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anyroads · 2 years

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OK you know what, if we're gonna talk about Bake Off then fuck it, let's do this.

It used to be this wholesome, lovely show! We used to watch it for the bakers! And the learning! And the light banter and occasional bit of coy innuendo! What happened?

Channel 4 happened. When they bought the show they made a number of changes, most of them Not Good™️. Not just in the sense of them resulting in a lot of 😬 and 🫠 moments, but in the sense of how they changed the show's purpose, atmosphere, and brand.

Look, I know most people are just like, "whatever, it's just a baking show," and yeah, sure. But it's one of the UK's most successful TV exports, and where it once shifted the tone of reality competition to being wholesome and supportive of contestants, it's since moved towards creating tension at the contestants' cost. So aside from the fact that most people watching it signed up to watch a nice show, it has also shifted the goalposts of what that even means. And that, lovelies and gentlefolk, is some bullshit.

I decided to break my rant analysis into four main parts: theme weeks, the hosts, the judges, and the bakers. Let's get to it!

Theme Weeks:

If you watch Bake Off, you know the show's always had a specific theme for each week. The staples that come up in most seasons are:

cake

biscuit

bread

pudding/dessert

pastry

patisserie

Less common but consistent are things like caramel and chocolate week.

Then there are the fun episodes! When GBBO was on the BBC, this started out with things tea week, tarts, pies, tray bakes, basically little tangents still focused on emphasizing specific baking skills. In Series 6 (still on the BBC) they had their first nation-focused theme week with French week -- fairly innocuous given that a lot of patisserie is French, France and England share much more culture than either cares to admit [Norman Flag dot gif], and it was a nice change from watching Paul make the bakers do recipes that involved boiling things while talking about how wonderful boiled doughs are (are they, Paul? Are they?).

The show kept mixing it up with innocuous themes like advanced dough and alternative ingredients weeks, European cakes, Victorian week, batter week, and botanical week. And while it was frustrating to watch Paul Hollywood mispronounce things like the Hungarian Dobos Torta and lecture bakers on babka when he clearly knew nothing about it (or about Jewish baking in general, go off Past Me), the show's general attitude was that the judges had their own opinions, which were separate from the immutable facts around the chemistry of baking (more on this later) and shouldn't affect how bakers are judged.

After the show moved to Channel 4, the number of themed weeks increased and more of them focused on specific countries. In 6 seasons on the BBC, there were only two country-focused theme weeks, and in 5 seasons on Channel 4 there have been five. And while they've also had themes like vegan baking, roaring 20s, the 1980s, spice week, etc. the show has really started to go hard on exoticizing other cultures in outright disrespectful and racist ways. There's been Italian and Danish week, German, Japanese (it wasn't, it was East Asian week), and now Mexican week (which doesn't touch on interspersed Jewish bakes that didn't get a theme week, like versions of bagels and babka set as technical challenges that were borderline hate crimes and mansplained by a guy who has no idea how to make either and once wrote in a cookbook that challah was traditionally eaten during Passover). Each time the hosts played up the theme with racist bits and jokes that can be used as evidence in court if your case is "why should shows with scripted content have a professional writing staff."

Which touches on other issues the show has now...

The Hosts:

When GBBO was on the BBC, the show was hosted by ✨Mel Giedroyc✨ and ✨Sue Perkins✨. They encouraged the bakers! They'd hold stuff for them sometimes! They were interested in them! If a baker had a breakdown, they would start singing copyrighted material to render the footage unusable! When the show moved to Channel 4, they left, though I'm not unconvinced that Channel 4 offered them impossible to accept contracts to force them out so they could rebrand the show. They replaced them with Sandy Toksvig and Noel Fielding. Sandy was a lovely host in the vein of Mel and Sue, and she and Noel had a relatively sweet rapport, but she left a few seasons ago and was replaced by Matt Lucas.

Noel Fielding is mostly known for his quirky brand of comedy, a sort of British Zooey Deschanel who's goth from the neck up, an upperclass British gay divorcee from the neck down, and basically an early 60s Beatle re: trousers. Matt Lucas has almost definitely never watched a single episode of GBBO and his most redeeming quality is his thinly veiled contempt for Paul Hollywood.

The two treat the baking tent as their personal playground. Far from the supportive attitude of Mel and Sue, they tend to get in the bakers' way during the most stressful moments, especially when they try to do hilarious "comedy" bits (I can't not put that in quotes) like Noel's talking wooden spoon thing, or Matt talking over Noel to do time calls. During theme weeks like Japanese and Mexican week, they do culture-specific bits that are both racist ("just Juan joke" and "is Mexico a real place?") and unsurprising, given that both Matt and Noel did blackface on their respective sketch shows and absolutely could and should have known better because it was already the current fucking century.

All this to say, there's now a separation between the bakers and the hosts, as if they're on different shows. The hosts are doing their own thing and the bakers are doing GBBO. The show has gotten meaner to the bakers, and the hosts aren't there to support them anymore, they're just there to be comic relief. Because when you refocus your show on stressing the bakers the fuck out, you need a forced laugh I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

The Judges:

First of all, a sincere congratulations to Paul Hollywood who managed to squeeze I jUsT cAmE bAcK fRoM mExIcO aNd YeT sTiLL pRoNoUnCe PiCo De GaLLo As 'PiKa De KaLLa' and I aM aN eXpErT oN s'MoReS wHiCh aRe MaDe WiTh DiGeStiVe BiScUiTs AcCoRdiNg tO mE, aN eXpErT oN s'MoReS, just two in a giant pile of astoundingly wrong hot takes, into a short enough time span that they all aired within Liz Truss's term as Prime Minister. A true man of accomplishments.

In the interest of fairness, I need to preface this with a disclaimer that, due to the fact that I've been watching Bake Off for most of its run, I'm biased. Specifically, I can't stand Paul Hollywood's smarmy, classist, egomaniac ass because he's proven time and again he's more interested in looking smart than actually knowing what he's talking about. Since the show moved to Channel 4, they've changed the occasional handshake Paul would give bakers to the HoLlYwOoD hAnDsHaKe™️. It's gone from being an emphasis of someone's skill to a goal, a reward, and one that emphasizes the judges' place above the bakers.

The judges used to function as teachers, imparting their skills and insights to the bakers. When the show was on the BBC, the voiceover leading to a judging would focus on the bakers' work being finished, saying how it will now be evaluated based on their skill and how well they met the brief. The voiceovers now, on Channel 4, focus on the judging (literally saying something along the lines of, "the bakers will now be judged by Prue and Paul"). There is a clear distinction Channel 4's producers have made, to mark that the show is now about whether or not the judges approve, not whether the brief was understood and executed well. On the BBC, it was irrelevant whether the judges liked a particular flavor, as long as the bake was well-made. Now, the bakers are expected to know the judges tastes and cater to them, which is frankly bullshit. A judge doesn't have to like a flavor to know whether or not it was executed well, ie. is it carrying a bake and was it meant to etc.

The judges have been turned into a brand. Cynically, Channel 4 knows that by building them up and focusing the show more on them, they can exploit their image more for profit. In the process, they've become much more biased and their own biases have come out as well. Most recently in the flaming dumpster fire that was Mexican Week, Paul Hollywood tried to intimidate a baker by telling them he had just gotten back from Mexico (which must have been a fruitful learning trip if he couldn't even learn how to pronounce pico de gallo correctly). Where do I even start with this? Here's an amateur baker from England (the show specifically casts middle and lower middle class bakers for the most part??) who likely can't afford trips to Mexico, who lives in a country with incredibly limited access to Mexican cuisine, who is expected not only to understand the cooking and baking traditions of a completely different culture but to do so well enough to play with it and do something creative with it. On top of which, one of the judges is now using his privilege of traveling halfway around the world as some kind of leverage, as if this were a bar that any amateur British baker could clear.

