moisturizer more efficiently... science reasons. The toner goes on before the moisturizer, but again, your skin should be dry before you start.

There are ampoules, essences, treatments, and other fancy names for... very specific shit. Basically, if you have a specific problem, especially in a specific area of your face, chances are there is a specific tiny expensive bottle you can integrate into the middle of your routine to help with that. But there is a lot of snake oil out there and I don’t want anybody buying these solutions if they aren’t already managing the daily wash-and-protect, because you’d be surprised how many things that can fix.

If you have problems with breakouts or other bad reactions to some skin products, do your best to only introduce one new product at a time. That way if you start having a reaction, you don’t have to guess what caused it.

No matter what is or isn’t going on with your skin, your worth is not affected one iota. Whether I have three pimples and incredible redness around my cheekbone and nose area, making me look like a character mug of a drunken sailor, or whether or my skin is the cool, poreless ivory of Grecian marble, I am still the exact same perfect bitch. And so are you.

#Anonymous #skincare

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