Loki: “I’m the real Gabe!”
Gabriel: “No, I’m the real Gabe!”
Dean: “Who do we shoot?”
Sam: “There’s only one way to find out.”
Dean: *nods*
Sam: “How do you spell bananas?”
Loki: “B-A-N-A-N-A-S!”
Sam, shooting Loki: “Wrong answer.”
Dean, looking at Sam in disbelief: “Woah! THAT IS HOW YOU SPELL BANANAS!”
Sam: “Yeah, but Gabe sings the song.”
Gabriel, singing: “It’s bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!”
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I HEARD THAT YOU WERE TALKING SHIT
AND YOU DIDN'T THINK THAT I WOULD HEAR IT
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This whole Merlin mess has giving me whiplash yall
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Of course Penny “Deranged” Mordaunt blames the SNP for the disastrous Glasgow Willy Wonka Incident.
What the fuck?!
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HOLY SHIT DID THEY UNDERSTAND THE ASSIGNMENT
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I would love to sleep more.
Alas that will not be the case today.
‘Twas awoken by my 🐈⬛ who was hunting a mouse 🐁 on my bed.
My beloved predator catches the thing, brings it to show me; and as of yet keeps losing the thing when she does..
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Meanwhile, on the opposite side of the planet from Iowa's CORN PALACE...
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I just love when a coworker starts talking shit like I'm not going to hear about it.
Honey, please, there isn't a soul in my school that you could shit talk me to that won't immediately come and tell me about it because the all like me and enjoy working with me.
All I have to say, honey, is bless your heart because I ain't no hollaback girl
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man thank god i’m not a dream stan anymore
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Thank you to everyone who got me to 5000 likes!
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Kansas is fucking biblical man
In the summer, you get all of the above in Kansas:
-Tornadoes pretty much every day
-a shit ton of hail
-way too much locusts for it to be normal, like they’re everywhere
-whole lotta rabbits, like those big ones
-a LOT of toads and frogs
-and lots of property damage due to tornadoes
All Kansas needs at this point is blood to fill the rivers and for their firstborn in every household to die
What is this shit? The book of Exodus? Where’s Moses??
-C
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Some of my stupidest migraine triggers, in no particular order:
Sleeping too little
Sleeping too much
Skipping meals
Caffeine withdrawal
Stress (you try being alive rn without being wicked stressed all the time 🙃)
Stripes!!???!??
Bright lights
Strong smells
Weather changes
Seasonal changes
Temperature changes (IE going in and out of air conditioning)
Sensory overload
Traveling
Fresh baked bread
Wearing 97% of bras
Hormones
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