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daphnedauphinoise · 2 years

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A while back there were some tumblr discussions on the nuances/differences of discrimination between us vs the uk (and really everywhere else) and I really appreciated your takes/insights on it. As an American born-raised desi, would it be alright to ask what the experience is like in Britain? Also, is there a lot of difference being Afghani vs Indian vs Pakistani vs Nepali etc in how women are perceived in social or work spaces? I was considering studying/working abroad and wondered where my blind spots were, to make balanced and thoughtful choices. If you'd prefer a dm convo or this isn't an ask you're feeling then no worries. Much respect on individual space and privacy. Thanks for reading 💕 💕 (ps. how is LOLITA?!?!? anybody's favorite novel?!?! not acceptable/deeply troubling)

Hi hi

Obvi I haven't lived in America so I can't do a thorough unbiased report back but I can say that I have been exposed to enough variety of American media to get a grasp of what it is like there. So with that disclaimer in mind, let's rock and roll.

The Asian British Experience is something different to the American experience. Straight off the bat, the main difference in America the term Desi only includes Pakistani Indian and Bengali dispora whereas in the UK, Desi includes Nepal and Sri Lanka. There is a big more of the good old subcontinent togetherness here vs in America. If you are South Asian you are South Asian, there isn't any nitpicking.

The UK is tiny compared and when you look at just many South Asian we have compared to the general population, it is a lot a lot. Our culture is very integrated here in the UK. You average Brit knows a decent bit about South Asia and South Asian culture/history. South Asians are regarded the model minority. We aren't going to go into the whole model minority minority myth thing here but I am not going to lie, it does work in our favour. For example, schools here work on catchment or exam sitting. And back when I lived in England there was a huge problem of South Asian students being picked over Black students to be in certain better schools. As a south asian, along with other Asians we were definitely treated different to other poc in terms of the ease of which subjects we were allowed to pick, who got sent to competitions simply because we are Asians.

Do we have colourism and racism within the South Asian society?

Ye lol. But like I always say the UK, unlike America has the problem of classim. So rich south asian treat poorer south asian far worse than I have seen white people treat south asians.

North Indians, here, have a bad rep for being rude to other south asians which is something every Desi will agree on lol

Colourism is slightly tricky. That will take more explanation.

Working as a Desi in the UK?

All south asians get lumped as one. This isn't necessarily because people just see us as one ( which people do but we are all neighbours and it isnt wrong to say our cultures are similar). Again the model minority thing comes to play and we have those advantages over other poc.

I cant speak too much on work life because I havent had a office job yet but I did have ask my sisters And this is what she said.

'When people find out you are South Asian, there is an automatic pressure of being perceived as highly skilled. You are expected to the best at your job and mistakes are frowned upon because you are south asian, you are smart'

I am still waiting for a response from my other sister who arguably has a better insight because she has worked at a top job in one of the biggest companies.

Off topic but my other sister from another mister pointed out that as a highly educated South Asian women, dating becomes incredibly harder. Your dating pool gets smaller and people become more intimated by you.

I could go on and on about being South Asian in the UK. Being British South Asian vs being a FOB South Asian. The expectations. Our impact on culture here.

But the UK is a brilliant place for South Asians. We have enough of our own people for you here lol. No but genuinely, all it will take for you to settle well here is to make friends with one South Asian and the rest will come easy. There is mutual rule of 'support other south asians' that Desis follow here so you will be fine here. We have people in high places everywhere here so networking is easy peasy.

Feel free to dm me if you want i dont mind,

Much Love

Daphne

Edit : READ the comments.

My mutual @sweetsop has raised very good point there. I realised I didnt include the Hindu vs Muslim thing. Racism between Hindus and Muslims is most definitely a thing but in this day and age it is mostly just the older generation and FOB ( fresh of the boat aka immigrants ). My generation is quite good with the religious differences, like ten years ago Hindus and Muslims would not have been friends and there was so much shit between the two groups.

I should also add, it isn't sushine and rainbows here. You will experience racism here but that comes with being a minority anywhere. POC against POC racism is quite prominent. White people are racist here too but depending on where you live, its whatever. I have heard far worse from POC than from white people.

( I am also slightly tipsy rn so please pardon whatever this sporadic mess is )

#you ask for daphne's answer

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strawberrybabydog · 2 years

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haiii babydog!! i was wondering how you felt about this rentry??? https://rentry.co/IRLnotdelusional i wanted to know if it was wrong or harmful,,, etc!!!

they also had a carrd linked but i wasn’t sure if any of it was misinfo or harmful. sorry if this is against your asking rules and thank you!!

before i start, i just want to clarify that i dont really have an opinion on the word "irl" (as an identity) other than that its just really confusing and unnecessary. i only have a very slightly negative bias going into this.

i should also preface this post by saying that "irl" doesn't have an official coining that i, or anyone in any of my alterhuman circles can find or knows of. which is why we see people claiming it "is or isnt X," because nobody truly knows. the origins of this specific use of "irl" are most likely untraceable because we've been using "irl" as slang for over 10 years on the internet, and this alternate use came up within the last couple years

TLDR: 3/10. poor wording + a lot of commonly made mistake misinfos.

as usual, everything is under the cut, and no screenshots will be described because tumblr still won't give me the alt text editor

oh no... i really dont like this wording. "claim their delusions are real." eugh, it just. i really dont like it. most delusional people i've met on the internet double book keep enough that we recognize our delusions arent "real." at least, not to everyone, only to us. the way this is worded makes it seem like we're deliberately lying or trying to convince other people that we're correct, when this doesnt really happen. i know this is nit-picky and most likely not how they intended to word this, but thats how its worded and its just.. its not good it makes me feel gross.

so it's an unecessary re-branding of spiritual Otherkinity? also, psychosis can absolutely be spiritual. religious and spiritual delusions are very very much A Thing, as are religious and spiritual hallucinations

they talk about how psychosis isn't a disorder, it's an umbrella term for a bunch of symptoms, which is true. but they get the specific symptoms wrong though. the correct symptoms are hallucinations, delusions, catatonia, disorganized thoughts and speech (positive symptoms,) and negative or cognitive symptoms. social isolation and paranoia are not psychosis symptoms, but they can be related to psychosis in individuals. very accidental and small misinfo here, not deliberate at all

nit-picky again, but a lot of their wording about delusional people makes it seem like they really don't like delusional people which is sort of icky. they later confirm they themselves are psychotic so i really dont understand this attitude of "im better than other delusionals." the harm delusions cause isn't always apparent to the people living in them. while it's technically true that delusions must cause harm, we don't always know that. it's not black and white enough to say "if your delusions dont cause you harm you're not delusional" & be completely correct, so it's best not to say anything about it at all if you're not going to delve into nuance

there it is. i knew the Extremely Bad No Good part was coming... but i dont think i was fully prepared lol

canon divergent Fictionkinity isn't a symptom of delusion, holy shit. source much? most grandiose delusional people identifying as fictional characters actually aren't canon divergent at all anyways. infact, i'd say their identities are more stricly canon than non-delusional Fictionkin.

this type of delusion is not called a delusional misidentification. what the hell is up with these people and bastardizing DMS? it's. the wikipedia... it's generally easy to use google. if google isn't easy to use for you, you shouldnt be making educational carrds to begin with /gen. this type of delusion would be categorized as a bizarre/non-specified delusion, aka, miscellaneous. for the millionth time, delusional misidentification syndrome is an umbrella term which encompasses delusions that all follow a similar theme. delusional misidentification syndrome is not identifying as an anime character.

the bottom bit about recommendations for coping with difficult delusions isn't medical advice btw, so i'm not clocking it. it's more like self-help. whether or not its effective i dont know and i dont care, its not really important

yes! very cool. i agree with this. the acceptance and encouragement of delusions can make them worse or more difficult to treat in the future. acceptance should be viewed as a last resort in coping

this is the part thats so confusing to me. i've been saying "irl" (originally "in rl" btw) to mean "offline, real-life" for over 10 years. it's not "first an acronym for an identity." it just means in real life! it's not that deep! i really hope this specific usage for this term doesn't catch onto mainstream media ONLY because it's so fucking confusing

they close the whole carrd by saying that if you disagree with them its fine and blah blah blah

this is another nitpicky thing but a lot of the language they used is overly personable, which feels a little manipulative. like, i don't need your permission to disagree with you. you dont need to reassure me it's fine to disgaree with you. i dont need your approval, internet stranger. the overly personable language (through the whole carrd) makes me feel like they're trying to coerce me into something or convince me of something?

i dont think its intentional.. i think its just they way they talk - like im not accusing them of Literally Being Manipulative. but when you're writing educational carrds, it's best to leave Yourself out of it as much as you can. cuz now i feel untrusting about this carrd, which isn't what the author wants

#asks #not dog #misinformation

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night-dark-woods · 2 years

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YESSS another person out there who reads Mara Sov as autistic!

