#sorry if this doesn't make sense it did in my head

[honeipie]

THE WIFE

izuku midoryia x reader

synopsis: you’ve been asked to do an interview after your husbands cute little story blew up. now it’s your turn to express your love for him

authors note: to the anon who did the ask i am SO SORRY. i posted it by accident then fucking deleted it in a panic.. don’t worry though i got the gist of it! for the people who don't know it was getting the reader's POV of how they fell in love with izuku as well. also sorry if i went a little off track. i js wanted to give reader a lil opinion and personality ☺️

you can find part one here

this was out of your comfort zone.

you sat in a plush chair across from a woman who was currently fiddling with the microphones. your husband izuku had done an interview with a popular podcast about a month ago. it wasn’t only popular because he was the number one hero. there was a charm to the episode that others couldn’t fake. the way he talked about you as if you showed him colors for the first time. everyone loved it.

now people really wanted to get into the lives of the midoryia’s, which included you. about a week ago you had gotten an offer to be on another podcast. you made sure to check out some of her work before you leaped into it.

the host's name was aiya, and she was absolutely amazing. not only were you laughing with the one episode you did listen to, but so did izuku since he was kind enough to watch with you.

"are you ready mrs. midoryia?" aiya asked going to put on the headphones. taking your own set of headphones, you placed them on as well.

"i am! plus you can just call me y/n. i really don't mind"

"thanks for letting me know," she clicked a button on her computer which started the camera up "hello everyone! it's aiya here! on this special episode we have the wonderful, and very lovely y/n midoryia in the building"

you gave a shy smile and waved to the camera "hello everyone!" you faced the aiya letting her smile ease your tensions "i just wanted to say thank you before we start. not only for inviting me on your podcast, but just being so respectful and kind as well"

aiya nodded placing both hands over her heart "you're just too kind! but girl you don't have to thank me for doing the bare minimum"

"no i really do have to. because there are a lot of other people out here that i've talked to and are not as professional and sweet like you. it's really crazy" you shook your head when you heard yourself start to get off topic "i'm sorry i don't want to control this whole interview. i think i got the rambling from my husband through the years"

both you and aiya laughed at your statement.

"don't worry about it! this is not a place where i will every cut you off from rambling, seriously. plus i want to get into some of that as well. what is your experience with the whole ‘being a wife of the number one hero’ thing? like you said before people can be unusually cruel to you for absolutely no reason"

you scoffed dramatically making aiya laugh.

"so when people ask me this in person, which has never happened ever" you made direct eye contact with the camera before turning back. this had aiya laughing more now than before "being married to izuku is great, but being married to deku can be.. iffy on my end. does that make sense?”

"yes and no"

"okay so what i mean is that being deku's wife is stressful. not only because of the major backlash that i get from the internet, tabloids, and gossip shows, but also because of my safety. the backlash is something that doesn't go away but gets easier as time goes on. for me it was easier to just laugh at how stupid they are. like one article called me fat, cool, but then another one from the same company called me pile of bones skinny" you tilted you head slapping one hand down on your thigh "now you just look fucking stupid because you can't pick one and clearly can't run a business. cause like how didn't you know that both of these articles were coming out?" you shook your head "they piss me off more than make me upset"

aiya listened carefully letting you go on with your rant.

"but when i say i love being izuku’s wife i really mean it. i love that man more than i love anyone else. i love the way he looks when he wakes up in the morning. i love the way he gets excited every time we see cows when we're driving. he is who i was meant to be with and i believe that with my whole heart. i see deku and izuku as two totally different people because i get to see it from both perspectives. i can understand how some people might not understand where i’m coming from with this and that’s okay. this is just how i’ve been able to express the way i feel about the whole situation”

“wow.. thank you so much for sharing your point of view on things. i hope this really opens the eyes to some of the haters out there”

“ugh me too” you played with the ring on your finger “i feel bad now. when this episode airs i can just imagine what he’s gonna say, ‘oh so my episode was me spewing my undying love for you and all i get is i hate my husband?’”

the two of you laughed thinking about it.

“no, but we’ve seriously talked about it before and he understands where i’m coming from. i love that he’s so understanding about everything”

“speaking of love,” aiya pulled out a piece of paper coming from her lap “we’ve got questions”

you clapped your hands together excitedly.

“oh! hit me”

“okay so of course deku did a podcast episode where he made all of us singles jealous by describing the moment he fell in love with you. so now people are wondering what was the moment you fell in love with him?”

you had been preparing for this question ever since you read the email.

“i actually fell in love with izuku pretty early in our relationship. maybe like a month in? i’ve honestly had a crush on him since year one, but we never got the chance to interact.”

it was early off in your third year when you had come down with a bad fever. the only reason you could assume the sickness took over you was because everyone had just moved back into the dorms. bringing whatever kind of diseases they wanted back.

“hi izuku”

the phone was placed on the pillow beside your head. you didn’t have enough energy to hold it up. hell, you’re surprised you even had enough energy to accept the call. everything on your body was just hot. they only thing you felt you needed was a cold compress on your forehead, but getting up just wasn’t an option at the moment.

“y/n you’re making me worried. are you sure you don’t need recovery girl?”

“i should be okay,” you stopped in the middle of your sentence to take in a long breath “plus i don’t think she could help with what i have anyway”

izuku was slipping on his training uniform as he was talking to you. he didn’t know if you could hear yourself, or if you even cared, but he could probably picture what you looked like. comforter thrown to the floor. medicine bottles scattered on your dresser and not knowing which one to choose.

“are you sure you don’t need anything?”

“i should be fine izu. just focus on- on training for the festival. bye now”

izuku had wanted to get a couple more sentences in to ease his anxiety, but you quickly hung up the phone without a second thought.

once you found yourself a semi-comfortable position you took the chance of drifting off to sleep.

the nap lasted about thirty minutes before you woke up to the feeling of a cold compress being laid onto your forehead. slowly, your eyes opened to reveal your boyfriend making sure it was in the right spot.

“izu” you mumbled going to sit up but he placed his hands on your shoulders laying you back down.

“nope, you’re resting”

he still had his training uniform on from the time you had called him.

“but you shouldn’t be here. you should be training”

the newfound coolness on your forehead felt amazing, and part of you wished he had came sooner.

“i can take a day or two off. it’s fine”

you shook your head gently.

“i don’t want you to miss it because of me”

“y/n are you me?”

“no”

“are you my teacher?”

“no, but-“

“then don’t worry about it. your health means more to me than training. i’ve been working hard for the past two years, so if i have to take a day or two off to take care of my girlfriend then i’m jumping at the opportunity”

it was right then and there you felt some of the weight lift of your shoulders. this felt like confirmation of what you had assumed you were feeling from the moment you first saw him.

you loved him.

you loved him so, so much.

taglist! @sagejin 🫶🏾

lmk if you’d like to be added

#honeipie #anime #bnha x reader #mha #writing #x reader #drabble #izuku x reader #izuku midoriya #mha izuku #bnha izuku #deku x reader #mha deku #bnha deku #my hero academia #bnha #izuku midoryia x you

[yazthebookish]

"If Azriel wants a mate then why is he pursuing a mated female."

He gave you the answer:

"The Cauldron chose three sisters. Tell me how it's possible that my two brothers are with two of those sisters, yet the third was given to another." He had never before dared speak the words aloud.  

Let's start by a scenario where you [the reader] is desperately and hopelessly in love with someone whether they're mated or not, would the mating bond make a difference for you?

If you answer yes, then you admit that a mated pairing are unlike any other because they're connected on a soul level and that's why it would make a difference to you.

