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#like when my mom got mad at me for saying
rafeschicana · 3 days
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𐙚˙✧˖°📷 ༘ ⋆。 ˚ just like her mama/daddy 𐙚˙✧˖°📷 ༘
dad!rafe x mom!reader
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the constant beeping woke you from your afternoon nap. only given birth three weeks ago naps with your newborn baby were routine. you blinked, slowly bringing your hands to your face and rubbing your eyes. it’s only when you hear a shriek, do you sit up in bed panicking. you quickly look to the left of your bed where your daughter’s bassinet is, finding it empty. after struggling with removing the throw blanket that was tangled between your legs, you leave the room in search of your newborn daughter and her father.
“i’m sorry baby i know, i know mama is smarter than daddy, please be patient” rafe whispers to the fussy baby who whines in his arms. “Just let me put you down for one second!” he pleads to a fussy ari. that is when you decide to help. “i got it” you giggle walking towards the bottle warmer rafe couldn’t get started. “sorry we woke you, babe, she’s hungry and i couldn’t get that shit on.” he mumbles.
“that’s okay, our baby is like her father very impatient..when he wants something.” you smirk making him shake his head. the sound of his raspy laugh calming the little bundle in his arms. “how are you feeling?” the simple question warming up your insides. rafe was already a loving husband before becoming a father. now seeing him as a dad almost brings you to tears every time. “im okay i needed that nap” you whisper running a finger down ari’s nose.
“she's so beautiful” you now understood what everyone says about moms believing they have the cutest newborn in the world. “just like her mama” rafe bent down placing a gentle kiss on your lips. he never fails to make you feel beautiful even though you thought you looked a mess. wearing one of rafe's shirts which now had spit-up stains. his own sweats were also covered in dried-up milk. it was all part of the new parent life. you'd get adjusted soon enough.
ari squirmed in her father’s arms. bottom lip forming a baby pout. “my princess don't you start i hate seeing you cry.” rafe cooed rocking back and forth. “it’s coming ari girl” pulling the bottle from the warmer you tested out the temperature on your wrist. “just needs a couple of seconds to cool down” your girl was very picky when it came to her milk temperature. if it was room temperature she wouldn't take it, spitting it right out with a whine. It needed to be the perfect in-between. “mama’s got milk okay let's go sit down” rafe moved towards the living room with you following behind.
immediately snuggling into both of your loves as they rested on the sofa. “it should be good” you smiled passing rafe ari’s bottle. “only three ounces lets see how fast she drinks this shit” rafe joked knowing his baby was a hungry little thing. “We might have to change her schedule to a bottle every two hours.” it'll be hard but maybe she'll sleep a little longer through the night.
“hey, hey slow down princess it ain't going anywhere” rafe gently removed the bottle from ari’s mouth. ari let out an angry breath, furrowing her eyebrows. “i think she's mad at you daddy” you giggled craning your neck to kiss his nose. rafe threw his head back in silent laughter “she looks so funny when she's mad” he brought the bottle back to her mouth. ari immediately going back to drinking her milk in slow gulps. “still cute though”
“just like her daddy” you whispered before letting your eyes close into slumber.
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Alrighty! @number-one-shadisper-shipper and I binged the Knuckles series today, so time for thoughts! SPOILER ALERT.
I'll admit the show wasn't perfect. I've seen the negative reviews, and I kinda get where they come from. BUT! I did enjoy this show greatly! And I'm not here to complain. Time for some happy thoughts, y'all! 💙🤩
I think you need to have a love, not just tolerance, for the SCU in order to properly enjoy this show. I do have such, so I had a lot of fun with it.
There were definitely scenes from every episode that had me either squealing, laughing, crying, or flipping out. But my favorite was likely the first episode, because come on, we saw the Wachowski family! Most of them, anyway! While I missed Tom's presence, I was grateful for that comment from Maddie about him being "out of town," so he wasn't just gone for no reason.
The SECOND it showed our three space babies hanging out together in their room?! I SCREAMED. THE BOYS!!!!
