#literally the way trust plays out for them is opposite and parallel

[edelgarfield]

gods i haven't seen this parallel drawn before but it is something that drives me insane

everyone knows gortash was sold to raphael by his parents and one can only imagine the awful things he went through. and like i don't think it's too far of a stretch to think that abuse plays a heavy role in what led him to bane, how do you avoid being owned and used for other people's gain? by being the one with all the power and bringing them under your heel.

which is the exact same logic that drives astarion towards ascension. hells, the rite is a contract with mephistopheles, raphael's DAD.

imo gortash is a glimpse of exactly what lies in ascended astarion's future. he's the most powerful man in baldur's gate but he's completely alone. he's sold out and alienated every single person that ever cared about him, his power is the very thing that keeps him from ever being able to trust anyone else, all his allies are transactional and based on mutual gain, and one slip up means a knife in his back. durge, seemingly the one person he genuinely cared about, was taken from him because of the power they held. their affection for him put a target on both of their backs. he had all the power he could ever want and it did nothing to save the person he cared about most.

by the time you meet him, he is far far far too gone imo. i'm not even sure whether he cares about how isolated he is, or if he sees it for the weakness it is. if there was ever a time to convince him to choose another path, it is long gone, now he's too entrenched in his own schemes, that even if he WANTED to change (unlikely), it would spell his death.

if you don't ally with him, his isolation is the very thing that kills him; he believes he has no need of flesh and blood allies bc he has an army of tin soldiers to keep him safe. but once you take out the steel watch he's practically defenseless. he's the most powerful man in Baldur's gate, but you can literally just stroll up to his office and kill him on his own turf and no one comes to his aid. if you do ally with him, it's his ambition that puts the final nail in his coffin, his means to dominate the world turns on him and spells his doom.

and this is exactly what we begin to see happen with ascended astarion. his obsession with power and need for control makes him turn a genuine partnership based on love & mutual respect into one based on control. from party banter, we see pretty much all the companions immediately turn on him. these are people who genuinely cared for him & fought for his freedom, but after watching him ascend they wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire. and he doesn't even care! he's so entrenched in his own misanthropic worldview that he only sees the power he's gained & not everything it cost him. the cost of ascension isnt just 7000 souls, it's 7000 souls and the love of every single person who could have ever cared for him.

if astarion ascends how long until he bites off more than he can handle? how long until his enemies realize the best way to get to him is through you? how long until all his allies turn on him? (if you choose to control the absolute, the answer is somewhere between a few days and a few weeks). all the power in the world can't protect you from your own hubris and astarion has it in spades.

whether you view durgetash & durgestarion platonically or romantically I see it as two opposing narratives held together with Durge as the lynchpin. durgetash is abt being doomed by that narrative, two people who genuinely cared for each other but were the wrong people at the wrong time to save either of them. had they met earlier, if one of them had been slightly less entrenched in their roles, perhaps they could have been saved, they could have lived and had something real.

& durgestarion is the opposite, had they met any earlier, they would have brought each other to ruin. two doomed people, once beyond saving, meeting at the perfect time and finding the strength in each other to break their chains, to choose a path for themselves. where before durge failed to save gortash (& every person they ever cared for) they can save astarion now (& all their other companions).

& the real tragedy is by the very constraints of the narrative, you cannot save them both. if durgetash hasn't been the people they were, Astarion would never have his chance at freedom, he would've been consumed in cazador's ritual with no one to mourn him. but in order to orchestrate the events that allow astarion his chance at freedom, gortash is long past the point of no return. it takes MULTIPLE extremely unlikely events and literal divine intervention to free Durge from Bhaal's clutches. The chance of the same happening for Gortash is infinitesimally small.

it's abt the cruelty and chaos of the world, how fate, destiny, and chance intersect to either bind us or set us free. it's abt second chances, walking through the ruins of your past mistakes & choosing to build something from the rubble, it's abt how love & loss are two sides of the same coin, how sometimes the only choice available is to love, & that love won't save you, but it's there and it leaves its mark.

thank you for coming to my tedtalk.

#baldur's gate 3 #astarion #enver gortash #durgestarion #durgetash #bg3 spoilers

[cirusthecitrus]

An interesting Hordak/Entrapta parallel i can't stop thinking about

At a certain point in their lives both of them 1) were exiled and basically sent to die by someone who was important to them and whom they fully trusted (a friend/family/god) 2) got stuck in a strange place, isolated from the rest of the world/universe, all alone (lol speaking of trauma bonds...)

Two very similar and yet very different situations. And here’s the fun part: the main difference between Entrapta and Hordak’s stories is the opposite ways in which they react to their opposite circumstances, cope with and adapt to new changes

Etheria, for all its problems, is a real place to live, while Beast Island is literally a deadly patch of deadly land where everyone dies a deadly death. And yet it’s Hordak who keeps trying to leave the place he got stuck in and return home, while Entrapta just… accepts her fate and stays to explore all the ancient tech lying around

No need to explain why Hordak spends 30+ years building a portal and dreams of his reunion with Prime. He has his moments of doubt tho, even before Entrapta became his reason to stay on Etheria “perhaps Prime was right... I am a failure” *. But after that he still keeps going, he’s not giving up. So, why isn’t Entrapta trying to escape from BI then? Why did she give up? 

She could try to build a boat and escape “Cast Away” style, with all the tech, materials and her abilities she could! And it’s not like the signal was affecting her as much to make her stay (i think, maybe the signal did play it’s part but it’s more interesting to discuss Entrapta’s actions within a scenario where it didn’t mess with her head much) Maybe she tried to save herself at first, maybe she was waiting, hoping for someone to come for her. But at some point, it seems, she stopped trying, stopped hoping. But why? Don't tell me it's all because of the tech >:(

Because what really was there for her back home? Were there people waiting for her, missing her, anyone who wished to have her around again? The princesses? No, she’s their enemy now (plus they treated her terribly even when they were on the same side so-). Her friends in the Horde? Not only did they send her on BI in the first place, none of them came back for her afterwards (in over a year), meaning it was not just a mistake. Their friendship was. She was a mistake. All what would be left for her is to return to Dryl and continue her work all alone, but how different would that be from her current situation?

Hordak too, was believed to be a “mistake”. A useless defect in his God’s eyes. And Horde Prime knows all, he’s always right, thus Hordak, despite trying to prove him wrong, somewhere deep down too believed that he was the problem and that he deserved to be treated like this. And yet he still wanted to return to Prime, still believed that he'd accept him, welcome him back if Hordak proved himself worthy. Hordak is fueled by this irrational, naive, almost childish hope. It gave him a goal in life, a path to follow, a reason to keep going. All while his blind faith and love for Horde Prime was so strong that it outshined and outweighed most if not all of the horrible memories he had from his time serving Prime (like, life in the Galactic Horde is a fucking nightmare and yet-). To Hordak, his whole life and meaning - his everything was somewhere out there outside despondos and he had to escape Etheria no matter what. And never did Hordak think that there might be life for him outside the Horde, a better life without his God (before he met Entrapta of course)

But with Entrapta, it seems, this hope was lost. Not right away, of course. Like I said, at first she might’ve tried to escape all by herself, then she prolonged her stay because of all the tech to explore and focused solely on her research. But perhaps the signal was getting louder and stronger and depressing thoughts would occupy her mind more often. That’s when the “the world outside Beast Island ceased to exist” theory might’ve come up in her head. To help her cope with the fact that it probably has been months and no one still came for her. Such an easy explanation, isn’t it? Of course no one has come for her - the outside world no longer exists! It's not like everyone has given up on her and no one even wonders where she's been all those months!

Okay this part is solely my speculations, u can call them headcanons even, but This theory could've been somewhat comforting even. It leaves the room to some nice warming thoughts - that her friends do want her back despite everything, just physically unable to reach her and get her home anymore. Just like it might've been comforting for Hordak to think that Prime could've already changed his mind. And if only he wasn't cut out from the rest of the universe, HP would search for him and come for him

But then Adora, Bow and Swift Wind show up to save her, proving that the outside world does in fact exist and so are other people, her friends she “had failed”. And if they’re all alive, that means they only never came for her because they didn’t want her back. And that’s when she could no longer resist the signal She gave up, got tired of giving chance after chance - mainly to herself. What’s the point of keep trying to befirend someone if the result is always going to be the same? In a way, Entrapta stopped living in "denial" (unlike Hordak*) and accepted “the harsh truth”

*Even those brief moments where Hordak questions his whole mission are never about Hordak realizing that Prime is Bad Actually, it's always Hordak thinking he is not worthy to return to Prime afterall. And it was the same with Entrapta. She didn't refuse to leave BI because she now hates the princesses or her allies in the Horde for how they treated her, but rather because "people who have given up on me were right" and she's not worthy to return to them and join their side (be it the Horde or the Alliance)

She made a decision to stay on BI because she was afraid of what eventually did happen to Hordak once he returned to the Galactic Horde - she feared that if she came back, all her doubts, fears and self-loathing thoughts would prove to be true. That she’s a failure and a weirdo, that she’s unwanted and despised by those she loves, that she’s a bad friend, that life outside literal murder island would be even more miserable for her 

[i swear these parralels are going to kill me one day]

The most tragic thing about Hordak’s story is that he was actively trying to leave this relatively safe place in wish to return to his cold uncaring abusive god and willingly continue living in literal hell. Because he desperately wanted to be accepted by the most important person in his life. (And was literally programmed to see this hell as the only acceptable way to live exist)

And the most tragic thing about Entrapta’s situation is that we know that there were people who were missing her, who loved her and cared for her enough to come to her rescue. Who would not allow her exile to happen in the first place had they found out sooner. But Entrapta didn't know that for sure and still wanted to stay on this deadly island. Because how was she to know that if she escaped BI and returned home, she would not be rejected or even... sent back to that island again?

#entrapta #hordak #entrapdak #spop #shera #spop meta #ramblings #screaming crying thinking about the purble gurl again.. #hope this makes sense

[noisemastter]

hi.... i am thinking about how much sweet capn nd k_k both parallel and r an antithesis of the fun gang ..... ok ? i think ......... i will mindlessly ramble . listen to me if you want . this may or may not be coherent at all . pay me no mind ok ?

they each have like,,, 1 basic trait thats described to them

okok so i think its really funny how much theyre complete fuckin opposites ( with the person they dance with ) .

kris - quiet person by susie and king

susie - mean girl by a save point

and yk . scc are energetic smooth and silly . its in their check dialogue . stated outright

ralsei - fluffy boy by a save point

energetic - quiet

smooth - fluffy

silly - mean

real interesting thing about capn and ralseis that isnt really important . . theyre both an adjective referring to a personality trait and a surface

ummm ill just go through them in sccs order . soooo,,, sweet / kris, cap / ralsei , and k_k / susie

sorry if this doesnt make sense im bad with words .

sweet / kris . . . . so much to say . mainly about sweet .

kris isnt shown to have much of a personality atleast in game ... which makes like a lot of sense considering they dont have free will for most of them . all we reaaally know is that theyre an introvert . theyre described as not being very energetic by tori, rarely ever waking up on time for school, usually sleeping through the start of class, and preferring tori drive them to school rather then walk . noelle also makes a comment about how kris isnt usually so talkative when you select the "anything" option in the hospital and as previously mentioned, theyre described as a quiet person

sweet on the other hand, is literally "the energetic one" . their movements are a lot more exaggerated and bouncier then the others, their way of speaking is a lot more upbeat then the others, and theyre the one who follows you around for ( most of ) cyber field ,,, they also have the most dialogue out of the 3 and are real passionate about their interests, being the most into the whole rebellion thing and likely being the one who started it all . they also use multiple exclamation marks in most sentences as a way of showing how enthusiastic they are about most things !!!!! this is a little small detail i noticed but.... they r also slightly off sync with the others whenever you ask them to play a song 4 you .

cap / ralsei,,,,,,, capsei shippers dee en eye you guys are weird

ough . i have so little to say about ralsei im sorry ralsei fans . ok anyways

ralsei is "the nice one" of the group i think . he tries to convince you to spare everyone, hes generally the most polite, and is maybe the tiniest bit naive in chapter 1, having to learn by the end that he cant trust everyone . even though hes nice, hes never exactly shown to be cowardly unlike most "nice" characters !!! he doesnt stand down to most enemies and is generally a lot less scared of . actual life threatening situations then a teenager should be .

