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#listening to the season again heheh

yourheartinyourmouth · 5 months

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just finished S3 of Mockery Manor from @longcatmedia and i am SCREAMING i was so so wrong!!!! but also NOT?!?!??

THAT MID-CREDITS BUMP!!!

will the soundtrack for S3 go up on bandcamp? i need to own Four Spurs at the very least.

Lindsay Sharman and Laurence Owen really outdid themselves this season. Hayley Evenett and the rest of the cast was excellent as always. <33

i can’t wait for S4, and whatever else this creative dream team has up their collective sleeve. <3

#mockery manor #long cat media #mockery manor my beloved #i have to go and see what the merch situation is w S3 #i want a map of Claytonville the way they released a map of Mockery Manor #love that this season focused on Bette #excited for S4 #seriously this whole team is so excellent together #keep up the great work y’all!!!#this season kept me guessing it really did #i was SO SURE abt who did it and then i was SO WRONG #listening to the season again heheh

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aliashborn · 5 months

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Oneshot 1: Tickle Fight (Jinx x male!reader)

(A/N: I write headcanons, oneshots, smut, fluff, etc for Arcane characters. But mostly for Jinx. Just put up a request and I'll write it.)

Warnings: nothing, just plot

Characters: Jinx x male reader

"Jinx, baby, I'm back!" Walking into the cave, you shouted your entrance. Having just returned with a takeout from Jericho's shop, you expected to hear loud music or the sound of Jinx crafting something. Or both. But instead, you were greeted with silence.

You hummed playfully. Moments like this weren't rare, but they were always fun. Things being quiet in your shared "room" with no sound always only meant one thing, Jinx wanted to play. Placing the food somewhere else, you walked in with a small smile :"Jinxie~? Babe, where are you~?

Gotcha!" You said, trying to catch her by surprise as you looked at a hiding spot. But to no avail. She wasn't there. The bluenette was quite sneaky and good at hiding when she wanted to. As you looked around, you didn't notice the pair of blue eyes mischievously stalking you.

"Gotcha!" You only did when it was too late. Jinx bounced on you from behind, causing you to stumble and fall with her on your back. "Jinx!" You laughed, looking back as she laughed a playful evil laughter, even though it was just adorable :"Mwahaha! You've been hunted, my love! And it's time for you to get eaten!"

As her mouth latched onto your neck, she nibbled playfully, causing you to burst into laughter at the tickling sensation :"Nom nom! You don't taste bad for dinner at all! Maybe I should add some seasoning to make you taste even better!"

Her teeth scraped against your neck. But she was careful enough for it to not cause any discomfort. Just feel ticklish enough to make you laugh. Laugh that laughter that sounded like music to her ears.

"Jinx! Hahaha J-Jinx, stohohohop! Pleahehehese, baby!" You squealed between laughter, hands locked and pinned down by her like the rest of your body as she continued her assault on your neck :"Nohohoho, Jihihihihinx, please!"

But she didn't listen. At least not until a bit later where she had you panting and giggling on the ground. Body weak and limp on the ground, she laid on top of you. A happy and loving smile on her face as she looked at your flushed face, her long blue braids falling on your sides :"I love you." She said happily :"Love you so, so, sooo much!"

You looked up at her, smiling fondly at her. A mischievous light appearing in your teared up eyes, caused by the loving tickles :"I love you too. I love you more." Causing her to glare playfully :"Oh, no, no, no, no, we're not having this argument again. I love you more!"

"Nope, I love you more."

"I said, I love you more!"

"Nope, me more."

"No, me love you more!"

"Nuh uh, me more."

"No, me love thou more!"

"No, me."

"Me more!"

"Nope, me."

"Me!"

"Me."

"Me!"

"You."

"No, you!"

"Sure, I mean it's the truth."

"Wait, shit!" She cursed, realizing her mistake. Pouting down at you, she gently pinched your cheek :"That's not fair! You cheated." Causing you to snicker smugly :"Not my problem I'm smart." But her evil smile stopped you :"We'll see about that, smartass!

And with that, her vicious fingers descended onto your sides. Mercilessly tickling you as your laughter started once again. But this time, even harder with how her cruel fingers moved as she laughed evilly :"You think you're so smart, huh?! Who's the smart one now! Who loves who more, huh?! You better answer correctly if you want this to stop, sweet cheeks!"

"Nohohoho! I lohahahahave you mohohohore!" You laughed, causing Jinx to laugh too :"Then I guess you don't want this to stop! Say it! Say it right now if you don't want me to tickle you!" As tears formed in your eyes, falling down gently, your laughter barely let you disagree. Seeing the chance, you quickly grabbed her braid beside you. Pulling and making her squeal in shock as you pinned her down, still giggling :"Y-you hehehe... you like tickling so much? Then let's see how much you like getting tickled!"

"Noooohohoho!" Her laughter immediately echoed around the room, trying to fight back as your skilled fingers danced around her exposed stomach :"Stohohohop! Baby, pleahehehese!" She tried to grab your hands, but you quickly grabbed her wrists with one hand instead. Pinning them above her head, your free hand continued its assault as your mouth joined. Blowing raspberries on her stomach, you enjoyed her beautiful laughter :"Babyhehehehe! Stohohohop!"

"Only if you admit it!" You laughed evilly, going even rougher and making her scream in laughter :"Neveheheher!" Causing you to laugh in playful sadism :"Then I guess you don't want this to stop!" But she wasn't willing to admit defeat. If she was going to back down from any arguments, this one wasn't one of them.

In the end, you stopped tickling her without obtaining victory. As you both laughed at each other, you smiled :"Fine, we both love each other more. How about that?" With a look of thoughtfulness, she finally smiled :"Alright, fine. I'll settle with that for now. But next time, I'm definitely making you admit that I love you more!"

Causing you to chuckle in amusement :"Fine, fine." When you let her go, her hands immediately circled you before pulling you into a tight, loving hug. And then flipping you over to lay straight on your chest. Smiling lovingly with her feet behind her dancing in the air, she kissed your lips :"I love you." Making you smile and kiss her back :"I love you too, baby. Very, very much.”

#jinx x reader #jinx x male reader #jinx arcane #jinx league of legends #jinx x y/n

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theragethatisdesire · 9 months

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much ado about nothing chapter 6 - plug!eren x reader - 18+!!!

DISCLAIMER: this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. minors and ageless blogs, please do not read below the cut.

ummmmm HIII so sorry i know i still owe you guys a million drabbles and i haven't been posting as much but this chapter is just chock-full of drama and i'm so excited to share it bc hehehe it's a rollercoaster. also we should def stop listening to sasha. sneaky posting; have fun babies!!!! i cannot WAIT to hear your thoughts

specific cws: alcohol use, violence (like fist-fighting level not insane), mentions of drugs, swearing, incredibly awkward tension lol

“The course of true love never did run smooth.” A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare (Act I, Scene 1)

You’ve done a lot of partying in your days, but you never thought a hangover could float over your shoulders for damn near two weeks. Then again, maybe that rancid taste in your mouth is regret instead of the practical gallons of liquor you’d guzzled that night.

Historia tells you to delete the evidence, have a glass of wine with your friends, focus on your studies, put meaning back into the happy distractions that make up life. Sasha tells you to suck it up, download Tinder, do something other than wallow in your bed with nothing on but the fairy lights along your ceiling. Ymir tells you men aren’t worth embarrassing yourself for, maybe start swinging the other way, that she knows a few very pretty single ladies.

You meet all of their advice with a slow nod, sometimes a chuckle, put your head down, and go about your business, letting the shame follow you around like a little rain cloud from building to building around campus. Even your students have noticed something’s making you tick; Falco and Gabi left a package of Crumbl cookies in your office the other day, and for the first time, Zofia has begun to raise her hand in class. It’s heartwarming, really, but it doesn’t solve your problem.

Problems would be the better term for it. To start, there was your royal fuck-up with Eren. You had over-indulged and gotten a little too flirty to be “friends”, sure, it happens, but something had snapped in you when you saw Eren with that leggy blonde hanging all over him at the club.

Breeze. Even wearing naught but a skirt and some thin tights with the early winter wind whipping around your legs, just the thought of her name makes your blood boil. She was perfect, all bouncy and easygoing and cool, hippie clothes. To be fair, she was the one with the true claim on Eren; you had dug your own grave, far too confident in your ability to be just friends with someone so…so Eren.

Your friendship had been growing closer and closer by the passing day before that night, texting at nearly every minute of the day and spending time together wherever you could fit it in your full schedule. You had made plans to bake Christmas cookies together, even despite Eren’s protests that Christmas was a “capitalistic hellhole of a holiday season”, had acted out your favorite Shakespeare scenes in your pajamas, much to Eren’s amusement, and had made a habit of staying up late into the night watching and rewatching your favorite animes, heatedly debating characters. It had been butterfly-inducing, dizzying, perfect. Until you had indulged in one too many shots and humiliated yourself, that is.

Seeing Breeze all over Eren had made you realize the severity of your mistake trying to keep Eren in your life, realize the warm feeling blooming in your chest every time he grinned at you, all teeth and his little chin dimple, was decidedly much more than a platonic appreciation for a new friend. It turned out that you’d been right from the start; you weren’t his type, and to make matters worse, his actual taste in women had been thrust in your face unexpectedly.

When you had awoken the next morning, debating on whether to fall back asleep immediately or dash to the toilet, Historia had greeted you with a sorry smile, a cup of coffee, and a quiet word of advice to look through your phone. Knowing your drunken self, you pulled up your phone calls first, wanting to make sure you hadn’t accidentally Facetimed your mom to tell her how much fun you were having or something cringe-worthy of the sort. But no, of course it had to be much worse than that.

There was a phone call– to Eren. Your call log had recorded a one minute and thirty-six second phone call between you and Eren, one you obviously didn’t remember making.

“Please tell me you were with me when I called Eren,” you groan, so naive, “did I completely embarrass myself?”

Historia blushes. “Well, he didn’t answer, if it’s any consolation–”

“Oh, thank god–”

“But that didn’t exactly stop you,” Historia fiddles with the edge of her t-shirt, “you left him a voicemail.”

Even through your throbbing headache, you shoot right up out of bed at that. “What?! What did I say?”

“I don’t know,” Historia moans woefully, putting her hands over her face, “I’m sorry, I tried to stop you, but you ran off as soon as you started talking. By the time I caught up to you, you were already hanging up.”

“So, there’s a voicemail from drunk me on Eren’s phone, and neither of us have any idea what it says?”

“Correct.”

“My life fucking sucks.”

“It’s about to get a whole lot worse,” Historia says, throwing your sheets back and snuggling beside you in the bed, burrowing her face in your shoulder, “check your texts.”

And oh, had it gotten worse. Your drunken, foolish text sat in your outbox, unanswered, unread, and inexcusable. Six months later and you were right back where you started, begging a ghost of a man to explain why he couldn’t love you.

> hi luke, i’m sorta ficked up, but i misz you. why did yoi never call me???? you owe me at leasttg that. a fcking explanation,.

