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ineffably-human · 8 months

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We're going to scream about Nandermo all week, but right now I need to talk about Baron Afanas. Because the Baron's arc, so to speak, always felt like a big part of the series DNA for me - and oh fuck did this episode deliver on why.

I think we can agree: in the show, vampire society is fucked up, right?

Vampires on their own have plenty to deal with that can make them crazy. They have to live by killing. They lose everyone from their old lives. They have to find new reasons to keep going on, forever, so shit can get decadent really fast.

But holy shit, what that's turned into in vampire society? Where you actively put cruelty over mercy, and violence over solving your problems? Death cults and scam artists roam free, but if someone has depression the best thing to do is ignore them. Someone can get their mind wiped or be locked up for centuries, and that's just what you do to your species.

So: the Baron's arrival is the first conflict of the whole show. The joke is about an ancient powerful creature of pants-shitting terror, vs three lesser vampires who just want to live their lives and not get murdered for being too lazy to conquer humanity. There's a lot of talk about how to please him: do you keep to the old ways, or pick up some new traditions? Decorate with flayed skin, or with glitter? And the Baron says: who cares, you're all soft and useless. All that matters is getting more control over this world, until people are cattle and we have no reason to hide anymore.

But later he confesses: that shit stopped mattering ages ago. He's not even real nobility, he's literally impotent, and he talks about doing horrible things because he doesn't know what else to say. He's angry and half-crazy from boredom. And admitting that, owning those feelings, means suddenly he has three new friends and a whole new world of things to enjoy.

There's the Baron the rest of the vampire world knows, but for one night we see the ancient, unknowable terror was just a guy. Maybe he's always been just some guy.

That fun puts him in a vulnerable position, and he's killed by the most unwitting vampire slayer in fiction. But Baron Afanas is changed. He sucks dirt for a year and still comes out of it with a new lightness and joy to him. He saves the Sire, another ancient terrifying monster everyone was eager to kill or send away. They adopt the hellhound. They get cozy and give advice. They make popsicle stick houses and go on walks. They live.

And that seemed like the end of the story until last night - when the Baron suddenly felt like the butt of a joke everyone knew but him. Spurred on by someone else who feels lonely and ignored, the Baron felt vulnerable. And he snapped back to how he lived for centuries.

'What the hell are you all doing, enjoying yourselves? We're supposed to be unhappy. We're supposed to live centuries of unhappiness, bringing pain to everyone in our path, and we're definitely not supposed to cheer up our friend who's sad.'

Nobody liked the Baron before Guillermo killed him, not even other powerful vampires we meet; they saw the Baron as a crazy far beyond their own crazy. But this is also how vampire society values you. It's how they measure Nandor's worth when they think he's dead, too: how old and powerful you are, how much you've been able to conquer and kill.

Vampire pods are both cliquish and aren't expected to last in the first place. If someone dies, you literally paint them out of your lives and forget. Everything we see discourages feelings, sincerity, or even basic companionship. The only way to earn respect is to be cruel. The more cruel you are, the more powerful you are. The more powerful you are, the more feared you are - the lonelier you are, the crazier you are. It's practically designed to create the Baron, or worse.

But new vampires don't behave that way. And the vampires we follow in the show don't behave that way - because they have each other, because they've been encouraged to have each other, often by Guillermo. (Holy shit, Nadja saying maybe she'd be fine dying, and Nandor immediately asking if she's okay? Nothing changes in this house, except everything does. They're not going to almost lose one of their own ever again.)

The vampires in the heart of vampire culture never seem happy to be like this. It doesn't have to be like this.

The Baron doesn't become a tyrannical monster for long. Because he never actually was one - and because he spends two evenings and a fireball to the face, watching Nandor and Nadja fight for Guillermo. Watching them plead and cling and defy, seeing Guillermo's earnest feelings in spite of his bloodline and the mistakes he's made. Seeing Nandor's perfect trust, and then his grief, the way he insists that Guillermo was never 'just' anything. The Baron can't find real fulfillment in hurting someone (because that ship sailed ages ago). He can't deride them for caring, because he's cared for a long time now.

And when the Baron admits that's who he is, when he says it out loud, he only gains more in his life. He finds new depth in the happiness he'd felt for a while now, because he's admitted and allowed himself to be happy. And now he has the children he's always wanted. Living together, the Baron and the Sire are still ancient and powerful - and they're also family, finding real joy together in a world that was ready to dispose of them.

"I suppose with the right company, it can be beautiful, this eternal existence."

There's an inherent selfishness to being a vampire, taking from someone else in order to live. But there doesn't have to be inherent cruelty, or lack of love.

They're all ready to admit they care. The Staten vampires have all cared for Guillermo or each other in their own ways this season. And Guillermo doesn't lack for flaws, but loving his monster family has never been one of them. (When he and Nandor work their shit out, they're gonna be insufferable.)

Now they just have to let the Guide in. Because she's absolutely starved for love, and vampires get pretty fucked up when they're on their own.

#fandom: wwdits #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #i am a meta gremlin #baron afanas #tl;dr i am a sucker for choosing love #especially when the world around you says it's stupid or you're not allowed #but love was always in you so it happens anyway

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annabelle--cane · 7 months

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I guess the thing that makes me not so fond of Jon's addiction allegory is that it's only coherent to a certain extent? Like I think people sometimes forget that he's actively violating these people

anon, through no fault of your own you have accidentally hit upon my sleeper agent trigger phrase. I have layers of answers to this.

so first off, yeah, it's not a 1:1 direct metaphor, it's a soupy dream logic fantasy plot device with flavors of a lot of different things. there's quite a lot of addiction in there, there's some abuse of power, there's some cyclical nature of trauma, there's a dash of disability, there's a few notes of gendered violence, there's a good bit of just. violence violence and being kind of a motherfucker because goddammit it feels good to be an active agent about something in your life, even if it's just choosing to be a worse version of yourself than you strictly need to be. a lot of tma's worldbuilding is very allegorical, but apart from aspects of individual statements nothing really matches up quite 1:1 with a real world counterpart, and if more things did then it probably wouldn't be a fantasy show anymore.

secondly. okay to contextualize this answer a little bit I have a kind of hypothetical video essay project about vampirism and addiction that I like to spend a few hours thinking about every so often but am almost certainly never going to make because the full research burden required is a lot higher than I actually have the time to properly do. but because of that I've spent a lot of time sorting through why framing vampires as addicts really works for me in a way that it doesn't seem to for everyone, and I think a lot of my thoughts on that also apply to jon. there's going to be a bit of a detour here before we get back to talking about tma, but we'll get there, I prommy.

I've seen a lot of people take issue with various paranormal addiction allegories because, a lot of the time, the act that is meant to metaphorically represent the act of use itself is something that is directly and inherently harmful to others, e.g. drinking human blood, handing over power to your hedonistic Evil alter ego, holding the cursed amulet and going crazy going stupid, slurping trauma out of the head of some guy you ran into on a boat to norway, etc., and yeah, I do get that. substance use is not inherently harmful like that to anyone except sometimes the user themself, and addicts are not inherently fucked up and destructive people; those are dangerous stereotypes that often lead to the demonizing of a whole group of sick people.

here's the thing for me, though: those are definitely truths I want explored and represented when it comes to portrayals of non-allegorical actual addicts, but fantasy fiction isn't for showing the world as it is, it's for showing a subjective fun house mirror version of reality where certain aspects are minimized and magnified depending on how it feels to live through it. and yes, absolutely in real life drug use is not an inherently evil act and it does not make you an inherently evil person, but... doesn't it kind of feel like that? sort of? absolutely no one is living their best life nor on their best behavior while experiencing any kind of major mental illness episode, and when it comes to addiction you've got a very clear tangible symbol of when The Episode is happening that it feels like you have much more control over than when it comes to other illnesses. it's also a thing where people are a lot more likely to be openly angry and distrustful of you if they find out it's happening. so you mix together the ideas of "I know I get worse as a result of doing this one specific thing" + "I act less like myself when I'm using, it rearranges my priorities and I care less about hurting people because that's what happens when you're experiencing The Horrors" + "society at large/people directly around me are pretty quick to say that doing this is evil," and you get the subjective emotional result of "I hurt people by using and it makes me monstrous." I tend to respond to those kinds of paranormal allegories like they're just cutting out the middle man of those subjective fears. "using makes me monstrous" -> "using is monstrous."

anyway. jon archivist.

don't get me wrong, I totally understand if this aspect of metaphor doesn't gel for some people and they only like taking it exactly as far as the text explicitly makes them, but I really get a lot out of reading jon's connection to the fears as addiction precisely because he does genuinely awful things to people as a result of it. he's a person in a very bad physical and mental place with little to no support who is constantly being told by both allies and enemies that he's already a monster just by being alive, and he copes with that by secretly falling further and further into an compulsive act of consumption that skews his priorities and makes him care less about hurting people because at least sometimes getting to be the cause of pain makes him feel a little bit less powerless when he has to be the subject of pain the rest of the time. then he's found out and is made to stop, and he has to grapple not just with the physical toll of withdrawal but with knowing there is a not insignificant part of him that will excuse any act of malice if he knows he'll feel better afterwards.

the end of tma is very explicit in the fact that the rules of its world are shaped by the subjective worst fears of those who live in it, it's "an exercise in unreliably reality" as jonny sims put it once, and I think that principle extends backwards in some ways to apply to the rest of the show. I don't think the fact that there are only entities of fear and not hope or love is meant to be a full commentary on the total nature of the real world, it's a reflection of what fear and suffering can make the world feel like. eric and melanie both go to really harsh extremes to extricate themselves from the fears and live peaceful lives, and in both cases something happens that foils their plans (getting murdered + the apocalypse, respectively), but I don't think the intended message is to say that is definitively how real life works, they are metaphors for the limits of individual agency in larger systems and represent two types of worst-case-scenarios. similarly, I don't think reading jon as an addict implies that addiction inherently involves violence or that the reactions of those around him were completely unjustified, it's just a subjective exploration of the kinds of fears that can come with addiction dialed up to 100.

#also to be clear after the first paragraph I'm using 'you' in a general sense not directly to You The Anon Who Sent This #I'm not trying to insinuate anything about whether You The Anon Who Sent This does or doesn't have any experience w substance use #tma #answered #anons

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bigfatbimbo · 2 months

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hi again! I have many headcanons stored inside my brain right now, so I’ve got some headcanons for Vox right now!

May not be completely canon but I’ll try my best to get Vox as canon as possible and not OOC! (I have a lot more sir pentious hcs though if you’re willing to hear..)

Also, I apologize if my English isn’t great, or if my grammar is off, orrrr.. whatever. I natively speak Armenian, so, fun fact I guess. Sometimes I struggle with English but I hope this is good enough!

Vox; NSFW

Vox 100% only shows his submissive nature around people whom he trusts most, specifically you. He, of course, retaliates and makes smartass remarks whenever he’s subbing, but that’s to be expected from a man that’s just born to be a brat.

He battles with Valentino for dominance which, to my knowledge, is canon. I feel like it definitely takes way too long for them to decide who will be the sub because neither of them want to give up the title of the dom. But when you come along, it’s obvious who the dom will be. (Well, at least to you and Vox, since he obviously gets humiliated if everyone else knows that he likes getting fucked by you.)

He wouldn’t immediately falter. He retaliates and retaliates and retaliates. But he does eventually give into your demands and becomes a good boy.

