#posting only for the zen part | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

onlinekitsune · 1 year

Text

winter dates! mysmes edition! ʕ⁎̯͡⁎ʔ༄

i already did this with the obey me boys, but wanted to give something to my mysmes lovers (me) i hope you enjoy!! including saeran bc i don’t wanna leave him out

JAEHEE ; she’d definitely close the cafe just to spend the entire day with you, she’d even make sure her phones put aside just so you’d have her whole attention, she’d make you the best coffee you’d ever had (not surprising since she’s such a good barista), you two would end up cuddled up on the couch bingeing movies (ofc some staring zen himself), she’d lovingly rant about the production while you gazed at how bright she was when she talked about it

JUMIN ; him ditching work just to be with you? absolutely, sorry but he’s definitely feeling under the weather and the cure is decorating the penthouse, he’d pick you up just so you were able to put decorations as high as you wanted, decorating the tree was absolutely chaos with elizabeth, she’d steal and toss all the ornaments (cat safe ones), before the day was over jumin surprised you with a little gift of his own, he booked a winter photoshoot with you and elizabeth, you took silly cheesy photos for your holiday cards

SAERAN ; he never had a good holiday, actually he never really celebrated one, you decided to change that and over a course of a week show him various winter activities and such, you made snowmen, you looked at christmas lights together, you even decorated your own tree with him, he was a little timid about it all but warmed up, one night while you were in his arms he’d tell you how much he appreciated you remaking memories with him

SAEYOUNG ; winter made the excuse of being a homebody with you way more excusable, driving in snow was dangerous, and he’d rather spend the day with you anyways, you’d use this as an excuse for being little lazy and just lounging around, looking at silly cat videos with saeyoung on the couch, you’d also make cookies with him, which ends with a little chaos, he’d throw a little bit of flour on you and you’d chase him around the counter

YOOSUNG ; he loved christmas, but spending christmas with you?? absolutely perfect, he’d want to do all the cutesy couple things, take seasonal pictures, watch the christmas lights together, he’d also plan very hard to make sure he’d got you the perfect gift, he struggled with keeping it a secret from you because he’s just so excited to make you happy, on christmas day he’d make breakfast in bed before handing you your present right away

ZEN ; zen was absoutely determinded to make this holiday one you wouldn’t forget, it wasn’t enough to just spend it casually, he had to be the best holiday date you’ve had, and when he saw the ice rink he couldn’t think of anything more romantic, you on the other hand... were a little nervous to say the least, but you trusted him, he was very athletic and probably tried out for a ice skating role once before, to no one’s surprise he was really good, he’d confidently show you his talents before dragging you onto the ice, catching everyones attention from how good he was, to your surprise it was oddly romantic, he made sure you were alright and catched you a couple times, a stray paparazzi actually caught the moment he did, but respected your privacy thankfully

198 notes · View notes

sapphiresterreart · 9 months

Text

Inspired by this post: where Shadow finds Super Sonic and ONLY Super Sonic attractive. Sonic's normal self is not wanted.

It made me cackle because I couldn't help but picture Shadow deciding to explore this gay awakening in the most convoluted way possible. Cue me getting carried away with the idea and scribbling a rough scene.

Stuffed under the Read More.

At one point after seeing Sonic's glow-up into Super a few times, Shadow's brain latches onto an idea and goes insane until he scratches the metaphorical itch.

He zooms around the entire planet to collect the 7 Chaos Emeralds AND the maximum amount of rings a single person can hold.

Randomly shows up at Tails’ workshop/house one day, looking particularly deranged to the poor fox because the guy's spent the past month running himself ragged and is now gunning for his older brother for some unfathomable reason. Eggman couldn’t possibly have recovered from the last beat down in such short time! Something’s clearly wrong.

Shadow’s carefully manicured quills are in utter disarray. Gunk and grease coat his muzzle. Gloves notably tattered and inhibitor rings tarnished. There’s a suspicious smearing of red all over his typically immaculate chest fluff. Worst of it all are his eyes: near feral in their intensity as they pin the fox in his computer chair from afar.

The surly hedgehog snarls. “Where’s Sonic?”

All the while, Shadow has to keep ahold of the seven emeralds that prolly act like magnets and want to repel away from each other. His sanity’s hanging on a thread.

Luckily Sonic shows up soon (instead of late? First time for everything! What a relief) after a brief, albeit frantic call from his lil bro.

Sonic does not expect Shadow to look like such a wreck. He does not expect his usually composed rival to yank an absurd amount of rings from the pocket dimension everyone had in their feathers, fur, or otherwise back part of their body. He does not expect those same rings to be shoved into his hands and quills, forcibly stuffing them into his own ‘inventory’ of a pocket dimension.

He does not expect the rings to keep coming until he can’t hold anymore.

He does not expect the Seven Chaos Emeralds to immediately follow after.

“Shad–” Sonic tries, absolutely baffled.

“Transform.” Shadow gives him nothing except a haggard sort of desperation. “Now.”

And. Well. When asked like that? Damn. He won’t say no but that’s some voice his rival has on him. Hmm. Still. He doesn’t go super just yet because there’s only so long a transformation can last and he’d like some of the facts first. Especially if the situation’s as dire as Shadow’s making it out to be.

“What’s up?” He tosses out a tense smirk and a quip to lighten the mood. “Got yourself in trouble with the law again, Shads? Need me to use your own money to bail–“

“Transform.” Shadow staggers and oh no he’s gonna pass out isn’t he? He straightens before he can truly fall.

Sonic lets the smirk fall. This is too unusual. “Not until you tell me what’s going on! What the heck Shadow?”

The glare intensifies. He looks weirdly… hungry? Oh. He hopes that's not some alien DNA comin’ out to play. Sonic’s not in the mood to be eaten. At least… not in the way his shoot-first-questions-later friend would likely consider.

“…Transform first and then I’ll tell you.”

What an oh-so generous counter-offer. Sonic’s tempted to refuse on principle but the guy looks ready to collapse and there’s only so long Sonic himself can hold all seven emeralds at once before they launch outta his grip.

He sighs. “Yeah, alright.”

Sonic closes his eyes. Concentrates. Feels the power humming in the gems, lets them push away from him with him as their center of gravity to orbit. Momentum builds as they whirl around him. His focus deepens. A zen sort of calm settles over him like a familiar cloak as he pulls the gems back into his core sense of being. A spark ignites and he’s set aflame.

His feet leave the floor as the power repels him against the planet. Feels the gems thrumming alongside his veins as he opens his eyes. The world glitters a beautiful gold but he doesn’t have time to smell the roses. Rings are burning like a candlestick’s wick, after all.

“Start talking.”

Shadow does not start talking. Instead he stares. Only stares. It’s… kind of concerning, actually.

“Shadow?” Super Sonic frowns, spending more energy concentrating on maintaining the sheer power humming in his soul than on coming up with a funny joke. “Are you alright?”

Shadow doesn’t make a sound. Is he even breathing? Super Sonic’s brow furrows and gently glides from near the ceiling to hover in front of his rival. Red eyes track the movement like a predator intent on its prey but Super’s not worried about that. Not right now, at least.

Keeping his expression soft, yet unwittingly focused, Super examines his rival’s disheveled state. For the Ultimate Lifeform, he looks ultimately wrecked. He smirks, just a lil, and Shadow hones in on it like a laser beam. Super blinks, smirk twisting into a puzzled smile as he tilts his head, before slowly grasping Shadow by the shoulder.

“C’mon focus, Shadow. You with me?” Wide, red eyes blink dumbly and Super huffs a laugh. “How can I help?”

Shadow. Doesn’t respond. Merely gapes at him like he’s drinking in the sight. It’d be flattering at any other time but right now it’s just frustrating.

“I can’t help if you don’t tell me what’s goin’ on. On a time limit here–“

“You have full inventory.”

Finally! He speaks! But lacks sense. “What?”

“Rings.” Shadows answers though that doesn’t answer much. Choosing instead to fall silent once more and continue staring.

Super doesn’t know what to do with any of this so he turns to someone who might. “Tails? Any clues?”

“N-no…” His lil bro trots over to them, visibly disturbed. Good. Glad he’s not the only one confused here.

“I’m burnin’ rings.” Super settles for instead. “Thought you said it was urgent?”

“I thought it was.” Tails gestures at the catatonic state of their friend. “I mean look at him! What was I supposed to say?”

“Well.” Super starts strong only to trail off.

He pivots in the air, still hovering in front them both. Cups his chin with a thoughtful frown. Absently skims the cluttered workshop as he slowly spins in place before re-centering with a shrug. It’s surprisingly hard to keep focus and maintain the super form when there’s no imminent threat. Without anything to go on, he's just wasting power. So. His gaze returns to his battered rival.

“If nothing else I could try this?”

He drifts closer to the still stunned speechless ‘hog. Frowns slightly at the white part of Shadow’s eyes. They’d reddened significantly. Had he blinked once in the past minute or two? Nothing worth worrying over, he supposed. Not if this worked.

Super reaches a hand, still glowing a vibrant gold and soft flames of light emanating off him, and gently braces a palm against the side of Shadow’s face. Shadow doesn’t even move as Super closes his eyes.

Tails shifts beside them. “Try what?”

Super hums. “We’ll see if it works first, buddy.”

The sound vibrates in his chest and makes its way down the arm connecting him to his rival. The rings are burning slower than usual but once he starts this, they start burning like they would in battle.

Super focuses the gem’s energy from their raw state of chaotic power into something he can channel into another person. He smoothes corrosive edges, softens acidic potency, gentles the sheer intensity of it all and funnels them through his own energy. Pours bits of his own chaos mixed with the gem’s through that funnel in his palm. Pushes it from there into Shadow’s own energy.

Shadow doesn’t do anything more than gasp sharply and let him do his thing. Super mentally shrugs, privately delighted by the fact Shadow was letting him touch him at all especially his face, and continues his foray into healing via chaos energy.

The rings are gone even faster than in battle and soon after the last wound has closed and Super’s pulled away, the power keeping him aloft drains completely. The golden glow fades from his quills and they drop back into blue as he returns to the ground, his normal self once again. His grasp on the chaos emeralds slacken and the tension that had been building between the seven finally releases. The gems launch themselves harmlessly out of him like a slingshot and scatter once more.

He bounces a step from the residue energy crackling inside him and beams at his rival. “So now that that’s over with, mind telling us why you came all this way looking like you crawled outta a dumpster caught on fire?”

That of all things has Shadow snapping back to himself. Any awe lingering in his rival’s face vanishes. Fully returns to his normally composed self as he straightens and crosses his arms with a muted huff.

“Merely an experiment. Good day.” Whirls on a heel with shoes revving, dips his head in what might’ve been a polite farewell at his lil bro. “Prower.”

And leaves. He leaves. The cryptic jerk leaves.

Sonic gawks. “Whuh–? What was that?” He spins to face his brother. “Did you see that? Did you see?”

“I saw.”

“Didn’t even say goodbye to me! Me! He was the one who asked me to come all this way! I was next in line for brainiac dogs over in Spagonia, you know. Not as good as chili dogs but it was buy one get one free day! What the heck?”

His younger brother can only shrug helplessly with a puzzled smile, twin tails swishing behind him. “Don’t know, big bro. He did say it was an experiment.”

“Experiment in driving me insane, maybe! Now I’m gonna go crazy trying to figure him out.”

“You mean you weren’t already?”

“Tails!” He grins and hooks an arm around his annoyingly adorable baby bro. “I’ll show you who’s crazy!”

His bro only laughs and swats at the fist digging into his hair. Futilely fighting against the inevitable noogie but he's got him secured by the shoulders. “Have mercy! I’m not the one who spent the past month looking for seven whole emeralds and an entire inventory’s worth of rings.”