If you answer no, then the mating bond wouldn't be an important condition for you because you can love the person with or without a bond. The mating bond wouldn't be at the forefront when someone asks you to explain why you would pursue or want someone.

Now back to Azriel, why does it matter if Elain wasn't his mate? Would that make his "feelings" for her less meaningful?

If he is very confident Elain has no interest in Lucien, then why is he upset about her being mated to someone else?

"But he could be her second mate or true mate"

As of canon, there was no mention of multiple mates and it's been proven more than once that Elain and Lucien's bond is legit (they're a unique case because all other mated pairings knew about the bond when they were already in love). You have to twist the context to make it seem suspicious or out of the norm—and the only thing that is out of the norm here is unlike the other mated couples, they're the first one we see that aren't in love "yet".

So excluding the theory that he is Elain's true mate or that he is her second mate, doesn't his confession to Rhys prove that he is desperate for a bond.

He used Feysand and Nessian as an example because the equation in his head is not making sense with him being excluded from also getting an Archeron sister as a mate. To him, 3 brothers + 3 sisters makes sense but was that even a condition for either Rhys or Cassian to fall in love with either sisters? No.

And you know what are the two biggest red flags here:

1. He immediately questions the Cauldron not giving him a mate, or more specifically, the Cauldron gifting his brothers two Archeron sisters but the third wasn't his.

2. Does Elain want a mating bond with him, or anything to do with a bond at all? Based on what we've seen... no.

So the first point shows you that it wasn't his attraction or feelings for Elain that Azriel expressed or could've said things that came off more romantic like "I want her" "I've grown fond of her" "I feel good with her"—because I promise you he didn't need to do a whole love confession to Rhys to convince him and Rhys would've had a very different reaction than what we have seen.

But what we got was Azriel questioning the Cauldron and be visibly upset about not getting an Archeron sister—that what probably ticked off Rhys.

OR we, as the readers, were in his head so he didn't need to vocalize his feelings to Rhys (since the argument is often about he doesn't open up), we could've just read his thoughts

He is putting what he wants at the forefront without considering whether Elain wants a mating bond or not.

And then you have the final nail in the coffin:

Azriel said nothing. He hadn't gotten that far with his planning, certainly not beyond the fantasies he pleasured himself to.  

Is this what it all boiled down to? Fantasies?

Where in his entire conversation with Rhys did the topic center on what Elain wanted or needed?

"Oh but Azriel did say she has no interest in Lucien and is making it clear to Rhys"

Sorry but that's Elain's piece to say and no where were we given any hint that Elain asked or opened up to Azriel about this. He is yet doing something that everyone else does for Elain: speak for her and assume what she needs.

Though I completely disagree with the idea that Azriel is a fuck boy. He isn't but this is a male that carries a lot of conflicted feelings and thoughts within him—his actions and words can be questionable but it doesn't mark him as someone who is a player. He is just hitting rock bottom.

[gadriezmannsgirl]

Hello 🎶 it's meeeeee 🎼

Buenas, beautiful lady. I want to request something to youuuu (obvio cause I'm in your inbox 😂)

Can you do something inspired on the new smw photoshoot Pedri did 😩🔥🩷 pretty please! Do what you want, go crazy on me 😀❤️

Señorita, you're always bienvenida in my inbox💜✨ Pedri will make me go crazy😭😭 he's so gorgeous I can't even explain how beautiful that man is, dear lord😭!

Warnings: mentions of sexy times, nothing graphic it's safe for everyone to read, Pedri being a lil confident ass, reader being head over heels for Pedri. This probably doesn't make any sense💀😭 and sorry in advance if it doesn't, it's been a while since I've written something😭

Tease -P.G8

Summary: He said he wasn't feeling confident about the shoot, the results show the opposite.

"C'mon, amor. You'll look great even if you're wearing a trash suit!"

"You say that because you're my girlfriend"

"No, I say that because I'm a woman with two eyes who know how to appreciate beauty and you, mi amor, have lots of it" Pedri rolled his eyes as you shook your head and fixed the collar of the beige suit.

"I suddenly don't want to do this" He sighs "I enjoy being more in a sweatshirt and joggers"

"I know you do and you will be in sweatshirts and joggers once again when this shoot it's done, it'll be quick"

"Not quick enough"

"What will you do when you're getting your wedding suit done?"

"Wait for you to get your wedding dress done so we can marry?" You smile at him.

"Well played" He laughed softly "But let me tell you that I actually enjoy seeing you in suits, it's not often I get to see you like that, you look incredibly handsome and more mature, like a CEO... and it makes me wanna jump all over you" You state wrapping your arms around his neck, a smirk came up to your boyfriend's face and he wrapped his arms around you.

"I don't need to be in suits for you to do that" You blush and laugh.

"True. You breathe and I'm all crazy for you, González" He laughs pecking your lips a few times.

"C'mon, let's go"

"Thought you didn't wanted to do the photoshoot right away?"

"I want to get home, my girlfriend said she wants to jump all over me, I'm never passing up those chances" He winked at you while he left the room leaving you giggly and running behind him to catch him.

"Pedri, I'll need you to act confident, move around, own the shoot" The photographer said getting ready behind his camera

"I think I can do that"

"¿Qué crees? Venga mi amor, tú puedes. Vamos, con confianza" (You think? C'mon, mi amor, you can. C'mon, confidence)

And with confidence he did it. It was only a few days later when you found yourself screaming all over your house after seeing his latest IG post.

"¿Qué pasa, preciosa? ¿Todo bien? ¿Por qué el grito?" (What's wrong, precious? Is everything okay? Why the scream?)

"¿Eres tonto?" (Are you stupid?)

"¿Disculpa?" (Excuse me?)

"¿Cómo te atreves a subir fotos de ese estilo sin avisarme?" (How dare you upload photos like that without telling me?) You looked at him in disbelief "Don't you think my ovaries will explode after watching this?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Can we have your tux for our wedding done in this color? You look absolutely gorgeous-ah! oh dear god! your hair, your face, your eyes, your eyebrows... your hands! I never knew your wrist would look so good with a simple watch!"

"Y/N, can you calm down and explain to me what is going on?"

"How do you want me to calm down with you dropping these pictures?" You show your phone screen for the first time to him "I really want to have your babies, right now, Pedro González López"

Reality hit him and he started laughing. You. His girlfriend were fangirling over him.

"We can practice for them"

"How do you look so beautiful every day, every time, every second? Like... You don't get tired of it? Amor, I don't really understand what were you nervous about! I'm so lucky to have you as my boyfriend, I get to have you, all of you! ¡Dude, buah!" You let go of your phone letting it fall on the carpet still looking at Pedri "You're so pretty, I love you so much"

Pedri was blushing and his giggles were the only thing you were hearing "I love you too" He said wrapping his arms around you

"How can you be so hot and so cute at the same time?" You asked with a smile on "It's not possible"

"Welcome to the club, I have to deal every day with you being cute and sexy at the same time" You kissed his lips.

He was perfect.

"You knew what you were doing, right?" You asked after a bit of silence.

"I mean... I didn't know it would have this effect on you but I definitely need to keep doing photoshoots in suits"

"You little bastard-"

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviymarcsbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela

#gadriezmannsgirl writes! #pedri x reader #pedri gonzalez x reader #pedri blurb #pedri icons #pedri gonzalez icons #pedri gonzalez blurb #pedri fluff #football players x reader #football players fanfic #football imagines #pedri #gadriezmannsgirl replies

[firewasabeast]

In This My Weakness

Summary: A week before the wedding, Buck gets a devastating call that his parents won't be coming.

read below or on ao3. I'm thinking of making a part two as well, but this fic can be read alone.