But even if he is being a good boy, I think it would be fun to play around with him and degrade him no matter how good he’s doing. Of course throw some random praises into the mix, but I just wanna degrade him so bad. (Maybe I just like being mean to fictional men all the time. Dunno.)

Call him a slut, tell him he’s pathetic, whatever you want to say. He’ll be either 1: retaliating, or 2: whimpering and not even being able to respond since he’s probably too fucked out of his mind to do so.

But if you decide to be nice with him and praise him, he’ll just end up sobbing. Don’t know why, but he will. He’ll be sobbing while calling you mommy as you’re pegging him or riding him or whatever you wish to do.

Now, onto some more juicy stuff. I feel like he cums really fast. Especially when he’s got that boycunt. One feather light touch and he is DONE FOR. Eat him out and he will be squirting almost immediately because he just loves how your tongue feels inside of him.

ALSO, he’s definitely the smug ass type to be sending you pics whenever he’s masturbating. He probably has a smug grin when he’s sending you a picture of him playing with his pussy. Or he’ll even send videos, where he’s moaning and begging for you.

To be fair, he would still do this when he has his cock, no doubt. He would be jerking himself off while fucking himself with a dildo and begging for you. But I feel like he gets 100x more needy whenever he switches his parts out for a pussy.

It’s just a weird light switch that goes off in his brain. Like, wow, he has a pussy. Now he needs you to fuck his wet cunt until he sobs. Don’t make me explain I just know it happens somehow

When he doesn’t have his cunt however, he LOVES being pegged. In my opinion he’s a pegging enthusiast. Get the strap out and he will get so damn desperate for the dildo attached to it.

He gets super whiney when you’re using pegging as a punishment for him. You can do it really fast and rough because he’s been a brat, and make it so that he probably won’t be able to walk for the next, what, 3 days? (Overexaggeration.. but still.)

OR you could do it AGONIZINGLY slow as a punishment. Go as slow as possible while fucking into him with your plastic dick while he begs for you to speed up, but you just keep going at the slowest pace you can. He needs to get put into his place.

I feel like he would immediately get horny from hugs from behind. Don’t know why, but whenever you walk up to him from behind and put your arms around his waist while you may be whispering something to him, it feels to intimate to him and he either whimpers or try to ward you off.. although not really, since he’s just being a brat. He wants you to keep holding him forever.

He probably likes rough sex most of the time. But if he’s stressed or tired, he wants super fluffy sex where you’re taking care of him and making sure to be as soothing as possible. Gently fuck into him with your strap while he holds onto your shoulders since he’s on his back. Make him feel like he’s getting fucked into the clouds but in the most fluffiest of ways. And make sure to give him the best aftercare.

About the rough sex thing, however, BE ROUGH. He doesn’t want it TOO rough, since he’s sensitive. But fuck him into absolute oblivion until he can’t even remember his own name. Instead, the only thing clouding his mind is you, you, you. Make him cum over and over again while having no plan on stopping until he’s too overstimulated to go on.

Or you can edge him until he’s obedient enough for you. Put a cock ring on his cock and make sure he cannot cum while you thrust your strap into him. He needs consequences, he needs to get karma, for being such a brat.

Onto aftercare: GIVE HIM SOOTHING AFTERCARE. Make sure to give him plenty of cuddles and kisses from underneath the fluffiest blue (it HAS TO BE SPECIFICALLY BLUE) blanket you can find. Give him snacks and watch a movie with him. If it’s messy, then of course clean up beforehand.

But if either of you are too tired for either of those things, then he’s completely fine with cuddling you to sleep while having soft dreams of you, and only you.

Had to make sure to end a bit fluffy haha

Sorry if this is bad, or if you have already said some of these things before. Perhaps we share a braincell or perhaps I just agree with a lot of the things you say. Who knows?

i’m literally so spent and borderline delirious but this is the best thing i’ve received all day oh my god. lowkey improved my mood so much.

i won’t say much because you did literally amazing work and covered all the bases, but the idea of him with a smug smile sending videos of him fingering himself… yeah. yeah i dig it.

#dom reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel smut #vox x reader #inbox open #sub vox

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estro-gem · 6 months

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Jax x Ragatha: The snake and the water spring

The Amazing Digital Circus AU: Oasis.

Author's note: I found this show by chance and I took a great liking to it! So now I did a thing, instead of studying for upcoming exams, because I love making things difficult for myself, apparently.

I have no idea what the fandom is like, but I'm playing it safe just to be... well... safe. I just loved the concept of this show so much that I couldn't help but be inspired by it! It got me thinking and I let it all out in this... thing.

I want to write more one-shot fics about the other characters and how they fit into this au too, but I don't know when I'll be able to.

WARNING! None of these characters are mine and everything mentioned and described is purely made-up fiction; inspired by works that are not my own. Nothing should be considered canon or taken seriously - we are all here to have some harmless fun! No age restrictions. I think this might be appropriate for all ages...?

Please show some love and support for Gooseworx; the creator of The Amazing Digital Circus!

I definitely butchered Gooseworx's characters by adding unnecessary 'relationship dynamics' and deviating from their original personalities. I promise that the actual show and characters are so much better than they are in my false portrayal of them.

SUMMARY:

A fanmade take on the events following Pomni's arrival and after the crew had dinner together. This is focused on Jax's point of view, but still written in the third person.

Jax confronts Ragatha after the pilot episode's 'dinner' and does his best to comfort her in a way that works for them. That's it.

Please enjoy!

THE SNAKE AND THE WATER SPRING

Jax was a desert snake.

Nothing but a cold-blooded pest that lived to find his next meal.

When one is left to die under the scorching sun, you can’t stomp on the sun for creating a desert, but you could stomp on the desert snake if it added to the pain of surviving in said desert. The Digital Realm was nothing but a desert sun – a cage with no exit and an evil with no target.

It was no secret why so many had lost their minds here.

Jax took on the role of being the snake. It was never announced or planned, but it was deemed necessary by all who came to know the realm. The inhabitants of The Amazing Digital Circus craved any sense of control; something they could hold accountable for their torment – something they could punish. A menace, parasite.

Evil with a target: Jax.

It was fun to act out while everybody went about their lives. He could unapologetically be the worst being known to man and thrive on the rage and hatred of all he had affected. If they hated him, he was fulfilling his role perfectly… and that meant they could stay sane and do their parts as he did his. Less people would be lost to insanity… and the group would grow stronger.

Everyone had a role in their system – an oasis was established, with Ragatha as the heart of the oasis; their very own water spring.

But when a new invading creature bursts into the oasis with no knowledge of this system, their system would be doomed. Pomni happened to be that invader. Everyone could collectively, yet silently agree that she was acting by her own careless devices since she arrived a few hours ago. She greedily soaked up their water source and left it barren, dry, and suffering.

Granted, Pomni didn’t know how their oasis worked, but it didn’t change the fact that she disrupted everything by showing up. She would have to catch on quickly and prove herself useful, before anyone else loses their minds.

They lost one of their own already… and they almost lost their beloved Ragatha; Jax’s equal and opposite.

Their precious water source.

Snakes offered venom, while water springs offered hope of life. They all desperately needed Ragatha to survive. While most would assume her to be fine after being fixed by Caine, Jax knew better than that. He saw her reluctantly stand aside Pomni to support her – beautifully acting within her role as she always would, but it was clear that Pomni still didn’t understand how scarce the water was by then. Rags was spread thin enough by handling the extra stress and enduring the continuous pain of being corrupted by the abstraction, but that didn’t stop Pomni from practically having a mental breakdown at the dinner table.

Jax saw that coming from a mile away. Thank goodness he silently took the open seat next to Pomni, silent in his insistence that the ragdoll should keep her distance for the time being. He’d give anything to destroy the little jester for abusing his doll. Ragatha was acting perfectly normal at the time – her masked smile perfectly set on her face – until it was time for them all to retire to their respective bedrooms.

Jax wished that he would’ve just dragged her after him when he booked it from the abstraction earlier today. Pomni would have been the perfect distraction for them to escape and get Caine.

He stood at Ragatha’s door after dinner.

Jax made a point to ring the doorbell this time. Usually, he’d just pluck out a key and saunter in like he owns the place, but with what happened today, he’d make an exception. Everyone has their limit – and someone has already reached their limit today. They couldn’t risk losing another one. Especially not Raggs. They all really needed her.

When she didn’t open, he tried the bell again. Nothing.

Well, time for the key, then.

He shoved his hand down his front pocket and fished out the doll’s room key. The bunny didn’t waste time opening the door. He wanted to see what state the girl was in, despite dreading the possibility of finding an abstracted amalgamation on the other side.

Silence.

Not even a creak was heard from the hallway. The room was lit up as it usually was, so that was a good sign, at least. Jax couldn’t see an obvious black body of eyes – another win. But where was Ragatha? He did see her walk into her room, so she had to be here.

He walked around, keeping his cool, casual composure fixed, despite no one being around. It was effortless at this point. It became a way for him to focus on what he could control in this crazy digital prison; himself.

He couldn’t, however, control his ability to spot a blasted ragdoll, it would seem. He scanned the room again, until his eyes fell on her ¾ bed. Could she-?

The bunny rolled his eyes at himself as he lowered himself onto his knees – maybe he could convince himself that he was not phased by the situation. Bending down, he peered beneath the bed frame.

Jax sighed in exasperation. Or was it relief? Both?

Ragatha was in the state she was in before retiring to her room. No gliching, no extra eyes.

Just Raggs.

She didn’t look good, though. The doll was curled up beneath her bed and blindly staring ahead of her. It didn’t look like she was breathing – not that they needed to anyway, but it was uncanny to see Rags like this. She was their voice of reason. She was a water spring in this desert.

If she dried up, their desert would be doomed.

Jax silently stood up and walked back to the open door again. No need to make a fuss over this. He took hold of the door handle and shut it from the inside. Key in hand, he locked the door and nodded to himself. Ragatha needed a raincloud… and he’d have to fill that role now. It’s the least he could do after leaving her to fend for herself when they found the abstraction today.

Why didn’t she run with him? Why did think she could fix someone whose mind was broken beyond repair? Why didn’t she just leave the rookie as bait?

Because that just wasn’t her role, was it?

If it weren’t for her nature – her role – none of them would have made it this far. It dawned on Jax, once again, how close they were to losing their beloved doll. How close they were to being stuck with an invader who knew nothing about what it took to survive in this hell hole.

Enough.

Back to the bed, crouched down and silent Jax positioned himself to lay down and simply look over the red head from a relative distance. There was enough space for the doll to crawl out of hiding without having to touch him. The bunny still hadn’t said a word. It’d be stupid to talk, and he didn’t feel like making the effort. He just wanted things back to normal again – well… as normal as it could have been.

Now Kaufmo is gone, a new creature was invading their home, tearing it up from the roots and tipping the delicate scales of the balance they worked very hard on creating. All because of a lunatic ringmaster having the bright idea of creating a fake exit-door. Someone better get that jester on a tight leash to get her to fall in line, like the rest of them were forced to.

He knew he, for one, wouldn’t mind roughing her up a bit. It was his specialty – his role. The parasite. The menace. The instigator.

Evil with an actual target.

The sound of shifting and movement had Jax blink out of his own head. Ragatha was slowly and dumbly making her way out from under her bed. Her eyes were still fogged over and her face still eerily blank, but at least she came out of hiding out of her own will. In a matter of seconds, the doll was out from her hiding place and settled on the floor beside Jax. She was staring him in the eyes now, waiting for the bunny, silently pleading.