Prue, meanwhile, has openly asserted her biases against cultural flavors and textures, prioritizing her own personal preferences over them, as if they were in any way relevant to the skills and knowledge necessary to execute the tasks she sets to the bakers. She has also been consistently elitist, criticizing bakers for choices they made that were clearly informed by their experiences within income brackets that are too low and foreign for Prue to comprehend. She once had a go at a baker on a Christmas special because his Christmas dinner themed bake didn't have a turkey, even though it was clear from the stories he shared of his own Christmases that his family likely couldn't afford one. "It's not really Christmas dinner without a turkey," Prue said into the camera angrily while sitting on a chair made of live orphans and telling the ghost of Christmas Future to come back when he had another museum gift shop necklace for her to round out her collection.

The show is no longer about which baker has the best skills. It's become about which mortal can appease the gods of Mount Olympus, ie. the judges.

The Bakers:

Remember when the show was about them? Channel 4 doesn't! Because this is a reality competition show, the bakers are chosen both based on their skills, as well as cast-ability. They're cast as characters, distinct from each other, from different areas, age groups, ethnicities. All of them are amateurs. All of them are middle or lower middle class. They've ranged from college students to supermarket cashiers to prison wardens to scientists.

Something I noticed when the show moved to Channel 4 is that the baker who goes home in the first week is always wildly behind the rest in skills. I have no proof of this other than my eyeballs and deductive reasoning skills, but I think that Channel 4 deliberately casts a ringer each season who they think will be an easy send-off in the first week, just to get the audience's feet wet.

Anyway, like I said, this show used to be about the bakers - about them building skills and learning, and having walked into the tent with a self-taught foundation and understanding of the processes and chemical reactions involved in baking. When the show was on the BBC, the end of each round had some (often brief) moments of tension - will they finish in time? Will they get their bakes on the plate before time is up? Did they forget to add sugar to their batter and only remember at the last minute? In the end, they usually managed to finish and we'd all breathe a sigh of relief and think, yeah! You go, Bakers Who I'm Rooting For!

Now, on Channel 4, the end of round drama has been stretched to be so much longer that they've composed extra music for it. The bakers often seem out of their depth, whether because the instructions for the technical challenge are too vague (bake a lemon meringue pie??? As if anyone in the UK under the age of 60 has had one in the last decade???), or because they were expected to bake something that required a more than a basic foundation they weren't told of. Often it seems like they just aren't given enough time, a tactic used by reality competition shows to manipulate contestants into giving the cameras more dramatic content. On top of all this, the hosts get in their way, instead of helping them plate their bakes. As has been pointed out before, when everyone fails the challenge, the real failure lies with whoever set it.

In conclusion:

The show no longer exists to teach the bakers - and the audience - skills or knowledge. It now manipulates contestants for dramatic effect and prioritizes showing conflict over wholesome content. Channel 4 sees the bakers as social media content they can churn out season after season, and don't care about them because in a few months there'll be a new batch to exploit. Meanwhile, the judges are also out of their depth, co-opting recipes from other cultures and butchering them horrendously, while the camera gives them nothing but status as they hold bakers to the expectation that they learn how to make things very much the wrong way. If you saw any of the tweets about Mexican or Japanese week, or read my post on how Paul Hollywood isn't allowed to go near babka ever again, you'll understand.

So what would fix all this? Scrap the current judges and the hosts altogether. Bring back Mel and Sue, and replace the judges with expert bakers who have a love of their craft and want to share it with others. The draw of GBBO used to be its warmth and comfort - if Channel 4 isn't going to start its own version of Master Chef For Bakers, then it needs to stop trying to find a balance of how it can insert that vibe into GBBO. It can't. That's not a thing. Stop trying.

#GBBO #paul hollywood #prue leith #the great british bake off

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totowlff · 3 months

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chapter 15 — family that i chose

➝ cassie discovers that pregnancy cravings suck

➝ word count: 2,6k

➝ warnings: none

➝ author’s note: if i wanna cry? yeah.

16 WEEKS The backbone and tiny muscles in your baby's back are gaining strength, so she can straighten out that head and neck even more. Thanks to those developing facial muscles, your baby is capable of making a few expressive frowns and squints, even at this early stage.

Cassie felt pathetic sitting inside of her car, nose red and eyes filling with tears, especially over something that would feel trivial a few months ago.

It all started over the summer, during her trip to Austria for the Grand Prix. Toto took her to a cafe in Vienna near his flat that served this specific type of pastry - almost like a cinnamon roll, but with chocolate filling instead. He said it was called schokoschnecken in German, but it was originally a Hungarian pastry called kakaós csiga. It meant the same thing in both languages - “chocolate snails”. She had one, and it was delicious, but it wasn’t something that she considered a highlight.

Well, until that week. Toto had traveled to Hungary, after all, it was another normal race week and that meant little time to talk to each other. They were able to conduct quick calls and messages about how she and the baby were doing, but Cassie felt strange every time she got off the phone.

It was as if the lack of Toto’s physical presence began to feel bigger with each day he spent away from her. Cassie even suspected it might be something related to her hormones, which she blamed on most things these days, including the way she felt uncomfortably bloated, had unpleasant heartburn, and was on a constant emotional rollercoaster. Deep down, she knew all of this was coming, and that she shouldn’t feel bad about it, but thinking about it just made her want to cry more.

She tried to calm herself down with some breathing exercises, letting her head fall back and gaze up at the roof of her car, but she was interrupted by her phone ringing. She glanced at the screen and realized who was calling, and took a moment to try and compose herself, wiping her cheeks before she answered.

— Hello, Cassie? — she heard Toto say. It sounded like he was smiling — How are you?

— Hi, Toto, I'm fine — Cassie said, cringing at the nasal quality to her voice — And you?

— Everything's fine here too, I'm coming back — he began, stopping after she sniffled once again — Are you crying?

— No, not at all…

— Yes, you are crying, I can tell by your voice. What happened?

— It's just — Cassie said, in a low voice — Remember the photo you sent me on Wednesday?

— The one with my breakfast at that cafe?

— Yeah.

— What about it?

— It's just that there was a plate with those… pastries I had in Vienna — she stammered, feeling her lower lip tremble — The chocolate rolls. The… chocolate snails, or whatever they were in German.

Cassie's voice broke, and she started sobbing again.

— Oh, my angel…

— I thought there wouldn't be any around here, so I bought some chocolate croissants at Sainsbury’s, but they were horrible. Then, I went to Waitrose and they didn't have anything like that, just cinnamon rolls. After that, I went to Pret and they only had ones with white chocolate — she continued, while tears ran down her face — And now I'm in front of a Danish bakery that one of the girls in marketing recommended to me, with an empty box of cinnamon rolls and in tears because I can’t find anything like it.

— Probably because it’s a Hungarian pastry — Toto murmured on the other end of the line.

— I remembered that it was like a cinnamon roll, so I thought that would be close enough to make these cravings go away — Cassie replied — And I feel like an idiot because I ate all these pastries for nothing and they’re probably not good for me, and the doctor said I’m supposed to be eating well so I don’t gain too much weight aside from the baby, but nothing else even sounds good right now…

— Cassandra…

— I even tried making them at home, but I didn’t let the dough rest long enough and all of the butter leaked out of them and they were really greasy and chewy — she continued, sobs punctuating her words and making fat tears fall into the empty box in her lap.

— My angel, listen to me — Toto interrupted her, his soft voice loosening the knot in her chest — Firstly, you shouldn't worry about getting fat. You are growing an entire human being and you have every right to eat whatever you want. I want you to worry about being well and happy, not about numbers on a scale.