Tommy could tell something was wrong before Buck even hung up the phone. His smile had all but disappeared and the gleam that was usually always in his eyes was now replaced by a cloud of darkness.

Tommy's arm instinctually reached out to rest on the back of the couch, giving Buck the perfect spot to fall into. “What's wrong?” he asked, Buck gripping his phone tightly, staring down at it.

“They're uh- they're not coming,” Buck answered, his voice cracking.

Tommy was confused. He hadn't actually heard the phone call. Buck had been in the kitchen of their new place when he answered, then quickly stepped outside. Tommy had only been reading his facial expressions through the glass door.

“Who's not coming where?” he asked slowly.

Buck sighed. He bit the bottom of his lip before responding. Tommy knew that was something he'd do when he was trying not to let his emotions take over. “Mom and dad,” he replied, “to the wedding. They're not- um, they're not coming to the wedding.”

“What?!” Tommy turned to better face Buck on the couch. “What do you mean they're not coming to the wedding, Evan?”

Buck shrugged. Tommy knew he was barely holding it together, trying to play it down, make it seem like it didn't bother him as much as it really did. But, at least to Tommy, Buck was a terrible liar.

“Evan, honey, speak to me, please. Why aren't your parents coming to our wedding?”

Another shrug, but Buck looked away from his phone this time. He glanced over at Tommy, who could now see the redness in his eyes. He was fighting to keep the tears away.

“They, um, th- they said they had planned a cruise like a year ago and forgot until now, apparently.”

Tommy ran his hands through his hair, eyes wide, feeling more confused now than before. “I'm sorry, what? Evan, that doesn't make any sense.”

“I guess they didn't get insurance for the cruise, so if they cancel they don't get their money back, and they completely forgot until they got a reminder email this morning.” Buck shook his head and let out a laugh. “I guess I shouldn't be surprised.”

“No, you should very much be surprised. They can't get money back for a cruise so they cancel on their son's wedding? This doesn't make any sense. Should I call them? I'll call them.”

As Tommy went to reach for his phone, Buck laid a hand over his, stopping him. “No, Tommy, don't. I- I really appreciate it, but it's fine. Really. I'm fine.”

Buck patted Tommy's hand, then got up and started making his way back into the kitchen. He had been in the middle of cleaning some things up when he got the call, so he needed to go finish that.

Except, at least to Tommy, the conversation was very far from over. So he got up as well and followed Buck.

“I just don't get it,” he said. “Can they switch dates? I've had to do that for trips before.”

“I asked that. But whatever cruise they're going on doesn't go back to those same places for a few months, or something... I don't know. The answer was no, though.”

“What all did they say? I feel like I'm getting a third of the story here.”

“They said what I told you. Can't make it, have a cruise, no refunds, send their love... and a blender, I guess.”

“We already have two blenders.”

“And now we'll have a backup for our backup.” Since they got into the kitchen, Buck had been avoiding eye contact. He was keeping busy, moving dishes from the drain to their spots in the cabinet, clanging silverware together as he tossed them into a drawer, and even moving spices from their usual spots on the spice rack to new spots.

“Well, should we- should we change our date then?” Tommy asked. Yes, they both wanted to get married on the anniversary of the day they first met but, if they needed to adjust for the Buckley's, they would.

The question stopped Buck in his tracks. Still turned away from Tommy, he lowered his hands to rest them on the counter. “We're not changing our date.”

“Evan.”

“No,” he doubled down, firmer this time. “We're not changing our dates. If they can't make an effort to show up, then they just won't be there.”

Now Tommy was starting to get somewhere. Sometimes it took a minute, but Buck would always eventually let his true feelings out.

“If you're sure.”

“I am.” Buck finally turned to face Tommy. He wiped at his eyes, letting out a humorless laugh. “I really thought we were getting somewhere, you know? I thought... I thought they cared.”

“Ev, I think they care, they just-”

“Prioritize a cruise over our marriage.” Buck finished.

“We could Facetime them,” Tommy offered weakly.

Buck shook his head. “No, if they- if they can't show up they don't need to be there at all.” He wiped at his eyes again, but this time the tears couldn't be held back. He felt like a little kid again, his lip trembling, head down, trying to quiet his sobs so his parents couldn't hear him.

But his parents weren't there this time; Tommy was. He was there, and he was wrapping Buck up in a hug before Buck even realized he had crossed the room.

He held on tight, clutching the back of Tommy's shirt. His shoulders shook with the force of his cries, but Tommy held on.

He always held on. His strength, both mentally and physically, kept Buck upright during his toughest moments.

Buck did the same for Tommy too. That's why this relationship worked so perfectly. They didn't go fifty-fifty here; they both gave one hundred percent of themselves.

“I re- really wanted them th- there,” he managed to get out through little breaths.

“I know, I know,” Tommy soothed, running a hand up and down Buck's back.

“They were s- supposed to walk me down the a- aisle.” He pulled back from Tommy just enough to look up at him. “Oh God, what are we gonna do about that?”

“Hey, hey, don't worry about it,” Tommy said, bringing his hand up to Buck's face. He used his thumbs to gently wipe the tears from his cheeks. “We'll figure something out. We don't have to do the walking down the aisle, or my mom can walk us both, or we'll walk together, or-” he paused, “or you could ask Bobby and Athena.”

Buck sucked in another breath, contemplating the idea. “That's- You think they'd do that?”

Tommy smiled softly. “Of course they would. They wouldn't hesitate for a second.”

“Bobby's already doing the ceremony though.”

Tommy shrugged. “Doing things a little differently than normal is the Buckley way, isn't it?”

Buck managed a shaky laugh. “The Buckley-Kinard way now. Sorry you're stuck with me.”

Tommy shook his head. “I'm not.” He placed two fingers under Buck's chin, just like the night he first kissed Evan. The night he tried to play it cool, all while his heart was racing and mind filled with a million different thoughts. He kissed him softly, slowly. He could feel Buck's body relax, some of the weight from the last few minutes falling away.

“I love you, Evan.”

Buck reached up, running his hand through the back of Tommy's hair. There were a lot of people that told Buck they loved him. Some, he believed, others... not so much. But there was one person who he believed it every single time, and he was gonna marry that man in a week, no matter who was or wasn't there.

“I love you too.”

#evan buckley #bucktommy #911 #tommy kinard #buck x tommy #tevan #buck and tommy #buck tommy

[hauntedpearl]

oh wait. chewing chewing chewing. none of this might make sense to you and I'm sorry but it makes sense to me. mmm. dean on the back porch. he's drinking coffee i think..his brother won't let him spike it. he's inside and he's talking to someone about something. there's a lot of words that have everything to do with what dean's been doing to himself over the past few months, and sam tries to talk quiet and fast, but dean hears him anyway because he's keyed up and also because he's attuned to Sam's movements like that, can't help it. anyway. he's sitting. on the back porch. and his brother won't let him spike his coffee. the view from the backyard is not anything to write home about. the house is in the middle of nowhere and the lawn slopes down a little into woods that crowd the edge of the property. he likes it here, even tho it's landlocked, and nothing like the house he dreams about with a lake and a pier and a little dinghy tied to it and a town not half a hand away, and friends and. well. it's still nice, tho. he's looking at the trees. it's almost time for sunset and they are tall, still things, old things, and it's comforting being around them.

but then the sky splits open.

and there's cas. (and jack. also. obviously.)

but there's cas! is the thing!

he doesn't know what it is, if he's fallen into a stupor of some kind, if he did manage to spike his coffee somehow and he's just forgotten, and considering how his life's been lately, he wouldn't be surprised if that really did happen.