Jax hadn’t had his aloof-douchebag persona engaged since he locked Ragatha’s door. She didn’t need a menace now – she needed to be grounded; revitalized. She needed a dark raincloud to fill up the water spring they all needed.

He didn’t look forward to what needed to be done, but he wouldn’t allow anyone else to do it.

He moved to stand up and held out a hand to help her up. He took note of the way her hand was shaking when she took his and gently guided her to the bed. The red head was the first to sit, then moved to lay down on her back and numbly stare at the ceiling. With a deep breath, Jax gathered himself mentally and cautiously crept onto the bed and positioned himself to briefly hover over her, before lowering his full weight onto Ragatha.

He had his head in the crook of her neck, on the left shoulder with his ears folding back to floppily droop to his upper back… with his left hand resting on the opposite shoulder. His body, although slim, enveloped hers and caused her to sink slightly into the mattress. His legs just loosely laid over and aside the ragdoll’s. It was more important to have his weight resting on her torso anyway.

For a long moment, they just motionlessly laid on the bed like this. To an outsider, it would look like they fell asleep atop each other or simply cuddled together very closely.

An outsider wouldn’t see that Jax was focused on the slow process of Ragatha’s body relaxing under his weight and her breathing slowing to a regular rhythm. An outsider wouldn’t have known that this was hardly the first time they’d done this – how long it took Jax to learn that this make-shift deep-pressure therapy was the most effective grounding technique for Ragatha to collect herself again.

They wouldn’t understand that Jax didn’t do this out of wanting to, but rather out of necessity.

Jax didn’t like to be touched. If anything, he was very capable of merely tolerating it. Everyone in the circus knew that he was touch-averse; some even used that as leverage to mess with him if the situation called for it. It was a necessity that he endured to keep his doll sane – to keep anyone of importance here in the circus, sane. Their whole lives revolved around mental strength. It was all just a matter of staying sane.

The laid there for what felt like a lifetime.

Slight shifting beside Jax alerted him that the doll was moving her arms – previously stiffly pinned to her sides. This was good, she felt comfortable enough to move around now!

Her left hand gently snaked up to the bunny’s head and slowly, softly petted his ears in a longitude motion. Her right hand wrapped loosely around his middle-to-lower back – motionless. This was bad, Jax did not like being touched like that!

While he was fine with the rhythmic touches of Ragatha’s left hand, he despised the idle position of the right hand resting on his back. He couldn’t prevent himself from tensing up in discomfort.

Bad touch, bad touch, bad-

This caused the ragdoll to tense up and rip her hands off him as if he burned her.

Oh no you don’t! We are not starting all over again.

He slowly pulls away and propped up unto his elbows, hearing Ragatha’s breathing pick up as she presumably spirals into her own thoughts on how he was going to leave her like this. Jax cast down a disapproving look. He broke his gaze to unceremoniously take her right hand – now clutched close to her chest – and intertwined their fingers, before resting his head on her left shoulder once again. He close eyes as he use his free hand to put her left hand on his head again, waiting for her to resume her petting.

Good touch; this was a good touch. Please understand.

Thankfully, Ragatha relaxed… and continued her previous slow, rhythmic motions. Slowly, Jax felt her relax once again and he indulged into her need for touch by stroking his thumb over hers occasionally.

Soon they fell into a rhythm; Ragatha would pet Jax’s ears 3 times, then it was his turn to stroke his thumb over hers. Then they would repeat the routine. This also helped Jax cope with the touching; the routine. The rhythm.

It felt like hours ticked by as the two just practiced their little unspoken routine. Jax grew used to it after a while, almost forgetting that his new mattress was now a sentient ragdoll and completely tuned into their rhythm of touches.

Pet… pet… pet… thumb. Pet… pet… pet… thumb.

Jax didn’t like touch, but he loved routine.

The doll and the bunny’s time together, once nothing but grounding techniques, grew to become an intimate exchange of touches and caresses – all wrapped in a routine, like a dance. Jax felt warm and fuzzy inside; for once he basked in the moment of enjoying his dolly. He lazily wondered if Ragatha felt the same. He shifted his head to look at her.

The doll looked down to meet his eyes when she felt him move. He could swear that she looked at peace, basking in the bliss of their closeness. For some reason, she looked like an angel. They all saw her as their angel. Had he successfully pinned a heavenly body beneath him?

Her gentle, longing gaze made a kaleidoscope of butterflies erupt from his core.

This wasn’t the first time this feeling invaded his being when they did this – as rare as these moments were. He wasn’t sure when he started experiencing such feelings during these rare encounters, but as months crawled by, he felt drawn to his dolly more and more. Based on how she looked at him, he could only assume that she felt it too.

Something so foreign, yet so familiar.

He didn’t fail to spot the warmth rushing to her cheeks when their eyes met. She looked so ethereal beneath him, especially when her breathing picked up under his firm gaze. Her lips were parted, and her eyes were lidded. This time, it wasn’t fear or overstimulation. It was anticipation. It was desire.

Jax internally flinched at the tingly sensation when he smoothly burrowed his face into Ragatha’s neck. She shivered at the breath he let out against her skin. He could tolerate the touching a little longer, as long as he could see her crumble again. He wanted to see her walls crumble again.

“Jax- ”

Oh… he had to hear her again. More clearly, next time. This was torture, but she made him into her own personal masochist. His skin crawled at the sensation of her skin shivering against him, but he needed more. He could take it. Just a little longer – he just had to stand these sensations a little longer. He looked at her again.

Ragatha was reverting to a helpless puddle. The doll’s arms were gripping at the covers beneath her, successfully eliminating the bother of excessive contact that he despised. Jax didn’t know if she did it with that intension or without thinking, but either way, he was thankful. He really wanted more.

Why couldn’t he just be normal?

He lifted onto his elbows again and – dare one say – lovingly looked at her face. She could only peek back at him, breathing slightly faster than usual. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her shaky hand rise from the covers and hover next to his cheek, while her eyes pleaded for his mercy. He hesitated but bit the bullet to comply; leaning into her touch while desperately trying to ignore the odd tingles. Jax convinced himself to kiss her wrist and drowned himself in the pleasure of hearing her softly call his name.

He only heard it because he was listening so closely for it.

Yes.

DING DONG

In a flash, Jax braced himself up into a crouch and slammed his foot down with a mighty THUMP upon hearing Ragatha startle into a fit when the doorbell chimed. His hair on his back stood on end and his claws ripped through his gloves, leaving gouges in the covers beside the doll’s head.

His precious doll was disturbed again!

He heard her soft cry of fear and his blood boiled with a thirst for vengeance. Only he can make her cry out. He’ll skin the soul that dared to-

“Ragatha…? Can we talk?”

That DAMN jester!

“Jax?” a quiet voice trembled in his ear from beneath him. Jax stopped glaring at the door to softly glance down and see what his little doll wanted.

“Don’t…” Raggs sounded like she was begging while being held at gunpoint, whispering despite their rooms being enchanted to not hear anything from the outside when the door is shut.

Jax wouldn’t dare let that thing inside. Raggs was upset enough as it is.

“Look, I know it probably wouldn’t make a difference…” Pomni’s voice came from the other side door again, “…but I’m so sorry for running off… Again… I saw that exit and I had to see if it was real. No one else believed me and I started to think that I was losing my mind. You understand that, right?”

Jax placed both his hands down on the mattress, blocking the doll’s view of the door as if it could block the sound of the voice from reaching the Raggs’s ears, still hovering over her. He knew that his dolly didn’t want to hear anything the harlequin had to say now – he had half the mind to get up and bash the newbie’s head in.

“I hope we can talk about this some time. You are probably tired after such a long, crazy day.” Pomni’s voice died down near the end, “It feels like you’re the only good person here.”

She really is, but she’s too good for you. Selfish leech.

Jax looks down to the girl, still stiff as a board beneath him. Her eye was shiny with the swell of tears. He melted at the sight – anger simmering down. She was just a sweet little rag dolly, she didn’t deserve any of this, but oh, he was so happy to see Ragatha finally emote something again. She was OK again. Their water source was filled once again, now threatening to spill over. He’d happily welcome the flood.

He needed her.

The sound of fading footsteps causes Jax to rip his eyes to the direction of the door. His hearing was better than the dolls, probably thanks to being a rabbit.

Good riddance.

Ragatha seemed to relax at the sight of Jax deflating his stance, reading that Pomni probably left her door. She hesitantly reached up to cup Jax’s cheek. Jax followed her hand’s motion and scoffed, cringing at the invasion. He’s had enough touching for a week. It sucked to leave his doll so soon after being distressed again, but he couldn’t bring himself stand any more of this. He quickly got up and smoothed out his clothes, but not without missing the flash of hurt in the doll’s eyes. He felt bad, but he had to be strong with the new girl around, so straining himself now would only make matters worse and mess up the whole system.

Still, seemingly bored, Jax stood in his spot while rocking on his heels and looking off to the side, only sparing her a glance. Raggs sat up by then. She looked a little worse for wear, but it’s an improvement from hiding under her bed. She rested her elbows on her knees with her chin in her hands. The hurt in her eyes was long gone, but she looked tired. Poor thing, Jax shared the sentiment.

He felt her eye bore into the side of his face and the bunny couldn’t stop himself before he rolled his eyes and looked to her again. He could’ve choked on air when he saw her face, but the years of steeling his demeanor left no trace of his inner turmoil.

Raggs sported that longing look in her eyes again.

They were so close this time – closer than they’ve ever been before. Each time they spent together on nights like this, although few and far between, they grew closer… and hungrier. Neither understood what it was, but they never had the chance to just collapse into it, tonight being the closest to that.

But there was always something, right?

Jax allowed gaze to soften. His doll offered a small smile that almost ripped his heart out if his chest. It was drenched with melancholy of something she knew they could never have.

Because their roles in their little ecosystem didn’t allow for it to ever be theirs. It would never work.

This was survival.

The rabbit steeled his demeanor once again, but this time, his doll’s face didn’t fall.

Good, as it should be.

Jax walked to the door and fished out the key from his front pocket. He didn’t bother looking back. If he did, he wouldn’t have the will to leave anymore. When he opened the door, though, he couldn’t help but mumble out teasingly.

“See yah later, Doll~!”

He wished that he could shout his affections for her out into the void instead.

“I’m not your doll.” Ragatha responded, voice still wobbly and tired, but perky regardless. She knew just how to indulge him.

Yes, she is… she always will be.

Fanart: Evil with a target

Oasis: TADC AU list

Masterlist

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apple-and-berry · 1 month

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My point of view on Carlos Sainz vs Charles Leclerc discourse.

This is my first season of formula 1 and I have watched the races of previous 6 years and have good knowledge of the sport therefore I am commenting on this. This however doesn't perpetuate any hate towards any of the people mentioned.

Charles Leclerc is someone from whom there are a lot of expectations and he is held on a pedestal so high up that love and scrutiny comes hand in hand. He is a tremendously talented driver presented on the grid with WDC potential. When you are someone who is burdened with such pressure, you need to understand that people will more critical then appreciative. Sure you will be celebrated when you succeed but it would be awful when you fail because you are expected to perform well everytime. Fictionalizing situations and decisions taken by him or his team is a disrespect to both. Charles is not weak person as the social media and his fandom paints him out to be, he is someone who is strong and has generational talent.

On other hand, we have Carlos Sainz who is an exceptional driver as well. He is someone who is definitely underrated and doesn't show all of his tricks that he has hidden up on his sleeves. He has a distinctive driving style that can be defined as calculated. His performance this season is truly commendable according to me. He is talented no matter what people say but is he a WDC material? That's debatable. There are way too many factors that would need to be considered.