cap'n on the other hand,,, is . the reason the game got a higher rating in japan because he says a statue looks like shit . capn is,,, from what ive seen, the least liked of the trio for coming off as rude in a lot of his dialogue ( hes just some guy i think ) . hes the most upfront about thinking you helped kidnap noelle, mocking you and making comments about it all throughout the first part of the game ( even trying to scam you because of it !!! ) . he also talks in a less formal way then ralsei does and makes several comments that are accidentally taken as flirty towards noelle ( hes just a little bit of a dumbass hes not a p/do . . targetted i see you freaks ) . hes basically shown to be willing to do anything if it benefits him and the others, trying to scam, trick, and appeal towards girls in an attempt to earn more money . hes also not a fan of fighting, and is reffered to as a coward by sweet for not really wanting to fight physically, even suggesting towards the start of the fight to just wait for other bad guys to come around . hes silly i love capn he reminds me of my best friend

cakes / susie .... i have so much to say about k_k you have no idea so many people get his character entirely wrong and it pisses me off . infact im breaking the pattern and starting with him because i have very little to say about susie and also fuck you

k_k is, in every way, kind of a doormat . they let people shortchange them, purposefully try and make themselves shorter to be less intimidating, and dont really wanna cause any trouble like at all . they try and make themselves sillier so they arent perceived as some sort of threat or something to be scared of ( considering theyre like 10ft tall . i did the math hes like 7 in his sprite and based on nelnals art, like 10'2 ) . hes the exact opposite of susie in every way !! k_k is tall and tries to make himself more approachable, giving you bagels for free if you dont have the money, trying to appeal to everyone by never really giving sweet or capn an answer that supports eithers argument, and just,, generally being a lot more polite then the other 2, despite the others best efforts . theyre also the first to try and cheer sweet up after they lose their battle, saying that they won because their dancing was better !!! a lot of trying to be smaller and appear as less mature likely comes from a place of anxiety,, as they only ever really speak whenever spoken to directly, try to stay on everyones good side, and have the least amount of dialogue out of the 3 by, like, 10%, most times them speaking being short, straightforward answers rather then them talking unprovoked

susie is,, kind of a smaller person trying to make herself seem bigger and scarier . she puts on a tough persona and is an asshole to most people who arent her friends, getting aggressive whenever people she perceives as threats bother her or the others and being a lot snarkier then the other 2 . towards ralsei and kris shes,, still pretty aggressive but its more in a playful way . she teases them often and is the only reason ralsei and her ever get an act option, because she points out how theyre not dumb and they can act by themselves . shes,, pretty much just any teenager with her friends

scc also think of themselves as the main characters . they make a constant attempt to act as so, trying to fight the fun gang because they think they helped the queen kidnap noelle, but in the end they just arent ,,, enough .

the fun gang r kinda just. kids who probably just wanna be kids but Cant because they kinda have this whole prophecy thing on their backs (susie and kris especially) and didnt really . choose to be the main guys .

i think,,, them being opposites is also a huge reason why scc being adults is so important to me . of course you can hc them as any age !!! but thinking of them as kids because theyre immature is,,,, boring as fuck . making them adults ties in a lot more with all of these opposites . thinking of them as adults who never really grew up would act as a sort of antithesis to the fun gang being teenagers who r growing up a little too fast and its soo... fun to play with . its fun to explore why they never matured like a lot of other people or if theyre just a little immature naturally !! theyre silly and theyre fun and theyre so entertaining to me i wanna put them under a microscope and study them ...

scc being adults who never grew up and the fun gang being teenagers who r growing up too fast is so fun to me i think . scc try so desperately to be the "main characters" . to be important . to be those guys . while the fun gang didnt even really try !!!! kris and susie just wanted to get chalk and got sucked into a huge prophecy thing in a world they didnt even know existed and i just . idk this is probably incomprehensible at this point sorry . i jusy think the fact theyre opposites is really fun and i dont think enough people notice it

tldr kris is quiet and introverted , sweet is energetic and ( likely ) loud judging from how they talk

ralsei is nice but not timid or cowardly at all, while a lot of capns dialogue is accidentally rude and hes literally called a coward ingame,

and susie tries to make herself bigger and scarier while k_k wants to be viewed as non-threatening and friendly as possible

thanks for listening to my autism rant . if you care .

#i dont know if i want to tag this or not . #maybe i will . just incase someones interested . #scc #sweet cap'n cakes #sweet capn cakes #deltarune #capsei shippers dee en fucking eye btw you all suck #sorry that was mean . but god some of you are insufferable #ralsei would hate capn but try and be nice about it and like slightly passive aggressive while capn would like. #piss him off on purpose because he thinks its funny to watch ralsei try and stay calm #do you get me here #fuck capsei

[fuckmylifeupplease]

Okay, don't get me wrong I love the take of wenclair giving Starfire and Raven vibes but may I present y'all with BBRae? Beastboy and Raven because the parallels y'all, no one cannot tell me they don't have the same vibes. I need a wenclair au now. I mean Wednesday getting referred to as a raven just set me off.

Guess I'm writing it once I actually have time for something other than work 💀

Opposites attract trope ✅

Cannot smiling + Barely cracks a smile ✅

Literal sunshine + Grumpy rain cloud ✅

Have they both ruined my life? ✅

They both learn a lot from each other but also firmly stay true to themselves. Him saving her in a sudden transformation as a beast from another beast. Having a heart to heart under the night sky. Raven being manipulated by a love interest for Beastboy to be there to let her know she's not alone and they hug. They had one of the sweetest damn platonic relationships and had such beautiful potential for a truly healthy relationship (and they do have one in other adaptations). The idea that "oh why can't they just be friends" was often thrown around with this ship. "Just friends" always sounds so damn dismissive to me as if friendships aren't that important. I've mentioned this before but as someone who is demiromantic, that emotional bond is very important to me. It should be important for any relationship really, because some of the most loving relationships that last occur when the couple is first friends then lovers. Even if the close friendship never turns into something romantic that bond's importance does not diminish, love is powerful and doesn't always need to be sealed with a kiss, it can be sealed with a hug. If Wenclair becomes canon freaking amazing, beautiful, love to see it. Slow burn all the way even, i wanna see how their friendship continues to build, all their dynamics, the slow realization of what they mean to each other and if that turns romantic poetic cinema. And if it doesn't, that's okay too. But dear God Wednesday as a character needs that emotional growth with a partner, especially after this season. I cannot accept another love interest if it is not built on strong emotional grounds for her because honestly, this is Wednesday Addams we're talking about. A show focused on her needs to build her very careful and I think they did that beautiful with Enid as well as her friendship with Eugene. Eugene is a very sibling like bond and I absolutely love that for her. She goes out of her way to visit him at the hospital and even opens up in his presence because it's comforting. And Enid, just wow, she truly managed to gain Wednesday's trust. And same for her. That hug being the climax of the series and not a romantic kiss just spoke to me. I can't wait to see how their friendship grows. If romance is to bloom, I'd be happy with Season 2 end being a realization of what their bond means to each other, Season 3 subtle mutual pining and treading waters, Season 4 canon at the start finally and a lovely full season of them figuring their relationship out whilst adventuring together. That way we get a proper romantic development between the two that isn't rushed in the last season or just the last episode and realistic for Wednesday's character, whilst not risking Netflix cancelling the show (precautionary but at this point it really does feel like Netflix just cancels anything with canon wlw).

I also am for queerplatonic relationship wenclair, trust me my aroace spec self loves this idea too 😭 just saying how I'd love to see it play out if they went with romance. (Still have my sapphic demiromantic asexual Wednesday HC 👌🏽✨ )

Lastly, I leave y'all with this.

Corporate needs you to find the difference between this picture and this picture:

#wenclair #wednesday addams #enid sinclair #wednesday x enid #enid x wednesday #wednesday netflix #bbrae #wednesday series #i need to punch a wall too many emotions rn #someone help #we got a slow burn incoming i can feel it #slow burn wenclair

[dragonsrfire]

A Study of Buddy and Some Other Notes on Baby Driver - 2017

I watched Baby Driver a while ago. It is the type of film that is a feast for the eyes. But I couldn't help but look at the masterpiece for its symbolism. I've seen a lot of discourse on how the color palettes are symbolic of internal conflicts of characters and their fates. I want to use this vlog to specifically talk about a number of thing pertaining to the character of Buddy (played by Jon Hamm)

I did not expect him to become the man he was at the end of the film. But I think there were clues just scattered all around the film that foreshadowed his fate. So, here's my take on the symbolism that is associated with this specific character. I'll also introduce the color palette as I go along the way.

For context, Jason 'Buddy' van Horn used to work in Wall Street as a banker. He becomes a thief and when we meet him he is married to Monica 'Darling' Costello

I'll be discussing the symbolism in relation to the following, 1) The Name 2) The Color Palette 3) The parallel scene with Baby

THE NAME - I loved how we had aliases for all the characters. The names were always cover ups for who they truly were. Darling for instance was fierce, feminine and very much a fem fatale. I always thought that Buddy was a take on the buddy cop trope. At first it sounded absurd in my head but I think a lot of the things we see later on contributes to this interpretation. Initially, he is friendly towards Baby and he warms up to him and shares a lot about himself with him (taste in music - his obvious likes and dislikes). Buddy uses this trust to keep things going. Later on, we see this peel away. We get to see what's lurking behind the name Buddy.

THE COLOR PALETTE - Buddy is associated with one color at the beginning of the film. The color is blue and it juxtaposes Darling's pink hues. The color portrays him as a cool yet masculine character, who comes with a partner (Darling - Blue and Pink as opposites attract).

But Darling points out the significance of another color. Red. Blue and Red immediately reminded me of the colors we associate with the police. Also I feel like the significance of all of that was kept at bay by Darling. Red is never out of the picture, it's always lurking behind and in front of him.

And at the end of the day there is literally no blue for him. Darling is out of the picture and the red that has boiled over everything erupts, giving us the truth that has been hiding beneath the cool blues.

I also made the connection between Buddy being a literal Buddy cop. There's something beyond the cool and collected personality. I think it was all triggered when Darling was killed off - she was the one who helped him to keep the balance - she guided him in many scenes and they shared a dynamic. Yes, they were unhinged and Darling was unrealistic but they kept each other in balance. When she is gone, we get a lot of closeups of Buddy, and many of the lights on him are red.

Red is his truth and something that was boiling beneath the blue and the name 'Buddy'. But it was kept in check.

Here are some other uses of red in the film and my takes on the purposes.

A color love Foreshadows fates. Red as something and new beginnings. that boils around

Red as Buddy's truth. Now blue is in the background (the façade is put aside) and he fully encapsulates the color that boiled around them. From cool blues to deep red (a fragile lie that was cracked to reveal the impact of trauma)

I also think that it's really cool that you can almost see hints of pinks before the full red. He still remembers Darling but soon everything is taken over by the one thing Darling warned Baby about.

#baby driver #cinematography #colors #red and blue

[chihirolovebot]

!!!NEW CHAPTER I'M SQUEALING LIKE STEAM POPPING OUT OF A TEAPOT!!

Gosh I love your writing so much, it's always so well worth the wait <3 your imagery is second to none I stg,

"You were full of stones drifting down to the riverbed, watching the shimmering surface recede before you, powerless to stop it."

Like -- ugh, I literally can't conjure up the right way to describe that reading your work doesn't really feel like reading at all with how submersive it is. As always, your characterization is straight from the game canon. The way you subtly show Miu's struggle as the weight of what she's about to do is starting to crush her is just so delicious, I'm sick and clutching my chest. I was reading Kiibo's and MC's argument and literally thinking about how it so easily parallels Kokichi's relationship to the MC in terms of trust and keeping secrets. It's oddly satisfying in the most angsty of ways seeing the MC on the opposite side of that coin now, y'know? Now THEY are the one doing questionable things to protect that sweet, innocent-eyed individual they call a friend, one that undoubtedly deserves their trust and is begging for them to do so. Corruption arc for the reader??? A little hint of one anyway??? Their loyalty to those they care about is getting ground up into both a virtue and a flaw because of the circumstances and I am EATING it up. Also, them wanting to try to stop Miu in their own way but struggling to do so with just conversation?? I love them so much it hurts :((((((

And and and, knowing how this case originally goes, I saw that; I saw that tiny, eensy weensy little detail you changed, my hand went to cover my mouth and my mind is now BURNING with curiosity as to how these next couple updates are gonna go. I'm on the edge of my seat, leaning so far forward that I might fall off even.

I don't remember if I mentioned it last time, but I absolutely LOVE the overhaul of Tenko's character. She was one of my least favorites when playing V3 originally, mostly because I was really upset with how they executed their (kinda) first openly lesbian character, twisting her potential into some lesbophobic caricature that's creepily obsessed with fetishizing Himiko. But oh, how you've kept her close enough of the original to keep her feeling like the same character, but managed to save her potential, fleshing out her character, combined with her design update just gives me life; yours is now the canon Tenko and I will NOT be taking criticism or hearing otherwise~~

The moment between Kokichi and the reader right before they started to put on the helmets?? Faints. I literally can't say enough how you have absolutely NAILED this relationship and his character in general. Sometimes reading Kokichi fics, people make it all about the lying thing, but they don't really ever go into the depth of WHY he lies so much or the other aspects of his character, like his distrust in other people and his seeming lack of attachment or reliance on them, his hatred of killing and the desire to protect people in his own way going hand in hand. Sobs and shakes his stupid little purple head. He is such an excellent morally grey character, and you execute every scene with him perfectly. Also, you can tell his walls are STARTING to come down the reader now that he's let them in, his touches getting a tad more affectionate, it somehow feels like there's more weight behind his silly little flirtatious quips now-- my heart races with the MC at the smallest things like him holding their hand

I am so excited to see if the reader can manage to get under his skin enough in time to save him before these flaws of his lead to his downfall, or if Kokichi's influence leads to an even stronger corruption of the MC's character as they try to help him and get them both killed in the process, or I could even see the reader eventually sacrificing themselves for him and opening up his eyes in the worst way possible what his actions have led to. No matter what, I'm going to love every moment of it~

You've created such a wonderful story here Vee, I still remember stumbling across it and clicking on the title in curiosity, and now you've got me and countless others in a chokehold with every update. I know you've fallen on seriously tough times recently, because of course, life just does that to you sometimes, and even though you're doing better for now... you've got a village, a lil community behind you, and we all love you and are here for you if you need anything~ Please take as much time as you need between updates, and pls pls take care of yourself -wraps you in a blankie and pets your head and makes you cocoa or tea or whatever you want- you deserve it, I'm probably gonna wind up rereading the newest chapt again tonight to catch the other little things I might have missed~ and I know I've said it already, but taking care of yourself also means you never have to reply to my literal essays born from love and brainrot for this fic, I have WAY too much to say as it is haha, and I know it can be emotionally exhausting trying to come up with responses sometimes (*˘︶˘*).｡*♡

Thank you for another amazing chapter, I'm biting my hand eagerly waiting to see what comes next. Take care and have a good weekend~~!!

