#plant that cucumber baby | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

aurorawritestoescape · 25 days

Text

FEED ME || Joel Miller x f!reader || 2,3k

Summary: Joel is hungry but not for dinner

Tw: 18+ mdni, smut, pwp, food play, object insertion, m/f!oral, swearing, cum eating, Joel is a horny menace, fingering, a bit of degradation, Joel can pick up reader, reader wears a dress, has hair that can be pulled

A/n: hugs and smooches to @iamasaddie for the gif🌸

MASTERLIST

*****

“What are we making?”

You jump hearing Joel’s gruff voice right at your ear.

“Joel! I’m holding a knife!” you exclaim, pressing your free hand to your chest. Your heart is booming under your palm as you are silently cursing your sneaky husband.

He hugs you from behind, caging you against the counter, and you breathe out your tension, feeling his warm body pressed to your back.

“What are you cooking, baby?” His scruff is rubbing your shoulder as he’s pushing the fabric of your home dress out of his way and kisses the spot at the crease of your neck.

You smile already melting from this cute gesture but don’t turn around. You focus back on the task at hand - chopping a pepper.

“Salad,” you reply.

He hums and you feel his hands glide from your waist down to your sides. While you’re working the knife, trying not to cut your finger off, he bunches up the skirt of your dress and his warm palms grab your hips.

“Nah-ah,” you slither out of his embrace and step to the sink. “I’m hungry, Joel,” you say, feeling a pang of guilt for refusing him but nonetheless enjoying the way he glares at you under his brows, hands still braced on the counter. He looks so sexy like this.

“You can wait until after the dinner, right?”

You give him a sweet smile before turning on the water. You grab a cucumber out of a big bowl and start washing it. Joel’s intent stare is focused on you while your hands are gliding around the vegetable. You forget about your audience for a second doing a thorough job cleaning the cucumber until it squeaks under your palms. Suddenly Joel curses under his breath and storms out of the room.

You furrow your brows, confused by his behavior and hoping that you haven’t offended him. But Joel is caring and always attentive to your needs, even when he’s thinking with his perfect cock.

So you dry the cucumber and return to your chopping board.

Joel doesn’t sneak up on you this time but you still jump when you hear him shout, “DON’T! Don’t cut it!”

You freeze clutching the knife in your hand, but now it’s trembling with rage rather than with fear like before.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” You shrill and turn around before throwing the knife on the counter.

Joel walks to one of the cupboards, opens it and after a few seconds of consideration takes something out.

Your eyes are wide and you hope the heat of your fiery glower can burn him. It seems that he feels it, judging by the way he inches towards you with a little apologetic smile, holding out a protein bar.

“Sorry for scaring you, baby,” he coos, stepping up to you, “Here. Have a snack.”

“I don’t want a fucking snack, Joel,” you grumble looking up at the man from behind your eyebrows, “From now on you’re banned from the kitchen when I’m cooking, you hear me?

“Yeah, yeah. But after today, ‘k?” He opens the protein bar and brings it to your lips. You don’t eat it, standing immovable in front of him, still throwing daggers at his handsome face.

“C’mon, sweetheart. I really want you.” He puts the bar on the counter and his hands start gently rubbing your arms, moving up and down. He pecks your cheek, the other one, plants a kiss on your nose and forehead. His moustache tickles you and you giggle trying to dodge the kisses he’s peppering all over your face.

With your palms on his broad chest, you give up and let him embrace you. He presses his hips to yours and you feel him hard against your mound.

You whimper, blaming your weak pussy for the way you crumble only after sensing the shape of his stiff cock.

Joel licks his lips and leans down to give you a heady kiss, passionate but soft. His hands are touching you everywhere - kneading your breasts, squeezing your ass cheeks, running through your hair and pulling on it lightly.

Soon you’re moaning into his mouth, soaking your panties, and buck your hips into his.

“Oh, what is it? Thought you were hungry, baby. Guess your slutty pussy wants to swallow my cock more, huh?”

You whine nuzzling his neck while a fire starts burning inside your core. Dinner be damned, you want to be filled with his cock.

“That’s what I thought,” he smirks, pushes the board and the knife to the side and lifts you, setting you on the counter.

In a second your panties are discarded on the floor and Joel is kneeling next to them.

He grabs your ankle and pushes your leg up, placing one foot on the counter. Your glistening pussy blooms for him and you bite your lip when cold air hits your heated folds.

Not waiting for an invitation, Joel latches onto your clit and you mewl with pleasure, eyes shut, hands pulling on his hair. His hot tongue is swirling eights against your bud while his thick fingers prod your wet hole before he pushes them in and starts pumping in and out. He curves them just right and you come undone, clit twitching against his tongue, pussy clenching on his digits.

Joel pulls them out and licks them clean while you’re panting, mind and vision hazy after a bright orgasm.

Joel gets up and while you’re reveling in the post orgasmic euphoria you don’t notice his hand sneaking behind you.