YES YES YES hope its ok i answer this publically if not not ill delete it as an ask and just post it BUT she is sooooo very much autistic to me like. i love her sooooo much and thats a huge huge part of it ESPECIALLY bc she gets to be SO delightfully complex and morally gray and a deeply sympathetic character who still is a bit of a horrible person sometimes which just ISNT something we GET a lot as autistic ppl like. augh!!! mara sov was constructed in a lab for me to care about.

anyway im not citing stuff bc im on mobile and copypasting to the tumblr app is Hell but i have fully read the marasenna like 4 times in the last 2 months so this is going to be rambly as all hell but:

-talk about fucking black and white morality. going back to earth is the Right Thing To Do and she will absolutely condemn* her entire colony ship to mortality for that.

-her conviction that she knows secrets and things no one else knows, that she is always in control in a way others arent, and her Need for that to be true, and her sense of herself as separate/better/other/above the rest and having a connection to a deeper knowledge. i feel like theory of mind gets tossed around as a dsm checkbox without people like. fully understanding the nuances of it.

-relatedly her... mercenary? approach to the social interactions and relationships she has (and her utter panic and confusion when she cannot use her models that she has, eg sjur). like she may not be able to Feel what other people feel but she can certainly pattern-match and manipulate.

-her absolutely oversized eldest daughter & gifted kid syndrome taken to absolutely absurd extremes (thanks osana and alis li!) bc of what authority figures told her to be true about herself at 19. (one of the times she had to dramatically readjust her model of How Social Interactions Work- the concept that how she is perceived is Her Responsibility which she immediately internalizes as Law). ALSO osana saying that mara never wanted to be her daughter like. ok we get it ur kid is strange and acts "older than her age" and is more self-possessed than a child her age should be except when shes not.

-god just. honestly everything about how shes written. idr if u have read seth dickinson's published books (the traitor baru cormorant) but baru from those books is SO SO SO similar like. ruthless in that the ends justify absolutely any means, self-centered, brilliant with a massive blindspot where it comes to emotions, manipulative bc she relies on a carefully constructed understanding of how social interactions work, most importantly disastrously world-shatteringly gay.

also i feel like part of it is that a lot of the traits and things that make me read mara as autistic are like... internal experience traits that arent easily recognizable by allistic ppl bc they dont Have a recognizably autistic-specific external manifestation and instead come off as like. being a bitch or selfish or stuck up or cold or Whatever. but are like immediately viscerally recognizable if u experience things the same way.

maybe at some point ill make an Actual Post abt mara sov, the travelers most autistic creature. but so much of it is Unexplainable Vibes. if u kno u kno. also thank u for sending this ask and giving me a chance to talk abt mara i love her SO much.

*i dont believe immortality is inherently good, so i dont think it was condemning is like, the right word, but in context of how characters see it.

#mara sov #asks #i am so so normal about mara come closer please i promise im normal about her.#im SO glad im not alone in reading her this way as well also!!!#long post

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klavery · 6 months

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ok ive alluded 2 this b4 and i wanted 2 talk abt it 4 ace week so if anyones just dying 2 get in on an internet strangers Dramatic Queer Backstory im ready to overshare. its about my history with sex negativity and how its affected me.

so i grew up with an lgbt+ irl friend group of about 7 years. it sounds totally fake but for the love of god just trust me on this. Friend A was your typical anti-aspec, anti-mogai, anti-kink exclusionist with internalized homophobia and Friend B was a sex repulsed asexual. these two people were my best friends, we were all nd, we all liked fandom stuff, and we all found out we were lgbt+ together.

now with that context in mind, im letting you know right now that our relationship with eachother as lgbt+ people was utter hell. we werent CONSTANTLY at eachothers throats, but there had always been an air of uneasiness any time any topics about our identities or lgbt "issues" were brought up. there was no solidarity, and any support for eachother had always been one-sided. when tolerance HAD failed us, it resulted in arguments and shade-throwing. and it was all fueled by tumblr funnieman internet discourse brain poison. i was unable to feel pride within the presence of these two people, and the damage this did to me as an aspec person alone is a post all on its own.

these two friends, as you can imagine, were also very sex negative people. as was i. for me it was from a weird mixture of repulsion, and repression. but the nuances of my mess of an identity is, again, an essay for another time. but anyways, my own issues combined with both Friend A's internalized homophobia and Friend B's repulsion lead to us being neck deep in a miserable cycle of both sex and kink shaming, of either people we knew or people on the internet, amongst ourselves (i guess this was the one thing we could all agree on. isnt that just swell). this had been disastrous for my self esteem as someone who, later realized, wasnt "as asexual" as they thought, for lack of a better phrase.

i cant begin to describe how psychologically damaged this behavior has left me. to be stuck in such a toxic, harmful mindset during such a crucial period of development, between the ages of 13-20 years old. that i still struggle immensely to unlearn. it feels permanently ingrained in my subconscious, its just completely automatic to react with disgust or anger towards anything sexual. i always thought myself to be the perverted freak of the group, because of what i only relatively recently realized was actually normal human behavior all along. but the guilt of simply having any sexual thought continues to eat me alive to this day. and i must reiterate, the shaming wasnt just from my friends. i take just as much responsibility for the harm i caused. and i dont doubt my old friends are also just as fucked up from it as i am. i dont want to blame them for what happened. there is a part of me that wants to be angry, but thats mostly at the exclusionist shit. which i, big shocker, also had a hand in as well. funny how that works. its just. sad it had to be this way. this month is the 4 year mark of when i finally stopped talking to them for good. and i can only hope theyve grown up and gotten better.

#hollyposts #vent #ace week #aaw #i could go on foreeever about this. but i actually wanted to keep it readable.#so storytime with holly will probably happen more often #considering turning off reblogs actually takes a lot of anxiety off my shoulders talking about it #i see posts that say aspecs should speak up more about their experiences. so ill try 2 internalize that.

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sleepymccoy · 3 years

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Hello! I wanted to ask you this bc I really admire your work and blog, and I get the sense that you're a person who can tackle nuance well (and I believe this topic deserves it). I've tried wording this as best as I could, and I'm sorry that it's very long.

I've started getting the impression that some parts of the Good Omens fanbase have been sort of contained, if that makes sense. I feel like small creators have a hard time getting attention to their work anymore. As if people are only looking at the same handful of established creators nowadays (and that those creators are only looking at one another). And by extension, content really only gets attention if it's liked/shared by certain people. And then on top of that, it really constricts a lot of topics in fic and art that get appreciated.

I know that the hype for Good Omens has died down in the past year and that explains a major dip in interest, but I still feel there's an imbalance. I see genuinely good work overlooked time and time again, and I worry that my own work has been looked over bc it simply hasn't been deemed a fan favorite. For a while it looked like there was an effort to boost smaller creators, but it's seems like it phased out pretty quickly. I will be honest, it's been a little discouraging. It feels like the Good Omens fanbase is a club a lot of us have been almost excluded from.

I wanted to know if I'm just imagining this whole scenario or if it's a thing others have noticed? If others have noticed, what can we do to spread some love?

I'm sorry if this came off the wrong way or like I'm scolding people. Or like I'm whinging like a needy child not getting enough attention. I'm curious and was wondering if it was worth asking someone else about. Thank you for reading! And thank you for responding if you do!

Hey! Thanks for all the compliments lol, that’s lovely of ya

I doubt i’ll be as succinct as you managed.

