RuPaul's Drag Race: Boom! You’re Roasted
Michelle and Loni to Utica: Try not to be so mean.
Utica: *Mean Girl to the extreme*
The remaining six queens learned that this week they were doing the infamous roast challenge, but instead of the usual suspects - they’d be fucking with three former Miss Congenialities; Nina West, reigning Miss Heidi N Closet, and fan favorite, Linda Evangelista aka Valentina. There were nerves coming from our resident top 2 - Gottmik and Symone - however, one of them wound up rising to the challenge while the other one sadly sailed to the bottom of the barrel alongside a nice girl gone rotten.
When the girls went to practice their routines in front of Michelle and Loni Love, they warned Utica that her jokes had kind of crossed the line. Roasts are supposed to be funny, but not in a cruel bully sort of way. I think we all knew when the previews aired last week that this challenge was not going to go well for the small town queen because well, whatever she has believed to be funny or comedy her whole life...just ain’t it. The judges may’ve been questioning Utica’s performance, but they were left doing nothing more than praising Kandy and Rose. Those two won the mini-challenge and with that chose the eventual order. They placed themselves at the beginning and the end and while we see queens run from those positions every season, it was nice to see them step up and fucking slay opening and closing the show - which wasn’t hard given the bottom three were…
Utica was mean, but Symone and Olivia were just a mix of nerves and bad timing. However, were we not considering their ensembles tonight? To me, Symone and Olivia were as equally cringy to watch but each had at least one semi-strong joke...the looks though? Symone was stunning and Olivia walked out like she asked Derrick Berry to sew her look. Was that just fabric wrapped around her?
So it was a little shocking to see Symone wind up lip-syncing next to the obvious trainwreck of the week. Thankfully RuPaul knows damn well Symone is a finale Queen and she stayed. This means Utica was sent packing but can we all agree that she is probably the only queen to act as happy as an overall winner when packing her shit to head home?
Next week is another acting challenge and while I truly believe in my top 3 fantasy of Symone, Gottmik, and Rose - I have no idea if it’ll play out like I want because I didn’t expect to ever see Symone in the bottom in a challenge that centered around comedy. Singing? Yes, but making us laugh? Hell. No. I am hoping I’m right once again and that we’re saying goodbye to the sweetest queen since…
Roast Looks Ranked:
Gottmik: In a perfect world I could look amazing in that dress
Rose: Always bringing Jem and the Hologram realness
Symone: A vision in gold
Kandy Muse: Fashion Nova, but one of her best looks all season
Utica: A lot of great pieces that could only work together on a queen like her
Week 12 Rankings & Reasonings:
Gottmik - This is one of the only, if not the first, time that I’ve put Gottmik at the top of my leaderboard but from the look to the performance - how could I not. As amazing as Symone is, Gottmik hasn’t had to lip-sync for her life
Symone - For the love of gawd, don’t let this girl stumble now
Rose - Another solid week
Kandy Muse - Did I not say last week she wasn’t going to fuck up the roast?
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I started questioning my sexuality about a two years ago. I liked boys, and I was sure of that, but I adored girls too.
I thought it was just that I adored girls but then I finally realized, oh wait, I spend like 90% of my free time freaking out over gorgeous actresses and fictional girls. I’m probably bi.
Nina Zenik (from the six of crows series) was probably my bi awakening. XD.
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This video was so damn good! Just, he seems so comfortable talking about these past stories from the closet and I love hearing his perspective from now that he’s older, wiser and out. The video had everything; gay panic in every single story (hypnosis guy, Phil himself, sneaky message lad), gays hopelessly falling in love with strangers in the span of about two seconds, very weird ways to attract someone’s romantic attention, being brave and hitting someone up first (way to go, Phil!!), Phil being so damn understanding of other closeted people working through their stuff, proof that Phil lived fanfiction shit before even meeting Dan (it was always leading up to him, huh?) and just this soft comfort about the whole thing. That’s how I best can describe it. I felt comforted by Phil, and as someone who isn’t really out to anyone in real life, I felt reminded that there are fellow queer people out there, in and out of closets being just as fumbling awkward as myself but also kind and understanding. Thank you so much for that video, Mr Amazing. Phil is seriously such a charismatic story teller, I love that about him.
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