She sniffled, looking at her belly, bulging under the blouse she was wearing.

— Are you sure? I feel so ugly…

— You could never be ugly, my angel — Toto replied, making her smile — You’re so gorgeous that you’re going to be the prettiest mama at the playground, the other parents won’t be able to take their eyes off of you.

Cassie giggled.

— Please, I’m not that…

— We’ll see about that, when you make a man faint because he saw the most gorgeous woman in the world holding the prettiest baby on the playground.

— What about the women that won’t be able to take their eyes off of the tall, handsome man with the charming accent pushing a stroller?

— We'll see, Cassie — he laughed — Now I need to go, okay?

Suddenly, her joy went out, like a candle that had just been blown out. The prospect of Toto hanging up was terrifying. Why did he make her feel this way? Why did the idea of not being able to talk to him for a while feel like her heart was being ripped out of her chest? Toto wasn’t her boyfriend, he was her boss and her daughter’s co-parent.

— Okay — Cassie mumbled.

— Don’t worry, Cassie. I’ll be back tomorrow, and I’ll come and check on you after I get back — the team principal said, just before the line went silent. She sighed as she stared at the screen as it went black. Cassie just wanted it to be the next evening.

A day later, the sound of the intercom put an end to Cassie's agony.

Jumping up from the sofa, she tapped the button on her intercom and let Toto in. She hovered uncomfortably by the door, trying to settle herself so that Toto wouldn’t see the way she was waiting for him. Hearing footsteps coming up the stairs, she opened the door for him. The smile that appeared on Cassie's face when she saw Toto was completely involuntary, but it turned into surprise when she saw that Toto was holding a pink pastry box.

— Toto?

— Ah, good evening, Cassie — he said, smiling. When he got close to her, Toto bent down to plant a cordial kiss on her cheek — Are you okay?

— Yeah — she stammered, as Toto stepped into her apartment and removed his shoes — What is this?

— What is what?

— This — Cassie said, pointing to the box he had just placed on the table in her entryway.

Toto smiled.

— Ah, someone called me yesterday saying she wanted to eat Hungarian chocolate rolls — he explained, opening the box almost theatrically, revealing a dozen glossy pastries, smothered in icing. Staring at the contents of the box, Cassie felt an inexplicable wave of heat expand through her chest.

— You got these for me? — she stammered, looking up at Toto.

— Of course, you said you wanted them, so I brought them to you.

— But, how? You said you were going straight from the circuit to the airport…

— I asked the catering staff to pack a box and leave it in my office after the race — he replied, anxiety written all over his expression — Aren't you going to try it?

— Can I? — Cassie asked, shyly.

— Of course, they are yours.

Taking one of the pastries, she took a careful bite, closing her eyes and letting out a long sigh. It was crispy on the outside and soft on the inside, the chocolate combining perfectly with the buttery layers of dough. As she chewed, Cassie couldn't help but be impressed by the texture and softness of it, even though they were probably a day old at that point.

When she opened her eyes again, she met Toto's attentive gaze.

— Good? — he asked, expectation clear on his face.

She nodded, taking another bite while he smiled with satisfaction at having accomplished his mission. However, as she chewed, Cassie noticed that his smile seemed almost mischievous.

— What? — she asked, mouth full of pastry.

— You’ve got something on your face — Toto replied, seeming to hold back a laugh.

Finding a bit of chocolate icing on the corner of her lips, Cassie wiped it off with her thumb, bringing it to her mouth and licking it off. However, that made Toto shake his head before taking a step forward. Silently, he brought his hand to the tip of her nose and gently rubbed her skin with his thumb.

Looking up at him, Cassie found warmth in Toto's brown eyes. It was as if he was standing in front of something precious, looking at someone who was truly important to him. And the feeling of being that person for him, of being relevant to the point where he brought a box of pastries directly from Hungary to satisfy her stupid pregnancy cravings, made her eyes fill with tears.

— Cassie? Are you okay?

— Yeah — she sniffed, running her fingers over her cheek — I’m okay, just...

Placing his hand over hers, concern was evident in Toto's eyes.

— Isn't that what you wanted?

— No… I mean, yes, it's what I wanted, just — Cassie's voice trailed off — It's really good. Better than I imagined.

The team principal smiled, his thumb stroking the back of her hand.

— I'm glad you like it, Cassie — Toto said — I was really upset after hearing you crying on the phone.

— I'm sorry about that — she said, looking down at the half-eaten pastry in her hand.

— No, there's no reason to apologize, my angel. I’ve read about the cravings pregnant women get and, like I said, I'm here for both of you — he assured, placing his other hand on her belly — And if our Ingrid wants chocolate snails, she'll have them, no matter what. I insist on that.

Staring into his eyes, Cassie could hear her own pulse in her ears, as well as a strange sensation in her abdomen. It was a kind of spasm, very different from the butterflies she used to feel when she was with Toto. When the feeling suddenly stopped, she realized what had happened.

And her eyes filled with tears again, this time, with joy.

— Cassie? — Toto asked softly.

Placing his hand in the exact spot on her belly, it only took a few seconds for the spasm to repeat itself. Toto looked down at her abdomen, seeming to process what had just happened.

— You felt that?

Toto looked up with wide eyes.

—That was…

— It's her — Cassie smiled, feeling — She's moving.

An incredulous laugh escaped his lips.

— Mein kleines Mädchen — Toto murmured, staring at Cassie's belly again, as if he could see Ingrid's little face through her skin. Then, he knelt in front of her— Dir gefielen die Süßigkeiten so gut, dass du dich entschieden hast, vorbeizukommen?

Feeling some strange impulse, Cassie brought her hand to the top of Toto’s head without thinking about it, stroking her fingers through his hair.

— Was für ein verspieltes kleines Mädchen du bist, Ingrid. Ich kann es kaum erwarten, Sie hier bei uns zu haben und unsere Tage in pure Freude zu verwandeln — he continued. After a new flutter, the two looked at each other, the tears in their eyes speaking much more than any words.

A few seconds later, he stood up and wrapped Cassie in a tight hug, pressing her head against his chest. The silence in the apartment's dining room carried a tranquility that was impossible to describe, at least in her view. With her eyes closed, she enjoyed the warmth of Toto's arms and his calm breathing, interrupted by the occasional sniffle.

This was the peace she had sought all her life.

— Thank you — Cassie whispered. The word made Toto pull away slightly to look at her, brushing a strand of hair away from her face.

— For what? — he questioned.

— For the pastries.

— You know it was the least I could do for you, right? — Toto said, a mischievous smile on his lips — I'm here to support you in everything, it's my commitment to you and Ingrid.

— And that's why I'm thanking you. For being by my side from the beginning, when Ingrid was just a dream of mine — she said — I don't think I'll ever be able to thank you enough for getting into this with me, despite all of the hassle, the appointments -

Cassie's voice cracked. It still felt a little surreal that they had made it, that they were actually going to have a daughter together. But the slight flutter in her belly was proof enough that there was a little girl growing inside Cassie.

— And I would do it all again.

— Would you?

— Yes — Toto said, nodding — I would go through all the exams, all the conversations, all the stages of our legal agreement, all the bureaucratic procedures...

— Even the night we conceived her?

The silence that followed after Cassie's question was different from the one that had enveloped their embrace. Toto stared at her with an unreadable expression, as if he was thinking about what he would say to her.

— Well, yes — he replied, then added — Especially considering we wouldn't have Ingrid here if it weren't for what happened that night. Furthermore, if it hadn't happened, we would probably have had to continue with the insemination process and we would have run the risk of new failures, new frustrations...

