#so. wendys pony | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ckret2 · 1 year

Note

👀 I want to hear more about this Bill AU

You were the very first person to send me an ask about the Bill AU, and it was an open-ended question, so I've been saving your ask special for... a fanfic. IDK how often or how much I'm gonna write actual full fic for this AU but for now, here: the first half of Bill's reunion with the Pines family. (Attempted murder included.)

####

February 25, 2013

The vengeful demon standing in the door of the Mystery Shack possessed only four items in the universe:

Two safety pins.

A time tape tied around his waist like a belt.

And a tunic he'd fashioned himself in the style of an ancient Greek Ionic chiton, folded and pinned so perfectly that the wearer must have seen them thousands of years ago when they were at the height of fashion.

Soos couldn't identify an authentic Ionic chiton. All he could tell was that the lady at the door was wearing a toga made out of a bright purple Pony Heist children's bedsheet.

Soos laughed, flashing the tourist a double thumbs up. "Hey! Awesome toga. That should really be like a thing. Imagine if we all wore togas. We could just wake up, roll our bedsheets around us like a burrito, and go out!"

Distractedly, the tourist answered, "Careful, you can't tell when Big Fashion is listening in."

"Haha. Who?"

The tourist didn't reply, and she hadn't looked at Soos once; instead, her gaze was darting around the shop searchingly.

"Are you shopping for something specific?" Soos asked with his best customer service voice. "Post cards? Snow globes? Weird taxidermy thingamajigs? Pants?"

"Where are the Pines?" the tourist asked, casting a sharp look at the "employees only" door, then the vending machine.

"Oh, Mr. Pines! The original Mr. Mystery! Heh—he actually retired a few months ago. The Mystery Shack's under new management!" Soos planted his fists on his hips and puffed up his chest. "It's me, I'm the new management."

"But where are they?" the tourist pressed.

"Uhh, he and his bro are somewhere in South America, I think? Some place called... Redacted. But hey, if you really wanna meet him in person, in his last letter he said they might visit for like spring break if the kids can make it up. First week in April!"

"First week in April," the tourist muttered, glancing away from Soos, thoughtfully fiddling with the time tape wrapped around her waist.

"Oh, dude! I've tried to use a tape measure as a belt too! Haha! It worked great, until I bumped the button and it retracted. Yeesh. Hey, do you want a fur belt? We sell fur belts now." Soos turned away, rummaging through the new display next to the t-shirts. "They're all ethically sourced from recycled materials! I bought a bunch of old rugs from the Northwest Mansion to slice up."

Soos grabbed up a fuzzy pink belt. "Check it, I think this is unicorn hide or something. Bet it'd go so good with that Pony Heist toga..."

The tourist had vanished in thin air.

Soos looked around. "Huh." He stuck the belt on a shelf beneath the cash register, in case she decided she wanted it later.

Once all the other visitors had left for the day, and Soos was left alone to clean up, he glanced around the shop nervously. "Is anyone there?" He lifted his broom like a samurai sword. "Hello? Big Fashion?"

Nothing answered. He shrugged and kept sweeping.

###

April 1, 2013

A vengeful demon who possessed nothing but two safety pins, a time tape belt, and a purple Pony Heist bedsheet tunic stood in the center of the Mystery Shack gift shop.

Which was weird, because Soos hadn't heard the door and she totally hadn't been there a moment ago.

"Oh hey! Toga Lady!" Soos turned to Wendy, who was picking up a few bucks as a temp worker handing the spring break tourists. "It's Toga Lady. She came in like a month ago. The toga's cool, right? I think it's cool."

Wendy glanced up, choked back a laugh, and scrambled to grab her phone for a picture.

"So, where are the Pines?" Toga Lady asked, with an edge of impatience.

"Oh, dude, did you come all they way back here to meet them? I'm sorry, the Mr. Pineses didn't make it. They couldn't get a flight out of Atlanta." Soos stopped, frowned, and pulled a water-stained letter from his pocket to double check. "Sorry, Atlantis. Something about a siege of sirens?"

"They would pick now to invade," Toga Lady muttered. "I suppose the children aren't here."

How did she know about the children? Maybe she'd visited last summer and remembered them? Like, early summer, before Pony Heist came out. Soos would have remembered the toga. "Naw, heh. They went to Roswell."

"Oh, cool," Wendy said distractedly, busy texting Toga Lady to everyone she knew. "Checking out the competition."

"Yeah, Dipper's sending me like a billion pictures of the alien museum."

"Well," Toga Lady snapped, "when are they showing up?"

Soos was beginning to get the impression that Toga Lady was less an admiring fan, and more one of those customers. All the same, he said, "June first, for sure. That's when the kids get here for summer break so the Mr. Pineses are coming too. Definitely. Promise."

She rolled her eyes—one of them twitched, like she'd gotten something in it and was struggling to keep it open—but said, "All right, fine! June. What's the difference?" She trudged to the door and leaned next to it by the snow globe shelves, fiddling with her belt, as if she was settling in to wait right there for the next two months.

Soos frowned—she might drive off tourists, blocking the door like that—but said, "Oh! While you're here, I thought you might be interested in this belt." He reached past Wendy to grab it from beneath the cash register. "I didn't get a chance to show you last time before—"

He looked toward the door. She was gone. "Huh. Did you see Toga Lady leave?"

Wendy shrugged. "Wasn't looking."

"Huh." Soos replaced the belt. At least he knew when he'd see her next.

###

June 1, 2013

"What's with the belt?" Stan asked.

"Oh! It's for a regular." Soos pointed with both hands down at the fuzzy pink belt peeking beneath his suit jacket. "I think she's comin' today. She wanted to meet the original Mr. Mystery."

"Hey, an admirer!" Stan mysteriously grew two inches as his posture spontaneously improved. "Is she cute?"

"Uh... if you like bedsheet togas?"

"Ooh, a party girl."

Over by the shop's glass display case, Ford said, "These are new," and lifted a jar with an alien fetus suspended in green goo.

"Oh, yeah!" Soos said. "Dipper sent me like, a billion keychains of these little alien guys from Roswell. So I started filling Abuelita's empty spice jars with aliens and lime jello. Cool, huh? It looks like we stole them from a secret government lab or something."

Stan laughed, slinging an arm around Soos. "Listen to this! Brilliant! I knew I put the right guy in charge."

Soos grinned goofily. "Aw, gee, Mr. Pines..." A flash of purple caught the corner of his eye. Toga Lady was leaning next to the door by the snow globe shelves, fiddling with her belt.

Here was a chance to show off his great business instincts with Stan watching. Time to make a sale. "Oh, hey, Toga Lady! I didn't hear you come in! Still rockin' Pony Heist, huh? Hey, I've been trying to show you this belt I think you'll like..."

But she wasn't listening to him. Her gaze was fixed on the Pines twins' backs. As Soos watched, her expression darkened, and her grin widened.

