#mr. quagmire

[afterthegreatunknown]

nice pre-canon heacanon thing

Mr. Quagmire, walking down the stairs: Hm, given it’s a Sunday and I don’t have work to worry about, I think I’ll attempt to make French toast with jam. The kids were talking about it to themselves last week. It would be nice to surprise them with it. Do we have enough eggs though? Is that why Joanie wasn’t in bed when I woke up?

*Mr. Quagmire turns, and walks down the hallway that leads to the kitchen. He sees the door is close, with Mrs. Quagmire standing by it...for some reason.*

Mr. Quagmire: Hello there, Joanie. Is there something fascinating with the door that I don’t know about?

Mrs. Quagmire, laughing: The only thing that can be fascinating about a door is what’s behind it, Q.

*Mrs. Quagmire opens the door. Mr. Quagmire sees Duncan, Isadora, and Quigley standing near the table, with smiles on their faces. The table has a tall glass of orange juice, and a plate of French toast with jam.*

Duncan, singing: ~You are our dad!~

Isadora, joining in: ~You’re our dad!~

Quigley, shimmying: ~Boogie Woogie Woogie~

#asoue #a series of unfortunate events #mr. quagmire #mrs. quagmire #quagmire triplets #duncan quagmire #isadora quagmire #quigley quagmire #incorrect quotes #source: vine #(i thought of the vine and this came to me in an instant) #we all queue in a yellow submarine

[aseriesofunfortunatetexts]

incorrect ASOUE

#quigley quagmire #mr. poe #a series of unfortunate events #asoue #asoue edit #incorrect quotes #source: derry girls

[quigleyquaqmire]

Violet and Mrs. Quagmire had quite a few parallels, and I can't help but imagine Quigley picking up on those later. Can you just imagine him looking over at her when they're older like, "my mother would have loved you."

#I make myself sad sometimes #violet baudelaire #quigley quagmire #mrs quagmire #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #quiglet #my post

[ven10]

Quigley’s map and case are drawn on Mrs .Bass’ blackboard (can be seen at 20:02 of S2E2) , there is also the sugar-bowl drawn as well as a diving helmet, the lighthouse from TWW, a spyglass and a strange (animal) skeleton.

If many of the pictures are relevant to past, present and future episodes (e.g, the helmet referencing TGG which comes after TAA) then does that mean that the drawings that don’t seem to be clear references relate to events after ‘The End’?

Could this mean that the Baudelaires encounter a 50m long animal at some point after ‘The End’?

(The fried egg could be a reference to Count Olaf telling the Baudelaires that the Quagmire triplets were whisking eggs as a punishment in TAA book.)

#asoue #a series of unfortunate events #asoue theories #quigley quagmire #Mrs Bass #vfd #asoue netflix #asoue books

[fullnewperfection]

Owl House: Family Guy

#youtube #the owl house #family guy #toh/fg #stewie griffin #brian griffin #lois griffin #glenn quagmire #cleveland brown #joe swanson #chris griffin #mr. herbert #consuela #luz noceda #lilith clawthorne #philip wittebane #gus porter #willow park #hunter #eda clawthorne #king clawthorne #amity blight #hooty

[visual-findings-disclosure]

Mrs. Quagmire with her children, Duncan and Isadora Quagmire

#asoue #vfd #a series of unfortunate events #vfd aesthetics #isadora quagmire #duncan quagmire #quagmire triplets #mrs quagmire

[memehex]

#polls #poll #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #the slippery slope #violet baudelaire #count olaf #mr. poe #sunny baudelaire #the grim grotto #quigley quagmire #literature #bookblr #reading #the penultimate peril

[endfought]

TAG DUMP: VIOLET

#🛠 [ ❝ the finest fourteen year old inventor in the world ❞ ] (visage: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ the most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious ❞ ] (headcanon: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ there’s always something ❞ ] (interests: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ you’d better tie your hair up ❞ ] (isms: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ i will still invent things; no matter what anyone says ❞ ] (character study: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ gears pulleys and levers ❞ ] (aesthetic: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ face the scary thing first; get scared later ❞ ] (fears: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ if everyone fought fire with fire; the whole world would go up in smoke ❞ ] (musings: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ oh by the way; you’re a terrible actor ❞ ] (shitpost: violet) #🛠 [ ❝ we can find out anything ❞ ] (relation: violet / klaus) #🛠 [ ❝ not a baby anymore; how did you become so brave? ❞ ] (relation: violet / sunny) #🛠 [ ❝ no matter where we go or what we do; he’s always watching ❞ ] (relation: violet / count olaf) #🛠 [ ❝ fierce and formidable… once ❞ ] (relation: violet / aunt josephine) #🛠 [ ❝ life is a conundrum of esoterica ❞ ] (relation: violet / uncle monty) #🛠 [ ❝ what friends are for ❞ ] (relation: violet / duncan & isadora quagmire) #🛠 [ ❝ the world is quiet here ❞ ] (relation: violet / quigley quagmire) #🛠 [ ❝ harbinger of bad news ❞ ] (relation: violet / mr. poe) #🛠 [ ❝ it is a curious thing; the death of a loved one ❞ ] (relation: violet / mother & father) #🛠 [ ❝ v: before the fire ❞ ] (pre main) #🛠 [ ❝ v: a series of unfortunate events ❞ ] (main) #🛠 [ ❝ v: a world divided ❞ ] (the dark crystal) #🛠 [ ❝ v: very fortunate indeed ❞ ] (post main) #🛠 [ ❝ the story you are about to read is extremely unpleasant ❞ ] (thread: violet) #tag dump