“I’ll give ya that!” Sonic cackles and lets him free. “What was up with that anyway?”

Elsewhere, unbeknownst to the brothers, one Shadow the Hedgehog was having a crisis of epic proportions. He had discovered a new, albeit incredibly difficult goal in life: to have Sonic turn Super more often than not because wow did he look alluring with a face of focused intensity framed by golden hues.

#Sonadow #Sonic the Hedgehog #Shadow the Hedgehog #Super Sonic #Fanfic #Sonic

328 notes · View notes

annbourbon · 6 months

Text

Mystic Messenger Timeline (Explained)

I'll be obviously skipping a lot of stuff in between, but this is just to make things clear. It's not the way you're supposed to play, just the timeline.

⚠️ Contains Spoilers ⚠️

⚠️⚠️ Spoilers ahead ⚠️⚠️

⚠️⚠️ You've been warned ⚠️⚠️

First Rika Behind the Story (DLC)

Then I'll start counting as Year 1, the events that lead to the RFA and Mint Eye foundation.

Year 1:

V and Rika know each other

They meet Saeyoung

Saeyoung leaves

Rika kills the Twins's mom

Rika gets engaged to V

Mika and Rika (Mina) create 1st draft of Mint Eye

V buys the department

*on that note, seems that there are 4 cameras but Saeyoung only knows of one*

**This also implies that Saeran was abused as soon as V and Saeyoung took their eyes off of him since Rika used Saeran as model to defeat Saeyoung's skills as a hacker.

***What happens because neither Saeyoung nor V know anything about Saeran whenever they reunite for RFA parties and their engagement? Why no one asked anything?

Year 2:

Rika meets Jumin

RFA begins (yes, it was Mint Eye first, and the reason why the name was Magenta first. Mika?)

RFA 1st party is held

Jaehee joins RFA

Rika kills Sally

RFA 2nd party is held

According to V and Saeyoung this is where the hacker starts attacking the RFA (first time)

Rika blinds V

Saeyoung installed the Special System. AKA: The Bomb

Plot holes: Where's Mika? Why they don't notice there's another person living there? It's not that easy to hide your presence 💀

But according to V, he knew about Mika. It's at least implied.

10. According to several chats during Yoosung route, they barely paid attention to V being blinded. This of course included Zen, Yoosung, and Jumin (who is worried and suspects something but doesn't intervene despite V having severe corneal damage from external trauma)

11. There's a point where Jumin admits barely seeing Rika after the 2nd party. Meeting with her and V for the last time 3 months before her death. Yoosung Route. Day 9. Chat room 7AM called V's eyes.

*At the same time, there's a line, I forgot where exactly, that says that both, Rika and V called off their engagement at some point. They don't say anything about coming back together after that. wtf!?*

12. "Rika commits suicide"

Another Story

1 month after her death, prologue.

Five months later

*means 4 months after they break up their engagement? Assuming they did not break up before but because of Rika behavior blinding him. Which kind of solves the plot holes from Year 1 setting Mika on the apartment and V not fully knowing but suspecting, although it would be impossible or almost impossible without his eyes do something about it. Especially since his blindness is recent. If you need to understand a bit more about blindness watch my post on Rika killing Sally. It may be a dog, unlike V lol but it's still enough information to set up the rest of the story.

Anyways, let's go back to our timeline no?

Bad ending prologue #1 (Casual & Deep) and #2 (Another) are part of the same story and unlikely that it is set into an *alternative route* like some people like to say. Bad ending prologues even from Another Story seem to fit almost too perfectly when you think about it, but only if you agree to go with Unknown after rejecting him several times.

Because it would fit into the idea that the MC's were captured by the cult and discarded after a while (or put to work under Mint Eye. But also because according to the opening on the Casual and Deep, it would mean that Saeran's been watching you, so does Saeyoung.)

As I said before, the other MC's are either dead or anything but MIA (whatever that means for Mint Eye?) and this one, the brunette, is selected and it's the only one who survives and passed the whole trial. Not at first but it doesn't matter. This MC is not dead. The others are. You think "The others" are just the player with different image? I've got news for you, each one of this has a number~ check this post ^^

Either you become the assistant of Unknown with that bad ending which is an option available for every prologue or you enter Day 1 to Day 4 of Another Story and play throughout to reach:

Day 6 and Day 10 from Ray/Saeran Route which are part of the same ending. They're not a different ending. Both however lead to the Casual Route, Day 1 (after the prologue)

Which means, if you get the bad ending in the prologue of Casual/Deep you'll be going back to Mint Eye. Yes. It's not supposed to be your first rodeo there. And if you have a Bad Ending on Mint Eye, you're brainwashed andd set on Casual/Deep (You're supposed to be an spy, but who do you work for? Are you a victim or a villainess? that's another story 😜)

My theory?

*This is where I'm still stuck, so I'll be fixing major plots here and there and editing this same post over and over until I get it right. Please bear with me 😭*

Rika DLC > 1st party > Rika gets engaged > Saeyoung leaves > Rika kills Sally > Rika kills Saeran's mom > Rika starts torturing Saeran > Mint Eye begins > 2nd party > Hacker attack > Bomb is installed > Rika blinds V > Rika dies > Another Story (prologue) > Another Story (Day 1 to 4) > Another Story (Day 6 & 10, bad relationship both of them) obviously with what causes these bad endings > Casual Route (with bad endings included) > Deep Story (with bad endings included) > Secret Endings (except for V dying, we'll get there) > Another Story again but V route happens first (no happy or normal ending) and then something weird happens:

And this part if I'm being honest, I have no idea but I'm fixing it cause my theory is that

V and Saeran's route become so intertwined that is almost impossible to know what happened.

The bomb on Mint Eye? Saeran? Although it is suggesting in the bad endings that he died, we never saw that to happen.

V dying in the secret endings?

Saeran burn?

Seven does mention a couple of numbers, associated with the other MCs, somewhere in the game. Unfortunately I can't remember if it's on a call or a chat so I'm going back all over again because I was so shocked at the time I was unable to take a screenshot.

Truth to be said I can't fully find the order rn but! I will, I definitely will. I need time. I mean, more time. I've been working on this for 6 to 7 years now, I'm posting this because it's so big I can't keep it to myself and I'm freaking out here. So I'll be editing this in the future. As many of my other posts. Sorry lol

Ironically, Saeran's AE would be indeed the Final Ending.

97 notes · View notes

olderthannetfic · 3 months

Note

https://olderthannetfic.tumblr.com/post/740412128006225920/my-fave-backwards-ass-thing-that-constantly#notes

There's this one joke I see often mentioned, this one is specific to white people, and honestly it was a bit funny the first time. "White people colonised the word to get spices, only to not do anything with them." Like I said, it was a bit funny the first time. But it kinda became more eyebrow raising when I noticed how many people unironically said it, and apparently have genuinely no clue why "white people" suddenly stopped focusing on spices. I mean, we better not look at any part of southern Europe, but moving on.

You know. Why did white people colonised the world for spices, but then people stopped using them? It's almost like there's a reason for it. A very specific reason. A very important HISTORICAL reason. An important reason why spices became less used, especially by the peasantry. A reason that could explain why food would suddenly be less about indulging in flavor, and more about just being able to eat at all. Something like a food scarcity suddenly reaching an all time high and trade becoming a lot more dangerous. A VERY significant thing that happened in WORLD history. Something that became even deadlier with the industrial revolution. Something that made it so that most modes of transportation which previously had been used to get food from one place to the other became a lot less accessible and also a lot more dangerous. Anyone? Got some answers? And honestly, I find that anyone who judges food in such a way to be incredibly obnoxious. Different countries, cultures, and people have different flavor profiles. Some rely on spices, some on herbs, some on fats, some on vegetables, or even just on bringing out each ingredients own flavor, some are even just more focused on survival. Food is dependent on geography and what's available, and some palates prefer certain tastes. The closer you get to the arctic circle the less you will be able to add to the food because the most available food is literary animal protein, with import prices being absolutely insane.

Making a bit of light fun of different foods isn't the issue, it's the stupid maliciousness about it that's obnoxious. Putting your culinary culture above others boorish and just insanely childish in a globalized world. I honestly have a huge dislike for anyone who needs to mock and act all snooty about other cultural foods. Just because you are too afraid to widen your culinary horizons, doesn't mean you have to show everyone what a little baby you are.

Signed -A foodie.

Frankly, people are also stupid af about the basic principles of aesthetics and showing off. The pendulum swings between "I can get bling and you can't" and "Everyone can get everything, but no one can buy taste"/"Quality of the materials is what matters, not fanciness of preparation".

On one end, we have Medieval European food and gem-encrusted things, on the other, the French culinary revolution and all beige homes.

Ancient Rome has aesthetics treatises on this. China has experienced this back and forth. Heian Japan was into modern tacky bling, while zen shit is firmly Team Greige.

It's a basic feature of how aesthetic trends work.

58 notes · View notes

lotusmi · 1 year

Note

uhhh neville did talk abt the void state as the I am state. the void state is just the nickname to it. check @zen-shu s post to it. don't assume we don't even know what it is & ur experience does not change that ur pure consciousness aka the I am state is the sane pure consciousness as the void

ok, here we go then...

I got many people asking me why I said that I AM State is different from Void, I never really made a post about it since I did not wanted people to overthink by thinking they can enter 'I AM State' by "accident" while wanting to tap into the void, which is not possible, since the difference is in the intention, not in the affirmation "I AM..." that can be used to tap in both experiences. ♡ I know other bloggers don't agree with me in this topic, yet a experience is a experience. I don't feel 'upset' with it, I still appreciate them so much and it is okay if you don't agree with me.

I AM x VOID

"the I am state is the sane pure consciousness as the void" This is obvious, since there's not 2 consciousness. "Imagination is God, and there is no other God! His name is "I AM" forever and forever." I AM is the name of God, I AM is, actually, not a state. Nor is the void.

A state is what you identify as being or having. States are temporary, I AM is forever. States are not permanent, but I AM is. "A state is simply an attitude of mind, a body of belief, a phase of experience." “There are an infinite number of states. The state of health, the state of being unknown, all are only states and everyone is always in a state.” We are at many and many states right now. But we are ALWAYS I AM. And the void is always, nothingless. That's why I don't really like to call those experiences 'states'.

☯︎ I like to see I AM and VOID as yin yang. Creation is made by opposition. Hot and cold, good and evil, WHOLENESS AND NOTHINGLESS. Consciousness can experiment both.

+ "ur experience does not change that ur pure consciousness" I never said that.

Before reading about the void, I had read At Your Command by Neville. So I tried to do it, and it was exactly as most of experiences people had 3, 4 years ago, before 'void' being a 'method' to ''get desires instantly''. Neville Goddard students had experienced the same I did.

I closed my eyes and started repeating "I am.. I am" and I got numb, then I felt like I was everything, saw my city from the sky (it was not a astral travel), then I felt like I was the trees, the world, other people, I saw the Gold Melting and then I saw myself in the body of my sp, we had fighted some weeks before, and I felt he was sorry and saw him apologizing, I understood "everyone is you pushed out" that day. Then I really entered the state of being forgiven, as Neville said, it's simple to enter a state when you know you are all the states. When I left, I got a text from my sp, saying he was sorry and missed me.

I had others I AM experiences where I felt like being every part of creation, feeling myself being them and all of that. The last was last year, I shared one with Vesora. (ignore the grammar)

A lot of people said to me "this is just what you experienced, it's some random thing." well but it was not only me, here I linked lot's of I AM experiences from NevilleGoddard/reddit. Most of them were posted way before of void being know as this 'magical method'. They did what Neville Goddard said, this was the "I AM" meditation. Am I saying the void did not existed back then? No! The void always existed, but it was not knew as a "manifesting tool" as it now is. And it was not knew this way (we now know) by the old Law of Assumption community. They believed they could change their states using 'I am technique', but they thought they would have to wait a "bridge of incidents", and that the desire would not be manifested instantly. Then here we found the difference.