The vengeful demon reached past the snow globes, snatched up a heavy "mysterious green crystal cluster ($250)" made of glued-together broken glass, and heaved it up over his head. "Hey, Sixer!" Face contorted in a snarl of a smile, he turned the cluster over, sharp broken shards pointing downward. "Welcome home!"

Bill Cipher swung the glass weight down toward Ford's head.

(If you wanna keep reading, all chapters are right here!)

#bill cipher #human bill cipher #soos ramirez #(I'm not gonna tag every character that shows up but Soos gets the honor of being the viewpoint character here. please enjoy him.)#gravity falls #gravity falls fanart #gravity falls fic #fanfic #fanart #my art #my writing #bill goldilocks cipher #opatoes #ask

258 notes · View notes

the-gateway-to-madness · 7 months

Text

Jack Frost Headcanons

Jack likes strong flavors, be they spicy, sweet, or savory. He likes mild stuff too- point is he'll try any food, pretty much.

Jack has good coordination and steady hands, and as such is very gentle when he handles most objects (and animals, and people).

Jack is a Ravenclaw with ADHD: he's not ambitious or trying to join the Guardians, who are powerful and well-known. His fighting style is more about maneuvering and strategizing than guts or power (unless you really upset him like when Sandy died). The being-easily-bored and good sense of humor would indicate intelligence as well.

Jack has a great sense of rhythm but dances like a dork on purpose.

Jack is a night owl.

Jack creates a proper hideaway for himself in Burgess after the movie. Something about the forming and confirmation of his identity in the movie makes me think he'd be ready to make a nice little home or even just a safe spot afterwards.

Jack's main love language is quality time, North's is words of affirmation, Bunny's is acts of service, Tooth's is gifts, and Sandy's is physical touch. Yes, I know North seems like he should be the gifts type, and he definitely does gifts like no one else- but he comforts Jack by talking with him, and Tooth tries to comfort Sophie with a (horrendous) gift.

Jack never yells during arguments. He's seen what it does to people who've been abused, watched kids and lovers be hurt and tried to stop it- so he refuses to even risk scaring anyone that way. Even before becoming a Guardian, Jack would never raise his voice in a fight- at the very least, never face-to-face.

Jack has a handful of scars, mostly from dumb accidents or crash-landings. He refuses to tell the stories. Everyone assumes they're horrible and traumatic, but in reality, Jack was just terrible at paying attention to stuff when he first started out as a spirit.

Emotions like anger, embarrassment, or attraction raise Jack's body temperature just enough for his blood to thaw and his heartbeat to get going. It startles him every single time.

Jack is fascinated by folklore and mythology and studied them extensively to try to track down other spirits to befriend, with little success.

Jack played at least one instrument in his past life (his hands would be suited to violin or piano, especially) and instrumental music still calms and focuses him.

Jack was a farmer in his past life and still has lean, strong muscle hidden under his hoodie. He could absolutely win an arm wrestle with Bunny.

Jack is a little insecure about his Adam's apple.

Jack's powers are stronger at night due to the lack of apricity.

Unlike the animosity that a lot of the fandom portrays Jack having with other potential seasonal spirits, I think he's buddies with the other seasons, they just don't see each other much due to minimal domain overlap. The spirit of autumn is his favorite, but he's very protective of spring (mirroring the fact spring relies on winter to nourish the earth). The other seasons all treat him like their baby brother.

Jack dips french fries in Wendy's frosties unironically. He probably dips their chicken nuggets in the frosties too.

Sophie made Jack watch gen 4 My Little Pony with her and he didn't think the songs were half bad. He would never admit this to Jamie or anybody else in a thousand years.

Jack thinks birds are cool.

Cats see Jack more often than dogs. He doesn't know why, but he's willing to pet most things that move.

Stay tuned for what will probably be a lot more of these-

#rise of the guardians #rotg jack frost #jack frost #rotg #rotg sandy #rotg north #rotg tooth #rotg bunnymund

62 notes · View notes

cl0wncandies · 9 months

Text

breast cancer show ever is my favorite south park episode. i think that the whole plot line that sets up the fight scene in last few minutes of the episode makes it even more satisfying to watch cartman get the snot beaten out of him in the end.

cause first off, before this episode aired, there wasn’t really any point in the show where cartman truly got what he deserved. yeah some bad things had happened to him before, but he’s never truly gotten any form of karma for his actions.

so when wendy says that she’s gonna fight him. he doesn’t take it all that seriously, just he expects to either easily win the fight or for wendy to back out before the end of the school day.

and then at lunch he realizes that if he loses the fight, everyone will think he’s a massive loser. what makes this even funnier is that cartman genuinely believes that he’s “the cool kid” and that everyone likes him. so his fear of losing a fight to a girl (which is a big deal for fourth graders) makes him desperate to prevent it from happening, without apologizing in front of everyone of course.

so now cartman does literally everything in his power to stop the fight before the school day ends.

he tries to apologize to wendy in private, without confessing that he was wrong in front of everyone.

he tries bribing her with money, and even goes as far as to eat his own underwear.

and near the end of the school day, he’s so desperate to get out of the fight that he goes up to his teachers desk and takes a dump on it in front of the whole class so he would get a detention. and then the fight was moved to the next morning. he wasn’t out of the fight yet he had time to find another strategy to stop wendy from beating the shit out of him.

cartman then goes full tattletale mode and tells his mom a sob story of how wendy is bullying him at school, and how we just wants to be her friend. he even takes the extra mile to put a fancy cardigan on and comb his hair over to make himself look even more sad and pathetic.

so obviously wendys parents are like “hey don’t fight this kid” and she finally gives up.

now, if cartman had just stopped there, he probably would’ve gotten away with his actions like he normally has up to this point in the show. but this is eric cartman, so he obviously has to take the extra mile in terrorizing her at school. he makes his school research paper about making fun of breast cancer, just to further show to wendy that there’s nothing she can do anymore since her parents have prevented her from fighting.

then wendy gets called down to the principals office, and principal victoria is like “hey are you gonna beat up cartman” and wendy says no. then victoria is like “mmmm, are you sure about that?”