[protectionsquad24601]

People who say "I don't like asoue bc it's formulaic" miss the point bc

-it starts as a formula, a cycle of the Baudelaires being abused and mistreated bc IT'S A CYCLE THAT THEY'RE STUCK IN!! A cycle of evil and ignorence. They're being tossed around by the world and they need to get out of the cycle themselves.

-the cycle: they go to a new guardian, led by Mr. Poe, who ignores the problems about the situation. Count Olaf is stalking them, trying to kill the Baudelaires and steal their fortune.

-as is the rules with poetry and writing, you have to repeat something a few times to mess around with the formula, which you see is changed as early as the Miserable Mill. There's a poetic quality to the repetition, as well as when and how it changes.

-as it goes on, you see their passiveness being increasingly replaced with action that culminates at the end of the Vile Village, where they run away. In doing so, they've cut off the "new guardian" element to the cycle.

-they're trying to save the Quagmires and figure things out on their own. But two crucial elements to their cycle haven't been broken: they still are trying to contact Mr. Poe and they are still being hunted by Count Olaf.

-in the Grim Grotto, they break Mr. Poe out of the cycle.

-in the first chapter of the Bad Beginning, Mr. Poe meets the children on Briny Beach to inform them of the death of their parents. They come with him.

-at the end of Grim Grotto, they meet him again at Briny Beach and refuse to come, choosing instead to listen to a mysterious stranger and coded message. They choose autonomy. They choose to try to learn and figure things out. Active, not passive.

-in the Penultimate Peril is an effort to cut ties with Count Olaf once and for all as well as obtaining roles from both sides of VFD.

-but they can't get rid of Olaf and they can't let him go. Bc the last part of the cycle needs to be permanently put to rest.

-YES; Olaf hunts them throughout every book. That's. The. Point.

-Olaf needed to DIE before they could leave the island in The End.

-Olaf needed to die before they could move on.

-Olaf's death cut the final current in their cycle, ending the formula and therefore ending the series. Cutting out all the "repetitive" elements of the series made it finally end.

-they broke the cycle. That's why they could be free.

UGH I have so many thoughts

One day I'll write up this theory more cohesiveness.

#a series of unfortunate events #asoue #averse #lemony snicket #yes this is just a straight up rant #but im so sick of ppl complaining abt the formula #THATS THE POINT #rant #one of these days ill say this in a cohesive manner lol

[afterthegreatunknown]

List of Snicket-Verse Characters I headcanon as Asian Descent, Fully or Partly, with the One (1) Book Canonical Asian Character

The One (1) Book Canonical

Haruki [Murakami]: Japanese. Originally born in Kyoto in the Fushimi-ku ward, Haruki and his family moved to the City when he was six due to his father’s job (in the organization). When it comes to reading and writing Japanese, it isn’t as perfect as people assume, for Haruki spend more of his childhood reading and writing in English. Speaking Japanese though, Haruki can 100% do.

Headcanons Characters, ATWQ

Dashiell Qwerty: Chinese descent. Qwerty is an alias surname his family uses when out in the field for VFD. His real surname is Qiao, and whenever not in the field, volunteers call him Qiao. Or ‘Q’, if they can’t pronounce it. Dashiell has a technical middle name; his Chinese given name, Qiang. Dashiell is (was) only call Qiang by his parents.

Jackie’s Grandfather: Korean. Jackie’s grandfather full name in western order, is Pyong-ho Ahn, nickname in his youth as Moray. Phyong-ho used to manage Moray Wheels in the past in addition to racing, before retiring and allowing Jackie to take over. Phyong-ho by the present no longer goes by Moray, unless you’re a very close friend of his.

Jackie (Ahn): Korean descent. Jackie is really Jackie’s first name, though they do accept the Korean name their grandfather gave them: Jae-kyung. Jackie only answers to Jae-kyung if it’s spoken by their grandfather, their parents (now decease), and their aunt and uncle and cousin who lives in the City, finding it something special meant for family only.

