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sukunas-wife · 5 months

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Ryoumen “i want a second son” Sukuna except he gets a feral little princess who matches his energy and is not above taking big bites of dad and only yuuji-nii can control her sksks

Eegehehe- warning- I suck at writing for girls actually😭 I’ve never had a younger sister or niece 🥹 my female cousins are literally non existent also,

The doctor became nervous after your newborn started crying. The maids made quick work of taking care of everything and handing you your child already bundled up. Sukuna was just as confused before he took his child from you, carefully unfolding the blanket.

The room was silent, everyone turning to Sukuna, for a brief second your aching muscles were numb that you didn’t feel after birth. You were nervous, what happened, why didn’t anyone say anything? Sukuna held the child with two large hands supporting it, using his other two hands to carefully pull back the blanket. He didn’t lift his head, but you watched his mouth gape slightly like he wanted to say something. He turned his head slightly, settling on just looking at you through the corner of his eyes. It was a low rasp “she’s a girl,” he cleared his throat wrapping her back up. Without a doubt it was his, his pink hair, she had even taken to his red eyes like Yuji had. His fixed stare didn’t show it but he was concerned for her, even if he had wanted a second son, “Lord Sukuna we co-No.” he turned to Uraume, “It’s my child regardless if it’s a boy or not. She stays here.” He leaned back, handing you your daughter.

After everyone had cleared the room you were breastfeeding your child. Sukuna sat with arms crossed, eyes closed and his head resting back against the wall. You were staring down at your little girl and you realised, “You didn’t want a daughter because it’s going to force you to settle down.” You were grinning like a fool when you turned to look at Sukuna, he grunted not opening an eye or looking at you. “I’d be a fool to let anything happen to my daughter.”

You hummed, “If she’s anything like you I’m sure she can handle her own like Yuji when she’s older.” Sukuna opened an eye looking at you, “Anya..” you turned to look at him. “Her name is Anya.” There was no room to argue with him on that. He stood up, “I’ll bring Yuji.”

He left the room before you mocked him “oouu I’m Sukuna I’m gonna protect my daughter I’m a big bad tough guy.” You scoffed to yourself, “He doesn’t realise he’ll never hurt another child again Anya.” Leaning down you kissed her little head, and she barely opened her eyes.

—————

“hehehe” Sukuna was sitting on his throne head resting on his fist, eyes closed. You left a while ago to do something he already forgot about. Yuji wanted to go with you but Anya held him back, Anyways was an anomaly. She had no cursed energy or presence. Yet she still had the power to read minds, it was something that baffled Sukuna.

He learned she had that power at the worst time, when you were all gathered eating breakfast. When he thought about getting a collar. Anya just jumped excited “are we getting a dog like the one’s old man sells in town?!” Everyone looked concerned at Anya and she pointed at your husband with a bright smile, “Papa was thinking about buying a collar!” You looked at Sukuna “When did you- Right now! He was thinking about looking for a collar and a really good one so it doesn’t slip up or come loose.” It was the heat on your cheeks when you realised what collar he meant, but you were more concerned when you thought he was actually saying these things out loud in front of Anya.

Sukuna was looking away trying to clear his throat, ‘What the hell is this brat on about? I didn't say that shit out loud… did I?’

“OOOO PAPA SAID A BAD WORD!” Anya covered her mouth with her hands and she turned to you, your mind was drawing a blank ‘…what..what’s going on…”

Yuji was spaced out shovelling food into his face before he looked over, “Anya sit down don’t stand on the chair.” She listened to his not so demanding verse and sat down, “okay Yuji-nii.” She plopped down in her chair before perking up, “Are we getting a dog?”

Sukuna cleared his throat again looked right at her, if his hunch was right, ‘No, we’re not bringing some mangy mutt into the house’

Anya deflated and rested her chin on the table pouting, “why not?” ‘Because I said so.’ “Then why’d you say?” ‘Because I’m the owner of this house I decide what goes and comes.’ Anya sighed, getting teary eyed, trying her best to plead silently the way Yuji had taught her. Yuji snickered and he turned to you, you were sitting down whispering and asking Yuji if he knew what was going on. He explained to you that he figured out Anya could read minds not too long ago when she kept beating him in stone, parchment, shears, (please I’m sorry😭), hide and seek, and their little treasure hunting games. What he didn’t tell you was he also used her to out scam the guy who shuffles a gold token and bets money you’ll never find it.

It explained to you why Sukuna was just giving her looks and she was vocally responding.. it left you to worry how many of your thoughts she had actually heard. 😭

On a side note- here are some cannon events in the process of Anya growing up 😭😭

As a baby she was menace 🥺 she liked biting/trying to chew her dads fingers when he’d poke her cheeks. Not a cute nibble either, she’d dive in predicting the “If you eat his finger you’ll get stronger”

When she took hold of his finger the first time he was in love. That was his daughter and she meant the world to him. Then she dug her nails hard into his skin making him wince and immediately clip her nails. But when you don’t clip her nails because you're scared you’ll hurt her he always ends up with a scratched chest and hands when she’d try to take hold of something. She’s the reason he started wearing shirts even if they were uncomfortable on his massive arms 😔

Was kinda glad she didn’t sleep in the bed with both of you. She loved sleeping on his chest and Sukuna did also. But only allowed it when he could put those baby gloves on her.

After hitting age one she loved messing with Yuji and Sukuna while they were sleeping. You continuously went after her picking her up with your hand sunder her arms. She’s let out her baby screams and wiggle her body you could hear your husband’s attitude, “unhand me mother! I crave chaos! Ahahahsgsghshss!”

The older she got the more both of you learned the way Yuji admired his dad but was a total mama’s boy? It was almost the same case. Except she admired her dad.. and was a daddy girl. Yes she loved you and thought the world of you, but daddy’s so cool because he has so many cool powers! 🥺

It didn’t matter if she was sleeping in your arms, she was laughing and having the best time with you. If she even felt or heard the slightest sound, meaning Ryomen was in the room, she would scream and cry for him to pick her and take her with him. The same case as Baby Yu, you were jealous Ryo got all the attention and baby love even if they were attached to your chest most of the time.

Speaking of jealous, Yuji was the most jealous little 10 year old boy 🥹 “MY DADDY!” He’d carry Anya back to you so he could sit in HIS dads lap. Sukuna found it amusing and more often than not bullied Yuji. Which actually led to your funny little schedule where when Anya was briefly awake Yuji would be glued to your side. When Anya was asleep Yuji would run and stick to his dads side.

Sukuna has a permanent dent in his side boob where 2yo old Anya crawled over to him on your bed and then latched on, i don’t mean milk- i mean she saw a mound of flesh and went ‘nom’ He grunted and it took everything in him to not swat her instantly. He sat up after pulling her away. She was dangling by her feet clapping her hands and laughing, Sukuna was pressing his hand to his chest helping himself and cursing because no way he really let this brat catch him off guard and mess him up 😭

Which is also when it hits him, she has no presence because she has no cursed energy. He was disappointed but relieved she’d never have a reason to be caught in trouble 🥹

Here’s a little montage of moments 🥹

An invisible child means invisible crimes. Sure, Ryomen could actively tell where she was. But it’s his child he could let his guard down and close his eyes to think about the things he had to do. Breathing became slower the more he started to relax almost to napping completely.

1…2…3…4… “YUJIII NIII I GOT THE THING”

Kamutoke… she took the Kamutoke

Sukuna was going to get up and chase after her but she tripped and face planted into the shiny floors Sukuna had to pick her up and wipe off her tears and snot while telling Uraume to put up his tool because there was no doubt in his mind Yuji or Anya would kill the other with it by mistake

Anya loves her parents, but when Sukuna is thinking Sinister thoughts she runs to Yuji.

Ex. The four of you went out into the city, Anya was riding on her dad’s shoulders the way Yuji used to. She was patting away on his head when she heard the thought, “I should kill that man, I’ll start by slowly gutting him a- wwaahhhhh” followed by squirming and Anya basically jumping over knocking down Yuji. When you asked her what was wrong she said “…nothing… papa is kinda scary.”

Yuji had to piggy back her the rest of the day when she didn’t feel like walking but she sang her cute little “Family ooting” song

This is both Yuji and Anya when daddy’s home ,

(I’m sorry I’m so bad at writing for girls 😭 I don’t have a niece to spoil or interact with, I’ll have to steal my friend and her little sister next time and play with her 🥹 I’ll do better for next one i promise 😤)

Tag: @sad-darksoul @cyder-puff @satorisgirl @bontensbabygirl @lupita97lm @queen-luna-007 @sakuxxi @mercymccann @simpforyoubitch @certainduckanchor @domainofmarie @najiiix @bakugou-katsukis-wife @amitiel-truth @souyasplushie @mylovelessnightmare @dolliira @ilovemybabies378

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level2janitor · 4 months

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Introduction to the OSR

what's an OSR? it's a game that's kinda like old-school D&D. or is old-school D&D. or is compatible with old-school D&D. an OSR game generally has some or all of the following principles:

low character power with highly lethal combat. in old-school D&D a 1st-level fighter has d8 hit points and a longsword does d8 damage, and you die at 0HP. this is not to ensure characters die all the time but to emphasize the next bullet point:

emphasis on creative problem solving. most situations cannot be solved by straightforward use of your abilities (such as charging into every situation with swords drawn, if a fighter), so the game tests lateral, outside-the-box thinking.

emphasis on diegetic progression. spells are found, not obtained automatically on level-up. you get XP by finding gold more than killing monsters. most of your cool abilities come from magic items. making alliances & hiring followers is encouraged.

focus on managing inventory, resources, risk, and time. the players are constantly faced with meaningful decisions; this is the heart of the game.

very sandbox-oriented. the focus on creative problem solving means the game must be accommodating to players taking a course of action the GM didn't plan for. use lots of random tables to generate emergent story. some elements of new simulationism.

high tactical transparency, i.e., the optimal course of action is rarely system-specific, and ideally very possible for a new player to intuit.

usually semi-compatible with old D&D, but not always. usually rules-lite, but not always.

what does the OSR mostly NOT do?

focus on character builds. these change the focus too much to be on the rules than the fiction, can create situations where stuff everyone should be able to do is an ability locked to one class, and impede tactical transparency.

resolve everything with a die roll. combat uses dice to be scary, unpredictable and most importantly not your default course of action. everything else should bring up dice rarely - dice are your plan B when your plan A fails. the best plans need no dice.

use linear storytelling or put players into a writer/GM role. linear storytelling gets in the way of the decision-making so core to the playstyle; letting players write details into the setting is mutually exclusive with them discovering it.

rules for everything. 400 pages of crunch is worse at simulating a believable world than the GM and players' shared understanding. OSR games rely constantly on GM ruling.

mostly still applies to all the above. making your system a "pure" OSR game comes second to doing what's best for your game.

System recommendations

old D&D or a retroclone

old-school D&D - or old school essentials or basic fantasy or swords & wizardry, which are old D&D's mechanics repackaged with quality-of-life tweaks (and the upside of not giving WOTC your money) - are usually the go-to when recommending someone's first OSR game. they're actually not my first pick, though!

PROS:

very complete, with more robust rules than a lot of the lighter games on this list.

100% compatibility: most OSR adventures are statted for old school essentials. converting them to other OSR systems is usually simple, but not 1-for-1.

easier to find games for. anyone interested in the OSR space knows what old school essentials is.

CONS:

jank. these games largely still have weird saves, level limits for non-humans, some still have descending AC, etc etc. it's not that bad but it is there

i hate thief skills. lots of essential dungeoneering actions are locked to the thief class as abilities, with abysmally low success chances. this is stuff i prefer being handled without a roll. thieves in this system suck and make everyone else worse at dungeon crawling by existing.

there's just lots of really cool shit in other systems i'm about to go into that you just don't get here

Knave 1e and its various hacks

this is a 7-page super-lightweight system that boils everything down to just the essentials.

rolling a character takes like 5 minutes. roll stats, roll gear, roll traits, go. done. it's great.

characters are defined entirely by stats and gear, no classes. wanna be a fighter, have high strength and carry a big sword and armor. wanna be a wizard, have high intelligence and fill your inventory with spells. item slots are elegant and pretty limited.

initiative is instant: roll d6. 1-3, monsters go first. 4-6, PCs go first. swingy, but god it is so smooth and shaves like the most boring 5 minutes off of every combat

monsters are so very elegant. old D&D gives monsters a "hit dice" rating to determine their HP, e.g. a 3HD monster rolls 3d8 for hit points. knave takes this number (HD) and uses it for attack rolls and saves (aside from exceptionally bad/good saves), so a knave statblock looks something like this.

spells are all one or two sentences long & extremely easy to remember.