Overall, I agree. I don’t think you’re imagining things at all and I’ve certainly also noticed a decline in interest in my stuff since the start

This is a total theory, but I’m gonna put it forward cos it makes sense to me. When Good Omens started up everyone followed a load of people to get at the content and were reblogging and engaging all over the place. Spiderwebs of followers were formed. I think there are blogs who end up being more influential than others, it depends on what youre looking for in the fandom who that is for you, but there are always big sort of blogs that just reblog content to share it. I think they’re the things that change.

Cos what happens is interest wanes. Fans move on and go somewhere else. If you’re following and relying on a blog to show you lots of new art and they’re just not doing it any more, then you’re sort of left just seeing the popular stuff that gets cyclically reblogged.

For example, i was following, with notifications on, a blog that reblogged every bit of poc good omens fan art they came across. total mixed bag of quality, but it was fantastic and picked up blogs that were completely unknown to me. The person running it got tired and moved on, so i don’t have access to that any more. It’s a lost thread in my little spiderweb of access that cuts me off from so much and it’s a real loss

Alternatively, and this is the trap i fall into, you follow creators. Like what you said! So, when I see a post i like very much i go straight to OP and (after checking they’re not a terf or aphobic) i follow. This means i get new content from the source rather than relying on someone elses taste to have a chance of seeing it myself. However, it also means i’m not following many blogs that focus on reblogging a range of content, so i miss newcomers. I’m not ignoring newcomers, i simply don’t see them

Both approaches to who you follow come with the curse of as the fandom gets older, you don’t have a clear way to find new content or creators. There’s an early bird gets the worm element to it all

There’s also tumblr weird bad habit of not reblogging things. People who run personal blogs rather than themed blogs will like something and consider their work done, but that does nothing to help new art or new artists, cos it’s not permeated yet. That kills new content and content creators pretty thoroughly

So yeah, i think there’s a lot going on there, but you’re certainly not making it up and a lack of engagement on your posts isnt an indication that people don’t like it, it just means people haven’t seen it or have fallen for their habit of not reblogging things they really ought to share.

In terms of fixing this? That’s a toughie.

I don’t have a fix, but i agree the lethargy is tiresome. It’s a constant effort to get something to take off, i have to reblog stuff four or five times before it starts moving beyond my immediate sphere of influence. But it makes sense, there are less fans and the fans there are aren’t out looking for new people to follow.

but i don’t like ending on a negative, so i’ll talk about some options or ideas! even though i don’t have the kind of influence someone would need to be heard

In my perfect world (and i repeat this is my day dream, i do not pretend it is well thought out or fair for all) i would remove the like function; either reblog it or you don’t get to keep an access. I would see more blogs that reblog content to a theme. I would see blogs that search out new creators. I would see newsletters that name new creator blogs that have engaged recently. I would see blogs that make it a challenge to themselves to reblog art and fic that has less than 100 notes. I would see more low stress fan events, more prompt lists and less organised zines.

But that’s all a lot of work for individual people to take on (except the likes vs reblogs thing, but that a real personal dislike of mine). I’ve tried to take part, I run @goodomensevents which is a blog where i reblog any general community event on tumblr that doesn’t cost money to take part in. But i don’t really think it has much impact, cos i thought of it too late in the game and no one wants to follow new good omens blogs anymore.

which i understand. i’m happy with my dash, i don’t feel like it’s lacking. I love who i follow. my mutuals talk to me and aren’t cunts. And i have no idea how to find new creators even though i may want to.

But hey, if anyone’s running a blog like what i’ve described, please send me a link! Maybe i’ll make a rec list on good omens events lol, see what happens. I’ll definitely follow you

#sleepy speaks #long post #im so bad at remeembering to tag long post im very glad i remembered here #i added the bolds afterwards cos it was just a massive fucking wall of text otherwise whoops #Anonymous

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consciouschunkofmoss · 2 years

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Tumblr nonsense word fandom ask; caos and the expanse?

this caught me so off guard oh my god sjxnsxjhs but thanks sm !! 💕

- blorbo

lilith because well. its lilith ! her presence within the show may not be as apparent as we wished for, but the way that her portray comes across throughout the whole show is just. impeccable ! the most interesting character on the show for me, overall, so i am only bound to say how important she is to me <3

and chrisjen obviously, as she comes to be one of those characters that had everything and anything possible in her life, the knowledge and yet childish nature she carries pull at the strings of her being, opening up wounds to be treated in the most impulsive and non-caring ways again and again as the story is develops itself on further

- scrunkly

camina !! literally just. she deserves a hug, someone to tell her she matters, and also to get the fuck out of politics lmao

(i know this is the total opposite of the energy they try and envelope her around, but i cant stop myself from thinking about how much a change shes had since the first episode we met her on a main scene)

for caos im not really sure, but im definitely inclined to say either dorcas ?? for some reason ?? i think i just vibe with her

- scrimblo bimblo

MARY !! literally she is so underated and yet such a nuanced and complex character, and it makes me genuinely upset people dont seem to like her as much outside from our personal social circles. there is so much to be offered and explored, from the way at how certain detailed depictions were brought out by the very actress to the present potential that rested within her pre-existing version

* breaths in * i was about to talk about arjun but you know what ? the one who really, really deserved better ? miller's companion

just. he suddenly vanishes after season 1 which was a huge deal for me as the basis i was starting to build on the expanse came from him, so i was only bound to see how much of a waste cutting off that character was - the amounts of good narrative lost are honestly sad

- glup shitto

NANCY MY BELOVED i swear this woman has so much potential !! and yes technically she has her spotlight throughout the ring's arc, but i would be so so excited to see her on a more long-term situation

agatha definitely ! i mean, there was so much give throughout the show, so much to be developed within such a forgotten character

- poor little meow meow

i ?? dont have one for caos ??? because most of the "pathetic" characters are either redeemed already or pratically unredeemable ?? im sorry but this one i really cant answer for lmao

monica monica monica - this girl is just. the most controversial person within the show that i can think of, but you know what she still managed to steal my heart with how complex she is as well

(can i just say that miller was such an option here and i totally forgot)

- horse plinko

personally id like to put anderson dawes on a little jar and shake it very very hard, that man has no place in my heart

nick (yeah im not elaborating on that one, good luck)

- eeby deeby

marcos fucking inaros, i know from a chrisjen simp perspective id probably choose someone else that isnt as much of a centric villain, but honestly all i want for season 5 now is for him to get fucked <3

lucifer, obviously sxjshxs the guy didnt even deserve to be that much of a presence on the show tbh, besides from being an omnious and mysterious figure there was nothing else id want for him to be

#asks #mutual samara <3 #so ashamed of myself for not including bobbie on here smh #i could have put her on either caminas or nancys place but it felt way too superficial unfortunately #but please that in terms of the expanse faves shes in second <3 #also thanks for asking about caos !! literally i only spend time thinking about lilith and mary so having to. expand my horizons was #it was pretty cool honestly #(and i am so so sorry for taking so long on this lmao i had to go on a hunt for this ask post bc i dont tag anything properly apparently ~)#i #i just noticed how long this is oh my dear nature #long post

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strangestcase · 3 years

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The kink at Pride arguments r so fucking stupid like half of them is tumblr users wanting to be woke homophobic by dictating what gay men do in public and the other half is rude people who don’t fucking care if people are uncomfortable when they do puppy play in public (and using the argument to be aphobic SOMEHOW but you know how these people are).

Kink has always been a part of pride, it’s important not by virtue of kink being inherently queer (it isn’t) but by taking part in the community, but Jesus Christ, if you want to fuck in public there’s 18+ events for that and that’s perfectly fine. Kink has to be safe, sane, and consensual, and that includes other people consenting to seeing it. Like. this isnt even about children at pride or making it family friendly (which is at this point sinonimous with sanitized) it’s about basic sexual etiquette.