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Tails sitting on his bed tinkering with one of his gizmos, Sonic rocking out to music with an air guitar, and Knuckles exercising from one of the ceiling planks. IT'S THEM!!! They're just hanging out, doing their thing, looking oh so much like brothers. And Sonic's narration at the beginning was GOLD. 🤣💙
Even though we didn't get enough of Maddie being a parent, we definitely got a nice chunk for it only lasting part of an episode. Maddie called Knuckles "one of our kids" (that had me SCREECHING). The angry mama vibes were GOLDEN. 🤣 The way she made breakfast for them, the "Boys, breakfast is ready!" I love the normalcy of it! Can't wait to see more in the future! (Her calling to them with "boys" is somehow just the sweetest thing and I'm melting.)
The poor mailman being like "I just wanna go home, man" 🤣
We were right, fellas, Knuckles had no idea what being grounded meant. 🤣 Although the way Sonic piped up with "Oh, I definitely know what it means," has me suspecting that Sonic himself has gotten grounded a decent amount before. 😂
Knuckles trying to talk back, and Maddie going, "ExCUSE ME?!" then just making those tiny, terrifying noises and Sonic being like "Bro don't mess with Mom when she's mad" (okay, he didn't say "mom" and that made me sad, but the mom vibes were 110% there so I'm here for it). 😂 And since Knuckles snuck out and later Wade said, several times, "Aren't you grounded?" seems to confirm that this entire show is basically what Knuckles does when he's grounded. 🤣 Although ... his comment about not being able to be grounded because he had no home made me very sad. 😭
I did not have an issue with so much Wade screentime! Sure, he isn't my favorite SCU character, but I love what this show did with him! I'd already seen his moments in the movies (like nearly shooting Robotnik in the face with an actual handgun). I like how they gave him actual family issues; a dad who abandoned him and his family, a realistic sister, a mom. Bad family memories. Awkward reunions. They could've made it a joke, but they didn't, and I greatly appreciate that. Especially since I've witnessed firsthand how painful family separations can be. 😔
All the emotional talks Wade and Knuckles had caught me off guard in the best way! The way they talked about their different family issues, the way they talked of betrayal from friends, and being left alone, hit way harder than I was prepared for. Especially that talk they had at the burger place in the middle of the night? Oof. Good talk right there.
Also, even though they took a "show don't tell" take with it, I loved how Knuckles relaxed more and more throughout the show. In the beginning, he couldn't rest, he couldn't sit back and have a genuine good time. But the more he hung out with Wade and his family, the more he learned. He learned about music and found "his jam" (that was literally amazing btw). He watched movies with Mrs. Whipple and ate snacks in the hotel room in Reno and watched more movies. He had his teenager moments of rolling his eyes and rebelling, but he was so well portrayed here, I loved it. I felt for him.
Despite the bizarre nature of the episode "Flames of Disaster," (we were cracking up so hard) I'm trying to glean bits of the truth of Knuckles's story from the crazy musical play that Pachacamac put on in Wade's dream. I mean, "Longclaw" and her tribe were there, and ... what the heck was that giant demon thing?! Iblis?! Does our Knuckles Wachowski have an actual history with freaking Iblis?!?! 😱🔥
I was deeply intrigued by the two main antagonists, especially at the implication that G.U.N. did seem to exist before the events of the first movie?! Did it exist, get disbanded after the Maria incident, then get reformed?! My brain is exploding. 🤯 I was even more shocked that they apparently died? I guess I shouldn't be surprised, the Wachowski kids don't seem to have much qualms about getting rid of the baddies for good as the game versions do. That was a terrifying phenomenon, what happened with the two rings. 🫣
And then the Buyer getting crushed by the giant glass ball 👀
Although in those last two episodes, I admit I was freaking out and legitimately near tears at Wade's seemingly having to "betray" Knuckles. Before the reveal that all was in good communication, all I could think was how relaxed Knuckles finally seemed, chilling in the hotel room, being excited about whatever Wade wanted to "show" him, questioning whether it was a song, him declaring that he was going to bring his favorite hat, 🥹 all I could think was of their previous discussions about betrayal from friends and family, and when Knuckles called Wade "my friend" right before the elevator doors closed, I just about sobbed. I was like "please, don't let him be betrayed, don't let him have come all this way and relaxed so much only to get 'betrayed' once again by someone he's come to consider a friend." 😭 We heaved a HUGE sigh of relief when it revealed he was aware of the trap the whole time. 😪
Maternal instincts went nuts when he got so badly hurt in that final battle 😭 I literally reached for the screen several times and was right back to almost weeping 🥲 And someone tell me I wasn't the only one noticing the parallel in that scene with Wade standing in front of his unconscious body the way Tom did with Sonic in the first movie. That, PLUS Knuckles's epic comeback, and his retrieval of his own power?!?! EPIC!!!!