7 pages is so light. i have the system basically memorized.

DOWNSIDES: there's no dungeon crawling rules (standard for meatier OSR games & something i consider essential) and no real bestiary, though the second point isn't a huge deal cause they're so easy to make. it also kinda assumes you already know how to run OSR games, so there's very little real advice or guidance.

KNAVE HACKS

knave 1e is in creative commons & comes with an editable word doc for you to publish with modifications, so there's a ton of variants (there was a spreadsheet of them somewhere, but i can't find it).

Grave is a favorite - i'm two years into a grave campaign and it's fantastic. it's a dark-souls-y version of knave with some really elegant innovations.

you have a set number of deaths before you for-reals die, as every character plays an undead as is dark souls tradition. makes it good for OSR beginners! being able to tell when you're close to your final death is really good - it lets you emotionally prepare for losing your character & raises the stakes more the more you die. (though honestly you should probably cut the number of extra deaths in half, it's super generous)

XP and gold are combined into one resource, souls. legendary creatures drop big souls you can make into magic items. this has ended up being the coolest thing in my current campaign. my players love finding powerful souls to make into magic items it's so fun

uses preset packages of stats/gear instead of knave's rolled ones, filling the role of more traditional character classes. has the wonderful side effect of not making you get stuck with low stats cause you rolled bad one time.

you have stamina equal to your empty item slots. you spend stamina on spells if you're a caster, or free maneuvers (on top of your attack at no action cost) if you're not. it's super elegant.

there's 3 classes of spells: wizardry for intelligence, holy magic for wisdom, and witch stuff for charisma. nice and intuitive.

there's a page of 50 magic items each a couple sentences long. this PDF is worth it just for the magic items.

DOWNSIDE: see the downsides for knave 1e. all still apply.

i enjoyed grave so much i made a variant of it with the dark souls bits removed (and some dungeon crawl rules added!) to use for my standard fantasy campaigns.

Knave 2e

sadly knave 2e is not purchasable yet (i backed it on kickstarter so i have access, though). but when it comes out i highly recommend it.

much larger and denser than knave 1e. it finally has dungeon crawling rules, it has GM and player guidance, everything is refined and the layout is so so nice and readable.

combat is a bit more interesting than 1e. you can break your weapon against an enemy to deal max damage. you get a free maneuver on high attack rolls.

there's rules for stuff like alchemy, warfare, building a base. it all kicks ass.

there are so many goddamn tables. i rifle through it anytime i need inspiration.

DOWNSIDES: i personally can't think of any! it's a very complete good functional system.

Mausritter

you play tiny little mice! in a world full of big dangerous things that want to eat mice. cat = dragon. you get it. what more could you want

the mouse thing is just super intuitive. you get the dynamic between you and the big scary lethal world. fantastic OSR game to introduce kids

nice and robust ruleset; nothing feels missing

tons of super nice GM stuff! faction rules, tools for rolling up hexcrawls and dungeons, plenty of tables

super clean readable layout. font isn't too small to avoid being intimidating. guidance is really nice and clear.

combat is autohit. super fast & lethal.

100% free

look mausritter is just. good. i wanna run it so bad someday

Worlds Without Number

sort of a middle ground between OSR stuff and 5e.

lots of classes, at least in the paid version. the free version comes with just the warrior, expert and mage. there's feats and more of a focus on builds than most OSR games. if you like more mechanical build variety than a typical OSR game, this is a great game for you!

extremely good multiclassing. y'know how in most games if you just mash together two classes you think are cool you'll end up with a total mess? not here! every combo is viable and works fine! easily the best multiclassing of any game i've touched

an absurd amount of GM stuff and tables. easily more than any of the other stuff i've praised for also having them. but personally i haven't dug into them as much, so i can't really comment on them

skills the way modern D&D has them. you roll dice and try to beat a target number. i don't tend to like rolled skills, but most people do, so if that's your thing WWN has them

DOWNSIDES

the layout is terrible. everything is a huge wall of text with very little use of bold text or bullet points to draw attention to the important bits. the table of contents has like 15 things in it for a 400-page book! i couldn't find any of the paid-version-exclusive classes for like a month after i bought it! looking up rules is a nightmare.

the way the default setting handles "evil races" is like an exaggerated parody of all the problematic aspects of how D&D handles it. like, it wants so bad for you to have an excuse to genocide sentient free-willed people. but at least the default setting is easy to chuck in the trash

Dungeon Crawl Classics

the goal of this system is to take all of the crazy gonzo moments people remember playing old-school D&D in their childhood and turn all of that up to 11 while cutting the stuff that doesn't add to that. i think a lot of its innovations have ended up kind of standard in newer OSR stuff (like fighters getting maneuvers with their attacks), but it still has more to offer.

the funnel: you start the game with four randomly rolled dipshit peasants that you then throw into a meatgrinder to get horribly killed. you pick one of the survivors to be your 1st-level character.

maneuvers: fighters roll an extra die with each attack that gets bigger as you level. if it's a 3 or higher, you get to do a cool thing on top of your attack. pretty standard for OSR games, but this game popularized it!

crit tables: fighters also get more crits and nastier crits as they level. every crit, you roll on the crit table. maybe you chop off a dude's arm. maybe you just knock them over. maybe you shatter their shield. it's very cool

spell tables: i don't really like roll-to-cast mechanics, generally. but DCC goes so all-in on roll-to-cast that it still looks fun as hell to watch. you cast a fireball and maybe it goes how you want. or maybe you explode, or you nuke everything in a half-mile radius, or from now on you permanently ignite flammable materials you touch, or whatever. casters just have to put up with turning into a weird mutated mess across a campaign

there's no dungeon crawl rules, no encumbrance - this game is all about the big over-the-top wacky shit, and is not really interested in the more down-to-earth number crunching. it's more in the you-die-hilariously-all-the-time area of OSR than the you-avoid-death-through-clever-play area. not really my thing but the system knows exactly what it wants to be and i respect it

iron halberd

this one is mine! as the author i'm not qualified to tell you what isn't good about my system, so just assume it's worse than i make it sound, but here's a bunch of the selling points

semi-random character creation where you flip back and forth between rolling dice and getting your own input. roll stats, pick ancestry. pick starting gear kit, roll different dice based on which kit you picked. etc etc. stats are random but all equally viable (no rolling incredibly low or high stats). every time i run this game the character creation is a hit. seriously go roll up a character it'll sell you on the whole thing

you start out a lot stronger than a standard OSR character but grow way more slowly. i don't like 4th-level characters being 4 times as strong as 1st-level ones; HP never gets that high. emphasis is more on diegetic progression instead.

way too many subsystems for alchemy, crafting, strongholds, warfare, renown, rituals, likes 9 pages of magic items, a whole subsystem for becoming a cleric mid-campaign. i couldn't help myself i love this shit

in my current campaign we had a player permanently sacrifice some max HP to become a necromancer after deliberating on whether that's a good idea for like thirty seconds, which instantly made me think my necromancy system is a success

also free

Adventure recommendations

(in rough order of size)

Moonhill Garden (by Emiel Boven): look at this. look at it! this is like the best template for a little dungeon in an OSR game. all of the little factions are tied together. this would be a great oneshot to introduce people to an OSR system with.

A gathering of blades (by Ben Milton): a system-neutral, one-page sandbox. i ran this for an iron halberd game and it went super well. lasted like 7 sessions. highly recommend.

The Waking of Willowby Hall (by Ben Milton): a single dungeon with a million things going on. it's super chaotic with half a dozen different factions crashing into each other and a big angry goose. highly recommend, especially for kids

The Black Wyrm of Brandonsford (by Chance Dudinack): small sandbox with a fun fairytale vibe and a very fleshed-out little town. and a big nasty dragon.

Evils of Illmire (by Zack Wolf): this is a very dense, entire campaign's worth of hexcrawl in a very compact package for like $5. it doesn't do anything particularly new, but the value-for-money is absurd and it's a really good template for how to do a sandbox if you're used to 5e adventures

Ask me anything!

if anything here is unclear or intrigues you, send me asks! i love helping people get into OSR games. i'll link frequently asked questions here if i get any.

#osr #nsr #ttrpg #d&d #iron halberd #knave #worlds without number #dungeon crawl classics #mausritter #l2j archive

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jimhopperlova · 7 months

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- Power Damage (18+)

18+ MDNI!!

Pairing(s): helping!jim hopper, helpless! fem reader

Summary: when reader comes home after a long shift at the diner, she finds her power is non-existent. she asks the local chief to help, but find out he helps in more ways than one.

Warning(s): large age gap (reader is 22, hop is 41), masturbation (f receiving), unprotected p in v.

i hope you enjoy! ive wrote something similar to this, but this ones a lot better. more love making than actual sex.

‘10 minutes and i can take a nice hot shower.’ you said to yourself, finishing up cleaning the tables you had. you had to be the busser and the server of course, cause why not? you sighed, continuing to look at the clock ahead of you. no, you can’t. the more you look, the more time went by slower.

it was nearing 10 o’clock, you of course having the closing shift. you didn’t mind as your boss was a nice gentleman. he always offered you free food, made sure you were comfortable in any setting, and if any customers got out of line, he was right there in tow. you couldn’t ask for a better boss.

“alright, looks like it’s your time to go. get outta here. get some rest.” speaking of, your boss had said to you as you finished your last table. you smiled brightly, the shower sounding more and more better as the day went on. you quickly put the dirty dishes and rags away where they needed to go, and quickly hung your apron up on the employee break room door. you hurriedly grabbed your winter coat, hat, and gloves. ‘warm shower, warm shower.’ you shouldn’t ask for anything too much, because then your hopes are shattered.

“what?! no!” you had managed to see that your power was off. the lightswitch didn’t work, and the oven didn’t work either. you wouldn’t be able to be warm. you did everything you thought you could to steer away from this very moment. you lived in the midwest, weather was always the worst. when people say it’s bad, it’s worse. and when people say weather is nice, its bad. there was no way of fighting off the inevitable.

great. now what? you weren’t about to sleep in your cold car nor your cold house. start a fire in the house? probably not the smartest idea. go over to everyone’s homes you know of and beg mercilessly to stay at their house until your power’s back on? better idea. but you knew that you would need to get the power back on, so you had managed to helplessly drive to the police station. you didn’t know of anyone capable of helping.. not even a handyman. maybe you can be desperate, especially when talking to the chief.

chief jim hopper was a regular at the diner. he stumbled across you one night when you were his server. clearly you made an impression on him, but of course, you are oblivious, so you didn’t really understand. until tonight when you are talking to flo, hoping the nice old lady would understand.

“listen, i.. i stumbled across a situation and i don’t know of any handyman in town. is there a way you guys could help me? i know you’ll probably tell to screw off and suck it up, but.. i really need your guys’ help. maybe give me a directory?” you asked flo in the most desperate voice you could. you were shaking of cold, and this situation just made things worse.

“ms, our hours are closed. we are only open for emergencies,” flo spoke to you, you looked at her in despair. but this was an emergency! you couldn’t be warm to save your life. maybe you could stay here overnight? pretend to be a criminal. break something. “but.. i can see what i can do.” flo then spoke. you looked at her with a smile, probably thanking her a million times. you sat down on one of the chairs, hugging yourself to try and keep yourself warm. you then watched as a door opened, and out came a tiring chief. you wanted to say hi, but things were more important right now.

“(y/n), what are you doing here? everything alright?” the chief had then asked you, and you could only smile lightly. things were alright you supposed, but you’re freezing in your boots. literally!

“oh, hey jim. yeah, uh.. everything’s fine. except my power’s out, as well as my pipes are burst. maybe i’ll just stay at a motel..” you told yourself. you hadn’t even considered that. you involuntarily facepalmed yourself at the thought of a motel. how dumb could you be?

“well.. i’m just headin’ out now. maybe i’ll stop by and check it out.” jim mentioned. you looked up at him with a wide smile. coming to the police station was the smartest idea you could have thought of.

“sir, you have a call waiting for you-“ flo started to interrupt, basically telling him not to help you. all hope was gone. he had a job to do afterall, not bother with your stupid pipes. oh. you didn’t think that could be dirty until you truly thought about it. your face emitted a deep blush, and tried your best to ignore it.