+Golden Melting experiences commented by Neville (you can skip if you want): "A bolt of lightning splits man in two from the top of his skull to the base of his spine. He is cleft as though he were a tree that had been struck by lightening. at the base of his severed body he sees “the blood of Jesus”, a pool of molten gold; he knows it is himself; then fusing with “the blood of Jesus” he ascends his severed spine in a serpentine motion into his skull. This is to fulfil the Scripture; “This Son of Man must be lifted up as the serpent was lifted up by Moses in the wilderness” (John 3:14)." - Neville Goddard (from He breaks the Shell)

"I was sitting in the Silence, not thinking of anything in particular, just simply contemplating this interior structure of the brain as it were. If you turn your eyes, mentally turn them inward and just let them rest upon the interior of your skull, in a little while all these dark convolutions of the brain grow luminous and they fascinate you. The whole thing becomes liquid and golden liquid light. So while watching this wonderful golden liquid light, suddenly out of the nowhere came a stone, a rock. There’s nothing more sterile, nothing more opaque, nothing more contracted as far as imagery is concerned than a rock. So here was a rock, this quartz. As I looked at it, just simply looking at it, not wondering why it’s before me, but there it is before me, and suddenly it became fragmented, broken into unnumbered pieces. Then all these little pieces were gathered together, but not re-formed into the rock (the original form) but into a human shape. And here it takes human form. Here, I am seeing a man seated in the lotus posture. I became intrigued. As I looked closer, I’m looking at myself. I am the being that I’m contemplating. Here he is seated in the lotus posture and just the very image of the being I knew myself to be. As I looked at him, he began to glow and he increased in luminosity until he reached the limit of intensity, and then he exploded. Then I returned to this level with only the memory of what I had experienced." - Neville (He Is Meditating Me)

"your whole body is split from top to bottom, revealing blood…but the blood is living, golden, liquid light. As you look at it, you not only know it is yourself, but you know it is the Creator and Redeemer…and yet you know it is yourself (Blake, Jer., Plt.96)." - Neville (Everyone Has the Plan in Him)

"you see the golden liquid light that is truly life itself" - Neville (What Must We Do? Believe!)

"At the base of the spine is a pool of golden living liquid light, and as I looked at it I knew it was myself. Here I am a pool of living liquid light" - Neville (Imagination’s Power)

"When you go into the Silence and you see this golden liquid light that moves and moves and moves all through the brain." - Neville (Remembrance of Things Future)

Another topic, most important one for me, is that I AM was knew as this experience where you discover/FEEL you are God, that the world is within you, that everyone is you pushed out. Not as only a tool to "change the world", but as a way to understand YOU are the world and the world comes from you. Then you stop desiring, since you know there's nothing to create, but to accept. Accept that creation is finished, and it is all coming from us. So we don't have to change the world, but change SELF with the knowing we ARE GOD.

The void obsession comes when you think that in order to have what you want, you think you need to access something outside of you, "God power", you have to do something, you have to do a method, you need to tap into the void, etc. But you forget, you ALREADY are God. You focus in 3d and you think "I have to change it". But you don't have to change nothing in the outside, you have to change SELF. And repeating/feeling I AM, which first was a beautiful way Neville taught of understanding you are God, a way to free yourself, "be still and know I am God", turned into a 'hype', a 'escape', a obsession, something that people think they need to somehow enter so that they can change their world, they forget that there's no way to change the world since all you can change is SELF, and that Self, is GOD.

So, at least for me, those are the meaning of the names we are used to think are synonym of "void", based in what they meant in the past:

ps: yes, I know void, God and I AM WORDS have the same meaning of "Conciousness, awareness, mind". But the meaning the community gave to each of them in terms of the name of the different experiences, mean different things.

God State:

"The god state is when you know that you are creating, you know that everything that you desire is coming to you [is already yours!!]. It’s a state where you have full trust that you are manifesting your life.

Being in the god state feels effortless, you know that everything is responding to your thoughts and assumptions."

I AM (as a meditation/experience):

A experience where you feel yourself to be all. Wholeness, everything, everyone. Gold melting. The nature, the animals, you get visions, you almost feel overwhelmed by the knowing nothing exists without being part of you.

VOID:

"When he attains the state of void, all thoughts cease for then pure Thought thinks itself alone." Stillness, emptiness, blackness, nothingless. You don't feel nor see nothing. Know as method to manifest instantly or shift.

+ Can I accidentaly experience one of those? No. If you want to enter THE VOID, you have the intention, you are naturally expecting to 'enter' the void, so you will enter the void.

Again, you don't have to agree with me. But I guess I had included great evidence that sustain my arguments, so that's the post, my views on it.

✩ I see I AM and VOID as WORDS to represent what it is to be/feel God aware of the whole creation, and be/feel God aware of the nothingless the creation was made of.

#I AM state #i am state #void state #the void #god state #neville goddard

287 notes · View notes

not-poignant · 29 days

Note

Im really sorry if this is too personal please ignore me if it is but i saw your post just at the right time and im just, im struggling in my twenties at the thought of possibly having did right now. And you say you "used to", can i ask how you healed?

A lot of therapy, anon.

It does tend to show up in someone's 20s, and I went the path of Internal Family Systems Therapy (also known as IFS or IFST) which is extremely useful alongside the three C's (Compassion, Communication, Co-Consciousness).

I wasn't aiming to eliminate any alters, and anyone who wanted to stay as a separate alter could, but I taught myself through the help of other/s to be self-compassionate, to open up opportunities and methods for communication (which also included art, writing, journalling, etc. in fact the very first tumblr that 'I' ever made was actually made by an alter, and was originally called artforartists - it's now renamed and run by 'me' because Dani has absorbed back into the system, but you can still go to the earliest entries and see her in them.

It took a few years and I didn't rush things. The main thing to know is that while it feels extreme, it usually comes about as a reasonable response to an unreasonable situation, and it usually becomes very manageable with self-compassion (to all yourselves), impartial judgement, open communication, compromise (i.e. if you have an alter that wants to play video games 24/7 to the point that you're losing weeks of memory, find out small areas of compromise where they can be given something in exchange for something), and sharing consciousness where possible (co-consciousness).

It's very scary at first but imho for me personally, it has been the 'easiest' of all of my diagnosed disorders to deal with. I still have severe treatment-resistant depression and I still have severe treatment-resistant PTSD/C-PTSD, but my DID went into remission after about 4 targeted years of therapy. It's now DDNOS (Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified) which means I don't have the symptoms enough to qualify for DID anymore, but I still have a system prone to dissociation / derealisation / depersonalisation and I have days where some alters are fronting a bit more than the central self, but I usually just use it as a sign that I'm really stressed and overwhelmed, rather than a sign that there's something wrong with me.

I'm extremely zen about it, tbh. And look, I didn't have the goal of 'absorbing' my alters (or them dying or w/e), I didn't set out with the idea of getting rid of it so much as learning how to live with different people who have different opinions about things in my head. But through the course of IFST and giving everyone a voice, that started to happen anyway. Healing doesn't always mean 'getting rid of alters' it mostly just means getting a handle on the memory loss (which is the most severe part of the disorder for me) and the polarisation so that it becomes regular dissonance and not so distressing it causes someone to switch. A person can be fully healed from DID and still have alters that front, if there's co-consciousness and communication for example. This was actually what I was aiming for, it just didn't end up being my outcome.

You may not be able to access therapy or IFST, and it can be hard to find DID-friendly therapists who know what they're doing, but you can actually look up and explore IFST on places like Instagram and in books like No Bad Parts and start doing the work gently already. (IFST isn't just or only for DID patients, but it is uniquely very well suited to them).

It can be very scary at first, anon, to think you might have this. Because it's a highly stigmatised and misunderstood disorder. At its root it can be understood as 'a child who didn't understand how to cope with something, at the time of personality formation, just developed a new personality to deal with it. But as a result of this, their brain got so good at developing new personalities that it became a maladapted coping strategy, and as an adult they can learn ways to cope that aren't splitting, switching, or losing memory with compassion and self-understanding.'

And honestly we all have a lot of maladapted coping mechanisms and the whole journey of life is learning to unpack them, and repack some healthier coping mechanisms into the lunchbox. And that's really about it. Still very scary and upsetting to go through, but also not a mysterious, "insane" thing. <3333 If you can reach out for help, please consider it, but otherwise do look into IFST. I started working on those strategies long before I found a suitable therapist and I honestly feel like just the mindset of radical self-acceptance and self-compromise and self-compassion was - while extremely hard to do often - the key for me, and some of those things will at the very least be helpful for you.

#asks and answers #personal #there's a lot more resources now for DID than their used to be #but there's also a lot more self-exploitation for likes and clout #just admitting you're worried something dissociative might be going on #is very brave and you're already on the path to healing anon #even though it doesn't feel like it yet

35 notes · View notes

colemorrison · 1 month

Text

Zenyatta watched you as you held onto him, Ramattra's thrusts just getting harder and faster, the monk was amazed at the sight of both of you.

"Is this what you two do while I am away?"

"Only so often, human's tend to run out of stamina quicker but that is exactly why we are doing this. Strengthen their stamina and we can go longer."

The shorter nodded, metal fingers gliding over your warm face, the cold metal felt nice but it didn't help your focus, Ramattra was ruthless as he abused your body. Hands wandering and pinching, but they moved back down to your thighs when Zen's began to move.

"How does this feel?"

He asked as he pinched your nipples, abusing the poor buds even more than Ramattra already had.

"Keep going please.."

If it brought you pleasure and made you sound this way then how could they stop?

—

Warm water surrounded you, soft towels trailing down your skin, soothing the bruises.

"This remains my favourite part."

"She looks wonderful like this.."

"She always looks wonderful brother."

————

This is the last one, my entire blog is literally all posts for you. <3 @ya-zz

#overwatch2 #overwatch #overwatch imagines #overwatch 2 #ramattra #ow zenyatta #tekhartha zenyatta #zenyatta tekhartha #for ya-zz!!#cole’s drabbles

38 notes · View notes

zytes · 1 month

Note

Question from someone just starting with creating and then posting art to Tumblr, do you think I should be watermarking my pieces?

I’ve always disliked watermarks as they naturally tend to dissuade people from interacting with art in a natural manner; it depends very heavily on the size and placement of the mark, obviously. BUT, often times an artist will overzealously obscure their work with identification and it has a somewhat repulsive effect on the average viewer - a wall has been erected between the viewer and the art, in a sense. Watermarks, to me, exist to prevent very specific situations from unfolding with your work - almost all of those reasons seem to be financially motivated, like preventing strangers from printing your art out at home or reposting without attribution. Situations that could affect your ability to profit off of your work.

Admittedly, much of my perception about this issue was inspired by an article included in the book “Context” by Cory Doctorow, wherein he writes about how he’s benefitted from “thinking like a dandelion”, which is an idea that was inspired by conversation the author had with Neil Gaiman — I’ll try and summarize the parts of the point that are more relevant to visual arts; since portions of the allegory refer more specifically to certain qualities of written media.

He begins with, “Mammals worry about what happens to each and every one of their offspring, but dandelions only care that every crack in every sidewalk has dandelions growing out of it. The former is a good strategy for situations in which reproduction is expensive, but the latter works best when reproduction is practically free — as on the Internet.”

So how do you “think like a dandelion” then?