still, his body moves before his mind stops spinning and he pulls cas into his arms. somewhere behind him, he's aware of the house and his brother and the coffee sinking into the porch steps that he'd rebuilt not a week ago. he thinks god, thank god, thank god. says, baby, sweetheart, I'm sorry. says, I didn't think I'd see you again. I don't know what the fuck happened, but I'll — I'll fix it all. I'll fix everything. I'll make it up to you.

he cups cas' cheek and thinks, here, this here is my second shot at this. I won't get out. i won't rock the boat this time. I won't let anything ruin this.

but then cas looks at him like he doesn't understand, like he's a little scared, and his eyes go round and glassy and he says dean? the way he's never said it before, not even in dean's head.

yeah? he says, and his mouth is dry, and there's a moment when cas tilts his head and frowns and dean swears he sees a star light up behind those ridiculous eyes.

oh, cas says, mouth parting in a sigh. and dean's gotta be going crazy because he's back where he's wanted to go ever since sam came to him, but everything feels wrong and his skin itches and the forest is still there, although dean is wishing the lake back with everything in him, and cas is stepping back from him. he's digging his fingers into dean's arms. he's shaking him, and dean feels it in his teeth, weak that he is in this body.

what did you do?! and cas sounds hysterical in a way that should not have been familiar to him, but is, because he's wretched, and he doesn't know how to not destroy the things he loves.

i — he says, and what excuse does he have really, for anything. i —

the door at his back clicks open, and the world comes back to dean, all in a breath.

this is not a dream and this really is cas and dean's touching him like he's allowed to. behind him, footsteps rushing, and the catch of breath.

christ, said in wonder. fucking christ. is it really you?

dean pulls his hands back like he's burned and steps away from the only person that's ever wanted him the way he's wanted them. he stumbles as he slips out of cas' grasp, disbelief, and terror, and worst of all, hope, making his skin buzz.

this is real, he says to himself. (but it couldn't be, could it? maybe he's lost sense of it, whatever real is supposed to he..and now. now cas is here. and he's...empty.) he turns his gaze to his hands, his hands, shaking, but his. they have to be his.

he hears more than feels the scrape of his brother's palm against his shirt.

hey, he says, and he's using that voice on him, the one he uses when he's talking to victims and widows and children that have too much fight in them for their own good. hey, dean, come on. hey.

from far away, he hears, what did he do? and let's just. let's just go inside, alright? we'll talk about it and oh, dean. and that's why I couldn't find you and dean's ears are ringing now, because what the fuck..

what the fuck.

someone leads him back up the wooden steps by his arm, and he kicks the fallen mug onto the grass. he looks behind him and sees the trenchcoat, and backwards tie, and windswept hair and tired, tired eyes and behind him, another face, one dean's tried to erase from his mind like a coward, now pinched and pitying, and dean cannot take it, feels like he's going to explode. (like a ripe melon on the sun.)

he frees himself of his brother's grip. turns to face cas again. it's me, cas says, before he can say anything. really me. and dean says, do you remember? was it you in there, too? and cas says, not all of it. not really. it's complicated. and dean looks at the face, and thinks about him the last time they were this close, and alone, and running from death and God, the way tears pooled in his eyes.

i hurt you, he says and cas presses his lips together. swallows. says, yes.

and dean says, and it was you.

and cas says, yes.

and dean steps back, breathing hard. says, god. god. says, I'm sorry. and cas' lips turn up on a corner, a small smile that is all sadness, like forgiveness sits in his lungs, all the time, like it is easy as breath. dean can't take that either. dean wishes cas would get mad, for once. wishes he would raise his fists like he used to, wishes he'd stick the right end of hsi blade in his heart, and let him sink into his lap.

but cas is cas, and cas is good, and dean cannot — should not — be here.

I'm sorry, he says again. turns on his heels and takes off.

~

he drives for a day and change, sleeps in his car under an overpass, until he ends up somewhere cold and by the ocean (idk where!!!) and he climbs up one of those cliffs and sits there watching the water like silk in the night, and letting the wind slice his skin, and trying not to let thought take form in his mind.

dean thinks he's barely calmed down when he hears the snap crackle of electricity and the beating of wings and cas appears at his side, his sleeves rolled up and his trenchcoat open and his knees under his chin.

dean doesn't know what to say to him. so he says nothing. an eternity later:

it isn't like that, cas says. i don't remember everything. i don't *know* everything. just...images. snippets. feelings.

dean clenches his eyes shut. then, broken, and wet, I couldn't stand it. I couldn't live with myself. I didn't know how to do it. without you.

and cas is silent. when he speaks, his voice is deeper, and cracking just a little, I didn't think. i didn't think you would care. so much.

and dean laughs, because why would he have thought that. what reason did dean give him to think that.

yeah, he says. yeah. no. I know.

cas' hand trembles when it lands on dean's shoulder. the same one that he's marred twice now.

tell me about it, cas says. the good stuff. the — the breakfasts and. and the holidays. the boat. fishing. he breathes, even though he's never needed to. leans towards dean, like he can't quite bear the weight of his own body. please. dean. tell me —

I loved you, dean says, abrupt. twists his torso, and cas is so close, he's practically breathing into his mouth. it comes out harsh, and strange and not at all like the soft thing that dean had been chasing through everything. he shakes his head. lifts a finger to touch cas' cheek. it feels real, so real. skin and stubble and warmth. he tries again, pressing his voice into the shape of his feelings. I loved you. and you loved me. that — that was it. for a while. that was the good part.

cas says nothing, and dean takes the moment to finally let his eyes wander up to his face. to finally look. the moonlight paints him in shadows, and dean folds his index finger under his thumb, lets himself trace the cut of his cheek with it. in the night, Cas' eyes are grey and blue and bright, and they sinks into his skin, rippling into soft folds. precious things, cushioned in lines and laughter and time.

cas' lips tremble. I forgive you, he says. for the bad part. for all the — for everything else.

dean can't help himself. he leans his forehead against Cas' presses his crooked nose into his cheek. lets his hand slip to the back of his neck.

you shouldn't.

is that what you want? cas asks. for me to be angry?

.

.

.

[the muses are breaking up with me. also it's 2 am and I have work tomorrow.]

but basically. sth sth. cas saying something along the lines of. im angry. im so angry. but it's like he's angry at dean for doing the things he was doing and he's angry that dean never told him how much he was keeping inside and he's angry that he's home and dean fled from him (godbless this man he's so stupid <3 he really said torture what) and he's like and i will be angry for the rest of my life if that's what you want but please. please come home with me.

and dean says. okay. and cas says okay?

and dean says okay.

love confession. kisses. etc.,

#doe is talking again #THIS IS SO UNNECESSARILY PROSE-Y FOR A POST #anyway. #possible ending for the evil love persevering au #girls this fic literally does not have the most important middle lmaooooooooo #fine it's whatever #destiel stuff #all this talking about resolving and not resolving things gave me a burst of inspo i think #bye bye my favourite wip i have 30-40.0 #pages of written notes about. #one day i hope to write you

[melanieph321]

Hi lovely,

I’m actually kind of new to Tumblr so I don’t know how this works but you were actually one of the first bloggers that popped up on my feed with your post about Kenan Yildiz 😭and I really enjoyed reading it so much. And then I clicked on your feed and noticed that you take request I don’t know if you do that anymore but I wanted to give it a try. I was thinking that maybe the reader and Kenan are dating but keeping it private since she’s the sister of one of his best friends on the team (maybe Vlahović) So when Juventus celebrated their win ,against another club, they went to a restaurant to celebrate and the waiter was constantly hitting on the reader which made Kenan very jealous so he made sure the waiter knows who you belong with(maybe giving the reader a hickey) and he made sure that the waiter saw how Kenan followed you to the bathroom.