“it’s alright, flo. this shouldn’t take long.” jim said again, looking down at you as in a ‘let’s get out of here before i get pulled back into the office’. you smiled up at him and stood, leading him out to your car.

“thank you, jim. it really means a lot.” you told the chief who could only smile softly, heading to his blazer. you hopped in your nova and headed towards your home. you didn’t think anything would come between you and jim, so you only treated him as a friend. but you basically owe him a shit ton of favors for doing this for you. you didn’t know what you would do without the chief.

“yep. busted,” jim muttered as he looked underneath your home. you cursed to yourself, shaking your head. god damn it. curse your mother for having old pipes. your mother practically gave you this house in her will, and you had a three bedroom ranch house at the age of 21. being an adult sucks. “and the powerlines are froze. until they thaw out, you’re kinda stuck.” jim explained further, and you shook your head. of course. could this get any worse?

“shit. uh.. okay. i guess i’ll drive around town to see if any motels have vacancy. thanks for helping me, you didn’t have to.” you told the chief who could only shake his head and run his hand through his hair.

“save the gas. the one motel in this town is full. almost the whole town is outta power,” jim explained again, bearing the bad news. so the night really could get worse. you cursed to yourself about a million times before jim could only laugh. you looked at him in bewilderment, wondering what his problem was. “you don’t have any friends or somethin’ to crash with?” he asked you, his hands placed on his hips. you shook your head, hugging yourself again.

“nope. i’ve only been here for a year, if you can’t recall my sob story when you were last at the diner,” you explained to jim. you had a bad time shutting up about how you ended up in hawkins, especially when they ask you about how you ended up here. when someone was new to the town, it sparked up the whole entire town. you didn’t stop explaining where you came from for about a month. “i have coworkers, but they have kids and their house is full. that is if they have power. honestly.. i just need a warm shower.” you laughed softly, and jim lightly scratched the back of his neck, almost in thought.

“well.. my place is trashed. but if ya need.. you can stay. granted, i still have power and water when i get back home.” jim spoke. those were the words you needed to hear after a long debate in your mind of where to go. you smiled brightly and looked at jim with probably the biggest smile.

“oh my gosh, thank you so much! thank you, thank you, thank you!” you told the man and hugged him tightly, despite if he wanted to or not. you let him to and looked up at him. “i’ll go grab some clothes. i’ll be back.” you told him before heading inside your cold home. seconds later, you emerged with a backpack full of clothes for tomorrow and your pajamas.

“leave your car here, you’ll be safe.” jim told you. you couldn’t help but laugh and hop in the car next to the chief. the drive to his place was silent. you couldn’t quite place if it was a good quiet, or a bad quiet. but it was definitely an awkward quiet. meanwhile, jim was deep in thought. his mind continuously wandered about whether it was a good idea to bring you to his place or not. the last thing he wanted was to be judged, especially by you.

for some reason, you were never able to escape his mind. those small little talks and bright smiles at the diner did him dirty. maybe that’s why he continues to go there when he isn’t swamped with paperwork. your bright eyes and that widened smile pulls him right back into the diner, always making sure he left you a generous tip. you were young. and see, that was another problem. he was a 40 year old man, watching over the town, protecting it. you were merely 22, high hopes still ahead of your future. and maybe that’s why he has hesitated asking you out on a proper date.

finally, you two arrived at jim’s trailer. it seemed kinda homey on the outside. however, inside it seemed like a druggie’s fever dream. pill bottles, beer bottles, beer cans, dirty clothes, just.. everywhere. you weren’t expecting the chief to be clean by any means (he’s a busy man), but you didn’t expect it to be this dirty.

“s’cuse the mess,” jim spoke before he looked around and tried his best to move some stuff around so it wasn’t so messy. he didn’t expect to bring you to his trailer tonight, but if he had to be honest, he was glad he had the opportunity to. “you can place your coat and stuff on the couch for now.” he also instructed. you looked around and didn’t know what to say. nice place? nice.. bottles of beer? instead, you took the latter.

“uh.. thanks again for letting me stay. it was really nice of you.” you said awkwardly before disgarding your coat and hat and mittens. you placed them on the couch, feeling the warm air. finally.

“course. not a problem. uh.. bathroom’s over there. i’ll let you take the bed tonight.” jim spoke and you immediately looked at him. ‘i’m used to sleeping on the couch, anyway’ jim had said to himself internally.

“no, its okay. i can sleep on the couch, i don’t mind.” you smiled brightly before excusing yourself to the bathroom. you shut the door behind yourself, and looked in the mirror. you didn’t look too bad, but you didn’t look hot either. the stress made your forehead vein pop, and hopefully after the shower it would be alright. you sighed before disgarding your clothes you had on that day and grabbed the pajamas from the backpack, placing them on the bathroom counter. you turned on the water and felt the way the warm water graced your fingertips. ah. not enough hot water, though.

meanwhile, the chief was sat in his usual spot in the recliner. beer in hand, he channel surfed the tv. he was doing well, he thought. refraining from your good looks, doing his best to not stare too long. but.. could you blame him? it was you. and now you were in his trailer in the shower. naked. he tried his best to let the tv distract him from going in there and spying on you. he really was dirty.

finally, you came out of the shower. you were in a white plain t-shirt and some plaid pajama pants. the perfect outfit to keep warm. you noticed jim was sat in his recliner, watching tv. he was still in his police uniform, and obviously.. you thought the uniform was hot. his pants made his crotch area tighter, so if there was any chance he had any attraction to you.. you would know. the unform defined his muscles well, and he always demanded respect in it. you didn’t know, but you knew a power play was hot.

“i’m uh.. done. it was really nice, thank you,” you told jim softly, slowly reaching to couch and sitting down. jim looked over at you and nodded, going back to the tv. fuck, it was going to be awkward, wasn’t it? what could you do to break this silence thing? “uh.. how’s your job treating you? good, i hope?”

“what?” jim asked and looked at you. you shrugged and looked over at him, hoping to let him know you were just trying to start a conversation. “it’s uh.. same old song and dance. how ‘bout the diner?” he asked you, taking a drink from the beer can. he then reached for the pack of cigarettes, lighting one up. another thing you’re attracted to. the way the cigarette was in between his lips. fuck, you really wished you were that cigarette right now. “hello?” jim had piped up again, and you had to bounce back from your trance. you laughed and shook off the thoughts.

“sorry, uh.. was thinkin’. um.. it’s alright. i mean, it’s gotten better. i got a pay boost, and new clientel has been tipping better.” you told him. you smiled over at him, and jim couldn’t help but smile back at you softly. cigarette still in hand, he took another hit from the cigarette, letting the smoke exhale from his throat. he looked relaxed.. but stressed. you weren’t sure what that was, but you knew that he was kind enough to let you stay in his trailer. you shouldn’t pry.

“that’s good. glad you’re getting what you deserve,” jim spoke. a few more minutes and more staring at him smoking the cigarette, he finished what he was doing and stood from his recliner. he shut the tv off before turning to you. “alright, it’s ‘bout time i head to bed. please, just.. sleep in the bed. it’ll make me feel better.” jim ordered you. you sighed and nodded, standing as well.

“i’m sorry, i just don’t want to be a bother..” you said softly before jim could only think, ‘why would you be a bother?’ nope, personal feelings had to stay far away from his mind. “goodnight, jim. thank you again.” you spoke softly and slowly made your way to the bedroom. jim couldn’t help but watch as you walk to his bedroom. those pajama pants fit you well. he shook the thoughts away again and started to disgard himself of his uniform.

you fell onto his big bed. it was massive. it was cozy, and even smelled like him. despite the piles of dirty clothes and pill bottles everywhere, it felt nice. it would feel way better if he was next to you, though. you sighed and decided to try and fall asleep. an hour passes though, and you’re still awake. not only were you in a foreign place (you didn’t sleep well at places you never stayed at before), but your mind was wide awake. it wouldn’t shut the hell up. thoughts of jim coming in here and making sweet love to you wouldn’t leave. you did your darndest to not masturbate in his bed, but maybe it would relieve some pressure.

you sighed and slowly rolled out of his bed and slowly made your way out to the living room. jim looked asleep on the couch. you ducked behind the corner hoping to not wake him. he looked way less stressed. his eyes were closed, the way his belly went up and down from breathing.. at peace. but you could now get a better visual of him without his uniform on. and for some reason.. it turned you on even more. you swallowed past the lump in your throat and swaddled your way back into his bed.

thoughts danced in the front of your mind, not escaping the wandering of your eyes. what if jim came in here? what if he confessed his feelings and made sweet sweet love? you kept thinking of how he would taste on your lips. his beard would tickle you a little and he would taste of beer and cigarette smoke. but when his head ducked lower, the beard would tickle you even more. lower on your stomach, lower above your navel.. lower on your cunt that is aching to be touched. you swallowed and decided to give it a shot.

your hand ducked underneath your pajama pants, circling around the nerve that wanted to be touched the most. you imagined jim’s finger there instead, the thick digits circling around it. praising you on how good you were doing, confessing his love to you. you let out a soft moan, the thoughts swirling around in your mind. before you knew it, your finger danced around your entrance. you entered one finger inside of you, clearly that not doing much. thoughts of him telling you to beg for it, for him to add just one finger.

“please, please, jim..” you sighed out, begging jim in your mind. you didn’t think you would be loud externally, but it was loud enough for jim to stir in his sleep. he awoke to soft moans coming from his bedroom, curiousity getting the best of him. he stood slowly and walked over to his bedroom, almost forgetting you were in there. but the sight in front of him added a glow to his eyes he hadn’t seen in a long time.

sure, he has pleased lots of women in his spare time. but none of them could have compared to you. the way your hand was underneath your pajama pants, the way your eyes were closed with pleasure.. the way you moaned his name. and my, was that the sweetest way he could have heard anyone say his name. it was almost angelic the way you sounded. he had to palm himself at just the sight, but it came to a shock that he was already hard. what did you even do to him?

“please, i need you, jim..” you moaned out. fuck. jim was at a loss of words. he took a moment to run his hand through his hair, thinking what he should exactly do. he wanted nothing more than to replace your hand with his, whisper sweet nothings in your ear.. however, this was different. he had to remember his morals. “jim.. i’m- i’m gonna cum.” you shrieked out. he wondered if this was some kind of trick, and you weren’t really lost in your mind. except, you really were. you were oblivious to the fact that jim was spying on you. you know what? screw his morals.

jim slowly made his way inside the room, trying his best to not startle you. he wanted to surprise you if you really were about to cum to the thought of him. but when you heard footsteps, your eyes shot open. there was jim, standing there. right in front of the bed. had he been watching you? before you could make any excuse, his hand cupped your mouth. you looked at him with wide eyes, honestly afraid of what he might say. what he might do.

“shh..” jim shushed you, his eyes dancing down to where your hand rested. it was still there, but paused. he looked disappointed. “keep goin’. it’s okay.” he had whispered, and you looked at him confused. you didn’t dare question what he just told you to do. your hand started to rub circles at your clit again, that feeling of cumming being lost. you were startled, and you didn’t think you could muster up that feeling again. especially when he was watching you now.

“jim.. i need.. your help..” you whispered at him, looking at him with doe like eyes. the glow in them.. jim couldn’t resist. he slowly took your hand away, and instead replaced it with yours. his large fingers started to dance around your clit, adding that pressure you were so desperately after. you hummed softly, your eyes shutting softly. the same thoughts filled you, but with the man that was doing this to you, it made it all that much better.

“feel good?” jim whispered in your ear. you nodded desperately, your hands gripping at the sheets. you couldn’t control your moans at this point. you opened your eyes and looked at jim.. he was mesmerized by the way you reacted to his touch. he was curious to see how you would do with himself inside you. he slowly laid down next to you, so he had better access. the motions continued, but you needed more.

“jim.. i need your fingers.. inside me..” you spoke desperately, looking up at him. jim could only accept and nodded softly, one finger sliding inside of you. you moaned softly at the way his finger already managed to find your g-spot, it feeling all too good. he thrusted his finger inside of you, of course slow. he wanted you to be prepared for his cock.

“want another one?” jim asked you, and you nodded. he smirked softly before he looked down at you. he was simply drunk off the way you moaned for him. the way you yearned for his touch. “beg for me..” he instructed and you immediately obliged.