AND THEN SHE BASICALLY GIVES WENDY PERMISSION TO FUCKING DESTROY CARTMAN IN THE SCHOOL PLAYGROUND. she calls him a “fat little lump of cancer” that needs to be “fought.” i find this scene so funny cause it just shows that literally everyone, including the adults and school faculty wants to see cartman get some form of karma.

and then the actual fight scene itself is one of the best moments in the entire show. here’s a list of things that i love about it.

wendy pulls up to the playground with a bunch of students following her. some of the kids are from different grade levels, which shows that literally everyone wants to see cartman get beaten up.

and wendy also puts her hair up in a bun and takes off her coat so we can see her my little pony tank top, so you know that she means BUSINESS.

the face that cartman makes when he realizes that he can no longer manipulate or gaslight his way out of the fight without backing out in front of the entire school, which he can’t do since he believes that he’s the “cool kid.”

cartman having to pull up his pants after the first punch that wendy threw made him fall over.

and lastly, how butters gets so excited to see them fight. he’s been egging them both on throughout the entire episode, and he gets so happy when wendy finally shows up at the playground.

also, when he yells “FUCK HIM UP WENDY!” was so funny

anyways 10/10 episode it’s so funny

#south park #south park fandom #eric cartman #sp cartman #wendy testaburger #sp wendy #butters stotch #sp butters #principal victoria #stan marsh #kyle brovlofski #kenny mccormick

102 notes · View notes

pinkrifle · 1 year

Note

Hello!! It's me again, I love thinking about what it's like to be a big sibling to the boys, so.. What do you think it would be like to be Stan and Shelly's big sibling? Like being a comfort person to both of them, being able to calm Shelly down when she needs it.. I love thinking about that...🫠

- 🩷🩷

— being stan/shelly’s big sibling!!

cws/tw’s: none?

a/n: I LOVE STAN AND SHELLY THIS ASK IS SO REAL THANK UU !! i feel like i’m the ceo of big sibling hc’s for south park 😙🔥.. (which i have no problem being 🤞) and i do have a little bit of writers block so excuse the duration of time i’m posting these at :( thanks for your patience!

misc. notes: reader is g/n, writing is in hc’s since non specified,,, kevlly will be in purple text, and uhh thassit:3

your probably randy and sharon’s last fave, hence being the oldest. which kinda drives you crazy but it makes shelly feel a little bit better about herself!!

if wendy ever breaks up with stan (for the 500th time) you always welcome him into ur room to sob and have multiple amounts of ice cream 🤭 if shelly makes fun of him for crying you give her that 😐 look and she backs off.

when stan get’s the spooky fish and dead ppl start appearing in his room you are the first to help him and hug/cuddle him when needed 💔 your also the first to dig into aunt flo’s purse and find the adress of the pet store.

you love when kyle and kenny come over!!! not much cartman,,, you make all sorts of activities to do when kyle and kenny come over and you make it a little less fun when eric comes 😙… stan does get embarrassed your hanging out with his friends and he tells you to shoo

you do worry for stan when he hangs out with cartman incase cartman gets him or manipulates him into something terrible.

during shelly’s outbursts you always take her in maybe like the bathroom or her room just to calm her down and let her cry on your shoulder or yell at you, just wanting the best for your little sister <3

you do also treat her to ice cream since her braces do tend to hurt when she yells alot and you clean the spit off of her chest/shirt

when u and shelly were kids you wanted a pet pony so bad….. and when stan was born you guys tricked him into begging randy and sharon for a pony, your parents didn’t think it was that funny as you guys did 🤭

definitely give stan a bunch of advice on girls, boys, etc, if randy ever starts genuinely being a bad parent to you guys you’ll always spend as much time as you can with your little siblings.

if you guys ever were to get allowance you would divide yours amongst all 3 of you just to give them some extra, they are forever grateful (stan is jumping all over the place)

whenever shelly or stan get in trouble you always sneak up to them and try to talk to them if their upset, and you try to distract sharon/trick her into getting them out of trouble. you always keep them out of trouble anyways

when you babysit them it’s A RIOT, shelly screaming at stan, stan screaming at shelly, you end up just yelling at the both of them to stfu and sit down 😕 and that one time where shelly throws cartman against the wall while she’s babysitting him, you help him up (and slightly giggle,,,)

helping at tegridy farms when your siblings don’t wanna/can’t do it anymore, your still the least favorite child but with some dignity lol. (u definitely have tried some weed before and shelly n stan have smelled it on u, giving you a wtf look 😭)

always teasing them because your in higher grades than them, but u always help with their homework since you should already know it !!

if you and stan get into a fight he’s always the one apologizing (still upset but like, how upset could this guy be if u bring him dr pepper) and embarrassed the next morning. you forget about the fight and he takes a sigh of relief.

if you and shelly get into a fight, your always the first apologizing because she’s so damn stubborn. she tells you “whatever, it’s fine” and sends you out of her room, definitely acts like you didn’t even talk the next morning and gets all buddy buddy with you

whenever they wanna hang out with their friends, sharon tells you to walk/drive/watch them, it irritates all 3 of you because you just wanna relax, stan wants some alone time with his buddies (and not to get ripped on) and shelly thinks that she’s 13 so she’s old enough to be out by herself >:(

for my kevlly ppl (cuz i know i am <3) , when shelly brings kevin over your on cloud 9!! how could your sister, a meanie poo bag such an amazing guy? regardless, your happy for her and always bug the two of them, much to their dismay.

always “accidentally” walking into their room before a private moment and getting so happy when shelly tells everyone she and kevin had their first kiss 😙

you make them matching bracelets and they “hate it” (THEY DONT. ABSOLUTELY KEEP MAKING MATCHING STUFF FOR THEM 🤭🤭🤭)

a/n: I HAD SM FUN WRITING THIS WOOHOO!!! i thought i would be slacking off but no i think this is a pretty decent length!! :) i hope you enjoyed this and if you want something more complex then don’t be afraid to ask! keep requesting yo i love it

#（✿ ◞◟）🫧 marj writes! ﹒#stan marsh #shelly marsh #stan marsh x reader #shelly marsh x reader #south park #south park x reader #south park x reader platonic

101 notes · View notes

lemonjestercoffee · 6 months

Text

the other book horse named Twilight

i actually decided his horse name is Violet Shade cause using Twilight in his name was too fucking obvious. same goes for the names i though up for Desuhiko and Kurumi- both thunderbolt and Wendy are too fucking obvious for pony names so i decided to do something else.

i should draw the rest but i also just- am too lazy to

#raincode #master detective archives: rain code #vivia twilight #kai doodles #my little pony #mlp

52 notes · View notes

wannaseewhatshangin · 1 year

Note

Hello could I please request a Dallas imagine where they play 7 minutes in heaven with the reader? 💕

I love this 🤭😭 also here. 🧸 have a teddy bear

To say you were nervous was an understatement.

You have liked Dallas for a while but of course you would never tell him that because the reaction you would most likely get from him would be him laughing in your face.

You were at the Curtis house and Darry was at work and soda and Steve took the day off and pony boy and Johnny didn’t wanna play because apparently “ewwwww gross! We know what happens during 7 minutes in heaven! Let’s go read, Johnny” Two-bit suggested that you play 7 minutes in heaven.

You called one of your friends from school over to make it less awkward.

She was really pretty. Like..REALLY pretty.

You were honestly certain that Dallas would try to get at her.

He took one look at her and looked the other way. You were kinda shocked.

You guys put a few knickknacks (each one representing yourselves) in a hat that you guys stole from Darry’s room.