Disappointment grew within Cassie as Toto continued babbling about how the process of continuing to try to have a baby artificially would probably have worn them both out. She knew that question had been risky, especially considering the particularly unknown territory they were exploring together.

However, there was a part of Cassie that wished Toto had responded that she would get through this because he liked her and wanted to take the next step, but those hopes were being dashed as he talked.

“How am I going to be happy like this, Toto?”, she thought, while he kissed her forehead again.

— Now I need to go, I have some things to organize at home and some emails to answer — he said, taking a step back.

— Are you sure? — Cassie stammered — I can make us something to eat, or we could order something...

— I don't want to keep you any more busy than necessary, and besides, you need to rest. You’re at the office tomorrow, right?

— Yes, I am — she murmured, almost disinterested — Getting things ready for the summer shutdown.

— Do you have any plans? — Toto asked, his hand still resting on the side of her belly.

— Well, I'm thinking about going to see my aunt in Chichester...

— Ah, Simone, right? — he smiled, confident that he had gotten it right.

— It's Sybil, Toto — Cassie laughed — And yes, that’s the one. She’s the only family I really talk to, aside from my sister. I don't even know where Aunt Penelope lives and you know that my father's family was never very affectionate with me, so it doesn't make sense to talk to them.

Toto’s gaze softened.

— They have no idea what they're missing.

— A real nuisance, my grandfather Albert would say.

— An extraordinary woman — he corrected her, before approaching and placing a kiss on her forehead again, accompanied by a hug — I’ll see you tomorrow?

— As always — Cassie replied, forcing a smile.

— Perfect — Toto said, before bending down slightly — Wir sehen uns auch morgen, okay? Ich liebe dich, mein kleines Mädchen.

Cassie walked him out of the apartment, and he hugged her again. As she closed the door, she spent a few seconds in silence, his warmth still present in the places where he had touched her body so tenderly. Placing her hands on her own belly, she tried to replicate the way he caressed her, feeling the first movements of their daughter, the child who would bond them forever.

The constant reminder that she was too difficult to love.

#toto wolff #formula 1 fic #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #wlffog #etlwlff #toto wolff x oc #formula 1 x oc #formula one x oc #f1 x oc #formula one fic #toto wolff fanfic #formula one fanfic

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tintinology · 11 months

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What is Tintin’s favourite music record?

In Tintin and the Picaros, Tintin tells the Captain to be quiet and insists on playing a record that "he simply adores" to drown out their conversation while he reveals that the villa they’re staying at is bugged:

What record does he play? In the comic, it’s clearly Bianca Castafiore’s famous Jewel Song:

But what of the adaptations based on the comics? Tintin and the Picaros only has four adaptations: three radio plays (in German, Danish and Swedish), and the 1991 Nelvana TV show.

The TV show is the most similar to the comics, in that it also uses a record of Bianca Castafiore singing to drown out the sound of their conversation.

The German radio play (1984-1987), has Tintin play a rock song:

In the Swedish one (1970s-1980s), he puts on a mambo record (had to add as video because the audio file didn't work, sorry!):

The Danish one (1972-1983), despite being hard to hear, has him put on Dancing Queen by ABBA:

It’s clear the TV show was concerned with being accurate (and maybe didn’t want to choose a song that would age poorly or that people wouldn’t associate with Tintin), while both the German and Danish radio plays went for something that was popular at the time. The Swedish one is probably the most realistic of them all, because they would probably be more likely to find local music among the records at the villa.

Are any of these actually songs that Tintin likes? One can assume that he’s just putting on whatever is at hand, but it is interesting to see what each adaptation thought would be a likely choice for him to find in the villa he and his friends are prisoners in.

#tintins an abba fan confirmed #tintin #captain haddock #the adventures of tintin #tintin and the picaros #radio play #tv show #comic

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ukulelegodparent · 4 months

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hey i just wanted to send an ask as someone who has been like really struggling with this for a while. it was your tag on post about white south africans that went something like people acting like having ancestors in europe gives them some magical tie to that place. i see a lot of posts telling people like me to reclaim their european roots rather than appropriate stuff that doesn't belong to me. is that really the answer? i just feel like i don't l have another option. seeing people with cultural ties that they can draw pride, inspiration, wisdom from and then looking at my own lack of any of that just kind of opened like a deep pit of dread in me as i thought about it more and more. idk even know if you have the answers necessarily its just been eating away at me and that tag kinda just kinda made me really wanna ask on the off chance you had any sort of answer.

Hey, I mean I'm no expert on the topic and can only really speak from my own experience which is mostly as a European interacting with Americans. This won't necessarily match your situation, but I just know more about the situation in the US bc of well. The everything of it.

I mean embrace your roots all you want and look at the culture of your ancestors and keep what you want and leave the rest. It's yours. But let's take someone who is German-American. Their ancestors came there in the mid 19th century and that is their latest direct cultural tie to Germany. Or German lands or whatever. It's the middle of the 19th century. It's complicated. Point is those ancestors left a society where their specific culture (whatever region they were living in) was the majority and went into a culture where it was the minority. So either they assimilate or they form a smaller community with other Germans. Either way at that point they are cut off from the main bulk of what they consider their culture. They themselves will have strong cultural influences from the culture that surrounds them and even without that the culture on it's own will slowly warp and change. So too will their language. Maybe they stop speaking German in the first generation, maybe during one of the world wars, maybe there are still parts of the adult population of that community that speak a form of German. What that German-American person would consider the traditions and culture that were passed down to them from the German side of the family might have very little to do with anything that was part of the culture of those initial immigrants to the US. Now while all that was happening German culture in Germany also changed a lot. Between Unification, a world war, the establishment of a democratic system, the absolute turmoil of the 20s, female emancipation, fascism, another world war, a refugee crisis, another dictatorship, a lot of immigration from Turkey and Italy, the establishment of the EU, reunification etc etc. German culture in Germany is also drastically different from what it was in the mid 19th century when those ancestors left.

So that is the one slightly odd thing that like. People talk about their what they consider their own culture and they call it eg "German" or "Polish" or whatever, but the culture they have has just been through a lot of washes. Which is fine, but it is a bit silly when people post pictures of two old women on a cemetery and they want to call them 'sweet ladies' but end up calling them 'old hags'. But also by calling it like a culture that has a whole country attached to it it's a bit like they're declaring themselves experts which. I mean it leads to miscommunication is all I'm saying. And also there's the point that ethnicity just doesn't work like that in Europe. It's just not carried down that far through the family. I might have had Polish or Dutch or Danish ancestors in the early 19th century but I literally would never know. So it's odd to us here for people to build their identity around something that lies so far in their past. Again. This is the part that is just a little odd, will get people made fun of etc. Maybe a little annoying at times but whatever. 'you have yours over there and we have ours over here' is the name of the game.

The frustrating thing is when people with this history act like they have any sort authority on these things. And especially the frequent (Especially American) 'Bull in a China shop' moments you get where people then base their entire personality around stereotypes and come here and act like they belong. And just. There is sometimes this deep unawareness with especially Americans that they are foreigners here. Of course with Americans the cultural imperialism plays into the frustration here but I see it even with my cousin who grew up in Aotearoa and who also just. I mean both of her parents are German, a lot of their friends are and they've visited almost every year she's been alive and yet, when she says she wants to study here all I can think is 'Girl you will have the biggest culture shock of your life' and her parents literally barely have Kiwi citizenship.