“please jim, i.. i need another finger.. need to feel you..” you moaned out, looking up at him. the two of you locked eyes, and you felt like you were about to cum. that familiar feeling was started to rise, but you needed just a little more to help. “p-please. need your finger to cum..” you begged once more, and immediately he obliged. the second finger added more than what you bargained for. you practically came immediately. “f-fuck, jim- i’m.. cum-cumming..!” you shrieked out, your hands gripping at the sheets on his bed. you were full of him.. his bed, his scent.. his cologne.. and now his fingers deep inside you.

“that’s it. you’re doing so good..” jim praised in your ear. he felt himself get even more hard at the way you spasmed around his fingers, if that was possible. his cock now ached for you. he wanted to be deep inside you, claim you as his. he didn’t care how young you were.. at this very moment, you are all he wanted. and will continue to be, no matter what anyone had thought. once you finished on his fingers, he slowly slid them out of you and licked up the juices. he looked down at you, and noticed how relaxed you were. normally, he would just stick his dick inside and be done with it. but it was.. you. no, he was going to savor this.

“jim.. need.. more of you..” you had managed to whisper out, despite how exhausted you were. you really did want more of him. no matter how overstimulated you got, you needed him inside of you.

“don’t worry, it’s comin’ sweetheart. just need.. to savor you..” and before you knew it, his lips captured yours with his. it was deep, hard, passionate.. and he tasted just like you thought he would. except, a more.. whiskey taste. you were drunk off his lips, the two of you moving in sync. your hand had then palmed at his boxers, feeling the way his cock ached for your touch. you were in heaven. “shit. don’t do that. i need to be inside you..” he hummed against your lips, not wanting to stop. your lips were so addictive. they tasted of coffee.. not only were mornings for coffee and contemplation, it seemed nights were too.

you moaned softly against jim’s own, your hands traveling from his boxers to his chest. hairy. but you didn’t care. he was groomed exceptionally well. his hairy chest fit him, and you were glad for that. eventually, jim took things to the next level. he laid you down fully onto the bed, him on top. he broke the kiss to look down at you, his blue eyes meeting yours. you looked absolutely beautiful.. he wanted you to know this.

“so.. beautiful..” jim hummed out softly before his head ducked down to your neck. he left feather-like kisses, before he left some on your collarbone. you moaned softly, before his hands had found the bottom of your shirt. you helped him take it off, and you didn’t think jim could look more happy until now. his head ducked down to your breasts now, twirling one nipple with his tongue. he made sure the leave equal attention to the other as well, making sure you were left satisfied.

finally, he was getting somewhere. you watched as he started to slide down your pajama pants and underwear. he flung them somewhere in the room, looking down at you. you looked up at him in wonderment, hoping he would do more. you nodded up at him, in hopes he would.

“please, jim.. please.. need to feel you..” you spoke softly, and this was all he needed to hear. he disregarded his boxers, leaving him naked in the moonlight. you watched as he stroked at his cock. it was thick, veiny.. it looked like the perfect puzzle piece.

“i got you. you’re all mine,” jim whispered out before spitting on his hand for lubrication, and then slowly thrusted inside of you. your eyes got big, and he wasn’t even fully inside you. “oh.. fuck. i’m not gonna last long.” jim admitted with a soft chuckle. you fit him so well. so wet, so tight.. it was fucking perfect. you are perfect.

“oh.. jim..” you moaned out softly. you looked up at him, watching the way he shut his eyes softly. when he felt you were well adjusted, he slowly thrusted in more. and eventually, slow thrusts in and out. he then leaned lower down at you, hitting that spot so.. perfectly. “mm.. jim.. it feels so good..” you moaned out, his lips captured onto your neck. his thrusts were gaining at a decent pace now, but he didn’t want to just fuck you. he wanted to make love with you. his hands found yours, and he gripped them tight. your eyes were now shut softly. you then realized.. this was the best sex you have ever had. it was more emotional, more intimate.. chief jim hopper really did have a thing for you.

“fuck.. baby, you’re so.. good. so fuckin’.. perfect..” jim moaned in your ear, getting high off of your own moans. the way you called out his name. the way you accepted his cock inside you. the way you wanted him, and the way he wanted you. with these thoughts in mind, he was getting close, and you were too. again. “i can feel you gettin’ tight.. you gonna cum for me?” jim had asked you, and you immediately nodded.

“y-yes, jim.. i’m gonna cum for you.. fuck it feels.. so good..” you had moaned again, feeling that familiar feeling in your tummy. before you knew it, you were spasming around his cock, you milking yourself on his cock.

“shit, baby. so good, so fucking.. good. can you take my cum?” jim had asked you, and of course you nodded. you wanted his seed deep inside you. you wanted to be his, and wanted nothing more than for him to claim you. with that, he felt himself become undone. your scent, your moans, the way you fucking breathed.. it was over. he emptied himself deep inside you, spasming around your own aching cunt. after he was finished, he laid on top of you, but not fully. he didn’t need you to be struggling to breathe.

“jim.. that felt.. so good.” you managed to break the silence after a few moments, and all jim could so was chuckle. he placed a kiss on top of your head, making sure that you knew you really were safe. with him.

“you’re more than welcome to stay again, y’know. anytime you want.” jim had whispered in your ear. that was his way of telling you his true feelings about you. he wanted you. and you were now grateful for those old pipes your mom put on the house.

#chief jim hopper #david harbour #jim hopper #jim hopper x reader #stranger things

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strawberry-crocodile · 1 month

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Since u talk about transmisogyny a lot on here, I'd like to confess: I did follow transandrophobia blogs for a while on here because I thought, well, it's nice that there is a specific word that makes it easier to navigate to find specific things relevant to my own experiences, surely? I realized after a while the only time these topics really get brought up is as a defense to why the term has value, rather than engaging in discussions relevant to actual transphobia against transmasculine people. It felt like it was never elaborated upon beyond vague mentions of these things, and then otherwise, it was discourse about the word itself. As you can probably expect transmisogyny was only mentioned in passing, so I didn't understand much about it for a long time. I believe it was your posts deconstructing transandrophobia that made me understand why, exactly, the word wasn't useful at all, and also why this framework exists largely as a way to attack trans women who criticize the word, whether the people involved are aware of that or not (relevant to say their ignorance can be just as harmful!!) Once I realized that, and how little transandrophobia truthers listen about transmisogyny on top of that, it made all of the discussion about solidarity just ring hollow. Ended up blocking the handful of people I knew from that circle. it sucks that communities like this exist but I want to let you know I really appreciate you discussing transmisogyny openly, I imagine it's hard, stressful and exhausting in a lot of ways, and I don't think it's something just anyone could/should/has the means to undertake, but I hope you know that it does make a difference. People like you making an effort to discuss topics in good faith and going through the ordeal of re-explaining things does wonders for those of us willing to listen. Still listening now! so again, thank you, and I hope you're taking care of yourself <3

Hey this is really awesome to hear!! I try to keep myself approachable and relatively non-judgmental for just this reason. People who are willing to listen and consider other issues and change your beliefs i love you

#blogodile

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ftmtftm · 10 months

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as a straight trans man I'd like to add to the discussion surrounding sexuality and being "accepted" as trans - straight trans men such as myself do still get painted as predatory. we're subjected to the ideas of the "predatory lesbian" trope, and then amplified by the fact that we're "just straight men preying on innocent women". the transandrophobia presents differently, but is definitely still there - and it fucking sucks to see other trans guys perpetuate homophobia and take out their internalized transphobia on gay trans dudes. especially if you're non-passing or take pride in your trans identity: we get shunned from both queer communities ("you're just a straight man trying to take up queer resources") or ("at least if you were bi I'd feel safer around you"), but in cishet society we face large amounts of lesbophobic assumptions about our sexuality and gender presentation, as well as the garden variety transandrophobia. transhet men also, even by the most accepting queer people, are often pressured toward heteronormativity in our relationships and into being queer in an "acceptable" way even though they do not apply those standards to other queer people. please do not fall into the trap of thinking that gay trans men are the ones who suffer most from transandrophobia, as I've seen just as many gay trans men as straight try to deny its existence. while I know you mean no harm by it, please don't create the same sort of binary axis of "we have it worse" while trying to destroy that same sort of binary wrt transandrophobia and transmisogyny. we're on the same side here. this post isn't meant to shame you or be a callout of some sort, just a friendly reminder :)

Oh absolutely!!!! I'm sorry my post missed the nuances of your experiences, my goal with it was more to say "I understand why people might see the flawed logic for that argument with straight trans guys, but it's completely not applicable when you try to interact with it outside of heterosexuality and I can speak to that directly"! It was definitely not to say that straight trans men aren't also often treated as predatory or in transandrophobic ways if that makes sense? Basically I was just acknowledging the line of logic and saying "This is flawed and here's one of the way I directly know it is flawed"!

I apologize for not being clear enough with that!! I definitely don't think gay trans guys suffer the most though, we're brothers in this, we've gotta be there for each other!

Thank you for sharing your experiences though! They're vitally important to talk about and good for everyone to remember! Especially because y'all really do experience brunt of lesbophobic transandrophobia and also a lot of ostricization from the broader queer community!! I don't think people realize that even though (false) safety can be found in straight trans men's assimilation, that doesn't mean they necessarily want it or even truly benefit from it because of the lack of community it can provide.

#asks #anon #transandrophobia

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himbeaux-on-ice · 1 year

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some new non-comprehensive thoughts on Pride and the meaning of warmup jerseys

(the following is drawn largely from my twitter thread)

honestly, i think the Panthers have like the Sharks taken the best route you can in a bad situation. and there's relief for me in that.

don't cave and undermine all the planning and work you did in order to cover for a few homophobic players. let it land on them. do not stop for their sake. thank you.

idk, personally the teams that backtrack on the jerseys entirely to cover for homophobes in their ranks leave me feeling way more angry and disillusioned than the ones where 90% of the guys are still out there in those jerseys and just one or two dipshits loudly sat out. i would have been way more disappointed by an entire organization making the decision to coddle and shelter homophobes than i am by the revelation that 2/18 players suck but the rest of them got with the program.

maybe that's a low bar. but yeah, i'm weirdly relieved that the jerseys made it to the ice at all. that so many chose to wear them.

it's like. at least some people cared enough to stick by us and not be cowards, y'know? even though dipping out was an option, somebody answered in the affirmative when asked if they'd stand with us. several somebodies did, actually.

when teams pull back entirely, we don't even get that much.

people talk about the "epidemic" of homophobia in the NHL and whether it should change how/if teams do Pride nights, but i would take an epidemic of 1-2 idiots per team sitting out of warmups over having an epidemic of all teams deciding not to do Pride at all because of those few. i would, genuinely.

are they "hijacking the events" or "taking away from the meaning of them"? idk man. these days bigots show up where queerness is visible to spout their bigot shit regardless. i have two pride flags in my hockey twitter display name, trust me, i know. at least when it happens like this, there's also people and an organization supporting us instead of just leaving us to deal with it alone.

does finding out some guys are homophobes suck? yeah. but we always knew these people existed. they're just showing themselves out loud.

and that blows. and it hurts.

but also, the entire rest of the team and the organization showed who they are tonight by not protecting or accommodating them, too.

i'm seeing so many people feel hurt by the two dumbasses who wouldn't stand beside them rather than encouraged by *every* other member of the team who *chose* not to cop out. and like. i get your hurt. but everyone else CHOSE to stand with us.

think about that for a second. sitting out was clearly an option here, if they put up enough of a stink. and yeah, two guys took that out. but *every other player* DID NOT. on the Sharks and Flyers, all but *one* guy apiece got with the program. some of them even did really meaningful community work!!

and the Panthers franchise decision-makers stood by their choice to do this, loudly and with meaningful activism attached, in FLORIDA, even when two of their own players pulled the religious protest card and copped out.

i extremely, massively respect that. i really do.

maybe i'm just a terminal optimist by nature, but. to me, what we are seeing is that when given the choice, so far the vast majority of players on these teams are still choosing to participate when given the option. when it's not taken out of their hands entirely by people upstairs.

the outliers suck, but they are just that. outliers. and i hope they feel like it.

personally, i'm not leaving this sport i love just because it's got a stubborn lingering jackass infestation. they can't have it. no, *you* move.

also, shoutout to the guys who extremely voluntarily opt-in even though it's not even their team's Pride night. genuinely means something

people vocally being asshats is discouraging. yeah. it always is. it stings.

but all is not lost. not by far. keep your head up. and stay loud. 💜

#long post #pride #change hockey culture #no arguing in the notes or i'll turn reblogs off i mean it #very okay to reblog

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beevean · 2 months

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I think another reason I don't like the writing in Frontiers is that it feels... egotistical? Like idk the entire air around the games just gives off "Oh here's the game that will save us from the big bad 2010's writing, so praise it!"

