#now that's a headline

[theeminentlyimpractical]

#the best-laid schemes o' mice an' men-shaped-beings gang aft a-gley #thehardtimes headlines #aziraphaaaaaale #he commits war crimes (affectionate) #good omens #in my shitposting era now i guess #aziraphale

[theabigailthorn]

I'M MAKING A MOVIE

My next big creative project just got greenlit!

Last year we made The Prince, and it was a gamechanger - next year I'm making a sexy horror comedy vampire movie!

Can't wait to get started on this one lol. Also thank you?! This happened because people went so gaga for The Prince. It's phenomenal.

#Dracula's Ex-Girlfriend #The Prince #Philosophy Tube #Also can we talk about the fact that my debut film got announced IN VARIETY? #Like... WHAT?! #Variety Magazine! #You're gonna have to learn to talk that Variety speak #ba ba do ba ba ba do ba! #Thank you #I'm feeling very grateful right now #Also something very funny - my Dad misunderstood the headline and thinks the film is called Euphoria #My dad thinks I made Euphoria

[irenespring]

House MD Onion Headlines

I made a part 2 finally! (Part 1 is here, a couple extras are here, part three [new!] is here)

#house md #hatecrimes md #hilson #house md onion headlines #the onion #onion headlines #gregory house #james wilson #I may have writer's block right now but these I can do!

[thecreelhouse]

this is so fucking funny like “steve harrington has GOT to STOP being a MANWHORE”

#THAT is your main concern right now?????? #we’re all worried he’s gonna die and y’all are posting headlines like this fusbdjsbfjsbthdbg #steve harrington #syl shut up

[violent138]

I still think the funniest thing that could happen in The Batman 2 is Bruce fully committing to a sudden, incredibly convincing playboy persona that Gothamites either take as a sign of a brain tumour or evidence that Bruce Wayne's been swapped with a clone.

#Matt Reeves you've delayed it yet again now is the time to make these changes #the batman #battinson #batposting #bruce wayne #Headline: Bruce Wayne Lizard person?

[thesherrinfordfacility]

#good omens #good omens season 2 #lmao too late ive done it now #damnit i should have just done a part 6 sigh #ah well have this one on me #gomens shitpost #edit: swapped out for a better quality photo the last one was ass sorry hope you dont mind #the devil works hard but me with an onion headline works harder #onion headlines

[phoebonica]

#dhmis #don't hug me i'm scared #dhmis yellow guy #dhmis briefcase #dhmis roy #(implied) #might do more of these later but i saw this headline and couldn't resist #headline from the reductress #edit: realised I forgot to add alt text #it's there now

[persianflaw]

mash x the onion headlines (1/?)

#mash #m*a*s*h #hawkeye pierce #trapper john mcintyre #margaret houlihan #frank burns #henry blake #father mulcahy #mash x the onion #m* #i'm sure i'm not the only one to do this but i really hope i haven't unintentionally replicated any existing edits lol #be ready for uh. more of this #i spent an unreasonable amount of my morning grabbing headlines to use and now i've got a big ol backlog of em

[julieverne]

Sasha really went ahead and said this in 2010 <2010 is in CAPS> and then served 7 season of whatever Rizzoli & Isles was.

#sasha alexander #house md #gay #lgbtqia+ #lgbt #queerbaiting #the queerbaiting queen on season 6 of the queerbaiting show #she then went on to headline the queerbaitingest show of the next decade #rizzoli and isles #my beloved #queer #also she touches her mouth a lot which is nice #a little treat #i was gay in 2010 #and people cared A LOT #still gay now #people still care A LOT #i love all the new gay rep #but sometimes i miss the subtleties of Xena and subtext and URST

[ninjathrowingstork]

This is how the scene went, right?

#renfield #renfield 2023 #renfield movie #this is like the fourth version I made with three pictures and two headlines #but he deserves all the rest now

[zourried]

Just… read it again.

#now this is a headline that I can stand #my policeman #harry styles #this headline will haunt me forever

[katebihshop]

there is a world of difference between "this person was fired for supporting palestine" and "this person was fired for being a raging antisemite" and you do in fact need to actually look at what that person said to determine which it is. it sets a dangerous precedent to consider any support of palestine inherently antisemitic but it is just as dangerous to excuse antisemitism under the guise of supporting palestine.

#text #this isn't even just about celebrities either like there was some post going around a while ago that was outraged about some doctor #which literally included a screenshot of his post where he praised hamas for october 7th? #and tbh if you are both a) cruel enough to celebrate a terrorist attack and b) stupid enough to post that under your real name and face #then yeah! fuck around and find out #you can't just read a headline and assume the comments that got them fired were blown out of proportion by the (((media))) #but you also can't assume that they must have been fired for literally agreeing with hitler either #you need to read what they actually said and determine for yourself whether it was warranted or not #also related to the online outrage around the celebrities signing that letter about wanting hamas to release the hostages #calling everyone who signed it a genocide supporter for. literally wanting hostages released. #and wanting israelis and palestinians to be free to live in peace. anyone who signed that letter is now an evil genocidal zionist apparentl #because people didn't read the letter themselves and just assumed that must be true! #i/p #antisemitism

[larrylimericks]

14Aug23

Ten years! The betrothed, we wish well. From the record, someone’s been expelled. Not the swinger of purse — No, in fact, the reverse: It’s Louis who’s now been Danielled.

#larry #louis #louis tomlinson #stunts #danielle campbell #douis #colin woodell #danielle got engaged #the article headline originally said they'd been together 10 years #which would wipe louis from the narrative #it's since been edited (after larries did what we do) #and now reads 'after meeting nearly a decade ago' #it's sloppy fluffy non-journalism #held to no standards of fact-checking nor accuracy #but it's still funny as hell #and a good reminder that nothing is real #the real news is how adorable/gorgeous louis looked at lucky's first birthday party #so happy he's able to spend time with family #limerick-lt #august 14 #2023

[fcb-mv33]

Genuinely I feel like some people forget that in his rookie year Max has beaten the Red Bull cars in races that season, held up the world champions in some races, had great qualis and also finished p4 in tough conditions. His overtakes were amazing and he was beating his teammate at aged 17.

I don’t understand why people want to basically erase his rookie season cause it was amazing 

#yea he has an amazing car now #but Max was making headlines without a constantly fast car 💅 #rambles #max verstappen #f1 #formula 1 #red bull racing

[serendipitouscontaminant]

Abbott Elementary + Onion Headlines, Part II

Part I

#abbott elementary #onion headlines #janine teagues #gregory eddie #mr. johnson #melissa schemmenti #barbara howard #jacob hill #the last one is from desking immediately post sweet baby jesus lmaio #i'm obsessed w doing these now and i'm making it everyone's problem #will there be more? we shall see (yes absolutely) #also gregory's was originally recently divorced man so i changed it a little #also #abbott elementary spoilers #jic

[thesherrinfordfacility]

Good Omens S2 + Onion Headlines (Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Aziraphale Special | Crowley Special )

+ bonus

#good omens #good omens season 2 #crowley #aziraphale #onion headlines #i knOW the last one hes looking at gabriel but STILL #the devil works hard but me with an onion headline works harder #gomens shitpost #now i just need a crowley photodump ahead of the release and the onions shall be COMPLETE