Something cold touches your leg and you open your eyes seeing Joel slide a tip of the cucumber up and down your inner thigh.

"Joel, what are you doing?" you giggle nervously trying to close your legs.

"Shh... l've got an idea," he says, holding your legs open for him with his big hands on your inner thighs. "All your fault, sweetheart. When you were washing it...Damn it. The way your hands glided over this thing. My dick loved it."

"Ehm,” is the only thing you can say. You're surprised and even more so when he takes out a condom out of his pocket. You haven't used one in a while with you being on the pill and him being the biggest fan of creampies.

"I can, right, baby?" He asks before opening the package with his teeth and pulling the condom out.

"Do you... what do you..?" You mumble trying to gather your thoughts after the recent orgasm and wrap your head around whatever his intention is.

Your jaw drops when you watch him put the condom on the long thick vegetable like it's some weird sex ed class and he says,

"Gonna fuck you with this cucumber, 'k?"

“But Joel…it’s big,” you mewl, eyeing the thing and trying to imagine it in your pussy.

“My cock is big, baby, and you take it so well. And I’ll get you ready, sweetheart, don’t worry.”

You look at the cucumber, then into Joel’s pleading eyes and feel your pussy get curious and start tingling again at the promise of something long and thick stuffed inside it.

You nod and Joel beams at you and takes you in his arms.

“Let’s get you to the bed.”

***

A few moments later you’re lying on your bed, completely naked, with a couple of pillows stuffed under your back, so you could see and control what’s about to happen to your pussy.

Joel’s sitting on his heels between your legs, spotting a giant tent in his boxers but he doesn’t do anything about it. His hand is gripping your knee, and he’s holding a bottle of lube in the other, warming it up. The cucumber is on the bed next to your hip, looking thicker and longer than Joel’s cock. And Joel’s cock is huge. You swallow loudly and Joel notices your tension.

“Breathe, baby,” Joel says, giving you a warm smile. “I’ll be careful,” he murmurs and you know he will. Something warm and fuzzy moves in your stomach and you whisper back, “I trust you.”

His eyes are blown with lust, lips glistening and you feel you can come just from an image of him being so thirsty for you.

His fingers trail from your knee to your pussy until he brings them to your clit and begins gently stroking it.

Joel puts the lube on the bed and slowly pushes three fingers into your hole, palm up. They move in and out easily but apparently it’s not enough.

“Play with your tits, sweetheart. C’mon,”

He doesn’t have to repeat it, in a second you’re kneading your breasts, twitching your hardened nipples and your pussy clenches as a new wave of arousal ripples through your body. You moan and rock your hips desperate for more stimulation.

“Joel, stick it in me already!”

He chuckles as his little finger joins the other three inside your pussy.

“Attagirl. Ready?”

You nod and open your thighs wider. Joel's digits leave your stretched hole and he gets the unconventional sex toy ready, squirting some lube on it and spreading it with his fingers. Caressing your bud with one hand, he brings the cucumber to your crying hole and nudges it with the tip.

You breathe in sharply feeling something cold and hard at the softest and warmest place of your body.

You whimper when he slides the firm vegetable between your folds and then starts slowly pushing it in your wet entrance. The stretch makes your muscles tense but Joel swirls your clit between his fingers and the dull pain subsides almost instantly.

“Tell me and I’ll stop,” he says, love and affection coating his voice.

Joel doesn’t tear his eyes from the sight of him feeding this huge cucumber to your pussy. He inserts a few inches of the stiff vegetable in and pulls it out almost to the end and then pushes it in again, deeper now.

He repeats these actions a few times and you whimper, clutching the sheets with your fingers as the cucumber’s bumps are deliciously massaging your walls.

“Damn it, baby, I wanna be this thing so fucking much right now,” Joel groans and grips your thigh harder.

“Yeah?” you breathe out, fluttering your eyes shut when you feel the tip rub against your soft spot.

You love when Joel's cock ruins your little cunt but you’re experiencing such an unusual novice sensation at this moment that you don’t want it to leave your pussy yet.

“Don’t stop, Joel. Please,” You plead as your cunt clenches around the vegetable.

“Fuck, look at it.”

His hand leaves the cucumber and when your walls contract, your cunt sucks it deeper on its own. You’re both mesmerized, eyes half lidded and hazy, mouths slightly opened, watching the cucumber stick out of your hungry hole.

“She’s swallowing it on her own. Greedy little pussy. You’re really enjoying it, huh?”

You nod eagerly and he smiles.

“That’s my girl.”

“Joel?” You call when he gets a hold of the cucumber again. “Come here. Give me your cock.”

You motion to the spot next to you on the bed.

“But don’t stop fucking me with it,” you hastily add, earning a chuckle from Joel.

“At this rate you won’t need me anymore,” he complains, pouting his lips but breathing into a grin.

“Never, I love the taste of your cock too much.”