One thing is dumb people calling you a sexual deviant for the crime of wearing leather (sarcastic) and another is to get weird looks from minors when you’re getting steamy. Like it will happen, so don’t b surprised. (Also, a Lot of children at pride would benefit from adult guidance, just saying.) again. This isn’t about protecting kids inocence or some shit, that’s a bit of a fundie argument there— it’s about being fucking polite and knowing when YOUR limits clash with other people’s! use your brains 4 once please

Ah and by the way you all complain about kink n drag at pride as if drag queens were the worst thing to happen to humanity but then have no qualms with posting porn of kids tv shows in the main tags... like which is it 🤨 do u want to “”””protect children””””” or not

the arguments we should be having about pride should be about inclusion and getting cops and corporations off our dicks because corporate pride sucks but NO you gotta be either wanting to sanitize pride OR calling any person who is uncomfortable with that stuff *on a personal level* a Puritan (word that has lost all meaning ever since its become sinonimous with “person with a milder taste in porn than me”) without almost any middle ground. yall know nuance exists right.

Anyway. Kink belongs at Pride. But there’s special spaces to perform it if you’re worried about children or people who might be triggered and THAT’S OKAY AND VERY GOOD!! Next time don’t try to twist this conversation into idk scaring the evil aces with sex or policing those nasty faggots! Please!! you Have already turned pride into a music festival for cishets! just shut the fuck Up and listen to what other people have to say!!!!!! because who knows!!!!!!! They might make more educated arguments than u!!!!!!!!

#doc talks #rant #long post

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nafeary · 4 years

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“Therapy Session”

⚬ Pairing: No romantic pairing.

⚬ Characters: Dazai, Isaac (mentions of Arthur, MC, Leonardo, and Napoleon)

⚬ Word Count: ca. 2,5k

⚬ Warnings: mentions of anxiety/panic attacks

⚬ Genre: mostly angst, Confused Newt™️, fluffy ending

✧✎ Synopsis: Dazai refuses to open up. Isaac refuses to see people as humans instead of equations. Perhaps, the time was ripe for the residents to pull the strings behind the scene.

✧✎ A/N: @arsnovacadenza HERE IT IS!!! I haven’t written in ages, so after fending of good ‘ol writer’s block, it took a while to finish this. I hope that you will like this, sweets... I’m not usually self-conscious, but I’m just like 😣. ENJOY AND DRINK WATER!!! (I might change the mood board into a banner... I dunno man.) ALSO, pls tell me if the read more link isnt working... y’all know how bitchy tumblr is.

Dazai couldn’t remember much of his mundane life; nay, he preferred not to.

Most of this mortal coil had been spent in debauch; whoring around, neglecting his studies, committing attempt over attempt at ending his breath. He wrote it off as a tragedy, preferring to build the plots of his own stories rather that the one of his being.

Life is fleeting. For some it is akin to the joy of chasing butterflies, flower fields embedded in their sundry wings, fluttering away with no worries plaguing their minds.

For most, however, these nonchalant butterflies aren’t an omen of euphoria and felicity. They are the begetter of anguish as it sails beneath the wrong colours, maelstrom’s created by the fortune of others. Destructive. Noxious. A storm ready to destroy one’s entire motivation and spirit. Whether it be in form of capitalism or a simple shtick.

Life is unkind.

Thus, the author didn’t see the point to relieve any of his memories... but one particular scene kept his mind awake. It was fuzzy, fuming paper assaying to its destruction.

But what he could remember was a certain tale relayed to him as the moon reigned mighty, futon feather-like below his boyish body, and a tranquil voice would envelope his senses until all he could see was the palette surrounding him sponged into shadows.

He remembered the fable of a celestial guardian, a dragon so gentle it prefers flying as to not bring harm to a single organism of life. The birth of a human signified the birth of such dragon, a Kirin. It acts in protection of benignant households, as the unseen force guiding them back to morality. He was told his cousin’s birth foretold the creation of their guardian.

As a mere child, he believed these words. He believed that someone would shield him, serve as a warning sign for impending danger.

He believed someone would come to open the cage he had locked himself in. He believed someone would burn its cover, guiding him to long-lost light. He believed someone would teach him to take flight again.

He believed.

“Unlock the godforsaken door, you insolent fools!”

Sir Isaac Newton was annoyed. Horribly aggravated. Excruciatingly narked. And more so than usual. His ire had multiple fountains, one of these being these insolent fools that had chosen to bolt the room, muttering something akin to “therapy session”.

If he had to be plain, he expected such action from the frivolous author and his partner in crime (a young woman who had arrived a few months prior, the second humane addition to their otherwise monstrous community).

However, the physicist hadn’t expected Leonardo and Napoleon to agree to the couple’s notion.

Another cause fueling his irritation, like a mosquito buzzing to and fro and disregarding any clemency, was their reason for imprisoning him.

“You heard our condition, ‘ol boy,” the voice of the reformed Casanova reverberated. “Neither of you are leaving that room until you’ve talked. Thoroughly.”

That’s right. He wasn’t the only one.

His attention redirected to the owner of the lair they were currently stuck in, simpering away in his wonted manner. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that their predicament was the Japanese man’s fault.

Dazai Osamu was a pest. The neighborhood rascal ringing every door’s bell, pestering everyone’s existence with the sole motivation of garnering the final laugh. As of right now, he seemed to have succeeded in his mission.

“Are you satisfied now?” He couldn’t help the prominent sneer from forming. “If it wasn’t for your countless jests, we wouldn’t be here!”

Dazai spared him another nonchalant smile, moving to take a seat at the dark mahogany desk. “Do not fret, Ai-chan. They’ll open the door... eventually.”

A few hours had passed, and the warmth in Isaac’s chest, welted into disdain and anger, had mellowed his mind. Enough so as to admit that he might have been one of the causes of their situation, too. Frankly, it was due to the atmosphere Dazai’s room granted.

Soft and gossamer strands of alabaster light enlightened the room in a serene glow, aiding to the eminent scent of books. The smell was slightly musky, akin to aged paper, but a comfortingly nostalgic vellichor. Outside, a symphony created by Mother Nature herself resonated; tree branches rocked against each other urged by the gentle breeze as insouciant hummingbirds frolicked their sweet tunes.

It wasn’t his first time to share the author’s company in his room; on the contrary, the well of his silent animosity sprang forth from their last meeting (which had rendered him drunk on accident). Seldom at most, Isaac would traipse across a formula he just couldn’t solve, but Dazai was without compare.

He had barely asked for a sliver of information, the wish to befriend Dazai more genuine than ever. Alas, aiming to divert the topic, he had been fooled into a lull of folklore.

Hurt. It pained him to admit it, but Isaac was hurting.

With nothing else to occupy his mind, his eyes wandered to the fibster whose orbs told fables of the sun. Clad in purple, his hand was infallibly hidden beneath the fabric of his traditional (and knowing him, probably slovenly worn) garment, choosing to hide his cards just like everything else.

The empyrean galaxy of spotted crystals did not appear unlike the author; thus Isaac always found himself discovering their contrasts. He didn’t like the man, but he was a sight to behold, just like his beloved sky.

Dazai was ethereal, be it his fluid manner of dipping his feather into the abyssal ink pot, his elegant smile adorning his cheeks, or his voice carrying the voice of chiliad angels, or—

“If you continue staring at me, you’ll make me blush~”

Having been caught red-handed, the exclamation sparked an oppugnant reactions, leaving his cheeks at the mercy of scarlet apples and making him want to bury himself beneath mounds of bedsheets.

Declining the teasing and averting his head to the side , Isaac said “I suggest we pretend to have discussed our... quarrel. You know they tend to worry endlessly.”

There was a subtle shift in the nuance of Dazai’s posture, almost resembling a covered bird’s cage, waiting for its turmoil to be revealed.

“Don’t delude yourself.”

It was barely a transient whisper, lightsome yet so immensely heartsore Isaac had to halt, processing if he’d heard correctly; the uncharacteristically deafening scratching of a pen sliding across paper deepened his shock.

...this was what Arthur had meant when discussing the possibility of Dazai’s mayhem. That void in his eyes.

Quite possibly, were the physicist to reflect upon his following thoughts and actions, cruelty and manipulation reigned the battlefield in his view. Oblivious as he was, he never realized his actions to have a much purer and innocent fount, rather than for the single desire of gaining knowledge.

After all, love was more than just a unique concept to him; whether it be platonic or intimate, it had always seemed so... afar. Unreachable even. An unfamiliar ground, ruled by sweet chaos.