I don’t know if that makes sense to you but anyways just wanted to get that of my chest 💕🎀

Love this! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🔥🔥🔥🔥

Kenan Yildiz x Reader - Claim Me Part 1/3

Enjoy!

"I have to go."

"What, no. Five more minutes."

"Kenan." You chuckled. The hardest part was always to get him off of you. After Juventus successful Copa Italia win against Atalanta, it was practically impossible. Kenan had you escaping yesterdays celebrations by sneaking back to his hotel room. There you did unspeakable things to each other. Fun. But unspeakable things.

"Fuck, you're so hot." He mumbled and planted soft kisses against your neck.

"Thank you." You giggled and did not reject the way he wanted to keep you in bed with him. However, there was just one small problem...

"I have to get back to my room before my family notices that I'm gone."

"Relax, I saw your sister dancing on top of a table before we left the club last night. I'm sure she'll still be passed out drunk by the time you get back."

"Yes, my sister perhaps, but my brother won't be."

Kenan raised his head from the crook of your neck. The mentioning of Dusan always set him off, especially if you mentioned him in a moment of intimacy, which has happened more than once before.

"He'll be the first one to look for me." You nodded.

Kenan sighed and rolled onto his back, letting you go.

"Thank you." You bent down to kiss his lips before rushing to the bathroom. However, you did not remain in there for long.

"Fuck!"

You were quick to stumbled back into the room, a hand covering your throat and a struck of panic in your eyes.

"What?" Kenan asked, seeing the expression on your face.

"I hate you."

"What did I do?"

"Kenan, you didn't."

"I didn't do what?" He said, rightfully confused.

You released the hand covering your throat, revealing a hickey the size of a coin.

"Fuck."

"Yes, fuck you." You sprung towards the bed, ambushing your boyfriend with harmless punches to the sheets.

"Baby." He chuckled. "I'm really sorry, okay."

"Sorry? Sorry won't cut it Kenan, Dusan will kill me if he sees it."

Kenan caught your hands, preventing you from throwing any more punches. "You mean me." He said. "I'm pretty sure I'll be the first one your brother would want to kill."

"Think again. He doesn't even know that we're seeing each other Kenan,  I'm the one he's gonna kill."

"Well, maybe it's time we tell him that we're together then?"

You paused, eyes searching your boyfriend's face. He had soft features. Trying to cover them up with a cut to his eyebrow only made him look more like a puppy dog. "You're out of your mind." You said and climbed off of him.

"Right. I'm out of my mind for wanting to be able to hold my girlfriends hand in public, or better yet, kiss her in public."

"Yes, Kenan. You're out of your mind for that. I've told you that my brother won't allow it."

"Well, maybe it's time you stick up to your brother then? Or perhaps our relationship is not worth the hassle?"

It's not that easy, you thought.

Despite what Kenan thought, it was not that easy. You had always been the baby of the family, the youngest three. Your oldest brother Dusan always watched over you like a hawk. But as you grew older, you began to feel suffocated by his constant protection. You longed for the freedom to make your own decisions and live your own life. But that wasn't the case right now.

"I'm back!" You announced, after receiving about a dusin text message from Dusan on your way up the hotel elevator. You had just shut the door behind you when his head popped out from the bathroom.

"Where have you been?" He asked. Getting up before seven AM after a night of celebrations was mental. But that's just who your brother was, a control freak in all things.

"I was just out for a run." You said.

"Wearing heels?"

He shot a glance at the pair that you were holding in your hands.

"Yes, Dusan. In my heels. It's a trend, look it up."

He shook his head but did not question you further. "Remember, be ready for lunch with the team this afternoon."

"Right." You crossed the joint living area on your way to your bedroom.

"I mean it, Y/N. Remind Nina to be ready on time as well."

"Yeah, yeah. I will."

You shut the door behind you and were quick to peel down the laces to your dress, stepping out of it. You left it on the floor,  amongst the other scattered clothes in the dungeon that you and your sister had been sharing for the weekend. She lay fast asleep as you joined her under the covers. Sometimes, you wondered how the two of you turned out so chill while Dusan got the off gene. I guess you'd never find out.

#fanfiction #football imagine #footballer x reader #footballer imagine #football angst #kenan yildiz #dusan vlahovic #kenan yildiz x reader #juventus fc

[the-starlight-project]

So I got a list of theories, I am sorry if this is too long to answer, but I had to share my thoughts with you guys.

Shamdow is probably the least aware of everything going on. He seems genuinely confused and concerned about Sonic/Nicky, even when Sonic/Nicky is "new."

Shillver (thanks to whoever came up with this name) knows the most. After all, why would you randomly be on a rooftop standing in the rain and hiding behind a door you got smacked with? Surprised there was no audible sound of a man swearing upon being smacked by a METAL DOOR.

Both of Tails actors are siblings. It was common for some characters to be played by siblings due to similarities with them at young ages. Though based on the photo and the fact these follow the games, these two most likely acted in the Sonic Generations season of this show.

Knuckle's actor is probably the one who constantly needs to keep people on track, and he is probably the one who has the angry writing on that board. I also feel like he is the one who actually takes care of Cheese since chaos are associated with the Master Emerald. It would make sense for Knuckle's actor to still have a slight connection to it, even if he doesn't in real life.

Cassy is for sure Rouge. Shadow and Rouge were both introduced in the same game, so it would make sense for both to be introduced the same season. I am going to guess she is also Shamdow's roommate, mainly because it seems like the two would live together before they get into acting.

Cream's actor is probably the least seen, but most liked of the cast. She definitely seems like she embodies Cream herself, whether she is acting or not.

Blaze's actor might know part of what is going on, but not fully. Blaze and Silver do have a somewhat close relation in the game they appeared in, and afterwards it was more of Deja Vu due to weird Sonic Game timeline stuff, so Blaze's actor may know something because of Shillver.

Amy's actor has a scar on her cheeks. I have a feeling she accidentally got it on set, since her character does weird a hammer, and I am sure some balance issues may happen time to time, resulting in a few falls.

Eggman's actor is probably the sweetest man alive, or the most evil man you'll ever meet. Either way, he appeared in the first few pages and is for sure going to be seen later.

Sonic/Nicky isn't "new" as the studio suggests, they just use the "new" story to make everyone believe he was replaced. I am going to guess that if Sonic/Nicky has been there the entire time since the shows creation, the studio had some really clever ways to hide stuff. Especially if Sonic/Nicky is still a teenager after 30+ years.

Lastly, if Sonic Generations is a season, then who was the Classic Sonic actor? Does Sonic/Nicky have any siblings and doesn't know/realize it, or is it just some random blue hedgehog actor that the studio randomly found and knew would make for a believeable younger Sonic?

I gotta say, we're both so sad you're anonymous right now - this was an awesome string of theories and we wanted to give you props!

I can't answer all of them in depth, as you probably guessed, but I'll go ahead and confirm what I can right now!

Shamdow is definitely the least aware, and Shillver (as of right now) is the most aware of the characters that have been introduced.

I can't even make a snarky comment on this or anything, you just hit ALL of the Tails portion of this theory on the head. They are indeed siblings, and both did participate in the Generations season!

Knuckles' actor was definitely the one writing on the board, but I can't tell you anything else about him for now... except for the fact that he doesn't take care of Cheese LMAO

Cassy is definitely Rouge. They aren't roommates, but they were technically new friends when they were introduced. They met during the casting for SA2.

Cream is seen the least for a reason.

Blaze's actor doesn't really know what's going on, but I'd say they're suspicious. Also, they're not too close with Shillver, but they're friends enough.