The ending was abrupt, sure, but the pure joy on Knuckles's face after everything as he jumped up to high five Wade was just too sweet. 🥹
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So yes, even though I would have loved just a little more, a return to Green Hills, a reunion with Maddie, Sonic, and Tails, I adored this show. It was a wild ride, full of laughs, tears, excited screeching, etc. 💙💛❤️ I don't care what anyone says, nothing will make me hate it.
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kuruk · 9 hours
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my dad's so mad he got served with papers to change custody of my little sister + have him pay child support and now he won't drive my other sister over here to visit anymore help. I wonder if my brother is refusing too he drives her pretty often.. My little sister already lives here so he's like Well you already have custody you just want to ruin my ljfe.. But like she doesn't that's why it needs to be changed on paper..
The first week my little sister moved in here full time, out of nowhere he suddenly texted and called pretending to freak out about how he needs to talk to her and doesn't believe she's the one texting him back and is worried about whether she's safe and that he's gonna send the cops to her house. which like when she lived there with my dad, she'd stay in her room all day because of her severe ocd and she'd waste away in bed all day in a dirty room and he'd never check on her like he's so absent all he does is sit in the same spot on the couch as trash literally piles around him. He doesn't want her living with him but he still wants the power of having custody and being able to use her as a threat by saying he could take her to the philippines with him if he wanted to because that's his right, and then when that's called out as a threat he's like "I didn't say I would do that, I'm just saying I can. That's something YOU would do" and acts like getting the custody officially changed isn't necessary and that his "permission" to have my sister stay here is enough when he still threatens to revoke it in anger so often.
he's trying to frame it like there's no reason for her to do this at all since she lives here but he's genuinely scary T_T he called the cops on me just to kick me out without notice and made my brother choke me on the ground until the cops got here and he told the cops I hated cops. when he called the cops on my mom months prior to that to try to commit her, the cops asked if my mom had a weapon and my dad was like I don't know.. :/ when he knew she didn't. after talking to the cops and getting her meds checked they were like I think he's just trying to get her institutionalized, and then they left. but with me I was crying after being choked so I couldn't talk and ended up having to go into a big hospital's psych unit. but like he's used the cops as a weapon before and it's just so scary that he threatens like that I feel like he really wants us killed
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ravabiye · 8 months
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did anyone else's parents get, weirdly mad at them for saying "hey" to get people's attention? was that an actual social norm, what happened to it
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deep-space-lines · 1 month
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Did I hit a raw nerve? Have I got a soft touch?
fuck it. lesbian mindflayers
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africanamermaid · 28 days
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Not me as somebody who crochets on the reg getting criticisms/unwanted comments about everything I make:
"You always use the same colors" :/
Me: can't help it I'm a thalassophile and therefore I must always use beige, khaki, turquoise, teal, aqua blues, whites of all shades. Let the coastal creations commence!
"Nice bag. You know, that looks perfect to use only for holidays like Easter"
Me: ...my coastal bag is to be used every time I feel like it. What are you talking about.
"Those oceanic colors don't match with your current outfit so don't use it."
Me: it's not about what looks nice TO YOU but what feels right and fun to use FOR ME.
"Why don't you add (whatever) to your creation. It'd look great if you add (whatever). And, how about next time, you actually use a leather bag bottom instead?"
Me: I don't want to.
"You sure can't take a comment or a slight criticism. Why are you like this?" :/
Me: you sure can't mind your business.
"Why are you doing 2 projects at once. Finish one and start the other I don't get it."
Me: oh you sweet summer child ohohoho...you just don't understand the mind of a crocheter do ya?