...it was utterly absurd! He sank his brow into the the palm of his hand. Why was he so worried for the fellow vampire? They all had issues, didn’t they? They all carried baggage from their previous life... so why did he care so much about the author’s troubles?

Isaac couldn’t possibly still want to befriend him?

...Nay, it was his insatiable thirst to solve every equation, surely. And he was a scholar with the sole purpose to solve the equation of this world, and its variables finally seemed to arrange in his favour.

Said variable being Dazai’s unforeseen display of trauma.

“You cannot possibly believe that they’d ignore your vacant spot at dinner,” Isaac started, alert in his tone. “Especially Arthur’s... whatever-she-is-to-him will succumb to her usual tendencies.”

The other vampire wasn’t smiling at him, no, his facade was an eerily empty one, unlike any of his expressions he’d laid his eyes on. Not only his smile was void, his eyes had lost their habitual mirth as well. Black holes mirrored in the pupils of his eyes.

“Besides, it’s not like you don’t enjoy our company...”

By then, the black hole kept growing, threatening to swallow him. Its intense stare prompted goosebumps to litter his skin, vulnerable. He’d never seen this sorrow portrayed by the charlatan.

To hell with it. He wanted to leave the discomfort.

“Listen, I’ll let you jest me without complain— for today. So can we please just agree to have talked?” he asked. “Or we could talk... whatever makes you happy, I suppose.” He tilted his head, closing his eyes in thought, peeking one opened as he waited for Dazai to reply.

“Go ahead without me. I’ll stay here, Ai-chan,” he declared, glee pulling at his lips as if he wouldn’t have just waddled in some unknown swamp.

“They’ll ask me questions about it, you know?”

“Very well.” Isaac’s eyebrows shot up his forehead. That was all it took for him to open up? “Dazai Osamu isn’t my real name.”

He was about to snap, irritation bubbling in his voice at the useless information he used to dodge the topic once again, but was able to stop himself. Epiphany chasing away the storm clouding his mind, he realized an important piece to solving this equation.

It was something Arthur had droned on about, one of Dazai’s works, No Longer Human. The protagonist wore a facade of hollow jocularity as he was unable to present his true self. Additionally, a piece of yourself slithers it’s way into every piece of art you create... according to Leonardo, at least.

A facade of hollow jocularity... observing the male opposing him, that phrase seemed gruesomely familiar.

“You still haven’t answered me,” he told the Author.

“Pardon?”

“I asked whether you’d be happier wit—“

“My happiness mustn’t be your concern.”

Muscles tensed as these eerie words coursed through his mind, nature’s symphony from earlier drowned out by it’s unforgiving echo. Albeit, as much as he desired to crawl someplace secluded, apart from dealing with human emotion, his mind dictated his stay.

Mustering up the courage from the depths of his heart, he spoke, “But you aren’t weak, Dazai.”

The man visibly startled, arm jerking violently into the desk, garnering a quiet foreign-sounding curse. Isaac took the opportunity to join Dazai’s side, blasé to the anxious trembling of his own lip.

“Arthur is quite familiar with your works, and I kept one particular quote in remembrance.”

The Japanese almost seemed to cower in his seat, shoulders hunched as he held his throbbing elbow.

“The weak fear happiness itself,” he recited to the best of his abilities. “As far as I’m concerned, weak doesn’t exactly describe you.”

As if he’d burned a bird cage’s linen, breaking its lock open only for the bird to panic in distrust, Dazai flew up into a stand. Eyebrows scrunching as his mouth spit bigger poems.

“How could you know? How could you possibly know of all my fears?”

Isaac’s feeling of helplessness commenced its intensity, pushing his shoulders to earth’s core. But he couldn’t stay his efforts then.

“I don’t need to. Seeing you standing before me gives me enough reason to believe so.”

“I ended my own life.”

He had to control every fiber of his being to rule his body into submission. The waltzing hairs couldn’t be precluded from showing their discomfort, however.

“Do you realize what this makes me? I’m a coward— a coward who only stands before you to— to—“

Had he finished his sentence, it would have been incoherent at best. Isaac could only watch as the author’s shoulders sacked into themselves, chest jumping in no particular pattern. His fingers snaked around the pristine fabric, just above his heart, as though he tried to confine the bird once again.

He was having a panic attack, a foe not uncommon to the physicist himself. But how could he possibly act as a cure when he was the disease?

Barely conscious of the act, his hands curled around the man’s iron grip; they struggled to enshroud the pain of his throat constricting, mutating the simple feat of breathing into a conquest of charging air puffs.

This wasn’t his domain. He’d never had to be along side a troubled person, inclined to walk the earth alone. There was no need for a circle of brethren when he had his formulas that constructed his life.

Humans were no formulas. And Dazai was no equation. His feelings were no variables. Isaac battled to come to terms with the fact that he couldn’t continue striving in solitude.

He realised that that must have been their reason for locking him inside the vicinity. The constellation of empathy coming undone before him. They’d wanted him to accept the fact that he couldn’t live like the everything could be solved in the same manner as his mathematics.

He’d show them. He’d create a formula solely for him, just as he had created multiple ones for every other problem he had encountered.

“There is a phenomenon, a mirage at the end of a horizon—“

“A-Ai-chan—,”

“Just keep quiet for one minute,” he snapped, “I know that is strenuous for someone as verbose as you, but right now, allow me to talk.”

If it was possible to solve an equation by keeping to a formula, surely it was the same for humans? But life was unique, every being disparate, an especial star.

“It distorts the objects, rendering it unrecognizable,” he elaborated. “Such phenomenon is referred to as Fata Morgana.”

He’d commit perjury were he to claim that he was calm. Forces of all kinds threatened him to collapse onto all fours, leaving him at the mercy of his lungs to commence his breathing. Yet, he kept his facade of cool determination, the fear of the man further breaking stronger than his own.

“I don’t know of all the horror you might have gone through,” he said. “But perhaps, it is distorting you to think that you are undeserving of happiness.”

“I—“

“Perhaps, you simply don’t realise that you standing here doesn’t mean you are a coward, but that you are strong.”

Before he even realised his body’s efforts, he already felt silken fabric caressing his cheek as his arms pulled him toward the other man. Choosing to ignore the charlatan’s droplets of anguish falling onto his shoulder, he shuffled his feet as he didn’t know how he should position himself.

“As such, I believe that your happiness is indeed my concern.”

He made a mental reminder to thank Leonardo for his philosophy books later, grateful for the lessons he could convey.

A rough, yet mellifluent laughter enveloped his ears, the urge to scratch where bouts of air were tickling his ear were stilled by the comforting notes.

“Who knew you were such a charmer, Ai-chan?”

His blood running a marathon across the veins of his cheeks, he drew his face nigh into the men’s chest in an effort to mask his crimson shade.

“Shut up.”

Dazai truly did believe in his guardian hitherto. Especially as the man brushed with the faintest of cherry blossom petals embosomed in his arms.

And Isaac might have been unable to teach the bird to take flight again, unqualified of the task himself, but perchance, they could aid one another to learn the art of raising yourself to face the winds, leaving them no choice but to carry you.

#ikemen vampire #ikemen series #ikemen fanfiction #ikemen headcanons #ikevamp #ikevam isaac #ikemen isaac #ikevamp athur #ikemen arthur #ikevam arthur #ikemen dazai #ikevam dazai #ikemen leonardo #ikemen napoleon #ikevam napoleon #ikemen angst

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windstorm64 · 4 years

Text

Attack on Discourse I Guess

I swear to god if I see one more post on tumblr dot com saying that Attack on Titan is “pro-fascism” or “pro-imperialism” I’m gonna lose my freaking...

*deep breath*

Listen, I absolutely want people to be critical of the media they consume, especially from Japan. Due to their role in WW2 and their glorification of past military actions from their conservative side, there’s a lot of Japanese media that contains themes and imagery that would (ideally) not at all fly in the west. Sometimes it’s harmless, being simply misguided, other times it’s bad, containing some pretty horrific subtext regardless of the author's actual intention. Attack on Titan absolutely does contain themes of imperialism, xenophobia, propaganda, extreme nationalism, and more. But the all important distinction here is that Attack on Titan does it

with.

purpose.