Your friend (we’ll call her Wendy) put in her earring

Two-bit put in his Mickey Mouse charm bracelet (something to do w Mickey Mouse idfk)

Steve put a gummy bear that he found outside 😭

Soda put a sock 😭

Dallas put in his St. Christopher

You put in one of your rings

Two-bit shook the hat and decided who was gonna go first.

“Soda, why don’t you go first”

He put his hand inside the hat and pulled out an earring.

“Whose is this?” He said, holding it up.

“That’s mine”, Wendy replied, getting up

Her and soda walked to the closet, setting the timer for 7 minutes.

After their time was up, they walked out of the closet, the boys high-fiving soda as he goes back to his spot.

“Y/n, you go next”

You reluctantly agreed, putting your hand inside the hat.

You were expecting to get someone like two-bit or Steve but you pulled out Dally’s St. Christopher.

You turned all kinds of different shades of red.

You fiddled with the necklace on the way to the closet.

Dallas opened the door for you, shushing the boys as they were hollered.

He shut the door behind him, turning the light on.

“Your 7 minutes start now!” Two yelled through the door.

You stood in your spot, fiddling with his chain.

“So.. uhm..” you said, trying to make this less awkward.

He looked at you, getting closer.

“Mhm” he said in response, grabbing your waist.

Your eyes widened as you felt his hands make contact with your waist.

“Uhh..” you said, looking down.

“So are you gonna kiss me or what?” He said, looking at you with adoration, putting a strand of your hair behind your ear.

You looked up at him with red cheeks.

He leaned in and so did you until your lips met. You kissed back. Why wouldn’t you.

The kiss went on for a while, getting into the moment. But your mind could only come up with one thing.

It’s just a game.

Your thoughts were cut off by the door swinging open, Dallas in the middle of holding your hips as you were pressed against the wall, kissing you.

“Woah. Didn’t know you had the hots for y/n, Dally” Steve said

You were blushing furiously, Dallas almost turned red.

“I knew.” Two said, smirking

You walked out the closet and Dallas sat next to you as the game went on.

By the end of the game Wendy and Steve went home.

We picked up all the items in the hat and returned them to their owners.

Dallas decided to head home, opened the front door and waved bye to everyone.

You saw his necklace sitting next to you, hopping up and running after him with the necklace.

“Hey! Dally! You forgot your chain!” You said, running up to him.

“I know, I did it on purpose.” He said, looking you in your eyes.

But you couldn’t help but notice a spark in his eyes.

“Why?”

“So you would come out here with me. “ he said, getting closer for the second time tonight.

“Is there a reason?”

“..yeah.” He said, kissing you again.

You both pulled away, both of your cheeks flushed a gentle red.

You pulled yourself out of your trance and held up his chain.

“Well.. here’s your chain”

He looked at you and smiled

“You can keep it, doll”

You smiled before, heading back into the house.

He stopped you

You turned around and looked at him

“Yes?”

He hesitated, but soon asked a question you never thought he would ask.

“Will you be my girlfriend?”

You laughed and kissed him on the cheek

“Of course”

#dallas winston headcanons #dallas winston x reader #sodapop headcanons #johnny cade #johnny cade headcanons #johnny cade x reader #sodapop x reader #ponyboy curtis #ponyboy headcanons #ponyboy x reader

107 notes · View notes

punkitt-is-here · 1 year

Note

Okay, look.

Not to evoke a "Sir, this is a Wendy's"-moment, but, i HAVE to tell you this.

Your art and Vylet Pony's music made me love the fandom again. I met my wife in 2013 over the ponies, so this means a lot. Unfortunately, cyberbullying made life hard and I've been trying to heal from it ever since. Your art helps me so much. Genuinely thank you, thank you, thank you. <3

Oh, and I made some fem!Mac fanart (femme art, if you will), and put it on our walls. ^-^ You've made at least 2 lives so much happier. Sorry for being all sappy, but I try telling people how great they're doing whenever i get the chance so: Yeah. You're a good person.

WAGHHRHTHFNSMF THIS IS SO SWEET THABK YOU FOR SENDING ME THIS...WISHING YOU THE MOST DELIGHTFUL OF EVENINGS ALWAYS

#my posts #asks #luciferian herbivore #:)

95 notes · View notes

theflatpancakes · 10 months

Text

THE OUTSIDERS HEADCANONS CAUSE WHY NOT! 😀

(Includes sexualities and pronouns because why not)

Ponyboy:

Reads fanfic, like a concerning amount.

Gets really into a book or movie and goes to read the second one (if there is one) then loses all his interest in it half way through

Is surprisingly good at driving, but nobody trusts him to do so (even when they get older and he HAS a driver's license)

Can't cook for the life of him. Like He once tried to make instant noodles on the stove and they caught fire... 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳...

The only thing he 𝘤𝘢𝘯 make successfully is eggs. And he can only make those because Soda taught him when they were younger

Bisexual but doesn't know that it's a thing (Johnny was his bi awakening, lmao)

He/they

Sodapop:

The best at cooking out of the whole gang

Only knows stuff about cars due to Steve going on rants about them sometimes

He enjoys cooking for everyone, but Darry usually takes over for dinner due to Soda preferring to make sweet stuff and it can just get to be too much for everyone

^ As you can assume due to the last one, he's a sweets person. He LOVES sugar. His favorite combo is sweet and salty (based af)

The kind of person to dip his fries in his frosty at Wendy's (also based af)

Also Bi (Steve was 𝘩𝘪𝘴 bi awakening, lol)

He/him

Darry:

The second best at cooking.

^Taught soda when they were little and soon got surpassed in his cooking skills

Prefers savory, but sweet can be good every once in a while (By that I mean every morning with the chocolate cake)

Not a movie or book person, but if he had to choose one, it'd be books

Secretly, really close with Dally, they don't interact much compared to the rest of the gang, but when they do, they're basically inseparable.

Gets flustered/embarrassed surprisingly easily

Token cishet of the group (Heteroflexible, the only reason is he thinks that he may have had some slight feelings for Paul when they used to play football together. He/him)

Steve:

Even though he doesn't seem to care about Pony, he actually does.

Despite Soda being his best friend, Two-Bit is a close second

Him, Soda, and Two-Bit often go out together, and they both need Soda to be the mom friend if Darry isn't there

Gayass (homosexual af, mostly because of Soda)

He/him

Two-Bit:

Despite being one of the oldest of the gang, he's one of if not the most immature

He loves cooking but absolutely sucks at it

Perfectionist but is too lazy to clean and 𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘧𝘪𝘭𝘭 that perfectionism

Played with dolls when he was younger but always hid it from people.

^ The only person who knows is Dally, and he completely uses that as blackmail against Two

Cares way too much about everyone (especially Pony)

Had feelings for Dally when he [Dal] first came to Tulsa, but they slowly faded away over a few years

He says his sexuality is, "If there's a hole, there's a goal." (Exact words)

He/him

Dally:

Somehow becomes a successful author when he gets older??