LOVE OKAY hi. HI. i did want to respond 2 this earlier but i got sick very shortly after (covid rip) and now i feel ok enough to look at a screen i am finally getting around to it (i know u think i do not have to respond but i simply do) !

first of all. thank u so much as always!!! my brain literally short circuits when i see these comments/asks like u do not know how insane ur making me /pos.

the mc stuff these last few and future chapters make me feel so Evil.... like yes maybe they do go a little insane and degenerate. and ofc ur spot on with the parallels of mc/kiibo with kokichi/mc n im happy that was obvious bc i was kinda stressing abt it when i was writing it hehe i was like 'uhghghg how to show that the nature of the killing game intentionally warps the actions of a well-meaning person trying to protect those they care about which only ends in their classmates fearing and distrusting them hhhdhdhshsjhsdh pulls out my own hair.' as for the corruption arc.... hm. Hm. also this 'Their loyalty to those they care about is getting ground up into both a virtue and a flaw because of the circumstances' HELLO??? this is a gorgeous way to describe it im literally staring . lurking n stalking over this. and that's just it!!! loyalty is an osentibly good trait to have but during a killing game where the only way to help ur classmates is to make them distrust u.... god. it's a flaw in the sense that it makes mc's friends doubt and grow frustrated with them, but of course it's a virtue in that mc IS doing all they're doing for them!!! pain and agony.

also the miu stuff was very fun to write. i love miu, she's probably myyyy fourth favourite? from v3? gonna say cautiously bc my rankings change all the time but she's definitely up there, moreso for the potential she could've had in the main game. it always burned me that the only depth she ever really got was like. AFTER her death? and told through the grapevine no less. there's such an interesting parallel in her character to kokichi and it sucks it wasn't explored more i think. i hope i made her a little more of a Person in this fic even if i didn't focus on her as much as the others.

tenko. oh tenko. talk abt characters with a ton of potential that got done SO Dirty by the source matieral. it was all right there ! and they just made her into a predatory lesbian and killed her at the peak of her character development as they love to do (sideyes hiyoko and taka). yeah i definitely consciously took out all the lines that made her look like a weirdo. i think her openly liking himiko a lot would be enough to make someone like himiko uncomfortable WITHOUT tenko being weirdly predatory and fetishing her so. that's what i did. new tenko is just openly admirative of himiko which still makes her uncomfy but for like. better reasons i guess. and now they get a chance to actually DEVELOP their relationship instead of another bury ur gays ur whatever.

GODDDD kokichi breaks my heart man. and ur so right that a lot of fics that write him don't delve into the 'why' of his character. every line i write for him i think to myself, okay, what is he ACTUALLY feeling right now? would it make sense for him to say this, does it align with his end-goal, is it ooc for him to reveal this much? PLUS having to keep in mind all the tactics he uses in general conversation, like poking people in the right direction for answers without straight up telling them, or saying something absurd or flustering them to change the topic or divert someone's attention away from something. basically behind every line of dialogue he says u gotta be thinking in terms of the bigger picture, when u don't so much for the rest of the characters. im sure thats also something u get, writing for nagito!! bc he's also a super complex character with a lot of weight behind all his lines. definitely feels like a guy who everything he says tells u a little bit about him if ur looking closely!!

last part of this made me a lil emotional uh oh. thank u so much love, i appreciate it so so much. btw i LOVE replying to these n the longer and more nonsensical the better /gen thank u thank u thank u again (ps i saw the final piece had updated yesterday but i havent gotten around to reading it yet!! im planning on setting some time aside this evening so get ready for another stupid novel comment ehehe)

pls take care of urself!! i hope ur having a good day <333

#<3.love #dear venus. #🏚.sleep awake

[elvendorx]

please tell me your thoughts on your fav iteration of Lily and Horrible Boy (or Lily and Regulus)

Omg thank you for this ask. I’m still fairly new to actively creating for lily/regulus but I have loved and appreciated them individually and together for a long time. Coincidentally they go perfectly alongside j/s as well, there are no duds in that foursome, there is endless crossover, I just love it. It’s also fairly unusual for me to get into a ship where we don’t know whether the characters ever interacted. I’m usually a “these characters interacted and we know it was significant but I haven’t seen enough of it” shipper. But Lily and Regulus are special in that I loved them both individually first, and they at least existed in the same spheres at the same time with people in common. All I need is the potential and the more you look I think the more potential you can find in lily/reg.

For example they have a lot of parallels: they’re both the younger sibling in a family where there are two same-sex siblings, they both have contentious relationships with their siblings or at least in Sirius and Regulus’ case we know they were on opposite sides of the war. There are these fundamental differences between magical/Muggle sibling and blood supremacist/anti-supremacist sibling that I think would be a strong point of relation between Lily and Regulus - frustration with their sibling, annoyance, anger, missing them and wishing things could be different. And then there’s the added layer of complication with Lily being on the same side of the war as Regulus’ sibling, and I love the tension between being able to relate on a personal level but having this ideological barrier still up to some extent, even if you go for Regulus as a complete convert to Muggle tolerance. But I also think that within their sibling dynamics, they play opposite parts: Sirius and Lily are the more rebellious, less traditional ones within their family units, Regulus and Petunia follow tradition more closely etc. Again: so much potential. 

I also get strong self-imposed loner vibes from them both, partly because of the sibling thing. We are given the impression that Lily is quite sociable, but we also see her shun and sever ties with people a lot considering that she doesn’t appear that much as an active character. And then you’ve got Regulus who is in Slug Club, who was on the Quidditch team so quite socially involved too, but who makes arrangements so that it’s almost impossible for anyone to find out for sure that he died and the circumstances of it unless they specifically know where to look, which they wouldn’t. Harry discovering it is a complete coincidence and it took 18 years. So I just love the concept of these two proud loners coming together and being able to explore how that manifests as a dynamic. 

Really it’s Lily’s tolerance of Snape that really lays the groundwork for any potential tolerance of Regulus, but as I mentioned somewhere else I do think Lily has this curiosity and sense of intrigue that leads her to tolerate questionable men specifically. I think there are many ways that the Muggleborn/former Death Eater issue could play out between Lily and Regulus and I love that. It could resolve positively, and if so how do they get there? And it could be tragic and just not resolve either :( If it resolves, does Regulus reconsider his views because of Lily’s abilities? Because of Lily teaching him? Is there a scenario where Lily has some involvement in catching young potential recruits before they’re radicalised and is Regulus one of them? (Literally just thought of that one idk) Would Lily forgive him? Would she trust him? Does she meet Regulus through Sirius and feel sympathy for Sirius losing his brother to extremism and try to step in?

I’m getting in danger of waffling but there’s also Slug Club potential! So the crossover in setting is there, they have people in their circles in common, and I think both in their circumstances and in their personalities, there’s just so much interesting crossover to explore. And that’s all I need for non-canon interactions, I need the potential to be there, I need it to be in character and feasible even if there’s some slight reshuffling, it’s the openness and willingness and evidence of points of commonality within the characters.

I also think that a key part of Lily’s character that I always jump to and tap into is her anger and impulsiveness and even meanness (love me some female rage) and I think that it would remind Regulus of Sirius (lol) and he would know how to deal with it, it wouldn’t really phase him, whereas everyone else we see Lily call out and snap at in canon (Petunia, Snape, James) gets upset and ruffled by it, and I think that would throw Lily to find someone outwardly collected and calm, when she’s potentially used to lashing out and people reacting in shock and Lily being vindicated in her argument by their retreating responses?

In terms of Lily’s horrible boy thing, I think Regulus is a different kind of horrible boy to Snape and James. You could argue that the horrible boy thing is because she wants to do better and be better but I think Regulus would be more of a puzzle to solve, a theory to understand, than a fixer-upper to just direct onto the straight and narrow. I also don’t see Regulus hiding from who he is, his associations, his actions whereas both Snape and James are very defensive and a bit dishonest about what they’re really doing (in SWM, at least). I also love the potential for Lily and Regulus to change each others’ perspectives, or to have an exchange of views that sort of bring them together to meet in the middle. Lily is quite righteous and she has strong convictions hence her intense reactions and you’ve got Regulus willing to die to bring someone down and I don’t see either of them backing down or giving in super easily.

The more I think and read and look into these two together, the more crops up and things slots together and I need to do it more often. Also I love Sirius&Regulus interactions and I love platonic James&Lily interactions so I’m essentially bound to write more Lily/Regulus in and of themselves and probably alongside j/s as a default because I don’t think I can physically write Regulus and not also bring up Sirius and vice versa. I have a j/s coffee shop au that’s been long in the works and I need to update it to fit my updated characterisations etc but there’s a strong probability I’m shoving Lily and Regulus together in that. Or I’ll write a l/r accompaniment if not, I’m sure. Also a rip-off of living in the red where they housesit for j/s but that only exists in a one sentence summary form rn. Anyway I’ve said potential way too many times in one space so I’m just going to stop typing. PSA that I’m always always open to being thrown regulily content (I even use the portmanteau and I pretty much only refer to ships in the old character a/character b way). 

Thanks again for the ask! <3

#ask #regulily #regulus black #lily evans

[kiss-my-freckle]

As I said before, 1x11 to 1x14 is written around Elena's fear of Damon. That's why Elena goes from "This is kidnapping" to actually being kidnapped. From Bonnie's locator spell to Sheila's. Noah’s hoodie to Ben's. Damon not compelling Elena to Ben thinking he compelled Elena. Damon playing the white knight to Stefan playing the white knight. 

Best to view Stefan and Bonnie opposite Damon and Elena, and at the same time, view Stefan opposite Sheila. It's the only way for me to explain the parallels, which go like this..

Stefan destroys what Damon/Elena built in 1x11. Sheila destroys what Stefan/Bonnie built in 1x11. Stefan withholds from Elena.  Sheila withholds from Bonnie. 

This pulls in 1x3, as Elena invited Damon into her home. 

"Waiting for Elena to invite me in." "Literally. The one who opens the door."

Stefan tries to act as a seal on Elena's house. "Some seals keep vampires from entering." Sheila hides the truth about the seal on the tomb. "This one keeps them from coming out."

The parallels end with Damon and Sheila.

Stefan knocking on Sheila's door. “You know what I am. And yet you offered me your hand, which means you wanted me to see that I can trust you.” Damon knocking on Sheila’s door. “You got some nerve knocking on a Bennett witch's door and asking her for anything.”

Elena helps Damon without regard to how Stefan feels about it. "We can't leave him in there. We promised him. Both of us." Bonnie helps Stefan without regard to how Sheila feels about it. "Help me or I'll do it alone."

This is what happens with their 1x11 split, with Damon choosing to build his trust in Elena instead of Bonnie. Bonnie’s trust is built in Stefan, Elena’s trust is built in Damon. Bonnie’s trust in Damon comes later, as she isn’t the head of their circle of friends, Elena is. Damon essentially formed a friendship with the leader of the pack when he formed a friendship with Elena. 

Sheila ultimately dies because she thought she could desiccate Damon just as Stefan tried to do in 1x5. Because she and Stefan withheld information. Bonnie loses her Grams because she refused to give Damon the talisman when he asked for it. "I'd like it back, please." And refused to give it to him even though she believed it to be his. She also loses her Grams because, like Elena, she's blind to the reality of just how equal these brothers are. The vampire killing device is written opposite Emily’s talisman.

“No. You're not gonna hurt her, Damon. Because deep down inside, there is a part of you that feels for her.”

“You won't kill her.”

Stefan knows Damon can’t compel Elena, and he knows he won’t kill her, yet he doesn't want Damon in her life no more than Sheila wants Damon in Bonnie's. Unlike Sheila doing it to keep Bonnie safe from Damon, Stefan does it because either he wants Elena all to himself... or he wants to continue controlling the narrative on their past... just as he tried to desiccate Damon for the sake of hiding the fact that he’s a vampire. 

“Now nothing can come between you and Elena. Except the truth.”

And Stefan does just that... continues withholding from Elena. Unfortunately for Stefan, he either gives Elena the truth... or Damon will. 

A reason Caroline is written opposite Vicki. Caroline becoming a vampire is on both Damon and Bonnie, just as Vicki’s death is on both Damon and Stefan. 