Also just how I feel the more dramatic parts feel trying too hard, like when Sonic is slowly being corrupted, I felt next to nothing... the game felt like it was grabbing me by the shoulders and going "See this scene??? See how much pain Sonic is in??? FEEL SOMETHING!!!"

I use the word "pretentious".

Frontiers clearly aims to have a different story than usual. Event-wise, it's pretty paper thin: Sonic rescues his friends and uncovers the mystery of these new islands he's stuck in. No big deal, Sonic games don't need a big complex plot. But unlike, say, Heroes or Generations, Frontiers has little to no levity, the music is bombastic in an attempt to inspire awe and wonder, and it's heavy, heavy on character interactions. Introspections, even. Amy, Tails, Knuckles and Eggman are supposedly eviscerated by the writing, with all their fears and doubts and desires exposed, like a drawn out character analysis and, yes, a blatant rerailment from the terrible Pontaff games. Tails and his arc that is literally "wow I sure sucked in Forces, what was up with that" is the most obvious example of this, but I have talked extensively how Frontiers feels like a huge love letter to SA1 in the worst of ways.

(and the unnecessary dig at Baldy McNosehair that is also the second time in a row from Flynn :\ let it go, man)

Like, alright. Let's be real. Games like ShTH, '06 and Forces wanted to be taken seriously too. They did not succeed at it, for various reasons. And while ShTH makes me laugh for how tonally dissonant it is, and I don't think Forces is as cringe as it was made to look like, I still think '06's story is largely boring and a bit tryhard for the series, although it has a few funny/cute moments. So yes, overly serious games are not new in the series.

But Frontiers really gives me a whole different vibe. Like it doesn't just want to be taken seriously: it wants to be praised as a pivotal moment in the series. Perhaps it's precisely because of how it solely exist to "fix" characters, how it shoves as many references as it could as candy for the old-time fans (when one of the complaints of the Pontaff games was that they felt disconnected), how everything about it, and now I'm also adding the gameplay, feels like it doesn't exist for its own sake, but to be "a step in the right direction". Like that it's the biggest accomplishment it can reach. It's a step in the right direction. It's better than what came before. We are fixing the series. Right?

(I wouldn't mind the attempt to show how Sonic was suffering from the corruption. I genuinely like the scene where Sage keeps questioning Sonic's resolve and he just keeps going with a gritted smile. I sure mind how the game was rushed into giving it a non-conclusion lmao, and Final Horizon didn't really fix things.)

#sonic the hedgehog

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rosequart · 1 year

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really enjoyed the new spiderverse :) the kind of movie that makes me go "damn i love movies"

my initial non-spoilery thoughts

loooved everything about the opening sequence. gwen's watercolor world is so responsive to her state of mind, transitioning from pastels to darker shades to more water-drippy and impressionistic

the web-slinging/swinging sequences are so fucking cool. just watching miles move through the city is beautiful—the effortless way in which their bodies move along with the camera, the way the web looks; spiderman has never looked better. you just cannot do this shit in live action.

i never got tired or exhausted by the visuals (maybe except until the fight sequence on the rocket/vertical train thing, but that's more action scene fatigue) which shows how well the movie is visually paced

in clumsier hands the self-referential humor ("villain of the week") and multiverse explaining ("canon events") would've been such a pain, but it's implemented really well. they clearly know when to be comedic vs. serious. no "that happened"s here!

i think the first half of the movie is much better paced and themed—i really enjoyed the family drama and miles and gwen just hanging out. once they reach the spiderpeople HQ it starts to feel bloated

more plot/spoilery stuff under the cut

it's hard to discuss the themes because it's half of a movie—luckily i went in knowing that, i would've been upset if i didn't know beforehand lol

the vulture at the beginning was very cool. i want to see his leonardo da vinci world

fucking love the spot. a villain who desperately wants to be taken seriously paired with a hero who quips and doesn't give him the time of day, driving him further down the villain path. great stuff

the only live action bit i liked was with the convenience store lady from the venom movies...otherwise it was pretty jarring. i do not need to see crying andrew garfield in my animated spiderman movie

i was happy to see peni :) her characterization and design was one of the more disappointing things about the first movie so i'm hoping her larger role in the third installment will be more in the vein of edgy mech anime/NGE

the slow realization that miles ended up in the wrong universe was soooo good i felt so smart and shocked when it happened. "what's comicscon" indeed

this movie had like 5 different endings lol

the actual ending rubbed me the wrong way in the implication that a world without spiderman (read: law enforcement) devolves into Crime and Anarchy and i get that it's an easy way to mark the universe as The Bad Timeline but it still sucks imo.

...which is a weird contrast to the spider society where they're clearly doing a "miguel's strict law enforcement is harming him and everyone around him" thing but i guess the movie is just going along with the age-old good cop myth. also hated the direct comparison between the spider mask and a cop badge. overall i think the movie's stance on cops and law enforcement is a clear attempt at having their cake and eating it too (especially noticeable with spiderpunk's existence). unfortunately that's probably par for the course for spiderman stories and superhero narratives at large

so interested in what they'll do with prowler-miles. i'm hoping he has an important role in the next one

for me this movie really disproves the idea of superhero/multiverse fatigue

hope all the artists who worked on this get a nice and long vacation. because my god.

#spiderverse #across the spiderverse #atsv spoilers #spiderverse spoilers

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threecirclingbuzzards · 19 days

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Y'know, sometimes you just see three posts back-to-back and you gotta go make your own rant.

I swear the way people talk about all trans people, but in this instance I will be focusing on the language around transfems because it's my experience, has gotten noticeably worse, even in so-called "ally" or "positive" etc. spaces. And it fucking SUCKS.

Like we've seen so many attacks on the community lately, the political divide, and thus legal rights, getting worse for a LOT of us across the world, but especially America because y'all are a large vocal group in English spaces online [that's a separate thing I don't really want to get into how American politics have bled across the border and how that sucks but it has and it does.], and I feel like it may partially be because of how much worse things have been getting that what passes as "fine" has degraded? I mean I know some is the rampant ""infiltration"" of communities [read: blatant and not so blatant psyops] but I feel like a lot of it is also just general community tiredness and by extension "allies" with less-than-savoury internal biases toeing the line a LOT more.

Of course this is a lot about low-grade invalidation, dismissal, or fetishization, and the overlap of those attitudes within the fringes of trans spaces, it's a little hard to give concrete examples but it's everywhere, but I feel like there's also an immense feeling of a growing narrative of infantilization, and of an "obligation" to identify trans people, even in public, without recognition of the fucking danger of doing so? especially fucking now?

I feel like the easiest way to put it is that "allies" or whatever. "Liberals," "Tumblr users who act like they have radical politics," etc. seem to feel very comfortable acting as if binary trans women [notable distinction here] are fully just separate to, and I have to put it this way because it's the energy "real [cis] women," and the inverse for trans men, and I won't even get into how non-binary people are often treated as fully non-human. Like it's everywhere! It's a noticeable sentiment of how people behave I've seen! Like of course you misgender us offhand, you don't see us as we identify!

For the infantilization, I'll offhandedly mention that recent report that's really done a number in TERF circles, but even beyond that. Idk maybe it's a personal thing but the things I've read from purported allies in terms of say, acting like we're all 20-somethings with little agency and the money for hyper-feminine clothes and who are functionally femboys [this gets into the chaser shit but I'm gonna scoot past it.] in most respects is truly disgusting.

I also have a bone to pick with the recent term I've seen "clocky" which leaves such a bad taste in my mouth as 1. kind of an infantilizing way to say visibly trans, I don't care for it and it's used in phrases that do feel like the author is swapping out some variation on faggot or tranny, and 2. belies a shift in the "necessity" of identifying and acting upon that identification of trans people in public. Like that's not a safe move to make, and I feel presents a feeling of entitlement to trans women's bodies as they exist in public space? which is... entirely already the major issue with the anti-trans movement at present?

I love identifying with other trans people I meet, which means there is a necessity for public interaction and identification, but I feel like there's a shift in someone's transness being the SOLE MOTIVATOR to talk to someone to "show that you're one of the good ones." As if self-auditing and continuing to better yourself isn't enough, you need to be absolved of wrongdoing by the relevant minority. Fuck off. I'm just trying to get a damn sandwich. It can be dangerous to identify people in public spaces, both in the "this person in public is hanging around in a space, others may do heinous shit later with that gained knowledge" and in the "this person in public is around people they have to interact with long term, who may not be aware of their transness." I just hope we can sometimes leave recognition to a distance, or to discussions that DON'T act under solely trans contexts.

Solidarity to my fellow trans people, I love y'all. Life goes on. We will persist. Despite all the bullshit.

Sincerely, a very tired butch trans woman.

#trans rights #transgender #trans #transfem #transsexual

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deepseametro · 29 days

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Sure, there are lesbians who won't date bisexuals, but also as far as groups goes, lesbians are a relatively small group and I wish there were zero biphobia there (still a long way to do and it sucks), but there are also bisexual women that you could date out there and I find it unfair to blame lesbians on bi women not dating women.

The group that includes bi/pan/multi attraction women is way bigger than the lesbian community.

I understand there's pressure to be in m/w relationships, gay people experience that pressure too, which is why so many lesbians are still stuck in comphet or were for so long. I'm not saying the issue doesn't exist, it does and I'm sorry bisexuals feel that pressure, it just doesn't feel fair to put it on lesbians.

I mean nowhere did I say that lesbians are the only biphobic group of people in the world or even the most biphobic group of people in the world... That post was in response to a specific kind of attitude I encounter in specific kind of communities, and those kinds of communities can often be majority lesbians.

I was not in fact blaming lesbians for biphobia. Nor was I blaming lesbians as the reason bi women have a hard time finding wlw relationships. I was responding to a specific attitude among the lgbt community at large to mock bi women who are dating men.

I was responding to a specific attitude among the lgbt community at large, including the lesbian Community, who view and talk about bisexual women as if we're more likely to cheat on them, as if we value them less than other lesbians because we're also attracted to men, Etc. Really basic biphobic bullshit.

And I was specifically responding to the idea that the reason bi women mostly date men is that they're not actually attracted to women that much or aren't actually interested in centering women (whatever this means). And I was pointing out that maybe the reality of the situation is that you know, not only does homophobia fucking exist discouraging same-gender relationships period - bi people ALSO face great hostility from within the LGBTQ community bc of our bisexuality.

And to be perfectly clear: I don't think it's wrong at all for people to have these preferences. I consider myself bi4bi. But there is a huge difference between having a preference for dating a certain kind of people, and saying wholesale you won't date somebody who's bisexual. Saying that finding out someone is bisexual negates your attraction to them. Etc. That's biphobic!

Like yeah obviously we can date each other. We do it all the time. But lesbians being a small group of people I don't think excuses their biphobia and I don't think is a good reason to not call it out. I also know there is an equal problem with lesbophobia among non-lesbians and I recognize the tension between these two groups of people.

But like I have seen again and again on here, for example, lesbians insisting that bisexual women can't be dykes or femmes or butches or whatever. This hostility was a huge factor in me struggling to come to terms w my own bisexuality. Like this is not the only biphobia that exists or even the most pressing issue for us but it's real and worth discussing.

Idk. I get what you're saying and I recognize that. I don't want to seem like I'm blaming lesbians for all the biphobia in the community. That's not true at all. Just that I find this attitude when coming from lesbian specifically extra hypocritical because of the biphobia I've witnessed coming from there.

#Sorry this is a little all over the place #To be clear I love lesbians #theyre a wonderful magnificent part of this community #Which is why when I see biphobia from them it bums me out extra much ykwim

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hairydykecunt · 2 months

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i love this skirt but it’s ridiculous how tight it is, yeah sure it’s a size small and i’m like a large but god DAMN it completely takes away any ounce of curve i have. like my hips arent big nor my ass but this shit just makes them look non existent. but my stomach stays the same. but whatever it’s so pretty and it was 3$.