“Your work needs to be easily copied, to anywhere whence it might find its way into the right hands. That means that the nimble text-file, HTML file, and PDF (the preferred triumvirate of formats) should be distributed without formality — no logins, no e-mail address collections, and with a license that allows your fans to reproduce the work on their own in order to share it with more potential fans. Remember, copying is a cost-center — insisting that all copies must be downloaded from your site and only your site is insisting that you — and only you — will bear the cost of making those copies. Sure, having a single, central repository for your works makes it easier to count copies and figure out where they’re going, but remember: dandelions don’t keep track of their seeds. Once you get past the vanity of knowing exactly how many copies have been made, and find the zen of knowing that the copying will take care of itself, you’ll attain dandelionesque contentment.”

The rest of the allegory more specifically applies to written work, but I’ll link it here for the sake of posterity. Essentially: every wall or pre-requisite that you establish before allowing a fresh set of eyes to fall upon your work actually may deter people from engaging with the work and sharing it with others. Signatures, subtle watermarks that are “baked” into the work, or maybe like.. a well-placed QR code that links people back to you — all of those would be my suggestion for someone who wants to leave a lasting, linking thread between a given work and it’s artist. If the right person sees your art and connects with it, there SHOULD be a way for them to follow that thread back to you and discover more; but if you over-prioritize demonstrating ownership over your work, you’re likely to drive those coveted genuine connections away.

On the other hand, if your primary goal is to sell prints or other products, brazenly watermarking your work will protect your bottom line from the kind of low-level art-scraping that drives all those shady redbubble shops and etsy stores that sell stolen works on cheap t-shirts and hankies. For me, art is a primarily social interest in which I prioritize the sharing of culture and ideas. I don’t want financial factors to take precedence and alter how/why I created something; it feels like I’d have to take much of myself out of my art in order to make it palatable for consumer spaces.

You should determine your priorities and then strive to make art that fulfills those priorities without compromise. I think you’ll find that self-satisfaction manifests readily at different points in the midst of that process.

#my asks #hope this helps! I’m against watermarking my own stuff bc I’m not really concerned about someone trying to steal/sell my weirdo works #in spite of that: I’ve had several people ASK to buy stuff from me on occasion; I’m always glad to facilitate that personally #but yeah as a result I’m obviously not moving boxes of prints of anything #and this is what works for me right now - my mind may change on it later if my life and priorities change #it’s an everongoing process

20 notes · View notes

levmada · 8 months

Note

How do you think Levi would handle his PTSD/symptoms during post!war Marley days? Like he definitely takes up doing his tea shop and I bet gardening or painting maybe but moreso about small stuff like seeing something mundane and it just triggers him. Having tinnitus or really bad knee/hand pain, how does he cope in small ways? I could see him even take up hammocking and reading just listening to birds and chilling in nature.

Also, do you think that he ever misses using ODM gear? The easy gilding through trees and buildings, being able to almost like fly? There's this certain point where when you master a skill with such fluidity that it becomes a second nature. Do you think that he misses that zen feeling?

sheeppp i’m so so so sorry this took me literal months to reply to😭i hope it was worth it! i had so much to say,,,

so: post-war levi headcanons

//su1cidality (idk if it’s allowed to use The Whole Word or not), detailed ptsd descriptions, internalized ableism |

wc: ~2k

just like how keeping his promise only finally gave room for Levi to feel the grief surrounding Erwin’s death, the end of the Titans would be the same, but much worse. yes, the dream all the Scouts fought for—a world without walls and without Titans—was realized… but absolutely no one who Levi knew before discovering the basement was alive to see it with him. he's the only one left to remember all of it, especially the trauma, and that's the loneliest feeling in the world.

• despite ultimate victory, at an individual level, he'd feel... really lost, and broken of course. he can no longer walk, let alone fight for anything, but he doesn't have anything left to fight for anyway!! (Levi definitely considers his duty completed, not having a part in what the former 104th is doing.)

so the first year would be very very very hard on him. assumably he was inpatient in a hospital for sometime for his injuries and mandatory physical therapy, and after that he realistically can’t live on his own (hence Gabi and Falco).

but,, Levi would have a hard time accepting being taken care of just on principle. the loneliness would be crippling. with every bit of self worth he ever had being built on how useful he is, ironically i think the end of the war would put him at rock bottom for a time.

• this is not at all to mention his mental scarring in general. his convictions about his duty had been only as strong as his ability to suppress his weaknesses. the foundations of his life had been built on is always moving forward with no regrets, and that's just a breeding ground for suppressed grief and guilt. just because Levi lived by it didn't make it healthy for him in the long run, and now all the sudden he HAS no duty, and nothing to move forward past.

so now, what, three or four decades worth of issues?—have an opportunity to take root.

there are nightmares of course, the usual insomnia, and heaps of post-traumatic stress; coming to terms with how worthless he thought and thinks of himself, especially now; the frustration and hatred directed towards his new disabilities; but above all, his suppressed emotions.

he over-regulated his emotions for sooo long that it's become instinctive to mask around anyone so no one would have the slightest idea that he's struggling at all. in order to maintain his strength, doing his duty, his fighting ability, everything—that's what he did, and not only is he so damn good at it that he's deluded even himself into believing he’s infallible, but it's instinctive and automatic for him. and healing from a coping mechanism like that completely, surrounded by a sea of severe psychopathology, is nearly impossible.

he must have compartmentalized or blocked out many many events and traumatic memories, and of course, the more often you do that, the heavier the feelings, the more traumatic the memories, the bigger the breakdown later. at some point he has a breakdown and shatters to pieces worse than he has in his whole fucking life.

• he struggles to adjust to change (because as we know Levi never even wore the new uniforms in s4, implying that. along with an interview i vaguely remember confirming that), and desperately needs a routine.

• but despite his loneliness, or maybe because of it, he struggles with relationships. in his mind it's not like he became any more pleasant to be around than he was before, so he doesn’t feel like anyone could deal with or wants his company anyway, besides on obligation. so he would self-sabotage his relationships with Gabi, Falco, Onyakopon or whoever even at the cost of his physical health. Levi neverrrr gave a damn about his own well-being and that gets worse when he’s of no more “use” to anyone, with his existence now a “burden” to his friends. he's useful, or he's nothing.

AGAIN IN LIKE THE FIRST YEAR…

• do i think this at one point snowballed into suicidal ideation of sorts? of sorts. the guilt of not being completely happy, now that it's all over, is prevalent, on top of his worthlessness, on top of tinnitus+his affected vision+using his hands+his worse mobility+chronic pain,,, ironically for a time after the war, his hardest battle is surviving.

• he loathes psychotherapy at its very premise. delving into his feelings with someone who's basically a stranger paid to listen and analyze him?? one of his worst nightmares.

so that's out of the question. but physical therapy is doable for him. such as seeing it as an exercise routine, him disliking his wheelchair, and being given tangible goals to work towards—is good for him. and besides, with the technology and culture of Marley resembling 20th century western Europe/USA, i imagine there's very few resources and little empathy, and more discrimination for people with disabilities. it can't be helped, so he might as well work on physical therapy, and along the way grow a decent self-esteem around that, and his facial scars.

• he finds ways to cope somehow. Levi isn’t an artistic person and i don’t think that changes with retirement. but he enjoys reading fiction and the newspaper, as a distraction and to keep up with what’s going on in the world.

he would absolutely enjoy gardening. cultivating life instead of ending them, being self-sustaining food wise, just the reward of taking care of something living and watching it flourish. gardening is one of his favorite pastimes.

and, eventually, journaling. like i said, Levi would have trouble just accepting that his suffering is valid, let alone coping with it. there is no full recovery, there is no being completely okay for someone who's gone through all he has i think, which is incomprehensible to someone like Levi, who prioritized his strength over every other one of his attributes.

but eventually he gets it into his head (Onyankopon's advice?) that although his closest loved ones and friends are gone, he can’t let who they were be forgotten. yes people like Erwin and Hange would be icons in history, but it’s not enough. Levi is the only person who knows who they really were, and of course those people are very very very dear to him.

so he starts jotting down memories or anecdotes he almost forgot. it would sort of read as a police report or a debrief at first honestly, just a recounting of events with no emotion because it’s hard. memories of them, all of them, are priceless to him, so fond or not, it’s a challenge.

but it becomes therapeutic, and even a crutch. sometimes he writes so fast that he’s not even thinking of the words to put and just writing his stream of consciousness, or loses track of time. at times like that he can find some catharsis.

he enjoys sitting at a park bench (and knowing the importance of routine to Levi, the same one every time) and feeding the birds, and like you said, chilling in nature.

he decides he owes it to his past comrades to see the fruits of their labor they didn’t get to.

• Levi has fond memories of the past, before the basement and their whole world got bigger and more dire. there's something he appreciates about that time, and how simple their goals and enemies were, even though their lives were never carefree or happy. i think Levi would prefer that time of his life the most, being under the sun and sky and with a cause to live and fight for. his reason to live fixated on his duty, and so being a soldier became his reason for being.

and then there’s his pure love of flying on the ODM gear. he was doing it since before he ever even joined the survey corps. probably his first ever real belonging besides a knife, and his first and most longstanding sense of freedom he ever had. Levi never was carefree, but flying was as close as he got. yes. flying is one of the things he misses the most about the past.

• but like i said, and even though it's sad, i think that for someone like Levi and all he's been through, there is no complete peace. that's not realistic.

• his ptsd is severe. at times when the littlest thing could set him off—being irritated or angry—and he has no concrete reason for why. he doesn’t even know who or what he’s angry at. it’s tempting to resent the people around him for not understanding it, and how they’ll never understand what he went through that made him “broken”. being angry that he has to relive some memories through nightmares or flashbacks at seemingly mundane things.

he hates planes (sorry Onyankopon). he hates shower steam or cooking on a stove. sometimes his missing fingers reminds him of Erwin and all the worry that arose when he lost his arm. fireworks or the sounds of explosions in general make him feel dizzy and out of it for a while. he probably sees dead friends and enemies alike in crowds of people. he doesn’t stare into the fireplace because he’ll smell burning flesh. needles whenever he visits the doctor makes him feel panicky.

he has triggers. and when he’s triggered he self-isolates a lot and becomes emotionless. you know, sometimes his sole motivation for getting out of bed is taking care of his garden/his plants, and eating is only worth the strength needed to do that, or to eat so the food he grew himself doesn’t go to waste. besides, he reminds himself that staying in bed is pointless, because getting sleep is never easy.

• and arguably the worst part is, that Levi is so accustomed to suffering it’s unthinkable the type of person he’d be or life he could lead without it. it’s comfortable because it’s familiar, which leads to him almost fetishizing his own sadness out of a sense that he deserves it as punishment, and this carnal need to prove that he’s useless, and should be left alone.

• but of course, he’s too loved for that to happen. he comes to believe his friends of that. and that makes him protective of Gabi and Falco especially—he’s still that same person who will do anything to make his friends’ lives easier or take a load off whenever they need it.

time passing helps, and so does journaling and seeing the kids (Gabi, Falco, honestly the whole 104th is still his kids), but there is no full recovery for someone like Levi. then again, peace is uncomfortable for him anyway, someone whose whole life was a cycle of being on his guard, training and fighting, recovering, and then fighting some more.

but he does find some peace.

• eventually, when it’s finally over for him, the most prevalent feeling i think would be relief. being surrounded by friends or at least with the knowledge that he’s loved. he has lived a life of constant trial and tribulation, most of all grief, but it’s yet another testament to Levi’s strength that despite everything, he is still able to find a way to be happy. it’s the same. you can choose to feel better. every day, you find something to live for. it can be fleeting and easily forgotten… but maybe that’s everything.

as for him, he always holds onto the small things, for the same reason he needs those small things to hold on.