The Talkie Brothers: Asian descent of different nationalities. Arthur Takei is of Japanese descent. Amit Sharma is of Indian descent. ‘Talkie Brothers’ came because many couldn’t pronounce Takei. They thought about going by “the Sherman Brothers” for some couldn’t pronounce Sharma correctly either, but that is used by a real pair of musically talent brothers.

Alice Lost, nee Takei: Japanese descent. The younger sister of Arthur Takei, Alice has a great talent of doing origami. She can make anything out of a piece of paper, but her specialty was making paper cranes. In fact, before her death, Alice was aiming to create 1,000, and had reached 1,000 exactly when the fire broke out at the Lost Arms.

Ornette Lost: Biracial. Japanese descent from her mother Alice, Irish descent from her father (Prosper immigrated to SBTS as a child with his parents). Ornette’s talent of (paper) sculptures came from watching her mother folding origami paper into cranes. Ornette feels connected to her mother when making origami cranes, and aims to fold 1,001 in her memory.

Headcanon Characters, ASOUE

Captain Widdershins: (French) Chinese Cambodian on Father’s side, and native Cambodian (Khmer) on Mother’s side. Widdershins does his best to feel connected to his former home country, be celebrating holidays that he can barely recall celebrating, making meals if the ingredients available, or speaking Khmer to himself and sometimes around Fiona. For that last one, Widdershins gave Fiona a Khmer [nick]name, though after an interaction with a volunteer, had Widdershins stopping it. Post-canon, he starts saying Fiona’s Khmer [nick]name again, usually when it's just the two of them.

Raymond ‘Q’ Quagmire: Chinese descent. Raymond is an adopted Quagmire due to his brother Dashiell’s death/murder. Raymond, like Dashiell, has a technical middle name that is his Chinese given name; Jiahao. However, for reasons, people assume Dashiell’s Chinese given name is Raymond’s, made worse because many had forgot Raymond and Dashiell are related.

Joan Quagmire [nee Morstan]: Chinese descent. Joan’s birth surname is Lau; Morstan is the surname of her adopted family. Two of Joan’s favorite games to play are Mahjong and Wei Qi (Go). While she’s not the best player of the latter, she’s brilliant in the former. Joan likes making her children (all together) play a game with her once a week; they never won.

Alex and Lindsey Morstan: Chinese descent. Being Joan’s triplet sisters, they were forced to play Mahjong and Wei Qi with her, with the latter being the game they’re best at. Alex and Lindsey are fonder of reading (translated) Chinese novels; Alex loves Journey to the West, while Lindsey enjoys Flowers in the Mirror.

Duncan, Isadora, and Quigley Quagmire: Chinese descent. Duncan, Isadora, and Quigley, pre and post canon, do their best to gain insight and feel connected to their identity, in their own ways. Duncan does it by researching Chinese history, particularly of the Chinese Dynasties (the Tang Dynasty is his favorite). Isadora does it by watching Chinese opera (she loves the costumes, and the singing style). Quigley does with the hands-on approach of preparing and cooking traditional Chinese dishes with help (parents and aunt pre-canon. Post-canon, Quigley get Hector or Widdershins’ help, sometimes the two adults together if needed).

Charles: Vietnamese descent. Charles’ full name is Charles Nguyen, the son of two Vietnamese people who lived half their lives in France before moving to the Land of Districts. Charles worked with his parents at their swanky restaurant, Nguyen Bistro; it serves traditional Vietnamese dishes as well as French dishes as an alternative. Charles took business (and cooking) classes to fully take over, but a mysterious fire that burned the restaurant and the apartment home, as well as killing his parents, changed his path.

Sir: Thai. An immigrant that came to the Land of Districts to escape his past, Sir found work at Lucky Smells Lumber Mill as a regular employee, before getting promoted to foreman. When the owner Smogface Wiley died, the mill was doom to close. However, Sir managed to get a trial run as boss, and later became the new permanent owner. Sir’s cousins working at the Mill is true; they’re the ones who made Sir escape his past in the first place. Sir had no qualms on the conditions they’re working, seeing how he survived it and worked his way upward (and maybe revenge).

(Regarding Sir’s unknown name, his first name at least, it’s Chalermchai. When he was a regular employee, Chalermchai was usually referred to or call by that didn’t require the foreman or anyone else to say his name. But when Chalermchai became foreman, people discover they were unable to say it, so Chalermchai became ‘Sir.’ Not many people call Sir by his first name nowadays. Charles says it, and even then, it’s rare.)