"You know, if you make something for somebody it sure won't be coastal themed or whatever. You have to try something different."
Me: who said I'm making anyone ANYTHING? They don't want to pay the correct price for a hand-made creation so that won't be happening. Anyway, ONTO THE COASTAL THEMED SCARF!
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Jason: *just vibing, thinking his thoughts*
Bruce: What?
Jason: What do you mean what?
Bruce: You were smiling
Jason: Am I not allowed to be happy?
Bruce: You are, but that was just, like, an evil smile
Jason: *offended, turning to Dick* Bruce thinks I have an evil smile
Bruce: I don't think you have an evil smile, just that particular smile looked evil
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nudibutch · 7 days
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i was finally able to have the house to myself for a bit today... brought all my dirty dishes out of my room and was able to tidy up a little bit without feeling weird
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silenthillbunni · 2 months
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📓🖊️🧸
#i feel so lonely now bc i have no one to talk to sksksk#my sisters gets mad whenever i try to talk 2 mom and she just slammed doors nd got irritated at me#nd my mom is so stressed nd in a bad mood so she just got annoyed when i tried saying smth to her#so ig i should just vent to my bestfriend beloved diary confidant thats been here for me for 5yrs<3333#anywayyy today was rough.. i woke up w a headache after 3hrs of sleep :((#but still had to get up nd get ready nd eat boxed mashed potatoes for breakkyy 🤢🤮 (it's so gross after eating it everyday lol)#then w my hunchback nd achy stomach i went to school. it was frustrating bc ppl r so fkn rude#they bumped into me at the bus nd i had to sit like a weirdo caging my left stomach side from everyone. had to elbow some dumb fkn guy bc he#pressed his backpack into my side. so i had to basically push it away from me lol he thought i was so weird. but move tf away asshole??????#got to school nd checked myself in the mirror nd i was so pale i look like absolute garbage its annoying :((#it was next to insufferable to endure class bc my head hurt so bad (it was the worst part i think) nd i couldnt sit up straight so my back#hurt so bad too sksksks :<#but i managed to write a little but on my assignment#then i left a bit earlier bc i couldnt stand it anymore i was feeling so bad#wrnt to the library bc i had to return some books. could only carry two small ones tho so have to go back multiple times sksksk#felt soooo bad but ate some more disgusting mashed potatoes nd took a nap w an ice pack. took a migraine pill even if it upsets my stomach🤣#now a few hours later i feel better physically#buuuuuut im so miserable im not even kidding#idc if it sound pathetic or fatty but genuinely that moment w a cup of coffee nd a small chocolate treat everyday makes me feel sm better#like im not kidding!!!!! it does a lot for my peace of mind sksksk T-T#im so miserable bc i cant eat anything still im so hungry :((#and im weak. im pale. my skin's dry. it's itchy bc of malnutrition... i feel faint nd dizzy nd slow nd just not good at all#im so frustrated i hate this sm i wanna feel strong and healthy!! i dont wanna be constantly hungry. i wanna go to the gym nd go for walks#i wanna be able to sit up straight nd not get back pain!!!#i know i know it's only been 8 days since surgery and it takes time to heal i get it..... :(#but theres just too much going on and im so sick and tired of it all#mostly i just wanna be able to eat and feel strong bc i feel so weak nd i miss food so much sksksksk
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beansprean · 2 years
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sometimes you get diagnosed with ADHD as an adult which finally makes your mom actually listen to what ADHD actually is and that she didn't cure it by making me do 100 jumping jacks as a kid when I got too hyper and then she realizes that she may have it too
And then you both realize that like 70% of the family probably also has adhd and that's why we are all Like That