And it might also be from the European side an attempt to remove oneself from colonialism, though I don't think that's the case. There is a huge cultural divide, especially between continental Europe and the Anglosphere. But mostly I mean culture is a living breathing thing that people have to actively participate in to be a part of it. And wherever in Europe your roots may lie, by nature of living on the other side of the world you cannot participate in those traditions and you will be part of a different culture. Like my culture to me is Easter Fires just as much as getting a Döner after a long night out and getting fresh bread rolls from a bakery on a Sunday morning and not being able to go shopping on a Sunday and terrible terrible Apres-Ski music (that I must admit I indulge in sometimes) and the stellar parody dubs of 2010 German Youtube and hearing church bells, and the architecture and the language omg the language, the beautiful poems, having to suffer through Faust in school, the supermarkets, the way towns work here, the way winter smells, the way my grandfather talks and the way my great-grand aunt talks, the forests, the mountains, the fields, not going to the Oktoberfest, not because I don't have the means to but because growing up I was taught to despise it and all things Munich with it, good Brezen, amazing lentil stew (from the can of course), the list goes on and on and on. And some of these are really specific to me and some are more general. And like if you want to connect with your roots, I'm genuinely happy for you, have fun! But for our hypothetical German American, whatever sits at the heart of German and European culture (bread and a certain grumpiness seem to be a big component of both) it will probably never be truly hers. Even if she were to move here. And that's fine. I mean. Idk which post you saw bc there actually were two where I left comments like that in the tags, but one of them listed a lot of examples of what culture can be and of why the 'haha white people have no culture' thing is inaccurate. Maybe it's just that it's hard to see sometimes when your culture is so squarely the majority you never ever have to think about it. Idk. I look around me and even between the regions I've lived in there are such stark cultural differences. Culture can be the songs you sing for children to fall asleep, what the most prominent mode of transport is, where you go to eat, what you eat, what you cook, whether you cook at all, whether you go to church, whether there are crosses hanging everywhere despite rarely anyone ever going to church, what you wear, especially outside of traditional clothing. Maybe at the core of this discomfort I expressed in those tags is also the big question of 'why are you looking here for guidance? You are so different.'

#this is chaotic but I hope it was at least a little helpful?#it's also very long #feel free to add to it or whatever #I will go get groceries now #ask #anon

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catchyhuh · 5 months

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Well part 6 made it obvious that besides French and Japanese Lupin can talk at least in English, Italian, Russian, Spanish, German, Turkish, Korean and Dutch (gosh, he's good, I'm jelly).

What languages do the others know? I have some headcanons about Goe, but I'm curious about your ones!

well, the short of it, for all of em really, is: “do i need to learn this language to continue living for the next month? yes? ok let’s learn some conjugation.” so it’s less about which specific languages and just HOW many they know so much as how do they go about the process of learning/how do they USE the language once they’ve learned it so. IT’S A LOT

and uh also they all tend to default to japanese but you probably knew that LET’S GET INTO THE LOT

jigen:

jigen knows the least out of all of them, mostly because he. does not talk to many people. he’s an unintentional perfectionist about it in just that one sense; if he’s communicating, he wants to be SURE he’s understood, no room for misunderstanding

of course, that doesn’t mean he’s a slouch. i’m sure he can still speak, listen to, read AND write at least ten more languages than you and i can, minimum. BUT STILL, he just doesn’t want any room for misinterpretation, none whatsoever. so usually, he lets someone else do the talking, or he attempts to get by with whatever he and the other party can understand. it’s kind of funny because his stubbornness with this means a lot of times the gang will purposefully leave him to flounder, because THAT’S WHAT HE GETS FOR NOT WANTING TO REMEMBER SOMETHING AS SIMPLE AS “no ice in my drink please”

because of this, he’s most proficient in READING in other languages. there’s no need for input on his end, and he can get a hang of sentence structure AND the words themselves, so there’s no embarrassment later. so particular about these things

fujiko:

the only one who can speak a language better than she can understand it being spoken to her. like jigen, she mostly learns by just reading it, (sometimes by rereading a book she already knows, so she already has an easy guide to go off of) so trying to decipher someone TALK talking at a conversational speed is. a different beast

uses the whole multilingual thing as more of a novelty than a necessity. like it’s a party trick to her. like she's a translation dictionary in the flesh! ask her how to say purple in danish! wanna know the word for cookie in malay? if you want to know how to say “penis” in 30 languages, fujiko will frown and go “c’mon. grow up." ...but she'll still answer since it’s actually still just ‘penis’ in like five different languages anyway,

this is mostly because she weaponizes the “you don’t think i can understand x language, but yes, i can, and i can hear you calling me stupid while i’m standing right fucking next to you. you will regret this in time”

goemon:

absorbs foreign languages the fastest, which is hilarious because he’s always the most stubborn about wanting to just speak his first language. i mean it’s goemon, you probably saw this coming!

has since softened on the concept, not because of a “loosening of his personal principles,” but rather, he saw how damn DIFFICULT it made things for the average person he interacts with for two seconds of his life. it was initially easy to hold onto it, until he saw the poor waitress grin apologetically and say she was so sorry she didn’t understand. then he softened. a BIT. if you know even a smidge of japanese he’s expecting it from you.

wore a t-shirt that said COOL GUY in big, obnoxiously american letters once for a disguise. burnt it when the operation was over. lupin has five pictures of it. goemon allows the records to exist because he is, objectively, a COOL GUY

zenigata:

the funny thing is you’d ask him about it and he’d get kind of sheepish. like, yeah, he knows (he pauses to count on his fingers for a second) 23 languages but he’s not REALLY good at most of them it’s just like a thing for WORK it’s not like he’s REALLY got them down--

again, it’s the fault of that freakish hypercompetence that comes up for rule of funny. if he’s just getting off the plane and he realizes he’s left his gloves at home and is desperately trying to find a pair, no, he can’t get through in the slightest. but if it’s LUPIN involved, oh buddy if there is an ELEMENT of DANGER AND/OR LUPIN, he just breaks out entire sentences with almost perfect pronunciation and everything, to the point the other people in the room wonder if he was faking his issues earlier. and the answer is no, he wasn’t, he just didn’t have the proper motivation. NOW he does, and NOW he can speak fucking perfect indonesian, just because!

also kind of sort of treats it as a party trick the way lupin and fujiko do if he’s in a good enough mood (but you actually do get hints of that in the show, like that one little part 3 bit!) so that’s fun

#these people are insane. need to do a scientific study of how their brains work for real #lupin iii #lupin the third #jigen #fujiko #goemon #zenigata #asks

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anarchotolkienist · 7 months

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Jesus Christ, what people(s) first arrived in Scandinavia after the melting of the ice has absolutely no relevance to the colonisation of the Sámi. Who cares that, yes, technically Germanic-speaking groups probably arrived in (southern) Scandinavia before the Finno-Ugric ancestors of the Sámi. It's not a matter about blood relation to the actual literal first humans that arrived in some arbitrarily delineated physical space, it's about your concrete relationship to settler-colonialism - as settler or settled, something which is determined through actually existing legal, social and political structures. This is the kind of shit analysis you get as a result of the emphasis of noble savage wooery about being 'one with the land' and whatever being emphasised in left-wing spaces over any concrete material understanding of colonialism and the economic meaning of colonialism - the Sámi are an indigenous people because the Swedish and Danish empires decided to uproot their lifeways and force them away from their traditional lands to seize it in order to make use of the mineral and forest wealth there. Whatever happened between groups of people that no-one save the most crazed 19th century nationalist would describe as "Swedes" and the Sámi some four thousand years ago has zero relevance for this discussion.