Storming through campus, coat tucked around your shoulders against the biting chill, you wince at the memory. You haven’t deleted the unanswered text yet, keeping it stale in your phone as a reminder of what happens when you get too attached to people you know aren’t good for you.

You thought you’d be more heartbroken over the text to Luke and its lack of an answer, but surprisingly, you’re not. It’s Eren haunting your thoughts, Luke’s just the placeholder for all of your anger at this point. Eren isn’t to blame for all of this, you are, and that’s why you can’t bring yourself to face him, can’t bring yourself to answer any of the hesitant texts he’s sent you since that god-awful night.

You’re not in college anymore, you have to keep reminding yourself. You’re twenty-four, and you’d like to think you’re past the phase of your life where you’re handing your heart out to anyone that passes like it’s a Costco sample. You aren’t even sure if you want Luke anymore at this point, if you could even speak to him if you bumped into him these days. He had, admittedly, treated you like dirt, wrenched your heart out from your chest and left it on the sidewalk to collect dust. At least you can hate him, hate what he did to you, hate that you’re stuck on him like a broken record skipping to the same chorus every few weeks.

You can’t hate Eren, though. You can be disappointed in him for entertaining his terrible ex-girlfriend, not aloud of course because he hadn’t actually mentioned her to you himself, but you can do it internally. Even that isn’t enough to make you feel better; not only had he not trusted you, not felt safe or comfortable enough with you to share the skeletons in his closet, but he was likely zooming full-speed down a dead-end street, the way Sasha tells the story. Your heart aches for him out of a painful mixture of pining and fervent concern.

Your only solution so far has been to dive headfirst into your coursework and your students; it hasn’t done much to distract you, but with finals on the horizon, it’s not the worst method of coping you’ve come up with in your days.

Your newly invigorated dedication to your work and your courses are the cause of you dragging yourself across campus to 104, desperate for caffeine and practically a corpse after two weeks of near-constant self-shaming keeping you up at night.

The smell of the coffee shop, earthy and warm, hits you almost as hard as the blasting heat inside, and you practically slouch upon entering, the weight of the cozy atmosphere cocooning you like a warm blanket. If there’s one place that will always feel like a hug, it’s 104 Beans, your coffee shop of choice (and obligation, considering the small size of your campus) for the last six years.

Pieck, your favorite barista, greets you in her typical dreamy manner. “Hi love, same as usual?”

“Hey Pieck,” you greet her with a weary smile. As you dig around in your bag for your wallet, the extent of your exhaustion versus the amount of work you have left to do surfaces in your brain. “Actually…no, not my usual. Can I get a quad shot Americano?”

Pieck pauses where she’s scribbling onto a paper cup with a Sharpie, eyes flitting back up to you in disbelief. “A quad shot Americano?”

“A quad shot Americano.”

“Jesus,” Pieck sighs, eyes wide, “work’s that rough, huh? Black coffee not going to cut it?”

“The shakes will be worth it,” you confirm, swiping your card through the machine.

“Can I please make it a cappuccino then? You’re going to need something creamy to get all that espresso down,” Pieck looks back up at you, eyes pleading.

“Fine,” you sigh, “but–”

“Almond milk, I know,” Pieck winks at you, sliding your cup down the assembly line of baristas working amongst the hissing of the espresso machine and the pleasant, folky music floating from the speakers. “We’re a little busy, so give me five and I’ll bring it over to you.”

You smile gratefully and collect your things, turning to scout out what’s hopefully a quiet table in the corner, when a pair of arms tossed around your shoulders stops you. The familiar scent of fruity perfume tickles your nose, and you slump against the tight grip in relief.

“You made it out of the house!” Sasha’s eyes glow with pride, as if you’d just run a marathon.

“It’s not like I’m a hermit,” you roll your eyes, “I have class five days a week.”

“You don’t go anywhere besides class or your house though, so you still get participation points,” Sasha grins, shaking your shoulders, “how are you feeling?”

“Well…”

Sasha’s expression crumples. “Still that bad, huh?”

“The Luke thing was pathetic of me, but honestly, it’s not haunting me as much as I thought it would,” you admit, pausing for a moment to allow Sasha to grab her coffee from the barista when her name is called, “the one thing that’s really sticking with me is the Eren issue.”

“Like, the voicemail? Or Breeze?”

“Both. I would give anything to know what that voicemail said, but whatever was going on between us aside, I just hope he’s okay, y’know? With Breeze back in the picture and everything.”

Sasha bites into her bottom lip and glances around the coffee shop, checking every face at every table. You know that face; she’s hiding something.

“What?”

“What?” Sasha cocks her head innocently. You nearly smack her.

“You’re not telling me something.”

“Uh…okay, yeah, I’m not, but I’m not sure if I should. I mean, you’re actually out of the house–”

“I leave my house plenty!”

“You know what I mean,” Sasha scoffs, “it’s just…if you’re feeling better, I don’t want to throw you back into the deep end.”

You have no words for that, absolutely despising the way that she is completely correct. Whatever information lies behind Sasha’s bitten lip could either make you feel a hundred times better or a hundred times worse, and you’re stuck debating on whether you should gamble or not when Sasha makes the decision for you.

“Fine, you wore me down,” she sighs.

“I didn’t even say anything,” you point out, raising an eyebrow.

“You don’t have to,” Sasha says, annoyed, “you have this, like, fucking puppy dog look. Makes me sick. Get your coffee, I’ll find a table, and we can talk.”

Like clockwork, the moment Sasha steps away, Pieck grabs your attention and hands your coffee over along with an extra hot cup half-full of steamed almond milk. You look at her questioningly, and she merely shrugs.

“That’s a lot of espresso. I know you’re in, like, your depressed writer phase right now, but I figured a little extra milk would come in handy.”

“You’re the best,” you smile at her affectionately, thinking absentmindedly that you should invite her out to Scout’s sometime. Before she can respond, Pieck’s gaze lands on something just over your shoulder. You can smell him even before you turn around, musky cologne and a little hint of weed. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

“Hey Pieck. Usual?” His throaty timbre cuts through the thick air, sharp as a knife. Pieck nods politely and gets to work on his coffee, forgoing a trip to the cash register. That tracks; Pieck’s hooded eyes are bloodshot more often than not.

“Excuse me,” you mutter, trying to sneak around him, but Eren’s quicker than you, side-stepping to cut you off.

“Hey stranger,” he smiles down at you, but it’s tense, nervous, “trying to run off on me?”

“Didn’t even realize that was you, sorry,” you lie, offering him a thin smile in return. You spot Sasha gaping at you across the cafe, waving her arms wildly and mouthing What the fuck?. You can’t help but feel similarly.

“It’s been awhile, how are you?”

“M’fine, just really busy with school.” God, you hate this, this awkward small talk barely parsing its way through the jungle of things left unsaid between you two. “You?”

“Fine,” Eren looks around awkwardly, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Good,” you speak directly into your coffee, unable to stomach the emerald green peering down at you.

“You know,” Eren’s words come out quite like he can’t believe he’s saying them, “I kinda thought you were avoiding me.”

“Did you?” Your voice is caught in your throat, coming out in a pathetic squeak. Has he heard the voicemail? The startling turn the conversation’s taken must be visible all over your face, because Sasha’s flailing arms beckoning you over to the table grow more urgent.

“You haven’t texted me back, haven’t seen you in a couple weeks,” Eren’s incredibly focused on his shoes, kicking one Vans sneaker idly back and forth on the floor and making a squeaking sound, “so yeah, sort of.”

“I’m busy,” you deadpan, praying to any god you can remember the name of that you’ll just disintegrate right where you stand. Eren meets your eyes again, smirks disbelievingly.

“You said that.”

Something in his tone annoys you, something about his insinuation that he knows you’re blatantly lying, that he’s teasing you over your embarrassment, ignites a little flame in your chest. You scowl at him.

“I mean, you must be pretty busy too.”

“Why’s that?”

“Breeze just got back into town, didn’t she?” No going back now. Eren’s face blanches for a moment, features growing pale, but he manages to school his face back into that nonchalant pout that you want to slap right off his face.

“Historia told you?” He doesn’t sound surprised; in face, he sounds almost expectant, like he knew you’d find out at some point. It stakes the embers burning in your chest.

“She’s my best friend, so yeah.” This feels like an argument. It shouldn’t be an argument, but your clipped tone is pushing it in that direction. You’ve spent the last two weeks reminding yourself that you have no claim on Eren, no reason to be hurt or upset, but here you are, feeling that familiar rush of anger coursing through your veins.

“I mean, we haven’t been hanging out or anything, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Who said I was worried?”

Eren’s eyebrows knit together, a little frown playing at his mouth. “I don’t know, I mean–”

“Look, Sasha’s waiting for me,” you point over Eren’s shoulder to the little two-top table, where Sasha has stilled within the blink of an eye, shooting Eren an innocent smile and a little wave. “I’d love to catch up, but maybe another time.”

“It was good seeing you.” Eren looks confused, albeit, a little bit hurt, and you hate it. Why is that so much worse, even worse than the sight of him with Breeze hanging off of his arm? His little pout puts a needle through your ballooning anger, and you deflate, sighing.

“I’ll see you around, I’m sure.”

“Yeah,” Eren takes his coffee from Pieck and ambles towards the door, sparing you one last glance over his shoulder. Unwilling to hold his eyes any longer, you scurry to your table, just having realized that Pieck forgot to put a coffee sleeve around your cup and that it’s been burning your hand for the last several minutes.

“Ow! Shit!” You practically crash land across from Sasha, dropping your cups in synchronicity and shaking your red palms around in the air to cool them down.

“What was that?” Sasha hisses, leaning across the table so viciously that your drinks nearly topple over.

“He just showed up!”

“You didn’t have to talk to him.”

“I didn’t try to. He just, like, materialized behind me and started talking. What was I supposed to do? Run away?”

“Little shit,” Sasha swears, glaring at the door as if her anger can shoot through it like a laser beam, cut Eren down where he’s surely almost a block down the street by now, “what did he say?”

“He asked if I’ve been avoiding him," you say, twirling your wooden coffee stirrer through your drink idly and trying to look as if your heart’s not still beating at what’s sure to be a dangerous rate.

“Well, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, but I wasn’t about to tell him that. He got all smug about it,” you scoff, the replayed scene of Eren’s self-assured smirk wiping off of his face bringing you a little bit of petty satisfaction, “until I brought up Breeze.”

Sasha’s eyes grow wide, and she looks around the coffee shop again, as if Eren or Breeze might come popping out of one of the large potted plants in the corners. “That’s actually what I wanted to tell you. What did he say about it?”

“What did you hear?” You narrow your eyes at her, and she narrows hers back.

“You first.”

“He didn’t say much, just looked really surprised that I brought her up. Said they haven’t been hanging out.”

“That’s bullshit,” Sasha snorts, rolling her eyes. Something in your chest that had begun to glimmer, something akin to hope, feels like it just got a bucket of ice-water poured over it. You cock your head, furrow your brows.

“How would you know?”

“Because Hitch and I grabbed some coffee–”

“Hitch? I thought that was a–”

“Okay, don’t crucify me, I know,” Sasha holds her hands up defensively, “it was supposed to be a one night stand, but…I don’t know. She’s cool.”

