#no life or whatever energy

[that-love-is-all-there-is]

animism just makes sense to me

#I don't believe we live in a dead universe #where most things have no spirit #no life or whatever energy #I have a doll that is almost old as me #and she is imbued with the spirit of all the love she's been given and has given #and has a powerful spiritual energy about her #and that's a human made object #I don't have all the language for it yet but I can't abandon this because it is in my bones

[son1c]

i got you

#sonic #sonic the hedgehog #sth #shadow the hedgehog #sonic au #falling stars au #scribbles #so this part will (most likely) never be written out cuz it's like. The Implied Prologue or whatever but #i've always pictured it as sonic holds onto his super form for as long as he can and it only fades completely after they hit the ground... #which 1) saves his life and 2) brings shadow a little comfort as they fall to earth cuz of super's Big Positive Energy #just a little lore from me to u...

[bongosinferno]

A devastating and confusing thing about the Fallout setting, when you explore the pre-war aspects, is what the creators think about pre-war America. In the first games we only get hints of the pre-war world, but they seem to be some sort of wild fascist nation invading Canada. In Fallout 1, the first thing we're introduced to of the pre-war society is seeing a soldier shoot civilians and laughing.

Now, for the first 2 games and New Vegas we don't really know much. What we know is that there's a fascist military group known as the enclave who were a sort of US deep state even before the war, and that the government teamed up with corporate interests to preform vaguely MKULTRA-ish experiments with the Vaults. Basically, the government was an extreme version of the 50s American jingoism and McCarthyism.

This is well and dandy, I guess issues come up more when we get to the later games, especially 4, where it seems like none of this extreme plotting and societal civil unrest which would exist is seen. The society as presented in 4 also seems quite progressive, gay people are featured in the opening, and none of the baggage of say, civil rights not existing are included. Now on a baseline, I don't want settings to be more conservative, homophobic and sexist etc., but it becomes a very confusing setting when it's displayed both as this jingoist extreme thing with fascist tendencies aswell as a progressive place where everyone is seemingly equal. If you're focusing on the 50s as your setting, and American nationalism in the 50s, then you can't have McCarthyism spoofs and anti-communism as a societal paranoia norm while also general equality is the norm without misunderstanding why McCarthyism and nationalist jingoism is bad. A massive harm done in anti-communist paranoia is how it degrades and vilifies any progressive movements (women's rights, civil rights, homosexuality) as being morally un-American and therefore connected to communism. To ignore this just makes any critique of MacCarthyism and jingoism weird!

Basically, pre-war America in Fallout 4 becomes this both sides thing where America is both pure and equal and white fences in every instance that we see as the player (the intro), while also supposedly being this dystopic MacCarthyist hellscape that's broadcasting gladly about their war crimes in Canada, and wants to root out communism. I guess the only fix for this issue without getting into the fine print like they had to do is just not to focus too much on the pre-war world.

#fallout #fallout 1 #fallout 2 #fallout 3 #fallout 4 #fallout new vegas #fo1 #fo2 #fonv #fo4 #I'm almost half-way through the show #it suffers from this too but whatever I'm just going to count it as it's own thing #it gets a pass or whatever. telling a video game story and telling a tv-series is completely different #they can do what they think is useful. #We see a bit of what the I'm talking about in New Vegas with mr house being able to be that rich etc #but new vegas cares more about the fallout of Fallout 2 + new ideas than some pre-war America. The most we get is like Poseidon energy and #Raul. but Raul doesn't really care that much about the details of the past world #his life seems pretty normal. it's not that important. #dead money and owb did this like... Okay. wasn't too bad it was fine. I don't like those DLCs too much. Dean Domino is whatever

[felsicveins]

Animus

#trolls #trolls 3 #trolls band together #jd ex husband #it was a julien day for sure #john dory #jd trolls #trolls jd #i guess i should make a tag for julien #trolls oc julien #nice #trolls oc #i have fucking vampire empire in my head BFJEJFJVJRBSJ #maybe thats where the energy of this sketch came from #jd is mistrustful of julien because he was worried julien would kill him for his life insurance money #but he ALSO mistrustful because julien lip synchs #they would perform together in mount rageous but julien would never ad lib with jd #and then one day he found out why when he tried to sing into juliens mic and it wasnt on #anyway! lore in the tags lol #this is too much i understand but .. whatever .. we are having fun 😎

[bo0tleg]

Decided to make one of these for Top Gun: Maverick too, you know... to dispel the pain I caused with my last post...