Joel gently pulls the cucumber out of your pussy and gets closer to your face.

He stands on his knees and pulls his cock out. It’s painfully hard, bobbing over your face and dripping precum everywhere.

“Oh, Joel, give it.” You lick your lips and lift yourself on your elbows.

Your mouth reaches his fat head and you lick and suck it, drinking his salty precum. His desperate moan makes you feel slightly guilty for not offering to blow him earlier.

Joel leans down a little and starts fucking you with the cucumber again. You take his length deeper in your mouth and suck on his stiff cock caressing the underside with your tongue. His soft lower belly rubs against your forehead while he’s thrusting the vegetable in and out with faster strokes. You’re a complete mess, the mixture of lube and your slick sliding down to your asshole and soaking the bedding under you.

“Fuck…won’t last, sweetheart. Your mouth is killing me…damn, wish you could see your pussy, baby…you’re talking it so fucking well…my perfect girl.”

You gasp around his cock when he leans lower and takes your throbbing clit between his lips again. He’s sloppily licking your folds, sucking on your sensitive bud and you feel the warmth of your upcoming climax turn into scorching heat. He pushes the cucumber in and out once, twice and you explode, crying and whimpering, mouth full of his cock.

Apparently Joel was waiting just for that.

He finally erupts into your throat with a loud groan and you’re swallowing his warm cum as your back arches, pussy clumps on the stiffness inside you and fireworks burst in your mind.

You drink him to the last drop, and his mouth doesn’t leave your pussy either, he’s rubbing your clit with the flat of his tongue until you push him away, being overstimulated.

You part from his softening cock and plop your back on the bed catching your breath. Joel slowly pulls the cucumber out of your soaked hole and falls next to you panting heavily.

“Thank you for letting me do this, baby,” he coos before giving you a gentle kiss. Then he takes the glistening condom off, throws it on the bed and hands you the cucumber. “Here’s your dinner back,” he chuckles and you giggle with him.

“No way, Joel. First of all, we’re ordering in tonight and second,” you press the cucumber to your chest, making heart eyes at it, “I’m not eating him.”

“Him?”

“Yep. He’s living with us now,” you say trying to contain your laughter, “I’m gonna call him Dave.”

“Little slut,” Joel growls, pins you to the bed and shuts you up with a kiss.

*****

Thank you for reading!🌸

Comments and reblogs will make me very happy and help to spread my work!💖

Masterlist

Tag list: @milla-frenchy @harriedandharassed @missannfairy @iamasaddie @nervousmumbling @bbyanarchist @stevie75 @puduvallee @auteurdelabre @mountainsandmayhem @senoratess @flamingochick55 @theoraekenslover

#pedro pascal #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #pedro pascal characters #joel miller x you #the last of us #joel miller tlou #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller fan fiction #pedro pascal smut #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfic #joel miller the last of us

739 notes · View notes

gojoest · 4 months

Text

pregnancy freak satoru loves to put his hands on your baby bump—be it by subtle silly touches, or those that are strongly protective, or the ones that are loving or yearning—he lives for it, to touch his creation.

when you brush your teeth in the morning and his free hand reaches to rub your belly, looking at you at the same time, the mother of his unborn, with a silly face—toothpaste leaking from the corners of his mouth and eyes that smile a proud “heh, i put that there. heh, heh. heheheheh. heh.”;

when you take a stroll outside and walk by strangers and his initial instinct is to protect you, both of you—that shape his entire world. so, naturally his hand lands on the low of your back and the other covers your belly with the entirety of his palm, fingertips gently but securely glued on it—in a very don’t you dare brush against them or i’ll blast you away with everything i’ve got in me manner that it reflects on his eyes as they throw daggers at the person who was, probably, only rushing back to work from their lunch break and, unfortunately, happened to be near you;

when you’re making dinner and he comes back home, sneaks from behind and wraps his arms around you, plants a soft peck on your shoulder as he takes the knife off your hand so he can continue where you left off—the mother of his child must absolutely not lift anything that weighs more than a feather—still, though, he asks you to hold the cucumber in place on the chopping board for him as his other hand is busy caressing your belly, reuniting with his baby after a long and tiring day dealing with curses and higher-ups;

when you go to bed at night, all comfortably spooned and ready to doze off, that is, until his hips start humping you from behind, his erection making its presence known by the way it grows bigger and bigger rub after rub between your ass cheeks all while his arm is rested on your side, hand reaching to your swollen belly to hold his creation—that he and you together made—through the skin against his palm.

#— ai rambles #tw pregnancy #this is so chaotic but i keep thinking about him im sorry t-t #[ ♡ ] — satoru #pregnancy freak!satoru #<-doing my best to track anything with this concept under this tag btw #gojo x reader

891 notes · View notes

yawnderu · 4 months

Note

Bimbo!reader giving simon a home spa day, like making sure simon looks ABSOLUTELY glamorous everywhere!

bimbo!reader loves having spa days with Simon 😭 she bought a few products for his dry skin, always wanting to help him relax after he comes back home :3

“I said sit down.” You push him back down on the bathtub, forcing him to stay in the water despite the way his fingers are looking like raisins, wrinkling up after almost 30 minutes of being in the water.