[todayisafridaynight]

OKOKOK EP TWO AND THREE CLEARED. Keisuke is unbeatable I Am Positive I kept fucking pausing to GIF this and that and I swear I've never had this many GIFs on the hard drive 😭😭I need to hunt him for sport [AFFECTIONATE] Pleeeease drop the Cutest Tsutsumi Characters list... I must know...

DON'T REMIND ME OF TSUTSUMI'S POSSIBLE RETIREMENT I'LL MISS HIM SO BAD 😭😭😭😭😭that aside :] he's a nice man I respect him :] To Say The Least... OH BUT he did some dialect work in Kagerou Touge [only as the transgender chicken he plays not his actual character], Bali Big Brother, Tonbi, First Penguin, and uhhhh Jo's Singular Line LMAO [not all Kansai exactly IIRC but more Kansai-adjacent than Kanto]. Kagerou and First Penguin are my faves though methinks

DEFINITELY CHECKING OUT THE MOVIE WHEN I GET THE CHANCE... very intrigued about how it does things differently and of course the Snap Seal Of Approval means a great deal to me...

Kase is SUCH a bitch in the anime and manga perhaps especially Because he did have potential as a voice of reason but he's just being a hypocrite and abusing his knowledge of the situation; he's able to justify it only because he's Not Forty-Five Which Would Be Creepy But Twenty-One Is Fine Dude Trust Me which... is pretty real NGL guys like that do exist... in the same vein, on one hand I do want him to face some sort of consequence, but on the other hand I guess it's also pretty real for him to be able to get away with it. I Guess.

If nothing else I do really appreciate that episode for the contrasts between how Kase and Kondo act on [basically] the same "date," and how Akira reacts. Like OBVIOUS what the message of the ep is given Akira's thing with the pamphlets but let me cook... 'Cause Kase is conventionally attractive, he's not [as far] out of her age range [although he's still DECIDEDLY out of it], and a lot of girls who don't know any better would be thrilled to be pursued by a "cool mature guy" like him, but Akira cannot stand any of it. But with Kondo, the complete opposite, who is totally unattainable, she feels safe and comfortable.

Even so, she re-enacts Kase's behaviors on her "date" with Kondo, because that's what she knows and kids mimic the adults in their lives whether they know it or not, and it's largely by her own self-restraint that she doesn't go in for that kiss at the end and things don't end as badly as they could... MANY thoughts... head full...

BUT YEAH. NO. YEAH. The last couple eps go SO hard and for WHATTTTT 😭😭😭😭😭Haruka and Akira got me so fucked up... Haruka winning that black cat for her coinciding with Akira starting to back off from Kondo and rekindle things with Haruka instead... the rumor WAS real... uuuuugggggghhhhhhhhhhh

And CHIHIRO MY FRIEND CHIHIRO good god spending the whole fucking show thinking Kondo was just reminded of his wife or some girl-who-got-away by Akira... and then he picks up the book and It's No Help because Chihiro is a gender neutral name... AND THEN TURNS OUT IT'S HIS BOY BEST FRIEND REPRESENTING HIS YOUTH AND HIS PASSIONS AND IT'S ALL IN PARALLEL TO HARUKA AND AKIRA UUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OK that is enough for now I promise I will actually send in something RGG-related at <3 Some Point <3 SORRY to anyone having to scroll past these last couple of asks lmao

THATS WHAT IM SAYING literally my number one selling point for this show at this point is Keisuke Is The Cutest Old Man In Media Ever Please Witness Him. on the subject of Cute Men though the Cute Tsutsumi Chara list is relatively small since most of his roles evidently has him p serious or. Heinous. so like. top five's like:

1.) Keisuke (Tsuma, Shogakusei ni Naru) 2.) Saenai (Super Salaryman) 3.) Nobata (Not Quite Dead Yet) 4.) Ikegami (Why Don't You Play in Hell) 5.) Tsugaru (Hero SP)

a very hard list for me to make considering i think he has plenty of cute roles (if not just cute moments) in one way or another but..... thems the ones that had me going (´◡`ʃ♡ƪ) the most..

BUT WHAT DO YOU MEAAAN NOT TO REMIND YOU YOU TOLD ME ABOUT IT FIRST (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) an important thing to remember anyhow.. maybe in the future he can direct movies that feature other cute middle-aged men (❁´◡`❁) greatly doubt any others will ever compete with The Paragon Of Middle-Aged Dudes but they can try...

you had me at Trnsgender Chicken huh. OH BUT YEAH i figured hiroshi was kansai-esque with his mannerisms/speech. bali big brother was one of the movies on my To-Watch list so i know what to look into this week now (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)

OH BUT I THOUGHT YOU SAW THE MOVIE i watched it ahead of time because of that ☠️☠️ BUT i look forward to you checkin it out !! again its p different tonally in some parts, esp with the vibe to haruka and tachibana's relationship (tho of course the underlying issue of their rocky friendship still exists, its just not as evident as it was in the anime).

AH BUT YEAH i appreciate kase for what he does as a narrative device and as a character in THAT regard i really like him: serving as a cautionary reality for people like tachibana who could be taken advantage of if around the wrong people while he simultaneously acts as though he knows what's best for her (and again, he has a point in her and kondo's age difference being egregious, but he's not exactly sailing on smooth waters either). with that in mind i appreciate that aspect of him didn't overstay it's welcome (for multiple reasons of course LMAO)

NOOO BUT HARUKA AND TACHIBANA'S RELATIONSHIP MENDING BY THE END THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING TOO especially when they showed off haruka had her lil cat bro hanging on her bag.. and it was that hot-pink color to balance out the black one tachibana had (very kuromi/melody core if you ask me).... it really was super sweet that kondo and haruka got to mend their past relationships by the end of the anime like AAA it was SOOO good the build up and execution and eveything.. and i LOVE how the anime ends with the implication kondo and tachibana will start to really work on their aspirations- i always like those endings more than the ones where we see them already succeeding (❁´◡`❁)

AND YEYEYE THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT THE BUSINESS WITH CHIHIRO WAS GONNA BE TOO !!!!! IT WAS DEFINITELY INTENTIONAL ME THINKS LIKE ugh... AtR is masterful as all hell for everything it does i truly loved it a lot...

#long post #snap chats #my seal of approval is worth something... and what if i said Teehee LMAOO #BUT i do hope you enjoy it (❁´◡`❁) it might not have tsutsumi in it but yo oizumi certainly does a great job as kondo me thinks #with it being live action and Just A Sprinkle more serious than the anime tachibana isn't as comedically explosive anymore #but she can still be curt. i was a lil upset that yoshizawa and nishida didnt keep their cute relationship #but again i get it.. we only have so much time and we dont wanna bounce around with the focus #again there are some changes that made me like. Hm. BUT nothing i hated #LIKE HOW THEY CUT OUT TSUBU LIKE NOOOOOO MY LIL MAN..... but ill live i suppose.... #and again there were changes i DID enjoy- like for one thing i like how tachibana's mom is actually here LMAO #but ill save all that for when you finish the movie 🤭 i hope you enjoy ! and i hope you enjoy the rest of tsuma ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶ #moving on... ye neednt tell me how you respect mr tsutsumi... i am aware no worries friend.. #with that in mind it is hard makin my Cute Tsutsumi Charas list... #'snap you put ikegami on the list' i did. because he was cute and silly and just a lil quirky #i was gonna put hiro on the list but then i remember how most of the time i wanted to hit him with a trout #he's still cute to me tho but tsugaru's just a flavor of awkward that i really thinkg is endearing #hiro's cute in that he's a stubborn old man who's still earnest. also he loves his wife and Wife Guys always get points #but alas... his wife isn't around anymore so we don't get to see that much.. have to deduct some of those points... #i also thought toru (pure) was cute but he's more Brooding cute and his cutest moments are with yuka #and i wanted to keep the list limited to Cute Mostly On Their Own #BUT ANYWAY. ENOUGH OF THAT BEFORE I GO ON TOO MUCH. #i couldnt find any of the other kansai-infused media.. i tried looking for tonbi but i wasnt sure which one he was in #and when i checked the cast list of either of them i didnt find him credited.. i COULD just check his imdb but. laziness is an illness yk.. #potentially lying on the bali plans too... KA only has the raw footage but i COULD try to 47 Ronin In Debt my way through it...

[calliopecalling]

QOTS Rewatch - 3x11 - Diez de Copas

This episide is NOTHING BUT PAIN. It's one of the most painful episodes of the entire series to me. I did not enjoy rewatching it 😂 Even though I know it all turns out okay it's like--this episode is where it really starts to tank for Teresa. I mean I guess 3x10 really was where it started to tank and this is the one where the tanking accelerates and really shows how bad it's going to be. I don't like it. I don't like watching her suffer, or James suffer; I don't like seeing her past coming back to haunt her in a way that it is so damaging to herself and her happiness. It's just so painful and not the pain of 2x11 or 2x12 either, where it's so hard watching her walk away from James and then watching James walk away from her but you can still admire her strength. In this episode though, it's almost like her strength is exactly what gets in her own way and it's not something to admire, but more to pity, or even (if you're a less generous person towards her than I am, lol) to resent. Like maybe if she were a little softer, she wouldn't have isolated herself away from James so devastatingly. But... that's not who she is. Not at this point in her trajectory.

Soooo because it's so painful, I'm genuinely going to try to keep this shorter than usual. I've said most of what I want to say about it in gifset tags already and I'll just rehash a few of them here in one place. I don't even want to go through my usual bullet list of basic series of events in the episode because IT HURTS OKAY.

So here's the first thing I want to say about the terrible pain.

I BLAME KELLY ANNE AND POTE.

Seriously. Kelly Anne may be a pitiable creature and surely she's not "strong" in the way Teresa is strong but for her to sit there, James having outed her as the mole, and try to insist to Teresa that her feelings for James were blinding her? Fuuuuuuuck no ma'am. She was definitely put in a terrible position by Devon so I could've forgiven her for falling for his bullshit, even though it almost got Teresa killed. But I can't forgive her for sitting there trying to blame James, and Teresa's feelings for James. (If she hadn't lied so egregiously to Teresa there, I think Teresa might've actually spared her, too.) It's just a whole other layer of appalling. As Teresa says to her: "I trusted you. I don't trust anyone." 😭 First horrible thing about this episode then: it makes Teresa--the one who has already admitted to not being able to trust people--even less likely to trust anyone.

And Pote. FUCKING POTE. Pote is just not smart. He is muscle. He does not deserve to be involved in any strategizing or for Teresa to seek his counsel in any serious matters. I feel like it should've been fairly easy for him (but it obviously wasn't) to use his rational brain, the one that Teresa doesn't have access to because she's in trauma response mode, to be like hmm, let's see, there are numerous people around who might have access to Teresa. Yes, James is one. So is Kelly Anne. So is Charger. So is Lil T. Taza. Etc. Not that I want to go around pointing fingers at innocents, but Pote needed to use his rational brain to be like, hmmm, James is Mr. Loyalty himself, so does it really make sense for him to be the mole? Or at least, does it make any more sense for it to be him than any of the others?

I mean: the surface answer here is yes, it does make more sense for it to be James. I think their assumption is that the mole would have to be someone in the inner circle and would have to be someone really smart and really skilled at deception. Obviously James meets two of those three qualities, and if he were the mole, he would've clearly been really skilled at deception, too. But as I said in my tags on this gifset, rationally, it just doesn't add up for James to be the mole. James has consistently displayed that loyalty is his number one value. Above all else, he has integrity with respect to his sense of duty and honor to the person he serves. This is why (as I interpret what the source material has to say about the original tracker issue) he ultimately used the tracker on Teresa in season 2--because he worked for Camila, and Camila ordered him to track Teresa down. As soon as he did, he resigned, because he couldn't any longer reconcile working for a woman whose enemy was the woman he'd accidentally fallen in love with. And then he showed up to work with Teresa and everything he's ever said on the matter just reinforces how important loyalty is to him. (It also makes me remember his comment to Guero in 2x06, "you have no idea what loyalty is.")

So for Teresa and Pote to suspect him of being the mole, they are going wildly out of character in their interpretation of James, lol. For Teresa, it's an emotional hot button issue. She sees the tracker in Bolivia and all her alarm bells go off. I can't blame her for that. But I think she did start to back off it, I think she did realize she was wrong (like in the car scene with Pote, waiting for James to show up to their trap) and yet Pote dug in his heels. Pote who had allll the same information Teresa did and yet who couldn't possibly fathom anyone other than James would be capable of betraying Teresa. Pote who sneered at Teresa for sleeping with James as he blames her for being blind to what she was letting into her bed. Fuck off, Pote. And the worst part is he never apologizes. Not to Teresa, not to James. Not even slightly. Not even a sign of remorse to Teresa! For digging in his heels and insisting it must have been James and thereby throwing a major wrench in Jeresa's personal relationship.