(this is my whatsapp history, not direct quotes from the movie)

(in the first one, I'm aware it looks like There's a 30 min gab between both messages. There is not, my internet just decided that they were going to let me see the message 30 min later)

#Just noticed everything in tgm is very.... Brown #Btw the one with the wife and the 'im superior to any Man in ur life' are from THE SAME CONVERSATION #It's literally in the same screenshot #I didn't even need to take another one #tg:m #top gun maverick #top gun #iceman x maverick #pete maverick mitchell #icemav #tgm #tom iceman kazansky #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #natasha phoenix trace #mickey fanboy garcia #reuben payback fitch #payback fitch #robert bob floyd #robert floyd #jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #beau cyclone simpson #solomon warlock bates #I will NOT be specifying who Rooster and Phoenix mean #(it's Hangman) #(It's his energy) #(I just don't ship hangster and don't want to imply that) #(they're just gossiping in my head but you can think whatever you want)

[intotheelliwoods]

Little doodle from last night, since it has just occurred to me how hard it might be to tie on a mask with one hand...

#2 arms left #rottmnt #hey collab comic dropping in a few min btw :) #also for whatever reason my energy was so zapped yesterday #could barely draw for the life of me #maybe today will be better though

[noxious-fennec]

A redraw of an old thing because exam season is the only time i get creative energy ig

#but no fr i just came home from 2 consecutive exams. like consecutive as in one after the other in 2 hours #next week is all finals and theyre all like 2 hours 1 in the morning and 1 in the afternoon like bro #whatevs tho medical update THE MEDS ARE WORKING alhamdulilallah i feel im getting way more energy :) #2 years on immunosuppressants and at least 3 months of corticosteroids which means no salt :( BUT we are getting thru it #im cooking again :') #ok enough my life is not what you're here for. idk if cbeeduo at the end of 2023 *is* but idc #i just rly missed them yk and the vibes and the place i was in plus i have fun drawing them so suck it #i hope my good cbee mutuals enjoy this love yall #my art #dsmp fanart #cranboo #ctubbo #cbeeduo #fashion notes for the cool peeps still reading is i am dying on the hill that cranboo was decked in a 70s aunt wardrobe argue with the wall #also tubbo cowboy cus. like. look at him. #will probably draw tommy next i rly miss him. nothing big as always im a doodle kinda guy at heart #anyway xoxo love yall still here <33 #fennec.art

[writterings]

hate when therapists get suspicious when you're well educated on mental health and/or are self aware. sir i live here. of course i'm going to be able to articulate myself well about my mental illness. that does not mean im making it up.

#oh well. my therapist is this no nonsense older guy #he's nice and surprisingly validating and even confirmed i have ptsd #but like he just says shit sometimes and im like hm you are a short term 'depression and anxiety' therapist #not a therapist for whatever the fuck i got going on #like he plans to end treatment in june and i'm like sir i'm probably going to be in therapy on and off for my entire adult life #but oh well i don't have the energy to look for a new one and he helps a #bit so we're sticking with him

[ageless-aislynn]

The one thing I regret the most is that I can't support everybody as much as I wish I could. I want to comment on everything my mutuals say because whatever they posted is important to them, so it's important to me, too! I want to comment on and reblog every fic they write, everything they draw, every GIFset they make, every headcanon post, every theory they put forth. I just want them to know how much I value them and their opinions and the things they create and I just inevitably miss so much and it makes me sad.

#mutuals my beloved #honestly you don't even have to be one of my mutuals for me to feel this way #i want to support everybody #i want all fics to be read and have comments #i want all creative posts whatever they are to feel appreciated #if you post about your day i want to like that post so you know someone saw it and they care #it just... burns me that i can't do this for everybody #i can't even do it consistently for a handful of people #i know nobody expects that #it's just how i feel #i feel helpless sometimes in life #and this makes me feel like i can support somebody and can maybe make their day a little better in this way #and i want to do it #you ought to see my list of to-be-read fics #i WANT to be reading them all #but if i don't have the time or the energy to comment i don't want to read and then forget to comment you know? #commenting on fics and vids and art posts is important to me #anyway i'm just rambling #i just wanted to let you know if i've failed to comment on or interact with in someway something of yours it's not because i don't care #i just didn't get there yet #or it slipped through the swiss cheese holes in my brain somehow #but i love you and support you and you're so important and i want you to always know that okay? #ageless aislynn

[furiousgoldfish]

every time I ask myself 'what would my parents do' i know exactly what. they would find a service worker to be rude to. it works for every situation.