All of the section about Amy's actor is correct! She did get that little scar on set, during the filming of Sonic CD! I'm sure you can guess where.

Eggman's actor(s) is definitely ... a man. He's nice! He's nice.

The studio definitely has some really clever (and morally dubious) ways of hiding things. There have been several occasions where more extreme measures were needed, though.

Classic Sonic definitely has an actor! He's his own entity, has his own life (and is connected to Amy's actor in his own ways). They aren't siblings or anything (though that's not to say that Sonic doesn't have any).

#starlight au #project starlight #starlight ask tag! #mw replies #sb replies

[everrgrreeen]

I think the thing that kills me the most about Detroit: Become Human is that the whole premise, the story, the characters, the themes, etc are so compelling and timely even more so now in the mid 2020s than they were in 2018, with the rise of AI and everything... However, the writing just does not do any of it justice. David Cage (regardless of what you think about him personally) really did create something special here, but the execution left a lot of things to be desired. There is just so much wasted potential and it leaves me feeling unsatisfied, like there's an itch I just can't scratch.

I understand that it's a massive and complicated video game with so many options for the player to shape the story (and that's the whole point of the game - that you get to decide the fate of the characters and therefore how the story progresses). However I think that this in addition to the format, the fact that it is a video game, contributes to it's downfall. It sets up limitations that there's no way to avoid. Generally speaking, there just isn't time to fully flesh everything out, especially when it comes to the characters themselves and their motivations. So many little details that would make for a better story are pushed aside and fall victim to the progression of the narrative for the sake of the game itself. But I'd argue that the things which are just glossed over, the things mentioned once and never brought up again are essential to the narrative and would have really brought greater clarification as well as more meaning overall. But there simply isn't the time to do that, not when you're balancing things like action scenes and interactive gameplay that so many are expecting because ultimately it is a game - and a game based on player choices at that. To create a truly fulfilling story, QD and DC would have had to choose only one of the possible outcomes to focus on. And that would undermine the entire concept of the game, that every choice you make matters and can change the outcome.

While I do enjoy D:BH and what it offers, I often find myself getting stuck on the potential it had to do something even more profound than what it has. In a sense, I think DC almost bit off more than he could chew when writing it - and I don't know if he necessarily could have done it better. Perhaps in a different format we could have gotten a piece of media that explored everything in a more in-depth, satisfying, meaningful way. And there are so many opportunities for us fans to do that now: whether it's through fanfiction where people can do more worldbuilding and exploration of themes/characters, or here on tumblr or reddit where we can get really meta about it through fandom discourse.

I hate to close this by quoting fucking Abby Lee Miller from Dance Moms, but it's the only way I'm able to put how I feel about D:BH into one concise statement: "you were good, I'm waiting for you to be great."

#detroit become human #detroit: become human #dbh #sorry if this doesn't make sense it did in my head #i think as people in fandom we often tend to fall in love with the potential of the thing more so than the actual thing #but that is extra true for dbh for me personally

[tankgotstuckinthecircusgate]

i could draw anything but i decided to draw this. carlo and rocco in 1932 aka my headache

#^ this isnt real ofc but its what happening inside their heads (well in carlo's at least) #mfs when their old friend doesn't break under manipulation #“Lift up the receiver I'll make you a believer” punching the wall with fist #rocco was the underboss not eddie can u hear me!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO!!!!!!!!! (capo henry situation in terms of complexity) #no m2 did smth to my brain and now im incapable of writing normal relationship between people #anyway. things that makes sense only to me rn unfortunately: #“AND YET ALAS I WELCOME YOU KNOWING ABOUT YOU” its carlo @ rocco but works both ways i think. RAHHHHHHHHH #YET YOU THINK WE'RE THE SAME RAHHHHHHHHH #youre not who u are to anyone these days im not who i am to anyone no not me at all these days not at all RAHHHHHHHHH #carlo who was afraid of rocco (for a reason) when he started to run the family rahhhhhhhhh #“That son of a bitch!.. I fuckin’ knew it!” <-watch me put a lot more meaning into a phrase that shouldn't make so much sense #2kczech need to pay me for developing rocco's character btw if u even care . and for writing this fucking falcone family backstory #“Холодный и острый осколок гранита; Смерть Голиафа в руке Давида” #<- “A cold and sharp shard of granite; Goliath's death in David's hand” #i've listened to this song too much it became certifed rocco song to me #let's say rocco helped carlo a lot w preparing moretti family for a new don. just bc i don't think it was this simple #“your capo killed your don lets all pretend that its cool and normal and it doesn't matter that he ran the family for 23 years😋😘” #avart #m2 #i wont tag this w fandom tags dear god this shit is so delusional #dear god rocco been a gap and a blank spot in this story for so long but now i genuinely like him #tho i'm still not done with his character yet but there's enough for me to like him #sorry. not normal bout them. not at all . #rocco & carlo

[angevinyaoiz]

Philip II Augustus, or as described in someone's tags, one of the "top 10 most punchable historical figures. Unfortunately. He is also extremely entertaining."

Philip was the first to style himself King of France rather than King of the Franks. he is known for his role in the Third Crusade and tumultuous relationships and manouvers against Henry II, Richard I, and John I of England, eventually resulting in regaining the Angevin Empire's territories in France. Bertran de Born early on derided some of his political and military decisions as being cowardly in some contemporary poems (a "lamb" against Richard's "lion"). However, later writings described him as being "more cunning than a fox," and as one who loved to "provoke discord" amongst men who resisted him. He also seems to have done a lot of things that have been puzzling for some historians, such as

While an notable figure in French history obviously, in my perusals he seems to rarely ever pop up in mainstream recent anglophone media as a major character, but when he does at all it seems like it's to have toxic gay drama with Richard. This is mostly not very historical and based on dated early 20th century scholarship, but has made for some very iconic entertainment that, in spirit at least, seems consistent with the legacy of Being A Dramatic Bitch

#Philip Augustus #Philippe Auguste #Philip II of France #Additional notes: #Most of my reading has been jean flori and Strickland #And flori is. Very funny. Very dramatic even when he is not trying to #He's just constantly like *scratches head* So Philip did XYZ. We don't know why and it doesn't make sense #But he sure did that behavior #Debunked yaoi but th #No respect for monarchs but I will fujofy their toxic traits. Sorry not sorry #12th century #French history #Fanart #Medieval #Capetians #Unrelated but I started drawing him brunette just bc like #Most of the modern art portrayals run with that #And it just feels consistent to me lmao in my brain #He's bald anyway in his later life so it doesn't matter #Bald Philippe representation #My art

[hoperays-song]

Can you explain things you want to happen to Johnny in the next sing movie(or project or if they make a graphic novel) mine is that he makes his own song.

Ooooooo, thank you for the ask!!!! I'm so sorry in advance, I'm gonna ramble here lol. - <3 Gooseless

--------------------------------- So I actually want a few things to happen in the next project (the continuation fic is essentially all of it lol), but I would definitely agree on the original songs front! That's for sure on my list.

One of the main things though, the biggest one actually, is to continue with Johnny's storyline as a queer allegory. We've already faced familial acceptance in the first movie, community acceptance with the second movie (though I have so many issues with how the dance class was handled), and it would be nice to just wrap it up with personal acceptance. And that might seem out of order but it actually isn't in a lot of cases. I know, for me at least, I spent so much time right after coming out defending my place and my identity to the world around me that I never really took the moment to process I could just finally be myself, and that it was ok to exist. I feel like a storyline like that with Johnny would be amazing, as there are numerous ways to go that route, like romantic (please, I want to see Rynny more than anything, PLEASE) or personal (Johnny finally putting out boundaries with his workload).