So now coming to the noise that is surrounding both drivers and what I am about to say can be considered for other drivers as well. These two drivers are amongst the 20 best drivers around the whole world and the fact that they are on the grid makes them talented enough. There is always a fine line between criticism and hate. If you remove the social media aspect from the driver and the racing you'll see that there is nothing to hate about any of them. They are there to drive and have healthy competition. That's it.

The people who are spreading hate and constantly criticising any of the driver for reasons except racing are just miserable people who hide behind a screen. They feel superior and validated when they do so. Disliking a driver is one thing but disrespecting him and his skills and achievements is a low. You can love and support one driver without bringing down other. It's possible wish good for your favourite driver without wishing bad luck on the other. They are humans not robots.

Why spread hate when you can spread kindness. Does being mean to someone and hating someone makes you happy? Will it count in your life?

I am sure years from now you are going to look back on these moments and think it wasn't worth it because it's truly not. Enjoy this sport of 20 cars going round and round and live your "real world" life. Fill it with love, fun and positivity.

#formula 1 #f1 #charles leclerc #carlos sainz #ferrari #australian gp 2024 #saudi arabian gp 2024 #bahrain gp 2024

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dckweed · 2 years

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Billy Hargrove x female hopper! reader smut /fluff where the reader is hopper/Joyce’s daughter (Byers /hopper family dynamic) and the reader has been sneaking out at night to get railed by billy. One day hopper is patrolling around lovers lake and the reader and billy are going at it and hopper taps on the window with his flash light telling Hargrove to cut it out but doesn’t know the reader is there, but one day when el, Jonathan, the reader, will, hopper and Joyce are having a family dinner Jonathan keeps poking fun at the reader for spotting her with billy in the hallways at school but she says it’s nothing and they continue with dinner. As they finish up Joyce spots bruises (like hand mark shaped bruises which were ovbvi from billy and hers sexual encounters) on the readers neck and she gets worried that billy may have done something to her so asks her what happened thinking the reader got hurt, and the reader keeps telling her it’s nothing and then hopper walks in and sees the bruises too and starts raising his voice so she tells them that no one hurt her and she explains without exposing and they catch on, and hopper realizes that she was the one with billy that night.

okay so i saw this come in and immediately i was actually excited to do this bc i already see it going in my brain, and technically i have one ahead of this and im so so sorry bc i was not expecting this to take me two whole days to write but omg here you go. this definitely has to be one of the longest ones ive ever written and i definitely want to do a part two bc i think it turned out super super good.

let me know what you think bby !!

warnings: minors do not read. sexual plot, choking, bruising, semi-public sex, almost getting caught, please wear condoms, this is purely for fictional pleasure only! Also fluff, angry parents, sibling dynamic! alot of flabbergasted hopper at the end lmao.

anywhore, i present you:

Part Two

' NOT PARENT FRIENDLY ' billy hargrove x female! reader

Now look, you were a good girl okay? You kept your head down, your grades up, you stayed out of trouble, you did the right things, you were co-captain of the Hawkins High Cheer squad, and you were the best big sister you could be to Eleven, who adores you almost more than she adores eggos. But that didn't mean that you didn't know how to be a bad girl, because believe you me, good girls are just bad girls that haven't been caught. Well, that is until tonight however, or almost anyway.

Your father was working the night shift, policing the now oddly quiet town of Hawkins through the evening and into the early morning hours, and you figured it was the perfect time to sneak out and see your boyfriend who was only your boyfriend in secret, which upset you but god you were addicted to him in ways that you didn't even think were possible to become addicted to someone.

In other words, he had you dick whipped. But even besides that, you had been drawn to him. Sure, he was a dick and a half at all hours of the day when he was around people who weren't you, and you knew that that was just a front because he didnt want to look weak around them, he didnt want them to see him the way his father did. It made your heart hurt for him, but you knew he didnt like to talk too much about it, which is why you hardly ever asked and chose to cherish the moments you had alone with him, where he was sweet and loving, almost dorky even.

Billy Hargrove wasn't what people thought he was, and you just wished you could show that to the world some day, but you couldn't. With a sigh you finish brushing your hair and turn to your little sister with a flourish. "What do you think, El?" You ask, looking at her hopefully. You had done the bare minimum of lip gloss, and had slicked your hair back with some barrettes, hoping you looked cute but still innocent enough, something that always manages to drive Billy crazy.

Eleven laid on her bed, reading a book on her stomach as you primped yourself in your shared mirror. "We're not supposed to leave.." She says, looking at you. "But you look pretty..you always look pretty."

"Sweetie, what dad doesn't know won't hurt him." You says, leaning against the dresser for a moment. You knew you were risking alot, you'd never been on your father's bad side before and sure enough this would be the thing that would put you there, but you were willing to risk it, in your teenaged brain it was completely worth the wrath of your father if you got caught. "Can you keep a secret for me?" You ask, just as a car honks from outside. You perk up, that was Billy. You had called him half an hour ago and as usual, he was punctual. "Please, El? I don't get to see him any other time.."

El nods, just as Billy honks a second time and you squeal, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek before running through the dark living room and out of the front door.

"About damn ti-" You cut him off mid sentence, giving him a nice long kiss, your hand in his hair. You pull away from him, noticing the slightly dazed look on his face. "What was that for?" He asks, reversing out of the driveway.

You shrug, buckling your seatbelt. "I missed you." Is all you say, giving him a small, happy smile. He says nothing, but places his hand over your thigh, giving it a nice squeeze with his large, warm hands.

Billy wasn't a sweetheart by any means, but he did have is sweet moments, and one of them seemed to have been tonight. He decided that he'd take you on a little dinner date and brought you to your favorite pizza parlor, where he even ordered your favorite pizza for you while you went to the restroom because even though he hated to admit it, he really did know you that well.

You sat across from him, gabbing on about how your day had gone, telling him about how you wanted to sucker punch your co-captain after she had been mean to some of the newer girls on the team, you really hated her some times. He sat and he listened, something that you absolutely loved because you knew that he was actually listening. You looked at him for a moment, your face flushing. "Im sorry, I'm talking to much..you could've just told me to shut up."

Billy looks at you, a small smile on his face. God, he really did like you more than he had planned to. "Nah baby, I love it when you tell me about your day." He says, his voice soft. Billy wasn't usually this quiet of a person, he always has something to say so you knew that something must have been bothering him. The bruise forming on his jawline told you that he must have gotten into it with his dad before he came to get you, it was small, and if you didn't know his face so we'll, you wouldn't have noticed it. "What?"

You shake your head, knowing that he didnt care to talk about his home life, and you didn't like to pry, but you wished you knew how to help in some other way beside getting your dad involved.

"You ready?" He asks, grabbing his leather coat off the chair next to him before grabbing your hand. He has been craving your embrace all day, and he had been looking forward to your call all night.

You nod, following him to the car.

You loved your nights with Billy, infact, some days you even craved them, though you often worried that he used your time together as a way to get his frustrations out about what went on at home, his anger at his dad being vented out during your sexual encounters.

You didnt stop him, you didn't mind the pain, hell it actually made your orgasm all the more better and tonight was no different, though he was alot rougher than he had ever been before.

Once you had gotten to lovers lake he had wasted no time in pushing you to the back seat, giving your ass a smack as you climbed between the front seats, your ass on full display for him.

He was on you in seconds, his mouth kissing yours roughly, his hands gripping you tightly. You pushed his clothes out os the way as easily as you could, your legs spread around him as you pushed his jeans down past his hips, his beautifully thick cock springing free from it's confounds.

You hum appreciatively at the sight, looking up at him as you wrap your hand around it, giving it a nice long stroke. He grinds his hips up into your hand, enjoying the feeling of you touching him. He groaned, his kiss moving from your lips to your jaw line, and down your neck, slowly rising your shirt above your bra as he lets his hands cup one of your breasts, kneading it gently with his fingers. You buck your hips up, rubbing against him at the contact.

You could tell that he was trying to be gentle, sweet even, and you loved the gesture but you knew what he needed, you let go of his cock, taking his face in your hands. He looks at you quizzically, worried almost. You brush your thumb over the still forming bruise, that's harder to see in the dark of his car, and you meet his eyes.

"Fuck me, Billy..whatever you need to do, however you want me..please, baby.." He closes his eyes, a long breath coming from his nostrils.

He opens them again, his hand going up to your hair, running his hand over the top of your head. He knew exactly what you meant, and honestly, without even knowing it, in that moment he had completely fallen head over heels in love with you, because how could he not when you're the only person that had ever seen through him like that? "Are you sure baby? What if I hurt you?" He asks, he was worried that he wouldn't be able to stop, that maybe you wouldnt want him anymore afterwards.

You shake your head, giving him a small smile. "You won't, Billy.." You says, giving his face a light squeeze between your hands. He nods once, his lips lingering over yours in a gentle kiss almost as if to say thank you.

You definitely didn't regret your choice in the moment, and god you were on your way to your third orgasm, his hips snapping into your pelvic bone almost meanly at this point, your leg cocked over his shoulder, damn near unable to breathe with the way he was applying pressure to your neck with both hands, you just knew his fingers were sure to leave lingering marks and fuck if the idea didn't turn you on farther.

You knew he was getting closer to his orgasm because the meaner he got, the harder he choked, the deeper he fucked you and the louder you got, was usually his tell that he was about to fucking explode.

"Good fucking girl, y/n, good fucking girl letting me fuck you so meanly." He grunts out, his hands still gripping your throat, fuck if he wasn't turned on farther by the fucking dumb little blissful smile you wore on your perfectly plump lips in that moment, or by how red and flushed your face was as you stared up at him. He wondered if he had finally fucked your brain to mush. "Such a pretty little whore taking my cock like it's nothi-" The sound of something knocking on the passenger side window interrupted the two of you and Billy stopped immediately.

"It's almost midnight, Hargrove, cut it out and take the poor girl home." You hear your father's voice call from outside, your eyes going wide. Billy is smart enough to cover you with his body, incase the chief happens to look inside. You give a squeak of fear, wondering if the two of you had been officially caught. You bury your face in his chest, squeezing his biceps in the hopes that your father wouldn't recognize your hair if he happened to look inside. He knocks on the window again, and it sounds like he's using his flashlight, you can see the beam cutting through the rear window. "Zip it up Billy, I'm not playing."

"Yes chief, I understand.." He calls back, trying hard to make sure you stay covered. "Do you mind like, going back to your car though, no need to watch us get dressed, Sir.". Your dad lingers for a second, but you hear his footsteps start to walk away, crunching on the gravel that littered the ground.

"Holy fuck that was close, Billy." You breathe, your legs shaking in fear, or maybe adrenaline. You really weren't sure which. Billy moves off of you, pulling out of you. You can't help the whine that escapes your throat at the feeling, already craving him all over again.

"Oh trust me baby, we aren't finished with this yet.." He says, giving you a cocky smirk as he buttons his shirr before stuffing his cock back into his pants.

You struggle with your shirt, still weak from the fear and from your two orgasms that has honestly rocked your fucking world. He looks at you, almost cheesily smiling at you. He loved it when he made you weak like that, he loved being able to shower you with aftercare, something he'd never wanted to do with someone before. "Here baby.." He says, pulling you closer to him. He helps you with your bra, and your shirt before helping you pull your skirt back down your body. When he's done he gives you a sweet, gentle kiss before helping push you back to the front seat.