“Cool?” Even through your desperation for anything Eren-related after a two week drought, you smile knowingly at her. Sasha’s not hard to read, especially when her face goes bright red from chin to forehead.

“Yes,” she hisses, “cool. Anyway, we came by a few days ago, and Eren was here. With Breeze.”

“I mean, I expected as much.”

You’re lying, you’re so lying. The only consolation you’ve had over the last two weeks that you’re not a complete moron is the hope that maybe, just maybe, Eren’s just as forlorn as you, laying around and wishing his phone would buzz with your name on it, wishing you’d pop up at his door with a bag of popcorn ready for movie night. Instead, your worst suspicions have been confirmed, and not only is Eren very much involved with Breeze again, but he had lied straight to your face about it. Ouch.

“They weren’t like, holding hands or anything. Honestly, it looked like they were fighting.”

“Well, what did Hitch say about it?” You don’t even know if you want to know, but with your brain short-circuiting inside your skull, your mouth has free reign to seek out information that will be about as soothing as lemon juice on a papercut.

“Eren won’t talk to any of them about her,” Sasha burns her tongue on her coffee and sucks in a sharp breath, “not even Armin, apparently. She said he’s been moody lately.”

“Wonder why,” you mumble, mulling all of this new information over in your head. Breeze is bad for him, makes him crazy, you already know that. But you didn’t think it would start this soon– you feel like if anything, he should be ecstatic that his long-lost love has finally come back to him. And he can stop trying to replace her, your brain adds helpfully, only doubling the watery ache swelling in your chest.

“Who cares?” Sasha rips open a granola bar, biting into it and continuing to speak with her mouth full. “That’s why you’ve got to stop avoiding him.”

“Huh? That seems like the opposite–”

“No,” Sasha cuts you off, an air of authority in her normally chipper voice, “you’re not going to cower in the corner just because Eren’s back with his shitty ex girlfriend–”

“It’s not just because of Breeze,” you correct her, “it’s because of that voicemail. I have no idea what I said. There’s a lot that’s contributing to my self-induced isolation, trust me.”

“Regardless,” Sasha mouths around another bite of her granola bar, “the only thing that will make you feel better is being around him.”

“That sounds a little contradictory–”

“Trust me,” Sasha interrupts you again, “the best way to make a guy come around is to be up in his face, flaunting how hot and single you are, and to not give him an ounce of your attention. It’s a tried and true method, I promise.”

It turns out that you are a beacon for those with bad ideas, evidently, because later that night, you’ve ended up at Scout’s, cuddled up against the bar with Sasha despite Historia’s fervent protests. If Historia shows up later, just to “check in” (read: see what’s come of Sasha’s terrible plan), you won’t be surprised. She’s prone to being the mom friend and the harbinger of gossip, but she hasn’t shown face quite yet. It’s just you, Sasha, and a handful of regulars, sipping unreasonably cold beers and trying to act as if the early December chill hasn’t rattled you to your bones.

“This is a stupid idea,” you murmur against the lip of your bottle, trying not to seem as unnerved as you are, even after an hour of waiting and sipping. Sasha scoffs beside you, picking through your near-empty basket of peanut shells in search of a full pod.

“It’s not. He’ll be here.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad you dragged me out. It only took a week for me to start missing this place,” you run a thoughtful hand along the varnished wooden bartop, “but I’m just still not sure about this whole seeing-Eren-on-purpose thing.”

Before Sasha can answer, the door swings open to reveal the man in question: Eren, accompanied by Armin and Connie, as always, and sporting his standard uniform. Black hoodie, slouchy khaki pants that are tightened around the ankles, and his beat-up Vans.

You nearly sigh into your drink at how delicious he looks, only stopping when the little voice in your head reminds you that the voicemail you’d left him exists. Friends– no, strangers now? The concept of labeling your bizarre, gray-areas-only relationship with Eren brings a chuckle up your throat, one that spills onto the bar.

You can feel him watching you, but to your simultaneous surprise and disappointment, he gives you space, sidling up to the bar a few seats down from where you and Sasha are occupying a couple of bar stools. When Connie throws up a cheerful hand in greeting to you, you tentatively wave back, only for Armin to grab Connie’s attention and turn him toward the bar.

“Ha!” Sasha says triumphantly, looking at you with her eyes glowing like you’re supposed to have reached a revelation of some sort. “See?”

“Did you plot this with Connie?” You narrow your eyes in suspicion.

“No, I’m just a genius, that’s all.”

“I feel like your theory is being proven wrong, not right. He’s not even sitting near us.”

“Because you have the upper hand!” Sasha grins.

“The upper hand?”

“Yeah, he’s giving you some space so you can make the first move, get what you want out of him.”

“And what do I want out of him?” You nearly growl in your frustration, feeling silly sitting exactly four barstools down from Eren with him running through your mind as if he isn’t close enough to just hop up and hug. It’s a genuine question more than a rhetorical one; you’re not even sure what you expect out of him anymore. Another fuck? A fancy date night? A lifetime worth of radio silence, as if Eren isn’t the person you’ve connected better with than nearly anyone else in your romantic history?

Sasha’s brows furrow. “Don’t you know?”

“No! That’s what I was trying to tell you!”

“Oh,” Sasha frowns, rubs her chin, “we should have figured that part out before we came, I guess.”

“Sasha!” You whisper-hiss, ever mindful of what you’re sure to be prying ears only a few feet away. “So you have no plan?”

Sasha stumbles, stutters, and eventually, flushes bright red with a shrug. “Okay, fine, I have no plan. But at least it’s something to break up your routine of laying in bed eating chips and moping around the library.”

“You’re such a bitch.” You roll your eyes, but you don’t mean it, not really. Regardless of how things stand, at the very least you can sneak little glances at Eren, take in how good he looks– no, you correct yourself firmly. You hopped off that train of your own accord, and you’re better for it.

With some verbal manhandling, you goad Sasha into a lull of small talk, classes, anything that comes to mind. A pair of eyes finds you, not the emerald that keeps you up at night, but a pair of hazel old-and-new eyes draw to you, and you can feel the scratch of an unwelcome gaze on your skin.

“Floch’s here,” you state the obvious, sipping your drink and giving no physical indication that you’ve noticed him, staring straight ahead as you mutter to Sasha.

“Christ, this was not a good idea,” Sasha groans, face-palming.

“Wow, I sure wish that someone had suggested this was a bad idea, wouldn’t that have been nice?”

“Shut up,” Sasha says, peeking warily over her shoulder, “I think that’s Hitch in the corner, too.”

You frown, confused at the hunched, anxious change in her posture. “Why are you being weird? Go say hey.”

“I’m not abandoning you!”

“Oh, shut it. Why are you really being weird?”

“I, uh…” Sasha twirls her beer around on the counter, blushing, “I haven’t texted her back in like, four or five days.”

“Sasha! You like her, I can tell. What’s gotten into you?”

“It was supposed to be a one-night thing,” Sasha moans, letting her face fall dramatically into her hands, “and then it was movie nights and coffee and just…way beyond casual hooking up. I like her, but…I don’t know! I panicked.”

You chew on her admission for a second, selfishly comparing Sasha’s situation to your own. Was that what you were doing with Eren? No, surely not, but was that what he was doing with you? You knew he had loved Breeze, that she had wrecked him, but maybe…just maybe some small part of you wants to hope that he’s moved on, that the coffee shop sighting was a fluke.

You shoo Sasha in Hitch’s direction, demanding she run over to apologize and make nice with Hitch, partially to save Sasha’s first shot at a real relationship in years and partially because you want to stew alone with your thoughts. Before you can get too deep into your black hole of what ifs, a familiar presence is sliding into Sasha’s seat, grinning lewdly.

You sigh; it was only a matter of time before he sought you out.

“What do you want, Forster?”

“Last name only? Ouch,” Floch places a hand over his heart, drumming the fingers of his other hand on the countertop. You recognize his demeanor immediately: pupils blown wide, buzzing to the brim with nervous energy. Floch’s always dabbled in party drugs, part of why you could only stand to be around him in small doses back when you were hooking up.

“Are you coked out right now?” Mindful of Levi’s hovering presence behind the bar, you keep your voice to a low hiss.

“So you can’t call me by my first name, but you can ask such personal questions? Jesus, you really are full of it, aren’t you?”

“Floch,” you nearly groan in frustration, “I thought I made it perfectly clear the last time I saw you that I’m not interested.”

“Why are you being so mean to me, hm?” Floch snakes a hand around your shoulders, jostling you until your face is mere inches from his. You’re more than aware of a pair of green eyes nearly boring a hole in your forehead, and you feel a pang of regret that you sent Sasha away so quickly, remembering far too late that Hitch’s table doesn’t offer a great view of where you’re seated at the bar.

“I’m not being mean,” you try to push at him, but he’s locked around you, “I’m just not interested.”

“Stop being such a bitch, Jesus Christ,” Floch finally lets you shove him away from you, but he’s far from done, “when did you get so stuck up, huh?”

“Floch. Keep your voice down, and walk away.” You try to warn him; Floch may be a pain in your ass, but you’d like to believe that he’s not a bad guy, deep down. You’re too late, however.

Eren’s materialized between you and Floch before you can blink, before you can even get another word out. His sudden presence forces you out of your barstool, stepping around him to get a better read on what the hell he thinks he’s doing. Eren seems not to notice you trying to insert yourself between him and Floch, and the look on his face makes you step back momentarily.

He looks terrifying. Eren’s nostrils are flaring, eyes blown wide and jaw clenched tight. He’s taking full advantage of his height, glaring down at Floch with such menace that if looks could kill, Floch would already be laid out on the floor.

“Get the fuck out of here, dude. She said no.”

“What are you, her little guard dog?” Floch, infamous for never knowing what’s best for him, scoffs at Eren’s incredibly intimidating posture.

“Maybe I am,” Eren sneers, “I’m damn sure not going to sit there and let you speak to her like that.”

“Who’s this loser?” Connie’s to your right now, gesturing to Floch. You don’t miss the telltale clenching of Eren’s hands by his side, and it hits your dizzied mind what’s going on. Eren’s going to end up swinging if you don’t interfere, and Connie’s there for backup.

“Floch, please.” You reach a feeble hand up to Floch’s chest, trying to gently push him in the other direction.

In the blink of an eye, Floch’s grabbing you by the wrist hard enough to solicit a yelp from your lips, throwing your arm away from him with a look of disgust.

“Oh, so now you want to touch me, bitch?”

No sooner has Floch’s hand released your arm than Connie’s got his arms wrapped around you, yanking you out of the crossfire. Amidst a series of gasps, Eren grabs Floch around the back of the neck, pins him face-first to the bar.

“Jaeger!” Levi barks sharply, darting over to the scene of the commotion.

“Is that what gets you off, huh?” Eren’s nearly nose-to-nose with Floch, whose busted lip is twisted in a grimace and dribbling little bits of blood onto the varnished bartop. “Calling women bitches when they don’t want your little dick?”