#adhd#not art#like???? my moms side of the family were always weird to everyone but us#so informal and go with the flow and peppy but cycle through hobbies like toilet paper#never any drama bc we forget that we got mad and just get over it and were generally nice to people#we never learned to set boundaries with other people bc we all had invisible understood nd boundaries#and just didnt ask each other weird questions#like turns out we r just a super nd family???? but it makes sense???#my 2 cousins were diagnosed as kids but they were the only ones that was when adhd was starting to be understood as a childhood disability#but you only got diagnosed if u were getting bad grades etc so me and my sister got overlooked and everyone else was too old#but DEF my granny has combined like me and my mom has hyperactive type and probably my uncle as well#and my great aunt bipolar i wouldnt be surprised if she had comorbidities her daughter idk tho#great grandparents hard to say but i wouldn't be surprised and time will tell with cousins kids#would not be surprised to see some autism in there im sure my sis on the spectrum and i may be too but with adhd its hard to differentiate#anyway this is a v personal post but its kinda crazy to look back and be like huh#thats why the fam dynamic is so different from everyone elses#we dont talk to each other for years but relationships dont deteriorate in our heads so nbd#now my dads side....my dad does have a lot of adhd symptoms as well as his dad#plus Alzheimers runs thru there which has a slight predilection for adhd anyway#why would a bunch of intelligent chatty anxious and kind people choose to live in the middle of nowhere and have silly hobbies#why neurodivergency my friend#ANYWAY the culture shock of moving away from that as a child and my parents remarrying neurotypicals who didnt understand the dynamics#dunno if it was the southern thing or the nt thing but turns out the normal way i always interacted with my parents#was seen by others as deeply disrepectful mean teenager nonsense that should be culled#shout out to the nd kids with nd parents who just spoke to each other like adults and played with each other like kids#this is TOO MANY TAGS thats how u know the vyvanse kicked in#personal
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boxwinebaddie · 2 months
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NINNAAAA WHATS SPCD STAND FOR??
oh, it's not that exciting, it's actualy awful. i mentioned it towards the tail end of chapter five of rm. it's basically what cartman used to call kyle when they were growing up. a really cruel fucked up nickname.
the s.p.c.d,
or rather,
the south park city dump. :(
the sp boys used to be fucking horrible to kyle because cartman ruled their elementary/middle school. and when cartman and the boys saw kyle in the hallway they were like "what are you doing here, broflovski? trash day's tomorrow" or omg whenever he walked ANYWHERE they made the "Beep! Beep! Beep!" trash truck noises, but worst of all was that they used to dump out...Full Trashcans On Him. like spoiled milk, rotted food stuffs, glass bottles that werent put in recycling, crushed aluminum cans that cut his cheeks, all kinds of awful, foul smelling sludge...sigh. :/ ily so much baby jersey.
also, if you want to cry extra hard, i think that being covered in all that disgusting lunchroom trash, feeling it soak thru his shirt, stink down to the skin, pool around his shoes, get buried in his hair -- just feeling that dirty and disgusting and Unclean was one of the factors that made his ocd so severe and it's a large part as to why he takes scorching showers and rubs his skin raw bc especially if he smells something weird or its trash day, he gets triggered & has to SCRUB.
but anygays! you bet your ass that tiny lil stan was giving them ALL the business rippin around on his bike brandishing his hockey stick like a big sword, running them out of town and back to their mommas crying and screaming bloody murder all in that giant wayne gretsky *ravenstan vc* yersey...they were SCARED, lolllll!!!
which is a very interesting juxtaposition to sweet, gentle stan very lovingly picking all the food debris out of his kyles beautiful curly whirly hair before marching him over to the bathroom where while kyle showers, stan always sits on the toliet bc their running joke is that kyle might drown ( yes yersey also can't swim ) while stan listens to rock n colors his nails in w/ sharpie or stolen nail polish from shell.
and he's just like "dude, Fuck them, kyle! those fkn gilipollas are just mad because theyre all total perros and you're the most handsome guy in school, hands down." wHICH? AAA??? tbf stan does say shit like that all the time & Means It bc ravenstan has loved jers from the moment he Heard him but kyle thinks he's fuckin w/ him
bc haha!
very fun joke, stan! hit on the weird, overweight, clunky, awkward, nerdy loser boy to make him feel better about himself! great joke, bro!
bUT ITS NOT A JOKE, BESTIE!!!!