"Thank you, Billy.." You say, settling into your seat. You watch him climb back over, settling into the front seat. You shiver a little, it had gotten cold by the lake and without the warmth of his body you were quickly chilled. Without a word he reaches behind you and grabs his jacket from the back, wrapping it over your shoulders.

He drives almost wordlessly, only talking to ask if you're okay, and thankfully you make it home quickly. He pulls info the driveway, and stops. You turn to him. "Im sorry our night was ruined.." you says, feeling horrible. You should have thought more before you told him to go to the lake, you had forgotten that your father was out patrolling tonight.

Billy shrugs, looking at you. "I had a great time, baby.." He says, leaning back in his seat. He watched you, taking in your beauty for a moment, a smile on his face. "maybe that's not the way I wanted it to end, but it wasn't ruined."

You smile, look away awkwardly. "You know, we wouldn't have to sneak around like this if you would just let me tell him about us.."

Billy sighs, he knew that you hated that your entire relationship was a secret, but god he was terrified that your dad wouldn't let him see you again, or that your friends would find out and convince you that he wasn't good enough for you. "I told you baby, I'm not parent friendly.." He says, he sees your face fall, if only for a second before you gather yourself up again.

You give him a smile, leaning over to kiss him gently. "I'll see you tomorrow, baby." You say, although really want to scream how much you love him as you get out of the car.

Eleven is waiting for you inside, her eyes go wide at the sight of the large leather jacket around your shoulders. "Dad's going to ask questions when he sees that." She says, causing you to furrow your eyebrows in fear. You take the coat off immediately, completely forgetting that it was on your shoulders. "And that! Are those his finger prints?"

The next morning went by as smoothly as it could have, you covered what you could of Billy's fingerprints on your neck, although most of the time was spent staring at them almost longingly. He'd left marks before but he'd never left bruises, you hadnt even realized he had been choking you that hard last night.

What couldn't cover in concealer and bronzer, you covered with a turtlenecked long sleeve shirt, it was chilly enough out that morning that you could get by with it without being asked too many questions. You threw on a pair of jeans and your favorite pair of shoes, making sure to stuff his coat into your bag before heading out of your room just in time for a car to honk out front.

You give your dad a brief kiss as El scrambles to get her things, he was leaning against the kitchen counter sipping his morning coffee. "See you for dinner dad, let's go El!"

Jonathan waited for you in the driveway, and smiles when he sees you. "It's a little extreme for turtlenecks, don't you think, Y/N?" He asks as you slip into the front seat, El getting into the back with Will.

Ever since your dad has started seeing Joyce, you and Jonathan had become close, you'd consider him a close friend, and you kind of wished you could ask him for advice about your relationship but you knew he wouldn't keep the secret, he would take it straight to your dad.

"Shut up, it's totally cold enough!" You say, looking at him weirdly as he pulls out of the driveway and heads towards the schools.

It doesn't take long before you're there, and once he's parked you get out of the car immediately, on your way to search for Billy, ignoring Jonathan shouting something after you.

The halls are filled with Hawkins High students, most of which know you. You give them all your best peppy smile, even throwing in a wave to a few of them, you loved being a cheerleader but sometimes it was exhausting having to smile so much, especially when half of the student population never expected to see you in anything but a happy mood.

You find Billy at his locker, which wasn't too far from Jonathan's. "You forgot this, Hargrove." You say, pulling his coat out of your bag, hoping that nobody would take it the wrong way since he still didn't want people knowing about you guys yet.

Billy turns, surprised to hear your voice, he looked you up and down, amused look coming across his face. You tried not to stare at the bruise under his jaw, it was darker than it had been last night. "It's still a bit warm out for a turtleneck, isn't it baby?" He asks quietly, leaning on the locker door slightly. He smirks as your face turns red, you hold his coat out for him. He pushes your arm back to your chest, you furrow your eyebrows at him.

"Keep it, i like the way you look in it." He says, a soft smile on his face as your face turns redder. You notice someone stop just for a moment as they pass. He had thought about it all night, trying not to notice the look of hurt cross your face when he had reminded you that he didn't want people to know about you guys being together. He was afraid of what would happen if people knew, but he was even more afraid of losing you by making you feel like he was ashamed of people finding out, and he could tell by the look on your face that that was beginning to happen. Besides, he was tired of fucking you in his car, he wanted to take you out on actual dates, and go to all of your football games to watch you cheer, he wanted to sneak into your room late at night like a normal person, and even though it terrified him, he wanted to meet your father like a man, not someone that's been fucking his daughter in the back of his car almost every night. "Besides, it'll keep that Byers boy off your back, I hear he likes to steal people's girls away." He sent a look to Jonathan, who was open mouthed staring at the two of you from his locker, Nancy by his side.

You roll your eyes at him, holding his coat to your chest, breathing in his cologne slightly. You loved the way he smelled, and you'd be lying if you said that you didn't sleep with it in your bed last night. "Jonathan is a good friend, he's like my brother now that my dad is dating his mom." You say, but you understood what he was saying without actually saying the words. You honestly couldn't have been more excited, you were practically vibrating in your shoes. "Are you sure?" You whisper, cocking your head at him quizzically. You didn't want him to feel like you were pushing him.

Billy rolls his eyes at you, he hated that you were so selfless sometimes, willing to living so unhappily just so he could be comfortable, but it was also one of the things he loved most about you. "Come here, I miss you." He says, hooking his finger into the collar is the turtleneck to pull you closer. He pulls you in for a sweet, gentle kiss, knowing that almost everyone in the hallways had turned to stare at the two of you. He pulls away, finger still in your turtleneck but pulled down a little. He sees the bruises and his eyes go wide, face paling. "Oh shit, baby, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you.." He whispers, pulling the shirt back up so no one would see. "Why didn't you tell me to stop if I was doing it that hard?" He asks, closing his locker to walk you to yours.

You blush some more, smiling up at him. "Because it didn't hurt that bad, I liked it." You say, deciding to put his jacket on as you walked, making him hold your bag so you could. You actually were cold though, despite everyone's teasing. "I'll have to skip cheer though, I have to wear my hair up..or just put my uniform over my shirt, we do that in the winter anyway..I just didn't think to pack my uniform turtleneck."

The day at school was awkward, and after waiting at Billy's car for Jonathan and the kids to get out, you gave him a deep, longing kiss good bye, damn near spitting out an i love you when Jonathan started honking his horn at you. "I'll call you later!"

You run to his car, climbing into the passenger seat, smiling at Will and El in the back. "Family dinner right? Im starving." You say, situating yourself. You notice Jonathan hasn't started driving the car and you turn to look at him only to find him already looking at you. "What?"

"Billy Hargrove?" He asks, a little unbelieving. "Billy Freaking Hargrove is who you've been sneaking out at night to see?" Okay so you had told him that you'd been seeing someone, just not who you'd been seeing. "Your dad is going to flip his lid, i think he might actually shit bricks when he finds out, y/n."

"I'll handle my dad, Jonathan." You say, looking at him pointedly. "I wasn't planning on telling him tonight, I need to butter him up first." You purse your lips, thinking. You figured you'd have to play a card that you hadn't played in a long time, daddy's little princess. "So, that being said, leave Billy alone he's a sweetheart on the inside, he's just a little rough on the edges."

You ignore Jonathan's scoff and stay silent the rest of the ride, happily getting out once you reach the Byers' house. You could already smell the food cooking and your mouth watered, your stomach growling in response. "God i love it when Joyce cooks." You say, walking into the house.

You make your way to the kitchen, setting your bag down by the kitchen table. "Hey," You say giving the woman a side hug from where she stands at the stove. "Ooh is that my favorite?" You ask, she leans s against you, happy smile on your face.

"It certainly is, how was your day?" She asks, and you grin. You planned on telling her about everything later, she had definitely become like a mom to you and you wouldn't mind the advice you knew she could give. "Oh? What's that grin for?"

"I'll tell you later." You say, going towards the living room, giving her a wink. She just chuckles and turns back to the stove.

You play with El and Will for a couple of hours, different board games coming and going, Will joined in on a few as well, the two of you often made it too intense with your sibling rivalry. You were just about to beat him in candy land when your father walked in.

You jump up immediately and head to him. "Hey dad, how was your day?" You ask, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. You didn't notice the look that Jonathan, Will and Eleven all shared with each other or the one that your father gave you.

"Uneventful, thank god." He says, patting the top of your head with one of his beefy hands. "Smells good in here, Joyce!"

It wasn't long before you all sat down for dinner together, you and Jonathan had even helped set the table, you sat across from him, next to Will as everyone started digging in.

The table was quiet for a while, until Joyce decided to make conversation. "So, how was everyone's day?" She asks, looking around the table before landing on you. "Y/N, you seemed like you had a good day.."

You notice Jonathan's shit eating smirk and you glare at him, trying to silently tell him to keep his mouth shut. He stares directly at you as he speaks. "Oh she definitely did, you seemed awful cozy with that Billy Hargrove in the hallways this morning, you were giving him back his coat rig-ow!" You kick him harshly under the table, your strong legs making rough contact with his shins.

"Oh?" Joyce asks, eyebrows furrowed. You notice your dad turn to look at you as well. "He gave you his coat? That's sweet."

You shake your head, your cheeks flushing. "It was nothing really, we did a project together the other day after school and I got cold so he gave it to me, I was just giving it back is all." You say, going back to your food. Jonathan makes a noise and you kick him under the table again, making the silverware shake.

"You sure it was nothing?" Your father asks, looking over you with those quizical eyes that always seem to know everything is a lie. You just nod at him, a mouth of food.

Your father doesn't say anything else, and neither does Jonathan. You decide to help Joyce after dinner, and start helping her wash the dishes. It's warm in the room, and subconsciously you pull at the neck of your shirt trying to give yourself some air, not realizing that Billy's fingerprints were on full display like that.

Joyce is mid sentence, talking about something that you weren't particularly playing attention to, and she stops abruptly, looking at your neck. You quickly snap the turtle neck back into place and excuse yourself to go use the bathroom.

You run down the hall, wondering how much of it she had seen. How the fuck were you supposed to explain that?

"Shit!" You hiss, turning in the bathroom sink so no one would hear you. You calm your nerves, and after a few moments you decide to go back out and act like nothing had happened. As soon as you step out of the bathroom you're dragged across the hall to her room and tossed in, the door closing behind you. "What the hell, Joyce?"

She flips the light on, looking at your worriedly. "Y/N, why are there fingerprints on your neck?" She asks, walking towards you. You sit on the bed, you knew you were screwed. You feel her fingers play with the collar is the shirt for a moment, almost as if she was scared to see it before pulling it down all the way rolling it so it would stay put. "Jesus Christ, these are from both hands..who did this to you? Was it that Billy that Jonathan was talking about? Jim! Jim come to the bedroom!" She yells, you try to stop her, but he's already in the room before it's too late, thinking something had happened.

"What?" He asks, looking around for danger. His eyes land on you and they go wide. "What the fuck, y/n,?! Who the hell hurt you like that? Im going to kill that fucking Hargrove boy-" He says already making his mind up about the situation.

He turns to leave and panicked you tell him to stop. "Daddy, stop!" You say, standing up from the bed. "Nobody hurt me, especially not Billy, he wouldn't ever do that okay?" You say, tears welling in your eyes at the thought of your father going to beat the shit out of him, you knew Billy wouldn't stand a chance.

Jim and Joyce share a look. "What do you mean?" He asks, taking his hand off of the doorknob. He was trying very hard not to be confused by your words.