Secretly enjoys books, reading, and writing, but nobody but him knows

^ Pony made a joke that was a reference to a book at one point, and Dally was the only one that got it. He cracked up a little at it, but nobody understood why (Pony kind of figured it out at some point lol)

Most mature aside from Darry

Admires Darry and wants to be like him. He beats himself up if he messes up in a way that Darry never would

He is Johnny and Pony's father figure, Pony doesn't realize it as he seems Darry as more of his father figure

^ By that, I mean he takes care of them like a father, mostly Johnny but often Pony as well

Can just sit down and eat a whole tub of raw cookie dough by himself with no problem, but regrets it an hour later when his stomach hurts. He still does it, though, every single time

Aggressively bisexual but would fuck anyone

He/him

Johnny:

Stays introverted and close to Dally his whole life

Has no self-control when it comes to sugary things/junk food

Never really hungry, but when he 𝘪𝘴 hungry he either eats everything in sight or a single cracker

Likes reading with Pony

Darry takes him in at some point when his parents became too much

Wears his jean jacket all the time, only takes it off to shower, change, or sleep

^ Barely ever washes that thing, somehow never gets it too dirty, though?? Like only dirt/grass stains

Likes planes, a lot

Often joins Dally in eating raw cookie dough

^ Once invited Pony to a cookie dough eating session, but he declined, as he didn't want to get sick

𝓜𝓮𝓷.

^ Enjoys being with Pony... if ya catch my drift 😏 (ITS A CRUSH NOT WHAT THE EMOJI IMLPYS AHAHGDJWJSJ)

He/him (but sometimes enjoys dressing/looking fem in private)

#the outsiders #ponyboy #johnny cade #dallas winston #pony #ponyboy curtis #headcanons #headcanon #steve randle #sodapop curtis #darry curtis #two-bit matthews

28 notes · View notes

rannadylin · 2 months

Text

Welcome to Wendelind's!

So I splurged and bought a Lyndelby house on LOTRO...and I ended up getting the Stately Deluxe because I was just kind of non-committally visiting the neighborhood and thinking about eventually getting one for Wendelind, my River Hobbit, until I saw the secret underground waterfalls in the basement of that one and then it was a NOW! BUY NOW! MUST HAVE INDOOR FISHING! situation... :-D

I've been decorating it for the past week (goodness that takes a while, even with all the housing decorations saved up in my storage it took a concerted effort of parking alts at the housing furnishers in the various regions to ship Wendy the floor tiles and wall paints and things that she needed...) and it's about ready for visitors! So...Welcome to Wendy's! (I feel like I need to insert a 🍔 here for...some reason... XD)

Lots of (lovely!) pics are going behind the cut, click to take the full tour of 2 Glenmouth Path, Lywel, Lyndelby Homesteads on Evernight. :-D

A convenient place for visitors to hitch their steeds, featuring Lennidhren's Rivendell horse on the left, Cerphedis' Sporting Steed on the right, a couple others that just looked cool in between, and Corbous' Mathom pony snacking on the hay.

Statues lining the path to the house. Not sure if I'll keep them there; the elf statues seem a little out of place in Lyndelby, but I had them from an expansion pack and hadn't found anywhere else to put them yet so we're trying them at Wendy's.

In the decorating process I found out that you can take pet skills! And make them into housing decorations! Either with mithril coins or with a pet harness from the Curator, and WHAT LUCK! The Curator was in town. So Willem Whiskers and his cub are visiting, and frolicking near Wendy's grape vines. Wendelind, who, as a River Hobbit, is currently questing in Cardolan, doesn't even know who Bingo Boffin is; so I suppose the lynx friends came to visit with Lennidhren!

She may be tall for a Hobbit, but it's still hard for this wee lady to see over the grapevines, so she has a very out-of-place Arnorian dais and bench to give her a slightly better view of the gorgeous landscape beyond her yard.

Just inside the house, she has a cozy reading room with a window seat, stack of well-loved books, and raspberries! The window seats were the second selling-point of this house, other than the waterfalls. Window seats, Waterfalls, and Wendelind. It must be the alliteration.

Candaith is another NPC that Wendy hasn't even met yet; nevertheless her house features a small Grey Company shrine. Gotta plan ahead for when she gets to those levels, after all!

The dining room is almost ready for visitors! Lunch is currently roasting on the fire pit. Tallfolk visiting will fit better at this table than Wendy does, though...

A couple of bedrooms! I think the first is the master bedroom and the second is the guest bedroom...

This little closet...might be haunted?

Some mementos of...places Wendy hasn't even been to yet. XD I suppose Lennidhren may have set up this room!

And last but very far from least is the underground waterfall swimming/fishing room!

Thank you for joining us on this tour of Wendelind's Wee Warren. Dinner is at 1, but if you are early enough for second breakfast...wait, this isn't the Shire. Do they have second breakfast in Lyndelby? Well, if they don't, Corbous probably (enthusiastically) introduced her to the tradition anyway!

#lotro #lord of the rings online #lyndelby #lotro housing #wendelind the river hobbit

13 notes · View notes

w98pops · 8 months

Note

Still cant believe a fucking terf is in fallout fandom intecacting with trans creators and drawing her ugly stereotypical twink transmasc character. You should be ashamed

What is even happening to my inbox anymore. Idk if it's the same person that asked about Sharky or not, but it really makes me uncomfortable.

I don't know where the TERF stuff even come from, but I'm very open with my political views and yeah, I was a radfem in 2019 or something. I also was a very vulnerable sad russian teenager. I know not a lot of people on tumblr aware of all the intricacies of russian internet scene, but I assume you, anon, have some knowledge, because you called me a TERF in the first place.

There's an internet phenomenon called "alt-right pipeline" and I fell in the simular thing called "TERF pipeline". This shit is inevitable for every single afab person that speaks russian. It's a really big thing. I don't say it's an excuse to be a bigot, but I was 12 when i first touched the internet. I was insecure, very fucking poor and spiteful. Also I had and (still have) some hormone problems and was generally a pretty ugly girl so coped with it by drawing ponies and hating on elusive and mysterious "men in skirts" these smart twitter girlies always talked about.

To be perfectly honest, I genuinely don't understand what russian TERFs are fighting for or against, I was in this shit for solid few years and still have no idea. I mean, now it's illegal to be transgender in Russia (a real law), but it wasn't a win for these angry teenage girls, it was a win for genocidal bigoted russian government, the same one that legalized domestic violence (also a law. its officially not a real crime in this country). I went off the topic and started ranting about my frustrations with the government again FUCK 😭

I tried to say that russian internet is genuinely a fucked up place, but I lived in the middle of Siberia in a village, ideologically only had my orthodox grandma, racist older brother and TERFs on the internet. I only started to learn english a few years ago, so i didn't have enough options before that. Or, to better words, didn't have enough knowledge to be a better person.