HE WANTS TO KISS YOU SO BAD!!!!!!!!
not them both bein secretly and painfully in love with each other but convinced that acting on their feelings would ruin their friendship/be unrequited and both of them being like "he is perfect, what would he want with a fuckin Loser like me?" :/ </3 WERE IN HELL!!!
regardless of thinking it was a joke, it totally made kyle blush, my rosecea king and stan was sooo nervous like oh my god, you are SO stupid, stanley marsh!!!!! guapo??? gUAPO BITCH??!!!! ARE U ACTUALLY INSANE!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU??!!!
i love nervous ass tiny stan with his massive universe sized crush on kyle broflovski that he carries around in his black jansport backpack at all times...along with the weight of the world, ofc. we know this.
but anyways..off topic.
closing thoughts?
fuck you fartman.
-uncle nina, tiny but big baby jersey kyle defense club
( don't touch my sweet son!!! MY BABY!!!!! )
p.s. i'm sorry i just started making new sections without warning. i wanted a way to post about what the boys looked or acted like during different periods of their lives -- so like, satana ( which is what stans mom called him ) refers to the period of time before the fire and kyle's 'the s.p.c.d.' section also refers to that period of time.
it's cool you guys are so perceptive tho! i hope you like them <333 you're always welcome to ask me questions about them xx
#the spcd nickname always makes me want to cry#i love you baby jersey kyle he is my angel#the world was so cruel to him#just for being fat too like#everyone who has ever hurt jersey can go hell right after they meet with me and i beat the living shit out of them...til they Die#stan was mad over protective too and stan was weird but he had Clout from being pretty so he was like IF I SEE THAT SHIT AGAIN ITS OVER#and then goes to lovingly tend to kyle like dude im so sorry you dont deserve this shit look im gonna tell their moms#and theyre gonna get so busted and have to pay you back for al your clothes...then we pretend to hit the gap and go to good will instead#and use the rest to buy tokens at the arcade or buy the new mario game and see who can finish a pizza faster its me btw#theyre in love ur honor like why didnt i give them a chance like they were...so married#ALSO AN ANON ASKED ME ABOUT BALLET KY#YES JERSEY TOOK BALLET it wasn't his idea it was an accident bc they were marking electives#and ballet was RIGHT next to basketball and then basketbal got full and sheila was like I ALREADY BOUGHT YOU SHOES UR GOING#and like at first it was really awkward but i think kyle actually really liked the structure of ballet and when u dance beautifully#what he found is that no one had anything to say about his weight just that his pirouette was perfect it was freeing#he dropped it during the kyley b era#but picked it up again in college and its kind of a form of self harm and he fucks up his feet very badly trying to be perfect#also hes like fuck all those people who laughed at me im perfect now im fucking perfect i have to show them i have to be the best#sigh...kyle kyle kyle...ill elaborate on that more in one of the ballet kyle asks but kyle loves ballet and going to preformances#ice skating and dainty refined stuff which is cute bc theyre very nosm like jers on ice skates and stan w the hockey stick during winter
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guinevereslancelot · 3 days
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most fucked up thing at my new job is there's only zero calorie sweeteners at the coffee station in the break room. three different kinds of zero calorie sweetener but no regular sugar because the assumption is that literally everyone is on a diet?
#is this because its a job dominated by women in particular??? idk#that's so weird#like sorry i can taste the difference and i prefer naturally occurring sugar from nature how is that not even an option#drinking nasty bitter af coffee bc i am So Sleepy but i refuse to use artificial sweeteners#they Do taste different and they're not even good for you im not doing that lol#also they got mad at me for telling one of the parents that we took one of the kids temperature and it was 99 and he threw up a little#when his dad came to get him yesterday and all of the other teachers were nowhere to be found#they were like tou shouldnhave had colleen do that#ma'am colleen went home before that and so did you#i should have left already too but waited bc the ratio on the playground was bad#anyway i did NOT say he had a fever i said it was 99 and to talk to the teacher inside#but the dad didnt yalk to her clearly then went home and scared the mom that he had a fever and threw up so she texted my boss freaking out#i literally just said he threw up a little and we took his temperature and it was 99 and to talk to the other teacher#which was all true and there was no one else there to tell him#anyway#apparently the person who had my job before me was a wacko who scared the parents with fake medical information or something#but that is not my fault and nobody told me that or not to tell the parents anything medical until this morning#ugh#also my supervisor is kind of a weirdo#she wanted to show everyone ~cute~ pictures of animals she has killed while hunting???#and i said i didnt want to see#and she was like ~oh it's not dead yet in the picture~#like okay but its dead now???#she traps them first so its a cute little fox in a trap about to be killed 😭#like wtfff#i know trappong predators is a reality but why take pictures like ohhh so cute then kill it#THEN show everyone the cute pictures like yeah isnt he adorable i killed him btw <3#huh??????#she has a bobcat tail on her keychain too she was giving it to the teachers and kids to pet like ohhh its so soft <3
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isekyaaa · 4 months
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I was talking to my sister the other day about love languages and how for me, I rank low on Acts of Service and I was thinking how that like... portrays me as a selfish person. At least that's how I perceive it.