You look at him, at both of them, your mouth opening and closing as you try to find the right words to say without embarrassing everyone in the moment. "I, um..gee how do i say this.." You say to yourself, looking down at the floor before taking a deep breath and giving both adults a sheepish sort of look. "I..well, to be quite frank, i liked it, okay?"

Both of them were completely confused for a moment, and it seemed to click with Joyce quickly. "Oh..oh.. alrighty then that's..more than I needed to know." She says, fidgeting awkwardly with her close as she tried not to look you in the eye, she didn't actually think that that would ever come out of your mouth.

Your father was taking a little longer, but you could see the wheels turning in his brain as his eyes start to widen. Suddenly he's pointing at you, one hand covering his mouth in shock, fear? maybe disgust? You couldn't quite tell. "Oh my god that was you last night.." He says, the realization finally coming full circle. "What the fuck were you doing out of the house?" He asks before his eyes wide farther. "What the fuck were you doing in the back of Billy Hargrove's car?! Oh Jesus don't actually answer it!" He says when he sees your mouth open. He slides a hand over his face, looking at Joyce almost panickedly, you can see his chest rising and falling almost rapidly, you wondered if he was hyperventilating. "I..I need to sit." He mutters, sinking onto the bed. Joyce takes the spot next to him, and you decide that now is probably a good time to go.

You sneak out of the room quietly and back down the hallway. Everyone is gathered in the living room and then to stare at you. "I think I broke our parents.." You say, not noticing Jonathan's wide eyes, you had forgotten to roll your shirt back up. "It's not what you think!"

#stranger things #stranger things smut #stranger things s2 #billy hargove smut #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove fic #billy hargrove #jonathan byers x reader #hopper #hopper x reader #jonathan byers #jim hopper

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butch-reidentified · 6 months

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wife & I finally watched Killing Eve, and I am just utterly 🤯 by how much of myself I see in Villanelle. the nuances of her reactions, her sense of humor, interpersonal relating, etc., all of it is genuinely deeply relatable. it's the first time I've ever actually truly related to a fictional character overall, rather than just 1 or 2 aspects of a character. as weird as it sounds, it feels like actually very wholesome representation? honestly, I've never really understood why people get attached to fictional characters and even kind of used to make fun of it. I never felt like there was much to relate to. but my wife and I both see it, this dude they consulted for her on-screen character obviously really knows his shit (yeah, this dude, fucking somehow).

him???? kinda pissed ngl. and I'm definitely gonna contact him lmao

but it's undeniable. it's most clear in the subtlest little moments, the little things she does like dumping salt on the curly fries she's sharing with Eve as a playful reaction to an "offensive" joke, the pranks she plays on Konstantin, the things she finds funny, the lack of response when her life is in danger, being ambivalent about prison. and of course the bigger things are just as accurate, and so much better done than any other media portrayal I've seen before. the constant need for escalating stimulation, the s-tier "commitment to the bit" regardless of the situation, the curiosity about herself, the boredom and resulting curiosity about the "normal" human experience & wondering if you can be like them - maybe even convincing yourself for a while, the truth of having some people truly matter to you but at the end of the day you know you're still able to hurt them, the enjoyment of social game-playing - specifically with others who are also knowingly playing social chess* (manipulating unaware people is not entertaining & frankly reminds me of the ways men tend to seek affirmation of their power/superiority by "punching down").

*and enjoying working + thriving in fields where this is required of EVERYONE

I'm posting this a bit late at night in the hopes it's mostly seen by the mutuals who actually come to my blog not just see this on dash, bc this /is/ weird as fuck for me & I'm not super stoked about EVERYONE seeing this, but I have made a commitment on here to challenge myself with consistent and total honesty to the best of my ability. it /is/ disorienting and exciting in its own odd way. but I'm not sure I hate it.

oh, and in s4 when she kills a bunch of women's abusers? the implication throughout the show that she DOES feel some type of way about (at least) 1 moral issue - misogyny? fuck OFFFFF bro wtffff

#mine #emotionality #female psychopathy #psychopathy #female violence

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milolovesbmc · 8 months

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wait wrol jeremy is canonically/intentionally autistic coded??? please elaborate what are his little autistic mannerisms tell me everything

OH MY GOD THIS IS THE BEST FREAKING ASK I'VE EVER GOTTEN!!! HOLD INTO YOUR SOCKS CAUSE I'M ABOUT TO RAMBLE!!!!!!

So, First off, Jeremy (in the Broadway/Off-Broadway productions) IS autistic coded!! since Will Roland based his interpretation/acting for Jeremy on teenagers from a theater camp he attended, who where most (not to say all) autistic. Also, I can't possibly talk about Jeremy being autistic without mentioning this, in the first/original version of Be More Chill Pt.1 one of the SQUIP's line to Jeremy is literally "every lame characteristic, makes you come off as autistic" which they cut (for obvious reasons) but there, had to be mentioned!! So in conclusion, yes he IS autistic coded!! With that outta the way:

WHY WILL ROLAND'S JEREMY IS AUTISTIC CODED!

EYE CONTACT

- This one is the one I have the least to talk about, it's mentioned he has issues with eye contact in More Than Survive, "[...] Avoiding any eye contact at all"

ABNORMAL SPEECH

- OKAY SO HEAR ME OUT ON THIS

- One of the biggest differences between Roland and Connolly Jeremy is how Will R Jeremy talks

- He has issues with Volume control, like how sometimes he's talking and he out of nowhere yells out a word or something and he seems to not notice? Also, he's the only character that talks louder than the rest normally (you have to differ this from stuff like how Michael screams the lines he says in More Than Survive while he's dancing, that's intentional, he's being goofy and having fun)

- Sometimes he talks too fast, like to the point he slurs his words, you can notice a couple or more of these throughout the show

- To finish off the speech thing, he talks in a really flat tone, you can tell not only by comparing his tone to other characters (like Jake for example) or if you compare the voice Will Roland does for Jeremy to the one he does for Jared in DEH, Jeremy's it's flatter

-I'm not too sure this is included in "Abnormal speech" for autism, but I felt like I had to mention that he does stutter/stammer (?) A lot throughout the whole show, it's even mention by the SQUIP in Be More Chill PT. 1 ("All your stammering's a chore" "Stammer?! No- no I don't stammer!")

- it's also suggested he speaks in a "weird" way when in Loser Geek Whatever he says "The please don't speak!" When referring to how he's perceived by his peers

SPECIAL INTEREST

- His special interest is clearly Superheroes and stuff of the sort (mainly from comics I'm pretty sure, but I don't know too much about superheroes) and he references them a lot of times and sees like most of his life and actions through more of a superhero/fiction sense

- The biggest example of him doing this is in More Than Survive (I'm gonna be mentioning MTS a lot here) when he says the line "If this was an apocalypse, I would not need any tips, on how to stay alive!"

- Also, I can even go into that one line even deeper, by this line he basically means that for him it'd be easier to survive in a zombie apocalypse rather than a high school, because an apocalypse has simple rules you need to follow to survive; getting food, not being biten by zombies... While to "survive" high school you need to do a whole bunch of stuff no one tells you you need to do; socialising, not having grades too high or too low, being cool, talking to people, making eye contact... Which are harder to him. This also means that he would know how to survive in a zombie apocalypse because of how much he plays Apocalypse of the Damned (most definitely part of his special interest)

- Also, here's some references/ties he makes between real life and fiction/superhero stuff:

"I like your sideburns, wolverine, right?"

"Like in X-Men?!"

- Not to mention one of his options for the SQUIP's settings was literally Batman

SOCIAL SKILLS

- I don't think I can give very specific examples here, but basically, the literal whole theme of the show is Jeremy not fitting in cause he's "socially awkward" and just generally "weird", you can mostly see it through how the SQUIP helps him socialize, the most clear example is maybe at the mall with Brooke and Chloe.

SARCASM, JOKES, METAPHORS ETC.

- Biggest one is in ILPR when Christine says "no this is where you meet for the swim team" when Jeremy asks about if you meet for Play Rehearsal there, and he takes the joke literally and starts to look around to make sure he's in the right place

- While Michael is talking about the Whole evolution thing, Jeremy is really confused, most probably because he doesn't understand why he's mentioning that as advice/metaphor?/an answer to his problems, then gets even more confused when he says "There's never been a better time in history to be a loser!"

- In Two-Player Game after Jeremy talks about getting the SQUIP and how it'll work and how it'll improve his life, Michael says "and if it does? Will you be too cool for... Video games??" He's clearly using that as an indirect way of saying he's afraid of losing him (which he actually does later on so that's fun!! /J) and Jeremy catches that but basically just completely ignores the metaphor thing and talks about it in a literal sense

RULES

- He mentions how he has some "rules" he follows to survive in More Than Survive (ofc it's in MTS) in the line "And so I follow my own rules, and I use them as my tools, to stay alive"

- This is not part of the musical, but it is in the book and I thought it was a good thing to mention here because it's pretty related, in the book he has these things called "Humiliation Sheets" they are papers he makes (and prints everyday, mind you) where he marks his social Humiliations, like when someone ignores him or laughs at him etc

MOTOR SKILLS

- Jeremy has like, pretty bad spacial awareness, like when he's Walking down the hallway In MS and he literally walks into half the people

- A really big example of it is in Be More Chill PT.2 when all of the people in the mall are flossing (as a whole thing because of the SQUIP) and Jeremy can't manage to get it right

STIMMING

- This is mentioned by the SQUIP in Be More Chill PT. 1, where it literally says "your tics and fidgets are persistent"

- Some of the ways he stims in:

1) The literal first line of the musical, when he says "c-c-c-c'mon c-c-c-c'mon go go!" that's a vocal stim, cause he's inpatient/nervous. (Also in I love play Rehearsal and voices in my head, maybe in some other moments too but idk rn)

2) Not to sure if this one counts as stimming, but he tends to hold onto things pretty tight (mostly through MTS) , like his sleeves or his backpack or Michael when Christine signs up

2.5) This closely relates to stim 2, but he also opens and closes his fists a lot, like clenching and unclenching them

(There's more but I can't remember all of them rn)

3) he moves his hands and rise and drops them a lot when he's upset and talking about what he's upset about, like in More Than Survive and Loser Geek Whatever, also, a lot of big gestures generally

4) At the Halloween party before (?) a guy that I'd kinda be into (Reprise) Christine asks "just say what's on your mind" and Jeremy basically makes a really weird noise which Christine goes along with, that's indeed vocal stimming!! They're stimming together how sweet is that!!

- This is not Jeremy related but I just wanted to mention it, Michael stims like A LOT, you can look at him in any scene and he will 99% surely be stimming in some way, specially in MITB (someone ask me about Michael being autistic so I can talk about that too pretty please /hj)

Can you tell I'm really into psychology and stuff?? This is basically my two fav interests combined, BMC AND PSYCHOLOGY YAYY!!!!

Btw feel free to talk about you own opinion/take on the whole thing, I'd be happy to know!! :D

#be more chill #bmc #jeremy heere #autism #will roland jeremy

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fangswbenefits · 9 months

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Soooo I love me some breeding kink—as many of us do—but ironically Ik for a fact I don’t want children. As a woman I think I’m just biologically wired to get turned on by the thought of it and the need to go bare so I can let a man (Miggy) stuff me full of his baby making cream. But when a man is so desperate/eager to have babies it pisses me off a little as well. Like you bastard you’re not thinking of me?? Everything my body and I will have to go through for your little spawn?? Three trimesters of hormonal changes, nine months of discomfort & aches, 40 weeks of on and off nausea/sicknesses, more than half a year of not feeling like myself, and for the grand finale 24+ hours of labor EXCRUCIATING labor. Oof it ignites a belligerent fire in my tummy, I would slap him. Bc how dare a man not think of what we’ll have to go through 😤

But…..