#sorry for getting sappy at the end #levi hc #levi ackerman headcanons #aot headcanons #levi fanfic #levi ackerman hcs #levi fanfiction #levi ackerman fanfiction #aot spoilers #snk spoilers

63 notes · View notes

moonshynecybin · 2 months

Note

Can't decide on a specific scene but i'll take anything you have to say about i'll meet judgement by the hounds bc at this point i have re-read it so many times ...

the thing about ill meet judgement by the hounds is that literally no concrete planning went into writing that thing. i was up against a deadline for a grad school assignment i was procrastinating like NOBODY'S BUSINESS had two panic attacks that week (unrelated to school!!) and then flew to bath with my roommate spur of the moment. posted that ch2 late at night zooted on my anxiety meds and and woke up to some LOVELY messages that i read on a bus when i was pulling away from the airport. insane experience. i didnt even want to give it a chapter two right away i was like IM BUSY. and then i wrote it immediately.

BUT to actually talk about the fic. like you asked <3. i actually had this idea that i wanted to follow marc's pov (at that point i had only written vale) and get inside his insane headspace leading up to his arm surgery and then be like. wouldnt it be crazy if vale was there and wanted to reconcile a bit but he was also kind of avoiding SAYING THAT. wouldnt that make marc feel EVEN CRAZIER. marc marquez saw trap simulator. inside you there are two wounds one is valentino rossi and the other is your fucked up arm. anddddd 2022 seemed like the ideal place for a rosquez reunion to me! like. dramaturgically. marc is on the brink. vale has just retired (easy to get a reason for him to have an epiphany regarding marc, made even easier bc marc pov means i never have to explain it in depth !)

and the thing about this fic is that it was supposed to be. A LOT longer. go race by race until his surgery and have them talk a lot more. change a little more gradually. but uh. ive already said my life was insane at that time and i got excited and fucking SENT that badboy. (again. i was lightly tranquilized.) which i think MOSTLY makes it better but the pacing is still little wacky. anyways i do think of the scene i cut where marc talks to alex all the time but i think i also fully deleted it! dont write fic under the influence! i also cut a BIG scene of them at the french GP where vale brings marc a sandwich and makes him eat it. it should also be noted that i was doing SO much journalism research about this period and i found a bunch of WILD quotes from marc that i compiled into a small insane vision board of them to ground my fic in his crazy way of conceptualizing his life. that i apparently also deleted while zen-ed out. so

more stupid behind the scenes under the cut

actual plot summary (my "outline") that i wrote out at the top of my google doc complete with typo:

Thinking about how absolutely distressing it would be for Marc pre surgery or right after if Vale tried to reconcile. Early 2022 before surgery decision and post Vale retirement

Scenes of Vale like. earnestl y talking to him. Marc represses a panic attack every time. race by race?

and here's what i had written for aragon, which is full of lines i just thought of with NO context or structure like this part would NOT take off the ground. you might notice some of them get repurposed later in the fic:

III. French GP, 2022. P6.

Marc’s still not out of the habit of reaching for him, apparently. He looks— God. Marc’s head hurts just looking at him. He could swear he has defenses from this, from how Marc can feel where he is in every room they’re in together. He guesses somewhere in the last few weeks he’s lost them, again. Just another thing he used to be good at.

despite everything, Marc can feel himself relax, with Vale here. The warm heat of him sharing space. He used to feel like this all the time. Vale to his left. His arm, casual and pain free, on his right. Now he's scarred all the way down both sides.

He remembers when he was a kid and he met Vale. How he had winked at Marc and said, I'll look out for you, cradling the toy car that Marc had brought specifically to give to him in his hands. How Marc had turned it over in his brain for years. I'll look out for you.

Marc bargains with himself

Marc does stupid, stupid things when Vale is in his life. He knows this. Going to the ranch is a bad idea. the press alone, if anyone finds out, would feed the paddock journos for years. It would be stupid— risky

Someone needs to tell him not to race. calm him down. Usually, it’s Álex.

MORE OUTLINE: Vale brings him a sandwich and Marc wants to cry, terrible race. They watch a movie its very Valentino voice lemme take care of you !!! but no talking about their past lmao. maybe arm

Genuinely terrible race. That one stat about alwasy finishing top 5 or crashing. Vale like actually gets him to talk about his arm which gets no where fast (guest alex?) and riding misery begins to reach a tipping point

#ALSO remember doing a lot of research NOT using ALL IN nad then going back when 3/4 of the fic was written to watch it #and all of my inferences about marcs feelings at specific races were pretty correct! and that felt good. like i had a bit of a handle on hi #also the working title of it was BODY KEEPING THE SCORE. i chose the actual title in a fugue state at midnight. its a mitski song.#motogp #callie speaks #asks #my fav part of that outline: maybe arm #like yeah idiot. the fic is about arm.

21 notes · View notes

marshmallowprotection · 9 months

Text

Mystic Messenger 7th Summer Event

I was on the money with my speculation. I was right on the money and there is nothing you guys can do to stop me from talking about this photo in its entirety. Oh, my God. I am frothing at the mouth at this very moment because Cheritz gave me everything I could have ever wanted in a photo.

It's Ray DRESSED as Unknown, and that is someone I never saw coming.

See, I have egg on my face because they said Ray in their post last night and I never thought they were going to throw this at me. That's because they've never done something like this before. Usually, when he is mislabeled, it's just one of those things that happen now and again because of marketing or trying to avoid spoilers, but in this case, they actually went out of their way to bamboozle me.

I never could have expected something like this. I am most definitely not complaining because this isn't something I didn't know I needed in my life. Unknown and Ray are my favorites so the fact that they are combined in this situation is sending me. I didn't know I needed this but I'm happy that I have it.

On that note, does anybody have commissions open because I need more Idol Ray in my life? I want my MC to be in the audience cheering him on with a penlight.

When I tell you guys I cried when I saw this, I am not kidding about that. I cried. There are a lot of reasons why I cried and we'll get into that in a second. First I think we need to appreciate this for what it is. I think this is the first time in a long time my speculation has been 100% accurate.

This photo is split into three different parts just as I expected it would be, Rika is trying to pedal the soda, and V is in his believer robes which I joked about because the color was accurate but I wasn't sure if they would actually go through with it, and Ray painted his fingernails and that's sending me to Heaven.

V cannot believe what he is seeing. Need I remind everybody in this fandom that his mother was a musician and knowing that fact makes this a hell of a lot funnier when you consider this was Rika's plot. I would not put it past her to have thought about using music as a ploy to mess with him, not only because it's something they shared with her love of Zen, but because she wants to use everything she has against V.

The context in this situation is amazing. I don't know if any of you have seen the new Twitter thread but I'm going to share it with you.

[Link]

When I tell you guys I screamed, I mean it. I screamed because Ray was so smug when he said he has a cute face. That was a lot of confidence in a short amount of time, and if he looked at me after saying that, I would have melted and done anything he told me to do. I mean, I would already do that in general, he knows what I am.

She literally decided out of the blue that she was just going to sell him out because he has a cute face. I mean, she's not wrong, but that's such a Rika thing to do. After all, it's not the first time she pushed him into being an idol.

So, what I'm going to say here is a little silly. I have to tell all of you the implication of what this photo means. This is Ray and he is dressed as Unknown. He has no means to be able to dress that way without us helping him.

That means the MC is the one that chose his wardrobe for him.

That means we are the ones who looked at him and his princely attire and decided he needed to look like he just walked out of Hot Topic. See, my favorite type of character is a toss-between princely and edgelord, so that's even funnier to me. Saeran Choi is my full package deal when it comes to aesthetics, I swear.

I wouldn't want to change Ray out of his magenta coat to dress like Unknown. Well, I say that, but if I tell him to wear that and he takes off the jacket, then I can put it on... oh, yes. That's the best way to get a boyfriend's sweater.

But it is the single-handed thought that the MC is the one that put him in this outfit that is sending me to another plane of existence. Can you imagine doing that to him? Because that is way more funny to me than the idea that Ray chose to wear that himself. But it is always possible that he did choose to wear it himself because he often says that his taste and clothes are nothing like the outfit Rika gave him.

I also need to point out that that tattoo would have had to have been drawn on with Sharpie or temporary ink. He doesn't have the tattoo in Another Story. That is a fact that a lot of people get confused about despite the fact that we are shown a visual of him in the shower that proves he doesn't have a huge tattoo.

I suppose you could read this as a bonus AU where in some universe, Ray is the one who gets the tattoo first... which, ouch, I don't know if I can handle that... "I proved myself, body and mind, to my Savior so it isn't possible she'll throw me away. If I brand myself with the cause of Mint Eye... I'll... I'll be safe."

But, what that also implies is that there is a picture of him with that tattoo drawn in some capacity lingering in his room at Magenta. It also means that despite the fact that he and Suit Saeran inevitably disappear after not being able to live up to the potential the Savior wants them to, Unknown stumbles across that design.

Ray: QUICK, I HAVE TO DESIGN SOMETHING EDGY FOR THIS OUTFIT.

Ray: A dragon!

Ray: ME for Mint Eye!

Ray: This certainly won't effect anything later in life!

Two and a Half years later...

Unknown: I don't know who designed this tattoo but it's sick. I need it on my body.

It is so gut-wrenchingly painful for me to think about that. It means that a piece of Ray still exists. Unknown does not even know where that tattoo came from nor does he know who designed it. Because he doesn't get to know Ray one-on-one since I personally believe he isn't Suit Saeran. I view Unknown and Suit Saeran as separate people, after all.

The reason why he has the tattoo is because Ray drew it. I have long wondered where he came up with the idea for the tattoo, and it turns out it wasn't Unknown at all. Ray was the one who drew it and I don't know what to do with that information other than cry.

The Savior only gave him a short amount of time to figure out how to be an idol and he said I'm going to have a tattoo. Sure, should we just assume this is an Easter Egg and the artist might not have known all the details involved in the story of Mystic Messenger? Sure, you can think that, but for the sake of my enjoyment, I'm going along with the theory that I'm right, lol.

That's something that an idol has. Ray says. He draws a sick dragon and a twisted ME. That tattoo is so large and ridiculous, but I love it dearly. Ray, honey, You Are My Forever Babe. But I don't know what to do with you sometimes.

[If you want to know how I think Unknown gets the tattoo, I have a post on that.]

Rika looks amazing here and there is no lie about that. I actually really like the outfit she's wearing even though we can't see a lot of it. It speaks to a music festival because of how simple but trendy it appears. She's trying to be that friendly face that can do no wrong. She wants you to buy her homemade soda, and you should do that.

You should do that right now. It's good for you. There's nothing wrong with it.

A little bubbly soda won't hurt you. What do you mean it's burning your throat as we speak? It's not doing that at all! You're just excited by the electric energy of this concert! Drink more soda! I think the important question to ask ourselves here is how many cans of soda did she bottle and does she think it's going to work out as well as she thinks it does?

I don't think we need to talk about the fact that she is wearing a cross necklace. I don't want to unpack her religious trauma right now. I don't have time to do that right now but I will say it made me laugh my ass off. On a side note, her hair looks good here and I'm jealous of it.

This man looks like his soul just left his body.

I don't know what he's thinking at this very specific moment in time but I know he's not happy to realize that Rika has decided to sell out Ray as an idol. I mean that's probably the last thing he expected to happen. But, it makes sense, Rika loves music and if she thought it would work, she would absolutely push Saeran, Ray, Unknown, etc, into doing that for her. But, it hurts to think about V... to think about those complicated feelings he holds about his mother...

He kind of wanted to learn how to play the violin to get closer to his mother... He's already got complicated feelings about musicians and I don't know if his adopted son here being an idol is doing much good for him. It reminds me of the bad ending in the RAE.

He wasn't particularly comfortable in that situation either and this just reminds me of that. Which is a shame, because that ending is so horrible. It is one of the worst endings that you can get in this entire series.