#had a very frustrating discussion with a comrade in my affinity group #this is an outrageously stupid and silly way of understanding colonislism and indigeneity #turned off reblogs #like those stupid cunts who describe themselves as 'picts' in order to be angry at Gaelic #the fact that yes this area at one point had a pictish speaking majority before their total assimilation onto Gaeldom has literally #zero relevance to modern politics economics and life #whereas the colonisation of the Gaels is something that is actively ongoing and has very real and deeply traumatic affects #on people who exist NOW

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dedalvs · 1 year

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What's the language (con or nat) that frustrates you the most? I can't seem to shake my disdain for French

German der/die/das drives me nuts, but I can't help but love that language! I feel like I'm randomly throwing -e, -er, -en, -n, and -es onto adjectives, but it's so much fun. I'm like that kid playing the PVP version of Splatoon 2 who's just like, "I'M SQUIRTING PAAAAAAAINT!" while everyone else is trying to win, and somehow, randomly, I every so often end up covering a really big space and taking out two enemy combatants, and my teammates look at me and are all like, "Does he actually know how to play this...?", but then I come out with something like, "Und jetzt werden wir in dem Park einen Pferdreit nehmen!" and they're all like, "Nah..."

The only language I can't seem to pronounce is Dutch and its unfathomably opaque diphthongs. It's like you ask, "What color is this?"

COLOR

And they're all like, "Blurplet".

...

"Purple?"

"Ha, ha! Close to that, but it's more Vioblur."

...

"Violet...?"

"HA, HA, HA, HA!!! Oh my god, that's so cute! No, this is violet!"

COLOR

...

"Uhhhhhhhh...isn't that the exact same color...?"

And they're immediately:

I've never met a language where the vowels were so definitive and opaque. At least with Danish you can just take whatever you're saying and say it at x10 speed and they're all like, "Wow, you speak so slowly and clearly! It's so quaint!"

But, yeah... I love all the languages. I want to learn them all. What a joy that would be, to have time to learn them all... To take classes in every language... Oh, how I'd love that!

Anyway, thanks for the ask!

#language #dutch #danish #german #german language #dutch language #danish language

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sumerianlanguage · 10 months

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Hey! I’m no expert in languages.

Assuming you know (which is why I’m asking). What do we actually call the native (key word) Semitic language of Assyrian people today?

I’ve heard it referred to by many names. Syriac, Neo-Aramaic, Assyrian, Assyrian Aramaic, Suryoyo, Turoyo, Surayt, Suret and many others.

Its all very confusing to me. Especially since I’m looking to learn the common native tongue spoken by Assyrians today (whether it’s called Syriac or whatever).

Do you know?

Sorry if this is a waste of time btw.

Hello! This may not be the answer you're looking for, but it's... all of the above.

There are two major modern languages descended from classical Aramaic, similar to how French and Spanish are descended from Latin. (Aramaic is the language that supplanted Akkadian in Mesopotamia, similar to how Akkadian supplanted Sumerian.) In the languages themselves, they are Suret and Turoyo. Suret, also called Assyrian (not to be confused with the Akkadian-speaking Assyrian Empire), Neo-Aramaic or Chaldean, is spoken in Iraq, Syria and neighboring countries. Turoyo is also called Surayt and is spoken predominantly in Syria and Turkey. Both languages also have a growing diaspora as many speakers have fled the region since the 2003 Iraq war and Syrian civil war. In addition, there are several smaller languages and dialects in the same grouping.

How we name a language is always a complicated question, and depends who's asking. If the goal is to match how the speakers themselves refer to their language, I believe (based on my reading - please correct me!) "Suret & Turoyo" is the best option, but this won't get you far in linguistics research or when looking for resources. Most languages have any of several ways to refer to them - think of how in English, German is called "German", but in German, it's "Deutsch" (not to mention "Tysk" in Danish, "Allemand" in French, etc!) And for languages with a layered and complicated history, like those of the Near and Middle East, these names can multiply manyfold.

I'm not familiar with these languages personally, so if anyone has more knowledge of these languages or how best to search for resources on them, please reblog with them below. And best of luck with your language learning!

#replies #suret and turoyo #modern languages #linguistics #aramaic

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rosylunar · 2 years

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So this is just what i thought on what language the twst characters homeland are, but correct me if i'm wrong, and i apologize that my english are not good since english is not my primary language 😅

Rose Kingdom/Queendom of Roses

Since the one that lives here are Riddle, Ace, Deuce and Trey. Riddle are based on The Queen of Hearts/The Red Queen Iracebeth, ADeuce and Trey are based on the Card Soldiers (The Ace, The Deuce and The Trey), they're from Alice in Wonderland That's theme from Mediaeval England/Britain so I assumed the language that they use are British English, Scottish and Ireland 🤔. Imagine Riddle with a Dub that sounds exactly like Ciel Dub from Black Butler/Kuroshitsuji 🤭

Afterglow Savanna/Sunset Savanna

The ones that live here are Farena, Leona, Cheka and Rook, Farena Based on Mufasa, Leona based on Scar/Taka, Cheka Based on Simba, they're from The Lion King that's have African/Savanna vibe, so I assumed the languange that they use are Swahili or any other African languange. While in the other hand there's Rook who based on The Hunter from Snow White, and as we all know that Rook use French most of the time, which make me thinking maybe some part of Afterglow/Sunset Savanna use French Instead, like Coast Ivory/Côte d'Ivoire.

Coral Sea

Those who lives here are Azul, Jade and Floyd, Azul based on Ursula/The Sea Witch, Jade based on Jetsam, and Floyd based on Flotsam, they're from The Little Mermaid. From what I heard The Little Mermaid are based from Danish Folklore(correcg me if i'm wrong), so I assumed they use the Scandinavian Languages (since i'm not too sure the Little mermaid are from danish folklore, i choose to guessed around the Scandinavian Countries) 😅

Land of Hot Sands/Scalding Sands

Those who lives here are Kalim and Jamil, Kalim are based on The Sultan and Aladdin(i think), and Jamil are based on Jafar from Aladdin which is themed Arabian, so I assumed they're using Arabic or maybe even Indian as their language 🤔

Land of Pyroxene/Shaftlands

Those who lives here are Vil, Cater, Jack, Trein and Vargas. Vil's based on the Evil Queen from Snow White that's from Germany, Trein's based from Lady Tremaine from Cinderella that's from France, Vargas based on Gaston from Beauty and the Beast that's also from France, I headcanon Jack based on The Big Bad Wolf from Little Red Riding Hood which said to be first started in frech, Cater're same as those four from Kingdom of Roses, So I assumed that the Land of Pyronexe/Shaftlands language are French/German, but from what I remember from Vil's backstory in the game Young Jack Said that "you must be new around here" (is that what young jack said?🤔, i don't remember really), so i assumed that Vil's not originally from Land of Pyroxene/Shaftlands. 😅🤷‍♀️

Isle of Lamentation/Island of Woe

The one that lives here are the Shroud Brothers, Idia and Ortho. idia are based on Hades from Hercules, so I assumed the Isle of Lamentation/Island of Woe use Greek as their Language. Not to mention the building on the location that show in Eps 6 looks like those builing in Hercules/Ancient Greece.

Valley of Thorns/Briad Valley

The one that lives here are Malleus, Lilia, Silver and Sebek, Malleus based on Maleficent, Lilia based on the Bats that show when Maleficent using her magic(?) Or he based on those fairy aunties (Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather(?)), Silver are based on Aurora or Prince Phillips, Sebek based on the Gargoyle/Ogre(?)/whatever creatures that guarding the castle Maleficent Resides, they're from Sleeping Beauty that's from France, so I assumed their language are French.

Port Jubiles/ Port'O Blisz

Sam lives here, Sam are based on Dr.Facilier from Princess and the Frog that's from the US, so I assumed Port'O Bliss have English language with different accents of maybe just New Orleans Accent(listen i don't know what kind of accents that the US have, so since i'm not from US i apologize) 🤧

Harvest Village

Epel lives here, Epel based on The Poison Apple from Snow White, so I assumed Harvest Village language are Germany.