To Teresa's credit, though, she at least apologizes, to James. I'll talk more in the 3x12 meta and gifset reblog tags about her feelings and why she can't just open all the way up to James at this point, but I feel like at the end of 3x11 she feels so heavy with what she's put him through that she honestly just believes him that he wants space. I can't imagine really that James wouldn't have forgiven her pretty fast--after all, he knows what her trauma is (at least a lot of it, if not all of it) and he knows she has trust issues, partly due to all the trauma and partly due to her relationship history (*cough Guero cough*). He must understand that getting almost killed because of a mole would be enough to severely unnerve anyone and force them to look at the people they actually do trust the most and see them differently. And he loves her so much I don't think he could possibly hold a grudge (in fact I suspect he already knows he's going to have to go with Devon at this point). But yeah... for the moment, at least, he needs space. He's hurt, and understandably so. And she is not only feeling remorse for having doubted him, but is obviously also grieving Kelly Anne (and assuming he just killed her on top of everything else). So there'll be more angst and pain next episode with all of her trying in various ways to get him to stay while still holding back a little.

Just gonna end this with a gif of that kiss, because that kiss is such a sweet, gentle, achingly tender moment if you strip away all the context. Please get back to this ASAP guys. Even though I know you won't 😭😭😭

Ok I thought I was done but I just want to say one more thing. James told her on the balcony at the end of the episode that she should've come to him first. I actually disagree with him here. I don't really understand how she was supposed to "talk to James first" if he was a candidate for being the mole… because if he WAS the mole, it would've made everything since his return to Malta a lie, and thus talking to him first would've been stupid. She was in no way trying to be duplicitous with him. She felt genuinely afraid. But at the same time there was the part of her that knew it couldn't be him, and this part of her also didn't want him to know that she suspected him, because she knew how badly it would hurt him. She was just all twisted up in knots. And their relationship is so new--and she told him she couldn't trust people--I mean how much clearer could she be? Did he deserve her trust? ABSOLUTELY. But is it understandable that she thought, yikes if he's the mole, we need to be super careful? Yes. I mean, James is a dangerous, dangerous person.

What do I think Teresa should have done? Honestly... I don't really know. I really don't. I have been thinking about it all week and I still don't. If he were the mole, then telling him she knew there was a mole and suspected him--the communication he was asking for--could have been extremely dangerous. The whole thing about a mole is that it destabilizes any kind of trust because a mole is by its sheer existence unpredictable, dangerous, untrustworthy. And James would've understood that. So I guess what he's upset about is that there was even any question at all in her mind that it might've been him. Yeah, that's super painful for a man who is deeply in love with her and has been showing her that in all the ways he can find ever since he found her in Malta. And given what we know of James and loyalty, I think they should have been way more certain than they were (they being Pote and Teresa) that he had nothing to do with it. But 100% certainty? Man. I just don't think that would've been smart, either, not for someone with so many potential enemies out there.

Okay that really wraps it up. I thought this was going to be short, but it is actually impossible for me to keep things short, so my sincere apologies.

#queen of the south #qots #qots s3 #3x11 #2021 rewatch #txt post #qots reaction post #qots meta #the other big thing in this episode is Camila going down #Loya confesses that he was playing her and tries to get her to become a witness for the DEA #literally the way trust plays out for them is opposite and parallel #Camila puts too much trust in both men who surround her this season and ends up getting played by both of them #(meanwhile she herself is manipulative and calculating and untrustworthy) #and Teresa doesn't put enough trust in James #which ends up hurting her in a different but ultimately equally damaging way #anyway Camila's story finally gets interesting to me again next episode #because it intersects again with Teresa's yayyy

[kaypeace21]

Stranger things & Door symbolism (narrative analysis)

We see doors have a lot of symbolism and different meanings but to a certain extent it’s about respecting/not respecting boundaries &privacy, and being open or closed to others emotionally.

In s2 Max picks the door of the av club (trying to easedrop on the boys)-and it goes wrong (and causes dart to escape). Similarly, in s1 Karen picks Nancy’s bedroom door lock (and Nancy does not open up to her emotionally despite Karen saying “you can talk to me”). BUT in s3, we see Karen contemplating picking Nancy’s door again-and right after she decides not to try and pick the lock and respect Nancy’s boundaries (Nancy finally opens up the door and herself emotionally to Karen).We even  see Jonathan in s1 pick Lonnie’s car door (which we know is not a healthy dynamic).

Nancy also tries telling Jonathan not to break into Lonnie’s car-similar to Jonathan trying to convince Nancy (in s3e3) not to break into mrs. Drsicol’s via opening the front door.

We also see because jonathan doesn’t respect Lonnie (can’t blame him). So,Jonathan walks in uninvited through Lonnie’s front door -to investigate-similar to what Nancy did to mrs. Driscoll in s3 . These prior examples are also similar to El  breaking into Heather’s house  by using her telekenesis to unlock the front door (for her and Max’s investigation) . Or doing the same thing to Becky in s2 (for her solo investigation ). Why we have a shot of just El, Nancy, and Jonathan peaking through the doorway.

El unlocking latches also mirrors how the demogorgan ALSO used telekenesis to unlock the front door latch of Will’s house .

In fact flayed Bruce attacking j*ncy in s3, mirrors Will first being attacked by the demogorgan in s1. Jonathan & Will both lock the doors- than Nancy & Will try calling for help- but the supernatural creature unlocks their latches and both Nancy & Will drop the phones because of this.

we also see through every season-given El’s upbringing- El doesn’t respect  boundaries with doors -since she never received it with Brenner (who would come into room whenever he pleased/closed the door and threw her in solitary) .in s2-3 she uses her powers to pick/UNLOCK doors -to open them . And in s1 she used her powers to LOCK a door- and forcibly CLOSE the door to trap the boys in the room  (akin to the closed door in solitary).

This scene directly contrasts an earlier scene of Mike respecting El wanting the door open -by having El later NOT respect the boys’ desire for the door to be open . Mike asks if she wants the door closed and she says “no” so he lets it be open. When Lucas tries to open the closed door- she closes it and says “no”. (she had other in universe reasons for doing this- but this scene is later also paralleled to Hopper in s3 locking Mike in the car against his will, when he tried leaving. Similar to el closing the door on Lucas in s1 when he tried leaving.

In s1 (with El’s ptsd and) with El not understand privacy- she wants her door open . But in s2 when wanting privacy she closes her bedroom door (as Hopper demands she open it, and she cries). in s3 she also closes her door (now wanting privacy) when kissing Mike/ being on the phone with Mike/ hanging with Max ( and Hopper again yells at her to open the closed door).  Max even criticizes Hopper by saying   “do you knock? JEEZE”And in s3 flayed Billy yells at El and co to “OPEN the g*ddamn door”. In s2/3 we also see Hopper yell for el/Murray to ‘OPEN the damn door’  (despite murray having a “keep door CLOSED”sign).

*flayed-Billy also smashes the glass on the door to try and unlock the door-similar to flayed Bruce at the hospital.

And In s2 we see Neil tell Billy to  “open the door” . In fact the first word uttered after the door is opened, is by Billy -who says “what’s wrong?”. The same thing occurs when Hopper in s3 says to “open the door” -the door opens and Mike says  “what’s wrong?” (as another parallel) .

The Byers also in opposition to this, respect doors/boundaries of Will’s: 

Will (similar to Muray’s sign) has a “no trespassing” sign on his front door in s1 (also akin to the one at Hawkins’s lab). And when Will rides by the Hawkins sign- what happens, he’s chased by the demogorgan. But Jonathan and joyce respect Will’s sign/boundaries- Jonathan knocking on Will’s DOOR in s2 before entering & Joyce ringing castle byer’s DOORbell (and getting verbal permission) before entering in s1.

However, Jonathan doesn’t respect Lonnie :

so walks in uninvited through the door ,break into Lonnie’s car, and opens Lonnie’s trunk (door) without permission. later jonathan gets angry the cops/ Hopper searched his trunk (without permission) . Sort of matching his later hypocrisy of being ok to break into Lonnie’s car but not mrs. driscoll’s house.

of course - this is because Lonnie doesn’t respect jonathan’s boundaries. again- the demogorgan is called “the deep father” in d&d. And a light-bulb is shown in Lonnie’s shed when it attacks Will. So we see Lonnie behind an open door (of Jonathan’s room) and a single lightbulb. A single red light bulb is shown -when Jonathan doesn’t respect others boundaries and develops photos. Later when the demogorgan is in Jonathan’s house- Jonathan hides in Will’s room and the ‘keep trespassing’ sign FALLS OFF the door - when the demogorgan comes near. And again we had a shot of Lonnie next to the ‘no trespassing sign’ too.

So how does this relate to romance?  Or the supernatural?

For romance

Well what does Nancy do in s3 (unlike Karen in s3)? Well she not once, not twice but 3 times- opens jonathan’s door (despite the sign saying “please,do not  enter” (when red light is on). which is similar to Will’s “no trespassing “ /murray’s “keep door closed” sign).This is despite jonathan telling her not to-over and over. We see the first time she enters and he tells her this- she says “sorry”, but after she rolls her eyes  (and than later she does it 2 more times-showing she’s not actually sorry). It shows a lack of respect for her partner and his photography (light destroys his photos). This is similar to Jonathan busting into Lonnie’s. Or El -not respecting doors in every season (and spying on her bf who in s3 was not happy about this).

Which is one of the reasons j*ncy & m*leven were (verbally) paralleled specifically in s3 .Both pairings have no trust in boundaries/privacy- Jonathan taking those pics in s1 vi*lated Nancy’s boundaries/privacy, Nancy in s3 ruins jonathan’s photos while disrespecting his boundaries,El spies on Mike in s2-3 and says she makes her own rules-and doesn’t care if it made Mike uncomfortable.

We even have in s3e3-nancy & El break into people’s houses via the front door (to show how similar they are). 

This also correlates to my other post- where I talked about the theme of spying on love interests being done by many characters too (Jonathan to Nancy in s1,s2 lucas spying on Max, max on lucas in s3, steve and rando-girl who rejected him in s3. El in s2-3 to Mike.And  on the nonromantic end -the mf /the us gov spying on our heroes, El in s1 being trained to be a spy, karen spying on Mike in s3 via phones, similar to how the government agents in s1 monitored phone calls,etc. The snowball even had  l*max/ m*leven (who that season spied on eachother ) dance to a song about a st*lking ex- while the spying mf watched them as well).

Also as another romantic contrast to doors in s3:

Mike throws El in his closet (gay ref) and closes the door (to his real emotions ). As Karen says to Mike “talk to me’ about Will  (similar to Karen saying to Nancy  “talk to me” in s1 ) .And she says to Mike “I never want you to HIDE anything from me.” (which he literally is doing). 

 Similar to Nancy ins1 who’s door was closed (to symbolize being emotionally closed off from her mom -it signifies he wouldn’t open up to Karen in s1 about Will (cause he’s too occupied CLOSING his CLOSET door for EL- and pretending to be straight). 

Than in s3e1 during m*leven kiss it pans to a the rainbow drawing (which says Mike) & a drawing of Will the wise as the lyrics “just a little more time will open closing doors”plays. After this, at Will’s house in s3e1 ( while Will claims he won’t fall in love) you hear the lyrics in the back ironically  play  “Love that was new to you-you open up the door.” Like - go back to episode 1 -it’s true. After Joyce says ‘ok;- the song gets much louder just for the lyric “you open up the door”.XD I’m not making this sh*t up (they purposely didn’t subtitle the segment panned to Will but it’s clear as day) ! The other song Mike kisses El to in ep 1 is ‘can’t fight this feeling’ (which is about a guy afraid to tell his friend of many years that he loves them-but who is afraid to do so and ruin their platonic relationship- which doesn’t fit m*leven who kissed in less than a week . the song lyric also has the phrase “if i have to ...come crashing through your door, baby I can’t fight this feeling anymore.” XD Than after “time” (3 months/last ep of s3) El kisses Mike- infront of WILL’S OPEN CLOSET door, in Will’s room, while El holds Will’s bear that comes between them. El (similar to Karen’s closet scene) even tries to get Mike to talk about his “feelings” which he avoids doing with El (/ Karen). As mike doesn’t open up to El emotionally he also doesn’t reciprocate the kiss- or say i love you back-and the same song (’the first i love you’) which played when, in s3 ,Robin rejected steve cause she’s gay- plays. And both stobin/mileven s3 confessions also heavily parallel . I mean coming out as gay used to be called “coming out of the closet”...

The supernatural: Doors & upsidedown- “ A doorway between worlds”

Murray ,in s3, (translating for Alexi) calls the gate a “doorway between worlds”. While Mr clarke also calls it a “doorway” and discusses Hugh everete’s “many worlds” theory. So later when NOT respecting Mr.clarke’s boundaries and interrupting his date - Dustin says about the supernatural/deprivation tank “why are you keeping this curiosity door LOCKED?” We also see on the st soundtrack -the song playing while alexi is explaining the upsidedown - is called “the door is opening”. And @ghostgirlinsatin​ mentioned this detail after I orginally posted this-when alexi runs away ‘neutron dance ‘ plays and the lyric is “I’ll just stay behind this LOCKED door.”

We see mr clarke stab a pencil into a plate and Alexi stab a straw into a box to illustrate this doorway. Along with Lonnie hammering a nail into a wall in an attempt to close a open door (and saying someone should be held accountable for what happened to Will). it transitions from Lonnie repeatedly hitting the nail with a hammer to Mike stabbing a plate with a pencil -like mr clarke -and explaining how Will got to the upsidedown. Because ironically- Lonnie is the cause of what happened to Will (and should be held accountable). gif visuals-here.