R, Duchess of Winnipeg: Biracial. Japanese descent from her father, Ryutaro (Second generation Japanese-Canadian), and French from her mother, Sabine (French from France and French Canadian). R is a naming pattern from her father’s family, for in Sabine’s family, no one ever had an ‘R’ name before (Sabine does have the alias of ‘Rhea’ though). R isn’t connected to her Japanese heritage as much as she likes; the most she knows of is Japanese theater, mainly Kabuki. The R engrave ring was something Sabine did herself, much to her mother (R’s Grand-Mère Thea) disapproval, for Sabine wanted the ring to be special for R when she gets it.

R’s heir, Ramona Q, and the Q stands for Quach (Quách): She's the daughter of two Vietnamese refugees who were very good friends with R. They confided to R about the odd interactions Ramona had with her local librarian, leading to R telling them things to do to keep their daughter safe. When Ramona’s parents died in a fire, R decided to adopt Ramona to lessen VFD’s influence. R loves Ramona very much, being an honorary aunt to the girl before adopting her, and does her best to let Ramona be connected to her culture (clothing, music, food; food is most common and accessible one of all).

#asoue #a series of unfortunate events #atwq #all the wrong questions #dashiell qwerty #alice lost #ornette lost #captain widdershins #mr. quagmire #mrs. quagmire #quagmire triplets #duncan quagmire #isadora quagmire #quigley quagmire #charles asoue #sir asoue #duchess of winnipeg #haruki [murakami] #headcanons #book verse #tagging only those that i feel are more noticeable/known #charles #sir #r

[magicandarchery]

Six Sentence Sunday, Feb. 25, 2024

Hey look at this! I'm early today y'all! Mostly because the homies in the discord are super amazing at sharing knowledge and that's how I found StimuWrite, so my ND ass has actually gotten words out this week.

I've been tagged by the always wonderful @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @violetbaudelaire-quagmire and @bigassbowlingballhead

Also with a huge thanks again to @getmehighonmagic for enabling this one.

More from the first chapter of lay me down, give me something to feel:

Henry retrieves his phone and glances at the email notification: COMPANION MATCH. He feels his stomach turn, the way it does when you're keeping a secret. Henry will let Shaan in on the secret eventually, but for now Henry swipes the email open as Shaan clears his throat. "Is everything alright, sir?" "Mm," Henry nods, "yes, everything is fine. Thank you, Shaan." He turns his attention to the email again, reading slowly to try and keep his face neutral. Mr. Fox, Please find attached a profile overview of the companion we feel best matches your needs. You can view a more detailed profile and set up the first meeting with your companion here should you choose to accept this match. Please do not hesitate to reach out if you wish to be matched with a different companion or have any questions. Regards, Z. Bankston

Leaving an open tag for anyone with words, but also: @anincompletelist @kiwiana-writes @inexplicablymine @heybuddy-drabbles @affectionatelyrs @sparklepocalypse @eusuntgratie @littlemisskittentoes @cha-melodius @getmehighonmagic @wordsofhoneydew @firenati0n @i-am-freyja @nocoastposts @happiness-of-the-pursuit

#six sentence sunday #wip: lay me down give me something to feel #wip: lmdgmstf #my fic #first prince #firstprince #firstprince fanfic #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #henry hanover stuart fox #otp: on our own terms

[sparklepocalypse]

Hello! I missed Six Sentence Sunday for reasons of life happening, but I'm back today, bitches and non-bitches! 🥰 Thank you so much to the absolute cavalcade of fantastic humans who tagged me today, including @alasse9, @zwiazdziarka, @heysweetheart-writes, @violetbaudelaire-quagmire, @cha-melodius, @captainjunglegym, @wordsofhoneydew, @piratefalls, @orchidscript, @firenati0n, @priincebutt, @kiwiana-writes, @getmehighonmagic, and @duchessdepolignaca03! My tag is open, but @hgejfmw-hgejhsf, I'm calling on you specifically because I haven't seen your name in my feed yet. ❤️

Today I bring you another lil' chonk of my @aroyallybigbangrwrb fic, Meet Me on the Other Side, a Western AU featuring runaway prince Henry and bounty hunter Alex. And when I say I have been having the most fun finding 19th-century slang terms to pepper into the fic... there's just a lot of pepper, okay?