I'm really really and sincerely fucking sorry for that. Like, truly. It was really fucked up and I'm ashamed of stuff I said and supported blindly. I now have resources and have some media literacy in my disposal and basic understanding of english to educate myself about the topics I'm talking about. I'm trying my hardest to show support and love to all my queer friends and mutuals, and as an artist I do all I can to be inclusive, not because I feel the need to, but because I want to.

I have no right to speak about trans people and their issues and I won't. I don't know if Sharky is as bad as anon described, because I'm biased (this is my character after all) and not educated enough to acknowledge all the stereotypes associated with transmasculinity. I would really enjoy to hear opinions of my fellow transmen. To address some of my choices regarding his design and writing:

- He wears pink, because it's a quirky color that doesn't show up much in Fallout. Never meant to de-masculate him or to ridicule him. It's my favorite color, after red and brown, which are the primary colors of Wendy.

- He has a silly personality and a carefree attitude because 1) I'm projecting and 2) Wendy needed a character to balance out her awkward and moody autism

- He's a girl's boy and has wives. I didn't have the reason to make him not like girls. I wanted him to be an example of positive masculinity and solidarity. He is a straight dude who loves women. Not just sexually attracted to them or sees them as pets. They are his partners. With their own personalities and lives. Also I wanted to make a full circle 😭😭😭 I'm asexual and bi-romantic. I like boys, girls, all between and beyond boys and girls and don't really think sex is a big thing for me. Aletus likes boys, Sharky likes girls and Wendy likes when there's no sex. Pretty simple, I think.

Hope this explains why Sharky is the way he is. Would still really appreciate an opinion from a trans person. Or any kind of feedback really, because I've been feeling really fucking bad lately and can't objectively reflect on my choices. Also more questions about my OCs are very much welcome. There's a lot of stuff that made me feel like I've been misiforming people, including this anonymous message, and I will specify anything you want to know. Thank you all a lot.

#at least i got this little rant of my chest #but i dont know anymore #ive been feeling shameful for a lot of my posts here lately #i feel like no one really wants to see me post stupid ass oc sketches for another gajilliomillionth time this week #i know its not true but im angry at myself that i just cant draw shit anymore #considered taking a break but what will i do bruh #in moments like these i truly fucking wish i had friends #<- cringe emo shit I prohibited myself from saying

28 notes · View notes

ckret2 · 11 months

Text

The most unpleasant breakfast.

I feel like this picture is a perfect summary of the fic so far.

Chapter 6 of The Pines Capture Human Bill Cipher But Can't Tell Anybody Because They Don't Know Whether Killing Him Will Restart Weirdmageddon (title TBD). Chapters one, two, three, four, and five, and I've gotta get a masterpost or something.

####

The group asking for a seat at the truck stop diner was an odd sight: three adult men; two children; and one disheveled barefoot lunatic in a cartoon pony toga, handcuffs, a chain restricting one arm, and the dirt-smeared remains of a butterfly marker mask. But truckers and odd sights were the only things you saw at a truck stop on the outskirts of Gravity Falls at three a.m., and the handcuffed guest wasn't blinking SOS in Morse code, so the weary party was escorted to the round corner booth without question. They sandwiched Bill between Soos and Stan and silently awaited their menus.

"Hey, I'm Dani, I'll be taking care of you tonight." A waitress passed out menus to the group, hesitated uncertainly with a couple of paper kids' menus in front of Dipper and Mabel, and handed them over when Mabel made grabby hands for the accompanying four-pack of crayons. "Can I start you off with some coffee, or...?" Dani's gaze fell on Bill, and she beamed. "Oh, hey! Toga Lady! Hi!"

Bill gave her a puzzled smile and raised brows. "Hello?"

"Oh, yeah dude!" Soos laughed. "Wendy got a picture of you the last time you came by. You're totally a local meme now."

"Okay, I've gotta know." The waitress gestured at Bill's ensemble with her pen. "What's your story?"

"Well—" Bill opened his mouth, and froze; and the whole table went still as they simultaneously had the same realization.

If anybody revealed Bill's identity, in Gravity Falls, the epicenter of Weirdmageddon, they'd have a mob on their hands. At worst the town would rip Bill to shreds, and at best they'd throw him in a cell so they could schedule his shredding for a pleasant Saturday afternoon when more people could watch. Bill couldn't risk the possibility that he'd die for good, and the humans couldn't risk the possibility that he'd be re-released as a triangle.

None of them could reveal anything.

And all of them knew it.

"Party," Bill said. And then, warming to the cover story, he went on: "This is my party uniform. A little anachronistic, but what can I say? There's nothing I like better than being the center of attention at a wild party!" He cast a sideways glance toward the Stan twins. "Until the fun police break it up."

Ford grumbled, "Partying wasn't the problem. You were going to burn down the town."

"You get so worked up over a little bonfire, sheesh." Bill rolled his eyes, leaned toward the waitress, and said, "These geek types, I tell you. Some people wouldn't recognize a good time if it appeared to them in a divine vision."

"Maybe if I ever had a divine vision..."

Bill shot Ford a dirty look. They quickly broke off their mutual glare, conscious of Dani curiously watching, and Bill breezily explained, "He had a bad trip and still blames me for it."

Dani laughed. "You're crazy! What's your real name, Toga Lady?"

Bill hesitated. "Guess!"

"What?"

"Guess! It's a game. You guess mine, I'll guess yours."

She looked down at her name tag. "I already told you my name's Dani."

"But did you tell me it's Danielle Miranda?"

Her eyebrows shot up.

Bill beamed. "I'll give you three guesses! While you're thinking about that, could we get a round of coffee, and... do you serve anything more toxic than mildly spoiled apple juice? No? Just coffee."

"And a chocolate shake," Mabel threw in.

Bill's eyes lit up. "Make that two."

Stan snapped, "I am not paying for you to get a chocolate shake." Bill sighed.

Once the waitress was gone, Bill said, "Trauma still disrupts humans' long-term memories, right? Have the locals forgotten my name yet?"

"Yeah, no, everyone remembers," Soos said. "I know two different Williams that got their names legally changed."

Bill groaned. "Great. Terrific! Fine. My last pseudonym was getting stale anyway, it's about time I find a new one. All right, what have we got, toss out some ideas." At the others' blank looks, he said, "I've spent the last couple of days getting starved, beaten, and literally killed. All I'm coming up with is 'Not-Bill' and 'the letter A.' Somebody else think of something."

Stan let out a loud sigh. "Who cares? Bob."

"No."

"Will."

"No, and you're stupid."

"Hey—!"

Ignoring Stan's irritation, Bill looked around the table. "Anyone else?"

The others at the table considered the question. Soos said, "Ferdinand. I think Ferdinand is way cool."