“Let him go, Eren,” Armin tries to intervene, having already dashed over from his barstool. You want to back him up, but you’re frozen where you’re pinned to Connie’s chest, trembling in his arms. You know Eren’s a little rough-and-tumble, but this, seeing it in real life, is much more terrifying than you could have imagined.

“What the hell? Are you okay?” You can hear Sasha’s voice from beside you, close enough to touch but distant in comparison to where your vision is zeroed in on Eren’s grip on the back of Floch’s neck.

“Answer me!” Eren rears Floch back a few inches and slams him against the bar again. Floch curses under his breath, wriggles fruitlessly under Eren’s weight.

“Get the fuck off me, Jaeger!”

“You fucking wish,” Eren hisses, tightening his grip further, “now apologize to my girl before you make me do something I’ll regret.”

“Eren,” you find your voice again, shaking out of Connie’s grip. You fist your hands into Eren’s hoodie sleeves, tugging hard enough to get his attention. “He’s not worth it. Let him go.”

“Listen to her, Jaeger,” Levi’s already-deep voice is stained with warning.

When you pull at his sleeve a little harder, Eren turns to you, eyes still blown wide and teeth bared. It startles you, but you hold firm, setting your own jaw and shaking your head.

“Let. Him. Go. Now, Eren.” You’re not sure how you’ve managed to muster up the conviction in your voice, but you’re grateful for it, as it seems to shake Eren back into himself. Eren slowly releases Floch and in the same easy motion, he guides you behind him with one long, strong arm.

“You,” Levi points accusingly at Floch, “out.”

Floch’s jaw drops. “I didn’t even–”

“Out.” Levi’s tone leaves no room for argument, and Floch seems to understand at least that. He turns his glare back to you and Eren, scowling deeply.

“The next time I see you, Jaeger, it’s fucking over.”

“Get lost before you make me fucking embarrass you,” Eren says, voice dripping with venom. Floch shakes his head, lets his gaze land on you. A chilling smile breaks over his features.

“Next time, sweetheart.”

“Get the fuck out of here already, bro,” Connie snaps, pointing towards the exit. Floch takes his leave, sauntering towards the door with all the confidence of someone who hadn’t just been pinned against the countertop. A heavy, staticky silence falls over the bar.

“If I see you fighting in here again, it’s over.” Levi’s cold eyes fall on Eren, who nods curtly in understanding. Eren brushes his hands through his hair, rests a hand on the bun at the back of his head. Something strange is coursing through your body; something that tastes like anger, burns like heartbreak, falls bitter on your tongue like envy.

“Are you okay?” Sasha appears at your side again, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Floch’s such a psycho, I’m not even surprised he picked a fight.”

You nod numbly, eyes never leaving Eren. He finally looks back down at you, none of the heat having left his eyes.

“What the fuck was that?” It takes you a moment to realize that it’s you speaking, you throwing those words up the inches from your mouth to Eren’s. Eren’s face contorts into a frown.

“What do you mean? He was bothering you, wasn’t he?”

“So you try to fight him?” You seethe. Maybe it is anger, this bizarre, foreign emotion tingling at the tips of your fingers. No, that’s not quite it, you’re not angry you’re just…confused. Hurt that Eren’s frolicking around with Breeze, doing whatever he pleases, and yet, he’s jumping into bar fights to save you from the tangible evidence of your past.

“What do you expect me to do when someone talks to you like that?” Eren hisses back, eyes narrowed.

Sasha’s backed away from the two of you now; you’re aware of your friends staring at you, noses scrunched as they try to figure out exactly what’s happening now. You wish you had an answer to give them, but all you can muster is this heartache shooting out of your mouth in the form of daggers.

“I don’t need you,” you spit, “I don’t need your protection.”

“It didn’t exactly look like you had that handled,” Eren scoffs, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, and what are you? My knight in shining fucking armor? Don’t you have other damsels in distress waiting for you?” It’s too far, you know that as soon as the words leave your mouth, but the liquid courage Sasha had insisted upon is making your tongue sharper than you’d anticipated.

Eren rears back from where he’s hunched to meet you on your level, nostrils flaring again. Before you can utter another word, he’s got an arm thrown around your shoulders none-too-gently, practically dragging your stumbling feet towards the exit.

“Outside.”

#hehehehehe enjoy #i love plug eren so much it hurts my head #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren jaeger series #eren jaeger fanfic #eren yeager series #attack on titan fic #aot fic #much ado about nothing #much ado uni #much ado universe

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dozing-marshmallow · 7 months

Note

Can you do more ChrisxNibbling stuff cause I saw you do it and I liked it,and can you do it with some campers? Ty!

Thank you! Hope you enjoy !! 💗

CHRIS MCLEAN’S NIBLING! READER AND CAMPERS (CONTINUED HEADCANONS)

This was removed from the final cut; after Egypt’s challenge came to an end, you had a lot of time to spend before you took flight and began the first elimination ceremony of the season.

To relieve frustration, Bridgette took the waves of the Mediterranean Sea, changing into her diving suit and putting her surfboard to good use.

She performed tricks you’ve never seen anyone do before- like one where she projected her board vertically at the wave’s lip and descended gracefully without losing her momentum.

“Cool...” you clapped your hands for the blonde surfer.

“Oh, (Y/N)!” she waved through her wet hair, gliding back to the shallow end,“You were watching?”

“Uh huh, uh huh! You’re so good!” you cheer, impressed at Bridgette’s ability to flow so powerfully on the walls of water,“Can you do that again?”

She happily grants your request,“Alright! Pay close attention!” there she went, this time, sliding frantically above the current, having buckets of spray flash after her, never catching her. She comes back to the shore again, in time for another show of your amazement.

“Woahhh...” a new aspiration was born,“I wanna do that!”

“Aw, really?” she smiled in flattery,“So happy I could inspire you! You’ll be great at it, it’s really fun! Want to see how it feels for yourself?” she offered welcomingly, nodding to her surfboard.

You pause,“I don’t know, Bridgette... I don’t have my swimwear on me and even though I’m boiling... Chris might not be happy if I end up getting wet in these clothes.”

Bridgette respects your duteous response, not minding the turn down,“Well, it’s really responsible of you to listen to your uncle since he’s the one that’s taking care of you. At least he cares about someone on this show!”

“He cares about you guys too!” you chirp otherwise,“Believe me, he just likes to play pretend!” Gosh, you could use some water, but not of the variety you were approaching, even the grains of soaked sand blazed the back of your shoes,“Can I hold onto your leg?”

“What?” Bridgette’s puzzlement very vivid in the watery heat,“But didn’t you say...”

Merrily, you delineated,“I know! But how can he know I went in if I don’t get wet? As long as I don’t get drenched, we’ll be off the hook! Besides, I’ve seen you do it without getting a single drop of water! You can do it again, right?”

You’re only young once. You had to go against the rules every now and then for a lifetime moment of fun. Bridgette grins at the opportunity she now had to introduce an interested kid to the world of surfing,“You can count on it. Just hold on, and try stay still.”

“Aye aye captain!” You carefully go sit at the rear end of the slippery surfboard. Bridgette walks next to it and slowly drags it back into the different medium of salty layers. Demands to maintain balance grew as you hovered above the upcoming waves, feeble hands clutching onto the sides of the surfboard, the whiteness of the sun livened the teal surrounding you.

On the right signal, Bridgette throws herself onto the surfboard and that’s where the fun really started.

Like going on a waterslide! An illegal waterslide. But a thrilling waterslide!

“Coooousin!” Sierra sang, rushing to sit next to you,“How are youu? Are you excited to spend this season together!?”

Why did she keep calling you that?,“Sure?” you look behind her, seeing Cody at the back, peering out from the first class doorway, clasping his hands together.

You sighed.

“Great! Because I have sooo many questions on my bucket list to ask you! It’s called primary data, research you collect yourself!” she bounces, her long magenta hair slapping your face,“That okay with you, cousin? I can give you a leg massage during the interview!”

That was a strange compromise,“No no... I’m good. Uh... What’s the questions?”

“Hehehe! Okay, okay! So you know back in kindergarten, did you actually like Mrs Pearlsey or were you pretending to so you wouldn’t be the last one to get snacks?”

...

I beg your pardon?

That wasn’t what you had in mind. Any tranquility you had evaporated into utter discomposure,“How’d you know that smelly witch’s name?”

"Eeeeee okay okay, so you did hate her!” she scrambled to write it down in her sudden appearing notebook.

“You still need to answer me!” you demand, looking around the empty economy class,“How did you know?”

Sierra had absolutely no idea how what she was doing was abnormal, still behaving like no more than a passionate fan,“Because cousin! We're a family! Family knows everything! Just like your pet fish that died. Riddles!” she tittered, poking your shoulder,“Hehehe, I knew his name too. I never knew why that was the case... Did your friendship with Sam Martins end because of Sheila Jens? Or did it end because he moved away?”

Hearing those names, you shifted drastically away in horror,“I don’t wanna talk to you anymore! Get away from me!” Those were private memories... Memories in which, you couldn’t tell if speared because it happened or because they were resurfacing from an oblivious blabber.

Like the intimate details of your life couldn’t just be kept to you?

“Cousin!” Sierra cools down, about time she got the message,“I didn’t mean to freak you out, I’m only saying these things because I care!” you push her away,“Like youuur safari birthday party! It was sooo cute! I have the exact decorations in a box at home! Your parents threw them away after party.”

“Thank you?” okay that, maybe from your mom’s Facebook. Still weird how she would’ve gone through the act of finding it and scrolling through it...

“Question, who is your favourite? Mom or dad?” her eyes minimised to make space for her hungry beam.

A non-specific reasonable question? A dove to your ears,“Uh...” still an uncomfortable one, but at least it wasn’t aimed from the threads of your life.

To answer it though, you’d never gave it much thought. You loved both of them-

“It’s your daddy, isn’t it? Admit it!” well, no point answering that if she had an answer already,“Aw! It’s so sweet that you still love him after he got in trouble for committing fraud.”

Fraud? Your dad?

No...

She’s lying.

You couldn’t believe it. You were outraged,“What are you talking about? My dad never did fraud! He’s an honest man! You’re a liar! Liar! Liar! Liar!” You yelled at her, as disgusted as your lungs could scratch. She could harass you all she wanted, but to involve your parents in such a lie? Killed any respect you had for her!

However...everything she’d been saying...

“Wait, you don’t know? Oooo, family learning time!” she gasps, as though it was fact, unknown to your spiking loathe for her- rather, it was all a moment for you to learn something harvested from the findings of a raving maniac,"Three years after you were born, your mommy and daddy wanted another baby. But after your daddy was fired for money deception, your mom was realllly mad, so they like decided they couldn't afford to take care of any more kids when they already had a strain on their marriage to mend. So yeah, that’s why it was just you! Auntie and uncle sure were busy, even now as we speak! It would totally be awesome if there was another member in the family though. Chris even said if it was a girl, he wanted it to be named Christy!” her smile as wide as ever, insensitive contrast to your frozen hanging face.

Your dad...fraud...fired...?

“Chris... My dad didn’t actually do fraud, did he?”

He was going to have to have a little talk with Sierra.