This would be an awesome storyline to see through either of those lenses, with a romantic arc featuring Johnny and Ryan being able to use a much more obvious way of showing this, especially if Ryan has already reached personal acceptance. Why that is is because throughout his previous storylines, Johnny has a specific support system for each, with familial being the troupe and community being Nooshy, so it would make sense if the love interest in this scenario, Ryan, took on that role this time around. It works really well in this option as it leads to really cute moment possibilities of the characters, particularly Johnny, just letting himself exist and have something for himself. And I will admit that I feel this is the best option for this storyline, as it is pretty blunt and up-front with the coding then, just like Johnny's other storylines, but also allows Johnny to have something for himself (his identity and his relationship) instead of how we see all his developments in the past movies, aka being broadcasted to the world and not really giving the kid any privacy. He deserves something for himself. And I feel like a relationship with Ryan could be that thing.

But like I said, you could work it as personal as well, with Johnny finally putting forward boundaries with Buster due to the workload the man keeps assigning the poor kid. I feel like a good support system here could be Ryan (if they are in an already established relationship) or his dad and uncles as they would have life experience to advise him on the matter. Johnny is heavily overworked throughout both movies and it seems like the expectations for him are really high, so a moment of him just letting himself exist as the ordinary person he is would probably be very therapeutic for him.

I personally wish they would go in the series direction instead of another movie, allowing for more detail to be poured into the characters, and that is kinda the format in which the continuation fic is written, in a way easily translated to a series. However, I have posted an idea for a Sing 3 set after a time jump around Johnny's story that I'll link below. It kinda goes into the previously mentioned wants for a series but having those already happen and mainly talks about ways to get queer rep around hate groups.

So yeah, I really want to see a personal acceptance journey for Johnny, letting the kid see he doesn't have to fight for who he is or his place anymore, he can just be Johnny, however that looks like.

---------------------------------

Here's the Sing 3 idea thing!

#... I did not think I would type that much #I'm so sorry if this doesn't make sense! #im also sorry for rambling this much #being brief is not my strong suit lol #the rynny shipper in me just really wants them to get together #the cultural and media studies major in me really really wants this to finish out the allegory #and you can easily do both!!!!! #sing #sing 2 #sing 3 ideas #sing johnny #sing ryan #sing rynny #rynny #though i should say this now. i will be boycotting anything that has specific actors in it due to their statements about a literal genocide #i dont give a fuck they wont ever get a penny from me #so sing 3 (if/when it happens) is likely going to be ignored by me entirely :) just a heads up #im also a fanfic writer so ignoring canon is what i do most of the time anyway - someone who retconned the entire ending of sing 2 #i also changed so much dance stuff because it just hurt my brain #look i can excuse a lot of inaccuracies in stuff but i draw the line at sports i have done and medical inaccuracies

[sophieswundergarten]

Just in case:

Past Tense: "The ice in the cup melted."

Present Tense: "The ice in the cup melts."

First Person: "I walked across the room."

Third Person: "He walked across the room."

Limited: "He wondered what the kid over there thought."

Omniscient: "He wondered what the kid over there thought. The kid wondered why that boy was staring at him."

#I hope I did those explanations alright #I didn't want to make them too complex #If I did it wrong I'll just delete the poll since you can't edit them :( #But personally I tend to prefer Third Person Omniscient because then you can switch view points. #I don't really care about tense but my brain says Past is more professional and serious for some reason #I guess technically you can have a First Person Omniscient narrator but it'd have to be a pretty specific instance #Not most stories just about humans #I'm sorry if this doesn't make any sense it just popped into my head and I got curious #Me and my little pointless information hoard over here

[julie-su]

Knuckles is my rock when I feel horrible and stupid for being so gullible and trusting and... Naive.

#This is about something mortifying to admit. maybe if you poke me I'll take my hands from my face #It's just something stupid that always causes everybody a pain and it's like I'M SORRY I CAN'T HELP IT THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME #It's like -hears that specific sharp inhale- oh. I did it again #-kicks floor- I am simply very stupid and naive #uggghh it sounds bad when I put it that way. Okay it's about not really understanding things ending and death #RRRGGHH it makes me so frustrated! It's like I have this thing in my head that loops back around to 'that doesn't make sense so it's false' #Then it finally settles in way later. But it's like - I knew the whole time! But I didn't believe it? For no reason. #And no logic can make me complete the conclusion faster. I always go 'no but that's not right' and I feel like a stupid child

[zhuhongs]

i am so painfully american in so many ways that I never even realized,,, like the Pain. Today I went out with my friends mom who doesn’t speak any english and oh my god was I a deer in the headlights all day. I feel soooo bad, also like she refused to let me pay for anything and gave me sooo much food and drove me around all day. I really don’t know how to thank her enough. I tried to give her a gift and she returned it to me without me even noticing... oh my god. ms. huang.. rlly.... TT thank u also I’m so sorry i’m so painfully timid and awkward

#i've never eaten like.. so many kinds of meat bc like.. yk.. americans only really like the "desireable' parts of the meat. so yea.. also i #have like a fear of swallowing bones.. long story. if u were here u were here for it. if u dont know .. its a Story. but yea so i was like. #this is... a painfully awkward meal. also i dropped my chopsticks TWICEEEEE.. pain. also I've never had shirmp with the head on so she #put one on my plate and i was like... uh.... i dont know how to eat this but I just looked out how the ppl around me did it so i got used t #it.. kinda.... god yea. and then she really kept giving me food but I have a small appetite due to the aforementioned fear of bones thing #it was a spell of disordered eating in hs. left me with a damaged throat and a reduced appetite. not body image related but trauma related #etc. etc.. so yea. i felt so bad. I was so full. she bought me so much. im sooo sorry.... but good news is i wont need to buy food at all #tmrw... and then sometimes she'd ask me a question and I'd legit have no clue how to respond. I;m so used to speaking multiple languages #with my classmates and my roommates so if i ever forget smth i can just use a diferrent language to explain and its.. so much harder to #speak only one language than i thought and hhhhh. also sidenote i COMPLETELY understand why my friend is the way she is... like yea no she #IS her mothers daughter hundred percent.... forceful. kind. not afriad to bargain. overall big appetite for life and yea no.. it makes sooo #much sense... i understand it ALL now...also her little brother is so rude.... god i don't like him. i see why she doesn't like him #like id never blame someone for hating their family but yea no i get it #hhhh so yea.. it was rlly fun but also.. a lot. super super grateful tho. #🐌.txt #also i am so tired.. what not getting enough sleep for a week will do to a mf

[hershelwidget]

working on so many projects

tag yourself i'm "swap auuu"

#grim guys night has two scrapped versions already and frankly i'm losong it it's genuinely the hardest to figure out #cause see. the grim GIRLS. they All Get Along (relatively) #dashi lillian and viktor are all Chill with each other. they all chill with lamia (one of them is dating her so like. come on) #they're all Decent with theatre. lillian has a Very Specific connection to him and viktor has something similar but dashi and lamia know #Fuck All about him and his past so they don't ask questions yk #MEANWHILE. lars out here being darwin's MURDERER and natquik being the Weirdest and Most Offputting Old Man to ever Offputting Old Man #natquik is actually chill and a good guy don't get me wrong but it's his vibes. nearly nobody but like. dashi and philliam. actually know i #philliam's like their Boss too and as friendly as he is there's always going to be that Gap in authority that makes it weird at best #not to mention whatever darwin has going on with. everything. none of the grims really respect him like. at all. he's the Outcast #I did at some point put theatre in with them but then I Remembered and he was the ONE PERSON who really made sense other than Dashi #but dashi was obviously occupied with The Girls so here we are. I might head back to Lars. #grim guys night more like grim Holy Shit These Men Are So Uncomfortable With Each Other #my best argument for having lars instead of philliam is that natquik and lars Sort of get along ?? #like they were among the first grims and they were often left alone at the manor and they share common traits and similar linking people #darwin and lars being. victim and murderer is faucijn wild though so i suppose natquik is just. the buffer. the wall. he keeps lars out of #darwin's line of sight or something #this one is the hardest from a logic standpoint ... these three guys would NOT hang out alone but this is the prompt and i can't stray from #it. yeah the art itself is pretty easy !! and fun actually !! but My God. The Canon. #also philliam is kind of out of the question because the whole idea is that everyone is On Break. #being On Break WITH your boss just doesn't. sit right. #yeah in some circumstances it kind of works but in THEIR profession?? they need time AWAY from him i am so sorry