Sage's Island

This is where NRC and RSA located, I guessed their language are Japanese.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twst headcanons

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charlotte-of-wales · 5 months

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gotta start compiling my favorite royal moments of 2023 but I legit have the memory of a goldfish

the proper royal: coronation rania's 2nd wedding and also iman's carl gustav's 50th year on the throne-ball? party? gala? you know it christian's bday party leonor and elisabeth's oath of allegiance uk state visit to france and german, spain to denmark, uk to kenya, ned to south africa, Frozen but royal version: maxima and mathilde for netherland's state visit BABY CHARLES' ENGAGEMENTS that engagement in scotland where the trio hotties equerries sat behind w&k will's engagement where he was surrounded by kids and he said something along the line "you guys are the loudest kids i've ever known other than my kids" alexandra of lux wedding and other lesser known royal wedding beatrice for london's vogue event or whatever that was letizia and sofia attending women's world cup everything that happened in the tennis (wimbledon?) match, kate slaying, charlotte and george giving the rich sibling vibe, and also FELIPE felipe and letizia recreated (?) their first meeting, haakon kissed mette for her 50th birthday anne speaked german when she was opening an event in germany edo's insta post for his wedding anniv aww peak comedy: the spare complaining in text, audio, and tv series NEW YORK 2023: The Car Crash That Never Happen And War of Letter With TMZ reunion of the queen (letizia) and the one who will never be a queen (chantal) richard wearing a formal shoe and A CROC (he prolly hurt his foot but it's just so cute) princess michael being a judge for a cake competition but didn't want to taste them 😭 (was it this year?) walmart wallis and her husband had their job section empty because they are jobless lmao; their thank you letter to the bike company; chuck's escape sperm at beyonce's concert andrew's almost eviction saga EMERGENCY CAMILLAS that brf dinner where they had tiaras but none for coronation george didn't give a fuck and continue to eat pizza while will talked to sunak iirc well it's just happened: fred and miss casanova danish's titles removal (did it happen this year? well not sure) juan carlos' alleged secret daughter constantine's dead andrew in the car with w&k

thank u <333

#answered

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electrifiedpower · 1 month

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Introduction post:

Age: 33

Location: Somewhere in northern Germany

Zodiac sign: Virgo

Height: 191cm

Languages: German, English, Dutch (not perfectly fluent), Danish (very basic)

Enneagram: Type 8w7

Male, single, straight, dominant

I'm interested in many different things like psychology, travelling, cultures, languages, politics, history, cars, astrology etc.

Feel free to ask or text me whatever you want. You can talk to me about almost everything.

This Post will be updated soon

#me #get to know me

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lettheladylead · 1 year

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Abner, Fethry's brother?

Oooh excellent pick. Abner/Whitewater is a funny character because he (like Matilda) is a recognizable part of the Duck Family despite appearing in barely any comics, he's just lucky enough to be featured in Don Rosa's duck family tree.

Brief explanation of Whitewater Duck: he's a Barks creation that was only in a few pages of his intro comic. Then Rosa included Whitewater in his family tree and decided that his real name is actually Abner and he's Fethry's brother.

(There's a lesser known German duck author who suggested Whitewater and Fethry are brothers a few years before Rosa did, but idk if Rosa was referencing that or if they both came up with the concept separately lol I have no idea how much contact there really was between duck authors from different countries back then)

First thing to note about him: he existed before Fethry did! Whitewater Duck had nothing to do with Fethry and was just introduced as one of Donald's mysterious cousins (Donald actually refers to him as a "distant cousin" so he probably wasn't supposed to be a first cousin in Barks' mind but whatever whatever)

good funny dialogue

we as a society should bring back using "lick" instead of "defeat"

Whitewater's second appearance is in 2004 when he and Douglas McDuck are hanging out (Douglas refers to Whitewater as his nephew, which is once again a reminder than nephew/niece/aunt/uncle cannot be taken literally in duck comics, they're just community terms)

(for those who don't know, Douglas McDuck is a Danish creation and a cousin of Scrooge's, only in maybe 8 comics, if I remember correctly his whole deal is that he's a gold digger who could only ever find fool's gold so he's got a bad attitude and really bad luck)

(Whitewater just walked into this saloon and started arm wrestling random guys)

this image of donald putting on boots is strangely cute

Whitewater has a fun personality I feel like people usually portray him as always grumpy but he seems like he's someone who finds a lot of joy in competition and masculinity

Okay so Whitewater's final comic was never translated into english but i've got it thanks to the french. Donald and Daisy are trying to win a picnic basket contest (idk) and Whitewater shows up with his new girlfriend...Donna Duck! Frequently headcanon'd to be Daisy's sister (not canon), Donna is Donald's ex from Mexico

this comic doesn't really add anything to Whitewater's character except that he's definitely the jealous type (no one is surprised)

(he and Daisy are both dressed as Donald 'cause they're both trying to trick Donna for jealousy reasons)

& that's it! There you have all of Whitewater/Abner Duck's appearances lol most of what fans say about Abner are just headcanon from what I can tell

#abner duck #whitewater duck #duck comics #anon asks #carro answers #duck family tree #family tree

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enheriter · 11 months

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[ konidela ram charan, he/him, cisgender man ] — was that NARAYANA VOGETI? the THIRTY-SIX year old is a NAVY OFFICER, how exciting to see them this season! rumors have it they are ZEALOUS and GREGARIOUS, but i’ve heard they are AUDACIOUS and DUPLICITOUS as well — maybe that’s why they’ve been called the SEASWEPT. I have even heard that HE SUPPLEMENTS HIS FORTUNE THROUGH LESS THAN LEGITIMATE MEANS —only time will tell.

QUICK FACTS.

NAME: vogeti narayana naidu NICKNAME: nara AGE: thirty-six PLACE OF BIRTH: hyderabad, india GENDER: cisgender man PRONOUNS: he/him ORIENTATION: homosexual RELIGION: hinduism ( vaishnava ) PARENTS: vogeti venkateswara naidu ( diamond merchant ) & raghupathi ramalakshmi ( illustrator ) SIBLINGS vogeti arjuna naidu LANGUAGES: telugu, tamil, english, hindi ( fluent ) portuguese, french, arabic ( conversational ) latin, ancient greek ( competent ) danish, german ( basics ) EDUCATION: private tutoring OCCUPATION: commodore in the royal navy HOBBIES: illustration, linguistics, poetry, history, philosophy LABEL the seaswept

note: telugu family names are in the genitive case, and therefore come first. as such, the family name here is vogeti

PARALLELS.

james fitzjames ( the terror ) connor roy ( succession ) james gatz ( the great gatsby ) henry winter ( the secret history )

BIOGRAPHY.

tl;dr man literally goes to the ends of the earth to escape from his problems. ends up freezing his humanity instead. or whatever is left of it.

aka connor roy if he was the second son tw for implied unhealthy familial dynamics

born the second son of a fourth, you have always been destined for irrelevancy, and your childhood is naught but confirmation of that simple fact: too timid, too quiet; your nose too stuck in ancient books’ crumbling pages, the smell of old tomes almost like a perfume on your corpus. there’s nothing in you that speaks to some great destiny, the commissioning of some great deed to be recorded in those books you like reading so much. no, what is evident is this: your destiny is to read about life, maybe even to write about it, if you pull the right strings; but to live it ? that was for other people. better people. people who were born into greatness. meaning: people who aren’t you.

heirship never would have suited you, nor would it have suited your father; but what suited you both is the treasure upon treasure unearthed in golconda. it’s a great and terrible thing, to see for your own eyes the twinkling of gems still dusted with detritus; even more terrible to see how it transforms the face of your grandfather, who clutches at it with far more adoration and love than you have ever seen him bestow to his kith and kin.