Your uncle in the matter was consumed by the abyssal realisation of the consequences he took lightly at the beginning when he accepted an archetype like Sierra on the show.

How could he have underestimated that badly?

Chris had that trait for as long as you knew him- play now, stress later.

Which is why, you didn’t want to go out of your way to bother him anymore for the rest of the night. Even if it meant losing your bedtime story streak.

It was a bummer, but Chris’ well-being mattered more to you than your needs that could be met at any leeway, and you’d hate to coerce him into doing something when he wasn’t in the mood for it.

Not to mention, you yourself wasn’t in a good mood after hearing something that wasn’t in either Sierra’s nor your business to know.

Sierra... It was gonna be difficult enduring her.

It didn’t change how you were sitting in a more shrouded area of first class, a red curtain, leaning on a wall.

“Fine evening, is it not?”

You glance to the source of question.

Look who it is. Charmer boy.

“Yeah...” you didn’t have enough energy to interrogate his convenient timing after wasting most of the day reflecting on the backstory you never knew you had.

He clearly saw that too,“Why so down, little one?”

Ah,“I... Chris is meant to read me a bedtime story... But...”

“But?” Alejandro repeated, very patiently.

“...” you shouldn’t be sharing anything remotely personal with him,“Never mind. It’s nothing.”

“No no, please. Is he...not available for you?”

Your mind rolled back to where Chris was, destress-ing away in the steam of his hot tub,“You can say that...”

Alejandro places his attention on your storybook “Scaredy Squirrel”, the front cover featuring a cartoon squirrel with a Cheshire Cat smile and takes the situation to offer,“Would you prefer if I were to read it to you? Just for tonight?”

Although you had grown used to Alejandro’s dark brown hair and red button up, it seemed you had forgotten through your thorough look up at him.

You didn’t know how Alejandro read story books, but better than nobody,“Okay!” perhaps it’ll help clear your head. Besides, his team did win the very section you were in so you were bound for comfort regardless.

You both are able to fit in one of the golden chairs, thanks to your smaller physique. Holding Mrs Maple, Alejandro takes the book into his hands, turning it around, feeling for the first time and reads the title aloud,“Scaredy Squirrel” he opens it to the first page,“Scaredy Squirrel never leaves his nut tree. He’d rather stay in his safe and familiar tree than risk venturing out into the unknown.”

Woah... You had grown used to Alejandro’s smooth voice, but to hear it in this setting felt like warm milk becoming sound,“The unknown can be a scary place for a squirrel. A few things Scaredy Squirrel is afraid of: green Martians, killer bees, tarantulas, poison ivy, germs, sharks.” His voice was so soft. No crack, no rasp, it was scripted for storytelling. It was scripted for anything.

“Are you scared of any of those things, Alejandro?” you asked him, positioning Mrs Maple in an angle where she could also see the pictures.

“Why should I be? All these things are a mere life form, they exist peacefully. It would be wrong to hold hate against Mother Nature’s creations when they haven’t done anything threatening to us.” There he goes, scarring ambiguity onto his pretty words.

“Even the killer bees?” you giggle. It was right in the name and he called that peaceful?

A smile does grow on his face, catching what you’re indicating,“That’s a different case. They tend to be a lot more territorial than the average bee, but at the end of the day, they help pollinate our plants and help make our food yummy.”

His terminology demoted for you, making his tone elixir sleepy eyelids quicker. You were worried you wouldn’t reach the end of the book.

“But let’s say, just for example, that something unexpected did happen... You can rest assured that this squirrel is prepared.”

You got up to Scaredy Squirrel’s improved schedule, before you nodded off to sleep. Alejandro noticed your first few seconds of slower breathing and verbal absence, and despite that, he kept reading on until he finished.

He removed one of the clean first class blankets out of the plastic packaging and placed it on himself and you, moving as delicately as he could so you could keep using his side as a pillow.

He really would have loved to be the eldest child,“Dormir bien, little one.”

What happened in the past is in the past, and your dad was a changed man- he had to be, or else your mother would’ve left him time ago. See! There was no need for you to worry your little mind to death- Alejandro helped repair your perception without even needing to know what had stained it.

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l0vegl0wsinthedark · 1 year

Text

Head auror Harry directing missions from the offices at the MoM strolling around the room, sipping tea, clipping his toe nails or some shit, listening to his charmed ear piece, and making shitty fucking jokes and he's unflappable, like he's faced so many dangerous situations where he had to be quick and think on his feet and had his heart racing and adrenaline pumping throughout his life that at around age 40 he ran out of fucks to give and just literally cannot react anymore to a single piece of information about a national or international level emergency like

Auror: Sir we just stormed the abandoned house and set off billions of dark curses with a radius of a million miles

Harry: ah too bad

Auror: what do we do?!!

Harry: fucking disapparate, you twats, God I can't believe I gave y'all badges

Auror: Sir the dark wizards want to blow up the muggle parliament

Harry: ugh those Guys are Fawke-ing with my dinner plans haha geddit?

Auror: Sir they are about to close a deal with corrupt muggle government officials, what do we do

Harry: oh shit is it gonna be on the 5th of November??? Can you fucking imagine

Auror: Sir

Harry: Floopowder, flu season and snot amirite?? hehehe

Auror: Sir please whom do we arrest they are about to make an Unbreakable Vow

Harry, stubbornly: didn't you understand my joke?!

Auror, crying: I'm gonna lose my job, sir

Harry: are you crying right now like do you think I cried when I pretended to die at 17

Auror: I just want to go home

Harry: fucking fine, stun the lot of them and call for backup. My god

And then one day there's a gigantic mission underway and Harry's preparing to go into the field after sitting on his arse for like 7 years but this time it's just that serious and then there's a voice on the magical earpiece (that everybody on the case is connected to)

Secretary: head auror sir I have an important message for you from home

Harry, strapping on gear: tell him to shut up, I remember I need to pick up apples

Secretary: ...no that's not it

Harry: what does the git want

Secretary: he...said he went home to find the fridge left open again and the dog got in. And the cat. And your daughter's bunny. And your snake almost ate the bunny but the dog kept him off

Harry:

Secretary: and the milk went bad

Harry, paralysed with fear: listen, Ann, they need me I need to go now

Secretary: he's screaming in my floo, sir

Harry: could you order a dozen apples to be delivered home

Secretary: he says he's coming here

Harry: gotta go

And he's gone for like three days until draco has calmed down. The mission is taken care of in like 15 minutes tho.

#he's not scared of draco but he knows when he done fucked up #drarry

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itwoodbeprefect · 21 days

Text

catching up!! watching 911 season 7 episode 1!! let's goooo

the first three minutes of this episode are like "athena watched a cruise ship disaster on tv and it affected her for life. here's a cruise ship disaster we're putting on your tv (hehehe)."

i briefly stop watching mayday/air crash investigation episodes, only to STILL see a plane crash into a house. let's get greg feith and his excellent colorful ties in here asap

okay not actually technically relevant but. i googled "greg feith ties" and found this:

and the answer is no!! shut up!!

anyway. bi buck and his bi saw! (i may be too early.)

ahhh, the face i've already seen a dozen times:

buck was missed. <3

god, i love chimney. presumably this honeymoon life plan of his isn't going to work out perfectly smoothly, but it's adorable.

athena's dress is great, but this is a prime Just Talk To Bobby Please sort of worry she's having. i mean, literally, talk to him, and she'll probably find they do have things to talk about.

THREE DATES A WEEK. yeah, there we go (affectionate), that's gonna be a mess. very sweet, very stupid!

a spreadshEET. i love themmm. still very stupid though!!

"except only in one case is there underlying sexual tension [sprays using phallic looking object at hip height]" is definitely a little insane, you were all correct. also EXTREMELY a conversation that feels like they knew what they were doing, considering i now know where this is going

eddie is a nester! he nests!

christopher doesn't get this from eddie, implying he gets it from buck somehow. feelingssss.

god. buck taking save the trees a bit too figuratively:

throwing the champagne glasses to the side while you're in the pool is i guess a cool carefree no fucks given thing to do in theory, but it's going to be so much less cool and carefree when you step in the glass while walking around barefoot later. i mean, on top of the waste of a perfectly good glass

i HAD seen the angsty mom-left-us (and eddie is listening in) part of the buck&chris conversation, but not the entire part before it with buck very earnestly trying to find his way through this parenting talk eddie enlisted him for, and it's great, i love it.

"i feel like you're trying to avoid me." < thank you for Saying The Thing, bobby.

lola is resting..... this man has blood behind his ear...... this is 911...... he killed lola?

"i don't think we're gonna see much of lola any time soon." oh, she's VERY dead. and/or locked in their cabin, which would potentially be good and dramatic when the ship starts sinking

he made a list!! love you, bobby

athena going full "norman peterson murdered his wife!!!" and bobby being very convinced that he didn't and athena is making things up to avoid him is a) finally a funny turn for this subplot and b) even funnier in light of bobby's behavior in the rear window episode.

"... o-or he murdered his wife." i love when this show does comedy and the timing is just right. thank you, peter krause

one of the things about this show that i still think was a terrible writing choice is the way they killed shannon, so i'm glad they're at least dealing with the impact all of the parental shuffling and absence had on christopher. it's great that they brought the actress back for that one moment.

"did i read the spreadsheet wrong?", reminding me of the spreadsheet, and "did something else happen on a call?", meaning maddie immediately knows what would have changed chimney's mind again - maddie and chimney are flawless, no notes.

THEY took lola!! so that's how the ship activity manager or whatever that guy with the weird vibe's job is will turn out to be evil and/or in evil cahoots with lola

dongle. i haven't heard that word in forever. didn't know they were being used for bitcoin

oh, 911. just a ship in a weather-related emergency isn't enough, we also need terrorists holding everyone hostage. at times i could almost start to think i was watching h50

#911 #*#if i do it this way watching four episodes will take me about three times as long but that's okay. i'm extending my stay in 911 world

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stayarmytinyzenmoa-l · 8 months

Note

just marathoned the infatuation sungchan story <//3 i love sungchan too much sorry renjun if i see him in the pet store i would have fallen head over heels

i kinda wanna see the infatuation series to be like flipped (??) idk how to explain but yn is basically the yandere one or theyre also a yandere w him obsessing w eo

like yn and somi going to the pet store and he gets infatuated by sungchan with how cute he is and completely forgotten theyre getting stalked and becomes obsessed w sungchan

but also a part 2 of the recent sungchan drabble sounds good it may be angst but also comfort fluff w yn becoming guilty over leaving sungchan and even though somi and renjun is near they ran cause what is happening w sungchan? they see him crying and they comfort him (u could make it seem like somi and renjun followed yn idk)

INFATUATION thats a name i haven't seen in my inbox in a hot sec (aside from that one req) but also ugsdfhgfdjhg no me too Sungchan u caught my heart boyo!!!!

But also you know what I actually toyed with an idea similar before but with a different idol group, ATEEZ. It's in the drafts rn, but the whole thing is Seonghwa is the first Yan while YN goes through some descent into madness but yeah fun stuff! Maybe that will be a spooky season thing hehe

But no yeah that's a solid idea! There was a time that I planned to do a silly after-end thing once I finally sat down and finished Johnny's ending buuuuut we'll see hehehe anyway a part 2 👀 sure why not?