(first of all it’s fine but i hate that my stomach and ass stick out the same amount. Please give me a bigger ass god)

i’ve been trying to make an outfit with it so that i can wear it out but i’m struggling so hard cause i’m not good at fashion stuff and accessorizing and etc. this was like the best i could come up with

and it might be insecurities speaking but i just Dont like rhe way my shoulders and neck look (and the waist and stomach too but tbh i just need to cope through that?)

like i don’t know how to accessorize up there, and leaving it bear feels so awkward, and i never really think abt it that hard but i do have broad shoulders and like, a fatter upper body than lower? so i’m like real squishy and plump in the arm and neck and back and shoulders, and i don’t mind bc again it’s my body forever, but when the rest of ur outfit is like squeezing u in it looks super uncoordinated to not have something up there?

if i had access to whatever i needed to make this outfit look better it would probably be like, a long sleeve floral lace top maybe? and a better corset

sorry for super long post lol i just like talking, and i wnana get better at dressing up, and i really suck at dressing up goth, i’ve just been wearing outfits to see if i can rock with it outside

and also the proper corset i bought kinda blows bc it doesn’t sinch anything so i’ll probably need to buy a size smaller Or make modifications to it (but ill probably just buy another)

if u made this this far here are boobs. thanks soldier 🫡

and this doesn’t matter as much but look at how everything borderline spills out lo

i was gonna just post this but bc of how embarrassingly long it is i’m turning off reblogs just incase. i’d die of embarrassment if this was shared i think. not cause it’s embarrassing but like i’m genuinely just yapping

#kitty talks #and last thought: bodies are really hot and all types should be able to do whatever #but i really wish i had like an hourglass figure for fashion reasons #i just want curves in the right places yknow… god i need hips and ass

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hyenahunt · 2 months

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Obbligato: The Punishment of Kaname Tojo - 8

Writer: Akira

Season: Spring, two years ago

Characters: HiMERU, Jun

Proofreading: Remi + 310mc (JP) & Skyress (ENG)

Translation: Peace & hyenahunt

Jun: 'Course, if you were to think of me as a friend... then I'd obviously be happy about it.

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

HiMERU: Hm... So he speaks like that, does he?

— Well then, I wanted to ask you a few questions.

Jun: Ah, uh... Sure, but why’re you getting all formal with me…?

HiMERU: — One moment. Allow me to search my memory.

You are Jun Sazanami, correct?

Jun: Seriously? You know this shit, so why're you acting like we're meeting for the first time? Tryna act like you're beyond even remembering my name again?

That's pretty nasty of you. To an idol, getting your name forgotten is something worse than death... That's what my shitty old man says all the time.

Well, not that you could even call me an idol, the way I am now.

HiMERU: Mm. Considering your attitude... Are you perhaps a friend of HiMERU's?

Jun: A friend... isn't quite how I'd put it, nah. We're not strangers, either, but I don't think you could really call us friends...

Jun: 'Course, if you were to think of me as a friend... then I'd obviously be happy about it.

HiMERU: Is that so? Nonetheless, it seems as if you do have some connection to him. I suppose this is what they call a stroke of good luck.

Do you know what HiMERU is doing at this very moment?

Jun: 'Scuse me...? What're you going on about? "What he's doing" — well, you're right here talking to me, yeah? What kinda riddle is this?

HiMERU: Hm... Allow me to rephrase the question. Have you heard what HiMERU is scheduled to do today?

Jun: Why're you asking me that? As if I'd know what your schedule is, man.

You're weird as ever, huh?

HiMERU: — Yes. HiMERU is a rather interesting existence.

Jun: Seriously, why do you keep talking like you’re someone else?

... but um, either today or tomorrow, Kazehaya-senpai's planning on standing upon a newly set-up stage within the school.

And you said something 'bout wanting to perform on it too, didn'tcha?

You'd been practicing hard every day lately so you could make the most of such an opportunity if it ever happened, right?

Looks like you're real busy, going all out to the point you've even been skipping class for it.

HiMERU: — Yes. And without our permission, as well. That is what I don't understand.

HiMERU has always been obedient, and never once has he gone against our instruction. Recently, however, it seems as if he's been moving about beneath our nose.

It's rather strange... There are a large number of discrepancies between the reports he's given us and the truth, which is certainly suspicious.

That is why I have taken the time to come here, so that I could meet HiMERU in person and ascertain the truth.

... Just once, I'd like to see HiMERU on stage for myself.

Jun: What the hell are you going on about? You alright? Worn yourself out a lil' too much?

Well, not that I hate that part about you. You may look like a flawless idol and all on the outside, but you're kinda a mess on the inside.

HiMERU: — HiMERU is not only flawless in appearance, but as a whole, isn't he?

Jun: Yeah, yeah. That's what you always say, but it's all just lip service.

You may have the reputation of thriving as Reimei's top idol these days, but I heard that the truth is you're just constantly making mistakes.

Doing stuff like forgetting the names of your colleagues, or messing up with your song and dance...

HiMERU: ...?

Jun: All the higher-ups sweep 'em under the table since they don't want Reimei's name to take a hit, though. The Non-Specials often make fun of you, y'know? They say you're pretty awful.

HiMERU: ......

Jun: But I mean, I'm pretty jealous that you get to even just stand on a stage, HiMERU. You might kinda suck as an idol right now, but with enough experience, who knows, you may become a real one eventually —

Well, just keep doing your best and don't give up. I sure hope you don't end up hitting rock-bottom like me again.

As for me, I'm cheering you on. You may be hard to get a handle on sometimes, but anyone can tell you're real serious 'bout it all.

HiMERU: What are you talking about?

Jun: What?

HiMERU: HiMERU is considered flawless and as the Top Idol by all, isn't he?

Jun: Like I said, that's only what you keep insisting, yeah? You suck ass as an idol, so God knows where you got your oddly high confidence from, man.

Are ya getting carried away with how much people call you a top idol? Or maybe not — you've been this way from the very first time I met you.

HiMERU: That can't be... No, perhaps—

— Jun Sazanami. Thank you for the information, but I must be going — I must ascertain the truth of the matter immediately.

Jun: Sure... Well, what the hell was that all about?

Jun: Haha. Honestly, from our very first meeting all the way 'til now, you've always been completely incomprehensible, huh?

...Everything else in Reimei just keeps changing for the worse, but knowing that at least one thing's constant here helps to keep me going.

[ ☆ ]

← prev ✦ all ✦ next →

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#ensemble stars #enstars #enstars translation #hyenahunttl #jun sazanami #himeru #s: obbligato

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transmascpetewentz · 3 months

Note

'ello there! i know you've posted some about chicago, and was wondering if you'd be willing to share what it's like to live there (without doxxing yourself ofc). i'm a usamerican trans guy and currently in high school, and am looking at where to go (either for college or in general, i'm not sure yet).

i've been beginning to look into chicago for a few reasons. rn i'm in a VERY red state, and aside from the general wave of anti-trans bills, i'm also considering becoming a teacher and staying in a place that thinks trans people existing is pornographic doesn't really mesh well with things like "working with minors." i also know that chicago has a large jewish population, and i might want to convert at some point--no clue if it'll actually happen or not, but i want to at least fully explore the possibility. i'm also a big fan of public transit.

one of my mentors used to live in chicago and speaks very highly of it, but that would've been back in the early 2000s so idk how much of it's changed since then. any knowledge/context/general wisdom you could share would be greatly appreciated :)

trans related:

While better than the deep south, there's still a lot of transphobia here.

A lot of trans teachers work in schools.

jewish related:

Chicago has a lot of Jews but also a lot of antisemites who are open about it in public

It'll be easy to find a group of Jews but non-Jews don't generally make an effort to be educated allies

Most of the Jews here are trans allies too!

public transit:

It sucks. Trains run every 2 hours last I checked, and you basically need a car to get anywhere.

#asks #chicago

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tmnt-obsessed-ace · 1 year

Text

When The World Crumbles: Chapter 15, A Father From Another World

The water fight had been an ok distraction. For a few minutes everyone could pretend that nothing was wrong, everything was fine. And the horrible truth that had been revealed in the Turtle Tank was simply a bad dream.

Just a few minutes to pretend that the thick black tendrils weren't coiled around their throats like a hangman's noose. Threatening to strangle them to death.

But unfortunately all the water balloons were spent, the water guns emptied and the tires of the tank were still needing patching.

The metaphorical tendrils drew tighter as the brothers were made aware of their presence once again, sitting around and waiting for the tank to be fixed.

Which brings them to their current situation, sitting in a back alley with towels draped over their shoulders while the last tire was being patched.

Donatello was holding his younger brother, Raphael and Leonardo on either side of him. Mikey was helping Donnie patch the tire while Raph was on watch duty to make sure no one would see them.

A soft hiss from Raphael came from his left.

"Fucking stop!" The red clad turtle said through gritted teeth though there was no force to his words. Leo rolled his eyes, continuing his work. Some of the stitches came undone, the bandages and Michelangelo's cast got soaked so they also had to be changed though the cast would be changed at the lair.

"I'm almost done so shut up." Leo retorted, ignoring the huff the older turtle sent him. Donatello frowned a bit, grabbing one of his older brother's hands and squeezing it tight.

"So now what?" Michelangelo asked quietly. "How are we going to get back home?"

That was a good question. The recon mission at the sawmill provided nothing but a few new injuries, not to mention a sense of dread that was supposed to die with the Super Shredder.

Because the Footclan was still at large in this dimension. The biggest threat to their lives is still here.

That means…oh god that means that the Shredder is still at large. Just thinking about that made Donatello want to throw up.

It took four years to take that monster down, to finally put an end to a centuries long feud.

He didn't want to go through that again.

He didn't want to bury any more family.

"Donnie?" Leonardo asked, nudging the purple clad turtle. Russet eyes met ocean blue ones, though now they looked so dull like the hue was being sucked out.

When Donatello made a slightly confused noise, Leonardo sighed softly. "We still have to search for possible Kraang hideouts here. But it will have to be tonight." The oldest was squinting against the bright sun. Since when is it ever this sunny in New York City?

"Yeah the damn sun is giving me a headache!" Raphael chimed in, voice strained as Leo worked.

"With the sheer amount of locations we have to search, it's actually better to start as soon as possible." The laptop was pulled out of Donatello's bag and set down on the concrete. The new screen put in just last night was cracked and it was only twenty percent charged.

With a rapid typing of the keys, a file was pulled up on the monitor, an insanely long list of locations and coordinates that made all four turtles cringe tiredly at the sight.

"Woah boy that is insane-it's still going!" Leo shouted as Donatello kept scrolling.

The slider's jaw was hanging open as he stared at the list. Over half of the locations had some kind of caption.

Destroyed. Abandoned. Seized by U.C. Seized by E.P.F etc.

"Ok we'll search them all, see if the Kraang really exist in this dimension or not." Leonardo stated, oh that would be so much fun.

Frantically running from location to location, searching for the Kraang with almost no time to even think about resting.

Again.

"Here we go again…" Michelangelo mumbled, rubbing his eyes with his non casted hand.

"There's no way we're searching all of those locations right? Because that would be straight up torture and surely unneccesary right?" Leo asked as he started fixing a reopened gash on Michelangelo's bicep.

The four older turtles leveled him an exhausted stare, making him straight up cringe.

"We need to be sure." Leo only groaned at that.

"Now you know what we were doing for the past week before we got here." Was Leonardo's response.

His younger counterpart groaned even harder.

"No wonder you guys look like fucking zombies!"

"We could help go through the list!" Raph chimed in, towering over the five turtles.

At least his shadow was blocking out the sun.

"We could what now?" Leo was swiftly ignored.

That would actually be beneficial, these turtles actually know the layout of this New York City. And while it was similar to their own version of the city, it was also vastly different in terms of layout.

And the brightness was cranked up to a hundred.

"Raph look how long this list is! This will take days!" The snapper scrolled through the list, his expression changing from confusion to growing horror. He pushed it aside, trying to keep a smile up.

"No big deal!"

To say Leo gasped would be an understatement. It sounded like all the air was pulled from his lungs with a straw. The five other turtles stared at him in concern.

He snatched the laptop, sprinting over to Donnie and Mikey.

"Anyways your help would be very much appreciated, we'll be able to cover more ground and spend less time lost." Raph smiled brightly, snaggletooth shining in the sun.

"We should split up," All eyes turned towards Leonardo, his three brothers already glaring daggers at him.

"Like that worked so well last time!" Rapahel held up Michelangelo's casted arm, lightly shaking the limb to prove his point.

"Raphael and I will go with the Mad Dogs and scout out the possible locations while you two can go back to their lair."