If you’ve read my  ‘crashcourse of evidence for Will creating the upsidedown/mf” or the longer version called the “did theory” you generally know where this is going.

Like Dustin said- the upsidedown is a “alternate dimension” a “dark echo of our world.”

Which I believe Will created based on suppressed memories. A few things appear to be triggers-bathtubs, clowns, and slamming doors. When Will first sees the upsidedown in s2- the arcade door slams open (making Will jump). And later when first seeing the mf (his front door opens by itself-similar to the demogorgan opening the door in s1). In s3 when Billy yells to open the door- Will senses the mf (and touches the back of the neck-which a season prior was associated with memories).

I think the door imagery (to some extent) represents Lonnie coming home and slamming/unlocking the front door. in s1 when Hopper knocks at Joyce’s door aggressively (she says ‘go away lonnie’). Demogorgan in d&d also means ‘deep father’ & Nancy says the demogorgan is like a “lion” (lonnie’s name means lion). And just all the other connections to the demogorgan and Lonnie I talked about in my ‘crashcourse post’ (baseball, hunting,lights,etc). And the fact Billy and el (who are heavily paralleled to Will) also have Dads yelling to “open the door” is  suspicious too.  I mean Neil calls his son William a “f*g”, and makes him play baseball -just like Lonnie did to Will. And Neil also yells for William (Billy) to open his door, before hurting him. So I could see  Lonnie doing that to Will in the past ...

We even have El see a red door- while in the void

Heck- in s2 , Dr owens said Will’s anniversary affect would make him remember tra*matic memories and OPEN his neurological flood GATES(  and these openings to the upsidedown are also called GATES and DOORS)!

#el hopper #jonathan byers #nancy wheeler #byler #will byers #mike wheeler #joyce byers #lucas sinclair #max mayfield #billly hargrove #jim hopper #dustin henderson #stranger things theory #stranger things #karen wheeler #neil hargrove #lonnie byers

[lilylilym]

Cinematic language to help you understand why Levihan is more canon than you think

First thing first, of course the plane was Hange. And the wood parallel is deeper than just hints of canon ship

If the birb is Eren then the plane is Hange. It’s called a ✨symbol✨ and a ✨parallel✨ , a narrative device and a visual cue means for readers to reflect on 

a) things that happened related to the actual object (when have we seen this before and last time we see it what happened)

b) what it could represent in terms of symbolic meaning (travel, migration, meaning mobility and freedom and civilization and means and that Levi has a good life for example)

c) how it is positioned in relationships with other object/symbol that are similar to it visually, to draw some similarities and differences in terms of narrative (plane is a machine birb, scientific birb, Levi sees plane while Mikasa hanging out w birb, what do this mean???? Thinkkkkkk)

Some folks will find value in learning comp lit, to know how to read narrative work, including cinema. AOT is visual but it is also deeply cinematic in the way Hajime Isayama draws the panel and the variety of shots he uses to depict the passive narration such as voice-over, time-lapse, flashbacks, time jump, etc. 

Here’s an example of how AOT is structured by paralllels, symbols, and narrative devices through editing/cinematic techniques to tell the story. This is my favorite scene when Isayama uses a combination of cutaway and montage to use a character’s dialogue beyond the immediate moment (real time) to depict a larger theme of the story:

This scene is Levi and Kenny talking to each other in real time. There are many ways to depict a dialogue. If it is about each other, then characters are usually depict in “continuity editing” where the whole scene is about them talking to each other, shots will be opposite shots of their face, over-the-shoulder, giving audiences a feel that you are there with them in the convo, listening to them talk. But this scene “cutaway” in that it breaks up the “linear time” by showing audiences other images not realistically been seen by any character, to broaden the scope of the scene. Now you know it’s not just about the dialogue. However, cutaway usually is a thing that realistically in that scene, like cut to the tree while Kenny is still speaking, then go back to them. 

In this “sequence,” what is shown is a montage of images that are not only “flashbacks” (memory of things the characters have seen/witnessed, since he couldn't have seen Kuchel) but compilation of new images that are “symbolic” to the lines Kenny is speaking. In other words, the author is drawing “parallels” from one instances to others, connecting separated people, scenes, stories, actions, decisions into one larger thing we call “theme”––Isayama’s making sure that audiences know exactly what to think by forcing separated images into one montage, and make sure you understand that this message needs to be understood beyond Kenny. So that’s the cinematic language readers should be aware that Isayama is using.

That’s why arguing events based on literal evidence is limited, because it is cannon itself that events, stories, people’s decisions and investments are meant to be interpreted and understood in juxtaposition.

Now let’s move on to juxtapositions and parallel in Levihan and Eremika:

I know people have use the wood parallel to talk about how Levihan is canon, but I think the wood is meant to show that Levihan are the adult version of Eremika, who also understand and rely on each other, but a lot more secured in their relationship and trust. 

So, get this: for Eremika, Eren had to ask who he is to Mikasa (I know, dumbo) before they get the alternative living in the wood. That’s cuz their young love is shy and also full of insecurities and they are unsure of how to understand their affection for one another. The insecurity is especially pronounced when Mikasa, after having been asked that (”who am I to you”), still get so hurt when Eren said he had been hating her since they were kids. That means we can read that she took the question as “what do you want from me why are you clingy” instead of “pls tell me you like me.” 

In another world, she is her fierce self who lives only for her and Eren (like she used to back then, ready to fight the whole army to keep Eren alive but now she’s a soldier for humanity) and suggested that they runaway to live in the wood. In this scenario, Mikasa’s suggestion was implied, we never saw her do it, only told in Eren’s retelling, and even so, in his words (“thats what you said, Mikasa”).

This whole scene is continuity editing with flashbacks, purely from the perspective of Mikasa. You as the reader assumes her point of view, because the images depict Eren speaking, and Eren’s words dictate most of the information. So you, as a reader, is being told to, passively that this is what happened, and that whatever decision of how they get here, has been made prior to you. In other words, while the dialogue happening about them being together is real time, the dialogue of how they decided to do so, is not. That is meant for interpretation. The author does not let you know how it happened in real time. This intended foreclosing is meant to evoke a sense of confusion, unsatisfaction (because you do not get to know how decisions are made and why), so it is safe to assume that the intended feeling is also just that--bittersweet. You know the couple get to be together, but they were not entirely at peace. This life will weight heavily on them until the day Eren dies. This scene is in chapter 138, but in story’s time, it’s meant to be continue before the timeskip. 

For Levihan, in chapter 126, the conversation between Levihan was playing out in real time itself, but the whole scene is an independent moment that preceded the real event (which was continued on from chapter 125, where Hange and Levi met with Pieck and Theo). 

In this scene, readers can see that the suggestion was direct, and we were in on the act as it happens. Hange thought Levi was unconscious, so they were thinking out loud. “Maybe we should just live here together, right, Levi?” We see Hange contemplating about it, said it out loud, and sad that it might just be a wild thought. 

Time cut. Now they’re doing something else, before the path appears, and they turned around to wake Levi up. Levi woke up at that same moment, immediately asking about what happened before he was unconscious, not letting Hange know that he heard the whole thing. He took time to catch up with what happened, gathering information and providing information. This means he is contemplating about Hange’s proposal.

“I let him get away again.” Hange responded to this sentence with “I’m sure you want revenge, but for now...” Levi moved on, seamlessly, without a beat, “If we keep running and hiding, what will that get us?” At first it seems like a continuation of the convo--as in Levi doesn’t want to keep hiding and want to go back to battle, but Hange understood immediately that he was referring to their talk: “So you heard me talking to myself.” 

Here, Hange weren’t like “omg im sorry I didn’t know u were up i would have never,” because that would suggest that the relationship between them is unconfirmed and that Hange has yet to know what Levi thinks of them (as seen in Eremika’s nature of their relationship). But they were just like, ok, so you heard. Then Levi saw that Hange was making a thing to carry him, and concluded, “I know you. You’re not able to stay out of the action.” Hange admitted, “Yeah, that’s right, I can’t.” 

If you look at the scene itself, you will see a lot of opposite shots (POV of the two characters who are talking to each other), many of them are close-up (right in their face). It is a short, but continuous, linear conversation where Hange and Levi got to talk about the possibility, discussed it together, before Levi pointed out that Hange could never just sit this one out, and Hange agreed. This scene is also meant for interpretation, because even though they talked about the possibility, they didn’t go “so what do you think, I think we should” but it was Hange’s wild thought that they fully intended not to go through, and Levi’s understanding that he was not meant to truly respond, because he saw that Hange already had a plan to keep it moving. (The next scene is Levi negotiating with Theo and Pieck, so it’s safe to assume that they spent the rest of their conversation discussing strategies.)

Levihan’s scene is short, but it was meant to read in juxtaposition with Eremika’s more elaborate life in the wood in 138 -- communicating the idea that if they had run away together, they would also suffer intensely survivor’s guilt. Which, as soldiers and commanders, they simply cannot choose. So, in a way, this is to depict Levi’s theme, “no regret,” even as they never had a future to be together at peace. The fact that they can have this extremely heavy conversation means that there were peaceful moments between them that they experienced, that would allow this scene to read like a final good bye.

So, as I have rambled more than I needed to, I’mma stop here. My point was pretty simple and meant to invite folks to read AOT very generously in terms of its couple/romantic/partnership, in that just because things are not fleshed out doesn’t mean it’s not real and that readers are supposed to read between the line, thematically, across storylines to get the full picture, but sternly in the way that you need to understand narrative devices and visual cues the ways they’re meant to be read. To go back to the plane controversy (apparently some people insist that planes are planes), of course planes are planes, that’s what they first and foremost need to be. No object would be included for the symbolic meaning only - it always need to be itself first and foremost, to create a normative sense of reality before it could go imaginative and interpretive.  

#snk #aot #levihan #eremika #levi ackerman #hange zöe #kenny ackerman

[danidoesathing]

you make a great point on how yaldy's relationship / the fact akira killed someone he knew for months is never elaborated on. man the amount of malice that must've been in that bullet... ough. i really dont think he'd have an easy time trusting any sort of god or high authority figure after that. (not that it was in the first place.) this might also make his awakening to satanael kind of.... complicated, but given that they're his other self i think he'd be open to trying to trust them. (1/2)

(2/2) i agree so hard with your last point. i absolutely see satanael as being protective of akira for a multitude of reasons, like the 'pure being' one you mentioned. i think he'd probably see something of himself in akira? either empathizing with how he's been cast out and then had all this bullshit happen, or feeling alike in rebellious spirit. maybe a connection through the fact that they're both good "people" but also still willing to play dirty and be selfish. prolly all of the above ahaha

YEAH another things that wasn't super elaborated on is Yaldabaoth's and Akira's relationship. They had a fucking confidant and it's treated like it's nothing in the end. Akira had bonded with him through the confidant, even if Yaldy was lying, which meant that Yaldabaoth must have had SOME positive feelings for Akira. I've always imagined it similar to that of Satanael (woohoo parallels) in that Yaldy believes that humanity is worthless and greedy and selfish, and that in order to save them he has to rule over them. But then theres Akira, the exact opposite of what he believed humanity to be, and spent months guiding him (in his eyes, as it was most sabotage and cryptic hypocrisy on Akira's end). He even offers Akira a place in his new world, which like....holy shit why does no one ever talk about the fact that Yaldabaoth offered Akira his ideal world (together with his friends helping people). That indicates that Yaldy has some bit of care for Akira. I've always thought that Yaldabaoth does actually care about Akira, in a fucked up, controlling "oh you poor misguided soul I, your merciful and wonderful god, will protect you" type of way, but he does have some care for him. Yaldabaoth might even seen Akira turning down his offer as a betrayal against him (which. isn't fair in the least bit but by know we all know Yaldy is anything but fair). And on Akira's side, it's just another authority figure that was supposed to protect him use and throw him away when he rebels. Anger is a huge driving factor in his actions and awakening and another betrayal by those in power amplified that to a biblical scale, which was likely another aspect that drew Satanael to him. I really wish the Fool confidant was more in depth and not the same shit looped over and over. Imagine if we actually got to build a bond with Yaldabaoth (I've the idea of Yaldy using random people to interact with Akira mixed with Igor's stuff, which at first could be seen as the Fool being Tokyo at large.) imagine being able to build a bond with the villain of the story, creating a complex dynamic of an unhealthy bond and make the ending scene having some really strong emotional weight

I've got more for Satanael because he lives in my head rent free. a lot of this is also based on how I think ultimates work. I personally think that God personas are still their godly selves, but (to an extent) share a soul with their masters. The whole contract thing makes me think of legitimately making a contract with a higher being. (Maybe it's a fusion type thing where the God's fuse with your persona? I'm still not entirely sure). So I think in a metaphorical and literal way, Satanael does see himself in Akira. They both hold this parallel of being cast out, rebelling against God and destroying Eden (both the world Yaldy wanted and the one Maruki wanted, but with Maruki its more of a literal parallel). Akira is the Trickster of rebellion, and has the kindness and perceived purity that Satanael lacks. He sees how much Akira has gone through and wants to preserve those qualities because he sees the world (and humanity as a whole) as an awful corrupt thing that would only hurt him more. He's an example of what little good there is in the world and Satanael is more than ready to fight it for him. difference between him and Yaldy's idea of protection is that Satanael actually respects Akira's free will and desire not to burn the world down.