Buuuuuuut……

But but but but but………

Let’s say it happens. Miguel sees ALL the effects of pregnancy and shows guilt/remorse. Gives lots of apologies and ultimate top tier treatment. And during the labor seeing and hearing your tears, cries and whimpers of excessive pain makes him shed some tears for you. Like he’s trying his best to be strong for you but it literally pains him to see you in such agony. Then after the baby is on your chest crying her little lungs out and you can clearly tell he’s in utmost awe and love staring at her and caressing her little back but he immediately diverts his attention to you. The look of pure exhaustion your wearing and he gently says, “no more babies, mi amor. You’re not going through that pain again.” With tears in his eyes and BAM 💥 just like that I’d give him another baby in a couple years. That’s all I need, the acknowledgment of everything I went through and the sympathy and the passionate display of his love/care for me that he’d put his own desires aside just so I wouldn’t have to go through so much twice over bc he can’t stand seeing me in such a state. Like ugh he’s definitely worthy of another baby. He no longer begs for it (but still does f*ck like it) he truly insists no more babies. He’s showing just how deeply he loves and cares about your all around well-being. THAT is dreamy AF. Super duper f*cking hot & sexy. Like well now I just have to give you another one. It’s like Ik you really mean no more babies but this time I want to make another little human with you bc you’ve showed me you’re deserving of it. Also if I had one kid I’m doomed bc my kid definitely needs a sibling(s). Life just doesn’t seem as fun without siblings.

So in conclusion yea I’d let Miguel breed me with all his babies, NOT literally but yes. Yes. Just yes.

Okay, guys! Disclaimer time:

Just because people find certain kinks hot in fiction doesn't mean that translates to real life. I would not touch a man with a 10 feet pole if he had a violent breeding kink that fully disregarded my wishes and well-being.

That's why fiction is so much fun. You can just let your imagination go wild for that character, and explore endless scenarios.

With this out of the way, yes! Consent is sexy and I ALWAYS make that abundantly clear in my fics.

#answered ‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾

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theycallmebecca · 1 year

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18+ Drabble: The Great Tease

A few days ago, I was inspired to write a thirst trap story, but with a twist and that's what this is. I made a moodboard and I used photos I found here on tumblr and shared with friends in a discord, but that means I don't remember which blogs the photos originally came from...

Title: The Great Tease

Pairing: Andy Barber x female reader

Rating: R

Warnings: suggestive, fade to black sex scene

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is not to be reposted, used or translated without my permission.

18+ Disclaimer: This work contains sexual material that is for those over the age of 18. By clicking the keep reading link below, you are agreeing that you are over the age of 18 and are not offended by sexual content.

Usage Disclaimer: This work is for fans only. This author does not give permission for it to be shared, spoken of, referred to in any public manner (podcast, tv, online, etc.) that wants to either make a celebrity uncomfortable, mock fan fiction/fandom in any way, or the author themselves. Requests can be made, but it is unlikely the author will change their mind. If no response is given to a request then the answer is a solid no, not interested and the work cannot be shared, spoken of or even referred to, regardless of the manner or context.

“Have fun this weekend,” you said to Andy before you kiss him goodbye.

“Ugh, come on, you two,” your best friend said, feigning disgust. “Save something for the honeymoon.”

“Go wait in the car,” you told her with a laugh. “I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Fine, but I’m setting a timer for five minutes,” she said before leaving with your bags.

“What are you doing this weekend?” you asked Andy.

“Just hanging with the guys,” he replied with a shrug. “Probably play some golf, maybe some video games. I’ll definitely be available for anyone who needs to escape…”

“She’d kill us both,” you said with a laugh. “And killing the bride and groom during the bachelorette party would probably ruin the wedding…”

“LET’S GO!” your friend yelled from outside.

“I’ll text you when we get in there,” you told him then gave him one more kiss before you left.

“About time,” your friend muttered.

You stuck your tongue out at her then got into the car.

It wasn't until the two of you arrived at the rental house and you grabbed your phone to let Andy know that you were there, that your friend said, "This is a no boys allowed weekend. That includes texting."

"Just let me tell him that we got here, I promised," you told her.

"Fine, but I'm warning you right now, if he texts you at all while we're here, you're showing it to all of us," she stated. "No matter what. And no warning him, either."

You shook your head and sent Andy a quick text:

Here. Have a good weekend! 😘

Then you showed it to your friend. She nodded her approval and then the two of you got out of the car.

—------

"I know this was meant to be a girls' weekend, but I'm surprised I haven't gotten a single text," Andy said, later that evening as he and his friends had dinner together.

"Maybe we should text them and make sure they're ok?" one of the guys he didn't know as well said.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," your best friend's husband said.

"Why not?" one of the others asked.

"What do you know?" Andy asked, narrowing his eyes.

"I overheard my wife on this phone this morning," the husband explained. "If anyone, but especially you, Andy, sends a text while they're at this thing, it's getting read aloud and shown to everyone."

"Even dick pics?" one guy asked, nervously glancing at his phone.

"Anything that is sent from the moment they arrive to the moment they leave," your best friend's husband stated. "So be careful what you send."

After dinner, Andy went back to the house with your best friend's husband and another of their mutual friends, who were crashing at the house since they lived out of town.

"Your wife doesn't know you know, right?" Andy said as they drank beers.

"No, I didn't say anything to her about it, why?" the husband asked.

"Because we could have some fun with this," Andy said with a smirk.

"I'm not showing my junk to all those crazies," the mutual friend stated.

"We're not showing junk to any of them," Andy agreed. "But it doesn't mean we can't take some staged photos and send them to them. Think thirst traps."

"But won't it be suspicious if we all do them?" the husband asked. "Maybe it should just be you."

"I agree, it should just be you," the mutual friend stated with a laugh. "It will get the best reaction."

"Fine, you chicken shits," Andy said. "But I'm going to need help taking the photos."

————

The first text came as you, your best friend and your three bridesmaids were getting ready to play a game.

At your best friend’s insistence, you’d all changed your text alerts to be something different so it was easier to tell them apart. You and the others had overruled her idea, however, that the person receiving the text couldn’t be the one to look at the phone.

“That’s you,” she said, smugly.

“I know,” you replied as you got up to get your phone from where they sat on the counter. Looking at your phone, you saw that Andy had sent a photo and found yourself grateful that the majority had overruled the dick pic sharing rule, too. Meaning no dicks would be exposed.

Going into your messages, you nearly choked when you saw the photo Andy had sent you. It was just his bare pecs and torso, but it was a close up, showing off all his muscles.

“She definitely got something good,” one of the others cackled.

“Come share it with the group,” your best friend said with a smirk.

Grudgingly, you handed her your phone and they all leaned in to take a look.

“Hot damn,” one of them said while another whistled.

“I knew he was hot, but lucky you,” another said, winking at you.

“Ok, enough ogling my future husband,” you said, grabbing the phone. “We have a game to play.”

“Fine, but you aren’t allowed to text him back,” your best friend reminded you.

“I know,” you replied though you were suddenly wishing you were at home with Andy and his muscles instead of with your friends.

Hours later, a second photo came as you all were getting ready for bed. This photo was of Andy in bed with a picture of his torso and half of his hip 'V' on display with the rest of his lower body hidden under the sheets.

“Are you sure we can’t call our partners?” one of your friends asked after passing the phone.

“No boys allowed!” your best friend stated.

“She’s just jealous 'cause her husband doesn’t look like that,” another muttered as she looked at the photo a little too long for your liking.

Once you had your phone back, you gave it a last, longing look then locked it for the night, thankful that each of you had your own room.

The third and fourth photos were waiting for you when you woke up the next morning. One was Andy standing at the kitchen island, coffee cup on the counter and his hoodie unzipped showing his entire torso. The other was Andy with his back to the camera and only wearing an apron with the top of his ass showing.

“I don’t know if I can look Andy in the eye anymore,” one of your friends said. “Not after these thirst traps.”

“Did you tell him?” your best friend asked, looking at you.

“When would I have told him? You only let me text him once and that was to let him know we were here,” you replied. “And you read that message.”

“You told me on the phone the other day,” another friend spoke up, looking at your best friend. “Did your husband overhear? He’s with Andy isn’t he?”

“I’m going to kill him,” she muttered and reached for her phone.

“Uh huh,” you said, grabbing it with a grin on your face. “No boys allowed. Your rule.”

“Your future husband is sharing all his goodies,” she replied.

“Not all of them,” you stated. “Besides, it’s kind of fun. They think they have one over on us.”

Your phone dinged at that moment and you opened it and your jaw dropped. Andy was wearing his wedding tux with the shirt completely open and he was stretched across the bed, showing off his torso.

“Fuck,” you muttered when you could finally think again. You looked up at your friends and blinked, once again wishing Andy was nearby to jump.

“Distance makes the bride to be hornier,” one of the girls teased.

You flipped her off and placed the phone on the table for them all to see.

Five additional thirst trap photos were sent to your phone during the remainder of your girls weekend, each of them highlighting Andy’s torso and/or arms and proving that Andy knew just which parts of his body you liked the most.

You were so turned on by the photos that you didn't invite your friends and their significant others to have dinner with you and Andy like you had originally planned to. Instead, you had practically rushed them all out of the house, upon getting home, then turned to your future husband.

"Strip," you ordered him.

Andy's eyebrows shot up and then he grinned. "You did get the photos then," he said, obviously pleased with himself.

"And we figured out that you knew about the no boys allowed rules," you replied, crossing your arms over your chest. "Now stop stalling, hot stuff, you showed off all weekend and now I want a taste."

"As you wish," Andy said, simply.

Then took his sweet time undressing, which you normally appreciated, but your desire had been building for nearly two days. Yes, you had masturbated last night in the shower, but that wasn't the same as being with Andy.

After what seemed like forever, he was naked before you, partially aroused.

You'd planned to play with him a little, but you needed him sooner rather than later. You quickly removed your clothes and then closed the gap between the two of you.

"Remind me to torture you a bit later," you said to him before you pressed your lips against his.

"Will do," he whispered against your lips.

Then he made love to you.

#theycallmebecca #theycallmebeccawrites #Andy Barber #Andy Barber fanfiction #Andy Barber fanfic #Andy Barber fan fiction #Andy Barber x you #Andy Barber x female reader #Andy Barber x y/n #becca writes 18+ drabbles

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kazisgirlfriend · 4 months

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Viren, TDP, and Narcissism

The Dragon Prince has never shied away from depicting mental health issues.

First we had trauma as manifested by magic.

Then we had anxiety as manifested by magic.

Then we had a look at PTSD and depression in Through the Moon.

Which got me thinking, what sort of other mental health issues has TDP been portraying all this time?

Then it sorta hit me, after re-reading one of the show's novels and @jelzorz's rather brilliant fic here (seriously, go check it out), that the show had been exploring a mental disorder that is extremely popular as a character trait, but rarely discussed in fiction - narcissism.

Narcissism (or Narcissistic Personality Disorder) is one of the more common personality disorders, so it's kind of surprising that it is so widely misunderstood. Usually, people don't seem to have a lot of interest in narcissists outside of demonizing them, and in shows they often make great antagonists (or even fun protagonists) without exploring this inner psyche much more beyond that. So it's natural that narcissism is also explored in TDP as well.