The Sunfall Inn is located just off the Marcelina town square. It’s rather flash, by Alex’s reckoning, but he’s never been the sort to be bullocked by the corn cob aristocracy in this part of the country, and he assumes this Mr. Srivastava won’t be any different. He’s right and wrong on that front. Mr. Srivastava is an unassuming, brown-skinned feller of a height with Alex, wearing a natty black three-piece suit and a chimney pot hat. But when he opens his mouth to introduce himself, it’s clear to Alex that this man has spent a fair portion of his life around the type of fancy folk who don’t have much cause for visiting towns like this one. “Mr. Claremont-Diaz, I presume,” he says, extending a hand to shake. He speaks with a genteel accent, and Alex feels himself straightening up just a tad. “My name is Shaan Srivastava. I appreciate your punctuality.” “Call me Alex, Mr. Srivastava. Everyone else does,” Alex replies, shaking his hand firmly. “Guessing some measure of secrecy might be in order here?” “You’re correct,” Shaan says. Alex notices that he doesn’t invite the use of his first name. It's awfully starched of him, Alex decides, but the bounty’s more than enough to warrant his continued attention. Alex nods. “If you don’t mind a walk, there’s a trail not far from here that leads to a little glade, and nobody goes there during the day. At night, well, if you aren’t partial to seeing some feller in his birthday suit dipping into the sweets of his best girl – or his best boy, if he’s of that persuasion – best you avoid the glade at night.” “Are you certain it’s secure?” Shaan asks. His hand rises subtly at his side but stills, and Alex wonders what he might be hiding that’s made him so nervous. “You’ll be with me,” Alex replies. “You’ll be safe as houses, sunshine.” “Not precisely what I meant,” Shaan sputters, but Alex is already gesturing at the side door of the inn, next to the bar, and walking toward it, and after a moment, Shaan follows.

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #rwrb fic #my fic #alex claremont diaz #henry hanover stuart fox #alex x henry #firstprince #rwrb movie #wip: rbb #western au

[bigassbowlingballhead]

WIP Wednesday 3/13/2024

I'm posting super early today with no tags yet. So here's a bit of the ryliver fic that came out of me so effortlessly last night. So please, no pressure since i think most of you don't know much about them other than my posts.

There’s a knock at the door, “Mr. Guzman, Mr. Stark. They’re ready for you,” a soft voice says through the door. “Tell them we’ll be right there!” Ryan says through the door. He waits a moment to make sure he hears the PA’s step heading away from them before he turns to Oliver and approaches him slowly. “Here’s what’s going to happen. We’re going to eat some cake, answer some questions and take some pictures.” He hooks his finger in the collar of Oliver’s wine stained shirt, “then, when we’re done,” Oliver gulps, “you’re going to take me home and fuck me senseless.” They eat some cake and pose for some pictures with Gavin, Angela, and Peter. One shot happens to catch the exact moment Oliver whispers to Ryan something about his ass. It takes every ounce of willpower Ryan has to not to say fuck it and bend over on top of this dry ass cake right now and let Oliver rail him until he saw god. But he can’t; that would be illegal. There are children present. So he eats the dry ass cake, and tries not to think about Oliver’s thick cock stretching him. 

no pressure tags (i want to read your stuff!): @sparklepocalypse @anincompletelist @eusuntgratie @nocoastposts @getmehighonmagic @magicandarchery @violetbaudelaire-quagmire @cha-melodius @littlemisskittentoes @heybuddy-drabbles @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @sunnysideprince @affectionatelyrs @happiness-of-the-pursuit @captainjunglegym @lostcol @firenati0n @onward--upward @wordsofhoneydew @sincenewyorks

side tag for @suavecitodiaz just to see this 😏

#wip wednesday #ryliver #ryliver fic #jon writes now?

[agaypanic]

hi can i req a quigley quagmire x fem reader fic?? maybe has something to do with him being jealous + lots of fluff <33

Jealousy Gets You Nowhere (Quigley Quagmire X Reader)

Masterlist

Request Something!

Summary: Quigley doesn’t like the fact that Y/n and Klaus are friends.

A/N: AU where the Baudelaires and Quagmires aren’t orphans lol

***

Quigley Quagmire, like his siblings, always tried to stay optimistic. He believed that looking for a light would prevent you from getting lost in darkness. He was very trusting, quick to make new friends.

So it surprised you when your boyfriend didn’t seem to like one of your new friends, Klaus Baudelaire, that much.

You thought they would’ve gotten along perfectly. They were both interested in learning, especially about niche subjects. They were highly intelligent. Duncan and Isadora seemed to take a liking to Klaus, and usually the Quagmire triplets made pretty similar decisions when it came to who to befriend and trust.

Luckily, Klaus didn’t seem to notice. He didn’t notice how quickly Quigley disguised his displeasure when you introduced them to each other. He didn’t mind when Quigley gave a curt nod instead of shaking Klaus’ hand that was reaching out to him. He didn’t voice his confusion when Quigley’s eyes started darting between him and you with anger and accusation.

But you did. You saw it all, but had no idea why he was acting like this. He was just fine before you opened the door for Klaus. It’s not like Klaus was rude to Quigley in any way. But you had to hold back your questions until the Baudelaire boy had left, not wanting to make him feel unwelcome by pointing out Quigley’s behavior.