"Coming out of you, that's not the high recommendation you think it is, Questiony."

Soos winced. "Ouch."

"C'mon, give me something that sounds a little bit like me."

Dipper said, "Troy Angle?" Mabel laughed.

Bill didn't. "Troy again."

Ford ventured, "Xanthe?"

"Ha. Sure, just call me 'yellow hair,' why not. I like the direction you're thinking—"

Stan—whose barely-suppressed rage at this whole situation had been steadily building back up since Bill called him stupid—snapped, "Why are we looking for a name he'll like? Why does he get any say in this! I say we call him whatever he can pronounce through a mouthful of broken teeth! Because when I'm through with this sonovab—"

Bill blocked his view of Stan's threatening fist by holding up his menu. "But Stanley's got a point, I need a simple name. How many Americans know how to spell Ξανθή?"

"Get this stupid thing out of my—"

Mabel stood and slammed her hands on the table, interrupting the brewing argument. "GOLDILOCKS!"

Bill erupted into a peal of laughter that made the rest of the table flinch. His handcuffs clattered as he smacked his hands on the table and he leaned toward Mabel. "Yes yes yes YES! You've got it! That's perfect!" It was like a light switch had flipped on in Bill, suddenly re-energizing him. Eyes crinkling in genuine amusement, Bill said, "You know, I like you, kid. You're the one with the fun ideas!"

Mabel blinked in surprise, any pleasure at the unexpected compliment dampened by the knowledge that being liked by Bill was never a good thing. Miffed, Dipper said, "Hey, I made a pun."

"I don't like puns."

Ford said, "If you'd please stop trying to win over my grand-niece with flattery..." but fell silent as Dani came back with drinks.

She passed coffee around, set a chocolate shake down for Mabel, set a second one down for Bill—"On the house"—and winked. "Is it Rumpelstiltskin?"

Bill cracked up again. "No, but give me three hours and a particle accelerator and I could teach you to spin straw into gold!"

"Worth a shot." Dani laughed. "Okay, is everyone ready to order?"

There was an awkward pause. Soos finally said, "Oh man, we all got to talking and completely forgot to look at the menu. Can you give us like five minutes?"

"Sure. Just wave when you're ready."

The group steeled themselves to the task of picking a meal, which felt far too mundane for such a bizarre night. Dipper frowned at the paper kids' menu he'd been handed. "Hey, Soos. Can I look at your menu when you're done...?"

Wordlessly, Bill stole Dipper's menu and crayon box and slid over his adult menu.

"... Thanks."

Bill had already dumped out the crayons and started drawing triangles on the menu. "Don't mention it!"

By the time Dani returned, Bill had covered a quarter of the menu in tiny doodles of his own triangular face, reluctantly scratched them out after Soos pointed out he could get arrested for those, and covered half the rest in countless eyes. Soos ordered a burger, Stan ordered bacon and eggs, Ford ordered an omelet, Dipper ordered an omelet too not because Ford did but because it sounded good and maybe he wanted to try one okay that's all, Mabel ordered rainbow sprinkle chocolate pancakes, and Bill ordered a banana octopus pancake and a side of bacon "as floppy as you can make it" over Stan's objections to letting Bill get a side item.

"And raw bacon. Got it." Dani closed her notebook, gave Bill a considering look, and said, "Is it Blondie?"

"Ha! No! But you've been a good sport so I'll give you a hint! It's something in between your first two guesses."

"Huh..." Dani considered that a moment; then noticed Bill trying to pick up his shake with handcuffs on. "Do you... need help with those? I think our gas station next door's got bolt cutters."

Firmly, Ford said, "We've got bolt cutters at home." Bill gave Dani an apologetic shrug.

As soon as Dani was gone again, Ford leaned forward. "All right, Bill. If you're going to be in our house for who-knows-how-long, we need to establish some ground rules."

"Boy, do we ever," Bill said, with the confidence of somebody who assumed he'd have an equal say in deciding what the rules were.

Ford went on without acknowledging Bill. "For now, we can lock you back in the cellar—"

"Cellar's right under the gift shop," Stan pointed out. "I was thinking a storage closet. Just stuff him in there and pile a bunch of furniture in front of the door."

"You know, Stanley, I think that would be safer," Ford said, like he was trying to pretend he liked the idea based on safety rather than based on how satisfying it would be to make Bill as uncomfortable as possible. "Although I'm sure Bill knows he'll just be putting himself in danger if he makes enough noise to catch anyone's attention—so there's rule number one, no sounds. And once I've done some repairs, we can move him to the bunker..."

"No, I don't think so," Bill said. "I don't like that at all."

Coolly, Ford said, "Well, Bill, you're our prisoner, so we can do what we want, you don't get a say in it, and you don't have to like it. In fact, the more you dislike it, the more I think I do like it."

Stan laughed, elbowing Ford. "Took the words right out of my mouth."

"But that's just the thing—I do get a say in it," Bill said. "I'm as worried as anyone else about what might happen if this body is killed—but there are fates worse than death, aren't there? Like boredom, for instance. You know what I'm talking about, right?" He gave Mabel an appealing look.

She doggedly avoided making eye contact, slurping her shake.

Bill shrugged and returned his attention to Ford. "You know and I know that you're only keeping me alive until you can think of a better way to kill me—and that gives me an advantage. It means I've got nothing to lose. If I'm not living a life that's at least barely tolerable, then your only way to stop me from choosing death on my terms instead of your terms is by sticking me in an artificial coma." His smile stretched wider. "And are you really, really sure I don't know a way to kill myself in my sleep?"

Ford and Stan's scowls deepened the longer Bill spoke. Stan muttered, "If he's gonna be like that, it's not too late to just kill him and get it over with."

Ford shook his head. "What do you consider intolerable conditions."

"Being locked in one little room with nowhere to stretch my legs, no entertainment, and no company. Abandon me in your bunker? Once I get tired of the scenery, I'm bashing my skull in."

"And if we lock you in the cellar?"

"Then I'm screaming for help until someone calls the cops, and we all get to learn what they find more convincing: 'You've gotta believe me, this lady is secretly Bill Cipher in disguise,' or 'Help me, officer, these lunatics think I'm some kind of demon pyramid!'" Bill rolled his eyes. "I'm not asking for much. Just a little mobility. A few rooms I can move freely in, the occasional conversation, a window or two I can look out of..."

"In other words," Ford said, "if we don't want you to do anything drastic, we need to give you a slight chance to escape."

"See, this is why you're the smart one!" Bill graced Ford with a brilliant smile. "And in return, you've bought yourselves time to look for a guaranteed way to finish me off. It'll be like a game: can you figure out how to get rid of me before I find a way out?"

"I stopped playing games with you a long time ago, Cipher."

"We never stopped playing. You just stopped having fun."

Their negotiations were interrupted by Dani's return. She distributed their meals, then said, "Okay, I've got two guesses. They're dumb, though."