If the title wasn't a dead giveaway, what I'm trying to say is Lord Viren is a narcissist.

I should probably preface this with a couple things. First, I'm not saying that Viren is a psychopath. Psychopaths don't really care what other people think of them, while narcissists are constantly preoccupied with how other people see them. Narcissists deeply crave validation and respect from others to feed their egos and self-worth. Narcissists also don't have a problem telling right from wrong; quite the opposite, in some ways narcissists are not only able to tell right from wrong, they for the most part want to do right because of their desire to be liked or at least as seen as important.

Viren doesn't qualify as a psychopath, but in re-reading his POV and rewatching key scenes from the show, Viren quite easily meets the official definition of a narcissist. His desire for recognition, even and especially in high-stress situations, reaches alarming levels. His love for his children is genuine but it's clear he sees them mainly as an extension of himself.

More importantly, of the nine signs of narcissistic personality disorder, Viren meets a,uh, breathtaking number of them. Namely all of them.

A grandiose sense of self-importance

Viren kept his gaze steady. It seemed the other rulers had not doubted his lie. They accepted at face value not only that Ezran was alive, but that Viren had been made regent. And why wouldn’t they accept it? In a more rational world, it would be true, and the council would have entrusted me with the leadership of Katolis.

Book 2: Sky - Chapter 17 "Summit at the Pentarchy"

Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited power, influence, or success

For once, can't these imbeciles treat me appropriately? Maybe when I save them all from Xadia I'll be greeted with greater respect. "I suppose 'Welcome Lord Viren' would have been too much to ask," Viren said.

Book 2: Sky - Chapter 17 "Summit at the Pentarchy"

A belief that they are special and can only be around people who are important or special

They all want to meet with you. They think of you as the leader of Katolis. Viren could barely wait for the meeting. These leaders had only seen him on the sidelines. But he knew all about them.

Book 2: Sky - Chapter 17 "Summit at the Pentarchy"

A need for excessive admiration

Was he really ready to give his life for thousands of regular citizens? People he didn't know and would never meet? But on the other hand, he would be remembered forever as a hero. "I can help," Viren said to Harrow.

Book 2: Sky - Chapter 19 "Heart of the Titan"

A sense of entitlement

Viren’s face went white with rage. He’d come here with the best of intentions, prepared to give his life, and the king was too stubborn to even listen. He curled one lip up. “Oh, are you sure you wouldn’t prefer ‘Your Royal Highness’? Or ‘Your Esteemed Inimitable Majesty’ perhaps?” Harrow didn’t deserve the loyalty Viren had been prepared to offer.

Book 2: Sky - Chapter 9 "Viren's sacrifice"

Taking advantage of others to achieve their own ends

A lack of empathy

“Ohhhh. Yes, who wouldn’t have a problem with dark magic?” Viren sneered. “It’s clever, it’s brilliant, it’s practical. You are too stubborn to make use of the tools that are available to you. It will save your life, just as it has saved the lives of countless others.” “It’s a shortcut,” King Harrow snapped back. “We may not pay now, but we will pay the blood price eventually.” “Now you’re starting to sound like her,” Viren said with a smirk.

Book 1: Sky - Chapter 5 "The Letter and the Serpent"

Envious of others or believe that others are envious of them

Arrogance of otherwise haughty behavior

Viren laughed derisively. Such a question could only come from an ignoramus. He looked at the other council members and shook his head, trying to bring them into his confidence.

Book 2: Sky - Chapter 2 "The Breach"

Viren's narcissism drives his central flaws. His hunger for personal recognition eclipses his concern for collective welfare, even when Katolis faces catastrophe. His children become conduits projecting his ambitious legacy rather than cherished loves unto themselves.

However, unlike most shows, TDP doesn't use Viren's narcissism to demonize him. Instead, the show threads the needle by making Viren both villainous and sympathetic as a result of narcissism, since it's both the reason he does awful things but also his shield from the perception of vulnerability and worthlessness.

It's important to remember that narcissists are not only capable of self-loathing, it is often a key part of their condition. That grandiose sense of important mentioned earlier is often a thin veneer hiding feelings of shame, self-doubt, and self-hatred. Obsessive self-loathing is a form of narcissism.

But the show lays bare these vulnerabilities, letting us see his internal struggles to do right constantly brush against his emotional needs that never seem to be met. He walks right up to the line of doing something noble...

...and then shirks at the last minute.

However, just because Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a chronic, lifelong condition doesn't mean that narcissists are incapable of change. And indeed, Viren hits a breakthrough in the most recent season.

One element of narcissism is that they love extremely conditionally, and see their loved ones (particularly their children) as an extension of themselves. Indeed, Viren does "love" his children in this way, particularly Claudia, who he sees as people he can mold into his own image. Unfortunately, for Claudia, this seems to have Gone Horribly Right.

But in the end, Viren recognizes his own behavior and breaks out of it. He sees how pushing Claudia to be like him - to be an extension of himself - has brought her to ruin.

While it's fun to watch characters who are blind to their own faults and lack of self awareness, it is equally rewarding watching Viren reach this moment of clarity. Most narcissists are oblivious to the harm they cause others (since hurtful behavior is just collateral damage to having their emotional needs met), but Viren now realizes the harm he has caused Claudia. Witnessing Claudia’s self-destruction, his conscience awakens to recognize his culpability for exploiting her for his own ego.

Treating her downfall as his personal failing is a real breakthrough for him. Which is why it makes sense that, once Viren reaches this level of awareness, taking a principled, noble stance against his own personal interests quickly follows.

Anyway, those are just my takes on this deep, complex character. If you made it this far, thank you for reading!

#tdp #viren #claudia #soren #callum #ezran #dark magic #aaravos

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tranquilpetrichor · 1 year

Text

the friendship problem

synopsis: in which you have company during morning break, and it is strangely tolerable.

cast: jiung (p1harmony) x gn!reader

genre: strangers to friends, high school!au

wc: 1.1k (1,117)

warnings: discussions of loneliness, reader is implied to show some symptoms of social anxiety, barely proofread

notes: looking back at my high school experience (and reflecting on my growth throughout school in general) thus far makes me oddly nostalgic. this one's definitely self-indulgent. here's to the people who didn't ask me why i was so quiet, who accepted my idiosyncrasies and admittedly, brought out a friendlier side in me.

(also peep that word count i wasn't gonna post this originally but i must, i count 1117 as a small ateez reference.)

erasing the inappropriate drawings from the side whiteboard, you began to write a problem from your calculus textbook.

“integral of w squared times sin of 10 w…” you said out loud to yourself.

you could have gone outside, as it was time for break, but you found your math teacher’s classroom to be more comforting. natural light gently shone through the windows, the air freshener emitted a scent of pine, and best of all, there were no crowds to be found.

you had tried to get over your discomfort around large crowds and navigate to the cafeteria to buy a snack, but found that it was quite the pain in the ass to squeeze between couples who walked as slow as tortoises and boys who elbowed people everywhere they went.

through those wonderful experiences, you learned that the epicenter of your high school’s social life overwhelmed you the hard way.

shaking intrusive thoughts from your mind, you began to visualize solutions to this calculus problem. after a minute or two of writing, you had the answer.

“let’s go!” you cheered, knowing no one else would hear it, but finding it funny nonetheless.

suddenly, you heard a voice and turned around to see a classmate you vaguely recognized from classes you shared. jiung, that was his name.

“don’t mind me,” he said, “just looking for a place to read.”

your shoulders tensed up a little, but you nodded, resuming your work on another problem.

normally, you would expect an noticeable and uncomfortable silence, but jiung seemed to be just as at peace with the quiet as you were. that was more than you could say for a lot of people, who felt as if they had to fill silence with words that seemed rather meaningless.

curiously, you glanced at him reading. the book was an alternate history fiction novel by haruki murakami, titled 1Q84. you've read it before, of course.

"uh, enjoying your book so far?" you asked him, cursing under your breath afterwards when you got the low battery notification on your laptop.

"well," he paused briefly, "murakami's descriptions tend to be long-winded and i find some of the scenes a bit odd, but it's interesting for me. have you read it before?"

"yeah, i have. i had fun trying to make sense of all the symbolism, but i admit that 1Q84 can be a tough read for some."

you tried not to show it, but your eyes sparkled with excitement.

"since you've read it, it'd be nice to talk to someone about the book once i'm done." he smiled. "wait, your name is y/n, right? i've seen you in some of my classes."

you set the whiteboard marker down. “yep. and i know your name is jiung.”

he stared at the board in front of him, now filled from the not-quite-top to the bottom with math problems. "you wrote a lot in such a short amount of time. do you find math easy?"

you shrugged. "let's just say it's relaxing for me."

he did ask an interesting question. to be fair, you hadn't always liked math as much as you did now, being a highly stubborn child who was averse to doing their homework back then.

however, a natural curiosity to learn new concepts coupled with a preference for being alone gave you the time to sit down and ponder random topics, developing a special love for math due to its basis in objectivity.

in general, your teachers loved the fact that you asked questions and stayed during morning breaks and after class sometimes—their classrooms felt like a second home.

so yeah, you discovered that you liked doing math, and it was better than being around people who deliberately excluded you, or trying to participate in conversations where you knew you wouldn't get a word in.

better to be alone than to feel lonely, right?

(yeah, just keep telling yourself that.)

he stood up to stretch. "that's cool, i definitely admire that. you don't hear people call math relaxing often."

"to each their own. i just think it's important for someone to have something they enjoy, and who gives a shit what it is if it doesn't hurt anyone?"

you probably shouldn't have added the last part, as it came out more defensive than you anticipated. however, jiung didn't seem surprised. his eyes were kind and welcoming.

"i think it's a good rule to go by. there'd be way less conflict in the world if people minded their own business. oh, speaking of that, i hope i didn't bother you by coming in."

to your surprise, you didn't mind. "of course not, it is a teacher's classroom anyways, not mine, so obviously people have the right to come in, although most don't. and i mean, i do prefer it to be quiet while working. but your presence isn't bad or anything."

you twirled the whiteboard marker around in your hands. “quite the opposite, really. i actually liked talking to you.”

“do you not like talking to others?” he joked, probably noticing the emphasis you put on “liked.”

“i figure i either scare people away or they’re not the kind of person i want to be friends with anyways. also, not gonna lie, socializing is hard.”

for better or for worse, you knew what people thought about you—this was a fairly small school, after all. it was easier to just isolate than to worry about who was judging you.

"nothing wrong with incompatibility," he said with a small smile and a shrug. "it just means there's people out there who are better suited for you anyways."

you hadn't thought about your situation like that, but that was probably a wise way to put it.

"that... actually makes sense."

where was this dude lurking? it would have been nice to get to know him earlier, you thought. although it might be too early to tell, you had put him tentatively under a category of "people that were better suited for you."

jiung glanced at his phone for a quick second. "break's ending soon, so i have to head to my history class, but i enjoyed talking to you!”

he headed toward the door, but as he was about to leave, he turned back, as if he was forgetting something. "hey, mind if i get your kakaotalk information? let's chat again sometime."

you entered in your number, voice a little shaky. "i'd love to chat. and if you ever need to find me, i'll be here, like i always am."

"well then, i'll see you around!"

he walked to his next class, leaving you to ponder if it really was so difficult to make friends after all.

#kflixnet #kwritersworldnet #p1harmony x reader #p1harmony scenarios #p1harmony drabbles #p1harmony fluff #p1harmony headcanons #p1harmony reactions #p1harmony angst #p1harmony jiung #choi jiung #tranquilpetrichorfic

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