Infatuation AU Pairing: Yandere!Sungchan x Reader TW: Unsettling themes, Blood, Implied Self Harm Notes: I can see the need for a good ending but these infatuated boys will never know joy >:) [Part 1]

"Oh my god, (Y/N)!" Somi's arms wrapped around you tight, not letting you go for a minute, even when you eventually separated her hand still held yours. "Where have you been? We've been so worried!" She clasps her hands over yours now across the booth. You'd both decided to meet up at the Starbucks by campus, it was just the easiest place to pinpoint, you'd spent almost all of your undergrad there together and, for some reason, it seemed to be the safest place right now.

"I... I don't even know where to start, Soms..." you shook your head slowly. "I missed you guys so much..."

"Where were you?" Her eyes were desperate.

"Do you..." You looked around. "Do you remember Sungchan?"

"That kid from the pet store? What about him?" You were silent, and Somi pieced the story together herself. But, before she could say anymore, the door to the cafe opened and someone rushed in.

"Somi! I came as soon as you called!" Renjun was frantic, but he seemed to calm down as soon as he saw you. And you felt your heart melt at him. "(Y/N)..." your name was fragile on his lips. "Oh my god, (Y/N)," he reached for you and, for some reason, you flinched back, and Renjun's heart broke.

"Sorry," you muttered, rubbing your wrists habitually. Renjun fell into the seat next to Somi.

"What happened?" If Somi was desperate, Renjun was crazed. "Months, no contact, no sign, we've been looking for you nonstop and here you are... okay," he says. You didn't blame him for looking this way, hell, he's never looked worse.

"It's such a long story," you said. Then, your phone rang. And you answered it before Somi and Renjun could even think of looking at it.

"Hello?" You said quietly. The other two listened with baited breath.

"... Where are you?" Sungchan's voice was quiet too. You hesitated.

"At a Starbucks," you didn't exactly lie.

"... where?" He asked again. You swallowed harshly. "Please come home, I'm sorry, I know I said you could go, but... I didn't think you'd be gone this long. Please come home. I don't know what I'm going to do without you here. Come home, (Y/N)."

"I," you looked at your friends and you couldn't read their expressions. "I'll be right there." You rushed out. You remembered the last time this happened, the last time you were gone for just a bit too long and at that time you were just in the pet shop with the bunnies, imagine now, you're in a whole other town, and you had to take the taxi just to get home.

You were fumbling with the keys to the apartment when you realized the sheer ridiculousness of your statement. Home? When did you consider this hellhole your home? You didn't know. You didn't even have time to close the door when you ran in.

"Sungchan?" You looked around the apartment. It was quiet, too quiet. You started opening doors and cabinets, anything you'd think to check regardless of whether it was plausible or not, until, finally, you looked in the bathroom. You threw open the shower curtain, and Sungchan sat in the bathtub, legs pulled up to his chest and shirt twisted in such a strange way that you couldn't even fathom how it got like that in the first place. Sungchan looked up at you, phone still in his hand as if you were still on it, and he relaxed. "Oh..." you pitied him. And he reached for you, wrapping his arms around your legs and pressing his head against your thighs. You bent down slowly, adjusting so he was holding your shoulders instead. "It's okay, I'm here," you reassured him.

"I'm sorry," he says.

"It's fine, it's fine," you comforted him.

"I thought I was ready."

"It's fine," you ran your hands through his hair now.

"I..." Sungchan is cut off by a gasp. You look to the door and Somi has her hands over her mouth and Renjun... he was just quiet.

"Blood... blood," Somi's voice was muffled. You pulled Sungchan away from you for just a moment and near gagged. How did you not see that before.

"What the fuck..." Renjun mutters. "This? This is what you've had to do for months? Oh fuck..." he mumbles. His hand clutched his phone. "I'm calling the cops."

"Call an ambulance first! Oh god!" Somi panics.

"Sung? Sungchan?" You held his face in your hands and you look down at his arms again. "Why?!"

"You took too long."

General Tag List: @stopeatread @bat-shark-repellant @raeincitizen @umbralhelwolf @yangsrose @kazooms @sadcoffeecritic

NCT Tag List: @cherrylovr @minjiville

Infatuation: @lune1897 @beefchippp @nawkamoto @shiningstar-byulxx @treasuretaeil @jaesspresso @huangberryyy @yutafrita

If you want to be added to either tag list or removed just send me a reply to this post, and ask, or a DM and I’ll add you as soon as possible!

#yandere #yandere nct #nct #nct x reader #nct x you #nct x yn #nct u #nct u x reader #nct u x you #nct u x yn #sungchan x reader #sungchan x you #sungchan x yn #riize x reader #yandere riize #riize x you #riize x yn #my writings #infatuation

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keikakudom · 6 days

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Agsudisg I'm so glad you liked it, Kazi, I literally sat down the moment I finished reading and started drawing cuz you freaking killed me, I MEAN, vox being stubborn and denying help, and Alastor stubbornly giving him the aid he needs, but crouched in their respective toxic egos and self-image? So delicious. Alastor, who needs to know why he was left behind, and vox who's desperately pouring himself into the new thing... Ahhhh...

The part where he implies he really was running off to die...and Alastor goes all soft...the shared frequency, the antenna petting... I reread that multiple times bc it's so good...and the claws, the claws, vox denies wanting help from alastor to the last, but the claws!

(also we tots need full seasons and reruns of 'Let's Shit on Vox', I bet Alastor even encourages to call in with more info, not that anyone would bc they're too scared. Hey, does carmilla have to listen his obsession LOL)

Btw for the artist questions, if you want, 9, 14, 30?

YOU NEVER FAIL TO MAKE ME GUSH, ES AAAA...oh lemme tell you when I lock-in, i do NOT fuck around with toxic old men yaoi. When I get better at writing, I hope to capture all their glory✨

I have never really written in this particular weird genre, I don't even know what to call it? Disgustingly intimate love/hate? At least, that's what I aspire for it to be XD

Heheh the part where "Alastor goes all soft" is also a little on the part of RR!AU characterization, so it's a bit exaggerated. He's trying to ween his way in appealing to Vox again, but RR!AU Vox is just so tired. Alastor keeps bringing up the past....This was kind of a wacky scenario to write because it does skip/make you infer a lot of stages of development, but the AU is close enough to canon that I think it's not far to imagine filling in the gaps hhh....

LMFAO yes, Alastor def encourages call-ins, "The 'Let's Shit on Vox' show, your one-stop opportunity to diss Hell's most saturated overlord!" -- on the rare occasion someone actually called in, Alastor killed whoever said something off about Vox that wasn't to his "flavor" of hate.

Carmilla has already read through these two idiots and just rolls her eyes at their immaturity. If she's there for Alastor's radio show, she's just in the background, utterly done and convinced they're playing everything up for entertainment at this point. Now that has me thinking, if Alastor ever started feeling something unfamiliar and god-forbid genuinely *good*(????), he would probably consult Rosie or Carmilla for it first........and Vox would ask Charlie.....oh..........

Aaaand Artist Questions under the cut, TYSM for the ask <33

9. What are your file name conventions?

I have terrible file organization. Many of them are named "a", "aa3", "asgv", "fhgh", or other random keyboard smashes. Recently, I have a bad habit of naming files "sketch1", "sk1", "skht1", or some misspelled way-- it's gotten so bad I'm up to "sketch22".... I find things by icon only.

14. Any favorite motifs?

Straight edges and shapes, maybe? I started drawing with an anime style though I'm mostly into western media-- I think it's very satisfying to have nice shape design/silhouettes though, but I don't draw in a super cartoony or exaggerated style so it's kind of hard to tell that I like and have fun doing it. I'm kind of scattered and like to dip my foot into everything unfortunately.

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated?

None really, but if I had to pick one for HH, maybe this one.

For my older art, definitely this one. I mean, I don't love it anymore, but I really thought I ATE with the concept at the time.

#ask #flonautilus #you are giving me so much nice words of confidence sobs

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panelshowsource · 9 months

Text

hahahaha that is so funny i have no idea! interestingly i've found a few things on taskmaster to be taken from japanese and korean game shows, so i guess we're all just sharing the fun :')

martin freeman. obviously. no debate. bosch. next question

anon this is so exciting for you!!! we all wish we could watch tm for the first time again!!! hehehe

you may be pleased to know s04 is a great fan favourite, as is...most of the first five series 🥹 i have a ridiculous soft spot for s02, which is pretty tragic since it was so short. in the beginning, in general, the contestants didn't quite understand the full potential of the format, didn't realise all of the lateral thinking they could do, didn't try or want to push the rules — so there's something just so stupid about it, like they really just let alex push them around and laugh at them, and that was so funny. now, there are a lot more rules, certain elements can be tired, the writing team has to work hard so it's not formulaic, etc. still an amazing programme, in HUGE parts thanks to 1) alex and 2) their editor rachel (we stan!!!), but the wide-eyedness of the earliest series are unbeatable in some regards imo. that said, we've had some great recent series, 14 being the the most recent fan fave imo!

btw don't forget to watch the nye and champion of champions specials if you're not already!! they're so silly heh junior taskmaster is also coming up!!

i watched the first series of the nz version recently and i just...idk i may be a purist, but it's been hard for me to get into it. the contestants are really great

— except for, you know...you know what. now i can say it. this is my time to say it. i am so angry about a grown white man in all red and these disgusting THIN little 🤢flip flops🤢

like how dare you wear those abominations on your feet. how dare you make me look at this. anon you're a kiwi so maybe you know this man and maybe next time you see him at the supermarket let him know panelshowsource from tumblr is so mad at him istg. i am genuinely fuming sfhdfkgrd —

but it was a bit predictable, especially with paul not finding his own character right off the bat. that said, i hear it gets even better with series 2 so i need to try it! otherwise, people seem to like the denmark version as well! i want to try that one out :)

i think ed has proven in over ten episodes of the podcast that he makes the utmost effort to use mae's pronouns; i can only recall noticing a slip-up once so imo it's exceptionally rare. mae has also commented on this directly and is very understanding to people who are still adjusting to the language. that said, i am sorry if ed's mistakes made you uncomfortable and if you want to shoot them an email with a suggestion then i don't why you couldn't/shouldn't. that said, i don't think you need to be concerned there's any maliciousness or laziness on the podcast's part because it really does seem they care x

ugh i can only HOPE and PRAY and DREAM and FANTASTISE we get miles on tm actually let's all do a collective sigh of disappointment that we couldn't get miles/frankie on the same season...

i'm usually not one for making predictions because i'm just so remarkably wrong so much of the time, but in my mind there are only two routes for miles: he'll either speedrun the entire thing dara ó briain style

— hold that thought did you guys know one of alex's sons is called dara? i just learned that the other day and i was like wow. okay back to the sentence i was writing —

or he'll flop in the most paddington bear way à la john kearns. i don't see a middle of the road for our guy. interestingly, i just listened to the tm podcast episode with the show director andy devonshire, and he and ed were saying that taskmaster isn't a place for characters: that you come into the show and end up having to be yourself (hence why ed was a competitive maniac muahaha). we've seen miles in really intelligent dynamics, and he can be both witty and unseriously goofy in them, but i'm not sure i've seen enough of him trapped with his own thoughts to know just how he'd perform heh

another thing ed mentioned on the podcast with andy d was his belief that greg is biased towards the older contestants (something like "they talk about being tired and greg simply relates to that — even though greg is not a tired old man and actually has a very youthful energy"; which i love, because it's so fascinating to me how often we forget / people don't realise greg's age because he just fits into any age group so seamlessly), so it makes me wonder if greg wouldn't lovingly bully miles and would actually find him charming/cute

sigh [picks up phone to call alex] let me see i can make this happen

LMAOOO like 5 minutes after the movie released one of my besties called me and was like "sarah. listen to me. rob brydon is sugar daddy ken. this is not a joke. this is code red. this is code. red."

rob is living his dream!!!

cutest anon of the year

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giggly-squiggily · 10 months

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Hi, Squiggly! How are you? For the Hc to drabble event, I'mma go with my baby in BSD! I personally HC that because Fyodor has never been touched (cuz his ability), he is stupidly ticklish to light tickles (not hard tickles because he's used to blocking out harder sensations. How? Dazai prolly punched him or something). Who takes advantage of this? DAZAI OFC😂. Also, because this is literally the only thing that poses a threat to him, he gets extremely nervous by the mere threat of tickles. Like he goes from mega-4D-mind-chess-player-genius to a giggly mess of a rat who can't even string together a sentence without begging😂.