I've also got this concept in my head that Satanael and Akira have this "You can't trust anyone but yourself" idea. Like Akira has some MAJOR trust issues in general with both authority and people around them, even people he deeply cares about and feels a connection to (see: Goro and Maruki). He doesn't really trust his friends with his problems (especially after the interrogation room, that whole post scene is just YIKES but even without that there's the whole "I need to be a strong unshakable leader they think I am" and the WHOLE song of beneath the mask) and it's....not really healthy but once Satanael actually came to Akira they both sort of clung to each other because now Satanael has someone who understands and cares about him and Akira can actually share his issues and fears with someone without the fear of it being used against him or being perceived as weak or less than. They believe that they can only really rely on themselves, as they as are each other, Satanael and Akira rely on each other in a way he won't with with anyone else.

#dani speaks #MANY THOUGHTS HEAD FULL #im sorry for talking your ear off about this but you triggered off the insane thoughts in my head #im a LIVING right now I love it when people ask me/comment on my thoughts #thank you anon #satanael has so many cool aspects that could be expanded on and im miffed that its not #but ill do it myself god dammit #can you tell I follow muzzleroars? yeah #their aus are just too good and they're one of the few people that actually expand on Yaldy and yaldy's relationship with akira #its really good and has given me brain rot #persona 5 #persona #ask #asks #akira kurusu #yaldabaoth #satanael #p5 satanael

[seadem-on]

“Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God. Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied”.

- the Gospel of Luke, 6:20-21

Your probably too long to read, incomplete and obscure introduction to the themes of loneliness and forgiveness in the Good, the Bad and the Ugly (including religious references).

Image there just for cuteness. Let’s go!

1) Loneliness

Tuco is a tragically lonely character. The layers on which this loneliness is played out are multiple. Not only he is cast away from his family - having deserted it - and morally from religion - as his priest brother points out he has done nothing “outside evil” - and from the law-ruled society - being Tuco a literal outlaw, with a long rap sheet to testify for it - but also he is spiritually outside of God’s grace - “while I wait for the Lord to remember me” he says to his brother Pablo.

He does seek out company - he tries to reintroduce himself in his family at the monastery, when he meets his brother again after 9 years. The scene with his brother draws a parallel between Tuco and the “Prodigal son” of Jesus’ parable, who left his family for a life of sin. His angered brother Pablo cannot understand the reason why he came to visit and underlines the evil he has done. The scene does not only show the derangedness of traditional familial relations; it also expresses a strong anticlerical statement showing how far the Church is from putting into practice the original spirit of brotherly love and solidarity.

He has no one on his side. No God - when Tuco says that God is on his side something happens that contradicts his statement. No brother - being rejected by Pablo. No friend - being betrayed by Blondie at the beginning of their partnership.

The symbol of loneliness and lack of human connection is the desert. The torture of Blondie at the hands of Tuco takes place in the desert. The film itself begins with a long shot of a desert landscape which is immediately filled by a gigantic close-up on the face of a killer. In this desert we are immediately welcomed by a threatening figure: it is really the only kind of humanity that can be found there - ruthless and keen to murder.

Tuco is deeply violent too. He is a murderer, a torturer, a thief, a criminal. He is the lowest a man can get. And he is fully aware of his own nature. The image of the dog wandering at the beginning of the film in the ghost town embodies the way Tuco moves in the world - belonging to none, hungry, constantly threatened, constantly looking for company and food. He is in fact chased by the afore mentioned killer but manages to escape.

Though it is never stated outright, Tuco’s real quest is to find a friend. But in the kind of world painted by Leone “friend” is someone who can potentially turn on you. A danger. Society (food sharing, family) is embued with violence and threats. One has to put up a facade to hide their weakness and survive.

But this desire is persistent in Tuco. Through his lies he states it to Blondie: he needs to know that “even for a tramp like him there is always a bowl of soup”. He needs to know that there is someone out there that can fulfill this hunger for company. Someone who does not point out his sins like his brother does. Someone who loves him for who he is - a tramp, a criminal, a bastard, a sinner.

2) Presence

“Were you gonna die alone?”

Is there anything more absurd than loving your enemy? After all that Tuco has done to him, Blondie - the archetypal rebel - makes a disruptive gesture. He kindly offers Tuco the cigar passing it from his mouth thus symbolically offering himself.

The cigar is a part of Blondie, as we cannot imagine his character without it. Furthermore he is literally taking it from his mouth, as if sharing with Tuco a part of himself.

The parallel with the wafer of the eucharist is evident as the gesture - and its orality - symbolically represents union and community. From this moment on Blondie and Tuco form a partnership which is hard to break - that draws them back together when they are apart - a kind of connection that does not entail money. Furthermore, the wafer in the eucharist is the body of Christ - offered “to wash away humanity’s sins”. This meaning is carried out to the end of the film. “He who eats the body of Christ does not die”.

Blondie reaffirms his offering himself multiple times. When he reunites with Tuco, Blondie tells him to kill Angel Eyes and his henchmen, and then joins him in the fight, asking him mockingly “were you gonna die alone?”. He makes it clear he is on Tuco’s side, and actively supports him.

Finally during the last showdown Blondie offers him protection - right when Tuco is at his weakest. Blondie’s gaze and nod in his direction calm and steady Tuco.

This goes to close Tuco’s quest to find a friend; a competitor, a rival, and enemy who also is on his side when needed.

Blondie’s actions are aimed at mending the relationship with Tuco with forgiveness and love - making Blondie the bearer of a “love thy enemy” message. And this is clearer if we look at the parallels between Blondie and Christ: he is tortured, (almost) dies and comes back to life, loves the one who hurt him, and protects him (see citation at the beginning of the post).

Blondie is even seen occupying the same position as a statue of Christ - see image below.

By this I do not mean he is painted as a superior being - actually it is the opposite. I mean more simply that as a character he carries a worldview embued with forgiveness, kindness, and love. He still is a criminal - but he is capable to feel tenderness despite his violent actions. Both he and Tuco show this “duplicity”, or ambiguousness. Moreover, in the film he and Tuco switch roles at different times - sometimes Blondie embodies Christ, as the “innocent” victim, whereas at the end Tuco takes on the position of Christ (and of course to they respectively embody Judas too, betraying each other for gold). That goes to show how thin the line is between victim and perpetrator, how there is both good and bad in our our nature.

Looking at the symbolicism again, Angel Eyes (whose name is originally Sentenza) embodies judgement, which opposes forgiveness. Tuco can finally escape judgement and death thanks to the presence and forgiveness of Blondie.

Also ultimately it is not Blondie who acts alone and saves Tuco. He lets Tuco take his decision. He lets Tuco make the choice to shoot first - choice which is possible since Tuco trusts that Blondie has his back. Tuco is freeing himself from the violence ridden world choosing partnership, trusting another person.

The most absurd thing of it all is that Blondie - the unbound rebel, the embodiment of individualistic self interest, and most of all the victim of Tuco’s torture - actively chooses to be by his side. This choice is disruptive in many ways. First, it is an act of tenderness in a world ruled by violence. Secondly, their partnership allows Tuco to find a haven out of the systems of religion, law and society that have excluded him. And ultimately it saves Tuco from death as a form of punishment for his crimes (forgiveness vs. Judgement).

#the good the bad and the ugly #gbu meta #clint eastwood #eli wallach #sergio leone #spaghetti western #the dollars trilogy #tuco ramirez #il buono il brutto il cattivo

[interact-if]

Day 10, 2/2 of the A/PI Heritage Month featured authors interview! For our final entry, we have the amazing Shai!

Shai, author of Hollowed Minds 

A/PI Heritage Month Feature Author

“You will play as a disgraced detective, entangled in webs of conspiracies and betrayal as your character engages in a suspicious probation - with a whole lot of enigmatic hallucinations and explosions to deal with. It will be up to you to shape your detective’s (or Ripper’s, if you prefer to call them that) perception and motivations. After all, Gaile City is a place full of secrets - some of them belonging to your own character’s family - and you’ll have the freedom how to act accordingly.”

Author's Kofi

(INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT UNDER THE CUT!)

To put it simply, Hollowed Minds is a long quest on morality and relationships. You'll start as a disgraced detective, once a favored hero of the city until this one unfortunate mistake, and now you're forced into a suspicious probation that you shouldn't even be in. There would be a lot of challenges and suffering along the way, and you can either help your character maintain their heroic ideals or succumb to the darkness that the future brings.

Q1: First of all, introduce us to your project! What is it about?

There are a lot of things to uncover in the story, but the main issues in the first book would be the mysterious hallucinations that people are suffering from and the explosions that would shake the fundamentals of the society. There would be several approaches to choose from as you go forward, some of which may be quite outside the law, and you could opt to use a certain ‘talent’—one with accompanying repercussions—to learn more secrets. You would also have the choice to cultivate your relationships with the people you trust the most and have your interactions with them matter in the long run.

As it is, you'd have a large target on your back, owing to a sinister group with a very sinister plan—something that might be worse than death.

Q2: If it’s not too spoilery, what are you most excited about your project?

First of all, the reputation system. You can manipulate how the general public would see you, either as the hero they once saw you as, or a corrupted personality that everyone would loathe. Best thing about it? You can hide your real intentions. This would have a lot of interesting consequences, especially if your character's actions tend to be the opposite of what they're perceived as.

Second, the most awaited reunion. People who have read the available demo would know what this refers to, and well, it's about to happen soon, so I'm very excited about the idea of writing the whole scene!

Then there's this one big chapter that I know would be torturous to write and code. Basically, you'll be choosing how to 'infiltrate' this certain location, the person whom you'd be with most of the time, a decision between accomplishing what you came there for or sacrificing it for something else, how you'd get out, and where you'd go to after the whole thing. It will be a wild ride of twists and emotions, and it's not even the endgame. A lot may change with this chapter alone, and it's one of those things I think about a lot before going to sleep.

Lastly, the customization of the main character. The motivations, blame mechanic, alcoholic/non-alcoholic option, and relationships (romantic or not). Those little details would change a lot of content in the narrative and maybe in the plot itself. Whether you want to build a character who's kind to a fault or an anti-hero who wouldn't hesitate to make questionable decisions, the journey would be entirely yours.

Q3: What inspired the current project you’re working on?

It was based from a short story of mine that won a small competition back in 2018. They share similar themes, but the short story was a lot darker than I could ever put in a game that I plan to get published.

I initially thought of starting my IF writing attempts with the supernatural genre—it does seem to be a successful area—but that short story was probably the first piece of mine that I've come to appreciate, and I wanted to at least honor that. The writing style that I adopted, the evocative tone I learned to use, and the plot pieces that I've managed to be good at crafting—they all started with that story.

Looking back, there aren't much similarities anymore between the two, maybe aside from the appearance of certain characters, but the themes are still the same.

It will definitely be a huge challenge to implement what I have on mind, but I do hope people would love what's to come.

Q4: Do you pull from your own identity for inspiration? How has that been reflected in your work?

I grew up in a troublesome neighborhood, along with people who continue to fight against the struggles. That's both good and bad, I suppose. Philippines has a lot of corruption deep in its roots, I won't deny that, but there are also people working hard for the changes they want. That's one of the biggest influences I've got in this story.

As we delve into the plot, the readers would discover more questionable decisions that some characters may have made or would make. It's parallel to how I witnessed people having differing reactions to injustice and the way they make changes in their lives as a response. Adding to that, I personally know the feeling of grief, and I’ve seen how the people around me deal with it themselves.

There are also moral choices to be had in the game, and when I speak of that, it's not going to be just around choosing between saving/killing people. It's about the main character's intentions and emotions, and how the revelations might slowly change their views. It would be a story that will steadily define your character’s perceptions amid the threats.

Q5: What’s been your experience so far? With writing, with the if community...

It's been great. I appreciate the people who have reached out in various ways to share their love for my work and to give meaningful feedback that are continuously helping me shape the story in a better way. And honestly, I'm so overwhelmed with excitement for all the support I'm getting. I didn't even expect a lot of people to like the story this early. That's why I'm so thankful!

There's also a great IF author whom I've been occasionally getting advice from, and they've been a huge reason as to why I even managed to make the first steps. Interacting with other writers is something that I never really expected myself to do, but I’m quite glad I did it.

Q6: Do you have any future projects in the works?

There are three more interactive fiction stories I've already thought of, though I won't be actively working on them until I finish the Hollowed Minds series, which would take a long while. Their temporary titles are respectively "Corrupted Legacies" (fantasy), "The Remnant's Keeper" (supernatural horror), and "A Hero's Touch" (superhero story with a twist).

Aside from that, I'm also looking forward to finishing my fantasy novel, one that I've been delaying for years, literally, as soon as I finish the first book of Hollowed Minds.

Q7: Finally, what piece of advice would you give to fellow authors?

Write what you want to write. I know that you're all probably tired of hearing this, but it is still very important. During the planning stages, you'd most likely be excited to show the readers what you've got in store. You'd be proud of it, and you'd believe that it's one of the most brilliant ideas out there. Then a few days after you finish planning, you'll realize it may not attract as much readers as you may have expected initially. Then you'll get tempted to change your visions for the story and adopt the plot lines that the famous works have.