“Are you okay?” You asked your boyfriend as soon as the front door closed behind Klaus. You turned to see his expression was noticeably brighter.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” He asked, acting like his entire encounter (or lack thereof) with Klaus hadn’t happened. “Come on, Mom’s making lunch.” He held his hand out for you to take. You sighed before smiling at him. Maybe Quigley was just having an off day and didn’t want to be around a new person. So you decided to let it go.

“Okay.” You took his hand and made your way to the kitchen to see what Mrs. Quagmire was making.

***

If Quigley was having an off day, then he must have been having an off month. Whenever you as much as mentioned Klaus, sourness overtook him, and you had no idea why. But you had a plan to fix it. Klaus had invited you to the library for the afternoon and, with his permission, you dragged Quigley along. You had a feeling that if he knew Klaus would be there, he would make up some excuse to keep the both of you from going. So you decided to just “forget” that little detail.

“Hey, Klaus!” You whispered excitedly to your friend when you spotted him at a table, a small pile of books on it with one open in front of him. He lifted his head to smile at you and your boyfriend.

“Y/n, Quigley! Glad you could make it.” He responded in the same hushed but delighted tone. Quigley pulled out a chair for you to sit in and sat between you and Klaus. Your boyfriend looked at you, irritated that you neglected to tell him that this wasn’t a date to the library but a group hangout with someone he couldn’t seem to stand.

“Sorry we took so long. Quigley needed some convincing to get out of the house.” You said. Klaus waved you off.

“I get that. If I’m being honest, I’m really only here because I’ve read every book in our library.” It amazed you how big of a reader Klaus was. He soaked up every piece of information like a sponge that never stopped expanding.

“Every book?” Quigley asked, arms crossed. He seemed just interested in how Klaus could manage to read so much, but you could tell that he was in disbelief that he could do such a thing. As if it was impossible and Klaus only said it to be impressive.

“It took a while, but yes, every book.” Klaus smiled at your boyfriend, before looking at you. “Speaking of books, I found that one you recommended to me. It’s very interesting so far.”

“I knew you’d like it!” You grinned, seeing that the book you had suggested to Klaus was the one he was reading now. You stood from your seat. “I’ll be right back. I’m gonna grab a book I’ve been looking for.”

“I’ll come with you.” Quigley said eagerly. He stood up and pulled you away from the table and towards the maze of bookcases, despite not knowing what book you were looking for. You started leading the way when he was about to pass the section you knew the book was in. “Why didn’t you tell me he would be here?” Your boyfriend asked with annoyance as he watched you search the shelves.

“You wouldn’t have come if I told you.” You shrugged. “What’s your problem with Klaus, Quigley? He’s been nothing but friendly to you since the start.”

“Oh, and I bet he’s been just friendly to you as well.” Although your back was turned to him, you could feel his eyes roll. You turned around.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Don’t tell me you’re blind, Y/n.” Quigley huffed. When you didn’t budge, he started to do an impression of your friend. “Look at me, I’m so smart. I’ve read every book in my library. I’m such a genius. Oh, Y/n, I love your book recommendations. I’d read every book under the sun if you suggested it because I love words!” You had to hold back a laugh. Sure, it was funny, but this was your friend that Quigley was making fun of.

“He doesn’t sound like that.” You said as you turned back around, trying to find the book you wanted.

“I don’t know. I think I was spot on.” 

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were jealous.” Quigley didn’t respond. Finally spotting the book on a higher shelf, you looked around for a stool to drag over. You set one up and looked at him. “Oh my god, Quigley, you are jealous.”

“No, I’m not.” He rolled his eyes, but he moved to stand beside you when you stood up on the stool. Even though you were balanced, he put a hand on your hip, just in case. 

“I think you are.”

“I’m not.” He said with finality. He glanced up to see you pull out a book. “Did he recommend that to you?” You smiled, taking his hand as you stepped down to the floor.

“Nope.” You turned the book cover to him. “You did.” He looked at the title and it was indeed the book that he was talking to you about earlier that week. He didn’t technically suggest it for you to read, but he knew that you liked trying to show an interest in the things he was interested. 

“Oh…” He didn’t really know what to say now. You squeezed his hand.

“Klaus and I are just friends, Quigley. I only have eyes for you. I’m dating you, after all.”

“I’m sorry.” He said sheepishly.

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to. Klaus has been nothing but kind, and your jealousy made you a bit of a jerk.” You started to walk back to the table, pulling him with you. “Come on. Time to say sorry.” 

Quigley tugged you back before the two of you could get too far. Wrapping his arm around you, he kissed your forehead before resting his head on yours.

“I’m sorry, N/n. I just don’t like sharing you, I guess.” You smiled.

“It’s okay. You just have to get used to it.” He nodded and the two of you broke apart, hands still interlocked. “And get used to it fast, because I’m having lunch with his sisters tomorrow.” Quigley groaned behind you as you two walked towards the table.