“'M gonna melt, angel.” His protest goes ignored much to his amusement, brown eyes fully focused on the way you're working on applying some sort of mask on his hair, despite the way he has a buzz cut.

“You'll live.” You finally reply with a teasing smile, massaging the deep treatment hair mask onto short hair, your long nails softly running along his scalp. He allows himself to fully relax, taking in the smell of the lavender bath bubbles you put in the water, bathroom lights dim to give him the full spa experience.

You carefully wash the treatment off his hair after a few minutes of waiting for it to set in, helping him out of the bathtub and wrapping a towel over his naked torso, a new one going to dry his hair.

Being taken care of and spoiled is something completely new to Simon— the last time was when he was a baby, his mum bathing him and trying to give him a nice experience despite his father's protests about her spending money on what he thought was bullshit, He closes his eyes, placing all his trust on you to take care of him without feeling burdened.

“Now we're gonna do skincare, I got some new products for you that I'm dying to use.” You coo at him, excitedly holding his hand and guiding him back to your bed, helping him lay down on the freshly changed satin sheets.

He watches with amusement as you come back with a pink basket overflowing with skincare products that you bought specifically for him. You sit in bed, leaning down to plant a soft kiss before you start rummaging through the basket, trying to find a product to begin with now that his face is clean from the bath. He's never seen you this focused, the tip of your tongue poking out of your glossy lips. His hand goes to your side on instinct, rubbing up and down soothingly.

“Alright, so we're starting with a mud mask.” You put on your best YouTuber voice, making a small smile to set on his lips at the act. Your hands work carefully, the pads of your fingers gliding along his dry skin, spreading the grey mask all over his face, making sure to avoid applying it on his thin eyebrows and lips.

“Close your eyes.” Not only was he staring into your soul— you also have other plans for his eyes. You go to the skincare fridge in your closet, pulling out a small container with cold, cut slices of cucumber that you prepared the night before.

“Are you gonna kill me?” He asks jokingly, mirth in his tone despite the way he actually closes his eyes, fully trusting you.

“Not yet.” Your playful tone makes him smile, fully aware that it's all a joke. You put the cold slices of cucumber over his eyes, giggling at the way his face scrunches up at the feeling.

“Fuckin' hell.” It feels way too weird— completely new to him. You let the face mask set for a few minutes before cleaning it off with a wet cloth, removing the cucumber slices from over his eyes. The dark bags under his eyes becoming slightly less prominent. You lean down to capture his lips in a kiss that he immediately returns, his hand going up to your waist and running up and down gently, always looking forward to feeling your body.

“Alright, now we're gonna apply some cream.” You spoil me too much, he thinks. A small smile makes way to his lips, happy that he found someone who loves to dote on him this much without ever complaining about it. You're having fun taking care of him, making a little spa out of your shared flat.

Your soft hands massage the product all over his much softer skin, making you realize just how much better his skin has gotten ever since you started doing his skincare months ago. You tap the pads of your fingers on his skin as you get done, making sure the cream gets into his pores well.

“Do this.” You pucker your lips, grinning down at him when he does it back with no hesitation. You apply a small amount of strawberry lip balm all over his thin, chapped lips, proud at seeing the way they become softer.

Who cares if Johnny teases him about becoming a ''pretty boy''? He doesn't have a girlfriend who spoils him, while Simon does. Yeah, shut up, Johnny.

Bimbo!Reader Masterlist

791 notes · View notes

kokomatdoroshi · 2 years

Text

i had to sacrifice my green bean plant(s) to save the rest of the bed from spider mites everybody say rest in peace geebee

#i feel like they came out of nowhere/overnight even though i know that's not possible lmao #it was a full on infestation this morning smh #but i got a good harvest this year/doing better each year so i'll be okay #i guesss #i did it for the tomato plant that's just growing fruit and the peppers that's just starting to flower a(wo)men #also also my cucumber plant is bitter from heat stress i hate georgia summers #i'm gonna see if these currently growing cukes are bitter #and if they are then ik it's over and i'll dispose of that baby too #and i'll just get the fall garden starting #bri.txt

0 notes

rarepears · 4 months

Note

AU where SJ is Ning Yingying's biological father, but it was never said in the published version of PIDW, it was just in Airplane's notes. Only Yue Qingyuan & Mu Qingfang know. Flash to SY transmigrating into SJ's body and Ning Yingying slips up and says "Daddy, are you ok? You're acting weird". SY flips out in true Peerless Cucumber fashion.