It’s NOT condoning them. Just like how Lolita isn’t promoting pedophilia, or the clockwork orange isnt promoting whatever the heck that movie is about, simply having these themes present in your story does not mean they are being condoned.

Do I blame people for not understanding that at first? No. AoT takes its sweet time when developing its themes, and is constantly overturning what you thought you knew about its worldviews. That’s just the kind of story it is. It will go incredibly into detail about a plethora of opposing views, some being downright deplorable, and takes extra care to make them all look inviting and sweet. You don’t realize it at the time, but what seems to be the only right answer at the time is secretly ushering in the worst that man can muster. That’s how it is in real life. That’s how these evils get into real society; “with thunderous applause”. The difference here is that AoT, even if it takes 100 chapters to do so, slowly but surely will overturn all these themes and let the right way show itself over the course of the series. It doesn’t hold your hand, it doesn’t sugarcoat it, and I’ll even admit that I was a little nervous during some parts over what exactly the author was trying to say, but every single time Isayama chose to let the reader decide what was right in the moment, until AoT’s own in-universe marketplace of ideas eventually worked as intended and snuffed out the unsavory.

Does that mean you personally have to enjoy seeing it? No. The marketplace of ideas approach often does not work in real life (punching nazis is good) and seeing it used in fiction might not be your cup of tea.

Does that mean I think all of its themes are handled well or tactfully? Absolutely not. There are some stories that I think are handled VERY poorly, with the redemption of Magath’s character, for example, being downright horrendous. But those aren’t the complaints I hear from you people. All I hear are the same tired arguments that have been countered in-universe time and time again.

You think the survey corps are an allegory promoting imperialism? Then you’ll love the part where the real villains are revealed to be actual greedy governments invading foreign lands to oppress and murder the populace and steal valuable resources. And how the main characters, in-turn to learning that there’s more people out there in the world, switch their goals from expanding their territory to understanding and allying with the outside population.

The titans represent xenophobia? Then you’ll love the internal conflicts of the main cast when they realize that the titans are just like them, and the constant struggle thereafter against the prejudiced countries outside the walls who seek to punish them for their ethnicity.

Nationalism? Propaganda? The story has just spent the better part of 2 arcs displaying just how evil, dangerous, and reality-warping these things can be.

Fascism? Y’all’s favorite arc would probably be the one where the main cast literally overthrows their own corrupt fascist government because it was, in fact, fascist and corrupt.

German influences glorify nazism? Germany does not equal nazi. The author is clearly a fan of all parts of German history, and is a fan of war memorabilia in general (which admittedly becomes pretty risky when looking through the lens of conservative Japan’s notoriously glorified WW2 outlook), but nothing about it supports Nazism, or any of their ideals. Misguided? Perhaps, I can’t say I’m a fan. But it doesn’t denote anything about the author's character that we can reasonably glean. Eventually the true villains of Aot were given clear similarities to Nazis, clarifying Isayama's true moral priorities.

And before any of y’all start trying to point out what the author said in the past- I KNOW what the author has said. Or rather, what he was rumored to have said. But even if the rumors are true, and that shitty ignorant take on Twitter about Japan and Korea was from him, it's 100% the kind of thing that can be called out and learned from. The tweet was like, what? 10 years ago? Maybe more? Even if it was him he has clearly been educated on the deeper implications of his statement, as evidenced by the way these themes are handled in his story. Attack on Titan directly condemns eugenics on multiple occasions. It tackles it in a surprisingly on-the-nose way too, compared to how the series handled its serious themes prior to that point.

That's why I WANT y’all to be critical of the media you intake. So you CAN call out the glorification of unsavory themes and bring them to the attention of those in charge of them. Because that’s how people learn and grow. That’s how you create an educated populace that understands the implications of the things they create. I am 110% convinced that all these themes were tackled in AoT BECAUSE of all the criticism he got in the past. 10 years is a long time, and we are still getting new developments to this day that challenge the themes introduced in the first couple of chapters. Whether or not these themes were planned to be tackled from the start, or were introduced later on after being called out, is something we’ll probably never know. But please do yourselves a favor and learn what the heck you’re talking about, and the context around it, before going off for years about misguided claims. Don’t cheapen words that should be reserved for the most grievous of behaviors when you really just want to make a point.

Attack on Titan is a brutal nuanced story that shows off the worst that humanity has to offer, and how hard it is to do the right thing in a world where the right thing doesn’t always work. But taking an honest, elongated approach to exploring how these themes interact with humanity and society is NOT the same as promoting it. If you like your stories more black and white, where the good and bad of real world themes are more clearly defined as opposed to AoT’s more nihilistic and gray approach to morality, then by all means go enjoy that other story. I’m not trying to convince anyone to like it. I’m not expecting everyone to enjoy seeing these themes shoved in your face every installment. And I’m certainly not expecting anyone to understand all of this right away, hell I’m constantly arguing with dudebro AoT fans on reddit who are SURPRISED that Armin and the Alliance are taking an anti-genocide stance. And somehow I’m the crazy one for seeing this plot line coming for literal years. There’s simply just a lot more to this story than you can understand at a glance, and I implore anyone who thinks that’s they can simplify the real world themes dealt with here in such a menial way to seriously reconsider.

You are welcome to dislike Attack on Titan. You are more than welcome to criticize it’s possible mismanagement of sensitive real world themes. I am not so enamored by Isayama’s writing to expect a young manga artist to be the forefront of knowledge on such complicated, disturbing topics. But please, cut it out with the crazy claims. I’ve been hearing these things for so many years and it’s all the same. AoT has risen to become one of the most popular anime/manga of the current era. If the story was really as deplorable as you claim it would not have become as popular as it has been. The fans aren’t stupid (well, not all of them. Together, we can beat the reddit dudebros and save the world). This didn’t happen by mistake. The fans aren’t ignorant of the messages it’s sending. Attack on Titan is just... good! Even if I can’t get you to agree with me on that, at least look at it honestly for what it is, and what it’s trying to be. It’s really, really, not at all what you think, or what other tumblr users are trying to get you to believe.

#attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #aot #snk #eren yeager #armin arlert #snk anime #aot anime #snk manga #aot manga #discourse #fascism #imperialism #genocide

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strawberrybabydog · 2 years

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thank you for talking about the transabled thing bc we have BIID & are chronically & mentally ill and physically cannot think about the way some Tumblr Kids ruined a good term for a harmless experience for too long without getting really upset. I didnt ask for Any of this and the idea that someone wants to hallucinate or whatever is mind-boggling. imo it just sounds like kids being kids and doing shit for attention that they'll regret once they're older. but idk there are some wild people out there

to an extent i appreciate kids being kids. i was once an attention seeking 12 year old, and while i do regret it (obviously, although i didnt do anything as aggregious as THIS) i also understand that i was doing it as a cry for help. my behavior wasnt entirely my own fault, and if literally a single adult in my life had done an ounce of critical thinking, i would have gotten the support i needed & wouldnt have felt like i had to cry for help. i agree with you but i dont really like dismissing attention seeking behavior from kids, cuz kids dont do shit For No Reason & that mindset is what made me be like that in the first place & prevented me from getting support i desperately needed /lh /not scolding u. yes kids are dumb and annoying but theyre also Very vulnerable and they still should get the support they need, yknow? not saying ur not saying this, im just kinda rambling

... but like i said, what i was doing wasnt as aggregious as this. whatever i did only caused internal harm and affected nobody other than myself. the older i get, the more ive watched Internet Kids become more harmful to themselves and, especially others. its fun to argue when youre a stupid rebellious 12 year old but, when i was a kid there wasnt "discourse." it was arguing with conservative christians about gay marriage (like, very black and white issues, because 12 year olds cant understand nuance)... infighting didnt really exist back then... nothing similar to this existed back then

idk. there is no solution. the power lies in the hands of parents who clearly dont care. best we can do as tumblr.hell citizens is to just ignore it until it goes away. even i feel bad for talking about it because i am also now bringing attention to it

it is also mind boggling to me that someone who isnt like me at all, sees me & my struggles, and wants them. slush is very cool, but positive interactions with my hoarde only make up about 20% of living with DCS. the rest is being re-traumatized on a daily basis (which, yeah is actually sometimes by my hoarde too)... i fear i romanticize living with schizophrenia because i often talk positively about my experiences, but i have never spoken to a single person about my trauma related to it because i literally cant. i choke up completely. its just too painful for me. its unfathomable to broadcast that to thousands if not even my partner knows