#shitpost #joke #i don't ask myself this very often lol #however i believe my conclusion is completely true #they would also put pressure on every person in their midst to resolve whatever problem they have for them #and they themselves would just look for other ways to suck out energy and life out of human population #gross parasites

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

the high prices of fucking Everything is so exhausting i stg

#i need to take an uber to the vet TEN MINUTES AWAY #i repeat IT IS A TEN MINUTE DRIVE #and its gonna cost me nearly 60 bucks. the FUCK #and who knows how much the checkup for my cats is gonna cost #let alone whatever prescription they need for the long drive #im so tired. im so so tired #its moments like these where i can see my future #ah yes. working 9-5 for a company that sees me as nothing more than a tool to be replaced when broken #just barely scraping by on minimum wage in a world where that isnt enough to pay for essentials #left with no time or energy to actually enjoy being alive or do the things i love #years and years of the same exact shit over and over and over again hating every second #and KNOWING it could be so much better but also knowing that it fucking Cant. sigh #sorry sorry im just. angry again at the absolute state of things #i would love to love life but my fucking god the world at large makes it tough #white-knuckling the little things once again #man its just. its so STUPID lmao #like why are we torturing ourselves like this? why are we just Accepting this #life could be so great but stupid shit like taxes and inflation and utilities exist #most of the shit we have to pay for should be free. it should be free. #it shouldnt be difficult to Live just because the majority of us don't have the fake fucking paper to buy things #its pointless its ridiculous and it makes me furious #why should i kill myself just to survive huh. why should i. why should any of us. #we all deserve to fuckin. idk enjoy sunsets and good food and art and each others' company. #instead everyone's stressing themselves to death over making rent and getting groceries and paying bills. fuck. #id love to be able to create art that Sells and open a shop or something #but also the thought of creating purposefully marketable art purely to make money fucking kills me inside #comms are one thing but... just... sighing sighing sighing. man idk #i just dont know. ill deal but everytime i manage to think positively reality comes in with a sledgehammer and now i want to go back to bed #the point is to live BUT YA CANT FUCKIN LIVE BC POINTLESS STUFF REIGNS SUPREME. WHO'S GONNA COMMIT ARSON W ME CMON LETS GO #this stupid fucking country and this stupid fucking government. i hate it here

[gentlebeard]

i miss my blorbos and i miss my friends :((

#if life could just give me one fucking moment to breathe that would be great #instead i have to deal with a shit load of exhausting personal matters and annoying relatives and now a nasty eye infection on top of that #so my energy for tumblr and editing is sadly incredibly low (which is a fucking crime because my list of edit ideas is sooo long) #i usually rely on ofmd and all of you amazing people to make me feel better if shit hits the fan #but i can barely see out of my left eye (maybe i should get an eye patch. do you think this will bring me closer to the gay pirates absjsb) #and i'm just so tired #okay whatever rant over #delete later

[spineless-lobster]

I need the kind of clueless whimsical confidence that hypnos has. My boy goes up to megaera, first of the furies, renowned torturer of oath-breakers and says “well have you tried dodging attacks? :D”

#like he asks his brother to kill everyone so he can spend more time with him #he confidently explains how his useless lists work #I need more of that ‘I am doing whatever I want and I don’t care what you think because I am having fun’ energy in my life #I love him he’s so cute #hades game #hypnos hades

[windydrawallday]

Long-PSA-short of sorts that's more a vent: I was always aware my behavior and way of expressing myself online can surprise many people, especially if they are not used to someone who uses the writing medium as a playful form to tell emotions in a very descriptive way as I do. I'm quite affectionate with words, yes. And I always beg people I hang with personally to let me know if some of that bothers them, curtly of course. So far there have been few instances of individuals confusing those signals with ulterior means, things I assure you there's nothing more than me being friendly and supportive.

Imagine idk an excited dog seeing its owner haha

Until the past week, I found myself being tackled by something that made me almost knock everything aside because it made me realize that probably I'm a walking trigger/squick inducer with even the way I wield words like "love" and "friendship".

Almost...

I'm pretty tolerant of whatever way people conduct themselves in this life, the only moment I flinch is when an individual assumes from my default behavior and presentation that I want to impose my way of life... And nopes.

This is simply how and who I am. Nothing more, nothing less. I don't search for conflict but for understanding. My language for expressing marvel and reflections is like this, never to make the other feel awkward or attacked.

So, it upset me knowing that by wielding this forever welcoming and lovable disposition, I can be something to fear and even despite... to some people.

But, you know? That means that my "love" and "friendship" lifestyle are not made for you, no reason to come back to me and point at it. Just keep walking if you have only rage and rejection to give as a reply to my point of view. Because by wielding rage and rejection, what you only do is burn bridges. To create conflict and assume imaginary antagonistic scenarios where there's nothing of that at all.

You can't create the world you wish to live in by burning bridges.