"I'll allow it!"

"Rapunzel or Goldilocks."

"Hey, guess number four! Smart girl! Give her a nice tip, Stanley."

"Stop trying to spend my money."

Dani laughed. "You're joking!"

"No, really! Goldilocks!"

"No, no way. You're totally lying."

Studying her face to gauge how much of her skepticism was sincere, Bill amended himself, "Okay, okay—first name Goldie, last name Locke. Funny though, right?"

"I didn't think I'd get it. Goldilocks the Toga Lady. Ha! You guys enjoy your meals."

Once she was out of hearing range, Ford said, "Here's your situation. You're trapped in a small geographic bubble and surrounded by enemies. You have no money, no identification, no connections, and if you still have any powers at all, they're clearly dampened or we'd be dead by now. Your options are limited even if you do escape—so before you try, think how much less latitude we'll give you once we catch you."

"Sounds like somebody's about to agree to my terms."

Ford glanced at Stan, to see if he wanted to voice any objections; then Soos, as the current owner of the shack; then the kids, with a silent apology for what this would mean for their summer; and when no one protested, Ford said, "You'll stay in the main shack. You can go anywhere that isn't closed behind a door—that means the kitchen, the living room, the R&D room, and the attic. You don't get to enter any room behind a door without supervision. You don't get access to tools, poisons, or anything you could potentially use as a weapon. No phone, no computer, no borrowing anybody's cellular phones, but you can use the TV."

"Question."

"Yes?"

"How will disputes over what to watch on TV be resolved."

"Everybody in the house gets priority over you."

"Now you're just being petty. You won't even say we could vote on TV selections?"

"Fine, let's vote. Who's in favor of being petty and never letting Bill choose what to watch?"

Everyone but Bill raised a hand.

Bill laughed. "Okay, I walked into that! But I want books."

"Fine. You can have books."

"And writing materials."

"Under supervision only."

"Sheesh, paranoid. Okay. And a radio."

Ford considered that.

"Come on, you don't think I could get into trouble with a radio."

"You can use the record player."

"Nobody uses records anymore. I want a CD player."

"Fine."

"Fine." Satisfied, Bill picked up the maple syrup bottle and poured way too much on his pancakes.

Mabel cast a quick, envious glance at Bill's banana octopus. It had chocolate chip eyes and was way cuter than she'd expected.

Bill caught her glance, gave her sugary pile of sprinkles and chocolate an equally covetous look, and said, "Want to go half and half?"

She shoved her plate over. "Like you wouldn't believe!"

Dipper hissed, "Mabel," and Mabel flinched, guiltily glancing toward Ford to see if the Head Bill Cipher Expert had any objections to the pancake swap. Ford grimaced, but said nothing. Mabel had already agreed and Ford couldn't think of anything Bill could have done to an untampered-with plate of pancakes, and if Ford objected on principle he'd just end up making himself look like the bad guy—which he had a sneaking suspicion Bill would immediately pounce on.

Meanwhile, Bill certainly hadn't waited to see if Ford approved. He mercilessly sawed his mushy cephalopod in half, the swap was made before anyone could protest Mabel sharing her bounty of sugar with the worst person in the universe, and Bill gleefully added more maple syrup to his new source of sweet sensory overload. He scooped up a forkful of pancakes, stuck it in his eye, then jerked his head back and stared in confusion when it just hurt. He tried the other eye before he remembered his mouth.

Mabel played with the banana peel tentacles on her half-octopus. At Dipper's grimace, she said, "It's fine, he'll be fine! Octopuses grow back if you cut them in half."

Soos had worked through his burger like popcorn at a movie while he watched Ford and Bill's hostage negotiations. Now that the important decisions had been made and Soos was down to fries, he said, "So, how are we gonna keep Bill out of all the other rooms? Am I gonna have to put locks on every door tomorrow? Because if we just say 'don't go there,' Bill will be like, 'okay,' and then do it anyway, you know?"

"Yeah, Stanford, how are you gonna keep me out of your rooms?" Bill was twirling a piece of bacon around his fork like spaghetti. "I hear I'm pretty sneaky." He stuck the fork in his eye again, winced, and gave it a disappointed look.

"Well—" Ford glanced around to ensure no one was nearby, leaned closer to Bill, and lowered his voice. "I've actually got a clever idea about that."

Instantly intrigued, Bill leaned in closer. "Oh, do you?"

Like he was inviting Bill in to hear a secret, Ford reached past Stan to put a hand on Bill's shoulder—and said, "Amnesia Limina—"

"You—!" Bill tried to jerk out of Ford's grip, but was blocked by a wall of Soos. Soos caught on and grabbed Bill's wrists before he could shove Ford's hand away.

"—Stupidi Digiti—"

"I hate you."

"—Occultus Locus."

A bright red light flashed between Ford's fingers. Bill's eye twitched. He jerked out of Soos's grip and shrugged off Ford's hand. "When did you learn how to play dirty?"

Dipper had watched with such fascination that he hadn't even noticed a chunk of omelet fall off his fork into his lap. "Whoa, what was that?"

"A curse," Ford said. "Cast it on a door, and no one who interacts with it will know how to open it. Cast it on a person, however—and they'll forget how to open any door. We don't have to worry about locking Bill in if he doesn't know how to use a doorknob, do we?"

Bill asked, "What's a doorknob?"

Stan cracked up. Ford grinned at Dipper and gestured at Bill. See?

"Seriously, what's a doorknob? I know every word in the English language, I'd know if 'doorknob' was a word. Is it a wart? A kind of fungus?" Bill sighed irritably. "I taught you that spell. This is how you pay me back for teaching you?"

"No, this is how I pay you back for torturing my family."

"I never tortured your family! Just you."

Mabel raised a hand. "You stuck me in a bubble."

"That wasn't torture. You had a great time."

Dipper said, "You threw me down the stairs and stabbed my arm."

"That was self-torture, and I had a great time."

Ford said, "Well, then—this is payback for myself."

Bill scowled, lips pursed, expression sour; and then spat a thick, milky wad of phlegm onto Ford's omelet.

Stan rounded on Bill so fast he kneed the table.

Ford put a hand on Stan's shoulder to stop him from making a scene. Calmly, he cut around the chunk of soiled omelet, scooped it up, and dropped it in Bill's milkshake.

Everyone tried to ignore how a crooked smile threatened to break through Bill's scowl. As if he was almost having fun.

When they left, in lieu of the extra tip Bill had wanted Stan to give the waitress, he turned over his paper menu and drew a map to an eighty-year-old buried cache of stolen jewelry just a fifteen minute walk from the diner.

He'd finished his milkshake, egg and all.

####

#bill cipher #human bill cipher #gravity falls #gravity falls fanart #gravity falls fic #my writing #bill goldilocks cipher

135 notes · View notes