“There’s more of them?”

#quigley quagmire x reader #quigley quagmire #asoue #asoue x reader #a series of unfortunate events #a series of unfortunate events x reader #agaypanic

[curiouscreationss]

ASOUE characters: How popular are they on Ao3?✨📚😎😮🫢

No.of fics with each character in them

Baudelaires:

Beatrice: 417

Bertrand: 257

🔧Violet: 977 🏆

📚Klaus: 822

🍳 Sunny: 662

👶 Beatrice II: 192

Quagmires:

Mrs Quagmire: 34

Mr Quagmire: 28

🖋️Isadora: 369 🏆

🗞️ Duncan: 367

🗺️ Quigley: 332 (Surprising tbh, I thought he’d win out of the triplets at least)

Widdershins:

⚓️Captain Widdershins: 40

🍄 Fiona: 114

🪝 Fernald: 166 🏆

Olaf+his troupe:

🎭 Count Olaf: 722 🏆

🍸 Esmé Squalor: 379

Woman with hair but no beard: 30

Man with beard but no hair: 25

👓 Georgina Orwell: 143

Henchperson of indeterminate gender: 84

Bald man: 57

White-faced women: 56 (just mildly less popular than the bald man yet there’s TWO of them- that’s gotta blow 😔-)

🎪[The Freaks] 🎪

Kevin: 14 🏅

Hugo: 13

Collette: 12

Denouements:

Frank: 76

Ernest: 92

🦄: 102 🏆

Snickets: (Take this with a grain of salt bc they have a whole other series -ATWQ- going for them)

Jaques: 347

Kit: 410

Lemony: 536 🏆

Guardians+the likes:

🏦 Mr Poe: 104

🗞️ Eleanora Poe: 14

📰 Polly Poe: 1

🐑 Edgar Poe: 10

💰 Albert Poe: 6 (Why is Edgar more popular??)

🐍Uncle Monty: 114

🐍 Ink/The Incredibly Deadly Viper: 8

🪟 Aunt Josephine: 72

Ike Anwhistle: 26

[🚬 Sir: 30

Charles: 54

👓 Georgina Orwell: 143 🏅

😃 Phil: 10 ]

[🎻Vice Principal Nero: 37 (That’s less than the bald man who has maybe 3 lines total, take that!)

Mrs Bass: 4 (Damn.)

Ms. Tench: 2 (Double damn)

Mr Remora: 3

📚 Olivia Caliban: 237 🏅]

🍸 Jerome Squalor: 104

(✨Esmé Squalor: 379 but I put her in the Olaf’s troupe section. This is just for quick comparison to Jerome. Poor guy. Ish. I don’t actually feel that bad for him tbh.)

🦅 The Council of Elders: 4

🎈 Hector: 48

Hal: 8

Babs: 9

Phil: 10

[🍎 Ishmael: 17

🐟 Miranda Caliban: 8

🕶️ Friday Caliban: 26 🏅

🚢 Thursday: 5 ]

Miscellaneous VFD members:

😎 Jacquelyn Scieszka: 172 🏆

🎥 Gustav Sebald: 78

🐟 Larry Your-Waiter: 85

👑 Duchess R of Winnipeg: 61 or 64 (3 are under ‘Duchess R’

Uncategorised:

Ben: 4

🚲 The Paperboy: 3

💃 Carmelita Spats: 149

Top 3:

1~ Violet Baudelaire! 🔧💜 (977 fics on Ao3 are tagged ‘Violet Baudelaire’! 🎉)

2~Klaus Baudelaire!!📚💙(822 fics!)

3~ Count Olaf! 👁️ 😈 (722 fics!)

Loser:

Polly Poe (with a disappointing 1 fic!😱)

#asoue #asoue fic #a series of unfortunate events #soue #ao3 #asoue fanfic #klaus baudelaire #Violet Baudelaire #Sunny Baudelaire #beatrice baudelaire #bertrand baudelaire #lemony snicket #kit Snicket #Jaques Snicket #quagmire triplets #Baudelaire children #Baudelaire orphans #fiona widdershins #fernald widdershins #count Olaf #esmé squalor #jerome squalor #Charles #sir #jacquelyn scieszka #olivia caliban #the denouements #dewey denouement #ernest denouement #gustav sebald

[all-eyes-lead-to-the-truth]

All Eyes Lead to the Truth | Quagmire (3x22)

She was leaving him, just like his last mommy.

There was a ringing noise followed by all the lights turning on as she ran around their home. His heart started pounding in his chest as she began grabbing all the stuff that she’d marked with her scent: her clothes, the brush with her fur, and even her shoes! What was he supposed to chew on now?!