Okay back up. How does Shen Jiu have a kid in the first place? Who is her mother?? A prostitute that he happens to develop feelings for after visiting the Red Pavilion so often? Perhaps in corresponding with his (annoying) disciples' parents, he meets a widowed aunt and they start up something special. Certainly, Shen Jiu never thought he would end up marrying a noble woman in this way, but his marriage is cut short with his wife dying in childbirth.

Or is it the other way where Shen Jiu gets the mpreg experience?

Maybe Ning Yingying is a plant baby.

But regardless of how it happens, Shen Yuan's first thought is probably that Shen Jiu is an adoptive parent, not a biological parent. And he does his very best to think in only that direction. It's pretty easy to do that all things considering until Ning Yingying asks Shen Yuan when the two are going to visit her other parent's grave-

#svsss #svsss ideas #svsss au #shen qingqiu #shen jiu #shen yuan #mxtx #scum villain's self saving system #AU where SJ is Ning Yingying's biological father

188 notes · View notes

absurdthirst · 8 months

Note

Hey! I hope you’re having a nice day and don’t feel pressured to answer this, but how do you think the Pedro boys would react to having triplets? (I just learned im having two boys and one girl)

Heaven knows I’m already worried about mine with the casually offered reductions and all the talks about how difficult it’s going to be since it’s my first time. My heart goes out for the Pedro boys in less advanced universes knowing the complications that could come up.

Having Triplets:

Javier Peña: Gets drunk. Like - very drunk. Smokes an entire pack of cigarettes while he drinks. Worrying. Obsessing over the idea that he was already nervous to be responsible for one kid, but three???? He's never gonna sleep again. He's going to be grey by the time the kids are born, or bald from the stress. Once he's gotten over his hangover, he's asking questions. Demanding to know the risks and he has a fucking notebook full of questions for the doctors every time you go. Turns into the most solid father that you've ever seen.

Ezra: Speechless. For the first time since you have met the loquacious prospector, he is completely speechless. "I don't quite thing your suit's gonna be fitting you soon, little gem." His life has been one big adventure and he has just floated along. Now he will have to put that sharp mind to work to make sure that his little family has their feet firmly planted on a safe planet. Ezra will be planting roots - just don't ask him where he acquired the things he brings home for the babies.

Mando: Have you ever seen a wall of metal worry? That's what it would be like. This towering hunk of beskar would just lurk and be underfoot. Silently watching and you would wake up to any and all little luxuries that he could possibly get his hands on. The man would invest in a real bed for Maker's sake. He would even get a medical droid, putting aside his dislike for most tech to make sure you had the best help available.

Pero Tovar: Pero wonders why you are as big as a horse. (You hit him with a frying pan for saying that) When the midwife tells him that she feels more than one babe in your belly, he starts to worry. Childbirth in his days is not without risk and multiple babes are even riskier. He will start praying to God to allow the babes to born healthy and breaking his back even more to provide for the four of you.

Frankie Morales: His military training is the only goddamn thing keeping this man from having a panic attack, or a stroke. Definitely going to be getting high one last time before he flushes the coke down the toilet. If for nothing but to work out that fear without you knowing. To your face, Francisco Morales would be the most calm, rational man with dealing with the idea of triplets. He even trades in his beloved truck for a van - not a mini van, because those things drive like fucking ass - but a cargo van to haul the kids and all their shit around. He will be working himself into the ground to his get license re-instated so he can be earning more. He can't raise triplets on his retirement alone.

Agent Whiskey: In complete denial. Absolutely refuses to believe that you are having more than one baby. Like complete disassociates when it comes to that. Despite Ginger confirming it and everyone talking about the babies. He's convinced that everyone is pulling some elaborate trick on him. Right up until the moment he has baby number one in his arms and you start pushing again for the next one. Then shit gets real.

Dave York: Dave is another cool cucumber when it comes to dealing with the idea of triplets. He starts planning. Logistics is what matters. Paying for these kids. He will start taking more contracts and being away from home, but he always tries to make sure he's home for doctor's appointments. Surprisingly handy. Already put together the three cribs and started stocking up on diapers. He's changed his share before with Molly and Alice, but this time it's going to be interesting with three at the same time.

Oberyn Martell: Thrilled. He will be on the maester's ass to make sure that the births are smooth sailing for you. Multiple babies at once? He will enjoy running his hands over your swollen belly and making sure that the servants are nearby all the time so you do not have to do a thing. Spending hours with you in the water because it easy on your body with all three babies growing. Present for every moment from the moment your pains begin, until you are holding all three.

Max Phillips: Mixed feelings honestly. Three little baby biters? Pretty cool. Three sets of dirty diapers to change? Less so. Max is smarmy and cocky, but the cracks of that facade start to show when he realizes he's made three tiny little half vamp/half human beings that will need to be cared for. He might even put his little feud with Evan aside because the man has bigger fish to fry. But expect him to start offering you blood smoothies. You know, for protein.

Marcus Pike: The combination of stress and excitement inside him is like being pulled in two different directions at once. Immediately starts reading books on the subject of twins and making a detailed list of everything you need to buy. Will be making full use of his paternity leave to help you with the babies.