Feel free to decline this. I wrote this assuming Fyodor is your one exception to your 'BSD only until season 2 rule'. Stay safe, buddy!

KJErkjajkeraejkrjkejkrje YESH! I've gotcha covered, anon; this is freaking hilarious! Once again- Fyodor and I have this weird "I know OF you but might not know you well" relationship so if this is OOC I apologize! I hope you like it! :D

It was a secret no one knew about until now. With Crime and Punishment, only a fool would be bold enough to touch Fyodor Dostoevsky in such a way.

And wouldn’t you know it, the fool actually lived.

“My, what do we have here?” Dazai was in absolute bliss as he dragged his nails along Fyodor’s belly, grinning from ear to ear as the smaller man thrashed and squeaked below. “The great Fyodor is sensitive to a few quick flicks of a finger? What about two? Or three?” With his own ability in full use, Dazai was a man of little worries. “How come I never knew of this before?”

“Ahehahahahahaha! Dahahha-ahhahahahzai, yohoohohoohu fiehehehehehehehehnd!” Fyodor arched when those dastardly fingers wandered closer to his ribs, nails gently scratching. “Gehehheheheht ohohohohohohohff meheheheheheheh!”

“Hmm…no.” Fingers wandered higher, slowly making their ascent towards his armpits. “I think I’m gonna keep tickling you! You’re so cute when you laugh, I could listen to you all day- was that a snort?” He lightly scratched along his upper ribs once more, earning the same reaction. “Did I just find your piggy spot?”

“WHAHAHAHT THE HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHELL!” Fyodor cried, cheeks flushed bright red as Dazai carried on tracing that spot, occasionally slipping upward into his pits. His squirming increased to the point he was practically levitating. “WHOHOOHOHO ARE YOHOHOOHU CAHAHAHAHLLING A- SQUEEEEEEHHH!!”

“Oo, a squeal! This really is a bad spot, huh?”

Damn him!

“DAHAHHAHAHAZAI YOOHOHOHOU SON OF A- AHEHAHAHHAH STHAHAHHAP STHAHAHAHAHP PLEAHHAHASE!” At his limit with his pride wounded, he had no choice but to give in. “I GIHIHIHIHIVE!”

“Hehehe, that didn’t take long at all, huh?” Dazai cooed sweetly as the tickles came to an end, leaning into his hands as Fyodor gasped helplessly. “All it took was a few pokes to break you down. I’m gonna have to remember this.”

“Dohoohn’t sound so smuhuhuhug! Come here!” Fyodor shot up, shoving Dazai onto his back and quickly returning the favor. Giggles and squeals resumed, filling the barely silenced space.

Send me a headcanon and I'll write a dabble for it!

#headcanons to dabbles #tickle #tickle dabble #bsd #fyodor dostoevsky #dazai osamu #fyozai #dorks #I'm officially calling it a piggy spot thank you :D

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two-hands-toward-the-sun · 4 months

Note

fic writer asks 7, 17, and 22 👀👀👀👀 i love ur writing and I'd love to listen to you talk about it!!!

AWWW that is TOO KIND 🥺🥺 it makes me so so happy to hear that!! Fuck!!

ANYWAY *unmelts myself so I can answer your questions*

From this ask game; anyone is welcome to send them in!

7. A fic of yours you think is underrated?

OUGH. I’m gonna go with my Mazikeen/Lucifer ficlet “i am singing now while rome burns.” Getting into Mazikeen’s head was a super fun challenge, and I like how all the prose fell into place. I worked hard on getting the characterisation as correct as I could get it, considering it’s just a 400 word story xD. And I’m just??? So into that panel in Season of Mists where Mazikeen and Lucifer tongue-fuck right in front of Dream??? It’s everything to me. That moment, combined with the Everything of Cassie Clare as Mazikeen and Gwendoline Christie as Lucifer, should have birthed at least a hundred fics in my HUMBLE OPINION. (Shout-out to @zorawitch who has done so much for the Mazifer nation!!)

17. Have you ever or would you ever write a fic in first person POV?

I certainly have! For about a year I was writing fics for a certain book series (I still have a fondness for it, but there are aspects of it that I’m now uncomfortable with so it shall go unnamed in this post), and they’re written in first person. The POV character has an incredibly distinctive voice and it was SO fun to try to capture it, and I think I did a pretty good job of it generally. Most of those fics were posted to a private series-specific fanfiction site, but now I’m thinking I should cross-post them to AO3 anonymously…

I’d certainly write first person fics again if the opportunity presented itself! Probably only for book series that are written in first person, though.

22. Pick out a random line from a fic you're really proud of

Oh I LOVE this question!!! Thanks so much for asking it!

Let’s see—after some deliberation, I decided to go with: Laughter bubbled out of Lucienne’s throat, and she felt so light; no, she amended to herself, she felt heavy with the weight of the woman she loved and who loved her, and it was glorious.

It’s from my very first Sandman fic, “our place in the sun.” (It’s also the first Lucienne/Calliope fic on the archive hehehe. I love creating ship tags! I’ve done it…three or four times now?) I think this sentence flows very well. Heaviness is often associated with negative emotions and lightness with positive, and I enjoyed flipping that around! Also they’re just ridiculously cute in that fic, my GOD.

Thanks for sending me such a great set of collections and for being generally so lovely about my work 💕💕 it is so, so deeply appreciated. Have a good night or day!

#asks #fic writer asks

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thefandom-casserole · 3 months

Text

Episode 49 Notes-

Heheheh I had a snow day so I got to listen early!!!!!!!!!!!

THE INTRO SONG OMG

We are winning with the dndads music lately hehehe

“Like there’s a Druid in my mind saying it’s gonna be oak” SOBBING

Oak this is a bop actually

Holy shit there were so many things bad that happened to normal lately 😭

They’re in the past!!!!!! Oh my goddddddd

Taylor’s Teen Fact: Taylor was the runner up of the Teen High Teen of the Year award (which Margarita Pizza won). Taylor is a very good cup stacker (third place in a competition)

We forget that Taylor is canonically the most popular kid

Freddie’s facts are always the craziest of all time. I love it

Linc’s Teen Fact: Linc had to do things other than soccer playing so Marco and Grant got him into artsy stuff. Of course he only would pain/sculpt soccer type things. So he decided to start selling them on Next Door (with an account called Foot King). Marco and Grant took him off of the app. He’s a good painter basically

Normal’s Teen Fact: Normal always keeps his hot glue gun on him

Scary’s Teen Fact: Scary doesn’t have a New Years Resolution because she decided it was too resolute (too firm, too definite). She wants to be able to choose whether or not to do something

Daddy Fact: Anthony’s goal is to write a porn thing and he was reached out to by a porn website to write for them. He was gifted a care package (picture as you will)

He’s already written the script 😭

OH SHIT TAYLOR AND SCARY AREN’T WITH THEM

Ooohh AU where they ARE the four horseman of the apocalypse

THE DOLPHIN CULT YAYYYYYYYYYYAGAJAHHSJDND

Sitcom staring the Porpy and Flippy: Cop sidekicks

NO DOOD HAS DOODLERIZED EVERYONEEEEEE

Well Willy did but whatever

Screw Willy

Grill Master the Dolphin!!!!!!! Ayyyyyy

Dang Willy is God

They’re in a five person (well four person now) marriage don’t judge the dolphins!!!!

Awww they’re only like. Fifteen.

Heh Glenn Close/Jodie Foster (a good guy) in charge of Hell, Willy Stampler (a bad guy) in charge of Heaven

Yoooo wait the FBI is apart of the Hell now

Lark still hates Henry omg

Sparrow!!! Omg

Normal and Scary are so similar omg omg omg

Damn Good Omens much

What is it with Willy getting at the Oaks?

OH IS IT BECAUSE THEY HAVE PART OF DOOD IN THEM!?!?!?

“Brother” AYYY THEYRE BACK

The codependents of all time

HENRY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

This dumb spell my goodness I love their debate

Why are they so set on killing Henry 😭

Oh only 49 damage that’s not that bad

TAYLOR BREAKS LARKS ANCLE OMG

Scary noooooooo

SPIDER BOIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Scary’s gonna die 😭 😭 😭 😭

Taylors such an ass omg

Scary got 44 damage

“I say no once in six years of podcasting”

TEHYRE ON FUREEEEEBSJAJAHIWIW

SCARY AND HENRY A DUO I DIDNT KNOW I NEEDED

Lark and Sparrow make me so unwell omg

NO LARK LETS GO OF SPARROW NOOOO

Begging for Lark to have a whole thing about Sparrow with Normal

No one catches Lark 😭

Taylor is so funny omg

TAYLOR WITH SPARROW OMG

They seriously are having season one vibes I missed this so much omg

Nooo that was such a good transition

Taylor having his own mini adventure is because they played a Taylor Swift song for their intro

CASSANDRA OH NO

TAYLOR JS GOING TO KILL WILLY IF HE DOES ANYTHING ELSE TO HIS MOM

This whole Taylor thing is giving off BIG Leviathan Fabian vibes with Chungle Down Bim