It took me a lot too to forge who I am right now. I even keep learning and chiseling through traumas and mistakes—kindness and patience taught me more than rage and rejection. And "love" and "friendship" are the bricks I chose to build those bridges. I know everyone else uses different concepts but in the end, we all build bridges. By creating bridges and inviting others to do the same, I expand not only my world, but the other's too!

Isn't that better than demanding to be this or that through a black/white flag of rage and rejection? I think so. And I understand perfectly we sometimes need to be blunt when marking our boundaries. Still, never justifies treating the other bad.

And if some of you find "fake" or distasteful the way I wear this flag of "love" and "friendship" I'm sorry: this place will never be safe for you then. The exit door is always open. Go ahead.

I hope you find your place and flags out there too, but don't forget that to do that you need to build bridges. If you don't want to call it "friendship" call it "glue" or whatever makes you comfortable, but don't kick people like me who fought with claws and teeth to reclaim those words and feelings.

Fight your fight by being a good example, not a bad experience that makes someone never want to deal with something like this again in their life.

"Any color you like, (in the end) they're all blue."

#windy squeals #im so sorry if i end upsetting someone with my point of view #with my expressive way to use words #or my overly dramatic behavior #its all real i swear these are all real #and you dont need to give me back the same level of energy #just be clear af and say what you need because i dont read minds #im tired of being seeing as a clown or be infantilized because of this #or feared like im a sort of vampire that sucks emotions because NO #or that im intolerant to people that dont follow those -normatives because believe me #im too very asocial to certain cues but intead of raging about them #i try to create new rules that fit better my way to navigate life #the only way to achieve what we want is by stating it gently #not setting on fire posibilities to create new connections and points of view #but i guess there will be always be people that prefer to live in a bubble and expect the whole diverse world to mold to them #and i say that as an aroace that used to be intolerant of the normatives that push my boundaries to the edge #but eh sometimes youll fight but most of the times youll need to dodge and learn to avoid bullets #listen if i sound ableist with this whatever i am then #im not perfect #gotta keep reading and relearning and updating my brain ugh

[princessdarth-vader]

cant stop thinking abt the ratgrinders' like... parents after this ep. trying not to be disappointed at the kill all enemies approach to this combat. i understand we have a different experience of the campaign to the pcs. but what i hope for is brennan taking a moment to focus on the families and loved ones of these kids who were manipulated and forced and used for porter's means. Who had their free will taken away from them, and their anger used against them.

Like, after all is said and done, we see a gnome couple; maybe they were sort of friends with the Thistlesprings, since Ruben's whole deal before being emo was like, that vibe. Maybe they knew their son had changed, was angrier and more sad, but they gave him the space to respect it. And Wilma and Digby see themselves reflected in the Hopclap parents' faces as they mourn their son, who they never got to properly say goodbye to. They didn't even realise how far gone he was.

If Sklonda, seeing the grieving parents of another sharp and ambitious rogue, determined to be the best, desperate to prove herself, realises that that could've been her. Wondering what she would do if it were Riz who had his own rage used against him, and ultimately dooming him to be the villain of the story.

Do the church mourn Buddy, who was let down by every adult in his life? Who learned to follow and obey before he learned free will. Will they even care, since he turned his back on them, when faced with the choice of oblivion or rage? Or will his parents quietly swallow their grief, and privately hope that, maybe, he got a second chance to find Helio again.

Imagine losing your kid to rage. It becomes hard to talk to them, to forgive them, because of that rage, but you don't understand it. You try and try to get through to them, but all your conversations end in fighting. You resent them, because you don't know what you did wrong. And then, before you can understand, and before you can apologise, before you can tell your kid you love them one more time, they're dead. They died at school, because of teachers they were supposed to be able to trust. And you learn that the rage wasn't natural, that they were used. It's not fair.

#fhjy #fhjy spoilers #ratgrinders #I don't know enough about the others to continue this energy #but like. ivy's parents wouldve planned to have a long long time with her #oisins parents are already dealing with one death in the family today #and get the news that their son died. was killed actually. because he was manipulated and used by a teacher #mary ann just. seemed so mild mannered #like the way all these kids had their personalities changed in a big way and probably fought with their parents or left or whatever #and thats like. look that happens in real life too

[snivel1]

Throws this into your face

#woe! half-assed sketches be upon ye #twisted wonderland #twst #twst fanart #twst mc #twst ramshackle #twst grim #twst lucius #twst malleus #(he's just standing there... menacingly) #(he wanted to dance too) #snively doodles #twst yuu #snively ocs #i dont really have the energy to do a more impressive job on my drawings lately #work sucking my life out of me #but this was a silly little thing so whatever <3