Marcus Moreno: It's a good goddamn thing he's a super hero. Marcus literally saves the world, so he is used to stress. There's a little bit of panic behind those rimmed Clark Kent glasses he has and he wonders if his powers was what caused this. He knew that copper IUD was a bad idea. He can only hope that Missy loves being a big sister, because she's gonna have 3 younger siblings.

Max Lord: Passes out. Literally the man faints at the news that he is going to be a father to triplets. The internal panicking that this man does rivals ten men. Nearly enough to do something stupid like wish he had the dream stone back, but not quite. You end up having to calm him down.

Zach Wellison: Gets a second job. Then a third. You practically don't see the man for nearly three weeks after being told that he's going to have triplets with you because he's working so damn much. Trying to make sure that he can buy everything you need and provide for the babies. Only starts to slow down when you remind him that you need him with you now. You don't want to do this alone. It takes him a minute to get that through his head, but he's pretty happy as soon as he gives himself a moment to be.

Dieter Bravo: FREAKS OUT. Like has a melt down as he denies it. Until he can see the ultrasound and has the three little nuggets pointed out to him. He's wide eyed and asking you if you want some of his drugs. You might need them more than him. When you decline, he takes all of them himself and starts to ask if you feel any different now. Playing with your stomach and talking to the babies as he lays out why is he upset. He's scared. Scared he's going to screw up and then it's three little people he's fucked up. Showing exactly why Dieter will end up being a good dad. Whacky as shit, but a good dad.

Javi Gutierrez: Obsessed with them. He has already been thrilled by your pregnancy and having a baby, but now that there will be three? Completely in love with the idea of built in best friends. The decorating of the nursery is now tripled and Javi just completely throws himself into it and treats you like a queen the entire time. Waits on you hand and foot and marvels over your changing body. Gets you one of those belly harnesses to make sure that you are as comfortable as you can be.

Tim Rockford: Have you ever seen the scene of a man pacing back and forth and running his hands through his hair? That's Tim. Like seriously concerned with how he is going to pay for three babies. On a detective's salary. There's going to be a lot of overtime in this man's future.

Joel Miller: What the hell can he do? Not like he can go back and unring that bell. He's panicking, his heart racing and his entire body feeling weak but he hides that from you. Does you no good and he won't have you worrying. He's fucking worried. Because this is a shit world you live in and there's a very real possibility that he will lose you and the babies. Rest assured that he will BURN THE WORLD DOWN to keep you and them safe.

🎉🎉Congratulation Anon!!! I hope that you have a smooth rest of your pregnancy and birth! Fingers crossed and good vibes being send your way!!!

#pedro pascal #the mandalorian #pero tovar #marcus moreno #agent whiskey #dieter bravo #ezra prospect #javier peña #dave york #oberyn martell #frankie morales #marcus pike #max phillips #javier gutierrez #tim rockford #joel miller #zach wellison #max lord #headcanons

279 notes · View notes

etoilesbienne · 8 months

Text

jaiden just gave etoiles cucumbers and cucumber seeds and went look etoiles i found you. and seeds for your babies. and he very happily accepted them to plant in his horrible gymnasium base. i don't want to think about what the seeds imply.

174 notes · View notes

tassjis · 3 months

Text

A list of objects and technologies created by Myne

The gremlin has been busy. Anything red was created by another, but without Myne creating something else, the creator would not have made it, so Myne's name is not listed as the creator but Myne was the reason it was made. Anything blue was improved upon

VEHICLES

A horse-drawn carriage with suspension

FURNITURE

Spring mattress spring upholstery - Zach

COSMETICS + ACCESSORIES

Rinsham - all-in-one shampoo Hair Ornaments Librarians armband Tote bag - improved

FASHION

Bubble skirts Halter-top dress Tie-dye - previously existed Wax Dyeing Stencil Dyeing Water ripple embroidery

EVENTS

Tasting party Charity Concert Dying competition

TOYS

Karuta Reversi Chess Playing Cards Baby Rattle Educational baby toys - such as shaped blocks and holes implied other toys

FOOD - Ingredients and condiments -

Compote Tanieh Cream Gelatin Gnocchi Gratin Herb Dressing Lage Sauce (Basil Sauce) Mayonnaise Yeast Pasta Ponzu Sauce Pomme sauce Rumptopf Rutreb Jam White sauce

- Savoury -

Capellini Caprese Salad Carbonara Consomme Soup Double Consomme Soup - Leise Crispy-Crispy Launeide and Sujaru Salad (Vegetable Salad) Crun-Crun Ju-Ju Farba (Chicken Salad) Cappellini Fikken - improved Fluffy Bread Sandwich - Improved with fluffy bread Hamburg Steak Lasagne Macaroni Gratin Osso Buco - Later improved by Leise Parue Burger Parue Okonomiyaki Pizza Potatoffel salad Pomme Soup Risotto Steamed Potatoffel Steamed Taschitz (chicken) Quiche French Toast Salted Cucumber imitation