he looks at your father, ever the most obedient servant, who stayed behind and didn’t even bother making his own fortune as his elder brothers did, content instead to wait upon his father like the most loyal dog. anyway, your grandfather looks at your father, the only one left whom he could still command, and he says you need to go to london.

but i have a wife and two children who have a life here your father does not say. arjuna and narayana have friends here, friends who they will miss your father does not say. you cannot expect me to unroot them and place them in a strange new frontier, just because of your greed your father does not say. your father is not a man who says anything much.

so you turn from vogeti narayana naidu, son of a farmer’s son to vogeti narayana naidu, son of a diamond merchant. you are dressed accordingly. you are trained accordingly. languages and music and arithmetic and philosophy and art and and and. all this and so much more your grandfather tells you, thinking it a blessing. this is your reward for your father’s filial duty.

nevertheless, you are not the heir. whatever expectations that have been placed upon you have been placed upon arjuna tenfold. perhaps, if you were a better man, a man destined for greater things, you might have been able to do something. stop it somehow. took your brother away and sailed the both of you home. but something always stops you, nothing moreso than this: back home, your grandfather yet lives, ready to send you back to the place that isn’t home. so the only thing you learn is this: even home is not safe, perhaps is the most unsafe place of all.

as arjuna’s second, you are expected to be his shadow; but who can cast a shadow where there is no sun? arjuna casts you off like a worn coat, and if you were a better man, you might have fought harder at this turn of events; but you are who you are, and all you are is a drop in an ocean too large for you to comprehend. you are left adrift in this place that you are ill-fitted in. the world is a dizzying place of possibility, and there are far too many options, too many choices, too many lost futures, too many forsaken pasts—

all you know is this: the only good dreams you have are those that involve the sea. the shore offers a certainty of danger that the sea, despite all its rocking embraces, never does. it is uncertain, true, and there have been very many ships and lives lost to that plutonian depths; but what is also true is this: the earth’s dangers are sure and ever-present; that of the sea, but a possibility. it’s a no-brainer: you enlist in the navy the very day you turn thirteen.

you were never destined for greatness, but you have a good head on your shoulders, an even quicker wit; your tutoring in the keeping of accounts gives you a numerical mastery that the royal navy sees and is quick to make use of. they ship you off to the arctic, over and over again, until all that you are, and all that you know, is bitter freezing cold.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

my boy is a Nerd forced to become a Prep so anyone who would let him geek out over anything nautical would immediately be his favourite people ever

he publishes poetry under a pseudonym but they’re all essentially “epics” of his voyages so like… people who recognise hmmm… you went out to so-so place… and now there’s a poem about so-so place… rlly makes u think!

he is a debate me bro twitter reply guy masquerading as a 19c sailor with extreme daddy issues so talk to him about philosophy/politics/history/etc and you are going to have the most Insufferable conversation ever

an introvert forced to become an extrovert (such tragedy!) so people he’s forced to like. actually talk to. bonus points if it’s about his dad’s diamond business, which he HATES talking about. but still does bc he is nothing if not a good son 💖

i mean. very much. hookups and one night stands bc can u imagine even being in a relationship with this guy? hahahahahah ok but pls do actually give this guy a relationship that didn’t work out and is now like. his green light or whatever

friends. who are like. actual friends and not just people who wanna get some of daddy’s bling bling. he will definitely Not come into ur dwelling place at night pretending to need a drink but all the pubs have kicked him out (do not believe him! no man will turn away the lure of money) when all he just wants is like… disgusting… COMPANIONSHIP

people who are in cahoots with his less than legit ventures. he may hate daddy’s money, but that doesn’t mean he can’t try to make his own!

#wdintro #❛ VOGETI NARAYANA ， INFO !#❛ ENHERITER ， INTRO !

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negative-speedforce · 8 months

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for Siv, Jay, Cassandra, and Hailey 𝗯𝗹𝘂𝗲 𝗹𝗮𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗻, 𝗽𝗶ñ𝗮 𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗮𝗱𝗮, 𝗷𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗹𝗲 𝗯𝗶𝗿𝗱, 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝘃𝗲𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿, 𝗱𝗮𝗶𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗿𝗶, 𝘁𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗮 𝘀𝘂𝗻𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗲, 𝗯𝗹𝘂𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘄𝗮𝗶𝗶, and 𝗰𝘂𝗯𝗮 𝗹𝗶𝗯𝗿𝗲 :)

Blue Lagoon: what does your oc wear to sleep? Do they have a dedicated set of pajamas or do they just wear whatever?

Siv: Usually wears a camisole and a pair of shorts, that's about it.

Jay: Sleeps in his boxers.

Cassandra: Has pajamas that Jay bought her.

Hailey: Wears pajamas to bed every night, no exceptions.

Pina Colada: if your oc has a bag or a purse, what are five things that'd be inside?

Siv: Keys, cellphone, dagger, assorted snacks, pendant with GIna's ashes

Jay: Pain meds, cellphone, pulse gauntlet, CIA pager, keys

Cassandra: Assorted witchcraft paraphernalia, gun, keys, cellphone, CIA pager

Hailey: CIA pager, keys, cellphone, cigarettes, red lipstick

Jungle Bird: has your oc ever made any choices they regret?

Siv: Sweetie, her life choices are all one big regret.

Jay: Regrets temporarily breaking up with Cassandra after his injuries

Cassandra: Regrets letting Jay come along on the mission to take back CCPD

Hailey: Regrets joining the Marines

Harvey Wallbanger: post some images or a moodboard that fit your oc's aesthetic.

Jay:

Cassandra:

Hailey:

Daiquiri: is your oc a smoker? (tobacco, cannabis, etc.) if so, do they plan on quitting?

Siv: Doesn't smoke

Jay: Smokes weed.

Cassandra: Doesn't smoke

Hailey: Smokes occasionally, because with her being a ghost it makes her feel alive.

Tequila Sunrise: what kind of hobbies does your oc enjoy? Is there anything they've always wanted to do but never had the time/resources to try?

Siv: Plays guitar and works out. Wants to pick up oil painting but doesn't have time.

Jay: Enjoys coding and fiddling around with tech, also training/playing with his old dog at his parents' place.

Cassandra: Cooking and pottery, and while this is less of a hobby than something that basically consumes her entire life, witchcraft.

Hailey: Enjoys cooking and Samba dancing, wants to get into media analysis but doesn't have time.

Blue Hawaii: does your oc speak any other language(s)? If they didnt learn to speak the language(s) when they were growing up, when and why did they learn it?

Siv: Speaks English, French, and Klingon fluently. They learned Klingon from Cisco during Summer Break in 8th grade, and she's been taking French classes since she was in preschool (rich people French Immersion preschool). They also leaned conversational Spanish in order to better communicate with Gina back when they were first getting to know each other.

Jay: Speaks English, Spanish, Mandarin, and German fluently, which he picked up because of important missions.

Cassandra: Speaks English, is also fluent in Spanish, which she took in High School and College, French, and Mandarin (from missions), and is learning Danish and Japanese (for future missions).

Hailey: Speaks English, learned French and Russian as a child in order to communicate during her family's frequent missions trips around the EU. Learned conversational Greek and Arabic for missions, and is currently learning Vietnamese in order to connect with her birth culture.

Cuba Libre: if your oc wears any perfume/cologne, whats their favorite?

Siv: CK One by Calvin Klein

Hailey: Alien by Thierry Mugler

Jay: Eros by Versace

Cassandra: Coco Noir by Chanel

#ask revan #oc shit #vexic :D

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