The red clad turtle in question leaned over his two younger brothers.

He then roughly flicked Leonardo in the forehead.

"Leo, you and Donnie are going back to the lair, Mikey and I will go scouting." The two elder brothers glared at each other.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

Leonardo crossed his arms while the younger duo got out of the crossfire.

"And why's that Raph? I can understand why Donnie's been benched. He got shot with an arrow but I'm fine!"

Another flick to the forehead.

"Oh not this bullshit again! Your knee got dislocated! It hasn't been dislocated since the we were at the fucking farmhouse! You are not walking on it anymore for a fucking while."

Leonardo only huffed.

Raphael growled.

"You can be a real pain in the ass sometimes you know that?"

"The feeling's mutual."

The duo glared harder at each other, refusing to back down. You could almost smell the tension growing in the air.

After a few seconds large hands pushed the two apart.

"Easy now! Look Lee, little Raph is right."

"Little what now?"

Donatello and Michelangelo both snickered at the nickname, oh how they would abuse it later.

"You really should take it easy for a few days, let the leg heal up!"

"If you tear your stitches again I'm replacing them with staples!" Leo yelled, causing the eldest to flinch. He glanced at Donatello, who shrugged with an evil grin on his face. The purple clad turtle was no stranger to using such a threat.

"Look unless you want to damage your knee to the point of possible amputation, a few days of rest isn't going to kill you." Donatello stated, ignoring how his eldest brother flinched at the word amputation.

"Plus six turtles is already a lot!" Michelangelo added, pouring on the puppy eyes, his eldest brother's gaze softened. "Can't exactly be all that stealthy with six, let alone eight!"

Leonardo frowned, he seemed to be considering the options.

Oh Donatello would hope that he would just listen instead of being stubborn. Repeatedly damaging his knee is only hurting him. Besides, it's not like Raphael and Michelangelo would be going on their own.

"Alright Donnie and I will stay at the lair." He said quietly as all the tension in the air dissolved.

"We can discuss plans back home in the lair, let's leave now!" Donnie called out, climbing into the Turtle Tank.

Everyone else followed except for Donatello and Leonardo.

"It's only temporary Leo, besides we should probably start investigating that weird trance you were in." The leader in blue nodded, dread clear in those tired eyes.

Donatello offered his brother a hand, letting him lean against him. Together they walked to the turtle tank, time to head back to the lair.

It's only lunchtime and this day can't possibly get any worse.

Right?

"They just left?" April shouted through the cell phone. Splinter cringed at the volume, April was thankfully not in class at the moment.

"I don't know what happened! They just stormed off!" The rat had a guess as to what happened.

God he hoped he was wrong.

But those haunted looks in teary eyes, the fear, the anger, the grief.

Oh how Splinter was familiar with that look. It was hard to forget when it had also been etched onto his face for so many years.

It would glare at him from the reflection of the mirror, hazy from crying, one time shattered and dripping blood.

The same look he had after his mother…

He shook away the thought, surely that was not the case. Surely the alternate versions of his children hadn't lost someone…

He could take a guess at who that someone was and it hurt.

Alternate versions of his children…

He knew eventually it would happen, but hopefully it would be when his boys were all grown up, when they no longer needed him.

But their alternates looked so young, yet somehow twenty years older.

"You still there Splints?" April asked, snapping the rat out of his thoughts.

"Yes! Yes, I'm still here, April. I just got lost in thought." He glanced at the thin cracked hole in the far wall from Leo's katana when it apparently went nuts.

The ruined blackboard had been moved to the trash while the portal projector stood untouched, a horrible burnt smell still coming from the metal.

"I tried calling them but all I got was a text from Mikey."

"What did he say?"

"It was just a photo of Donnie looking extremely ticked off."

Splinter huffed out a tired laugh, there was hardly any amusement behind it.

"I just hope Purple didn't kill Blue while they were gone."

"Well it seems like Leo is a dead boy walking. And if anyone can hold a grudge longer than him it's Donnie."

Splinter didn't know if it was a good or a bad thing that he wouldn't have to witness the fall out.

"Hey Splints I gotta get back to class, I'll swing by at around 3:30 pm ok?"

"Of course April, I'll call you if the boys come home!"

"See you then!" April hung up, leaving the old rat alone with his thoughts.

And the photos strewn out all over the floor.

He frowned, what a mess. One by one he picked up the photos, all taken over the years of raising his boys.

He picked all the photos of Leo.

All of the photos had something in common.

In every single one, even the massively faded ones from when his baby blue was just a tiny infant, his eyes were green.

They were always green. Noticeably green, especially compared to his brothers who all had brown eyes.

The green eyes that shined against his red stripes.

So why had they flashed blue?

Splinter looked at the last photo, one repaired with a piece of tape and the dried blood cleaned off as much as possible.

The photo of his children's alternates' 18th birthday.

He stared at the photo, specifically at the blue banded turtle. The one with dark blue eyes.

Alternate baby blue…

There was rumbling coming from the garage as the Turtle Tank pulled up. Splinter put his photos back into the scrapbook and the other photo back in the kitchen.

Then he scrambled to the garage, the sight of the Turtle Tank making his shoulders sag in relief.

The first to step out of the tank was Orange, who upon seeing Splinter's face instantly cringed.

"Mikey? Is everything all right?" Said box turtle gulped, ducking his head back into the tank.

He whispered something into the tank, his body slightly trembling. He soon moved away from the tank, whining softly.

Ok so something happened out there.

Next came Blue, a miserable look on his face. His eyes were back to bright green.

"Oh hey pops." He said tiredly, voice sounding so drained.

"Blue what happened?"

"It's…oh boy how do I explain this?"

Just as he said that, the four new turtles all left the Turtle Tank. They all looked down at Splinter, eyes weary and bodies shaking.

Resisting the urge to scoop these children into a hug was beyond difficult.

The blue clad turtle stepped forward, obviously trying to put as little weight as possible onto his right leg.

"Master Splinter." He began, words clipped and all too forced. "I would like to apologize for our earlier encounter-"

"It's alright Big Blue, no hard feelings, it was a rough morning I'm sure." The older looked a tad bit stunned at the nickname but seemed relieved that he wouldn't have to continue.

"You four," Splinter gestured to the four of them, who seemed to be doing everything in their power to avoid looking at him. "Are more than welcome here until we can get you back home my sons." The four turtles flinched.

They flinched, like they saw a ghost. That same haunted look returned in full force, eyes already watering again.

Dear god what happened to these children?

"Right, well we should have some lunch and then get going!" Red chimed in as the four older turtles quickly got away from Splinter. He ignored the already faint sniffling for the moment.

Wait, get going?

"But you just came home!"

"And we have about a bajillion places to search to see if the Kraang exist here!" Splinter gasped, his heart jumping to his throat.

The Krang…here? They escaped the prison dimension?

No…god no the Shredder was almost too much but the Krang? The boys weren't ready! Even with their ninpō…

When he looked up his sons were gone, their voices echoing faintly from the kitchen.

The old rat scurried over, before stopping in front of the door. Shocked gasps echoed from beyond the metal.

"-why didn't you say anything?" One of the new turtles asked, barely contained fury clear even muffled by the door.

"Because it's not a big deal!" Baby Blue replied.

"Uh yeah it's a big deal! Leo, you said your katanas were acting up all week!" Red hissed. "You've been having nightmares all week!"

"Leon, you can't keep secrets like this from your family!" Big Blue said sternly. There were very obvious mumbles of disagreement from presumably his own brothers.

"Hypocrite."

"Excuse me?"

"Pot calling the kettle black as the saying goes."

"Way to tell on yourself Leo."

"So what?" Oh Blue you done it now. The kitchen erupted into furious yelling, all directed at the slider.

"Dude what the fuck?"

"Zip it shortstack, I got the whole katana thing under control!"

"Are they still vibrating?"

"Huh?"

"Are your katanas still vibrating?" There was a pause, a faint shing of the blades being unsheathed.

"...no…No! Of course not!" A soft buzzing sound could be heard from inside the kitchen. Splinter's eyes widened before he groaned. If he could hear it from beyond the metal door it must be extremely loud in the kitchen.

"LEO!" "LEON!" All seven voices shouted in sync.

"So it's vibrating a little. No biggie!"

"Ok that's it! You sir need to learn that every dum dum action you take has fucking consequences!" A hum followed by the familiar pulsing of Purple's ninpō made Splinter cringe. Guess he will have to clean up a body.

"This looks like a job for Dr. Delicate Touch!" Orange declared. Blue all but screamed, the kitchen door flying open as the slider scrambled out of the kitchen, Purple and Orange chasing after him, weapons drawn and ninpō flaring.

"Michelangelo gets to write my obituary!" Blue yelled as he sprinted through the lair, Orange and Purple laughing maniacally as they gave chase.

Splinter glanced into the kitchen, Red had his head buried into his hands, groaning at his younger brothers.

Two of the older turtles, Short Red and Big Orange were wheezing from laughter. The former was even banging his fists on the table.

Meanwhile the other two, Big Blue and Big Purple were bickering to each other, voices in a hushed whisper.

"I take it Baby Blue was lying through his teeth again." Splinter said with a tired sigh. The five turtles went silent, staring at him.

Red gulped, not so subtly glancing at the four older turtles with a worried expression. He leaned over to his counterpart, whispering something Splinter could not hear.

No one spoke, the room thick with tension once again. Splinter frowned at the older turtles, eyes tracing over the bandaged wounds, every scar old and new. The visible bags under exhausted eyes.

His heart ached for these children.

Eventually it was Big Orange that spoke first.

"Dudes, is it just me or does he sound like Tigerclaw?" He asked tiredly. Tigerclaw? As in the move?

"What?" Splinter squawked.

"Wait wha-oh he actually does." Big Purple replied, staring at Splinter with wide russet eyes.

"Who's Tigerclaw?" Red asked.

"A mutant tiger that was the Shredder's top henchman." Raphael said before glancing at Splinter. "Fuck I can't unhear that now."

"The Shredder had a mutant tiger as a henchman! Ok that is kind of cool!" That mental image was both insanely terrifying and one of the most badass sounding things Splinter ever heard.

"Not so cool when he helped beat me into a three month coma." Big Blue muttered far too casually, left foot tapping rapidly against the kitchen floor.

Both Red and Splinter's eyes went as wide as dinner plates.

"W-what?" Suddenly there was a crash, followed shortly by a drawn out screech from Baby Blue. Red groaned, quickly excusing himself from the kitchen to deal with them.

Leaving the rat alone with alternate versions of his sons.

The four scooted closer together, yet again avoiding Splinter's gaze.

It was obvious what the problem was.

That didn't make it hurt any less.

"I…I am no longer alive in your world am I?" He dared to ask, voice gentle with these poor children.

Four nods in perfect sync, eight eyes shining with tears.

"Oh my sons…" Splinter trailed off as he approached.

That was it, the floodgates have been opened. Big Orange hiccupped out a sob, burying his face into his hands as more bubbled up. Short Red pulled him close, rubbing his shell with his hand while he tried not to cry.

"Papa…" Big Orange choked out, shattering Splinter's heart into millions of pieces.

Big Purple whimpered, leaning against Short Raph while Big Blue had an arm protectively over his shoulders, furiously rubbing his eyes dry.

"It was two months ago, but we're doing ok." The lie was so obvious. A pitiful attempt at sparing his younger brothers some dignity. After all, they were crying in front of a stranger.

Even if that stranger was a version of their recently deceased father.

"I know how horrible it is to lose a parent when you're so young." Splinter hopped up onto the counter so he was eye level with the four. "My mother died when I was just a young boy."

He cupped two of the turtles cheeks, Short Red and Big Purple. They were the closest to him and unfortunately he only had two arms.

"Losing someone you love. It hurts, it hurts for a long time. But eventually the pain will fade. It never really goes away, it will always be there but not as much as it is now." His hands shifted to cup Big Orange and Big Blue's cheeks, though Splinter had to shift around a bit to make that possible.

"I know there's nothing I can do to bring your father back, but if I can help lessen that pain I will because you are still my sons, no matter what world you come from." Eight arms wrapped around Splinter, the chairs scooted around so he was squished between the four turtles.

All four were sobbing into Splinter's robe, shaking like leaves in a storm. He smiled sadly, somehow getting his arms free to rub their shells. He was vaguely aware of one of them whining "papa" over and over. That just broke the rat's heart.