- Sweet -

Bavarois Cookies Langues De Chat Crepe Fallfold Tart - Nicola Ice Cream Mille Crepe Mousse Panna Cotta Paru Cake Pound Cake Pudding Short Cake Tiramisu Tanier Cream/Mont Blanc

TOOLS

Chopsticks Clothes Hanger - improved Hairpin Herbal Candles Crochet hook Hand pump Hide Glue Steamer Precision Knife Roller Starch Glue Metal letter types Round Bell Safety Pin

MACHINES

Waxing Machine Letterpress Machine

PRINTING TYPES

Woodblock printing Stencil printing Letterpress printing

STATIONARY

Clay Tablet Mokkan Faux Papyrus Dipitch Dipitch Stylus Soot pencil Linseed and soot Ink Colour Ink Folders

- Paper -

Plant Paper (Volrin paper) Conjoining Paper (Nenseb paper) Effon (Music) Paper Fireproof Paper (Trombe paper) Rinfin Paper - Illgner Wax paper (Wax/Rinfin paper) Trauperle Paper -Illgner

- Magic Paper -

Enhanced Conjoining paper - Drewanchel Spellcasting Nenseb paper (Nenseb/Trombe with magic circle) Spellcasting effon paper (Effon/Trombe with chant) Maximum Quality Fey Paper (Effon/Trombe/Nenseb) improved by Ferdinand

MAGIC TOOLS

Music Box with Effon paper (technically made by Ehrenfest students) Drivable Highbeast Rainbow Highbeast Stenluke Disappearing Ink Plush Toy with recorded messages Magic tool to send books back to their shelves

MAGIC

Water Gun Copy and Place

KNOWLEDGE

Salting Out Lace knitting Written Calculation Decorative shaped vegetables Origami Introductory system Tickets Red seal Trading Graphs Myne Decimal System Rosemyne Magic Compression Method Female Crest Copyright royalties Questionnaire survey

PRINTED PRODUCTS

Black and white picture Book Children's Bible - Supreme God and the Eternal Five Children's Bible - Spring Subordinates Children's Bible - Summer Subordinates Children's Bible - Autumn Subordinates Children's Bible - Winter Subordinates Story Books Knight's Tale (short stories 1-3) - Compiled and translated Knight's Tale (short stories 4-5) - Compiled and translated Mother's Bedtime Stories Collection Unnamed Operation Grimm Book (Groschel) - Lutz Etiquette and Noble Euphamisms Book 1 - Fran Etiquette and Noble Euphamisms Book 2 - Fran Rozemyne's Recipe collection Knight's stories - Elvira Royal Academy stories - Elvira Royal Academy love stories - Elvira A history of Dunklefelger - Compiled and translated Knight stories Ahrensbach - Compiled Ditter Story - Roderick Royal Academy love stories 2 - Elvira The tale of Fernstine Part 1 - 3 - Elvira Sheet Music Concert programs Accounting report Printed illustrations (created to promote a knight's tale) Ferdinand illustations Cinderella Romance Novel (pornographic smut)

Songs

Tulip Anime Song Song for the concert Movie theme song "Under the chestnut tree" A hymn for Eglantine (requested by Anastasius) A couple classical songs

#ascendance of a bookworm #honzuki no gekokujou #I may have missed something #if you notice anything wrong or missing let me know

58 notes · View notes

kedreeva · 3 days

Note

What’s a good food that peafowls tend to really like! I have tried blue berries and they seemed to really enjoy that!

I have some fruits at home and I can safely feed them as they live in my city

Mainly mangos, plantains,Asian pear, and apple!

They can eat mangos, plantains, pears, and apples, but they probably WON'T eat mangoes or apples. they MIGHT eat pears, and they'll probably eat plantains (idk how sweet plantains are, but if they taste anything like bananas, then peafowl love banana so they should go for it). They prefer small bites of things, but I've never had a bird who enjoyed the taste of plain apples or was particularly impressed with mango, if they'll even try it in the first place. I've never had a pea willing to eat papaya at all, they won't even touch it here.

Beloved favorite fruits here are blueberries, watermelon (cut in half and just put out, they will Destroy it with glee), cantelope (more hesitant, but once they figure it out they love it just cut in half and put out for them), blackberries, cherries (pitted), raspberries (especially black raspberries), bananas (cut up), and cut grapes (they'll SOMETIMES eat whole ones if they're small but they may ignore whole grapes if they're too large to be appealing and they can't taste juice). They prefer darker grapes to green grapes. If they're offered nothing better, they'll eat cutup strawberries, pears, apples, peaches, and honeydew melon, but it's Under Protest. Mine won't touch papaya or kiwi or citrus fruits (except Bug, who loves canned mandarin oranges).