From a young age, I was taught that a good person does things for others. That a good person is self-sacrificing and always willing to help. However, while I was supposed to treat other people like that, I was never treated like that in return. Growing up, I remember having to do everything myself. Though my siblings were given help, that was a luxury never given to me. If I want something, I have to fight for it. I have to do it all myself. I'm not allowed help.
Being raised like that made me despise the idea of acts of service. To do things on your own is to grow as a person. You learn, you adapt, you improve. The more you help and baby someone, the more you hinder them. But it's also made me way more stingy with my time. I'm spending all of my time doing everything on my own that I don't have the time to work in the service of others. I want to spend my free time for me. I've done so much work already. Let me be lazy. Let me be selfish. I deserve it, don't I?
The worst part about people that rank high in acts of service is that they're so transactional about it. They act with the expectation that you'll act in return. They set themselves up for failure. They cannot comprehend that other people don't rank highly in it, so they'll use their acts of service to hold people hostage through guilt tripping, etc. "I did this for you, so why aren't you doing it for me?" It's a disgusting mindset that I absolutely hate. I hate it when people use this thinking against me to force me to act in a specific way.
Okay I got distracted with that last paragraph, but the fact that I don't rank high in acts of service often makes me feel guilty from time to time. I don't want to do things for others, even in my family. I don't want to. I'm selfish. I don't want to give up my time for them. I don't see the point in doing things for them out of my goodwill. I should be that way. I should be better. But I'm not. And I don't want to be.
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mentalmeles · 5 months
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I swear, one of these days I'm going to just snap and tear into one of/the majority of my coworkers bc I am SO sick and tired of their behavior
#today the newest girl messages me two hours before her shift and tells me she's going to be late#the time for her shift to start comes along and she messages me again saying she's going to be a bit later than she thought#at this point i'm like fine. whatever#30-40 minutes pass and i finally take my 30 minute lunch break#while i'm going she arrives at 4 (a whole hour late)#she clocks in and then proceeds to make a phone call#despite the literal owner telling her to end the call and come work she does not#he leaves and i tell her she has 5 minutes until she needs to hang up#5 minutes come and go and i tell her she needs to hang up now#i then had to tell her 3 or 4 more times before she finally did#and then she starts stalling and asking if she can call her mom or the boss or this and that and i tell her no each time#i also tell her that she doesn't get a 15 minute break bc at this point she was on the phone for a whole hour in addition to being late#but guess what this girl tries to do anyway!!! take a 15 minute break!!!#i confront her while she's trying to leave and she tries to lie and say that i told her she couldn't take a 30 minute break#she also tries to insist that she wasn't on her phone for an hour when i literally checked the time she clocked in#and the time i finally got her to come work#when she realizes i see through her bullshit she tries to say she's going to call the owner and ask if she can go home early#jokes on her but since he was gone that decision was up to me and i obviously told her no#she got mad at me ofc but i am just so fed up with this shit#my boss might put up with it but i have HAD IT!!!#legit going to tell him that we shouldn't allow phones anymore. period.#i hate to do that but at this point it's so much more trouble than it's worth with these kids#earth duty stuff#vent#negative
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manofmanymons · 1 month
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Top 5 boys that make me go *points* he's just like me fr fr
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lonely--seeker · 4 months
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My mom bought the ugliest ass little freak of a 3D printed alien, just because. It's supposed to be like, one of those phone holder thingies.
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