I don't think we need to get into that in general, but just know that if you want to hurt yourself, aim to get that bad ending. If I can say nothing else, I'm really happy to see his long hair because I think it's the most attractive aesthetic for him. I've always liked that style on him a lot more than the traditional one. I don't know what it is about that look for him but it just works. He's like a wet kitten in a cardboard box.

I can't believe she decided to hold the concert at 7:00 p.m. I mean, I can most certainly believe she would do that, but it feels like spitting in Ray's face. Why would you do that, Rika? I know it's just a cute little Easter egg to remind us of his brother but oh my God that's awful.

I don't think anybody I've seen talking about this has pointed it out but the background colors are literally the same as Ray and V's hearts. It's the magenta and teal hearts. I thought that was a good touch. I do know that it's also in homage to the fact that it's Mint Eye and the building is called Magenta. It's a 2-in-1 package deal. Just like the fact that I got to see Ray dressed as Unknown. This is a two-for-one deal!

I do think it's interesting that they chose to make the penlights white. That means his image color is white. Oh, yeah, idols have image colors that correlate to those penlights so those things are very important! I didn't expect white. But, I didn't expect him to be an idol ever again after that bad ending. I mean that ending is horrible but he has great hair in it so like we're winning and losing.

Best day of my life. I won Unknown and Ray.

55 notes · View notes

froggibus · 1 year

Text

Rest and Recovery - poly! Zenyatta & Genji x reader

Pairing: poly! Zenyatta and poly! Genji x reader

Genre: hurt/comfort, fluff

Word Count: 1.4k

Summary: after getting hurt, Zen and Genji know just how to take care of you

CW: blood, violence, gang violence, fainting, severe injury, knives (switchblades), hurt/comfort, (fluff eventually i swear), poly! relationship (kinda)

here is my Zenji brainrot no one asked for lol. this has been on my mind for like a while but i finally got around to writing it. also have severe leon kennedy brainrot rn so there's a 50/50 chance next time i post it'll be that

————

Genji and Zen had always warned you not to go too close to the villages nearby the monastery. Though most of the locals had learned to live with the colony of omnics on the mountain, there were some who actively rebelled against them.

Gangs pounced on any omnic or omnic sympathiser who got too close to city limits. The lucky ones came back to the monastery sore and missing a few parts, and you never learned what became of the unlucky ones.

That’s what led the pair to constantly warn you about wandering too close. You were precious cargo, they said. They didn’t want anything bad to happen to you.

Listening was never your strong suit. That’s how you found yourself being beaten by a few low ranking gang members.

One with dark, spiky hair spat on you. “Had enough yet, freak?”

You narrow your eyes on them. “No,” you lie. The truth is, your sides are burning and your head is spinning, but if you give in now, you’ll never be able to live with yourself.

“That’s too bad,” another one says, his words punctuated by the distinct sound of a switchblade.

Suddenly you’ve had enough.

You scramble to your feet, your heart pumping adrenaline through your veins faster than you can track. The pain in your body fades as you try to run away, only for one to grab your hair and tug you into his chest.

You kick off of him and manage to get away, but not before the switchblade grazes your side. Still, the scrape is nothing compared to the regret flooding through you.

You run, pushing off of the pavement as hard as you can, dragging yourself back to the monastery limits. You’re barely aware of your injuries or the warm blood dripping down your side. Your only solace is that it’s just a scrape, that your injuries aren’t major and you won’t have to tell Zen and Genji about your scuffle.

You wouldn’t be able to bear their disappointment.

As soon as you make it to the main stretch of land, monks stare at you. You ignore their stares, limping to the temple and the rooms that reside around it.

You stumble to your room, but as you get there, you see Genji leaning against the outside wall. “Genji?” You squint.

“Oh my god, y/n…”

He looks horrified, dark eyes narrowed on you in surprise. You look down to where your hand has been squeezing the spot you got scraped, only to realize it wasn’t a scrape at all.

Blood gushes from what you now see is a stab wound, pouring down your side and onto your legs. You look up at Genji, the reality setting in and bringing nothing but pain with it.

“Wha—” you start to say, but your knees give in and the world goes dark.

Genji catches you, your cold body falling against his. He swings your legs up over his arm, and before he even realizes where he’s going, he’s running to find Zenyatta.

He’s frantic, tearing through the monastery in search of his master. You lose more and more blood by the moment. It pours over his clothes and down his body.

He finds him in the gardens, meditating. On a good day, he’d never disturb him while he concentrates. But it wasn’t a good day—it was the worst day of his life.

“Master!” He calls, and the omnic’s head snaps up to see his student holding your unconscious form.

————

You wake up warm and comfortable, almost comfortable enough to forget the horrors of the day. You blink your eyes open slowly, trying to adjust them to the light.

Genji sits at your bedside, head in his hands. Next to him, meditating, is Zenyatta. The sight of your boys brings a smile to your face until you remember how you got injured.

“G-guys?” You murmur, your voice hoarse.

Both heads snap to you at the same time.

“How are you feeling?” Zen asks.

You shrug, “mostly good…just tired.”

“Y/n,” Genji sighs, leaning in to hug you. “What happened? How did you get so injured?”

“I-I left the village limits,” you admit, “I’m sorry, I know you guys said not to but-but I was bored!”

“Y/n—”

“Let’s not focus on the past,” Zen interrupts, shooting Genji a look. “I managed to heal, and you survived. That is what matters.”

His words don’t leave much room for interpretation, both you and Genji quieting afterwards.

Zen rubs a hand across your forehead, smoothing your hair back. “I’ll get us some tea, okay?”

You nod and watch as he floats out of the room before turning your attention to Genji. He has his head in his hands, black hair falling through the cracks of his fingers. You sigh—it wasn’t fair for you to make him worry like this.

“Gen,” you murmur, running your hand across his shoulder. “Talk to me.”

He looks up at you with bloodshot eyes, eyebrows knit together. You run your hand up his shoulder and cup his cheek, the cold metal of his jaw warming under your touch.

“I never want to see you that hurt again, y/n,” his voice is shaking, “please don’t be so reckless with yourself. Please.”

“I promise.”

He sighs in relief, “thank you.”

You nod, reaching your other hand to intertwine with one of his. He offers you a weak smile, squeezing your hand in reassurance. Zen walks back into the room carrying a tray of steaming teacups and sets them down on the nightstand.

You can see him glance at your intertwined hands and hum in appreciation. He hands you a cup and another to Genji, and that’s when you notice the grey ball of fabric tucked under his arm.

“Here,” he notices your gaze and thrusts the fabric out to you, “you need to stay warm to recover.”

You flush slightly but set the tea down and take the sweater from him. You tug it over your head, the sleeves hanging over your hands and the fabric practically engulfing you.

Genji looks at you and almost chokes on his tea, “isn’t that my sweater?”

“Indeed,” Zen says smugly.

“Why didn’t you get one of yours? Not that I mind but,” he gestures to how large it looks on you.

“Mine wouldn’t have looked so cute.”

If you were flushed before, you were practically on fire now. You weren’t used to all this attention from them, and certainly not at the same time. You take a deep breath and sip your tea, hoping it’ll calm your racing heart.

“Your face is so red, y/n,” Zen notes, “is it something I said?”

You want to tell him that he knows damn well it’s something he said, but Genji speaks first. “So cute,” he murmurs, using a thumb to brush a strand of hair behind your ear.

“G-guys!”

Both boys back off, chuckling slightly at your reaction. You squint at them, “how am I supposed to rest with the two of you teasing me?”

“Aw, y/n,” Genji coos, “we’ll leave you alone and let you rest, okay?”

He sits up from his chair and grabs his tea but you find yourself reaching up and grabbing the fabric of his shirt. “Wait—”

He turns around, Zen hovering just next to him. The sides of Genji’s mouth lift up in amusement.

“Do you…do you guys have to go?”

“Of course not,” Zenyatta says, and suddenly he’s at your bedside and lifting up the corner of the sheets to lay next to you.

You’re so distracted by the sudden contact of warm metal on your skin that you don’t even notice Genji crawling in on the opposite side, essentially sandwiching you between them.

“Are you comfortable enough?” Zen asks.

You nod, curling up between them. Genji throws an arm across your waist and scooches closer to you, his body heat warming you better than any blanket.

“Good,” he says, “but you better actually rest, y/n.”

Your cheeks burn at the implication, but you’re too tired to make any jokes about how being sandwiched between them in bed has been a dream of yours for a while. Instead, you close your eyes and try to sleep.

#overwatch 2 #overwatch #ow2 #overwatch x reader #overwatch x you #ow #overwatch fic #xreader #overwatch headcanons #zenyatta x you #zenyatta x reader #zenyatta #poly Overwatch #genji x you #genji x reader #genji shimada

166 notes · View notes

morrigan-sims · 5 months

Text

D&D OC Intro

(inspired by @goldenwaves's post!!)

[transcript under the cut]

This is FAR from everyone, but it's the characters I've played for more than a oneshot, and the ones I actually talk about. (I would have added Asra, but I didn't have a pic of her with a black background. I'll probably update this later.)

TRANSCRIPT:

Zenara Raventhorn (aka Zen)

Tiefling Warlock (Pact of the Fiend)

The first D&D character I ever played.

Only got to play two sessions with them.

Unintentionally inspired by Critical Role Campaign 2

Backstory written between 1-3am on my phone.

Has an imp familiar who looks like a raven.

Occasionally gets possessed by their patron, and then gets given new powers as an "apology".

Fire theme.

Rook (Adrian Lockwood)

Half-elf Rogue (Swashbuckler)

First (and only) character to make it past 8 sessions. (So far.)

Disaster bisexual pirate boy with SO MUCH trauma.

Wields a magic rapier that was a gift from his captain + first mentor.

Enemies with a different pirate captain who wants to capture him.

Has decent charisma but relatively terrible social skills.

Bastard son of a nobleman. Has daddy issues.

Reckless and impulsive to a fault. Would die for his friends.

May or may not be cursed by a demon lord.

Asola Riava Ashmark

Aasimar Paladin (Oath of Vengeance)

Made it 8 sessions before we switched campaigns.

Doesn't know she's an aasimar. Her powers show up when she experiences extreme emotions and it's only ever happened twice in her life.

Got briefly possessed and then force-shut-down by a literal god.

Has a habit of picking up stray traumatized young people.

The party's moral compass. Tried to keep them somewhat in line.

Believes that laying down her life to save someone else's is worth it. Swears she doesn't have self-worth issues.

Morana Novak

Witch (Curse Patron)

Character for an eventual Pathfinder game.

Named after a Slavic goddess of death and winter.

Necromancer, got kicked out of her hometown for graverobbing and experimenting on corpses.

Her familiar is a raven named Miro, who she rescued and trained.

Autistic as hell, which will be fun for me to play.

Very creepy and unsettling person.

One of her future party members nicknamed her "Mortician".

Cyra

Fire Genasi Barbarian (Path of the Storm Herald)

Newest character on this powerpoint.

Fights with a magical flaming quarterstaff that she can summon from inside herself.

Has a stolen, magically powered vehicle.

Formerly part of a cult. Only stayed around for their toxic then-girlfriend.

Somehow basically the least traumatized member of the party. That was NOT the plan.

#morrigan plays dnd #dnd #my dnd ocs #semi-sims

24 notes · View notes

butterflydm · 10 months

Text

structural overhaul for TGS-AMoL

spoilers through a memory of light (all the way to the ending)

Instead of doing the same sort of evaluation that I did with the Jordan books, I am going to propose a different structure for the final three books, one that I've been working on as I've been going through my reread.

There are a couple of big changes to fix things that felt like plot holes/character issues but I tried to keep all the major milestone points. The bulk of the changes that I would suggest are in ToM but there are a handful of significant elements for both TGS & AMoL. This post is only covering the Sanderson books, taking off from the end of KoD.