“Don’t go!” he pled, trying to get her attention by walking in between her feet.

“Queequeg, no barking,” she chastised softly.

With a whine, he stepped back, bowing his head to the floor. He didn’t like being alone. He didn’t know what he’d done wrong. He never saw Mrs. Lowe again after he hurt her, but he’d been trying so hard to be a good boy for Scully.

He was just about to start begging again when she took his favorite toy and put it in the bag next to her favorite toy, perking him up immediately. “We’re going to go for a ride in the car, Queequeg,” she explained.

“Car!” he exclaimed, standing up so he could put his paws on her legs.

“Yep,” she nodded. “My friend Mulder is going to come get us. Remember him?”

His tail began to wag harder, almost knocking him off balance from the force. He loved Mulder! When Mulder came to visit or when he called, Scully was always so happy. If she had a tail, he knew it would be wagging too.

Mulder wouldn’t pet him if Scully was watching. He must be shy. When he was alone, Mulder would scratch his ears and rub his tummy and say how lucky Queequeg was. He was lucky! She always let him sit by her, even if she was in bed, and she always pet him and kissed him. Queequeg was loved.

* * *

“Scully… Do you really think bringing him is a good idea?” Mulder asked.

“Don’t start, Mulder,” she replied, using the same tone she used when something was in his mouth that shouldn’t have been. The command had a similar effect on Mulder as he raised his hands in surrender.

“I’ll be good!” Queequeg told him while pacing excitedly at Mulder’s feet. Scully sighed and walked back towards her room, leaving them alone at the front door.

“At least one of you is happy to see me,” Mulder grumbled, leaning down to scratch behind Queequeg’s ears.

If Scully was his mom, did that mean Mulder was his dad? Queequeg never had a dad before. When he was called Scout, Mrs. Lowe never had a Mulder. She had Bald Guy, but Bald Guy didn’t look at her like Mulder looked at Scully. Mulder looked at her like he wanted to sit in her lap and lick her face, and sometimes Scully looked at him the same way. It was weird they didn’t just groom each other.

* * *

Wow! This was the best day of Queequeg’s life! He got to spend all day with his favorite people. During his walk with Scully, he even found the thing Mulder had been whining about!

All day, he kept talking about “Big Blue.” Luckily for him, blue was one of the only colors Queequeg could see. And see he did. Right when he was about to take a poo, he noticed a big, blue animal crouching in the woods.

“Look! It’s Big Blue!” he yelled, lurching forward while ignoring the leash tugging on his neck.

“Come on, Queequeg,” she replied. 

She wasn’t taking him seriously, so he tried again. “It’s Mulder’s friend!”

“Queequeg, we're not going to go into the woods. Come on, do your business. I thought you had to go.” 

He kept pulling on the leash, begging her to come with him. Mulder would be so proud of him! “Queequeg! What is it?” she exclaimed, reluctantly following him.

She must’ve been scared, but she shouldn’t be. He was here to protect her. Big Blue bared his teeth at the pair, and Queequeg felt his tail stand straight up. With a surge of anger, he rushed towards the creature, breaking free of his leash. “Don’t look at her like that!” Queequeg yelled.

He heard her yelling at him, but Queequeg was on a mission. He had to defend his family.

* * *

He didn’t know when the man in the black robe picked him up, but he was relieved. For a second there, Queequeg thought he was about to be eaten! It’s amazing how much bigger the creature looked up close.

“Where am I?” he barked, looking around.

“Home,” the man said, his face obscured by the clothes he was wearing.

Queequeg whimpered and bowed his head in shame. He knew Scully didn’t like him wandering away from her. He’d scared her, and now he didn’t know how to find her again. She was going to be so mad at him.

“Scully thinks you’re a good boy,” the man in black said. Queequeg felt his heart thump excitedly in his chest. “You were always such a good boy.”

The man set him down, but when Queequeg tried to follow him, he tsked, adjusting his grip on the large scythe he was holding. “There’s someone here who’s been wanting to see you.”

Queequeg cocked his head to the side before he caught a whiff of a familiar scent. Then, a voice from far behind him called out his name, “Scout!”

His old Mom!! His legs couldn’t run fast enough, he kept tripping over his feet from the force of his tail wagging so hard.

“I missed you so much,” Mrs. Lowe beamed, holding him close to her chest while he licked the water off her face. “I’m so sorry I left you alone.”

He knows he did much worse to her, but he can tell by the way she’s kissing him that she forgives him. Maybe she hadn’t wanted to leave him after all. 

This really was the best day of his life.

Read the rest of All Eyes Lead to the Truth on Ao3

@gaycrouton

#all eyes lead to the truth #mulder #scully #msr #x files #fanfic #x files fanfic #queequeg #quagmire #season three #s3 #3x22