I know it's not fruit, but they will also eat veggies, just less enthusiastically. I've found boiling carrots to make them just a LITTLE softer gets better results. They love cucumber, tomato, and basically any kind of pepper (even hot ones, capsaicin doesn't affect them like it does mammals). They can be offered cooked potato, but raw should be avoided. Raw or cooked sweet potato is fine, but they're more likely to eat cooked. Pumpkin is also fine in any state, and they will delight in Destroying a raw one cut in half- same goes for any pumpkin-like squash like spaghetti or acorn or whatever.

They also really like cooked pasta, like elbow macaroni, roasted peanuts, raw shrimp (cut up), small raw fish (minnows, guppies, goldfish, mollies, platies, baby panfish like bluegill fry, etc), f/t pinkie mice, live bugs (crickets, dubia roaches, superworms, mealworms, waxworms, hornworms (domestically raised blue ones, the green ones that have fed on tomato plants may contain toxic amounts of solanine), silkworms, etc), and leafy greens (though if yours are free range ferals that's probably not as appealing). You can by processed treats, they really like suet nuggest, preferably in blueberry or other fruit flavors, but they'll eat the normal stuff too.

Mine also really like a bowl of their normal chow, with water added to make it soft. They can lack enthusiasm for a lot of raw/fresh foods, but they always bicker over who gets to eat the wet chow first.

#asks #peafowl #anon asks

33 notes · View notes

cornerdreams-txt · 1 year

Text

random little things that i think the mw22 cast would like.

simon riley; “ghost”

web weaving. gathering quotes and lines from books and poetry and history, collecting lyrics and artwork, then putting them all together in the theme of a person, a place, a thing, a memory, something. creating a piece of artwork centered around a single person’s experience with something they can recall. sharing an experience, emotions, memories, without ever having to say a single word.

john mactavish; “soap”

baking using ingredients he grew. knowing every rain shower the cucumbers got, knowing the strawberries were just picked a few minutes ago. taking seeds and making something out of nothing using soil and water and the sunlight outside his home, taking that something and making it into something more, and then holding it out in offering and gift for the people he knows. making his own food, and providing it as a show of his care for the people he’s around.

john price

photography. capturing a single moment in memory forever, keeping memories and emotions stored somewhere safe, so that their faces and the place and the state of the world just then is, even as the world changes neverendingly, never forgotten, and can be easily remembered. being able to keep a moment he holds dear in his pocket, hidden from the cruelty of wars and military force. a log of his own life, so he never has to forget the things he loves.

kyle garrick; “gaz”

origami. taking such an ordinary sheet of paper and folding it over and over and turning it and folding and unfolding and then folding again, until a personally created, holdable piece of artwork rests in his hands, something he made to keep his hands busy, something he can look at and know that he made that, no matter how many tries it first took.

nikolai

astronomy. using the stars as his guide, knowing the story behind every constellation, being able to know exactly why the stars look as they do, knowing what lies beyond them and knowing what humanity is scraping their fingers along as they explore. flying at night and having more to think about than just his destination and the aircraft’s parameters or current performance. he knows that by heart. but the stars? that’s something else. knowing that he is made of stardust, and so is everyone else.

farah karim

musical theater. a story told through music, characters moving around stage, the different sets. the casts cycling through, the original recordings and covers and the sound of projecting voices echoing through the theater. the curtain calls, sound design, lights and tech crew. makeup and quick changes - over a dozen art forms coming together to create a single product.

kate laswell

making her own tea blends. taking care of plants to dry them in the sun when they’re ready, always leaving some for later. testing out what goes well with what, sharing the ones that taste the best with her wife. using natural medicinal properties for nausea, for headaches, dealing with cramps when they get bad. customizing teas to make the people she meets a tea that’s unique to that experience, every time.

rodolfo

archeology. seeing how people lived all those years ago, how humanity has progressed. ancient acts of kindness - the disabled living long lives, babies buried with the best that could be offered, pets being laid to rest with their owners, tombs telling stories about the people’s lives, gravestones showing how loved the individuals were. what daily life looked like what must have been forever ago. knowing that there will be kindness and love and war and good and bad and victories and everything that makes humanity what it is, for as long as humans have their feet on the ground.

alejandro vargas

marine science. the vastness of it all - the depth of the ocean and the strength of the currents. the diversity of life and how much such a simple substance, just water, does for the entire earth. the different terms, and especially coral reefs. how a formation worn away by time and current and sun and tides has become a central place of life and support for so many creatures. how colorful they are, how delicate, now beautiful and so incredibly necessary they are. how much there is to love about the planet he lives on.

philip graves

urban exploration. seeing everything that’s been left behind, abandoned by the people who were there before. admiring how nature has taken back these man-made structures, the wear and tear, the animals that call those places home, even if they were never meant to be there. the echoing of footsteps and voices, the light filtering through cracks in the ceiling. ivy and sunlight and dust, serenity and silence in a once bustling thing.

385 notes · View notes