The Gathering Storm

Rand's storyline in TGS stops after the aftermath of Natrin's Barrow, holding the rest for ToM.

Parts of Perrin's plotline from ToM get moved to here, including some of his wolf-dream training so that it feels a bit more spread out. Maybe end his storyline here with him going into the 'fear dreams' of other sleepers for the first time. Cut out all the Whitecloak infighting and etc. that we had at the beginning of ToM, though. Begin Galad's part of the story with him running into Basel Gill.

Cut out Hinderstap entirely, starting Mat's storyline with him searching out the mystery woman who ends up being Verin (this will save us a tiny bit of page space in AMoL as well).

Include Mat's ToM chapter where he encounters the gholam again in Caemlyn and then have Mat and Elayne reunite in this book, holding the rest for ToM.

Pretty much all of Egwene's TGS plotline stays intact, except for not having her epilogue where she sees the light from Dragonmount.

Everything else basically as written.

Towers of Midnight

Start with ruthless!Rand meeting with Egwene, as opposed to zen!Rand. Ruthless!Rand still has all the same motivations about wanting to succeed at the Last Battle, and this means that they can have more genuine friction, because Rand really will be Not Doing Well.

The remaining parts of Perrin's storyline stay in ToM (though the bit where he and the wolves watch Rand on Dragonmount is either cut or placed as part of the epilogue to the book), so that would be the results of the trial, making his new weapon, facing Slayer, accidentally helping Egwene.

Have Mat give into his curiosity and open the letter from Verin. Mat leading the charge to prevent Caemlyn from being invaded would be an excellent reason for everyone to trust him with the armies in AMoL and not having Caemlyn be invaded would save us some page time in AMoL, leaving room for more character moments. And it can still be turned into a frantic series of events that requires tactical knowledge, since there would still be a Darkfriend betrayal of the guards, etc.

Egwene is gathering forces to potentially face either the Last Battle or ruthless!Rand. Because Rand is Not Doing Well, she isn't having everyone and their cousin reassure her about Rand's state of mind.

If Rand isn't involved in cleaning up the Black Tower anyway, then it's fine for it to happen while he's still ruthless!Rand, so give this storyline to Nynaeve. Suggestion: the trigger is Nynaeve going to Myrelle to get Lan's bond, since Myrelle is literally right outside the Black Tower. This way Nynaeve gets to be involved in the Black Tower clean-up, and is one of the primary PoVs about the events there, which would help it feel more connected to the rest of the story.

Then we move into the Rand & Tam scene, Rand nearly kills his dad and then runs away.

Mat goes to the Tower of Ghenjei and saves Moiraine, placed in-between Rand's lowest moment and his epiphany.

Rand on Dragonmount. The original "Apples" chapter from the start of this book is the epilogue, maybe also including Egwene looking out and seeing the light on the mountain.

Everything else basically as written.

A Memory of Light

The important zen!Rand scenes (telling the Aiel he's ready to meet his toh, weeding out the Darkfriends, apologizing to his dad; saving Ituralde; meeting with the Borderlanders) take place early on in AMoL. This is mostly a single chapter in ToM, so it won't take up too much page time, lol. I would also strongly suggest some or most of these scenes being in Rand's PoV rather than Min's. It was a huge mistake to have the readers shut out of post-epiphany Rand's thoughts.

Mat goes with Moiraine to Merrilor; Moiraine is the key to getting Egwene to believe that Rand has really changed from ruthless!Rand to zen!Rand, because of how Rand reacts to seeing that she's alive. It's hard to believe that Rand is hard as a stone when he's weeping all over Moiraine's shoulder.

Mat finds out how worried everyone is about the Seanchan attacking them from behind while they go after the Dark One and volunteers to go to Fortuona to bring her another potential peace treaty (this is when he tells them about the marriage). This is the biggest actual 'plot' change. Reasoning as follows:

While I understand that Sanderson needed an excuse to get Mat to Ebou Dar to impregnate Tuon as per the Jordan-written epilogue, I am not impressed by the way he chose to handle it. And my way solves the problem of: when would the Emond's Field Five get to reunite. Because 'never' is actually a terrible answer.

This also means that when Mat goes back to Ebou Dar, he's not being a deserter from the Last Battle (which is completely counter to Mat's characterization! His main heroic character trait is "grumbles about it but does the right thing anyway" -- abandoning your friends and the fate of the world to go hang out with the slavers who have invaded your continent isn't 'the right thing' in any circumstances). He'll genuinely be trying to help both sides in a good way and not a slaver-apologist way. It doesn't fix Mat's face-heel turn in CoT & KoD but it helps it make a bit more sense, I think, especially if Mat actually tries to stand up against Tuon demanding everything and bargains her down to the terms the Westlands have agreed they're willing to live with. Just... giving their marriage an actual narrative purpose would be nice and make their subplot feel like more than just a distraction from the main storyline.

It also would actually make logistical sense and Mat wouldn't magically teleport down to Ebou Dar while managing to magically summon his horse from Merrilor. Two things that he cannot actually do.

And then we continue on with AMoL mostly as written. Because of earlier cuts, we can cut the Hinterstap & Caemlyn assault sections, which should free up some time to find in the Rand stuff as suggested above, as well as accommodating Mat being at Merrilor. In general, I would say cutting down on some of the battle portions of the Last Battle would be fine; like @markantonys mentioned to me in my reread posts -- do we really need three separate duels between Demandred and A Great Swordsman?

Minor characterization fixes that I would also suggest:

Fortuona: the main suggestion that I have about her isn't actually 'for' her but for Mat (and Min) -- maintain the complicated way that Mat was thinking about her in ToM rather than cutting Mat off from his past loyalties at the start of the book. This would be easier once he's going there as a negotiator rather than a defector, as per the suggested changes above. For Fortuona herself, I do think that it's too late to try to shoehorn any significant character development in (it needed to begin in CoT & KoD, when she was away from her powerbase, if it was going to happen), so I think Sanderson made the right call there, but not taking Mat backwards at the start of AMoL would be good, as would not having Min just instantly give Fortuona the same exact kind of special treatment that she gives to the savior of the world and the man she says that she loves (Rand). It is, frankly, just weird how quickly Min folds herself into the Seanchan hierarchy and even when Mat starts questioning the slavery system again (finally), we never see Min doing that in her own PoV -- she has unspecific criticisms about the Seanchan Empire but never thinks about them clearly even in her own thoughts.

Nynaeve: Beside the big Black Tower plotline shift, she should not find out that Elayne is pregnant in ToM. It adds nothing to the story except bafflement when she proceeds to say goodbye to Rand very soon after and not only doesn't say anything to him but doesn't even think about it. After her thoughts of horror about how Min and Rand are shacking up without being married, she should have SOME big feelings about how Rand is having kids with Elayne without being married to her.

Tam: should already know about Elayne when he reunites with Rand and meets Min, since Perrin talked about how Elayne was planning to marry Rand while Tam was still with his people, so Tam should mention her to Rand and/or Min. Minor comedy element to serve as a moment of breaking the tension of prepping for the Last Battle! Explaining Min's viewings and/or Aiel relationship customs to the dad! Also, have Tam get 'introduced' to Elayne & Aviendha as well. It's so weird in AMoL when Tam and Elayne treat each other incredibly formally even though Elayne has announced that she's pregnant with Rand's kids. Basically, actually deal with people finding out that Rand has multiple girlfriends, rather than everyone acting like a memo was sent out that read: "Dragon Reborn dating three women: be cool about it and please don't have any emotional scenes".

Aviendha: have her leave for Rhuidean BEFORE the Semirhage attack in TGS. Her distance before that is explainable, if frustrating, but having her still stay away from Rand after that happens just feels bizarre and infuriating. This also means that her Rhuidean chapters can happen earlier in continuity, and she can come back to the main storyline sooner.

Unfortunately, the issues with both Perrin and Mat's characters are deeply embedded by this time, since they were focused on so much in CoT & KoD, but I would suggest, as mentioned above, that having Mat personally take an active role in protecting Caemlyn from invasion and then leveraging his marriage to actually be useful in AMoL would both work wonders, because as it is, the only person who gets anything useful out of the Mat-Tuon marriage is Fortuona, while Mat just gets weighed down with liabilities.

Though a lot of that goes back to one of my core issues with the Seanchan, which is at play in both the Jordan and Sanderson eras -- the only reason they are as effective as they are is because the narrative and our protagonists keep helping them (ex. the Wondergirls not telling all their allies the sul'dam secret and not making it public knowledge -- especially egregious with Elayne, who knows what she wants to do to undermine the Seanchan and has plenty of motivation to do it but just... doesn't bother???; Mat just aimlessly bumbling around with Tuon for two books; Perrin choosing to reach out to the Seanchan for help when Faile is kidnapped instead of sending one of the Asha'man back to Rand to see if he can help, since at that point Perrin has actually completed his secret mission for Rand and technically has Masema with him, etc). So when the narrative then goes "ah Our Heroes have no choice but to ally with the slavers", I immediately go, "yes, you did have choices, you just inexplicably chose not to do those things". The narrative never successfully sold me on the lack of choice for our protagonists, because it was just too easy to see the Hand of the Author(s) protecting and shielding the Seanchan from the natural narrative consequences of their actions.

So, that would help with Mat. IDK how to help with Perrin's characterization. That's a mess. It's possible that it might feel less like Perrin did a pay-to-play instant upgrade of his wolf abilities if it's spread out over both TGS and ToM, though. With the Whitecloak stuff... it's just so hard for me to care about Perrin getting ~closure~ for killing two Whitecloaks knowing that he gets away with selling two hundred women into slavery. Perrin and Mat are the two characters who were most broken by the Slog, but Mat is much easier to rehabilitate than Perrin (and tbh Sanderson was mostly doing a good job with it until Mat's off-the-page face-heel turn in AMoL) because the puzzle pieces are all there for Mat to have a good story; while Perrin was basically just an empty frame that had to be filled in from scratch. I do think (again agreeing with @markantonys) that instead of him napping for a large portion of the Last Battle, that he should have had Elyas's place in rallying the wolves for the fighting (and maybe delegate some of the TAR stuff to the Wise One Dreamwalkers, who get pretty underused here).

Egwene should be fine once we've adjusted Rand's structure to have ruthless!Rand last longer. There's nothing wrong with the majority of her plotline in these books; it's just that her behavior would make more sense if we were still dealing with ruthless!Rand.

Min: having her and Mat be instantly familiar with each other was definitely a shortcut to shift her into the Seanchan plotline but it is such a glaring plothole. They barely know each other! They have maybe met once, back at the very end of book 2, when Mat was desperately sick from the dagger. Her memories about him should be the same as Uno's ("always snapping at people, eyes sunken in his head. Half-dead, half-spoiled"). The only things they would really know about each other are the things that Rand has told them about each other. Yet Min is able to instantly 'recognize' Mat's 'signature hat' despite him not getting it until book 4 (I guess Rand must have really been obsessed with Mat's fashion and explained it to Min in detail!).

Basically, Mat and Min treat each other with the familiarity that Min and Perrin should have with each other (from the winter they spent together between 2 & 3). Fixing Mat's storyline would definitely help this, as he and Min would get to 'reunite'/meet with all Mat's friends present to vouch for him.

Min also immediately being all about Fortuona is a story beat that feels like it dismisses Min's personal experiences with the Seanchan, having helped rescue Egwene from slavery back in Falme. So… write that differently, lol.