Do not abandon your own vision.

It's your work. It's your masterpiece. Listen to feedback, sure, and let them guide you into becoming a better writer, but do not let go of the things that made your work your own. Some way or another, there will be people who would love your story, and they'd deeply appreciate that you made it the way it is.

So don't hesitate. Is it weird? Is it unconventional? Does it belong to a genre that's not as popular as the others? It doesn't matter. Write it, polish it, and show it to the world.

People will love it as long as you do.

#if: events #Happy Asian and Pacific Islander month!! #Asian/pacific islander month 2021 #a/pi month #a/pi month 2021 #aapiheritagemonth #aapi month #interactive fiction #authors of color

[ahwait-no-yes]

Let’s talk about if Saihara hated Ouma

So lately I’ve actually seen a bit more comments on how Saihara doesn’t actually like Ouma and people have gone as far as saying he hates him and idk why people genuinely believe it so here I am about to refute that (I’ve been waiting ages to make this post just so you know so this came out as a horribly unstructured ramble more than anything oops)

some notes beforehand:

I have an obvious bias as I do ship saiouma. although i’ll try to be neutral on what I say here, I can’t hide my bias. I have tried to include what people that hate this ship believe to counter them though, also if you ship other things that’s totally fine?? don’t think of any of this as an attack at your ship and I’m not saying Saihara loved Ouma, I’m just tired of people saying Saihara hated him.

You’re allowed to respectfully disagree as long as you don’t berate me or say I don’t know the game when the majority of the screenshots in this are from my own gameplay, lmao. 

and massive whole-game spoilers! Don’t read this if you’ve not finished DRV3!

Glad to know you made it under the cut! now I can begin with where I think people got this idea that Saihara hates him from- the infamous “You’re alone Kokichi and you always will be” line.

I admit this was very cold and still breaks my fragile saiou heart, but to base Saihara’s entire perspective of Ouma on this one line he said while he wasn’t thinking straight is just.. no.. It’s unrealistic. we’ve seen how Saihara is able to adapt his views and grow (I’ll come back to this later), he’s not stubborn in this regard like Momota or even Ouma is, so even if he did mean it 100% (which I doubt because when *anybody* is angry they will say or do things they may regret had they been calmer), it’s not like his view on Ouma from chapter 4 was his final view on him. And that’s what people fail to realise. 

So, how does Saihara view Ouma then?

well, I’d say he’s been interested in Ouma as a detective from the moment he met him with his curiosity piqued at Ouma’s claims of leading a secret organisation.

and he remains curious about Ouma throughout, always questioning why Ouma says certain things, what Ouma is lying for, he just wants to figure him out- and this doesn’t just apply to free time events either

I think you get my point there, now, I think if I didn’t ship saiou and read this, I’d argue these are all pre-chapter 5 and before the breaking line so he may have been curious before but not after- that then brings me to my next point

Saihara was confident- dare I say believed- in Ouma, especially after Chapter 5.

how bold of me to say ikr, but this ties in to Saihara’s ability to adapt his views. He’s sort of like a mixture of both Kaito and Ouma honestly, because naturally as a detective he has to be suspicious and think logically as Ouma does, while at the same time Kaito taught him to believe in his friends which has also helped him to advance in trials. I think he might have extended this belief to Ouma, because he trusts that Ouma is doing what he does for a reason.

In fact, I’d argue he’s the only one of the remaining group who wouldn’t readily accept pinning Ouma down as a villain. If anything, it’s the opposite- Saihara fought to clear Ouma’s name, and never stopped trying to understand whether or not his intentions were true or false

i’ll just drop this screenshot here (that i named THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY.png in case you were wondering)

this is what I mean when I say he wouldn’t accept it as fast as the others and would second-guess it, bear in mind this is the moment Ouma “admitted” to being the mastermind. and it’s not like this doubt was sudden or anything, cause I can recall this moment (that I actually didn’t catch on to on my first playthrough)

which gives me the idea that hadn’t Ouma purposefully messed with everyone and built up his bad reputation, it would’ve been so much easier for Saihara to disprove him being the mastermind at the point he said it. 

Anyway, going back to my point- excluding Kaito (cause Ouma directly told him), Saihara is the first to bring up Ouma’s innocence, and this is what I mean when I say Saihara believed in Ouma

note that I say believed in. believing Ouma and believing in Ouma are different, it’s like how loving someone and being in love with someone are two different things, so don’t argue that by saying “he didn’t trust him” because ik that and that’s not what I’m trying to say.

but he did believe that Ouma had his reasons, and he tried to discover and understand them. I mean, take this for example

he’s already on board lool look at him go, but no really look at the confidence

he’s both confident in himself and in Ouma not lying here, then goes back to being curious about his intentions

oh and let’s not forget who it was that searched Ouma’s lab to find clues to prove he is a remnant of despair. Why do you need to search for evidence for something you (and the others even more) think is irrefutably true? the answer is obvious- he was doubtful of it from the start, and needed evidence to convince himself it was true, but then as he found nothing to prove it (and even evidence against it), he had to convince the others of it too- and prove Ouma’s innocence

(the last screenshot was from Hikkie’s playthrough on Youtube) 

But as you can see, he’s clearing Ouma’s name as the leader of the Remnants of Despair. 

Now, I bet someone would argue that this only proves Saihara was determined to find the truth in general, because he’s mister detective, so I’ll raise you the fact that Saihara didn’t need to try figuring why Ouma does the things he does- he could leave it at just knowing the truth and if he really didn’t like Ouma like people say then there’s not much merit to it. 

“So what if I know this now? I didn’t care about him, it’s pointless” he could’ve thought something like that, but no

(I also think the “you’re lying again kokichi, there’s a method to your madness” moment fits here too)

Not only this, but there’s also how Saihara learnt from him.

honestly im still kinda mindblown from this ever since I first realised it, but when you think about it, Ouma hinted to Saihara in his FTEs how to win the game.

(those 3 screenshots are from justonegamr’s kokichi’s FTE video; random fun fact this was the playthrough that i watched while first getting into drv3)

But if you think about it, Ouma tried this again in his own trial in his attempt at ending the killing game and then Saihara also used this to actually end it

Not only that (which personally i think is pretty powerful in itself), but Saihara also tries to take Ouma seriously and picks up hints he leaves and uses them later

as well as

et

(and generally just)

generally, Ouma will hint and then Saihara will pick it up. it’s been like that for the whole game- why should Saihara give any extra thought to what Ouma hints if he dislikes him?? really, he could’ve just ignored him the same way he did at the end of chapter 4- but again, he didn’t “”hate”” Ouma enough to keep ignoring him, he considered him a friend in the end anyway.

and the end is what I’ll talk about now, too.

first- can we just acknowledge this?

he doesn’t ignore Ouma at all here. even though he didn’t trust him, he was sad to have lost him. 

Not to mention the way he thinks about lying at the end of Chapter 6. (like, please this is just-  *chefs kiss*)

IMAGINE Ouma was alive to hear him say that omg but Saihara could (and probably would) extend what he says here to Ouma himself- y’know, the ‘embodiment of lies’

by thinking about lies in a different angle instead of at face value like this, he gets a more neutral view on them rather than just thinking “they’re bad!!”, why wouldn’t he be able to do the same for Ouma? especially now that he knows Ouma was innocent and actually hated the game as much as they all did. I mean hey, even after chapter 5′s trial he sort of already thinks about lies differently

and throughout this post, I’ve tried to avoid talking about his free time events or his salmon mode ending because people always say “well they’re not canon” and to that I say not canon to the plot, yes, but still canon to the characters. so yeah, I don’t disregard any of them.

from this point onwards these all technically happen before chapter 5, so it’s not entirely relevant to my point that saihara still liked ouma even after the end of chapter 4, but it’s still something that shows he liked him beforehand at least. I mainly just wanna ramble though haha

one thing I’ve always thought was interesting was how Saihara easily lashed out at Kaito in his own free time event

and Kaito is undeniably Saihara’s best friend who he holds in high regard. If Saihara having backbone means he doesn’t like someone then damn bye bye momota have a nice trip in space

in terms of ouma and saihara though 

how about the fact that Saihara willingly sat there and played rock paper scissors (janken pon!) with Ouma 100 times?? bruh I got bored playing that with my brother after 8 rounds yesterday how would Saihara manage 100?? would you really have the patience for that when you don’t even like the person you’re playing with?

how about his third free time event too?

(from justonegamr’s kokichi fte video)

Saihara wanted to spend some time with Ouma, that’s- its literally written there I don’t know what you want from me the guy wanted a nice time with someone he supposedly doesnt like

what I love about this is how “reaching out” could be taken both literally and figuratively. Wanting to understand someone and trying to find a way to but them being too unwilling to trust anyone.. damn 😔👊 also shuuichi either wanted to handshake or hold hands, what else do you do when you reach for someone’s hand come on

oh yes and how about that he’s content with the refusal because it allowed him to figure out a small thing about Ouma? understanding that Ouma has a different way of being reached out to? mhm please think about that for a bit

that parallel in the salmon ending too...

he considered how it’ll be like with him after they get out and how he’ll learn about him, then ultimately decided when ouma reached out to him that he does want this, and even comments on the warmth of his hand... afhskfdlj

his blush when ouma mentions how his lies didn’t bore saihara was also a very cute moment

ooh and what about the love hotel???

there’s that one line “I know i’m meant to be Kokichi’s ideal in this fantasy but when he tells me he loves me I feel like he means the opposite” or something like that- i’d argue it’s because he’s cautious of Ouma for one but also am I getting something wrong here or is he talking about how he, Shuuichi, thinks Ouma doesn’t like him?  because I see people argue this is proof saihara doesn’t like ouma but all he’s really doing is just doubting ouma loves him

well in any case

WHY would he want him to stay in a love hotel of all places if he disliked him?! I know I’m just a broken record at this point but I can’t think of anything logical for it. they didnt even need to include that line in the scene at all but they did like they could’ve easily said something to do with realising where he was instead but nah. even after the event’s over, he says to himself

doesn’t he sound disappointed by it? and the fact that he even questions if it was a dream- okay  

ooh, something i’ve realised while writing this as well: it kind of seems like Saihara might not want to like him but does anyway; he quickly ‘smothered the thought’ of staying with Kokichi, didn’t want to admit that Ouma’s lies never bored him, and I also thought about how in one of Kaito’s free time events he says to himself “I shouldn’t be talking about another boy like that”- well, maybe it’s similar for how he thinks of ouma? it’s not like Saihara didn’t care for the others’ opinion on him (probably the opposite ngl if you mess up in class trials he says something along the lines of“Ah I screwed up! They probably think I’m a fraud”) and considering nobody else liked ouma (except for maybe gonta) I wouldn’t be surprised if he felt shame for liking him, thus repressing that feeling (especially around the others, there’s that part in trial 4 where he’s trying to convince kaito he isn’t siding with ouma cause he knows by doing that could damage his friendship with his bro)

I mean this is something I only thought of just now, but it could be plausible (i hope?)

One last thing- I find it incredibly funny how in chapter 2 when ouma is literally on top of saihara he doesn’t freak out or scream and everyone else in the room is also completely chill with it and unquestioning. no really they’re just standing there.. and how long was ouma even in that position for??

Now, I think that’s all. So to finish off, I’ll just say

People get the idea that saiouma is bad because some don’t realise Saihara can still like a person without idolising or putting them on a pedestal. Idk if this is gonna sound controversial or not, but I honestly do think he did exactly that to Kaito and Kaede- which doesn’t make what they have with him toxic or bad at all, I just think his view on Ouma is a lot more realistic and less clouded. Heck, if Saihara canonically liked Ouma as much as he does with the other two I don’t know if I’d ship saiouma as hard as I do (it is fun to imagine though).

If you actually read through this then.. wow? I’m surprised you got through this unstructured mess? I hope you can agree with me for some of my points at least but I’m not here to convince you or anything, this has just been on my mind for weeks now I needed to get it out somehow.

I said it at the start and i’ll say it again now too- i didn’t intend on attacking or comparing saiou to any other ships so I do apologise if I seem like it, i’m just terrible with my wording (lmk if something genuinely offended you, i’ll probably change it) but you’re free to ship whatever you like cause at the end of the day it’s just a bit of fun. that being said, I don’t want to actually argue on this so please don’t haha, i’ve contemplated just deleting this but I’ve put a lot of effort into this post even though i cant analyse for 💩

I hope you can enjoy the rest of your day!

have the kokichi gaygun as a farewell present

#saiouma #oumasai #saihara shuuichi #saihara shuichi #ouma kokichi #shuuichi saihara #shuichi saihara #kokichi ouma #saihara #shuuichi #shuichi #ouma #kokichi #saiou #ousai #all you saious have some hope okay #or reject it 😎 #danganronpa v3 #ndrv3 #drv3 spoilers #v3 spoilers #idk what to tag im really nervous hah #ahwait-no-yes proper rambles #long post #its been 24 mins since i finished this post #why am i so nervous omg #oh well whatever #there's some screenshots i wanted to include #but couldnt really fit them anywhere #also i cant analyse oops