#sorry adhd people for not bolding btw i know im horrible !!! i just dont want to bring a whole lot of attention 2 stupid discourse #this post isnt super important mostly ramblings #dogcourse #not dog #asks

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alexanderpusheen · 3 years

Text

what frustrates me the most abt this china narrative is that the US created al qaeda and ISIS, those groups are recruiting and causing terrorism in xinjiang, china has been trying to handle the situation with re-education programs often suggested by westerners, and its still being treated as this major human rights violation. there are actually dozens of countries with several robust anti radicalization programs that are just as strict, like singapore, colombia, yemen, bangladesh, saudi arabia, and indonesia. this paper ive linked to was even funded by the DHS so like...why has detaining someone and basically reverse brainwashing them out of being a terrorist been so acceptable for so long but now its an issue?

if you take issue with chinas program, you have to prove its somehow exceptional to these other programs. since we really dont have any way of knowing what is truth or reality thanks to the enormous disinformation campaign going on, you fucking cant. we dont even know what the programs entail because even googling it gets you exclusively hyperbolic concentration camp accusations.

what i will say is that relations between the han majority and the uyghur minority have been strained since at least the 80s. link is the notoriously conservative and pro US intervention human rights watch, so dont say im using pro commie sources or anything. every time i do any bit of research on this i seem to find an attempt from major news outlets in the early to mid 2000s or late 20-teens to prove this all started or became dramatically worse now, but things have always been tense. and its not really a surprise that things really got bad after the collapse of the soviet union, an event that was geographically close to china and the xinjiang region and also just like, a fucking major global event in general.

what i find to be very odd is just how dramatically the narrative has changed. the diplomat, one of my favorite periodicals, went from taking very nuanced and balanced positions on xinjiang that i almost completely agreed with to being just as aggressive as outlets like the BBC and CNN in the span of five years. they have eleven pages worth of articles on xinjiang, mostly covering the terrorism and beijings response (which i agree is too harsh) and xinjiang muslims’ relationships to the greater muslim world.

an example is how this article talks about the conflict at the time which warns of escalating violence as a result of han chauvinism and beijing being unable to deal with the extremism holistically. it points out how there were uyghurs captured among taliban ranks in afghanistan and how many might have even been working with ISIL.

The threat will not be an existential one to the Chinese state, as most Uighurs would prefer a peaceful accommodation. But even if only 1 percent of Uighurs hold extreme views, there are 10 million in Xinjiang and even for a state security apparatus as formidable as China’s, 100,000 or more angry people present a tough challenge.

i think its totally right that china does not allow people in that area to have cars, woodcutting tools, and amonium nitrate (which is used in bombs) is very strictly regulated. i completely agree that this is not how you combat terrorism. most people do not want war and broadly punishing these people is itself a human rights violation that went unnoticed until now.

however, in that same year, the diplomat also published this article about the infamous turkestan islamic party. members of TIP are like, literal jihadists lmfao.

TIP fighters call on the world’s Muslims to join the jihad against Western countries in internet videos. Perhaps most worringly for China, the TIP believes that Muslims may fight locally using various means instead of coming to Syria and Iraq to conduct a “holy war” against the “infidel” Western regimes.

yeah i definitely want to hear more about what these guys have to say. the article is really good because i think it highly illustrates just how dangerous these people are. theyve killed hundreds of people across china and want to establish a fascist religious state in xinjiang. while the article speaks for itself, i believe the last paragraph really highlights why china is being singled out whereas countries like france and canada are considered allies to muslims for whatever reason:

However, as experience has shown, China takes a passive position in the struggle against global Islamic jihad in Syria and Iraq. Beijing has not sent its troops to the Middle East to fight ISIS and has instead confined itself to diplomatic support for Russia and the United States. The Chinese government uses the attacks of Islamic jihadists to persuade Western countries to support Beijing’s position on Xinjiang and turn a blind eye when the freedom and rights of Uyghurs are harshly suppressed by Chinese security forces. Therefore, China is not perceived by the West as a reliable partner in the fight against terrorism. [emphasis mine]

im just a little surprised to see that a lot of these violent attacks from extremists throughout the years have targeted not just han chinese but also other uyghurs. in the west people do not typically sympathize with terrorists as freedom fighters, even on the left, because we know that no matter how angry or how seemingly justified the violence might seem, terrorism is unacceptable and it grossly misrepresents islam. it is a fascist act because those terrorists often follow an extremely right wing version of islam. also, we know that those who carry out terrorist attacks even outside of the west are middle class and professionals in some way, not poor and marginalized people. the level of nuance afforded to terrorists outside of xinjiang is pretty staggering.

yet in china, there seems to be this excitement than they are killing chinese people, even if some of those chinese are other uyghers or otherwise muslims. those who carry out attacks in xinjiang dont get any nuance or analysis because theyre justified.

ive referenced the diplomat earlier but this article from 2013 says it perfectly: Call Tiananmen Attack What It Was: Terrorism. except terrorism is bad. and the west wants you to support the uyghurs. and make no mistake, they do not want you to support the millions of uyghurs who want to live peacefully, free of any repression, american or chinese. they want you to support the jihadists randomly blowing up chinese and tourists alike because you are meant to sympathize with their plight.

terrorism isnt something to be romantacized or cheered on. it is something someone or someones do when they feel they have no other option. people do not want to kill even those they feel they have every right to because thats a line you cant uncross. murder changes you, justified or not. see the last chapter of wretched of the earth for this.

terrorism is great, however, for destabilizing a region or a country, and xinjiang is resource-rich. establishing a US-friendly regime, no matter how good they are on human rights, is the goal. the US does not care about muslims. they do not care about human rights. china, also, does not really seem to care about muslims or human rights either. but we’ve seen this since vietnam, and the US has learned since vietnam. the vietnamese were sympathetic. they were minding their business.

after vietnam, merely being communist isnt enough to warrant invasion. theyre killing their own people. nevermind that bolsonaro kills his own people and no one wants to invade (yet--biden has mention sanctions wrt us which is scary but again, thats got everything to do with making sure latin america is loyal to the west, not HR offenses). korea, although it was before vietnam, was less publicized and learning from vietnam gave the US a valuable lesson: always blame the victim. and thus, the US blames the victims of its violence. even if its ‘justified’, even if its ‘true,’ as was the case with saddam hussein, invading and occupying was the nightmare no one but the imperialists anticipated. because they dont broadcast what occupying forces do to the occupied. i am old enough to remember abu ghraib. have it seared in my memory forever. you perhaps are also old enough to remember, but also think millions of abu ghraibs and guantanamo bays are always worth it, always justified.

i know people arent going to read this and remind me really rudely that they didnt read it but i want to really emphasize how one of imperialism and colonialisms features is ethnic and racial separatism. how the rwandan genocide couldnt have happened without previous belgian and french rule. how yugoslavia wouldve remained a single country had it not been for NATO. i think its easy to diminish the role of the colonizer in all of this, but it is actually one of its goals: divide and conquer. exacerbate the existing conflicts to the point of genocide.

and if the west succeeds in balkanizing china, you will get more racism rather than less. you will see more violence against muslim minorities rather than less. they will feel less empowered rather than more. china has to learn that they are also to blame in a way that will be catastrophic for over a billion people. han chauvinism and outright racism must be addressed beyond window dressing.

wrapping up, china is in the wrong here. what theyre doing is racist and humiliating a population that has to be empowered. and the one child rule, even for the han majority, is imo fucking evil lol like sorry tankie tumblr im tankie too but i cannot for the life of me accept that as a good thing.... but i also dont buy the accusations of genocide, because even tho a lot of these articles are kind of glossing over it, china is trying to handle the terrorism in the region. imo theyre feeding into it by getting more han in the area, but also having more han but forcing them to take worse jobs would be a show of good will. idk, this situation is extremely complex and frankly, most uyghers do not want secession.