Otherwise, I would put some of the skipped reunions and emotional moments actually on the page: Mat's reunion with the rest of the EF5 I covered above (aka, it should have happened), but Sanderson should also have kept the cut scene about Aviendha, Elayne, & Min making bridal wreaths for Rand or another scene where we actually get to see them (or ideally them plus Rand) all together; we should have actually seen Elayne & Gawyn reunite (they have not seen each other since... book 3? I'm pretty sure not since book 3); we should have had Rand's ACTUAL reaction to finding out that Elayne is pregnant and not having it happen off-screen and just referenced in his narration (we see both Nynaeve's and Mat's reactions to Elayne's pregnancy but not Rand's? wtf!); seeing Egwene & Gawyn's marriage seems like it would have been more relevant than seeing Morgase & Tallanvor's, etc.

Overall, fewer battles, more character moments.

Yes, it's the Last Battle but it's also the last book with these characters and they deserve their emotional send-off as much as just a narrative/plot one. That's my general feeling. There's a lot in the last three books that I like, but there are also some very strange choices and while "we were trying to preserve Jordan's bits of completed writing as much as possible" can probably explain some of the odd beats, I doubt it explains all of them.

#wot #wheel of time #wot book spoilers #wot spoilers #the gathering storm #towers of midnight #a memory of light #mat cauthon #rand al'thor #egwene al'vere #nynaeve al'meara #perrin aybara #wot reread #because it all came out of thoughts as I did my reread #i was originally going to post this wednesday #but then we got the news that the trailer will be coming out #so that's where my brain will be tomorrow

49 notes · View notes

astridthevalkyrie · 2 months

Note

U want lds thoughts? I gotchu 🫡

I really like all 3 boys, but I'm leaning Zayne bc he's just so husband coded. He's the only one I could see a long-term relationship w. I love Xavier and Rafayel, but I just can't picture them as husbands or dads (at least w my MC/myself). I also desperately need them to interact in game and in the main story, there's just sm potential for chaos and funnies.

I honestly dk what will happen next. Obviously, MC is gonna want to investigate Onichynus and her heart, but idk how that story will unfold or how they'll tie in the stories w each li and their separate myths/reincarnation bit. (Also, the fact that the myths happen in the future doesn't make sense to me yet, so I hope they plan to really flesh that out and not give us questionable writing like most mobile otomes do). Idk how I feel abt Sylus (and possibly Caleb) becoming lis, ig I'll have to see what they're like and if they appeal to me at all, bc so far we haven't had enough Caleb content for me to actually get attached (I was also convinced he was MCs brother so idt I'll ever be able to see him romantically 😭).

I hope we'll get to see more of the side characters and what MCs life is like outside of just the three guys, but I honestly doubt it lmao (more for me to hc abt ig lol).

I have more but this is already rambly and idk how to be coherent rn. This game is giving me brainworms and I'm def thinking abt it too hard. Oh, well. I don't consume media, media consumes me.

i'm telling you it's xavier boyfriend zayne husband and rafayel sneaky link. that's exactly the look and vibe they give off.

i think as of right now zayne is the most popular, at least on ao3 him/mc is the most popular ship. which is just to be expected when you have a levi ackerman coded character LOL. like you said, he's a husband. he just is. he's a doctor and he's successful and he cares for the mc so deeply it just makes sense. i started the game for him because. i mean he looks like THAT. he acts like THAT. he has ice powers and you get to melt the ice in his heart and make him love you i adore that shit see my pinned post for the kind of romance i write you could make a zayne x reader set in the aot universe and it would be my fic. and dooooooon't get me started on dawnbreaker zayne. DON'T GET ME STARTED i gasped during the anecdote when the truth about the kid comes out. he dreams about his past life what the fuck bro what the fuck.

surprisingly, though, while i do love him, he's probably the one i've had the least amount of thoughts about (that's still clearly a lot of thoughts so that's not saying much). i think it's partly because my gacha favors xavier and rafayel a lot more and right now i pretty much am just heavily thinking about whichever guy i consumed the content for last.

xavier and rafayel have me obsessed. i thought xavier would be completely meh because zen from mysme was meh for me. but um. he was not meh. my levi hawks pattern has told me that i love a man who was forced into fighting because of the stupid goodness in his heart and manipulative outside forces. and even though that's not exactly what's going on with xav, he does have that vibe. his is the only myth i've watched in full and i'm just. they should have been able to go to uluru together. the scene where they're both lying on the ground i have watched it so many times. i love love love the royalty x captain of the guards trope so much. the fact that they both serve in both roles is insane. i've read the anecdote about her first life on philos too there's a fucking part in there that talks about how he shares his EARBUDS with you?????? end me.

and rafayel is beautiful. like he's actually beautiful. his english voice actor makes him sound so fucking bisexual + the bi wife energy whenever you're with him is just. UGH. the game is hilarious whenever he's on screen and obviously with the way the main story has ended for now he's the most intriguing. and while you can feel the pining energy from all three of them, his is just. lowkey the most pathetic. and i eat it up. bro started TEACHING AT HER COLLEGE just for the chance to see her. i like that he's not possessive per se but he is very whiny and attention seeking the sassy man syndrome is real. i need to unlock his myth but i'm not patient so i may very likely just watch it on youtube. i need to see hunter rafayel. i need to see him right now.

the main story is genuinely fascinating. i was a little bit bored up until the explosion happened and it really kicked in. bc suddenly it's not just 3 guys and you doing your best, but you actively investigating and them helping you. like i said i don't have raf's myth and i haven't finished zayne's yet (need more fucking upgrades to his card) so i don't have the full story but at least what i'm getting right now is okay. they're all from the past or future. they all remember?? xavier and rafayel definitely do. zayne knows something about grandma who seems kinda shady to me. i've seen the caleb=sylus or at least caleb lives theories. i saw someone say the man at the end isn't sylus though? and his english va is the same as caleb's but in other languages it's someone else. idk.

idk about the others but xavier's myth being in the future makes sense. i'm pretty sure the timeline goes: in our current timeline, earth is about to go bye-bye and become inhabitable bc of wanderers -> survivors go to philos -> xavier and a new mc are both born -> she dies bc of something in her heart and is reborn bc she's the only one who's truly immortal (everyone else on philos lives forever naturally but can still be killed i think??) -> new lightseeker mc and xavier are meant to become guard and prince respectively but philos is dying -> to save mc from being sacrificed again and again xavier decides to go back in time to find another way where he after at least like 200 years meets current timeline mc

i know what you mean about not being able to see caleb as a love interest. the first time i saw him i genuinely thought they had no need to make my brother this hot what the fuck. and then i realized he was just her childhood friend and i went

and then he blew up 😭

i neeeeeed to see the love interests interact. i mean mc barely thinks about the others whenever she's with one but i really hope in the next arc we actually see them meeting each other. beefing or working together or whatever, i need to know (i may also have already started a fic about what's gonna happen next bc i'm mentally ill). xavier has a tracker on her so he should be able to find her and zayne kinda disappeared off the face of the earth but i want them all back. i want interaction. i want it so bad.

#thank you for the thoughts and for letting me ramble LMAO #love and deepspace

14 notes · View notes

gohjuo · 2 months

Text

GOJO'S DEEP CONNECTION TO BUDDHISM

SIX ELEMENTS

to first understand gojo's deep connection to buddhism, it's important to talk about esoteric buddhism and the six elements. very similar to china's five elements esoteric buddhism has the five elements as: earth, water, fire, air/wind, space/void. however, esoteric buddhism as one additional element the mind. gojo's powers involve space ( his manipulation of space itself and his domain expansion being called unlimited void ). gojo's journey to becoming the strongest was not complete until he opened his mind. as stated, by adding the sixth element the mind, it creates a unity between all five elements. if one lacks the sixth element, ordinary eyes see only the differientated forms/appearances.

this ties in with the fact that gojo's eyes allow him to see things most people cannot see ( people's souls in colors, reading the flow of cursed energy, viewing of his opponent's cursed technique, object dection with or without cursed energy, & being able to see kilometers away ). it can also be said that being born as the six eyes user brought balance, a connection to how the mind element creates unity.

SATORI

in zen buddhism, this is the term for awakening in japanese zen buddhism. it means comprehension, understanding. the word is derived from the japanese verb satoru, who's first name is satoru? gojo's. to put it further, satori refers to an awakening or apprehension of the true nature of reality. it's used to describe an experience that can't be expressed via words. gojo goes through his enlightenment, his death, and never does he really talk about what he went through. he talks about an indescribable feeling, feelng the whole world, this connection to it and to feel everything happening, but if anyone were to ask him how he felt touching the core of cursed energy he would not be able to explain it properly. it is an experience he will never fully properly explain.

another way this ties into gojo is that his confrontation with toji, is something of an antagonistic one. in the way, that after the second fight he truly dislikes having a lack of control, he doesn't want to feel hepless, or be helpless with all the immense power that he has. gojo is forced to face the reality of defeat, the reality of having little control at all, and the fact that he didn't fully realize the capabilities of his powers. in the modern era of jujutsu, gojo is the standard.

ALLUSIONS TO OTHER FIGURES IN BUDDHISM

VAIROCANA part of the five great buddhas or the five tathāgatas, they are seen as the five representations of the adi-buddha ( aka the first buddha). vairocana is associated with the color white ( gojo's hair is white ), vairocana represents the element of space, which coincides with gojo's technique and ability manipulate space itself. the cardinal direction vairocana represents is the center and the season they represent is a transition. gojo could be considered a big transition in the way the jujutsu world operated as, again his birth balanced out the jujutsu world. it is also a big transition in being dubbed the strongest sorcerer of his era.

MARICI

a goddess associated with the light and sun. alternatively, in japan she is also associated with light or mirage and was invoked to escape enemies. she has several depictions and in some she carries the lotus with her. in gojo's dream/death sequence, there is a drawing of a lotus flower. the lotus flower in buddhism represents purity, spiritual awakening, and faiththfulness. it also symbolizes rebirth ( which will be furthered tied down to another section ) and the implications of nanami and gojo's conversation hints at a rebirth of some sort.

THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE FOUR DIRECTIONS

in buddhism, there is great importance in north, east, south, and west. for this particular post i will be focusing on the two directions of north and south.

"I ONCE ASKED MEI-SAN ABOUT WHERE I SHOULD LIVE. SHE SAID IF YOU'D LIKE TO BECOME SOMEONE NEW. GO NORTH."

the north is considered a symbol of stability, a fixed goal that never wavers. it also represents unshakeable conviction. when your will is strong, you are under the protection of the guide of the north. when you become unstable, the grace of god pulls you in the right direction. it should be noted that gojo does say i see, gives a wave. in my opinion, it implicates that gojo has determined to go north. gojo is also the type of person who has a strong conviction, his will to ensure that the future of jujutsu sorcery can be on his level, to be strong enough to compete with himself, so that they never have to endure what he/geto went through. gojo is someone who will always aim higher to break the ceiling even if he is the ceiling.

alternatively, there is another direction that is mentioned in said chapter:

"IF YOU'D LIKE TO RETURN TO WHO YOU WERE, GO SOUTH."

the south is associated with death. it offers complete rest. when the body can no longer lead us down our path, the protector of the south, yama raja, lord of death, ensures we get rid of our vehicle ( the body ) and gives us a new one. the catch is that in general, we form attachments to our body, mind, and senses and we have a hard time of letting go. however, once someone does they will find that 'long sleep' is a restful. this line goes in hand with nanami who doesn't hesitate to go south, stuck in the past since he still had attachments to haibara, and in a sense yuji. but at the end of it he was able to let go.

#✧ → ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴏ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴇʏᴇs sᴇᴇ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ? ( ʜᴄ. )#✧ → ᴅɪᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴇɴʟɪɢʜᴛᴇɴᴍᴇɴᴛ ? ( sᴛᴜᴅʏ. )#q.#yes the second half is me coping #but i truly believe there's a lot of set up for this #also gojo being paired up with the lotus flower #all very very telling #it's been a lot of research #cross referencing a lot of stuff #you can also make the case that gojo is bodhisattva #hmm maybe i'll cook that

13 notes · View notes