YOOO THE MARRIAGE THING OMG STRIKES AGAIN

Please say this works

Roll high

Ohh a 12

LINC JUST PRAYED TO WILLY

Voicemail box 😭

Of course Taylor is going to find his name

OMG WAIT FREDDIE’S PLAN WAS LITERALLY OREDICTED BY SOMEONE ON TUMBLR I SWEAR

I DUNNO WHO

BUT MAY APPOLO’S VISION BE UPON YOU OR WHATEVER

Nooooo and it’d be easier for Taylor too because HIS MOM MARRIED WILLY OMG OMG

HIS LAST NAME TECHNICALLY COULD BE STAMPLER MUCH EASIER NOW BECAUSE OF THAT

SCARYA ND HENRY YAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYSGHAHWHSHSHSHSVSAHWJHAHSB

Henry stopppppppp you’re messing with Scary :cccccccc

Nooo scary still has the hat omg oh dear

Oh dear Willy’s God now he could probably control someone’s mind through their sleepppp

Oh god I hate Barry so much. He sucked so much I hate him

AHHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHSHHAHSHHSHSH SCARY BEING A SOCCER OEROSN OMG OSBAKAJSH

Taylor squints so hard that someone dies 😭

AYYY THATS CANON

I wonder if he’s gonna get the original daddies as well as the Kiddads

Scary’s pulling what Riz did with Biz ayyyy

Aww that would’ve been sick if he believed her

NO NO DONT TELL HER SHE WAS LIKE YOU FUCK YOU WILLY

FUCKING GET HIM SCARY GET HIS ASS GET EM

Scary just wants attention :ccccc

“Good luck” ANTHONY THAT HAD NO BUSINESS BEING SO OMINOUS OMG

Noooo remembering the thing with the cheese :ccc

I miss early season two

NO THATS WHERE EVERYRHING WITH HERMIE HAPPENED AYLGHHHHHHSVSHHSHS

“YOU BITCH” omg normal 😭

“Give me an L” “You’ve had enough Ls” “I’ll give you one of mine”

No the way it fits the intro

AHHH NORMAL USING HIS CHEER TO CHEER UP LINC

This episode is making me giddy omg /pos

Linc is getting so sad this is worryinggggg. He’s acting like Grantttttt

This whole eye thing is seriously the math questions on my tests

A happy normal is something I’ve missed so so much

I think literally all of these kids (except maybe Taylor) have a guilt complex (Scary/Willy, Normal/Code Purple, Linc/im not quite sure)

DARRYL AUYYYYYAYAYAYYAYAHAHABBSHSJSJS

JODIE AND GLENN YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYABSJAHWH

Omg Jodie and Glenn together 😭

WIAT WAIT OKG WAIT

THE THING THAT MAKES THEM BELIEVE JN SHIT

THE WHOLE THING WITH THE CLOSE FAMILY DID THAT FOR TAYLOR

AND HE GOT THE PERSUASION THING

DOES THAT MEAN THATLL HAPPEN FOR THE OTHER TEENS WHEN THEYRE THING IS COMPLETED

ITS LIKE WHEN IN FH THEY GIT TO REROLL A STAT AFTER SOOHMORE YEAR

Scary looks like Larry!!

Omg Freddie is genuinely so smart omg

HAMILTON AYYYYYYYY

Yam ya

I’m gonna use that

He had a flying spell wowwww

REVERSE GRAVITY AUAGAHHAJAHAHHAHAHJW

OhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHH

Will and me both man

Larry is so cool omg

Dood nooooooo

RONNNNAHGAHAHAHAHHSHS

FUCK YOU WILLY

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOUHAGSJSHHAHAAHAHS

Mfer admits that Ron posed a threatttttt

Honey badger waits for no one

I’m gonna start using that too

GO BETH OMG

Willy likes the science kid oh my god I’m gonna sob

Larry gives off church camp vibes

Willy’s doing the spaghetti thing 😭

OMG OMG

WILLY TAYLOR IS GOING TO KILL YOU IF YOI HURY CASSANDRA PIOE THAT HOLY SHIT

“You’d be a lot prettier if you smiled Cassandra” GET HIS ASS TAYLOR GET. HIS. ASS.

You know I hated Willy before

But this is a whole new fucking level

Awww that’s so sweet at the end <33

AHHAHAHAHHAHA THIS EPISODE MAN

I don’t know how I’m gonna be able to wait for the next episode ahhh

IVE LISTENED TO THE ALBUM BUT OMG IM SO EXCITED TO HEAR THE ONE THEYRE RELEASING TO ADVERTISE IT

I’m betting it’s either the Potatoe one or Dead and Gone

Hmmmmm

January 30th!!

Oh screw off siri

AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAIT IS DEAD AND GONE

YAYAYAYAYYAYAYAAYAYAYYAYAYYA

THIS EPISODE IS MT ABSOKUTE FAVORUTE THIS SEASON

#Dndads #dungeons and daddies #dndads spoilers #dndads s2 #I had to delete some of my key smashes so that i could post this within the key limit

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twilightmalachite · 4 months

Text

2×2 - Children on the Streets 11

Author: Akira

Characters: Yuuta, Hinata, Shinobu, Nagisa

Translator: Mika Enstars

"I, I bet I got a stomach ulcer stemming from the stress of all of Aniki’s bullshit."

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Season: Spring

Location: Back Alley in Downtown

Yuuta: Hm~… What’s the point of saying all this, Aniki?

Hinata: Hehe, just to tell you that you seem to feel inferior to me, Yuuta-kun, and that there’s no need for that. ♪

Apart from that, it’s to leave you wide open! Die, fool!

Yuuta: Ahh, shoot!! So you were talking all deep so you could catch me off guard?! Damnit~, shitty Aniki, how cowardly can you be!?

Hinata: Fuhaha~, howl, howl louder! It’s nothing but the bark of a losing dog!

Yuuta: Just what kind of character is this anyways!?

Hinata: I was thinking I need to look back a lot on my past, reevaluate it, and establish a new character for myself—

And not just as an indicator of how much Yuuta-kun has changed from what “we” were before. I have to establish my own character, too.

Otherwise, we’re just lacking something. As the two-in-one strongest and unbeatable individual, we were missing only the element of Yuuta-kun.

No, not that; we are going to get bigger and stronger!

Let’s show the world that we’re doing just that! My brother!

Yuuta: Right! I don’t get what you’re saying, but I know what you’re doing!

You’re talking about intriguing things like that again, waiting for me to lean in close to listen better, aren’t you!?

And then you’ll shoot me, right~? I’m not going to fall for that!

Hinata: Ahaha, not falling for it this time, huh~? See, Yuuta-kun? You’re learning and getting stronger and stronger! That’s why you’re my lifelong nemesis, fuhahaha! ☆

Yuuta: Seriously, what kind of character is this—

Hm?

Hinata: ? What’s up, Yuuta-kun? Is there trouble?

Yuuta: Urgh~… M-my stomach hurts.

I, I bet I got a stomach ulcer stemming from the stress of all of Aniki’s bullshit.

Hinata: Whaa!? A-Are you okay? I’m coming, Yuuta-kun~! Onii-chan will gently rub where it hurts!

Shinobu: Y-You mustn’t be fooled de gozaru, Hinata-kun! Although I did fall for the same! It’s possible that Yuuta-kun’s pretending to have a stomachache to make you worry and come out—

Yuuta: Oh come on, whose side are you on, Shinobu-kun?

Shinobu: H-Huh? But right now, I’ve turned into a zombie, which makes me Hinata-kun’s ally…!?

Yuuta: Right! But you are naive, did you think I simply would just mimic Aniki?

I’ve passed that point a long time ago, you know!

Shinobu: Huh? Huh? What do you mean by that…?

Yuuta: Ran-senpai! Now!

Nagisa: …Right. As everyone knows, this type of melee is Ran-senpai’s specialty.[1]

Shinobu: This is the first I’ve heard of that de goza-mphh! Uu, I’ve been shot in the face…!

It doesn’t hurt because it’s a water gun, but, my eyes! My eeeeyes~!

Nagisa: …S-Sorry? I’m shooting from a higher vantage point, so I’m at an angle where I can only aim for the head…

Heheh♪ You’ve got me de gozaru, but it is ninjas who are the expectations of sophistry in the first place! It is a common practice for us to deceive others, there is no such thing as bushido when it comes to ninjas…☆

Yaay! I’m properly acting like a ninja~! ♪

Hinata: Bakyuu~n! Bakyuu~n!

Nagisa: …Ah, h-he got me. I’ve been shot.

…I see. Shinobu-kun got me to lean out by making me worry.

Shinobu: Because there’s no other way for us to aim at you from our position, with you hidden somewhere so high up! ♪

Nagisa: …Right. Amazing. I’ve been beaten flawlessly.

…All the kids at ES are amazing. They are always learning and growing more and more.

Yuuta: However! We cannot allow justice to be defeated by evil! That would be a huge bummer for the program!

So, I’m gonna shoot and bring down Aniki who went after Ran-senpai!

This is game over, Hinata-kun!

This marks the end of this ridiculous game…!

[ ☆ ]

← prev | story directory | next →

Melee in Japanese is 乱戦 (ransen). It’s the same kanji used for Nagisa’s last name, too! (乱)

#2×2 #2x2 #yuuta aoi #hinata aoi #shinobu sengoku #nagisa ran #event #translation

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aislingsurrow · 24 days

Note

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

Aaaa I got tag-teamed! Thank you both Ube and @shibaikyatto!

Five things that make me happy....

I just got out of the shower, so let me say my Sleepy lotion from Lush! I like the soft, lavender scent and it makes my skin feel nice.

I don't want to pick one animal, so I'm gonna lump them all in on this one- all of my animals! Jackson, Marble, Chesapeake, Granite, aaaaaaand Yuri! They're all adoptees which makes me happy. Marble and Chesapeake, our two lady cats, chose US by coming up to our front door during a holiday and crying at us. On two separate holidays, at the same house, years and seasons apart. Marble we rescued during one of the coldest nights of the year just before New Years, and Chesapeake we saved during a party.... I think it was around Labor Day! We got the boy cats (Yuri and Granite) from folks who were looking to re-home them. And Jackson we got from a White German Shepherd Rescue! We think he's mixed with like Carolina Dog or smthn. He's just so..... he's so DOG. Like ask a kid to draw a dog and he's what they draw. Love those pets.

My favorite of all webcomic Unsounded which is an epic fantasy tale about a zombie and a girl with a tail and it updates M-W-F and it's about memory and life and death and morality and legacy and what it means to be alive and to live! I honestly feel like the FFXIV free trial meme whenever I talk about it lol. Of course, if anyone decides to check it out CONTENT WARNING CONTENT WARNING! It deals with hard topics including assault, murder, child abuse (both physical and sexual), rape, war, etc. I think it balances it all really well- I think the author doesn't revel in the shit that shouldn't be reveled in, and I think she has a good eye for empathy and humanity. Of course, with all things that are of this nature, your mileage may vary but if you can handle like Berserk I think Unsounded isn't too crazy.

I saw a post this morning that reminded me Dola Re Dola from Devdas exists so that makes me sooooooo happy hehehe time to listen to it and watch it again.

Honestly the fact that I'm getting stuff in my ask and my messages. Even though I get nervous and anxious every time I see the notification because of mental Illinois reasons, I'm happy to keep pushing myself to interact and connect with people, and I'm happy that people are reaching out! SO THANK YOU BOTH!!!

#ooc #ask meme #tag meme #ask game #tag game

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