i also take extreme issue with people saying that adrian zenz is somehow reliable. not only is he a nazi crackpot, hes also literally the only source for almost all of what we know about this in the west. that is not how you do journalism. i dont understand how people are saying ‘yeah hes an extremely fascist grifter but also i believe him because hes anti communist and also anti china’. thats also not really the point? the point is that hes also the ONLY SOURCE on almost all of this, which is alarming.

i also find it very startling that in order to keep interest in the story, every few weeks the US has to remind people that the chinese are also doing what the US is doing to women in its own camps. forget that the US is separating minors from parents (since 2008). forget that the US is sterilizing women en masse (since 2017). forget that the US is raping women at the border (since there was a border). forget the US even has camps because now they arent even called that anymore. this is not that ‘you can be angry at two things at once’ but a clearly cynical attempt to get its citizens to forget that the US is detaining, deporting, sterilizing, and raping, and gassing non US nationals.

they are not ‘your own people.’ they are me. the other. i am an immigrant to the US, currently in my country of birth, so i am the other to you, the american. the chinese are doing the evil crime of killing their own. but the americans could never kill their own because they dont consider black americans to be their own. latin american nationals are not their own. bombing millions globally is not their own. thats always justifiable. there is clearly an element of racism in how these crimes are perceived as more or less evil.

the way immigrants and black americans are brutalized in the US is almost naturalized. like its the way things are supposed to be. you can live with that. its upsetting that you have to hear about antiblackness and the like but you know thats just how life is. you dont necessarily call for the US to be sanctioned or bombed by other countries because you believe in the inherent goodness of white america. but countries like china and iran and north korea deserve to be starved and killed for their crimes. and you can never say ‘maybe bombing and starving a country isnt the answer’ because it means you agree with it. you can never say ‘this is clearly propaganda to make me hate another race so much’ because it means youre a genocide denier. im sorry, but again, i remember iraq in 2003, i remember libya in 2011. i dont buy it.

finally, theres been a lot of attacks on asian people in the US lately and if you cannot see the violent way the US talks about china the country and how that influences people to harm asians within the US then idk what else to tell you. people will really believe this shit and say the chinese are all blood thirsty islamaphobes and thus need to be harmed. ‘im not like that! i defend my asian friends from racism!’ thats nice and all but idk how spreading some sinophobic propaganda designed by the US to make you support some kind of violence against one billion chinese people isnt inherently racist. also its unhelpful because sanctions dont really solve problems. but ive spoken too much.

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aplaceforthesoul · 3 years

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my abandonment issues are making things really hard as i’m separating from someone who realized she was aromantic while we were together. she still wants to be friends although she hasn’t texted me hardly at all since before she said she didn’t want to be together anymore and it isnt her responsibility to make me feel better but i have been really scared lately and spiraling and i want to ask her to just explain some things that i’m not sure if it’ll be the same or different but it’s been over a month now that it just hasn’t worked out to have a conversation naturally and i’ve felt like if i nag at her about it she’ll just decide to cut off completely and i don’t think she’s doing anything that should make her deserve for me to feel that way and i think i’m just scared on my own but i just feel like such a piece of work to be in any kind of relationship with including a friendship and now that we aren’t in something with definition like our relationship had i feel like she doesn’t have a reason to stick with me at all. and i don’t want her to think that i think being friends is somehow less because i dont and i want to be friends with her just as much as i wanted to be dating or anything im just afraid that its going to fall apart on its own with no defined foundation to hold it together. that was always a difference between us too i want definition and for everything to make sense so that i can feel safe and she doesn’t like setting expectations or confining herself to them and so i feel bad requesting anything from her especially because she doesn’t owe me anything and i’m not doing anything to make her life better that really feels like it will matter when she’s deciding if she even cares about me at all and the thing is she used to be the only person i trusted enough to share my feelings with and now i feel like if i tell her how afraid i am about everything even still it feels like it will only lower her opinion of me and there’s nothing concrete ensuring that she won’t get rid of me anymore. honestly it all boils down to that i’m really really scared but i feel like if i let her see that she’ll only realize more and more how awful of a person i really am to know.

so you’re partly right in saying that it’s not her ‘responsibility to make you feel better — if she’s now realised that she’s aromantic and she wasn’t happy dating then she had every right to end the relationship. it’s not fair or right for her to remain in a relationship with you and sacrificing her happiness and well-being, it sucks but I think we can both agree on that.

however!!! she also said she wanted to remain friends, right? and right now she’s doing everything opposite of being a friend. she’s not communicating with you, she’s not really making an effort for you at the moment. you have a right to expect her to do things like that, because she said she wanted to be friends! if she needs some time and space to figure things out then that’s completely fine, but right now she’s saying one thing and doing another, and that’s not fair. if you want to be friends with someone then be a friend, if you can’t manage a friendship at the moment then say that. words mean something, they matter. she can’t say to you “lets still be friends” and then just…not actually be a friend.

we haven’t met so I don’t know what makes you think that you’re an awful person? but what i’m reading and the vibe I’m getting from you, you’re not :* people who are genuinely awful don’t think that they are! someone who is a real piece of work doesn’t think that they’re being nasty or selfish at all — the fact that you’re sitting here admitting you have flaws and worrying about being a bad person by definition makes you a relatively good person. we’re only human and yes we make mistakes and mess up sometimes, but that doesn’t make you a fundamentally bad person.

her happiness is important, yes. her sense of comfort and well-being is important, yes. but so is yours? so is yours.

saying that you’re worried the friendship “will fall apart on its own with no defined foundation to hold it together” is really vulnerable and poignant thing to say, and I agree with you. relationships do need to be defined and they need to have boundaries to be healthy and happy and stable — whether that’s a platonic relationship (friends) or a romantic relationship or any other kind of relationship. she does owe you something, because she was the one who said she wanted to be friends. she’s now doing the opposite of what she said, she’s being confusing and creating extra stress for you, she does owe you an explanation and some communication.

so…what to do now, how to go about resolving this? first thing is to figure out what you want. do you want to be friends, is that something that is going to be good and healthy and positive for you? sometimes as much as we might want something, it may not always be good for us ): sometimes the best thing after a breakup is to have some space, allowing yourself time to process the pain and to start to heal can be a better choice to make. you can definitely be friends with ex partners? but when a breakup is still very fresh and raw and painful, it can be almost impossible to continue to have a healthy bond with someone.

second thing is to talk to her. if you are determined to be friends then you need to talk to her, explain that right now she’s not being very fair and this isn’t how friends act. I don’t think that talking to her about things will make her think that being friends is somehow less worthy? 0: just be honest, that’s all you can really do. I think everything that you’ve mentioned here (needing things to be defined to make sense and to feel more stable, feeling worried the friendship won’t survive as there isn’t a lot of communication) is important and justified and valid. I hope she won’t see it as ‘nagging’, because it’s not! but if she does view it that way and gets irritated with you bringing up legitimate worries and issues…then I guess it shows her true colours, and it’s clear that it’s now time to step away and spend time away from her.

there’s a lot of conversation on tumblr about mental health, self care, being ‘responsible’ for your own emotions etc? but there’s also a lot of nuance that gets lost, these topics and discussions require context too. sometimes we get so tied up in the idea of ‘personal responsibility’ of others that it can become unhealthy, and concepts can get a little twisted. the idea of personal responsibility does have its limits! no you don’t have a responsibility to shoulder the emotional pain of others, no you don’t have a responsibility to place other people’s happiness above your own, no you don’t always “owe” people your time or energy or explanations (especially if they’ve been unkind or harassed you in the past). collectively though, we all have a responsibility to be kinder to each other and to build a better future by creating community is something to strive for. that starts by being compassionate, by knowing that even if you don’t have a ‘responsibility’ to emotionally support someone or be there for them, it’s still a good thing to do! I guess when it comes down to it, it’s all about balance. if you’re in a mentally good space then help someone, if you’re struggling then it’s 100% ok to put yourself first. your friend is going through the pain of this breakup too — but she was also the one who said she wanted to still be friends. she gave herself the responsibility of being a friend, if she didn’t want that then she shouldn’t have said it. so yes, she does owe you an explanation and some communication. good luck, I hope things work out alright for you xxx

- tash

#advice #friends #relationships #breakup #aromantic #aro #communication #Anonymous

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