He just let them stay like that for a long time, even though he could barely breathe with how hard he was being squished.

These poor boys need it, need their father, and if Splinter has to lose circulation in most of his body and get squished into a pancake to give them that comfort then so be it.

Although, Splinter never expected that he would become a father of ten.

An hour later, the four warm colored turtles all left.

Leo had been grounded from missions until the issue with his katanas was actually fixed, with Donnie also staying behind in his lab.

The lair was much quieter, given that three of the four problem children were gone and Leo was pouting. Well that's what you get when you lie your ass off.

Donatello had claimed the beanbag next to Leo, currently typing a mile a minute on his laptop while the slider beside him continued to make obnoxious popping sounds with his mouth.

Like he's been doing for the past half hour.

Leonardo glanced at the two, given how much Donatello's eye was twitching it was only a matter of when he would snap.

The eldest turtle quietly chuckled, leaning back into his own beanbag. He looked up at this Splinter, who was fast asleep in his armchair in front of the TV, covered in cake crumbs, having long since passed out while watching some show Leonardo didn't really care about.

So different from his father.

Short, portly, far messier, and far more relaxed if his insistence that Leonardo not call him Sensei outside of training.

Leonardo would respect his wishes but couldn't help but wonder why? He and his brothers always referred to their father by Sensei, maybe a bit more than necessary but regardless it was a sign of respect.

He was so incredibly different from Leonardo's sensei, his father, that if he wasn't a mutant rat Leonardo would assume they were different people.

That was only one of the many differences between this dimension and home that tugged at the blue clad's turtle's heartstrings.

And the similarities hurt even more, like Splinter's gentle gaze that was filled with love for sons so far from home.

Even when they would eventually go home, their Sensei, their father would not be there. Not anymore.

Leonardo sighed and sunk back into the beanbag, turning his attention to his aching right knee.

The bruise was straight up mocking him at this point.

Sure it got dislocated but the joint had been reset, there was no need to bench him over this!

He shifted a bit, wincing as the joint said no. Fuck you for even trying.

Logically it made sense that he would be left behind. He could barely walk, let alone jump from rooftop to rooftop. And the turtle glider was still broken.

Still didn't make it any less unfair.

He should be out there with them, fighting alongside his family, protecting them from danger.

He has no problem risking his own life but risking the lives of his brothers?

The thoughts were shook away, Raphael and Michelangelo were more than capable of defending themselves. Plus Mikey and Raph were with them. Leonardo had seen them fight against Meatsweats, they were exceptional ninjas with actual magic powers!

The four of them would be fine.

There was a muffled squeak from a certain red eared slider. When Leonardo looked over he had to stifle a laugh.

His younger counterpart had a pillow squished over his head on the floor, the purple clad turtle's laptop sitting on top of it while he typed as if he wasn't using Leo's head as a mini table.

"Leelee help." Said slider whined pitifully.

"You're fine." Leo wriggled in response, though he couldn't do much.

"Is this all I am to you? A table? This is so not fair!"

Leonardo couldn't help but laugh, while his brother didn't seem fazed in the slightest.

"You laugh? I've been completely dehumanized and you laugh?"

Leonardo only laughed harder, he could practically hear his counterpart pouting underneath the pillow.

Just then something metal tapped Leonardo on the shoulder. He looked up to see the culprit was one of Donnie's metal pincers in his battle shell. He was holding some kind of devices in his hands.

"Lee, Don and dum dum-"

"Hey!"

"Would you three please come to the lab? I have some tests to run." Donnie said, voice laced with both excitement and clear anxiety.

"Tests?"

"Are you gonna stick a needle in me?" Leo asked, muffled from the pillow.

"Perhaps…" Well that was reassuring. "Maybe for a blood sample." There was a pop, followed shortly by a squawk from Donatello. Leonardo looked over, the slider had retracted his head and limbs into his shell, the laptop and pillow nearly falling to the floor.

Leonardo rolled his eyes, attempting to stand up when his leg ached with protest. Oh…right.

"Are you alright-" Leonardo cut Donnie off with a wave of his hand, straightening his leg out and taking a breath.

He forced his mind to clear into nothingness. No fear, no thoughts. Only energy swirling around in the void.

Energy to be repurposed.

Exhale…

Inhale again.

Hands held up, locking into the first pose.

"Rin." He began, the energy, his energy, swirling around for him to command. "Kyo."

"Uh what are you doing?" A voice, Leo's, vaguely asked. It was pushed aside.

"Big Blue?"

"Toh. Sha."

The energy, warm and pulsating like a heartbeat flickered softly around the turtle.

"Kai. Retsu." A glowing white aura surrounded Leonardo, his hands vibrating with the power. Warm…safe…all the wounds over his body went numb for a second.

"Jin." Both hands cupped his right knee, focusing the energy into the joint. The nerves went rigid, the shock making Leonardo tremble.

"Zen" The blue clad turtle concluded. After a second the nerves relaxed, all the pain wisping away into nothingness. He opened his eyes, vision spotty and swirling from vertigo.

He rapidly blinked away the spots, ignoring the light tingling in his hands.

When his vision cleared, Leo Donnie and Master Splinter were all staring at him like he grew a second head. Donatello only shrugged, handing his older brother the cane.

"You are still using this." Leonardo rolled his eyes but took the cane regardless. It really did help, especially when the pain would come back later.

"What…dude what the fuck was that?" Leo gasped as the older blue clad turtle stood up, the cane helpful support.

Splinter was staring at him with wide eyes, a flabbergasted look on the old rat's face.

Donnie grabbed one of Leonardo's hands, carefully examining it under his blue and red goggles.

"It's called the Healing Hands." Leonardo finally said, still feeling a little woozy. He looked over at Donnie, might as well get this over with. "You said you had tests to run?" The softshell nodded, dumbfounded.

"Right! Right of course. Let's just file that away under 'magic that is far inferior to science' for now we have so many experiments to do! Come!" One of the metal pincers grabbed Leo by the ankle, dragging him across the floor as his twin walked to the lab while the slider only pouted.

However when he locked eyes with Leonardo, his expression turned to shock, green eyes wide as he was dragged off to the lab.

Right that was weird.

"Come on let's go Dee." Leonardo said softly, before noticing that his brother's eyes were wide too.

"It happened to you as well?" Splinter asked, staring at the blue clad turtle.

"What?" Donatello grabbed a small compact mirror from the bean bag, judging by the sky blue color it probably belonged to his counterpart. It was opened and held up to the older turtle's face.

The blue clad turtle's heart rate spiked when he saw what had everyone shocked.

His eyes were green.

Well ok not really bright green like Raphael or Leo, more like a dark greenish teal color.

They were still noticeably greener than they were supposed to be.

"Right before Leo left to go get you all, his eyes were…blue just like yours." Splinster said quietly.

Leonardo blinked a few times, after the fourth time the green was mostly gone leaving only a teal tint behind.

He looked up at Donatello, closing the compact mirror.

"We should get to the lab before little Dee gets impatient." His brother nodded wordlessly as they both went to the lab. They could hear Splinter saying something but to Leonardo's ears it was all muffled by the hurricane of thoughts rushing through his head.

His eyes were green! His eyes have never been green before in his life! Ever!

Green…

Leo's eyes were Blue.

They were switching eye colors? What was happening?

Leonardo sighed, maybe they would find answers in Donnie's lab.

Little did anyone know that the simple little experiment would go oh so horribly wrong.

#tmnt 2012 #rottmnt #crossover #tmnt crossover #this chapter was supposed to be short #it is 5000 words exactly #fuck

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trevorendeavors · 1 year

Text

So. That Florida Bathroom Bill, huh?

TW: bathroom bills, transphobia, internalized transphobia.

I ain’t beating around the bush. I will be using strong language here. If that ain’t your cup of tea or if you’re just here for my usual brand of gay fanart and fic, it’s okay to scroll past this post. Really. I won’t judge. This is one doozy of a vent.

For the people in my DMs asking me if I’m okay (as a trans person in Florida considering recent bathroom bill bullshit) I’m just… sitting here with an exasperated sigh.

It’s funny that the first time I hear of this is from a DM from someone on the other side of the world. I’ve been deliberately avoiding lgbt Florida news for some time because the more I think about it, the harder it is to be civil in transphobic conversations.

Last night I was deadnamed in front of a few people, and today at my graduation I’ll likely be deadnamed in front of a whole convention center. That’s what I get for not changing my name legally, huh. Oh well. Didn’t wanna go through all the paperwork just yet (in case I go for a different name) so I’m stuck with the one I’m sure I don’t want.

So again, I try not to think about it.

But yeah. It sucks.

Honestly? The bathroom bill doesn’t change much for me. It’s still the same shit as always.

The one time I went into the men’s restroom, I freaked out a cis guy so badly (poor dude was genuinely scared of ME accusing HIM of something bad) that I never did that again.

As for women’s restrooms (the one I most frequently use) that’s a whole other deal. Most days, I don’t pass. I’ll just go out and say that. I have a high voice, boobs, and a bit of hips. Some days I dress really feminine too, so it only makes sense. No one here is going to buy “see I LOOK like a woman but no see I’m secretly a ‘man but not quite’ inside but I wear makeup as a kind of exaggerated cosplay of a gender I am NOT, y’see?”

I don’t want to have a nuanced discussion of gender in the bathroom. Most people 30+ in age don’t even know what non-binary is and barely get the concept of trans. As much as I love being and educator and advocate, after a long road trip I want to piss and get on with my life. Also cis men have told me the horror stories of male bathrooms (how do you get shit ON the ceiling????) and then I’m thankful to have been “born a woman” or whatever.

Most days I don’t think about it too hard. But on my more dysphoric days or when on the blessed days I do genuinely pass more masc - when I go into the bathroom looking like this:

I genuinely don’t know which bathroom to use.

It’s embarrassing. Especially when there’s no family restroom available. And when I go to the women’s restroom, I sometimes get these looks. Brief, surreptitious glances they think I don’t notice. To ease tensions, I lift my pitch and give a compliment. I even puff out my (binded) breasts slightly as if to say, “Yes, I have tits and a pussy, does that soothe your cisnormative and petty fears that I would assault you?”

Jesus, some days I wish I could say that quote outright. But I can’t, and I know it’s not fair to them. They’re scared, I get it. I remind them of a traumatic experience. Sometimes, certain people who have nothing to do a trauma invoke fears of it unintentionally by raising their voices or saying something off or even existing. But that’s MY responsibility to fucking deal with that. Other people can’t help existing.

By and large, people with transphobic tendencies here are usually nice. Beyond, nice even. They’ll help you host a spontaneous ice cream party. They’ll buy you allergy meds when you’re choking. They’ll take you in after your mother kicked you out. Like I said, genuinely sweet and kind people.

Which makes it harder when they accuse trans people of transitioning to skirt military drafts, to cheat at sports, to deal with mommy issues. When they equate gays to sex crimes (yes, the ones you’re thinking of). When they refuse to call you your full name. When they call you a baby who refuses to clean her pooped diapers.

I try to be nice. But by god, is my patience waning…

By. Fucking. god.

I’m tired of the way it’s affected me. Making me feel worth less than cis folks, like my feelings matter less. Even worse, I hate how it makes me jealous and spiteful towards younger trans folks in better situations. Younger trans folk I don’t understand. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not an excuse to mistreat them the way I was mistreated. And I’m genuinely glad that they’re living a better life. I have to work on these thoughts, it’s my responsibility. It would be nice, though, to live in a world where I could devote more energy to celebrating our collective existence instead of surviving it.

That being said, I’m grateful for the people here and in person who have stuck by my guns. The people who check in on my when shit gets worse in terms of politics.

What helps most?

What really helps is when people get mad WITH me. For so long I was told my anger was something to be stowed away, to be quietly extinguished with calm words or relieved by some masturbatory exercise of civil discourse. You know. Where you get off to talking civilly but don’t actually get anywhere and you still have to live in a world that was just as transphobic as before. I just want people to be pissed WITH me. To share in my anger and frustration. To join me as I slam the desk, flip the table, and cry to the heavens,

This fucking sucks

Right now this matters to me even more than action. These check ins, sharing in my anger - it helps, it really does. Makes me feel less alone in the world.

#Trevor screams #Trevor talks #Godspeed if you got through this absolute motherfucker of a vent #tw: vent #tw: transphobia #TW: internalized transphobia #TW: some suggestive language towards the end #Florida #Florida bathroom bill #trans bathrooms #ron desantis

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