[mythvoiced]

@theimpalpable | the GBEP

If Samuel could will a hole into existence every time he so desperately needs one to just swallow him whole and drag him to the centre of the Earth, a coffin designed perfectly for the kind of messes he's been creating all around this already doomed planet, he'd have turned said doomed planet into the oddest piece of Swiss Cheese ever come into existence.

Which is either a very funny thought or he's bordering on succumbing to the hysterics curling his lips into that odd smile he can't shake off his lips, no matter how inappropriate it feels to wear.

His hands are pressed into his face, eyes freed still and staring at nothing at all, his fingers buried into the beginnings of his hair, messing what is already pretty messy on its own.

This is a nightmare. He hardly has the mental capacity necessary to recognize the possible and very likely implications and ramifications of the creatures he set out into the world, the slow march of decay swaggering about along the bottom of the ocean; being sat directly next to the direct consequences of his actions isn't any easier to stomach as a result, in fact, he's pretty certain that his desiring this to be a dream is teetering dangerously close to him starting to convince himself it is a dream.

Which, of course, would be violently useful.

A psychotic break in the middle of a bar next to a guy who's life he's ruining.

He groans, hands moving to slide over his face, rub into his eyes until he sees stars and begs them to come down upon him like vengeful angels and strike him off the face of the planet. Maybe that would do it. Maybe his death would kill everything he's created along with him, kind of like... killing the sire of a vampire...

"The Sazerac, please," Samuel manages to interject pathetically, which he assumes is not the tone of voice bartenders prefer out of their clients in terms of who they decide to serve and who they'd rather see out of their establishment in the next few 'immediately please'. Samuel has never been refused service before, never thrown enough back to give any barkeep reason to, never crumbled in public in a way obvious enough that it leaves any impression.

But, then again, he's also never half-assed a plot outline and have it lead to meeting the guy said plot outline had forced into itself, perhaps in a weird attempt on the universe's part to fix what he can't, to finally be the author he should be.

Oh, great, an existential crisis on top of the 'supernatural' crisis.

Samuel looks up when the barkeep returns with a glass and doesn't even have the energy to pretend he's surprised when it turns out to be water. He sighs, curses his existence with the exhausted resignation of someone who's given up on trusting in self-curses, and grabs the glass.

He manages a wry smile, charming and handsome, that the stranger is, which is perhaps part of the reason he'd fit so fucking well into the kind of story Samuel had attempted to emulate. Clichés upon clichés, all he'd managed to scratch together, who doesn't love a good explorer story and a Nathan Drake to charm anyone who'd swoon at the easy smile and easy wit?

If anything, Samuel is slowly becoming self-deprecatingly surprised he hadn't realized the moment the stranger had turned his head his way, that this is who he'd been looking for.

He'd tried to find something new to add, something fresh to add to the genre, something to stand out with, and that's precisely while it's now half-deceased and half-abandoned somewhere in a pile of notes with stories just like it.

He hadn't come up with anything that would have made it worth reading above others just like it.

"No, I... I don't think you'll die," Samuel finds himself uttering back, an open-mouthed drag of his mouth to one side to put emphasis on the word 'die', all while he unconsciously peeks over the stranger's arm to watch his sketch unfold. Oh. He can draw, too, he muses, subconsciously adjusting the glasses he sees reflected on the paper.

Charming, handsome, creative, extroverted, makes easy conversations and commands a scenario without ever making Samuel feel like he's backed into a corner by a personality much louder than his own. A guy, friendly, but not overly so.

Samuel has no idea if the plot chose him because who wouldn't fancy a heartthrob protagonist like that - which is honestly just embarrassing to admit - or because if Samuel could pay money to have any of those qualities...

The usual. Is he hot or do I just really, really wish I were him?

Samuel takes a big sip of his water.

He's loosing his goddamn mind.

He's hoping he won't die. He had briefly considered... perhaps a good way to stand out would be to... just...

He slams his hand onto the stranger's arm, eyes blown wide in a frantic panic to fix something he can't fix and prevent something not even happening yet. "Can I have your number?"

He gives himself a few seconds of sirens blaring in his ears before he connects the dots of how he sounds and recoils, only to lurch forward again, an odd dissonance of pulling away, but not appearing... what? Exactly? Damn the bartender for refusing him that drink.

"Not- not like that, wait- uhm, I'm Samuel, hi, nice to meet you, do you think we could...? As in, I would like to help. I think I might be able to- I think you might need my help- this will sound ridiculous, do--?"

He closes his eyes, counts to ten, hates himself a little more, opens them again with an exhale.

"I think I'm partly or mostly to blame for your situation but the reason why I believe that will make me sound insane. But I... need you to believe me and I think... listen, can we talk somewhere else? Maybe...? Or... some other time? Or...?"

#theimpalpable #the samuel;author #HOLY FUCK ALEX THIS IS SUPER SILLY BUT--- I NEED TO MENTION IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND THIS #I DID IT-- I FINALLY MANAGED TO RECOVER ENOUGH MUSE FOR SAMUEL TO FEEL LIKE I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING WITH HIM #SO I'M?? SORRY IF HE DOESN'T SOUND A LOT LIKE PREVIOUS REPLIES? #I THINK I'M... LETTING LOOSE ENOUGH TO UNCOVER A BETTER CHARACTERIZATION SO YES-- #DKSLGJDFLKGFDKLJFG JUST-- can't wait to see Félix flaunting his new face >:333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333 #NOT TO SPOIL THE DASH BUT!!!!!!!1 THAT'S MY GUY RIGHT THERE I LOVE HIM SO #SO YES HI FDKLHGJLKFDGL STILL IN LOVE WITH THIS PLOT AND-- I HOPE THIS REPLY IS OKAY? #i tried to just dip into an authentic thought process for Samuel that's why his head is all over the place #also had to sneak in Félix being yes charming in fact VERY MUCH SO #i'm just such a huge fan of him I HOPE IT'S ALL RIGHT THOUGH? IF SAMUEL THINKS HE'S A LIL HOT? #he's not INTO him like that necessarily but he's attracted to Men and NOT BLIND i just felt it more realistic if he acknowledged that-- #JUST BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS A LIL WORRIED BECAUSE IT FEELS LIKE IMMEDIATELY TRYING TO START SOMETHING? #BECAUSE I KNOW Félix is straight i'm most DEFINITELY not starting anything #SO DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? LET ME KNOW IF YOU'D RATHER DELETE IT? #i also wanted to add it because i wanted to bully Samuel a bit more by adding a queer crisis on top of it #the good ol' 'am i attracted to them or do i want to BE them' Timeless Classic #SO YES LET ME KNOW I CAN SCRAP IT SOOOO FAST ♥♥♥ LOVE YOU LOADSA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #also the 'a) i see you again and b) i don't die in the process' is making me chew on pillows i just love that line so much i love Félix so #;queue